Chapter Text
The spring rains had come early this year, alternating between gentle tapping on the metal roof and near violent waves of vibrations as it whipped against the dwelling in sheets. Despite the climate control module, the dwelling still seemed to grow damp and hold the chill this time of year. The chill and cold she despised, but the rain she loved. Even the storms, which during the changing seasons could sometimes be frightening, she couldn't help but find fascinating. She would stand under the overhang of the roof, watching the dark clouds swirl on the horizon, lightning dancing between them and the ground. Stand and watch as the violent clouds moved closer and the wind picked up, rattling the tall grasses that surrounded their tiny home. Stand and watch as the moisture saturated the air and the rain began to rattle against the roof. Until Kylo would come, rolling his eyes and insisting she come indoors.
After four years, Rey would have expected the novelty to have worn off. Just as she would have expected to have gotten used to the green of the summers and the cold of the winters. The moon’s seasons were distinct and a contrast to the never changing sands of Jakku.
She sat up in bed, her hand reaching to the empty spot next to her and finding it cold. Sighing, she got up, listening to the rain pattering on the roof as she slipped through the bedroom door, pausing for a minute to peer at the two small figures sleeping soundly in the other bedroom before heading got the dwelling’s main room.
“Ky?” She called, voice quiet, finding him sitting shadowed in a chair in the corner of the room. The glow from one of the consoles lit his brooding profile as he lifted his dark eyes to meet hers, the green light reflecting off his irises. He said nothing, just shifted back in his chair and moving his arms to make room for her. Without any more prompting, she walked over and sat on his lap, letting him pull her close to his chest, tucking her head under his chin.
“Did I wake you?” his chest rumbled under her ear as he spoke.
She shook her head, “The rain did, and I noticed you were gone. Did you have a nightmare?”
The nightmares were a regular enough occurrence that it had become something the both just dealt with and shrugged off. Or at least tried to… some nights were harder than others. She had her guilt riddled dreams, he had his terror filled ones. Remnants of a life they had run away from which refused to fully let them go.
Kylo didn't answer. She pulled her head back to look at him, reaching up to catch his chin as he tried to turn his gaze away. Even in the darkness she could recognize the fear in them. Her breath caught in her chest, “It was just a nightmare, right, Kylo?” He averted his eyes and it took all her willpower not to raise her voice, to keep her hushed tones and not wake up the kids sleeping in the next room. “Kylo.”
He shook his head, swallowing nervously, “It was him , he's looking again. After four years I'd hoped he had given me up for dead.”
She held herself still, forcing air into her lungs, “I… how much was he…” her voice trailed off. Just the fact that Snoke hadn’t given up on finding his wayward apprentice was terrifying. But the idea that he might have spied on some of their secrets…
“He felt me, nothing else. And that on its own is plenty bad enough.”
It was hard to disagree with that. She shivered and he pulled her close again, “What are we going to do?”
“We don't need to worry yet. He doesn't know where we are… nobody knows where we are.” He planted a kiss on top of her head.
It was true enough, they were on an uninhabited moon in uncharted wild space. At some point someone had been here, a small abandoned base was here, rich with scrap. They'd put her skills, acquired from her years scavenging the wrecks of Jakku, to use, collecting parts to either use in the homestead they had built or to save to trade during one of their twice a year runs to a port for any supplies they might need that they couldn’t scavenge, make, build, or grow at their home. There wasn’t much they needed, it still surprised her how self sufficient they’d become.
Still, just because no one knew where they were now didn’t mean it would always be that way.
“Maybe we should come up with a plan though… Skye and Sol, they’re old enough now that we should probably make sure they know where to run or where to hide if something happens.”
He tensed slightly before he sighed and let out the tension, “You just have to be the pragmatic one, don’t you?”
She pulled back again, studying his face. It had been nearly six years since they ran, and the absurdity of it hadn’t faded. Of all the people she could have fallen in love with, he had to have been the least likely. The enemy, a dark and cold murderer, a monster then and still now, if the circumstances go wrong. She didn’t fool herself that he wasn’t still capable of terrible things.
But for her, with her, he was different, there was a gentleness that somehow she had tapped into, a part of his soul that was only for her and the kids.
“It’s better to be prepared than to be caught by surprise,” she said simply, and he sighed again, pulling her close, her ear against his chest. The sound of his heart merging with the sound of the rain falling on the roof.
“You’re right,” he sighed. “You’re right.”
The first two years were the hardest.
Early on, the first six months or so, they were running, afraid to stay anywhere for more than a few days. Afraid that someone would notice, someone would get suspicious, and that word would spread to the wrong ears. To the First Order, who had not taken Kylo’s fleeing with their prisoner particularly well. To the Resistance, who wouldn’t believe her messages that she was not being held against her will… or maybe they did. Maybe they did and just viewed her running away with a man most of them would like to see executed as something unforgivable.
Several close calls proved their anxiety wasn’t unfounded. They had nearly been caught on Oriel and nearly been killed by a TIE fighter assault on Durn. Fear and stress had worn at them, but they made it through it, finding refuge in the bottom dredges of society along the Rim. Amid the smugglers and murderers and thieves who didn’t like to bring attention to themselves.
There was irony there, it wasn’t lost on either of them, though Kylo refused to admit it out loud.
But then their world, already fragile, shifted under their feet. She’d been sick for a few weeks, especially in the mornings, and finally she’d given in to Kylo’s insistence that she get to a medic. The place they found was sketchy, the Ranat claiming to be a doctor appeared competent, but it was clear that he was affiliated somehow with local slavers. That had nearly made her walk out, but Kylo had pushed back, because he was the best they had access to, and maybe whatever she had was nothing but he wasn’t about to take that risk.
The doctor had been irritating, constantly bypassing her to instead ask his questions about her to Kylo. And then she’d been infuriated when he’d pulled Kylo to a side room instead of talking to her about the diagnosis.
She had still been fuming when the crackle of a lightsaber had caused her to jump to her feet, rushing in to find the Ranat’s head rolling on the floor, Kylo standing above him, eyes wild. He had thumbed off his saber, grabbing her arm, insisting they needed to leave now, pulling her out of the building before she wrenched her arm from his grip, insisting he tell her what was going on and why he’d killed the doctor.
It was not the best way to find out she was pregnant.
Looking back now, she understood why he’d killed the doctor, even though she still disagreed with the necessity of it. Kylo had understood, long before she did, that any child of theirs would be at risk. That any child of theirs would need to be kept from Snoke’s knowledge. In his mind, a seedy doctor who was an active participant in the slave trade wasn’t much of a sacrifice in order to make sure things were kept secret. But she hadn’t understood then, and she’d been furious with him, to the point where she had thought about trying to leave him.
Though with all honesty she doubted he would have let her go. Especially not then. But he’d apologized, in a way anyway, it was clear he had no issue with what he had done. He’d gotten on his knees, his face pressed into her stomach, asking for forgiveness. And she’d given it to him.
Becoming parents had not been in either of their plans. They never found out for sure why her implant failed. One of the med droids she visited later had said it looked like it might have been damaged by an impact at some point. It didn’t really matter, for whatever reason, it didn’t work, the why wasn’t really important in the scheme of things. It was something that shouldn’t had happened, but it had, and it left them with a limited number of options that had come down to have it or terminate it. Kylo had given her space to make that decision, or at least tried to, but she could feel his resentment that she would even consider it. In the end, she just couldn’t bring herself to make that choice, even knowing it was probably not fair to have a child in the middle of the mess they found themselves in. Not fair to drag a child into a life of running and hiding in the gutters of the galaxy.
They kept on the move, finding clinics with med droids when they could for check ups on her health. That was the compromise, because she could wipe the droids short term memory storage and erase the evidence of their visits. There’d be no more killing of doctors, she’d go without medical care before she’d allow that to happen again.
She didn’t need a medic to tell her she was carrying twins. That was made clear when she first felt them, felt their spark of life and contact within the force, and knew there were two. Not long after she nearly lost them, after they were attacked on Acisea IV. Either the force of the explosion or the rubble and debris hitting her, she wasn’t sure which caused the trauma. She’d woken up stabilized in a clinic, med droid tutting over her and Kylo hovering at her side. It had left her practically an invalid for the rest of the pregnancy, staying on bed rest. Heaping the responsibility of keeping them safe on Kylo and leaving her completely frustrated and an emotional wreck.
It had been hard to get over that it was a Resistance attack that had done that to her, that they had decided she was too much of a risk to leave alive on the run with Kylo. Hard to forget the glimpse she had gotten as the smoke cleared of the face behind the grenade launcher, a face of someone she had once considered a friend.
The twins were born in hyperspace while they were mid jump across the Rim. Kylo had managed to serve as her very panicked, pale faced midwife when it became clear that the babies were coming whether either of them were ready for it. It had been a fairly easy labor, all things considered, Solan had come first, Skye about forty-five minutes after. They were healthy, and that seemed like the only thing she could have wanted or asked for as she held them.
They kept running for another year. A year of constant movement and fear and exhaustion, of teething and colic and one terrifyingly high fever while they were in the middle of nowhere. But after that year things seemed to calm down, for them at least. The war was raging worse than ever, keeping the Resistance and First Order preoccupied with each other, giving her and Kylo a respite, and time to find a place to hunker down for awhile.
And in time that place became a home.
The rains hadn’t let up, but the preparations for spring planting needed to be made. Kylo spent a few days up on the west ridge, cleaning up the fields after the rough winter and working on the equipment. She spent her days working around their home, fixing the electronics and some of the wear and tear from the cold months, trying to keep the kids busy and out of her hair so she could get some things done.
It was easier said than done. A pair of rambunctious five year olds and weeks of constant downpours that kept them trapped inside meant they were practically bouncing off the walls of the dwelling. When they weren’t rough housing like a pair of tooka kits or squabbling like loth cats fighting over territory, they were following her around and demanding her attention. She would get them started on a craft project and try to slip away, only to find them beside her five minutes later.
“Will Dad be home for dinner?”
She was wedged into wall, working on the circuitry of climate regulator. It had been beyond flakey lately and she thought the thermal monitor needed repair. Sighing, she shimmied out from the access panel, turning to find Solan’s golden brown eyes regarding her pleadingly. This was the crux of their neediness she supposed. They were used to having their daddy around, and with him gone practically from the time they got up till after they went to bed, they were missing him.
Before she could answer, Skye stepped forward to stand next to her brother. She found herself struck, as she often did, by the striking contrast between them. It wasn’t as intense now as it had been back before Sol’s hair had started to darken from the near blond into what was now a sandy brown--- likely it would darken further until it was more similar to her dark chestnut--- but it was still a clear contrast.
Sol stood half a head shorter than his sister, light brown hair and warm, golden brown eyes that were warmer and less intense than Kylo’s dark brown, stockier in his build than his twin, a fuller face more similar to hers than his father’s. In contrast Skye was more narrow, her growth having focused upward leaving her lanky and leggy. She had her father’s cheekbones and black hair, and though her eyes were hazel, they were shot through with more green than brown than hers, and they shined with a sharp intensity that was on par with her father’s gaze.
“Probably not today,” she said, gently, wincing inwardly at the way the corners of their mouths dipped down. “Maybe not tomorrow either, but Zhellday for sure. And once the rains break we’ll be going out with him to work until the fields are planted.”
Solan looked down blinking. He was the gentler of the two, but with a brashness that seemed to contrast against that. When he got angry though, it was like the onslaught of a firestorm. Skye, in contrast, was more aggressive, yet also more reserved, more turned inward. Prone to brood and simmer when she was upset. Her anger a slow smolder that lacked the impressive fireworks that came with her brother’s, but if it was left to linger it could slowly build into an inferno. The small frown on her face and the edge to her eyes warned of agitation, and once again she could only sigh, before spreading her arms and pulling the twins into a hug.
Maybe she could talk Kylo into going out later tomorrow and at least eat breakfast and spend an hour with the kids. It might be enough to take the edge of the growing anxiety she could feel in them.
“It’s not for very long,” she murmured, her right arm wrapped around Sol and her left around Skye, pulling them close and turning her head to kiss one on the cheek, then the other. “I know he misses you when he’s out as much as you miss him.”
She let them go, sighing once more, “I miss him when he’s gone too.”
Once again she tried to distract them so she could fix dinner, leaving them on the couch with flimsi and chalk colors to draw. Things remained peaceful for about five minutes before the sound of the two of them arguing broke the quiet. She had her hands full, and decided to just let them argue. At least no one was crying or screaming for her.
She was in the middle of chopping stickli root for the stew when a crashing noise indicated that might have been a bad idea. Hurrying out of the kitchen, she found the two of them standing next to the couch, staring at a shattered vase that had been on a shelf across the room.
“It just fell,” Skye said, looking beyond startled.
“I didn’t… I wasn’t near it! It wasn’t me!” Solan stuttered. She frowned, he was lying, at least somewhat.
Skye glanced at Solan with a furrowed brow, sensing the lie in her brother’s statement but not understanding how he could think himself guilty. The combination of their two reactions sent a jolt of anxiety through her. They were force sensitive, she’d known that since they were in the womb. It was expressed subtly--- they picked up on emotions, rarely they heard a stray thought. But neither of them had shown signs of being able to act outwardly with it yet.
Solan’s eyes widened as he picked up on her anxiety. Wiping her hands on a dish towel she had slung over her shoulder, she shook her head, keeping her voice calm, “It’s just a vase, honey. It’s not a big deal.” She walked over and knelt in front of him, “I’m sure whatever happened was an accident.”
“It just kind of… um… fell,” Skye said, frowning between her and Solan, clearly sensing there was something she was missing in the greater equation of what had just happened. The girl glanced over her shoulder where the vase was, over ten feet from the shelf it had been sitting on. “Sort of.”
“It’s not a big deal,” she said again, trying to force herself calm, to not worry them further with her own agitation and anxiety. Getting to her feet, she nodded, “I’ll clean it up but I need you guys to color quietly and let me finish dinner, okay?”
The two of them nodded. She kissed Sol on top of his head, then Skye, before grabbing a broom to sweep up the broken shards, worry refusing to leave her be.
By the time Kylo came in that night the twins were already in bed. She left the bedroom to find him in the kitchen, soaking wet and ravenously eating a cold bowl of stew.
“Please tell me you at least heated that up?”
He glanced over his shoulder, grinning at her, “It’s fine cold.”
She snorted, walking over and collapsing on a chair across from him, “I’m a shit cook, it’s barely serviceable hot. It’s utterly vile cold.”
His eyes seemed to dance as he looked at her. That bright intensity that could take her breath away, “My garbage picker is getting all picky in her old age.”
Giving him a wry look, she shook her head, the last few days he’d begun to break out of the quiet broodiness that he’d been stuck in since sensing Snoke. “Call me that again and you’re going to be wearing a bowl of that stew.”
He smirked, scraping the last bites from his bowl before dropping it on the table. Looking down at the puddle surrounding him that had dripped from his drenched clothes, “Sorry about the mess, I was starving.”
“I don’t care about the mess,” she shrugged, getting up and grabbing his bowl. “You should be bringing some lunch with if you’re going to be out all day.” Dropping the bowl in the sink, she let out a soft squeak as he appeared behind her without warning, his mouth kissing it’s way down her neck. Her eyes fluttered shut and she leaned back against him, not letting the fact that his wet clothes were soaking through hers bother her. Turning her head, she kissed him, soft and slow, before breaking away and crinkling her nose, “You smell like a wet bantha.”
Kylo laughed, smiling, “Do I? Hmmmm…” Leaning forward again, he nuzzled against her ear, “Are the kids asleep?”
She gasped as one of his hands snuck under her shirt, palming her breast, “For over an hour,” she murmured.
He pressed his smile against her neck before hoisting her in the air, throwing her over his shoulder as if she weighed nothing at all. She squawked, startled, and he brought a hand down lightly to spank her ass, “Shush or you’ll wake them.”
Kneeing him lightly in the chest she pivoted as best she could to look back at him, “What the hell are you doing?”
“Going to the ‘fresher,” he said, giving her a devious grin, “so you can clean me up.” Her tunic had rucked up slightly, and he turned his head to nuzzle against the exposed skin of her stomach as his large steps brought them across the room in a hurry, depositing her in front of him in the ‘fresher before turning and locking the door. The kids tended to sleep like rocks, but it was better safe than sorry.
Rolling her eyes, she leaned past him to turn on the shower. It was a water shower, one that had been a bit of a headache to rig, especially the temperature regulator for the water, but had turned out to be well worth the effort. As she straightened up she was already pulling her shirt over her head, “You are incorrigible.”
He grinned, peeling his wet clothes off as he ogled her bare chest, “Incorrigible?”
“Completely incorrigible,” she confirmed as she shimmied out of her pants and underwear in one quick motion.
“I kind of like the sound of that,” he flashed a sly grin before picking her up and stepping into the shower stall and under the stream of hot water. She wrapped her legs around his hips, reaching behind her to grab a bottle of shampoo, sudsing up his hair as he bowed his head down to suckle and nip at her breasts.
As he duck his head under the stream of water he pressed into her, and her head rolled back, her toes curling and heels digging into his back. There was nothing that matched the feeling of him inside of her. The way he filled her perfectly, setting her nerves on fire as he nuzzled her ear, alternately whispered sweet nothings with utterly filthy things that made her blush. He was hers, she was his, and in these moments he was perfect. Worth every sacrifice and every betrayal that had been required to bring them together.
Worth every damn one of them.
She leaned on the door to the kids’ room watching as Kylo knelt next to each bed, quietly tucking the blankets around each of the small, sleeping forms before kissing them each on the forehead softly. As he got to his feet, he caught sight of her, giving a small smile as he walked softly over. Stepping behind her, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close while gazing at the kids as they slept. She glanced up, and even in the dim light she could see the adoration in his eyes.
“Had to say goodnight,” he murmured, before releasing her from his embrace and leading the way into their bedroom.
“You’re a good daddy,” she said, closing the bedroom door behind her. He gave her a small, almost shy smile as he sat down on the edge of the bed. She sat down across from him, leaning over to squeeze his arm, looking at him intently, “You’re a good man, Kylo.”
His eyes flicked down, the smile faltering. It always did when she told him that, as if he just could never believe it. He believed he could be a good dad. He believed he could be a good--- lover, mate, husband in almost every way aside from the formality of a marriage ceremony--- whatever you wanted to call what he was to her. But call him a good man and the disbelief would come, unable to believe there was good at his core.
There was though, she could see it, even if he couldn’t.
She sighed, laying down in bed next to him, snuggling close and resting her head on his chest, “Kylo?”
“Hmmm?”
“When did you… present… with your force ability? Did you ever have accidental outbursts?”
His chin tucked down, puzzled by the question, “I… I was able to sense things for as long back as I remember, but outbursts… I started having slips around twelve, it’s part of why I was sent to Skywalker.” He nuzzled the top of her head, “Why?”
Tracing her fingers along the scars marring his chest, she recounted the incident with the vase from this afternoon. He listened and when she finished he was quiet for a moment, “You think Solan had a force outburst?”
“He somehow did it… he knew he had. But Skye was confused about what had happened.”
“Five is pretty young for that,” he shook his head, then tucked his chin down so he could kiss the top of her head. “I wouldn’t worry about it. It could have just been a freak thing.”
“What if it happens again?”
“Then we’ll start working with him, with both of them really at that point, to teach control.” He wrapped his arms tight around her. “It sounds like they were a little overly rambunctious.”
She smiled, “They were driving me nuts. I think they were upset with you being away all day. Maybe you could spend the morning here tomorrow?”
“Maybe. Or maybe I should take them with tomorrow. I’m going to be gathering parts from the base, so it’s not like they’d be in the rain all day. And it would give them some space between walls for them to bounce off of.” He squeezed her tighter, “And then you could get a break.”
“You’re going scavenging tomorrow?” she smirked, poking him in the chest. “Garbage picker.”
“I learned from the best, and most beautiful, garbage picker in the galaxy.”
Laughing, she tilted her head up to kiss him. “I love you, you giant pain in the ass.”
He kissed her again, “I know.”
Chapter 2
Summary:
Nearly half of them began to converge on the room where Dad was, raising their blasters. She started to push herself up to her knees, ready to scream a warning, but then the four of them closest to the door went flying backwards, their startled cries echoing across the room. Red light burst from the doorway and Dad appeared, his lightsaber was lit in his hand, his face contorted in rage.
She had never seen her daddy that angry.
Her heart leaped into her throat as several of the men began to fire, but Dad batted the bolts away with his lightsaber, a snarl on his face as he moved towards his attackers, raising his hand up to send another one flying, before looking sharply over towards the consoles they were on. As he did that, she saw someone across the room move into view, raising another weapon up.
Solan let out a shriek, pushing himself onto his knees, “Dad!”
Daddy’s eyes flashed towards them before starting to turn, but he wasn’t fast enough, something seemed to hit him in the neck, and she could hear the angry bellow he made as he staggered backwards.
She screamed, fury and fear mingling together as several of the men leaped onto Dad, dragging him to the ground.
Notes:
Okay, trigger warning that things get rough in this chapter, and two five year olds are caught in the midst of it.
This chapter is a bit of a roller coaster so strap in.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The rains had slowed to a drizzle, but they were still soaking wet by the time they made it to the abandoned base. Rey’d done her best to cover the kids in about seven different layers, but it didn’t make much difference when they spent the entire trip running through the soaking wet tall grasses and leaping into mud puddles, giggling like maniacs as they chased each other.
He just grinned. A little wet wasn’t going to kill them, and while it was chilly they were keeping themselves warm by moving pretty much nonstop. It was a joy to see them happy and playing and just being kids, burning the pent up energy from being trapped in the dwelling for so long.
If you had told him seven years ago he was capable of feeling this much love for anything, he would have scoffed. Would have said love weakened people, and he was immune to such emotions. Yet here he was, whatever ridiculous dreams of power he’d held left far behind when they ran, content to scrounge and scavenge and farm as long as he could live in peace with the three people he loved more than anything and everything.
Sol screeched and ran through a patch of brush, flushing out one of the native leporine species he’d come to think of as “moon rabbits.” They were leggy and large with absurdly long, floppy ears. The fauna was limited here, the moon rabbits, a tiny odocoileine that tended to be smaller than the rabbits, some birds, including one near flightless fowl with iridescent feathers that Rey had dubbed “pretty bloggins.” The only predator was a feline that was too small to be a danger to a human, not even one of the kids.
The seasons could be rough, winters especially, but overall this random little moon had turned out to be the perfect place to settle. And the last four years of scratching out their existence and building a home had been the happiest of possibly his whole life.
Skye splashed her way towards him and he didn’t hesitate to sweep her up into his arms and spun her around, grinning as she giggled. He could see himself in her, both in her features and in her personality. She was more reserved than Solan, who was boundlessly exuberant, at least until something frightened him. When faced with uncertainty Sol would take a step back where Skye would take a step forward to confront it with a fierce stubbornness. Solan wanted nothing more than to walk away from a fight, although if pushed his temper could flare and he’d quickly become a force to be reckoned with.
Neither one of them was a carbon copy of either him or Rey, no, instead they were like puzzles. There were pieces from him and pieces from Rey, pieces from his father and mother too if he was honest about it. Pieces from Rey’s parents, whoever the hell they had been, were probably there too.
And all those pieces came together and formed something completely unique. He could see similarities to himself in both of them, similarities to Rey in both of them, but the end result was something entirely unto itself. They were individuals, not clones.
He set Skye down and she hugged him before running ahead towards the entrance to the old base. The tech in there was half a century old, but still there was plenty that could be scavenged and reused. They'd made good use of the resources it provided over the years.
All he really needed today was some power converters that he could use to fix the planter, but while he was here he’d spend time gathering up additional salvage and parts they might need later. That would give the kids plenty of time to burn off some steam while he worked.
“The two were accompanied by a girl.”
Seven words which were the first pebble in the avalanche that had swept him away. At the time she was the unknown that had grabbed his attention. He knew about the droid. He knew about the traitor. But a girl? WHAT GIRL?
If there was one thing he didn’t like it was unknowns in the equation. His mind almost fixated on it, who was this girl who aided the droid and the traitor? This new problem to add to the growing list? It had piqued his curiosity, and not in an entirely good way. The wish to find out more, to fill in this unknown with an answer had been compulsive. So when the troopers reported seeing her with the droid on Takadona, he’d immediately went after them, went after her, really. The droid wasn’t interesting, the droid wasn’t a question. The girl, she was.
He tracked her easily, her force signature was fluctuating rapidly with her fear, making her stand out like a flare in the dark. That fear was evident when he first saw her, saw her before she saw him, and lit his saber to be ready. She was a frightened, lost little girl in well over her head, gripping a blaster with white knuckles as she scanned the trees for signs of an enemy. Fear alone would make her likely to strike first and ask questions later, and that was exactly what she had done, firing a barrage of bolts that he batted away as if they were nothing, before trying to flee. Not that there was anywhere for her to run. She stumbled backwards, firing her blaster in desperation, and he almost playfully blocked them with his saber, until he decided it was time for this little game to end.
Freezing her in place too nearly no effort at all, and he’d stalked towards her. Watching as she fought in vain against his hold, taking in her face and her eyes, beautiful, frightened, and very defiant eyes. Something about them seemed to draw him in, make him want to get close…
“The girl I’ve heard so much about,” he had said, the sardonic tone lost as the words passed through the vocoder of his mask. Her eyes had darted back and forth in confusion.
He had scanned her, taking the dirty white rags she wore, the deep tan of her skin, her youth, still very visible in the fullness of her face and the smoothness of that skin. Scrawny and underfed, but with a body of lithe muscle, the body of someone who spent their life scraping and fighting for every scrap she could get.
A scavenger? Just a scavenger?
It was still hard for him to believe that some girl just stumbled into all this.
Who are you? His mind repeated the question silently at her, who are you? But as he circled around her, he shook that question away, shook away the strange feeling of being drawn in by her. The feeling of wanting to be drawn closer. He turned his back to her for a moment to clear his mind.
He had a goal, a mission. That needed to be addressed first. Once he had the droid, had the map, perhaps he could push forward to sate his curiosity.
“The droid,” he finally spoke. Forcing himself to pay attention to his end goal, raising his saber menacingly into her line of sight, “Where is it?”
“Get down!”
He peered down at his sister from top of the old consoles, “Why?”
“Cause mom would kill you if she caught you,” Skye snapped. She was bossy, never minding her own business, and always trying to tell him what to do. He stuck his tongue out at her and her eyes narrowed at him.
“Mom isn’t here,” he answered, pulling himself to his knees, not minding the layer of dirt and dust that was rubbing off on his wet pants and hands. His poncho had been discarded at the base of the stack of old equipment. This part of the old base was underground, and the ceiling was stone that dripped water in places. From up here he could place his palm on the ceiling, feel the damp rock, cool to the touch. He marveled at it a bit, ignoring Skye and her eyes glaring at him intently.
“If you don’t come down I’m going to tell Dad!”
He leaned over the edge, scowling, “Tell him, I don’t care! He’ll laugh.”
“You’re going to get in trouble,” her brow furrowed and she glared up at him.
Not able to think of another good answer, he just stuck his tongue out at her again, enjoying the way her fists clenched together as a clear sign he was annoying her.
“Sol,” Skye did her best impression of their mother, putting her hands on her hips, “If you don’t get down right now I swea---”
A distant voice echoed from the long corridor that lead into the room they were currently in and they both froze, startled. Dad wasn’t down that way, he was further up in one of the side room.
He closed his eyes, feeling out that direction. It was quiet again, but he could feel them… several of these strangers, moving towards them.
“There’s more than one,” Skye whispered. “Who?” They had barely ever seen any person other than each other or Mom or Dad. Once Dad had taken them with when he went to trade… that was the last time he could remember seeing someone else.
Another noise, faint, echoed down the corridor, and he dropped down to his stomach, extending a hand down towards his sister. He didn’t need to speak, she understood, climbing up haphazardly. When she reached his hand she grabbed it, and he helped her the rest of the way up.
The two of them dropped flat onto their stomachs, trying to stay as quiet as possible, still holding hands as the people drew closer. He closed his eyes, heart jumping into his throat. Whatever this was about wasn’t good, he was sure of that.
Skye squeezed his hand and he was pretty sure she thought so too.
As wonderful as it was to finally be able to get things done around the dwelling, the quiet wore on her after a few hours. She missed the noise, missed the energy of the two little hellions as they ran about, and she missed Kylo. And she felt anxious that they were separated right now.
How had she spent years alone during the Jakku years when now a few hours made her feel completely isolated and empty?
Pulling herself out of the access panel, she shook her head, it was silly to feel like this. They’d all be home together tonight. They’d eat dinner together, then she and Kylo would put the kids to bed, and later when the kids were sleeping she and Kylo would quietly make love before falling asleep in each other's arms.
It was only a few hours in the grand scheme of things, so why did it make her so anxious?
Trying to distract herself, she threw herself into list of repairs that had been growing steadily longer and longer over the last few months. With her head and hands busy with electronics, she let the rest of the world fade for a while, working her way down her list in a steady and efficient pace.
She was so focused that it took awhile before the low humming noise outside registered. When it did her head shot up, eyes widening. Thrusters. That was the sound of a transport’s thrusters.
In a blur she rushed over to the drawer her lightsaber was kept in, snatching it before running out onto the porch. Her heart leaping into her throat at the sight of the Resistance transport and the semicircle of Resistance troops slowly approaching through the misty drizzle. Was it better that it was Resistance and not First Order? Or was it worse?
She stepped out into the open, saber held out to the side where it was visible, though not yet engaged. The lead officer was flanked on each side by three more, each gripping a blaster but keeping them tilted down. Stopping, she waited, and they stopped, keeping a safe distance away from her. The lead officer stepped forward, and she felt her heart leap into her throat again as she realized who it was.
It was a face she last caught a glimpse of while she was bleeding amid the rubble and debris of from the grenade blast that had been intended to kill her on Acisea IV. It was the last thing she had seen, as the smoke cleared just enough to catch sight of the person holding the grenade launcher--- the face of someone she had considered a friend.
Her free hand clenched into a fist while her right hand gripped her saber tighter.
“Hey Rey,” Jessika Pava said, voice soft as she took a step forward away from the rest of the squad, letting her blaster drop from her hands to hang by the shoulder strap, raising her hands up. “Let’s just take it easy, huh? Put the lightsaber away and we can talk.”
“Talk?” she scoffed. “You need six men with blasters for backup to talk?”
“Just being careful,” Pava pursed her lips, “Is he here?”
Her heart jumped again, fear gripping her entire being, but it wasn’t enough for her to miss that there was something… something off in that question, but she couldn’t tell what it was. A vibration of emotion that was quickly tamped down. Pava’s mind was blank, shielded from her. She was sure she could break through easily, but not without being noticed.
Thank the gods they weren’t here today. “No.”
“We know he’s on this moon,” Pava kept her voice calm. “Put the saber down and come with us, Rey. We don’t want to see you hurt.”
“Oh? Don’t you?”
“Of course not. We’re your friends, Rey.”
A bitter laugh left her throat, “Were you my friend on Acisea, Jess?”
Jess eyes flicked with apprehension. She guessed the Resistance hadn’t been aware that she knew who had been behind that attack. Surely they wouldn’t have sent Pava if they had known that she was aware who had pulled the trigger in that market. “Acisea… was an unfortunate decision.”
“You tried to kill me. You ,” she emphasized the word, making sure Pava knew she was talking about her personally. “You tried to kill me, I nearly---” she bit her tongue as she realized what she was about to say. I nearly lost my babies. There was a good chance the Resistance still had no idea that she’d been pregnant, and it seemed safest to keep it that way.
“I had orders,” Pava said, voice flat. “It was a confusing time. You , Rey. You’re the one that betrayed us . You were running with the enemy. It was a risk command felt was too great to allow.”
“Leave,” she gritted her teeth. Igniting her saber. The rain hissed against the blue blade.
“We can’t do that.”
“We’re not hurting anyone. I never betrayed anyone. We didn’t want to be a part of it anymore!” she blinked, tears and rain mixing on her cheeks. “Just leave us alone.”
Nearly all emotion left Pava’s face, “Rey of Jakku, you’re under arrest for aiding and abetting a known war criminal.”
A flash of rage surged through her and she lifted her saber up, “The kriff I---” Her eyes widened and her words cut off as instinct screamed at her to move, and she dodged to the left. But it wasn’t quite fast enough, and she felt something impact the side of her shoulder. Staggering, she fumbled at the dart sticking out of her arm, knocking it to the ground as she felt the world spinning and her connection with the force growing fuzzy.
In a blur she felt them on her, and she was pinned to the ground.
There were a maybe a dozen stranger, dressed strange, stepping cautiously as they entered the room. Her eyes widened, realizing each of them was holding a blaster. Mom and Dad had two kept locked in the dwelling. They’d been warned they were never to touch them, or either of the lightsabers.
One waved their hand oddly in a series of motions, the group broke apart, spreading out to cover the wide room. Their eyes seemed to be scanning, looking for something. She squeezed Solan’s hand and ducked her head down as one approached the bank of consoles, starting to pass by before halting suddenly and taking a step back, head tilting down to look at Solan’s wet poncho that was laying in a heap by the base of the consoles. He crouched, picking it up, and his brow furrowed in slight confusion.
His eyes scanned the area as he got back to his feet, before frowning at the garment once more before dropping it and moving on.
Nearly half of them began to converge on the room where Dad was, raising their blasters. She started to push herself up to her knees, ready to scream a warning, but then the four of them closest to the door went flying backwards, their startled cries echoing across the room. Red light burst from the doorway and Dad appeared, his lightsaber was lit in his hand, his face contorted in rage.
She had never seen her daddy that angry.
Her heart leaped into her throat as several of the men began to fire, but Dad batted the bolts away with his lightsaber, a snarl on his face as he moved towards his attackers, raising his hand up to send another one flying, before looking sharply over towards the consoles they were on. As he did that, she saw someone across the room move into view, raising another weapon up.
Solan let out a shriek, pushing himself onto his knees, “Dad!”
Daddy’s eyes flashed towards them before starting to turn, but he wasn’t fast enough, something seemed to hit him in the neck, and she could hear the angry bellow he made as he staggered backwards.
She screamed, fury and fear mingling together as several of the men leaped onto Dad, dragging him to the ground. One of the others stepped back, looking directly at her and Sol, voice loud and incredulous as it echoed through the base, “There’s kriffing kids here.”
Several heads turned and looked at them. Grabbing Sol’s shoulder, she pushed him towards the edge of the console. They had to run, had to get Mom. He began to climb down, leaping once he was close enough to do so, she followed.
“Hey! Stop!” Several of the strangers rushed at them, and grabbing her brother’s hand she took off running towards the corridor that would lead to the surface and the exit.
“Keep her down and someone get Umdal, she didn’t get the full dose!”
The voice seemed to echo through her head as she struggled against weight holding her to the ground, a knee jabbed into her back as she tried to push herself up, slamming her back down.
“Take it easy, Rey. No one wants to hurt you,” Pava spoke from somewhere behind her and she snarled. Her saber was on the ground maybe six feet away, and she reached her hand out, trying to tap into the force to summons it, but it only twitched, her grasp on the force was muted and fuzzy. Whatever they had drug her with was preventing her from using it fully.
Pava seemed to notice what she was trying to do. She walked into her line of view, bending down and picking up the lightsaber, clipping it to her belt before stepping off to the side and speaking into a comlink clipped on her lapel, “Red team, this is Blue One. We have acquired our target. What’s your status?”
She squirmed again on the ground as she heard the sound of someone jogging towards her. Trying to turn her head to look, but only catching boots and the cuffs of trousers that looked like a Resistance medic’s uniform.
The voices talking above her, intermingling with the voices coming from Pava’s comlink
“Blue One, this is Red One.”
“...how much did she get?” the voice above her asked.
“The dart took a glancing blow, and she got it out quick.”
“...acquired our target… but” the voice from the comlink cut through, and even in through the haze of the drugs she realized the only thing that could mean. Kylo… and if they got Kylo what about… She started to thrash again, lifting her head up enough that she could see Pava.
The medic dropped to his knee next to her, “Hold her down, damn it!”
“...Jess there are two kids down here…”
Pava blinked, looking confused a second before a startled realization spread across her face, “Oh hell,” she grabbed the comlink, “Get them both, damn it… I---”
She let out sound that was somewhere between a shriek and a snarl. They could take her, but no one was going near Sol and Skye. She shoved herself up, sending the man holding her down tumbling backwards. Her hand stretched out and she herself connect with a thread of the force, ripping her saber from Pava’s belt and sending it to her hand. Staggering to her feet, she ignited it, a growl ripping from her throat as she raised it.
Then there was a sharp pain in the back of her thigh and she stumbled, swinging the saber almost drunkenly as she took a swipe at the medic behind her, syringe in hand. He dove backwards and she took another step towards him before falling to her hands and knees, saber disengaging as it hit the ground.
They were on her again, but she could barely feel them. The drugs were claiming her, pulling her down towards unconsciousness. She was vaguely aware of her hands being pulled back and restrained.
The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was Pava kneeling in front of her, voice soft as she spoke, “We won’t hurt them, Rey. I promise you, we won’t hurt them.”
They were running as fast as they could, but he could still hear the footfalls of the strangers giving chase. His mind was flooded with fear and horror and anger and he couldn’t focus on anything other than running, running as fast as he could towards the surface. They’d find Mom, and she would help them, help Dad, and it would be okay again.
The corridor that lead back to the surface portion of the base was long and dark, reaching near blackness in the middle. The end end was blindingly bright with the light from the surface. As he reached the end, barreling from the dark to the light, his eyes closed involuntarily as the brightness stung them.
Skye let out a shriek and her hand was wrenched from his. In the same moment he was jerked to the side by his tunic and he screamed. Blinking his eyes in the brightness he saw a man holding Skye as she struggled and kicked. The men chasing them came up from behind and the man holding him by his tunic’s collar grabbed his shoulder in a painfully tight grip, pulling him hard backwards. He screamed on panic, tears streaming down his face as he flailed his arms wildly.
“Settle down gods damn it!” A voice snarled into his ear.
The man holding Skye yelped as she kicked his knees, “Kriff!” He shouted at some of the others, “Quit laughing you damn sculags and grab her legs! She's kicking the shit out my knees!”
One of his wrists were caught, holding the arm still, the grip on his shoulder squeezing tighter. In a blind panic he turned his head and bit the hand on his shoulder hard. The man cried out and his hold loosened just enough that he was able to break free.
He started to run, but only got a step or two before he found himself being flung to the ground, stars bursting behind his eyes as his chin slammed into the metal floor. A knee slammed into his back, pinning him down.
“Easy, Deece! He’s just a kid!”
“Kriffing brat bit me,” the voice above him spat angrily.
“We got anymore of that sedative?”
“Yeah, dosed for someone five times their weight. You know how much of that druk is safe to give them?”
He sobbed, terror somehow growing worse, struggling against the weight pinning him down.
“I don't know, give them a fifth of it,” the man pinning him snapped. “Even if it just makes ‘em tired it's---”
In his terror he reached out and shoved… not with his hands but his mind. The man holding him down went tumbling back off of him, letting out a startled yelp.
He scrambled to his feet, but then two more of them were grabbing him. Shrieking, he struggled as a woman rushed forward and he cried as something stabbed his arm.
The world seemed to get fuzzy, the air heavy. The woman spoke, but her voice seemed to distort and echo in his head.
“Gave him a sixth of that… hope it isn't too much…”
Skye was still screaming. He drooped against the arms holding him, his legs sagging.
“Give that damn girl some too,” were the last words he heard before blackness took him.
Notes:
I did warn you this bit of domestic bliss was about to be destroyed last chapter.
I hope the writing from the perspective of the kids works. I haven't been five in 32 years, so it's not easy to take that point of view and get into a child's head.
The Resistance knew Kylo and Rey were on that moon. They had no idea the two had kids. Not that it really helps make them seem like that much less assholes in this chapter.
We're going to see some old faces soon. Tired, war worn old faces who might be making some unfortunate decisions in a desperate time.
There will also be some more flashbacks from both Kylo and Rey. I intend to slowly expand their relationship to show how they got to where they are now.
*hugs and kisses* to all my readers and extra kisses to the commenters
Chapter 3
Summary:
“You intend to take the blame for this, Jess? Really?”
“No, I do.” She turned sharply to look at Poe with a glare that five years ago he would have quaked under. But not now, no, now he met her furious gaze with a calm one, “This was my operation. So if you want to blame someone, blame me.” He gave her a pained smile, “Which is convenient considering you already are blaming me for all of this. Just add another item to the list.”
“Do you find this funny, Admiral? Because I don’t .”
“No, General, I do not,” Poe’s voice was serious. He glanced over at Deece and Pava, “You two are dismissed.”
They gave a curt nod and hurried away as fast as they could.
“This entire operation---” she snapped as Poe stepped forward.
“I know. We know. You hate this. You were against it. You want to punch me in the nose because I got you pushed out of the decision process in regards to it. I know.” He shook his head at her, “I’m not apologizing, General. Not for getting the council to push you out for conflict of interest. Not for the operation. Not for tracking Rey down. Not for the fact that we have your son in chains and he’s going to pay for the things he’s done.”
Notes:
So I just saw TLJ and HOLY SHIT THAT MOVIE.
Okay, sorry, now that that's at least momentarily out of my system... here's a nice big update. I don't know why but my chapters for this fic seem to be trending on the long side. Enjoy.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
She felt completely drained as she made her way back to the transport, trying her best to hold herself upright and give the illusion of being in control for the rest of the squad. To make it look like she wasn’t fighting to not vomit on her feet.
Why the fuck did Dameron have to request she lead this clusterkriff? Like she needed something else like Acisea to haunt her at night. She hadn’t wanted to be a part of that then and she didn’t want to be a part of this now.
Collapsing into the copilot seat, she swiped a hand across her face, wiping the rainwater that was dripping down from her helmet before pulling the helmet off and dropping it unceremoniously to the floor. Burying her face in her hands for a moment, she took several shaky breaths before letting her hands drop, reaching over to the com.
“Base, this is Blue One, do you copy?”
“Copy, Blue One. Everything okay, Commander?”
There were footsteps behind her. She glanced over her shoulder to see a pair of her men carrying Rey into the transport to secure her the rear hold. “Yes, targets have been acquired and everyone is accounted for,” she closed her eyes. “But I need to speak with either General Tico or Admiral Dameron.”
“Okay, hold on…”
The cockpit fell silent and she leaned back in the chair, trying not to hear Rey’s accusing voice in her head.
“What in the nine levels of hell were you thinking!?” a voice shrieked outside the shuttle.
It sounded like Umdal. What the hell...
“Jess, Dameron and Tico aren’t available right now,”
She sighed, of course they weren’t.
“Those drugs weren’t dosed for children!” Umdal continued to rant outside. She looked back towards the hatch with growing concern.
“Okay, um, just have one of them contact me as soon as they can.”
There was a loud clunking of steps and she glanced over to see Umdal coming aboard, followed by Tromans and Rorke, each holding a tiny figure in their arms. Her heart fluttered. If those idiots had hurt those kids she was going to kill someone.
“How much did you give them?” Umdal snapped.
“Maybe a sixth of the full dose,” Tromans answered, pushing her hair back. “I was trying to be conservative, Deece had said to give a fifth.”
“Deece is an idiot, a fifth could have killed them. A sixth is way too much, children metabolize the sedative and force suppressant far faster than an adult does.” Umdal rattled on as he stormed towards the storage lockers in the back.
“If we can’t get them, you want Organa?” she looked back at the com, paling slightly. Oh, no, no, no. She did not want to speak to Organa right now, not at all. Nope. This whole mission had been a pile of bantha druk and someone else was going to get to tell Organa about this.
“No. Tico or Dameron. Don’t even mention that I’m requesting one of the others to call to General Organa.”
“Okay, see you when you get back, Commander.”
She cut off the com and jumped to her feet, hurrying over to where the small group stood over the unconscious children, “What the hell is going on?” When she caught a glimpse of the boy’s bruises and bloody chin, her fists clenched, “The hell happened to him?!”
Tromans flinched and Rorke looked down at his feet. From the hatch Deece spoke, irritation sharp in his tone, “You said to capture them and we captured them.”
“Catch them doesn't mean you beat up a kriffing baby,” she snapped, spinning before storming over, and snarling into his face.
“He bit me and was trying to get away,” Deece.
From the corner of her eye she saw Umdal bending over the boy. “What are you doing?” she snapped at him.
Umdal said nothing until he finished injecting the contents of a syringe into the kids vein. Pulling a second syringe out, he glanced at her as he walked over to the little girl, “Saving their livers from the overdose these morons gave them.” He glared between Tromans, Rorke, and Deece, before turning his attention to the girl.
She turned back to Deece, feeling completely livid. He scowled, looking down, “They were freaking out.”
“Of course they were freaking out! They're, what? Three or four? They--”
“I'd say five, or four going on five,” Umdal cut in, voice clinical.
She rolled her eyes,”Okay, so five. Of course they freaked out. They were probably scared out of their minds.”
“Figured it would be easier for them if they were sedated,” Deece looked up but made sure to look anywhere but at her.
“Easier for them, or easier for you?”
His teeth ground together and he finally turned his head to make eye contact. “Look, Commander , we weren’t prepared for having to corral and wrangle children. They were fighting like panicked loth cats. The boy kriffing bit me. I made the call to sedate them before we hurt them trying to restrain them.”
“You guys can’t restrain a pair of five year olds without drugging them, that’s what your telling me?”
Deece stepped forward, crowding into her space, “That kid used the force to throw me off of him, so yeah, I’m not going to apologize for knocking them out.”
“The kid… used the force,” she said, incredulous.
“Something knocked Deece backwards,” Tromans interrupted. “We all saw it.”
She took a step back, rubbing the heels of her hands against her eyes, “Those kids…” Shaking her head, she glanced at the boy again. Umdal was applying bacta to his chin. The resemblance to Rey was undeniable, and for a second she heard Rey’s voice again, you tried to kill me. Taking a deep breath she looked between Tromans, Rorke, and Deece, “Do you guys have any idea how fucked we’d be if one of these kids got seriously hurt?”
“It’s not like we knew they’d be---”
“Shut up,” she snapped, spinning to face Deece again. “These kids, they have to be Rey and Kylo Ren’s. You realize that, don’t you?”
He folded his arms, looking at her indifferently. His entire attitude seemed to say so what? So what if the kids of a traitor and war criminal were hurt during this operation? She resisted the urge to throttle him.
“They’re Rey’s kids, and we need Rey’s cooperation. How much help is she going to be willing to give us if one of her kids were hurt or killed today?”
Deece didn’t look particularly moved by that argument. She stepped forward and jabbed her finger into his chest, “Risking the entire point of this mission not enough to bother you? How about this fact you may have been too dumb to put together? Those are very likely General Organa’s grandchildren.” He blinked at that and she nodded, “Yeah, I’m going to have to answer to her over this shitshow.”
The com beeped and she took a step back, looking at Umdal, “They’re going to be okay?”
“Yes. All of them will.”
She nodded, heading back to the cockpit, collapsing into the seat and hitting the com, “This is Blue One.”
“Jess?” Dameron’s voice came through, “Is everything okay? Control said you reported success but needed to talk to us?”
“We’re fine, Admiral. Minor injuries were incurred by Red team, nothing too bad. Both targets have been subdued.”
There was a long pause and then Poe spoke again, voice quiet, “Good.” She heard him take a breath, and his voice lifted, sounding more like himself, “What do you need then, Jess? Other than a commendation for what you did today?”
She let out a scoffing noise, not minding that he was going to hear, before leaning forward on the com, “There’s something else. Something we didn’t account for, Poe. And you’re not going to like this…”
“Kids?” Finn leaned against the wall, face incredulous. “Rey had kids with that---”
He waved his hand, cutting Finn off, “Twins, from what the medic told Pava. About five years old.”
Finn shook his head, absentmindedly playing with the simple metal band on his ring finger. It was a habit, a tell, he knew, something the man did while he was thinking. “We spent months on intel. Found ports they’d do their supply runs to a few times a year. Nothing, absolutely nothing, ever even implied they had children.”
Leave it to Finn to view this as a personal failure for not having finding out everything before hand. It was one of the reasons why the two of them worked well together--- Finn was a planner, a meticulous one. It was a great counterbalance to his own… impulsive… command style. He commanded a little too much like he flew, haphazard and willing to go on instinct. They balanced each other, and it worked well.
“Look,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. “No reason to beat yourself up over this. We knew that we were going in partially blind on this. And we pulled it off, we got exactly what we went in for…” Licking his lips, he paused, knowing Finn wasn’t going to like where he was about to take this, “What we went in for and even some bonus collateral.”
“Bonus?” Finn’s brow furrowed a second and then his eyes widened, “No.”
“Buddy… listen…”
A pair of officers walked by and they both fell silent until the two passed. Finn leaned forward, speaking in a hissing whisper, “I’m not going to use a threat against her children to get her to cooperate with us!”
“We aren’t going to threaten them, for fucks sake, Finn, what do you think I am?” He leaned forward, “But the fact is, she isn’t going to be able to have them with her if she’s imprisoned. So it’s in her best interest to have us drop those charges.”
“I really hate this,” Finn muttered, rubbing his eyes.
“I know, my man, but your plan is coming together and this probably made it easier for us.”
Finn frowned, but nodded, before beginning to play with his ring again, “So that leaves one more thing for us to figure out here… Who’s going to explain this to Leia?”
She stood at the window of the observation room, staring at the tiny girl who was huddled on the cot in the corner, hugging her knees. Kalonia was crouched in front of the girl, trying her best to keep her movements slow and the exam as uninvasive as possible.
Grandchildren. She had grandchildren .
The disbelief she had felt when Poe told her fizzled into smoke when she saw them. The boy took more after Rey, but she saw Ben in the shape of his eyes. The girl… she looked so much like Ben when he was that age. Just looking at her brought back enough memories that she felt like she had to fight to breath. Between the weight of the past falling over her and the absolute fury racing through her veins like ice water, she was a mess.
Kalonia got up, saying something softly to the girl who just stared in wide-eyed terror, before leaving the room. She heard the door open and shut, but her eyes never left the girl, not even as the footsteps approached and she saw Kalonia leaning against the window next to her in her peripheral vision.
“They’re terrified and groggy from the drugs, but Umdal thankfully had the sense to give them biodine to counteract the effects of the overdose of the sedative, so they’re not in any danger. The boy has some bruising and a nasty scrape on his chin, but the bacta’s already going to work on that.”
Her teeth gritted together, someone was going to answer to her about what happened on that damn moon, “Did they say anything, Harter? Were you able to get their names?”
Harter shook her head slightly, “They’re too scared right now. Neither is saying anything.”
The sound of footsteps coming down the corridor caught her attention, and she saw Poe trailed by Commander Pava and Lieutenant Deece. She turned, crossing her arms as they approached. “Why were they separated?” The words came out of her mouth practically as a snarl, almost surprising herself.
Poe blinked, glancing at Pava before looking back at her, “I think it seemed like a good idea to do until they came to and were examined.”
“It’s bad enough we’ve ripped them from their mother and father, they should at least have each other.” She glanced back over her shoulder at the girl, “And moved into a real room.” Poe gave her a short, appeasing nod, watching her carefully, she looked past him towards Pava and Deece, “The treatment these children have had at our hands appears to be completely despicable. I want an explanation!”
Deece looked down at his feet, “We were caught by surprise at their presence ma’am.”
“Being surprised makes it okay to rough up babies, Victor?” She let the full force of her glare fall on the man, “Or give them near overdoses of sedatives?”
“It was a decision made in the spur of the moment,” Pava spoke softly. “The team was taken by surprise, as Lieutenant Deece stated, and a decision was made that was a poor one, I will not deny it. But there was no intent to do harm.”
She gave Pava a long look before looking back at Deece to address him, accusingly, “But it was your team that captured the children, was it not?”
“Yes, ma’am, it was my---”
“I was the Commander in charge of the operation,” Pava snapped, taking a step forward. “If any of my team made mistakes or bad decisions, it is still my responsibility and I will take the blame.”
Irritation coursed through her. Under normal circumstances she’d find a commanding officer standing in the line of fire to protect someone who served under them admirable, but this sure as hell wasn’t normal circumstances. “You intend to take the blame for this, Jess? Really?”
“No, I do.” She turned sharply to look at Poe with a glare that five years ago he would have quaked under. But not now, no, now he met her furious gaze with a calm one, “This was my operation. So if you want to blame someone, blame me.” He gave her a pained smile, “Which is convenient considering you already are blaming me for all of this. Just add another item to the list.”
“Do you find this funny, Admiral? Because I don’t .”
“No, General, I do not,” Poe’s voice was serious. He glanced over at Deece and Pava, “You two are dismissed.”
They gave a curt nod and hurried away as fast as they could.
“This entire operation---” she snapped as Poe stepped forward.
“I know. We know. You hate this. You were against it. You want to punch me in the nose because I got you pushed out of the decision process in regards to it. I know.” He shook his head at her, “I’m not apologizing, General. Not for getting the council to push you out for conflict of interest. Not for the operation. Not for tracking Rey down. Not for the fact that we have your son in chains and he’s going to pay for the things he’s done.”
Her hand cracked across his cheek, but Dameron didn’t flinch. He stared at her stoically, “I will apologize for them,” he nodded towards the observation room. “Our intel gave no indications that Rey and… well, that they had kids. And clearly there were missteps during their apprehension and I apologize for that too.”
She was trembling. She was so angry she was literally trembling. Turning her back on Poe, she walked over to the window to the observation room, folding her arms and taking deep breaths as she stared at the little girl. At her granddaughter.
For what seemed like an eternity they were quiet, then Poe spoke again, “I’m going to have to go. Finn’s going to have a chat with Ren, and I’m going getting the fun task of being the first to talk to Rey.” She didn’t answer. Poe paused before continuing, “I would like to release the children into your care, at least till we have Rey onboard and they can go back to her.”
Glancing at him over her shoulder, she gave a curt nod before looking back at the girl. “I would appreciate that.”
He nodded once before turning and walking away, his heels clicking on the tile as he made his way towards the high security containment cells.
His head was throbbing, a side effect of the drugs he’d been hit with or just a product of the his rage and fear, he couldn't tell.
He had awoken on a durasteel bench, hands chained to the floor. The chain giving him just enough slack to move the few feet from the bench to the toilet next to it. There were force suppression cuffs on his wrists and a force suppression collar around his neck. Charming. If… no when... he managed to break free he would show these bastards he didn't need the force to massacre them. No, all he needed was his bare hands and the righteous fury that was racing through his veins.
Fury and terror. What had happened to Skye and Solan? Had they left Rey alone? Gods, please let them have only taken him. Let Rey and the kids still be on that moon together.
The door rattled and his head shot up, glaring at the door as it opened and he blinked as he recognized the man walking in, flanked by a pair of security guards.
“Traitor,” he spat. The man looked tired, older, but there was no doubt that he was staring at FN-2187.
The man froze, cocking his head slightly. Then FN-2187 just raised his eyebrows, “Now that is the pot calling the kettle black.”
He didn't respond. The reminder that he too had betrayed the First Order when he had run with Rey was not missed, but he didn't care right now. There was murder in his eyes as he glowered at the traitor who turned, walking to pick up a metal chair from the corner of the room.
“What happened to my children?” he growled, his rage not entirely hiding the fear behind the words.
The man didn’t answer, just brought the chair over to the center of the room, setting it down just beyond the reach of his chains. The longer the silence dragged on the greater his panic grew. FN-2187 sat down and glanced over his shoulder at the guards, “Wait outside the door.”
“General Tico?” one of the guards glanced warily over to him before back to the traitor, “Are you--”
“Yes,” FN-2187 answered, curtly, turning his attention back to him. As both guards left, he began to fiddle with a ring on his left hand, looking down, “You know my wife and I… we’ve discussed having kids a few times, but the state of things, the galaxy being such a mess, it always brought us up short. Seemed unfair to them, to bring them into such turmoil.”
He concentrated on his breathing as the traitor babbled. Fear and rage were brewing into a storm he wasn’t sure he could contain if he didn’t get an answer soon.”
“I give you and Rey credit for being able to take that leap,” he paused. “The children are fine. They’re here. As is Rey. Dameron and I flipped a coin to see which of us got to talk to you and which had to go face her. I came up the lucky one.”
Letting go of the breath he was holding, he flashed his teeth at the man, “I want to see them.”
“Too bad.” FN-2187 folded his arms, “As a representative of the Resistance and the remains of the Republic, I, General Finn Tico, am here to present the charges against you.”
“Fuck your charges. I want to see my children. I want to see Rey.”
“You are hereby charged with participating in the mass murder of billions, as well as torture, murder, and slaughter of civilians. You will stand trial for these crimes. Possible sentences range from death to life imprisonment.” He snarled, jerking his chains, and FN-2187, Finn, whatever the hell the traitor was called now. Wanting nothing more than choke the life out of the man.
“I should have killed you on Starkiller,” he spat.
Finn just shrugged, almost tiredly, “Yeah, well, you came close, but you didn’t.” He let his arms drop, his gaze shifting to his hand as he played with his ring again. “You will most likely see Rey again, but that depends on her and if she cooperates with us.”
“If this is about me just let them go,” a touch of desperation seeped into his tone.
“Unfortunately, this isn’t about you,” Finn looked up again. “Not that having you stand trial isn’t going to be a needed morale boost, but your not the one we’re after here. And what happens to you will depend entirely on Rey.”
He blinked. If this was about Rey--- “I’m the carrot. You’re going offer to spare me for her to what? Help you?”
“Pretty much. There are charges against her as well that we’ll be willing to drop. And if she aids us, we take execution off the table as a possible sentence for you. So right now, all we want from you is to be a good boy and not cause trouble. Those cuffs and that collar are both wired that if you get any of them off we’ll be alerted. And any one of them should be enough to block force access, so good luck getting all of them off before we know about it.” Finn stood, picking the chair back up and setting it back in the corner.
There was a growing incredulity at this entire situation. He shook his head as Finn made his way towards the door, unable to keep himself from calling out, “You think Rey’s going to become the Resistance’s lap dog that easily, then you never knew her as well as you thought you did.”
Finn stopped, his hand on the door, glancing over his shoulder, “She already proved that when she ran away with a monster and murderer. But we’ll see.”
Without another word, the man left, leaving him to brood in his anger and fear.
Anger, fury, rage, none of those were valid descriptions of what she was feeling right now. She was beyond furious, beyond livid, it was sustaining her now, beating back the hangover effects of the drug they gave her and giving her a hawklike focus as she paced her cell.
If anything had happened to Kylo… if the sons of bitches even touched her kids… Then gods help these bastards, no suppression cuffs or collar was going to keep her from delivering retribution.
She continued to pace between the small cot attached to the wall, the small metal tray table that hung from the opposite wall with a pair of metal chairs, and the toilet. Mind racing and blood rushing in her ears, until the creak of the cell door lock being turned startled her. Spinning, she faced the door, bound hands clutched to her chest and her teeth bared.
The door opened, a man slipping into the room. She blinked. He had aged a lot in the last six years, worry lines and wrinkles now etched into his face, his hair greying now at the temples. His eyes seemed more tired, but the small smile he gave her as the same as the one she remembered. The one he used to give her over his drink on the nights that they had some downtime and would go to a cantina, him and Jess and Finn and Rose and her.
“Poe.” She breathed the name more than spoke it, her teeth still gritted together. Her bound hands clenched into fists, nails digging into the palms of her hands.
“Hey, Rey,” he answered, almost cautiously, as he stood in front of the cell door. The two of them just stared at each other before he nodded at the tray table and the two chairs, “Why don’t you sit down and we can talk?”
“Where are my children? Where’s Kylo?” she hissed, not moving.
Poe looked at her and then gave a short nod again at the chairs, “They’re fine. Just fine. Even Ren, for now at least. Now sit down, Rey.”
“I want to see them.” She still didn’t move from the spot she was standing in, even as Poe walked cautiously by her and sat in one of the metal chairs, leaning back and slouching slightly, legs held out straight.
“You will,” he watched her carefully. “In time. But we need to talk first.”
“Where are they?” she blinked, eyes stinging, “I want to know where they are.”
“Sit first.”
“Kriff off.”
Poe just folded his arms, looking at her before turning his gaze meaningfully at the seat, then back to her. She gritted her teeth, before stalking over and dropping in the chair hard, leaning on the tray table towards him. He gave a small smile again and she considered lunging across that tray table and using her bound hands to give him a two handed punch to his nose before he spoke, regarding her with gentle eyes, “The kids are here, they’re being looked after. I promise you nothing is going to happen to them.”
“Kylo?” her voice shook, ever so slightly.
The gentleness left quickly, “In a cell. Until his trial.”
She growled, it was a feral sound, “I want to talk to Organa.”
“Organa’s not the only one in charge now, Rey. But I’m sure she’ll want to talk to you too.”
Frowning, her eyes darted to the rank badge on his jacket before looking back at him, “I see you’ve moved up in the world. Is that your way of telling me you were behind this?”
“I’m one of them. Your seizure was my operation,” he studied her. “And it’s my way of warning you that Organa has no say in any of this. Conflict of interest.”
She blinked again, her eyes wet, willing herself not to cry, not now, “Why? We weren’t hurting anyone, why go through all this effort for us?”
There was a long pause before Poe sat up and leaned an elbow on the table. He opened his mouth, then shut it, seeming to reconsider what he was about to say before finally speaking, “We need your help, Rey.”
“My help?” She stared incredulously. “You attacked us, kidnapped us, kidnapped my children , and you think I’m going to help you?”
“The First Order, they’re building something. A weapon. But we’re not entirely sure what it is,” he seemed to be ignoring her outburst. “And give we’re currently pinned back, investigating is next to impossible. We want to attack some key First Order bases, see if we can’t get some breathing room, before going in and finding out what they’re doing before it’s too late. We could use a little Jedi help in all this.”
“I’m not a Jedi,” she snapped.
“Close enough.”
“You’ve got Skywalker. Talk to him and leave me out of this.”
Poe sighed, rubbing his forehead, “Yeah, so, Skywalker… we don’t know where he is.”
She blinked, her mouth open slightly before she brought her hands up so she could rub the bridge of her nose, “Of course you don’t.”
“And, the thing is, he’s kind of flaked out on us before. More than once. At least once a year, if I would be honest about it.”
Her eyes rolled in exasperation, “Of course he does.” That was typical of the man she’d come to know. Luke was amazing until he wasn’t. He’d be at your side, have your back, and then he’d be gone, leaving you to fend for yourself while he was off trying to get his head together.
“Here’s the thing…” Poe continued, “He was going to investigate what the First Order was doing. So right now we don’t know if he was captured, killed, or just decided he was out again and went to find some secluded place to meditate on the will of the force or some shit like that.”
She dropped her hands, “None of this is my problem. What could possibly make you think I’d help you after what you just did to me and my family?”
Poe fell quiet, his fingers tapping on the metal table, before he looked up again to meet her gaze, his own darkening slightly, “Because we have Kylo Ren. And he’s going to face justice for his crimes, Rey. He’ll have his trial, be convicted easily, and be sentenced to death.” She drew in a sharp breath, through gritted teeth, and he leaned towards her again, “And you, Rey, are currently charged with aiding and abetting a wanted war criminal, at the least. There’s a lot of people who would like to charge you with treason. Either way, you’re going to spend the next twenty plus years in a jail cell.” He leaned back again, spreading his hands, “But help us, and we’ll make a deal. We’ll see your sentence reduced to probation. You’ll be allowed to live here under supervision with your kids, and we’ll take the death penalty off the table for Ren. He’ll be able to live out his life in a cell.”
It seemed like all of her emotion fell away, leaving her numb as his words rattled in her head. She took a breath, steadying herself as she realized the full implications of what he was saying. The choice he was giving her wasn’t freedom versus incarceration, no… it was merely the type of imprisonment she’d be given. They didn’t intend to let her leave the base, leave the Resistance. She might be more comfortable than in a cell, but her freedom would be limited to the length of the leash they decided to give her.
And Kylo… Kylo might not die but he’d be left to rot in prison the rest of his life.
Bantha druk. She leaned back, accessing Poe with a cold glare. “You know what, Poe? You can take your deal and shove it up your ass.”
He frowned, sitting up straight, shaking his head, “If you don’t think we’re serious about this, Rey…”
“Oh, you're serious. But you know what I think? I think you’re also desperate. You burned resources and time to find me and to take us down. You think I’m your only hope.”
Anger began to creep into Poe’s eyes as he shook his head, “Don’t push us, Rey. Think of your kids…”
“You want my help? Fine. I’ll help you.” She glowered at Poe, “But when it’s over me, Kylo, Skye, and Sol are leaving here together. We’re leaving and you’ll never bother us again.”
Poe took a deep breath, his cheek twitching slightly, giving away his growing anger at how this was going, “No.”
“Yes. Those are my terms,” she set her bound hands on the table, interlacing them since she couldn’t fold her arms with the restraints on.
She didn’t flinch as Poe’s fist smashed into the table, “You are not in a position to dictate terms, Rey. Kylo Ren is guilty of war crimes. He participated in the deaths of billions .”
“He had no control over Starkiller or the decision to use it,” she shook her head. “He---”
“Yeah? What about when he ordered an entire village slaughtered? I was there on Jakku, I heard him give the order to kill everyone in Tuanal.” Poe took a breath, “Ren is going to pay for what he has done, and that is not negotiable.”
Her chair clattered to the ground as she jumped to her feet, “Then we have nothing to talk about.” She turned her back on him, feeling Poe’s eyes burning into her back as she laid down on the bunk, her back towards him.
“Don’t do this, Rey. Think of your kids. You just going to abandon them? They need you.”
His words cut straight through her soul, but she refused to answer, not even to vocalize the fuck you she was throwing at him mentally. Poe’s response was solidifying her resolve. They needed her. She didn’t need them. They had thought she’d cave quickly to their demands.
They underestimated her.
She closed her eyes. After a few minutes she heard Poe get to his feet and stomp out of the room, slamming the cell door closed as he left. She let out a rattling breath and prayed to the gods that her family would be okay.
Notes:
Lot of different POVs in this chapter, but I think it works. Rey v. Poe at the end there was fun to write. Momma bear is very very pissed right now, but she ain't stupid. As Kylo said, if they thought she'd fall to heel that easily and become their little lap dog, they were mistaken.
The poor twins, hopefully I'll at least be able to reunite them with their momma soon.
Oh, if you didn't guess already, FinnRose is very much a thing here. Finn took her last name when they got married, hence, General Tico.
Thank you all for the kudos and comments. I really hope everyone's liking this fic so far. Please leave me comments, they sustain me and give me life :)
Chapter 4
Summary:
“Finn,” it was more breathed out than spoken. And he looked up slowly, not able to hide the emotion in his eyes, Finn never could. The sadness and hurt in them could be read like a book. He had been her first and closest friend, and that pain in his eyes had been caused by her, by her betrayal.
“Rey,” he nodded, speaking almost as softly as she had. “Been awhile.”
She blinked, looking away, “So you’re involved in this too?”
He didn’t answer, the only response was the sound of his footsteps drawing closer. She looked up when he stopped, standing maybe six feet away, “You know we had three rescue attempts… after you were captured. They failed, obviously. Lost a lot of good men though. Lots of good men trying to save you.” Finn looked down at his hands, fidgeting with a ring on one of his fingers, before shrugging, “And I didn’t believe it, for the longest time I held out… hope, I guess… that you were being held against your will. That you hadn’t abandoned everything you had believed in and went willingly with a monster.”
“He’s not a monster,” she took a shaky breath.
Finn looked up, “Really? I take it he was just completely misunderstood by us on Starkiller?”
Notes:
This fic is like a spoiled child. As soon as I start trying to pay attention to my other fics, it refuses to leave me alone and demands I work on it.
I am going to try to cycle through all my other WIPs before working on the next chapter of this, but this fic may have other ideas about that.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
There had been several close calls before Batuu, close enough that she’d see him, but not close enough that they’d crossed sabers. Luke was with her on those missions, and had been able to intercede and come to her aid the two times that she had been very close to being cornered. He was there, and the times she’d seen him she had seen his head turn, his mask’s visor seeming to follow her movements as she ran.
Luke was, well Luke. He was a good teacher, once she learned to deal with his periodic mood swings. They’d make good progress for awhile, her mastery of the force growing, and then he’d hit a down spell, and either become intolerable, snappish and demanding, or simply refuse to come out of his room for a week or more as he meditated and tried to find “balance.” A year, nearly two, passed, and she learned to rely on him, unstable mentor that he was.
A few weeks before Batuu was the first time he actually left. From what Poe had said she gathered it wasn’t the last. When the mission had come up, they’d all looked to her, and for the first time she found herself in charge and alone, her and a small team. It wasn’t supposed to be risky. Go, find the informant, get the information, get out.
Except it hadn’t been easy. The First Order had been waiting when they went into the sketchy cantina to meet their man, and she sensed the ambush too late. The stormtroopers were on them and the rest of team were shot down before she could even draw her saber.
She had managed to fight her way out of the cantina, through at least a dozen stormtroopers, bolting down one alley just to find another squadron waiting. She’d force thrown them, running down what seemed like an endless maze of alleyways, until she’d dove around a corner to find him waiting. Stumbling backwards, she’d raised the saber up in defense, even as she heard the troopers closing in around her.
Ren’s head had cocked, ever so slightly, his saber in hand but not yet ignited. The mask was blank and emotionless, and yet a small head tilt seemed to carry so much emotion. It made him seemed curious, as if she was some sort of puzzle he was trying to understand.
“Surrender.”
One word, it rumbled through the vocoder of his mask. She fought panic as she raised her saber, eyes darting at the troopers surrounding her as she took a small step back before spinning and shoving the troopers backwards with the force. There was a crackling noise and she turned, blocking as Ren’s red saber came down hard enough to send her staggering back.
“You insist on fighting?” his voice rumbled.
She only snarled, and his head tilted again before lunging, driving her back with two more blows before slamming her back and pinning his blade against hers, pushing her back towards the wall of troopers behind her as she struggled to hold him at bay.
There was barely time to register the movement behind her before she felt something stab into her shoulder, Ren suddenly breaking his lock against her saber and jumping back as she swiped at him before trying to turn on whoever had attacked her from behind. But before she could she staggered, her head spinning.
Drugged. Through the thickening haze in her mind the realization hit her, and she turned again, stumbling towards Ren, saber up, still determined to fight till she fell. But she had no strength at all left, he batted her saber from her hand before turning his own off and stepping closer as she swayed on her feet.
She fell forward, his arms reached out and caught her, pulling her gently against him before sweeping her up into his arms. Even then, she raised a fist and batted it at his chest, but there was no strength behind it. Her fist might as well have been a gnat bouncing off the hide of a rancor.
His head tilted down, watching her as her hand slapped at him with ever weakening force. For some reason, she thought he was amused, and when he spoke she thought she could hear it in his modulated voice, “Such spirit for a garbage picker. But your fight is lost.”
Her anger surged, and she balled her fist and hammered it against him for one last blow.
The last thing she had heard, cradled in Ren’s arms, before she succumbed to whatever she’d been injected with, was Ren’s laugh barking through the vocoder.
The room was small, a pair of beds, a table and chairs, and a small ‘fresher. But it was actual living quarters, and they were together. Eventually she’d need to move them into her own quarters, if they were going to remain in her care. That seemed like it would be overly stressful for them now, so this seemed like a better option.
She sat at the table across from them as they colored pieces of flimsi. Neither had said anything since their arrival, as far as she knew, or would answer any questions. They still didn’t know their names. She didn’t know her grandchildren’s names.
Her sense was the girl was going to be the harder one to break through. She was brooding and ornery, and perhaps even more angry than fearful. It was probably her imagination, but the look those intense hazel eyes gave her seemed accusatory and judging.
The boy, though, seemed more afraid than angry, much more open and vulnerable. She looked down at the boy’s drawing. The scrawls and scribbles of colors were hard to make out, but it looked like a building, surrounded by green scrawls that might have been plants. “What’s this a picture of?”
He looked down at it, his sister sitting up straighter and giving him a warning glance.. The boy looked at his sister, then to her, then the drawing, before grabbing a crayon and leaning back over the flimsi, “Home.”
It was the first word either of them had said, and it tore at her heart. They’d been taken from the only place they’d ever known, ripped from their family, and worse yet dragged to the center of a conflict that was far beyond their ability to comprehend. Ben and Rey had kept them far away from all of this for a reason, managed to keep their existence secret for a reason.
She decided to press while he was opening himself up a bit, “It looks very nice.” Pausing, she leaned down, “It looks like there was a lot of green things… were there a lot of green plants?”
“Except in winter, everything turns brown in the winter,” he didn’t look up, fiddling with a crayon as he stared at the flimsi in front of him. “Until the rains come to turn everything green again.”
“What’s your name?” This is what she wanted, more than anything right now.
He looked up sharply, a frown on his face, before glancing at his sister who was positively glaring at her. The girl’s eyes might be hazel instead of brown, but the intensity was the same as she’d remembered in her son’s eyes.
“Why won’t you tell us your names?” she asked, gently, giving a small smile. “I just want to know what to call you? I’m Leia.”
“What happened to Daddy?” the girl asked, sharply. The accusation was clear in her tone.
She swallowed, “He’s fine.” It felt like a lie even if she knew Ben was physically unhurt for now, he certainly was anything but fine.
“They hurt him,” the boy blurted out, his bottom lip trembling.
“I know,” she kept her voice soft, nodding, “but he’s okay.”
His brown eyes were wet, on the brink of tears, “I want my Mom and Dad.”
“You’ll see them soon,” she said, maybe a little too quickly. She would need to at least let them visit Rey, for their sake. Neither Poe or Finn were going to keep that from happening, if they knew what was good for them.
“I want my daddy now,” the girl glared, an angry scowl on her face. The rage coming from her seemed too big for someone that small to contain. It was as if the low, brooding anger she’d had the entire time was beginning to flare into an inferno.
It made her apprehensive on almost an instinctive level, even as the logical part of her mind reminded her this was only a little girl. She shook her head, “You can’t yet, but you’ll see your mother soon.”
“I want my dad now,” her tiny hands gripped the flimsi in front of her, tearing it as she balled her hands into fists.
“Just calm down…”
The girl’s voice grew higher, edging to near hysterics, “ I WANT TO SEE MY DADDY NOW! ” As she screamed, she brought her fists pounding down onto the table. A miniature tantrum that should have been now more than noise as she banged the metal. Instead, the metal groaned and rippled under the force of impact, the crayons and flimsi being sent flying by the force of impact. The boy shoved himself backwards, startled, tipping his chair over and landing sprawled on the floor, while his sister just sat frozen, eyes wide as she stared down at the now bent and slightly twisted table.
She herself sat frozen, staring in disbelief. This wasn’t possible, they were too young…
They looked confused and terrified. The girl’s eyes were wide and lips trembling. Slowly she looked up for the table and burst into tears.
It seemed to take a second before she convinced her body to move. Hurrying around the to the other side of the table, she knelt next to the girls chair, doing her best to comfort her, “It’s okay. No one’s going to be upset with you for this…” She reached her hand up, pushing some of the girl’s black locks out of her eyes, “Calm down…”
The girl looked and it seemed as if they connected, at least for a moment. Then the girl’s eyes hardened and she jerked away, almost falling from the chair as she jumped out of it and ran across the room, huddling in a corner and hugging her knees as she sobbed.
The boy pulled himself to his feet, sparing one more frightened look at the table before scurrying across the room to sit next to his sister.
She got up, wanting nothing more than to go and wrap them both in her arms but knowing right now that would only make things worse. Instead she left, leaving them to comfort one another, and headed down towards the cell blocks.
Ben was the only force sensitive child she was aware of, not that there was a lot of information out there to go by, whose powers had seemed to awaken and grow outside of his ability to control while he was still young. Herself, Luke, even Rey as far as she knew, had been completely unaware consciously of their own force sensitivity until they were exposed later on. And Ben had reached his teens by the time his issues had happened. But at five years old?
She needed to talk to Rey, and those kids needed to see their mother.
Leia and Poe were at each other’s throats when he walked into the room.
“Do I even want to know?” They were inches from each other’s faces, practically snarling. He walked over and leaned on the wall wearily, his fingers immediately going to fidget with his wedding ring. Seemed like the few months, with Rose off base, he’d been doing it more and more. Probably because she wasn’t there to punch him in the shoulder when she caught him doing it.
“I was informing the General that my prisoner is not getting any visitation for the time being.”
Leia’s finger was instantly in Poe’s face, “Listen, Admiral , you have no right to bar me from any prisoners.”
“Are we talking about Ren?” he asked.
Poe’s brown eyes snapped to look at him, “No, Rey. She’s off limits as of now from anyone other than you or me.”
“You don’t have the authority---”
He didn’t let Leia finish, “Why are we not allowing General Organa to visit the prisoner?” Poe let out an exasperated sigh, but he just folded his arms, feeling agitated. On principle alone, the idea that an Admiral had the authority to block a General, or a General to block and Admiral, was absurd and irked him. The highest rank in the Navy was on equal footing with the highest rank in the Army.
“Rey’s not cooperating,” Poe snapped, giving him a glare as if he’d expected him to have his back on something like this. “I want her to have some time alone to let the gravity of this situation hit her.”
“You think Rey’s going to become the Resistance’s lap dog that easily, then you never knew her as well as you thought you did.”
Ren’s words echoed in his head and he closed his eyes, a headache beginning to pound behind his eyes. “She flat out refused?”
Poe stiffened, turning and walking over to his desk, sorting through some folders and datapads aimlessly, “I offered her a deal and she told me to kriff off.”
He frowned, the thing about Rey, unless she’d really changed, was that she still was a scavenger at heart. She was good at bargaining, good at haggling. It had made her a good negotiator during her time with the Resistance. It was hard to believe she’d not try to work things to her advantage. “Did you try to negotiate?”
“She’s not in a position to negotiate,” Poe slammed a datapad down onto the desk. “If we decided to charge her with treason she’d spend the rest of her life in a cell, she’ll never see her kids again, and her husband or whatever the fuck Ren is to her is going to be executed.”
Sucking on his bottom lip, he nodded, “So I’m guessing she tried to negotiate and you got pissed and shut it down?”
Poe turned, sitting on the edge of the desk, “She wants to be able to walk away when this is over. Her, her kids, and Ren. They get to leave and we leave them alone.”
A brief silence fell over the room. There were a lot of things they could give in on, but Kylo Ren walking wasn’t one of them. Not after all the things that monster had done.
Then a soft laugh broke the silence, they looked over at Leia, who was shaking her head as she laughed. “That girl. I’ve missed that girl. That smart, stubborn , girl.” She regarded Poe, “Have you forgotten what Rey is like, Admiral? Because if you think you have any chance of breaking her once she’s made up her mind, you’ve forgotten.”
“Your boy’s life depends on her cooperation, General,” Poe snapped. “You might want to hope she’s going to give in, because I have no problem pushing forward with the death penalty for Ren.”
Leia regarded him almost scornfully, “You two think we need her. She’s figured that out already. She won’t cave before you do.”
It was probably a good idea to cut in before this started to escalate, “I’ll try talking to her, but Leia’s right. We might want to think about what we can offer that she might be willing to accept.” Poe’s eyes flashed, but he raised his hand, “And after I talk with her, General Organa has every right to interview the prisoner. Sorry, but she’s right, we have no authority to block her.”
“I want to bring the kids to see her. It might help them calm down.”
“No.” Poe stepped forward, “She ain’t seeing those kids until there’s an agreement.”
“You can’t---”
He waved his hand again, cutting Leia off, “Yeah, he can. You know that he can. He can’t restrict access for a General or a fellow Admiral, but restricting other visitors? You know as well as I do that’s within his authority.”
“They need to see Rey.” Leia hesitated before continuing, “There was an incident. I It's in their, and our, best interest to ease their minds that their parents are okay.”
“An incident?” he asked, quickly, before Poe could say something that would piss her off again.
“The girl had a force outburst.”
He blinked, noticing Poe looking up sharply in his peripheral vision. “I guess it's not surprising that they're force sensitive given their parents… but is that normal? To show powers this young?”
“It's not like we have a lot of information on the subject, but no, not in my experience.”
“According to the members of Red team that apprehended them, the boy force threw Deece off of him,” Poe looked down broodingly. “Maybe we should put force cuffs on them, to be safe.”
“The hell… we are not putting force cuffs on five year olds!” Leia’s eyes blazed as she stalked towards Poe. “Maybe we should let their mother assure them everything is going to be alright?”
“When their mother comes to her senses she can see them.” Poe didn't back down, stepping forward to glare down at Leia.
Against some of his instinctual warnings of self preservation, he pushed his way between the two of them, shoving them apart. “Both of you need to calm down!” he shot a look first to Poe, then Leia, “We’re on the same side here, and we have an end goal.”
“Your end goal. You know what I thought of this from the beginning, it’s why you both worked to make sure I was forced out of the council’s decision to approve or disapprove this.” The cold glare she gave him as she spoke said enough, she was still furious that they both had opted to work around her. It had essentially been a power grab, whether he liked to think of it that way or not, and it had worked.
“I’m going to talk to Rey, see where we might be able to negotiate with her,” he shot Poe a warning look that he best keep his damn mouth shut. He turned to Leia, “And you can interview the prisoner when I’m done. But for now, the Admiral’s restrictions on visitation are going to stand. Unless you want to try to argue your point with the council, but I doubt you’ll get far.”
Leia gave him a glare that was pure cold fury before taking a step back and turning away. Taking a few deep breaths, she paused, looking over her shoulder at them, “What about Ben?”
His brow furrowed in confusion, what the hell did she mean, what about Ren?
She rolled her eyes, “Does he have these same restrictions?”
He looked over at Poe and found a matching look of uncertainty, and after a moment just shrugged.
There were moments when she felt her resolve falter, curled up alone in her cell, not even contact with the force there to sooth her. But then she’d close her eyes, steadying herself and her resolve. They were desperate, if she held her ground, they would cave. They would have to.
She had to hold on to that belief.
It had been a day, she guessed, since Poe’s visit, judging just by the number of meals that had been delivered to her by a serving droid. They would likely leave her alone for awhile, let her stew in her own anxiety and loneliness in the hopes that she’d come to doubt herself and give in. She was so sure that this would be their tactic, that when the lock rattled she nearly leapt out of the bunk, startled, standing staring at the door with her bound hands in front of her.
She thought she was ready for whoever came through that door, but as he slipped inside, shutting the door behind him before leaning against it looking down at his hands, she realized she was wrong.
“Finn,” it was more breathed out than spoken. And he looked up slowly, not able to hide the emotion in his eyes, Finn never could. The sadness and hurt in them could be read like a book. He had been her first and closest friend, and that pain in his eyes had been caused by her, by her betrayal.
“Rey,” he nodded, speaking almost as softly as she had. “Been awhile.”
She blinked, looking away, “So you’re involved in this too?”
He didn’t answer, the only response was the sound of his footsteps drawing closer. She looked up when he stopped, standing maybe six feet away, “You know we had three rescue attempts… after you were captured. They failed, obviously. Lost a lot of good men though. Lots of good men trying to save you.” Finn looked down at his hands, fidgeting with a ring on one of his fingers, before shrugging, “And I didn’t believe it, for the longest time I held out… hope, I guess… that you were being held against your will. That you hadn’t abandoned everything you had believed in and went willingly with a monster.”
“He’s not a monster,” she took a shaky breath.
Finn looked up, “Really? I take it he was just completely misunderstood by us on Starkiller?”
“Stop it,” she felt her anger starting to rise again. Her voice rose, this time growing accusing, “You were a part of this ?”
He shrugged, almost indifferently, looking down at his hands again, “Acquiring you and Ren was my idea, and my plan.”
The rage that shot through her came without warning, and she lunged at him, lacing her bound hands together and swinging them at his face. He caught her wrists before her strike could land, and held them tight as she tried to jerk them out of grip. Instead of letting go, he pulled her roughly forward, pulling her against him before wrapping his arms tightly around her in a hug. She pulled back, but he held her tight against him until she leaned her head against his chest, bursting into tears.
He tucked his chin against her head, his voice a soft murmur, “I can’t say I’m sorry for doing what I think needs to be done. But I’m sorry that I had to hurt you to do it. I really am, Rey.”
When she finally pushed against him again, he let her go, watching as sat down on the edge of her cell’s bunk, bringing her hands up to swipe at her bleary red eyes as she sniffled.
“Here,” he pulled a key out of his pocket, holding his hand out. She stared at him before it clicked what he wanted, and she extended her arms out for him to undo the shackles binding her wrists together. They fell to the floor with clatter, and she raised a hand up to examine one of the suppression bracelets that were locked around each wrist.
“Don’t try to get them off. We’ll know,” he sat down on the edge of the cell’s tray table.
She said nothing for a moment, spinning the cuff on her wrist, much in the same way that he was now turning his wedding ring on his finger, he realized. Her bloodshot eyes looked up and noticed his hands fidgeting, and her brow furrowed slightly, and she nodded towards him, “How’s Rose?”
“Good,” he dropped his hands, “she’s doing good.”
“How long?” she nodded towards his hands and he looked at the ring.
“Nearly four years,” he shrugged, “it wasn’t much, not enough time to make a party out of it with the war and all.”
They both fell silent, and it seemed to make the air in the room heavier for it. It was a statemate neither of them really wanted to be the one to break, so it lingered far longer than it needed to. Rey, though, was the one who finally spoke, “If you’re here to convince me to help you, I already told Poe my terms.”
“We can’t meet those terms,” he sighed, “Releasing Ren isn't an option, you have to understand that.”
“Leaving my children's father to rot in a cell isn’t an option.” She regarded him with fierce determination, “You want my help? Then my family leaves here together when this is over.”
“That’s not going to be acceptable,” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I can make sure the charges against you are fully dropped. You can be free to come and go as you please, if you want to leave when this is over. I might be able to work out open visitation rights that’ll allow you to visit Ren without restriction…”
“No.” Her voice was curt and dismissive.
“Work with me here, Rey. I want to help you.”
“No, you want me to help you,” she glared at him. “Helping me is a means to that end.”
He bowed his head down, fidgeting his ring again because his hands needed something to do, “I want to help you by getting you to help us.” A sigh escaped him, “This is getting into the realm of things that are unlikely, but I could at least fight for-- house arrest, as long as he’s living with you and remains in provided quarters.” Rey folded her arms and looked away and he leaned forward, exasperated, “Exile on a deserted planet?”
“Apparently when we did that on our own on a deserted moon it wasn’t good enough for any of you?”
“Rey…” he shook his head, but she cut him off before he could continue.
“We need to be able to run if we have to, Finn. Do you think the Resistance are the only ones we were hiding from?” She drew a shuddering breath, “ He’s looking for us, looking for Kylo. And he doesn’t know...”
“Snoke.”
“Let us leave when this is over, Finn. Let us leave and unless the Resistance comes to find me again, they’ll never see any of us.” Her eyes flashed at him coldly, “Because I can promise you I’m content to never see anyone here again.”
That hurt, as loath as he was to admit it. She had been one of his best friends, and he had missed her while she was gone. He tried his best not to let it show it affected him as he stood, “I’ll try, but I can tell you now that they won’t agree to that.”
“They will if they need my help bad enough.”
He shook his head, “We’ll talk again sometime soon, Rey.” She just shrugged at him as he left the cell. The entire way back to his quarters he kept his head down, not acknowledging anyone else passing by. When he was finally alone in his room he sat down at his desk and buried his face into his hands, regretting just about every decision he’d made in the last three months.
When he finally dropped his hands, he finally noticed the red light flashing on his datapad, an indicator that he had a com waiting. Reaching over, his hand wavered above it, afraid there might be more bad news waiting. More losses, more death…
Slowly he brought his hand down and pushed the button, closing his eyes and steeling himself for whatever the message might be.
“Heeeeey!”
His eyes shot open and he sucked in a breath. He hadn’t heard her voice in so long, he grabbed the datapad, pulling it closer as it continued.
“We only have a minute each here to transmit, so I’ll keep it short. I’m fine, all of us are. Things have been running smoothly so far and we’re all okay.” Rose’s voice paused, “I heard about what happened at Kuopra, I’m so sorry. We had a lot of good people stationed there.” An unintelligible voice spoke in the background and when she spoke again, she was far more hurried, “Okay, I’ve got to go. I love you and I miss you. But we’ll see each other soon.”
The message ended and he pushed the heels of his hands against his eyes, taking deep breaths to try to keep his emotions in some sort of control. He missed her more than he could ever say, and worried about her more than he thought he could bear.
Closing his eyes, he reached over and tapped the datapad again and let the message replay again.
Notes:
Okay, I hope I pulled all of that off, there's a lot of emotion going on here, and I hope was able to make it come through.
Please feed me comments. They sustain me and give me energy to continue ;)
Chapter 5
Summary:
Leaning forward, he turned the large ceramic fathier that sat as the centerpiece on the coffee table. It was in full run, no rider, just running free.
“I tell Rose that one day, when this is all over, we’re going to settle down somewhere and I’m going to get her one.” Finn smiled, weakly, almost sadly, as he looked down at the ceramic fathier.
“You’re going to get her… a fathier?” he gave his friend a look. They were big and ridiculously expensive. Most of them were raced until they broke down on places like Cantonica and then were unceremoniously disposed once they weren’t good for that life anymore.
Finn smiled, “She loves them. One day I’ll get her one. Maybe two. Maybe we’ll breed them and raise fathiers.”
“Whatever you say, my man.” He shook his head, pouring himself a little more of the whiskey. “Okay, so Rey…”
“She’s not going to fold. It’s Rey,” Finn looked at him over his glass. “If we want her help, we have to give in on Ren.”
He shook his head vehemently, “Let her sit for alone for a week and we’ll see if she still has the same resolve.” Ren wasn’t on the table. Finn couldn’t really be thinking of actually agreeing on this?
Notes:
Just a quick Merry Christmas, belated happy Hannukah, and happy holidays to all.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“She’s not budging on it.”
He let Finn’s words register before he sank down into the chair facing his friend and conspirator in arms in this entire fucking mess. Finn said nothing, just slid a glass across the coffee table and nudged the bottle of Dodbri whiskey towards the him. It was obvious Finn was already buzzed and probably on his way to drinking himself into oblivion tonight.
After a moment’s hesitation, he picked the bottle up and poured some in his glass. “We’re down to the bottom of your stock, eh?” he asked, turning to look at the label. Dodbri was cheap, vile, and very effective.
“No, no, I my dwindling collection also includes some Oil-Rig Whiskey and some unnamed, unmarked bottles of brown something that was probably made in sketchy places by sketchy people using sketchy processes.” Finn swirled the brown liquid remaining in the bottom of his glass, “Dodbri is practically classy in comparison.”
Knocking back his own glass in one quick shot, he winced and coughed, “That’s terrifying.”
“I’ll let you know when I scrape the bottom so you can sample some of those unmarked masterpieces with me.”
He laughed, looking around the room. It much more tasteful than his own mess if a quarters, probably a lot more tasteful than Finn would have had it on his own. Finn might be more neat and orderly than he was, a holdover from the man’s stormtrooper training he’d guess, but this room was decorated with a woman’s touch.
Leaning forward, he turned the large ceramic fathier that sat as the centerpiece on the coffee table. It was in full run, no rider, just running free.
“I tell Rose that one day, when this is all over, we’re going to settle down somewhere and I’m going to get her one.” Finn smiled, weakly, almost sadly, as he looked down at the ceramic fathier.
“You’re going to get her… a fathier?” he gave his friend a look. They were big and ridiculously expensive. Most of them were raced until they broke down on places like Cantonica and then were unceremoniously disposed once they weren’t good for that life anymore.
Finn smiled, “She loves them. One day I’ll get her one. Maybe two. Maybe we’ll breed them and raise fathiers.”
“Whatever you say, my man.” He shook his head, pouring himself a little more of the whiskey. “Okay, so Rey…”
“She’s not going to fold. It’s Rey,” Finn looked at him over his glass. “If we want her help, we have to give in on Ren.”
He shook his head vehemently, “Let her sit for alone for a week and we’ll see if she still has the same resolve.” Ren wasn’t on the table. Finn couldn’t really be thinking of actually agreeing on this?
“My unsolicited opinion is that it won’t make any difference,” Finn just shrugged his shoulders. “Leia’s right, maybe we have been forgetting who we’re dealing with here. When Rey stands her ground she’s not going to be moved.” He paused, “Unless we push the current schedule, we’re looking at moving on the base in the Aclo system in two weeks.”
His hand tightened around his glass, “We can take Aclo without her, it’s small.”
“We can take the system, it’ll give us breathing room at least.” Finn leaned forward, “But we won’t get in to the computers before they’re wiped, so the goal of gaining the information we need is going into the trash compactor then.”
“We’re not letting Kylo kriffing Ren go, Finn!” He leaned forward, his jaw clenched, “You know what that man did. Fuck, he nearly killed you. He tortured me. He slaughtered Tuanal. That’s enough to deserve a firing squad right there, without even adding Starkiller and Hosnia to the list.”
“This wasn’t about Kylo Ren,” Finn stared down at the remains of his drink, watching the liquid as it swirled in the glass.
He blinked, “What the hell is that supposed to mea---”
“It means Rey was our end goal here. To get her help, even if we had to force her into it.” Finn knocked back his glass, “Getting our fingers on Kylo Ren was a perk and we’re forgetting that fact. If we knew Ren had been living alone outside of the war not causing trouble, would we have gone to the effort of tracking him down and catching him?”
Gritting his teeth, “Maybe not now but---”
“Yeah, eventually. Retribution. But getting retribution wasn’t what we’re after right now. We kill Kylo Ren and lose this war, is that worth it? This was always about Rey and about getting help we think we need. Do we throw that away now because---”
“Justice. This is about justice,” he snapped.
Finn shrugged, “I’d love to see the man dead. Part of me hopes that if he was gone Rey would come to her senses, see that she’d been brainwashed. He kidnapped her and manipulated her. I’ll never believe anything else. But she thinks she loves him.” There was a edge of disgust in his voice, “That’s what I saw in that room. She thinks she loves him.”
“I can’t… we can’t… He knocked back the rest of his glass and dropped it on the table, feeling slightly sick. “This is Kylo Ren, Finn. Even if we want to do this, you think we can convince the council?”
“I don’t know. But I’m remembering what the entire point of this was, of the resources we put in to finding her.” He paused, “In the end, if we let them leave, I think we never see them again, unless we try to find them. It would be different if I thought they might come back, Ren might come back for his revenge, or to grab power, but I don’t think so. Let them go and they’re gone. They’ll vanish into wild space again and find another place to hide from everything.”
“And Ren never pays for his crimes? Really, Finn?” He stood, “Justice is never served?”
“Like I said, is retribution that much more important if it costs us the war?”
For a long time he just stared, Finn shrugged and poured himself another glass of whiskey. Finally he sighed, “I’ll talk to Kelen, if we’re going to convince the council to go with this, we need him on our side.”
“That prick,” Finn muttered, sipping his drink.
“Yeah, he’s a paranoid ass. But then again, if he can be convinced, we got a shot.” He headed to the door, pausing to look back, “When this is all over we’re going to crack a few bottles from the bottom of your collection and see if we survive them.”
His friend laughed, which was good to see. Finn of all people needed to laugh right now. “Sounds like a plan,” Finn raised his glass to say goodbye, and he gave him a small grin and a nod before walking out the door.
In the hallway the grin fell away. Was he really going to do this? Try to convince the council that they needed to let Ren go for this to work?
He sighed, heading towards the command center to find Admiral Kelen.
Despite everything, from the damage she inflicted on him to the wrath and scorn he faced from Snoke at him being bested by a girl who had never even held a lightsaber, he had found himself unable to get the girl out of his head. It didn’t help that he had a visual reminder of her every time he had looked into a mirror and saw the marks she’d left on him. But in the end, it had been her eyes that haunted him whenever he closed his eyes. Those eyes, full of scorn and rage, blazing at him with such fury as she called him a monster.
As time passed, he’d come close to cornering her a few times during brief battles between the Resistance and the First Order. His orders were clear, she was to be captured alive and delivered before Snoke. What Snoke wanted with her now wasn’t clear. Skywalker was back. The girl was no longer the key to anything.
There was a growing dread that it had more to do with him than with the girl. That Snoke sensed that his feelings towards the her were somehow almost affectionate. His lack of anger at the garbage picker that spat names at him, defeated him during the interrogation, and left him burned and battered on the snow, was a puzzle he didn’t quite understand. If Snoke was aware of his lack of antagonism towards her, he was sure his master would be very disapproving.
Once, he had her cornered, only to have Skywalker come to her aid. It had been the first time he saw his uncle and he’d allowed himself to get distracted. Which had been Skywalker’s intent, he was sure. And in the end they both were able to escape, jumping on to the ramp of a transport mid-air. As they left the girl’s eyes had fixed on his visor, that anger he remembered still blazing from them, seeming to light them almost from within.
Batuu had been an opportunity. She had been alone and her team of rebel scum was small. Still, she hadn’t gone down without a fight. Scrapping till the bitter end, even as the drug she’d been given sapped her strength away. Standing in from of the mirror a week later, bare chested, he found himself staring at the healing bruise on the center of his chest. The last blow she’d landed on him as he cradled her in his arms. She’d gathered every last drop of strength and balled her fist to hammer him one last time before finally succumbing to the sedative. It had hurt, but all he could do was laugh. She was fighter, such a fighter.
He had thought it was done, finally done. Once she was secured in the brig he had distanced himself, despite the strange feelings that seemed to pull him towards her, make him want to know more about her. It wasn’t hard for him to understand these feelings were dangerous, that she was dangerous to him. So he stepped back and left her to Hux and his men.
The first bad news had come when he found they were unable to go straight back to Snoke. There was rebel activity and the Finalizer was needed for the next few weeks to remain in the rim. His first impulse was that he should take a smaller ship and take her himself, but the rebels were looking for her, looking to stage a rescue, and Hux had pointed out that she was the most secure remaining on the Star Destroyer.
The second bad news came as he was staring at the bruise and a com had come in. The girl wasn’t eating or drinking, which was how they had been attempting to deliver her the force suppressants and the mild sedative to keep her passive. The idiots had let it go too long, and when they finally sent in the a medical droid instead, the original suppressant had worn off enough that she’d been able to break free of the restraints and destroy it.
His help was requested to keep her restrained and under control while the drugs were delivered and she was rehydrated.
That was the start of his downfall, that he hadn’t been able to just avoid her.
The chains had been removed, but in their place were a pair of cuffs that could administer an electric shock that probably would have brought down a bantha. It was more than enough to short circuit all his muscles and leave him convulsing on the floor. He knew that for certain, because one of the assholes who put them on him decided he needed an example of what they could do and activated them with a smirk on his face.
There was a line marking off a third of the cell, and a light above the door that told him he had five seconds or so to make sure he was on the other side of that line before he got his ass fried again. A way to allow “visitors” to safely be in the room with him, and for his meals to be delivered and left on the table by the door.
Laying on the bed, he ran his finger along the suppression collar. A suppression collar, a suppression bracelet on each wrist, and the stun cuffs. If he was going to get out of here, he needed to find a way to overcome these things. Or work around them. Something, anything. He would tear people limb from limb until he got his children and Rey back.
He had no idea how he was going to do it, but somehow… somehow…
The light above the door began to flash. He was safely across the room already, so he just sat awkwardly on the low bunk, folding himself as best he could to fit. Glaring coldly to see what was he was going to have to face now. Whatever it was, he was ready for it.
Then she walked through the door, and he realized he was not ready for this at all.
“Hello, Ben,” she said as she leaned against the wall next to the door.
“General Organa,” he sneered. “So was this your doing?” Of course it was, this was her revenge for… for what he had done. Perhaps to get the children too, get them away from him, with him being the monster he was.
“No.”
He blinked, “What?”
“It’s not my doing. I tried to stop this,” she folded her arms. “If it was my choice we would have left you and Rey alone. You both made your choice to run, clearly you weren’t a part of this anymore, on either side.”
His brow furrowed, this wasn’t what he was expecting to hear. “Why should I believe you?” he glared at her suspiciously. “You have every reason to want me here, to want me to face a firing squad.”
“I’ve never wanted that. Your father didn’t either. He wanted to save you, we both did.”
“ Save me, ” he muttered, contemptfully.
“Yes, Han tried and failed,” he looked away from her as she spoke, there was pain and sadness in her eyes and he didn’t want to have to see that, couldn’t face that. “But Rey, she somehow pulled it off.”
He swallowed back his protest. There was no saving him, there never had been and never would be. Whatever good Rey had brought to the surface just covered that darkness that still existed at the his core. But hearing Rey’s name tore at his heart, and staring down at his hands he had to ask, “Is she alright?” There was a hint of pleading desperation in his voice, making his own voice seem so alien to him.
“I haven’t seen her yet. She’s physically unharmed, but I’m sure she’s not in the best state right now,” his mother pursed her lips. “The children…”
His head jerked up, anger and fear beginning to leech throughout his entire being, “Where are they?”
“They’re in my care.”
“You’re care,” he spat the words out, his rage growing. She had no right to his children, not after everything. Clenching and unclenching his fists, he looked down again, blood rushing into his ears. She had no right...
“They’re terrified.”
His eyes shot up, a storm of emotions hitting him and dampening the fury with an emotion he couldn’t describe. They needed him. His babies needed him and he couldn’t do anything to help them.
“They’re barely talking, I don’t even know their names,” she said, softly, almost pleadingly.
For a minute, a battle raged within him, part of him wanting nothing more than to deny her any information she wanted. The other part of him needed to do whatever he could right now that might help his children.
He swallowed, blinking back the wetness in his eyes, “Solan and Skye.”
She nodded, repeating the names quietly to herself, and to his surprise walked towards him, crossing the line dividing the room. He was sure someone was monitoring, but if he wanted he could move quick enough to do damage before they knocked him out. And she would know that… he blinked at her as she walked up in front of him and crouched down. “I only want to help them Ben. Please, will you help me help them?”
“I’ll kill to protect them,” he breathed the words through gritted teeth.
To his surprise, she just nodded, “I know. Trust me, I know.”
He blinked, his gaze softening. Drawing in a shuddering breath he nodded once, waiting to hear what she actually wanted from him.
“Good,” her voice was so soft he barely heard it. She stood up, turning to look up at the holocam mounted in the corner of the room, there to better monitor his every move. He frowned as she nodded her head sharply at the camera. Tensing in apprehension as the door rattled and opened.
“DADDY!” Skye’s voice shrieked and his eyes widened as the two came through the door. He fell to his knees in front of the bunk and as they slammed into him he enveloped them both, dragging them tight against him, part of him hardly believing they were actually here. They both burrowed their faces against his chest and he kissed the tops of their heads.
His babies. His babies were okay. Tears ran down his face and he looked up over their heads to where Leia had retreated across the room, leaning on the wall with her arms folded over her chest as she observed them.
Looking at her eyes he realized there were tears in hers too.
“The strangers, they hurt you,” the boy, Solan, her grandson’s name was Solan, said softly to his father, staring at him with wide eyes.
Ben reached out and cupped his hands around the boy’s face, nodding, “I know, but I’m fine now.”
“Where’s mom?” Skye, the girl, asked, her voice muffled since her face was still burrowed into her father’s chest.
“She’s here and she’s okay too. We’re both fine,” his voice shook slightly. Ben nuzzled his face against the girl’s black hair.
It was startling, the change in his behavior from only a few minutes ago. His emotions were grounded in a way they hadn’t been before. The fear and anger were still there, but the erratic storm had calmed, and he was in control of himself and doing his best to keep himself level in front of the kids.
“I want to go home, when can we go home?” Solan pleaded.
She winced as Ben looked over the boy’s head at her, a flash of anger and accusation in them for a moment. Then it was gone and he drew a shaky breath, pulling back slightly from both kids so he could look at both of them. “I don’t know,” the kids’ faces both dropped and he shook his head, “we…” he paused, trying to steady himself, “we might not ever go back… but…” he gave Skye a steady look as her brow furrowed, clearly upset, “wherever we are, when we’re all together, you two and your mom and me, that’s when we’re always be home, no matter where we are. And we will be together again, I promise you that.”
He looked up again, meeting her eyes, appearing to wage an inner war for a minute before gently turned both kids to face her. “Skye, Solan, I want you to meet your grandmother,” her heart leap into her throat, and the twins looked at each other in confusion, then glanced back at their father. Ben nodded, “Yes, grandmother. This is my mother, Leia.” She blinked, her eyes stinging, as Ben continued, “She’s going to be looking after you for a little while.”
Both kids turned sharply back to their father, Solan’s eyes widening and filling with tears, Skye’s face tensing as she threw herself around her father’s neck again, “No! I want to stay with you why can’t we stay with you?”
Ben closed his eyes tight, “Skye, shhhh…” he stroked her hair, “You can’t stay with me, not right now.”
Solan burst into tears, “I want to be with you and Mom, I want to go home, why can’t we go home?”
“Sol,” Ben put his hand on the boy’s shoulder, “Look at me, Sol.”
The boy shook his head, reaching near hysterics, “ I don’t want to be here anymore I want to go home !”
Without warning the cell’s security holocam mounted in the corner of the room exploded, raining a shower of sparks and causing all four of them to jump. Skye let out a little shriek of alarm and Ben stared at the destroyed camera, a look of horror on his face. Solan stared at the bit of destruction, his mouth hanging open, fear and guilt in his eyes. She realized he was aware that he had been the one to destroy it, even if he didn’t entirely understand how.
There were sounds of footsteps running down the hallway, and as the door started to open she grabbed it, standing in the opening and glaring at the guards, “It’s fine, don’t even think about coming in here…” The very last thing she needed was security bursting in and traumatizing the kids even more.
The two security officers looked at each other in confusion, “General, the camera---”
“I’m aware. Wait out here.” She shut the door and turned to see Ben talking intently to both kids.
“...Okay?” Whatever he had been saying had settled them slightly, though neither was happy, staring at their father with somber expressions. “Right now, the two of you need to be brave for each other. I’m counting on you to look out for one another. Understood?”
They nodded, almost mournfully, and he continued, “We’ll see each other again soon, but until then you will be good for your grandmother.” They turned, looking at her in a way that was not entirely trusting, before looking back to their father and nodding again.
“Good,” he pulled both of them into another bear hug, kissing each of them before pulling back, “I need to talk to your grandmother in private…”
She nodded, yes, they really needed to talk about what just happened. “It’ll only be a few minutes.You’re going to wait outside for me and then we’ll go get something to eat.”
There were a few more minutes of clinginess, neither child wanted to leave their father. Once they were safely out of the room, she turned towards Ben, eyes intent as she glanced at the destroyed camera, “Has this happened before?”
He stood, looking down at her, “No…” he hesitated, frowning, not certain with his answer, “ maybe once. Rey mentioned something with a vase.”
“The girl destroyed a table yesterday. Scared herself half to death in the process.”
Ben shook his head, exasperated, “They’re five … this is...” He took a step towards her, eyes flashing, “They’re not safe here. You have to know that. Especially if they’re having an awakening at five kriffing years old.”
“Does he know about them?”
He took a step towards her, eyes flashing, “ No one knew about them. I made sure of that. It’s probably too late to keep it that way thanks to this .”
“I promise I’ll keep them safe, Ben.”
She wasn’t ready for the look of contempt and accusation on his face as he turned and sat on the bunk again. You didn’t protect me, that look seemed to say, why should I trust you to protect them? It cut her worse than a blade ever could. Cut straight to her soul.
Because he was right. If she hadn’t been able to protect Ben from Snoke, how could she expect to protect her grandchildren if the monster decided to target them?
Neither one of them said another word. Looking down she turned and left, feeling his eyes burning into her as she walked out.
“Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“Probably,” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Kelen’s reaction was about as receptive as he expected the man to be. “But Finn’s got a point. The point of this operation wasn’t to bring Kylo Ren to justice. It was about getting the help we needed.”
“Yeah, you know what I thought about that part of the plan to begin with, Poe,” Kelen’s green eyes bore into him, a near snarl on his face. Athan Kelen was surly, paranoid, miserable son of a bitch, always had been. He didn’t trust anyone, especially ‘those damn jedi,’ Skywalker included. He’d supported their push for the operation pretty much solely because of the opportunity to bring Ren down.
“I don’t think that was the opinion of the rest of the council, Athan,” he sighed. “Our goal was to Rey to help us, Ren was just the bait to do that. And if she won’t give in---”
“Then kriff the little bitch, give her a front row seat to the bastard’s execution.”
He gritted his teeth, “She was my friend once, you know. I’m not in this to hurt her.”
Kelen shrugged, indifferently, “Good thing some of the rest of us don’t have that kind of baggage.”
“Athan,” there was a touch of pleading to his tone. “We move on Aclo in two weeks. We can brute force it without her, but then they’ll have time to destroy everything on that base’s computers before it falls.” He leaned forward, ”Or we can do a two stage assault, precision team breaches the control room, secures it. Then we bring the second front in and crush the rest of them. If you want the information dump we can get, we need Rey on our team for the plan to work. And right now the only way she’s going to agree to that is if we agree to let them go once we’re done dealing with whatever it is that the First Order is building.”
Leaning back, Kelen scrutinized him for a moment, “You’re a good man and an honest man, Poe.”
He frowned, not sure where this came from or where Kelen was going with it, “Uh, thank---”
“And that’s your fucking problem.” He blinked in confusion and Kelen snorted. “See, a man without scruples would have figured out the best way to deal with this, if you’re so hell bent that we need that damn jedi to help us.” Kelen’s eyes squinted as he gave an unkind smirk, “You make the deal and renege on it later.”
“No… the council won’t go along with lying…”
“I got at least seven people on the council who will be more than happy to play along with this and change their minds once we get what we want.” Kelen shrugged, “More than enough that we don’t even need you to join in if your too honorable to play dirty. Seven out of twelve, we change our minds and Ren can get the firing squad. You can decide what you want to do with Rey, probation will work as long as she’s required to be suppressed whatever you want. I don’t care, frankly, as long as she can’t do damage.”
His stomach roiled, “I… I can’t do this to her… And Finn won’t go along with this… Leia---”
“Tico doesn’t have to know how this will play out. Organa’s already got no say in any of this, you and Tico did a good job at making sure of that,” Kelen smirked approvingly. “I’ll call a meeting tomorrow. Really Poe, all you need to do is keep your mouth shut and let me take care of the rest.”
“This isn’t right, Athan…” he stood, regretting the whiskey he’d had with Finn earlier. His stomach was a churning mess and he wasn’t entirely sure he wasn’t about to be sick on Kelen’s desk.
“Neither is letting Ren walk,” Kelen snorted, standing and sorting through a few folders of flimsi on his desk. “War’s a bitch, our choices aren’t always black or white.”
He shook his head, getting to his feet, Kelen glanced up, “Just keep your mouth shut, Poe. That’s all I’m asking you to do.”
Putting his head down and hurried out of Kelen’s office.
It is time, I have seen it… you will return to me...
He sat up suddenly on the bunk, heart jumping into his chest at the sinister whisper that crept through his mind. Panic seized him and he did his best to secure his mind. Suppressed, he wouldn’t be able to hide or force him out, but he could lock down what he would see.
The mighty Kylo Ren, at the mercy of the rebel scum… yes, I know where you are, boy. Now you see what your weakness has wrought. How you let your emotion for that little bitch bring you to this.
Closing his eyes he focused on his mental walls… keeping them secure, keeping the important things hidden.
You are hiding something from me… not the girl… No, something else…
Snoke pressed, but he couldn’t break through, not at this distance, at least. The whisper hissed angrily through his head. I will know your secrets in time. All of them.
My fallen apprentice, it is not necessarily too late. You and the girl, stand before me, and I may yet show mercy for your failure and betrayal. Wait, watch, and strike when the opportunity arises. Then return to me, and I will once again show you the way to be strong again.
He felt the presence fading, In the end you will give me everything.
Notes:
A few thoughts and notes---
This fic was started before I saw TLJ, and while I'm incorporating bits of TLJ now in here, it's very much an AU and divergent timeline from canon for anything post TFA.
Kelen is the first time I recycled an OC. I first created him in Chained, although he's a bit more of an asshole in this one than he was in that story.
A little clarification since I've not fully explained it all in the story, though I've hinted at aspects of it--
The council is a pseudo governing body made up of the top ranking Resistance. There are thirteen members, seven generals and six admirals. Leia was basically removed from having her vote or argument on anything to do with Kylo or Rey do to conflict of interest since Kylo is her son, a maneuver that was orchestrated by Poe and Finn. Hence Kelen mentioning that he can get seven of the twelve willing to make a deal and then vote to renege on it later.Ugh, Snoke. It was just a matter of time before we had to have his slimy presence make a return. No, he doesn't know about the kids, yet
If you feel like punching Poe, don't feel bad. I'm the frickin' writer and I want to deck him at the moment. Personally I feel a little more for Finn, because at least he has the decency to feel some guilt over it.
Thank you all for all the comments and I'm so happy people are liking this story :)
Please continue to feed me comments and validate my existence ;)
Chapter 6
Summary:
She practically threw herself across the room and into his arms, slamming her mouth into his in an almost desperate kiss. The last week, not knowing for sure when or if she might see him again, all the fear and frustration funneling into passion that was returned back to her by him as he heaved her up into air. For a moment, just a moment, everything else faded and there was just her and him, embracing as it had always been meant to be.
Finn cleared his throat, bringing her back to reality. She glanced over her shoulder at where he was leaning on the wall, a look of disgust in his eyes as he played with his ring, avoiding looking at them by staring at that instead.
Under her arms and legs, Kylo trembled, and she looked back at him to see him shaking in rage as he glared at Finn. She put a hand on his cheek, drawing his attention back to her. His face softened and he let out a long breath as he looked into her eyes.
Yeah, Finn wasn’t comfortable with this display of affection? Well fuck you Finn, she kissed Kylo again, ignoring the muttering she heard from across the room.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It was hard not to be reminded of the last time she’d been in a cell. Those days that had stretched to weeks locked away on the Finalizer. At first completely alone, not even a stormtrooper standing guard, meals and water were delivered by droid. No one came to interrogate her, no one came to tell her what was going to happen to her. There was nothing, nothing at all, it had been the most agonizing thing, not knowing what was coming next.
She figured out the water was drugged quickly. Her connection with the force was still affected by the drugs she’d been given when she was captured, but she was beginning to at least be able to feel it again. That had ended abruptly after she drank the ration of water included with her meal, her feeling of it fading rapidly and she had become drowsy and calm.
At that point she refused all the rations delivered to her cell by the service droid.
Dehydration was weakening her, but she felt the force returning. There would be no chance of escape if she didn’t have the force to aid her. They caught on, although too late, and set in a med droid to deliver the drugs she’d been avoiding. She left the thing smashed to bits on the floor of her cell. It had been a short lived victory, soon another med droid came, and this time it had help.
While her skills had increased greatly over the nearly two years she had been under Luke’s erratic tutelage. But she was still barely trained and unfocused compared to Ren’s power. He locked her in a force hold, that damn mask watching her the whole time as the droid delivered the drugs and rehydrated her. Once it was done, and the droid safely out of the cell, the hold on her body released, and she had stumbled backwards, sitting down hard on the metal shelf that served as a bed.
Ren’s head had tilted, down towards her ration, sitting on floor on its tray, exactly where the service droid had left it, then back to look at her,“You’re hungry.”
She had narrowed her eyes at him, saying nothing.
“Your efforts are futile, you must see that,” the modulated voice sounded annoyed, perhaps just her imagination trying to add the emotions she expected. She glared at him, futile or not, she would not willingly drug herself. “Your stubbornness will be your downfall.”
“Why am I here? What do you want with me?”
That head tilt again, “You’re here to be kept secured until you can be brought before the Supreme Leader.”
“What does Snoke want with me?”
He ignored her question, “The med droids will feed you if necessary. The process is far from comfortable. I suggest you make this easy on yourself.”
Three more days refusing her food or water, and Ren had returned with the med droid and repeated the process of drugging and rehydrating her. But rather than releasing her from his force hold, he’d opened the cell and walked in. Her eyes had widened in surprise and fear, not sure what his intent was, but unable to move away as he crouched in front of her. “Enough of this, you will eat the food delivered to you.”
She just glared at him and she actually could hear the huff of frustration, rumbling like static through the mask’s vocoder, before he reached up and released his mask, wrenching it off as fast it unlocked and dropping to next to him on the floor. Her breath caught at the sight of his face, her first look at the scar she had left on him from their battle on Starkiller, and then hitched completely as she met his eyes. Those dark embers burned intensely into her own.
“I suggest,” his voice was quiet, almost soft, “that you rethink this contrariness that you wrap around yourself so proudly. I may tolerate it…” his eyes flicked away from hers for just a second, and she thought she saw, something like admiration in them for a brief moment, “but the Supreme Leader will not.”
“I don’t care what your supreme leader tolerates,” she spat.
“By the time he’s done with you, you will,” there was the slightest tremor in his voice, an emotion there she couldn’t quite place, a flash of something like concern or regret in his eyes as he reached up and cupped her chin with a gloved hand, “Submit and you may yet be allowed to survive.”
There was something strangely reverent about the way he cupped her face, eyes boring into her. She found her eyes drifting down the scar, then settling on his lips, before she slammed her eyes shut, trying to clear her mind before she spoke, “I would rather die than bow before either of you.”
Ren looked away, another aggravated huff leaving him as he stood, grabbing his helmet as he did so, “You’re a fool.”
“Better a fool than a monster.”
His eye darted to her and they looked… hurt. Not angry, hurt. That reaction hadn’t been what she expected, and she blinked at him as he turned, leaving her cell, not looking back as the bars slid shut, locking her in as he walked away.
It wasn’t till he was out of sight that his force hold on her had finally released.
The food was strange, he pushed it around his plate, not wanting to eat it. Skye didn’t seem to mind it quite as much, she’d eaten maybe half of what had been given to her, though he sensed she was pretty indifferent to it.
“You need to eat your food, Solan,” the woman--- the one his dad had said was his grandmother--- said, watching him with concern. He didn’t quite understand it. Dad had said she was his mom, and that didn’t seem to make much sense at all.
“I don’t like it,” he frowned down at his plate.
“You didn’t eat much at lunch either. You have to eat at least some of it.”
He didn’t answer, just shoved the contents more forcefully with his fork. She sighed, “How about we compromise and you take three more bites? If you do that you can leave the table if you want.”
Glaring at the contents of his plate, he shook his head, “I’m not hungry.”
“Solan,” her voice was stern, but behind it he could feel concern ebbing in waves. She was worried. About him. It reminded him of when his mom fretted over him.
Pouting, he took a small amount on his fork and shoved it in his mouth, crinkling his nose at the strange texture.
Someone knocked at the door and he looked up as Leia got up and walked over, opening the door to where another stranger stood in the hallway. She folded her arms, glaring at the man, “What do you want?”
The man’s eyes darted past her to the children, apprehensively. He caught a brief spike of anxiety from him, then it was tamped down, “There was a council meeting---”
“There was? Good to know I was invited,” Leia snapped. Angry. He could feel the anger coming off of her in waves.
“They’ve agreed to Rey’s demands,” the man practically mumbled. He and Skye both looked up at the name. Mom’s name was Rey. They both knew that.
Leia straightened slightly, breathing out as relief washed over her,“So after…”
“Yeah,” the man darted his eyes away and he found himself staring, brow furrowed, the man was lying about something and wasn’t comfortable at all. “If we succeed in destroying the threat they’ll be allowed to leave.” The man paused, “Finn’s going to talk to Rey.”
“Good,” Leia’s voice was quiet, and she glanced over her shoulder at him and Skye, “Why don’t you come in and meet my grandchildren, Poe?”
The man---Poe--- widened his eyes, “Ah, no, I really need to be goin---”
Leia leveled a glare at Poe, stepping aside to give him access through the doorway, and he snapped his mouth shut, raising his hands palms out, “Alright, alright…” His anxiety spiked as he walked into the room.
“Skye, Solan, this is an old friend of your mother, Poe.”
He furrowed his brow in confusion, glancing over and Skye to find her glancing back at him puzzled. Poe shifted uncomfortably, “Um… yeah, hi…”
“You know mom?” he asked slightly suspiciously. He didn’t think he liked this man. Neither did Skye, judging from the narrow eyed glare she was giving this Poe.
“I… did. A long time ago,” the man glanced over at Leia, almost pleadingly.
“Can we see her soon? I miss her, I miss my Mom,” Skye blurted out suddenly.
“Real soon,” Poe held his hands out, appeasingly, “I promise.” He took a step back towards the door, “I have to go but it was… um… nice… to meet both of you.”
Skye frowned, glaring at the man as he moved away.
Leia shot him a sideways glance as he backed towards the door. “Finn or I will let you know once everything is cleared up…”
“Fine,” she said, icily as he turned and left in a hurry. Leia shut the door as he left, glaring at it a moment with her arms folded across her chest.
“Don’t trust him,” Skye mumbled to him, quiet enough that only he could here. He nodded in agreement, he hadn’t trusted that man at all.
“We’re agreeing to your terms.”
She blinked up at Finn, almost startled, “When this is over we all get to leave?”
“Yes,” Finn pulled one of the metal chairs over to sit across from her bunk. “Even Ren. Once we identify this new threat and neutralize it.”
For a long moment she studied Finn’s face, but there was no sign of deceit in his expression. If there was one thing that she could count on it was Finn’s utter inability to keep a secret from his face. He just couldn’t tell a lie without it screaming from his eyes.
“Okay…” she stood, “Then I want to see Kylo and I want to see my kids. Now.”
He nodded, standing, “You’ll be allowed to stay with the children while on base.”
Allowed. Allowed to stay with her children. That word alone drew her hackles up and she had to fight to stay calm. Her goal now was to get through this and get to the point where they’d be allowed to go free.
Finn opened the door and she followed behind him, down a durasteel hallway lined with doors. More cells. The architecture was ugly, institutional. Her eyes narrowed, not keeping contempt from her voice, “When did the the Resistance start maintaining prisons?”
“When we moved into one as a base,” Finn shot her a look over his shoulder, and she could see that the implication of her question had hurt him. “Old empire facility, tech is old but the shields still keep this place secure, even a First Order dreadnaught can’t blast through them. We’ve repurposed and reconfigured most of the cell blocks, but we’ve kept this high security row for rare cases when we do have prisoners.” He stopped in front of a door and punched a button next to it, causing a light to start flashing. A few seconds later the locks released, and he pushed the door open.
Kylo stood on the opposite end of the cell, tense, fists clenched, clearly trying to prepare himself for whatever unknown might be about to come in. Then he saw her and his breath caught, hands opening, “Rey…”
She practically threw herself across the room and into his arms, slamming her mouth into his in an almost desperate kiss. The last week, not knowing for sure when or if she might see him again, all the fear and frustration funneling into passion that was returned back to her by him as he heaved her up into air. For a moment, just a moment, everything else faded and there was just her and him, embracing as it had always been meant to be.
Finn cleared his throat, bringing her back to reality. She glanced over her shoulder at where he was leaning on the wall, a look of disgust in his eyes as he played with his ring, avoiding looking at them by staring at that instead.
Under her arms and legs, Kylo trembled, and she looked back at him to see him shaking in rage as he glared at Finn. She put a hand on his cheek, drawing his attention back to her. His face softened and he let out a long breath as he looked into her eyes.
Yeah, Finn wasn’t comfortable with this display of affection? Well fuck you Finn, she kissed Kylo again, ignoring the muttering she heard from across the room.
When she broke away this time, Kylo set her back down on her feet, the two of them staring into each other’s eyes.
“I---I saw Skye and Solan,” he breathed, voice so soft she could barely hear it.
She nodded, “They’re okay?”
“Scared and confused, but okay.”
Raking her fingers through his hair, she looked away from his eyes, knowing he wasn’t going to like what she was about to say, “I made a deal…”
He stiffened, “Rey…”
“I help them---”
“No---”
“---and when it’s over we leave together…”
“Don’t you dare---” he shook under her hands.
“I have to do this, Kylo… for us.”
“---put yourself in danger for them . Don’t you fucking dare!” His voice lowered to a dangerous growl, “You can’t fucking trust any of them.”
“I’m doing this for us, not them.” She put her hands on his cheeks, cupping his face.
“No… not alone…” he looked up frantically at Finn, “Let me help, let me help her, whatever the fuck you’re about to throw her into, I need to be there…”
Finn stared, shocked, before letting out a single laugh, “You’re out of your mind.”
“Kylo---”
He snarled viciously at Finn, and she squeezed his face between her hands, “Kylo you need to be here for the kids. If anything happens to me…” she swallowed, nervously, what if something did happen to her? They hadn’t discussed that, she turned to look at Finn, “If something happens to me you’ll be allowed to leave with the kids…”
Finn raised his eyebrows, “I---,” he paused, then nodded slowly, “we’ll discuss that later.”
Kylo’s eyes narrowed, she drew his attention back to her, “I need you to be strong, Ky. Please. For me, for them.”
His lips trembled, his voice so soft she could barely hear it, “I can’t live without you. Rey, I can’t…”
She kissed him again, “For them you can. But I have no intention of letting anything happen to me. We’ll all be leaving here together when this is over.” Burying her face into his neck, she spoke into his ear, “I promise, we’re all leaving here together.”
Once they left Ren’s cell, Finn lead her down a maze of corridors in silence.
“What about these?” she held up her wrists to show the suppression bracelets.
Finn glanced over his shoulder to see what she was asking about, then quickly turned away, “When you’re off base heading towards a mission, we’ll remove them and the collar. They’ll be put back on when you return.”
“Great, good to know all of the trust is mutual,” she snarled, sarcastically.
“Yeah, well, sorry about that,” he didn’t bother turning around, “but we’re not about to take that risk.”
She glared down at her wrists before looking up again, “If something happens to me---”
He stiffened, “We’ll discuss this later.”
“If I fucking die trying to help you, he gets to go with the kids.”
“That’s…” Finn stopped, turning, “It’s not going to be my call.”
“Well talk to whoever’s call it’s going to be and make it happen,” she clenched her fists, stepping forward.
“Those kids,” there was a slight edge of contempt in his voice, “you’re more than happy to leave them with that monster?”
That monster? “That monster is their father. A good father. And I’d say I’m sorry you don’t approve but frankly I don’t give a fuck.”
“What did he do to you?” Anger flashed in Finn’s eyes. “What did he do to make you think you love him?”
Her hand cracked across Finn’s cheek before she could stop herself. He stood, frozen, startled more than angry.
She took a breath, stepping forward, “I don’t think I love him. I love him. That’s it. And what did he do? He saved me, that’s what he did, Finn. He sacrificed everything and ran with me.”
Finn rolled his eyes as he turned, stalking forward as she followed behind him, until he paused at another door, knocking. It opened, slightly…
Leia.
She didn’t look that much more different than the last time she’d seen her. Her eyes softened when they saw her, and she threw the door the fully open.
“MOMMMMMM!”
The shriek barely had time to register before she stumbled back as Sol and Skye threw themselves into her. Not that she minded, no, she didn’t mind at all as she sat down hard on the floor and pulled them both with her, hugging them tightly against her and kissing them.
“I missed you,” she wasn’t just crying, she was sobbing. “Oh babies I missed you so much.”
“I’ll see if I can get you a bigger quarters, or another bed at least.”
She looked up at Leia. They were sitting at the table, Skye and Sol showing her the pieces of flimsi with the drawings on them. Sol was on her lap, Skye seated next to them. She never wanted to let them go again. But before he left, Finn told her Poe would be coming tomorrow to bring her to a briefing on their current objectives, and she loathed the thought of even having to leave them for that.
“It’s fine, just a bed, whatever,” she snuggled Sol before looking up, serious. “Leia, please tell me none of this was your doing, please .” As painful as it was to accept the other’s part in all of this, Finn and Poe and Jess, people who she used to view as friends, the thought of Leia orchestrating any of this was far far worse. She’d loved the woman as a mentor, a guide, as a mother in a way.
“I tried to stop this, I swear, Rey,” Leia reached across the table and squeezed her hand before letting it go and sighing. “I was blindsided and out maneuvered. Poe learned everything he knew from me, and I taught him a little too well on how to navigate the politics of command.” There was a pause and Leia continued, “And… the… assassin---” her words trailed off as she looked at the kids. “And what happened on Acisea IV--- I was furious. It was a tangled mess trying to sort out who gave the orders. I’m so sorry… for all of it, Rey.”
She nodded, blinking back tears at that. Perhaps it didn’t matter much, in the end, but hearing an apology at least soothed the hurt, just a little. Skye looked up at her and leaned over to hug her, “Why are you crying, Mom?” Her hazel eyes looked up at her intensely, concerned.
“It’s nothing,” she kissed her daughter on top of her head, “I’m just happy to be with you guys again.”
Leia sighed, standing up, “I should go… but if you need anything, or what help with anything, don’t hesitate to ask me…”
She nodded, watching Leia as she made her way to the door.
“Leia?” her voice was soft she wasn’t sure if the woman would even hear her. But Leia did, stopping at the door and turning to look back. She smiled, gently, “I’m glad you’ve been able to meet them…”
A sad smile spread across Leia’s face, her voice quiet, “So am I.”
Where are you…
In his dream he whimpered, the whispering voice rattling through the void, filling the nothingness.
I feel you, feel you both. Two awakenings at once, strong awakenings. The force reverberates with this new power. It can not be a coincidence.
He shivered, backing up, eyes wide in the void. It was empty, nothing, but he wasn’t alone, there was that at least.
“Solan?”
“Skye?
She was afraid, he could feel her fear. “I--- I can’t see you.”
“I can’t see you either,” he wanted to cry, but could you cry if you didn’t have a body? There was nothing here, somehow not even himself. “But I know you’re there.”
Young, very young. Both of you… hmmmmm...
He concentrated on reaching out, and felt his sister’s presence. He tried to hug it, not knowing if he could, but needing to. It was different than a hug, it was as if his entire being tangled with hers for a moment, giving them both strength and comfort.
“This is a dream,” she whispered.
Show yourselves to me, children. Show me who you are. Show me where you are.
Skye’s presence twined around his own, hugging him back, in a way at least.
The voice was like a monster in the stories Mom read them at night. A troll under the bridge, trying to lure them over so it could eat them. Except in those stories the monster was always lost. The children always outsmarted it, or someone came to their rescue.
He didn’t think this was a monster they could destroy.
Suddenly, he felt dark tendrils lick around him, pulling him away from Skye, he let out a scream of horror.
Yes, yes. You now, your mind is much more open the other. The light never can hide. Show yourself to me, child. I can show you so many things.
Skye was fading, he was being pulled, through the nothingness, being pulled towards something cold and dark.
“SOLAN!” Skye cried, and he felt her wrap around him, her presence tangling with his own as she pulled back. Fighting against the dark tendrils trying to drag him away.
“This is a dream,” she sounded near hysterical as she struggled to keep him from being dragged away. “This is a dream and we need to wake up we need to wake up Solan wake up! Wake up!”
“Wake up! Sol, Skye! Wake up!”
She sat up with a gasp, tears in her eyes. Something, something had Solan, she had been trying to hold him but it was stronger, so much stronger. Blinking, she stared into her mother’s face staring down at her in concern.
Instinctively, she reached next to her to grab her brother’s hand, afraid for a split second that she would reach for him and he’d be gone, the thing from the dream had dragged him away. But then her hand found his and she snatched it, his fingers threading with her own as he squeezed her hand back. She looked over at him to see he was awake, wide eyed, he sat up, squeezing her hand tightly. They were in bed together. Mom had pushed the beds the room had together to form one that they could all just barely fit in. Not that she minded snuggling with Mom now that she had her back. She never wanted her mommy to leave her again.
Especially after that nightmare.
“You guys were having a nightmare,” Mom looked worried, she reached down and brushed the sweaty tendrils of hair from her forehead. “Both of you…” Her voice trailed off. It wasn’t the first time that she and Sol had shared a dream or a nightmare, though this may have been the most terrifying nightmare she’d ever had. “You’re okay now, okay?”
She nodded, Solan nodded next to her as well. It had been a dream, they were safe with Mom. It was okay.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
No… she shook her head, glancing at Solan to see if he agreed that they didn’t want to talk about it. Mom was worried enough, she didn’t need to know about this. And she didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t even want to think about it.
Sol squeezed her hand, shaking his head as well. He met her eyes and she knew he felt the same as she did. He didn’t want to talk about it.
Mom frowned, then nodded, “Okay, why don’t you try to go back to sleep.” She smiled, leaning down and kissing each of them, “I’ll stay up and protect you from bad dreams.”
“I love you, Mommy,” she said, laying back down. Sol followed suit, laying next to her.
“I love you, both of you, more than anything,” Mom replied laying on her side next to them.
It didn’t take long to fall back asleep, she drifted off with her brother’s hand still intertwined with her own.
Notes:
This fic continues to insist on long chapters compared to my other stories.
Yeah, that was Snoke in the kids' nightmare. He doesn't know who they are yet, but their awakening has been powerful enough that he noticed, and he's trying to find the source.
Finn deserved that slap. Not as much as Poe deserves one... well, Poe deserves a throat punch, really.
Hope everyone continues to enjoy this fic. I'm blown away by the statistics. This is six chapters in and there are 189 subscribers. My most popular fic, Snare, topped out at 180. I'm always startled still by the fact that anyone wants to read my stuff so this floors me.
Please feed me comments, they give me life and energy. Love all of you.
Chapter 7
Summary:
She tuned him out completely and sat brooding in her anger. The details would be best reviewed later anyway. When he finally finished, she stayed sitting as the room thinned out. Once there were only a small handful left, she walked over to Poe. Pava was talking to him and tensed as she saw her approaching.
“You didn’t give the timeline,” she said to Poe, “when do we actually expect to act?”
“It’s not concrete, but the goal is two weeks. You’ll be expected to train with Pava’s team in the meantime.”
She snorted, holding up her wrists and jiggling the suppression bracelets, “Do these come off for training?”
Poe looked at her, annoyed, “No.”
“Well, good to know that will be pointless then,” she said, contemptful. Her eyes darted to Pava, who looked like she would like to be anywhere else right now. “Two weeks?” she asked.
“Yeah, two weeks,” Poe repeated.
“Good,” she nodded, muttering to herself “That’ll give you time to heal…”
Poe’s brow furrowed, “Rey, wha---”
She spun, her fist connecting with Pava’s nose. The woman gave a startled cry, stumbling backwards, her hands shooting to her face.
Notes:
Been down with the flu for a week now. I missed four days of work, and at this rate I might be working from home on Monday if I don't improve greatly over the next few days.
So if this chapter isn't up to par or in anyway degenerates into gibberish it's probably because I wrote it while running a fever.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
She was tired, cranky and snappish with Poe when he showed up. The kids were clingy, and to be honest, so was she. The last thing she wanted to do was leave them, and at first she panicked, realizing she hadn’t thought about having someone come and stay with them. But a few minutes later Leia was there… apologetic that they hadn’t talked about arrangements yesterday and offering to stay.
Poe was strangely quiet, standing in the doorway as all of this sorted out, looking very uncomfortable, if not even a bit guilty. It was odd, he’d shown no remorse at all during their first meeting, and if anything she’d have expected him to be standoffish and angry with her.
Hell, it was more than odd, it was suspicious. If she hadn’t been completely sure that Finn wasn’t lying about the deal, she would be starting to worry. As it was, she cursed the fucking suppression bracelets and collar. She’d kill for the ability to peek into Poe’s mind right now, if only to settle her nerves that he wasn’t hiding something.
The prison turned base was a maze of corridors, she followed behind him, arms crossed in front of her, trying to remember the twists and turns. After awhile the silence began to feel oppressive, and she decided to see what information she could get from him, “What’s this council that you and Finn mentioned? There wasn’t a council when I was still a part of the Resistance.”
He glanced back, frowning, “There was, it just wasn’t so formal since upper command was still so concentrated. But there was always a group, Leia and Ackbar and some of the vice admirals and colonels that would meet to decide what the right course of actions were.”
“Maybe, but final decision came down to Leia…”
“Final decisions came down to Ackbar and Leia back then,” he corrected, glancing in annoyance. “Even in those days a general did not have the power to overrule an admiral in regards to the navy, or an admiral a general in regards to the army. ”
“I recall it always coming down to her final say.”
“Ackbar tended to cede to her. Which is probably why it’s a good thing we have power spread out more. There’s six admirals and seven generals, final decisions come to a vote.”
She huffed, “Must of been nice to be able to spread the blame out for… regretful decisions that you made.” He glanced coldly at her over his shoulder this time, and she smirked slightly, enjoying the fact that her words were rankling him way too much. They were silent for a few seconds, “How is Admiral Ackbar?”
Poe’s head dipped slightly, “We lost the Admiral at the battle of Abaran. He went down with his ship.”
“Sorry,” she murmured. At least it was one less person she had respected that would turn out to have been a part of this mess.
“War.” Poe shrugged, “He died for a cause he believed in.” The brown eyes bore into her, “You believe in anything anymore, Rey?”
Her eyes narrowed, “I believe in protecting my family.”
“Well,” he paused at a door, grasping the knob as he looked at her, “Other people have families too, don’t they?”
That hurt, and she had to bite her tongue to not snap at him that she couldn’t save everyone. Hell, she wouldn’t have even been able to save herself. She’d have had died at Snoke’s hand if Kylo had chosen to deliver her to him rather than run.
Of course, then she’d have died for her cause, and would have been revered as a hero rather than reviled as a traitor.
Poe shove the metal door open, gesturing her inside. The room was small and crowded, a command console in the center of the room. As she walked in, the background chatter came to an abrupt halt as every eye in the room turned a cold gaze to her. Stiffening, she parted from Poe and weaved through the crowd to the corner to an empty chair, sitting down and trying not to make eye contact with anyone as she looked at the command console.
Ultimately, she failed at that. On the opposite side of the room was Pava, leaning on the wall. Their eyes met and Pava stiffened before looking away. Rage surged in her and how she managed to not jump to her feet and scream in her fury was a mystery. Somehow, she forced herself to look away, listening as Poe began the mission briefing.
She partially tuned him out, listening just enough to pick up the critical details. There would be plans to study later to fill in any gaps she missed. The target was a small First Order base on the edge of Resistance territory. Taking it out would give the Resistance some breathing room, but the ultimate goal wasn’t just to push the Order back. The real goal was to secure the computer systems before the assault took place.
“The First Order purges their databanks of all local copies of information at the first sign of trouble,” Poe was saying, a map of the base displayed with the data center highlighted. “What we need more than anything right now is information. And to get that information we’re going to need to take them by surprise.” He glanced at Rey, “A small team lead by Commander Pava will infiltrate the facility with Rey’s help. Get in, secure the data, then we send in the full assault to take the base.”
Pava… lead by Pava… lead by Commander Pava… her fists clenched, “No.”
Every head in the room, except for Pava’s turned to look at her. Pava looked down, biting her lip, apparently having guessed the reasons for her objection. Good, at least the bitch had some shame after all she’d done.
“Excuse me?” Poe leveled a look at her, folding his arms in front of his chest.
“Not Pava. I’m not fucking going with Pava.”
Poe’s gaze didn’t falter, “You don’t have a say whose team you’re on, Rey. Commander Pava’s the best of the best, and I need my best leading this.” She gritted her teeth, glancing again at where Jess leaned on the wall, looking at the floor, refusing to even make eye contact with her.
“She tried to kill me,” she snarled, viciously enough that most of the room stiffened. “She led the attack on my family.”
“Maybe it would be best if…” Pava started, but then snapped her mouth shut as Poe turned his head sharply to her. She bit her lip and stared down at the floor again. Apparently she wasn’t too keen on them being teamed up either.
Poe turned and walked towards her, “You made a deal, Rey. If you want to change your mind, I can take you back to that cell again to wait for your trial.”
Flashing her teeth, she looked down, “Fine. Pava’s team.”
“Good, now if you could avoid any more outbursts, I’d like to finish the briefing.”
She tuned him out completely and sat brooding in her anger. The details would be best reviewed later anyway. When he finally finished, she stayed sitting as the room thinned out. Once there were only a small handful left, she walked over to Poe. Pava was talking to him and tensed as she saw her approaching.
“You didn’t give the timeline,” she said to Poe, “when do we actually expect to act?”
“It’s not concrete, but the goal is two weeks. You’ll be expected to train with Pava’s team in the meantime.”
She snorted, holding up her wrists and jiggling the suppression bracelets, “Do these come off for training?”
Poe looked at her, annoyed, “No.”
“Well, good to know that will be pointless then,” she said, contemptful. Her eyes darted to Pava, who looked like she would like to be anywhere else right now. “Two weeks?” she asked.
“Yeah, two weeks,” Poe repeated.
“Good,” she nodded, muttering to herself “That’ll give you time to heal…”
Poe’s brow furrowed, “Rey, wha---”
She spun, her fist connecting with Pava’s nose. The woman gave a startled cry, stumbling backwards, her hands shooting to her face.
Utter chaos followed, the handful of people left in the room in uproar as several rushed to Pava and Poe grabbed her and spun her to face him, hand digging painfully into her shoulder and eyes blazing with fury. “The fuck, Rey?”
“Better to get that out of my system now than wait till we’re on our way to the target,” she said cooly. Turning as much as Poe’s bruising grip on her shoulder would let her, she felt a wave of vindictive satisfaction at the blood oozing between Pava’s fingers.“I was pregnant. On Acisea,” she spat viciously, “I nearly lost them.”
She didn’t get to see if there was any reaction, Poe jerked her back to face him, snapping at the officers surrounding Pava, “Get her to the medbay,” before leveling his irate eyes on her. “She was following orders.”
“Fuck you, fuck her, and fuck her orders,” she snarled. Jerking her shoulder from Poe’s grip, she stormed into the hallway, breathing hard, getting about 50 feet before she realized she had no idea how to get back to the room she and the kids were in. So she stopped, waiting and fuming, until Poe finally left the briefing room, glowering at her as he walked over.
“Can I get a gods damned map of this place?”
“You can get a escort,” he said, sounding frustrated and angry. “I’m going to request you stay in your quarters unless you have one.” His hand grabbed her upper arm and she immediately jerked it from his grasp.
“Just take me back to my kids,” she hissed. Ignoring the glare he leveled at her before turning and leading her back through the maze of a base.
The first month or so after returning from Ahch-To had been awkward. Everyone was stressed, the remnants of the Resistance trying to regroup on a little moon in the Minonan system. Calls for help were received and ignored by Leia’s allies in the Rim. Luke was… Luke. Agitated, surly, and moody, probably wishing he hadn’t given in to her and come back.
She wasn’t one of them, not really. Other than Finn, she hadn’t known any of them before, nor had time to even make acquaintances with most before Leia had sent her to bring Luke back. In the aftermath of the losses taken during the battle of D’Qar, everyone was in a constant scramble, working long shifts and sleeping a few scant hours. It wasn’t clear to here were her place was in everything, leaving her feeling alone and isolated from the others. Finn was there for her, but she felt like she was holding him back, keeping him away from the new friends he was making. So she began to shy away more from him too.
Trees were still a novelty to her, so at night she’d sit outside by herself, staring up at the leaves as they blew through the wind.
“Guess there weren’t many trees on Jakku?”
She jumped, the voice was unexpected. Turning her head she saw a woman she’d see around the base but hadn’t met yet. Shifting awkwardly, she shook her head, “No trees. Not much of anything other than nightblossoms and spinebarrels.”
The woman walked over, “Care if I join you?”
Join her? “Um, okay…”
Sitting down, the woman offered her hand, “I’m Jess.”
She took the hand, “Rey.”
Jess winked, “I know.”
Of course they did, she looked back to the trees, feeling self conscious.
“Finn says you’re a hell of a pilot,” Jess said, leaning back on her elbows and staring up at the sky.
“I’m all right,” she said, self deprecatingly. Other than the Falcon and moving ships around for Plutt, she really hadn’t done much piloting outside of her simulator.
“Is it true you flew the Millenium Falcon through the wreck of a star destroyer?” Jess asked, grinning.
The grin was infectious, she smiled back, “I… yeah, we had two TIE fighters on us, I was trying to lose them.”
“I doubt more than a handful of the hotheads here would have had the balls two even try that, and maybe two of us could pull it off.” Jess winked, “Me, and maybe Dameron.”
She laughed, it felt good to laugh.
“A small group of us get together once a week for a few drinks… mix of the gunners and flyboys usually, with a few others here and there,” Jess began, and she couldn’t help but wonder why she was telling her this. “Lately it’s me and Poe, Finn, one of the gunners, Paige and her sister Rose. Snap when he can make it… would you be interested in joining us? Mostly it’s an excuse to let the big mouths talk your ear off, but it’s a good time.”
“I…” she stammered, feeling like she shouldn’t… after all, she didn’t really know any of these people.
“Come out once, if we’re too annoying you don’t need to again. We’d really like to get to know you.” Jess smiled, it was an open, genuine smile, and again she couldn’t help but smile back.
She had nodded, agreeing despite still feeling a little intimidated at the prospect, but Finn would be there, so there’d be someone she knew. It had been bit overwhelming, but she had been welcomed into the little group. She went the next week, and the next… By the time she went on her first mission, she considered most of the people she was fighting besides as friends.
She was still agitated when she got back to the room. The kids sensed it, she could tell by the anxiety in their eyes. Leia was acutely aware something had happened and hung around, helping get the kids settled with a children's holobook on a datapad.
Once they were properly distracted, Leia had her sit at the table while she made two cups of tea. Sitting down across from Leia slid one of the cups, picking the other up and studying her over the rim, not asking, just waiting.
Sighing, she picked her own cup up, keeping her voice quiet, “I punched Pava.”
Leia raised her eyebrows, saying nothing.
“Maybe not the best way to deal with my feelings…” she let her voice trail off. “But if Poe’s going to force me to work with her, I needed to get it out of my system.” Glancing at the woman across from her, “How much do you know about this mission?”
“Aclo has been being planned long before you were dragged into this,” Leia sat back, looking more like the commander that she remembered her. “Before we got the first clues that the Order is building something. Before my brother went off and vanished--- again. Initially we just planned to take out the base, push the Order back a bit and give ourselves breathing room.” Letting out a sigh, Leia stared down in her tea, “We’ve been taking heavy losses the last year and a half, lost a lot of ground. Aclo will be a much needed offensive to show Snoke we’re still able to deal him damage.”
“Intel just became more important given the new information, or the lack of it?”
“Whether it was worth the risk to try to secure the databanks and prevent their erasure became an important point.” Leia sipped her tea, “And given Luke had claimed he was going to breach First Order space looking for some answers, then never returned… well, it made everyone more nervous.”
“Do you think he was captured or he just…” her voice trailed off, and she sighed.
Leia frowned, she could see concern in her eyes, “I’m worried. I mean, Luke is Luke… but this was important. I’d like to think he wouldn’t have left at a time like this.” Sighing, “Of course he’s done it before, at times when we needed him, so no one really knows for sure. A lot of people assume the worst. Luke’s difficult, and some people here have resented the fact that we needed him, given how hard he is to work with.”
She turned the cup between her hands, breathing in the fragrant steam. It was soothing, her nerves needed soothing right now. “How did the plan get to finding me for it?”
For a moment, Leia was quiet, before she spoke softly, “Finn…” Her face must have fallen at his name, even after hearing him say himself that this was something he had planned, part of her was hoping it would have been started by someone else, anyone else. “He already knew where you were… not sure for how long, but he had tracked you and was keeping tabs on various ports you or Ben would visit once or twice a year. I think… I think he’d hoped to find you were being kept against your will.” There were flickers of anger in Leia’s eyes as she set her glass down and took a deep breath, “He went to Poe, Poe went behind my back to the rest of the council, by the time I heard about their plan, he’d already had the other on board for forcing me out of having any say.”
“How can they do that? I mean, it’s you .”
Leia gave a small smile, “We’ve grown, even as we’ve lost ground, we’ve grown as an organization. With that came the need for greater distribution of power, more people moved up the ranks, but that did mean my own power was diminished.”
She looked down, not saying what an utter load of bantha druk that seemed to be.
“Jess hated herself for Acisea.”
“What?” she looked up sharply.
Leia shrugged, “It haunted her. She regretted following orders.”
“Is that supposed to make it okay?” she snapped, annoyed.
“No,” Leia sighed, standing up, “but it’s still something. I better get going. Send me a com if you need anything, Rey. And let me know what your team’s training schedule will be, I’ll be happy to watch them.”
She nodded, watching the woman as she left, feeling completely and utterly exhausted.
He was in the void again, but alone this time. If this was a dream, maybe that meant Skye wasn’t sleeping? Didn’t matter, he needed to wake up, before the voice found him again… how did one wake up?
Yes, yes, there you are… I’ve been waiting… this time we shall meet child.
No… he wanted to turn, to run, but there was nothing, nowhere… how did one run when they didn’t have legs? The dark tendrils wrapped around him and he shrieked.
So afraid… the voice chuckled, ah you have much to learn.
Wake up, he needed to wake up…
No, not when you’re so open to me, it’s time for you to show yourself…
The tendrils jerked him forward, it felt as if he was slammed into the wall of nothingness around him, and the void shattered into giant shards, raining around him. He curled up, but the shards vanished as they fell, nothing ever touched him.
He blinked, there was a floor under him, black so shiny he could see his face reflected back at him. Sitting up, he looked around to find himself in a large room, everything shiny black or bright red. It was a frightening looking place, too dark, too clean…
“Ah… finally…”
His eyes widened as he looked up to see a… creature… descending down the staircase from a chair set up on a platform. It was dressed in a gold robe, face twisted and deformed, and as it walked it’s gait was uneven. He scooted backwards, eyes wide as it approached. “This is a dream,” he whispered, “just a dream this is just a dream…”
The creature laughed, “You are sleeping, but this is more illusion than dream... though that difference might be a concept beyond one as young as you.” It stood over him, blue eyes glittering, “And so very young to be awakening… and awakening with such potential no less.”
Nothing it was saying made much sense to him, and as it stooped towards him he tried to scoot back, only to find a gnarled hand seizing him by the chin and forcing his head up look up. It frowned, eyes narrowing for a second, before bringing it’s other hand down and pressing a single finger against his forehead.
Pain lanced through his head and he cried out, but an instant later it was gone, and he blinked his tear filled eyes up at the monster hovering above him, who burst out into cruel, almost gleeful laughter, “Oh, my fallen apprentice did have some secrets, didn’t he? That he would attempt to hide the get of him and his whore...” The creature stooped closer and he trembled as one of the twisted fingers caressed his cheek. “But the force itself decided to reveal his sins to me.”
The hand released his face, eyes glittering and voice gentle, “You think of me as a monster, yet the ones that came and hurt your father, attacked you and your sister, those are the real monsters, are they not, Solan?”
He blinked up in surprise at hearing his name, and the creature smiled, “They have him locked up like an animal, and they want to kill him… and they will, eventually, if you don’t free him.” It leaned close, “You do want to help your father, don’t you, Solan?”
Yes, he wanted to help his daddy. But he didn’t know if he trusted this… thing. Slowly he gave a single nod.
It’s eyes glittered, “Good… Now that I know how to find you, I can help you, as long as you tell no one about me. Listen for me and I’ll guide you when the time is right.”
Sol, wake up sol wake wake up baby wake up… the voice was a whisper, faint, but growing louder.
“Our time appears to be up… but wait, listen, I will show you the way to free your family.”
Solan! Wake up!
This time the voice was much louder, and the world around him shimmered as the creature made his way back up the stairs to its chair. His voice was gentle, weedling, “Tell no one about this, child, an I will be able to help you.”
SOLAN!
“SOLAN!”
He gasped, sitting up so quick he nearly slammed his head into Mom’s face. She was sitting above him, a frantically worried look on her face. “Ma...mom?”
“You were having a nightmare again, baby…” she stroked his face. “You wouldn’t wake up, you scared me.”
Skye was sitting up on the bed next to him, staring, frightened. There was a datapad on the bed, and he remembered Mom had been reading to them…
“Was it the same nightmare? Tell me about it,” Mom was staring at him intently, concern etched into every line on her face.
It had said it could help him… that thing in his dream. Help him help his daddy.
“I don’t… I don’t remember,” he lied. He didn’t trust the creature in his dream, but he didn’t trust the people here who’d dragged him away from his home either. Skye glanced at him, a small frown on her face, knowing he was telling a lie, but thankfully said nothing.
Mom sighed, “Are you sure? You’d feel better if you told me…”
He shook his head and her shoulders drooped slightly before laying on her side and urging them both to lie back down. Rolling onto his side next to her, he found himself staring into her face. She looked so tired, so worried. Her presence when he reached out with his mind towards her was dulled, as if there was a barrier between them. But he could still feel her emotions, a storm of anxiety and fear.
Reaching out, he brushed a finger across the metal band around her neck, “What is that?” Next to him, Skye rolled over and looked over him to see what he was asking about.
She frowned, and in that distant, dulled presence he felt a flash of anger and embarrassment, “It… it’s nothing. Don’t worry about it, Sol.”
“Daddy had one too…” Skye spoke from over his shoulder.
Mom closed her eyes tightly and took a deep breath, seeming to be deciding what to say, “It’s something that keeps us from using the force. They’re making us wear them while we’re here.”
He frowned, “Why?”
She shook her head, looking defeated and exhausted, “It’s time for bed, no more questions.”
“But…”
“No buts,” she said, getting up and walking across the room the control panel, dimming the lights and getting back into bed, “It’s bedtime.”
Skye gave an annoyed huff and flopped down on her side next to him. They lay their quietly for a few minutes before he rolled over towards Mom again, “Mom?”
“Sol…”
“Do they want to hurt Dad?”
Mom lurched onto her elbows, eyes focused on him sharply, “Who told you that?”
“N-no one,” he shifted under her gaze and reached out with his mind again.
Her eyes jumped from his to Skye’s, “No one, absolutely no one, is going to hurt your father.”
Fear.
That’s what he felt from her when she said that, fear.
She was afraid for Dad.
“We’ll all be together again when this is over,” she said, almost fiercely. “All of us.”
Notes:
Shout out to Ellie's Meow for suggesting Pava needed her nose broken after an earlier chapter. I decided this needed to be worked in. Hopefully Rey will find a moment in the future and kick the shit out of Poe as well.
Could my brain just be nice and let it go at vague "she considered Pava a friend?" No, of course not, so I had to give you a flashback where Pava is the first member of the Resistance to basically extend a hand to Rey.
Ugh, Snoke. Stay away from the babies. Sol's confused enough right now as it is.
Chapter 8
Summary:
“Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!”
They were hanging from his neck in an eyeblink, and he wrapped his arms around them in a smothering hug.
“We missed you, Daddy,” Skye said into his shoulder.
“I missed you too, I missed both of you, and your mom,” he nuzzled the top of her head before looking up at Rey. She’d crossed the room and was standing in front of them, he let go of the kids and caught her wrist, tugging her down to her knees.
“Hey!” she started, a playfully indignant tone to her voice. Whatever else she was going to say he cut off off with a kiss. She wrapped her arms around him, threading her fingers into his hair. When he broke off the kiss he leaned his forward against hers, forgetting everything in what he was sure would be a fleeting moment of bliss in this chaos. Because for whatever hell awaited them, his family was here and was together, all of the tangled together in an embrace.
He needed them, all of them, so badly. He was nothing without them.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The fourth most frightening moment of his life had been the moment that ranat bastard of a doctor had told him that Rey was pregnant. It had hit him like a wave, the realization slamming into him first followed by the overwhelming implications that threatened to drown him. There was no moment of hesitation as he drew his saber and separated the ranat’s head from his body. Leaving a witness wasn’t an option, especially not one that wouldn’t hesitate to sell information to the highest bidder.
Immediately following that was what was tied for second most frightening moment of his life, when he was sure Rey, in her fury at him for killing the ranat and her shock at the news of her pregnancy, was going to leave him. As it was he had been waiting for the shoe to drop and her to leave him behind. He’d been waiting from the moment he smuggled her from her cell onto a transport and made their getaway from the First Order. She’d surprised him, over and over, by staying with him. This time, he’d been sure, this time she’d be unable to forgive or forget and he’d be left staring at her back as she walked away.
He’d fallen to his knees, burying his head against her stomach and asking for her forgiveness. She surprised him by staying, even though he didn’t deserve her, he’d never deserved her.
Acisea, when the explosion had ripped through that market and he’d found Rey under the rubble, battered and bleeding, and thought he might lose her and his children nestled inside her, was what was tied as the second most frightening moment of his life.
But the most frightening, the most terrifying, moment was when he had to help Rey after she’d gone into labor, alone in hyperspace and far from their destination. With no idea of what he was doing he spent hours sure that he would lose all of them. He would do something wrong or stupid and they’d all die, leaving him alone, and it would be all his fault.
That didn’t happen, of course. The labor went as well as a labor could go. It was messy and painful, at one point Rey had nearly broke his hand in a crushing grip, but Solan had come into the word smoothly. Tiny and perfect and with a very healthy set of lungs screaming his protest at his introduction into the world.
A son, he had a son. He'd swaddled the baby clumsily, feeling as if he was wrong person to ever touch something as precious and fragile as this. Not with his hands--- so giant next to the tiny form of his son--- his hands that dealt in blood.
But he had cradled Solan gently as he went over to lie on the floor beside Rey, setting the baby in her arms before curling himself around her and resting his chin on her shoulder, staring down at his son’s flushed face. His hair had been blond at birth, and it clung clung to his forehead, and his eyes had been grey---it would be another six months before his eyes made their change to brown. The baby had blinked those unfocused eyes up at them, it’s rage at the offensiveness of this ordeal and the new world he’d been thrust into faded in his exhaustion, and he had fallen asleep in Rey’s arms.
It wasn’t over, there was another baby to come, they both knew that, but Skye was kind enough to give her mother a bit of a break before making her own dramatic entrance into the world. She came easier than Solan had, and quicker, but she had been just as determined on making her presence and distaste at the new world she had been forced into known with some ear shattering screams. His daughter. He had a daughter.
The hair plastered to her head had been jet black, her eyes then were a crystal sort of blue--- like Sol’s, they lost their baby color somewhere around 6 months, darkening into the green heavy hazel she had today. Her eyes had flashed intensely at him as he swaddled her, still feeling like he had no right to handle something this precious. They glared at him condemningly, as if she blamed him for her change of circumstance, her exit from that protected, warm womb into this the cold stark environment of the shuttle.
He snuggled her to his chest before handing her to Rey. Picking up Solan, he’d curled up next to Rey again, holding the two babies next to one another and just staring at them as if he couldn’t comprehend how this was even possible. Neither of them spoke, and the only sound from the exhausted babies was their calm breaths as they slept. The transport’s engines hummed, the blue light of hyperspace shone through the windows, reflecting off the metal walls. They were still nine hours from whatever pathetic dirtball on the opposite end of the rim that they’d been jumping to.
Eventually, Rey had raised her hand up, cupping his cheek before pulling him in close for a kiss, “Congratulations, Daddy.”
He blinked at her before looking back down at the tiny bundles they were holding.
“Are you going to be okay?” she had asked, voice tired but amused.
He shook his head, “I don’t deserve this.”
“Kylo.”
“I don’t deserve them,” he stammered, fear edging his tone, “I don’t deserve you. How---” his words had been cut off with a single finger against his lips.
“Shush,” she let her finger leave his lips and trace down to his jaw. “You deserve us.” Leaning over, she kissed him once more before pulling back and gazing into his eyes. “And more importantly, we need you.”
She adjusted her hold on Skye gently before looking back up at him and repeating it for emphasis, “We need you.”
The flashing light and buzzing brought him out of his memories and back to the stark reality of his cell. He was safely out of what he’d come to think of as the “zap zone”, laying as best he could on the uncomfortable, too small bunk with his feet hanging over the edge. Warily, he sat up, watching the door to see who’d come through. Since Rey’s visit, there hadn’t been a single person coming into his cell, just a droid that delivered his meals. The silence was starting to wear on him, too much time alone to fret and to worry about Rey and to simmer in his rage.
Then the door opened, and he held his breath a moment, would it be the lady or the rancor? As Rey walked in first he let the breath go and jumped to his feet, only to see who was behind her and fall down to his knees.
“Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!”
They were hanging from his neck in an eyeblink, and he wrapped his arms around them in a smothering hug.
“We missed you, Daddy,” Skye said into his shoulder.
“I missed you too, I missed both of you, and your mom,” he nuzzled the top of her head before looking up at Rey. She’d crossed the room and was standing in front of them, he let go of the kids and caught her wrist, tugging her down to her knees.
“Hey!” she started, a playfully indignant tone to her voice. Whatever else she was going to say he cut off off with a kiss. She wrapped her arms around him, threading her fingers into his hair. When he broke off the kiss he leaned his forward against hers, forgetting everything in what he was sure would be a fleeting moment of bliss in this chaos. Because for whatever hell awaited them, his family was here and was together, all of the tangled together in an embrace.
He needed them, all of them, so badly. He was nothing without them.
“Everything’s okay?” Kylo asked her, brown eyes anxious. He was sitting on the low bunk, legs held out straight since putting his feet flat on the floor would have meant his knees would practically be at his chin. Sol was next to him, snuggled into his side. She had pulled over the metal chair and sat on it with Skye on her lap.
“Mostly,” she answered. “First mission is in two weeks.”
His eyes flashed, and she gave him a pointed look to not to start anything about it in front of the kids. The last thing they needed was the kids to be afraid for her.
“Hrm,” he grunted, looking away. Reminding her without words how much he disliked her putting herself in danger without saying a real word. Glancing past her towards Leia, who hadn’t said anything, just followed Rey into the cell and went to lean against the wall in the corner, giving the family as much space as she could. “What about the kids when you’re gone?”
Skye and Sol looked up in alarm, “Why would Mom be gone?” Skye asked, the slightest bit of anger coming through.
Okay, so she probably should have discussed that with them already, but between their nightmares and her own exhaustion she hadn’t had a good time to do it. She shot Kylo a look that she hoped told him that he should have kept his mouth shut.
He gave her an exasperated look back.
“In a few weeks I’m going to be gone for a day, maybe two,” Solan’s eyes widened fearfully and Skye scowled. “It won’t be more than that, I promise. Your grandmother will be looking after you and you both will behave yourselves for her.”
“Won’t you be busy?” Kylo questioned Leia, raising his eyebrows up.
Leia rolled her eyes, “I might not be able to be with them 24/7, but if I’m needed in the command center, Threepio will be able to watch them.”
Kylo snorted and rubbed a hand across his face, “Oh gods…”
“Who’s Threepio?” Sol asked, still pouting.
“He’s a droid,” Kylo sighed as he ruffled Sol’s hair.
“A very nice droid,” she added, giving Kylo another scolding look. Threepio might be annoying but…
“He looked after me sometimes when I was your age,” he said, looking between Sol and Skye, a small smirk on his face, “he’ll talk your ear off. Just let him babble and tune him out.”
Across the room, Leia sounded amused as she addressed the kids, “I’ll bring him with to meet you two the next time I visit.”
“Can we come see Daddy everyday?” Skye asked, staring up at her intently. Solan looked up quickly, his brown eyes pleading.
“I…I don’t know if we can do everyday but maybe every few days.” As far as she could tell, someone was required to be with them during a visitation. She turned to look over her shoulder at Leia, “Could we work out a visitation schedule between us?”
“Please,” Kylo murmured, pleadingly, hugging one arm around Sol. She understood, the time alone in her cell had been maddening.
Across the room Leia looked up in surprise before nodded, “We’ll figure something out.”
Kylo looked away before he spoke almost begrudgingly grateful, “Thank you.”
Leia carried through with her promise to bring Threepio the next day. She had her training session with the rest of the strike team, and Leia was staying with the kids. Threepio’s fretting could be heard while they were still down the hall.
“Princ---I mean General… While I’m more than happy to help you in any way I do believe my skills are better suited to other tasks…”
Sitting on one of the chairs and lacing up her boots, she snickered. That damn droid hadn’t changed, had he?
“Of course, but there are very few people or droids I would trust with my grandchildren. You’re one of the few, so I know you’re up to the task.”
That got another laugh out of her, Leia knew that droid well enough, didn’t she? Some people might argue that droids didn’t have egos, couldn’t have egos. They all needed to spend a half hour with C3PO. They’d change their minds in a hurry.
“Ah, yes, well… of course I’m honored to serve in any way you wish.”
Yes, ego properly inflated and the droid was happier. There was a quick knock on the door and she called “Come in,” as she finished tying her other boot.
Leia walked in, Threepio behind her. She glanced at the kids to see them staring at Threepio, looking a mixture of confused and concerned. They stole a glance at each other and Skye just shrugged before they looked back at the droid.
“Miss Rey! It is very good to see you are well after all these years.”
“Thank you, Threepio, it’s good to see you too,” she answered, sitting up.
“Solan, Skye, this is C3PO,” Leia introduced the droid. “He might stay with you now and again if I’m unable to watch you.”
“Master Solan, Mistress Skye, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance,” Threepio rambled on, bowing slightly, “I am C3PO, human-cyborg relations.”
Sol looked from the droid to her, almost quizzically, as if he couldn’t quite process what this thing talking to them was. Skye’s brow furrowed, “Human-wha’ the what?”
“Human-cyborg relations. I am a protocol droid, I---”
“Forgive them, Threepio, they’ve never met a droid before,” she cut in before he could ramble on and further confuse them.
“Oh, well, yes, I see…” Threepio didn’t seem to know how to respond to that.
“You’ll get used to him quickly, I promise,” Leia winked at the kids before sitting down at the table. “Have you drawn anything new recently?”
They were still a little apprehensive with Leia, but slowly warming up to her. She turned and looked at them, “They have, why don’t you show your grandma some of your new drawings?”
Skye frowned, but Sol, being the sweetheart that he was, got up and went to grab some of the pieces of flimsi with his scribbles on them, bringing them to the table and sitting across from Leia and putting them down.
“Oh, these are lovely,” Leia said, looking at each one as if it was a masterpiece.
“Yes, they are quite…” Threepio paused, head tilted, clearly not able to decipher what the drawing was meant to be. Leia shot him a look and he quickly finished, “...nice.”
Skye glared at Sol for a moment, as if accusing him of being a traitor, before getting to her feet and getting some of her own pictures and stomping over to the table dramatically, dropping them onto the table and sitting down hard in the chair, crossing her arms across her chest and scowling. It took all her willpower not to laugh out loud at this absurd display. Leia cast a sideways glance at her, clearly also trying to rein in her laughter.
Pulling Skye’s drawings over, Leia began to look over them as intently as she had Sol’s. Somehow she managed to keep all amusement from her voice as she exclaimed with a serious voice, “These are beautiful, Skye! You are quite the artist!”
The scowl melted away, leaving the girl’s lips in a serious looking flat line. Skye looked away and for the briefest moment she saw her daughter’s lips twitch into a smile, then it was gone. Her expression flat again. Stubbornly carrying through with her decision that she would participate but not like it.
She fought back laughter again. Was it from her or Kylo that she got this epic determination and stubbornness?
There wasn’t much time to ponder that, there was a knock on the door and she sighed, getting to her feet, and opening the door for Poe. “Give me one minute,” she said as he stepped into the room. She walked over and gave each of the kids a kiss and a hug, “I’ll be back soon, you both be good for your grandma and Threepio.”
Poe stood just inside the doorway, looking impatient but saying nothing. She sighed, walking over and following him out the door and down the hallway.
Word appeared to have spread about her altercation with Jess, just judging from the absolutely pissed off glares she got from everyone when she walked into the training room. She did her best to ignore them, to walk straight and tall and not pretend like she wanted to cringe from the absolute level of hate she was getting.
These were the people her life was going to depend on. Fun. It looked like including herself and Pava there was nine of them total on the strike team.
She found a spot away from everyone, leaning against the wall. If these training sessions were the same as she remembered, today would be mostly physical exercise, with possibly pairing off for small team drills to work on communication and operating in tandem. How that was going to work out given the looks she was getting by the rest of the room.
Pava stepped in front of the room, bacta tape still over her nose. Several people glanced from Pava back to her, pure venom in their expressions. She crossed her arms, trying her best to ignore it. She didn’t pay much attention to Pava’s little pep talk, it wasn’t like she needed extra banthashit to process.
The exercise sets were brutal. Coming off a winter of being trapped in a small dwelling, she was out of shape, and being force suppressed meant she couldn’t tap into the force to help sustain her. She lagged behind most of the others in the room, clearly straining at points. It earned her more dirty looks as she struggled and looked like a liability rather than a help.
“Good. Fifteen minute break,” Pava called after they finished a run set.
She stumbled to a corner and slid down the wall, drenched in sweat and breathing hard. Most of the team had congregated by the table of water bottles across the room. As thirsty as she was, going over there and having to deal with all of them was far too overwhelming. Instead she leaned her head onto her knees as she caught her breath and let her heart settle down.
There was movement in front of her and she looked up to see Pava crouching down in front of her. She leaned back into the wall, glaring at her.
“You’re out of shape, Momma,” Pava said, matter of factly, holding out a water bottle. There was no venom in Pava’s voice, the woman seemed calm.
Reaching out she slowly took the bottle, “Been snowed or rained into four rooms for the last three months. You should have kidnapped me midsummer, I’d have been in much better shape by then.”
“I’m not worried,” Pava shrugged as she got to her feet, glancing at her as she turned to walk away, “I know you.”
Opening the bottle and taking a big sip, she let her eyes follow Pava as the woman crossed the room, not entirely sure what she had meant by that.
Towards the end of the session Pava began to divide them into pairs for a team work drill. It was essentially an obstacle course, some obstacles requiring teamwork to get past, and you were timed till both team members got to the goal at the end.
The man she got paired up with glared, “You’ve got to be kidding me…”
Pava turned sharply, “You say something, Kendet?”
Kendet scowled, “You expect us to work with her ?”
She leaned against the wall, cringing internally, staring at her feet. The room was silent for a long pause.
“Out.”
The voice was quiet, she looked up to see Pava staring intently at Kendet, who looked taken aback, “What?”
“You heard me, get out. Your off this team.”
“The fuck---” Kendet sputtered.
“Shut up and get the fuck out of my training room,” the slightest edge of emotion was in Pava’s voice now. Kedet’s mouth snapped shut, he walked to the table and grabbed his bag, shouldering it as he walked out of the room.
The remaining members of the team’s eyes darted at one another, clearly taken by surprise. Pava stepped forward, “We’re a team. Our lives are going to depend on one another, so if anyone else has issues with any of the team members, feel free to leave now, otherwise, I expect you to treat each other with respect.”
Pava waited, scanning the rest of their faces, “Anyone?”
Dead silence. She stared at Pava, slightly stunned. It made logical sense that she would react this way, after all she was a team leader, she needed her people to be willing to work together, but still… Pava coming to her defense just felt entirely unexpected.
“Good,” Pava took a breath, “Then let’s get back to work.” Turning to face Rey, “You’re teamed with me now. Let’s go.”
He was outside of the horrific scene that unfolded before him. Outside of it so he could do nothing but watch. Dad was in chains, dragged out in front of a jeering crowd and shoved onto his knees. The force vibrated with the hatred of the crowd. One of the men raised a blaster, putting it to the back of his daddy’s head.
No, no no no… he wanted to run in and shout at these people, run in and do whatever it would take to help his dad. But he was outside looking in, he didn’t even have a body, didn’t have eyes he could shut. There was nothing he could do but watch as the trigger was pulled, nothing he could do but witness the blood and gore and scream as his daddy’s body collapsed forward and the crowd cheered.
The scene shattered and he hit a cold black floor, shattered shards of the images raining down and vanishing into nothing.
“That’s what they want, that’s what will happen.”
The voice, that voice, the voice of the creature from his dreams. He looked up to see the twisted face staring down at him, “They’ll kill him and celebrate it. They hate him.”
A gnarled hand reached down, gripping his chin, “Wouldn’t you want to kill them all, kill them for what they did to your father, Solan?”
He blinked in confusion, he didn’t want to kill anyone.
The face frowned in disappointment, “I see we will have work ahead of us, if I’m going to see you to your full potential.” The hand on his chin tightened, “Would you kill to save him from the fate you just saw?”
His lips trembled and his eyes closed, only to be met by the image of his father’s head blow into bits of blood and bone. Letting out a soft cry he nodded, yes, he’d do anything to save his daddy.
“That’s a start,” it smiled darkly down at him. “Though if you listen to me, I doubt it will be necessary. Tell no one about me, and when the time comes I will guide you. I will show you how to free your father.”
The room around him faded into a void.
Listen for me, child. The time will come soon.
He gasped and sat up, his heart pounding. They were in bed, Mom next to him, Skye on the other side of Mom, both of them still sound asleep. Mom had been so tired when she got back, she’d gone straight to the ‘fresher and then had them all go to bed early.
Flopping back down he burrowed up against his mother, drawing comfort from her presence.
The scene he had saw, the screaming crowd, his daddy in chains, the blaster, the---
He closed his eyes tightly and burrowed his face against his mother’s breast. She muttered something but didn’t wake up.
What he saw couldn’t happen. He wouldn’t let it happen. If the only way to stop it was to listen to the creature from his dreams, he’d do that.
He would do whatever he had to do.
Notes:
Shoutout to Holland_Fray for requesting a flashback to Kylo helping deliver the twins.
Snoke is starting to traumatize me now. Poor Solan.
For the record, Threepio is really annoying to write.
Thank you to everyone for the support they're giving this story. Kisses for all the comments. You guys sustain me.
Chapter 9
Summary:
Kelen blinked at him in surprise, clearly having not expected an apology. For what seemed like an eternity, the room was silent as they just stared at each other. He waited, expecting a begrudging acknowledgement from Kelen and a retreat out of his office. Instead, the man leaned back, “You look like shit, Finn.”
He blinked, Finn? It had taken years for Kelen to even start calling him by his last name, once he had one. “We on a first name basis now, Athan?”
“You prefer Tico?” Kelen shrugged. “You still look like shit.”
“I don’t care,” he shrugged back. “As long as—what was it you called me when you kicked me off your strike team all those years ago? The first order traitor?” Once a traitor always a traitor, the prick had said. Apparently that memory was enough to get his temper to rise, exhaustion be damned. “Yeah, as long as you refrain from calling me that. Why do you care what I look like? You didn’t like me then, you don’t like me now. ”
“In my defense, I don’t like anyone,” Kelen leaned forward. “You’re still not over that, figures.”
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The command offices, like most spaces in the base, had been a dirty retrofit of a section of the abandoned prison. Walls torn out or dividers added depending on where it was needed. Most officers shared a space with three or four others. Private offices were reserved only for the highest levels of command, the admirals and generals each got their own space.
Which wasn’t to say that office was large or luxurious. His own office was an odd space, longer than it was wide and so narrow his desk barely fit. In its former life he suspected it had been a storage closet. The walls were a foreboding thick dark grey durasteel, windowless, and somewhat smothering, especially with the poor lighting wired into the room. He’d added more lamps, but somehow the room never seemed to get brighter, as if the walls absorbed whatever light he added.
It had some good points, the thick walls meant it was very quiet, very private. He liked that, even if in moments like tonight it made him feel even more lonely. That was okay too, after all, he wanted to be alone.
Since the council’s decision to agree to Rey’s demands, he’d kept his distance from her. Being around her brought a mixture of anger and guilt, anger at her for abandoning him, abandoning them . Giving up on all of them to vanish with a monster. The guilt was more convoluted, he blamed himself for not being with her that day on Batuu. He blamed himself for not being able to save her after her capture, to be able to get her home before Ren broke her.
But there was also guilt for what he’d done to her now, as much as he tried to dismiss it as having been necessary. Whatever else he might think, there was still no denying that she had been living her life peacefully on that moon. Her mind might have been twisted by Ren into thinking she loved him, but she had probably been happy. All of them had probably been happy. Gods knew that Ren didn’t deserve peace or comfort after all the things he’d done, but Rey? She did.
And he’d took that away from her. He hated that he had taken that away from her.
Along with Rey, he’d also been avoiding Leia. She was a mentor and a friend and he and Poe’s actions might be a power grab she’d never fully come back from. Already there were assholes like Kelen trying to make sure she never took her place back as the unofficial figurehead the rest of the council followed. He’d earned the guilt he felt for what they’d done.
Even Poe was at an arm's length right now, because he didn’t want the reminder of looking into the face of his partner in these crimes. With only a week left before they planned to move on Aclo, keeping his distance from Poe wasn’t that hard. The man was busy.
He wished Rose was here, even though he knew she’d be ashamed for him. For what he’d done. Glancing down at the datapad, the words “Access Restricted” screaming up at him in basic. Of course it was, there were two people currently with access permission for information on that operation, and he wasn’t one of them. For some reason that fact didn’t stop him from trying now on a nearly daily basis.
“Are you just expecting the permissions to fail one day, Tico?” an annoyed voice spoke from the doorway to his office.
Dropping the pad to his desk he looked up, Kelen leaned against the door jam, a surly expression on his face—not that Kelen didn’t always have a surly expression on his face. He leaned back in his chair, too tired to even be annoyed at the intrusion. Instead his voice was calm, almost amused, “You ever hear of knocking, Admiral?”
“You ever hear of not trying to access files you’re restricted from?” Kelen retorted, stepping into the room and walking up to the desk. “I figured Organa would have talked to you when you first started doing this. She and I both get the notifications when an access attempt was made and restricted.”
He winced, of course they were. That was something he knew, not that it seemed to be stopping the impulse to try.
Kelen dropped heavily in the chair across from him, “Clearly she hasn’t, since this keeps happening, and it’s getting on my nerves.”
“Everything gets on your nerves,” he said, dismissively.
“This is really getting on my nerves. You know better, General ,” Kelen snorted.
Yeah, he did. Not only was that information eyes only for the leads on the operation, but he had his conflict of interest in this particular task force. Rubbing a hand across his eyes, he sighed, “Yes, you’re right, I do. I’m sorry, Admiral. It’s been impulsive and I need to stop.”
Kelen blinked at him in surprise, clearly having not expected an apology. For what seemed like an eternity, the room was silent as they just stared at each other. He waited, expecting a begrudging acknowledgement from Kelen and a retreat out of his office. Instead, the man leaned back, “You look like shit, Finn.”
He blinked, Finn? It had taken years for Kelen to even start calling him by his last name, once he had one. “We on a first name basis now, Athan?”
“You prefer Tico?” Kelen shrugged. “You still look like shit.”
“I don’t care,” he shrugged back. “As long as—what was it you called me when you kicked me off your strike team all those years ago? The first order traitor?” Once a traitor always a traitor, the prick had said. Apparently that memory was enough to get his temper to rise, exhaustion be damned. “Yeah, as long as you refrain from calling me that. Why do you care what I look like? You didn’t like me then, you don’t like me now. ”
“In my defense, I don’t like anyone,” Kelen leaned forward. “You’re still not over that, figures.”
“Seriously? You looked me in the eye and told me I was untrustworthy because I risked my life to escape the First Order. That I couldn’t be trusted to give my loyalty to a cause.”
“I didn’t like you then because I didn’t think I could trust you, that your loyalty was ultimately to yourself, and frankly, I still am not sure I was wrong back then.”
He leaned forward, ready to tell Kelen to get the fuck out of his office. But Kelen was speaking before he could get the words out, “And I might not like you, Finn. I might think you’re too soft, not willing to take the hard line stands we need for this organization to survive. But I don’t doubt your loyalty now. And while I don’t like you, I also don’t dislike you.” A small smile curled on Kelen’s mouth, looking out of place there, “So to get back to it, you look like shit. When the fuck is the last time you slept well?”
Raising his eyebrows, he stared at the man across from him before shrugging, “Sleep in general? I got a few hours last night. Slept well? The day before Rose volunteered for the exploration team.”
“She understood how important it was… we got way too comfortable here. We knew they knew about this base, but we were arrogant. After all, we were deep within Resistance allied territory. The base is shielded. Eh, don’t worry, we can deal .”
“Yeah, I know. And then our allies fell one by one. Our other bases fell and pushed more and more of our people here. I know this, Athan. The only thing that’s keeping them from jumping in here with a dreadnaught and bombarding us into oblivion is the shields.”
“Bless the almighty empire for leaving that shit behind, but just because nothing can get through them now doesn’t mean they won’t find a way.” Kelen sighed, “I know you didn’t like it, and not just because your wife volunteered.”
“I’d rather spend our resources pushing back , taking territory back . Not looking for a place to run.” He closed his eyes and just sighed. They’d all made their opinions known over the course of the last few months.
“If we can do that, good. But that doesn’t mean we don’t still need to find a place where they can’t find us. Maybe the Rim falls, but we live on to lick our wounds and rebuild.” Kelen sighed, getting to his feet. “Anything happens to her, you’d know. Even I’m not enough of a dick to keep that from you, and Organa is never going to be that pissed at you.”
“I know that,” he shook his head, looking down at the desk. “The not knowing when I’ll see her again, that’s the worst part.”
The Admiral walked to the door before turning around again, “As of yesterday, all members of the team are accounted for and in good health.”
He looked up, surprised, and met Kelen’s green eyes. The man shrugged and spoke one last time before, vanishing out his office door, “Ain’t much but it’s the best I can do.”
Staring at the door long after the man was gone, he shook his head, feeling grateful. Twenty minutes ago, he’d have sworn Kelen was the last person on this base he’d have felt anything remotely like gratitude towards.
When the pair of stormtroopers appeared at her cell on the Finalizer and ordered her to her feet, she wasn’t sure what to expect. It had been three days since Ren had brought the med droid to hydrate her and inject her with the force suppressants. She continued to refuse to eat or drink anything given to her.
The suppressant drug was still very much in her system, and she hadn’t had the strength to fight. Starvation was weakening her, but as a matter of pride she refused to make it easy on them, refusing to get up on her own, making them enter her cell and drag her to her feet. Shackles were clamped over her wrists and she was shoved along in front of them, nearly stumbling and falling more than once. She knew she should be paying more attention to her surroundings, mentally mapping the corridors of the ship they were taking her through, but she couldn’t concentrate on anything beyond staying upright.
Were they taking her to Snoke? Or had they decided she wasn’t worth keeping any longer and she was being marched to her execution?
The troopers slowed as they walked down a long hallway with nothing but widely spaced doors. It… looked like a residential block? They halted her in front of one of the door and as it slid open she was roughly shoved through it. She turned her head slowly, if she moved fast she was sure to get dizzy, blinking at her surroundings, beyond puzzled. It was clearly someone’s living space. The scent of cooking food permeated the space and her stomach churned and grumbled.
“Take her restraints off and leave.”
She turned her head sharply, and too quickly, towards the voice. Vertigo hit her immediately and she stumbled, only to be jerked back straight by one of the troopers as the the other circled in front of her and removed the shackles from her wrists. Ren was visible in what appeared to be a small kitchen area, unmasked, standing in front of a stove transferring something from a pan to a serving bowl.
Her confusion was overwhelming enough that she didn’t even notice as the troopers left, instead she just stood, brow furrowed. There was a small dining table set with two place settings, a pitcher of water in the center between them.
“Sit down before you collapse where you stand.”
Raising her eyes from the table she saw Ren looking at her from the kitchen as he wiped his hands on a small black towel. He wasn’t in his normal attire… well, he was but not all of it. He wore the pants and boots, but his torso was stripped down to just a form fitting black undershirt.
“Wh-what…” her mind felt sluggish. “I mean… why am I here?”
“You’re having dinner with me,” Ren nodded towards the table. “Sit.”
When all she did was stand there, swaying slightly, and staring at him, he let out an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes in frustration and dropping the towel onto the counter. As he drew close to her she tried to take a step back and immediately tripped over her own disobedient limbs. She started to fall, only to be jerked back upright by the arm, Ren’s hand around her wrist.
She had tensed, expecting him to pull her to where he wanted her to go, but instead he released his grip on her wrist once she was steady again and walked behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders. She tensed, and his gloved fingers just gave a gentle, almost reassuring squeeze before Ren began to slowly and gently guide her towards the table. It occurred to her as he pulled the chair out and pushed down into it that she should have at least attempted to fight. Instead she sat, staring up at him warily as he reached over for the water pitcher, filling her glass and then his. Setting the pitcher down, he picked up the glass from his place setting, taking a drink from it while looking at her pointedly. Her brow furrowed as he set the glass back down and walked back to the kitchen.
Glancing at her glass, the pitcher, and his glass, her mind, feeling sluggish and tired from the hunger and dehydration, slowly worked out the meaning of that action. He poured from a common pitcher and made sure she saw him drink from his glass. To prove it wasn’t drugged.
Slowly, her hand reached out and wrapped around the glass in front of her. Then she let go, still feeling wary, what if it was a trick somehow? What if there had been something in this glass but not in his?
They’ve already proven they can just have a med droid inject you. What would be the point? She thought to herself. Her hand tightened on the glass again… it could just be about winning. Proving that they could trick her into taking the drugs herself? Okay, that sounded stupid the moment she thought about it.
Picking up the glass she took a small sip. It was cold, it felt good on her dry throat. Without even realizing it, she drained half the glass before she set it on the table. Her stomach clenched and cramped, and she knew she’d drank too much too fast. Closing her eyes, she took several deep breaths until her stomach settled. When she opened her eyes Ren was setting a bowl of noodles in table between them.
She stared, somewhat glassy eyed, as he sat down and served himself from the bowl, “The noodles are polystarch. Not the best from a culinary perspective but right now your system isn’t going to tolerate much.” Her eyes flicked from the bowl back to Ren. He twirled some of the noodles on to his fork looking her straight in the eye as he shoved them into his mouth, chewed and swallowed. “Eat,” he said, curtly, watching her with those dark, intense eyes.
Her eyes drifted back to the bowl between them, feeling tempted, and confused. Looking back up at Ren, she took a breath, “Why?”
His eyebrows raised, “Because you’re starving?”
“No, why… this?”
He didn’t answered, just stared, waiting. It irritated her. Weak or not, she refused to do something because he told her to. Or because he wanted her to. She dropped her hands into her lap, watching him coldy. He let out an exasperated huff, “Force feeding is very unpleasant, Rey.”
Despite the exasperation in his tone, her name was strangely gentle as it rolled off his tongue. Had she ever heard him address her by her name before? She didn’t think so.
“Why would you care?”
“Maybe I have better things to do than keeping you compliant while a med droid keeps you alive,” he snapped, defensively, his eyes darting away from her. “Your suppressant will be delivered by droid, I’ve ordered it to be removed from your meals and water. You have no reason to refuse it from now on.”
Her eyes narrowed at him coldly, stubbornly. She didn’t care. If her obstinance made their lives harder, she should keep doing it.
Ren dropped his fork to his plate, running a hand through his hair, and closing his eyes. When he opened them again, they locked on to her own, and she saw something in them she didn’t expect—a gentleness that seemed very out of place in her enemy’s face. “Please,” his eyes dropped to the bowl, then back to her.
For a moment she stared at him in confusion, warring with her exhaustion and hunger and her stubbornness on what she should do next. Slowly she reached out and took the bowl, putting a small amount of the noodles on her plate. Too much would probably make her sick after not eating for as long as she’d been refusing food.
Picking up her fork she had caught some of the noodles on the tines, not bothering to twirl the strands together, and shoved them into her mouth. Polystarch was polystarch, no matter what form it came in, but whatever he had coated them with was salty and flavorful and it took effort not to groan in pleasure. She didn’t want it to be that obvious that she was enjoying it.
As she swallowed she looked up, meeting his eyes, and the corners of his mouth had twitched into the tiniest of smiles.
She woke up sometime in the night, her brother sleeping next to her and her mother next to him. A third bed had been brought to the room last week. Mom had decided that they should just push it against the other two to make one big bed they way they had been doing when they had two, just with a lot more room so they didn’t have to scrunch together unless they wanted to.
Normally they did. Sometimes with Mom between her and Sol, sometimes with Mom on the end and her or Sol in the middle. Tonight she’d been mad and had slept on the edge of the bed as far away from them as she could, ignoring Mom as she tried to talk to her before letting out an exasperated sigh and leaving her be.
She’d been in a bad mood all day. Mom was tired most of the time now. She’d go with that man at some point on most days, the one that Leia had introduced them to and that she didn’t like or trust, and when Mom came back she was tired and would take a shower and lay down and not play with them at all. That made her cranky and cross and Sol too and that seemed to always make them get into arguments and fights with one another.
Which happened last night… she didn’t even remember about what caused it but Solan had gotten upset and shoved her and she’d hit him and then he’d bit her and she’d scratched her nails across his arm. Mom was there then pulling them apart and yelling at them and she hadn’t even really heard anything because she was so mad and she’d stomped her foot…
And mom and Solan were knocked backwards, like they’d been pushed… she’d pushed them, she’d felt herself do it even if she didn’t know how she did it. It was like the table right after they were brought here, she’d been angry and she slammed her fist into the table and it was like some beast inside her had found a pathway out and charged full force down into that table, leaving the metal twisted and bent.
Sol had pushed himself back crying and Mom had gotten up angry and afraid and grabbed her by the shoulders and told her she needed to make sure she never did something like that again or she was going to hurt someone. She burst into tears then because she didn’t know what she’d done or how she did it or how to stop it from happening again. And she was mad at Sol because he’d been mean and mad at Mom because she was mad so she’d stomped away and threw herself on the bed and cried. And when they came to bed she stayed on the far edge away from them.
Awake now, a headache from crying, Sol and Mom still sleeping, she rolled over closer to them. She was less angry at both of them now, but still angry. It was a low, pulsing anger at nothing and everything. Maybe towards this place, at these people for taking them away from her home. She hated it here. She hated not being able to be with her daddy other than short visits and she hated how worried Mom was all the time.
Next to her Sol whimpered, burrowing closer into Mom’s side. Mom didn’t stir at all as he pushed against her. She moved closer to him, snuggling against him, and then stiffened as her mind brushed against his and she felt something… something like sticky dark threads wrapping around her brother’s mind. It was something she’d felt before when they’d both been dreaming together and were in nothingness and those dark threads had grabbed him and tried to drag him away from her.
“Sol,” she said, quietly, as she shook him. “Sol, wake up.” He whimpered again, but didn’t wake. “Solan, please wake up.”
He didn’t. She stared down at him, not sure what to do. Mom was still sound asleep, and even if woke her how would she explain why? Glancing at Sol again, she put her hand on his forehead, laying close next to him.
They sometimes shared dreams. Just something that would happen now and again. If he was asleep and dreaming, maybe she could find her way into his dream, somehow… Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and pushed. Her headache from crying throbbed and then she felt something shift.
She was outside looking in. Sol was wandering through what looked like the hallways of this place they were in. A shadow moved in front of him, guiding him, and she heard the voice whisper, this, this is the room. When the time comes I will help guide you here. You will go inside and power down the main console, then we will be able to come for you and your father and the rest of your family.
You may need to kill those who get in your way...
Solan in the dream corridor stiffened, shaking his head.
The voice grew sharper, Would you prefer your father to die instead, child? You will do what is necessary to— the voice trailed off in a surprised hiss. Suddenly, she felt herself grabbed, dark tendrils wrapping around her and pulling her forward. She heard Solan yelp and the world seemed to break apart around her.
She slammed to a hard, cold floor, sprawling on her stomach. Pushing herself up with her hands, staring down, her face reflected back at her in the shiny black floor.
“Skye?” Sol said, softly, and she looked over to see him getting to his knees a little bit away from her.
Before she could answer, there was movement in front of her and she saw a man… no, not a man, not exactly. Whatever he was wasn’t human, rising from a black throne and stalking towards them with a twisted gait, gold robe swaying as he walked.
“And the other one, we finally meet,” he spoke, voice almost amused. “You were much better at hiding.” His face twisted into a smile as she glared at him, “Yes, such lovely rage.” A gnarled hand reached towards her and she hissed, trying to scramble away, but found herself unable to move. The hand stroked her face before cupping her chin and forcing her gaze up to him. “You take more after your father, and not just in looks. Quite promising.”
He raised his other hand and pressed one finger to her forehead. There was a sharp pain that spread through her head, through her mind, and she screeched. Her vision whited out and her ears filled with static. Then it was gone, and she blinked her tear filled eyes to see the creature standing still in front of her, but not looking at her. Her eyes followed to the side where he was glaring angrily, and she saw Sol sprawled on his back, wheezing.
“It’s not your place to interfere, boy, no matter what I chose to do or who I chose to do it to. I suggest you remember that, because my patience is not unlimited.” He glanced back down at her, smile twisting across his face again, “And you both need my help if you want to save your father. You don’t want anything to happen to your father either, do you, Skye?”
Her eyes narrowed, and he smiled coldly down at her, “You know those people want to hurt him, don’t you?”
Yes, she did, she could feel it from they had to go by when they went to see her daddy. Anger and contempt and hatred. But she didn’t trust this—thing. From him she felt darkness and something like greed… but not quite. So she glared up at him, eyes blazing and trembling with her own anger.
“Oooh, you don’t trust me. I’m all you have to trust, girl. Unless you wish to see this as your father’s fate…”
A scene flashed before her eyes, Daddy dragged out in front of a jeering crowd and forced to his knees, a blaster pressed to the back of his head and—
She screamed in horror and rage, the floor under her feet trembled. Anyone who tried to do that to her daddy she would stop, she would make them hurt.
“Yessss!” the voice above her sounded almost gleeful. “You would kill them all, wouldn’t you, girl?” She blinked up at the sinister blue eyes glittered down at her, the gnarled hand reached down again and stroked gently down her cheek. “Trust in me, child, and I will help you do it.”
His heels clicked along the shined durasteel floor of the throne room, trying his best not to let his nerves show as he approached the Supreme Leader. It was hard to judge when you were called before Snoke if you would get praise or rage.
“General Hux,” Snoke smiled, a cruel, twisted smile, but one that appeared to have no malice towards him. “The time has come for us to bring an end to the rebels, an opportunity is before us.”
He blinked, the Order had pushed the rebels back, taking their allies out system by system, but their main base had remained impenetrable. An ancient prison, one left over from the days of the empire, but with a shield system still strong enough to prevent them from breeching them even with the firepower of the new dreadnaughts. Their focus as of late had been containment, find the smaller, scattered bases and take them out, push more and more of the remnants of the rebellion onto that one base, where hopefully their resources would be strained eventually to the breaking point.
“An opportunity Supreme Leader?” he asked, trying to keep his voice from wavering.
Snoke chuckled, “Yes, in a weeks time, there will be a rebel assault on Aclo. They will attempt to secure the computers first, then lead a full assault. Be ready for them.”
Asking where this information had come from would probably be a good way to find himself bloody and battered, so he didn’t despite his curiosity. Aclo was one of the few bases he considered vulnerable do to its location and limited defenses. “We will be ready for them then...”
“Catch them by surprise, take out all attacking units and kill all but one . Ren’s whore will be there, I want her captured alive if possible.”
He blinked, Kylo Ren was not spoken of since they lost him and the girl after tracking them around the rim. “The--the Jedi girl?”
“Yes,” Snoke’s voice lowered to a hiss. “And there is more, we will prepare to attack the main rebel base at the same time, while they’re distracted by their attempt to take Aclo falling apart.” A smile twisted across Snoke’s face, “You will lead a ground assault team. Kylo Ren is being held prisoner there. I expect him to be brought to me, along with two children. Then we will raze that base to dust.”
“C-children, Supreme Leader?” His head was spinning, Ren’s abandonment of the Order, running off with that Jedi girl, and the subsequent failure of his to capture them, had lead to no shortage of pain as Snoke had made his displeasure known. The idea of having the chance to capture Ren made him feel slightly gleeful. But children?
“Ren and his whore’s get. A boy and a girl. I want them both, alive and unharmed.”
This was getting to be more information than he could process. Kylo Ren having children seemed utterly absurd. But he bowed his head, “Yes, Supreme Leader… but, forgive me, the base’s shields? Do we have a way to breech them?”
Snoke’s eyes glittered and his smile widened, “The shields will be deactivated from inside. Leave that to me, General. Leave that to me.”
Notes:
Starting to expand a bit on the situation the Resistance is in, what Rose is gone away for. Finn is feeling all levels of guilty right now, like he should. Some more flashback to Rey when she was Ren's prisoner on the Finalizer. Ren was already losing himself to her at that point, even if he wasn't acknowledging it yet. Then again, let's face it, he lost himself to her back in TFA in the forest on Takadona.
Hate having the kids fight and squabble but they're five, it happens. Skye is bossy and Sol is sensitive and they both have tempers, though as noted Skye's is simmering and broody and Solan's is a quick flash of rage that sizzles out quick. Unfortunately force outbursts now also happen. Poor Rey has no idea what to do about it.
Ugh, I'm sorry for more Snoke. Evil bastard. Unfortunately he's got a plan that he's starting to put into play.
Shit is going to hit the fan either next chapter or the one after, not quite sure yet.
Thank you all for the comments and for staying with this story even though it's emotionally traumatizing everyone.
Chapter 10
Summary:
Sitting now on the the transport shuttle, she took a shaky breath, trying to ignore the unease sitting like a stone in her stomach. Skye and Sol hadn’t wanted her to leave and tearing herself away from her babies had been agonizing. It would be fine, she comforted herself, this would go smooth and she’d be gone no more than a few days.
As the transport jumped to hyperspace, she closed her eyes, trying to center herself, trying to make herself relax.
“Rey.”
Opening her eyes she saw Pava walking towards her and she frowned as the woman extended a hand. It took a moment for her to spot some kind of electronic key in her other hand and put two and two together. Eagerly she held out her hands, watching as Pava applied the key and let the suppression cuffs fall away to the floor. Leaning forward, she offered her neck without being asked, and as the collar fell away she felt the power rushing back through her, sensed the nerves of the people around her. Nerves that had increased once her suppression gear was removed, judging from the wary looks she was given.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The following week had passed in a blur of training and studying the strike plan, worrying over her increasingly withdrawn and anxious children, and a growing unease at the impending assault.
Her fitness level had increased rapidly, and she was no longer struggling to keep up with the rest of the team. A team that was still far from warm to her, but at least seemed begrudgingly accepting. If any of them still had doubts about her, Pava’s warning had been enough for them to keep it to themselves.
Sol and Skye were not doing good. They had trouble sleeping, and during the day they were getting more and more snippy with one another. Arguments threatening to turn into fights at any moment. Given the trauma of the last few weeks of seeing their parents attacked and being violently uprooted from the only home they’d known, she guessed such emotional backlash was inevitable, but after Skye’s force outburst that had thrown both her and Sol, she was more paranoid about such emotional instability. It was going to lead to more trouble, and suppressed and alone, she couldn’t even begin to figure out how to start to teach a pair of five year olds force control.
She had visited Kylo without the kids yesterday, Leia leaving them with Threepio so they could have as much privacy as one could get when Leia was required to be in the room for the visit. He had been agitated, disapproving of her having agreed to put herself in danger, worried about her and what might happen to her during this mission. She should have brought up the kids, brought up the nightmares and the latest force outburst… but she couldn’t add another worry, not when he was already so worked up. Instead she’d nuzzled and kissed him and whispered that it was going to be alright. Even if they both knew she wasn’t remotely sure of that.
Sitting now on the the transport shuttle, she took a shaky breath, trying to ignore the unease sitting like a stone in her stomach. Skye and Sol hadn’t wanted her to leave and tearing herself away from her babies had been agonizing. It would be fine, she comforted herself, this would go smooth and she’d be gone no more than a few days.
As the transport jumped to hyperspace, she closed her eyes, trying to center herself, trying to make herself relax.
“Rey.”
Opening her eyes she saw Pava walking towards her and she frowned as the woman extended a hand. It took a moment for her to spot some kind of electronic key in her other hand and put two and two together. Eagerly she held out her hands, watching as Pava applied the key and let the suppression cuffs fall away to the floor. Leaning forward, she offered her neck without being asked, and as the collar fell away she felt the power rushing back through her, sensed the nerves of the people around her. Nerves that had increased once her suppression gear was removed, judging from the wary looks she was given.
Rubbing her wrists, she glanced at Pava, raising an eyebrow, “What happens if I refuse to let you put them back on when this is over?”
Pava’s lips curled into a wry smile, “Then they refuse to allow us, and you, access back to the base. No one gets in or out of there when the shields are up. I’m not about to fight you, but they aren’t going to let you back without them.”
She looked away, they had her kids and her man. Simple refusal to let her back to them would be enough to make her comply. No need to drug her or stun her.
Leaning her head back, she closed her eyes again and sighed, relieved to be connected to the force again, but no more at ease with what was coming then she had been before.
It had been early summer when they first landed in the clearing not too far from the abandoned base. The breeze had rustled the grass and the air had smelled of green growing things and damp dirt. Having hardly been planetside at all over the last year, aside from quick stops in ports to resupply and refuel, they left the shuttle’s hatch open, breathing in unrecycled air for the first time in weeks.
Kylo had gone alone to check out what remained of the base while the twins napped. He had never specifically said why he had wanted to land here and take a look at the long abandoned structure, but she could only imagine it was to scavenge for resources and salvage. The last few months she had suspected whatever credit supply he’d had with him when they left the Finalizer was beginning to run low. Kylo had been cagey about it when she tried to broach the subject, whether because it hurt his pride to admit it or because he didn’t want to worry her, or both, he’d refused to give her a straight answer.
She was sure if it had been up to him, he’d use the force, or his saber if necessary, to get anything they needed or wanted. But he knew she would be furious if he did such a thing, and he was wary of doing things that would make her mad. He was terrified of her leaving him, it was a deep set trench of fear in his psyche that she could often pick up in the force. Part of her wished there was a way she could ease it, make sure he understood that it would never happen, that she would never take the babies and vanish. She needed him as much as he needed her.
But there was another part of her, one that she felt guilty about, that was glad for that fear. Because she herself was afraid that was the only thing that kept him in line—he was still very capable of doing terrible things—kept him from doing things that her own conscious wouldn’t tolerate. His fear of actions that would drive her away kept him from stepping too far over the line from behavior she could accept.
If they’d been able to stay in a port even a few weeks, maybe she could find some work doing maintenance or repairs on the docked ships. Kylo certainly had mercenary skills he could sell, though she wasn’t sure how much she’d approve of that. Not that it mattered, even with the war heating up and diverting the attention of the Resistance and the Order, staying in port longer than to restock seemed too risky.
If there was anything of value left on this little moon, it might just give them another option.
While Kylo was gone and the twins slept, she dozed lightly, and when she had heard the sound of his boots on the shuttle’s ramp, she sat up, rubbing her eyes, and squinting towards the bright light of the hatch as Kylo appeared, dropping a bag inside the door. His boots were caked with thick mud, and his pants were splattered with it.
“Take off your boots!” she snapped. It was a little more forceful and cranky than she had intended, but he was tracking mud everywhere.
He froze, looking down at his boots and then behind him to see the trail he’d left. Bending down and fumbling with his laces. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “I’ll clean that up.”
She took a breath, feeling bad already for being snappish, “It’s okay, just, I mean the kids are going to be crawling all over here later.”
Kylo gave a wry smile, “A little bit of mud won’t hurt them, you know?” She glowered at him, crossing her arms over her chest, and he held up his hands, “Okay, okay, we’ll keep them locked in a sterile bubble their entire lives.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, irritated.
Kylo walked over, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her to his chest, tilting his head down to nuzzle his face into her hair. Her ear pressed against his chest and she could hear the steady beating of his heart, she sighed, irritation fading into a soothing feeling of peace. When he lifted his head up, she craned her neck to look up at his face and he kissed her gently before releasing her.
“Come outside for a bit,” he said, reaching past her to grab a blanket from the bunk.
She glanced over to where the babies were napping, frowning. He shook his head, “We’ll be right outside the door, if they wake up we’ll hear them.” Taking her hand, he pulled her towards the bright light streaming from the open hatch. Hanging back for a second, she gave in and followed him into the sunshine.
As he spread the blanket out she squinted up at the deep blue sky before closing her eyes and just enjoying the warmth of the sun, until Kylo tugged on her hand, and she opened them, letting him tug her down next to him on the blanket. He dropped an arm around her shoulders, a long, drawn out sigh escaping him.
“It is nice to be planetside,” she said, leaning her head on his shoulder. He nodded, eyes strangely distant and thoughtful. “Did you find anything interesting?” she asked, since he hadn’t said anything about his visit to the base. Maybe it was the scavenger that was still at her core, but she was dying to know what was there.
Kylo nodded slowly, still looking off into the distance, “I… did.”
She pulled back from him slightly and poked him in the shoulder, “Well?”
“It’s a little ransacked. Looked like they might have started trying to salvage equipment but maybe didn’t finish? I don’t know. The tech is older but there’s a lot down there, equipment and consoles and who knows what else. There’s even an old planter and a harvester… you could tell there were some fields that had been cleared once, even though brush is taking them over now. I guess whoever was here was trying to be self sufficient.” He paused, turning to look her in the eye, biting his bottom lip, “I… I mean, you, you should probably go tomorrow. You’d probably know where to look for valuable parts better than me. I can stay with the kids.”
“Okay.” She liked the idea of getting away and exploring. Scavenging was a hunt, in its own way, and she felt a growing excitement at the prospect.
“You don’t mind?”
“Seriously, Ky? Why would I mind?”
His dark eyes studied her face, “I just… I don’t want to have to turn you into a scavenger again. But… I figure we could get some of the more valuable parts and do a port run and trade for supplies.”
She rolled her eyes, feeling a wave of annoyance as she realized where this was coming from. Kylo felt like scavenging was something beneath him… beneath them , really. What a prideful idiot. Lovable idiot, but idiot.
“I’m always going to be a scavenger, Kylo,” she tossed her head up, “And there’s nothing wrong with that. If we can get by scavenging, it’s a far better way to survive than having to steal or murder.”
“Mmmhmmm.” There was a tone of indifference to the noise he made.
Rolling her eyes again, she huffed. Maybe it was good to get reminded now and again that the man who had fathered her children considered murder more acceptable than scavenging. He glanced at her and smiled, “You’re still so adorable when you’re annoyed.”
“I’m about three seconds from punching you, Kylo.”
“Is that so?” he raised an eyebrow.
She squeaked as he snatched her and hauled her into his lap, kissing her before mouthing his way down to where her neck met her shoulder. It felt good, she was tempted to just go with it, but chances were they were going to get themselves all hot and bothered and then have a very abrupt end to the festivities when the kids woke up and started to scream, since they were bound to wake any moment now.
Regretfully, she pushed him back from her. He pouted, exaggeratedly, before letting his embrace on her go and falling back onto his elbows, gazing up into the blue sky. She slid off his lap and flopped onto her back. The grass under the blanket was thick and soft and it was a lot more comfortable than the hard bunk on their shuttle.
“Any idea where we go next? After we sell whatever we take from here?”
He frowned, thoughtfully, “Maybe we should come back.”
“Back?” she turned her head, not sure what he meant. “Back where?”
“Here.” He glanced over at her. “It’s isolated, it’s in the middle of nowhere in wild space. Maybe we should stock up and just stay planetside for awhile. They’ve been too busy and lost our trail, so this might the best time to just find some place to stay put and not give them a new trail to follow.”
A breeze rustled the grass around them. Sitting up, she looked around thoughtfully. At least in this season this little moon seemed very pleasant. “Okay,” she said, quietly. “We stay here for awhile.”
Kylo smiled. She leaned over to him, her lips brushing against his—
“Maama-am-ma!” Sol’s voice wailed from the shuttle. Quickly joined by Skye’s cries. She sighed, pulling back, intending to get up, but Kylo’s hand caught her shoulder.
“I’ll get them,” he heaved himself to his feet. “Just stay here and enjoy the sunshine.”
She had squinted as he vanished into the shuttle, a gentle smile on her face.
The command center was crowded and the tension was thick enough to cut. Finn leaned against a console, twirling his wedding ring and staring at the floor. Kelen was in a chair off to the side, slumped over a console with his elbow braced against it and his chin in his hands. This wasn’t his operation, but it was clear he was monitoring it with interest.
“Admiral Dameron?”
He looked up from the holomap of the Aclo base being projected from the main command console.
"The initial strike team will break from hyperspace in three minutes.”
“Thank you, Lieutenant,” he said, quietly, looking back to the map. From the corner of his eye he saw Leia walking into the room. Eyes of the lower officers darted to her and most of the room, upper command officers and lower officers alike, stiffened ever so slightly. Not in a nervous reaction, no, this was the way people straightened and pulled their shoulders back when someone they respected walked into a room. Kelen was one of the few who did not, staying slumped on the console, chin still on his hand.
Admiral Kelen had held the main command over the navy since Akbar’s death, and he and Leia had locked horns when he’d taken over that role. At least once she bypassed him and gave direct command to the lower officers and ship captains when he wouldn’t budge, moves that the man had never forgotten. There’d been a personal vendetta to rein in her control and power ever since, and Kelen would undermine her whenever there were opportunities. For the most part, this attempt had worked on the council to lessen her influence. Within the ranks though, General Organa was still the person the credit stopped at, a fact that he was sure drove Kelen mynockshit crazy.
He knew that the power grab he and Finn had done in order to go forward with their plan had probably aided Kelen’s quest to sideline Leia and had also done a lot to secure the man’s own growing hold on the council. It worried him, and he felt guilty over it, but if this worked out today he would know it was for the best.
It would work out today.
It would have to.
He paced his cell, fear and rage combining into a beast in his core. Rey was gone now, gone from this base to go on whatever it was they were sending her to risk her life for them for. But it also meant she wasn’t here. She was somewhat safe in being away from this place.
They were using him and the kids against her, they were the hostages forcing her to comply with them. If he could get himself and Skye and Sol and escape, they would have no hold on her anymore to force her to put herself in danger.
His eyes drifted to a small jut of metal that stuck out of the bunk that hung from the wall. It was thin, narrow, and sturdy. Mentally, he could see him slotting the cuffs, both the shock cuffs and the the suppression cuffs against it, bracing them there as he pulled.
It wasn’t really a question of if he could use it to get them off, but if he could get them off fast enough. If he got the first shock cuff off before things could alarm, he might be able to withstand the jolt he was sure to get from the second one. Get both of those damn things off before they charged into his cell.
There was no doubt at all in his mind that he could handle the guards, suppressed or not. He could get out of the suppression cuffs once they were handled.
But that would still leave the collar. He wouldn’t be able to put enough torque on the band to break it off and not break his own neck. So he would be suppressed, but he was confident in his ability to fight the rabble, carve his way through this hellhole of a base until he found his children and got them out of here safe and sound.
The beast in him, the one that was reined in more by Rey’s will than his own, drooled at the thought of being set free, being allowed to leave a path of dead and broken in its wake. Punish those who took away all the things that belonged to him as he went to take them back and keep them safe.
Rey wasn’t here. Wasn’t here to be the reminder to put the beast back in its place, and it was clamoring to be free.
They would regret ever taking her away from him.
“—such is my lot in life, I suppose.”
She and Sol glanced at one another, then back to the the strange gold droid. He had been babbling nearly incessantly since Leia had left them, almost mournfully. She didn’t quite get about what, though he didn’t seem happy to be left with them. Judging from the feelings she was getting from her brother, he was pretty confused about it as well.
“Of course, I am honored, Miss Skye, Master Solan, that the princess—er, I mean the general—considers me to be one of the few she would trust to stay with you. It’s just child care is not a part of my protocols.”
Her brow scrunched, “General?”
Solan looked equally confused, “Princess?”
“Ah, yes, General Organa is also Princess Organa of the royal family of Alderaan. She much prefers me to call her general.”
“General Organa?” she asked, not sure who he was talking about.
“I…” Despite not having a face to express it, she somehow got the sense Threepio was flustered, not sure why they didn’t know who he was talking about. Then his head tilted, as if he realized where he was going wrong, “...Leia, your grandmother.”
Solan looked at her, then the droid, curious but bewildered, “She’s a princess?”
“She is the adoptive daughter of Queen Breha of Alderaan and her consort Bail Organa. So, yes, a princess.”
“Does that mean Daddy’s a prince?” Solan asked, looking intrigued.
“Where’s Alderaan?” She asked, beginning to feel curious and not just bewildered.
Threepio hesitated, “Alderaan was, tragically, destroyed by the Empire, along with all of Prin—General Organa’s family. The General, her son, and now you two as well, are the only remaining members of the Royal bloodline.”
“Wait, does that mean we’re a prince and princess?” Solan squinted skeptically.
“I believe, at least from a certain point of view, Master Solan, that yes, you would be considered such.”
She glanced at Solan, raising her eyebrows quizzically, and he shrugged at her, “That’s kind of cool.” Snorting, she gave him a half smile. This all sounded a little absurd to her, but whatever. It didn’t really…
Children.
Every muscle in her body tensed as the voice cut through her mind. Next to her Solan drew a sharp intake of breath, clearly hearing it as well. Threepio, was babbling on, oblivious to them.
It is time children. Follow my instructions, follow as I showed you in your dreams, and I will help you save your father.
Solan’s bottom lip trembled and she felt a growing resolve in him that was far greater than her own. As haunting as the image of her father’s death had been, as much fury as it had left in her core, in the end, the creature from their dreams did not seem to be someone they should trust.
There was a sudden flow of power in her, as if a switch had been turned on.
The droid, crush it, use the power and destroy it.
The resolve she had been feeling from Solan faltered, she herself pulled back from the command. Threepio, though annoying, was nice in his own strange way. She didn’t want to destroy him.
An angry hiss cut through her mind, and she could feel a seething rage that wasn’t her own. Sol shook in his chair, blood draining from his face. She could feel her brother’s turmoil and panic and it made tears prick into her eyes.
I. Said. DESTROY IT.
The voice seemed to white out the rest of the room for a split second and it cut through her mind like a knife. Biting her lip, she looked at the droid, feeling the surge of power through her. Power she somehow knew she could reach out with, and if she so chose crush the metal and circuits of the droid as if she was crushing flimsi with her hand.
But she could just as easily bend flimsi with her hand as crush it. And Threepio was a machine, he was made of wires and metal and circuits. She knew from watching her mom fix things that machines could be shorted out if the wires cross wrong. Most machines would just turn off, and once the problem was fixed, they would be fine to be turned back on again.
Her understanding of how to use it to crush had come from outside. How to manipulate the power more gently was not a part of it. But like with the force she could apply with her hand, it made sense that it was the same thing, just using it to a much lesser extent.
Wrapping herself around the power surging through her, she reached out towards the droid, reached into the droid, and instead of crushing, she just pressed lightly, moving the wires she wanted, crossing the contacts—
Whatever Threepio had been saying was cut off with a high pitch whine that emanated from the droid as it seemed to go even more rigid than normal. A split second later Threepio fell forward, face landing on the table with a thunk. She released the pressure, the wires bouncing back to where they belonged. He was turned off, but should be okay once someone turned him back on.
Solan stared, brown eyes wide and wet and startled. She reached over and squeezed his hand, “He should be okay. He’s a machine, I just kind of made him shut off.”
She sensed a begrudging acceptance from the entity now in her mind. He was not happy, she sensed, but found the result tolerable.
It is time. Let me guide you to the room children. If someone tries to stop you, at the least you must incapacitate them.
Taking a shaky breath, she looked at Solan. This was a bad idea. This thing from their dreams shouldn’t be trusted. But she was afraid of what would happen if she tried to fight against it. “Sol…” she said, weakly, feeling her eyes sting. He glanced at her, then got to his feet, walking to the door to the room and slowly reaching out and pushing it open.
Following, she walked over to stand next to Sol at the threshold of the door. A long empty hallway sprawled out endlessly in both directions, seeming to dwarf them in size and distance. They had barely left this room since they had been moved into it, and the world that existed outside of it felt very alien to her.
Suddenly she felt overwhelmed and very very small.
Her brother took a deep breath and let it go, resolve building. Squaring his shoulders, Solan took a step over the threshold into the hall before pausing and turning to look at her over his shoulder. The fear in his eyes faded, replaced with determination and resolve as he spoke two words to her.
“Let’s go.”
There was the slightest tremor through the transport as they dropped out of hyperspace. She felt the force shimmer around her with tension, and she got to her feet, walking to stand at the door to the cockpit. From the viewports she could see the small, brown and white planet, an unimpressive thing that somehow had become so important.
“Cloak is engaged Commander,” the pilot spoke, glancing at Pava. And then frowning as he looked past Pava to see her. The woman noticed, looking back to see her leaning on the doorframe, arms crossed, staring at the approaching planet.
“Need something, Rey?”
Biting her bottom lip, she shook her head.
“We’re going to enter the atmosphere in two minutes, Rey. You should sit down and strap in.”
She didn’t, chewing her bottom lip, she stared at the planet, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this. About all of this.”
Pava looked at her, almost gently, before walking over, “It’s going to be fine, Momma.” The force trembled with the tension that she had masked, Pava was just as anxious about this as she was, as everyone was.
The woman went to pass by, reaching out and squeezing her shoulder, voice far more confident than her signature in the force was, “It’s going to be fine.”
Notes:
Shit is about to hit the fan on so many different fronts.
Thank you all for all the comments and kudos. You guys give me life and energy.
Chapter 11
Summary:
“We have to,” he said, his voice wavering. What if she was right? He didn’t trust the voice, but he believed what they’d been shown was true. If they did nothing, Daddy would be killed. He couldn’t let that happen.
Yes. Yes. If you wish to save your father, power it down. End this.
End this? He wasn’t sure what that meant, but he walked to the console, stopping before it and raising his hand. All he had to do was cut its power.
“Sol… why would he want to help us? Because he’s nice?” Skye shook her head hard enough that her black hair whipped in front of her face. “That thing isn’t nice. I don’t know what it wants but it doing this to get something.”
He frowned, hesitating. She wasn’t wrong.
Ignore her, power down the console.
Somehow he knew this time it was speaking only to him. His brow furrowed.
“Sol, don’t. I mean… we should have told Mom. She’d have known what to do…”
Always in her shadow, aren’t you? Little weakling letting your sister tell you what to do. You know what will happen if you don’t do this. Turn off the console, Solan. Save your father.
Notes:
I'm dealing with so many characters with integral, intertwined plot lines that this chapter might be a little jumpy as I bounce between them. Hopefully it reads okay.
Just as an FYI, you guys can find me on Tumblr at carasstarwarsmusings. I do post links to my updates there. Along with lots of reblogs of star wars gif sets and random pictures of my horse and dogs.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
She closed her eyes as the shuttle magnetically locked itself against the durasteel wall of the base. Aclo was a fairly narrow complex, rising upward in an elegant spire. Not that aesthetics had influenced the design, the building’s construction allowed it to act like a giant antenna, allowing it to receive intelligence transmissions from deep space, and the height of the tower was necessary to send transmissions above the distortions caused by the planet’s turbulent surface.
“Rey.”
Pava stood a few feet from her, arms outstretched. One hand holding out a blaster rifle, the other her lightsaber. Ignoring the wary looks the rest of the team cast towards her and Pava, she reached out and took the rifle, slinging it over her shoulder, then took the lightsaber. It felt good to have her weapon back in her hand. Almost calming.
Almost.
“Get your oxygen masks on,” Pava ordered, “Atmosphere is probably breathable for short term but would be a strain we don’t need.”
The shuttle had docked itself below a ventilation shaft. That would be their point of entry, hopefully one that would keep them out of sight. From there it would be a brutal, vertical climb up the shaft to the upper levels of the base, where the data center was. Clipping her saber to her belt and pulling the oxygen mask over her nose, she waited for the roof hatch to be opened.
Pava gave one scan around the transport and then gave a nod for the hatch to be released. It let go with a loud pop, and faint sound of rain and wind could be heard from outside.
The team climbed out into a turbulent, storm of erratic, stinging raindrops and grit blown against them in the swirling wind. The ventilation access shaft was sealed with a large locked durasteel door, big enough that construction and repair machinery could be brought through. They waited while it was examined for the best way to breach it.
A scrawny redhead, Ran or Ram or something like that was his name, stood next to her, hunched slightly. Holding a hand out into the rain, he winced, leaning over to her, speaking loudly to be heard over the wind and through the oxygen mask, “Is it me or does this shit sting a lot worse than rain should?”
She glanced his direction, trying to pull her hands into her sleeves. It probably wasn’t too dangerous, but the rain was acidic enough to be irritating. “Not going to be on my list of potential vacation spots,” she answered, getting an amused snort in return for the quip.
“Think there’s no outside access,” a Lieutenant who’s name she’d forgotten yelled over the wind to Pava. “Going to have to blow it.”
Pava frowned, clearly having hoped to avoid using explosives since that would increase their chances of being spotted. “We need to get out of the weather so let’s get this over with—”
“Wait!” She stepped next to Pava, shaking her head, closing her eyes and reaching out, feeling the electromagnetic locks with the force. From the locks she traced the wires powering them, following them up into a junction… then a switch, an access panel.
The access door rattled and slid open. Every head turned to look at her, slightly stunned, until Pava’s voice broke the silence, “What are you waiting for? Get inside!”
There wasn’t need for further urging, the Resistance team quickly streamed through the shaft to a large durasteel landing suspended between four durasteel walls. The shaft was an endless drop below them, and a seemingly even more endless rise above them. A pair of ladders, one on each end of the landing, were embedded into the walls, climbing ever upward, broken only by occasional small landings with access doors to various levels of the base.
Pulling off her oxygen mask, Pava adjusted her blaster strap, looking at the two ladders.“Split the team half and half up each ladder, just keep pace with each other.”
The soft clang of feet on durasteel rungs echoed down the shaft. Ram… or Ran, the scrawny redhead who’d talked to her while they were outside, had lead position, with her right below him. The climb was steady and exhausting and seemingly endless, air blew up the shaft from below and out of small side vents they would pass along the way.
As they reached about the halfway point, there was a slightly wider landing above them, one that looked just big enough they could all squeeze on for a brief rest, someone halted on the other ladder, calling out, “Did you all hear that?”
They all froze in place, the landing above them, and she thought she might have heard something like a scurrying of small feet on durasteel.
Ram or Ran shook his head, starting to climb up towards the landing again, “Probably nothing, but we aren’t going to figure out what it is from below the landing anywa—”
His voice cut off with a surprised yelp as something small and leggy bounded off the landing, bouncing off his head and jumping to the opposite wall. It scurried downward, but her attention was on the redhead as he flailed backwards, falling, having lost his grip on the ladder in surprise.
Her hand shot up instinctually and she caught him with the force, freezing him in midair before pushing his body up right to the ladder. Once he grabbed on, she released her hold on him, and he turned to look down at her with wide brown eyes, almost disbelievingly. Glancing across at half the team on the opposite ladder, she realized most of them were also staring at her.
“What? You brought a Jedi for a reason, didn’t you?” she said, rolling her eyes. That got several soft and wary chuckle. “Anyone see what that thing was?”
“Gizka, which probably means this base is infested with the little bastards,” Pava answered. “Good thing they’re harmless, unless you’re wiring, anyway. You all right Ran?”
Ran, she made a mental note that his name was Ran, not Ram.
“Yeah… um… fine,” he tilted his head down to look at Rey, “thanks…”
She shrugged.
“Watch out in case any more startle us, but let’s get up to the landing and take five,” Pava ordered. “We’ve still got a lot of climbing to do.”
The hallways seemed like an endless maze.
Skye stayed next to him, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever been so happy to have her near him. Somewhere along the way he’d reached out and grabbed her hand, and neither had let go since. They walked down the long metal corridors, following an invisible beacon, a dark and murky pulse they could feel vibrating through their entire being, that the thing in their minds was somehow using to guide them.
“Sol!” Skye whispered, jerking him into an empty, open room.
“Wha—” he started, anxious to continue following pull of the pulse.
“Shhh!”
The sound of footsteps echoing the hall had him snapping his mouth shut, cowering out of sight until the people passed. He took a shaky breath as Skye leaned out into the hall, her black hair falling into her face.
“They’re gone,” she said, voice quiet.
He nodded, blinking back the wetness in his eyes, suddenly wanting to turn around and run. Wishing Mom was there to pick him up and snuggle him against her and tell him it was going to be okay.
Time is short, children. As is my patience.
They both stiffened as the voice hissed in their heads. The beacon grew stronger, feeling now like it was trying to pull them to it. He closed his eyes tight.
“Sol…”
He blinked his eyes open and his sister’s eyes met his, frightened and wary.
“I don’t know if we should do this,” Skye whispered, grabbing his hand, “That thing… we can’t trust him.”
“But Dad…” he started, weakly. He didn’t trust the monster in their minds either, but—
Something akin to annoyance and anger rose in the back of his mind. Then the voice was back, clucking disapprovingly, Doubt me, do you, girl?
An image flashed through his mind, the one the thing had shown him in the dreams, of his daddy being shot in the head while a crowd cheered. He flinched, shutting his eyes as if that could drive it away as it replayed on a loop. When it finally stopped he opened his tear filled eyes and saw Skye trembling in front of him, eyes glassy and hands clenched into fists. She’d been shown the same things too.
Is this what you want?
He took an almost mindless step towards the door, but Skye grabbed his shirt sleeve, jerking him back.
“It... it’s not real.”
Exhausted and numb, he stared at his sister, not sure of what to do. Then a low, angry hiss flooded his mind and he flinched.
Skye shivered, but her eyes hardened, breathing out through gritted teeth to the invisible presence, “I think you’re a liar. You’re trying to trick us.”
Such beautiful rage… oh you do have such potential. The anger in the voice and faded, slightly, and it chuckled, Solan knows I’m not lying, don’t you, child? He’s felt his mother’s fear, felt the hatred those people have towards your father. This will be your father’s fate if he does not escape.
He bit his lip. Mom was afraid, so afraid, for Daddy, for them.
If you want your father to live, you will do as I say, go to the room, deactivate the main console.
Closing his eyes, he shook his head at his sister, “We have to, Skye. We have to.” Determined, he took a breath and looked at his sister’s worried face before turning and walking out in the hallway again.
For a moment there was only silence and the sound of his footsteps, and he blinked back tears, he didn’t want to be alone.
Then the echo of footfalls running to catch up came, and he glanced back, relieved to see his sister following after him.
“They’ve just let this base go to shit, haven’t they?” Ran muttered, gripping the ladder tight as a dozen gizkas scurried past them, skittering of their feet echoing throughout the shaft. “Place is infested.”
She took a pull off her water bottle, looking down at the long legged, mottled-skinned creatures as they ran vertically down the shaft wall, “At least they’ve got to be used to hearing noises here cause of them. If they hear us, they’ll probably assume it’s them.”
“Positive thinking, nice Rey,” someone on the other ladder quipped, slightly sarcastic.
“It’s not like she’s wrong, Danab,” Pava replied, curtly. “And let’s move, we’re nearly there.”
The landing for their floor was too small for the entire team, so instead the first two from each ladder climbed up. She shook her head, “This floor is mostly empty. I’m not sensing anyone… a few droids, no people.”
Pava frowned, “We know they had minimal staffing on this base, it’s why we felt it was an easy target to reacquire.”
“This seems beyond minimal.” She stretched her senses out even further, straining to extend her reach. Nothing.
“We confirmed the databanks were online and transmitting their linkup to First Order servers.” Danub raked a hand through his brown hair, “If the base was abandoned they would have wiped them and severed the data mirroring.”
“Too far to turn back,” Pava sighed, readying her blaster. “Be ready and be wary. It all could be a trap.”
She opened the access door and checked the hallway, “Clear, let’s move.”
The team filed into the hall, moving forward cautious and slow.
“Droid ahead around the corner,” she warned.
Danub crept forward, peering around corner and slowly raising his blaster. He fired a single shot and it was followed by the sound of metal crashing to the floor. Glancing back at her, he smirked, “Nice trick, but can you tell me the model?”
She rolled her eyes.
“Shut up and keep moving,” Pava muttered.
There was little resistance as they advanced, just a few patrol droids they dispatched without being scene. It put her ill at ease, it was too easy.
The door to the data-center was locked, but the room itself was empty when they overrode the lock. Within the darkened room, consoles glowed, flashing and beeping. She walked over to one, cautiously tapping in a status request.
“Online, data is intact,” she glanced back at Pava.
“Sever the network link so we can secure the local data,” Pava said, walking to stand next to her. “If they discover we’re here remotely somehow, they could still send a purge comma—”
An alarm screeched, cutting off Pava’s words. Red lights flashed Everyone turned, looking around wildly with their guns drawn.
Everyone but her, she remained staring at the console. Her eyes widened, as her hands flew across the controls, “No!”
Pava spun, “Rey?! What?”
“They’re trying to purge the databanks. I’m slowing it down but I’m not sure if I can stop it.” She blinked, her eyes wet. She hadn’t gone through all of this to fail. “Jess, there’s a datastick in my bag.”
She felt confusion from the rest of the team, but Pava only hesitated for a second before hurrying over and finding the datastick. Jamming it into an access port, Pava glanced at her, “This will hold maybe a tenth of this, I’ll focus on the high security files.”
He stood on the bridge of the Finalizer, hands clasped behind his back. A gnawing impatience made him want to move, to pace the bridge and clench his fists. But to do so would be unseemly, undisciplined. Instead he fought the impulses, keeping himself still.
“General Hux?” Glancing down at the officer, he raised an eyebrow, waiting. “Data-center on Aclo was breached. Sending down an assault team and activating the security droids we had in hibernation.”
A small smile crept across his face, “The Supreme Leader wants the Jedi girl if possible, the rest should be executed.” Personally, he’d much rather see Ren’s whore dead. Her and Ren both laying in puddles of their own blood for all the trouble they’d caused. But alas, it wasn’t his decision.
“The rest of the rebel assault ships are still waiting in hyperspace?” he asked, blue eyes glittering.
“Yes, sir.”
“Well then,” his smile widened. “Tell our ships to ready the hyperwave pulse and drop out of hyperspace. I think it’s time we give that weapon its first combat run.”
Something was wrong.
He ran a hand through his hair, frustrated. The strike team should have breached the data-center of the base by now. Casting a glance at Finn, he saw the same concern in his eyes as well.
“Admiral Dameron, we’ve got a transmission from the strike team.”
Oh, thank the gods. “Put them through, now.”
Static burst through the speakers, followed by the steady howl of an alarm on the other end. Oh hell, “Jess?! Everything okay?”
“We breached the data-center, but a remote purge command was issued. We’re trying to download at least some of the data right now before it’s too late.” Jess sounded short of breath and slightly frantic. “Poe, the base is deserted. I think this may have been a tra—”
Pava was cut off by shouting and blaster fire. Faintly, he thought he could hear someone yell “security droids.” Then the transmission abruptly terminated.
“What happened?!” he snapped.
“Long range sensors are detecting ships dropping out of hyperspace at Aclo,” another officer spoke, voice wavering. “Sir, it looks like First Order ship signatures.”
No no no… this couldn’t fall apart like this.
“Tell the assault fleet to return to base,” Finn spoke sharply.
He spun, “The hell, Finn! We can’t…”
“Poe,” Finn might have been able to hide the fear and defeat from his voice, but not his eyes, which were pained and haunted, “if there are Star Destroyers waiting for them, they’re going to be blasted as soon as they drop from hyperspace.”
“The strike team…”
“Let’s hope Jess and Rey can get them out of their alive,” Finn said, quietly, staring down at his hands as he fidgeted with his wedding ring.
The room was silent. He clenched his fists and drew a shaky breath, closing his eyes.
“Patch me through the lead ship in the assault fleet,” he said, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. “I’ll call them back home.”
“What the hell are you kids doing here?”
He had been lost in the pull of that murky pulse that was guiding them, and hadn’t been paying enough attention to their surroundings. Stepping backwards as a man hurried towards them, he slammed into Skye, who squawked as she was knocked off balance. Their legs tangled together and they landed in a heap together on the floor.
Skye punched his shoulder in annoyance as they sat up and looked at the man looming above them. He was tall and imposing and had a blaster slung onto his shoulder.
“This is a high security area, you shouldn’t be here,” the man spoke, pushing back his helmet and squinting down at them. “The hell are you doing even wandering alone anyway?”
Opening and closing his mouth dumbly, he found he couldn’t get any words out. His heart was pounding in his chest and he felt frozen suddenly with fear.
“We got lost,” Skye answered, defiant, glaring up at the man. He blinked at her through eyes that stung with tears he was trying hard not to shed. Her hazel eyes were bright and dry and angry. It always seemed to be that way—what terrified him made her furious.
Kill him, the voice hissed through his head.
Blinking back tears he took a shaky breath, he didn’t want to kill anyone. He looked at Skye to see her nostrils flared and a defiant set to her jaw as she looked down and glared at the floor. She had decided she didn’t trust the voice, and unlike with Threepio, she wouldn’t be the one to do something this time.
“Lost?” The man shook his head, incredulous. “Who the hell are you, anyway? What’s your names?”
“Solan,” he mumbled, looking down.
“Skye,” Skye’s eyes flicked up the man.
So weak, boy. So afraid to act. I see I need to help you.
Anger surged through him, drowning out his fear. His teeth gritted together and he trembled with the force of it. It was nothing like the brief explosions of rage he had on occasion. This was sea of red fury, and he was drowning in it.
Vaguely he wondered if this was what Skye felt, why she was angry when he was afraid. This anger left no room for fear. It left no room for anything.
Yes… now use it to destroy your enemy.
A realization dawned in the man’s eyes and he grabbed his comlink, “You’re General Organa’s grandkids…”
His hand shot up and the man let out a shout as he was sent flying backwards into the wall, crashing into it with a sickening thud before falling to the floor in a heap. He stared, disbelievingly for a minute before getting to his feet. The anger was fading, the sea draining away now, and the fear was coming back. What had he done?
Numbly, he walked over to look at the man. Blood trickled from the back of the man’s head, but to his relief, he saw the man was still breathing.
The voice in his mind tutted with disappointment, And for a moment you had done so well, then your weakness comes back. There’s much to work on with you, boy, if you’re going to live up to your potential. But time is short, continue on children, follow my guidance. You’re nearly there.
“Amatera?” his voice was gruffer than he liked as he tried to swallow down a mixture of failure and guilt.
“We copy, Admiral Dameron.”
“First Order ships have emerged from hyperspace around Aclo, you are to abort and return to base.”
There was a pause, a hesitation, “The strike team, sir? Aren’t they still down there?”
He closed his eyes, “We’re going to have to hope they’re able to get out on their own.”
A pause again. Nobody ever liked hearing they were leaving people behind.
“Yes sir, we wil—”
There was a sudden squealing burst of static as the transmission cut off. His brow furrowed, “What the hell just happened?”
“I… I don't know, we suddenly got massive hyperspace distortions…” the communications officers hands flew across her console. “Sensors are getting heavy interference, but… it… I think our ships have been knocked out of hyperspace.”
“Knocked how?” Finn asked sharply.
“I-I don't know, sir.”
He raked a hand through his hair, the hell was happening here? “Are our ships still there? Can you get a hold of them? Any of them?!”
“Their new weapon,” Leia’s voice was soft, but her eyes were sharp as she stepped over to stare at the communications officer’s console. “They found a way to destabilize hyperspace?”
“That…” Kelen’s voice cut in, “how the hell could that even be possible?”
“I’m not getting any response from the assault fleet...”
He squeezed his eyes shut, people were talking over each other and it was getting hard to follow. A sudden beeping filled the room, and his head snapped towards it, “The hell is that now?”
“Sir! Kylo Ren just broke off one of his electro-restraint cuffs.”
“What?!” he turned sharply, catching sight of Leia tensing. “Get a gods damned squadron down there, I want his ass knocked unconscious.” Ren had to wait till now to attempt some shit like this? This was the last thing they needed.
The building around them trembled and she fought the urge to look up. So far she was keeping the system from deleting the most high security files, but if she stopped for one second it might be too late.
“What the hell was that?” Pava said, looking up from the console. Shouts and blaster fire echoed through the door from the hallway. The rest of the team trying to push back the security droids that had put together an assault.
“I don’t know, but it can’t be good,” she answered. “How much longer till you fill that datastick?”
“Maybe ten minutes… maybe we should cut our losses,” Pava shook her head, “take what we have so far and make a run back to the transport. Before it’s too late.”
She gritted her teeth, “You didn’t put me through all of this to cut your losses. We’re getting as much as we can, keep fucking downloading.”
“How are our communications links to the Aclo fleet?” he asked. “Can you connect us?”
“We’re modulating the frequencies to match the distortion field generated by the pulse. Communication link is up, General Hux.”
He smirked, perfect, not as good as if he’d been present to see the pulse used, but given circumstances… “Patch through the visual sensor feed from the Fellfire to the main view screen.”
The screen flickered a bit, and it looked at first as though the images were distorted with a strange rippling quality. But it wasn’t the image, but space itself that was distorted and wavering with the force of the hyperwave pulse. The rebel ships were adrift amid the small ripples of blue light rolling by—leaks slipping through the tears between space and hyperspace. They would heal as the effects of the pulse receded.
It was serene in its strange way, and he clasped his hands in front of his stomach, “It’s quite beautiful, isn’t it?”
“If you say so, sir.” The Lieutenant manning the communications link answered, clearly not sharing the same opinion.
He tutted, disapproving at the officer’s lack of enthusiasm, but otherwise opted not to chastise the man. Stepping towards the screen, he hummed, “The rebel ships are disabled?”
“Yes sir, most had all systems disabled when the pulse hit them. A few have managed to maintain minor subsystems, but all have engines disabled.”
“Well, then,” he turned, smiling down at the officer. “Let’s let the Fellfire have a little target practice, then.”
Kylo hooked the second cuff onto the jut of metal by his cot, hissing in pain as the shock jolted through him. Fighting through the pain, he jerked hard, twisting. The locking mechanism of the cuff squealed and then broke, leaving it to fall to the floor and join its partner from his other wrist.
Not much time, he crouched by the door, waiting. They would be coming. Coming to incapacitate him, or maybe to kill him. It didn't matter. In either case he fully intended to kill them first, suppressed or not.
The door burst open and he lunged, grabbing and breaking the first one’s neck, using him as a shield as he grabbed the man’s blaster and opening fire. It was on stun, but there was no time to adjust it. Everything blurred together in a mixture of shouts and stun bolts, but in the end he stood panting among seven fallen Resistance guards. He’d broken two of their necks, and taken the rest out with the blaster on the stun setting.
He walked back to his cot and broke off the suppression cuffs, keeping an eye on the door. Another wave might be coming, he needed to be careful. As the second cuff clattered to the floor, he raised his hand and fingered the suppression collar. There was no way he could see to get it off, not without breaking his neck.
That was okay, he adjusted the blaster to the kill setting. Suppressed or not, he was going to get his children back and escape this shithole of a base.
“I don’t know if we should do this, Solan,” Skye whispered.
They had found the room they had been guided to, the one it had shown them in their dreams. It had been locked and he had blasted the door off its hinges at the goading of the voice, though he was still not entirely sure how he had done it. The console it had shown them was there, all they needed to do was power it down.
“We have to,” he said, his voice wavering. What if she was right? He didn’t trust the voice, but he believed what they’d been shown was true. If they did nothing, Daddy would be killed. He couldn’t let that happen.
Yes. Yes. If you wish to save your father, power it down. End this.
End this? He wasn’t sure what that meant, but he walked to the console, stopping before it and raising his hand. All he had to do was cut its power.
“Sol… why would he want to help us? Because he’s nice?” Skye shook her head hard enough that her black hair whipped in front of her face. “That thing isn’t nice. I don’t know what it wants but it doing this to get something.”
He frowned, hesitating. She wasn’t wrong.
Ignore her, power down the console.
Somehow he knew this time it was speaking only to him. His brow furrowed.
“Sol, don’t. I mean… we should have told Mom. She’d have known what to do…”
Always in her shadow, aren’t you? Little weakling letting your sister tell you what to do. You know what will happen if you don’t do this. Turn off the console, Solan. Save your father.
He closed his eyes, feeling ashamed and angry at himself. His bottom lip trembled as he stepped forward and flipping the power switch. There was a whining hum as it shut off.
An alarm blasted, setting his ears ringing, and he shrieked in surprise, stumbling backwards. In the hallway lights were flashing.
Yes! The voice was gleeful and laughing, Yes, children! Now, find your father. Go to him. Hurry!
He looked at Skye, who was blinking back tears, hands over her ears. She met his eyes and the two of them ran out the door.
“What the fuck?!” Kelen snarled next to him, loud enough to be heard over the alarm.
Poe stared in disbelief as the alarm sounded. This… this couldn’t be happening.
“B-base shields are down!”
Okay, this wasn’t—it might still be salvageable, “Don’t panic… let’s not panic. Get someone down to the shield room… we might be able to to get them back—”
“First Order ships have just jumped into orbit… two star destroyers and a dreadnaught.”
For a few seconds there was silence, just the blaring of the alarm. Then Kelen stepped forward, “Send out the evacuation order. Full base evacuation, now!”
Leia took a shaky breath, “Skye and Sol, I need to get to them…” She rushed out the door. Finn stared after her moment and then hurried out, following her.
He didn’t try to stop him, instead he walked across the room and grabbed a blaster from a storage closet.
“The hell are you doing, Dameron?” Kelen looked at him, brow furrowed.
“Ren,” he growled. “If we’re going down I’m gonna take the bastard out first.”
Slinging the blaster over his shoulder, he strode out of the door.
On the bridge of the Finalizer, Hux was feeling quite pleased. More pleased, even, than he’d been watching the little rebel fleet at Aclo being blasted into debris.
He had no idea how the Supreme Leader had managed it, but the rebel base shields were down. The rebels were completely at First Order mercy, and he would delight in crushing them.
If it was up to him, he’d blast them to oblivion from orbit, leave nothing but a smoking hole where the prison turned nest of rebel vermin had once stood.
But it wasn’t, unfortunately, “Launch the assault shuttles, and remind them that there are three prisoners that must be taken alive.”
Three, yes, Kylo Ren, and two children. Ren’s children. If they were killed the Supreme Leader would be quite unhappy.
“Tell the Fulminatrix to begin isolated fire. I want the outer walls breached, but structural integrity must remain intact until our targets are captured.”
Ren’s children . That was still something he hadn’t quite gotten his mind around. Ren had bred . It was a slightly horrifying thought to think of that unstable, uncouth, destructive oaf as a father. Perhaps the little Jedi whore had been able to keep him in line, given that she apparently had managed to lead the idiot astray by his dick in the first place. For their children’s sake he rather hoped so. He knew more than enough about having a brute as father.
Not that it was really his concern. His concern was not getting his neck crushed by Snoke for failure.
“Ready my shuttle,” he ordered. “I’ll monitor the ground invasion in person.”
Notes:
So next chapter the shit will continue to hit the fan.
Poor Solan, he's just a sweet boy who loves his daddy. Snoke is already trying to twist his fingers into the kids psyche.
Poe still needs to be punched.
I really like writing Hux's POV. He's such a fun character. I'm looking forward to writing more of him.
Chapter 12
Summary:
He ducked into a doorway at the sound of approaching footsteps, staying out of sight as a frantic group rushed past. It would have been easy to step out once they had gone by and gun them down, and he had to fight the temptation. Part of him wanted to, wanted to gun down every last one of these sons of bitches for daring to mess with his family. He’d already killed a good number as he’d worked his way through the base, and he had took more than a little satisfaction with each one.
But another part of him, the part that was irrevocably and eternally concerned with Rey, stopped him. Rey accepted killing when necessary, but only when necessary. If he conducted a mass slaughter, no matter how deserving these bastards were, it… well, she would be disappointed in him.
Long ago he stopped worrying about saving his soul— it was a black, withered thing beyond salvation— but he did worry about having to meet Rey’s disappointed eyes. Whatever conscious he had now was an extension of hers, his actions reined in by concern of what she would think of him.
So he let them pass, listening to the blaring alarm and the blood pounding in his ears.
Notes:
Welcome to utter chaos as shit falls apart, lol.
It's not quite where I had intended this chapter to end, but given how long it was getting, I figured I found a decent stopping place.
Anyway, enjoy.
Extra edit note, I set the flashback portions of the story to be blockquoted, so it's easier for readers to tell which is the now and which is the then.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Time eventually ceased to have meaning during her imprisonment on the Finalizer. Even years later she wasn't entirely sure exactly how long it was. Weeks? Months? In the end it didn't seem to matter.
After her strange meal with Ren, another day went by with droids bringing meals she still refused to eat. Ren might have promised they would cease drugging her food, but she had no reason to trust him.
She was sitting leaning on the cold durasteel wall of her cell, head lolled back and eyes closed, when a pressurized hiss had her eyes snapping open in time to see Ren finish pulling his helmet off.
He tucked the mask under his arm and for a moment they just stared at each other. She met his calm gaze with a defiant one of her own. No matter what, she refused to be cowed before anyone, especially Ren.
Ren’s eyes drifted to the two trays with her food and water rations, then back to her, raising his eyebrows as if asking a question.
She shrugged, indifferently, closing her eyes again, intent on ignoring him.
The sound of the cell opening snapped her eyes open. Her entire body tensing as Ren entered.
“Relax,” he muttered, stepping over to stand over the trays with her rations. Crouching, he grabbed the polystarch loaf from the tray and took a big bite from it before sitting down next to the trays, leaning against the wall as he chewed.
Grimacing on distaste, he swallowed before chucking the loaf at her. She caught with one hand, keeping it from whacking her in the face, glaring at him.
Ren just smirked, “Not as good as my noodles, but as I said, not drugged. Eat.”
She glowered at him and he rolled his eyes as he took a sip of her water and slid the bottle across the floor to her. That she couldn’t resist. Grabbing the bottle she drank half of it before slowing down as the liquid churned I'm her stomach from drinking too fast.
Turning the polystarch loaf in her hands, she finally gave in and nibbled a small bit.
Ren smiled, looking irritatingly satisfied, “Do you trust me now? Or do I need to sample your other tray?”
Her eyes strayed to the open cell door. It was tempting to try to run, but she knew suppressed she'd have no chance of getting away from Ren unless she could somehow knock him unconscious. “I have no reason to believe the other tray wasn't drugged,” she answered, her eyes wandering back to meet Ren’s.
He sighed, exasperated, “You have my word.”
“Your word means nothing to me. You could be lying.”
The first sign of true agitation flashed across his face as he reached over and grabbed the polystarch loaf from the second tray, “I don’t lie, Rey.”
Taking a big bite from the second loaf, he watched her as he chewed.“You're a pain in the ass,” he offered, lobbing the second loaf across to her as he swallowed.
“Good,” she answered, taking another bite of the first loaf, chasing it down with a sip of water.
Ren just rolled his eyes and reached over for the water on the second tray.
A scream echoed down the hallway, followed by more blaster fire.
“Danab! Update?!” Pava shouted into her comlink, sweating as she leaned over the console.
“Three men down, but droids are starting to thin out. Think we've put a dent in their numbers.” Danab’s voice crackled across the com.
“If there’s an opening, you and the rest of the team make a break for the shuttle. Rey and I will catch up.” Clicking off the com, Pava spared a quick glance at her, “Rey, the datastick is about seventy percent full. After this current download completes we’re leaving.”
She shook her head, “No. We are not—”
“Yes, we are. I'm not suggesting. I'm pulling it when this finishes and we’re cutting our losses before it’s too late.”
Looking up for a split second she flashed her teeth Pava’s direction before continuing to work to prevent the system data purge.
“It's no use to anyone if we die here, Rey. You're not being rational.”
She forced herself to focus on the console and not get distracted, but the tears stinging her eyes were making it hard. “I’m not going to have gone through all this for nothing!”
“We’ve got something, because of you. Hopefully it’ll be enough,” Pava said, before pulling the datastick out.
She fought the urge to scream, to curl up and meltdown into hysterics. Instead she stepped back from the console, closing her eyes and breathing deep.
Pava’s comlink chirped, “Commander, we’re currently clear of hostiles, we’re going to make for the ventilation shaft.”
“Copy, we should be right behind you,” Pava replied. She felt Pava’s hand wrap around her upper arm, “Come on, Momma, we’re going to get you back to your kids.”
Opening her eyes, she glared at Pava, who just held up the datastick, “It’s enough, Rey. Come on.”
He had fallen into a routine, stopping by Rey’s cell once, sometimes twice, a day to take a bite of her food and a sip of her water to prove to her it wasn’t drugged. It was his first introduction to how ungodsly stubborn she could be. Later, over their years together on the run, he would get to know that trait of hers quite well. She knew the food wasn’t drugged, but she’d decided she wouldn’t eat it without proof, and if that irritated him, all the better.
They would talk, seemingly relaxed conversations, but often each word, softly and calmly delivered, would have a hidden edge meant to cut. Questions meant to linger as they pushed slowly poked at the walls of righteous morality they barricaded themselves behind, so sure they were each on the right side.
“One would think,” he pressed, sitting on the floor across from her as she ate her polystarch loaf, “that you of all people would understand.”
“Me of all people?” She raised her eyebrows, taking a bite.
“Where you’re from, that hellhole of a planet. Slave trade, poverty, starvation, people beaten and murdered by that brute of a junk boss when they’d step out of line.”
Rey just rolled her eyes, “Oh, I’m sure the First Order intends to come and save all of us… oh, what did that Stormtrooper call me back on Starkiller? Ah, yes, us scavenger scum .”
He sighed, leaning his head back, “Order will be imposed, the slave trade would be eliminated, people would be put to work, people would no longer go hungry.”
Her eyes narrowed, “Put people to work… sounds like you’re eliminating one form of slavery to impose another.”
Now he rolled his eyes, shaking his head. Stubborn, naive little girl. They lapsed briefly into silence.
Her eyes narrowed at him as she took a sip of her water, “Why are you here, Kylo?”
“Sorry?” he blinked at her, unsure if he was more off guard by hearing her use his name or from the question.
“Here, in my cell, talking to me.”
“Because apparently it’s the only way to get you to eat, and it’s still easier than force feeding you,” he said, trying to sound indifferent. “I’d be happy to stop coming if you’d just eat your damn food. It’s not being drugged, you know that by now.”
She shrugged, “Doesn’t mean it won’t be again. Fine, you need to show up and show me the food is safe for me to eat. But you did that, why are you still here?”
He blinked at her, mind fumbling for an answer that it refused to provide. He had justified his visits to himself for the reason he gave her. Force feeding was a pain in the ass, and a painful process for her. Snoke wanted her alive, so if he had to come and show her the food was fine, whatever, it wasn’t a big deal.
That reasoning failed to explain why he stayed? Why he spent the better part of an hour sitting on the floor of her cell talking to her as she ate?
Rey, being the sharp little beast that she was, had seen that cognitive dissonance, and had gone straight for his emotional juggler, forcing him to face the fact that what he was doing had no real reason… because it wasn’t that he liked her company. It wasn’t that he enjoyed being around her. No. He could not allow himself to even think about that.
Looking down at his hands so he wouldn’t have meet those sharp, intelligent—and beautiful—hazel eyes, he shrugged in response.
He ducked into a doorway at the sound of approaching footsteps, staying out of sight as a frantic group rushed past. It would have been easy to step out once they had gone by and gun them down, and he had to fight the temptation. Part of him wanted to, wanted to gun down every last one of these sons of bitches for daring to mess with his family. He’d already killed a good number as he’d worked his way through the base, and he had took more than a little satisfaction with each one.
But another part of him, the part that was irrevocably and eternally concerned with Rey, stopped him. Rey accepted killing when necessary, but only when necessary. If he conducted a mass slaughter, no matter how deserving these bastards were, it… well, she would be disappointed in him.
Long ago he stopped worrying about saving his soul— it was a black, withered thing beyond salvation— but he did worry about having to meet Rey’s disappointed eyes. Whatever conscious he had now was an extension of hers, his actions reined in by concern of what she would think of him.
So he let them pass, listening to the blaring alarm and the blood pounding in his ears.
At first he’d assumed that the alarm was due to his escape, but it quickly became clear something else was happening. Distant explosion, probably from the outer edges of the base, powerful enough to cause the floors to tremble violently. People scurrying around erratically, panicked. They were evacuating.
They were under attack, and it wasn’t much of a leap to guess who would be attacking the Resistance.
He choked back his growing terror and desperation which were competing with his never ending worry about Rey. It wouldn’t serve him, not now. His focus needed to be on finding Skye and Sol and then getting them out before it was too late. Rey would survive, it was what she did best, and she would find them. She was too stubborn to ever give up.
The base was more populated the further he worked inward, which was making avoiding being seen difficult. Thankfully the panic of the attack meant no one was looking for him. The few times he was unable to find a hiding spot, people rushed by him, unseeing and uncaring of their surroundings.
Another explosion sent a shockwave through the base, the force of it sent him stumbling, and he fell onto his hands and knees. Panic rose, what if the part of the base the kids were in collapsed? What if his mother had taken them already and fled? What if—
“DADDY!”
His head shot up, eyes wide and frantic.
Skye was rushing towards him, Sol a few steps behind her. He rose to his knees, pulling them tight against him as they wrapped their arms around his neck.
“You’re okay? You’re both okay?” he murmured, pulling back to look at them, ignoring the wetness dripping down his cheeks. He had them, thank the gods, he had them.
They nodded and then looked at each other, eyes wide. Solan looked back, tears already filling his brown eyes, his words running into each other as he spoke frantically, “I think I did something bad I didn’t know I’m sorry.”
He blinked, confused, as Solan burst into tears.
The base rocked hard, causing them both to stumble. Finn slammed against the wall and caught Leia before she could fall.
“If they were targeting the center of the base this place would be a heap of rubble by now,” he grumbled as Leia pulled out of his grip, shaking her head as she hurried forward. If she had any thoughts on the fact that the First Order appeared to be holding back, they were far buried behind her frantic worry over her grandchildren.
Not something he could exactly blame her for, he thought, as he followed behind her. Somewhere deep in the back of his mind the question of how this could be happening screamed in and endless loop, but he was too numb and focused to really process that right now. It was happening, and he intended to make sure Leia ended up on one of those transports. He owed it to her after all this to make sure she got out of here alive. And he owed it to Rey to make sure her kids got off this base too.
Leia skidded to a halt in the open doorway of the small quarters and he was pretty sure he saw the color draining even further from her face. He stopped in the doorway as she rushed inside and saw why.
The children weren’t there. C3PO was slumped on the table, non-functioning. Leia leaned over him, pressing his power switch. He powered on, looking around, as disoriented and confused as a droid could be.
“I… princes— I mean General,” Threepio started to ramble.
Leia cut him off, “What happened to children?”
“I— Master Solan and Miss Skye were just here…” Threepio looked around, “Oh, dear. I must of somehow gotten some wires crossed, I appear to have shut down, I don’t—”
The base shook harder, wherever the last pulse hit was closer, Threepio threw his hands up in alarm, “The base is under attack!”
“No shit,” he muttered, rubbing his face.
“General Tico!” Threepio seemed to notice him for the first time, “We’re in danger! We must evacuate!”
“We need to find Skye and Sol,” Leia growled, leaning forward. “You don’t know where they went?”
“I’m sorry, General. I don’t know why they would have left but—”
She spun, clearly about to rush out of the room, he caught her by the shoulders and stood in front of her. Leia flashed her teeth, looking for a moment a corellian hound about to lunge for the jugular. “Get out of my way, Finn.”
He shook his head, “You and Threepio head to the hangers, you need to get on one of those escape transports.”
“I’m not going anywhere witho—”
“I’ll find them,” he said, earnestly. He meant it. He’d either find those kids or die here. Death was probably better than having to face Rey if anything happened to her kids. “I promise, I will. But you need to get out of here.”
Leia started to shake her head, brown eyes flashing with the stubbornness he’d learned to expect from her. “I can’t. I need—”
Her words were cut off as the room rocked violently. The last thing he heard as the ceiling collapsed around them was Threepio’s panicked “Oh no!”
She gave in, letting Pava drag her from the data center. Pava was right, she knew that, not that it made her feel any more calm about the situation. They worked their way down the hallway, past dozens of blasted security droids and several fallen members of the strike team. The air reeked over ozone and blood and the scorched electronics of the droids.
“Here,” Pava tossed her the datastick, which she quickly tucked away in her pack. She unslung her blaster rifle, opting for now to use that instead of the lightsaber as they carefully backtracked their way down the corridors. “You getting anything, Rey?” Pava asked as they paused to check around a corner.
“Getting anything ?” she repeated, casting an annoyed look at Pava.
“Getting, feeling, sensing, whatever the fuck the right term would be,” Pava tossed her shoulders. “Educate me when we get back so I don’t piss you off next time.”
“No droids, at least not nearby or activated,” she answered, rolling her eyes. “Only living things I’m sensing in here are those critters nesting in the ventilation shafts and the remains of the team.”
Pava nodded, beginning to move faster and less cautiously as they worked their way towards the shaft.
“You’re putting a lot of faith in me being right about that,” she noted, dryly.
“Yeah well, if I’m going to trust my life to someone else’s assessment,” Pava glanced over her shoulder, “You’re at the top of the list of who I’d want it to be.”
She blinked, not sure how to respond to that, so she kept her mouth shut, following down the battle scarred halls. They were getting close to the access door to the ventilation shaft. Once there it would be the long climb down. She wondered if there might be something they could use to rappel down instead. It would be a lot faster.
Her heart began to pound as they came into sight of the access door, down at the end of the corridor they turned into. Every muscle and nerve in her body tensed and she grabbed Pava’s shoulder, jerking her to a stop.
“The fuck?” Pava turned, confused, and her brown eyes widened, “Rey?”
In the back of her mind she wondered what she looked like to get that reaction, but the forefront of her thoughts were taken with the single repeating thought screaming through her mind, something is wrong something is wrong something is wrong…
“Something,” she shook her head, not sure how to explain it.
“Rey, we have to go,” Pava said, voice calm but eyes worried. “We’re almost there. It’s going to be okay.”
“No, something is wrong, I don’t—” she froze, her eyes drifting upward.
Somewhere above them there was a large collection of force signatures approaching rapidly. Her mind buzzed numbly for a split second before she comprehended what that meant.
Transports.
And they were closing in fast. Very fast. She grabbed Pava and shoved her the opposite way down the hall just as the outer wall exploded inward. Her ears popped at the sudden depressurization as the enclosed environment of the base was exposed to the outer atmosphere. Diving on top of Pava, she did the best she could to shield them from the debris and the force of the blast with the force.
The sounds of wind and rain echoed down the hallway. They sat up, dazed, and she cast a look back to see the wind clearing the smoke and dust. A giant gaping hole was left where the far wall had been, and several floors above appeared to be taken out as well the ceiling crumbled and the rain now beating against the durasteel floor. The ventilation shaft was visible, the entire portion of it on this level had been blown to oblivion. She could only hope the rest of the strike team had made it down far enough to be away from the worst of the blast… and hadn’t been jarred loose of the ladders if they were still climbing down.
Bright lights shown in from slightly above from the transports, and she could see an access port opening on one.
She grabbed Pava and dragged her to her feet, “Run!”
“Nothing, nothing at all,” Hux had been fretting, glaring down at the reports from the recent planet survey. The constant whispers and brief sightings of the Resistance along the Rim had would lead them from one planet to another, leaving empty handed from each one as the rebels vanished like ghosts.
He was barely paying attention. Hunting down the Resistance had been Hux’s albatross since the First Order fleet arrived perhaps a half hour too late to catch the Resistance during their evacuation of D’Qar. Snoke had been furious, and Hux had been trying to regain favor since by tracking down every Resistance nest that popped up.
It wasn’t something he was as fanatical about. There had been two reasons he personally had cared about the hunt for Resistance cells—finding Skywalker and finding the girl. Those were the two failures that Snoke wrapped around his neck like a noose, reminding him constantly that the Resistance had found Skywalker before he had, reminding him constantly how he had been bested by a girl who had never held a lightsaber.
That girl was now in their custody, and Skywalker, according to their intel, had gone missing. Typically he was wary and suspicious about such intel… spies were not reliable, and if they were discovered it was possible the Resistance would feed them false information to filter back to the Order. But he believed this, for one, because it was exactly what he would expect from Luke. At his best, Luke was unstable and unpredictable, and very prone to abandoning those who need him at the worst possible moments.
But he also believed it because of the girl now sitting in the ship’s brig. If Skywalker had still been with the Resistance, he would have been on Batuu with Rey, and chances are both of them would have slipped through their fingers. They had been able to apprehend the girl because she was alone and not nearly ready to be by herself.
His thoughts drifted to Rey. Once this meeting was over he’d have to stop by her cell and “prove” to her that her rations were not drugged. It was an unnecessary thing, and quite annoying, and he absolutely was not looking forward to going to do it. Not looking forward to seeing that stubborn little brat’s face. Of course not, that would be absurd. Just as it was not becoming the favorite part of his days, because that would also be ridiculous.
“Are you even listening, Ren?” Hux had spat, irritated.
Slowly, he had looked up, studying Hux through his mask’s visor. He knew Hux hated the mask, hated not being able to read his face and expressions, so he made sure he always wore it when the two of them had a meeting.
“Yes. You once again have failed to track down the Resistance that had been sighted in this system.” Hux bristled immediately and he smirked behind the mask, “Where will this wild caranak chase go next?”
Hux huffed, “It won’t. Snoke is meeting us here with the Supremacy to regroup and decide our next course of action. And he requested you contact him immediately.” A trace of resentment crept into Hux’s tone.
A wave of panic hit him. He was going to have to deliver the girl to Snoke. The reprieve of the last few weeks was ending.
“I will do so immediately,” he said, standing, more grateful than ever for his mask’s vocoder to hide the emotion invading his voice. The girl could be an asset to them, she was strong, she could be turned. The Supreme Leader would surely see the potential. He wouldn’t waste that.
He couldn’t waste that.
He pulled Solan close, trying to comfort his son while keeping a watchful eye on their surroundings. Thankfully the base was quickly becoming deserted, though that likely also meant finding a ship to steal and get off this hellhole was getting more difficult, “Shhh, it's okay, it's going to be okay.”
Skye stared at him, a frightened but angry glint in her hazel eyes, “I said we shouldn't. We shouldn't trust him.”
Every nerve in his body sparked in alarm. Him. Him . He looked at Skye, then pulled back to look down at Sol, swallowing the growing lump in his throat, “Him?”
“He said they would kill you if we didn’t,” Sol’s voice shook as he sobbed. “That we had to do it to help you but I think I shouldn’t have—”
“Solan,” he gripped Sol by the shoulders, peering at his face, trying to keep his voice from shaking or getting too loud. He was afraid what the answers to the next question would be, afraid he already knew what it would be, “Who told you that? What did he tell you to do?”
The base shook from another impact, and Solan burst into a new set of sobs, not answering. As he closed his eyes, pulling Sol close to him again, Skye answered for her brother, “The guy from the dreams.”
Goosebumps broke out down his arms. It had to be Snoke.
“He’s in our heads,” Solan was burrowing his face against him, voice muffled. “It… he… said that all we had to do was turn off a console and it would help you.”
It took a moment for it to click together with what exactly it all meant. Snoke, the evil fuck, not only had discovered that the children existed, but he had used them, manipulated them, into lowering the base’s shields. He hissed angrily through his teeth. The fact that the Order hadn’t turned this entire base to dust by now had to mean they intended to send in ground forces. If they were sending in ground forces, they had to be looking for something or—someone.
Sol stiffened in his arms, and Skye’s widened anxiously at him. They either saw or sensed his growing rage. He grabbed Skye and tugged her against him, hugging them both tightly, “It’s okay. It’s not your fault, it’s not,” he kissed each of them on the side of their heads. “But I need you both to listen carefully. Do not trust that voice, not matter what he does to frighten you.” He stood up, looking down at them, “We need to get out of here. I want you to stay behind me but stay close.”
They looked up at him earnestly and nodded, and as they did another wave of fear hit him. If he had to choose between falling into Snoke’s clutches verses the Resistance, he’d chose the Resistance. But if they found out the kids were the ones that lowered the shields—“Whatever happens, don’t tell anyone what you did, okay?”
Skye and Sol shared a glance at one another before nodding. Sol looked like he was going to burst into tears again, so he crouched down once more, “I need you both to be brave and strong. It’s going to be okay, as long as you listen to me and do what I say—”
“Hold it!” a voice shouted, followed by the whine of a blaster rifle charging in high power mode.
He leapt to his feet, spinning to shield the kids behind him, snarling as he saw Dameron standing fifteen feet away, blaster rifle leveled at him.
“Help! Heeelllp! I’m trapped! Oh, it’s no use, we’re doomed! Doomed!”
He groaned, pushing himself up weakly to his hands and knees, bits of rubble and debris falling from his back, “Threepio, shut up!”
“General Tico! You’re alive!” Threepio answered, excitedly.
“Glad you sound more sure about that than I feel,” he squinted through the dust. It looked like the ceiling had given in, Threepio sat towards the middle of the room, his one of his legs pinned under a chunk of debris. But where was… where was…
“Leia!” he stumbled the few feet to where she lay unconscious, shoving a few chunks of duracrete and durasteel off of her before cradling her torso in his arms. Her hair was matted with blood from a head wound, but he felt for her pulse and was relieved to find it steady.
“Oh no,” Threepio prattled mournfully, “the princess!”
“Is alive,” he said, before Threepio could say anything more. He laid her back down gently before hurrying over to Threepio, looking at the chunk of duracrete pinning the droid’s leg. “Need something I can use as a lever,” he muttered, more to himself than Threepio.
“Leave me, sir! Save yourselves!”
He rolled his eyes, “Uh uh. I need you to help me get Leia to the hanger so we can get her on a transport. And then I expect you to look after her.” There was a long rod of durasteel among the debris, he thought it might had once been a leg from the table. Wedging it under the duracrete on Threepio’s leg, he managed to rock it enough that they could pull the droid’s leg free.
“Oh! Thank you, sir!” Threepio began.
Ignoring the droid, he went back to Leia, picking her up gently, “Come on, Threepio.” He hurried out into the hallway, which appeared to have taken less damage, though there were still patches where the ceiling had crumbled. Threepio followed after him, trying to catch up, muttering “oh dear” over and over. The hallways were deserted, but the hanger was jammed with people slightly frantically loading on the transports.
Carrying Leia over to one of the shuttles, he yelled into it, “Need a medic!”
Heads turned, someone came rushing over, and he heard them gasp, “Oh gods, Leia.” They shouted back into the transport and in a blur she had been pulled from his arms, a small mob of medics surrounding her.
Wiping sweat and dust from his forehead, he backed up, tapping Threepio on the arm, “Go with her.”
“And what about you, sir? Surely, you must be coming with us?”
He shook his head, “Someone’s got to find those kids. I told her I would and—”
“Was that Organa?” an aggravated voice spoke. He turned to see a very surly looking Kelen glaring at him.
“Yeah,” he answered, “the medics are taking care of her. She should be fine.”
Kelen nodded, “Good, if we lose her morale will go to shit. We’re going to need her to rebuild, as a figurehead, at least.”
He stared at Kelen, anger rising. Taking an extraordinary amount of effort, he forced his anger back and restrained his impulse to punch the asshole. There was no time for that, he had to find those kids. “Excuse me,” he said, irately, moving to walk past Kelen to leave the hanger.
Immediately Kelen sidestepped to block his path, “The hell you think you’re going? You need to get on your transport, General .”
“I told Leia I’d find her grandkids, so I’m going to go do that. Get out of my way, Admiral ,” he moved to leave again.
Kelen blocked his path again, green eyes glowering at him coldly, “We’re going to need our leadership to get out of here alive. As it is, Dameron’s already run off and I can only hope he doesn’t get killed and can make it off this base in time. No way in hell you’re going anywhere but on that shuttle.”
Gritting his teeth together, he stepped menacingly towards Kelen, “Listen here, Admiral, I don’t answer to you. I made a promise and I’m going—”
A white light filled his vision as he was knocked backwards, his muscles seizing and freezing up as he hit the ground hard. Kelen stepped over him, and as he slipped towards unconsciousness he saw the stun rod flashing in the man’s hand.
“Nothing personal, Finn. Just saving your life,” he heard faintly as darkness took him.
She had come to anticipate Kylo’s visits to her cell. It was one of the few breaks to the endless monotony of her imprisoned life, and the only interaction with something other than a droid. It was an odd thing to admit, that she looked forward to the visits from a man she considered a monster, but it made sense, she supposed. Even a monster was better than the silence.
Why he continued to come, not only to prove to her the food was safe to eat, but then to stay and talk, or argue, with her as she then ate the meal continued to confuse her. It made no real sense to her, unless somehow it was meant to manipulate her. But why? What would be his endgame?
Being unable to understand him frustrated her. As did the fact that found herself enjoying his company and the low key war they waged against one another with words. Kylo Ren, she was beginning to realize, was more than just a brutish thug. He was a keenly intelligent man, one who would offer justification for his beliefs and perverse morals. More than once his arguments for why he believed himself to be right were a challenge to counter.
Ultimately, she was beginning to realize he believed he was right, and justified, in his actions. That such things were for a greater good. It was hard to reconcile a monster who earnestly thought he was on the right side.
Footsteps echoed down the hallway, and a small smile crossed her lips as she stared down at her feet. When he stopped, she looked up, still smiling, expecting his cocky, often mildly exasperated smirk in return. Instead she found his eyes cold, impassive, his face blank. The smile faded as dread filled her.
“Get up,” he said, voice monotone and emotionless.
Was this it? He had said she was to be brought before Snoke, had the time finally come? Trying not to show her fear, she got slowly to her feet as the cell door opened.
“K-kylo?” she ventured, voice trembling slightly. She stared at him, hoping to see signs of the man who had been visiting her daily for the last few weeks. But there was nothing, his face was blank and his brown eyes cold. He walked over, grabbing her by the upper arm and pulling her out of the cell.
She stumbled to keep up as he pulled her through a maze of corridors. The thought crossed her mind to try to fight— he hadn’t bothered to put her in shackles— but she was still suppressed, and she was fairly certain she had no chance of besting Ren without the force.
They reached a hanger bay and he continued to pull her along towards a looming black upsilon class shuttle. As he opened the access ramp, an officer hurried over, looking alarmed and confused.
“Commander Ren, sir,” the officer sounded vaguely confused, “would you like us to get your pilots?”
“No need,” he answered, voice cold, “I’ll pilot it myself.”
Panic finally hit her as he pulled her up the ramp into the shuttle, “Where are you taking me?!”
Silence was the only response. He dragged her with him to the cockpit, shoving her into the copilot’s seat as he sat down at in the pilot’s seat, tapping rapidly on the console. She glanced down at the copilot console, hoping to at least be able to track readouts of what he was doing, but it was dead. He’d locked it out.
Slowly she glanced around. The shuttle was empty, at least that’s how it appeared. No stormtrooper guards, just them. If she could somehow knock Ren out, or… or kill him, maybe she could steal the shuttle and escape.
His head turned to look at her, eyes narrowing slightly, and she shrank back into the chair. He knew what she was thinking. She stared straight ahead out the viewport as the shuttle took off, exiting the hanger bay for open space.
She blinked, there was something in the distance, a ship, a very very large ship. “Wh-what is that?” she asked, voice shaking despite her best effort. It wasn’t really something she needed to ask. There was only one ship that big in the galaxy. The Resistance had the schematics for it and she’d studied them in the past. It was—
“The Supremacy,” Ren answered quietly.
—Snoke’s ship.
A shudder passed through her. This was, was really it?
“You’re taking me to Snoke, then?” she asked, her own voice sounding distant.
There was a burst of static as the com came to life, an aggravated voice filling the shuttle, “Ren? What the hell do you think you’re doing? Launching without pilots or a guard assignment?”
Ren’s eyes drifted down to stare at the com, one hand still punching instructions into the console. The man on the com continued, “I understand you’re eager to deliver your package to the Supreme Leader, but this—”
The voice cut out as Ren idly pressed a button, turning the com off. His eyes drifted to her, staring into her eyes as he answered the question she’d asked before the com interrupted them.
“No.”
His left hand slapped down on the console, and she had gripped the armrests of her chair as they jumped into hyperspace.
Notes:
As a reminder you can find me on Tumblr at CarasStarWarsMusings.
I really wanted to work in the flashbacks to Ren and Rey's eventual escape from the Finalizer throughout this chapter. Hopefully it works and it's not too jumpy. There's a lot of bouncing between characters which always makes me worry.
Please feed me comments. I thrive on them ;)
Chapter 13
Summary:
“What are you—” Pava started as she walked over.
The rest of the question was cut off as she slammed the panel cover into the wall repeated, the noise echoing loudly throughout the small shuttle. Pava jumped, and from inside the panel skittering noise started, and less than a second later five gizkas bolted from the open access port below the console and rushed down the open ramp into the hangar bay.
She dropped the panel to the floor with a clatter before l reaching into the panel to adjust some wires. They’d been chewed but still seemed mostly intact. When she was done she took a deep breath and threw the power breaker.
A low hum filled the shuttle and the lights flickered several times and then burned steady. Pava took a surprised step back, then walked to a console and began tapping.
“It’s got fuel, not a lot but enough for a short jump, and power cells haven’t bled out all their juice yet.” Pava shrugged at her, “Not sure if I like the idea of trying to breach the atmosphere in this rust bucket but—”
“Not like we got options,” she nodded in agreement. Reaching over pressing the button to seal the hatch.
Notes:
Sorry about the wait between updates, life has been pretty nuts. But here's a nice 6700+ word chapter to make up for it.
A reminder that I've now shifted to have the flashback portions of the story blockquoted to distinguish them from the main storyline.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“We got no chance to get back to the shuttle, even if it hasn’t been found and blasted to scrap yet.”
They were wedged against a wall, chests heaving as they tried to catch their breath while making sure they were out of the line of sight of their pursuers. The respite was going to be short, they had managed to pull away from the storm troopers that had been giving chase, losing them in the maze of corridors, but the sounds of boots and voices was getting closer.
She shouldered her blaster, her mind spinning, remembering the holomaps of the base and it’s layout. There was a central stairwell with access to all levels. “What are the chances there’s still some ships in the base’s hangar bay?”
“I don’t know, seems like they had left in a hurry,” Pava tightened her grip on her blaster, frowning. “The hangar is down at least thirty floors, Rey.”
“No shit?” she answered, sarcastically. “We’ve got to be close to the stairwell.”
“Which is completely open and lacking any sort of cover. They’ll be able to get a bead on us from fifteen levels above us.”
“Got a better idea?” she asked coldly.
They jumped at sound of voices nearby, this little break needed to come to an end.
“No,” Pava answered before taking off at fast jog down the hallway, “Let’s find that damn stairwell.”
It had been dead silent on the shuttle.
Ren had said nothing since the jump into hyperspace. He stared blankly ahead, expression flat and unreadable. She darted wary glances his direction, trying to get some sense, any sense, of what was going on. But he didn’t move, he just sat, staring at the blue flickering light through the viewport, emotionless and dead eyed.
He’d dragged her from her cell and shoved her on this shuttle—this empty shuttle. Judging from the officer that had offered to get his pilots to the com asking what he was doing taking her without a guard detail, that had not been something that was expected or normally done. And instead of going to Snoke’s ship, which had been approaching, he’d jumped away, headed to—somewhere.
Was he defecting? Kidnapping her? Was she still his prisoner? Following some other orders to take her somewhere that Snoke had given only him? Could this all be some trick to get information out of her?
Shifting in her chair, she built up her nerve and cleared her throat.
No response, no reaction. Huffing in annoyance, did it again, louder. This time she thought she saw his eyes flicker towards her, at least she hoped so. Taking a breath, she broke the smothering silence, “W-where are we going?”
For a few moments she thought he wasn’t going to answer, in which case she wasn’t sure she wouldn’t completely lose her shit and start screaming. Then his head turned to look at her, his eyes cold and emotionless. To her surprise, as his eyes came to rest on her, that coldness defrosted slightly, his features seeming to soften.
“A random system that was a two day jump away,” he said, finally. She blinked, waiting for any further explanation, but he fell silent again, though she thought for a moment she saw a trace of warmth in his eyes when she took an exasperated, fretful breath.
“Why?”
He leaned back and rested his head against the back of his chair, closing his eyes, “Because a multiday jump will make it harder for them to track where we went.”
She stared, frustrated, “Harder to— You’re running away from the First Order?”
Ren opened his eyes again, and his shoulders fell as he sighed. He looked… sad, lost. “I guess so.”
He guessed so? She shook her head, still utterly confused, “Why?” Ren didn’t respond and she threw herself against the back of her chair in frustration, glaring up at the ceiling. When she looked back at Ren again he was looking at her, a small, amused smile on his face.
“What?!” she snapped, ready to lunge at him and attempt to throttle him, suppressed or not.
His smile widened ever so slightly before he looked away, “You’re cute when you’re angry.”
Cute when she was angry?! She suppressed a snarl, drawing a shaky breath before pressing him again. “Are you defecting to the Resistance?” she asked, leaning forward.
Ren let out a single, incredulous laugh, “No.”
“Am I your prisoner?” she asked, glaring at him.
“No.” His eyes narrowed in annoyance and she couldn’t be happier that she’d irritated him. “If you want to leave when we drop out of hyperspace, I won’t stop you.” He looked down again, looking almost—sad. “Though you might want to wait till the suppressants fully wear off another few days after that.”
“So this was an… escape?” He just shrugged, closing his eyes again, pissing her off some more. “What are you going to do if you’re just letting me go?”
“Hopefully avoid getting captured,” he said, dryly, eyes closed.
Her mind whirled, trying to process everything. Leaning forward, she began earnestly, “You would be an asset to the Resistance.”
“Assuming they wouldn’t execute me on the spot, I’m sure I would,” he said, agreeably.
“They wouldn’t, you’re mother—”
Ren’s eyes snapped open, voice lowering to a growl, “No.”
“But—”
He sat up, leaning forward and dangling his long arms between his knees, “They’re terrorists, Rey. I have no intention of joining terrorists.”
She hissed angrily through her teeth. This was one of the points he would make during their debates in her cell while she ate, and it never failed to piss her off as he defended First Order tactics while demonizing the Resistance as the aggressors. “If you still believe in what the First Order stands for, why are you running?”
Ren stiffened, looking down at his hands, eyes losing the spark that was in them a moment before. He was going to shut down again and fall silent she realized, so she leaned forward, demanding, “Tell me why?!”
His eyes flicked up to look at her through his eyelashes, “Snoke was going to kill you.”
She blinked at him, not surprised at all. There wasn’t a scenario that had occurred to her in how her meeting with the Supreme Leader was going to play out that hadn’t included her death. It didn’t answer her question. Raising her eyebrows at him, she opened her hands to signal that she wanted something more than that.
Rolling his eyes, Ren climbed to his feet, standing next to her chair and looking down at her, “I didn’t want you to die,” he said before turning and walking out of the cockpit.
Fuck.
The kids. The gods damned kids. How the hell had they ended up here with Ren?
He had his blaster leveled at Ren, who had shoved the children behind him to shield them, puffed out like a wild Bantha ready to charge. A blaster hung from the man’s shoulder, but he made no move towards it yet. The suppression cuffs were gone, but the silver glint around the bastard’s neck confirmed Ren was still wearing the force suppression collar.
Well, that and the fact that he was still breathing, cause if Ren had slipped all his suppression restraints, he was pretty sure he’d have been dead already. Slammed into a wall, choked, maybe have his neck snapped. Yeah, he knew what Ren was capable of with his powers intact.
Which was why he had to go through with this. If he’d found Ren alone there’d have been no hesitation. Just a quick squeeze of the trigger and the debt Ren owed for every innocent he’d killed, every person he’d tortured, would come due and be paid in full. No one would see or have to know. Maybe he could even keep the truth hidden from Rey. Maybe not. Either way, she’d be better off this way, even if she couldn’t see it.
The base rattled, sending dust and small debris raining to the ground. Reminding him there wasn’t a lot of time. It didn’t take much to deduce that a ground invasion was imminent. Maybe coming for Ren. Maybe for prisoners. Maybe to find information. Didn’t really matter. There was something down here the Order wanted, otherwise this entire base would be a smoking crater by now.
He’d come to put an end to Ren, and he had to fight the urge to pull the trigger. Put the mad ack dog down, grab those kids and get the hell out of here.
Except they probably wouldn’t be too keen on coming with him once he blew their father’s head off in front of them. No, he had to get them out of here first. Somehow.
Licking his lips, he leaned to his comlink, “This is Admiral Dameron, I need security backup in sector 7g.”
Silence, no reply. Not a good sign that anyone was left to hear him. He kept his expression neutral, Ren didn’t need to know that. As far as that asshole needed to know, a full security detail was headed this way to apprehend him.
The man’s hand twitched towards his blaster. He raised his own slightly, tightening his grip, “Yeah, just give me that reason. I want the excuse.”
Ren’s eyes narrowed, but his hand dropped back down to his side. The blew air out of his nose angrily, once again looking like a pissed bantha bull. A second later the man shrugged the blaster strap from his shoulder so the weapon clattered to the floor.
Before he could ask Ren gave the blaster a kick so it skidded across the floor, coming to a rest maybe half of the way between them. Ren glared, head cocking at him almost questioningly. A small head peered around Ren’s hip to look at him, brown eyes wide and frightened. The boy, the one that looked more like Rey than Ren. His sister’s head followed, hazel eyes framed by black hair, glaring at him accusingly. The boy looked frightened. The girl… she just looked pissed. Really pissed.
It took Ren a second to realize his gaze had shifted. With an angry growl, Ren move once again be between his line of sight to the kids, shielding them. His teeth gritted together, like he was a danger to them. Like he was the monster.
Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to calm down, “Get down on your knees and put your hands on your head. And then I want the kids to come over here to me.”
Ren’s nostrils flared, “No.”
He licked his lips, “You want them to be safe, don’t you? They aren’t gonna be safe here.” As if to emphasize his point, the base rattled hard around them. “Send them over. I’ll send them ahead to meet the security detail that’s coming and someone will get them down to an evacuation transport.” Ren’s eyes narrowed and head tilted in a way that made him think he was contemplating. The man wanted to keep his kids safe. He’d send them ahead out of sight to wait for the non-existent security detail and gather them once Ren had his unfortunate demise while resisting being taken back into custody. They wouldn’t need to know what happened.
Ren flicked his eyes down and then closed them, thinking, maybe weighing his nonexistent options. When those dark eyes opened again, he saw resignation in them even before Ren started to nod and make to lower himself to his knees.
The kids’ eyes darted between him and their father, now kneeling in front of them.
“You two come over here, now,” he ordered.
They looked at each other but didn’t move. He let out an annoyed huff, walking over cautiously. “You’ll see your father again later,” he lied smoothly, voice gentle. “Right now you need to get to your grandma so we can keep you safe and get you out of here.”
The boy’s lips trembled and the girl narrowed eyes. She grabbed her father’s shirtsleeve at the shoulder, as if to anchor herself to him, her other arm wrapping around her brother. Like she was trying to tether all three of the together.
Ren, looked down, face contorting for a second before he turned his head and kissed the small hand, voice quiet and not entirely steady, “Go. Do what he says. I’ll, I’ll see you again soon. I—I promise.”
No, Ren wouldn’t, not that he was going to contradict that reassurance. If it got the kids out of here so he could get this over with and proceed to get them to safety. He had a feeling Ren knew this too, knew what was coming once the kids were gone.
The base took a hard hit, closer to them now. Chunks of debris fell from the ceiling. Fuck, he had to get this over with before the building started collapsing on them.
“No,” the girl hissed, her brother glancing back at her, looking unsure in what to do.
He let out an exasperated huff, shifting the blaster to one hand and reaching out to grab the boy and pull him over and away from his father. The boy seemed like the safer option. He was unsure, afraid. The girl was just a small ball of rage, grabbing her seemed like it would be akin to shoving your hand into a rabid correllian hound’s mouth.
But as his hand wrapped around the kid’s wrist, he felt something, a jolt almost, and the kid went rigid, eyes widening. He had a brief moment to register the brown eyes flashing with anger and then boy’s shriek of rage and fear before he was sent flying backwards, crashing into the wall hard enough to make his vision go briefly white.
“He’s a liar he’s going to kill you daddy he wants to kill you,” the kid was babbling, hysterically. How the fuck?
Then he saw Ren move, lunging towards the blaster still sitting on the floor. Running purely on adrenaline, he launched himself away from the wall, skidding on the floor to grab the rifle a split second before Ren’s hands wrapped around it, snarling as the two of them wrestled for control of the weapon.
He had really expected Rey to not even wait for the chemical suppressants to wear off. No, he had been sure once they broke from hyperspace she’d be gone, and he’d be alone to face the consequences of his impulsive actions after his holo conference with Snoke. A holo conference that made it clear what Rey’s fate would be.
We could turn her, he had argued. She could be a servant, a tool to Snoke’s will.
Snoke had scoffed, “Another time, perhaps I would have been able to make use of her. Now? I have no need.” Those beady blue eyes and stared through him as Snoke smirked, “I’m sure that’s of no bother to you. Why would you, heir to Vader, care about some junkyard rat from Jakku? This girl is nothing. And you will dispose of her once I take anything useful from her mind.”
Nothing. Yes, Rey was nothing, a nothing girl from a nowhere sandball. Nothing. It should be simple, whether she lived or died should be meaningless to him.
Except it wasn’t.
So he had taken her and ran, ran from everything he believed in. Because while his faith in Snoke had waned, his faith in the need for a firm hand to rule the galaxy and maintain order hadn’t. He’d grown up seeing the inefficiency and utter uselessness of the Republic. Politicians were liars who drugged the populace with false promises while they padded their pockets with credits at the expense of those they were supposed to serve. He had believed it was his destiny to fix that, to restore order and peace to the galaxy, even if that peace came from the threat of a blaster.
Days went by, the suppressants wore off, but Rey didn’t leave. He thought maybe she was hoping to try to turn him, get him to agree to return with her to the Resistance. She was naive enough to try, silly girl that she was. But as time passed, she never brought it up again.
It was about three weeks later that they were in some backwater port in the rim the first time an attempt was made to kill one of them. A bounty hunter. He had been distracted, wandering the pathetic excuse for a market, mind churning as he contemplated the mess he’d gotten himself into. He hadn’t seen the Rodian coming.
Rey did, she had screamed “Ren!” as she deflected the blaster bolt that had been shot at his back. He had spun, freezing the bounty hunter in place, storming over and knocking the blaster from the Rodian’s hand before tearing through his mind to find out that the First Order now had a six figure bounty on his and Rey’s heads.
He’d tried to kill the scum afterwards, but Rey had stopped him, pleading with him that it was not necessary. He still should have, but she had just saved his life, and had said please. So he had left the Rodian breathing but unconscious and they fled.
Back on the shuttle, he had felt a moment of panic as he considered that this might have been what she was waiting for. He had saved her life, now she had saved his. If she was staying with him out of some feeling of needing to pay him back for him saving her, they were now even. Would this be it then? Would the tether holding her to him break and she’d leave?
Once they were in hyperspace, they had gone down to the passenger compartment on the lower deck, which had become their main living space, the two of them sleeping at night on the narrow uncomfortable couches and benches. Rey paced the length of the room before turning to face him with a look of determination on her face. This was it, he had thought, she was going to tell him that she would be leaving at the next port.
“We need a new shuttle.”
He blinked. We? Did she say we?
“An upsilon class shuttle is too distinctive. It screams First Order,” she went on. “Every bounty hunter is going to be watching ports for this thing. Maybe we could sell it and buy something more common, something that’ll blend in?”
We again, as in her and him. She still wasn’t leaving.
Why?
He stood up suddenly. Suddenly enough that Rey took a startled step back. She took another as he walked towards her, staring at her intensely.
“W— what are you doing?” she asked as she watched him warily.
“Why are you still here?”
She blinked, “What… do you mean?”
“You could have gone weeks ago,” he murmured. “Gone back to your—” he caught himself before he called them her terrorist friends. Getting her angry and defensive wasn’t going to help him get an honest answer. “Gone back to the Resistance… to your—friends.”
Rey looked away from him, shrugging, “Do you want me to leave?” Trying to sound indifferent and failing miserably.
“No. I want to know why,” he pressed, watching her jaw work as she looked anywhere but at him. “ Why ?”
Her eyes shot to him, glaring, “Why did you save me?”
He stiffened, “I told you.”
“You said you didn’t want me to die. Why?” Her hazel eyes were burning hole through him, burning with anger and frustration and… something else.
“Because I didn’t,” he gritted out.
“And maybe I just didn’t want to leave yet!” she snapped as he stepped closer, trying to swallow the lump out of his throat. He could feel the force almost sparking between them as Rey’s tongue darted out nervously to wet her lips.
He wasn't sure if he was the one who kissed her or if she was the one that kissed him. Maybe they both moved at the same time. It didn’t really matter. They had tangled together aggressively with rough kisses and bruising love bites. The rational part of his mind drowned out under the haze of lust and the desperate need to keep feeling more of her.
It wasn’t till he was straddling her on one of the narrow couches, trying to tug her tunic off, that she pulled back, eyes wide and chest heaving, her mind starting to process what she was doing. His chest had tightened, looking down and closing his eyes so he wouldn’t have to see the dawning horror at what she was doing in hers.
“You’re beautiful,” he blurted out like an idiot. Desperate to say something, anything, that might keep her this close to him at least a few moments longer. When he opened his eyes he saw her watching him, brow draw in confusion.
“I—I’ve wanted you since I first saw you on Takadona,” he continued, for some reason unable to stop from making this hole he was digging for himself deeper. “He was going to have me kill you. Said you were no one, nothing. But you’re not. Not to me. I couldn’t…”
He looked down and closed his eyes again, waiting for her to pull away from him and flee.
Instead her fingers threaded through his hair. He snapped his eyes open find her staring up at him, eyes wet.
“I don’t know,” she said, softly. He blinked at her in confusion, and she shook her head. “Why I’m staying. I.. I don’t know,” she explained, before leaning up and pressing her lips gently against his.
The main stairwell was a larger version of the ventilation shaft, a durasteel column slicing through the levels of the base. The stairs were metal grating that wrapped it’s way down the walls of the shaft downward, riveted to the walls. The center of the shaft was open, an endless drop on the other side of the battered railing on the inside of the stairs.
There was no cover. That open center meant you could lean over and clearly see someone on those stairs a good fifteen levels down. Which meant their best bet was to move quickly and add as much distance as possible. The metal clanged and creaked under their footsteps and groaned menacingly now and again. It echoed through the shaft, most likely alerting the First Order troops where they were better than any alarm could.
She tried not to think about that, tried to focus on running. On getting down far enough that they’d be harder targets when the storm troopers inevitably burst into the stairwell. Hopefully avoid getting shot, somehow make it to the hanger, find a ship—if there were any ships—and get the hell out without getting killed.
Best to avoid thinking about what a shitty plan this was.
They were nine levels down when the blaster fire erupted around them, ricocheting off the durasteel, rattling the already rickety stairs. They kept running, her leading, Pava following on her heels. The metal stairs vibrating now with the added force of the troopers charging after them.
Twenty three levels down a searing pain shot through her upper arm, a blaster bolt having grazed it, leaving a jagged, cauterized wound. She tripped and would have fallen if Pava hadn’t managed to grab her shirt. They kept running, but the troopers were closer now.
They were nearly thirty levels down when the explosion knocked her off her feet, sending her rolling down to the next landing as the metal groaned and the stairs she had just been on tore away from some of their supports and collapsed, sending Pava cartwheeling over the side.
Acting on instinct, she dove, dropping down below the railing of the landing to snag Pava’s wrist as she fell past. Rey’s injured arm screamed at her as Pava swung over the empty center of the shaft, Pava’s other arm scrabbling to grab on to Rey’s arm.
She struggled to pull her up as the clang of the trooper’s boots on the stairs grew louder and a blaster bolt ricocheted off the railing above her.
Pava stared up, wide eyed, before glancing up towards the approaching troopers, then at the door that opened to the hanger bay. Pava’s fingers released their grip on her arm.
“Let me drop and get out of here before it’s too late,” Pava said, strangely calm.
She blinked, mind sluggish to process what was just said, “The fuck? No!”
“There’s no time for this. Idiots just put a barricade between them and us with that grenade blowing up the stairs. But you’re a sitting duck if you don’t get off this stairwell.”
“Not without you, Jess,” she growled, harnessing the force for strength and pulling back, dragging Pava up inch by inch as blaster fire intensified around them. Pava grabbed at the metal floor of the landing as she got close enough, finally managing to get enough of a grip to help her pull her up.
WIth one final heave, the two of them landed in a heap. She grabbed Pava and rolled as a blaster bolt hit right where they had both landed a second before.
Foot falls came skidding to a halt as the troopers reached the section of stairs they had managed to destroy.
“HOLD IT!” a voice barked through a stormtrooper's helmet speaker. Not that either she or Pava paid any heed as they dove through the door to the hanger level, slamming a hand on the control panel to close the door just in time to block the new barrage of blaster fire.
She rose to her feet, turning to squint through the darkness of the hangar. It was mostly empty, but a few ancient transports were scattered across the open space.
Pava was climbing to her feet, “There are ships, so I guess the question is if they fly and have fuel.”
Rey nodded, still breathing hard from exertion, “I think they will. They will and we’re going to get the fuck out of here.”
Suppressed or not, Ren was strong. Really strong. The last few years playing farmer with Rey on that moon hadn’t done anything to weaken the fucking bantha bull of a man, which he was proving over and over as they wrestled over the blaster. Neither of them were willing to release their hold on the weapon, turning the struggle into a pissing match of brute strength with jabs from elbows and knees thrown in for a good measure. He was already bleeding from a elbow Ren had landed to his mouth. Desperation was a good motivator though, and somehow even after that blow made his entire head ring, he’d managed to keep his hold on the weapon.
The kids had skittered back in fear and were now watching from a bit of a distance, which was good, he thought almost idly as Ren spun the two of them and slammed him hip first into the wall. Safer for them to stay out of the way. And given the little fact that someone had force thrown him into a wall and it wasn’t Ren, maybe safer for him that they weren’t trying to help their father.
Retrospect, he probably should have insisted they had a suppression cuff put on each of them. Damned if Rey or Leia didn’t like it.
The building rattled hard around them, the Order was either increasing the potency of its attack or targeting closer to their current location. Ren managed to lift him off the floor and slam into the wall again, knocking the air out of his lungs. He used the opportunity to use the wall as leverage as he brought his legs up and planted both feet into Ren’s stomach. The man grunted and stumbled back a step, which was a reaction, at least, though not much of one.
With all honesty, he wasn’t liking his chances here. Ren was throwing him around like a rag doll as he kept his grip on that blaster like his life depended on it. Which he was pretty sure it did. Gods knew if he managed to get it away from Ren he was going to shoot first and think about it later. He could only expect that Ren would do the same.
Then the building rocked hard enough to send them stumbling into the wall as chucks of duracrete fell from the ceiling. One of the kids cried out, either in pain or fear, and Ren’s head snapped their direction, attention immediately diverting towards them.
It was an opportunity. He lunged forward and slammed his elbow into Ren’s throat while simaltaniously slamming his knee into the man’s stomach. Ren was caught by surprise, his grip on the blaster loosening just enough. He threw himself back away from Ren with as much force as he could muster, wrenching the weapon out of the man’s grip even as the force of his action sent him stumbling back where he landed sprawling.
There was no time to waste, he leapt to his feet, leveling the blaster and opening fire, sending a volley of bolts at Ren. Somewhere beyond the pounding of his own blood in his hears he heard one, or maybe both, of the kids shriek and he for a split second he felt a pang of guilt.
It was only a split second because he quickly had other things to worry about, like how Ren was throwing backwards out of the way of the bolts by nothing at all, and how the air around him suddenly felt… thick, heavy. Or how the blaster in his hands was starting to vibrate as if it was being put under some kind of extreme stress, getting hot, painfully hot, in his grip.
He opened his hands and let the blaster fall, struggling against the pressure that was suddenly being exerted on him to take even a few steps back as the blaster let out an angry whine and exploded in a blinding flash of green light, knocking him backwards. His head cracked against the floor and his vision briefly blacked out.
Groaning, he pushed himself up to see one of the kids— the boy— kneeling next to Ren who was dragging himself up onto his knees. The girl was standing between them and him, rigid with her fists clenched at her sides, her wet hazel eyes blazing at him as she took a step towards him.
The heaviness of the air around him returned and he felt it getting hard to draw in a breath. He gasped as the girl moved closer, flashing her teeth at him like a feral loth cat.
“You tried to kill my daddy,” she hissed.
“SKYE!” Ren’s voice. The man was shouting. At least he thought Ren was, it was getting kind of hard to hear, like the sound wasn’t getting to his ears quite right. “Skye! Get over here now!”
I’m about to get killed by a five year old, he marveled as she stepped closer, looking like some sort of tiny, vengeful demon as she glared at him, eyes full of anger and tears.
“You’re a bad man!” she said, accusingly.
He wheezed, trying to say something, but the pressure was increasing around him to the point he couldn’t open his mouth. What would he say, anyway? That her father was the bad man and he was just giving him what he deserved? Probably not something that would go over well.
“Skye! Now!” Ren was yelling, “Come here now! We have to go!”
The shuttle was dilapidated garbage, it had probably been left there by the Resistance when they had to abandon this base however many years ago that it fell. Gods knew how long it had been since it flew. As she squinted through the access port at the power modulators she winced and corrected her previous assessment—this piece of junk had probably been left here by whoever had control of this base before the Resistance got control over it. The Resistance gave all of their ships at least basic maintenance, something that this ship didn’t look like it ever had.
“Rey?”
Unfortunately, of their options of the few ships abandoned in this hangar, this one was probably the best. She stood on tiptoes a second to peer downward through the access port, before dropping back down and glancing at Pava. “There’s another access port under that console there, could you open it?”
Pava gave her a quizzical look but dropped down and pulled the panel cover off, “I’m not sure if I like our chances in this thing,” she said as she dropped the panel cover to the floor. “And we don’t have a lot of time before they’re going to blast their way in from the stairs or the main bay door.”
“It’ll fly,” she answered in a clipped tone, bending over and picking up the access port cover she’d dropped when she pulled it off to look at the power converters. It would fly because it was going to have to, and if it didn't want to she'd find a way to make it. That was what she was good at, anyway, fixing broken things.
Plus, they didn’t have any other options. “Would you mind coming over here by me?” Pava glanced at her, brows rising in confusion. She waved her over impatiently.
“What are you—” Pava started as she walked over.
The rest of the question was cut off as she slammed the panel cover into the wall repeated, the noise echoing loudly throughout the small shuttle. Pava jumped, and from inside the panel skittering noise started, and less than a second later five gizkas bolted from the open access port below the console and rushed down the open ramp into the hangar bay.
She dropped the panel to the floor with a clatter before l reaching into the panel to adjust some wires. They’d been chewed but still seemed mostly intact. When she was done she took a deep breath and threw the power breaker.
A low hum filled the shuttle and the lights flickered several times and then burned steady. Pava took a surprised step back, then walked to a console and began tapping.
“It’s got fuel, not a lot but enough for a short jump, and power cells haven’t bled out all their juice yet.” Pava shrugged at her, “Not sure if I like the idea of trying to breach the atmosphere in this rust bucket but—”
“Not like we got options,” she nodded in agreement. Reaching over pressing the button to seal the hatch.
“Skye! Now! Come here now! We have to go!”
He was stumbling to his feet with a hand on Solan’s shoulder and his eyes wide, staring towards where his daughter was looming over Dameron. Even with the suppression collar, he could feel the force sparking around her furiously as Dameron writhed and wheezed. She might not know how she was doing it, but she was still doing it with intention. She was going to kill him.
He couldn’t let that happen.
Not for Dameron’s sake. Dameron could die slowly and painfully and he’d be all the happier, but not by Skye’s hand. He wasn’t going to let his little girl kill at the age of five. She was too young to have blood on her hands.
No, he hand to stop this. Lurching, he took a staggering few step towards them.
But that was as far as he got before an explosion blasted the wall inward and brought the ceiling raining down in chunks. He grabbed Solan and curled around him to shield the boy with his own body.
When the it stilled, he shoved himself up to blink through the dust where Skye had been. A wall of debris was between him and where his daughter had last been.
“Skye!” he yelled, an edge of panic to his voice. “Can you hear me?!”
Nothing. His lips quivered. She was okay. She had to be okay.
The heavy footfalls of boots marching in step caused him to freeze. He turned to see that a gaping hole had been carved through the base, leading to the outside. A battalion of stormtroopers were marching in towards him. He shoved Solan behind him, getting to his knees as the troopers bore down on him, blasters drawn.
He closed his eyes tight, trying to figure out what to do, but his mind didn’t want to work, and his options were nonexistent. Slowly, he raised his hands up as the troopers surrounded them, staring down, doing his best to keep Solan behind him.
“Commander Ren,” a familiar voice lilted, as a flash of silver moved in his peripheral vision. Slowly he tilted his head up to stare at the silver helmet. “So good to have you back,” Phasma added, mockingly. He didn’t answer, just narrowed his eyes and shifted to block Solan from her line of sight when he saw her head tilt ever so slightly towards his boy.
The stormtroopers in front of him began to part suddenly and a quick rapid click of heels on the duracrete floor echoed down to him.
“Outer edges of the base. Outer edges. Structural integrity is to remain intact . I swear Canady is utterly incompetent,” a snide voice, all too familiar even after this time, spoke. His hands clenched into fists as he looked past Phasma to see Hux stepping through parted center of the stormtroopers. The General’s eyes fell on him and the man seemed to pull back slightly, pulling himself up straighter, cold blue eyes scanning Ren from head to foot and then back up again.
“Ren,” Hux’s voice was smooth and full of mirth.
He glared back at the man, who just smirked at him, eyes glancing down at his neck and the silver collar encircling it.
“Collared like the dog that you are,” Hux continued, smirk morphing into a wolfish grin. “How fitting.”
He groaned, pulling himself to his knees amid the debris and rubble.
Fuck.
A wall of rubble rose next to him where the ceiling had collapsed, blockading the corridor. He glanced over his shoulder and saw the other direction was still open.
The direction of the shuttle bay. He stumbled to his feet, remembering… fighting with Ren, the blaster exploding, the girl advancing on him like some kind of tiny monster. Then the explosion and blackness.
The hallway seemed to spin and he pressed his hands against his head. Fuck. Fuck, fuck. Fuck.
Fucked this up good, Dameron, he thought to himself, running a hand through his sweat and dust encrusted hair.
He looked around, not seeing Ren. The man might be on the other side of this rubble, or maybe buried under it, or maybe just woke up first and ran. Okay, fine. He could look on the bright side, he was alive, at least for a little bit longer.
Starting to take a few stumbling steps, he froze as he caught sight of something in from the corner of his eye. Turning slowly, he stared at the tiny, dust covered hand laying amid, and then followed it to the where the little girl lay. Swallowing, he walked over before carefully crouching down next to her.
She had a head wound, bleeding, but her chest was moving. Kid was alive.
Kid was going to kill you, what, your just going to take her with you so she can finish the job when she wakes up? A voice in his head that sounded strangely like Kelen scoffed at him.
And it was right, wasn’t it? Right now what he had to do was turn and head down that hallway and find a way off this base. Trying to save Kylo Ren’s kid was going to slow him down and probably just get both of them killed. And she nearly killed him. There was no reason to think she wouldn’t try again.
He stood, taking a step back.
The girl shifted, still unconscious, curling in on herself and whimpering softly in pain. Tiny and helpless and pitiful.
Every muscle in his body stiffened, feeling suddenly sick with himself.
She was just a kid, a baby really. Was he really going to leave her to die here? Leave Rey’s kid?
The fuck was wrong with him?
He stumbled forward again, crouching down and picking her up. She whimpered again as he carefully held her against his chest. “All right. Let’s just hope you don’t wake up and kill me before we get the hell out of here,” he muttered, starting down the hallway. “And let’s hope there’s a ship or two left, or we’re fucked anyway.”
Notes:
Ohhh boy, eh? I'm starting to worry that I'm abusing my poor readers of this story between the non stop angst and tension and now constant cliff hangers.
I rather enjoyed briefly letting Poe get the shit kicked out of him. God knows I still want to throat punch him though. And yeah, you fucked things up really good Dameron, you asshole.
Thank you all for the comments and kudos and kind words for this fic despite the fact that I keep tormenting you :)
Chapter 14
Summary:
He had to admit there were few moments in his life that had filled him with such delight as having Kylo Ren at his mercy. The man had been a constant thorn in his side before Ren had run away from the Order, a brutish thug favored by the Supreme Leader and a constant threat to his power. After Ren absconded with the Jedi prisoner, the man had become the albatross hung around his neck. His failure to apprehend Ren and the Jedi bitch had become a failure the Supreme Leader refused to let him forget.
Now the source of his humiliation and failures was helpless at his feet, wearing a force collar no less. The idea that Ren had allowed himself been caught and rendered so humiliatingly helpless by a bunch of pathetic rebels was just… delightful.
Really, if they managed to capture any of the Resistance leadership alive, he would be sure to thank them for this before they were summarily executed.
Notes:
*waves* Hey! I'm still alive! And I have an update!
So I'm being bad and not editing this because it's almost 1am and I have to work tomorrow, so I apologize for any issues. Probably will ninja edit it once I have some time.
Sorry for the wait between updates. Things have been crazy lately and there hasn't been much writing time.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
He had to admit there were few moments in his life that had filled him with such delight as having Kylo Ren at his mercy. The man had been a constant thorn in his side before Ren had run away from the Order, a brutish thug favored by the Supreme Leader and a constant threat to his power. After Ren absconded with the Jedi prisoner, the man had become the albatross hung around his neck. His failure to apprehend Ren and the Jedi bitch had become a failure the Supreme Leader refused to let him forget.
Now the source of his humiliation and failures was helpless at his feet, wearing a force collar no less. The idea that Ren had allowed himself been caught and rendered so humiliatingly helpless by a bunch of pathetic rebels was just… delightful.
Really, if they managed to capture any of the Resistance leadership alive, he would be sure to thank them for this before they were summarily executed.
Ren glared at him and shifted slightly, trying to keep the boy behind him shielded from their view. It was an action that was so ridiculously futile that he nearly laughed out loud. Instead he grinned stepping to the side to get a view of the boy again, relishing at how Ren’s eyes flashed with rage and just a hint of fear.
“This must be the boy Snoke wants,” he drawled, smile widening as the fear in Ren’s eyes grew. He would stand here and just drink that fear and savor it, but he did have to keep his head. Snoke had mentioned a girl too, and the Supreme Leader wanted her too.
Phasma must have been keyed into his enjoying the situation too much, as she opted to give voice to those mental reminders he’d just been giving himself, “There’s a third to still acquire, General Hux?”
Yes, yes. Just rain on his petty revenge parade, Major Phasma.
“Where’s the girl?” he asked Ren, smile falling off his face.
Ren flashed his teeth and said nothing, but the boy’s head turned to look at the wall of debris from the building’s partial collapse barricading the hallway. He cocked his head, following the gaze, and huffed. “I am going to have Canady’s head if one of our targets was killed due to his inability to target as ordered.”
Something akin to panic flashed across Ren’s features as the man cast a glance at the debris. His mirth at Ren’s obvious distress was a good distraction from worrying about Snoke’s displeasure at only getting two of the three targets, though he suspected Snoke would be lenient as long as he had Ren and the boy to present to him.
“She’s not dead,” a small voice mumbled.
The boy had spoken it from where he’d sidled up against Ren’s back. Presumably to Ren, perhaps trying to reassure his father. It wasn't as if there was a way for the boy to know if the girl was alive or dead.
He looked at the boy properly for the first time. There might be a bit of his father in his features, but not much. No, his features were more refined, more delicate, with wide, expressive brown eyes that peered darting, terrified, glances at the stormtroopers before burying his face against Ren’s back.
There was a softness in his face, an openness, one that he’d seen in the more timid stormtrooper recruits. The ones that would be chewed up and spat out by the program… unless someone took a special interest in them to give them the attention and encouragement that they needed.
Whatever Snoke wanted with the boy, he doubted this one had the fortitude to survive it, assuming the intentions weren’t just kill them outright in front of Ren to punish the man for his betrayals.
“General?” Phasma queried, breaking the silence that he’d let linger too long.
He drew his blaster, idly watching Ren tense and try to push the boy further behind him as he adjusted the settings. They needed to take Ren and the boy into custody and break through the wall of debris to search for the girl. It would be most efficient, and probably most kind of the boy, to simply stun Ren first then take them both away. If they tried to take the boy while Ren was still conscious, he was sure to try to fight, prolong the whole ordeal
But it would also spare Ren the torment of seeing his boy dragged away.
And tormenting Ren really was an indulgence he couldn’t deny himself.
He smiled down at Ren as he set the blaster to its lowest stun setting. Far too low to actually knock out someone Ren’s size. But it would hurt like a bitch and knock the man flat each time he got hit.
“Take the boy,” he ordered.
Ren let out a snarl and leapt to his feet, “NO!”
He squeezed the trigger, still smiling as he watched Ren collapse with a yelp and writhe in pain on the ground. The boy let out a panicked shriek and skittered backwards, bursting into tears. He sighed, feeling a pang of pity towards the little guy.
Not enough to make him feel the need to stop with Ren’s torment, though enough to feel just a touch bad about it.
A small touch.
He nodded towards the boy, and Phasma glanced at two of her troopers, who quickly began to walk forward towards the boy. Ren lurched, trying to push himself up.
So he shot him twice in a row, cocking his head and feeling delight as Ren’s chin smashed into the floor, convulsing for a moment.
“You might want to stay down, Ren,” he drawled. “The troopers will be with you in a moment.”
“Going… to… kill you. Bastard,” Ren panted as he tried to get onto his knees.
“Are you now?” He shot Ren again, in the shoulder, and raised his eyebrows as he watched the man writhe, “Good luck with that.”
One of the troopers grabbed the boy by the arm, dragging him to his feet. The boy shrieked, panicking and pulling back. Ren tried to get up again, earning him another stun bolt.
Looking down at Ren, he only saw the stormtroopers flying back in his peripheral vision. But he felt the air seem to shift and move with the force of it. His head shot up and he saw the boy skittering backwards, crying hysterically. A line of troopers had been knocked onto their backs, and the two that had been taking the boy were pushing themselves upright, dazed.
Ren took the distraction and tried to lunge at his feet. He swore, aiming and firing three stun bolts into the man’s back before looking up again. The troopers still on their feet had their blasters at ready, but were looking around in confusion, trying to figure out where the invisible force that attacked them had come from.
What the hell—
His eyes drifted to the boy, now pressed up against the wall of debris, sobbing.
Oh. Oh.
Well that would explain Snoke’s interest, wouldn’t it? And it was logical, really, being both parents were force users.
It also was a bit of a disconcerting development, was Snoke’s intent to train the children to step into the role their father had served before? Powerful, dangerous, and potential threats to his own future dreams of holding the reins of the Order?
He glanced at the boy’s face, thinking about the stormtrooper recruits that the boy reminded him of. It was useful to take the time to mentor and encourage them, helping them survive and thrive within the program. In doing so he’d gained dozens of soldiers now that we’re intensely loyal to him, more so than to the First Order as a whole. He’d been able to use them many times over the years to help eliminate political threats to his own power.
Hmm.
Nudging the stun setting higher, shot Ren once more, knocking the man out, before taking a few steps towards the hysterical child. Cocking his head, he tried to estimate the boy’s weight, adjusting the stun setting back down. Stunning children was difficult. He needed to hit him hard enough to knock him out, but not so hard that the kid would be damaged.
“Don’t worry,” he spoke calmly, as he smiled gently at the boy. “Everything is going to be all right,” he lied, and fired.
Even before they left the atmosphere she knew something wasn’t right.
As the shuttle rattled and struggled in Aclo’s storms and rough winds, she waited, anxiously, for the First Order TIEs to appear on her her sensor readings. But they never did, and that made no sense. Once their shuttle made it to space, all they needed to do was clear the gravity well of the planet and then jump into hyperspace. That made an atmospheric dogfight worth the risk to the fighters, even in an atmosphere as shitty as Aclo’s.
“I’m going to prep the jump coordinates,” Jess spoke. She glanced over and saw similar apprehension in Jess’ brown eyes. “We’re going to need to get out of here in a hurry.”
She nodded and throttled the shuttle to an escape velocity, closing her eyes for a second before taking a steadying breath. They were going to do this. She was going to make it home to her man and her babies and if anyone got between them she was going to unleash the nine levels of hell onto them.
The shuttle shook hard around them as it broke through Aclo’s hold. Free from the planet, the ship should have stabilized, flight smoothing out. Instead the shuttle lurched and bucked, forcing her to strain to keep it under control.
“—the fuck?!” Jess shouted next to her.
Sensor readings were going berserk, she stared down at the console, trying to make sense of the readings. She glanced over at Jess to find the woman was staring out the viewport with a look of bewildered horror.
Her eyes followed Jess’ gaze, and her heart skipped.
Space was… was… wrong.
That was the only word her mind could supply to describe the strange rippling distortions around them marked with occasional small waves of blue light that was the same color of hyperspace. Debris filled the area, seeming to roll and spin oddly amid the turbulence.
A hunk of durasteel hit an eddy and was suddenly flung their direction. Rey hit the thrusters and banked to port, but they moved slowly, as if they were stuck in some kind of current, the shuttle rattling and bucking like an unbroken happabore. The made it out of the way, just barely.
What the hell could do something like this? Who could do something like this? Was it permanent? Would this area of space be forever marred?
“There’s no way we’re going to be able to calculate a jump from this…” Jess’ voice shook. “Navigation sensors are completely confused.” Rey cast her a sideways glance as and the woman shook her head, “I’m pretty sure that’s the remains of the Resistance fleet, they were waiting for our signal in hyperspace.”
She nodded, feeling numb as she began to navigate the shuttle on the edge of the debris field. Everything was in unpredictable motion, it was worse than trying to navigate an asteroid field, at least asteroids weren’t defying the laws of physics.
“Oh shit.”
At Jess’ voice, Rey snapped her head up and looked outside the viewport.
Looming in the distance, moving their direction, was the distinct shape of a star destroyer.
His team had been the one to stumble on the old prison, a forgotten relic of the Empire. There were no records of it any of the archives, which, given the security features that they’d found here, was somewhat bizarre. If it had been small, or low security, maybe that could have been understandable, but this was big and had been given a lot of resources. Maybe it had been a black site, someplace for members of the military or governing hierarchies to vanish when they fell out of favor. He, Paige, Snap, and Jess had spent the first night of the few days they stayed to investigate and take inventory speculating on the why and the what of this place. They had camped on the dusty floors of one of the long, dark hallways, all of them deciding it was more comfortable out there than camping on one of the cots in the cells that had once housed unknown prisoners of unknown fates.
It had been not long after they’d lost Rey. Batuu had been a blow on many levels, with Skywalker still—off somewhere— and Rey captured by First Order. They lost their Jedi. They lost their friend. And their spies had told them she was alive and being held on the Finalizer. Finn had become obsessed with trying to find a way to free her. But the few attempts they made had been utter failures and cost them the lives of a dozen of their people, leaving command to refuse further attempts, much to Finn’s anguish. He had taken his friend’s side on it, pushing back against the brass. After all, Rey was one of their people, and they didn’t leave their own behind.
So they were reeling, and under heavy pressure. They had lost two bases within the span of two weeks, which led then Vice-Admiral Holdo to call for a small recon team to check out some different systems for potential new bases. He hadn’t been happy when he’d been tasked to lead what he viewed as a fairly common scouting mission, and he was fairly sure it had been to get him off their backs on questioning the decision to cease further attempts to break Rey free.
He’d went to Holdo and gotten in her face when she tried to tell him it was an crucially important mission— blah, blah, blah. He pushed back, and she’d rolled her eyes and said, “Follow your orders, Flyboy, before you find yourself demoted to Captain.”
It was ironic, maybe, that the discovery of what would be the salvation of the Resistance for years to come might have been due to the command trying to find a way to get Commander Dameron off their asses. In the years that followed, the prison turned base had become one of the few secure places for the Resistance. There were ups and downs— the confusion of Rey running off with Kylo Ren. Absolutely no one knew what to make of that and it had become a point of contention at the risk they posed, that she posed, depending on what their intentions were. Skywalker and returned to help, though his tendency of vanishing off for some kind of fucking self reflection when he was most needed continued. They made allies, they built up a coalition of allied worlds to stand up to the First Order, only to have those allied worlds slowly fall one by one as the First Order progressed in its expansion of territory.
The hallways of the base, littered with debris and deserted, reminded him of that first time they entered— walking through the darkened corridors, footsteps echoing through the empty space. His own were now echoing as he jogged his way through the halls. The alarm had stopped when the power generators had been taken out. The aerial bombardment had paused, leaving just silence as he made his way to the hanger, cradling the little girl in his arms.
Given the deserted state of the base, he could only assume most people had gotten out. Which was good and bad. Hopefully a majority got to safety, but it meant few if any transports were going to be left. Right now all he could hope was that there was something left for him to get out before it was too late.
He adjusted his grip on the girl, hoisting her a little higher in his arms. They were almost to the hangar. Just a little bit further—
An explosion echoed somewhere in the base. Smaller and localized, but still with enough force to cause the walls to rattle. Charges and a directional blast, probably. First Order invading force, blowing their way through a wall? Or maybe debris?
Didn’t matter really. What mattered was it was probably a sign that First Order troops were infiltrating the base. He upped his speed from a jog to a run, causing the little girl to shift and whimper in his arms. There wasn’t much time. Taking one final turn he rushed into the empty hangar bay.
The very empty hangar. His stomach sank. All the shuttles, all the bigger transports, all the fighters were gone. Turning, he squinted into the darkness, locking on to a few small shapes in the corner.
Courier transports, little puddle jumpers, three of them. They were tiny, one man transports, meant for short, quick jumps of no more than a day. He popped open the cockpit, frowning before gently setting the girl down in the space behind the single pilot’s seat. These things weren’t meant for more than one person, but the girl was small enough that she shouldn’t be too much of an added strain on the life support and fuel consumption.
At least he hoped not.
Running a hand through his hair, he took a breath. Wasn’t like there were other options. He started to climb in, but then stopped, glancing at the small emergency kit the transport was equipped with. Things had next to nothing in them, a small water and food ration, some bacta patches. Jumping back out he went to the other two Couriers and popped open the cockpits, leaning over to fumble the kits open an swiping out the contents, carrying them back to his transport, bacta patches slipping from his grip here and there and falling to the floor. The majority of it made it back to their transport, where he dropped the supplies onto the floor next to the girl.
Better than nothing.
Might as well be his mantra right now. Get the kriff out alive and worry about things like food and water and the fact that these fuckers had enough fuel for maybe an eighteen hour jump and there were no rendezvous points in that short of a range.
Shit.
He shook his head, climbing into the pilot seat, flipping switches with his thumbs and powering the tiny ship to life. Better than nothing, just keep repeating that, Poe.
Pressing the button to close the cockpit, he glanced over his shoulder at the girl.
“I don’t know, kid. Even if you don’t kill us both when you wake up, we’re kind of screwed here.” He shifted power to the thrusters and repulser lifts, the small ship hummed as it rose from the floor.
“But, given the circumstances, it’s better than nothing,” he said, flying the small ship out of the hangar bay doors.
“I’ll take the boy,” he said curtly to the stormtrooper who had picked the child up. Another two were dragging Ren’s unconscious body away, where he’d be secured in one of the transports to be returned to the Finalizer. And collar or not collar, he wanted Ren dosed with chemical suppressants.
Can’t be too careful, after all.
The white helmet tilted in surprise before offering the boy to him, “Yes, General.”
He took the child gently, glancing down at the boy’s face. Too soft, he thought, clucking to himself. The boy was much too soft, you could see it in the gentleness in his features.
Snoke would utterly destroy this boy, he was sure of that. Shatter him and rebuild him only to shatter him again. Repeating the process until the broken boy was the weapon Snoke wanted.
He clucked his tongue again, shaking his head.
“Sir?” Phasma asked and he looked up to find her watching him in a way that he thought might be curiosity. It was hard to tell for sure with Phasma, mask and all that, but somehow he knew he was being watched and studied.
Which wasn’t so surprising. Phasma was a rancor constantly sniffing for blood. She could be very useful, but she could also be very dangerous. He glanced at smoke and debris settling from where they had blasted through the rubble blocking their path. It was a risky move, the girl might have been on the other side and been killed, and of course, Snoke wanted the girl.
He, on the other hand, wasn’t sure he wanted Snoke to have her. It was a risky move, but adding the second child to the mix might make things more difficult moving forward. With Ren gone, he had become the next logical successor in the— unfortunate— scenario that the Supreme Leader died. Behind the scenes politically, he had been working to secure his position, along with identifying the factions and enemies that would oppose him. He knew who he could trust and who he would need to kill.
All it would take was Snoke’s death.
Snoke, unfortunately, seemed very insistent about continuing to live. There was enough disrest within the First Order ranks and dissatisfaction with the Supreme Leader that organizing a coup would be possible, though likely still futile. They would lose, he would be exposed, and likely everyone involved, including himself, would be executed.
So, for now, he had to be content to play the long game, and watch for an opportunity.
He glanced down at the boy in his arms.
Ren’s spawn were going to add a new wrinkle to the already complicated situation. A plan, a very vague and not entirely defined plan, had begun to develop once he realized the boy was a force user. Like the boys in the storm trooper program that would have been chewed up and spit out if he hadn’t given them the guiding hand of a mentor and friend, this boy would need a friend to help him get through the years to come.
Those stormtroopers he helped were more loyal to him than to the First Order, which he found very useful over the years.
It was a long game, but in five to ten years, how potent of a weapon would the boy be for Snoke?
What if that weapon’s ultimate loyalty was not for the Supreme Leader but instead for the person who showed him kindness?
Hm. There was much to think about still, but potential. Oh yes, there was potential.
But it would be easier if it was just the boy. If he and his sister were together, they would have each other and not need someone quite as badly. No, it would be better if it was only one. Simpler.
He glanced at Phasma, already hoping the girl was either dead or gone. Snoke would be displeased, but he’d have the boy, he’d have Ren. Not having the girl would raise Snoke’s ire, but not enough that it wouldn’t be forgivable.
“Search the base for the girl. I’ll take the boy to my shuttle, request a med droid to meet us,” he said, curtly.
Phasma’s head tilted in a way that might be surprise, “Yes, sir.”
Turning on his heels, he headed to his shuttle.
She didn’t so much think as react, banking the shuttle hard and heading into the maelstrom of debris and distortion.
“Rey!?” Jess yelped, as they narrowly dodged a hunk of debris. “What—”
The shuttle groaned around them and shuddered. She huffed, fighting both her nerves and the ship, “If we can’t navigate in this, they can’t either.”
“That’s not going to be much good when we get pulverized or this rust bucket is pulled apart.”
She glanced up to see a squad of TIE fighters approaching from the Star Destroyer. Struggling against the odd currents and dodging whirling debris, she maneuvered in further, and held her breath, hoping that she was right, that they didn’t have some special tech that was going to allow them to fly in this mess.
At the edge of the debris field the TIEs slammed to a halt, spreading out in a line but not proceeding further. She exhaled in relief.
The star destroyer neared, halting a short way from the TIEs on the edge of the distortion field.
A beep from the com made both her and Jess jump, and the split second distraction lost her control was enough to nearly send the entire shuttle careening sideways into a spinning hunk of durasteel.
Kriff.
Jess opened the com while she wrestled the shuttle back under some kind of control.
“This is General Kaplan of the First Order,” a smug voice spoke. “Surrender now and we may consider leniency.”
“Leniency?” Jess snorted, “Is that they’ll wait a few weeks before executing us?”
She snorted, “Open the link. I got something to say to him.”
“Open?” Jess raised an eyebrow.
“Uh huh.”
Jess flipped a switch to open the mic on their end.
“Thanks but we’ll pass on that,” she said, forcing her voice to sound rather chipper.
There was a long pause, “...I think you may want to rethink that choice. You are out gunned, out manned, and that ancient hunk of junk you’re flying isn’t going to last long where you are.”
A laugh bubbled out of her throat, a kind of manic sort of thing at the situation they were in, “We’ll take our chances, you want us, you better come and get us.”
Notes:
So much Hux in this chapter, and he's so much fun to write.
I wanted to touch base with Finn this chapter too but it didn't fit in. He's not going to be happy when he wakes up.
Everything gone to hell and my poor little family is all scattered. My poor babies, I'm sorry I had to do this to you.
Chapter 15
Summary:
He was sitting in a field in the sunshine, a breeze rustling the loose fabric of his shirt. The air smelled of fresh grass and dirt. In the distance a herd of fathiers played, running free and happy through the grass.
“Finn.”
That voice, her voice. He closed his eyes as a pair of arms wrapped around him, her chin resting on his shoulder.
“Rose,” it was breathed out rather than spoken. He placed his left hand over the one resting on his chest, his wedding ring clinking against hers. Her breath tickled his neck and her body was warm against him. Having her close to him again was everything he wanted, everything he needed. Just the two of them, together, far away from the endless grief and pain of war.
War.
He opened his eyes, the base under attack, Leia… Rey’s kids, Leia’s grandkids. He had been going to go back to find them.
“Am I dead?” he asked, squeezing Rose’s hand. Because either he was dead and this was heaven or—
“No, dummy, you’re not,” Rose leaned over and kissed his cheek.
He nodded, eyes stinging, “But this isn’t real.”
Notes:
A very heartfelt thank you to Star-Horse for giving this a beta read :)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
He was sitting in a field in the sunshine, a breeze rustling the loose fabric of his shirt. The air smelled of fresh grass and dirt. In the distance a herd of fathiers played, running free and happy through the grass.
“Finn.”
That voice, her voice. He closed his eyes as a pair of arms wrapped around him, her chin resting on his shoulder.
“Rose,” it was breathed out rather than spoken. He placed his left hand over the one resting on his chest, his wedding ring clinking against hers. Her breath tickled his neck and her body was warm against him. Having her close to him again was everything he wanted, everything he needed. Just the two of them, together, far away from the endless grief and pain of war.
War.
He opened his eyes, the base under attack, Leia… Rey’s kids, Leia’s grandkids. He had been going to go back to find them.
“Am I dead?” he asked, squeezing Rose’s hand. Because either he was dead and this was heaven or—
“No, dummy, you’re not,” Rose leaned over and kissed his cheek.
He nodded, eyes stinging, “But this isn’t real.”
She sighed, her breath tickling his ear, “No, it’s not.”
“I miss you so much,” his words stuttered as his breath hitched, tears starting to run down his cheeks.
Her chin bobbed against his shoulder, “I know, Finny, I know.”
“I did something terrible,” the words blurted out before he could stop them. “You’d be so disappointed in me.”
“It’s not too late, not as long as we’re still breathing.” Her body pressed against him as she tightened the embrace. “There’s still time to try and get things right.”
He turned his head to look into her eyes. She seemed so vivid, so real. “I don’t think I can fix this.”
She shook her head, “Maybe you can’t, but you can try.”
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
Rose leaned in and kissed him before pulling back to look him in the eye, “I’m not the one who you should be apologizing to.”
Drawing in a sharp breath, he shook his head. Rose meant Rey, he understood that, but she didn’t understand. He couldn’t… how could he ever face her again after everything he’d done?
The wind suddenly picked up, and he felt reality around him flicker and shift. He tightened his grip on Rose’s hand, “Not yet, please, not yet.”
Rose smiled as she seemed to be fading, “Still such a silly dummy, Finny. We’ll find each other again. We will always find our way back to one another.”
“No, please—”
The wind whirled and suddenly everything blurred into a smear of colors. He spun, dizzy, and—
Something connected hard with his head, sending him sprawling on his back. Rough sand pressed to his palms as he tried to push himself up.
“What’s the hurry, thief ?”
He blinked up in confusion at Rey standing over him with her staff as the sun beat down in the unbearable heat. “Th-thief?” he muttered in confusion. Rey was different, younger. This was— he was—
“The jacket, the droid says you stole it!”
— on Jakku?
Maybe Rose had been wrong. Maybe he was dead. Dead and in hell. Cause Jakku, hell, pretty close to the same thing.
Shaking his head, he sat up while Rey held her staff aggressively. BB-8 whirred and tilted his head to look around Rey. This was the moment they had met, so many years ago. He would tell them about Dameron, and she would think he was Resistance and look at him with such awe and like lying coward he had been, he would pretend that’s what he was. The Resistance she’d never met but for some reason believed in. The Resistance that he didn’t believe in yet.
He had loved her, or at least thought he did. Maybe he had just loved what she thought she saw in him. For a time she was the one thing that seemed to matter to him. Until he began to really believe in what he was fighting for and who he was fighting with.
“Rey,” he said quietly, smiling ruefully up at her.
Her brow furrowed suspiciously, “How do you know my name?”
“I’m so sorry, Rey. I’m so sorry.” Before she could say anything he continued, ignoring her confused look, “For all of it, for everything.” He couldn’t stop, the words spilling from his mouth like water released from a dam, “I resented it, you, once I couldn’t deny it anymore, for walking away when I couldn’t. Maybe it even began before that, when I woke up after Starkiller and you were gone. It was like I lost you, even once you came back with Luke, that something had changed. But I loved you, you were my friend, and I swear I never wanted to hurt you.”
Rey lowered her staff just slightly and suddenly she blurred and reformed, older, her hair down— the woman she was now. She looked down at him with pained eyes, “How could you?”
“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered. “I—”
Her face contorted in rage and in a flash he saw the staff move, by the time he could even react it was swinging downward.
“REY!” he cried out—
“REY!”
He sat up with a jerk, nearly falling off the narrow medic cot he was lying on.
“General Tico, I would recommend lying back down,” a med droid spoke soothingly next to him.
His head throbbed as he tried to orient himself. The base, it was under attack, and he— he had brought Leia to the hangar after she was injured. And then he was going to go back, go back for the kids. Rey’s kids.
Then…
Snarling, he leapt off the cot and brushed by the med droid, ignoring it’s alarmed babbling. He stumbled to a viewport, slamming his hands against it. His chest heaved as he stared at the soothing blue warble of hyperspace.
No. No, no, no, no. He slammed his fist against the transparisteel, which didn’t do much other than split the skin on his knuckles. Kelen. Fucking Kelen. He was going to kill that son of a bitch—
“Finn!” His head snapped up to see Kalonia hurrying past the fretting med droid, “You need to lay back down.”
“Where’s Kelen,” he grabbed Kalonia’s shoulders. “Where the hell is the son of a bitch?”
Kalonia gripped the side of his arms gently, trying to push him back towards the med cot. “Not on this transport since you and Leia are on board. Evacuation protocol.”
“Evacuation protocol—” he hissed as she kept moving him back slowly, step by step.
“Yes, evacuation protocol, the one you helped write, if I recall,” she answered. “No more than two members of upper command on any one evacuation vessel, unless there are no other options.”
“I know what the damn evacuation protocol is, Harter!”
“Good, then you know he took a different transport, and that I have no idea what rendezvous coordinates his transport has.” She pushed him so he sat down on the med cot, “And in the meantime you’re my patient, so until I clear you, you’re keeping your ass on this med cot.”
He started to say something and then snapped his mouth shut, closing his eyes tight, “Harter… the kids, Leia’s grandkids…”
Kalonia shook her head, “I don’t know, other than that they’re not on this transport. I wish I had a better answer than that. When status reports start coming in from the rest of the transports that made it out, I’ll check if any are reporting manifests.”
“And Leia?” he asked in a strained voice.
“Still unconscious, but stable.” Someone called Kalonia’s name and she turned her head. “I have to go, stay on this damned cot and rest at least a few more hours. You took a hell of a jolt, and there’s not much any of us can do while we’re still in hyperspace.”
As she left he rubbed his face with his hands before collapsing back onto the cot, staring up at the durasteel ceiling and listening to the hum of the transports engines.
What a mess this was.
What a fucking mess.
“General Kaplan?”
His head turned slightly to the Lieutenant that stood at attention next to him, tearing his eyes from the small, ancient transport that the two rebel survivors had absconded in. As derelict as the ship looked, he was shocked the residual distortion field from the Hyperwave Pulse hadn’t managed to tear it apart yet.
It probably would if he waited long enough, though he wasn’t sure he had the patience for that. Plus, it wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying as blasting them into oblivion.
“Yes?” he asked curtly, turning his attention back to the view screens. Overall, this operation had gone well, but these two remaining vermin were a blight on what would have been a perfect execution. And they were mouthy, at least the bitch that had responded to his com ordering them to surrender was. She had even had the audacity to laugh. To laugh!
“We analyzed the reports from the stormtroopers who were part of the ground assault. They described the two rebels that eluded them—”
“I don’t see why I would particularly care what they looked like, Lieutenant?” he snapped, irritated.
“—one of them matches the description of the rebel Supreme Leader Snoke had ordered to capture alive if possible.”
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He hadn’t particularly tried to capture the woman, despite the orders. It would have been easy enough to shrug off her death during the ground assault on the rebel strike team, and he didn’t particularly give a damn about pleasing Snoke. Leave that to the mewling sycophants like Hux.
But, he also didn’t want to gain the Supreme Leader’s ire, either. Finding a way to just blow the damn shuttle to bits would make it obvious that he had made no attempt to follow Snoke’s orders. Hux, the scheming bastard, would be sure to use the outcome here against him. He could hear him now— you had the opportunity to obtain the prisoner and failed, Kaplan. Either you lack competence or you didn’t try. Which is it?
A headache was starting to form behind his eyes. He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose before glaring up in irritation at the swirling amid the debris in the distortion field. It was a byproduct of the Hyperwave Pulse, created from the tears the pulse created between hyperspace and regularly space, and would take several cycles to fully heal.
Hyperwave was one of several weapons conceptualized by never realized by the Empire. The First Order had spent years pouring over the Empire archives, extracting many potential projects to revive and research. Few had come to fruition, despite the time and effort put into them. Hyperspace tracking had shown promise, even a prototype had been being developed, but unfortunately the lead engineer, along with most of his team, and perished when Starkiller was destroyed. The project had languished since, unrealized.
The pulse was now the first to have a functional prototype. A wave that oscillates between hyperspace and regular space at a frequency so rapid that it destabilized hyperspace lanes. Originally, the concept was a way to knock ships that were fleeing back into regular space, or to knock ships hiding in hyperspace back into regular space. The prototype had proven that there was far more potential than just that. The temporary distortion of regular space meant it could be used to create a no man’s land where it wasn’t safe for a ship to travel, and a perimeter that extended even beyond the field where hyperspace echoed with a reverb of the pulse, and to safely jump required cycling the hyperdrive engines to match the frequency.
There was such potential. Preemptively destabilize areas of space and hyperspace to prevent escapes. Punish unruly systems by surrounding them with distortion fields to pen them in and prevent aid from coming.
Beyond even that, their scientists and engineers were already asking the questions of what would happen if one super sized the pulse and aimed it at a planet? Could the forces at work tear a planet a part? Or destabilize a sun? Most of the researchers thought both were possible.
Glorious, this weapon. Just glorious.
Although right now, the glorious side effect was also quite annoying. The distortion field would disrupt a tractor beam. TIE fighters were especially not suited to dealing with the strain of the field, and missiles and lasers were subject to the same instability and erratic forces, meaning they could not be fired predictably. Firing into the field could easily cause the weapon’s fire to ricochet right back.
“Com them again,” he snapped, grabbing a datapad to pull up the briefing he hadn’t paid too much attention to before, pacing the length of the bridge while waiting for them to answer.
There was a beep as they opened their com, and then the smart mouthed bitch from before spoke, “Unless you’re calling to surrender, I don’t think we have much to talk about.”
He rolled his eyes. If he did manage to get her into custody, he was going to make sure her brief stay on his ship was exceptionally unpleasant. “Am I speaking with…” he paused briefly before finding the name, “Rey of Jakku?”
The line went silent and he smiled smugly knowing he’d blindsided her by knowing who she was. “Ah, I’ll take that as a yes.”
“What of it?” the woman replied, coldly.
“I have orders from the Supreme Leader himself to take you into custody.” He folded his hands together, “Surrender and I will also allow your companion to live.” That was a lie, of course, he fully intended to execute the other rebel immediately.
“Uh huh. Counter offer, surrender to us and we’ll let you go unharmed.”
“You may wish to rethink your position, Rey.” He glared at the shuttle on the viewscreen, “The First Order has begun a full assault on the main rebel base, with orders to take into custody Kylo Ren— and two children.”
Silence was the only reply.
“Surrender and I will see to it you are reunited with your family.”
Still silence.
“Think about it girl. Think long and hard—”
A sharp beep cut him off, the bitch had severed the com. He drew a breath and turned, walking towards viewscreen, “Fine then. Tell our pilots to fire a warning volley into the distortion field, carefully . I don’t want any of our fighters taken out by this.”
If he was lucky, perhaps their warning volley would be redirected right into that pathetic little shuttle. Such a shame, sorry Hux, please tell the Supreme Leader that efforts were made to take the woman alive.
“Yes sir,” the officer said before relaying the orders.
“The boy is stable, General Hux,” the med droid droned in the simpy, pleasing voice the First Order programmed them with.
He looked up from the reports— the rather disappointing reports— from the fleet surrounding the planet. While a good number of the evacuating rebel ships had been intercepted and destroyed, some had managed to slip through and jump to hyperspace. Such incompetence on the part of the First Order fleet was unacceptable.
The droid droned on, “He may wake up, given the low setting of the stun bolt. Shall I give him a sedative?”
Glancing at the boy, laying on one of the couches in the passenger compartment of his Upsilon class shuttle, he frowned thoughtfully. “No. No sedative.But give him a low dose of the force suppressant. Then you may leave.”
Better safe than sorry, after all.
“Yes, sir,” the droid hummed before floating its way back to the boy.
Turning back to his datapad, he frowned. Kaplan hadn’t reported back yet with an update with how the ground assault on Aclo had gone. Irritating, although perhaps that was a sign that something had gone wrong. Having some ammunition to use against that son of a bitch would be wonderful.
Not that he was hoping for failure, of course. Just a minor fuck up would do.
He hummed to himself as he sent an order up to the Finalizer to send Kaplan an update request. If something was wrong, best to find out now before the slippery bastard could manage to muddle through and patch over his mistakes.
Snoke was already not going to be pleased if he failed to acquire the girl child, which seemed likely since the current searches of the base had found no trace of her. He was more than pleased with that result. Having Ren and the boy should be enough to keep Snoke’s ire to a minimum despite that failure, and it would eliminate an additional wild card from this whole crazy mix.
But with the number of Rebel ships that had managed to escape, it was looking more likely that Snoke would be extremely displeased with the outcome of this mission, even with them dragging back two of the three targets. If Kaplan fucked up, he would be able to use that to shift Snoke’s attention away from him and to his rival in upper command.
Hmmm. He tapped his index finger against his chin. So much to think about, though he couldn’t count on anything. Even if Kaplan’s operation had gone smoothly, he was sure Snoke’s anger and this operation’s mistakes would be fleeting. He would make do, it would be a minor setback.
He continued to focus on the reports, until the distinct sense that he was being watched distracted him. Looking up, he glanced over to see the boy’s wide brown eyes watching him. The right side of his mouth curled into a smile.
“You’re awake,” he said, giving the by a glance before looking back at his datapad and pretending to be reading. “Good. How are you feeling?”
The boy’s eyes were boring into his back, but he didn’t look back up again waiting for the child to speak.
Patience paid out, after another minute, a small, frightened voice spoke, “Where’s my daddy?”
He turned, gazing at the boy for a moment, “In a cell, as traitors should be.” The boy’s eyes narrowed, clearly not appreciating hearing his father called a traitor. He cocked his head and smiled, getting to his feet and walking over, clucking scoldingly as the boy shrank back from him. “None of that,” he grabbed the boy’s shoulder and gently pulled him up to a sitting position. Putting his hand under the child’s chin, he tilted his face up to meet his eyes. “Face those you fear with your shoulders back and your teeth bared, not cowering like a weakling.”
The brown eyes narrowed at him again, and he smiled, sitting down on a bench across from the child. “I’m General Hux of the First Order. What’s your name?”
It was quiet for a moment as the boy glared at him with a mix of accusation and suspicion, anger and fear at war with one another. Not surprising since he had witnessed his repeatedly shooting his father.
“I want my dad,” the boy looked away, blinking back tears. Fear was winning out..
He reached down got a bottle of water out of a compartment under the bench, “I expect you do. Unfortunately we don’t get the things we want much in life.” The boy sniffled and he clucked his tongue again. “None of that. Big, strong boys don’t cry. And you’re a strong boy, aren’t you?”
Offering the water, he asked his question again, “What’s your name?”
“Will I get to see my dad again soon?”
He kept his hand with the offering of water out, “I don’t know. It’s not my decision whether or not you see him at all. Supreme Leader Snoke will decide that.”
The boy’s brow furrowed as his eyes drifted down to the water, bottom lip quivering, clearly trying now to keep himself from crying.
“I’m sure you're thirsty,” he said gently. “Take it.”
Slowly, the boy reached out and took the water. He smiled, nodding, and tried again as the boy drank warily, “What’s your name?”
A long silence stretched out, before finally his patience and persistence paid off again.
“Solan,” the boy mumbled. “My name is Solan.”
As the transport rose through the atmosphere Poe was already scrolling the nav computer for ideas of where to go. They weren’t going to have enough fuel to reach the rendezvous point he’d been assigned, which meant he was going to have to jump somewhere closer and then figure out either a way to refuel or get a ride or get in contact with the surviving Resistance so they could come find him.
It would be preferable to find a place with some friends, but he wasn’t sure if that was an option right now. A mostly neutral system, preferably one where there was some trading, would do. If they leaned anti-First Order that would be a bonus.
He settled on a backwater outpost in the rim, a fourteen hour jump. Hopefully fuel consumption and life support wouldn’t be too thrown off by his small passenger, he glanced back at Skye. The girl was still unconscious, which was both concerned and relieved him. It would be safer for both of them if she didn’t wake up until they reached their destination, but he could only hope she wasn’t hurt too badly.
They broke free of the atmosphere and into space littered with debris of destroyed ships. His stomach churned. A lot of ships had been lost before they had been able to make their jumps. How many members of the Resistance had been lost today?
About the only positive things about being in courier transport was that something this small was hard to spot and it moved fast. It wasn’t until the puddle jumper cleared the gravity well of the planet that a proximity alarm went off, letting him know TIE fighters were incoming.
Too late, assholes, he smirked to himself as space stretched and they jumped to light speed.
“Rey?”
She didn’t answer. Jess had been staring at her anxiously since she cut the com between them and the star destroyer. A terrified numbness had overtaken her— the only thing keeping her from panicking was her need to keep focused on keeping them from being smashed to bits in this weird maelstrom of warped space and debris.
“Rey, listen to me. Nothing can get through that base’s shields. He’s full of shit,” Jess pressed. “They’re trying to scare you—”
“They know about my kids.”
Jess’ mouth snapped shut.
“No one knew,” she said, quietly. “Kylo understood from the moment we learned I was pregnant, you know. I didn’t get it, not back then, but he did. Snoke would want them, for their potential power as the offspring of two strong force users.”
“Rey…” Jess started, almost pleadingly.
“Nobody knew, and they still wouldn’t know, if you’d just left us the fuck alone.”
“I’m sorry. I really am. Feel free to break my nose again when we get the fuck out of this mess. But right now we need to figure a way out of this mess.”
She broke her eyes away from the console just long enough to glare at Jess, even though she knew Jess was right. Survival had to be her number one concern right now. Taking a breath, she tried to push away the fear and think.
“You said you didn’t think we could jump even out of this distortion field?” That was what they needed. If they could jump, they could make like they were going to surrender, prime the hyperdrive, and then jump as soon as they cleared the distortion field.
“Nav readings were bizarre, I don’t think we could safely calculate a jump.”
“I’m going to transfer the controls over to you. I want to pull those readings out of memory and take a look at them,” she said. “Don’t underestimate how fast some of these currents pull us, sometimes you need to hammer the thrusters just to keep us from being dragged off.”
Jess just nodded. The shuttle lurched hard a moment before Jess was able to get it back under control.
She pulled the readings from the nav system’s memory, staring at the series of numbers scrolling across the holo display. Jess hadn’t been kidding, the readings were all over the place. Bouncing high and low, she’d never seen anything like it. There was no way they could get a stable calculation when the numbers were jumping—
Wait.
Blinking once she leaned in, scrolling through the readings back from the beginning. A pattern. There was a pattern to this.
It was still bizarre, but it wasn’t random. It was almost like the readings were oscillating. Maybe there was a way they could sync the hyperdrive engine to match the oscillation she was seeing in the readings, it might make it so they could make the jump.
Hard to know how safe it was, but even a longshot at this point was probably worth the risk.
She looked up to tell Jess just in time to see the TIE’s sitting on the edge of the distortion field open fire.
The bolts went scattering in all direction when they hit the field, bouncing around them unpredictably as they were caught in the different currents of the distortion field. Several spun dangerously close to the shuttle, and several others slammed into debris, shattering it into small, fast projectiles whirling around them.
A few bolts of the barrage were sent flying back out of the field towards the TIE’s that fired them, making their pilots break formation and dodge their own weapon’s fire.
It would of been amusing if they weren’t actively trying to avoid getting blasted or smashed to bits at the moment.
“I don’t know if we’re going to survive a few more of those,” Jess muttered.
“Maybe we don’t have to. I… I think anyway, that there might be a way for us to jump. It’s risky but,” she shrugged and glanced down at the readings again, “at this point we probably just want to take that chance.”
“General Kaplan?”
He glanced away from the shuttle towards the officer. They rebels had managed to survive the warning volley, unfortunately. He was giving them a few moments to think about it before he ordered the TIEs to fire a second volley.
“Yes?”
“We received a message from the rebel ship. They say they’re surrendering.”
“Are they now?” He smirked, this would look good for him, bringing Snoke his prize. Might make it even worth not getting to kill the cheeky little bitch. “Back the TIEs off slightly so they can exit the field. Then make sure they’re surrounded to be escorted to our hanger bay.”
The shuttle began to move in an erratic path, but one that was clearly heading towards the edge of the distortion field. He smiled as it crossed over into stable space. The TIE’s began to move towards it.
“Sir! The shuttle’s hyperdrive appears to be active…”
Wait, what? They couldn’t jump here, not with the effects of—
Before he could finish that thought the shuttle’s hyperdrive engines fired and the shuttle vanished.
His mouth dropped. No. How? Trying to make that jump should of ripped them to bits. “Did they succeed in their jump?”
“I believe so, General.”
The bridge fell silent, the officers casting him wary glances as if he might explode at any moment. In the silence the com beeped, he glanced sharply over at the communication’s officer.
“Um,” the communication’s officer stuttered a moment, “General Hux is requesting a status update, sir.”
Notes:
Oh Finn. You've got a lot to apologize for.
I'm trying to walk a fine line with Hux because I want him to be creepy and have a predatory vibe, but not give pedophilia vibes.
Rey figuring out the way to handle jumping in an area still recovering from the hyperwave pulse might have been a bit dues ex machina, but sometimes overly convenient connections need to be made ;)
Hope you're enjoying this. Thank you so much for all the wonderful comments on the last chapter. Keep them coming, they energize me and revitalize my creativity.
Chapter 16
Summary:
“Why?” Rey asked, softly, breaking the silence.
“What?” Jess looked over at her again.
“Acisea. Why?”
Jess turned back to the console quickly, “I was following orders.”
“Great excuse.”
“Some of us don’t decide to be in and out of this fight whenever we want, you know?” Irritation was creeping into Jess’ voice. “Unlike you and Skywalker.”
“ Don’t lump me with Luke. We’re not the same. It’s not the same.”
“Why not? You both put yourselves over the cause. Luke runs off to find himself not giving a shit what it means for the rest of us. And you? I don’t even know.” Jess pointed at her, “We all knew you, we thought we knew you. Finn blamed himself for you getting taken prisoner. He was beside himself trying to figure out how to get you back. And then the next thing we knew you and Kylo were running on the Rim and none of us could understand what the hell happened or what it meant.”
Rey let out of a laugh, “Yeah, everyone told me they knew me. They all thought they knew me, but no one does. Except Kylo.”
Notes:
Heyyyy.... yeah, remember this fic? I promise I hadn't forgotten it even though it last updated in... uh... July 2018?
I intended to take a little break from it because it's such a complicated fic that it's a bit taxing. I didn't intend to let it sit this long, but life got busy and writers block is a pain in the ass.
I'm hoping to focus some energy onto this fic for awhile, which I also hope means the next update won't be a year out.
Just a reminder, flashbacks are in blockquoted text.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
A tense, exhausted silence was broken by the sound of a fist hitting a console.
“I didn’t see any medkits in here.”
“What?” Jess snapped, shaking her hand.
Rey rolled her eyes, “Just saying, you may not want to break your hand punching equipment since there’s nothing to patch you up.”
“I keep that in mind.” Jess leaned back in the chair, glaring at the com console.
“So I’m going to guess no response?”
“This thing is a piece of shit with an ancient com, they probably aren’t getting my message.”
It was weird. She should have felt panicked, but instead she just felt… nothing, numb, dead. “Or the base could have been attacked.”
“Nothing can get through that base’s shields,” Jess snapped. “It’s fine.” She rubbed a hand over her face, repeating herself quietly, “It’s going to be fine.”
“You told me that back in the transport and things didn’t work out too well.”
“Just… just stop, Rey.” Jess tapped on the console, not looking at her.
“Was there a contingency plan in place?”
“What?”
“If the base ever fell, was there an evacuation plan?” she snapped, feeling the numbness fade as her anger grew. “What would have happened to my family?”
“Yeah, there’s a plan.” Jess sounded exasperated. “And I’m sure your kids would be with Leia.”
“And Kylo?
Silence. She gritted her teeth, “And Kylo ?”
“I don’t know.”
There was a tremble of uncertainty there. Rey clenched and unclenched her fists.
“Would you like to punch me again?” Jess turned her chair to face her. “Because I’d rather get that out of the way.”
She turned away, glaring at hyperspace through the transparisteel. “You think they’d kill him.”
“I don’t know .”
“No, but you think they would.” She crossed her arms, “Where are we even going? What coordinates did you use?”
“Emergency jump point. We have some scattered around… systems we left a cloaked signal amplifier in.” Jess turned back to stare at the com, as if willing a response to come through. “We can use it to boost the signal, or use it as a cloaked distress beacon, worst case.”
“And hope the Resistance finds us before the First Order tracks the signal?”
“Pretty much.”
They both fell quiet, listening to the hum of the hyperdrive.
“Why?” Rey asked, softly, breaking the silence.
“What?” Jess looked over at her again.
“Acisea. Why?”
Jess turned back to the console quickly, “I was following orders.”
“Great excuse.”
“Some of us don’t decide to be in and out of this fight whenever we want, you know?” Irritation was creeping into Jess’ voice. “Unlike you and Skywalker.”
“ Don’t lump me with Luke. We’re not the same. It’s not the same.”
“Why not? You both put yourselves over the cause. Luke runs off to find himself not giving a shit what it means for the rest of us. And you? I don’t even know.” Jess pointed at her, “We all knew you, we thought we knew you. Finn blamed himself for you getting taken prisoner. He was beside himself trying to figure out how to get you back. And then the next thing we knew you and Kylo were running on the Rim and none of us could understand what the hell happened or what it meant.”
Rey let out of a laugh, “Yeah, everyone told me they knew me. They all thought they knew me, but no one does. Except Kylo.”
"We don't have time for this," Jess turned away, glaring down at the console, as if blaming the lack of response for getting her into this conversation.
"We're in a shuttle in hyperspace, seems like we have nothing but time."
Jess stayed silent, not looking at her. Rey huffed, glaring out at the flickering blue of hyperspace.
"I was pregnant," she said, quietly.
"We didn't know that."
"Would it have mattered?"
A long pause, Jess stared down at the console, answering softly, "I don't know. Probably not."
The hyperdrive hummed, blue light flickered across the shuttle interior.
"I'm sorry." Jess' voice was barely audible.
Rey turned her head, "Do you regret it?"
The woman didn't look at her, "Yes. Then and every day since."
"If you could go back would you do it again?"
The pause was long enough that Rey was sure Jess wasn't going to answer.
"Probably."
A single word and Rey's heart sank in disappointment. She wasn't even sure why. What had she really expected?
Jess looked over, eyes wet but filled with a deep, sad resignation, "I was following orders."
“I am not pleased, General .”
Hux bowed his head, keeping his thoughts focused and neutral. Not good to let them stray, not in the presence of the Supreme Leader. “I’m sorry, Supreme Leader. Given that we had the objective to obtain certain targets, we had to restrain our air assault so we could send in ground troops.“
“The Resistance was defenseless before you, General.” Snoke leaned back in his throne, folding his hands together and resting them on his golden robe. His guards stood along the walls of the throne room, red contrasting against black. There was a constriction of air around Hux’s neck and he wheezed. “And frankly I am tired of your excuses.”
In a blur he felt himself slam down onto the floor, chin impacting the metal and making his head ring. As he pushed himself up, he grasped onto the feelings of humiliation and relief that no other First Order officers were here to see it.
One strong emotion could be the mask over other emotions and thoughts that might be viewed as more… damning.
“Pathetic.” Snoke’s uneven gait echoed through the room as he descended the steps. Hux looked up as the slippered feet stopped in front of him. “Always worried about the optics when you should be concerned with your lack of results.”
“They’re tattered remnants.” Hux looked up and met Snoke’s beady blue eyes, “Their numbers were low to begin with, and now less than half of those remain. We shall hunt them down and they, in turn, they will draw any of their remaining sympathizers out in their desperation for shelter and supplies.”
“Hm.” Snoke narrowed his eyes thoughtfully before making his way back to the throne. “If I recall,” he began, sitting down and leaning forward, “I believed that to be true after we failed to make it to their base in time to snuff them out after Starkiller fell.”
Hux slowly got to his feet again as Snoke let out a bitter laugh, “Wrongly. All we did was give them time as you failed, again and again, to corner them.”
“But it wasn’t wrong. Their allies rose out of hiding and we took them out one by one,” his eyes flashed, stepping forward. “This is the end game now, the remnants of rebellion will be rooted out and crushed, and no one will dare question our power.”
“My patience is not infinite, General.”
“In a year the galaxy will be cleansed of the vermin. You have my word.”
Snoke let out a contemptful snort, “We shall see.” His eyes narrowed again, “And then we have your other failure to address.”
Looking down, hopefully showing appropriate attrition, “We were able to get Ren. And one of the children.”
“The boy,” Snoke’s lip curled in distaste. “Soft. The girl has much more potential. I want her found.”
“We haven’t been able to confirm if she’s even still alive—”
“She’s alive, I feel her.” Snoke’s gaze fixed on Hux and it took effort not to break eye contact and look away. “As is Ren’s whore.”
“I do not take Kaplan’s failure lightly, Supreme Leader.” Hux lifted his chin. “It’s not the first time he has failed what should have been a simple task.”
“When the Fellfire returns to the fleet, I want Kaplan sent to me,” Snoke said coldly. “I will deal with him.
Hux bowed his head, doing his best to mask the smugness at Kaplan’s downfall. It would likely not appear entirely appropriate. “Of course, Supreme Leader.”
“Ren has been brought on board?”
He nodded, smiling, “They collared him like a dog with a suppression collar. It seemed fitting to leave that on. And we’ve administered chemical suppressants.”
“The boy?”
“In a cell. On a mild force suppressant.”
Snoke smiled, “Have Ren brought to me, my wayward apprentice and I have much to discuss. And when the suppressant wears off have the boy brought to me as well. It is time to begin his training.”
Aside from the dimmed lights on the console and the blue waves of light from hyperspace through the viewport, it was dark in the cramped cockpit of the Courier. Uncomfortably warm and humid too. He’d powered down every system to the minimum, even life support was mainly focused down to pumping enough oxygen to keep them breathing and scrubbing enough carbon dioxide to keep them from suffocating.
Life support was the kicker that had been burning their fuel a lot faster than it should with the second body, small or not, on board. If he was calculating the current fuel consumption right, they’d just make it to their destination and hopefully have enough left to power the thrusters to land.
Then, you know, figure out a way to get fuel or a ride or someway to make it to their rendezvous point. Cause folks in this backwater ports were always willing to help someone in need, right?
Poe rubbed a hand over his face, and laughed. They were pretty well fucked, when it was all said and done.
“Stop that,” he muttered to himself. “Been in worse situations and gotten out of it. Like that time on Woba—”
His words cut off as the feeling of being watched caused the hair on the back of his neck to stand up. Slowly, he turned his head to meet a pair of small, cold hazel eyes glaring at him below the bacta patch he’d put over the wound on her forehead once they’d gotten safely into hyperspace.
“And you’re awake… right. Great.”
Her eyes narrowed at him and the ship suddenly rattled hard, causing both of them to tense.
“Hey! No, no…. All right? No. This bucket is all we got right now so why don’t you wait till we’re at least planet side and then feel free to force murder me and figure out how to make it on your own.” Her eyebrows went up, looking perplexed. The anger had faded somewhat when she scared herself by rattling the ship. He held his hands up, “Or trust me and I’ll figure out how to get you back to your mom, all right?”
The girl pushed herself up to sit against the wall, eyes narrowing again, “Where’s Daddy? Where’s Solan?”
“I don’t know.”
She frowned at him, glancing warily around the tiny cockpit but seeming to accept that answer without question.
He nodded slowly, “You can tell I’m not lying, can’t you?” The only response was another perplexed look, but he kept going. “Yeah, of course you can. So listen—I’m going to do everything I can to get you back to your mom, okay? And you can tell I mean that.”
The girl frowned at him, “Where is she?”
Closing his eyes, Poe sighed, before meeting that piercing gaze and spreading his hands, “I don’t know.”
She broke eye contact, blinking back tears.
He turned away, grabbing one of the three small water bottles, “You hungry? Thirsty? Don’t got much but there’s a little water and some survival rations.”
The girl blinked at the bottle as he held it out.
“Come on, kid, take it.”
“You were going to kill my daddy.”
He took a frustrated breath, “And you were going to kill me for it, so let’s call it even and declare a ceasefire.”
“You’re a bad man.” She just kept on with her accusing glare.
“Aw hell,” he muttered, his head rolling back to stare up at the ceiling. After a moment, he leaned over and set the bottle down in front of the girl. “So is your dad, so let’s call it even there too. Cause right now, kid? We’re kind of stuck with each other.” He turned back to the console and away from those judgmental eyes. “The bottle’s there if you’re thirsty.”
“You’re bleeding,” he had said, voice low.
It was a few weeks since she had found herself making out with Kylo after he’d demanded to know why she hadn’t left him yet to return back to the Resistance. She hadn’t done more that kiss him. Kiss him a lot, yes, but just kiss him.
Waking up the next day she’d been mortified with herself. What was she doing? Why hadn’t she left yet? What was wrong with her that she seemed unable to walk away from a monster?
She’d pulled away from him a bit for the next few weeks, but still didn’t leave. He didn’t say anything, didn’t even bring up that night to her, but she could feel him pulling back, disappointed in her.
They’d stopped at sorry excuse of a spaceport to restock, and she had taken his credit chip and hit the market. Heading back to the ship, a half dozen men had jumped her. It was an act she’d made them regret, but they had landed a few blows.
“A group of men tried to rob me.”
Kylo’s head had snapped the way she had come, hand dropping to his saber hilt.
“It’s fine, I handled them,” she added quickly.
“Are they dead,” he said, teeth gritted, still looking the way she came.
“No, but they’re going to be licking their wounds for awhile.”
He growled, moving to head the way she came.
She sidestepped quickly in front of him, holding her hands up against his chest, “Where do you think you’re going?”
“To exterminate some vermin,” he leaned forward, pressing against her hands, leaning down ever so slightly to look her in the eye. “Since you didn’t.”
“It’s not necessary to kill them.”
“It’s also not necessary to leave them alive.” He started to push forward again and she had shoved, hard. It pushed him back. Not much, only an inch, if that, but she still had managed to move the oaf.
It was weirdly satisfying.
Kylo’s eyebrows went up, his eyes seeming to lighten every so slightly, “You are really proud of yourself for that.”
Heat crept up into her cheeks, “Maybe. You’re not easy to move.”
“I don’t think that counted as moving.”
“Oh, I think it did.” She took a small step back and folded her arms.
“You do?” He stepped close, leaning over her. She tilted her up to look him in the eyes, a smug smile on her face. His lips twitched, “Ah, you do.”
Those words seemed to send a jolt of heat through her. His face was inches from hers. She leaned forward and kissed him.
He wasn’t expecting it. There was a delay before he responded, but then she was lifted off the ground, pressed up against the shuttle, his body practically smothering her.
When the finally broke apart to catch their breath, lips shiny and swollen, she had looked him in the eye. “You’re not going to kill those men.”
“I’m not?” He licked his lips, “Why not?”
“Because I don’t want you to.”
He laughed, and she was pretty sure he rolled his eyes slightly. But he shrugged his shoulders, “Okay, fine.”
She blinked, “Really?”
He rolled his eyes and kissed her.
“We reach our rendezvous point in eighteen hours, sir.”
Finn leaned against a console of the transport’s command center, skimming the current status report displayed on the central holoscreen. The evacuating ships would have each been assigned to one of six jump coordinates, scattering the fleet into smaller groups so if the First Order tracked one group they still wouldn’t get all of them. Each of these rendezvous points were in a system with planet that could be used as a base and supply stash of fuel and equipment.
“Have any reports come in from the other ships?” he asked, fidgeting with his wedding ring. Not knowing how many of them made it out was the only thing worse than not knowing who made it out.
“Maybe two dozen so far?”
He flinched, that was less than half of their ships.
“Not all the smaller ones have coms that can function in hyperspace, sir,” the lieutenant added, quickly.
“Have we gotten any manifests, yet?”
“Just head counts. Across all ships reporting and us we’re at a total of 837.”
That number felt like a punch in the gut. Less than a thousand known to be alive from a base of over 2900. “That’s it?”
“So far… like I said we can’t know—”
“I don’t remember releasing you for duty, General.”
The lieutenant glanced between Finn and Kalonia as the medic strode over to them, pulling out a scanner.
“Harter,” Finn raised his hands up, “I’m fine. Well, not fine, I’ll be fine when I see Kelen again and can put my fist into his face— but well enough, and given that I’m the senior most officer who is conscious right now—”
Kalonia cast him a sharp look and he snapped his mouth shut, standing still as she ran the scanner probe over him.
“Okay, your vitals are stable.” She met his eyes and glanced around the command center, raising, “I’m releasing General Tico back to active duty.”
There were a few murmurs and maybe a few snickers from the other officers. Finn rolled his eyes, “Thanks, Harter.” He leaned in closer to her, speaking quietly, “How’s Leia?”
“Still unconscious, but stable.” Kalonia, sighed as she put her scanner away.“She’s going to be fine.”
Finn nodded. Maybe that was best. Hopefully by the time she woke up they’d have started to get some manafest reports in and he’d be able to tell her that her grandkids were fine.
Those kids had to be fine.
“What about the strike team?” He turned his attention back to the Lieutenant, “Have we heard anything?”
“Not since the last transmission was cut off during the mission.”
He closed his eyes, shoulders slumping. In all likelihood, the entire team was wiped out. Pava, Rey, everybody. But he just couldn’t believe that. He straightened, “Keep scanning for coms on their encryption key. Rey’s a survivor. I’m not going to just believe she’s gone.”
Notes:
FYI, I'm still on Tumblr at CarasStarWarsMusings. I intend to stay on Tumblr even if it's just me and the porn bots.
I also have given in and started interacting with the fandom using my twitter account. My twitter handle is CaraRoseOCanon, feel free to say hi to me there.
Chapter 17
Summary:
Snoke’s uneven footsteps approached. “The mighty Kylo Ren. When I first found you, I saw what all masters long to see— raw, untamed power— and then, something else, something truly special.” Slippered feet appeared in his peripheral vision as he stared down at the floor. “The potential of your bloodline— a new Vader.” Snoke’s voice grew colder, “Only to see you squander that potential, turn your back on everything I offered you. And for what? For what did you betray me?”
He looked up, meeting Snoke’s icy blue eyes, “Where’s my son?”
There was no chance to even see the force lighting before it hit him and he was knocked flat onto the floor again.
“For a worthless girl from a scrap planet,” Snoke continued as if Kylo had never spoken. “For nothing.”
Notes:
Happy New Year! Welcome to the next decade!
I just saw that this has become my second fic to top 1000 kudos (Snare was the first of my fics to reach that milestone), so I wanted to say thank you to everyone. I hope you continue to enjoy the story.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The hum of the shuttle’s engines had become a familiar background noise. Constantly moving was the only way to stay safe.
He was laying on laying on the shuttle’s small bed, holding Skye’s tiny arms to keep her upright bouncing her while she giggled. Her black hair had started to get long enough curl a bit at the edges, framing her tiny face and chubby cheeks. Her hazel eyes squinted as she laughed. If he stopped bouncing her, she’d burst into tears, tiny hands clenching into firsts.
Less than ten feet away, Rey was trying to stir a pot on the portable cooktop he’d picked up a few months ago. They were both sick of ration bars and nutrition packs, so a way to cook a meal while in transit was nice, even if a lot were just dehydrates they were reconstituting.
She had Sol held up on her shoulder with one arm, bouncing slightly up and down as she stirred a pot of some kind of soup with her free hand. Solan’s blond hair had grown, though not as thick as his sisters. It would be a few years before it started darkening to brown. He mouthed his mother’s shoulder, drooling a wet patch onto the cloth.
“You want me to take him?” Kylo asked.
Rey just gave him a dismissive shake of her head, “He’ll cry. It’s okay.”
“You’re hands are full,” he huffed. She was always ridiculously stubborn. He had gotten to his feet, earning an angry cry from Skye as their bouncing game stopped. Adjusting her the crook of his arm, he resumed bouncing her as he walked over to Rey. She quit crying, but fat little lips pushed out in a pout, not happy the game had changed. “I can take them both.”
“He’s fine,” Rey gave him a sharp look as he walked next to her. “She’s enough for you to deal with.”
“I can handle them both until you’re done.”
She didn’t look at him, instead fumbling with her free hand to lower the heat under the pot. He sighed, reaching past her to lower it for her, only to earn a glare for his effort to be nice.
“We’re almost out of fuel.” She was trying to sound like she was saying it as an offhand sort of thing, but he could hear the tension in her voice.
He didn’t look at her. The encrypted credit chip he had taken with him was starting to run low. Not so low that he needed to worry yet, but a few months down the road he was going to run out. What happened then he wasn’t sure. They needed food, they needed fuel, they needed supplies. What was going to happen when he couldn’t buy them anymore?
If it were up to him, he’d just take whatever they needed.
But it wasn’t just up to him anymore. She’d never allow it.
Was she worried about it? Was that why she was asking?
“Yeah, we’ll get to the next port tomorrow. It’s small but we’ll be able to refuel and restock.”
A stiff nod. She was tense, and had stopped bouncing. Solan unlatched his mouth from her shoulder, starting to fret. Rey sighed, bouncing again.
He reached over with his free arm, grabbing Sol, “Seriously, just give him to me.”
For a moment, Rey’s arm tightened, like she was going to fight to hold on to the baby. Then she loosened, letting him pluck the boy out of her arms.
Solan let out a screech, waving his tiny arms at his mother as he was pulled away from her. As the distance increased, he burst into tears. Kylo pulled him close, shushing him, ignoring the glare Rey gave him.
Skye didn’t seem to appreciate the extra attention going to her brother, letting out a howl and bursting into tears of her own, leaving him with a screaming baby in each arm and feeling like the galaxy's biggest asshole. Rey finished heating the food, roughly setting two bowls down and splitting the soup between them.
Once that was done, she turned stiffly, holding her arms out for the babies. It felt accusing, like she was telling him he wasn’t good enough of a father. For a split second, rage flared in his head and he wanted to tell her no.
Then it sputtered away, she was their mother. He wasn’t about to keep his babies away from their mother. He passed Sol over first, letting her settle him on one shoulder before handing her Skye to hold in her other arm. She shushed the babies, walking away. Their cries slowed. He fought a pang of jealousy at how much easier it seemed to be for her to get them content.
He sighed sitting and pulling his bowl over to eat while she walked the length of the shuttle with the kids. Rey couldn’t hold them both and eat. Once he was done he might have to take them from her again and make her eat her food.
They’d probably start screaming again.
After five minutes or so, she approached, both babies quiet, eyes closed, sleeping soundly. He got up, helping her put them down on the bed.
“They were just tired,” she murmured, leaning against him as they stood looking down at the two tiny bundles. He nodded, taking a deep breath as her hand reached up and caressed his cheek.
She pushed his face to look at her.
“I’m just tired too, I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes as she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. Sighing, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Breaking the kiss, she leaned her head against his chest.
He closed his eyes. He didn’t deserve her, and she deserved so much better than him.
“My good and faithful apprentice.” Snoke mocked, voice echoing in the cavernous space as tendrils of the Force wrapped around him, slamming him into the floor.
Kylo pushed himself up to his knees slowly, staring at his reflection in the gleaming black durasteel floor. The glint of the suppression collar the Resistance put around his neck was visible, mocking him. He gritted his teeth together, wishing he had been able to kill more of the bastards during his escape.
Snoke’s uneven footsteps approached. “The mighty Kylo Ren. When I first found you, I saw what all masters long to see— raw, untamed power— and then, something else, something truly special.” Slippered feet appeared in his peripheral vision as he stared down at the floor. “The potential of your bloodline— a new Vader.” Snoke’s voice grew colder, “Only to see you squander that potential, turn your back on everything I offered you. And for what? For what did you betray me?”
He looked up, meeting Snoke’s icy blue eyes, “Where’s my son?”
There was no chance to even see the force lighting before it hit him and he was knocked flat onto the floor again.
“For a worthless girl from a scrap planet,” Snoke continued, as if Kylo had never spoken. “For nothing.”
Grinding his teeth together, he pushed himself up again, staring at his reflection in the floor, fighting the panic trying to cut through his brain. Rey was alright, she had to be. Sol and Skye would have to be alright. He didn’t matter, but somehow the rest of them needed to be alright.
“You, heir apparent to Darth Vader, manipulated by a pair of pretty eyes. Let her twist and turn you around her fingers and mold you into whatever she wanted you to be. Even now, your mind scurries like a frightened gitzka, consumed with thoughts of her.” Snoke’s hand reached down and brushed the suppression collar, “You were collared long before the rebels put that around your neck. She turned you into a domesticated dog, focused on her needs and not your own.”
“That’s not true,” he snapped his eyes up to meet Snoke’s condescending gaze. “She loves me.”
Snoke scoffed, turning and shuffling back towards his throne, “Does she? Well, I suppose most masters love their pets.”
“She’s not my master.”
“Oh?” Snoke leaned forward, “When was the last time you made a decision without obsessing over what her reaction would be?”
Kylo blinked, trying to find a reasonable answer to that.
“That’s what I thought.” Snoke chuckled before his expression darkened. “All of this could have been avoided. You could have been the one to subdue her, bend her to your will, while still fighting for the things you believe in. We could have had the rebellion crushed right now, if you had remained at my side. Peace would reign with the rabble destroyed and the galaxy under the heel of the First Order. All you needed to do was talk to me, we could have come to an understanding.”
That was too ridiculous, he laughed, looking down at his reflection again.
Snoke sighed, a touch of affection in his voice, “Have I ever lied to you, young Solo? From the time I took you in, I was always honest… even blunt, perhaps... with you. I refused to hold you back with lies the way Skywalker had.”
He pushed himself up to his knees, glaring up at Snoke, “You were going to kill her.”
“I did not realize there was any use to her,” Snoke waved his hand dismissively. “Had you pushed for the things you wanted, I could have been swayed into seeing the potential . We wouldn’t have even needed to turn her to make her useful.”
Potential. There was a brief moment of confusion as his brain tried to wrap itself around that word. He looked up, “No.”
“Though even I couldn’t have foreseen how potent your offspring would be. Their awakening has been a jolt through the force.”
Kylo snarled, jumping to his feet, “No!”
Snoke was far enough away that he saw the lighting this time, though only for a split second before being knocked backwards. His head cracked against the durasteel floor and for a moment everything went blank and dark. When he blinked his eyes Snoke was standing above him, scowling. “Blind fool. You are lucky I am so forgiving.” A gnarled hand raised and Kylo felt like nails were sinking into his mind. “First you will show me everything, and then… then my apprentice, I shall show you how she has controlled you.”
Without the force, he had no way to fight back as the claws deepened their hold on his mind and agonizingly ripped and tore it open. There was no way to fight, nor to stop the pain that lanced through his head.
All he could do was scream.
The shuddering of the shuttle as it dropped from hyperspace snapped her out of the exhausted semi-doze she had fallen into. She pushed herself back upright in her seat, using the console in front of her for support and blinking at the small star system they were in. Just a few gas giants and their moons, orbiting a reddish star.
Pava was sitting, tapping commands into her console, pausing to frown down at whatever feedback was being reported to her.
Rey caught her eye and raised her eyebrows in question, and Pava looked down again, “Found the signal amplifier, trying to link up to it.”
“And?”
Jess rubbed her thumb repeatedly over her index finger, “It’s busy.”
“With?”
“It’s transmitting, on a loop.” Jess looked up, fear and resignation in her eyes telling Rey everything she needed to know. It was sending out an emergency transmission.
“Well, what’s it transmitting?” She wasn’t sure why she even bothered to ask, except maybe to shove this whole situation into Jess’ face.
Jess just stared down at the console, still fidgeting her thumb against her index finger. As if by not listening she could pretend everything was okay.
“If it’s sending a message we can listen to it, can’t we?”
Rubbing a hand over her face, Jess pressed down on a button, and warbling sound of an encrypted transmission filled the shuttle cabin. “I know the key, just give me a second to set up the filter.” She tapped some more buttons, and the warble deepened, then burst into static for a split second, before an unknown voice filled the shuttle.
“...repeat, command base has fallen. Order EV2187 has been issued. All operatives are to follow their required plan of action. This message will repeat… Command operation base has fallen. All personnel have been evacuated and the system should be considered in enemy hands… we repeat, command base has fallen. Order EV2187 has been issued. All operatives are to follow their required plan of action. This message will re—”
Jess slapped her hand down on the console hard and the voice cut off. The two sat in silence.
Rey rubbed her eyes, fighting back panic at the thought of where Kylo and the kids might be. They had to be alive, she would have known, have to have known, if any of them had died. Even with Kylo cut off the force she couldn’t believe she wouldn’t have felt it.
Maybe it was just her stubborn refusal to accept the possibility, but for now she was going to run with it, because it wasn’t going to matter if they ran out of fuel and ended up on a dead shuttle adrift in space.
“Order EV2187?”
“Evacuation.” Jess closed her eyes, shoulders slumping. “Proceed to the rendezvous point to regroup. My encryption key can be used to extract the coordinates from the message.”
“Which we have no fuel to get to.” Rey leaned forward and tapped the console, just to reinforce what she already knew. They didn’t even have enough to make a short jump.
“Yeah.”
She leaned her head on her hands, taking a deep breath, then sat up. “So… distress beacon?”
Jess closed her eyes and took a deep breath of her own before nodding, posture changing with resolve. “Distress beacon.” She tapped on the console, engaging the shuttle’s thrusters. “We’ll need to capture the signal amplifier to do the modifications.”
Rey nodded, “Okay, let’s do this.”
“General?”
He looked up from his reread of Kaplan’s report. There wasn’t much chance of Snoke being forgiving, but just in case, it was good to memorize all the details so he could remind the Supreme Leader just how much his fellow General had fucked up.
“Lieutenant,” he frowned over his datapad at Mitaka.
“Phasma has completed the sweep of the rebel’s base. A small handful of rebels were captured and interrogated before they were executed. Unfortunately, none of them appeared to have any information on where their evacuation fleet might be headed. We’re currently extracting any data we can from their data banks, though it looks like most critical data was purged.”
“Hm.” He glanced down at the datapad again, not feeling particularly surprised by this news. It was unfortunate but he was sure they would be able to corner the rebel remnants. They didn’t have anywhere left to run. “No sign of the girl the Supreme Leader wanted captured?”
“No sir. No girl and no body was found that matched the description.”
Given Snoke’s insistence that the child was still alive, that didn’t surprise him. Her being dead would have been more convenient for the future plans he was starting to develop. But at least she was gone, and hopefully would remain hard to find.
“But we may have found something of use in regards to her.”
Hux looked up again, slowly lowering his datapad and setting it on his desk.
“The rebel’s medical data banks are intact.” Mitaka paused.
Hux raised his eyebrows as a way to encourage the man to hurry up and clarify how that was going to help them.
“Both children were given a full biometric scan when they arrived on base. We have enough information to produce tracking fobs. Shall I arrange to set up a bounty?”
Frowning, Hux got to his feet, pacing to the viewport of his office. Saying no to this would be far too suspicious. He couldn’t risk it.
“Yes. Set up the bounty. Contact the guild and send them the fobs, but also publish it openly.” He shrugged, “That should get all the dregs in the backwaters to keep their eyes open in the hope for some credits. Also contact our patrols, make sure they have the tracking data and are looking as well.”
“Specify the asset must be brought in alive for payment?”
Must Mitaka always be such a stickler for details? That would mean less chances of a happy accident. “Yes.” He clucked his tongue thoughtfully, “It’s possible she could lead us to the rebel fleet. Offer double the bounty on the girl for information on the location of the fleet so they don’t try to extract the girl and ruin our chance to corner them.”
Mitaka nodded, turning and walking out. Hux cast a cold glance at the man’s back before returning his gaze back to the space beyond the viewport.
No reason to worry yet, when it was entirely possible nothing would come of this but a waste of time and credits. And if something did come of it, well, he would adapt his plans. Adapting and working from the shadows was what he was good at, and in the end, his goals would be achieved.
Her legs hurt from being cramped down of the floor of the tiny ship. The air was heavy, damp and too warm, leaving her sticky and sweating, shirt sticking to her damp skin. She was thirsty, hungry, and wanted her mom and dad.
The man had offered her water, but he was the one that had tried to kill Daddy and she didn’t want anything from him, even if he was promising to take her back to her mom.
He reached up, flipping some switches and muttering under his breath. She watched him with a cold glare, not changing as he glanced over at her quickly before darting his eyes away.
“Hold on kid, this might get rough.”
The little ship shuddered and she felt a drop in the pit of her stomach as they dropped out of hyperspace, an ugly brown planet filling the viewport. Thrusters revved hard, knocking her sideways.
“Fuck,” the man muttered under his breath, “fuck fuck fuck…” He glanced at her, “We’re on fumes, just hold on…” The ship rattled roughly as they entered the atmosphere, then shook worse as the thrusters revved to slow their descent. They started to stabilize, but then the thrusters sputtered and the hum died down.
“Shit, ah…” The man strained, pulling on the yoke hard. The shuttle shifted it’s angle, but they were speeding up again.
Without warning he leapt out of the seat, jumping on top of her and wrapping his body around hers right as they jolted with impact and the two of them were thrown around the tiny cabin. His body cushioning hers from the worst of the impact.
It finally stopped, the ship rolling slowly once more and coming to rest angled on it’s side. She shook, feeling too panicked to even cry. The man held her for another few moments before untangling himself from her with a groan.
Skye scooted back from him, bits and pieces of debris cutting into her hands. It was dark, only a little light filtering through the dirt caked on the shattered viewport. All she could make out was a shadow as the man pulled himself to his knees.
“Okay, kid?” he asked, not looking at her, groping along the other side of the ship with one arm.
She didn’t answer, just pulled her knees up to her chest and burst into tears.
The kid was crying. Poe guessed that meant she was still breathing and conscious, so there was that. He’d check on her more carefully once he got them out of this wreck.
He searched for the emergency release for the hatch, one arm dangling uselessly, pain flaring through his shoulder. Something wet was dripping down his face. Might just be sweat, but given the knocks he took to his head as they crashed, seemed more likely to be blood. Not that it would matter if he didn’t get them out of here and figure out what to do next.
Pushing debris out of his way, his fingers finally caught on the release. There was a hiss as the seal cracked, light seeping through the inch or so it opened before jamming. The smell of burnt durasteel and sulphur seeping into the cockpit.
“Oh come on,” he muttered, pushing against it. The metal groaned and creaked but barely moved. “Come on you fucking—” He turned his good shoulder toward the hatch and slammed into it, then did it again, and again. It was moving, the hatch grinding again rock as it slowly wedged more open. After an eternity, it finally was wedged open enough for him to squeeze out.
He slid out on his stomach, his hands sinking into layer of fine mud that covered a coarse, rocky ground as he pulled himself out and stood up.
They’d crashed on what looked like a plane of volcanic rock, the expanse only broken by vents spewing steam and ash into the chilly damp air. The planet’s weak sun was sinking low to the horizon.
Squinting, he thought he could make out the spaceport a few clicks away. Too far to walk to by nightfall. They were stuck here till then. Use the wreck for shelter and head out in the morning. He wasn’t sure at that point what they were going to do.
It had been awhile since he needed to improvise on the fly, but at least it had always been something he was good at.
Right now he probably should go check on the kid and patch them both up as best he could while there was still daylight. Dropping back down to his stomach, he crawled back inside to check on the kid.
It was a memory, one from when the kids were just babies. He and Rey had been exhausted, the toll of two eight month old twins, their claustrophobic life in their shuttle, constantly moving, constantly in fear that they were going to be cornered. Not the first or the last that emotions caught up with them and boiled over into a fight.
But it wasn’t quite what he remembered. Rey’s actions seemed colder, more deliberate, more judgemental. Not letting him take Solan seemed like a punishment. Her pointing out they were low on fuel felt more like an accusation, as if she was scolding him for not taking care of them properly.
Wrong. In small ways, but wrong.
“Not wrong, boy. You just have convinced yourself otherwise.” Snoke’s voice laughed. “She even took the children away from you to punish you. She created your weakness, and used them to control you.”
No. They had been crying and she wanted to soothe them.
“Foolish. So foolish, to deny what was going on the whole time.”
He watched the memory replay, the twins finally fell asleep and he helped Rey put them down on the bed. Her hand caressed his cheek, but it didn’t feel gentle. It felt cold, manipulative, and the eyes he met weren’t soft, they were calculating. Her apology didn’t sound apologetic, nor was there affection in her eyes even when she pressed her lips to his.
“Of course not. It was always a means of getting what she wanted from you.”
No. Liar.
Pain seared through his mind, wiping that memory away. Slowly, a new one began to materialize.
Snoke’s voice sighed, “My poor boy. I have so much more to show you. In the end, you will see the truth.”
Notes:
I tried to write a fluffy opening flashback to this chapter, because after TROS I figured we were all in pain and given the suffering going on in this fic, I wanted to give a bit of a break. I failed and it turned out to be more angsty than fluffy, but it does give you the image of Kylo bouncing his chubby little daughter, so hopefully that at least helps.
Thank you all for your comments, kudos, and still being excited for this story after a year without updates. Love you guys.
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NotTheYounglings on Chapter 1 Sun 03 Dec 2017 09:43PM UTC
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