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2018-03-22
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2020-01-27
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5 Times Shuri Yelled That The Floor's Lava (And 1 Time Peter Did)

Summary:

Shuri loves games, and one that has never failed to please her is The Floor Is Lava.
When she yells it, she gets results, depending on who is able to hear it, and this time, the results from Peter are just the beginning.
(All relationships so far are more of implied, canon, and/or just kinda there. The relationships are just kinda because I want them there, but they’re in the background a lot more than they are in the MCU. Except for Natasha and Bucky. How rude, in my opinion.)

Notes:

Hey! This is inspired by chapter 14 of The Adventures of Peter Parker and Shuri, written by aceschwarz222. Please go check out that fic and/or the writer, as the fic is very, very funny.
https://archiveofourown.info/works/13893492/chapters/32335128 .

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Movie Night Wreck-It

Chapter Text

"The floor's lava!" Shuri yelled, and that is exactly when it went wrong.

It was movie night, so, of course the princess would decide to wreck this night.

Not intentionally wreck it, but it just so happens that when you have all of the original Avengers, Scott Lang, Sam, Pepper, Peter, Bucky, Wanda, Pietro, Vision, T'Challa, and Shuri gathered to watch a movie and someone yells that the floor is made of lava, some take it seriously, while others...

Bruce knows this game, barely, but it's in his memories of being able to be a child.

Hulk is sleeping in Bruce's head, and thankfully is oblivious.

Tony Stark does not remember the game well, and his facial expression upon seeing that the floor is not, in fact, lava says it all.

T'Challa ignores his sister, as he is used to it.

Steve is confused, but concerned all the same.

Clint jumps onto the couch, barely missing Natasha.

And Natasha was, during that moment, flipping to perch on the back of the couch, her book in one hand, and she quickly found her place again and kept reading.

Thor was standing, and, upon hearing the declaration, used to Loki's tricks, calls his hammer to his side, and leaps onto the counter top, spilling some--thankfully closed--takeout boxes, almost swiping Pepper's drink off the counter, but she moves it just in time, giving Shuri a look, which the princess does not see.

Wanda is swept up in Vision's arms, who floats to avoid the lava that is not there.

Pietro simply zips his way out of the room, none of his teammates seeing his grin.

Shuri, knowing that she was going to say it, came in wearing her shoes that float.

Bucky knows this game, (sort of, since it was a little different in his day,) but he was ready when she called, as usual, and joins Natasha on the back of the couch.

She lets him read over her shoulder.

Scott is regretting not having his suit, but plays along, sitting on his chair with his legs tucked up.

Sam ignores the warning.

And Peter...

Sweet, adolescent Peter does the only thing that comes to mind to escape.

The hero jumps from his spot on the floor, trying to land on the wall, but winds up kicking a very large, very expensive vase off of a shelf and onto the floor, scurrying up until he is peering down at the others sheepishly.

Tony is not worried about the vase, as he thought that it was about time to get rid of it anyway, since it is his least favorite thing in the building--when it comes to decoration, as paperwork still is at the top of the list--but then he sees her face.

Shuri, who is holding her phone to videotape it all, has the biggest, scariest grin Tony Stark has ever seen.

And he knows in that one, terrifying moment that he is going to regret letting the princess visit with her brother, and that if he does not leave now, it will get much, much worse.

Chapter 2: You Best Dodge, Boiii

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Chapter 2:

 

Peter made a mistake.

Yes, a big one, he decides, after he says it.

“Bring it on.”

Shuri is going to get him one day, even if it’s decades from now.

Peter is going to get Nerf’d.

 

 

The training room—inspired by movies about superheroes, because Tony Stark is a humongous geek at heart, even if he denies it—is circular, with what looks like a bunch of metal mounds planted in the sides of the walls, little holes in the middles.

Basically, the mounds look like the blobby things from The Incredibles that—spoilers—basically shoot blobs at Mr. Incredible that almost kill him.

Peter looks at them, wearing his Spider-Man suit, because there is no way he is going up against this thing right now without it—since Shuri helped Tony design it, and Peter learned within the first twenty-five minutes of her arrival that the princess of Wakanda is a (slightly malicious) genius.

And that is why he is wearing his suit.

And that is especially why he is looking through the bullet-proof glass at Shuri’s grinning face ten feet above him and regretting his decision to ignore homework in favor of helping Tony out.

Peter’s mentor appears at the window, staring at a tablet, its screen promptly being turned into a hologram in the air that Stark flips and scrolls through.

“How ya doin, kid?”

“G-good. How are you?”

“Hungry, exhausted, and ready for some lab time. Before I can do that, we need this thing tested. You ready?”

“What am I supposed to do?”

Shuri grins and presses a button on the hologram—getting The Look of Don’t-Touch-My-Stuff from Tony—and a stand comes out of the training room in the middle of the floor, a big, bright, glowing button as red as Peter’s suit planted on top.

“Press that.”

“That’s it?” Peter asks, his voice squeaking.

“Yeah, Underoos.”

“You said there’d be obstacles. Uh, and you want me to click the big, threatening button?”

Shuri grins even wider.

“Just try not to get hit,” Tony says.

“By what?” He asks, and even after they don’t answer, he presses it anyway.

Peter does not expect a bunch of small balls to come out of the holes, nor does he expect them to be so hard.

Unfortunately for him, neither does Tony, who looks like he’s trying to get his eyebrows clear up to his hairline, based on how high his eyebrows are right now, as he was expecting small, rubber balls that are red, not blue like these, and these look like they’re a little bigger, and when they hit Peter, they’re supposed to stick, not bounce off.

What did Shuri do?

Shuri is cackling at Peter, who is yelping and jumping for the button, which somehow—and don’t ask him how she managed to sneak this past Tony—is pelting him with Nerf darts as the tower starts to rise, along with about ten uneven platforms.

“The floor’s lava!” Shuri yells, and Peter—poor, terrified Peter—watches in terror as more of the blue balls pour down from the sides of the ceiling.

Stark is too busy trying to figure out who Shuri thinks she is.

She knows that she is a genius, geek, nerd, and prankster.

As well as a—Disney, according to that Deadpool guy—princess, but being a princess doesn’t seem to bring her as much fun as this.

Plus, being a princess in Wakanda means that she has to wear an uncomfy corset during ceremonies, and that is so restricting.

This is way more fun than corsets.

She watches as Peter climbs up a tower and clings for dear life as the rubbery balls flood the room, Nerf darts pelting him, until slowly, they stop, and Peter is surrounded by a sea of Nerf darts and rubber balls.

“You won!” Shuri cheers, and then presses a button, and all the darts and balls either fly or roll out of the room, through a panel in the floor.

“How did you do that?!?” The arachnid-themed superhero asks in genuine curiosity and, for some reason, excitement.

“More like why?” Tony asks her, slightly ticked. “You messed with my stuff, and then my kid?!?”

“The ammo only went up four feet, and even if he was completely submerged, he could breathe. I checked, and I went in three hours ago and did it myself.”

“Without anyone watching?!? Are you trying to start another war? If you get hurt, I’ll have your cat-loving brother dragging something into Wakanda, and it’ll be my body!”

“Friday was watching.”

“I need an aspirin.”

Stark promptly leaves the room, opening the door of the training area to let Peter out, who should be completely distrusting of the princess who is smiling at him, having followed behind Tony.

Instead, Peter is smiling back and asking more questions at a faster rate than Tony would be able to keep up with.

Add how Shuri is busy answering him—something about the Nerf balls being able to roll without going off course, even though they were bumping into each other like mad—and Tony, now knowing that Peter is okay, exits to get some aspirin and then to talk to a certain cat-themed royal member of Wakanda.

Notes:

Have a blessed week!
Also, a really great reader gave me permission to share a comment.
"... FYI no one knows when kids started playing the ground is lava, tag, or a few other games that each generation plays but according to my child development class, all kids know them. They have been played in one way or another since the dawn of time. At around 3-4 most kids will learn these games without any adults having to teach them. The biggest reason Cap wouldn't know these games is he was a sickly child his whole life before the serum, he would have been kept inside so he wouldn't get more sick, kept away from other kids as much as possible. But they totally had The floor is Lava in the 1940's."
Thanks, ArreliaJores!

Chapter 3: Good Mornin', Sleepy Spidey

Notes:

Sorry for not updating in a while!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Peter Parker wakes up in a way that isn't normal for him.

It's... peaceful?

Dude. This is great.

He closes his eyes and stretches, muscles popping and sounding like they snap with all of the noise they're making, but it feels great.

He gets up and pads over to the bathroom, his day feeling like it's started off right.

It quickly turns terrifying when a face pops up less than a foot from his own with a phone in between them.

"The floor's lava!"

He lets out an undignified scream that he would later deny, saying that "it was a manly holler, if anything."

He flips and spins around, launching himself onto his bed, to the wall, and then he scuttles up it and to the ceiling.

Once he finally gets his bearings, he hears the laughter.

"Shuri?!?"

She gasps for air, zooming in on him on the ceiling with her phone.

"Are those Thor pajamas?" She wheezes, tears slipping from her eyes.

"Wha- No!"

Notes:

They totally were.

Have a blessed day!

Chapter 4: A Man's Lab Should Be A Safe Zone

Summary:

Before Lab Time can even start, Peter is interrupted by the princess of Wakanda.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

 

Peter Parker leans back in his swivel chair--he begged Tony for it after his last one, ah, broke due to an incident involving fire webbing--and sighs in relief.

Ah, relief.

School is done for the weekend, he can patrol tonight, and Mr. Stark's about to come in and they can get started on the new Iron Man upgrades.

Perfect.

He takes a sip of his coffee--whipped cream and sugar and milk dumped in--and yawns.

Man, I'm tired.

He turns his chair around and stretches, yawning again even though he just did, and then pulls out his phone.

Urgent text from Princess Leia, his phone reads.

Get ready, Spider-Boy

His phone suddenly switches to a video of Shuri screaming the Dreaded Words™, and Peter yelps and throws his phone and jumps up onto the chair, but he lands on the back, somehow keeping it balanced.

"Shuri!" He yells. "You'd do that to a guy in his lab?!? A man's lab should be a safe zone!"

"Smile, Parker!" He hears her say on the video. "The Dora Milaje is watching!"

Peter groans, covering his face with one hand to avoid being embarrassed further.

She's showing her twisted game to the group that protects the royal family?

"Whyyy?"

"Basic training. Keeping you on your toes."

He looks down at how he is on his toes to stay on the back of the chair, and raises an eyebrow.

"Why is this my life?"

"Say hi to the people that could kick your spider rear!"

"Hi," he says timidly, waving because he doesn't want to have Okoye--that one lady who is extra scary and carries a spear--take him down because he was disrespectful.

Unfortunately, when he waves, he loses his balance, but he lets himself fall so he can roll and flip to his feet on the other side of the desk, onto a small refrigerator (for snacks, obvi,) taking everything with him, which admittedly wasn't much, but still.

"I made it!" He declares, phone literally stuck to one hand, showing off his skills.

"What is going on?!?" A voice exclaims, and Peter looks up to see the Tony Stark, his mentor, his father figure, and student of Dank Memes 101, with his fresh coffee and an oh-so-done look on his face.

"Uhhh, the floor is lava?" Peter offers lamely, face blushed red.

Tony walks out.

Notes:

Thank you for reading! Sorry it took so long!
Have a blessed week!

Notes:

For the record, I don't know when the game was first played, but let's just assume that Bucky knew 'cause his sister was a doof. Yeah? And let's pretend that Cap forgot the game, or at least played a different variation of it, like the floor is water with sharks or something. Cool.
Have a blessed week!