Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Chapter 1:

“I can’t wait to see you darling, I’ve missed you so much” Lisa’s voice echoed on speaker whilst Carla was packing her suitcase. “I can’t wait to see you either and Betsy, ive missed you both more than I thought” Carla chuckled. “Oh charming!” Lisa snorted “oh give over! You know I’m only messin’ with ya” the brunette giggled “right lovey, I’m gonna finish these bits up and grab some food with Chelle & Ry before it gets late but I’ll ring you later tonight?” Carla said hopefully “yeah of course darling, enjoy your last night with them, I’ll speak to you later. I love you” the blonde said. “I love you too babe” she replied before the call disconnected.

Carla, Michelle & Ryan went for some food down at one of the local pubs in the area, Michelle had been recommending it since they arrived and that it was a must before they head back home.

“Right come on Carla, seriously how are you feeling about it all? You’ve been away from it for a few weeks, have you managed to have some downtime or like ya know just think about everything?” Michelle asked passing the salt “I don’t know Chelle, I mean it’s a lot, we’ve already been through a lot this year alone and like I said to Lise I can handle a lot of things but this is something I’m not too sure about, I trust her more than anything of course I do, but I don’t trust Becky one bit, I’ve asked little bits here and there about her but Lisa’s just said the same that she’s been round for Betsy etc” Carla busied herself cutting her food & grabbing sauces.

The conversation flowed as normal they reminisced, laughed but both Michelle & Ryan could see the way the laughter never fully reached Carla’s face and no matter what the topic was it somehow circled back to current circumstances and the not-so-dead wife “have you heard from Roy? You asked him to keep an eye on stuff whilst you’re here” Chelle asked bluntly, Carla caught the side eye from Ryan who appeared non the wiser about the situation “what your mother mean Ry is that before we left to come here, I popped in to see Roy, I wanted to ask him for a favour obviously I didn’t know how it would go considering our relationship was dead in the water but he actually said about putting it behind us, which made me so happy and I didn’t want to just ask him but I knew if I pussy-footed around it I wouldn’t of, so I just asked him to keep an eye on Lise, Betsy & also Becky and to answers your mums question, no I haven’t heard from Roy which I don’t know if it’s a good thing or - well actually no who am I kidding the man only got a mobile 3 years ago so who knows Becky might already have half her stuff moved into my house by the time I get back” she laughed the last bit Michelle & Ryan exchanged a look and could see the toll it was taking on Carla. “Look Carla” Ryan said putting his fork down and placing his hand over hers “Lisa has made it abundantly clear it’s you she wants, it’s you she sees a future with, this situation is shit, it’s weird, it doesn’t make any sense at all like at all, things aren’t necessarily adding up regarding her story but one thing I do know is Lisa loves you, Betsy loves you, I love you, mum loves you, Roy loves you, okay maybe that was more than one thing, the point is you’ve done more for Lisa and Betsy in the last 18 months than Becky has in the last 4 years and I see how you and Lisa are together, I see the way she looks at you, she’s well and truly besotted with you” Carla could feel tears pricking in the corner of her eyes she didn’t want to start crying in the middle of the restaurant, Michelle sat stunned unsure what to say for the first time, Carla’s mouth opened and closed but no words came out - “look put it this way, Becky ain’t go shit on you auntie Koala” he chuckled trying to ease the tension “god Ry, when did you get so wise ey? I hear what you’re saying, I do, but 18 months compared to 20 years is nothing and put a child in the mix, like I said to you, if she leaves me..” she took a sip of her water before carrying on “she leaves me” her breath shaky as she finished her sentence.

Chapter Text

After their last meal together, Carla, Michelle & Ryan went for one last walk by the canal, Carla & Michelle teasing Ryan about his younger years “god you were like a shadow, always following Carla around wherever she went you had to go with her people thought you were her son more than mine” Michelle chuckled “Car do you remember - when -“ Michelle couldn’t contain her laughter “when you were leaving town for 3 DAYS to go see your mate and Ryan was hid in your boot crying his eyes out because he said and I quote-“ they both started chuckling and said in unison “Auntie Koala doesn’t love me anymore that’s why she’s leaving” they both chuckled , Ryan looking less than impressed “alright alright that’s enough now the pair of ya” he replied trying to hide his smirk

“Aww don’t worry Ry I will never leave you again” Carla giggled wrapping her arm around his shoulder giving him an over exaggerated kiss on the cheek “ughhh get off me” he wriggled out of her grip wiping his cheek, “I thought I was gonna have to take ya with me, had to bribe you to get out the bloody boot and the only way you would co-operate is by me giving you my ring that I had to put on a chain to make sure you didn’t lose it” she smirked pointing at the ring on her finger as he rolled his eyes at her

“yeah well I had to make sure you stuck to your end of the deal didn’t I, I knew if you gave me that ring you’d definitely be coming back -“ he was interrupted by Michelle quietly sniggering “what you laughing at? You were well annoying for them three days” he turned looking over his shoulder at his mum as they continued their path “oh nothing SHUSH” she glared at him before carrying on “you’re thick as thieves honestly you were back then and still are now” she giggled Carla narrowed her eyes between the pair clearly unaware of how Michelle was on the three days she went away

Carla slowed her path for Michelle to catch up to her, wrapping their arms around each others shoulders as they continued walking down the canal “so why have I never heard about how annoying you were them three days I was gone? Whenever we spoke you just said how much Ryan was driving you mad asking how many hours it would be till I was back, or was that just code for you wanting to know” she smiled really smiled at Michelle which didn’t go unnoticed “you know that’s the first proper smile I’ve seen from you these last two weeks you’ve been here it’s nice” Michelle replied “don’t be daft Chelle, and yeah it’s nice reminiscing about the old days - though I don’t want to reminisce everything mind you, anyway don’t try change the subject why don’t you tell me how hard them three days were for you?” Carla teased “oh give over, I was bored shitless, it was a bank holiday weekend and you decided to bunk off so I just pestered Ryan-“

“And by pestered she means would NOT leave me alone, honestly Carla you’d of thought you two had broken up all I heard was ‘I miss Carla’ ‘look Carla would love this pizza’ woe is me” Ryan shouted

They carried on teasing each other Ryan reliving Carla’s gay panic to his mum whilst Carla gave daggers that could kill before stopping at a bench along the canal the one that they regularly sat at during their visits. The sky was beginning to darken the cold air becoming brisker the three of them sat in a comfortable silence until the heavens opened

“Oh for goodness sake - Ryan give me your coat” Carla shouted trying to keep her hair as dry with her arms “told ya to wear a proper jacket didn’t I?! Come on get under this” Michelle laughed propping her umbrella up

The three of them rushed back to Michelle’s home Ryan kicking puddles at them laughing, Carla & Michelle squealing. It was the first time in 7 weeks that Carla had truly belly laughed since Becky’s return. Although the trip wasn’t an escape of what she was going back to, she certainly needed it. She trusted Lisa, she didn’t trust Becky even with the constant anxiety niggling in the back of her mind she knew that nothing has happened whilst she’s been away in Ireland, she was ready to go home to her girls and be there for them.