Show-don't-tell is quite an active effort that really only works when I'm in the revision stage. I didn't formally identify it for myself until you put it into words, but you're completely right; I don't find descriptions / narration interesting until it really is incorporating the cultural / emotional lens of the viewpoint character. That's when I think narration is the strongest. I'm flattered that it was something that stuck out to you! That also puts on some pressure to make sure to keep up that quality! I think I'm up for the challenge...when I don't sleep-deprive myself, haha!
And wow, thanks for the feedback! I'll keep that in mind. I've got to sleep now, so I'll literally be sleeping on it to figure out how to make the delineation between narrator/character work out better there. :) Lmk about anything else you find awkward / not working well as well! :D
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WithPatienceComesPeace on Chapter 2 Mon 14 Dec 2020 07:17AM UTC
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