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English
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Part 4 of iltae abo au
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Published:
2025-11-02
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2,299
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1/1
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remember when

Summary:

There's something that aches in Taeui's heart that he can't describe. It feels like a mixture of resentment, anger, and even betrayal.

Notes:

so this story came up after a discussion with my friend, starlight53.

remember when ilay's dumbass let taeui walk in on him and xinlu and we never get tay beating both their asses up even tho he should have? well YEAH that fic was basically born except in an abo universe

dedicated to my friend starlight53 💕

not beta read & try to take it with a grain of salt if you find the characters a little ooc. i tried to do it in a manner that is still somewhat realistic (realism in an abo verse idk ha)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Taeui thinks for the most part he's pretty level headed. He's easy to get along with, he doesn't have many complaints when it comes to others. Maybe it has something to do with his low self-esteem.

He's never considered himself to be good enough, and he knows that most people would consider him average at best when compared to Jaeui. It's easy to pretend that he's okay, even when everything is falling apart.

It's also relatively simple for him to understand why people choose to do the things that they do. He learns it's better to not take things personally.

But when he's six months pregnant with twins, there's something deep inside him that snaps.

It starts during breakfast. They're sitting together with Kyle, Rita hovering in the background when Taeui mentions Jaeui and Rahman wanting to visit.

“No.” Ilay says coolly as he cuts a piece of sausage, placing it down on Taeui's plate.

The brunet frowns, looking over at his mate.

“I want to see hyung though–”

“No.”

This time Ilay's tone is authoritative. It's deep and controlling, an alpha's command.

His inner omega wants to submit. It's in his nature to give in, and the years that Taeui has spent with the other man has led him to concede in other avenues. He knows of Ilay's jealous streak, he's aware that his brother and Ilay barely tolerate each other.

Hell, he can even understand since he doesn't like Jaeui's choice of partner either.

But there's something in him that breaks.

“Ilay, do you remember that one time you let me walk in on you fucking Xinlu?”

Kyle chokes on his coffee, wheezing as he turns to his side. He can hear Rita pause, her hand hovering in the air.

Ilay's eyes widen as he looks at Taeui, his mouth opening and closing. His expression reads of guilt and horror.

Taeui stares at him, his face unreadable.

“I want hyung and Rahman to visit.”

Ilay stares at him for a long time, before looking at his plate blankly.

“Okay.” Is the alpha's only response.

He's beaming when Jaeui and Rahman visit Berlin. Despite him not getting along with Jaeui's partner, the other man warms up to him slightly due to his pregnancy.

There are dozens of gifts. Various toys, clothes, and children books that are in Korean, English, and even Arabic.

When Jaeui touches his belly, Taeui feels his eyes prickle with tears at the fondness that scents his older brother's pheromones.

“You look happy,” Jaeui murmurs softly in Korean.

Taeui laughs, rubbing at his eyes. He gives a small shrug, smiling at his twin.

“I am. I feel mostly tired though.”

“I can imagine…” Jaeui trails off, glancing over at Ilay who is glaring at both of them from across the room.

The alpha reeks of absolute jealousy. It's a dark scent that smells ugly and makes Taeui nauseous.

The brunet covers his nose, glancing over at Rahman who is sitting uncomfortably next to Ilay. The other alpha gives off a scent of nervousness and Taeui isn't sure if it's due to Ilay's possessive nature or the fact that Jaeui was sitting far from him.

“Rahman, do you want to touch?” He asks shyly. Taeui feels Jaeui squeezing his hand gently, beckoning for his mate to come closer.

“No.” Ilay hisses.

Despite being an alpha, Rahman immediately sinks into the couch. Taeui can tell the other man is resisting the urge to snap back, but he's not about to challenge another alpha regarding their mate.

“No, it's okay. He's basically the twins's uncle–”

“Jeong Taeui.” Ilay snarls, standing up. He can smell it, the murderous rage that is boiling over. How dare Taeui even consider asking another alpha to touch him. How dare he let him near him and their children.

There's something about Ilay's actions that irritates him. Taeui is understanding, he thinks he's a decent enough person. He knows what he signed up for when he decided to spend the rest of his life with the other man.

But Taeui is just asking for one concession. Just one tiny thing.

“Ilay,” He says softly, his eyes shifting from Jaeui and towards his lover. “Do you remember the time you let me walk in on you and Xinlu having sex?”

The air in the room immediately becomes uncomfortable. He watches Ilay's eyes shift from anger to immediate shame. Taeui stares as his mate stiffens, his scent shifting from anger to pity.

“Excuse me?” Jaeui says slowly, his tone completely flat.

Taeui reaches over, grabbing both of Jaeui's hands.

“Hyung, it's okay–”

Jaeui's own pheromones spike with anger as he gets up, looking over at Ilay.

“You did what to Taeui?” Jaeui hisses.

Usually Ilay would have no problem taking Jaeui on. If anything he was more than willing to murder the other man if he could get away with it.

But this time he remains quiet, avoiding Jaeui's stare entirely and focusing his attention on Taeui.

His face is pitiful. Absolutely pathetic, Taeui thinks as he turns away.

Jaeui however is still seething as he stares hard at Ilay. Rahman gets up and walks over, placing his hands on his mate's shoulders as he gives a gentle squeeze.

“Relax.” He says softly. His tone is soft, pleading. Rahman however does glance over at Ilay, and Taeui can see the look on his eyes explicitly reading you dumb fuck.

When Christoph and Richard come over with Oliver, Taeui and Ilay's relationship still hasn't recovered since the visit with Jaeui and Rahman.

It shouldn't have been a big deal. He can deal with a lot, he's used to whatever life throws at him. But for some reason he itches with unbridled rage.

Taeui can just blame his hormones on that, right?

The brunet shifts uncomfortably in his seat, his hand resting against his belly. The twins have been pretty moody lately. Either moving around or kicking up a storm. Maybe they're upset about something. Could they pick up on pheromones?

He's lost in his thoughts, rubbing his stomach absentmindedly before he hears Christoph speak.

“Are you okay?” The blond asks quietly, moving closer to Taeui.

Taeui smiles despite hearing the sharp intake of breath that comes from his mate. He chooses to ignore it.

“I'm okay. They just get a bit restless sometimes.”

Christoph hums, glancing down at his belly.

The alpha's pheromones are calm and comforting. Especially when compared to the other two alphas that sit across from them.

The intensity of Ilay's scent flares up when Taeui leans closer to Christoph. He can pick up the annoyance on Richard's, but that man tends to irritate him anyway so Taeui ignores those overbearing pheromones.

“I think the babies like your scent. They calmed down a bit.” Taeui murmurs quietly.

Christoph's expression is unreadable. He watches Taeui carefully, ignoring the glare that Ilay is giving both of them. For a moment there's a fondness that flickers in the alpha's blue eyes.

“Do you want me to scent something for you?” Christoph asks shyly. Before Taeui can respond, Ilay can barely contain a growl that escapes his throat.

Taeui jolts, looking over at the platinum haired man who looks like he's ready to strangle the blond.

“Ilay!” He hisses.

This seems to anger his mate even more. His eyes are dark, anger and betrayal evident.

“I already tolerated what you and your brother did a few weeks ago, but this is pushing it–”

“I don't know why you're acting jealous. I'm not like you. Who's the one that fucked someone else's crush right in front of them?”

The silence that envelopes the room is absolutely deafening.

There's something that aches in Taeui's heart that he can't describe. It feels like a mixture of resentment, anger, and even betrayal. He's buried this feelings long ago. There really isn't a point in bringing up the past, but this stupid alpha won't stop smothering him. He won't stop controlling him, not once has he ever apologized–

Christoph glances over at Ilay, his expression cool.

“You know Taeui, it's never too late.”

Richard can barely contain the laugh that slips out, covering his mouth as he looks at Ilay. His own gaze is questioning.

Are you really going to let your omega talk to you like that?

Taeui can see it. The hurt and anger that flash in Ilay's eyes.

But honestly, he's fucking tired.

Later that night, they lie in bed together. He turns away, his back facing Ilay. Taeui would rather sleep in another room tonight, but he knows that Ilay would just follow him so there was no point.

He yawns, curling into himself. Taeui can feel himself slowly drifting off before Ilay speaks.

“Are you still mad about what happened with that kid?”

Taeui let's the moment stretch out. He thinks about it, reflecting on the feelings he felt previously.

“I wasn't mad that you slept with him,” He admits quietly.

It was the truth. In all honesty he can't control how two consenting adults act. Especially since there was no definitive label between him and Xinlu at the time.

“Why do you keep bringing it up then? It's been years. I told you it's was one time–”

“It's not because you slept with him. It's because you made me feel so small at the time.” His voice cracks, his eyes squeezed shut.

When Taeui remembers the emotions that he felt back then, it was definitely betrayal. But not by Xinlu, it was towards Ilay.

For a moment, neither of them say anything. He doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He doesn't want to remember how pathetic he felt when he thought Ilay cared about him, when he thought the alpha considered him a friend.

He can hear the sheets rustling and then the familiar press of Ilay's chest against his back.

“What do you mean?” The other man asks softly. Taeui can hear the concern etched in his voice and that's when he loses it. All the emotions he's bottled up start bubbling, spilling out of him.

“I was hurt back then because I liked you as a friend. But you treated me like shit like everyone else.”

His voice cracks, tears spilling from his eyes in such a pathetic fashion. How absolutely pitiful he was. Crying about something that happened years ago. Being upset about two adults he wasn't even in a relationship using him as a bargaining chip.

At this point Taeui is sobbing, his body shaking as he buries his face in his arms.

It's as if the years of bitterness flows out of him, his feelings trying to bury him alive.

He stiffens when he feels Ilay tightening his grasp, pulling him closer.

“The thing is you never said sorry either. You said so many other fucking things but you never realized how insignificant you made me feel.”

Taeui's wiping at his eyes furiously. The tears won't stop falling and his heart is aching, he feels nauseous, he wants it all to go away.

He feels Ilay kissing his head, his mate's hand resting against his belly.

They sit together in the darkness, the occasional sound of Taeui sniffing and Ilay murmuring into his ear.

“Why didn't you tell me?” Ilay asks after a moment, his hand rubbing Taeui's belly slowly.

Taeui scoffs, turning to look at Ilay. He knows his eyes have to be puffy and red. He probably looks like a blotchy mess even in the dark.

“What was I supposed to say? It's not like you actually cared about me back then.”

The words come out harsher than intended. He notices Ilay wincing, and in all honestly Taeui can't find it in himself to feel even a little bad.

“I didn't understand what my feelings were back then. If I had known–”

“It doesn't matter anymore.”

His words are curt, looking elsewhere. Anywhere else to avoid Ilay's face.

“You two were consenting adults. There was no reason for me to get mad at the time. I just thought you were the biggest asshole for making me feel like I mattered to you.”

Ilay's hand twitches against his side, unsure of how to react to the statement. Taeui figures he's trying to find a way to comfort his distressed omega.

“I wasn't in love with you back then. But I genuinely liked you.”

He can hear Ilay's soft exhale, his mate's fingers curling into his shirt. Taeui squirms before he presses his face against Ilay's chest, sniffling.

“Don't ever make me feel that small again. Promise me you won't.”

Taeui feels the other man's fingers combing through his hair before he takes the brunet's face in his hands, looking down at him.

“I'm sorry.”

The words are absolutely foreign. They're also nearly a decade too late. But there's something about the vulnerability in Ilay's voice that breaks him.

Taeui blinks away the remaining tears in his eyes, looking up at Ilay who's own face is one etched in a mixture of concern and sorrow.

He blinks again before leaning up, pressing their lips together.

The kiss is a little salty due to his tears, and he feels a bit of hesitance on Ilay's side. But when he deepens the kiss, he feels his mate respond by kissing him back gently.

“Promise me you won't treat me or the twins like that.” He says softly, covering Ilay's hand with his own.

Taeui watches a variety of emotions flicker in Ilay's eyes before other man kisses him again.

“I promise.”

The words are gentle, pleading.

Taeui sniffs again, his bottom lip wobbling as he smiles.

“I really do love you, Ilay.”

He feels his mate's lips against his forehead, the soft touch of the other man's hand against his belly.

“Me too.”

Notes:

it always grinds my gears what ilay and xinlu did to tay with this. sometimes i wish tay would just walk away with chris. 🤪 and i love iltae.

clarifying subgenders:

originally i wanted jaeui to be a beta, but figured he could also pass as a dominant omega. his scent is probably the most comforting to taeui after ilay's.

rahman is an alpha.

chris and richard are both alphas. and b4 anyone says oh chris is a bottom, he's so pretty. remember chris is a baddie and legit will kill you so it made sense for me that he is an alpha since he & richard have a super unconventional relarionship lol.

i think tae probably just attracts unhinged alphas. 😭

i honestly thot this was gonna be more funny than angsty but re-reading passion reminded me how terrible insecure taeui is with his low self-esteem. 🥺

hope you did enjoy this! let me know! thanks again.

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