Chapter 1: Donut Cake
Chapter Text
"I cannot believe you are eating cake for breakfast," Loki says, eyeing Tony's plate.
"It's not just any cake,” Tony corrects. “It's a donut cake."
"Have you any sense of nutrition?"
"I have a sense of taste. And this tastes amazing.”
Chapter 2: Pop Rocks
Chapter Text
"What sorcery is this?" Loki's eyes widen.
Tony chuckles. "No sorcery, just Pop Rocks."
"Are they supposed to attack the palate like this?"
"Yep."
Chapter 3: Sugared Violets
Chapter Text
"This one tastes like flowers," Loki muses.
"That's because it was made from actual flowers," Tony replies, and pops another sugared violet into his mouth.
"What kind of flower is this?"
"I have no idea," Tony admits. "I just saw the word 'edible' and went for it."
Chapter 4: Sour Gummy Worms
Chapter Text
"I do not understand how you eat these things, Anthony," Loki says, grimacing.
"It's all about the balance," Tony explains. "Too much sweet and it's cloying. Too much sour and your face implodes. But when you find that perfect blend, it's like a symphony in your mouth."
"I prefer my symphonies with a good deal less citric acid," Loki replies dryly.
Chapter 5: Chocolate Truffles
Chapter Text
Tony hands Loki a chocolate truffle. "This is the best thing you'll ever taste."
Loki pops it into his mouth and raises an eyebrow.
"Interesting," he says thoughtfully, and swallows. "It tastes like someone mixed chocolate with Asgardian dirt."
Chapter 6: Lace Cookies
Chapter Text
"These cookies are out of this world," Tony says through a mouthful of deliciousness.
"They are from a bakery in Paris," Loki informs him. “It says so on the box.”
Chapter 7: Rainbow Lollipops
Chapter Text
"This tastes like childhood memories," Tony says, savoring a lollipop. “Try it.”
“I have no wish to relive my childhood memories.”
"No wonder you're so bitter," Tony teases. "You never had any candy."
Loki shrugs, accepting the lollipop. “Making up for lost time then.”
Chapter 8: Chocolate Bars
Chapter Text
"I heard chocolate is good for stress," Tony says, breaking off a piece of a chocolate bar.
"I would not know," Loki replies, but he takes the piece anyway. "I am never stressed."
"Right, and I'm not a billionaire playboy philanthropist."
Chapter 9: Cotton Candy
Chapter Text
"This is a classic fair treat."
Tony holds up a piece of cotton candy. Loki peers at it skeptically.
"It resembles a cloud that has been dyed pink."
Tony laughs. "Close enough. Give it a try."
Chapter 10: Cotton Candy (II)
Chapter Text
"But where did it go?" Loki asks plaintively. "I only just took a bite, and now it is gone!"
Tony is laughing too hard to answer.
Chapter 11: Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches
Chapter Text
"I do not want to like these," Loki complains through a mouthful of bread. "Thor likes these."
Tony grins, entirely unsympathetic.
Chapter 12: Jawbreakers
Chapter Text
Tony holds up a brightly colored sphere. "All right, Lokes, prepare for a whole lot of nothing but sugar."
As Loki suspiciously eyes the candy, Tony adds, "It's called a Jawbreaker, and trust me, it's the closest thing we have on Earth to enduring eternity."
Chapter 13: Licorice
Chapter Text
Tony extends a stick of licorice. "Here, try this. It's called licorice. It's like a candy that hates itself but can't stop being delicious."
Loki's eyes narrow suspiciously as he cautiously takes a bite.
"I see why it hates itself," he agrees, and takes another.
Chapter 14: Gummy Bears
Chapter Text
"This looks nothing like a bear," Loki says doubtfully. "It's vivid. And gelatinous."
"Gummy," Tony deadpans. "Just try it."
Loki does.
"It tastes nothing like a bear, either," he pronounces, and spits the mangled sweet into a napkin.
Chapter 15: Chewing Gum
Chapter Text
"What is the purpose of this?"
"You just chew it."
"And then?"
"And then you keep chewing it."
Loki spits the gum out.
Chapter 16: Candy Canes
Notes:
In response to a prompt from @unusedname8 😊
Chapter Text
"They... taste cold?" Loki’s nose wrinkles. "But are not actually cold...?"
Tony grins, breaking off a piece of his own stick with his teeth. "That's the magic of candy canes."
Magic. Loki thinks for a moment.
The red stripes shimmer for a moment and turn green.
"There," he says, pleased. "I wonder whether I could-"
"No," Tony cuts in quickly. "No pranks, no magic, no nothing. Just eat them. Yum-yum. They're just for eating."
"You have no vision, Anthony."
Chapter 17: Hot Chocolate and Whipped Cream
Notes:
Another one for @unusedname8 (:
Chapter Text
“Clouds don't taste like this," Tony explains, squirting a generous dollop of whipped cream onto the surface of the pale brown drink. "But they should."
"O- oh.”
"Good, huh?"
"Oh," Loki murmurs happily.
Tony beams, reaching for a bottle of liquor. "Hold on a sec, I'm adding some amaretto. Try it now."
"Oh...!"
Chapter 18: Jelly beans
Chapter Text
Tony sighs. "This is gonna take a while, isn't it?"
Methodically selecting another single bean from the enormous pile before chewing it for a moment and then immediately spitting it out, Loki frowns.
"You said that one was cherry," he accuses. "It is nothing like cherries."
"Fifty-two flavors to go, then."
ineedtequila on Chapter 1 Fri 19 Jul 2024 07:38PM UTC
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