Archive of Our Own ^beta

When Hinata was nine years old, his parents divorced.

There was no abuse that caused it. It was the fact that his mother cheated on his father with another man.

His mother had gone out one night, and hadn't come back home, telling her husband that she was working a late night shift

The next morning, she called his father while he was watching tv, and his dad was cleaning. Hinata heard his dad's phone ringing, and when his dad picked it up, he was silent. He could faintly hear his mother's voice on the other end, and see his father's excited smile disappear and be replaced with anger. He threw his phone on the floor.

Hinata didn't ask any questions, he simply told his dad that he was going to check up on Natsu.

Hinata knew not to ask any questions. He didn't want to see that pained expression on his dad's face ever again.

-

  Atourneys, court dates, stressed parents, ask no questions.

-

With the divorce and custody situated, Hinata and Natsu stayed with their father during the day, and mother at night, due to work schedules.

Hinata's dad would pick up him and Natsu to take them to school, and drop them off at their mom's house once she got home from work.

Hinata's mother and Teijo, the man she cheated on her husband with, lived together. Hinata didn't like him. Not just because he was the reason why his family was broken, but Hinata just did not have a good feeling about that man.

-

During the course of 2 years, Hinata's mother had moved into 3 different houses. All near Hinata's dad, of course.

But she just couldn't afford the other houses. 

Cigarettes and alcohol were the reason why. 

After the divorce, Teijo got his mother into routinely drinking and smoking. Whenever they smoked, Hinata made sure Natsu stayed away from them. He didn't want her to smell what couldn't potentially kill those two adults.

-

While all of this was going on,  Hinata got into volleyball. It kept him distracted from what went on at his mother's house.

His father bought him anything he needed for the sport: shoes, knee pads, drinks, a volleyball.

He was supportive of Hinata finding something he enjoys. He didn't want his son to have to feel like he needs to grow up just yet.

Middleschoolers don't need this much going on in their lives.

-

A couple months later, Hinata met "The King".

It was at his first and last volleyball match of middleschool. Even though he lost, his dad still congratulated him and told him he was proud that he made a team and fought hard.

He promised the blue eyes setter that he'd get stronger.

-

Slowly, Hinata's mother couldn't pay the bills anymore. She lost her job and Teijo wasn't much help.

He tried to get jobs, but his attitude made them last for a week or less.

His mother smoked more than she ate.

-

Two months later, the house had no more electricity or running water. It was dark and cold.

Hinata's dad tried to keep the children with him as much as he could, but Hinata's mother would complain about how he was trying to steal her babies away.

Natsu had no idea what was going on through out this whole situation. She was only four.

Hinata knew him and Natsu couldn't live there properly. So he told his dad to stop taking them over there.

-

From: mom

(11/5/14 | 7:03 pm)

subject: none

'Hello, sweetie! I miss you so much, my love. I wish you were here, but I know why you left. I'm sorry. I'm going to get the electricity and water back soon! Be a good boy, I love you.'

-

He never texts back because he will get his hopes up. He'll expect her to text back, and call. He'll expect her to give up drugs. To pick herself up. He'll expect too much, only to be let down.

-

She ends up homeless. Teijo ended up in jail for identity theft, and left his mom to fend for herself on the streets. Hinata wanted to help, but he couldn't. 

She was already into drugs, and his father knew if they gave her money to try and help her, she'd use it on drugs because her body would tell her do it, do it, do it.

Hinata beats himself up. He left his mom when she needed him the most. He shouldve been there for her. He should've. What kind of son was he?

-

Hinata finally goes to high school.

Karasuno High school 

-

From: unknown

(8/4/16 | 6:52am)

Subject: none

'hi baby. it's momma. I'm borrowing someone's phone right now, but I know the new school year is starting, and I just want to tell you to have a good day today. im sorry. love you.'

-

She remembers his phone number

-

Hinata joins the boy's volleyball club, and "The King", he quickly learns to be Kageyama Tobio, surprisingly attends Karasuno.  

Months pass and Hinata gets along with his team. Well, most of the time. 

Kageyama does yell at him and the two bicker quite often. 

But despite all of that, they were friends. Whenever Hinata would happily talk about his father and Natsu, Kageyama would never ask about his mother, which he was grateful for.

And then there's Tsukishima.

Most of the time, his insults were light hearted and held no true malice. But today was not going Hinata's way at all. 

-

He kept missing spikes and screwed up every receive. He was frustrated. When Hinata gets frustrated, he cries out his anger. But he couldn't right now. He was in the gym.

Tsukishima spoke up when he saw Hinata's shoulders tremble, "What's wrong, Shrimp? Are the King's tosses too much for you now?"

Hinata stopped walking.

No one said anything.

Hinata was heading towards the bench, so his back was facing the team. No one would see his face, or the tears threatening to spill out of his red eyes.

'Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe o-'

"Are you seriously going to cry right now?"

The entire gym was silent.

'Breathe in,breathe out,breathe in, breathe out'

"If you're going to cry, atleast cry to your mom, you baby." Tsukishima sat out.

'Breatheinbreatheoutbreatheinbreatheout'

"Tsukishima.." A different voice spoke out. Hinata guessed it was Asahi.

 'BREATHEBREATHEBREATHEBREATHE'

"Hey, Hinata.." Kageyama spoke softly and placed a hand on Hinata's shoulder.

Kageyama turned Hinata to face him and was met with his friend looking at him with tears pouring out of his eyes.

Hinata quickly realized the entire team could see him, so he shook himself out of Kageyama's hold and ran out of the gym.

-

"I love you so much, my dear! You're the best son in the while wide world!" His mom laughed out as she squeezed him in a warm hug.

-

"Shouyou?"

"Yes, momma?"

"Sometimes parents need their kids to be there for them when they're going through a rough time. Promise me you'll always be here, Shouyou."

"I promise, momma!"

-

During Hinata's 7th month of his freshman year, he and his father found out she died earlier that month of starvation.

-

It's all his fault,

His fault, his fault, his fault.

-

"What the hell was that, asshole?" Kageyama yelled as he clenched his fists, strongly resisting the urge to punch Tsukishima.

Tsukishima didn't say anything. He honestly didn't expect any of that to happen. He was having a bad day too, and decided to take it out on Hinata. But that didn't excuse his behavior at all.

"I-" Tsukishima shut his mouth, not knowing what he was going to say.

"Kageyama, please go find him." Daichi pleaded.

With no hesitation, Kageyama agreed, and ran out.

-

Hinata stopped running after he passed Ukai's shop.

He walked down the warmly lit road until he was met with a park.

He walked through the slightly wet grass, made his way toward the blue and yellow swing set, and decided to sit down.

It was nice out.

The sky was littered with stars, and the wind had the leaves on the trees make music.

Breathe in, breathe out.

"I'm okay. I'm okay." Hinata muttered to himself.

-

Kageyama ran.

He ran and his legs felt like they were burning.

He ran, and was about to run past a park until he saw Hinata sitting on a swing, head tilted up, looking up at the stars.

Kageyama decided against shouting out the others name, and walked up to the swing set, and took a seat on the empty one next to Hinata.

"Hey, I'm sorry about what happened back there." Kageyama said cautiously.

Hinata inhaled, "It's not your fault."

"You-you dont have to tell me anything if you don't want to, but I'm here. I'm not going to leave you."

Hinata replied with a hum, not trusting his voice as tears fell down once more.

"Thank you. I'm sorry. I am being a baby." Hinata huffed as he tried to wipe away his tears.

Kageyama stood up, which caused Hinata to finally look at him with puffy, bloodshot eyes.

Hinata didn't expect Kageyama to bend down and wrap him in a hug. This was different from the ones he got from his mom.

"You're not being a baby. Everyone has things going on in their personal lives. You don't need to pretend to be happy,"

This hug was completely different.

"Like I said before, I don't expect you to tell me what's wrong yet, but I do want you to hopefully be comfortable enough to eventually talk about it. I'm not going to leave you."

Hinata couldn't speak. 

He opened his mouth to say something, but it came out as a choked sob.

Kageyama brought him closer into his chest.

Warm.

"I'll be here. Please remember that. I don't hang out with you just because of volleyball. It may have been how we met and bonded, but even being with you outside of it is just as enjoyable,"

Hinata has a team now. He has a friend who isn't pressuring him into talking.

"You have me. You have the team. We're here for you." Kageyama finished and placed his chin on top of Hinata's head.

He has someone.

Hinata was still crying. He held onto Kageyama's shirt tightly, as if the world would suck him up if he let go.

Kageyama brought a hand up to run his fingers through Hinata's hair. Letting him continue crying.

"Its okay. I've got you." He whispered.

"Thank you. Thank you, Kageyama."

-

Things were better. They weren't perfect, but they were better. 

Tsukishima apologized and Hinata eventually talked to Kageyama about his mom, and he listened. After Hinata finished talking, he told him it wasn't his fault. That if anything, it was Teijo's fault and that the world is just cruel.

The following month, Hinata and Kageyama got closer. They laughed together, cried together, ate together, argued, hugged, and eventually confessed to eachother.

-

Later that year, they made it to nationals. 

He did find a way to fly. His volleyball team helped him find that way. They helped him when he fell down, and pushed him back up. Even higher.

-

"Momma! Momma! Let's go to the swings! Push me!"

"Okay, angel. Hold your horses, I'm coming!"

"Momma, when I grow up, I wanna fly!"

"I'm sure you'll find a way, Shouyou! I believe in you!"

-

"I did it, momma. I found a way to fly."