honeybummer
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“I love Tavitha,” Gale went on. “More than anything. And I know she loves me.” A pause. “But I also know… she doesn’t sound the way she did with you.”
Astarion blinked. Then, a smirk, crooked and knowing. “Ah. I see.”
“You pleased her. In ways I haven’t. And I want to learn. I’m a scholar,” Gale said. “I’ve spent my life in pursuit of knowledge. Why should this be any different?”
“You want me to teach you how to fuck your girlfriend,” Astarion said flatly.
“To please her,” Gale corrected. “To understand her. If that means watching you two… then yes. Teach me.”
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Wyll’s lantern swung closer. Tav could see the gleam of his boots through the underbrush. He was only steps away.
“Do you think he’d be angry, pet?” Astarion mused. “If he found you like this? Would he be heartbroken? Or simply humiliated?”
Of course he wouldn't let her answer. He covered her mouth with one hand, the other pressing her down.
She clenched her jaw, wanting not to tremble beneath him. She should’ve been ashamed. But gods, it was hard to think when Astarion was like this—when he made her feel so alive.
His mouth grazed the back of her shoulder, then up her neck. “Should I bite your scruff while I fuck you in front of your boyfriend? Like a wild beast?”
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Astarion thinks seducing her will save him. Only, he isn’t as untouchable as he pretends, and she isn’t as innocent as he thinks—she has secrets sharp enough to cut them both open.Series
- Part 2 of Litanies of Ruin
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Astarion cannot stop staring at his pregnant wife, desire flaring.
Ivy finds a ring of chastity, hoping to sate his desires, afraid she won't be enough to satisfy him.
The ring only lasts for so long. -
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Josie leaves the noisy city of Baldur’s Gate to enjoy the countryside. The sleepy town of Hollow Mors is charming in a fog-covered, mildly haunted kind of way. She takes up a job as a live-in assistant at a castle.
Her new employer—Lord Ancunín—is handsome, wealthy, and dramatically nocturnal. He spends his nights mysteriously alone, and Josie can swear she sees droplets of blood on the marble floors some mornings, and, quite often, she hears the fluttering of small wings in the middle of the night.
But her room is spacious, her clothes all couture, and the pay is suspiciously generous.So what if her boss might be a vampire?
It's a job to die for.A gothic modern AU featuring Josie (an unbothered assistant) and Astarion (a vampire who's very bad at being scary).
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Tav teaches Astarion (or attempts to) how to swim, since he hasn't swum in 200 years.
This Tav is the same Tav from another fic I wrote - No Saints Here.
This is a prequel, if you will. It is a moment that happened before my Tav ever decided to date Wyll.
Like all my work, this was meant to be fun and simple, and then it turned out to be more depressing than I anticipated.
Enjoy!Series
- Part 1 of Litanies of Ruin
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How much time had passed since she fled from Baldur's Gate? How long was she held captive by the mind flayers? Now, they were about to embark on a journey back to a city she never expected to return to, accompanied by a man whose mission was to reunite her with her family. Hopefully, her botched engagement announcement to Cazador Szarr meant he had moved on.
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Esther (half-elf, wild magic sorceress) ran away from home to escape high societal expectations and her family's schemes to use her for more political gain, only to be kidnapped by mind flayers later on. The Nautiloid crash reunites Astarion and Esther. The story takes place over the course of the game with flashbacks and time skips, eventually getting to a post-game timeline. Creative liberties will be taken that do not always align with specific events and characters.
Bookmarked by honeybummer
11 May 2025
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To the world, Hermione Granger is dead.
To the Order, she is their strongest weapon.
To herself, she is a shell of the girl she once knew.
To Grand Inquisitor Draco Malfoy, she is Rose Turner—his children’s new governess.
When Astoria Malfoy dies, an opportunity arises for the Order to get close to Voldemort’s inner circle. Using her expertly honed skills as a Master Legilimens, Hermione infiltrates Malfoy Manor as a governess and works to locate the last remaining Horcruxes, no matter the cost.
A Voldemort wins AU inspired by Jane Eyre and The Sound of Music
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Bookmarked by honeybummer
04 Jan 2025