Comment on Without All The Nuance

  1. Solstice (Guest) on Chapter 1 Sat 24 Aug 2024 07:25AM UTC

    It's just a self-indulgent completion thing. I'm going to give it a try after I've earned the platinum trophy for a third time, as a sort of farewell to the game. I probably won't actually play it again for awhile since I've seen most of what it has to offer.

    I published a couple of fics to AO3 last year in March, then deleted them soon after. Even though the fandom's work page was archived, the actual links to my works aren't accessible, meaning they're gone forever (and I didn't make backups). It sucks, but it's my own fault for not valuing my work enough to think it's worth keeping. I've deleted so much stuff, and I genuinely feel bad whenever I think about how much I could've added to the fandom if I kept everything.

    I didn't post anything during my fan week since I procrastinated pretty hard, but if I can find a backup of the prompt list I made, I might revisit it later!

    All I have right now is various WIPs for a multi-chapter Sol/Sym fic that I'm writing out of order and some Sol/Tang stuff that I wrote months ago. One of the Sol/Tang fics was for a Femslash February prompt that I planned to make part of a series to give the fandom more sapphic content, but then I just... kind of gave up on it.

    As for the fandom, though, I enjoyed taking part in it and talking with everyone! There's so many nice people, and while I unfortunately didn't make any friends, I still think about some of the conversations I had.

    Maybe when my mental health is sorted out and I feel comfortable socialising again, I'll go back to Tumblr. I have so much to discuss when it comes to Exocolonist.

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    1. MoonBugs9058 on Chapter 1 Sat 24 Aug 2024 08:38AM UTC

      I often find that when I stop liking the fics I write, there are people out there who enjoyed them enough to comment, leave kudos, or bookmark. I always feel bad when I consider deleting them because I know how bad it sucks to look through your bookmarks and see "this work as been deleted" and just go "aw man i wonder what that was :(" Instead, my alternative to completely getting rid of them is to change them to an anonymous author so those people can still enjoy them without it being traced back to me. It probably won't happen with these fics or the other fics on my profile because I am rather proud of them at the moment (especially the two Tammy/Cal stories), but that's generally what I end up doing. (I have a total of 21 published fics, and only 8 of them aren't anonymous; which tells you wonders about my self confidence.) Whenever I under value my own work, I always try to remember that even if only one person left kudos or cared enough to comment, then it's worth keeping around, even if I don't want it tied to me.

      I haven't actually engaged with the fandom on Tumblr much, though I have posted about this fic, but I've seen a lot of brilliant art and headcanons, so I know the fandom is wonderful. The extent of my interactions with the fandom is actually just here on AO3; with you and other commenters, because I do try my best to reply somewhat meaningfully to every comment I receive.

      Don't rush yourself when it comes to your mental health and self-confidence! You're just as important as the ideas you have :)
      Take care and thank you again for commenting and letting me know that you enjoy the fic :D

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