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2016-07-04
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Dates and Desserts

Summary:

Since becoming friends with X, Zero had been roped into doing a lot of activities he’d normally never attempt—from reading for pleasure, to playing chess, to watching human movies, and even sleeping (or as close to ‘sleeping’ as reploids could get, which meant shutting off all systems instead of keeping on one or two background security sensors on like he normally did when recharging. Oddly enough, doing so replenished his energy more efficiently than normal). Zero was surprised to find he enjoyed many of the things X convinced him to try, but eating human food was something completely foreign to him. Yet here he was, sitting in the middle of a human café across from X, gazing down at a menu cataloging a variety of strange pastries he’d never heard of.

During their downtime, X invites Zero out for a sweet treat.

Notes:

As promised, here's some fluff to make up for the last draft I posted. This technically occurs some time after my "A Matter of Caring" fic, but you don't need to read that one to know what's going on in this fic.

Enjoy!

EDIT: This story now has a sequel! Please check out Holidays and Hotsauce.

EDIT #2 ART!!!
- Please look at this adorable sweet painting my friend did of this fic and shower her with praise :') Thank you buddy, my day is made every time I look at this painting!!!

- Please also look at this beautiful sweet artwork Yarisei did!!! Look at those pretty colors and those delicious-looking pancakes!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Zero wasn't even sure how he’d been coaxed into coming to the café with X—one minute they’d been discussing their ever-increasing workload (during which Zero admitted to feeling a little strained)—and the next, X had made Zero promise to take a break with him during their next free-day. Strictly speaking, Reploids only needed to recharge once in a while depending on their energy output and could do without recreational time, but Dr. Cain and X both insisted that the Hunters receive regularly sanctioned days off for the sake of their mental health. Of course, even on ‘free days’ he and X were still on-call for emergencies. Mavericks didn’t take time-off, after all.

But true to his word, on his next free-day Zero made his way to the tiny human café just outside Abel City X described to him the previous week. He gazed warily up at the shop sign, whose name was written out in such complex cursive it was practically illegible, then turned his attention to back the road, waiting for X. Zero didn’t hang around the city much, especially not the human-populated areas. It wasn’t that he made a conscious decision to avoid them, it was just that he never had much reason to go to those parts. The only times he ever made trips to the city was for official business, like cleaning up Maverick activity or patrolling (though on occasion, he ran errands for X).

People passing him on the sidewalk and across the street kept giving him nervous looks, hurrying past and looking tense. He couldn’t blame them; it didn’t look like many Reploids went through the area. Even if they did, the presence of a Reploid obviously made for battle— specifically a Maverick Hunter—always set people on edge, especially in such a quiet neighborhood. It was yet another reason why Zero tended to avoid such places; he knew his presence only served to remind people of the ongoing war and violence that constantly threatened their (temporarily) peaceful lives.

He was starting to regret arriving early when he saw X rounding the corner, still looking back the way he came and waving as though saying goodbye to someone. X turned, and his expression brightened as soon as he caught sight of Zero.

“You’re here early!” X said as soon as he was within earshot.

“So are you,” Zero noted, raising an eyebrow as he saw the bundle of flowers X carried in the crook of his arm.

"I didn’t want to make you wait for me, but it looks like I did anyways.” Noticing Zero’s gaze, he shifted the bouquet of pink, white, and yellow tulips and held them up for inspection. “I was chatting with the owner of the flower shop down the block because I was curious about a particular type she had in her window. I ended up getting some as a gift for an old acquaintance of mine, but I took a little longer than I meant to,” he said, a little embarrassed. “Sorry about that.”

Zero shrugged. “No worries. I wasn’t supposed to be here for another twenty minutes anyways.” He glanced up at the café sign, looking grim. “So…mind telling me why we’re here? I’m assuming you didn’t ask to meet up just so I could help you to drop off some flowers.”

X laughed, shaking his head. “Of course not! Actually…” he bit his lip, “I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite here with me.”

Zero stared blankly at him. “A bite.”

“Yes.”

“As in food.”

“That’s typically what ‘a bite’ means, yes,” X said, failing to suppress another small laugh.

“I don’t eat.”

“I know that, but…I thought you might like to try it,” X said, looking down at the flowers. “You admitted yourself that you were feeling a little overworked lately, I thought it’d be nice if we went out. Er—” X fumbled, rephrasing his sentence. “It’s just that—taking a break and eating out is something humans like to do on their days off, so…I thought it might help you relax too.”

There it was—X’s uncanny knack of noticing whenever Zero was running at less than 100% and his willingness to go out of his way to help him. Having been friends with X for years, Zero really shouldn’t have been surprised by X’s impeccable attention to detail when it came to other people’s feelings and emotional state, but somehow it always managed to catch Zero off-guard when he was the one on the receiving end of X’s compassion and consideration.

“…Alright.”

“Alright?”

“Sure, why not,” Zero shrugged. “Fair warning that this might be a waste of money though, I don’t even know if I even can taste anything.”

“Well it’s about time you gave it a try,” X said grinning.

“Hmm.” The fact that X cared enough to try and help him relax was enough for Zero, but if this would make X happy…well, there couldn’t be much harm in it. “So…I guess we should go in now?”

X nodded, taking the lead and pushing open the café door, closely followed by Zero.

The café’s interior was surprisingly larger than it appeared from the outside. A dozen round, cozy tables were spread out, all evenly spaced apart from one another, each neatly set with two to four matching chairs. Several lamps hung from high ceiling, emitting gentle white light that gave the café an overall cheery, content atmosphere. But as they entered, several diners glanced up at them, a few with wary expressions, and Zero felt a wave of discomfort wash over him again.

A waitress came out of the kitchen at the sound of the door’s chime ringing, pausing as she caught sight of Zero and X, looking them up and down anxiously. “Hello…um, is something the matter?” she said uncertainly, as though expecting them to announce they were about to blow up the building (which, given Zero’s track record of dealing with Mavericks, wasn’t too far of a stretch). However, before either of them could say anything, another older woman exited the kitchen, looking entirely unsurprised at the sight of two Reploids standing in the entryway of the café.

“No need for concern, that’s just X,” the old woman said, shooing away the waitress as she shuffled over to them. She looked sternly at X, crossing her arms and raising her chin, managing to strike an almost formidable stance despite being shorter than both Reploids. “Well, well, well. Long time no see, X. I was beginning to think that you’d grown tired of my cooking.”

X seemed unfazed by the woman’s unfriendly demeanor. “I’m afraid I’ve just been caught up at work lately.”

“Hmph!”

He held out the bouquet of flowers to her, adding, “I hope you’ll accept these as an apology for not having time to stop by.”

For a moment, Zero thought the old woman was going to refuse the flowers (or shove them back in X’s face) but slowly her expression softened, her pursed lips relaxing into a reluctant smile. She took the bouquet from him, chuckling. “Well, aren’t you a charmer. I suppose I can’t turn down such a sweet gift, even if I am a little disappointed you haven’t visited for the past few months. Well, I guess it’s just as important for you to keep people safe. Still—!” she wagged a finger at him. “A good meal is vital to maintaining your health! Reploid or no, it’s important to sit down, relax, and enjoy some nice home-cooking.”

“That’s what we’re doing today,” X replied, returning the woman’s smile warmly.

“Good. I’ll make sure to prepare whatever you order today myself.” The old woman turned her attention to Zero, a hand on her hip. “Now who’s this young fellow you brought with you today?”

“Ah, this is my partner, Zero. He’s also a Maverick Hunter. Zero, this is Camilla, the owner of this café.”

“Hey,” Zero said, nodding a little stiffly (introductions weren't his forte).

The woman gave Zero a critical look. “My, aren’t you flashy-looking. Back in my day, Reploids were built simply for utility’s sake, without any of this gaudy nonsense making them look like some rich kid’s sports car. Ah well, you are a Maverick Hunter after all. I suppose I should be grateful you're not part spider or part slug or part whatever it is they cook up these days.”

Zero raised an eyebrow, while X made a coughing noise that sounded suspiciously like a muffled laugh.

“A-anyways, I brought him here to try some of your famous sweets.”

“This is his first time eating hmm? Ha! If he tries my cooking, it’ll ruin him for all other food!” She winked at Zero. “No other desserts come close to mine! Why do you think X used to come in so often? That being said, I can’t cook savory things to save my life. You’re better off somewhere else for those sorts of dishes.”

She motioned for them to follow her. Behind her back, Zero looked at X, eyebrow still raised. “She’s rather…eccentric.”

X laughed. “Sorry, she’s always like that. Don’t take it to heart,” he said as they followed the old woman, who guided them to a two person table near a window. “Dr. Cain took me here once while we were building some of the first Reploids; this is one of the few places from back then that’s still around. Camilla’s mother owned the café when I first came to it actually. I’ve been coming here once in a while ever since, though Dr. Cain doesn’t come with me much anymore since he’s been having health problems that make it difficult for him to go outside...” X trailed off.

Camilla shook her head as the two Reploids sat down. “Feh! That man used to have more spark to him. Sure, you can blame it on his age, but you don’t see my age stopping me from running my shop! Take today for instance; I wasn’t going to come in because my arthritis has been acting up, but if I had taken the day off, I would’ve missed seeing you two. I’ll be darned if a little joint pain keeps me down!” She made a wide sweeping motion with her arm, accidentally batting a diner upside the head with the bouquet she still held in one hand. “Whoops, sorry about that dearie. Well, I’d better put these in some water.” She pulled two decorative menus from the pocket in her apron and set them on the table before X and Zero. “Go ahead and look over the menu boys, and let me know once you’re ready. I highly recommend the berry compote pancakes. It’s a new addition, but they’re already quite popular.” With that, she shuffled off, leaving Zero and X alone with the menus and with a few curious stares from neighboring diners (who turned away as soon as Zero shot them a look).

X picked up his menu and opened it, Zero following suit as he said, “I never knew you regularly ate out.” He knew X ate occasionally in the Hunter cafeteria, which primarily existed for the few humans that worked in the Maverick Hunters Headquarters, but specifically going out just to eat wasn’t a typical Reploid activity (though X could hardly be considered a typical Reploid by any standard, not just when it came to his dietary habits).

“I only come every two or three months. Though as I said, I haven’t really had a chance to stop by recently because of all the Maverick activity and Sigma and…actually, because of everything that’s been happening lately.”

“So you’re using me as an excuse to get your monthly sugar fix?” X looked offended, but before he could speak, Zero raised a hand. “I’m kidding, X.”

X huffed, a little pink in the face. “I just thought trying something new would be nice way to get your mind off of work. You have a tendency to overwork yourself, after all.”

“The same goes for you,” Zero pointed out.

“Yes, but I know when I need to take a break, whereas certain individuals tend to push themselves until they’re quite literally falling apart,” X countered coolly.

Well, he couldn’t argue with that. Zero avoided responding by taking a look at his menu. It was short, only listing about twelve or so items in the same cursive script that was on the sign of the café. Parfaits, pancakes, pies, milkshakes, waffles, custards, tarts…hmm.

“Isn’t this dessert food? What humans eat after their main course?”

X sheepishly looked over the top of his menu at Zero, a little embarrassed. “Strictly speaking, yes. Occasionally humans eat this as a meal itself but…I thought you might enjoy trying sweet food first.”

“Is that the kind of food you like?”

X grinned. “Some might say I have a sweet-tooth, yes.”

The corner of Zero’s mouth quirked up in a smile. Cute. “Somehow, that seems very fitting.” He set the menu back down on the table. “Well, I have no idea what any of this stuff is beyond the definitions and photos pre-loaded into my data bank, so as a dessert connoisseur, what do you recommend?”

X set his menu down as well, folding his hands together. “Actually, I was trying to figure that out on the way here. You’ve never eaten anything before, so I can’t even make a guess on whether or not you’d like fruity desserts or creamy ones better. Personally, I like trying something different every time I come here, though I do prefer desserts that have a variety of things in them.”

“Haven’t you boys decided what to order yet?” Camilla asked as she approached their table, a pad and pen in hand.

“Not yet,” X shook his head. “I’m still trying to figure out what might be the best thing for my friend to try first.”

“We could always get what you recommended earlier, the…compote pancakes?” Zero said uncertainly.

“That’s an excellent choice. I’ll have those right out for you two in a few minutes.” The old woman swept away their menus and disappeared through the curtain at the back of the café to the kitchen.

“I think those will be a good introduction to food for you; pancakes compote have a mix of berries and cream, and they have a sort of cake-y texture.”

“I’m not even sure I have the programming to taste things,” Zero pointed out for the second time that morning, grimacing. He’d hate for X’s efforts to go to waste (but even if they were, maybe X would at least be content that he agreed to leave the Hunters HQ and take a break for the day).

X gave him a patient smile, humming softly. “Well, here’s our chance to find out, hmm?”

Zero made noncommittal sigh, but chose not to say anything.

 


 

Their food arrived fifteen minutes later, carried out from the kitchens by a waitress who set the plates before the two Reploids before quickly scurrying off. Three pancakes, each about four inches in diameter, were stacked neatly in the center of the plates. The pancakes were each separated with a layer of cream and fruit, the last one topped with a thick dollop of whipped cream and a fat juicy red strawberry. Lightly drizzled syrup adorned the edge of the plate in a flower pattern, and a small decorative yellow fruit cut in the shape of a star lay on the corner with a sprig of mint next to it. All in all, the meal was so artistically set it looked more like a work of art than something meant to be consumed (not that Zero was versed well enough in either to say for sure).

X looked delighted. Zero was teetering somewhere between alarmed and curious, but they were already here, so…he might as well try it.

“Remind me why you like eating these sort of things?” Zero gestured at his plate of pancakes drenched in whipped cream, syrup, and assorted fruit. “We’re Reploids, we get all the energy we need from solar power.”

“Just because we don’t need something in order to function doesn’t necessarily mean we shouldn’t ever try it,” X replied, waving his fork at Zero. “Look at humans—they don’t need things like music and art, but it enhances their lives and makes it all the more worth living!”

“Eating this pancake will really enhance my life that much, huh?” Zero said, trying hard not to smirk.

“Just try it, Zero.”

Zero obliged, cutting off an uneven chunk of the fluffy dessert. X watched expectantly as he uncertainly popped the piece in his mouth, chewing slowly. The texture was…weird. Soft and a little sticky, but what stood out to him most was the flavor. 

“It’s…sweet,” he noted, the corresponding word for the impression presenting itself readily in his mind. Huh. So he was programmed to taste things after all.

X beamed. “It’s good right?”

Zero grimaced, swallowing the bite with some trepidation. “It’s certainly mushy.”

“Well since you are a Reploid, you could probably get away with not chewing,” X said, chuckling, “But breaking down food helps our bodies process it easier. Not that our inner-structures function the same way human’s do; food gets processed as biofuel and burned up when we ingest it. Or at least, that’s how my systems manage it.”

“So it’s treated like excess energy.” He paused for a moment as his body processed the nutrients. “No—it’s more like external energy, like the E-tanks HQ has,” Zero reasoned, taking another bite of his food. Alright, the second bite wasn’t so bad.

“More or less,” X nodded, eating a piece of his own pancake.

“After what you said earlier, I can sort of understand why Dr. Light put in the extra effort to let you taste things. It makes you more likely to seek out and identify energy sources that can revitalize you and give you an edge over opponents.” Zero paused, another pancake bite halfway to his mouth. He looked hard at X, as though analyzing him, then rested his head on the hand not holding his fork. “…No. It’s more likely Dr. Light gave you that feature purely so that you could understand human culture better.”

“I’d like to think so,” X said softly. “I suppose the energy boosts were just a side effect, though I can’t say I’ve ever tried carrying around a sandwich with me while battling.”

“It might not be a bad idea,” Zero said, smirking as he directed his fork to his mouth, chewing thoughtfully. “Seems like unnecessary programming though, at least on my part.”

“Maybe your creator wanted you to experience the sensations of humanity too?”

Zero frowned down at his food. “Somehow, I doubt that,” he muttered, spearing a strawberry. “I’m pretty sure my main directive was just to fight. That’s it.”

A look of concern crossed X’s face. The mystery surrounding Zero’s past and creator was a touchy subject, and X knew better than to try and breach it. Still, X could always tell when his guard went up, and Zero knew it troubled his friend to see him agitated like this. He felt bad for getting moody when X had taken him out specifically to get his mind off stressful matters.

Resolved to remedy the situation, Zero stabbed another fruit—something yellow, he wasn’t really paying attention—and popped it into his mouth just as X said, “Ah, Zero wait—!”

It was like his mouth was being assaulted; multiple corresponding descriptions, sensations, and identifications for the sensations recognized and logged all in a matter of milliseconds. Bitter, zesty, citrus, acidic, but above all else, sour. He spat out the offending fruit, his sensors identifying it as a lemon. From the corner of his eye, he saw people from neighboring tables throwing him disapproving looks.

X covered his mouth, trying to quash his laughter. “I’m s-sorry, Zero, I tried to w-warn you, it’s just a decoration, you aren’t supposed to—to eat it!” He gave up trying to hold it in, holding himself as he laughed, shoulders shaking. The other diners were definitely staring at them now, but Zero didn’t care.

“Laughing at me in my time of need, thanks X.”

“I’m sorry," he said, trying to catch his breath. "It’s just your face—”

“Making fun of my face now? Wow.”

“Oh hush. I’ve never seen you make that expression before! You looked so serious and then your face sort of scrunched up and it was so cute—”

Zero crossed his arms and turned away, trying to look as insulted and dignified as possible.

“Aw, don’t be like that! Come on, Zero! Look, here—I’ll try it too, that way we’ll be even, ok?”

Zero glanced back in time to see X take a bite out of the star-shaped lemon piece. Just as he had described Zero’s face, X’s scrunched up, nose wrinkled and tongue sticking out as he grimaced. Zero let out a small breath of laughter as X grabbed his napkin and discreetly spat the lemon into it.

“Bleh…I’ve never been a big fan of sour food.”

“I can see why. Glad we didn’t start with that.”

“Thankfully for you, I’m not a sadist. I think that would be a little too cruel,” X said, cutting a piece of his pancake and dipping it in syrup. “I will say the one good thing about sour food is that it always makes sweet things taste better.”

Zero dunked a piece of pancake in his syrup as well. “That almost sounds like some kind of human saying. ‘You must weather the sour moments in life before reaching the sweet ones’ or something.”

“Well if the last few weeks have been sour,” X smiled warmly at him, “then this is definitely a sweet moment.”

 


 

“Here’s your bill, boys,” Camilla said half an hour later once Zero and X’s plates were cleared and both Reploids were comfortably chatting about past missions. “How’d you like the meal?”

“It was wonderful,” X said just as Zero said; “Good except for the lemon.” They looked at each other and grinned.

“Well I’m glad to hear it,” she said, putting the check down. “Not that I’m surprised—they don’t call my café the best dessert shop for nothing!”

X picked up the check, but stopped the older woman as she began walking off. “Ah, wait a moment! I think you undercharged us,” X said, pointing out a line on the bill.

“Afraid not. It’s the weekend, dear, I gave you the couples’ discount. You did say you were partners after all, didn’t you?”

X blushed so badly Zero was surprised he didn’t start glowing.

“A-actually, we aren’t partners. I mean we are, but not in that sense. That is to say, we’re not—” he fumbled, vehemently refusing to make eye-contact with Zero.

“Oh?” Camilla raised an eyebrow, looking from X to Zero. “Pity. Well regardless, you’re a good customer, X. I’ll still give you the discount, provided you bring your friend with you again next time you visit.” She winked at Zero, and without waiting for a response, she turned and walked off, leaving them alone with an awkward silence stretching between them.

“I’ll get the bill this time.” Zero slid the digitized bill over to his side and swiped a hand over it, transferring funds automatically. Hunters were paid for their work, even though hardly any of them used their money, Zero included, so he had a fair sum saved up.

“I’m sorry about that,” X laughed awkwardly. “She means well, I’m sure.”

Zero shrugged. “I heard it’s common for older humans to play matchmaker.”

“Yeah…” X paused, rubbing the back of his neck. “Well…Despite the lemon incident and, er, that, did you enjoy your first dining experience?”

“It was great.” Zero flashed him a smile. “Thanks X, I had fun. Now I know why you were so adamant about bringing me here. I think I might just have to tag along next time you plan to eat out.”

The color that had just started to fade from X’s cheeks rose once more, but he beamed. “I look forward to it.”

Notes:

Thanks for reading! Haven't decided which fic of the 7 I have in mind I want to work on next, but it will likely be a "canon expansion / character analysis" one, so keep your eye out for that.

Fun behind-the-scenes fact: For the life of me, I couldn't figure out how to describe what a lemon tasted like, and in a fit of desperation / frustration, I went into the kitchen, cut a big chunk out of a lemon, and started chewing on it. I like sour food, but that was definitely not an experience I want to repeat anytime soon.