Chapter Text
Some stories are condemned to end the same way they started. For example a relationship that started via internet, ends via internet. What an irony! More specifically, Jin's and Jungkook's relationship. Jin had met Jungkook in an online game and they had immediately clicked with each other. Jungkook was then working in another country and was not to come back for at least a hole year. However, they chatted all the time and after Jungkook had paid Jin a visit for his summer vocation, they decided to go out. They had a lot of things in common and they understood each other perfectly. Or that was what Jin thought.
From Jin's perspective Jungkook was a real introvert who was naturally very awkward with everyone when it came to communication. For that Jin tried to endure all the times Jungkook was cold towards him, telling himself that everything would be different when Jungkook came back permanently. Also, Jin was quite older than Jungkook, so he felt a bit responsible to be the more mature and understanding one in the relationship. Jungkook was his first real crush and relationship and he wanted it to be a success. Jin was always afraid of relationships and he believed that no one would love him for the hole him... Jungkook was the only person he had opened up to and felt accepted by.
Time pasted, Jin endured some more maltreatment, and finally Jungkook came back permanently. Truth be told with Jungkook's arrival everything changed. He apologized to Jin for giving him the cold shoulder lately and blamed it all to the distance and the exhaustion from his job. Jin understood and was so over heals for him that he had forgiven him immediately. They both decided to start over and it came to no one's surprise that Jin gave him his all.
All seemed to be perfect. They lived in different cities but still they were closer than before. Moreover Jin visited Jungkook almost all the time and spend hole weeks at his home. Things went so good for the two of them that Jin was searching for a job and a place to stay near Jungkook. Jungkook had asked him to spend the holidays of Christmas and New Years together and had looked really sad that Jin could not go earlier. Jin had planned to surprise him by going there earlier so they could spend Jin's birthday together too.
That is what brings today, three days before Jin's departure. Jungkook had messaged him early in the morning and asked him for a video call. Little did Jin know for what was about to go down.
'Jin-hyung, I can't take it anymore... I must be honest with you; I do not feel the same way as before for you...' Jungkook started right when the call started.
Jin was speechless... He could not translate what he had just heard.
'You know you demand too much of my time. You want me to affirm you all the time about how good you are and also we bicker constantly lately. I feel like you try to find reasons to attack me lately...' Kook continued with a poker face.
'Come on! When did I ever do all that?! A-And we always bicker... that's how we got to know each other and fall in love! You never choose me against even your videogames and I never told anything about it until now... What attention are you speaking of? Do not bullshit me!!! How can your feelings change over night? Didn't you just yesterday tell me that you loved me back?' Jin let everything out with one breath... He didn't want to even think of what was happening.
'I was actually thinking of it for quite some time now... It is just it could not go any further' Jungkook answered coldly.
'Why haven't you told me anything? I may have changed things if I knew that they got in your nerves! Why do you not give a second chance? I had when you had come back...' Jin now had started to almost beg. He did not want it to end.
'Hyung... I know and I am sorry! I did love you but right now I do not want to be together anymore. You cannot change my mind! You know how hardheaded I am...' Jungkook said with glassy eyes.
'So you are telling me that you are ending us just because of your hardheadness?' Now Jin felt like crying and was not sure if it was by his anger or by his sadness.
'Yes! I am truly sorry! I really wish you find somebody else!'
'What are you talking about? You know my feelings for you and you say something like that? You are the only one right now I love...'Jin tried to digest Jungkook's suggestion.
'Do not be stupid! I was just your first. I understand you are hurt right now but you will find someone new I am sure of it' Jungkook said once more.
'No I do not want to! I do not open up just for anyone... Anyway, is this the end? Won't we talk with each other again?' Jin was now shaking with his effort to not cry or yell.
'If you do not want us to I would understand but I hope that we can be friends later on at least. To me you were a friend also and not just a lover' Jungkook sounded a bit affected at last.
'I see... You were a friend to me too but I see you as so much more still so I am not sure if I can do that... I'll try thought...'Jin didn't want to be friends, he loved him too much for that but did not want to lose him completely either.
'I know...' Jungkook said with a little broken voice. He did not want to show any kind of feelings but at the end he almost did. He knew how much he hurt Jin and he did love him just not as a lover anymore.
'Jinnie I must go now. We have to hang up.' He said softly.
Jin needed a minute to compensate for everything that had just happened. He took a deep breath and answered finally.
'Yeah... I guess this is goodbye. Bye Kookie' He tried to not let his voice break with the cries he was holding in.
'Bye Hyung!~' Jungkook said before he ended the call and them in general.
Jin was not sure what had hit him just yet...
He was rejected by the one person he had really opened up to. He always feared of relationships and tried to stay away. And for once he had let himself free of that fear and now he was in troumendous pain! Oh how much he regreted letting all his fears go away... He had just one thing go well in his life and from what Kookie stated he had ruined it by himself without even understanding it.
His past dark thought were back in full force. He felt like good for nothing, alone and in pain like never before. He wanted to end everything right then! He was alone no one would care anyway...
Just then however a new thought came to him. There was someone there for him maybe... Someone that would listen and give him a different way of thinking. He picked up his phone and dialed the number...