Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“FUCK!” Tubbo walked around in the middle of the room, his best friend Tommy still standing at the TV with the remote in his hand shaking, staring at the wanted picture on the screen of his best and only friend.. Tubbo
Tommy spun around to find a gun to his head “T-Tubbo.... Tubbo” Tommy stared wide-eyed at the person he thought he once knew.
“I'm sorry Tommy..” was the last thing he heard before the gun fired. The sound of the gun was overshadowed by the ear piercing noise of bones cracking. His vision flashed to pure white, as his head felt as if it was on fire. His mind blanked and all he could feel was the blood gushing from his skull, the wet liquid poured down his body like a waterfall. He couldn’t scream or even move for that matter, the pain was excruciating and the sound of the bullet drilling through his head was unbearable. With his eyesight gone every sense he had was intensified immensely, He assumed he blacked out but the pain continued like he was in some paralyze- like state, suddenly everything went quiet. Tommy’s vision faded to a dark crimson red and the pain switched off like a light bulb.
This felt so long for Tommy.
But for Tubbo it took seconds, and just with one small movement his best friend fell to the floor, crimson red blood painted Tubbo and the ground below. Tommy looked so- so very lonely on the floor, Tubbo dropped to his knees moving the loose hair behind his ear. Tubbo whispered “it's okay, it's all okay, now” Tubbo stood up quickly going to pack his things, he looked in the mirror his face covered in blood, in like what you might think, Tubbo didn't feel upset or even the smallest bit of guilt, honestly Tubbo felt nothing about killing his best friend.

Tubbo looked over to the lifeless body of a person Tubbo cared for so much, laying on the floor, he smiled, he was always smiling, they always smiled.
Tubbo looked away running towards the car rushing to put his things in, once everything was piled up in the back seat Tubbo grabbed the keys and jumped in the driver seat turning the car on, only when Tubbo was on the highway he put his seatbelt on, it wouldn't be great to be pulled over, now.
Tubbo ended up in a.. café? Odd Tubbo doesn't remember driving here, His stomach growling his hunger must've gotten them here. The café was actually really nice; it had windows that met the floor to the roof with vines growing over top of it, with flowers and moss poking out from the cracks of the pastel pink brinks. The light littered the ground outside, lighting the path along the building. He walked towards the glass door pushing it open, A soft sound bell rang when the door opened.
Tubbo walked up to the counter where a handsome looking fellow walked over to serve him, he was tall with short brunette dreadlocks in, a pair of clear glasses rested on his nose, he was wearing a baby pink apron over dark clothes “Hello! How may I get you started for today?” The tall man looked at the clock “well uhh finish..?” He spoke with a heavy French accent. He nervously smiled at Tubbo, it was 9.. pm. What café stays open this late?
“Um something easy..” Tubbo stood staring at the man, 'this dude had some odd looking eyes' one eye was brown while the other green. Other than the odd colour of his eyes which were very pretty at least to Tubbo, It suited the awkward worker. He just stared at his eyes 'such perfect shades'. The stranger shifted under Tubbo's stare.
“Uh, like a coffee or some..thing... Pie?” the man nervously bit on his lip
“pies, great.” Tubbo softly smiled moving his attention away from his eyes, that seemed to bring the worker some confidence as he.. blushed? Maybe...
Tubbo seemed to be the only person in the cafe other than the hottie serving him. The barista turned away, going to put a small pie in the microwave oven. “Why's this place open so late anyways?” Tubbo played with a straw from the holder.
“Oh! Usually some stray cats or dogs come around for food so I stay until late to feed them, and sometimes some poor people come round for some leftovers” he was more chatty now.
“That's sweet..” Tubbo didn't realise what he said until the male looked at him flustered. “Sooo what's your name?” Tubbo decided to just start a conversation with the worker liking his little reactions
“Uhh.. Se...thh…” he looked away embarrassed, his voice getting small “hi seeeeee.. thhhhhhh I’m Augusss..tusss, but call me Tubbo.. please” Ranboo chuckled softly, pulling the freshly cooked pie out of the small oven. Tubbo watched him contently put the pie on the plate and sent it in front of Tubbo.
“Your pie's ready” Ranboo smiled ready to walk away before Tubbo grabbed his hand “Come sit with me”
Ranboo blushed a deep crimson red “I uhh” he stared at their holding hands “s-sure..”
“Yay..!” Tubbo smiled, picking up the plate and walking over to a table hand still interlocked with Ranboo's, they both sat down next to each other.
Ranboo sat next to him not daring to look at him. Tubbo put both his and Ranboo's hand on the table as he ate. Tubbo traced his thumb gently over the various scars on the other’s hand, with enough courage Ranboo asked Tubbo a question he didn't think he'll hear,
“Are you single?”
Tubbo looked at Ranboo with wide eyes “sorry?” He was stunned, questioning if he's about to be hit on.
“um no I um just I want to... No I umm.. fuck sorry that was weird I shouldn't have asked sorry” Tubbo laughed squeezing Their hand. Ranboo looked away, really embarrassed “shut.. up” Tubbo laughed harder at Ranboo’s embarrassment. Shortly after, Ranboo laughed with him. Two idiots laughing in an empty café.
After their laughing fit they both looked at each other “what's with your eyes?”
Ranboo was confused until he remembered their oddly coloured eyes, “they're weird aren't they..” he looked away to try and hide them. Tubbo put his hand on his cheek turning Ranboo's head towards himself.
“I think I worded that wrong haha they're cool, really cool"
“You think so?” Tubbo let out a small hum of approval, staring at his face. Tubbo pulled his hand away, looking down.
“You work here, alone?” Ranboo also looked down, he fiddled with his hands looking embarrassed, like the fact of working alone late in the night was depressing.. Which it was.
“Of course not, they just don't work this late heh" he smiled. Tubbo looked at him again resting his head on his free arm, still holding Ranboo's hand.
“What about you, do you work?” he asked Tubbo, he got a panicky look on his face and recoiled, releasing Ranboo's hand to be met with the cold outside air, leaving a cold burning feeling in Ranboo’s flesh from where the other hand was, he moved his hand to his thigh to try and warm it up as Tubbo pondered on an answer,
Tubbo can't quite tell him he's a full time robber as a job,
“I don't work I can't” Ranboo looked confused “I mean- I can't.. no one will hire me” Tubbo closed his eyes 'good save' he was proud of himself. “Hmm I could help you get a job if you'd like?” Ranboo offered. Tubbo would accept but with his name and face on the news he couldn't. “It's fine, I'm sure I'll get one soon enough”.

The two talked for hours until it was nearly midnight. They talked about all sorts of subjects, even sometimes just sitting in silence just enjoying each other's company. When they both decided they should go home it was around 12 at night, Tubbo helped clean and lock up the café before leaving.
“Uh drive safe” Ranboo waved goodbye, noticing Tubbo walking towards a nice green car, stolen of course but Ranboo doesn't know that
“Oh yeah—” Tubbo ran up to Ranboo holding out the last of his money, “for the pie” Ranboo pushed his hand away
“It's fine,” he smiled.
“You sure?" Tubbo pushed, but the brunette only nodded; assuring Tubbo that it was fine.
Ranboo and Tubbo both waved goodbye to each other before going their separate ways.

‘Tap, tap, tap’
Tubbo woke up in the backseat of his car by the sound of tapping. He sat up looking out the side window. It was raining and Ranboo was there, it was still dark out. Tubbo didn't bother driving, and he had nowhere to drive to so he stayed in the parking lot. After a considerable amount of time to realise Ranboo was outside, he unlocked and opened the door for him. Ranboo welcomed himself in the car, sitting down and closing the door, turning to look straight at Tubbo.
Tubbo was very sleep deprived; he didn't even bother to acknowledge the situation and just passed out, unfortunately landing his head in Ranboo's lap snoring as soon as he met with Ranboo’s thigh. “I-” Ranboo began but his own panic dissipated and his thoughts were just thinking how cheesy and cliché this scene was, he just patted Tubbo's head allowing him to sleep.

Chapter Text

Tubbo woke up in a totally different place he was no longer in the backseat of his car but in a bedroom, a really fucking fancy bedroom. Tubbo looked down to see what or.. who in this case, he was sleeping on. His head was resting on Ranboo's stomach, Ranboo was laying down with his upper back up on a pillow.
“Morning” Ranboo smiled softly staring at Tubbo
“yeah morning--, the fuck are we???” Tubbo looked confused so so confused
“well I saw you hadn't drove of so I went to go check on you to then it started raining, I sat in your car and you fell asleep with your head on my lap, so I waited for the rain to stop and took you to my house, and you didn't let go of me so I just slept with you” he smiled looking proud of himself, Tubbo stared dumbfoundedly “I said where not what happen dork” Ranboo quickly lost that pride “well- I answered your question and another possible question you might ask”
“touché”
Tubbo was completely out of it he just looked round the room amazed and confused, “this your bedroom” he stopped and stared at Ranboo.
“No this is just a guest room” he smiled, moving hair out of Tubbo's face behind his ear. He blushed, 'flirty, rich bastard', if he can make a guest bedroom this fancy then he must be loaded, Tubbo couldn't help but wonder 'why was he working at a café?.
“Breakfast?” Ranboo offered happily, going to sit up. Tubbo slid off his stomach and almost fell off the bed if it weren’t for Ranboo grabbing his shoulders. “Sorry” Ranboo said sheepishly, and pulled Tubbo up to sit him properly on the bed, when Ranboo met his eyes he was concerned with how they were completely devoid of emotion, Ranboo stared into Tubbous’s soulless eyes before the unsettling discomfort seethed deep in his chest, forcing him to look away though it didn’t help the feeling he was being watched; judged. Ranboo couldn’t wrap his head around the fact how someone could look so unreal, with no emotion. Tubbo looked like a void, deprived of all and any human emotion possible, Ranboo started to wonder if it was his sleep deprived mind making him go insane or if the person in front of him was really human. He looked anyway trying to beat the uncomfortable feeling from his chest honestly hoping that Tubbo would get the idea and look away. Even though his gaze was eating Ranboo alive he didn’t feel scared.? In his presence, any other person he would try and hide from. He was different..
“Sure–” Tubbo finally answered. He looked more ‘Human’ now.

Ranboo had given him clothes that should fit him alright, and showed him the shower and where everything he needed was, and left him to do his thing. fore-eyes walked down to the kitchen. But the feeling of Tubbo’s stare on him ligured, he was puzzled with the man. He looked innocent but felt like he could take everything and your soul away in just one quick movement, it made his spine shiver thinking of his emotionless face. He just tried to ignore it, and went to go make breakfast for the two of them.
Tubbo walked down stairs ending up in a big empty room before he could look around he heard his name be called. He turned his head towards the voice meeting eyes with two fucking big ass doors 'why on earth would one person need such big fucking doors for' he looked around finding out that- All the doors where huge 'rich people are weird' he walked towards the massive logs of wood going to push the door open, when it opened for him. Amazed Tubbo walked into a nice and definitely way too fancy dining room.
Ranboo was already sitting at the table with... Breakfast
“Spaghetti?'” Tubbo pointed to Ranboo's overflowing plate of spaghetti. Ranboo’s head shot up and when he made eye contact with Tubbo he had the biggest smile. It hurt Tubbo's head that someone could look so happy.. and genuine about something they did. It reminded Tubbo of a child that's showing their parents something that they made for them. The corners of Tubbo's mouth lifted even if the feelings in his chest were bare.
Finally Tubbo sat right in front of Ranboo, where a second plate was less filled with spaghetti. Ranboo must have paid attention to Tubbo’s anemic looking psychic.
“Thank you,” Tubbo said appreciatively. The smile completely left fore-eyes face now replaced with confusion, “what have you never been thanked before” Tubbo asked, noticing his expression.
“No I have, It's just people don't thank me other then when I'm working”
...
“Thank you”
“What are you saying ‘thank you’ for?”
“I'm thanking you for saying ‘thank you’ to me” Ranboo got embarrassed
“You have to say ‘your welcome’' when someone says ‘thank you’ to you” Tubbo chuckled
“This is confusing..!”
“That's cute” Tubbo twirled his fork in the spaghetti, filling his mouth with actually good tasting spaghetti. Maybe he was thinking that because he hadn't eaten for a while and that pie was small.
“Huh?!” Ranboo was embarrassed and now flustered.
Tubbo looked at him though his brows “it's good” he smiled so softly it was crazy to Ranboo to even think that what happened earlier and this person In Front of him was the same person. he didn't know if he should say ‘thank you’ or ‘your welcome’ so he just settled with with trying some himself.

After breakfast, Tubbo had left saying he had to do something Ranboo just thought he was gonna get his car but it's been 10 hours the walk to the café from Ranboo's house was only an hour. He was worried. Even if the two had come to know each other, Tubbo was still a stranger. Ranboo thought he just went home.. 'Why didn't he say anything?' He was upset of course but he turned the lights off and headed to the bathroom.
He had just gotten dressed from his shower when the door opened.
“Hey!..” the voice faded when he saw Tubbo standing there covered in blood.
“Hey.” Tubbo all so calmly said, 'what happened, how did you get in, how did you open that door, are you alright' we're all questions he wanted to ask him but he couldn't form a response he just stared. “Oh- don't worry it's not mine, mind if I use the shower again?” This only concerned Ranboo more. On the other hand Tubbo was content with getting in the shower, so he took off his stained red shirt.. Ranboo's- now stained red shirt off and looked at him “you gonna watch me undress pretty boy?”
Ranboo was out of it, but he still heard Tubbo.. 'pretty.. boy' fore eyes was used to compliments which he didn't know was catcalling but hearing it from Tubbo sent him to completely malfunction, he spun around so quickly you could say he nearly broke the sound barrier. The bathroom was definitely smaller than any other room in this place. Strangely, because Ranboo was quite tall. He hated big open spaces. He doesn't know why but they make him uncomfortable and that may sound strange for living in a legit palace, but he wasn’t the one that brought the house.
Before he knew it Tubbo was in the shower, he looked over at the shower curtain before returning to what he was doing before. “What happened?” fore eyes finally got over his confused gay panic and actually said something.
“It's nothing don't worry”
“You said it wasn't yours.. did you cause it”
Tubbo looked at the silhouette of Ranboo through the shower curtain, staring emotionless... again. “I was protecting myself” he said in a tone, fore eyes couldn't determine if he was lying or not.
“Are you hurt?” He didn't feel okay not asking.
“Just a few scratches don't worry” Tubbo turned the water off grabbing a towel hanging near the shower and wrapped it around his waist before drawing back the curtain and getting out of the tub. Ranboo had not noticed Tubbo behind him as he was to focus on brushing his teeth. He felt eyes on him, ones that hurt his chest, he looked in the mirror and found Tubbo looking straight at him through the mirror his face was cold, Ranboo's heart pained him like he was getting stabbed over and over again, he had this immediate feeling of fear and a strong desire to run away, his palms felt clammy around the toothbrush
“Tubbo?” he mumbled. And it was like it never happened. Tubbo's face turned warm and nice. Ranboo rubbed his eyes, spitting out the toothpaste.
“You have any uh.. clothes I could steal, I kinda got the other ones..” Tubbo glaces at the red pile “-Dirty”
“Maybe after you tell me whose blood that was,” Ranboo said leaning on the counter.
“I'll just find it myself” “arsse!” he mocked Ranboo’s accent while exiting the room.
Tubbo left the bathroom on the hunt for a new pair of clothes. Tubbo walked into the new room, it was clearly by luck that he even found Ranboo's room, it was colourful and very maximalism and personalised, unlike the rest of the house. There were shelves and chairs and rugs and everything looked in place not a signal thing looking like it didn’t belong which was surprising because everything was different, all had different vibes; from colourful to dark, to ocean themed to valentines. Honestly it just looked hippie, It was nice to look at to say the least. Tubbo ventured into another room, a massive walk-in closet that had less clothes and more books, it looked more like a small library, piles of colour notes were stuck to the wall and built in yellow and pink shelves, where clothes would’ve hung previously, now held books and textbooks. Tubbo looked around trying to find the clothes, they were on the left as soon as you walked in, shirts and jumpers hanging while trousers were folded neatly on the shelf below. Tubbo grabbed a hoodie and some sweatpants, putting on the clothes, discarding the towel on the ground. He walked back to the bed, struggling to hold the pants up, he stopped to tie them up.

***
Ranboo looked at the bloody shirt on the counter before picking it up along with the trousers and putting it in the dirty clothes basket. He left the room to see Tubbo with a very oversized hoodie on, the end of the front of the hoodie was lifted up and tucked under his chin showing off his stomach as he tied the strings of Ranboo's sweatpants. Tubbo looked up, allowing the hoodie to fall back down. “Thanks for letting me stay and to steal your clothes” he was grateful that Ranboo was nice and that he hadn't seen the news about him being wanted.
“Uh you're welcome” Ranboo hoped that was the right one to use.
“I should leave tho” he started to leave the room,
“Wait!’’
Tubbo stopped and turned to face Ranboo, turning his head to the side in question. Ranboo fiddled to find his phone pulling it out clumsily "can I get your number?" He said, extending his arm outwards towards Tubbo.
"Are you hitting on me?" Tubbo joked, grinning.
"NO, ahh it does seem like that doesn't it I'm sorry I just want"
"Calm down, I got it" Tubbo assured while grabbing his phone and making a new contact, "here" he handed the phone back.
—
Auggie'
Ranboo laid in bed with a smile on his face that night.

Tubbo had left the house he ended up not grabbing the car back from the café cause he got unwanted.. company. He walked and walked for quite a while, the street lights lit the path with a gentle yellow, he ended up back at the cafe almost like something was pulling him back here, either way it was dark and he didn't have a lot of time to keep wandering around. He walked around the side of the building finding a good enough corner to sleep for the night.
He curled up in the corner getting comfortable.
His chest hurts, he couldn't stop it, it burns, something, something about that person hurts him in a way that he can't just get rid of, he can't cover up the pain. He's never felt this before but it hurts too much to leave or not be in his presence. What was it..
"Hey! You alright!?" Tubbo's eyes shot open staring straight at the silhouette of a taller person, he had a flashlight shining at the ground In front of him. 'shit' someone was here and Tubbo knew what they were. He got up slowly and put his hand behind his back, "who are you?" The silhouette yelled again and Tubbo walked over to him faking a limb. Once he got closer to the light he clenched the bottle in his hand moving it out of the hero's view. "Hello?" The hero reached out to Tubbo.
"Hey!"
Tubbo grabbed his wrist pulling them towards the left of himself, the flashlight going wildly lighting Tubbo’s face. In a sight of recognition the hero’s face turned distorted and terrified. Tubbo lifted the bottle up bringing it down with a surprising amount of force, smashing the glass bottle over the back of their head, glass flew everywhere leaving cuts on both Tubbo and the hero. The small amount of alcohol spraying everywhere, the hero fell to the floor rolling on their back, holding the back of their head. With one kick in the chin the hero was out cold.
but they saw Tubbo's face and he never left a victim just out cold.
Tubbo dragged the hero deeper in the alleyway, pushing him in the very corner he was sleeping in. As much as he didn't care at all he did have some pity for the hero, just a person that wants to help people at least that's what everyone thought. To Tubbo hero's were power hungry just wanting to be known as someone more than just a civilian and with the power they were born with, they could.. they could be someone else. For just wanting to be known in society and to be looked up to, they put quite a lot of effort into their training. But the same thought was for villains, people that didn't get a chance in society, someone that was thrown out, someone that hero's used to get popular, money and pride. But the way villains don't get to try made Tubbo to really pity them.
But they're all the same, they both want to be known, they want power, fame, even money. Life's unfair. Some people don't get a choice.
Tubbo positioned the broken bottle over the hero's chest taking a look at which hero he was about to plunge the bottle down deep in their chest, weird Tubbo has never seen this hero, what civilian wears a hero suit. Tubbo signed putting the bottle down as much as he hated to do it he didn't like not knowing his victims, it didn't feel right.
He moved and checked all pockets of the person looking for any identification of this unknown hero. Tubbo already spent too much time near the crime scene, so looking for an ID was painful and a huge waste of time. Tubbo just decided to kill them and leave before an actual hero comes. Picking up the bottle and positioning it over the hero's chest again, he froze not noticing something like this could have stopped his whole life, hanging around their neck just slightly tucked into the hero's suit was a lanyard that held a very important symbol.
It was a student, a student studying at the most protected and prestigious hero school out there, he threw the bottle down deep into the child's chest the sound of the bones breaking against Tubbo's hand made him wince in disgust, blood sprayed up like a water fountain coating everything in close reach, Tubbo regretted not doing it more carefully cause now he had to get new clothes, and it's the second pair of Ranboo’s clothes he's gotten stained with blood.
If this was a student then that must mean their practising hero watching, that also meant that on the lanyard was a tracker for pro hero's to come and make sure they were alright and I'm pretty sure to a studying hero moving in an alleyway and standing there was a usual thing. Tubbo took the mask off the child's face, standing up he took one last look at the child, emotionless. As good as Tubbo was at lying and covering up for his crimes he never seemed to be able to take emotions. As gross as it was, Tubbo put the mask on covering a good amount of blood and facial identity.
He ran and he ran fast, keeping his head locked onto the ground running anywhere his legs took him.
He ran for at least an hour taking odd turns and keeping his path hard to follow if anyone tried. His legs collided with something bringing him straight down to the ground, he didn't have enough reaction time to be able to bring his hands up to stop the fall. His chin hit the ground taking all air out of his lungs, turning on his back and sitting up he saw what tripped him. A man, a drunk man, a person he wanted to see. This man was black out drunk weirdly because he wasn't near a bar, Tubbo grabbed the brown trench coat pulling it off of the man and wrapping it around himself. The smell of alcohol and cheap men's cologne made Tubbo sick but he had what he needed. He stole the glasses and red beanie off the man putting it all on, he did feel bad for stealing from a drunk man, but he was a robber he does it all the time.

The sun just came up, with about an hour of sleep Tubbo was worried his body would give in, his eyelids and legs were begging to have a rest. He got to the place he was headed to. It took longer to sense he doesn't know the area well. Before he left the house he stole all sorts of jewellery and money he could find shoving it in his pockets. He pushed the doors open walking straight up to the counter "good morning young man, what do you have for us?" The old grandpa looking dude said way too loudly for Tubbous headache, digging his hands in his pockets he put all of the jewellery on the counter "how much you think I can get with this" Tubbo started, the old grandpa looked shocked staring at the expensive pile of jewellery "a break up ay?" He said finally weighing the jewellery one by one.
Tubbo looked confused but decided to roll with it, "yeah-" for some reason in that moment he remembered the tall brunette from the café, that's all Tubbous has been thinking about is the tall male and his stupid pretty eyes. A red tint found its way onto Tubbo's face, glad for the mask the grandpa didn't notice. "Was she pretty?" He asks, glancing at Tubbo while typing in different numbers on his computer.
…
"Yeah," Tubbo answered again.

Chapter Text

Ranboo had just gotten to the cafe when his boss Phil walked out of the shop with the police by his side. Police cars and warning tape where everywhere around the cafe. Phil saw Ranboo and walked up to him, "what happened?" Ranboo was slightly worried looking around at the few heroes and the mass amount of people, either news reporters or just pedestrians. A hero Ranboo couldn't quite recognise came and took Phil to talk to more police.
"A hero student was found dead here this morning in the alley way, we are still waiting to hear more from police and witnesses, back to you Ron" a nearby reporter said.
Ranboo felt sick 'how could someone do that' he walked towards the cafe only to be stopped by another hero. "Stay behind the tape kid" the hero said, placing his hands on the bright yellow tape surrounding the area.
"What happened?" Ranboo was curious now.
The hero shook his head looking distant and disappointed "I can't say, please just back away kid" the raven haired hero said, sounding more demanding now, Ranboo left it alone and backed away. The roads and nearby buildings were blocked off with police cars and hero's, some of the police that weren't around the crime scene were directing people and cars away.
Phil had now walked back out of the crowd.
"It's horrible that some people can do this, I wish the hero's would do more to stop these villains." Phil said when he got to Ranboo, his arms crossed against his chest, his head turned back to the police, Ranboo hummed as if agreeing with the older man. Phil was shorter than Ranboo with short blonde hair and well trimmed beard. Ranboo looked at the paramedics moving a stretcher with a long black bag on it. Their gloves were covered in blood, was the body that fresh?.
"Who found.. it?" Ranboo asked, his voice cracking ever so slightly enough for Phil to put his hand on Ranboo boy's shoulder, now turned to face him.
"It doesn't matter, it'll be okay Ranboo" fore eyes nodded to the reassurance, Phil gave him a soft smile before wandering back off to the police.
He couldn't even bear the thought of it, the sickening smell, the view of white bodysuits and the cover silhouetting a small human. Laid out on the stretcher. He hated death.
He felt sick, very sick.
He walked off towards the other end of the café where no police or people were around. Once he turned the corner now behind a building across from the crime scene, he threw up, falling to his knees, the burning sensation caught in his throat made him wince, the smell of vomit and blood felt in his nostrils. His sweaty hair was moved out the way sticking to the sides of his face. not knowing who did it but he was grateful that he wouldn't have to wash out his hair.
"Rough night?" A voice said nonchalantly behind Ranboo, he chuckled at the remark. Ranboo turned to the side where a shortie was now squatting right next to him, Ranboo stumbled away from the stranger once seeing him "W-Who aRe you" his voice cracked.
"It's me!" The other took off the mask and glasses he was wearing, "from the café" the stranger tilted his head to the side looking at any sign that Ranboo remembered him, until it clicked the cute stranger Ranboo met yesterday 'also borderline kidnapped him' "Aug... nesttt?" Ranboo said, sounding definitely like a question.
"close enough man, Now, are you alright?” ‘Augnest’ said a hint of concern glazed over his eyes.
The rushing feeling of nausea finally came back to Ranboo's attention, he turned his head to the side his hand covering his mouth, acting like that'll stop the flow of bile threatening to come up his throat, Tubbo came closer to Ranboo, steading him with his hand on Ranboo’s shoulder, "it's alright, take it slow" he began to rub comforting circles on Ranboo's back, hoping it'll calm the nausea.

***
Tubbo stood Ranboo up. He seemed lost in his own world so Tubbo ignored him looking behind the taller man, looking everywhere and at everything until my eyes caught on to something green, bright emerald green eyes staring at me. "A Hero" Tubbous said just under his breath he moved, grabbing Ranboo's shirt pulling him closer. He was still zoned out, "Ranboo" no response, Tubbo began panicking looking back at the hero how was now closer a puzzled look on her face, he has discarded the mask and glasses on the ground so now only Ranboo was covering his identity '𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙩'
"Ranboo!" he said louder this time, 'I swear to God if I get caught because this stupid, idiot is daydreaming! I'm actually going to end the earth' "Ranboo!" he looked at Tubbo, 'finally' then he started to back away.
“No stop, don’t move! Someone's coming” Tubbo quickly reached out for his shirt again pulling him closer, way! Closer than before Ranboo put his hands on his shoulders as if trying to save some distance between them,
"what are you doing?" Tubbo ignored him looking back at the hero.
Tubbo was looking for any sign the hero was going to come over here, Ranboo definitely noticed him staring at the hero because Ranboo also tried to look at her, Tubbo definitely did not need her thinking we're suspicious, so he grabbed Ranboo's cheek forcing him to face himself, praying she’ll go away. Ranboo didn't protest or try to pull away, not that Tubbo would let him, his arms were tightly gripped on Ranboo’s arms, Tubbous eyes looked behind Ranboo, the hero had gotten to the edge of the building just temporarily looking away, Tubbo ran, picking up his things, desperate to get away when the hero was distracted.
"Hey! Where are you going?" Ranboo called trying to catch up to Tubbo who just started to run off, he turned the corner before Ranboo could come to his side. But he was gone before Ranboo could blink, nothing. He was gone, he left as fast as he came.
That upset Ranboo.

***

I went to the crime scene, the police and news reporters were just circling the place as well as the people, and stupid influencers. "Sir, how do you feel about going out at night when knowing a killer is on the loose" a woman walked up to me shoving the mic and camera in my face, even if I really wanted to I couldn't talk my face is already on the news people will find out who I am, they don't need to hear my voice. I just signalled to my ears and shook my head, as if signalling that I was deaf. She understood talking to that camera again. "Sir, how do you feel knowing your family could be-" I cut the other news reporter off by doing the same signals.
'fucking hell' I walk away from the news reporters and croud to directly adjacent of the alleyway, I saw police looking around and dusting surfaces with a white powder and people with big white body suits on with clean supplies. "Didn't think you'd show up to your own crime scene, Toxin" a chilling, monotone voice said mocking my 'villain' name. "I don't know why they named me that" annoyance laced my voice.
"People, am I right?" he said, making me chuckle.
"What are you doing here, Alexander I thought you specialised in fighting the 'bad guys' not investigating their crimes" I turned my head to face the hero, his long, pink hair flowing down his back, he wore a red and black tactical attire, with a open back shirt and bullet proof vest for a pair of large orange monarch wings to rest comfortably.
He smirked looking at me "see you finally found a match" he winked,
"What?"
"Oh don't play stupid I saw you two kissing" I blushed, the stupid image of me and Ranboo in the alleyway making its way back into my thoughts, "we weren’t kissing! He was covering me, a hero was coming over" I flustered out a response. "Uhuh" Alex said with no sign of emotion anywhere, "also it’s Monarch to you ‘villain’ well you better leave before they figure out you're here, and I actually don't wanna act like I lost, in a fight with you, just for your benefit" Alexander whined at the thought of that, I just rolled my eyes walking away.
My mind went back to Ranboo, it was scary to think he’ll find out one day, and hate me forever. I tried shaking the thought out of my head only for it to be the only thing I was thinking about.
Scared?
No no I've never felt anything, this weird feeling hurt, I shook my head going to the green car, still parked in the lot.

I walked calmly to the car I left the night before gripping on the car handle pulling the door open. "Uh sir-" I turned around to a police officer "what can I do for you officer?" I asked, pushing the nerves down deep. "This is your car?It was here during the crime scene" I immediately knew what this was. I dug my hands in my pockets acting out the 'cold' weather, while actually feeling around for something I could use. My left hand felt a wallet and a lighter, the other pocket holding a box of cigarettes and paper. "Yeah I figured, quite upsetting isn't it poor girl she was just a child, doesn't get any easier ay, officer?" The nerves started to surface again. I breathed trying to calm my nerves and keep a stable conversation with the man.
"It doesn't, yeah-" the officer looked guilty, like survivor guilt I guess, I honestly never understand gratitude or whatever people called it. How could you care for someone you've never met, actually how could you care for anything. People are like animals; they get birthed, they breed and eventually die. "Now where were you when this whole thing happened" the officer touched a little microphone that sat almost unseeing in his ear, he was recording everything I said. "I went to the pub for dinner last night, just down the street there, and just got back a few hours ago the place was crowded, and I couldn't get past the police until now, I parked here cause of the drunks around there, I didn't want my car broken into and the parking full anyways" I explained every possible question he could ask, pointing down the street towards where I actually found the drunken man on the floor.
I smiled somewhat nicely, "right, can I see your ID?" 'of fucking course he would ask that's I fiddled around in my pockets again re-finding the wallet from before, I really wished the officers was stupid enough not to ask, and now I had to pray to whatever god is out there that this wallet did in fact have an ID. I opened the crusty wallet searching through the mass amount of expired cards until my eyes landed on the all so familiar card. I pulled it out quickly examining the card quickly in case the officer decided that he wanted to do a questioning. I handed him the card "what's your name sir?" He asked, "Well I mean it's on the card, but it's 'William Smith, officer." He seemed to finally believe me, "right, well you have a great afternoon, sir" he handed the card back over, walking past me patting my shoulder in the process "stay safe"
"I will officer, thank you".
As I stepped inside the car, I glanced around and opened the door, settling into the comfortable cushioned seat. I moved around in the small convertible looking for the keys.
“where the fuck did I put them??” I began to get frustrated, pulling at anything that opened. I grabbed the little glasses compartment on the roof of the car, the keys slipped from the box and landed on the floor of the passenger seat, causing me to let out a frustrated groan. I leaned over to grab them struggling to reach, but eventually I managed to grab them with great effort. With the keys in my hand, I fiddled around trying to put the key in the ignition, but eventually, they slid in smoothly.
I looked around the lot staring at people's panic and struggling faces, I glanced over to the rear mirror staring at my own expressionless face. I faced the crowd again picking out a woman with a terrible startled face. She looked faint and sick as she watched the men in white carry an awfully bloody bottle towards a police car, and then glazed back at my own face. I stared for a while trying to imagine such a pained face on my own. I managed a smile. The one expression I have mastered over my years of emptiness, it's hard to lie without expressions. I sighed, turning the key, the car roaring to life. I pulled the seatbelt over me, clicking into place and started to drive out the crowded parking lot, trying not to hit anyone. The place was so packed that I had to make several small turns back and forth. Finally, as I made my way onto the road, I let out a sharp exhale, feeling my dry throat as rough as sandpaper.

Chapter Text

Tubbo drove for a while, until it was dark and the car ran out of fuel. “For fuck sakes” he groaned turning the car off. He was parked on the side of a highway at least 4 hours from LA away from the distraction. And the murders. Tubbo reached over for his phone on the passenger floor, he turned it on and was met with a message.
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Rich Cunt
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*Rich Cunt*
Did you want to come over Saturday? My mother has come for a visit and she wanted to meet you?

*Me*
You told your mother about me??

*Rich Cunt*
It came up in conversation.

*Me*
Right.. Uhh i would but i'm not in LA anymore

*Rich Cunt*
What?! I thought you lived here..
Actually.. that explains why you slept in your car.

*Me*
Yeah

*Rich Cunt*
Where are you going? I know you have no where to sleep other than that car, and you don’t have a Job for money.
You can stay at my house, I have all this room for nothing.

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And that's where his phone died. “... i'm gonna jump” He tossed his phone back to the floor, releasing a sigh and giving up for the night. He made sure the car was locked, and hoped in the back seat getting comfortable before falling into a restless sleep.

Tubbo woke to the blinding light of the sun, and it was freezing, the windows were iced and he’s breath cold. Tubbo pulled his coat over himself, unlocking the car to get out.
“Fucking shit its cold” He complained while shivering. ‘I need to run or something.. Actually I need to find a gas station’ and so he ran. When he was driving he made a left turn going about 3 minutes before he came to a stop, so he just continued running that way.
Tubbo ran for almost an hour before he couldn’t anymore, He slipped like three times because of the snow on the ground.
Stopping for a rest, he spotted a restaurant up ahead. ‘At least this wasn’t for nothing’ he walked this time, to the place. Pioneer Saloon was what it was called, it looked very southern, he pushed the wooden doors open with a bell sounding. He walked in being met with tables and a bar, country music playing softly on the speakers.
A burly man stood behind the bar with a long beard and ponytail in, he was wiping a glass before he looked up and saw Tubbo. Behind the bar were like 100 bottles of different alcohol and above them were… bras all hung up, some had tassels, some had boobs on them and old granny ones too, Tubbo immediately looked away.
“Sorry son, but we’re not open yet” it took like two consecutive business days for the gears in Tubbo’s head to turn, to realise he was being spoken to.
“Oh sorry, um, no my car ran out of petrol and I just needed some petrol and this is like the first place I saw, so um.” Tubbo fiddled with his hands trying to keep his eyes off the bras
“You’re not from here, are you?” He spoke with a southern accent.
“No, sir”
“ ‘no, suh’ I like that, formal and yeah I can tell, you’r accent is different, France?” this pained Tubbo, not only because ‘France’? It’s French.. the man smiled, grabbing a glass “21?” he asked another question, pouring an orange liquid into the glass.
“Spain, sir, and no, I'm 20” Tubbo moved closer, defeating his fear of bras. The man gave the glass to Tubbo. Like he didn’t care that it was illegal.
“Spain? Like spanish.. So you’re from Mexico” This physically hurt Tubbo. His eye twitched. He grabbed the drink having a sip trying to pretend the whisky didn’t taste like complete shit.
“No spain”
“No such thing, there's the USA, Europe, France and Chinese and Asian. Their the only countries, except Canada and Mexico but their like basically North America” he grabbed the glass Tubbo finished and cleaned it with the wet rag. ‘Perfect, he’s retarded, classic American’ his thoughts were interrupted,
“Which way did you come from?” Tubbo pointed back in the direction he came from. “Oh, son the gas station was at that turn” now Tubbo felt like the retarded American. “Here how about I drive you to it and then to your car so you can get on going, cause it is cold and a 3 hour walk” He put his things down already going to walk out the bar. When he was at the door, Tubbo grabbed the man's wallet that he just casually left, shoving it in his pocket.
Tubbo followed him to a dusty blue ute, the man smacked the hood of the car. “My joy this one is” he kissed the car, Tubbo looked away like his dad was doing something horribly embarrassing. “Coming?” he turned back, the man hopping into the ute.
Tubbo hopped into the car, looking at all his surroundings before he closed the door. “So where are we?”
“Good old’ GoodSprings, Nevada bout’ 30 minutes from Las Vegas, by car” he turned the car on going back down the road Tubbo ran from. Nevada?? How far did I go’
“How far is that from LA?”
“Uhhh 3 hours? I’m Randy” he looked confused, probably because Tubbo had no fucking clue where he was and he was ‘france’.
“Uh, Davidd” Tubbo said, adding a ‘France’ accent before he started going on, how that's American and how Tubbo was France and whatever, doesn’t matter. Tubbo looked more around the car looking inside the trailer part, finding 3 shotguns, rope, and other hardware tools in the back. He reached down the side, finding exactly what someone with 3 shotguns and doesn't know geometry would have. He left the object alone for now. They drove for 5 minutes when they saw the stolen green car.
“That your car David?" Randy slowed driving next to it.
“Yeah”
“Hey, you know you sound familiar, are you from one of them picture films?” Randy asked, looking amazed like he could imagine the ‘awesome’ movies Tubbo could’ve been in. Tubbo just shook his head.
Randy sped up, reaching the gas station in less than 3 minutes. Tubbo hopped out, entering the gas station and purchasing a petrol bottle and walking back to the ute with a bag of chips and less than 45 cents. He tossed the bottle in the back staring for a minute at the shotguns.

Tubbo hopped back in the ute, his hand drifting over the edge of the seat, the object was in a pocket of the car door completely hidden, unless you knew where to find it. “All good?” Randy smiled, pulling out of the car park and back up the road to GoodSprings.
“Perfect” Tubbo’s face went blank. Watching the road out in front of them.
Randy pulled over just behind Tubbo's car. “Okay let's get this running!” Randy spoke so enthusiastically it almost hurt to pull the pistol from the pocket, switching the safety off and pointing the firearm directly at Randy’s trachea. Almost.. Randy turned in horror to the sound of the gun, in the corner of Tubbo’s eye he caught sight of a polaroid picture taped to his sun visor, it was a picture of two blonde girls about the same age, with writing on the blank part, ‘my gorgeous girls’. A sudden gurgling noise came from Randy.
Tubbo had fired the gun.
Blood splattered everywhere colouring the windows red, it soaked into his shirt, and sprayed all over Randy until he grabbed his own neck, to stop the flow. Tubbo stared at his horrified looking face, he tried to scream out, but all that came out was an agonising gurgle, he kicked and tried to hurt Tubbo just realising it was no use. He coughed, choking on his own bodily fluids, it pouring out of his mouth. While tears streamed down his face, Randy glanced over to the polaroid letting go of his neck to reach for it while the light drained from his eyes. Tubbo fired another shot this time for the head. Randy went limp.
“It’s okay. Here” Tubbo grabbed the polaroid, placing it in his hands. “They're always with you,” Tubbo smiled, hopping out the car.
He took the pistol putting the safety on, putting it in his pocket while he hastily move grabbing the petrol bottle and filling his car up, grabbing the shotgun with the most amount of bullets, he opened the car door again meeting a strong smell of iron, Tubbo grabbed a phone charger, and closed the door.
He unlocked the car and got in immediately putting the key in the ignition and starting the car, it roared to life.
Tubbo was back on the road, he drove in the other direction towards GoodSprings. About 5 minutes out of the town he passed by another car, and he pressed on the gas. That person was gonna have a pleasant surprise. He put his phone on charge now driving back to Los Angeles, when he looked up multiple police and ambulance cars raced past sirens blaring. Tubbo turned the radio on. A man's voice spoke
‘A 47 year old father and widower; Randy Summit, was found dead in his car, near GoodSprings, Nevada, just south from Las Vegas. Brian Hopps and his wife were going for lunch at Pioneer Saloon, being met with an empty bar. So they left, when they were driving down the road, they were met with a horrific scene.’
The voice changed to that of Texan man
“It was just terrible, mah wife she just screamed, the blood, it was just everywhere the windows were red” The voice changed to middle age female reporter
‘Well, uh I’m here at the scene and it’s just horrible a-and looking back at the paramedics there's just blood everywhere, such a... fresh body…….’
The reporter just stopped talking, it switched back to the man ‘Could this be connected to the murders throughout Phoenix and the more recent consecutive murders in Los Angeles and is this caused by the most notable named villain ‘Toxin’? We’ll find out later today’ Tubbo turned the radio back off, the reporter was stuttering when she was trying to talk about the murder, he tried to imagine. Thinking, what about that scene could leave someone so speechless. Tubbo just kept driving, after a few minutes he remembered the chips he got and took a rest stop at a park. Tubbo sat in his car with the door open playing on his phone that he charged on the way there.

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Rich Cunt
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*Rich Cunt*
You can stay at my house, I have all this room for nothing.
---

Tubbo?

*me*
Sorry my phone died
Yeah I'm coming back to LA, see you there.

*Rich Cunt*
You’ll live with me?
Yay!
I’ve always wanted a roommate.

*me*
Okay man.
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Tubbo was so curious how Ranboo could be so happy about such little, pathetic things, he wanted to experience that emotion. His heart was empty and black, Ranboo’s was bright and full of life, Tubbo clenched his chest.
Finishing the chips, he threw the rubbish in the bin. Hopping back into the car, he turned the radio back on while he was pulling out of the car park.
“I think it's just horrific like how in the right mind will do that to a person! That Monster committing these murders are F*beep*g mental!” said the voice on the radio, it sounded like a teenage boy, Tubbo felt judged. ‘A word from Randy’s 22 year old daughter’ Tubbo instinctively raised the volume, after hearing the man's voice that same man from last time, it switched to the voice of a southern woman, she was upset.
“My father Randy Summit was a good man, he cared about everyone, always offering and giving and never taking, a-and what happened to him was just unforgivable and unfair!” she took a deep breath “my mother died when me and my sister were just 3 so he had to raise us at the age of 20, with no help. He worked 2 jobs to provide us with food and an education, and never once have I ever heard him complain. He always showed up for my soccer games, not once missing one, coming on his breaks and even taking a day off which left him with no money to feed himself. And he brought all the art supplies for my sister. And to have our only family member taken away from us I- I can't even” she broke down crying, Tubbo stared straight ahead. “And to the person who killed my father in cold blood, I hope you know I will show no mercy!!” Tubbo changed the channel to listen to music, while he made his way back to Los Angeles.

Entering LA it was about 4pm, Tubbo was exhausted from having a horrible sleep and running for an hour straight. He parked the car, realising that he subconsciously drove to the cafe. Looking inside he caught a glimpse of the attractive barista, handing a coffee cup to a customer smiling sweetly, even when the person purposely grabbed his hand. “If you're gonna flirt with someone at least don’t make it weird” Tubbo whispered to himself, thinking about how funny it would be to do it to Ranboo, as a joke.. Tubbo realises that he should at least take off the coat covered in blood, he shoves it under the passenger's seat. He looked in the mirror on the sun visor wiping any visible blood off and then wondered how he wasn’t pulled over for having blood all over him. He hopped out the car, locking it behind him as he walked into the pink building. Tubbo walked to the counter.
“Hello! What can I get y-... Tubbo?” Ranboo rested his hands on the counter checking behind Tubbo for anyone waiting behind him, which there weren’t.
“You sound surprised, I told you I was coming back?”
“I assumed you were further out. You told me that an hour ago”
Tubbo looked at the clock on the wall. “Yeah, I was already driving back, and I only went to Nevada” he hoped Ranboo hadn’t seen the news again because seeing himself covered in blood and then on another occasion coming back from a place a murder happened wouldn’t be good, and he liked Ranboo as much as he did Tommy. He didn’t want to do that again.
“Oh uh well do you want something anyways?” Ranboo smiled, a bit differently than he did with that other customer.
“Yeah a coffee please” Tubbo grabbed out Randy’s wallet that he also forget he had, opening it he saw a different polaroid of his daughters and right next to it an old portrait picture of a young women, she was smiling, in the small border it wrote ‘Wouldn’t replace you with the world’, Tubbo pulled out a $20 bill handing it to Ranboo, he gladly took it.
“If you find a seat I'll join you, my break is gonna start” Ranboo went to go make the coffee before Tubbo could answer, so he just went to sit down at a window seat watching the cars go by.

“Tubbo” Tubbo shot awake hadn’t realised he nodded off.
“Tired?” Ranboo sat in front of Tubbo with a coffee in one hand and a book in the other, he handed the coffee to Tubbo, which he immediately started to drink, pulling down the mask.
“It’s hot!” Ranboo yelped a bit too late, Tubbo's tongue was on fire and his eyes started to water as he set the drink down. He slammed his head on the table, wiping his eyes. Ranboo sighed, patting his head then returned it back to his book. Tubbo wiped the tears away and laid there nodding off again.
“Did you think about my offer? I assumed, because you came back you’ve decided.” Tubbo closed his eyes. ‘Living with him?’ He didn't know what he should do, it would be nice having a bed to sleep on, but it’s the exact same situation with Tommy.
“No” Tubbo lifted his head, grabbing the coffee and taking the lid off, blowing off the steam.
“Why not?” Ranboo took his eyes off the book he was reading.
“Romeo and Juliet?” Ranboo looked confused, he looked down and hid the book under the table, his face turning red.
“Its for uni-” he looked away, staring at the passing cars, maybe if he stared hard enough one would crash through the store and kill them both spontaneously. That didn’t happen.
“Right..” Tubbo smirked and reached for it under the table, Ranboo wasn’t paying attention. He was still facing the window, but with his eyes closed. His mouth was moving but no sound came out. Silently praying or something. Tubbo grabbed the book, ripping it from Ranboo's hands, he pushed off the ground the chair screeching backwards, away from the table.
“Tubbo!” Ranboo turned back, lent over the table, reaching for the book, but finding it out of reach. He gave up silently crying in his hands. Tubbo chuckled while opening the book; some of the pages had sticky notes all different colours, he opened the page on the balcony scene, some of the dialogue was highlighted in a pastel pink, a purple sticky note stuck on the page; ‘i hate how much i love them, type of romance you wish you got’ Tubbo flipped the pages to the scene where Juliet wakes up and finds him dead another sticky note; ‘every good romance ends in death’ Tubbo stared at that one for a while.
“I know it's childish but you don't have to judge me that hard!!” Ranboo cried, going to grab the book again, Tubbo laughed moving his chair back again, it made a harsh screeching noise against the ground.
“I’m not judging you! It’s sweet” Ranboo huffed, sitting back in his seat with his arms crossed, Tubbo screeched his chair back leaning over the table. “So you want me to speak shakespearean while you watch from your, like, 5 story balcony?” Ranboo snatched the book back, shoving Tubbo’s face away from his own.
“Shut up” Tubbo chuckled, sitting back and drinking his coffee that had cooled by then “my house isn’t that big anyways” Tubbo lifted his eyebrows, setting his coffee down. He looked at Ranboo like ‘really’
“okey its a bit big… okey its fucking massive and way to big for one person, even when my mum’s there” he rephrased after seeing Tubbo’s unimpressed face. “I don’t like big open spaces anyways.. I just thought if someone else was there permanently then it would feel less lonely, and small and insignificant” Ranboo picked at his cuticles.
“I’ll live with you” Ranboo's head shot straight up. He pulled apart Tubbo's hands holding them. Ranboo smiled brightly, pulling Tubbo's hands to his chest as he leaned over the table.
“That's fantastic, Je suis tellement excité, c'est tellement génial, j'ai hâte!!” Tubbo shot him a confused look but just ignored it after realising he was just showing his excitement even in French. He smiled and he actually felt it in his heart, it was a bit more than the practice smile he’s learnt to master at such a young age.

Chapter Text

Tubbo went home with Ranboo, in Tubbo’s car. “I can't believe you can’t drive,” Tubbo exclaimed out loud upon entering the house, moments before Ranboo had uncovered the wild truth of not having a car. Ranboo ignored him, putting his things down. It was 6pm. Ranboo had finished his shift just before the snow started to fall, coating the ground with ice and the trees lost their last leaves.
“I can't believe it’s snowing” Ranboo countered, he looked out the window, admiring the small snowflakes hit the ground. A memory plagued Tubbo’s head.

“¡Mami! Está nevando” A young version of Tubbo about 6 clinged to the window seal jumping up and down, a vague image of a tall woman, with long auburn hair. Walked over to Tubbo, and held him gently over the shoulders, crouching down to his level. He couldn't hear her but her mouth moved, she smiled, stood up and held Tubbo’s hand watching the snowfall outside the window.

The flashback swept away like a cool breeze, Tubbo wiped away the tears streaming down his face, Ranboo still stood at the window. Tubbo clutched his chest, his heart pounding and his breath quickened. He ran up the stairs turning the corner into the guest bedroom, the same one Ranboo took him to a week ago. He struggled to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. Tubbo slid down the door, breathing heavily. Reaching up he grabbed his hair tugging at it, pulling out strands, he kicked, hoping the burning sensation plaguing deep in his chest would go away. He released his hair with one hand punching his chest, his chest felt like a hollow cavern, he felt the hit vibrate through his body, he punched again and again and again, until he was coughing. The sensation disappeared, leaving only a bruised burning on his chest. He focused on the pain, his breathing stilled. He dug his nails into his arms as he stood up and stared at himself in the mirror. His face was dark, the tears had stopped. Tubbo took his shirt off, his chest was red, and it started to turn green and purple. He rubbed it, the bruise throbbed as his fingers dragged along it.
“Tubbo?” a soft knock, sounded on the door. Tubbo ignored it, turning the shower on to burning, the steam filled the room, he couldn’t see himself in the mirror anymore. He undressed and hoped in, it burnt turning his skin red raw, the bruise on his chest throbbed. He knelt to the floor clutching his legs holding them. Tubbo just sat there listening to Ranboo incoherently, talking outside the door. The door unlocked, and a figure walked inside the room. The curtain on the shower was drawn so all he could see was a dark figure lit up by the outside light. He realised how dark it was. “Are you okey?” Ranboo asked, kneeling to the floor. Tubbo touched the curtain outlining the figure's shape, drawing a heart on his chest. Ranboo sighed, turning around and sitting against the tub.
The water ran down the curtain, he watched as the drops of water fell down landing inside the tub. He wondered how long it would take to fill the tub, and collectively how long it would take for Tubbo to drown in the water, perhaps 20 minutes 40? He pushed those thoughts away, leaning against the cold tile wall still staring at the figure in front of him. Unlike Tommy he felt weird towards Ranboo, and unlike everyone else he felt comfortable around Tommy but Ranboo? He couldn’t understand it. He hated how his heart flared like a spark of light ignited inside of him, making him shine a faint glow, and he definitely hated how his face warmed up around him, despite the cold weather.
After a few more minutes, Ranboo had left the room and came back shortly after to leave a pair of shorts and a shirt neatly folded on the counter, before leaving the room again and closing the door behind him. Tubbo turned the shower off and hopped out into the intensely colder room than it had previously been in the sanctuary of being under heated water and behind a shower curtain, blocking out the cruel cold. He quickly dried himself off and dressed, his chest throbbed rudely whenever the fabric just briefly brushed against his skin, he winced, opening the cupboards hopefully finding at least a roll of bandages. “How the hell does this bastard not have a single medical supply” Tubbo complained, throwing his arms down, regrettable, a shock of pain sliced through him making him groan in agony. He cursed himself for having one of those painful flashbacks, and carefully walked out of the bathroom making no sudden movements. Ranboo was nowhere to be found, but he seemed to have left a glass of water on Tubbo's now nightstand. He gratefully drowned the drink, it soothing the pain in his throat. As he put the glass back down, he keeled over sideways, collapsing against the mattress, and passing out.

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Tubbo ran for what seemed like forever, his legs were covered in mud and wet grass. The fire in his legs seemed to only get hotter, his body screaming for a rest. His eyes were burning from the cold and blurry from the constant tears streaming down his face. He couldn’t scream any longer, his lungs burning and barely even getting enough oxygen in. The world faded for a second and Tubbo felt himself being lifted off the ground, before meeting it with a painful screech. He cried out screaming out in agony his body trembled and kicked and punched the ground and the air. He couldn’t control his mind and body, they both acted on autopilot. His lungs stopped working and he couldn’t breathe. Twisting around so he could lean on his arms, he stopped screaming, taking hoarse and deep inhales, he kept thinking how his mother used to help him with these types of panic attacks. He gripped his hair, the comforting thought being overshadowed by what he had done, he propped himself up on his arms, he screamed but he couldn’t get rid of the terrifying thought the scene flashed in his eyes making him relive it over and over again.
“MAMÁ” he wheezed out, his voice hoarse and barely a whisper, he was hopeful, like his mother would reach out to him, and take away the pain. But that couldn’t happen. He punched his chest, not being able to hold himself up with one trembling arm, he fell straight on his face, the pain spread through his body. He pulled himself up off the snow peering down at the blood that dripped from his face. Tubbo sat up looking down at his blood splattered clothes, the blood wasn’t his. He winced, crying out except this time no sound came out, his ears rang. Tubbo reached up to where his mouth would be, all that was left was a healed suture line like his mouth had been sewed together. His eyes widened in a panic, and his heartbeat raced; it felt like it would explode.

“Would we be friends forever?” A young voice asked, Tubbo was in a playground facing a swing where two children were sitting on the swings next to each other. The one who spoke was a young boy about 10, he was blonde with a relatively baby face for a 10 year old, he had deep brown eyes. Tubbo panic dissipated; he looked around confused, and then reached up to his mouth; it was there but when he tried to speak nothing came out, his heart skipped a beat.
“Of course we would be” the other boy swinging next to him, smiled sweetly. He had jet black hair and striking green eyes, he spoke like english was his second language. It was Tubbo, a young version of Tubbo.
Older, current Tubbo raised his eyebrows, looking at himself in what felt like real time was definitely a surreal experience. Tubbo on the swings was about 11, his eyes tainted with trauma, and completely a void of emotion.
The blonde boy, who older Tubbo recognised as Tommy, reached out to hold his young version of himself’s hand. “Good” he spoke, swinging slowly with young Tubbo's hand in his.
The image dissolved a new one forming. Tubbo reconised that as the first time he met Tommy, after running away from the foster home he was in at the time. And the time Tommy’s dad let him stay with them. He smiled remembering that memory, his heart glowed. Like actually; the veins in Tubbo's skin glowed a dim yellow before plaguing red, his skin broke where his veins were cutting into exposed wounds, starting from his hands, feet and head all heading in the direction of his heart, he could see it pounding in his chest glowing brighter and brighter. His open veins reached his heart. Nothing happened, but his heart stopped moving and he felt it, then it began dimming and turning a deep crimson red. Suddenly his heart exploded like a bullet going through a water balloon, he yelped out in alarm, his vision going red. The image around him solidified through a red lens.

His Mother sat on a rocking chair staring deadly into Tubbo, her face was pale and void of all and any emotion. “Ahora sonríes” she spoke softly, a crooked grin spreading across her face, he thought it was scary before his mothers face lit up like she was the embodiment of a ray of sunshine and her smile evened out; flashing her brilliant smile. Just as he was getting comfortable. Her jaw dropped straight on her lap, her mouth becoming inhuman wide, her eyes poured a black liquid. Her once brilliant teeth became razor thin and sharp, like an angular fish. Tubbo screamed kicking to get up and away from her, but he wouldn’t move. The figure launched herself at him, terror shot through his body. The monster screamed.
“WAKE UP”

/////////

“réveillez-vous! Tubbo, s’il te plaît!”
Tubbo's eyes shot straight open and took a deep breath like he hadn’t had an ounce of oxygen for years. Ranboo stood over him, spitting out frustration and confused French. Tubbo looked over at Ranboo once he caught his breath, but when he looked, the distorted monster that shifted his mother in the dream infected his vision, it stretched, jumping at him. Tubbo yelped, throwing his arms up, landing a nasty punch on Ranboo's face.
“Ough, fuck! Ça fait mal.. Ouch. what the fuck is with you, first your screaming in your sleep and now you’re punching me” Ranboo recoiled, stumbling backwards holding his nose, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.
“Sorry.” Tubbo sat up, the figure was gone. “I had a nightmare” Ranboo gave him a look of pain.
“real aggressive nightmare” Ranboo wiped his nose and checked his hand. Deciding he was okay; he looked up, studying the other's face. Ranboo just couldn’t figure this guy out, he was charming and scary and now awfully traumatised and violent when he dreams. ‘Maybe this was why he didn’t have a house’ Ranboo tried to imagine the amount of noise complaints the guy would get, then he thought that was mean and sent Tubbo an apology in his head. Tubbo did not respond.
“Are you okay?” Ranboo moved to sit on the bed next to Tubbo but he stood when Ranboo sat down, he frowned.
“Yeah fine” they had now swapped spots, and Ranboo felt like he was the one screaming bloody murder at four in the morning. He caught a brief moment where Tubbo's face scrunched up in pain, but it was gone before he could have a proper look. Tubbo rested a hand against his chest lightly rubbing the area.
“Where’d you get those?” Ranboo asked. Tubbo's face twisted in confusion, tilting his head.
“What?”
“That on your arm.. Arms” Ranboo made plural, trying to nod his head in two directions at each of Tubbo's arms which just made him look like some sort of disoriented woodpecker. Tubbo lifted his arm getting a look at the scratches along both of his arms, he crossed his arms the scratches lining up perfectly to his nails. He quickly dropped them. Ranboo grimaced, watching Tubbo turn away from him, grabbing the empty glass on his nightstand and walking out of the room leaving Ranboo alone with his thoughts.
“What the fuck, have I gotten myself into” Ranboo flopped onto the bed staring at the faded glow in the dark stars stuck to the roof much to high and dim to make out the shape but he connected the dots together with his arm raised to the roof. Tubbo re-entered the room, now with a hoodie on.
“Where’d you get that?” Ranboo asks, pointing accusingly at Tubbo.
“I found your room”
“Are you just going to steal my clothes?”
Tubbo shrugged
“Didn’t you bring anything?”
Tubbo took a sip from the glass now filled to the brim with water.
“I have a small bag in my car, no jumpers tho” Tubbo admitted, setting the glass down. Ranboo sighed, raising his hands to his eyes, sending a silent prayer to the heavens. Tubbo frowned, “you’re on my bed” he walked over standing over the french man. Ranboo looked up disapprovingly.
“Actually this is my bed, I paid for it” Ranboo grinned, looking proud at himself like he said the best comeback known to man. Tubbo began getting annoyed, knocking Ranboo's knees with his own, before full on attacking him. Ranboo screamed out trying to push the rabid dog off of him, his laughter filled the room. “AA stop, get off!!” he squirmed trying to get out of the hold. Tubbo had him in a tight hug holding his arms down, aggressively poking his side, Tubbo was surprisingly strong for such an anemic looking guy. The two adult sized kids rolled off the bed, in a fit of hysteria, Ranboo finally managed to get out of his grip and tackled Tubbo to the ground, Tubbo barked out in alarm, trying to pull Ranboo off but finding it hard to catch the rat. Ranboo giggled, rolling Tubbo over, finding it so very funny he was just bullying Tubbo. “Come on get up!” Ranboo laughed when Tubbo tried to grab him but was just being rolled over.
“Damn you!” Tubbo threatened, spreading his arms out like a bird.. Which did nothing but hurt his elbow, Tubbo had just been ready to give up and accepted his fate for being a tumbleweed the rest of his life, before his back hit a solid wall. ‘Thank god for walls’ Ranboo cried out, crawling away while giggling like a little kid.
“Uhh excuse me!” Tubbo reached as far as he could grabbing ahold of Ranboo's leg, he yelled out in protest, as Tubbo yanked Ranboo back.
“Ouch” he laughed, tears swelling in his eyes, he laid on his back. The carpet had pulled Ranboo's shirt up and his hair was horribly messy, Tubbo almost laughed at the sight if it weren’t for the fact Ranboo was already laughing, flashing a gorgeous smile. Tubbo felt a flutter in his stomach, and he stopped to look away.
“Heeh he” Ranboo wheezed, wiping the tears from his eyes. He laid there for a while catching his breath.
“Right, well i'm going back to bed” Tubbo pushed off the ground not once making eye contact. Ranboo rolled his eyes but watched as Tubbo hid under the sheets. His heart was pounding and he couldn’t help but love the warm feeling in his chest. He sat up pulling his shirt back down, he was gonna feel that carpet burn later.
Ranboo left quietly, sneaking a glance at the mound of blankets. “Good night, roomie,” Tubbo groaned, but Ranboo just smiled. He's been waiting a while to let that one slip.

Tubbo woke around 6am the light shining through the curtain, a dreamless 1 hour nap was just exactly what this sleep deprived psychopath needed to start his day, after a plural amount of nightmares. Tubbo dragged himself out of bed, more like crawled and then fell straight on his face but no one was watching, so that didn’t happen. Tubbo walked down the hall immediately forgetting where he was. If you’ve ever been in the halls of ‘Palace of Versailles’ , Ranboo's house was just like it.. Kindoff maybe less gold, it was white with blue everywhere a light blue, meaning blue chairs, the pillars and designs in the wall looked like they were highlighted with the same type of baby blue. It made the whole place seem unreal and soft? If that was a way to describe it. and the roof was not covered in massive art pieces but still had the same sort of engravings. The whole House was like 80% hallways straight and never seemed to end, 10% grand staircases the remaining 10% is like what a person needs in their home but doubled. They're at least two of the same thing like kitchens, dining rooms, lounge rooms and et cetera, and every bedroom was an ensuite, which was fair, seeming every room was like miles apart.
Tubbo looked around, everything was clean which was surprising because Ranboo was the only one that lived here, before himself of course, did Ranboo spend his free time cleaning?. That didn’t surprise Tubbo.
To the right of his room was a grand white staircase, the railings pillars the same baby blue, highlighted with gold. Tubbo felt small and like he didn’t belong, something about this house made him feel lonely and depressed. He took a sigh and walked down the turning staircase.
The bottom of the staircase was ‘surprise you guessed it’ another hallway, this one horizontal to the stairs and was darker than it was upstairs. He remembered the massive doors from the first time he was here nearly a week ago and took the first right, The massive dark, double doors opened by themselves revealing a dining room. Ranboo sat at one end, the rising sun highlighted his face, he looked almost gorgeous in the orange light. Ranboo had his head resting on his left hand, the other holding a spoon mindlessly stirring the soggy cereal. The doors shut, but Ranboo didn’t look up.
“Good morning” Tubbo called, making his way around the table, Ranboo continued to stir the cereal like he didn’t hear Tubbo. “Hola?” Tubbo touched Ranboo's shoulder sending a cold shiver down his spine, Ranboo looked up almost surprised.
“Ola?” Ranboo countered, sleep lasing his voice making the french accent more difficult to understand. Tubbo pulled the chair out, on Ranboo's right and sat down, basking in the sunlight.
“Hola.” Tubbo corrected, then tilted his head at Ranboo's confusion.
“I thought you were Americano” Ranboo put his hands under the table. His accent made the question sound more like ‘I thout yu weare emericano’ which made Tubbo pause in confusion.
“Uh no- I was born in Spain” he hoped Ranboo knew what country that was, but he just gasped and his eyes widened.
“We share borders” his accent loosened making it easier to understand but it still came out like ‘we sare boders’.
Tubbo hadn’t thought about how close they would’ve been all their lives. “What year did you move?” Given the timing, Ranboo and Tubbo would’ve always been a few hours away from each other, that gave an unsettling feeling to Tubbo.
“In 2012, I moved because my dad got an acting opportunity in Hollywood” Ranboo sounded bored of the fact, like the mention of his dad was annoying.
“I moved to Arizona in 2010” Tubbo was surprised how close the time was.
“Also a border apart” Ranboo recognises, sounding genuinely astonished. Ranboo chuckled while eating a spoonful of cereal. Ranboo and Tubbo have been basically right next to each other their whole lives.
“Where were you born?” Tubbo blurted out.
Ranboo answered after another mouthful of cereal “France? Montpellier” Tubbo tested his geological knowledge but couldn’t figure out where that was. “And you?” Ranboo interrupts his thoughts.
“Valencia” Tubbo answered, Ranboo thought for a moment, eating about half his cereal before replying.
“We’re both on the coast, about a 7 hour drive apart” Ranboo nodded his eyes wide. Tubbo sat back in his chair. “Everyone is always connected,” Ranboo noted, continuing to eat his cereal, when his phone chimed. Ranboo picked it up briefly before placing it back on the table upside down. Tubbo tilted his head in confusion.
“My boss wants me to come in to work, today” Ranboo answered the question on Tubbo's mind.
Tubbo only nodded
“Oh! My maman is coming today, remember” Ranboo smiled, finishing the last of his cereal and looking at Tubbo well, more like the hem of Tubbo’s shirt. Tubbo realised how much he hated making eye contact. He stared at the charms in Ranboo's hair.
“Uh” Tubbo didn’t know what he should do, the only reason he’s even living with Ranboo is not only because he’s broke without a house and on the run but because Ranboo clearly never seen even a bit of news ever, there wasn’t even a single tv in the house. What should he do about Ranboos’s mother? Should he meet her? Maybe she was as closed off to the world as her son was? “I don’t know”
Confusion plastered on Ranboo's face “what do you mean” Ranboo scratched his head.
“What is she like?” Tubbo ignored him.
“Uhh she's really nice and makes a really good L’île Flottante, uhh she’s also a news reporter. She’s in Las Vegas right now actually for work and wanted to stop by before she goes to Wisconsin.” Ranboo rambled but Tubbo could feel his heart fall straight to the bottom of his stomach. ‘She just had to be a news reporter didn’t she’ Tubbo sent a silent ‘fuck you’ to fate. “She’s my only source of news really. After my papa cheated on my maman and moved back to France, a while ago. It hurts to see him.. my papa shows up too often on tv so I stopped watching it.” Ranboo sounded upset rather than mad, which made Tubbo wonder if the affair was the only bad thing he’d done.
“Look as much as I would love to meet your mother I really have to go back to Arizona” Ranboo looked hurt, disappointed and just confused like he had been this whole conversation.
“What?”
“I’m going to visit.. A family member. I have too”
Ranboo looked a bit disappointed but he nodded
“I'm sorry”
Ranboo waved a hand dismissively. “Well actually maybe you can see my mother on the way out.” Ranboo smiled, turning to face the garden outside. Tubbo followed his gaze out the window. The garden was beautiful in the orange light, some of the flowers were starting to bloom in the warmth of the sun. “If you don’t need to leave straight away” he added, Tubbo turned back, Ranboo still looked out the window, his face lit golden. Tubbo looked down at his hands, his hands were calloused, the nail beds chewed.
Tubbo didn’t think, and ended up muttering an answer “alright, i'll see her on the way out” Tubbo had started to pick at the skin surrounding his nails, Ranboo grabbed his hand just holding it as the birds flew by out the window. A crow landed on the window seal with a worm in its mouth. Ranboo's face stayed perfectly still, as he faced Tubbo. He smiled as he saw Tubbo eyeing the bird who was now watching them intensely with its beady little eyes.
“What? Believe in bad luck?” Ranboo sounded interested. Tubbo hesitantly looked at Ranboo who still held his hand and was still beautiful in the golden light, then he got mad at himself for thinking that. Tubbo grimaced, turning back towards the crow as she devoured her worm.
“I'm pretty sure it’s harmony to bad luck, they really just symbolise death, like the latin saying ‘memento mori’” Tubbo turned to face Ranboo whose face twisted in an odd way. The crow flew off squawking as it took flight.
“What does that mean?”
“Memento mori? .. it basically means ‘remember you must die’, puritan settlers were afraid of what death might mean so they put it on tombstones for the living, like a reminder that it must happen and that it's okay” Tubbo shrugged. Ranboo frowned, his eyebrows knitting together.
“That's sad”
“Not really, everyone dies one way or another, it's a part of life. You don’t appreciate life if it never ends” Tubbo’s face stayed perfectly neutral even after Ranboo had pulled his hand away and wiped it on his jeans. They sat there in silence for a while before Ranboo said he had to go to work and said he would be back at one, to meet his mother.

Tubbo wandered the halls looking for something to do, everything looked the same, it was all fancy and highlighted with a baby blue. Tubbo guessed he found it weird because Ranboo never wore blue and his room was completely devoid of blue, then he remembered his dad brought it and that Ranboo didn’t. Tubbo walked into a hall full of family portraits, one in particular caught his eye. It was a massive painted photo, a gorgeous dark woman, with long curly brown hair, sitting on a chair on the left. She wore a stunning baby blue dress that slightly reminded Tubbo of a jellyfish. Standing next to her was a middle aged french man with a luxurious moustache, and clean cut jet black hair, he wore a vest under a tailored dark blue suit, with a cape resting over his left shoulder. The man had his hand resting on a young Ranboo’s right shoulder, Ranboo stood next to his mother both his hand resting on her dress where knees should be. He wore a white button up with a frilly cravat and gold pin holding in place, he smiled brightly. The painting was old and the only thing collecting dust, the most peculiar thing about it was the slash through the man's face on canvas like someone threw an axe at it, Tubbo guessed that was Ranboo's father. The painting had a cut running down vertically cutting off Ranboo from his mother but it looked to have been stitched back together messily with a light blue stitch.
Tubbo ran his fingers over the stitching, noticing the amount of dust that was coming off the canvas. It must have been only put up recently from laying down where the dust had surface to land on. One more thing that caught his eye was behind the man on a table was a bird cage with a small crow sitting on a piece of wood, Tubbo shivered, tearing his eyes off the painting and continuing to walk down the hall. He’s not scared of birds, death or bad luck. He just hates when it's right. Tubbo could feel the facade fading, the perfectly placed mask that covers his face cracked, pieces falling away. Tubbo had a habit of going back to old ways, stone cold face, eyes a void. He dragged his finger along the wall looking at each framed picture; pictures of young Ranboo, his parents, of a dog and anything resembling a nice childhood, other than the countless pictures of Ranboo’s mother looking sick and messy makeup covering patches and discoloration on the skin, Ranboo also looked more distracted the older that he got, the dog stopped showing up at Ranboo’s side. It was disturbing, like Tubbo was delving into something beyond himself and it was thrilling.
At the end of the hall was a dark blue door, it stood out against the pale complexion of the walls. Tubbo twisted the handle, opening the door into a beautiful bedroom, everything was a pale or baby blue.
“I guess whoever lived in here made the colour choices of the house” Tubbo whispered aloud. The chandelier glittered, casting rainbows all over the room in the sunlight, it was gorgeous. Looking around the room, Tubbo found that a lot of the furniture was scratched and patched up, like a wild animal was let loose and someone just cleaned up the aftermath. More family photos and painted portraits hung on the wall, some laid up against the wall behind a blue chair, the glass was broken. Tubbo pulled the chair away revealing an odd sight a framed photo on Ranboo’s father holding a baby has been slashed the glass broken, the shards that still remained wedged in the wood frame had dents like someone tried stabbing it multiple times finally breaking through right in the baby's face, old bits of blood splattered over the painting and bits on the glass shards. Tubbo imagined someone pulling on the glass after it shattered, no regards for their hands, it looked like once they ripped the shards away that they just stabbed the man over and over and over and his face had a huge X cut into the canvas.
“Tubbo!?” He jumped, quickly putting the chair back and running down the hall closing the bedroom door behind himself.

Chapter Text

“Where were you?” Ranboo placed his bag on the hook beside the door, he pushed his glasses on his head while he rubbed his eyes. Ranboo looked cold, his face was red and his eyes were watering, he mumbled something in french to himself before putting his hands in his coat pockets.
“Just looking around” Tubbo mirrored Ranboo.
Ranboo’s face scrunched up in a grimace or maybe it was just the cold, because the second Tubbo looked, Ranboo had replaced it with a joyful one; he smiled softly and had an eyebrow raised.
“What’d you see?” He pulled the coat down so it was off his shoulders, the top buttons of his shirt were undone, the neck hole was wide and nearly half way off his left shoulder, he played with the cross that hung around his neck. Tubbo tried to keep his eyes off Ranboo’s exposed shoulder.
“Just some pictures, who’s the artist?” Tubbo tilted his head.
Ranboo sucked on his bottom lip looking anywhere but Tubbo’s face, Ranboo tugged on the cross; sliding it across the chain. Tubbo watched as it slid to the left then the right. Tubbo wasn’t particularly christian but he knew the bible he read it a few times with his mother, she liked to have a schedule of something to do. The older Tubbo got the more he understood why his mother hated that house. How she still loved that man even when she died was something Tubbo could never understand. A shiver ran up his spine; remembering how that house looked every Sunday after church he could still feel the sharp pricks in his feet from the floor covered with needles. He remembered how his mother would cry yelling at Tubbo to get the kit; The ‘kit’ was a small black bag with a needle and a small bottle of Naloxone, every time Tubbo would run slower, prepare the needle slower and hand it to his mother. Sometimes he wanted to leave the air in the needle and watch as his father never woke up, but seeing such a distraught face on his mother broke something inside of him. Ranboo's voice brought him back to reality.
“I painted it. It used to be a small photo” Ranboo answered, placing his glasses back on his nose, chewing on the cross. He didn’t sound especially proud or happy about the gorgeous paintings of his own family, then again it looked like someone else didn’t really like it. Ranboo walked away before Tubbous could ask about the various slashes cut into the pieces. Tubbo watched as Ranboo walked away, the coat swaying behind him.
Tubbo waited a minute before following Ranboo in the same direction, finding him in his room, sitting at a desk with a laptop open, he was typing away while writing notes on a piece of sage green paper. His coat was discarded on the floor, his shoulder fully exposed, Ranboo sat with a leg up his head tilted slightly towards it. Tubbo walked up behind Him, his copy of ‘Romeo and Juliet’ laid to the left of his computer a stack of colourful sticky notes sat atop it, the shelf above his desk had various books and textbooks, some of which Tubbo recognised, ‘The iliad’, ‘Midsummer’s night dream’ and other William Shakespeare plays, and mythology based books, The textbooks were all literacy. Tubbo looked over Ranboo’s head at his screen. A long piece of writing was on the screen, he guessed it was some sort of essay for his university because of the notes he was scribbling down on the green paper.
Tubbo pulled Ranboo's shirt over his shoulder, “you’ll get cold” he whispered before grabbing a book. Ranboo watched him carefully as Tubbo turned a page, reading briefly through the pages, a piece of paper fell as he turned the last page, Ranboo snatched it out of the air hiding it under his computer. Tubbo’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion though before Tubbo could say anything about it Ranboo shifted, the collar of his shirt falling back off his shoulder, Tubbo ignored it this time, he placed the book back, turning and looking around the room; it was still messy and colourful, the setting sun filtering through the green curtains casting an emerald glow in the room.
“My mum will be here soon” Ranboo interrupted his thoughts, Tubbo turned to face the french man, he was facing Tubbo now. His skin was golden in the light, dotted with freckles, his features were particularly feminine and soft, long and lean. Tubbo noticed a tattoo that peeked out from the black button up, he tilted his head trying to figure it out. Ranboo caught his line of sight and unbuttoned his shirt until his left pectoral was completely bare, Tubbo felt his face heat up slightly. The tattoo was Icarus falling etched in ink into Ranboo’s golden skin. Tubbo thought the tattoo was very appropriate for someone studying literature. Ranboo flustered, and began to button his shirt without saying anything.
“And I’ll be off soon” Tubbo sat on the edge of Ranboo’s bed, “it's a pretty tattoo” Tubbo continued, his face twisting into a small smile. Ranboo blushed, grinning as he rubbed his shirt where Icarus stabbed in ink would be.
“Do you have tattoos?” Ranboo rested his elbow on the back of the chair resting it against his face. Tubbo nodded and pulled his shirt off. “OH!” Ranboo’s face turned a bright red, he hovered his hand over his eyes peeking through them. Tubbo chuckled.
“Sun and moon” Tubbo pointed to both his pectorals near his shoulders, the moon on one side and the sun mirroring the other. “A Hyacinths flower” Tubbo pointed to in between his manly man tits. Ranboo’s eyes hovered to the tattoo, a slight smile plaguing his face, something about this room and scenario felt surreal, he half smiled showing Ranboo all sides of his bare arms rotating them slowly, he wouldn’t say it was a sleeve but he had enough tattoos to scare his old pastor. Ranboo moved his chair over sitting right in front of Tubbo, Ranboo crossed his legs on the chair holding Tubbo’s arm tracing over the ink lines whispering what each thing was.
“BANG BANG” both boys flinched at the sudden knocking at the front door, Tubbo could hear a very angry woman screaming in a language he's heard many times from Ranboo.
“My la Mère here” Ranboo gave him a crooked smile before getting up from his seat. Tubbo followed suit, but when Tubbo started out the door, Ranboo had thrown his shirt at his head yelling profanities in french, he closed his eyes in frustration his face was bright red. Ranboo rushed past as Tubbo struggled with his shirt stumbling out the doorway, he pulled his shirt over his head, walking back into the room and picking up the discarded coat pulling it over his tan arms. Tubbo walked down the staircase taking his mask and glasses out of his pants pocket; placing them on his face, he was prepared for a quick departure.
At the end of the stairs Tubbo could see a strikingly beautiful dark woman, just like the lady in the paintings. She was older, around her late forties, her face aged gorgeously like red wine, round face with dark makeup, Her hair was still long and curly but it was black now glowing blue in the light that flowed in from the door. She wore a blue lace top with a black skirt and tights, and a leather jacket, a blue motorbike helmet held in her grasp. Ranboo was saying something inaudible to his mother, but when she saw Tubbo at the bottom on the staircase she had a mischievous grin on her face, she raised an eyebrow at her son, before handing Ranboo her helmet and walking right up to Tubbo. She was about 2 inches taller than himself, and Tubbo thought he was a relatively tall guy at 5’7, but that probably explained the fact that Ranboo was a towering 6’4.
“Hello Tubbo, I’m Lucille, Ranboo’s mother” her voice was careful not to let out a french accent. Her words ran through his head over and over, something was off, he started to sweat rubbing his hands together ‘what was this?’
“Um nice to meet you”
“Ranboo’s said a lot about you” When she spoke this time, it felt like a stab to the gut. It was the same voice on the radio. The same one that struggled to describe the crime HE committed. Tubbo’s heart quickened and fuck! He spoke to her and he prayed so hard that she didn’t recognise it. Tubbo needed to get out.
Tubbo thought back to Ranboo's statement ‘Everyone is always connected’ that saying was getting really fucking annoying. Tubbo felt sick, he shouldered past her quickly mumbling an excuse, Ranboo called after him but Tubbous just kept walking grabbing his keys off the hook and shoving his hands in his pocket. When he looked back Ranboo was upset but his mothers eyebrows knitted together like she wasn’t going to forget this, the last thing he saw before slamming the door closed was her folding his arms and Ranboo looking disappointed. He stumbles to his car, fumbling to get the keys out of Ranboo's coat pocket. His heart felt like it was going to explode, his hands were sweating profusely and when he couldn’t pull the keys from his pocket he yelled out in his native tongue, something his past pastor would’ve fainted from. He shoved his hands into his dark hair pulling out strands before he tried again with the keys, he ripped them out of the pocket, shoving them into the door and turning the key to unlock it. Pulling the door open, Tubbo gagged at the smell.. The coat. The coat covered in his good ol’ pal Randy’s blood, holding his breath, he hopped in the car, immediately turning the car on to wind the windows down. Tubbo drove off only putting his seatbelt on once he was on the road. Tubbous took a right, beelining for Phoenix, Arizona he was not happy to make such a rash decision given the fact he had barely anything on him and a full car of murder evidence he really had to get rid off.

Tubbo's eyes swam around the road in front of him, he was sure he was going to crash and die and honestly it didn’t bother him as much as he would like. Tubbo had been driving for about 4 hours now with barely 2 hours of proper sleep, the cold wind blew in through the windows that were still wide open. It was starting to rain the drops of water pelting Tubbo’s face, he sighed, winding the windows up. He glanced over to his phone, tapping it a few times checking the time when it turned on, 10:12pm. The smell of blood had gone now but it still left an iron taste in his mouth. Eventually Tubbo pulled over at a rest stop about an hour and a half from Arizona, Tubbo turned the car off, he sat there letting his eyes close. A loud horn woke him from his minute nap, groaning out in frustration he reached over and grabbed the coat from under the passenger seat and opened the door. It was raining now, soaking into his hair and clothes. Tubbo quickly locked the car running to the public bathroom, the bathroom was to say it lightly.. Disgusting, there was graffiti everywhere and needles that sat on the floor under the needle box. Tubbo cringed, turning the tap on and shoving the coat under the freezing water, he scrubbed at the coat getting the stains out with his hands, the water flowed red, some droplets finding their way up his arms. A moment later a man walked in, he was dark and wore a black hoodie and grey track pants and slides. He walked in and went to the first urinal. Tubbo watched him out of the corner of his eye, still cleaning his coat as the water started coming out clearer. The man turned around pulling his pants up walking to the sink next to Tubbo, he grunted turning the tap on. Tubbous watched him through the mirror turning the coat around so the stain he was washing out was underneath and out of sight. The man looked up, staring straight at Tubbo through the mirror, he had dark eyes, a scar running down the side of his cheek down to his neck.
“The Fuck you looking at faggot?” he jerked forward, trying to make Tubbo flinch. He didn’t. Tubbo continued to stare, the man's face becoming judging.
“I said! The FUCK you looking at! FAGGOT!” he said, each swear louder than the first, cupping his hands under the water and staring directly at Tubbo. Tubbo’s fight or flight kicked in. He kicked the guy’s knee in, the guy yelped falling to the ground. Tubbo grabbed the coat pushing hard on the stain, it was no longer visible. “WHAT THE FUCK” the guy yelled shoving a hand in his hoodie pocket, getting up on his feet he pulled out a pistol cocking the thing. Tubbo whacked the guy with his soaking wet coat, knocking the gun out of his hand, it fired when it flew out of his hand, both boys flinched, stopping momentarily, but Tubbo reacted first he kicked the gun pegging it at the needle pile. The guy reacted by flying out to grab Tubbo but Tubbo was quicker flying out of the bathroom and straight to his car, lighting flashed in the distances blinding him shortly after the light disappeared. Tubbo ran into his car, pulling out his keys he could hear the gunshots, the guy was trying to yell over the sound of the heavy rain and thunder. Tubbo could hear the shots whisk past his head, the sound was deafening and left his ears ringing. Tubbo pulled the door open, one final shot was sent before Tubbo got in the car, Tubbo screamed out in agony, his arm was on fire, the smell of iron and burning cotton was strong. Tubbous slammed the door shut locking it from outside and turning the car on, the man had run up to the window still threatening to shoot Tubbo, the man tried the trigger but unfortunately for Tubbo the barrel was empty. The man banged his palm on the window, Tubbo smashed his foot on the accelerator driving off, the man following but eventually being too slow for the car. Tubbo got on the highway, a car beeping behind him and then speeding past. His eyes swam in his head and his arm was on fire, he felt bile in the back of his throat, he coughed not being able to focus on the road swerving out of his lane, Tubbo pulled over unable to even twitch his arm, he pulled the coat off his arm burning a losing consciousness for a brief moment. Tubbo looked down at his arm, his biceps was shredded open the bullet only grazed his arm but it looked like some small wild animal had mauled him, blood gushed out pouring down his arm ‘so much for cleaning the jacket’ Tubbo grabbed his own coat holding it against the open wound, it stung light a complete bitch and it started to swell. Tubbo needed medical attention.. And he thought about that, light a complete idiot. ‘Im hurt’ he would say and they would say ‘hey aren’t you that really bad guy that's wanted in like the whole country of American’ and then he would say ‘no of course not’ and he would be put in jail for life because Tubbo is way to poor for a lawyer and then he will get touched and die in prison, and Ranboo still wouldn’t know what the fuck happened to him. Tubbo frowned at that thought and even more at the thought of Ranboo, his disappointed face replaying in his head, he suddenly wanted to survive instead of wishing that Zeus would struck his car at that very moment.
“For fuck sakes” Tubbo opened the car door, turning the hazard lights on and hoping out, he turned inside light on in the car and uncovered his wound it was still pouring blood but he couldn’t risk infection. He stood under the rain pulling his shirt sleeve up completely out of the way letting the rain wash out the blood, the red water dripping on the dirt below him, cars racing by. Tubbo stumbled to the boot of his car, the world fading around him, he paused for a moment leaning on his good arm against the car, breathing carefully for the fear of passing out.
“Pass out later” he chided himself opening the boot, the shotgun and other things he stole were still floating about in the back of the car. Tubbo pulled the cover of the boot floor up, a long rectangle shape cut into the boot had various things from ‘the kit’, booze and weed to a medkit. Tommy and Tubbo both loved this car. He grabbed the med kit, placing the floor back down, Tubbo opened the medical bag; grabbing a pair of gloves and attempted to put it on his good hand much to his luck he could not get the latex over his hand, he cussed, bringing it to his other hand, paining himself to hold it with his injured arm. He got it on, with a bit of water in the finger holes but that didn’t matter right then. Tubbo grabbed the kit balancing it with his forearm to keep it open and moved back to the front seat where there was light, he sat and started to pull out the pieces of clothing that got lodged in the ruined skin, twisting every once in a while to let the rain rinse the blood and clothing out of his left arm. Everything was agonising and became a blur, he swears he passed out at least a few times because he found himself leaning scarily too far out the open door. Tubbo rummaged through the bag finding antibacterial cloth, bad news.. He had to rip it open, he gripped it in his teeth opening the bag, it broke open falling onto his lap, Tubbo pinched the cloth shaking it out of the bag. He twisted, so the wound was under the rain before wiping around the gaping wound with the cloth, when it didn’t stop pouring out with blood Tubbo began to panic rummaging through the bag for a tourniquet, to Tubbo’s dismay he did not have one, taking a breath, he pulled off his own belt, using his teeth to wrap it above the wound pulling it as tight as he could, his arm twitched from the lack of blood flow but better news is that the bleeding was beginning to stop. He wiped around it again with the cloth, throwing it on the passenger seat floor grabbing out a bandaged roll, trying his best to wrap it tightly around the wound with one arm and his teeth while also trying to make sure his spit didn’t infect the area.
Managing the best he could, Tubbo pressed the button behind the wheel to close the boot door. He locked himself in the car, putting the seat back, he knew the best thing to do right now was to not fall asleep but he was exhausted, his body hurt like a bitch and he kept falling in and out of consensus. Tubbo shoved his hand in the medkit fiddling around for the familiar cylinder object made from god, he found it bringing to himself, he prepared the object, pouring the Penthrox into the green whistle and mixing it around, he did a silent prayer to Father Juan and sucked on the whistle slowly, it didn’t work right away but when it did he felt like he was on cloud nine. It didn’t deplete all the pain but it was a thousand times better than it was before, changing it from agonising pain to a mild pain in the ass. His eyes started to droop and he fell into a deep sleep, he hoped he’ll wake again.

Tubbo woke to a dim light, he was still in his car, his limbs stiff and painful.
“Shit” Tubbo twitched his left arm around, his right wouldn’t respond. Tubbo reached over, loosing the belt and pulling it off, He massaged his shoulder trying to regain circulation in his arm, he was glad one; he was alive and two; his arm hadn’t fallen off or started to die. The familiar feeling of pins and needles began to fill his arm, he unwrapped the wound, the gauze was already soaked with blood. Moving his arm was agonising and the blood flow started to drip from the wound, he’ll need to close it somehow. He dug into the med kit again trying to find something of use, he found a small sewing kit and took it out of the bag, the string was not medical but it was the only thing he could use at that moment. Tommy's house should have more stuff. Tubbo struggled with another antibacterial cloth, he bit one end of the string in between his teeth and wrapped the cloth around it sliding it up and down, hoping this would at least make it a bit safer to stab into his flesh. Tubbo still had the glove on and decided it was good enough he cut the string at his lips catching it quickly before it hit his lap.
“Awh wait” Tubbo groaned, realising he had to get the string into the needle, he sighed, grabbing another glove and painfully putting it on his over hand. Tubbo leaned over so he wouldn’t have to lift his arm, it still hurt but it was bearable his eyes swam and watered making it hard to see what he was doing, with the needle in his hurt hand and the string in the other he fiddled with it trying to get the string in the needle hole. Tubbo’s hands were sweaty and his head started to pound again. Somehow Tubbo managed to get the string in, he sat up, his eyes starting to lose focus, he breathed and started to stitch together his broken skin ignoring the blood trickling down his arm. It burnt and was just bearable enough to continue, until it was a messy suture line. Tubbo breathed out trying to keep his body from giving up on him, he sat up shoving all the shit back into the med kit, quickly wrapping the wound the best he could with one hand and his teeth. Tubbo turned the key in the ignition, and pulling out onto the road, his arm burnt at any sudden movements and his head pounded like church bells, he tried his best to stay in between the lines with his hurting head and stiff arm.
Tubbo drove for about an hour when the sun was starting to come up, it was dim and foggy but the sunlight was warm on his skin. Tubbo drove past desert and more desert all in a straight line, his eyes began to close he could feel his body trembling, he hoped he wasn’t going into shock.
“Come onnn” he complained out loud, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel impatiently. He looked ahead at the wonderful sign of Phoenix right there in his face, he drove ever so faster. Tubbo felt a wave of anxiety wash over him driving into Phoenix, he knew Phoenix like the back of his hand yet he felt lost and anxious like it wasn’t the place he used to know. Tubbo took a deep breath, taking a left off the highway and headed straight, Tubbo drove up to a black gate with the words 'Saint Francis, Cemetery’ written in metal he parked up the road, and got out walking towards death.

Chapter Text

The Cemetery was neat and clean with slabs on the floor all were christian and had Jesus carved into the material or a bible quote, flowers of all colours lay along on the slabs. Tubbo climbed over the locked gate. He guessed it was locked because it's a sunday and they prioritise church, then again that also made no sense.. Oh. Tubbo caught sight of a very colourful grave with a metre tall Virgin Mary statue at the head of it, the grave was covered in flowers, toys and cards. It was locked because someone just got buried. No one was around, even the lights were off in the church, probably because it was 5am on a Sunday. Tubbo walked around reading each individual name, some had fresh flowers, some had none, some were clean and sparkly while the others were dark and dirty barely readable. Tubbo passed by a grave it was dirty with moss and mud, a very old and dirty teddy bear laid keeled over to the side. Tubbo crouched down and sat the bear back up, the grave looked abandoned like family didn’t care about it. He wiped the slap pushing at least an inch of mud off the concrete, ‘unnamed child’ it read, complexed Tubbo pushed all the mud away just barely making out the date 2001 - 2003. Tubbo leaned over, taking a rose from the colourful grave beside it and placing it along the slab, he took a breath bringing his hands together in front of his mouth, Tubbo whispered a prayer before moving on. He walked for a while, taking his time reading each one and stealing a flower from each bouquet that he passed; he now had his own colourful bouquet full of flowers. Tubbo stopped dead in his tracks; a pearly white slap sat glistening in the morning sun, it sat in front of a tree with fairy lights in it, the slab was colourful with flowers and cards with names familiar to Tubbo. He sat on the ground holding the bouquet in his lap, he felt lighter and safe even if he was only a slab now. Tubbo ran his fingertips along the engraved letters ‘T.O.M.M.Y R.H.O.D.E.S’, Tubbo’s face lit up each letter making him smile a bit more at a time. He placed the flowers on Tommy’s grave, feelings of guilt swelling in his stomach.
“May you be in heaven with thy Lord, and granted eternal light in the safety of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen” Tubbo crossed himself resting his hands on his lap. Tubbo felt odd praying but it felt right in the place of peace and rest, and for respect for Tommy; who, like a good Catholic, went to church and prayed for everyone but himself, which.. Well, it didn't turn out the best for him. Maybe Tubbo was the devil or lucifer, maybe he was chaste out of the light, set on the path of darkness to eternal hell. Tubbo trimmed the grass around the grave with his finger nails.
“I'm sorry..” Tubbo’s chest swelled, he rubbed at his sore eyes. “You were always so bright, even when your parents divorced you still managed to help me when I had no one. I… feel guilty. My life is dull without you.. I hope you know, wherever you are, that I love you. As a friend and a brother even if you are a stupid American“ Tubbo breathed finding peace with his mate.
“Hey! What are you doing here!” an angry voice shook the calm in Tubbo’s body out and switched it with urgency. Tubbo was bare, his mask and glasses still in the car, he tried ignoring the yelling voice hoping they would let up. Tubbo felt a firm hand on his shoulder, the stranger spun Tubbo around with such force he landed on his back squishing the flowers that Tubbo hand picked himself. The strangers froze staring wide eyed at Tubbo, his hands curled into tight fists. “YOU MURDERER!” he swung, landing a fist straight to Tubbo's nose. It made a squelching crack; blood pouring out of it. He stood up reading himself as good as he could with one well working arm and a swelling nose. The next punch was deflected by Tubbo’s forearm and he knee’d the stranger in the gut making him step back before turning to the side to throw a nasty punch which with the size difference, would most likely end Tubbo's bloodline. Tubbo ducked, earning a knee into the face much too quickly for Tubbo to do anything, he fell to the ground pushing back with his feet and hands. The Stranger grunted, stomping on Tubbo's calf, he cried out in pain rolling to a crouch when the man lifted his foot just to smash it back onto the ground. Tubbo got up, going for a firm punch on the man's cheek but missing.. Because he tried punching with his shot arm. Tubbo winced in pain, knowing he was not winning this fight he made a limp for it. He stumbled to the gate, scaling it the best he could but it still wasn’t good enough, the man grabbed Tubbous’s foot, ripping him from the gate back to the floor. “Oh no you don’t!” the man yelled, shoving Tubbo against the gate, and going for another punch to the face which Tubbo moved just in time to miss getting his whole face smashed up. Tubbo gave his empathy and kicked him so hard in the nuts he swore he could feel it himself. The man’s face scrunched up in pure pain, stars practically visible to Tubbo with a quiet whine, tears started to fall down the man's face as he cupped his crown jewels. While the man was down he gave him an impressive left hand punch to the face knocking him to the frozen ground. The man wiggled on the grass, cupping his broken nose and prize possessions and Tubbo stomped.
Tubbo with all his body weight lifted and struck the man in the head with his good foot, the man gurgled and splattered about trying to grab Tubbo’s ankles but Tubbo was too quick, whenever the man tried to look he was met with Tubbous’s shoe to his already mangled face, mud and grass getting into his eyes. Everytime Tubbo stomped more blood started to splat out covering the grass and Tubbo shoe, droplets found themselves dripping down Tubbo’s leg, eventually the stranger stopped struggling. Tubbo moved his foot away, grafts on skin sticking to the bottom of his shoe, he wiped it on the grass. Tubbo grabbed the guy hauling them over his shoulder with effort, struggling to throw him over the gate. With effort Tubbo managed to haul the guy over the top, he fell landing hard on the wet ground.
“Ah shit I have to get over now” Tubbo sighed and began to climb, with the adrenaline he could barely feel the pain past his buzzing head. Tubbo hopped down from the gate landing on the stranger's arm, he lost his balance and fell atop the guy. “Ow '' he turned his head, the mutilated face of the man looking back at him, an eyeball falling out. Tubbo turned his head back, getting up. “I wish I had Randy’s truck” Tubbo complained, grabbing hold of the guy’s legs and dragging him barely a metre before noticing the blood trail and deciding to pick him up. Hauling the heavy man on Tubbous’s shoulder he reached the car pulling the back door open and shoving the guy on the floor, wedged between the seats. “I'm giving this car a serious clean or exploding it” Tubbo slammed the door shut, wiping the blood off his face and hopping in the driver's seat. He sat there for a bit, looking at himself in the mirror, the adrenaline was draining away making everything hurt it burned to move his limbs.
Sirens wailed in the distance, Tubbo had been sitting in his car watching the sunrise for less than a minute before he could see the red and blue lights flare. “Shit” Tubbo turned the key, pressing hard on the gas while putting the car in reverse, he backed into a driveway and turned back towards the highway making a turn heading north. Tubbo could hear sirens behind him near the cemetery, it wouldn't be long until they found him, Tubbous made a beeline towards a very special place.
Tubbo stopped abruptly, the house was a standard American house, not abandoned and lonely. The house was high up in the north where there were neighbourhoods of abandoned houses for miles as no one wanted to live so far out. Tubbo got out rushing to get get the back door open he swung it open, grabbing the man and dragging him out onto the floor, Tubbo took of his jacket wrapping it around the mans face, for his own being and because the fucker was bleeding everywhere. He slung him over his own shoulder and ran as quick as he could up a driveway with an 150 kg man on his back, Tubbo figured it was the adrenaline and not that he was swole as fuck. He dropped the man in the front door and the figure was unlocked because the lock was broken. He hoped no teenagers were around to break into houses to do drugs and have parties. Tubbo shut the door the best he could, running back to the car he could hear them not, loud. Sirens came blaring down the road, he couldn’t see the cars but he knew they were coming. Tubbo shut the back door and got in, slamming hard on the accelerator, she shot away looking back to see the colourful lights in the back, surprisingly no blood dripped towards the house causing all the police cars to zip right past. Tubbo took an off road detour making a wide U-turn back towards the city, the cops being as far as the were struggled to keep up, Tubbo drove back onto the road making cars beep in angry behind him, he drove under the bridges of the highway having caught sight of a helicopter ‘they’re really going all out’ Tubbo grumbled speeding down the lower highway overtaking cars too fast for them to beep at him. Cop cars started to look for him on the higher part of the highway but the helicopter took sight of him following him the best he could, Tubbo accused seeing police start a roadblock at the end of the road. He slowed coming to a bridge, Tubbo looked around his car for something before hearing the blessing; a loud oil truck stunned their horn, Tubbo swerved onto the other side of the road, siding around cars. He reached the bridge, slamming on the accelerator barreling towards the truck it horned trying to slow down and swerve away but the lineup of cars at its side left it vulnerable, as the car picked up speed Tubbo opened the car door feeling the wind whip against his face. Tubbo jumped.
He landed hard rolling away and into a chain link fence, he ignored the jutting pain through his back and got up, Tubbo climbed over the fence into a ‘homeless village’ bumping into homeless onlookers staring terrified at the car still going 100 km/h toward the truck. The person in the oil truck followed suit, jumping out of their truck but being more unfortunate and ended up getting hit by a car, they rolled up the vehicle, smudges of blood cascaded down the windshield leaving the woman driving terrified in her small corvette. The body landed lifeless on the tarmac. Tubbo didn’t spend time looking and more running towards the mass of tents and shopping carts, the vehicles collided sending a hot shock wave that caused tents to come down and shopping carts to rattle, Tubbo fell to the ground like most people around him, he covered his head shaking in pain and fear, the sound was horrible; people screaming in pure fear, the vehicles colliding, the fire crackling in the dawn. His ears rang, the woman that was screaming now a muffled hum, Tubbo’s eyes blurred and his mind spiralled into a flashback, a distant memory of the past.

////////////

He cocked the shotgun in the air, the empty case of the bullet falling to the pale autumn ground.
“Now Tubbous when you load the gun you gotta make sure the safety’s on” He passes the shotgun to Tubbo, the man had soft green eyes, a long brown beard and olive skin. Tubbo held the gun in his left, flipping the safety on with his thumb, pulling a red round from his pocket. He slid it into the chamber with a satisfying click, Tubbo looked to his dad for confirmation; he nodded. Tubbo pressed the button and worked on preparing another round, he switched the safety off, moving the firearm to his face resting the but against his shoulder. He aimed at the rabbit a few hundred yards away, its white fur tainted with dirt, it was eating a cabbage stolen from the farm a little down the road. “Don’t hesitate, my boy” Dad rested his hand on Tubbo’s left. The rabbit stood on its hind legs looking around, Tubbous shot, the rabbit’s snow white fur turned velvet red it fell to the ground, Tubbo watched it through the scope of the gun as it bled out on the dead grass. Tubbous opened the chamber, the empty case ejecting out, he closed it aiming for a hole in the ground waiting for the other rabbits to hop out of hiding, a brown rabbit this time stuck its head out, its ears straight up. Tubbo didn’t hesitate sending his next round, the rabbit's head shot back, its neck breaking from the pressure, it slid down the hole leaving a trail of blood left on the dirt.
Tubbo ejected the case and switched the safety on, moving the gun horizontally across himself, the barrel facing away from his father.
“Good job my boy! You're a true hunter Tubbous” he slapped Tubbo on the shoulder with a proud smile on his face, his voice was deep and he rolled his words, his skin was a dirty brow from years hunting outside, he wore a grey cowboy hat.
Tubbo's vision blurred and the world around him died dark, his vision cleared, white noise played loud like a hurricane was moving through and Tubbo was in the eye of the storm, Tubbo's father changed; he looked sick, bleeding from every inch of his body, his brown tan was pale and grey. Tubbo looked down at the gun in his hand; the barrel was facing the other way, towards his father. Tubbo turned his head; his father had a shot through his head, a split down his skull cascading down with blood, his fathers eyes locked with his own they were golden brown and full of hate, loathe sat his eyes staring back at Tubbo looking deep into his plain eyes.
“I hate you, you know that” his father spoke his voice loud yet his mouth barely moved, Tubbo felt himself nodding, he readied his gun aiming for his empty heart. “You were never my son,” his father continued, closing his eyes slowly. “You’re a monster, not my fucking son” he held his arms out like christ on a cross “I wanted you dead” the gun fired straight through his father’s once beating heart, that once bright heart. The world around him fell apart.

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Tubbo woke with a ringing pain in his head, the world around him was bright and loud; people were screaming for help and sirens sounded in the distance, people rushed about, running around Tubbo like he was a mere crack in the path. With difficulty Tubbo got to his feet the world felt like it was moving on its own. The ground below him was spinning in circles, he stumbled when he walked, blood dripping from his arms. Tubbo had his fair share of pain today trying to run away from the police and mental retards. Tubbo moved past the panic reaching the end of the homeless village and exiting out of the gate, people were confused recording the scene or desperately trying to find the news on their phones with shaky hands. He felt nauseous and his head was screaming, his blood dripped on the floor leaving a trail of the substance seeping deep into the concrete, Tubbo hoped that his DNA trail won't be tested to find where he's going, he much rather not get busted by the police when visiting his brother. Tubbo climbed along weaving through countless people all pushing and shoving, he pushed through stopping at a bus stop, he dropped to the seat and forced himself to stay awake no matter how hard it was to even move. Tubbo waited hiding his face in his hoodie, a bus came to a stop with a loud screech; people got off and on.
“You on or off, son?” an old woman, wearing hippy attire said from the driver's seat of the bus, she had long pointy ears, her eyes were pitch black and.
“I don’t have any money” Tubbo said in a hushed tone, his throat was on fire, pain bruised his whole body.
“Just get the fuck on boy” the woman yelled rolling her eyes filled with kindness, maybe this was an angel. The bus doors began to close, the old woman placing sunglasses on her face, Tubbo hurried getting in the vehicle just before the doors hissed shut. He took the first seat cradling his arm, he was dripping with blood. How did he get himself hurt this bad? He had no idea. ‘I just blew Tom’s car up… fuck my shit was in there’ Tubbo groaned complaining silently to himself.
“Where you heading?” the bus driver said, looking directly at Tubbo.
“Could you face the road?” Tubbo suggested taking a look around the bus, it was mainly empty except for a few college kids, runaways and two elderly women whispering away. The driver sighed facing the road just in time to stop at a red light making everyone slam forward.
“Watch it Kacey!” one of the old women said spit trickling out of her mouth.
“Shut the fuck up you old hag!” The bus driver threw something from her dashboard just scarcely missing her head, the old lady gave a dirty look whispering to her mate next to her. Kacey rolled her eyes again facing the road, Tubbo felt eyes on him even though Kacey was looking straight ahead, he felt compelled to look over.
“Tramonto” Tubbo said hesitantly, breathing deeply, the pain was excruciating and Tubbo had nothing to help, he just hoped Tommy’s griefed house still had his medication. It was stupid enough that Tubbo left that sort of stuff there anyway. Kacey gave Tubbo a puzzled look, taking a turn off the highway to avoid the commotion he created.
“You mean where that boy died?” She said concerned “no one lives around that part anymore” Tubbo felt his heart skip a beat, with all that pain and adrenaline, he almost forgot he’s the one the police want. He pulled his hood further over his head turning towards the window. Kacey stayed quiet gazing at him through the mirror, she said nothing more keeping her distance, it was obvious she had thoughts on her mind. Tubbo didn’t feel like getting his hands dirty anymore today, he already had a body waiting patiently for his help in decaying.
Kacey stopped about a block from Tom’s house, she watched Tubbo carefully as he got off the bus, her eyes had a yellow glow and her ears stuck up.
“You be careful now, son” she called her once loud and kind tone now laced with fear and concern. Tubbo watched the bus pull away from the station and down the road, once the bus was out of view he took to behind the bus stop weaving through the fences of houses, crossing the block with difficulty. The place was deserted ‘W Darien way’ was a short street from the T-Section, Tom lived at the last house on the left, it faced the flat Arizonian desert covered the front yard in trees to help with summer heat. Tubbo remembered riding his bike together with Tom when his father went to court every Monday, they used to ride up and down the street playing with the neighbourhood kids that Tom used to be friends with. The street was empty now and cold, majority of the houses near Tom’s were vacant, some with graffiti on ‘For Sale’ signs that lay broken at some houses. Tom’s house was the real abandoned villa, it had graffiti all over some messages to Tom and ‘Toxin’, Bible verses, and just random drawings you’d see under a bridge. On the front door, written the words in red spray paint, “Toxin will be the saviour of us all”, Toxin was the name the media gave Tubbo after his first few murders they believed that his power was poison or acid, because of the bodies that were drugs or half dissolved into acid, now Tubbo was going back to those ways. The message was unsettling, Tubbo knew what he does was mental and not what god would of wanted, but the emptiness he felt in his heart was like a black hole that sucked in any light his heart produced and dissolving it too nothingness, the feeling of adrenaline was the only thing he chased, he mother said that he’d find something that made him truly happy. His mind shifted to Ranboo, his weird eyes and guarded words made his heart beat ever so faster, Tubbo wished he could rip Ranboo’s glowing heart out of his chest cavity and eat it whole, It intrigued him. Tubbo opened the unlocked door, the strange man from the cemetery still laying on the floor, Tubbo closed the door behind him moving a small table that used to be used for keys; up against the door handle to restrict it from opening. The house was dark and empty, glass shards scattered the floor, the windows boarded up with wood and tarp. It was a sudden shock to see the house so dark and empty, it used to be filled with light, Tom made this house so bright and joyful, even Tubbo’s endless abyss couldn’t destroy all the light that boy gave off, Tom shared it with others even with his own struggles like the divorce and his mum passing away a week before his birthday, they planned a trip to Rhode Island for his birthday. Tubbo could still recall the pain Tom kept in his eyes trying to cancel the plane tickets, Tubbous had convinced him that his mother would’ve liked him to go and enjoy his birthday, the once bright and happy Tommy was dark and gloomy, tears swelling in his eyes.
Tom had asked Tubbo to go with him that night and of course Tubbous agreed to go with. That week Tom barely ate and he brought a picture of Kristin everywhere he went, only ever putting her down to sleep. His grief only grew yet he was still there when Tubbo needed him and shared his light with anyone who asked for it.
Images of his years of living with Tommy flooded his mind, the guilt rose in his gut like bile. Tubbo inhaled suddenly letting out a shaky breath, he was confused, his eyes stung and his breath stayed uneven. He sobbed.

Chapter Text

Tubbo dragged the body away down the corridor and into the basement, its head knocked on the wood each step down, It stunk like rats and alcohol. The basement was small, a dim LED light, a workbench stained with blood and paint, a whole lotta tools, Tom’s easels and buckets full of paints, they were his mothers but when the divorce happened, his father never touched them they laid to rot in the dark. Tommy found painting calming, remembering how his mother used to do it. He and Tubbo would watch her when they were younger late at night, Kristin would tell them to go back to bed but would say nothing more when Tom would sit next to her watching each brushstroke. Tubbo let go of the man’s legs leaving to go look for a big enough barrel and his old supply of Sulfuric Acid. Tubbo found an old freezer and dragged it over to the centre of the room, the light switch above had a sting attached to it, he pulled on it a soft sounding click turned the switch on. The dim light lighting a small area in the middle of the room, enough light to pour sulfuric acid at 40˚C into the bucket. Tubbo picked the heavy man up carrying him bridal style over to a stained workbench, hauling him on top. The majority of the tools Tubbo left here, were still where he left them, either slightly bent or graffitied. He picked up a pair of scissors and began to cut away at the fabric that covered the grizzly man. Tubbo disliked this part, he honestly hated the human body, it was nasty and gross even his own body, Tubbo wanted to rip himself to shreds, maybe it was self hate or something more. Tubbo began sawing away, starting at joints in his leg tossing the limbs into the bucket, each motion tore at the skin, blood spraying up from each new sliced open vein, the substance coated his hands, drops dripping from his face, it tasted like metal and sickly bitter cherries. Tubbo wasn’t one for drinking blood or consuming flesh, but the sickening taste brings him back to the present, like some sort of reminder of the humanity he doesn’t have, like a chain wrapped around his neck, tugging him into the submissive nature of society. He never really thought that other people could feel pain, or emotions like he could, Tubbo’s mind worked differently, nothing else was real. Maybe he felt a bit of regret, but what was the point if no one else was as real as he was? Tubbo thought back to Ranboo; his golden heart and warm skin, he felt as real as they could get, yet Tubbo couldn’t shake off the feeling that Ranboo wasn’t real no matter how hard he tried to believe so.
Tubbo picked up each body part placing them carefully into the sulfuric acid without splashing the substance. Getting to the head the solution was already bubbling and had an awful smell, hiding the bottom half of his face in his shirt, he lowered the head into the acid, closing the lid right away. Tubbo cracked the lid with a spare piece of wood to reduce it from building pressure. ‘Going back to my old ways’ Tubbo thought of the countless people that he’s dissolved before, the news reporters being speechless while hazmat suited people carried fridges and barrels, taped up to limit the danger of spilling the liquid. He thought back to his second murder.

Tubbo when he was 16, watching the news with Tommy.
“The weather tonight is showing some furious storm clouds travelling over Arizona for-” The news reporter hesitated, quickly tapping the microphone in her ear. The scene changed back to the original reporter sitting in front of the desk, his eyes were wide and jaw ajar.
“Um. We have news from the Phoenix police station. A very gruesome scene here today” the tv showed men in hazmat suits, and a man that looked like a bee; a hero. Caring a disgusting white barrel covered in blood, the hero carried out a black container that was soon known to have been carrying organs. It switched back to the reporter he was in shook, hesitating to say anything, a bit of background noise was heard through the microphones in the studio. “... down in Arizona an old house was reported smelling foul over the past 2 weeks and have sent police to come look inside, on inspection a devastating scene was reported to have blood along the floors, bits of- flesh stuck in scissors and saws. Pro hero Stinnger is here to say a piece about the situation." The scene changed to the hero standing in front of the door of the house, inside was dark, the hazmat suit people walking in and out with chemicals on their back.
“In my 30 years of hero work, never have I ever seen such a horrific scene. I can't fathom what sort of monster would do something like this, and I will do everything in my power to stop this villain” Stinger, handed the microphone over to the camera man and flew away. The TV shut off.
Tommy got up off the floor, his face was white and he was looking around trying to find something not even he knew of.
“What's wrong?” Tubbo spun around at his place on the floor, Tommy just shook his head, breathing deeply like he was coming down from a panic attack. “Tom.”
“Isn’t it disgusting? Like who could do that like i hope whoever that was gets the worse of punishments and like their family are never going to know what happened to them because of how mangled up they are” Tubbo could still remember exactly how he felt when he saw the god awful look on Tommy’s face; pale and devastated. Even today Tubbo couldn’t figure out how an emotion could affect his life in such a traumatising way. He could also remember the girl he killed, her name was Samatha and was in grade 12, she was a total cunt and would make fun of the death of Tommy’s mother, she’d also mail them letters writing how Tommy was a man slut and Tubbo was a scary freak. He pretended to be a girl in Samatha’s biology class that she was secretly in love with, to come to her house to ‘hook up’ which she was just met with the insanity of Tubbo. He felt no remorse for cutting her limbs off one by one with her awake, he could still hear her screams muffled into the cloth in her mouth, Tubbo read out the letters she’d send for every limb he’s cut off. She’d beg and plead for god to save her, and the only answer she’d get was her own words being repeated back to her. So no, Tubbo couldn’t understand why Tommy was so shaken up, if what he did was for the best of Tommy. Tubbo wondered how Tom would react to his crimes. That's all Tubbo did, was murder people that’d give them trouble, witness or nearly figure it out. He did it just to see the relief on Tom’s face when his day would run smoothly without insults or letters.

Tubbo ascended the basement stairs, he proceeded through the dark house. He found his old room, the stuff trashed and stolen, Tubbo laid on his old bed thinking about the nights he and Tommy would stay awake together writing letters to his dad who’d moved away after the divorce to pursue his business elsewhere, leaving the teenagers alone in the house. They’d play games together and talk about Tommy’s unrealistic crushes. Tubbo felt a tingle on the back of his neck, the air shifted weirdly throughout the room, a dark shadow fell over the room. Without the moonlight it was near impossible to make out anything in the dark. Tubbo shot up searching the room in a panic. “Where are you?”
A monotone voice came from all around him “Nope… not there- little left” Tubbo couldn’t pinpoint the voice “too left now right- no. turn around” Tubbo faced the window, the light outside lit up the silhouette of a person, crouching on the window seal.
“Who the fuck?” Tubbo squinted his eyes like an old grandpa trying to read a book in 200 font size.
“Are you- are you good?” the guy hopped off the seal into the bedroom, the light filtered through the guy’s massive monarch wings, the room looked like a crystal of rainbows with a filter of orange. Speaking of monarchs.
“Alexander..” Tubbo sat back on bed picking at his shirt. He was exhausted, and his eyes were struggling to stay open.
“Ugh I swear- It’s ‘monarch. Whatever, what are you doing here ‘Toxin’” Alex said in a mocking way, he leaned against the window frame, fluttering his wings in the moonlight. Tubbo scoffed at the name, bringing his eyes to meet familiar red ones. Tubbo and Alex have known each other since they were kids, they met in the wondrous foster system, he was nine while Alexander was sixteen. Acting like brothers and being there for each other, the only thing different was that Alex never left the system, he went to university at eighteen, while Tubbo found Tommy. They had very different career paths. If you even call Tubbo’s life a career, Alexander spends his career caring for the youth, protecting them and being able to give them a full and happy life. He tracks down child molesters, people who kidnap children, and anyone who can cause harm to children, he never wants what happened to him to affect another child. He never told Tubbo his whole story.

Tubbo was nine, sitting in the old dusty room made for a six year old girl. Another boy around sixteen, he had short pink hair and sat in the corner of the room picking at a piece of the floorboard. Tubbo had just been put in the room after the police came and grabbed him, he’d just moved with his uncle to America, but he just so happily died of a heart attack just twelve hours before.
“Hi” Tubbo moved closer to the edge of the bed, the boy furrowed his eyebrows. Tubbo tried again, this time sitting a metre away from him. The boy sniffled, rubbing his eyes.
“What do you want?” The boy replied, finally looking up at Tubbo, his eyes were red, like actually red, his skin was pale white and his eyes moved around a lot but felt like he was only looking at Tubbo. He placed a card set in front of the pink haired boy.
“I want to do a-” Tubbo bit his tongue trying to remember the english word for ‘Juego’ “a game with you, mi nombre es Tubbo” the boy tilted his head but picked up the deck to shuffle the cards.
“Alexander. Thirty-one?” Alex responded, and that's what they did for the few years together was play card games and talk about their lives and futures. Tubbo found out that Alex’s parents were drug users who kidnapped kids to do disgusting things to them, Alex was abused and drugged for fun. Near the end of his life living there, his wings were cut up, crushed and when his mother was bathing him, she’d harshly scrubbed them. His school teacher called for a wellness check on his living situation. So that’s where he ended up, never adopted again or put in a foster home because of his age and pretty pink hair, because obviously no one wants some kid with Pink Hair >:(.

“I'm revisiting the past,” Tubbo replied.
“Right. Yeah whatever, you’ve done it again haven’t you, you’re lucky i'm not on duty or I would’ve had to report you” Alex brought his hair over his left shoulder, fingering through the knots. His hair was much much longer than it was when they were kids, his father decided to punish him for looking like a ‘fag’ and a girl by dying his hair pink and cutting it like a girl, in definests Alex grew his hair out and now colours it pink, a thing he used to do anyways before therapy but with black hair dye to cover his natural snow, white hair. Now it was his signature look as a hero.
“Gonna hand me in this time Monarch?” Alex sighed, starting to loosely braid his hair. Tubbo grew impatient laying back down on the bed, the light fluttered with the sound of Alex’s wings, he sat on the edge of the bed.
“You know I never blamed you for killing those people, yet I also expected it”
“Expected it?” Tubbo sat back up, he noticed all the small changes in Alex. He was much more muscular now, looking more masculine than his usual femme, his hair was darker, stubble had grown out, and he had darker circles under his eyes.
“Yeah I expected it, you always had such low empathy and emotions for animals and exceptionally people. I used to read books about it; sociopaths, psychopaths, serial killers, mentally deranged people. Expressionally, with your childhood I always knew that one day I'll see you on posters, now I fight people like you.” Alex stared at his hands; calloused and ruff. He took Tubbous’s hand picking at his sweater, he didn’t know exactly what Alex was getting at, but it got him thinking ‘why do I kill’ he was never a bad kid per say, and he never wanted to hurt people but when he was a kid he felt a great urge to ‘experiment’ with some forms of violence from kicking dogs to strangling birds. Tubbo didn’t feel remorse being that other ‘animals’ didn’t feel pain like he did, Tubbo eventually took it out on humans, he’d punch kids in the foster homes, or bite his foster parents, even stabbing a pregnant lady to see if he could kill the baby. They’d scream out in pain but to Tubbo it felt like an illusion, like he was hearing things because only he was real, and real people can feel pain and emotions. Alex wasn’t far off of being unreal, but then again he could never bring himself to try and harm that pink boy.
“Solipsism Disorder” Alex’s voice shook him out of his head.
“What”
“Solipsism Disorder, I read about it only recently actually. It's a psychological condition where a person believes that reality isn’t external to a person’s mind” Alex looked in his own green eyes while Alexander’s were red and fidgety, still struggling to stay still.
“I didn’t know you were giving me a diagnosis, Dr. Zaxphor,” Tubbo said in a mocking manner.
“You can be helped you know, you don’t have to keep on running from police, you can be with that boy you were with-”
“Why would I be with Ranboo?”
“I mean I was just spitballing, you don’t haveee to be with ‘Ranboo’” Alex rolled his eyes, doing quotation marks around Ranboo’s name.
“Why would I want ‘help’ anyways” Alex paused on that for a second, Tubbo couldn’t wonder why.
“So you can live a normal life” Alex squeezed his hand, looking relatively hopeful that someone like Tubbous would want a ‘normal’ life, let alone ‘help’.
“If everyone around me isn’t real then how would they help me? I'm not ill, I am not my mother.” Alex found this strange, he’s never talked like this before and he guessed he was just playing a game since his face was ‘normal’.
“Tubbo… please” Tubbo removed himself from the bed and out of Alex’s reach.
“Leave before I kill you too” Tubbo faced the window, watching the trees swing to the movement of the wind. Alex sighed, the threat was open and not necessarily ‘threatening’ but he got Tubbo’s message. Alex took to the window, looking back one more time at Tubbo before leaping out the frame.
Once he was out of sight Tubbo let a breath out that he didn’t notice he was holding. He laid back on the bed, shutting his eyes for the second time, he refused to stay awake any longer, finally letting his body rest, expressionally that god forsaken arm.

//////////

Tubbo found a nest of little blue jays, he thought they were sooooo cute and wanted to feed them. But his mind told him that he should feed them some gravel, so he went outside the front yard and scooped up the gravel from his home’s driveway. Tubbo snuck back through the house and out the back door where he had moved the nest to the lowest branch on the large tree out the back. The little birds chirped with their mouths right open expectantly waiting for a feed, Tubbo moved all the gravel to one hand trying to hold as much as he could with his small hand, he pinched a bit with the opposite hand and dropped it over the birds. Most of them closed their mouths to the lack of smell of food, but one remained and a small rock landed right in its oesophagus causing the little blue bird to choke, the rest squawked in panic. Little Tubbo watched in amusement as the bird struggled to breathe, eventually dying after an excruciating long 15 minutes, at least for the bird. Tubbo eventually buried the bird, saying a prayer and continued to properly feed the bird's worms and bugs.
The dream switched to that of Tubbo’s first foster home.

A woman named Karol, was one of Tubbous’s more unsettling foster mothers.
“Tubbo, sweetheart. Come here for a minute” she called from the living room, Tubbo was cooking cut chicken on the stove for the quesadillas they were going to have later. Tubbo turned the stove off and hopped off the stool that helped him see over the counter. He walked into the living room, Karol was laying drowsily on the recliner chair with the majority of her clothes off, she was sweaty and tired. “I don’t bite” Tubbo shuffled closer just in her reach, she grabbed him pulling him right against the chair. Tubbo gasped, shaking against her ruff grasp, she touched his forehead brushing his hair from his face, he went still. “You know you’re such a pretty boy” Tubbo scrunched his nose, she stunk of alcohol and sweat. What was most gross was her touching him, she did it often.
“I made dinner” Tubbo tried wiggling his arm out of her grip, but she held on. With the cigarette in her mouth, she held it with two fingers putting it out on Tubbo’s arm, he flinched keeping his mouth closed shut.
“I’m not hungry” Karol lost her grip, letting the cigarette fall to the floor, he rubbed it out into the carpet with his foot as Karol turned her head, reaching for the bottle but she fell asleep halfway through her sip. Tubbous slipped out of the living room, going to prepare his own food, he felt his facade disappear. Tubbo ran the burn under water as his eyes watered, he felt ill and dirty. He couldn’t understand the feeling but he knew he hated being touched like that. The burn grew in size like a forest fire that engulfed him.

When the fire died down Tubbo was younger standing in the middle of his parents old room, they were fighting, his mamá was yelling and throwing stuff around while papá had needles in his arm. She chucked a glass at the wall nearly hitting Tubbous’s in the face, she walked out of the room grabbing Tubbo’s on the way. His mother sounded angry but her face was perfectly neutral. He followed her on the way out of the house, but the sense changed and they were now walking back inside, it was about noon the sun was high in the sky. Tubbo heard his father yell, pushing Tubbo across the room. His mother ran into the next room, as his father threw the table and chairs over, scarred bottles smashed on impact with the floor. Valorie, Tubbo’s mamá came back in with a pistol in one hand while carrying a big kitchen knife in the opposite. Her face was dark, not an ounce of emotion plastered on her face.
“Has arruinado a esta familia.” Valorie looked at Tubbo and smiled. “Una vez fui hermosa, fui amable” She grabbed her husband by the collar pulling him back, he yelled, punching her in the face, her face cracked while blood splattered down her face. Tubbo watched crouched on the floor as far as he could get against the wall, he knew he shouldn’t watch but he also couldn’t feel anything towards the situation, his heart was cold and empty. They tumbled to the floor trying to find the advantage, Tubbo’s father had his hands wrapped around his wife’s neck. She struggled to find the strength to lift the blade up, Valorie was coughing and the blood flowed into her mouth making her spit up the liquid. Tubbo watched as she stabbed his dad in the side, in more of a fit of rage than pain, his father shook her, choking her harder until she was turning purple. She continued to stab over and over, at this point it was a challenge of who could last the longest. She stabbed him in the neck, the blood gushed out like a red rainbow, she twisted the knife in his neck as it drained down her arm onto her once white blouse. Tubbo flinched to the gun sounding, a hole blasted right through his chest. He fell over sideways, his eyes rolled back as he choked on his own blood. Tubbo’s mother stumbled from the floor, she was covered in blood soaked into her hair and clothes. She drunkenly walked over to Tubbo crouching to his level, he was crying tears streaming down his face in a silent whimper. She held the gun bringing it to Tubbo’s brow “Lo siento mi hijo” as she clicked the safety off it gave Tubbo just enough time to grab the barrel to shove it from his face, a misfire shot Tubbo on the ear, cutting off a chunk of flesh. Valorie struggled against him, grabbing him by the hair and smashing it against the wall behind him. “¡No me hagas luchar contigo!” and again she re-bashed his head into the wall behind him, breaking the horrible, glass like, American drywall and possibly Tubbous’s head. He could feel the warm blood run down his neck like a worm. Valorie had picked the gun back up, pointing it back at Tubbo’s head, but he still fought, turning it to the side as forcefully as his little arms could do. She was still stronger and at a much bigger advantage than Tubbo was, if she wasn’t so light headed she'd 've already had Tubbo’s brains sprawled across the floor but Tubbo managed to keep the gun away from the most important parts of his body but he wasn’t gonna win with sheer force. He kicked her in the stomach making her keel over slightly, in that instance she lost her grip on the gun, Tubbo shoved the barrel away turning it completely around. In a fit of panic Tubbo didn’t let go of the gun and his Mother pulled the trigger, in the faintests of his mind he heard her ‘Te amo’.
The gun was the last thing he heard, her half scream as the bullet drilled its way into his mother's eye like a lobotomy, she fell over slowly. In Tubbo’s mind the whole world seems to spin slower, he watched her bleed out with the blood on his hands. His heart hurt like the bullet pierced his heart and not that of his mothers head, at least he wished that would’ve happened now.
Tubbo screamed, a blood curdling cry of agony and mourning, this moment was the last of emotions Tubbo would ever feel in his twenty years of life, at the ripe age of eight. He crawled over cradling his mother’s head in his little arms. “Mamá? Mamá Por favor despierta, lo siento… lo siento” he cried out wanting his mother to hold him again. When he heard the police sirens, he knew he had to leave. Tubbo ripped his mother’s necklace off, clutching it in his small hands while he ran out the house. It was snowing, little Tubbo ran in a fit of crying and agony. He wished god would take him now to hell where he belonged, the blood was on his hands, his heart was the one that was dull and he shot his mother’s once bright one.
There was something wrong with Tubbo.
He wasn’t normal.

***

Chapter Text

Ranboo shoved his phone across the table, after sending his 20th text. He rubbed his temple, sighing into his hand.
“Still not answering?” Lucille sat to the left of him at the dining room table, she set a tea cup down in front of him, holding a different blue cup to her lips. Ranboo shook his head, staring down at the tea infront of him, it was pink and sparkly. “Strawberry” she noted, setting down her chamomile tea down on the table. It was close to midnight, they’d stayed up chatting for most of the afternoon, anxiety had been chewing its way at Ranboo’s stomach. Lucille rested her hand on her son’s rubbing his knuckles with her thumb, “I’m sure he's fine.” Though that wasn’t what Ranboo was worried about, he knew he’d be fine knowing how many times he’d return home covered in blood, though not a single scratch on his thin body. His mother’s shoulder twitched, for a moment Ranboo thought she looked scared but she clasped her hands together “well I’m off to bed, don’t stay up too late mon amour” she muttered quickly standing from her seat. Lucille lent over planting a tender kiss upon Ranboo’s forehead, her lips warm from the tea she was drinking. He was alone in the room by himself. The anxiety continued to grow making Ranboo feel nauseous, he lent back breathing deeply. Ranboo’s phone buzzed and he shot forward opened the notification which didn’t lead to Tubbo’s message but to a facebook post from his father, dread ate at Ranboo. It was a picture of his father standing with a dark, brunette woman holding a small child. They were at the beach facing the camera, as the toddler chewed at her fist. The caption was written in french, “Marianne’s first day at the beach!” Ranboo hated her. He tossed his phone back down, when he was younger his father would love to tell Ranboo all about special effects they used in certain movies, He’d especially loved to show off movies that he starred in, he’d tell stories of when he was acting and what parts he ‘improvised’. Ranboo liked spending that time with his dad even if it was just him talking. Ranboo always knew his father wanted a daughter and a wife who wasn’t so ‘masculine’. his mother when they met loved sports and travelling, she’d hike every morning and he loathed it, he tried convincing her to have kids and be a stay at home mother, she agreed then because of love Ranboo guessed by when she fell pregnant with Ranboo his father despised them both, it wasn’t the perfect family he’d been wanting. His father never carried him nor cut the umbilical cord. For a while Ranboo was convinced that if he acted feminine enough that’d persuade his father into liking him, he’d do things like paint his nails and grow his hair long. His father would call him a fag yet still seemed to enjoy the fact Ranboo put up a feminine act, which at the time wasn’t because he wanted a daughter.. But Ranboo was too young to understand that. Ranboo enjoyed it for the most part if it wasn’t for the nights Marcus would stand by his bed watching him sleep. Ranboo soon learned to hide, to get away from him in the night.
he hated open spaces, hated the limited hiding places, every time he was in a large room, he’d get a sickening anxiety like he couldn’t escape. It made him think about his dad, nights where Ranboo would come down stairs to get water from the kitchen, his father would grab him, pulling the small boy to his barren chest.
“What are you doing up so late?” he’d ask, touching Ranboo’s face and arms, he used to fight his father’s grip and run yet finding nowhere to hide, he’d scream and cry until his mother would find Ranboo underneath his father; pinned to the floor, barely making it to the door. His father would say they were playing and walk Lucille back to bed, while Ranboo silently cried on the floor, feeling vulnerable and disgusted with himself, he resulted in scratching the top layer of skin off himself where his father touched him, the showers doing nothing to get the feeling off himself.
Ranboo found himself crying, bouncing his leg up and down. He got up from the dining room table taking himself in bed, his phone in his hand. He walked through the house a flash of the past cursing him in the head, He felt like a little kid again, scanning every corner in his paranoia. His room was so cluttered with everything, that he was sure people with claustrophobia would surely have a heart attack upon entering his room. He turned around, locking the door behind him, before walking around his bed on the right. A chair was wedged between the bookcase and bedside table, he pulled the chair out. When he was younger he wanted to make his room smaller so he pulled the book shelf from the wall halving the room. He climbed over his chair pulling it back in place. Behind the bookshelf was a small window seat that had pillows and various writing materials, his small hiding spot unknown to anyone but himself. He made himself comfortable calling Tubbo for the last time tonight.

Ring…

Ring…

Ring…

Ring…

Ring..

Ring.

Ranboo sighed leaving a voicemail. “Hi Tubbo, um just wondering if you're alright… hope you come back soon.. Call me when you can” Ranboo hung up, letting the phone fall to the floor. He breathed heavily, getting comfortable in the small nook, letting his eyes fall shut.

A smaller Ranboo, around 7 sat in the backyard picking the weeds out of the ground, the sun was high up and he was wearing only a pair of shorts and T-shirt. He looked up taking a glance at the woman inside, Lucille was in one of those moods, earlier she screamed at Ranboo throwing and smashing stuff on the floor in front of him making him clean it up afterwards, she’s now sent him outside in the hot summer sun to sit in the middle of the yard. He wasn’t allowed to move, she wanted to watch him burn. Ranboo sat there knowing she wouldn’t take her eyes off of him until he looked red raw, so he just sat there sitting as still as he could so the sun would hurry up and do its job. Around an hour passed and she was still standing there, Ranboo’s body hurt and was pretty red already, but it was clear to him that she didn’t think it was enough, another hour and he was crying now, feeling lightheaded and in pain. Lucille came outside drinking a beer, she crouched in front of Ranboo handing him the drink, she watched contentedly.
“Can I come back inside mum?” Ranboo asked through his tears, trying to hand the drink back. Lucille shook her head bringing the bottle to Ranboo’s lips, he tried to decline but she grabbed his throat holding down harshly on his pressure points, he cried. The taste was awful and burnt his throat, she got back up, nearly half of the drink gone now.
When she stood back up and Ranboo wished his father would come home quicker. He always wished for his father during the day and mother during the night, but of course the other was always there when Ranboo least wanted it. Ranboo swallowed the bile and closed his eyes, the taste still stuck in his throat. He scrunched up his face, sobbing quietly to himself before being sprayed with water, he couldn’t even react he fell over from his crouched position struggling to cover his face, the beer bottle being dropped to the grass. As nice as the cold water was he also couldn’t breathe with it being shot straight at his face, Lucille was ‘cleansing’ him. She did it whenever she was in her mood. She always thought everyone was out to get her or that demons were gonna attack her family, so she’d wash Ranboo with the hose, he was used to it at that point but he wasn’t prepared this time. When the water shut off he could see his smiling mother, as happy as could be. She picked him up cradling him like a baby, “That's better mon amour, you know mummy loves you right” He hesitated but nodded his head quickly afterwards, hugging his mother. He’d rather this mother, pretending like everything she just did never happened, he’d rather be held and told he’s loved, he’d rather be hurt if that meant, his mother would be back soon.
Even if that meant being destroyed in the process.

The dream shifted, Ranboo was in his old bedroom, before it was full. It was beige and massive, Ranboo was hiding under the bed his old stuffed monkey held in his small clutches. Someone was sitting on the edge of the bed, their legs handed over the side, their heels clacking with the wooden surface as she shifted her legs, Ranboo could hear soft sobbing from above him. Her tights were ripped and her light blue dress had shards of glass caught in the fabric, she dropped a knife to the floor, Ranboo flinched, moving back slightly more. The woman was sobbing, choking back angry sobs, sounding like she was hyperventilating, she muttered in angry sobs. Ranboo inched forward, pity residing in his throat.
“Meré?” The sobbing abruptly stopped, the room fell deathly silent. Ranboo stopped his advancements forwards a fear set in his stomach that threatened to spill upwards. She shifted, turning her feet to the side, even with her movements the silence was painful. Ranboo's heart sped up the fear was catching up to his reasonable side, it took everything in his body to not scream and run away. He couldn’t regulate his breathing, holding it to avoid being too loud. She sobbed. Ranboo released his breath, a loud sigh filling the mostly silent room because of his efforts to contain his hyperventilating breath. Her breath became laboured getting louder and louder, soon she let out a blood curdling scream, Ranboo’s body jumped in shock. Her legs moved around sporadically like she was struggling, she dropped a decapitated bloody head to the floor. Ranboo's hands flew up to his ears, he couldn’t bring his eyes away from the severed body part, nerves and a quarter of the spinal cord sticking out of the condensed and red exposed meat. Ranboo came to realise they look familiar, Ranboo choked back a sob, squeezing his eyes shut, he brought his hand to his mouth the fear turning to bile that he struggled to swallow back down. It was impossible to keep his eyes shut like someone was pulling his eyelids open, he stared back at his own fear, the fear that his mother finally caught him.
The blood ran out like a faucet finding its way towards Ranboo, He shoved his eyes shut only for them to be back open, except this time his perspective changed, he was now staring at his grey and lifeless body on the floor, the blood running dry across the carpet. Where his head would be was a spinal cord layer connected to nothing, Ranboo couldn’t feel his own body the temperature

Ranboo woke up in a panic, slapping his hands over his mouth to stifle the scream that threatened to throw up. He swallowed back the bile in his throat through his ragged breathing. His cool hands connected to the burning hot skin of his neck, he smoothed his hands over the flesh checking if it was still connected. His head was hit with a stabbing pain, making his face scrunch up in pain. From the nook in the wall laid with blankets and pillows, Ranboo sat up from his balled up position. Through the weathered green curtains shone the rays of the rising sun, The sky was blood red. Ranboo groaned, popping his joints in his attempt to get up from the corner. He pulled at his clothes realising he never changed, reluctantly he pulled his shirt over his head while making his way out of the hiding place he’s constructed over the years. He pushed the chair from the book shelf, forging his way out. The room was as he left it, all cluttered and filled within the confined space. Ranboo felt he could breathe easy even with the lack of oxygen, his room gave him a familiar sort of comfort. Ranboo put his phone on charge making his way to the bathroom, locking the door behind him, he dropped his clothes in the washing basket and made a mental note to do the laundry later. He stared at his reflection in the mirror, Ranboo’s eyes were red and puffy, he ran his finger through his knotted hair looking down at the sink. Ranboo ran a finger over the dried blood yet to be washed from the sink, a thought struck his head, he thought of Tubbo all the times he came home covered in the red liquid. Ranboo was really intrigued by what Tubbo did in his spare time though it was hard to think about this boy while naked. Ranboo rubbed his face, groaning.
“Stop being weird” He sighed hopping into the shower, The water was cool on his skin. His hands found his way to his hair pulling at the knotted hair. It was loosely in dreadlocks a hair style he didn’t particularly like but it was better than dealing with his overly curly hair, besides they didn’t look bad he’s actually received a few compliments before. Ranboo pulled at a lock, it was loose and he’s already decided he was going to take them out. The cold water running down Ranboo's back was starting to feel colder than usual like a cold shiver down his spine, making him feel like he was supposed to be doing something. Something important, but nothing came to mind. Ranboo set out to wash himself and get out of the shower, adding more heat to the freezing water. Ranboo wasn’t particularly scrawny nor near anything he found usually attractive in a man's body, his ribs stuck out and his shoulders sat in a weird position. Ranboo rubbed his biceps feeling over scar tissue that’s formed over the years, his legs weren’t any different as well as his sides, but it was fine he never wanted to show off any more skin than long pants and T-shirt can show. He wasn't proud of himself, he never really had anything to be proud about himself before, his parents never really cared. Ranboo slapped his hands to his cheeks, his skin burnt but cooled to the touch of the water. “Stop being so negative,” he said aloud, although no one was listening. Ranboo turned the water off, drawing back the curtain and stepping out of the tub. The mirror was fogged so he didn’t have to worry about catching his reflection. He grabbed a towel hanging from the hook on the wall bringing it to his body to dry off the droplets of water hanging around and squeezing the water out of his hair. Hanging the towel back up, Ranboo left the bathroom searching into his closet for fresh clothes. A knock on Ranboo's door made him jump, maybe a little too much for the soft sound, he pulled his shirt over his head adjusting it to open the door. His mother was standing outside in a pair of fluffy pants patterned with dogs in halloween masks and a tossed-on shirt by the looks of the way it gathered under the dressing gown.
“I made breakfast, come eat” she spoke in a raspy voice, clearly not quenched with the morning coffee yet. Ranboo stared at her for a minute like she was speaking an entirely different language that wasn’t even his native tongue.
“You what?” She gave him a look like ‘are you stupid’ and walking away clearly wanted Ranboo to follow by the way he slowed her walking down the steps in very dramatic strides, glancing over her shoulder every now and then. Ranboo sighs following suit. “Martin Meré” She hummed in response, shoving her hands in her pockets and closing her eyes, not caring she was still walking down the stairs. Ranboo walked a little closer holding a hand out in case he ever needed to catch her. Ranboo guessed he just wasn’t used to someone waking up earlier than he did, and making him breakfast, Tubbo had unpredictable sleeping patterns and looked attractive in the mornings. Ranboo covered his mouth, it was way too early to start that, and weird as well. He glanced over at his mother, tugging at her arm as she reached the bottom step, her eyes opened watching her last step. Ranboo walked beside her into the dining room. Two spots near the window were filled with plates of french toast, a bit of honey and cream, in between was a bowl of fruits. Ranboo took his usual end of table seat while his mother sat next to him with a cup of coffee.
“Do you drink coffee?” She asked, blowing the steam away. Ranboo never particularly chooses coffee as his to go to morning drink, but he never minded a long black every once in a while. He nodded in response, and she smiled getting up from her seat into the kitchen, as she passed Ranboo she placed a hand on his shoulder squeezing it gently. “How do you like it?” She called from the kitchen. Ranboo looked at his breakfast, a smile gaining on his lips, he was happy to see his mother doing so well.
“Black please.” he stabbed his fork at a strawberry that sat in the bowl bringing the sweet berry to his lips. His mother re-entered the room placing a blue mug to the side of his plate, she was still obsessed with blue things. Ever since he was little his mother would love to have everything this very specific baby blue colour to the point he started to call it her calming colour. He used to find rocks in the dirts that resembled that blue colour and give it to her every morning, those days proved to be a day with out the torture of the ‘mother beast’ as he liked to call her moods. Ranboo couldn’t be happier to not have to find blue rocks just so he could have his mother for the day, she was always so unpredictable, and obsessed with certain ideals. He still remembered the nights he’d have to go looking for her because she’d ran off with some crazy idea that she thought was so amazing she had to run around America sharing her thoughts, he’d also remember his father angry driving around looking for his wife, he’d push her in the car calling her crazy and that she’s never going to succeed in life more than she had marrying him. She’d happily try and explain her ideas to him, swinging around in her chair to face Ranboo shoving papers in his face, he’d sit in silence waiting for the downfall to happen. One particular night, his father was so angry at Lucille yelling at her, and it was like a switch turned his mother into some beast. She screamed and began hitting Ranboo's father, he tried calling out to mother to stop, but she just wouldn’t. She got her hands around her husband's neck bashing his head into the window, Ranboo screamed covering his ears with his eyes squeezed shut. The car drove dangerously swerving on the road, next thing Ranboo knew, he watched his father push Lucille out of the moving car, blood dripping from his face, claw marks evident. “Crazy fucking woman” he heard his father say he than turnt around glaring at Ranboo “shut the fuck up! Go get your mother” He stopped the car waiting for the panicking child to get his mother from the side of the road. Even though his father slowed the car before throwing his mother out the car, she was still bloody having been pushed out backwards, hitting the back of her head. The sight of his bruised and bloody mother on the side of the road was still etched into his brain.
Ranboo shook his head, taking a deep breath, taking a sip from his coffee. It was sweet. He looked up at his mother, her hair was tied in a blue bonnet, something he should put his own hair in.
“Maman?” she hummed in response, popping a blueberry in her mouth. “You think you could take my hair out?” she looked up in question, she knew how much Ranboo disliked his wild frizz of curls but she nodded regardless, taking a sip from her mug. She opened her mouth to speak but a loud song played from her phone, her ringtone was something he remembered from his childhood, the guitar riff from ‘I don’t wanna be me’ Ranboo now really knows his mother never changed, she was still the ‘masculine’ woman his father always hated. She gave a hushed apology getting up from the table, to answer her phone outside the room. Ranboo sat in silence finishing his breakfast in the spacious dining room. When she got this job it sure made him happy to not have to deal with her, but it also meant he was alone most of the time during the last of his high school years and university since she bought a house in Florida. Ranboo picked away at his plate listening to his mother’s loud voice through the door, her usual accent he grew up with replaced with a typical Californian one. It weirded him out for the most part, having grown up with a heavy french accent from his father and a pretty Maghreb french accent from his mother, but he supposed that she sounded different regardless from when he was younger, if there was the effect of aging or being on medication he didn’t know. Ranboo found himself picking at his nail beds, but it was too late, his finger nail already had skin and blood bunched up under it. He could taste it in his mouth, he felt like some sort of cannibal finding it soothing to his anxiety’s to pick and eat away at his skin. He took a breath wiping his fingers on a loose napkin and taking a sip from his now lukewarm coffee to wash the taste down. Ranboo was about to get up from the table but his mother walked back in, a neutral expression on her face.
“How much of the news do you watch?” Lucille spoke the Maghreb accent back, Ranboo was a bit confused by the question his mother knew he never wanted to watch or hear the news cause he’d always catch his dad on the big screen.
“Usually just the elections… why?” His mother walked back over to her seat, bringing her chair closer to Ranboo’s. She opened her phone, turning it vertically to a live broadcast of the news. A dark African man stood outside, dressed in warm clothing, his ears red from the cold. He was in front of a closed off highway, a truck behind him smoking from a previous explosion. Lucille turned the volume up.
“Devastating scene here this morning, a fatal accident just under ‘Illawarra highway’ killing three people including an officer and injuring multiple. More news from witnesses” The scream changed to an older lady with tied back blonde hair, her face was round and aged with sunspots, she pushed her sunglasses up.
“Me and my partner were just passing through, like it was such a lovely day and my partner just said to me like ‘oh my god that person just jumped’ and like I look and this girl just jumped out of the truck and this small car is just driving full force towards this massive truck, next thing I saw before the explosion is this poor lady who’d just jumped from the truck hits this little blue car and it just turns red” she spoke with a typical Australian accent, Ranboo could only imagine the horror having to see that in person. His spine shivered at the thought. Ranboo zoned back into a video being shown of a scruffy noirette haired boy, covered in blood, rolling away from the car stumbling to get up and climb over the fence seconds before the collision and explosion happened. He felt awfully familiar to Ranboo. The stream switched to the regular reporters sitting behind a long desk. There was a male and a female sitting next to each other in formal attire. The female spoke in a Brooklyn accent
“The prime suspect of this disaster was created by the villain ‘Toxin’ whom earlier was in an intense car chase with state police” she continued to talk over a video from a helicopter of the car chase. “Who in a desperate attempt to escape created this explosion under the Illawarra highway bridge, and fleeing the scene, police are still searching for this criminal” the last thing Ranboo saw was a photo in the corner of the car chase video, it was a picture of a green eyed noirette hair man. It was Tubbo.
Ranboo felt his heart drop to his fucking feet, he was so sick. The colour drained from his face. Ranboo couldn’t explain the emotion he was feeling.
Lucille stayed silent for a moment before speaking up “I was hoping I could have a break from reporting on ‘Toxin’.” She sighed facing Ranboo “they’ve called me into Arizona tomorrow morning, says it’s urgent” she rested her chin on her palm, her eyes rolling. Ranboo’s breath became hoarse.
“Did- did they catch him?” Ranboo pulled the threads of his shirt from under the table. Ranboo’s mother looked up at him, her eyebrows furrowed, she stared at him like she was trying to figure something out.
“No. They didn’t, unfortunately.” She gave a half shoulder shrug, putting the phone in her pocket. “I told them I wasn’t going to go to Arizona, tomorrow” Her eye twitched, she played it off by pulling a strand behind her ear. Ranboo gave her a look, but shrugged it off.
“I have to go to work.” Ranboo rose from his seat, the thought of Tubbo being in danger, alarmed him but he tried to settle his heart. A gentle rain poured outside, still relatively sunny. Outside the window two crows played in a puddle, splashing their wings in the water. Lucille took a loud sigh, resting her hands in between her thighs, she glanced out the window. The birds sang happily with each other, one of the crows pushed the other one over into the water, its beak finding a weak spot in its wing. The water changed, blood gently flowed around the bird, circling like milk to tea. It cried, slapping a wing in the water while the other bird struggled to remove its beak out of the flesh. Ranboo felt his skin crawl, he turned his head away while his mother just stared. Discomfort settled in Ranboo’s stomach, it was like his body was going into fight or flight. His head wandered to Tubbo, to his jet black hair and striking green eyes. A flutter in his chest made him wake up ‘he was a murderer.’.
Ranboo walked out the room, his head spinning from nausea. The ground below him was like standing on a mary-go-round, he took a deep breath, reaching up to rest a hand on the door handle. Ranboo opened it to the pelting cold outside, He wrapped his coat closer to himself as he made his way to the bus stop.

The bus was late like usual, Ranboo sat on the cold bench watching cars passing by. He never had present enough parents to teach him how to drive, so he was still using public transportation, at the ripe age of 21. He thought of Tubbo, he was younger only by a year and an orphan but he had his licence.
He sighed, shivering from the wind blowing hard against the protective cover of the bus stop, although it didn’t make the temperature any warmer. Ranboo picked at his nail beds, the skin was calloused and ripped from years of unattained anxiety. The Bus squeaked to a stop in front of him, the wheels struggling from the ice on the road. Ranboo grabbed his bag from beside himself and walked up to the door. The usual bus lady stared at him, and he returned a quick smile taking his seat. Two kids sat a row over, one with shiny brunette hair, he had wired headphones in his ear, they were a tangled mess but it didn’t seem to bother the boy one bit. He pushed his round rim glasses up, all his focus on the book he was reading. While the other boy sat next too, kept his attention on his face, glancing at the book every now and then. His black hair was messy and unkept. Ranboo couldn’t help thinking that boy looked exactly like Tubbo, before he knew it, he was staring in the eyes of the Tubbo look-a-like. Ranboo jumped, muttering a small apology, the boy just shrugged leaning his head on his friend’s shoulder. Ranboo gathered his things and got ready to get off at the next stop. The bus jolted to a stop, shoving everyone forward. The glasses boy braced himself on the seat in front of himself, looking up annoyed.
Ranboo got off the bus.