Chapter Text
He didn’t even think. the energy was speeding towards her and Lance didn’t even think. He and Red acted as one, pushing the other lion out of the way. Taking the blow. Taking the pain. Taking his life.
He shot up in bed, a scream on his lips. The sweat on his back was sticky, the pain of the blow still fresh on his nerves. His hands tingled where the energy hit him first before it cascaded throughout his body, frying every cell.
It had been weeks since the day at the shield station. Weeks since he had died saving his friend. Weeks since that same friend brought him back from the over the edge. No one besides the two of them knew. It had never come up in all of the conversations with Keith, filling him in on what happened while he was away with Krolia. Pidge, Coran, and Hunk—his best friend dammit—didn’t know. He had died in that lion on that god forsaken shield station. He had died. Everyone had heard him scream. Heard the silence afterwards. He knew because they all looked concerned when they came back to the castle. They looked him over and checked his vitals. He didn’t need a healing pod, even with the weird lightning shaped scars on his forearms and hands. The princess, it seems, had healed those as well when she brought him back from the Nothing. They looked unsure when the scans came back, and he was mostly fine, some bedrest would be the extent of his recovery care.
No one asked. No one talked. No one cared.
Allura was so absorbed in Lotor and his ship that she ignored Lance completely. He hoped the mice hadn’t told her about the things he had said about her but knowing the relationship between the Altean mice and the princess, he knew it was pointless. She didn’t care. He took the rejection and the silence as he always did. Put on his smile and joked around, acted like nothing happened, that he was fine. The stress definitely wasn’t getting to him.
Then Keith was back. He was back and taller and broader than when he left, and no one said anything. He was back and had brought his mother, an Altean, and a teleporting space wolf with him. A TELEPORTING SPACE WOLF. Lance was still freaking out about it a little. Lotor was usurped, the Altean girl—Romelle—had told her story and Lotor had been ousted as the lying snake he was. Shiro’s betrayal was a shock to everyone’s system. Their leader attacking them, hurting them, and taking off with Lotor, had cut them all down to the core.
The fight to follow had been hard. Getting back in Red had been terrifying. The last moments of his life playing in his mind again and again as he tried to calm down, push the fear down so he could do what had to be done. They had sent Keith through the wormhole after Shiro. They had fought for their lives against the beast of a machine Lotor had constructed. Luckily there was no real reprieve from the action for Lance to think about what was happening because if there was, he would have lost any sanity he had left. The fear would have frozen him, probably would have killed him. Again. But Keith came back. He came back, and they beat Lotor and they saved Shiro and Keith had this new scar on his face, and they won. They lost the castle, but they won. None of the team had been lost, they had everyone. No one had died. Except him and Shiro, weeks ago.
They were heading home now. Jumping from planet to planet because they couldn’t wormhole anymore. Camping on the most hospitable ones. Saving as many people as they could along the way. Shiro had started staying awake longer and longer, resting was doing him good. Keith explained what Shiro had told him on the Astral plane. Lance was shocked. After the shock receded, the guilt and pain washed over him. Alone one night in the makeshift tent he shared with Hunk, the guilt swept him up and brought him to his knees. Shiro had tried to tell him, tried to talk to him and he hadn’t listened! He hadn’t heard clearly in those last seconds before they left the shared headspace! He could have helped Shiro, they could have avoided Haggar taking control of Shiro and stopped Keith from getting that massive scar on his face and going through having to fight his brother to save his own life. He could have stopped it all. But he didn’t. He had tried to talk to Shiro afterwards, to find out what was going on, but nothing came of it.
Shiro didn’t blame him. Keith didn’t blame him. But he blamed himself, the sharpshooter who could do nothing but shoot a blaster and run his mouth. The one who jumped in front of his teammate to save her, died in the process, and no one cared. Even his own sacrifice wasn’t enough. Enough to make him better than the useless seventh wheel. The screwup.
His breathing had begun to calm down when he heard the footsteps. They were moving fast, like they were jogging towards him. They must have heard him and been worried. Lance laid his arms on his bent knees and put his forehead on his folded arms. Whoever it was, was going to check on him no matter what now so he might as well make it as painless as possible.
He didn’t expect it to be Shiro.
Shiro pushed aside the flap of his makeshift tent. They really needed better shelters, these scrounged up tents were barely standing.
“Lance are you alright? You screamed, what happened?” He asked hurriedly. He was out of breath; he shouldn’t have been out of bed.
“It’s nothing Shiro, just a nightmare. It’s really nothing to worry about, they happen to all of us at least sometimes now.” Lance said reassuringly. Shiro had enough to deal with along with his own nightmares.
“Nightmares aren’t nothing Lance. We’re in the middle of an intergalactic war, there’s going to be some terrible things that happen, those leave scars. It’s good to talk about the things that happen, it helps you process them.” Shiro was calm in his explanation, ever the leader.
Tired of being disregarded by the rest of the team, and with the old Shiro back, Lance considered telling him about all the stuff that happened. Shiro would listen, wouldn’t he? Lance was tired of doing this alone and being alone with his awful thoughts. He opened his mouth to try and tell Shiro at least something when another voice carried into the tent.
“Shiro you shouldn’t be out of bed!” Keith exclaimed hurrying into the tent with a worried expression on his face.
“Keith, I’m not overexerting myself calm down. Besides I’m not the only one who needs the rest.” He looked pointedly at Lance, the bags under his eyes must have been more noticeable than he thought. He turned his head away quickly; Keith didn’t need to see them too.
“Lance didn’t die and get brought back to life Shiro, but you’re right we should all be sleeping it’s been a rough few weeks.” Keith sighed, not noticing how Lance whipped his head back to look at him shocked.
“Keith you don’t know what Lance has been through, don’t make assumptions.” Lance was surprised by Shiro’s stern tone, there was no way Shiro could know. He wasn’t around for the shield station incident, the clone was and Allura hadn’t told anyone else, he knew that for sure.
“What are you talking about Shiro? If something that bad had happened to Lance, he would have been in the healing pod when I got back, or someone would have at least told me, Hunk for sure. That’s not something to be kept a secret, it could hurt the team, and everyone involved mentally, and we need everyone in as good of form as possible.” Keith looked confused; Lance couldn’t have been hurt that badly. Hunk at least would have been all over the red paladin if he so much as had a scratch on him from a fight, he was a good friend and cared for everyone’s well being.
“Hunk was preoccupied.” Lance said quietly, looking at the floor. “He was trying to get the plates back in alignment, he didn’t see it.”
“See what? Lance what are you talking about? Are you saying something happened?” Keith asked, starting to worry even more.
Lance sighed heavily, well he was going to tell Shiro anyways and Keith could be trusted. Besides Keith seemed genuinely worried about him right now.
“We went to a shield station over a planet with a Galra settlement, it was attacked by some of Lotor’s enemies. They knocked the plates out of alignment, we only had maybe a varga to put it back together before the next radiation belt hit. Allura and I were putting a broken plate back together while Hunk fixed the alignment and Pidge and the other Shiro got the power back on.” Lance paused, he looked up at the other two paladins in the room. Shiro looked sad but not surprised, Keith on the other hand had horror dawning on his face. His eyes were blown wide and he was practically oozing concern.
“Something went wrong, there was a power surge and the plate we had been fixing discharged. It looked like lightning. It went straight for Allura and Blue.” He got quieter as he talked, the memories making him shake. “I didn’t even think. I pushed her out of the way and took the hit. I didn’t make it out.” Tears had come to his eyes. He gripped his knees tighter.
“What do you mean you didn’t make it out? You’re sitting right here in front of me, you look totally fine.” Keith had started to feel the panic rise in his chest, who could hide this from him? From the team? If Hunk had known, Lance wouldn’t have ever been left alone.
“I mean, I died Keith. The discharge stopped my heart. It shut down my lion and ended my life,” Lance lifted his arms into the light to show the two men the lightning like scars, “Allura got out of Blue and came to see if I was alright, she found me like that. Not breathing, no pulse. She healed me with her Altean magic, brought me back to life, kind of like with Shiro.” Lance couldn’t look Keith in the eye, but he did look at Shiro with a small rueful smile. “When we got back to the castle Coran checked me out but the only thing wrong with me were the scars on my arms. No other damage, the others probably assumed I’d been knocked out or knocked offline by the energy. Allura knows though, you can ask her if you don’t believe me.”
Keith looked shell shocked; he had fallen to his knees at some point while Lance was talking. Shiro looked sad, a little angry that no one else had known. He was going to have some serious words with the princess later, this was unacceptable.
“Why didn’t she tell me? Why didn’t she tell anyone? Jesus Lance, youv’e been dealing with this alone this whole time?” Lance nodded “Allura didn’t try to talk to you at all?” He watched the red paladin shake his head.
“She was too preoccupied with Lotor and the ship, their project. I was still processing being able to breathe again. I thought she would have told at least Coran, but no one mentioned it and the healing pod said I was fine, so it was dropped.” Lance shrugged sadly and wrapped his arms around himself. Shiro was still adapting to all the sensations of having a physical body again and didn’t like touch so he looked at Keith and gestured to Lance, trying to get Keith to give him the physical comfort he knew Lance needed.
Keith got the hint and moved over to where Lance was. He got the younger pilot’s attention and opened his arms, an invitation to take if he wanted. Lance looked shocked before his face scrunched up and he collapsed into Keith’s arms. The sobs started when Keith wrapped his arms around Lance and curled around him.
“You’re alright now Lance, you’re not alone. You’re safe here. For what it’s worth, I’m so glad you’re alive. I don’t know what we’d do without you.” Keith whispered into Lance’s hair, trying to rub soothing circles into the shorter boy’s back. He wasn’t very good at this whole comfort thing, but Lance needed it right now and Shiro couldn’t help.
The older Black paladin had turned away from the two, lost in thought as to how to deal with this situation from here. They needed Allura in the Blue lion right now because he couldn’t fly Black. Once he was back and healthy though there would need to be some shuffling done. You couldn’t be apart of the team if you weren’t going to work with the team and Allura had shown how much she cared about the team and Lance with this. There had to be some punishment in order, actions like these had consequences and she needed to face what she’d done.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Keith stayed with Lance that night, holding the younger man as he cried and long after the tears had stopped and they’d both fallen asleep. Waking up in Keith’s arms wasn’t as awkward as Lance thought it would have been, probably because of the exhaustion of crying himself to sleep but also because Keith had mellowed out in his time away and made Lance feel safer. If there was one thing Lance needed right now it was to feel safe.
When Keith woke it was to Lance’s face nuzzled into his neck and breathing softly but very much awake. He smiled to himself, glad that Lance had calmed down and that he had helped in some way.
Keith gave the other paladin a little squeeze to let him know he was awake, “How are you feeling Lance? You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, doing better. Still exhausted though.” He said, muffled by Keith’s shoulder. “Thanks Keith. For being here. For staying. I really needed it.”
“Of course, we’re a team Lance. Even with all our fighting and sniping at each other we’re still a team and I’m your friend. I’ll be here whenever you need me.” He paused “And I’m sorry for snapping at you when I got back to the castle, I was in a rush and you were just trying to be cautious. I could have been anyone in disguise especially with the height difference. You’ve been through a lot while I’ve been gone, things I have no idea about. I’ll try to remember that from now on.”
“We’re not the same people as when you left Keith, you especially. We’ll figure it out, but thanks for understanding. No one has really been taking me seriously lately.” Lance whispered, moving back a bit, making Keith loosen his hold. They looked into each other’s eyes for a beat, then Keith smiled.
“We should probably get up, scrounge up some breakfast, and definitely find Shiro. He’s probably planning something, and I don’t want it to be a surprise.” They moved reluctantly away from the warm cocoon of safety they had made and got up off the pile of blankets they were using for beds in their camp.
The two paladins walked out of Lance’s tent and towards the campfire the group had set up in the middle of all the tents. They rotated who shared with who every time they landed to keep space even and to keep possible fights to a minimum. This time it was Lance’s turn to have a tent to himself, something Keith didn’t think should be repeated. He had heard some of Shiro and Lance’s conversation before he had entered the tent and didn’t like the idea of the red paladin suffering from those nightmares alone, especially now that he knew what had happened to the now shorter boy. There was a reason he stuck so close to Shiro, for his own comfort of knowing Shiro was alright and because Shiro was still badly shaken from all that had happened. He needed support and so did Lance, and as the temporary leader of the team and a friend to both, he wanted to be there for them.
They found a spot big enough for the two of them to sit side-by-side on a rock near the fire. Hunk was already up and making something in a pan with Coran’s help. Pidge hadn’t arrived yet and was probably still sleeping. Matt was tinkering with something across the fire from them with Shiro nearby (looking tired but at least looking like he’d slept). Krolia, he knew was patrolling the perimeter of the camp and had probably been up for hours. Romelle was sitting with Allura a spot or two away from Matt and Shiro. When Keith looked at Allura he frowned, something had to be done about her behaviour, what she had done to Lance was not okay and would not be tolerated. Lance looked up at him when he caught Keith frowning and followed his gaze. Realizing that Keith was looking at Allura, he tensed. Lance didn’t want a confrontation right now.
Keith felt Lance go rigid and looked over to him. Seeing Lance looking wary at where Keith had been watching brought Keith out of his thoughts. “Lance don’t worry. I won’t do anything to start a fight right now. I want to talk to Shiro first, handle this quietly. You don’t need anymore stress and neither does he, it’ll be okay.” He spoke quietly, trying to get Lance to relax again. Riling him up wouldn’t help his mental state at all. Lance looked at Keith and nodded, a small smile on his lips. Keith really had mellowed out.
“Don’t you two seem cozy this morning! What brought this on?” Hunk teased when he noticed the two paladins sitting rather close together on a rock near him.
“We had a bonding moment.” Keith said with a smirk.
“He cradled me in his arms.” Lance added dryly.
They looked at each other, making eye contact and burst out laughing. They held onto each other as they laughed, trying not to fall over.
“At least I remember this one!” Lance exclaimed, laughing even harder when Keith snorted.
The rest of the group was looking at them oddly but smiling, the two of them getting along was well overdue. With the spectacle over, Coran and Hunk started passing the food around which brought Pidge out of her tent (read; cave) she had shared with Krolia. The team ate in relative silence, enjoying the calm of the morning. Krolia rejoined the group just as everyone had finished their breakfast, to eat her portion which Hunk had set out for her for when she returned from her perimeter check. With breakfast done and the group all together, Shiro thought it a good time to bring attention to the issues he had identified.
“So, it has come to my attention that some events happened with the team that Keith, Krolia, and I don’t necessarily know about. Keith and Krolia because they were off on their mission and me because I was on the astral plane while the other me was with the team. I was hoping we could spend some time today going over those events so the three of us could catch up on what’s been going on.” Shiro looked at Keith, hoping to get his agreement “I know our battle and loss of the castle ship was a couple weeks ago but better late than, never, right?” The other members of the team all nodded; Keith looked at Lance to check on the other paladin. He seemed to be on board, so Keith nodded at Shiro.
“Well, who would like to go first?” Shiro asks, looking hopefully at the other paladins, Coran, and Matt.
“Well we teamed up with Lotor which you guys already know, we helped him ascend the throne with that Kral Zera thing. We found my dad and sent him back to Earth with the blueprints for the castle ship, killed Zarkon in the process. Hunk, Lance, and I reprogrammed a sentry to have fun which was cool. We met Lotor’s nanny, she taught Hunk some stuff about Galra culture that helped us out at the shield station we saved.” Pidge listed, lost in thought as she went over what happened the last couple months.
“What kind of culture stuff?” Keith questioned.
“The meaning of Vrepit Sa actually. It was kind of cool. Got the Galra on the shield station to work together again to help us instead of fighting each other. It would have sucked to deal with a mutiny as well as two paladins down.” Hunk shrugged; it was a cool anecdote but not as exciting as it once had been.
“What do you mean two paladins down?” Keith asked a little too quickly, making Lance flinch and Shiro look at him pointedly.
“Well the other Shiro was flipping out, that’s why it took Pidge so long to get the power in the station back on because he was essentially out of commission. And when the power cut there was a huge surge that knocked Lance out and shut his lion down. We checked them both out when we got back to the castle and both were fine according to the scanners. You wouldn’t guess it with how Lance screamed though, it sounded like he was dying.” Hunk looked a little haunted at the memory. His best friend in so much pain and not being able to reach him must have been hard on the guy.
Lance flinched hard at Hunk’s mention of him screaming. He curled in on himself a bit and scooted a bit closer to Keith. No one but Shiro and Keith saw this though as the other paladins were cringing at the memory.
“How do you know he was knocked out? Did someone go to check on him?” Shiro asked, concerned at where this was going.
“I did.” Allura said “I was concerned for Lance, so I left my lion after the surge had been cleared. I found him unconscious in his chair with no outward damage and tried to wake him up. He didn’t respond right away but when he woke up, he seemed fine. A bit dazed but fine.” Allure spoke quickly with concern, as if she hadn’t gone over to find their teammate dead and brought him back instead of finding him unconscious.
Keith couldn’t believe it. There was no way Lance had lied to him and Shiro, not after what happened to their leader. Lance could be annoying, but he would never lie about being so badly hurt. Keith looked at Allura in shock before turning to Shiro, who was barely hiding his anger behind a shocked face. Keith grabbed Lance’s knee gently to comfort the red paladin who had started to shake. He’d let Shiro handle this one, Keith would look after Lance until they got this straightened out.
“Lance was knocked unconscious by a surge of electricity and no one told us?” It was Krolia who spoke, seeing her son so close to the red paladin right then made her think something wasn’t quite adding up here. For Keith to be so physically close to someone there had to be a good reason and to try and comfort that someone physically was another thing altogether, that paladin must have suffered worse than just being knocked out by that surge to warrant Keith being so protective. “A surge like that could have done some serious damage mentally and physically, that’s something the pilot of the Black lion should know. It could effect the whole team.”
Keith stared at his mother, she must have known there was something not quite right for her to be pointing that out, she probably noticed how Lance had curled into him once the incident was mentioned.
“We checked him out with the scanners in the medical bay, they said he was totally fine. Nothing amiss.” Coran interjected cheerfully; he had done the scan himself after all.
Lance had begun shaking even harder now. How could she lie to everyone like that? He wasn’t knocked unconscious, he knew it. If it weren’t for Keith being so close and gripping his knee, he’d be in full panic mode right then. He was getting close as it was. He wanted to leave the fire, go back to his tent. He didn’t want to hear Allura lie about what happened to him, what she’d done afterwards. He wanted to get up and run away to somewhere quiet and safe. Why didn’t she want them to know? Why was she hiding it? Why couldn’t he say something to correct her? Did it really matter? He was alive, so why would changing the story matter? It would just make everyone worry, just like Shiro and Keith did last night. He didn’t want to make anyone worry. If they were worried about him, they weren’t focused, and everybody needed to be focused in case something happened. He needed to get under control, he needed to go somewhere quiet and focus he needed to—
“Lance, calm down it’s okay. You’re safe. It’s okay.” Lance’s spiraling thoughts halted as Keith whispered reassurances in his ear. Quietly so no one would notice or hear them, so it wouldn’t draw attention to them. Lance looked up into Keith’s eyes, looking gently back at him.
Keith was trying not to let his concern for Lance make him cause a scene as his mother argued with Coran that a surge strong enough to knock out the pilot and shut down the Red lion would have left at least some nerve damage and there is no way Lance would have been able to go without a healing pod unless there was some outside influence on his body.
“Someone had to have helped the healing process for there not to be any lasting effects from the discharge. At the very least he’d have contact burns on his hands from where the energy entered his body!” Krolia was getting mad now, there was something seriously wrong here and she could tell Keith knew about it. He couldn’t say anything though; the red paladin was taking most of his attention. What had happened to shake the usually cheery boy so badly?
“Why don’t you ask Lance? He’s sitting right there; he could probably give you answers about the burns and stuff.” Matt pointed to the boy who had calmed down a fair bit with Keith whispering in his ear. Lance looked up quickly with wide eyes at the mention of his name.
“What?” Lance said, looking around for what he’d missed while not paying attention.
“Seriously Lance, we’re talking about you and you space out? What could you possibly be thinking about instead of explaining what happened like Shiro asked?” Pidge said critically. “What is up with you? You’ve been really quiet this whole time.” Pidge narrowed her eyes at Lance, noticing just how close together he and Keith were at that moment.
Before Pidge could comment further Shiro piped up from his spot next to Matt, “Pidge, lay off. None of us have been sleeping that well and this was probably pretty traumatic for him to go through, remembering it can’t be easy.” The stern tone in his voice made Pidge pout but back off.
“Getting knocked unconscious isn’t nearly as traumatic as essentially being brought back from the dead though Shiro. I think you’ve got the ‘worst trauma’ ribbon.” Matt said with a considering look on his face, like he was pondering the nature of everyone’s experience with traumatic events in the last few months.
“This isn’t a trauma contest Matt, we’re just trying to figure out what happened, not compare someone else’s experience with Shiro’s even if it was worse.” Allura said placatingly from her rock next to Romelle.
That was the last straw for Lance. He stood up angrily and walked stiffly back to his tent. Keith was hot on his heels, knowing that Lance was in for a major breakdown.
When the two paladins had left, with wide-eyed stares from everyone other than Krolia and Shiro, all eyes turned to Allura.
“What the fuck Allura?” Pidge exclaimed. “You say it’s not a trauma contest and then make a dig at Lance? What did he do to deserve that? If I remember right, he took that hit because he pushed you out of the way!” She was getting mad now, Lance was an idiot, but he didn’t deserve to have his pain brushed aside. He had tried to help her when she needed it and tried to save Allura from getting hurt because that was who he was. He stuck his neck out for people, helped as much as he could, he didn’t deserve this ungratefulness.
“He could have died.” Hunk said quietly, “He could have died on that shield station trying to save your neck and you go and say that? I don’t know why Lance had a crush on you for so long, you definitely don’t deserve him.” Hunk stared accusingly at the princess who just looked confused.
“Hunk has a point Allura, Lance could have died taking that hit for you. By all accounts he should have died. Usually you’d be worried about something like that, why aren’t you now?” Shiro asked, raising one of his white eyebrows at the princess.
The princess was squirming. Trying not to meet anyone’s eyes. Everyone was quiet for a moment, waiting. Hunk broke the silence.
“The mice told you what Lance told them, didn’t they? Because Pidge and I were busy, he told me afterwards that he had talked to the mice, that he had told them exactly what he thought of you, how he felt. Did you ever talk to him about it?” Hunk asked accusingly.
“I didn’t think it was necessary, I was busy with Lotor and Lance knew that. I have no time for romance especially with a fellow paladin. We need to stay focused and relationships are the last thing we need.”
“Then what about you and Lotor? From what I heard; you were pretty cozy with him.” Keith snapped as he walked back to the group. The rage was clear on his face, a surprise he wasn’t screaming at Allura.
Keith had caught up to Lance quickly, he didn’t bother asking if the other paladin was okay, he walked with him to Lance’s tent and held the other boy as he shook and cried. Keith tried to keep Lance from hyperventilating until the physical and emotional exhaustion kicked in and Lance passed out in his arms again. Keith had laid Lance down and carefully put a blanket on him before he got up again and walked quickly back to the group at the fire in time to hear Allura talking about staying focused and relationships.
“And while you’re coming clean, how about you tell us why you’re lying to everyone? Why you’re lying about healing Lance? Cause that’s why he has those burns on his arms, you healed them and now they’ve scarred over! That’s why he never had to go into the healing pod, not that that would have helped him anyway with the condition he was in when you got to him!” Keith was trying very hard not to scream at Allura, he knew that if he really let himself get angry his yelling would wake Lance up and Keith couldn’t let that happen.
Shiro had moved in Keith’s direction in case he needed to hold the younger paladin back, Krolia had moved closer to her son as well. The anger rolling off Keith had Krolia ready for a fight.
“Lance was unconscious Keith; a healing pod would have done the job no problem.” Coran said, getting confused with what the black paladin was implying.
“Do you want to tell them? Or should I?” Keith spat out glaring at Allura.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The princess said hotly.
“He was dead. He was dead in his lion. The discharge was so strong it not only stopped Red, it stopped Lance’s heart too.” Keith was shaking. He couldn’t understand why Allura had not only kept quiet about it but had lied to their faces and Lance’s about what happened. He couldn’t fathom what drove Allura to do this.
“He was dead, and you brought him back like you did Shiro. You brought him back and healed the damage. You saved him, after he saved you. There’s nothing wrong with that, so why would you lie? Why would you leave him to deal with that burden alone? You lied to everyone including Lance.” Keith took a calming breath, he didn’t need to be so riled up right now, it wouldn’t give him answers.
“Why did you lie Allura?” Shiro asked, giving Keith some time to cool down before he started in on the princess again.
“I didn’t want to worry everyone. He was alright, there wasn’t any permanent physical damage. There wasn’t a reason to tell everyone. We had a mission to complete and we couldn’t afford another distraction.” Allura said matter-of-factly.
“Distraction! The well-being of one of our teammates is not a distraction Allura!” Shiro snapped. Everyone went quiet. Shiro didn’t snap, the real Shiro didn’t snap at anyone. Matt stepped up next to Shiro and grabbed his arm lightly. A sign of solidarity and a grounding point. Shiro was beyond rage, so was Keith but Keith had grown significantly in his two years away and even though he wanted to, so badly, he didn’t let it take over.
“What if it had been someone else who was hit? What if it had been Pidge or me? Would that have changed your decision?” Hunk asked quietly, hoping that she’d say no, hoping she wouldn’t think so lowly of Lance as to care less about him than the rest of the team. Everyone turned to look at Allura, awaiting her answer.
“Well we need to make sure both your brains are at peak health, you’re our engineers after all so of course I would have tried to make sure you were alright. Lance seemed fine afterwards, I didn’t feel the need to check up on him.”
Keith saw red.
Krolia held him back as he tried to launch himself at the princess.
Hunk gaped at Allura. Disbelief at what she had just said in his eyes.
A quiet voice from beside Allura drew everyone’s attention, “You sound like Lotor.”
Gasps rang out. Shock on the faces of all except Keith, Shiro, and Krolia. Romelle glared at the princess she had heard of as a child. The daughter of King Alfor, the first pilot of the Red Lion and creator of Voltron. She was disappointed in this girl sitting next to her, treating a friend and comrade with so little regard. Treating another life with so little regard, just like Lotor had done to her family.
A muffled cry broke the silence. Keith froze and tried to take off in the direction of Lance’s tent. stopped for only a second before his mother let go and he dashed away from the group. Hunk watched him go with sad eyes, knowing he couldn’t help Lance at that very moment and hating himself for failing him again.
“Lance is alive, he is physically well, I don’t understand what the problem is. We need him to form Voltron and he is here; His mental state does not affect that as much as it would if it were Pidge or Hunk. I do not see what I have done wrong.” She said very confused as to why her team had suddenly turned against her.
“Lance has been quiet for weeks, I thought it was just the aftermath of that last fight and the loss of the castle. He’s never good with change like that, but thinking about it, he was quiet before then too. He was more somber, less cheery. Sad even. Like he wanted to talk about it but couldn’t. He couldn’t talk to us because we didn’t know, because we didn’t bother to check up on him after the shield station. He thought we didn’t care. Oh my god he thought we didn’t care that he had literally died!” Hunk was getting hysterical now. His best friend had died. HE HAD DIED! He’d been left to believe that no one cared. The person whose life he saved and who had saved his in return had let him believe that. Hadn’t tried to make it right. Had gone right back to working with Lotor on that damn ship and ignoring him. Oh god Hunk and Pidge had teased him about being down about Allura after that. They thought it was because she was spending so much time with Lotor, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t.
“Allura, as leader of the paladins of Voltron, I cannot let this go unpunished. You may have saved Lance’s life and for that we are grateful, but you deliberately ignored his well-being, isolated him, and damaged the entire team by doing so. You hurt him badly. Your actions have placed one of our teammates in jeopardy as well as the entire team. For this you do not deserve to pilot the Blue lion.” Shiro gave Allura a grave look, “Unfortunately as I am still not fit to pilot any lion, you have to. But until the time where I am fit to pilot again and you can be relieved of your post, you will be supervised and monitored by another member of the team. You will not be allowed to be alone with Lance until the time we have decided you are not a danger to him. No objections will be tolerated, you’ve all seen how Lance has reacted, how he is fairing in all this, does anyone disagree with this decision?” Shiro looked around expectantly at the rest of the group. No one said anything.
“Lance won’t like that. Why don’t we wait for everyone to be here before we decide my fate so severely?” Allura asked, eyebrow raised in challenge.
“A unanimous decision would be a good idea, Hunk can you get Keith and Lance please? They should be in Lance’s tent.” At Shiro’s request, Hunk got up immediately and rushed to the aforementioned tent.
“Don’t look so happy princess, Lance is loyal but not to the people who hurt him.” Pidge remarked; the princess’s self-assured manner was beginning to really make her mad.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Keith made it back to Lance’s tent his heart broke. Lance was lying where Keith had left him, but he was thrashing and whimpering in the throws of another nightmare. Keith rushed to Lance’s side and began trying to wake him up.
“Lance! Lance you’re okay. Lance wake up.” He soothed, grabbing the other’s shoulder lightly so as not to pin him down. “Lance, it’s me Keith, you’re okay! You need to wake up Lance.” The thrashing had slowed as Keith talked to him, but the whimpers didn’t stop until Keith moved his other hand to Lance’s cheek. “Lance, wake up. It’s a nightmare, you’re alright. I’ve got you Lance, you’re okay.” He whispered as the whimpering stopped and Lance calmed down.
Lance’s eyelids began to flutter, as he came out of his nightmare and closer to the waking world.
“Keith?” he mumbled, becoming more awake.
“I’m right here Lance, I’ve got you. You’re okay.” Keith kept whispering as he stroked his thumb on Lance’s cheek, trying to keep Red’s pilot calm.
“What happened?” Lance asked tiredly, sitting up and leaning towards Keith.
“You passed out on me after talking with everyone after breakfast, you had another nightmare, so I woke you up.” Keith was still speaking in a low, soothing tone, trying to make sure Lance didn’t get too overwhelmed just after waking up. He had had a very rough morning, stressing him out anymore was not something Keith wanted to do.
“You’ve somehow gotten really good at this comforting thing Mullet. I’m really glad you’re here.” Lance said his voice raspy from all the crying and yelling he’d done.
Keith smiled fondly at the younger paladin, wrapping his arms around him, and pulling Lance closer. This was a good change to their relationship. “Yeah, my mom and I spent a lot of time just the two of us in the Quantum Abyss, we both have scars and nightmares, so I learned pretty quick how to comfort someone after a nightmare. And how good physical contact can be for calming someone down. I’m glad I’m helping.” Lance nuzzled himself closer to Keith, to bask in the safety of having Keith so close.
They stayed like that for a while, just feeling each other close and taking comfort in knowing they were safe. It was weird for them, going from heated rivals to begrudging friends and then finding themselves wrapped around each other. Maybe this is what people meant by the closeness of brothers in arms.
Or maybe it was something else.
Lance was starting to drift off again when Hunk came rushing into the tent.
“Shiro needs you guys to come back to the fire pit, he’s made a decision and he’d like your opinions.” He fidgeted in the entryway; Lance looked awful. The bags under his eyes were a deep purple and his eyes were red and puffy from the tears.
It was kind of awkward for Hunk to stand there and wait for the other two to untangle themselves from each other and follow him back to the fire in the middle of their camp. He didn’t know what was up between the two paladins, but their dynamic had definitely shifted, since yesterday even. The trio arrived at the campfire quickly to find an awkwardly quiet group glaring daggers at each other. Most of the glares were directed at Allura. Lance gulped as he and Keith arrived, and eyes turned to him. Great they know what happened. He’d bet 500 gac that’s what this was all about.
“Lance how are you feeling?” Shiro asked calmly, like he wasn’t about to make a huge decision.
“Better Shiro, thanks.” Lance replied slowly, still uncomfortable with the situation and the stares he was getting from his friends. Keith was standing close by which helped keep Lance from freaking out.
“Good, I’m sorry to drag you into this Lance but I need your input on the situation, Keith’s too. I’d like the decision to be unanimously supported if possible.”
“Okay, what’s the decision?” Lance raised an eyebrow in confusion. Why would Shiro want his input on anything? Nobody else did.
“We’re deciding the terms of Allura’s punishment. She lied to the team and put you and the rest of us in danger, that cannot be left unpunished. What I have come up with so far is that currently she is not allowed to be left alone with you, she must have supervision at all times. Once I am able to pilot Black again, she will no longer be allowed to pilot Blue until she has proven to the team that she can be trusted on the frontline with the team. Her actions caused you major mental and emotional pain; it cannot be easily forgiven.” Shiro explained, a hard look in his eyes.
The terms of the sentence were fair in Keith’s mind, she treated Lance like dirt, so she couldn’t be trusted around him. Keith was more than okay with that. He probably shouldn’t be on guard duty for her for a while though, it could end badly.
“Everyone else has provided their input, it’s just you two who haven’t had a say. What do you think guys?” Shiro looked at Lance with concern, this would affect him a great deal after all.
“I agree with these terms.” Keith said quickly, he wanted this over with so Lance could hopefully start to recover.
“Lance? What about you?” Everyone had turned to look at the red paladin, waiting for an answer. Expecting an answer.
What was he supposed to say? Serves you right Allura for making me feel like crap? She had caused him a lot of pain, made him feel like less than dirt. She did need to be punished for her actions, but was this the right way of doing it? She had put the team in jeopardy in a way, and if you can’t be a team player you shouldn’t be on the team. He couldn’t handle being alone with her right now, he was far too upset with her and wouldn’t be stable enough after everything to not do something stupid. The twenty-four-hour guard seemed a little much but then again, she could do something in revenge, she hadn’t proven to be violent like that before, but the team couldn’t risk it now either. They had no castle ship anymore so having one person out of commission besides Shiro would be disastrous. There really wasn’t much to think about after that. Lance looked over at Allura, she looked like she was fighting back tears. He felt his heart clench a bit at seeing her look so sad and hurt but what else could he do? She’d done something awful and she couldn’t just get away with it.
Lance stood up a little straighter and looked Shiro in the eye as he said, “I also agree with the terms.”
Shiro gave him a soft smile before he turned to address everyone, “It has been decided unanimously. Allura, you are no longer permitted to be alone with Lance, you will be supervised at all times and once I am fit to Pilot the Black lion once more you will no longer be permitted to pilot the Blue lion. Do you understand these terms?” Allura nodded solemnly. “Good your punishment begins now. Krolia if you would be so kind as to take the first shift to supervise her?” Krolia gave a small smile and nodded. Keith breathed a sigh of relief; his mother would keep Allura away from Lance for sure. Krolia led Allura away from the group still around the fire.
Keith turned to Lance to see how he was fairing, he looked tired but not upset like earlier which Keith thought was an excellent thing.
Lance turned to look at the others in the group, “If it’s alright with everybody I’d like to go nap now. I’m exhausted and I really would rather not talk about what happened right this minute.” With a look to Hunk, Lance continued, “I’ll be okay to hangout and explain later but right now I just need to chill and wrap my head around it all okay?”
Shiro nodded, “Take as much time as you need Lance, we’re not going to force you into anything. Go rest, I’m going to do the same, today has been an adventure.” He turned toward the tent he was sharing with Matt and Keith to lie down for a while.
Lance turned back to Keith when the black paladin cleared his throat “Did you want me to come with you Lance? It’s okay if you don’t but the option is there if you want to take it.” Keith said quietly so mostly just Lance could hear. It was easier to sleep when Keith was around, fewer nightmares so far, so Lance nodded and began walking back to his tent with Keith following behind him.
The remaining five people around the fire looked at each other and Pidge piped up “So what do we do now? It’s not even lunch time yet,” and the rest just shrugged and started going about their day as close to normal as possible when you’d just had a massive bomb of information dropped on you.
Hunk decided to give it a few hours before he tried to talk to Lance about everything, his best friend needed the rest and it would give Hunk more time to process exactly what had just gone down. Pidge started brainstorming ideas for how to better keep track of the paladins’ mental states especially with the castle and most of healing pods gone. Hopefully something like this can be avoided in the future by taking better care of each other.