Chapter Text
I never knew my father, I was told by my mother that he had ‘gone away for a little bit’ and that ‘he would be back soon’. But I’ve never met him once in my life, and I don’t intend on finding him. It was obvious the older I got that he was never coming back, and that he was in fact a deadbeat asshole who took off as soon as he realised I was coming into the picture.
As for my mother, she decidedly took her life when I was just 8 years old. Imagine that, an elementary school kid coming home to find his mother hanging from her bedroom ceiling, lifeless and unmoving. It still haunts me to this fucking day, and for that I’ll never forgive her.
She left me alone and scared.
I couldn’t even stop her, I’ll never know if I could have talked her out of it if I had just been a few minutes earlier, or if I had noticed the signs. To think, 8-year-old me blamed myself for her suicide, how fucked up is that.
But that thought alone, that I couldn’t save her, however much I may have tried, is what pushes me forward in such a situation as the one I’m in now.
I may have seen Eren slip over the edge of our school building, but I won’t give up hope.
I can’t.
I sprint forward as he falls and use a one last ditch attempt to reach out and grab his falling hands. The palm of my hand connects with the soft skin of his wrist and relief floods through my system, I’ve got him.
But as soon as I’m relieved, the little brat decides to be a fucking moron and try to wriggle out of my grasp.
‘’What the fuck are you doing?! I’m saving your fucking life you little brat!’’ I shout, to which he glares at me with the most determined look in his shining bright eyes.
‘’Does it look like I want to be fucking saved!? Let go you dwarf!’’
Oh he didn’t just fucking say that, I’m going to save his ass just so that I can kill him myself if he carries on.
With one large yank I pull him back onto the roof, much to his dislike and protest. I keep a firm grip on his wrist because I’m not thick, as soon as I let go he’ll go running again, and we can’t have that, I haven’t beaten the shit out of him yet.
He struggles against my tight grip and almost gets away, but I decidedly pin him down in a more strategic way, by straddling his hips and pushing his hands beside both sides of his head.
Now, to anyone who would walk in at this very moment, it would look like we were two teenagers who had gotten a little carried away, but obviously it is anything but that. I’d never even think about getting into this sort of position with the kid underneath me, even if he does have undoubtedly beautiful eyes… and smooth tanned skin.. and—
‘’Ahem..’’
I’m swiftly broken out of my thoughts by a loud interruption from the boy himself, who is still underneath me, and looks extremely pissed off about that fact. Who the fuck does he think he is looking at me like that? I just saved the kids shitty life!
‘’Can you stop staring at me all creepy like and move the hell off of me? You’re surprisingly heavy for such a small guy and I never imagined myself dying via suffocation’’ He smirks up at me, surprisingly sassy after such a trauma of dangling off of a fucking roof, knowing he’s caught me off guard and angered me further all the same.
‘’You know what kid, fuck you. I just saved your damn life, so no, I won’t get off of you. If I get up you’ll leg it and I have many a fucking question to ask you before you move a single fucking muscle.’’ I snap back, he gives me an incredulous look in response. But not a moment later there’s a strong sense of defiance hiding behind his glimmering eyes, and before I know it I’m flipped ass over tit and our positions have been switched entirely. ’’What the fu—‘’
Eren moves ever so close to my face, and just as he’s inches away he smirks at my confusion, ‘’I’m sorry, what was that? I’m not moving a single muscl—‘’ but before he can finish I take advantage of his vulnerable confidence and begin to wrestle him for dominance.
A squeak of surprise from Eren only spurs me on to regain the hold I had on him in the beginning, but he also seems to have other ideas.
Our wrestling goes on for what seems like hours, but what began as a fight for control has soon morphed into that of playfulness. There’s no longer the rough edge of pinning limbs and primal strength, only that of two people who could be easily mistaken for childhood friends.
We roll around on the roof top trying to catch each other and pin one another down, seeing who can do it first to win. In the end, I manage to take hold of his firm biceps and pin him to the floor. We’re both lost for strength and determination, so Eren lies on the ground, beaten fair and square.
‘’Well, that was definitely invigorating’’
I ignore his comment, seeing no need for small talk. ‘’Don’t try and use big words, you’ll hurt yourself’’ I tease, ‘’let’s get straight to the point, I’m done with fucking around. What the hell are you doing up here, on the edge of the roof no less’’
Eren goes stiff underneath me, sudden realisation flooding through him that I’m not fucking around, and that I actually want to know why the hell he’s here. ‘’Well, I-I… I don’t want to talk about it. It’s none of your business anyways’’
This kid has got to be fucking kidding me. Is he serious right now?
He cant be bloody serious.
‘’Look, kid. I just saved you from a god knows how long drop to your inevitable death. I think I deserve an explanation for why I almost choked on my cigarette smoke and felt my stomach in my ass’’
I don’t know what he expects, but he isn’t going anywhere until he gives me a half decent explanation, that’s for sure.
We sit in silence for a considerable amount of time before Eren seems to give up and cave in. He relaxes against my grip and gives a long-suffering sigh.
Here we go, fucking finally.
‘’I had an argument at home’’
… that’s it?
‘’Well, that’s not it but the specifics don’t matter and you wouldn’t understand’’
I must have spoken aloud.
Or Eren’s a psychic.
I don’t think the second one is too likely, so let’s go with the former.
‘’Well that’s a lot less dramatic than I was expecting’’ I mumble, releasing his arms from my vice like grip so that he can sit up, ‘’I would have thought you were involved in a drug deal gone wrong or some shit if your fucking behaviour is anything to go by’’
He snorts, I take it it’s because I amuse him.
“I’m glad I make you laugh kid” I mumble, while slowly, but surely, moving myself from his lap onto the concrete next to him. “So, wanna… uh, talk about it maybe?”
Why am I so crap at this?
Get your shit together, Levi.
Jesus.
“No, not really.”
“Well what do you want to do?”
He sits there with a thoughtful look encompassing his face, his eyebrows are knitted together and his lips are slightly turned down.
He’s kinda cute, in a lost puppy sort of way.
After a few minutes, his face seems to soften considerably, but the edge of concentration is still there. He straightens up and finally looks my way, “all I know, is that I don’t want to go home. I don’t ever want to go home”
I frown, this kid can’t be serious. I’m not exactly straight laced or a model child but even I wouldn’t go as far as running away from home because of a measly argument. I decide to divert from the topic of home for now though, “well you can’t stay out here all night, you’ll get cold and that’ll make you ill and that’s just disgusting. I can’t sit next to you in class with you spreading germs everywhere. That’s damn unsanitary.”
Again he snickers, I must be a comedian.
“I’ll find somewhere, I have other times. I won’t get ill, and if for any reason I do, I’ll just skip school for a few days. It’s no big deal.” Other times? This kid’s done this before?
I can’t just leave him out here, if I do I won’t stop thinking about it all night and it’ll ruin my already crap sleeping pattern. I could invite him to my place? What the fuck am I thinking, I hardly know the kid! But I did just save him from certain death… but I only met him earlier today! He could be a secret serial killer for all I know.
Suddenly, Eren gets to his feet beside me. He brushes off the dirt that must have collated on his jeans in the short space of time that he’s been up here and turns to me, “well I better get going” He trails off as he looks out at the city that’s slowly darkening as the night progresses.
“Stay at mine tonight” I blurt out, my brain not too sure who’s in charge here.
Eren quickly whips around and almost stumbles from the abrupt request, looking very bewildered and uncertain in how to reply.
“I mean, just for tonight. You don’t have to, but it’s better than sleeping on a bench and I have a half decent couch you could crash on” I casually add, while trying to keep completely calm and not laugh at his open-mouthed surprise.
‘’Uh… you really don’t have to. I wouldn’t want to be a burden-‘’
‘’Stop right there’’ I interrupt ‘’I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mind, but if you’d rather risk sleeping on a rusty old bench where anyone could take you while you’re sleeping, then be my guest.’’
Eren stands there with a dumfounded look on his face, I don’t get what’s so hard to understand? Just say yes or no, it’s not that fucking hard.
Maybe this kid is thicker than I thought.
‘’If I say yes… then will you promise not to bring this whole night up ever again? No more questions?’’ He mumbles, looking dejected and defeated.
I smirk, ‘’what night? I have no idea what you’re talking about’’.
-/-
Getting off of the roof and finding our way back to my apartment wasn’t as hard as I was expecting it to be. Eren was quiet the entire time, and never once did he try and change his mind about coming to stay at mine for the night. For all he knew I could be an axe murderer that was luring him to his death, but he didn’t really seem bothered by that fact at all.
I really don’t understand this kid.
Once we reach the main lobby of my apartment building Eren decides to slow his pace considerably. I turn to look at him, slightly annoyed that he’s slowed down our pace unnecessarily.
‘’What’s wrong?’’ I question, staring blankly at the phone that lays in his hand. He seems to be writing out a reply, to whom I have no idea, and his face has turned from the plain impassiveness that was there before to a sour frown that has knitted his brow together.
Looking up he shrugs, pocketing his phone as if nothing had happened and moves straight past me to get into the free elevator that has just opened behind me.
I follow him warily, eyeing him from the side as I press the button to my floor. ‘’Who was it?’’
He mumbles something incoherent and seems reluctant to carry on any further conversation, so I leave him alone. I’m never one to complain about being in complete and utter silence, I find it therapeutic.
The elevator pings as it notifies us of our arrival to my floor, and its doors swiftly slide open to reveal the hideous generic carpet that the apartment block has chosen for all of its hallways. And yes, they’ve used it for every single hallway in this complex, I checked. I wasn’t going to be on the only floor with this carpeting and not kick up holy fuck about it. But as it turns out, I’m suffering alongside everyone else who lives here.
Hooray for unity.
After shuffling down the hallway, we finally make it to my front door, and before we even go in I tell Eren to remove his shoes immediately upon entering, and give him no room to argue about it.
My apartment is definitely nothing special, but I like to make the most of what I have. I keep it clean and I keep it tidy, for my own pleasure of course. I couldn’t give a single crap what anyone else thought about how I keep my place, as long as it’s up to my standards, then everything is fine.
As we walk in a begin a mini tour of the apartment, ‘’So, obviously this is the living room and where you’ll be staying for the night’’ I start with, gesturing to the couch for Eren’s benefit of course. ‘’just through there is the bathroom, and then right next door is my room. So, if you get up to piss in the night, make sure you make the least amount of noise possible. I don’t want to be woken up’’
Eren briefly looks around, taking his time to take in his new surroundings.
‘’It’s so clean’’
Oh, for Christ’s sake.
‘’If that’s all you have to say then I’m going to bed, there are extra pillows and blankets in the closet over there’’ I point out lazily towards the door on the other side of the room, ‘’Try not to make too much noise’’.
I slink out of the living room and leave Eren to his own devices, after hearing a cheerful ‘thankyou’ and ‘goodnight!’ from him, I’m satisfied that he’s capable to managing himself. It doesn’t take me long to change into a loose pair of joggers and a t-shirt before I’m lying in bed and scrolling through my phone. I think about the evenings occurrences, and how the fuck I managed to get myself involved with a kid I hardly even know.
I hear little else from Eren for the rest of the night, only a few bumps and grunts from him getting comfortable on my not so comfortable couch. I know, I told him it wasn’t too bad, but I couldn’t have the kid out sleeping in a park somewhere. I’d feel responsible if something happened to him when I could have done something…
When I could have done something…
Locking my phone, I place it on my bed side table, making sure to set an alarm for slightly earlier in the morning than usual.
I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a long day.