Work Text:
{Mafuyu/Gemini POV:}
Quiet. The palace had always been quiet. The palace had always felt empty. But somehow, tonight, it felt emptier. All the windows were closed. They always were. The guards stayed camped outside the door, but there was less security than normal. Lonely. I felt lonely. And that’s what I was. I loved being alone; my alone time was the only good thing I had in this world besides my books, my music, and my three friends. And yet I still hated how I felt. I felt small, almost like I was nothing. Because to most, I wasn’t anything. The longer I lived, the more apparent that was. I wasn’t allowed outside of the palace, apparently, for the safety of the country’s future heir to the throne.
Most people either didn’t know or didn’t believe I existed, and they wouldn’t know until I reached the legal age of eighteen. Until then, I was locked up in the bullshit room, stuck with my bullshit family, and leading a bullshit life in this bullshit palace. Three more years, and I would be revealed as an actual human being, not just a shadow of a prince or a rumor carried by the wind, not truly existent, not truly present, but still there. Kinda. But not really. Bullshit. That’s all my life was. All it will ever be. All–
Knock. Knock. Knock. I look to my left to see my friend, Seraph, smiling at me through my now open window.
“What do you want, sir prince?” I asked sarcastically. If Seraph was anything to me, he was like an annoying older brother—a stupid one.
“I wanted to see you,” he said, to which I mentally gagged, “I had to avoid so many of those guards just to get here. Can I come in?”
“You may.”
“You seem tired.”
“It’s two am. Of course, I’m tired. I can’t sleep because my brain refuses to allow me the sweet relief of resting and not having to talk to anyone, or look at anyone, or be near anyone, or do work, or pretend to do work. It’s running on nothing but gears and an engine or something. The only peace I have right now is my music. But goodness, today was exhausting.” In short, work was all I did today. I had to attend eight meetings and learn from the many tutors my brother hired for me. He was the ruler of the kingdom and the boss of me. He temporarily, permanently grounded me, again, for my safety. I mean, technically, by law, I was already temporarily permanently grounded, but he tweaked those rules and made them stricter. I couldn’t leave the premises of the Palace and am only allowed outdoors if outdoors is the garden. I couldn't go in the eyes-view of anyone; the few people I had met lived on or near the premises of the palace. It was stupid. It was miserable.
Then Seraph started, “What were you thinking about, and was it me? Was it my charming smile? Was it the fact that–”
“You know you’re gonna get yourself killed one of these days. You get caught practically every time you come here. The guards out there, they like you, but they like their jobs more, and they would rather enforce the rules and laws we have than give up their only source of income. And I’d rather not lose you. You’re very dear to me, and you know that. You’re one of my only friends. My own family hardly even talks to me. I’m just some kind of side-character to them. You understand me. It’s nice having someone who understands me. Someone who listens to me and sees me as a real person. And I don’t wanna lose that person, so you should stop coming here.”
“You talk a lot. And if I stopped coming, your life would be shit.”
“It already is.”
“That is a good point.”
“Okay. Now leave. Let me at least try to sleep for the two hours I have before I have to begin my royal studies again.”
“Will do. Sleep well.”
“I’ll try.”
Hungry. I was hungry. Bullshit.
— — — —
Two hours have never felt shorter. Turn me over and fuck me sideways. On my mother, I hate my life. Kill me now.
“Your Highness. It is time for you to wake up. Duty calls.” If there is anything I hate more than my life, it’s formalities. Stupid, stupid formalities. “You know, if you stay in bed sulking, your life won’t get any easier,” the maid says.
“Ughhhhh…on everything, I hope the sun explodes.” In all honesty, the maid wasn’t all that bad. She was one of the more involved people in my life. My sad, lonely, depressing, workaholic, sleep-deprived life. She was nice. And respectful of my privacy and my property, and my feelings. She could read me like a book. And she knew just how shitty I really felt. Which was very shitty. Sometimes I just wish I could be a more normal person who had a normal family who didn’t keep me locked up in the same large and spacious and yet claustrophobic palace. I could have all the space in the world, and I would still feel so trapped. In this palace and my brain. How I hate my brain. It’s stupid. This is stupid. Kill me now.
— — — —
5 hours. 5 whole, entire hours of nothing but laws. Did they want me to memorize this shit? Because my brain might just overload and die. And then I’ll explode, and life will be happy. For everyone else, at least. Studies being so overwhelmingly underwhelming is an understatement. My brain is mush. I hate being privileged. If this can even be called privileged. This is all just stupid.
“…Mr. Hitori, are you listening? Your Highness? Prince Mafuyu!”
“Yes sir?” I said rather annoyed.
“Do you not realize how important this is? This is the history of our country, our nation, your family. And you can’t even pretend to care?”
Bullshit.
“I don’t care and I’m not going to pretend to care about all of this. My life isn’t even me life. If it never has been. It’s the life of my parents and my brothers but it’s not the life I want to lead. I want to get out there and do something. I want to talk to people and find new hobbies and make friends like a normal person I get that I’m not normal but can’t I at least pretend? Besides, I already know this stuff I’ve been told at least a hundred times.”
“And you’ll be told a million more times because it is what is required of us to teach you. For a prince, you sure are annoying.” He mumbled the last part, not like I really cared whether or not he thought I was worthy of being royalty. I didn’t choose it and I didn’t want it. It was impossible for me to ever really be it and I’ve accepted that. What bothered me was the fact that he had the audacity to say it right in my face. I didn’t say anything of it because I would get in trouble and I’m supposed to be some golden child or whatever. Being my age — it’s bullshit. Just like everything else was.
SEUNGBERRYATEDOWN Thu 13 Nov 2025 03:01AM UTC
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sugar_crunch_99 Sat 15 Nov 2025 10:34PM UTC
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dmQJfN7GhZ1zuRUyzqEXG0DiiX (Guest) Sun 23 Nov 2025 09:40PM UTC
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