Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

He was offering up his hands to her, staring with an intensity that made her want to avert her gaze. But she was a junior deputy, trailing along to earn her keep, especially to get Pratt and Hudson off her back. No way was she turning this opportunity down. Rook was starting to get sick of going on coffee runs, which she was sure wasn’t actually a thing that normal stations made people do. Being forced to make each call, no matter how small, was getting old too. This was a nice big middle finger to them all, she was the one who had stepped forward to go in the church. And now she was the arresting officer, Burke was right, they were getting their names in the paper. That was surely worth locking eyes with Joseph Seed. Everything else dialed down until it was just him, his offered wrists.

Her periphery was blackened, blotting out Burke and the Sheriff. Leaving her with the picture perfect family that she tried her hardest to ignore. The tallest one was giving her the stink eye, glancing between her and his siblings. Shaking his head almost as if he was disappointed with the scene playing before them. His thick, reddened, blotchy arms were crossed dominantly over his chest. He was a soldier, a warrior. The brute strength that got them so far without anyone being able to fight back and push them out of Hope County.

The female, looking the youngest, had her arms swinging by her side. A smile loose on her lips. Flowing white dress spanning out around her, decorated with ribbons and lace. The physical embodiment of innocence. All the girl needed was a flower crown to complete her ensemble for Christ’s sake. She exuded an air of comfort and solace. It was a trick, Rook had a great bullshit detector and that girl was full of it. She was probably the one who drew them in, made them believe this cult was good for them. In the end when the inevitable happened and they realized their big mistake and took off their rose colored glasses and saw past the girl’s facade, what made them stay was fear.

It was hard not to notice the third man, the one who proudly displayed himself on the podium at the front of the church. He was bouncing on his feet, eyes on her the entire time. It was a little uncanny to say the least. And now that she was acknowledging him seemed to make him more excited. He walked forward, pushing the army man’s hand away when he tried to hold him back. Probably to stop him from getting shot considering the hostility of the marshall.

Oh, but he sauntered up, a gleam in his brightly colored eyes that she could almost mistake for interest. With her gaze shifting behind Joseph’s shoulder, he half turned. Mouth turning downward when seeing his brother.

The immaculately dressed brunette stood beside Joseph. A soft smile dressing his features nicely. That moment it took for her to drink him in made her miss the marshal’s next command. As rough and biting as his tone was, she was in her own world. The Seeds did that to her, they were an intimidating bunch.

“Rook, put the cuffs on him.”

Her not stepping forward had nothing to do with having second thoughts. It was more towards the man with blue glasses perched atop his head that had her feeling uneasy. Like he was one step from raining hell on her if she laid a finger on The Father.

“Goddammit Rookie.”

The brunette leaned closer, shoulder pressing into his brother’s back. A looming presence who was staring as if seeing her for the first time, as if he was glad that his God had placed them there. As if this was all meant to be

“Sometime it’s best to leave well enough al--”

“Shut up!” It came out clearly, she was shocked her voice didn't warble. That she sounded strong. Like the authoritative figure her badge declared her to be. She took his wrist, wrapping her slender fingers around his skin, handcuffs waiting in her free hand. With a calming breath she was about to snap the metal shut, seal their fates. Ignore Joseph’s ramblings that God was watching, that she could take her friends and leave. She glanced up at him, at the emotionless cult leader who has killed and harmed. This was the right thing to do, besides, it’d make for one hell of a story back home.

Joseph was nudged--well--more like shoved, violently, to the side. It happened in a second, a single exhale and now the mystery man had taken his brother’s spot. Despite the yelling of the marshal and the sheriff, who was trying to play mediator, she had time to think that this man was noble. Saving his loved one, though it was delaying the inevitable, the thought was there.

In her periphery she caught sight of Burke, holding tightly onto Joseph's upper arm as if the man was going anywhere. He looked surprised, bun coming loose and glasses hanging lower on the bridge of his nose from when  his brother had jostled him, but he was plaint. Remaining still as Burke used his own handcuffs, winding them too much, she realized from the light clicks it gave off each time it got tighter.

But her focus was mainly on the 6ft man stomping towards her looking utterly pissed. At her? What had she done but been an observer in this mess? Excuse were already tripping on her tongue, hands flexing near her gun, the same one she was warned never to draw unless absolutely necessary. Though now she was considering it with each step he was taking. His arm shot out, allowing her to get a better view of his scars.

He was veering towards his brother. Not her. That made her relax, shoulders drooping. At least one person in this family understood the severity of this situation, that they were cops, the ones in charge now. No matter how untouchable they usually where, they weren’t above the law. Even if their congregants worshipped them like Gods.

“Cuff me instead, Rookie.”

What?

His brother stopped, arm falling back at his side and lip quivering like he was fighting back a laugh at the sudden silence in the church. Because everyone heard that. And now everyone was staring at her, making her cheeks turn pink, noticed by the man who was offering his wrists. Holding them close to his chest as he took another step near her. He was smiling, too wide, his pupils were dilated, so damn giddy. She didn't even know the man, he had lost his mind after one encounter and the first words he said to her was a request to place handcuffs on him. And she almost wanted to do it. The cuffs meant for Joseph were dangling limply, begging to be used. So why not this one, he wasn't the one the cops were after, but it couldn't hurt right?

The words of  ‘yes,’ signaling confirmation, was ready to spill out into the darkened area, mouth parting, lips curling.

“Jesus Christ, let's get the fuck outta here.” Burke was scowling, brushing past her and gesturing for her to follow. “Whole damn family has lost their mind.”

The sheriff didn’t give her a chance to make any sort of move, though she wasn't sure what that would have been. He snapped the cuffs on her belt for her when she proved too shocked to move. He assisted in guiding her out, whispering when they were far away enough for them to not hear that it was okay to be frightened but to not let this scare her out of being a cop. That crazies do that all the time, going as far as to joke around that when they got back to the station that Hudson and Pratt wouldn't let her live this one down. That had her smiling already, chuckling as he pulled away to push open the doors.

She wished she hadn't looked back before the large white doors knocked shut with a resounding boom. The face of that man was one of love and desperation all at the same time. There was a few choice words ringing in her head to describe that look he was giving her.  Though the ones that came to mind, that stood out above the rest made her tremble from fear.

Pure, devoted infatuation.

Chapter Text

He was pacing now that everyone had gone outside, watching as they milled about on the open compound. Joseph’s sermon was lovely, he had expected nothing less. It was the first one he gave since those deputies had come in and tried to uproot them from the inside out. He spoke of those sinners, of the one who wasn’t captured.

The one who got away.

John had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling. This was God answering his prayers, that’s all. Keeping her away from his brother’s and sister for the time being until John could get his hands on her. Show her his side of things, he wanted to be the one to make her see. And it wasn’t fully because she was his ticket into Eden’s Gate. He wanted her for the collapse too. It was about time someone got sent his way. And he’d be damned if anyone tried to stop that. He was already dealing with awful feelings of jealousy he had yet to atone for. When Joseph walked free from that helicopter crash and was dealing with his minor injuries Jacob hadn’t hesitated to ask what happened. And his brother hadn’t left a single detail out. How they were the first one to awaken. She was the only one he was able to speak to before his men came along. He told them how he had sang Amazing Grace, how he got close to her, saw how her eyes widened with a mixture of curiosity and fear. Joseph said he felt compelled to cup her cheeks and bring her near, show her that he meant no harm. He didn’t, saying he hadn’t wanted to give into temptation. Causing Jacob to smirk and make snide remarks about the stunt John pulled in the church. How he was thirsty. John scoffed at that, covering up his embarrassment with some stupid joke about Jacob, being 47, should not use the word ‘thirsty’ ever again.

John made a hasty retreat back into his plane, Affirmation, saying how he was going to hunt for that sinner. A complete lie, he went straight to his ranch to calm himself down. Question why these feelings were rising so suddenly. He didn't miss Joseph's inquisitive gaze on him. It was only a matter of time before he was given the 9th degree by his brother. He was just waiting for another talk on lust and not giving in.

He wasn’t doing well hiding his need to find the woman who had been seen roaming around his region. It had gone beyond wanting her to be baptized and brought into the fold just as Joseph had told his flock. That these sinners were misguided, led astray by those above them, those that told them how to act or what to do. But they could be redeemed, put to good use as they worked valiantly to get into everyone’s good graces.

John kept checking his phone, he was in the front pew and kept catching the confused looks from his brother who was too busy preaching to tell him to listen closely. Besides, with the way his brow was wrinkled and the fervency with which his thumbs sought out the keys it must've seemed important.

Joseph did approach him when it was over and he noticed John blowing off some of their followers who went up to speak with him. He was the baptist, supposed to be sympathetic. Understanding or else no one would trust him with their darkest sins. Right now he wasn't exactly exuding those qualities.

He was like a petulant teenager when Joseph came to stand by his side, turning away to hide the screen of his phone. Joseph cleared his throat, trying to catch his attention and only getting a light grunt in return.

“Everything all right?”

“Yes.” It was said absentmindedly. Eyes not catching his brother’s. “Y’know, that deputy is something else.”

“Hm, I suppose. I’ve heard she’s causing a mess back in Holland Valley. We’ll set up baptisms later this week. Can I count on her attendance?”

“Of course...if she would just text me back. She has a penchant on ignoring me.”

Joseph gaped at John. Opened his mouth to question him but standing there, staring blankly. Trying to run it through his mind what John had just said.

“She answered my calls last night, now she won’t respond.” He tossed his phone up and down in his left hand, facing away from Joseph, knowing the disapproval he would see.

John keyed out another message, waiting all of ten seconds before he was opening up her contact in his call list, tongue poking out of his mouth as he hovered over the blue telephone icon.

“The deputy didn’t respond to my last thirty messages so I’m gonna call them again.”

“John.” Chastising, repremaning like he truly was a father to his brother. Taking over the parental role so well after all these years. Finally he moved his feet to walk towards John, placing a calming hand on his shoulder and squeezing once to draw his attention. “Don’t push things. I saw the way you looked at her, how you desire her. Maybe there’s more than lustful thoughts that crowd your mind. If this is truly how things are meant to be then let her come to us. She will find her way.” Joseph gently took the phone, placing it in his back pocket and not missing the way John whined in annoyance. “Do not scare her off. Take a breath and calm down.” He pulled his brother in by the nape of his neck, kissing his cheek and pressing their foreheads together.

“Patience.” He pulled him into a tight hug, hating the way he trembled like he was utterly scared of the results that were yet to come.

Chapter Text

The deputy hadn’t meant to run into John Seed, like literally barral into him as she glanced behind her to check if the Peggies she had been shooting at decided to give chase. Just her luck, she had ran out of ammo, still sporting her standard issue pistol and the bow she picked up in some prepper stash Dutch had pointed her to. There was two arrows on her back and she was in no way confident in her stealth skills. That’s why she had cheered to the empty air when she found a hiking trail in the woods. That celebration was short lived when she turned a sharp corner, diverging off of the path and slammed into John. He had been expecting it as much as she had and they both went down as a result.

He had gotten the short end of the stick it seemed, as he struggled for breath below her. He went down hard. Smashing his head with a sickening thunk and landing right on his back, knocking the wind out of him. She was only slightly disoriented and untangled herself from the baptist, who she had only one encounter with beforehand and during that time he had held her underwater. He almost drowned her, deemed her unclean. Dutch told her the steps he took, that confessions came next and in no way was she about to let him get his hands on her long enough to find out what methods he used to make people say ‘Yes.’ Word spreads quick and she knew what he was capable of.

The fact that he recovered impossibly fast made her terrified. Just a few seconds ago he was writhing on the ground, struggling for air and fighting a concussion. Now he was gaining speed as she zigzagged through bushes and hopped over fallen logs. This area was still new to her, she had no idea where she was going and as a result almost landed in a large lake when she broke free from the forest. Her heels dug into the ground in an attempt to keep herself on land. No way was she about to find out how cold that water was. It was nighttime after all.

John bursted through the trees, pure determination reflected on his face along with unmistakable rage. Though she couldn't blame him there, not when she was stopping cult supply trucks and blowing up silos.

She braced herself for what she knew was coming. There wasn't enough space, or time for that matter, to jump out of the way as he launched himself at her. Taking her around the waist and into the rapids below.

The term rapids used loosely she realized as she stood up with ease.

The water was frigid, had her shivering right away as she held her arms above the water and tried to shuffle out, make it to the shore before John kept her in, this time around The Father was nowhere in sight to step in in case his younger brother went berserk.

He didn't give her much of a chance. Head popping up and shaking like he was a dog. He caught sight of her quicky and plunged forward, taking her knees out from under her. Making her go right back in the water, fully submerged and extremely mad.

She thrashed, kicking up a storm. Shoving out her hand she managed to clip him on his jaw, sent him spiraling away from her. It gave her enough time to get her bearing and make it further, hands on a nearby dock, ready to pull herself up.

Suddenly she was being weighed down. John was clinging to her, legs wrapped around her midsection. Using gravity and his body mass to make her sink into the water. This time less violently. They stayed like that, standing in the water that came up to her waist as he hugged her to his chest like his life depended on it. And for the moment she let it happen. It was obvious they were both trying to get their bodies under control. Calm their racing hearts.

“You know deputy, I’m willing to forget the chase you led me on if you agree to come with me to my bunker.”

Rook bit back the scoff that almost slipped out. Was he that deluded? “And do what with me.?

“For confessions of course.” He said it was ease, as if she was the crazy one for not knowing what he was referring to.

“No.” Said through gritted teeth now that the cold was seeping into her bones. Making her clothes sag.

He tsked, laying his chin on the crown of her head. “Those aren't the magic words I’m afraid. Try again, and really think about it this time. Think about what you are saying and why.” John whispered, body trembling.

“No John, just let me leave. Your men aren’t here to protect you. Dangerous considering your notoriety, I’d get out of here if I were you. All it takes is the push of a button and the resistance will know exactly where we are.” Rook laughed cruelty, some semblance of having the upper hand. “And I think they’ve been meaning to have a word with you.”

John sighed, acted like she never spoke at all. “Say yes. Please. One word. It’s so simple. I’ll even let you see Hudson, surely you care about your friend, Deputy?”

“Well aren't you kind.” She felt him loosen up as he chuckled at the malice in her voice.

“Maybe you don't need to confess, I have an idea what sin you carry dear.”

She was getting sick of this back and forth. It was late, she was cold. She tipped her head forward, hoping she'd get this right, she was shorter than him after all. But when she tossed her head back and made contact and heard him cry out, she was quick to scramble away. That hit to the skull hurt him as much as it did to her. Her head was throbbing, making her sluggish as she made her way further onto the shore.

John recovered fast once again, holding onto the hem of her shirt as she clung to the grass. Her legs kicked out, trying to shake him off. He only held on tighter. “Say yes.” John snarled out, pulling her back in with an impressive amount of strength. He held her by her collar, eyes sparkling as he brought her on her tiptoes so they could stand at the same height.

“I’ll get that word eventually. Pull them from those lips of yours any means necessary. This is an important part of Eden’s Gate that all its members must go through. I want you to say yes, you may not understand how much it means to me--to us, my family--that you stand by us.”

John broke away from her when he heard her radio go off, apparently not completely busted after their water sports.

“Rook? You there? You've gone dark on me, just checking in.”

Dutch, the one true friend she had at the moment, the only other person she met was Grace, and the woman seemed busy, too busy to run off at the snap of her fingers. Dutch though, he knew everyone, he’d send more than enough people to her if he thought something was amiss, all it would take was a lack of an answer on her part. And from the look in John’s eyes he seemed to understand that as he slowly backed off, hands raised, palms facing her in a ‘no harm intended’ sign.

She breathed a sigh of relief, knowing how close she just came to being whisked away for confessions. The deputy climbed out of the water and jogged off, putting distance between her and John.

“I’m here Dutch, went for a swim, that’s all.”

Chapter Text

John Seed having her number was nothing new, his endless stream of calls and texts were, at first, enjoyable. Not soon after switching over to tolerable. Now, well now they were verging on an annoyance. One that made her want to chuck her phone in the bliss infused lakes that were scattered around Hope County.

It was usually at night, an influx of messages where she began to wonder if he had insomnia. That was quite the thought, made him appear more human like the rest of them.

Some days she would get lucky and he wouldn't bring up her confession that was yet to be done or Eden’s Gate at all. They would be two normal people just talking about life or the world around them. So much so that she figured out they agreed on a few topics, they found common ground in the most mundane of things. Like their favorite ice cream flavor, or which color they liked best. They seemed to both have an aversion to the heat, preferring the coldest and rainiest of days the world could throw at them. Both people occupying the the same air and wanting a good life for those around them.

Then the pictures started, nature shots and selfies flinging back and forth between the two. It got to the point where they were choosing outfits and weapons they should have for the day. John being the one to start that when he sent her an image of two rifles laid out on a scuffed table wit the story that he was going hunting with Jacob, asking her which one he should use. It escalated from there, going to his clothing, extending out towards what he should talk about during Joseph’s sermon. She asked the same of him, save for the whole manic preaching part for obvious reasons, it seemed to make him happy. Kept him off her back for the time being, she didn't feel the same ferocity coming towards the Peggies, so something was being done right. That was what made her continue. It was harmless.

But when she woke up to twenty text messages, all from John, she was ready to pull her hair out. She had to turn her phone to silent each night from how he kept her from the alluring draw of sleep. Ignoring her friends did not get them on the best of terms but it was something she was willing to sacrifice if it meant she could function properly come morning.

She rolled over to grasp at her phone, clicking it open and scowling at what she saw. Selfies, all selfies of John. The man was vain, egotistical. Always baited her into giving him some kind of response. Whether it be petty or she flipped around some compliment, turned it into the banter you’d expect from close friends.

Rook wasn't really sure what to make of the ones he sent her. It was taken late last night, sometime when the rest of Hope County was resting like healthy people do. The latest one she clicked on was different than the other 19, made her zone in on it. It was taken close up, just his face instead of his full body. John’s hair was messed up, flattened in some places while other strands stood poking out in different direction. Dark blue sunglasses were pulled on his head. His teeth were clenched painfully tight. His brow was wrinkled, eyes squinted, looking the unhappiest she had ever seen him. Like there had been a death in the family rather than the bullshit text he had sent after the image.

Tfw they don't say yes

She officially was done with this man. If she had another run in with him it would be too soon. There was no recovering from what he had sent her, acting like someone half his age on social media, something the Seeds had an aversion to judging by the loudspeakers spouting nonsense at their outposts. Some bullshit about how sinful the cloud was. Yet John didn't mind the attention or acting like the whole world could see what he sent.

Through lidded eyes she managed some snarky reply that she knew would make him smile. Please, for the love of God, lose my number

Rook tossed over to the other side of the bed, away from her phone screen that was lighting up excitedly with each message it received.

Whatever, when she felt more lucid she would deal with the wrath of John, lord knows he had just as much as she did

Chapter Text

John had to know she was making her way towards him, they were in his bunker after all, Peggies firing off rounds left and right as she dodged between cover. They would’ve told him by now, let him know to be careful. Not that he had ever taken any precautions around her before. It’s like he was never truly afraid of her, and that made her all the more angrier as she plowed through his men. Snapping necks and bashing people over the head with a shovel she had now claimed as her own. She only had to use the gun she had stolen off a dead body twice, both headshots. The deputy was proud to say the least. Something that was frowned on. And maybe if John had not taken so long rolling Hudson further away then she would’ve had more time to explore her sins.

She rounded a corner, running so fast she almost slipped, her feet scuffing on the floor, making a large squeaking noise. It was enough to catch John’s attention as he slammed the large door shut, she watched him struggle as she jogged up to it. And she didn't blame him, those things were heavy as hell, she'd have a word with whoever made those things.

Through the tiny plexiglass window John glanced up after securing Hudson’s restraints. He had a light smile on his face, head tipping in curiosity as he took in her anger that was clear on her face, she knew that from the way he was looking at her. It was unbridled wrath.

“Deputy, what a surprise. To what do I owe the pleasure?” John hummed. The nerve he had, as if he didn’t fill her body with bliss and drag her here. As if he wasn't planning on torturing one word out of her in a few minutes. He was playing house, acting sweet.

“Here to see Hudson, John, you know that.” She tried to keep the malice out of her voice. Figured she could act nice, coerce him to let her through, to make his men not shoot her dead.

John crowded the clear window, blotting out her view of the woman behind him. “Ah, um..” He sputtered for a second, eyes flicking around as if trying to find a reasonable answer. “She,” He cleared his throat, regaining some confidence. “She doesn't want to see you.”

She let out a slow breath, slowly losing her control.

“Careful there dep, I see your wrath, it’s not very fitting.”

“John.”

“Hm?” He leaned impossibly closer to her, hand coming to grip at the edges of the window, fingertips curling, as if he wanted to get out as much as she wanted to get in.

“Hudson.”

“Who?”

“Hud--son.” She separated each syllable, stressing the words.

“Mmm, nope, drawing a blank here.”

This time she couldn't help let a laugh slip out. A soft chuckle that showed her stress and disbelief for the situation.

She glanced over her shoulder, saw a door had been closed behind her. That’s why no Peggie had come to cut this short. Really she had all the time in the world. Not that she wanted that, this was ridiculous. She couldn't believe the man who was joking around in front of her, who was acting like a child, was John Seed. The fearsome baptist who terrorizes people was messing around with her like they were friends.

“John.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. Head hitting the glass. She didn't miss the small, ‘Careful,’ he had mumbled out when her forehead made a dull thunk.

“My deputy friend, Hudson. Don’t play dumb, I’m not in the mood.” Rook saw the scowl on his face, how he had taken a step back. She was losing his interest with her snippy replies. In a single breath she changed tactics back over to her niceties. “What would it take you to let me have her, take her away from here?” John let out a long drawn out sigh like she was hurting him.

“If you take her, will you say yes to me? Will you confess?”

Rook heard Hudson’s screaming through the tape that covered her mouth, probably trying to convey that she should run. That she shouldn't give herself over. But she was a noble woman who cared for those around her. So she ignored Hudson the best she could and caught the desperate look in John’s eyes.

“If that’s what it takes John, then so be it. It’ll be just you and me huh?”

John nodded slowly, a smile on his face as he activated bliss to flow out in the open in a large vent, she felt compelled to run away, get the fuck out of here while she still could. But the bliss was already getting to her head. The door opening didn’t seem as threatening as it should and she fell forward into John’s grasp, letting herself go numb as he hauled her away, further underground. She had a feeling he would do everything in his power to make sure she never got away now that he had her within his reach. She belonged to him.