Chapter Text
November, 1943 (Front Lines)
'400 PRISONERS LIBERATED' – A newspaper on the table showed the heading in bold font, illuminated by the light of the lamp that covered the second half of the report. A man was sleeping on the bed near the table, his long lashes touching his cheeks as he snored softly, one arm hanging over the side.
He gave a slight twitch, and something heavy flew through the air right at his face.
'Argh! Wha- What happened – what's-' He stammered, sitting up quickly, blinking rapidly, whipping his head around to see where it had come from. He looked down on his bed – it was an empty duffel bag.
On the other side of the room, he saw his best friend, the Sergeant Barnes, hunched over himself, laughing his ass off. Annoyed, Steve threw the duffel bag back at him, but of course Bucky caught it annoyingly fast – he had always had good reflexes.
'Was that really necessary?' Steve asked, rubbing his eyes with one hand and picking up the newspaper with the other.
'Yeah you scream like a little girl – and there's nothing in there. They're just going mad after your involvement. Nothing else.' Bucky said, indicating the newspaper while stuffing something into his bag.
'Jerk.' Steve muttered, but nodded anyway, before his eyes fell on what Bucky was doing.
'New orders came in?' He asked hesitantly, noting the dark circles under Bucky's eyes, and the little twitch he gave while moving his right shoulder every time.
'Yes – you are supposed to report at the office at 7, and I have to go through a medical exam before we're assigned anywhere else.'
'They're pulling us back?' Steve frowned, not liking the flat tone Bucky was talking in, especially about the medical exam. He knew Buck didn't like getting fussed over, especially now that he had suffered God-knows-what at the hands of Hydra. He had still refused to talk about it at all. It bothered Steve more than he liked to admit.
'Yes, just the 107th. Most of us who came back yesterday.' Bucky said uncomfortably. Steve frowned worriedly – what the hell had happened there? Why was Bucky refusing to talk to him about it? And the way he was avoiding his eyes and refusing to look in his general direction was making Steve angry and scared in equal measures.
'Right. Right… Buck – what hap-?'
'Stop.' Bucky cut him off immediately, stilling his hands. Steve gulped as he noticed how Bucky's jaw had tightened immediately and he no longer looked calm. It was worrying Steve to hell and back – Bucky had never had to hide anything from him. Anything.
But as he watched his best friend's hands tremble slightly, and his breathing hitch, he decided something. He couldn't push Bucky about this – it was too sensitive a topic. Steve had never had to push Bucky into talking – he pretty much always did it himself. Actually, he was the one who Bucky had to normally coerce into talking openly.
Even so, it was no less worrying when they spent the next five minutes in silence, Bucky shifting to sit on his camp bed and taking deep breaths. Calming breaths. It was that, if nothing else that made him realize that it was probably something worse than he could have imagined. It opened up a pit of fathomless worry in his stomach – he was almost on the verge of panicking.
After a few minutes of watching him, Steve poured a glass of water and handed it to Bucky, putting an arm around his shoulder. It was still slightly shaking. He gripped harder. They had never been much touchy feely with each other, but Bucky had given him lots of hugs when the situation warranted, so Steve didn't feel even a little bit awkward holding Buck to his side. Squishing him as hard as he could, comfortingly.
'I won't ask you again, I won't push you, Buck – you know me. But I'm here. Whenever you feel like talking – I'll be here. All you have to do is say the words. Alright?'
He hoped he wasn't making a mistake when he next said – 'Y'know what? You can skip physical if you want to – only for today. I'll talk to the doctor, and you'll have to stay here another day, but no needles for today. How's that sound?'
'About time you returned some favors.' Bucky said weakly, even though his voice shook slightly. Steve knew he was grateful – he just wouldn't say it. Bucky tapped his hand with his lightly – 'thanks for that' – before giving him a slightly wobbly smile.
'And I'm not going to go home anyway. There's nothing there for me anymore. The punk I need a holiday to see is already stuck by my side here.' Bucky said again, with a little more tease to his voice, that gets Steve chuckling. That sounds better.
Steve started to move away to start packing his stuff, while Bucky sipped some water in thought. It was about two minutes later that he talked again.
'I might go to see Mom if the physical says I need rest. Is that okay with you?' He asked, and Steve only picked up a slight hesitance in his tone – Bucky was trying to be nonchalant about it, but Steve knew him too well.
It threw him off for a second – Bucky had never wanted a break ever. Even in his letters to him and his Mom, he was almost always insistent to stay on the lines, no matter if he got shot or anything like it. Steve tried not to think on it anyway – his Mom must think he was dead or something so it makes sense to see her anyway. He was just over thinking it. Yeah.
'Yeah, of course. What – you think I can't handle being Captain America for a day without my sidekick?' Steve said jokingly, and Bucky snorted – 'I am not your sidekick.'
'You sure about that, Buck? I sort of am the hero, y'know.' Steve continued, trying to keep Bucky busy so that he was distracted from whatever was going on inside his head.
It worked for the most part – Bucky kept laughing and indulging him in short banter, asking about Peggy – 'Who was that brunette you were flirting with?' – before Steve blushed, hard, and Bucky looked like he would piss his pants laughing.
They packed up their things and headed out together eventually and it was the first time Steve was finally in the army – by Bucky's side, just like he had always dreamt.