Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

An empath is a good listener.

That was something Akaashi heard a lot about himself. Though, that descriptor wasn’t entirely accurate.

Ever since he was a little kid, he could feel the emotions of those around him. From a young age, he had learned what it meant when people said to ‘put yourself in other people’s shoes.’ He didn’t really have a choice in it.

The people he associated with dumped their emotional baggage on him without his permission. It wasn’t out of ill will—simply, he absorbed their feelings like a human sponge.

After a while, he wasn’t even sure what he was feeling himself.

When others talked with him though, it was a little lighter. The happiness didn’t blind him as much, the sadness hit less like a truck. Anger was manageable, and jealousy, guilt, and confusion were duller.

It was just easier to listen to them vent than it was to let the emotions ruminate. It was easier to be a good listener.

Akaashi often wondered about his soulmate. He wasn’t a romantic like most of his peers were, but, he didn’t completely dismiss the curiosity that came with passing off his powers to someone else as if it were an Olympic torch. He thought about it a lot—mostly because he imagined his soulmate to be someone who would slot perfectly into his power, someone who was as calm as he was and levelheaded as well. Someone who could handle seven days of emotional floods without breaking a sweat.

But, he knew it was unrealistic to think that way especially as the number of deaths from soulmate related power swaps racked up to at least twenty percent of the population in the past year alone.

Still, Akaashi thought it would be nice to be able to be rid of his abilities for even a single week. He didn’t dislike his power, but, his perpetual exhaustion was something that he could never avoid as long as he had it. Trying to feel neutral all the time in order to stay certain in who he was as a person was not something he enjoyed doing as a hobby.

Rather, it was a necessity.

Well, maybe not anymore.

He stared back at the man with the funky hair who had come up to greet him, a wide grin plastered to his face as if permanently stitched there. The first-year immediately got chills.

“Hey, I’m Bokuto!” the upperclassman grinned, extending a hand, which Akaashi hesitantly reached forward to grab. Then, he near-shouted. “Are you nervous?!”

Akaashi blinked, confused at the way the question was asked immediately after his introduction. In thinking about it, he did feel a little nervous now, but, he was more than certain it was because the other freshmen at the volleyball tryouts were channeling their anxiety through him.

“A little,” he admitted politely, bowing his head and taking the man’s hand. “I’m Akaashi Keiji. I’m trying out for setter.”

Bokuto laughed loudly. Loudly enough that people around them flinched. His golden eyes seemed to dart here and there, never locking firmly on anything. “Ah, cool, cool! I’m super nervous too for some reason which is weird cause I’m only really observing today?”

Akaashi realized it then—and it was probably good that he did because obviously, this man was not the kind of soulmate he had envisioned having. This loud, extroverted upperclassman of his seemed high-strung already, and his power was probably making it worse. It was good Akaashi caught it early.

“Forgive me,” Akaashi started, reaching out to grab Bokuto’s attention. The upperclassman’s focus turned to him, golden eyes searching for answers across the first-year’s face. “I’m sorry, but I think you’ve taken my power.”

Bokuto blinked, seemingly not understanding. “I didn’t even ask if I could take it from you, though.”

Akaashi stared back, equally perplexed. “…what was that?”

“I’m not just going to take your power without permission. I don’t even know what it is,” Bokuto elaborated, brows furrowing. Akaashi was certain there was some kind of miscommunication now.

“No, I—” Akaashi began again. “I think we’re soulmates.”

There was a moment longer before something lit up in Bokuto’s eyes and he was lunging forward, grabbing Akaashi by the shoulders. “Soulmates?! You and me?!” All eyes in the gym turned to them.

“I—” Akaashi stammered, trying to reign in the excitable upperclassman lest they ended up at the center of attention. As if they weren’t already. “I believe so, yes.”

“You’re so… so hot though?!”

Akaashi flushed a deep red. “Wha—”

“Oh crap, don’t—no, don’t, ahh no, don’t be embarrassed, now I’m embarrassed—sorry, that’s not what I,” Bokuto stammered, reaching out and then thinking better of it, pulled back to rake his fingers through his hair. Akaashi followed the movement quietly, watching the man’s triceps pull a little under the tension. He raised an eyebrow.

His soulmate had some firm muscles. Nice.

Fortunately, before he could elaborate on any other thought, the coach stepped forward, addressing Bokuto. “Have you found your soulmate?”

“Yes!” Bokuto near-shouted, turning to face the older man. Akaashi turned to address him as well.

“I am not entirely certain yet, but I no longer sense my own powers,” Akaashi trailed off as he noticed Bokuto surveying him curiously. “…on my person.”

The coach seemed to consider them for a moment before sighing and scratching the back of his head. “Sometimes this kind of stuff happens, but generally we avoid it happening with captains. You’re excused for today Bokuto, and—Akaashi, was it? You’re free to have private tryouts after school tomorrow as long as adjusting to the new powers doesn’t hinder your performance. For now, you’re both excused.”

Akaashi nodded, eyeing Bokuto out of the corner of his eye. Captain, huh?

The upperclassman seemed a bit overwhelmed by the influx of emotions he was probably experiencing, a nervous smile tugging on his face. Akaashi gestured to him and his gaze snapped back to the first-year’s like an owl.

“Shall we, Bokuto-san?” He pointed to outside of the gymnasium, ignoring the curious looks of the others. Bokuto nodded furiously, following after him as Akaashi exited the building.

Once outside, Bokuto visibly relaxed, and he looked less panicked. Unfortunately, he still seemed a bit nervous though, but it was to be expected with how he had suddenly encountered his soulmate on the first day of tryouts when emotions would be high.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi began again, leading them to sit down on a bench under some blossoming trees. “It’s really nice to meet you, finally.”

“Yeah,” Bokuto smiled and this time, it looked more genuine and less forced. “I can’t believe I’m meeting you now—I’m sorry about being nervous, I don’t know why I’m so jittery, usually I’m better than this and I was actually really confident today—”

“It’s no problem, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi cut him off before the man could bite off his own tongue with the speed of his slurred speech. “My powers are very disorienting so I don’t blame you for your nerves.”

Bokuto looked back at him with wide eyes, one leg slung over the seat and the other outside, straddling the bench and leaning towards Akaashi. “What are your powers?” He asked in a barely spoken whisper.

“I’m a type of empath,” Akaashi explained, feeling a bit small under the man’s rapt attention. “I absorb other people’s emotional energy.”

“You absorb it?”

“Yes,” Akaashi reaffirmed, giving Bokuto a patient smile. “I don’t just know how other people feel, I often feel it strongly myself as well.”

“Oh, uh, that’s really cool?” Bokuto said, though he didn’t seem like he thought it was as cool as he said it was.

“What’s your power, Bokuto-san?” Akaashi asked this time, trying to ignore the uncertainty he saw in the upperclassman’s eyes.

“Oh, I, uh, borrow other people’s powers! I can use them once a day.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened slightly in surprise. “Power replication.”

“No, I borrow it! Only for a few minutes and then give it back afterwards.”

“Does the original user lose their power?”

“Yeah!”

Akaashi hummed, slowly understanding. It was less a simple mirroring of powers, but rather, Bokuto took someone else’s powers as his own for a little while, presumably against their will.

“For how long?”

“Hm?”

“How long do you take them?”

“Four minutes!” Bokuto chirped, eyes landing on Akaashi’s face before flitting down, then up at their surroundings. He was a ball of anxious energy. Akaashi wasn’t sure if it was he who was giving Bokuto that nervousness.

“Thank you for the information, Bokuto-san.”

“No problem!” Bokuto redirected his attention to the first-year. “I think my power is pretty cool, so I hope you like it!”

“I’m sure I will. I apologize for my powers—I’m not entirely confident you’ll like mine as much.”

“No, it’s okay! I think it’s cool to know how others feel! Sometimes Konoha says that I can’t read the atmosphere so I think it’s good that I can learn how to!”

Akaashi didn’t know who Konoha was, but he smiled nevertheless. “If you say so.”

Bokuto watched the upturn of Akaashi’s lips before locking eyes with him. “Um, I, uh—do you think we can hold hands?”

The first-year blinked, looking down at Bokuto’s hands that were clenched on the edges of the bench. They did not look as if they were particularly eager to wrap around Akaashi’s own fingers.

“Does…” Akaashi contemplated his next words, watching Bokuto bite down on his lip. The upperclassman was quite apparent in how he felt. Akaashi felt confident that he wouldn’t need his powers to discern the man’s emotional state. “Would that help you with your nerves?”

Bokuto shook his head. “We’re soulmates, right? I want to uh, I think it would be nice. Holding your hand, I mean. You have really pretty fingers.”

Akaashi felt heat rise to his cheeks. “Maybe once we get to know each other better, Bokuto-san.”

“Oh, okay, that’s fine! Wow, I feel so warm, I mean, I’m usually warm so it doesn’t bother me, but—”

Yes, Akaashi was embarrassed, he got that. The first-year cleared his throat, trying to shake off the flush in his face. “It is springtime so, I am sure it is getting warmer.”

“Are you embarrassed, Akaashi?”

The heat he was trying to expel returned full force. Akaashi averted his eyes. “I admit I am a little nervous about the prospect of holding hands with you, my senior.”

Bokuto seemed to embolden at the title, puffing his chest up slightly. “It’s okay, I’m nervous too!”

Akaashi wasn’t sure how he could explain that Bokuto’s anxiety was quite possibly an extension of his own. As it was his power, Akaashi had enough time to be able to discern his emotions from that of his peers. He wasn’t sure if Bokuto was able to do the same just yet.

The first-year turned away, bringing his fingers together. “I’m glad that my performance will be the same as always for tryouts. In fact, it may even be better without my powers to distract me.”

“That’s great! Did you want me to ask coach if I can watch?”

“No, that’s quite alright, Bokuto-san. I understand you have your own responsibilities as captain.”

“I do, but, also,” Bokuto pressed, those golden eyes burning into the side of Akaashi’s head. “You’re my soulmate so I want to support you.”

“Thank you,” Akaashi murmured quietly, though the words were directed to his hands rather than to his upperclassman’s face directly. It was expected that those connected by fate would come to help each other, regardless of the amount of time they spent prior. “I would also like to get to know you better and support you as well.”

Bokuto beamed, leaning back against the bench, tension leaving his shoulders. “Man, Akaashi, you’re so cool.”

“Is that how you see me?”

“Well, yeah! I mean, this happened on your first day of practice and I know if it was me, I would have been a hundred times more nervous than I am now, especially if I was meeting my soulmate, yaknow?”

“I didn’t plan to meet my soulmate today, Bokuto-san.”

“Aghaashi, you know that’s not what I meant,” Bokuto pouted, and Akaashi couldn’t help but find it strangely endearing. “What I mean is—you’re really cool and I’m glad that we could be soulmates together!”

Akaashi thought it was too soon to make those judgments, but he withheld his opinions on the matter for his upperclassman’s sake. He also refused to acknowledge whatever that horrendous pronunciation of his name was. “I am grateful for the opportunity as well.”

Bokuto grinned as if he had just won the lottery and pumped his fist into the air enthusiastically. “Yes, my soulmate likes me!”

That wasn’t what he had said, but Akaashi exhaled with a smile on his lips. “That is yet to be seen. I look forward to working with you, Bokuto-san.”

“Yeah, you got it Akaashi!”

For the sake of both their wellbeing, Akaashi hoped the week progressed smoothly enough. And, Akaashi admitted that maybe, for the sake of Bokuto’s bright smile too, it would go even better than just adequate.

The first day went off without a hitch.

After all, tryouts for volleyball were in the afternoon so Akaashi only had to look forward to going home, doing his homework, and then heading to bed.

Bokuto had insisted that they walk home together and to the first-year’s surprise, they lived only a short distance from one another. It would still take a good fifteen minutes to go from Akaashi’s house to Bokuto’s, but, it was definitely closer than he would have imagined for Tokyo.

The entire walk back, Bokuto vibrated with a certain excess energy. Akaashi had assumed as much when they had first met, but his upperclassman was an excitable person. Ignoring his interesting choice in hairstyle, Bokuto naturally gravitated towards people and with Akaashi’s powers, sapped up their emotional energies just as easily. In fact, if Bokuto was as charismatic of a person as he presented without Akaashi’s powers, then the second-year was even more of a sociable individual with them.

He quickly learned not to blatantly blurt out how others felt by the end of their stroll, but greeted strangers cheerily, paying special care to those he knew were feeling bad. A simple smile and ‘I hope you have a nice day!’ turned many passerby frowns into carefully considered nods, and Akaashi was certain that by the time they reached his house, Bokuto had at least uplifted the spirits of a dozen different people.

It was kind of amazing.

After Bokuto wished him a goodnight and left, Akaashi was left to wonder how long it had been since he had last cared about how strangers felt. Once his powers had manifested, he had learned how to drown out the weight of excess emotions. Yet, Bokuto, with his charming personality seemed to embrace all those pressures easily.

Maybe he had been doing it wrong the whole time.

Regardless, Akaashi was glad that the perfect soulmate he envisioned didn’t actually exist because there was something about the power that matched perfectly with Bokuto. Now that he had met his actual soulmate, the first-year couldn’t really imagine anyone else using it as he did.

That night, Akaashi lay in bed and thought about Bokuto and his warm, kind, inviting presence. The first-year was still fairly indifferent to the soulmate concept as a whole, but, he felt that if he got to experience it with the second-year, it probably wouldn’t be too bad.

Akaashi sincerely hoped that out of all the soulmates that met every year, he and Bokuto would beat the odds and come out of the week unscathed. Technically, if twenty percent of the population were fatally wounded, then eighty percent were perfectly okay. Akaashi hoped they were in the majority.

With that thought, Akaashi resolved himself to look forward to the rest of the week. It was only as he drifted off to sleep that he noticed he hadn’t tried Bokuto’s powers because he had been so focused on his own all day.

Bokuto showed up at his house that morning, backpack slung over his shoulders.

With that unfazed grin and those bright eyes, Akaashi was absolutely certain he was a morning person.

Unfortunately, the first-year wasn’t.

“Bokuto-san, did we agree on an arrangement I wasn’t aware of?” Akaashi frowned, rubbing at his eyes sleepily.

“Oh—” Bokuto seemed to deflate and he at least had the tact to look worried. “I’m, uh oh, you’re upset. I thought it would be nice if we walked to school together!”

Akaashi looked back into the kitchen where he could read the time on the clock. “School does not begin for another hour, Bokuto-san.”

“I wanted to be ready, just in case!” Bokuto responded, though he still sounded a bit subdued. He probably felt Akaashi’s annoyance. If this was how the entire week was going to go, then Akaashi was now more than certain that they might end up killing one another.

As if in response to his thoughts, Bokuto lifted up a plastic bag and a steaming coffee cup that Akaashi hadn’t noticed. “I brought breakfast?”

Akaashi stared at the goodies and his expression softened, stepping back to allow Bokuto into his house. He was more than glad that his parents had the night shift at the hospital and were sleeping in their bedroom because he didn’t know how he would explain a strange-looking man entering their home at the crack of dawn.

He also wasn’t sure how to justify letting someone he had met less than twenty-four hours prior into his private abode, but, he blamed that one on his morning drowsiness.

Bokuto seemed to perk up a little, entering the house and following Akaashi to the kitchen where he placed his offerings on the small island there. Akaashi pulled up two chairs and then sat in one, watching Bokuto rummage through the plastic noisily.

Good thing his parents were heavy sleepers.

“I just picked up some onigiri from the convenience store on the way! I didn’t know what kind you liked so I just got everything,” Bokuto was saying, placing containers in front of Akaashi. Akaashi eyed each one, a glint in his eyes. Bokuto handed him a pair of chopsticks, grinning. “You feel hungry.”

It was more of a statement than a question because there was no doubt that Akaashi was starving. What he wanted more than sleep right now was a good meal and he had originally planned to heat up some leftovers from the fridge for breakfast.

Now, he was sitting in front of an entire buffet worth of rice balls.

Having a soulmate was great.

As he looked over to see Bokuto sit in the chair across from him, a goofy grin plastered to his face, his arms folded to rest on top of the counter, biceps in full view, Akaashi had to reiterate it.

Yeah, it was great.

“Thank you for the meal,” Akaashi said as he dug in, watching as Bokuto did the same.

The two of them quickly finished nearly thirty different types of onigiri platters. In a record eighteen minutes, the only proof left of their meal were the empty containers strewn across the island.

“Oh my god, Akaashi, I had no idea you could eat so much!”

Akaashi put down his chopsticks. “I want to work on forming more muscles so I eat accordingly.” It wasn’t a lie, but the amount of carbs he consumed probably would have the opposite effect. “Thank you for breakfast, Bokuto-san.”

“No problem, Akaashi!” Bokuto beamed, very content with himself. “We can do it every day if you want!”

“I would not want your wallet to suffer.”

“Oh, I guess you’re right,” Bokuto admitted, putting his own chopsticks down as well. He hummed in thought. “Maybe one other time this week, or next week, or whenever! Cause like, we have forever, right?”

Forever. Akaashi felt warmer at the thought, but he wanted to stay objective. “That is true, but, keep in mind, Bokuto-san, there are many soulmates who do not end up making it throughout the week to see that forever. And, although there are some who do, the seven-day trauma is too much for them to bear and they end up separating regardless.”

“Yeah, but, we’re not just anyone, right? We can beat the odds!”

“With all due respect, you hardly know me, Bokuto-san.”

“That’s not true!” Bokuto retorted, bringing up his fingers to count on them. “You have curly hair and green eyes, and you’re a setter. You can probably out-eat me in an eating competition, and you have pretty fingers. You’re a great listener and you explain things super well! That’s at least five things!”

“Yes,” Akaashi smiled down at his hands, feeling a softness in his chest. Were they really that pretty? “That is definitely at least five things.”

“Oh, and you’re cranky in the mornings!”

Akaashi snorted. “I am. Let’s not do this kind of thing too often.”

Bokuto eyes lit up. “You laughed! It’s really cute!”

Akaashi blushed hard, trying to redirect the subject. “We should get to school, Bokuto-san.”

“Aw, okay!” Bokuto whined, though it didn’t sound too serious. He shouldered his bag, and gathered up their trash in the plastic bag. “You really are cute though…”

“You normally would not call a man over 180 centimeters cute, Bokuto-san.”

“But you are!”

“Please do not use my own powers against me. It should be clear I am very…” Akaashi rifled through his word choices before selecting one that felt appropriate. “Unsettled.”

“You’re embarrassed,” Bokuto sing-sang, smiling.

“You have no proof.”

“Sure, Akaashi,” Bokuto waggled his eyebrows and Akaashi’s lip twitched as he bit back another laugh, bringing his hands up to cover his mouth. His upperclassman was being ridiculous and yet, Akaashi was falling into stride with his antics, reveling in the wide, sunny smiles Bokuto gave. It was silly, given that they hadn’t even known of each other’s existences until recently.

Maybe it was easier to fall for his soulmate.

And, despite not being any sort of romantic his whole life, Akaashi sort of, kind of hoped so.

For Bokuto’s sake.

School was fine.

In fact, it was probably more than fine.

Akaashi was used to redirecting all the emotions flying around him, from his classmates, to his teachers, to drama talked about randomly on the streets or on television. But now, it was peaceful.

He could focus entirely on his studies without simultaneously squashing feelings of panic or anger or whatever his peers chose to feel that day and for once in his life, he felt truly free. All he felt was his own emotions which were controlled and predictable, and familiar.

It was invigorating.

This sense of control carried with him throughout the day until private tryouts where he met with the coach as the rest of the Fukurodani team were doing warmups.

Naturally, he excelled there too.

“You’re a high-quality setter and the team definitely needs someone like you,” the coach was saying, though Akaashi could barely hear him through the high he was experiencing.

“Thank you, coach,” Akaashi responded curtly, though his hands shook with anticipation.

Akaashi knew his powers had always hindered him rather than helped him. There were times they were beneficial, but most of the time, they served to deter him from his goals, flood him with emotions he had no control over.

To be free of that burden for even a few days was a rush of liberation.

He felt as if his whole world had flipped—he was better able to feel things as he wanted on his own terms. He could be happy when he wanted to and prideful without worry. He could experience sadness, anger, and jealousy as anyone else did, emotions that came from within and not from those around him.

Akaashi kind of wished this swap lasted forever, especially because Bokuto seemed happier for it as well.

Turning to find the captain in the midst of the team, Akaashi immediately located the upperclassman as he took a running leap towards the net, narrowly missing the ball with a spike.

“Bokuto, calm down!”

“I, sorry, sorry, just a bit jittery!”

“Obviously!”

Akaashi observed the exchange quietly, a thread of worry winding its way around his heart. Despite how Bokuto acted around others outside of the court, it was clear that Akaashi’s powers were messing with him in games. The first-year only hoped it was a problem that would be resolved as more time passed.

“Bokuto-san!”

Bokuto swiveled around to locate Akaashi next to the coach. The first-year smiled softly in response as the captain jogged up to meet up with him.

“I passed.”

“You did?!” Bokuto bellowed, smacking Akaashi across the back in what the freshman assumed was a supportive gesture. “That’s amazing, Akaashi! You’re incredible!”

“Thank you, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi responded, and he genuinely felt the gratitude from the top of his head to the bottom of his toes. He knew that on top of feeling grateful for getting a spot on the team, he was also feeling it for the power swap as well.

Whether or not that thankfulness registered with Bokuto, Akaashi didn’t know, but, the captain definitely killed quite a few setups from their reserve setter all the way until practice concluded.

It made Akaashi feel even better about the loss of his powers, especially knowing that this happiness came solely from himself and no one else.

Well, that was a bit of an understatement.

Some of it probably came from Bokuto as well.

It was a bit of a romantic notion he began to fancy, that whenever Bokuto lit up like a Christmas tree and ran around the school with that uncontrolled enthusiasm, Akaashi couldn’t help but feel as if he was absorbing the man’s emotional state as well.

Only this time, he was absorbing the emotional state of just one other person besides himself. Despite the addition, it was still something he felt comfortable with, and it allowed him the freedom to release some of the tension from constantly managing the entire world’s wants all the time.

Akaashi found himself admitting even after practice and after they had walked back home together as if they had been doing it for years, that if he only felt things for himself and for Bokuto, that would be fine.

He didn’t want to feel for anyone else.

And, when Bokuto nervously asked him for his number outside his door that night so they could figure out plans for the weekend together, Akaashi gave in easily.

Maybe the next time Bokuto asked to hold hands, he would give in then as well.

Chapter Text

It was Saturday morning and there was a man standing at his door.

A homeless man, to be exact. At nine o’ clock in the flipping morning.

The way his raven hair curtained over his face made it look as if it had never been combed a single time in his entire life. He had a snarky look on his face that screamed ‘I’m-going-to-extort-you-for-money-with-some-unbelievable-sob-story-about-how-I-ended-up-on-the-streets,’ and Akaashi knew that even if he retreated back into the safety of his home, the tall, conniving man would find some way to wheedle his way into Akaashi’s life even if it was to mess with his conscience.

So, obviously, there was only one course of action.

“Yes?” Akaashi asked curtly, ready to bail and call the cops if necessary. At the very least, the man looked presentable (other than the wreckage of hair on his head) with a short-sleeved dress shirt that looked like a high schooler’s and gray slacks. “Can I help you?”

“You Akaashi?” He smirked, and Akaashi was uncertain how it was possible for this man to look even cockier than he originally presented. He looked around a little and scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. “Guess Bo’s not here yet.”

“Kuroo-san?”

“That’s me!”

Ah, of course.

Bokuto had messaged Akaashi last night about a friend tagging along to their date. Akaashi hadn’t been too keen on the idea as this was time for them to get to know each other as soulmates , but Bokuto had asserted that it would be fun so Akaashi had given him the benefit of the doubt. Needless to say, the upperclassman gave no further detail than an ambiguous ‘he looks like a cat and people are scared of him for some reason, but Kuroo’s a good guy!’

Akaashi stared at him a moment longer.

He did look like a cat. Granted, a mangy, flea-ridden, feral cat, but still a cat so he’ll give Bokuto some kudos for that. Akaashi had no idea what kind of abilities the man would have, but, if it was looking unkempt, he nailed it on the head. Akaashi gave the friend a slight bow in acknowledgement.

Kuroo bit back a laugh—Akaashi wasn’t sure what he was laughing about, but he waited until the man got it out of his system before addressing him.

“Are you a second-year as well, Kuroo-san?”

“Yeah, I go to Nekoma—yaknow, your rival school.” Kuroo added, wriggling his eyebrows. Why the second-year found that necessary, Akaashi had no idea.

“I see,” Akaashi said, stepping back. “Would you like to—”

“Nah, it’s fine!” Kuroo replied hastily. “I don’t want this to be weird. I’m just here to help Bo. He should be here soon, he’s probably just running late.”

As if on cue, loud footsteps approached until the two heard a loud, “Sorry, sorry, I’m late!”

Rounding the corner, hair slicked back instead of spiked up, Bokuto came into view, bomber jacket, dark blue jeans, and all. Even before their eyes locked on one another, Akaashi found himself staring.

Kuroo whistled. “Nice, bro.”

Bokuto laughed nervously, patting the stray strands on top of his head gently. “Y-you think?”

Before Kuroo could butt in with another bro comment, Akaashi spoke up. “You look very nice, Bokuto-san.”

The effect that comment had on Bokuto’s transparent self-esteem was instantaneous. He perked up, and stood taller, walking over to greet them with a skip in his step. His eyes skimmed over Kuroo for a long moment before stilling on Akaashi.

“Akaashi,” Bokuto breathed, stopping in his tracks. “You look beautiful.”

“What—” Akaashi stammered, furrowing his brows. “Don’t be ridiculous, Bokuto-san, I’ve only put on a nice jacket—you’ve gone all out with—” His fingers reached up to grasp strands of Bokuto’s hair, tucking one piece behind his ear. It felt soft in his hands and he wondered what it would feel like to brush through all of his soulmate’s hair. “…this.”

“Y-yeah, but you’re always pretty!”

“You’re over-exaggerating.”

“I’m really not!” Bokuto asserted, then he turned to Kuroo. “Dude, can you stop that?”

“What? I haven’t done anything.” Kuroo snickered, shrugging.

Akaashi looked between the two, not entirely understanding. He glanced at Bokuto’s hand for a moment before clearing his throat and addressing both of them.

“Shall we go?”

Bokuto nodded enthusiastically, grinning that wide smile of his and setting off towards the bus station. Kuroo kept up with him easily while Akaashi trailed behind them.

It wasn’t long before Akaashi felt like he was the third wheel.

He wasn’t particularly happy about Bokuto inviting his friend to begin with, but, with the way the two of them walked side-by-side chatting as if they hadn’t seen each other in years—Akaashi couldn’t help feeling envious.

It was silly, perhaps. They were only joking around with each other as bros did, making snide jabs and teasing each other over silly things, but Akaashi thought that this was his time with his soulmate. His time with Bokuto.

Not Kuroo’s.

And, that was definitely not something he thought of himself as—a jealous person. Yet, there he was, walking behind the two second-years, a feeling of possessiveness and anxiety building from the depths of his core.

He had been really happy to see his phone buzz with incoming messages for the weekend. He had been really happy to talk about their plans—getting some ice cream at a nearby park, visiting a zoo, and going bowling afterwards. He had been really happy with Bokuto overall. Many of their interests seemed to align and with every incoming text Akaashi got, he felt himself more and more enamored with the idea of having a soulmate.

Now, he felt his reality crashing down on him and all the horror stories of meeting your destined lover flashed through his mind.

Honestly, even if this week didn’t end in heartbreak and disaster, at least Bokuto had someone he was compatible with outside of the whole soulmate ordeal. Akaashi wasn’t sure he could say the same for himself.

“What about you, Akaashi?”

Akaashi blinked as he was shoved away from his train of thoughts. “Hm?”

Kuroo stared back at him, expression unreadable. “Your favorite ice cream flavor?”

“I was telling Kuroo that I told you that the ice cream guy has all kinds of flavors so he’ll definitely have your favorite! Green tea, right!?”

Akaashi felt a warmth in his chest at the small piece of information Bokuto had gleaned from their conversation the other night. He nodded, looking down to pick at his fingers. “Yes, that is my favorite.”

“Woohoo!” Bokuto cheered, pumping his fist into the air. Akaashi couldn’t help but feel pulled into his enthusiasm and he smiled, catching up to them.

“And, your favorite is chocolate, right, Bokuto-san?”

“Yup! Gosh, you know everything , Akaashi!”

Akaashi exhaled. “You knew my favorite too, Bokuto-san.”

“Yeah, but, ice cream is easy!”

“That doesn’t—” Akaashi huffed in exasperation, hiding a smile behind his hands. “That doesn’t even make sense, Bokuto-san.”

“Sure it does, ‘Kaash—you see—“

So Akaashi listened to Bokuto’s long and very illogical explanation of why knowing someone’s favorite ice cream flavors was not the same as knowing their favorite color or their favorite smell or their favorite number because clearly , there were differences and knowing someone’s favorite ice cream flavors was ranked at least higher than knowing their favorite flower, but lower than knowing their favorite music.

And, through it all, as they got on the bus and made their way to their destination, Akaashi hummed along, listening to the fascinating way his upperclassman categorized the world, and feeling as if he wouldn’t mind learning this list eventually—from top to bottom.

By the time they reached the park with the ice cream vendor, Bokuto had made it to at least forty items on said list before he stopped suddenly, looking down at the grass. Akaashi paused as well, turning to look at him.

“Bokuto-san?”

“Ah, sorry, Akaashi, I didn’t mean to talk about that for so long, sometimes when I’m nervous I just start talking and I can’t stop and I think I’m just really nervous about being here with you—”

“Bo,” Kuroo spoke up and Akaashi nearly startled because he had honestly forgotten the man had been following them the whole time.

“Ugh, I know, I know, I got it,” Bokuto grumbled, shaking his head and smacking his cheeks a few times.

“If it’s any consolation,” Akaashi began, uncertain of when to jump in on this unspoken conversation between the two upperclassmen. He wasn’t positive he was reading the situation clearly, but he at least knew Bokuto was feeling nervous made obvious in his mannerisms. “I enjoyed your list of favorite things, Bokuto-san.”

“Really?” Bokuto peeked through his fingers at Akaashi.

“Really.”

Bokuto buried his head in his hands again, wiping his face vigorously. When he pulled away, he looked at Akaashi with those bright, golden eyes.

“Man… you’re the best, Akaashi.”

Akaashi wanted to say he hadn’t done anything, but he wasn’t sure what he could safely say to keep Bokuto in a good mood so he kept silent, staring down at the floor. If Kuroo had any comments, he kept them to himself.

The three of them made their way to the ice cream vendor and as Bokuto had promised, there was a wide variety of flavors on display in the cart. With Bokuto’s insistent invitation to pick all he wanted, Akaashi shamelessly selected not only green tea, but, cookie dough, pistachio with almonds, and napoleon. With the way Kuroo’s eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets, Akaashi felt as if he got some payback for the mental fatigue the cat-like man had put him through all morning.

“I want four flavors too!” Bokuto chirped, leaning over the cart and nearly knocking the vendor over. Thankfully, the middle-aged man seemed to be used to this behavior, mumbling something or another about ‘hyperactive kids.’

After Bokuto selected his flavors—chocolate, chocolate chip, double fudge, and rocky road— and threw money at the vendor, Kuroo paid for his own small cone of mint chocolate chip.

“That’s it?” Akaashi asked.

“Seeing you guys eat that much makes me queasy,” Kuroo shrugged, that same infuriating grin on his face. “I’m good with this. Though—I’ll never understand napoleon ice cream.”

“You don’t have to understand it,” Akaashi responded smoothly, taking a lick. “There’s none for you.”

“Wow, you are rude , aren’t you—”

“Akaashi, let me have a bite!”

Bokuto leaned over without an affirmation, and although Akaashi resented sharing his food with anyone , he figured that Bokuto did pay for it so he was allowed to try some if he wanted to and it totally wasn’t that weird that he wanted to try new flavors, and wow—Akaashi was really trying to justify how okay he was with this.

After taking a few bites—yes, literal bites—Bokuto yanked his head back, mouthing ‘hot—wait, no—cold, cold—’ and Akaashi followed the curves of his lips, the way they inhaled each sticky morsel of ice cream around a red, red tongue and the way they gleamed as if glazed with sugar.

Akaashi swallowed. Hard.

Kuroo chuckled next to them and Akaashi turned away, scarlet. Bokuto whipped his head around to face his friend, expression indignant.

“What?”

“Nothing, nothing,” Kuroo hummed, looking away. “Your boyfriend must’ve been hungry.”

Akaashi ignored that double meaning.

“I told you he eats a lot!” Bokuto exclaimed, and he looked overjoyed with the fact. “I don’t know how he does it, it’s incredible!”

The two of them fell back into casual banter and Akaashi felt his shoulders slump in relaxation. Kuroo was a bit of an annoyance, but he was fine company. Akaashi still felt a little like he was stuck between two old friends, but it wasn’t as bad as their walk here.

It was kind of nice, to be honest.

He knew he would have to get more acquainted with Kuroo, but in the meantime, Akaashi was certain that this date wasn’t all bad.

The ice cream and Bokuto were the positives.

Kuroo was… well, he was on the fence for now. He at least didn’t seem to be there to ruin their date.

Though, his comments were greatly unappreciated.

They ate their cones by the side of the lake, talking lightly about all sorts of things, though it was mostly Bokuto telling Akaashi a story, roping Kuroo into continuing the story, and cutting Kuroo off in the midst of his explanation here and there. Akaashi listened attentively, mostly to Bokuto because Kuroo made it a point to not say anything unless prompted which Akaashi was grateful for.

In the end, it was a day for them after all.

The three of them stayed that way until Kuroo reminded Bokuto about the zoo and suddenly, Bokuto was up on his feet waving two tickets in Akaashi’s face.

“We have to see the owls, Akaashi!”

“That sounds fun, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said, getting to his feet and taking a ticket stub. “Will Kuroo-san be joining us as well?”

“He has to buy his own ticket,” Bokuto replied, as Kuroo groaned from the floor.

“We’ve seen those owls at least four hundred times, man.”

“But, I haven’t seen them with Akaashi before!” Bokuto turned to Akaashi. “Have you seen them before?”

“I don’t believe so.”

“Oh man, they’re so cute! They’re in this big enclosure and people with giant gloves go to take care of them. When they fly, their wings get super wide like, like, and I got to pet one before! His head was so soft and he had fluffy, tall horns—”

Akaashi smiled, imagining Bokuto’s usual hairstyle, hair gelled up in spikes. The second-year probably closely resembled an owl himself, in all honesty.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

Bokuto cheered once more and Kuroo sighed in resignation, though he also got up to leave as well. Akaashi glanced at Bokuto’s hands again, but thought better of it, following the second-year’s lead once he started heading towards the bus stop again.

Once they got on, they transferred one line, but it wasn’t long before they reached the zoo that Bokuto was talking about. It wasn’t a large zoo by Tokyo standards, but it seemed well-kept, a cheery ‘Welcome!’ sign at the front surrounded by pictures of smiling children in hard hats holding apples.

Bokuto nearly rammed into the front desk with his ticket and the attendant there took the stub apprehensively. Akaashi followed behind, handing the girl his as well, and Kuroo purchased one, but not without getting friendly with the worker.

Akaashi turned to Bokuto as they entered the park. “Has Kuroo-san met his soulmate yet?”

Shoving his stamped ticket into his bag, Bokuto blinked, confused. “No, why?”

“He seems awfully close with that woman.” Maybe it wasn’t his place to judge. Plenty of people forego the soulmate ordeal entirely in favor of preserving their lives.

Bokuto looked over to see Kuroo laughing with the girl at the booth, and she giggled while stamping his stub. He shrugged. “Nah, he’s just like that. He knows people really well so he’s super sociable, yaknow?”

Akaashi thought Bokuto was a lot more sociable than pain-in-the-ass Kuroo-san, but, he wasn’t going to press the issue. Maybe Kuroo’s abilities made him more aggravating than the average human being. He shrugged as he didn’t really know Kuroo—at least, as well as Bokuto seemed to—and stayed silent as said man jogged up to them, a grin on his face.

“Guess what, Bo?”

“What? I don’t want to know about another date you turned down—”

“No, no, you can pet some owls today!” Kuroo cut in, looking quite proud of himself.

And, honestly, with the way that Bokuto’s face lit up, Akaashi let him feel proud because anything was worth getting to see the life in Bokuto’s eyes, and the sharp intake of breath.

“Really?!”

“Yeah, I told that girl you were with your soulmate and it has been your life dream to pet owls with your soulmate—your sOWLmate—and that if you didn’t get to, you would surely perish before the week is over, and she took pity on you. Though, I’m sure half of it was because of my witty pun. She said most of the owls will be asleep, but, one of them has had weird sleeping patterns for a while so you guys can pet that one.”

So, it was clear that the ‘I’m-going-to-extort-you-for-money-with-some-unbelievable-sob-story-about-how-I-ended-up-on-the-streets’ vibe Akaashi got from Kuroo wasn’t completely off.

“Oh my god, bro, you’re the best .”

“Of course,” Kuroo laughed.

And, maybe that shouldn’t have hurt Akaashi as much as it did, but it did because maybe Bokuto thought everyone around him was the best and there wasn’t a deeper meaning behind him calling Akaashi the best. Kuroo was his best friend so obviously there were months of memories that he had probably made with him that were more precious than the mere moments of times they’ve spent together for the past three days. It only made sense, after all. It shouldn’t have hurt.

“But, Akaashi is the bestest.”

And, maybe, Akaashi needed to believe in Bokuto a little more.

Akaashi reached forward and intertwined his fingers with his upperclassman, squeezing them lightly. He could feel his hands shake with anxiety, but, the way Bokuto’s eyes widened and the ends of his mouth stretched far enough to reach his ears made it worth it.

“Let’s go see the owls, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said quietly, feeling a bit self-conscious about the warmth spreading across his cheeks. He felt Bokuto’s palm in his hand, and he took note of how much longer his fingers were in comparison to the second-year’s. He wondered if it was strange for Bokuto—being the taller of the two to have smaller hands. He wondered if he should let go.

Bokuto laughed an affirmation, loud and clear, and the sound expelled any doubts Akaashi had about anything, ever.

That was a senseless notion.

Akaashi adored it.

“Wow, get a room,” Kuroo voiced, although he too looked satisfied with the turn of events.

With Bokuto’s hand firmly in his, Akaashi followed the signs to the owl exhibit, though it was mostly Bokuto leading the way. Once they arrived, Bokuto pried his grip away and Akaashi immediately missed the warmth.

“Look, Akaashi!” Bokuto called whisper-yelling, pointing to a dark-colored bird beyond the glass that looked quite done with the world. “That one is my favorite! Her name is Strix!”

Akaashi hummed, looking around at the other owls who were either completely asleep or half-awake. They seemed to be separated by species with some owls isolated in large, open areas. He spotted a black and white horned owl and pointed to it. “Then, that one’s my favorite.”

Bokuto bounded over, struggling to keep his voice down. “His name is Bubo! He’s really cool!”

Akaashi thought Bokuto was plenty cool himself, but he didn’t voice his opinions. Kuroo snickered behind them, but Akaashi chose to ignore him.

For the sake of his own sanity.

“Hi everyone!” Someone Akaashi assumed was a bird-keeper exited a backroom that was melted into the green of the walls to greet them. “My name is Mrs. Suzumeda. Who’re the lucky soulmates here?”

Bokuto uncharacteristically seemed to shrink with embarrassment, but Kuroo pushed the two of them forward. “These lovebirds right here, ma’am.”

“Great!” She said, beaming at them and Akaashi felt as if he were the ones on display rather than the animals. “Now, we’re going to need to go over a couple of rules—you’re going to want to pet down the feathers on their head, don’t pet upwards—they don’t like that. You don’t want to make any sudden noises, owls actually get spooked very easily and—”

Akaashi took note of all the guidelines to follow and they were fairly simple. Basically, don’t be an asshole and respect the animal. He assumed that the entire step-by-step introduction was mainly for children who threw their hands all over wild animals and had no regard for personal space.

He didn’t even have to wonder about whether or not the excitable Bokuto would adhere to the bird-keeper’s instructions because the second-year was listening intently with such fierce focus Akaashi would have assumed it was the first time the man had ever seen an owl. When the woman asked them to repeat the rules back to her, they did so easily and with no trouble at all.

“Awesome! Alright, now, if you’ll step this way—”

The two followed her into the backroom and out into the clearing where some of the birds were sleeping. They silently approached a barn owl who swiveled its head around to greet them.

“This here is Alba,” she said, demonstrating the petting technique she had verbally taught them. “She really likes being pet on the face so try to pet her there. Her sleeping schedule is a bit off because of a recent move—we’re close to fixing it, but that’s why she’s awake now.” She turned to them, brandishing a brown glove. “Who wants to hold her?”

“Bokuto-san, you can hold her,” Akaashi offered, knowing how much the second-year wanted this all day. He stepped back and allowed Mrs. Suzumeda to fit the mitt over and onto Bokuto’s hand.

It happened in an instant.

Alba seemed to understand what was happening and hopped onto Bokuto’s arm. Bokuto stared, as if enraptured by the sight, then turned to the glass display to Kuroo, a tentative smile on his face.

He looked as if he was saying ‘I have an actual owl on my arm!’

Which, he did.

Kuroo gave him a lazy thumbs up.

But what was the most incredible was how quickly the owl took to him. When Bokuto extended the fingers of his other hand to the bird to pet its face, Alba seemed to enjoy the light brushing, even going out of her way to nibble at the man’s fingers.

Honestly, it looked as if Bokuto was meant to be there, an owl perched on his arm.

“Akaashi, look,” Bokuto breathed, as if Akaashi wasn’t watching him tend to his new friend through the sparkle in his brilliant golden eyes. “She likes me.”

Akaashi gently reached out a hand that Alba considered for a moment. Then, ever so softly, Akaashi began to stroke the sides of Alba’s white face. The owl leaned into the touch.

In an even quieter whisper, “She likes you .”

‘I think I like you ,’ Akaashi thought.

Then, as an afterthought, Akaashi hoped Kuroo wasn’t watching.

The first-year turned to the glass and found the bedhead was nowhere in sight. His shoulders slumped in relief and in turn, he saw the tension from Bokuto’s face melt away as well.

They stayed like that for an indeterminate amount of time before Mrs. Suzumeda coaxed the bird away from them and onto a nearby branch with the promise of food. Once Alba was occupied, she led them out of the clearing and back through the door.

Kuroo was nowhere to be seen so Akaashi took the opportunity to grab onto Bokuto’s hand as the second-year started rambling about the owls as soon as they left the exhibit.

“She was so beautiful, Akaashi, oh my gosh, and the way she blinked her eyes and the white fur around her face, her feathers were so soft and the way she nibbled on my fingers, it was absolutely incredible, wow—” then, “Did you like it, Akaashi?”

Akaashi nodded, smiling fondly. “Yes, I did, Bokuto-san.”

“And when you started petting her, she was just so happy, did you see how happy she was, Aghaashi?? Well, she was so happy and I was really happy that I got to pet her and watch you pet her, and you were like super in love with her and I was too—”

“Took you two long enough,” a familiar drawl cut him off and the two found Kuroo at the entrance, arms folded, leaning against the wall.

“Kuroo, I thought you left!”

“We still have bowling, remember,” Kuroo reminded him, then placed both hands on his hips. “Unless you wanted to tour around the rest of the zoo.”

Bokuto blinked, then looked at Akaashi for confirmation. “What do you want to do ‘Kaashi?”

Akaashi hummed. “I would not mind seeing the rest of the zoo since we came all this way.”

“Okay!” Bokuto exclaimed, smiling brightly. “We can see the rest of the zoo!”

So, they did just that.

With Bokuto and Akaashi leading the way, hand-in-hand, the three of them visited the rest of the exhibits. They saw the bears, the lions, the elephants, and the pandas. Akaashi wasn’t a wildlife expert, but he was glad to see that they were all kept in open-range environments rather than in cages like he feared. Kuroo seemed particularly infatuated with the giraffes which was strange given that the panthers looked more like him.

But, Akaashi couldn’t judge too harshly given that Kuroo had given them space at the owl exhibit. That was strangely kind of him to do so, though Akaashi would have preferred more consistency in that consideration. Leaving the two of them on their own for their date would have been highly appreciated from the start.

Thankfully, the heavens seemed to hear his call.

“Ah, shoot,” Kuroo grumbled, swiping at his phone in agitation. Akaashi ignored him to survey the hippos, but Bokuto left his side to lean over his friend’s shoulder.

“What’s up?”

“I think Kenma got himself banned from another GameGo,” Kuroo sighed, frowning at his text messages before pocketing the device into his bag. “He needs me to bail—I’m going to have to cut this date short.”

Bokuto looked crestfallen. “Now?”

“Hey, no worries man, you got two out of three things you wanted to get done down so now you just have to go bowling and then take Akaashi home, right? You got it,” Kuroo assured him, patting him on the shoulder. “You don’t need me for that.”

“But—”

“Bo, you got this, don’t worry about it!” His phone made another loud buzzing sound from his bag and Kuroo turned to wince at it. “Okay, but really, I got to go, Kenma’s too young to go to jail.”

With that, Kuroo waved them farewell and jogged out of sight. Bokuto stared after him forlornly and Akaashi felt as if he needed to get things back to normal again. He cleared his throat.

“So, um, does Kuroo-san have a delinquent friend I should know about?”

Bokuto startled, looking back at Akaashi nervously and laughing. “Nah, it’s his childhood friend. He’s pretty chill, but, if you mess with his video games, he will probably kill you.”

“That’s… concerning,” Akaashi replied after a moment of thought. “Should I be worried?”

Bokuto smiled and this time, it looked more genuine. “He hasn’t killed anyone yet so, no?”

Akaashi raised an eyebrow and Bokuto chuckled.

“No, definitely no.”

“Alright, if you say so.”

Bokuto nodded, pulling at some stray strands of his hair. “So, um, late lunch?”

“That would be nice,” Akaashi admitted. It was half past three.

“Lunch!” Bokuto said, louder and with more confidence. Akaashi exhaled and reached for Bokuto’s hands once more. Bokuto flinched at the contact at first, but otherwise, seemed just as normal as before Kuroo had left.

Except, Bokuto got progressively more jittery as the day continued. As he was paying for their sandwiches at the stand, he spilled all his coins over the counter, and as he brought the food back to their table, he nearly tripped and sent their meals straight into Akaashi’s face.

Luckily, Akaashi caught him before Bokuto could do so, but the stacking incidents only seemed to further dishearten the second-year.  After their strained lunch of forced conversation, he went on further to accidentally push a kindergartener into a puddle, drop his water bottle into the pit of snakes, and knock over an entire souvenir stand.

Akaashi didn’t even know how the last one was possible. He thought those things were bolted to the floor.

“Bokuto-san,” he ventured after they had helped the manager clean up the mess. He understood that somehow, somehow the second-year’s anxiety had skyrocketed since Kuroo left. Which, didn’t make sense to him to be honest—Bokuto had acted fine when he was alone with Akaashi at the owl exhibit. He was also fine on the way to the entrance to meet with Kuroo. Was Kuroo’s presence really that necessary? “Shall we go to the bowling alley now?”

“Akaashi,” Bokuto whined from the floor a short distance from the souvenir stands as Akaashi crouched over him, and the frustration was clear in his tone. “I’m a disaster today, I was doing okay… I pet the owls… I…”

Akaashi bit his lip, squeezing the fingers in his palm tightly. “I understand. But everyone has bad days. I don’t blame you for it, Bokuto-san.”

Bokuto looked up at him, eyes glinting with a flash of fear. “Not like me, they don’t.”

And, Akaashi honestly didn’t know how to respond to that.

He wondered if it would be best for both their sakes to end the date there.

But, then, he would have to leave Bokuto like this and Akaashi did not like the thought very much.

After a moment, Akaashi stood up straight, fingers slipping from Bokuto’s grasp. “Well, I think I want to bowl with you, Bokuto-san. If you’d let me.”

“Even if I’m a disaster?”

Akaashi hummed. He needed to redirect this negativity. “No, but especially because you’re knocking things over, Bokuto-san.”

At Bokuto’s confused look, Akaashi turned away, tapping his finger to his chin. “If you knocked over those pins like you knocked over the stand, I think you’d be the best bowler there.”

Bokuto’s eyes widened and he looked down at the floor blankly. “Like the stand.”

“Yes, those stands are huge . There’s at least a hundred pounds of metal and scrap chained to those stands and you knocked it over like it was no big deal. If you were bowling with that energy, no pin would stand in your way.”

That seemed to do the trick and Bokuto was quickly up on his feet, a subdued, but present eagerness on his face. “I’ll beat everyone there and we’ll win all the prizes!”

Akaashi smiled, reaching out a hand. “I’m looking forward to it.”

They left the zoo in a rush, and headed for the train station. Bokuto seemed to be feeling better overall, but his energy was suppressed by something that Akaashi couldn’t quite place. Akaashi didn’t know how to address it so he simply kept his fingers intertwined with Bokuto’s. To ground his soulmate or to ground himself, he wasn’t sure.

When they reached their stop, the both of them nearly leapt out of the car, and Bokuto pulled Akaashi towards their destination.

It felt like they were running from something. Maybe they were running from the negativity left behind at the zoo, or maybe they were running from some inner demons they were facing. Regardless, they were running, and Akaashi felt the cool spring air enter his lungs like a sharp stab in the chest as they went, and they were running, and Akaashi wondered if Bokuto felt the same, and they were running, and running, and running.

They came to a stop in front of a dimly lit bowling alley. The neon sign that flickered beat in time to the thumping of their hearts. Bokuto took a deep breath, looked at Akaashi out of the corner of his eye, and then turned to push open the double doors at the entrance.

It didn’t budge.

Belatedly, they noticed the ‘Closed on Saturdays’ sign on the side.

After initial concern, Akaashi’s brain rifled through several options before settling on one.

“Bokuto-san, we could go to a different bowling alley,” He breathed once he could catch his breath. “There are plenty in Tokyo, there’s bound to be one open today.”

“It’s okay, ‘Kaashi,” Bokuto said, but it sounded hollow and distinctly not okay. He pulled up his phone, turning it on to check the time. “I should take you home.”

Akaashi checked his own phone to see 18:26 blinking up at him. It wasn’t even that late. “Bokuto-san, please give me a moment to look for other bowling—”

“I really wanted to show you this one but, maybe next…” Bokuto cut off, looking uncertain and torn with indecision.

“Maybe next time,” Akaashi completed the sentence, but somehow, the words left a bitter aftertaste in his mouth.

“Yeah.”

The two headed back in silence, and Bokuto left him at his door quietly. Their fingers lingered for a moment as if straining to stay together, but eventually those parted too.

“I’m sorry I ruined our date, Akaashi,” Bokuto whispered, before turning in for the night. He gave Akaashi a small smile, but the first-year didn’t like how it fit on his despondent face.

It was only after he had left that Akaashi realized he hadn’t told him that he didn’t ruin anything.

Sunday came and with it, their plans for another date they had prepared on Friday.

Except, Bokuto didn’t contact him, and Akaashi spent the whole day wondering where he went wrong.

Chapter Text

It wasn’t like Akaashi spent the entirety of Sunday waiting for Bokuto, but he definitely spent the entirety of Sunday waiting for Bokuto.

Anytime his phone buzzed or beeped, the first-year had to hold back lunging for it in his haste. Bokuto might have had other obligations he needed to take care of today so if he wasn’t speaking to Akaashi, that wasn’t anything special. But, Bokuto might also need him—to amend whatever went wrong on their Saturday date.

Before this whole soulmate thing, Akaashi never thought any one person could ever need another, but he felt like it was okay to want someone there. He wanted to be there for Bokuto.

If Bokuto wanted him .

Yet, Sunday passed without a single text or call from Bokuto and Akaashi went to bed late, sleeping fitfully until morning. When he had to get up for school, he swallowed the hard pill that had been stressing him out for the past twenty-four hours.

Bokuto didn’t want him .

Clearly, there was something Akaashi could have done differently that day. And, even if Bokuto wasn’t feeling well enough for their second date, he could have messaged Akaashi if he truly cared about the first-year. It’s true that the second-year was clearly distraught after the events following the owl holding, but Akaashi couldn’t think of a single way his powers could have contributed in worsening his soulmate’s mood.

After all, it was going really well—it was one of the best outings he’d ever had.

So, clearly, it was Akaashi’s fault.

Somehow.

Akaashi sighed, groaning into his hands as he sat down for homeroom. He’d find Bokuto during break or lunch and apologize then. He’d also point out that he had a great time if that was needed as well. Honestly, he wasn’t sure what was needed in this kind of situation—he’s never been much of the socializing type, and dating was something else entirely.

He blinked, brows furrowing. Wait, were they even dating?

That was the thing with soulmates wasn’t it—tied to each other by fate didn’t necessarily mean they were dating. Even if Kuroo had mentioned the ‘b’ word during their outing and Bokuto had let him say it without correcting him, Akaashi thought that maybe it had been a spur of the moment kind of thing. The first-year even said it himself to Bokuto—soulmates often didn’t even make it through the week and even if they did, the trauma was too much—

Was there something traumatizing about their date the other day?

Akaashi rifled through all the choices he made Saturday—maybe his compliment regarding Bokuto’s attire hadn’t felt genuine enough or maybe he bought too much ice cream that Bokuto was disgusted with him. Maybe Bokuto noticed that Akaashi had stared too hard, had wanted too much, had probably fallen in love with the upperclassman too hard, too fast. Maybe he should’ve been nicer to Kuroo.

“Akaashi-kun?”

Startled, Akaashi looked up, locking eyes with the teacher. It wasn’t just her—his classmates were also staring at him with concern. He belatedly realized that he’d been so lost in his thoughts that he neglected to speak up during attendance.

“Present. I apologize,” Akaashi said, shame prickling down his spine. He took out his writing utensils from his bag, fumbling with them for a moment before setting them on his desk. His teacher paused.

“Akaashi-kun, is something the matter?”

“Nothing,” Akaashi responded before picking up on some whispering from his classmates.

“It must be his soulmate, he’s probably exhausted.”

“Oh, poor Akaashi-kun! It’s a shame his soulmate is that loud, weird Bokuto, it must be hard.”

“ I know! I wish he were soulmates with me—he needs someone as put together as him. ”

Akaashi didn’t realize he was standing before it had already happened. He turned to the gossipers.

“Bokuto-san is an incredible person. He is bright and outgoing and his energy is infectious. I am honored to have him as my soulmate and I couldn’t imagine having anyone other than him.”

The classroom was engulfed in silence, and even the teacher looked shocked. The only sound that remained was the thudding of Akaashi’s heart.

Oh.

“Excuse me,” Akaashi managed before he went out of the door and briskly made his way to the bathroom. Nobody seemed to question his decision or even call out to him.

Once there, he threw open the stall door, sat down on the toilet, put his head in his hands, and groaned. Loud.

He couldn’t believe he said that. He couldn’t believe he acted like that. Where was the Akaashi Keiji everyone knew? The one he himself thought he knew as well? He was supposed to be composed, well put together. Someone who didn’t speak out in class unaddressed or butt into other people’s conversations.

Well, that Akaashi Keiji was dead and it was because Bokuto had killed him.

With love.

God, he was in love.

Akaashi sighed, prying his hands away from his face. It felt like something was stuck in his throat, restricting his breathing. He stared down at his fingers—the ones that Bokuto had called pretty—and knew why he was acting this way.

What good did it do if he loved someone who didn’t love him back?

He rubbed at his eyes furiously, trying to stop the waterworks before they even started. He tried to take deep breaths through his nose, in and out, in and out. He was almost feeling better when someone pushed open the door to the bathroom with a loud creak.

Akaashi froze, listening. It was probably just someone from his class that his teacher sent to take care of him. Either that or someone who went to the same school that he didn’t know at all.

“Akaashi?”

The first-year blinked, trying to put a name to the voice. “K-Konoha-san?”

“Oh, you’re here after all—” the door swung closed and Akaashi heard Konoha walk over to the wall near the sinks. “You okay?”

Konoha was only someone he’d recently gotten acquainted with on Friday through volleyball practice. Akaashi didn’t know him too well other than the fact he was a second-year like Bokuto and he seemed like a reasonable, mild-mannered person.

It was kind of embarrassing meeting him again like this.

“I’m alright, I’m sorry about the trouble,” Akaashi said quietly. At least his voice didn’t sound as shaky as he felt. “Did my teacher send for you?”

“Nah, there was a really concerned first-year who burst into our class without warning, looking for a ‘Bokuto’ to help his soulmate. I came in his place.”

Dread swirled in Akaashi’s stomach. Bokuto didn’t even want to see him. Akaashi felt his eyes prickle once more, and he bit his lip to ground himself. “Thank you for coming, but I’m alright.”

There was silence and the first-year was certain that Konoha was picking apart the validity of Akaashi’s words. Generally, when students—studious students—left the classroom without much of a warning, they were certainly not ‘alright.’ Akaashi was sure he looked the type.

Because he was.

“It’s none of my business but,” Konoha started, shaking Akaashi out of his thoughts. “Did you get into a fight with Bokuto?”

Akaashi swallowed, the million things he was sure he did wrong on that date taking forefront in his head once more. “I… may have done things I regret on our date.”

Konoha hummed contemplatively. What he said next threw Akaashi off guard. “He has these moods .”

“Moods?”

“Yeah, he gets really depressed sometimes and it’s hard for him to pick himself back up from it,” Konoha continued. “It’s kind of hard to know when they’ll hit cause for most things, he’s fine, yaknow?”

The bell rang, signaling the end of homeroom and Akaashi flinched at the sound.

“Oh crap, I have to go spend break with Komi, but talk to him, okay? I’m sure you guys’ll figure it out—Bokuto is at the nurse’s right now, but he should be there at practice after school.”

The nurse’s?

“Wait, Konoha-san,” Akaashi started, but the bathroom door creaked open once more and he was gone.

Akaashi took a deep breath to steady himself, then exited the stall. He walked to the sink and splashed some water over his face.

Well, he missed homeroom, but that was the least of his concerns. For some reason Bokuto was at the nurse’s office. Maybe that was the reason why he couldn’t be contacted on Sunday. It might have had nothing to do with Akaashi at all, just a passing sickness.

He wondered if Bokuto was okay. He wondered if it would be alright to go see him in the nurse’s office.

Akaashi didn’t think long about it because as soon as he left the bathroom, he was already headed there.

It occurred to him that he might seem clingy, trailing after his upperclassman like this, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. He wanted to know once and for all if Bokuto was truly avoiding him because he disliked the first-year or if it was really just a stupid cold.

He also wanted something to help address the feeling that propelled his legs to go to the nurse’s office uninvited.

But, Bokuto wasn’t there when he arrived and before Akaashi could turn around to start searching for him again, his homeroom teacher caught him.

“Akaashi, are you alright? Did you need the nurse’s?”

“No, I’m fine, I’m sorry about causing a scene in your class.”

“I understand how soulmates can be,” she said with an understanding smile. “Though, I will need you to make up the class you missed during lunch so please come by the teacher’s lounge then.”

The bell rang again, signaling the end of break. Akaashi nodded, and his teacher walked away. He sighed, pulling at his fingers.

He wanted to spend lunchtime looking for Bokuto too, but he supposed this couldn’t have been avoided with the fact he literally bolted out of his class. He’d essentially ditched though he wasn’t sure it counted as such when his teacher clearly saw him go.

Ignoring the anxiousness, he felt, Akaashi dropped by homeroom to pick up his things before going to his next class. He tried his best to focus on his studies for the rest of the day. He wouldn’t let his mind wander to Bokuto if he couldn’t help it because as important as this whole soulmate thing was—or, has become—for him, if Bokuto was only sick with a flu then his over-worrying would be foolish.

Yet, even as Akaashi tried, he couldn’t stop.

There’s a word that perfectly describes someone who was acting like he was. It was like he was in a daze, some kind of distracted—never really tuning into anything in particular, always drifting off to think about Bokuto—was he okay? Where was he now? Did he need anything? Did he want anything?

Yes, he was lovesick.

And it was pretty unbecoming.

All this worrying wouldn’t do him any good if Bokuto didn’t want to see Akaashi again. Yet, Akaashi sat there, class after class, thinking about Bokuto. Those wide smiles, that laughter that resonated through every bone in Akaashi’s body, the way his palm felt against the rough calluses of Bokuto’s. He thought of the sparkle in the second-year’s eyes, the way he dressed up for their date, the way he numbered silly little things in a list like they were constellations he wanted to map together in the sky.

Akaashi wanted to be a part of that universe.

In all honesty, waiting now was agonizingly worse than Sunday because Bokuto was at home then and Akaashi was at his own. Akaashi didn’t know where Bokuto lived so he couldn’t have gone to see him even if he wanted to do so. He had an excuse to do other things.

Now, they were only a school’s length away.

A few more classes concluded and then lunch passed excruciatingly in the teacher’s lounge before Akaashi was back in class again, failing to focus for the umpteenth time that day. When the final bell rang, Akaashi was up and out of the room, his belongings haphazardly shoved into his bag.

Also unlike him.

It didn’t matter as long as he got to speak with Bokuto.

He got to the locker room, contemplating waiting outside to meet with Bokuto, but then thought better of it because it might look a bit strange for him to loiter outside with no clear purpose.

Instead, he went inside, quickly dressed, and then followed some of his teammates into the gymnasium. There, as everyone was stretching, Akaashi kept his eyes glued to the door.

“Uh, you okay there, man?” another first-year asked him, nervously.

Akaashi turned to him, confused.

“You just look really intense, that’s all,” the guy chuckled, and if his decision to travel to the other end of the gym afterwards to continue his stretches was a result of that statement, Akaashi didn’t say anything.

“Alright, we’re starting!” a third year called.

Akaashi scanned the room, frowning. Surely, he had been keeping an eye on everyone who had been coming and going. But maybe he’d missed Bokuto somehow.

It didn’t seem likely upon doing one full scan of the room. He turned back towards the door, concerns rising. Akaashi looked for the second-years again and approached Konoha as the third-year was giving instructions in the background.

“Konoha-san, are—is Bokuto-san alright?” Akaashi started, then added. “You mentioned he was at the nurse’s earlier.”

“Oh, huh,” Konoha responded, looking around for a man Akaashi was sure he wouldn’t find. “He’s probably running late, don’t worry about it.”

Except Akaashi did worry about it.

He worried about it all throughout the drills, from every setup to every spike, to every call for ‘one more’ and every yell of ‘nice receive.’ It put him off his game. A lot.

The coach pulled him out more than once, mentioning that if it was a soulmate issue, he could have gotten a note that exempted him from practice, but if it wasn’t, he was at risk of being kicked off the team.

Akaashi barely heard it. His head was still only locked on Bokuto.

It was like a curse at this point. Akaashi was indifferent to soulmates in general, but for the first time he thought about how this can honestly single-handedly ruin his life.

All because he cared too much about a guy who wouldn’t even meet him face-to-face.

But, Bokuto wasn’t like that. He wasn’t someone who flaked on others or broke promises—at least the ones that mattered—on purpose. It must have been some other reason, some other circumstance that made him so distant. He thought about what Konoha said about moods and about the way Bokuto had been so disappointed at the bowling alley.

Everyone has bad days, Akaashi had said. Not like me, Bokuto had responded.

Practice was wrapping up with some last skirmishes involving blocking. Just as Akaashi started to contemplate finding out Bokuto’s address with possible illegal means—the man himself showed up at the doorway, panting, out of breath.

“Bokuto!” the coach called, and although he seemed a little frustrated that the captain himself had showed up late, he seemed resigned as if this had happened in the past. “You’re late! You’ve rarely been late since we appointed you to captain.”

“Ah, sorry, sorry,” Bokuto stammered, and his voice was like ambrosia to Akaashi’s ears. He put down his bag at the end of the gymnasium. “I wasn’t—”

The coach cut him off, ordering him to stretch so that he could do a few remaining drills before they ended for the day. He complied quietly, slipping on his kneepads on the bench and then joining the others for practice.

Bokuto didn’t spare Akaashi a second glance the entire time.

Akaashi felt a low simmer of guilt and frustration boil at the bottom of his stomach as he set a few more volleyballs for his team. Bokuto was right there, right next to him and still he wasn’t acknowledging him. And, in all honesty, he seemed perfectly fine—no flu or cold symptoms in sight.

Clearly, Akaashi had done something wrong. But, how could he have known when Bokuto hadn’t communicated to him at all. After practice, they’d talk and resolve this—and end it too, if necessary.

It hurt to think about so Akaashi just tried to focus on important things, like the feel of the ball in his hand, the squeak of his shoes on the floor. Still, he found his gaze drifting over to Bokuto, the way he moved, the way he breathed, the way he was.

When practice ended and everyone started packing up to leave, Akaashi caught Bokuto before he could make a run for it.

“Bokuto-san, we need to talk, is that alright?”

The second-year flinched, wrapping a towel over his shoulders and looking directly at his locker. “O-okay.”

“We can stay for extra practice if you’d like.”

Bokuto nodded, a nervous smile flitting across his face for a moment before disappearing.

Akaashi bit his lip, but refrained from saying anything else. He knew any kind of anxiety he felt might show up negatively through Bokuto so he wanted to stay as calm and rational as possible.

After everyone left and Bokuto retrieved the key from the coach, the two stepped into the room, leaving the gymnasium doors ajar just a sliver.

“‘Kaashi,” Bokuto started but stopped abruptly as a ball soared into his chest. He blinked in confusion, looking up at Akaashi.

“We can practice first,” Akaashi said, pulling out the volleyball cart and net from the storage room.

“…okay,” Bokuto lips upturned genuinely for the first time since their reunion.

Akaashi wanted desperately to preserve that happiness on his face for as long as possible. He thought that making Bokuto practice a little might help get rid of any nervousness he had. Then, the hardest part would come easier.

Hopefully.

The two set a steady rhythm—Bokuto tossed the ball, Akaashi set it, and Bokuto spiked it over the net. It was exhausting and quite grueling, but it felt good to lose themselves in the game.

It was easy not to think needlessly about Bokuto with Bokuto right in front of him. Clearly, he was doing just fine, at least physically. Maybe Bokuto got more easily discouraged than most people did, but that didn’t make him a liability or hindrance.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi breathed out as they neared their second hour. He swallowed, eyeing his water bottle on the bench. “It’s okay if you don’t like me.”

Bokuto stilled, turning to the first-year with a look of pure puzzlement. Akaashi tried to catch his breath, tried to explain.

“You—” he thought carefully as not to blame Bokuto for anything. “I haven’t seen you all day and I just want you to know that if you don’t want me around, please let me know so that I only,” Akaashi felt something twist in his gut. The dryness in his mouth didn’t help. “Let me know so that I only speak with you during practice. I apologize for anything I may have done wrong on our date.”

“Akaashi, what…”

“I had a great time. That’s all I wanted to say,” Akaashi laughed lightly, his head dizzy from the strenuous exercising. He was sure that his exhaustion made it easier to be honest, to say things without thinking. That was fine. No reservations.

But when Bokuto fell over right in front of him, Akaashi’s attention snapped to focus instantly.

“Bokuto-san?!”

He rushed over to the second-year’s crumpled form on the floor. Bokuto was clutching his own arms tightly, curling into himself in a fetal position. He was breathing heavily, eyes squeezed shut, sweating—though, Akaashi wasn’t sure if that was because of their practice.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi repeated, unsure what to do, where to touch, how to help. “What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

Maybe he had been feverish this entire time and Akaashi hadn’t noticed because he’d been so focused on his own feelings. Maybe Bokuto needed Akaashi from the start, but Akaashi had been overthinking everything and now, it was too late.

Bokuto shook his head roughly muttering a ‘feels bad’ and Akaashi looked around frantically for their phones. He’d left his in his bag, but Bokuto’s was out in the open. He lunged for it, swiping at the screen.

The phone seemed to understand his urgency because it let him in easily. In the back of Akaashi’s head, he wanted to chastise the upperclassman for not setting a lock, but he pushed the thought away because it had saved Akaashi time trying to figure out the password.

With shaky fingers, Akaashi pulled up the call function and dialed emergency services.

“Hello?”

“H-hello, I’m—my soulmate is in pain, I don’t know what’s wrong—he’s breathing heavily and he fell over—”

“So, this is a soulmate-related emergency?”

Akaashi paused, uncertain. It seemed like the only explanation at this point. “Yes, I think so, but I’m not sure—”

There was some slow typing on the other side and Akaashi fought back the desire to yell at the operator to go faster. He wrung his free hand frantically instead as Bokuto’s breathing grew more labored.

“What category are your powers in?”

“Cognitive—”

A static noise sounded from the other line. The operator made some grumbling noises before addressing Akaashi once more.

“Any sub-sections?”

“Empath—”

The line went silent again as the operator input more information into his system. Akaashi wanted to scream. This was taking too long. He glanced over at Bokuto nervously and his breath caught in his lungs.

Bokuto was bleeding. He was tearing at his collarbone, his shoulders, his neck with the force of his nails, clutching onto his own body like a lifeline. The skin was already bruising, slowly, the punctured skin wilting under his touch.

“Scared…” Bokuto was speaking with a muted, dying voice that didn’t suit him. “‘Kaashi…”

The twenty percent fatality rate flashed through his head like an alarm, loud, pressing, reminding Akaashi of how helpless he was to stop this—to stop his own powers from killing his soulmate. With the wide range of powers that were being discovered day by day, emergency services were nearly useless for soulmate-related incidents. It was difficult to moderate a recent world filled with superpowered people, and even with some organization, there were categories, subcategories, and little person-specific variations that made most of the services null and void. Maybe one day in the future they’d have a more efficient and helpful system that would bring down that mortality rate.

But today was not that day.

“Just a moment, it’ll only take a minute—let me reconnect you to the specialist in that area. Please be sure to give them a breakdown of your abilities when you reach them.”

And, without another word, elevator music started playing from the call.

Akaashi abandoned the phone, dropping it onto the floor as he desperately wrapped his fingers over Bokuto’s stiff ones.

“Bokuto-san, Bokuto-san, please—" he begged, trying to pry Bokuto away from himself, trying to coax him out of the panic. He wasn’t helping, he knew—he was more than a little freaked out himself, but maybe if he could get Bokuto away from injuring himself, that would be a good start.

“Too much,” Bokuto choked through gritted teeth, tears streaming down his eyes. Akaashi wanted to cry too—he knew it was probably best if he left Bokuto here by himself so that no other people could influence his feelings, but he didn’t want to leave Bokuto like this—was it better to leave him so he could suffer on his own or was it better to stay and have him suffer still? He wasn’t helping either way. He wasn’t any help.

“The—” Bokuto panted, clenched his teeth, exhaled shakily. “…alley—”

“What?”

“S’ry, ‘Kaash…” a sob tore its way through Bokuto’s body. “I ruin… couldn’t…”

“It’s okay, Bokuto-san. Everything will be okay,” Akaashi said, though he wasn’t sure if he himself believed it. “Please, can you breathe? One deep breath, that’s all I ask— I’ll do it with you, here—in… out… in…”

There was a sharp intake of breath from Bokuto, and he exhaled it slowly. Akaashi followed, breathing regularly, hoping he could calm both him and Bokuto enough so that he could take the second-year to the hospital.

Then, he realized that was a terrible idea because he personally hated hospitals.

Upon that realization, Akaashi’s panic returned only momentarily, but it was just enough—Bokuto’s breath hitched in his throat and suddenly he was hyperventilating, clutching even harder at himself. Akaashi felt dread and horror settle into his stomach as more blood stained Bokuto’s fingers, the fingers that he once held in his own.

He was powerless to stop this. Everyone felt emotions, and so did he, but for so long, he’d never been allowed to feel anything just for himself. It made it harder to manage his own emotions despite his expertise in managing the emotions of others.

And now, the one time he felt something on his own, it was hurting his soulmate.

Akaashi located the phone on the floor, held it to his ear. The elevator music was still playing, a cheery tune in the midst of the chaos.

He hung up, shaking visibly. He realized he was crying too, he was crying and shaking and absolutely terrified. He didn’t want to lose Bokuto. He had only met him, he had only gotten to know him, but he knew that he truly, completely loved him with all his being, with every fiber of his soul—so something had to be done or Bokuto was going to claw his own throat out—he was clearly drowning under the weight of not only Akaashi’s emotions, but from his own inner demons as well.

With one last resort in mind, Akaashi located the contact list on Bokuto’s phone, flipping rapidly through the contacts.

Once located, he called the number, listening to it ring a few times before pulling it away from his ear to verify that he was trying to reach the right person.

‘Bestest Bro’ flashed up at him from the screen.

Chapter Text

“On my way,” the serious voice from the other line said, and Akaashi heard keys jingle and a door slam.

Akaashi was relieved he didn’t have to explain much—Kuroo seemed to understand the situation immediately. The first-year looked back down at Bokuto who was still clutching at his throat desperately, breathing labored, blood red, red, red on his hands. “K-Kuroo-san, what do I do, he’s hurting himself—”

“Have you tried taking his powers?” Kuroo huffed, clearly running.

Akaashi blinked, the answer obvious and clear now that he had a second opinion on the situation. He turned to Bokuto, still clutching the phone in his hands and came to a sudden realization. Akaashi turned back to the call, tried to keep his panic at bay.

“I never asked him how he did it,” Akaashi uttered, dread sinking into his head. He wanted to try Bokuto’s powers sometime, but he never asked the second-year how.

How could he have not done that?

Clearly because Akaashi was too busy enjoying the emotional freedom the week had granted him. And now, his selfishness would be his downfall.

“I don’t know how. I don’t want to make it worse.”

Bokuto whimpered loudly and Akaashi felt a pang of guilt and regret all at once. He didn’t want this. He never wanted this. His powers were never meant to hurt anyone, least of all his soulmate.

“Grab his thumbs,” Kuroo’s voice came to ground him. “Whatever he’s doing, it sounds like a panic attack, you need to take his thumbs, and pull them towards his fingers and back so that the rest of the hand follows. Do not let go after.”

Akaashi quickly moved to follow his instructions, hands shaking, but determined—now that he had some kind of solution, he could help, he could save Bokuto before the twenty percent, the twenty percent, the twenty percent fatality rate.

His heart continued to thud in his chest, the soulmate-related mortality rate blaring in his head the entire time as he found Bokuto’s thumbs. He grabbed them firmly in his hands, then pulled as informed, and stiffly, painstakingly, Bokuto’s fingers started untangling around his neck.

They were still bloody and the skin was raw, but nails weren’t making contact with flesh anymore so that was a good start.

“He’s still shaking and breathing really hard and, it’s,” Akaashi strained to keep the phone under his ear with both hands occupied. “It’s hard to keep him from—”

“Hang on, I’m nearly there—” Kuroo breathed before the line went dead.

Akaashi let the phone clatter to the floor, turning his full attention to Bokuto. “Bokuto-san? Bokuto-san, please hang in there, Kuroo is coming. He’ll be here, he’ll—”

Akaashi thought back to how much Bokuto had needed Kuroo back on their date. He thought about how he’d probably never be able to provide that support for his own soulmate. He thought about how sad that was—that he couldn’t measure up to Kuroo in that way.

Then, he stopped because Bokuto started tugging more desperately on his hands, trying to bring them back to his shoulders.

Akaashi swallowed, took a breath to steady himself and put his feelings aside. He tightened his hold on Bokuto’s fingers, refusing to let go despite his obviously weaker physical strength compared to his upperclassman. His hands shook with the exertion. “Kuroo will be here and he’ll be able to help. I promise.”

They stayed there on the gymnasium floor together, the minutes dragging on like hours, every second a year shaved off Akaashi’s life.

Finally, finally, Akaashi heard hurried footsteps draw closer and closer until Kuroo pushed open the doors with a bang. His hair was disheveled even more than it was before and although he was sweating, his eyes were sharp and alert, locking immediately onto the two of them.

“Kuroo-san,” Akaashi exhaled, relief flooding over him like a tidal wave. The second-year had arrived faster than any ambulance could have. As Akaashi’s eyes prickled, he thought he’d never call Kuroo a pain-in-the-ass ever again. “You’re here.”

“Yeah, sorry I’m late,” Kuroo hurriedly panted, out of breath. He ran over to them, kneeling in front of Bokuto, wincing at the damage. “That looks pretty bad.”

Akaashi’s vision swam with tears. He nodded, fighting the lump in his throat.

Kuroo reached for Bokuto’s hands and although Akaashi hesitated momentarily, he eventually released them. Kuroo held on to them tightly in his stead and Akaashi slumped to the floor, ignoring the aching in his knees and numbness in his arms.

“Bokuto, can you hear me? I know it hurts, but you need to tell Akaashi how to use your powers so we can help you.”

“K—” Bokuto choked, squinting up at the second-year. “—roo..”

“Yeah, I’m here,” Kuroo assured, keeping his grip firm. He emphasized his request—no, demand. “You need to tell Akaashi how to use your powers.”

Bokuto shook his head stiffly. “—urts.”

Kuroo bit his lip. “Is it hard to talk?”

Akaashi watched Bokuto shakily open his mouth before it clamped shut. There was the sound of teeth grinding together roughly. Bokuto whimpered again, nodding in affirmation.

“So, first, in order to use your powers, you…?” Kuroo started encouragingly, and Akaashi didn’t know why he was still trying to get Bokuto to talk because it was clear that Bokuto could barely get a sentence out, let alone a word.

There was silence as Bokuto’s breathing became more level, though still worryingly ragged. Kuroo seemed to be in deep concentration and although Akaashi wanted to help, he wasn’t sure if interrupting whatever the second-year was doing would be the right decision.

“Okay,” Kuroo nodded after what seemed like an eternity, turning to Akaashi. “You need to ask for permission.”

Akaashi blinked. “What?”

“If you ask for permission and he grants it, you’ll be able to use his powers for four minutes.”

“How did you—” Akaashi stammered, but then shoved his curiosity to the back of his head. This wasn’t the time. There was a solution and he needed to use it now to help Bokuto. “Alright.”

He turned to Bokuto, trying to keep his heart and hands steady. Kuroo backed off as he approached. “Bokuto-san, could I take your powers?”

Bokuto nodded desperately, and Akaashi waited for the wave of emotions to hit him like a truck.

It did.

Hard.

Akaashi nearly choked, winded by the sheer force of it, as it surged into all his limbs like a tidal wave of despair. The emotions the transfer carried were like a rush of a storm, instantly filling his nostrils, suffocating him from within—a grip coiling to strangle his lungs as he desperately tried to breathe.

He felt guilty and sad. He felt overwhelmed and empty. He felt everything and nothing all at once.

Akaashi realized now why Bokuto was clawing as his throat desperately—it felt like there was something there constricting his airways, keeping him from breathing regularly, from stepping back and realizing there wasn’t a threat—at least not physically.

Were his powers always this strong?

It hurt.

But, Akaashi thought about how much this had hurt Bokuto and suddenly, it hurt him a little less to know he was the one feeling it instead.

Distantly, he heard someone calling his name.

And, just like that, most of the pain left him.

It sat like a dull ache as Akaashi opened his eyes—he hadn’t even realized they’d closed—and looked into bright, golden spheres, shimmering with the onset of tears.

“Akaashi, oh my god, are you—are you okay?”

 Akaashi took in the raw marks around Bokuto’s neck, the scratches that trailed down his shoulders, and the redness of his fingers. Yet, even with all these injuries, there the second-year sat, holding Akaashi as if he were the one about to break.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi finally choked, warm tears streaming down his cheeks. “Don’t be ridiculous. Please worry about yourself first…”

“Ah,” Bokuto startled, looking panicked. Akaashi barely felt it under all the relief. “I’m sorry, sorry, oh no, does it hurt?”

Akaashi felt his lip tremble as he reached out, gently cupping Bokuto’s face in his hands. “No,” he breathed, exhale shaky. “It doesn’t.”

Then, he kissed him.

Bokuto’s breath caught in his throat as Akaashi leaned in, drowning himself in everything that was Bokuto Koutarou. He breathed in the sweat, the hair gel, and the faint hint of rust from the blood. He breathed in the panic, the uncertainty, the anxiety, and pain. At the same time, he breathed in relief and joy.

He breathed in the man who had taken his breath from him time and time again since the day he’d met him.

And Bokuto reciprocated.

They fit together perfectly like two pieces of a puzzle.

Akaashi wasn’t sure if he was doing it right—after all, he’d never kissed anyone before his soulmate and there wasn’t really a guidebook on how one goes about kissing—but, when he breathlessly pulled back to meet hazy, golden eyes looking at him in awe, he knew he’d done something right.

“Akaashi,” Bokuto whispered in disbelief, as if speaking any louder would break the moment. “Do you like me?”

Akaashi felt like crying all over again. To think that Bokuto finally figured it out, but without the use of his empathetic powers. Unbelievable.

How fitting of him.

“Bokuto-san, I love you.”

The first-year watched as Bokuto stilled, then gave the widest and shakiest smile he’d ever seen in his life.

“Akaashi loves me!” Bokuto exclaimed, eyes alighting like fireworks. “You love me!”

“Yes,” Akaashi laughed wetly, sitting back on his knees. “…Is that okay?”

“Yeah, because I love you too!” Bokuto shouted, wrapping his arms around Akaashi tightly. “I love you so much and I was afraid that if you saw me mess up, you wouldn’t love me anymore, and that made me so sad and I felt really bad about our date cause I did so many things wrong and it kept getting worse and then I got into one of my slumps and that made it even more terrible and everything was bad and it made me feel bad that you were my soulmate because you have to deal with everything that—”

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi managed around the embrace. “We’re soulmates.”

Bokuto pulled back, blinking at Akaashi.

“What I mean is,” Akaashi continued, clearing his throat. “Past the title of it, past the societal expectation that we’re supposed to be together, I care about you a lot. You amaze me, Bokuto-san. And, even if you have bad days—” Bokuto flinched, looking abashed, but Akaashi wouldn’t let him dwell on it. “—that are worse than most people’s, that doesn’t change the fact that I admire you. That… that I love you. I love that we’re soulmates.”

Bokuto looked entranced. He tentatively reached for Akaashi’s cheek slowly as if he would harm the first-year as he had harmed himself. Akaashi took his hand firmly, brought it to rest on his face.

“Can I kiss you?”

Akaashi smiled softly, already leaning closer. “You don’t have to ask.”

They met halfway, and it was softer this time. Akaashi felt the slow drag of Bokuto’s lips on his, the lingering touch of skin against skin, the tender familiarity of Bokuto in each breath that was taken from him.

Taken, and then given back tenfold.

They only parted to breathe in air that wasn’t each other’s, sucking in oxygen greedily. Akaashi wasn’t sure if it was the adrenaline from the near-death experience or the kiss itself that had them both panting.

Probably both.

“Are you kids dressed? Can I come in now?” Kuroo’s voice called, snapping them out of their trance. They looked over to see him standing in the doorway with a smug grin. Akaashi wasn’t even aware of when he had left—probably to give them some privacy.

Bokuto flushed and Akaashi followed suit. The first-year opened his mouth to retort, but Kuroo had already sauntered in again, settling down next to them on the floor.

“Kuroo…”

“I’m only teasing,” Kuroo laughed, patting Bokuto on the back lightly. Akaashi noticed the way he avoided Bokuto’s injuries. “Are you feeling better?”

Bokuto beamed, Kuroo’s attitude forgotten. “I’m feeling great! Guess what, Kuroo! Akaashi loves me!”

Heat rose to Akaashi’s face.

“Duh,” Kuroo snickered, leaning back on his arms to glance at the two of them. “Made me run all the way out here just to tell me that?”

“Ah,” Bokuto curled into himself, ashamed. Akaashi felt it acutely like scratching a raw wound and he wanted to smack Kuroo for it despite the fact he had come to their aid. “No, I… that’s not—”

“No, wait, sorry,” Kuroo stammered, sitting up and scratching the back of his head. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m glad I was able to help. Glad you’re feeling better.”

Bokuto smiled and sat up straighter, humming happily. Akaashi paused, considering.

“Kuroo-san, how did you know what to do?”

“Hm?”

“How did you know how to use Bokuto-san’s powers when he couldn’t speak?” Akaashi elaborated.

Kuroo blinked and looked towards Bokuto before back at Akaashi. “Bo didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“Kuroo’s a mind-reader!” Bokuto chirped, as if it was the most obvious fact in the world. “He’s good at talking with people because he knows what they’re thinking!”

Akaashi thought back to all the times on their date when Kuroo had let off he knew more than he should have. The way he had laughed even though there was nothing to laugh about and the way he knew exactly what to say at the right time with an accuracy that was a bit unsettling.

The way he had made it glaringly obvious he knew what Akaashi thought about Bokuto. And, consequently, how Akaashi felt about him, the mangy cat that he was.

Akaashi cheeks turned crimson and Kuroo immediately doubled over in laughter.

“What happened, what happened?” Bokuto asked, oblivious to the inner turmoil Akaashi was going through.

The first-year retracted his last decision to never call Kuroo a pain in the ass again. The homeless kitty was what he was. Even if he had come to save them.

“Never mind him, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi mumbled, turning to his soulmate. “Four minutes should be up any second now—will you be okay taking my powers back?”

Bokuto stiffened, looking uncertain. “Um, probably. I didn’t tell you this, Akaashi, but I get depressed sometimes and it comes and goes so that’s probably why it was harder for me to deal with all the emotions and why I was so bad at it—”

Akaashi grabbed Bokuto’s hands in his. “Bokuto-san, it doesn’t matter what it is—remember that I think you’re a star no matter what, okay? I just want to know if you’ll be alright.”

Akaashi recalled that Bokuto’s powers were only applicable once a day so if Bokuto had another panic attack, the first-year wouldn’t know how to save him.

He needed to know if Bokuto would be fine.

Bokuto smiled, emboldened. “I’ll be okay if you’re here, Akaashi.”

Akaashi thought about how even if he was here, he couldn’t do anything to save Bokuto until Kuroo had arrived. He thought about how he might not be able to do anything even if he stayed by the second-year’s side for the rest of time.

But when Bokuto pulled him into another hug, all those worries faded away. His concerns seemed smaller and his fears evaporated.

Akaashi took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and put his faith in his soulmate.

It was as quick as switching off a light and instantly, Akaashi could only feel his own emotions on his person. He felt Bokuto’s grip on him tighten for a moment before he let go slowly, their bodies parting ever excruciatingly. Akaashi opened his eyes and watched Bokuto carefully, hardly noticing Kuroo shift next to them.

Bokuto’s eyes fluttered open, and Akaashi thought once more that he could get himself lost in those golden hues. The second-year stared at him for a moment. Then, he smiled and the way the grin coursed through his entire body made Bokuto look even brighter.

“See? I’m okay.”

Akaashi’s eyes welled with tears once more. “Yes, I’m here.”

“You are,” Bokuto beamed and leaned over to kiss Akaashi’s tears away. He pulled back and turned to Kuroo with an equally as shining smile. “And, so is Kuroo!”

“Yo,” Kuroo tilted his head in greeting as if he had only just arrived. Akaashi huffed softly, rolling his eyes.

“Thanks for all the help, bro,” Bokuto laughed, punching the raven in the arm. “Even if you’re all jealous and stuff.”

“Wha—” Kuroo flared up, immediately indignant. “I am not jealous! You guys can smooch all you want, what do I care?”

Akaashi grasped the opportunity in a heartbeat. “If you were jealous, why did you come with us on our date, Kuroo-san?”

“Again, I was not—no, am not—" Kuroo spluttered, clearly red in the face. Akaashi smirked and the raven squinted at him. “Oh, I see, how it is—Bokuto, watch out for your soulmate, he’s a shifty one—”

“I think you take that title, Kuroo-san,” Akaashi interjected much to Kuroo’s dismay. He pouted, then tried to gain Bokuto’s sympathies.

“Bo, your boyfriend is being mean to me…”

“You were being mean to him!”

“What, I would never! I’m always the kindest—” Kuroo scoffed, throwing a hand over his chest as if offended. At their silence, he snickered. “Okay, maybe I had a little fun, but—”

Akaashi thought Kuroo probably had a lot of fun and plenty of free time to come join them on their date until he was interrupted by the raven.

“I actually came along at Bokuto’s request,” Kuroo explained, glancing at Bokuto for approval to tell the story. When the second-year didn’t object, he continued. “He wanted to make sure you were enjoying the date. He knew how people were feeling relatively, but he didn’t know how to fine-tune those emotions so he was afraid he might mess up. He asked me to tag along as a backup—though, I did have to leave early.”

Akaashi had more questions, but Kuroo seemed to have those covered as well.

“Bokuto doesn’t have the best emotional competence,” Kuroo shrugged, scratching his head. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, he’s great at riling people up both on the court and off, but I think he’s been trying to keep too much to himself and it overflowed.”

“Sorry Akaashi,” Bokuto spoke, slightly subdued. “When Kuroo left, I was scared I would mess up and then I started to actually mess up and I could tell you were trying really hard to keep it together for both of us so I felt bad and that made it worse and then, then, the bowling alley was closed so I felt even more terrible and even though you were helping me, I could tell that you were sad so I felt really bad.”

Akaashi finally understood. He reached over and placed his hands in Bokuto’s. “Don’t be sorry, Bokuto-san. I wasn’t sad because the bowling alley was closed.”

Bokuto perked up, looking him in the eye. “Really?”

“Really. I was sad because you weren’t feeling well.”

“But,” Bokuto scrunched up his eyebrows and Akaashi thought it was the cutest thing in the world. “I’m the one with your powers. You shouldn’t feel that.”

Akaashi laughed softly, shaking his head in fond exasperation. “I don’t need my powers to care about you, Bokuto-san.”

“Akaashi,” Bokuto breathed and the first-year held on to every syllable that came out of his soulmate’s mouth.

If Kuroo continued to stay jealous, Akaashi didn’t feel it. The only thing he felt were Bokuto’s lips on his again, slotting into place as if they had traveled a long way to come home.

“Morning, ‘Kaashi!”

Akaashi blinked blearily at the shining visage that was his boyfriend, standing outside his door, on a bright Wednesday morning. He smiled softly.

“Good morning, Bokuto-san.”

Bokuto grinned, lifting up a few grocery bags weighted on his arms. “Breakfast before school?”

“I’d love that, thank you,” Akaashi said, stepping aside to let his soulmate into the house. He noticed the rice ball packaging in the bags. “I thought we were going to refrain from depleting your wallet.”

“One last time doesn’t hurt!” Bokuto beamed, setting his goodies down on the island once more. “To celebrate our recovery!”

“Then, shouldn’t I be paying?”

Bokuto was obviously referring to the day off from school he took on Tuesday after the disaster that had happened on Monday night. During this time, he’d discovered he could pass off some of the emotional load on other people if he made direct contact with them. He had texted Akaashi his discovery after he had brushed past his mother and she had suddenly become extremely tired. However, it only seemed to work whenever the user was feeling overwhelmed.

After that night, Akaashi didn’t blame Bokuto for his exhaustion. Around his neck were bruises from Monday, though many were faded purple and green. Akaashi still found it hard to look at them so instead he focused on his boyfriend’s eyes which were a shining, bright gold.

Much nicer.

Bokuto blinked, then laughed. “I guess, but I already got these so we’ll have to wait ‘til next time!”

“Yes, next time,” Akaashi’s chest warmed at the thought. “Let’s get yakiniku, your favorite.”

“Really?! You’re the best, Akaashi!”

As they settled around the table and took out the different types of rice balls, Akaashi reveled in Bokuto’s humming. Bokuto was happily shooting Akaashi occasional glances and smiles and it made the first-year’s heart soar.

If this was what he had to look forward to for the rest of his life, he was ready for it.

“So, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi spoke around his final bite of rice. Bokuto looked up at him owlishly with puffed cheeks.

“Hm?”

Akaashi bit back a laugh. He cleared his throat as Bokuto swallowed and smiled knowingly at him.

“I tried out your powers a few more times, mostly on family and some classmates,” Akaashi continued after composing himself. “I realized I could still take powers from people even if they declined, but the time frame to keep their power is reduced by half. I don’t think your power is exactly borrowing someone else’s power. Asking someone for permission actually eliminates the nerve endings that align with that power and I think there’s some kind of phenomenon that activates your own—”

At Bokuto’s blank look, Akaashi’s words petered off.

“Is something the matter?”

“No, just, uh,” Bokuto looked down, opened another rice ball to eat. “It’s really cool you know all that and also found that out, Akaashi! But, Kuroo actually told me about the scientific parts of my superpower a while ago. I didn’t really get it much because that stuff doesn’t really matter to me, you know? It makes me happy when someone lets me use their power because it’s something that’s a part of them, so, so like, it’s like they’re sharing something important with me. It makes sense it would work less if they don’t want to share.”

Bokuto grinned, and took a bite of the triangle in his hands. “But even though I think my power is cool, I thought soulmates were really, really amazing! I know you weren’t the most excited about soulmates, but I was super happy to meet you! I can only take powers for a short time, but to have someone else’s powers for seven whole days—that’s awesome!”

Akaashi huffed in exasperation, grabbing another rice ball from the table as well. “You must be glad to be rid of mine though.”

Bokuto blinked. “Why do you say that?”

Akaashi stared back at him, dumfounded. As if the answer couldn’t be more obvious from the bruises scattered across the second-year’s body. “You… my powers almost killed you, Bokuto-san.”

“So? I’m still alive, right?” Bokuto stated matter-of-factly. “And I got to meet you, so everything is great!”

Akaashi felt heat rise to his cheeks. He put his rice ball down and started to pull on his fingers. “I’m happy I got to meet you as well, Bokuto-san. I just feel a bit guilty, I suppose.”

“Sure, it really hurt then, but I like your powers a lot, Akaashi,” Bokuto hummed, reaching over to take Akaashi’s hands in his. “I like knowing how people feel—even complete strangers I’ve never met before! It’s like I know a secret that only I know and it’s super fun! But I think it’s hard to feel everyone’s emotions all the time—like, when I was sad and then other people around me got sad because I was sad, it made me sadder and I didn’t know what to do.”

“It exacerbates the feeling, I’m sure.”

“Yeah, it ex—exac—exactly that!” Bokuto grumbled. “I don’t know how you do it, Akaashi. You’re incredible.”

Akaashi tried to ignore the flush that compliment brought to his face. “Well, I believe people feel emotions differently. Some things will hurt more for certain people, but most things I can deal with effectively.”

“Do you… hate your power?”

“What kind of question is that, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi laughed. “How can I hate something that’s a part of me?”

“…I hate something that’s a part of me all the time.”

Akaashi locked eyes with Bokuto and found him biting his lip, twiddling his thumbs around some plastic wrapping that was already free from the triangular casing.

“Bokuto-san.”

“Sorry, that’s not what I—god, I’m feeling better, I swear! It just slipped and I—”

“You’re right. I don’t particularly like my superpower much. I don’t think it defines me and similarly, your bad days don’t define you either.”

“Huh?”

“You have tall black-and-white hair that looks like an owl’s, and you’re our ace as well as our captain. You can probably beat me in an arm-wrestling competition, and your enthusiasm is contagious. You give great hugs, and you’re a bright, strong person.”

“Akaashi?”

Akaashi smiled, meeting Bokuto’s steady gaze. “That’s at least five things you are, Koutarou. Things separate from all the things you hate about yourself.”

Bokuto sat up straighter and his eyes glistened with the onset of tears. He wiped at them frantically, but when he opened his mouth, all that escaped was a low whimper of ‘Keiji.’

Akaashi blushed hard.

“Do you remember the first time you came here with breakfast?” Akaashi murmured under his breath, looking down to avoid eye contact. “You talked about me, what you knew upon only getting to meet me for a short time, and nothing you said was specifically about my superpowers. That… that meant a lot to me. It’s the same—Bokuto-san, you aren’t defined by your bad days.”

Bokuto nodded, sniffling loudly.

“Oh, I almost forgot an important one—you’re also loud in the mornings.”

Bokuto squawked as Akaashi laughed behind his hands.

“Hey, you’re the one who said I was cranky, then.”

“It’s true though,” Bokuto pouted, though the usual light was back in his eyes. “You’re really cranky, Keiji.”

Akaashi knew he couldn’t hide the pink dusting his cheeks anymore after being addressed by his first name again.

“You know what would make me less cranky, Koutarou?”

“Hm?”

“A kiss from my boyfriend.”

Bokuto hummed as if contemplating the answer to a throwaway question. Then, he leaned over, emerald eyes met golden ones for a brief moment before they closed and lips opened instead.

As Akaashi melted in Bokuto’s embrace, he let himself lose himself in the comforting fact that no matter what happened, everything felt right with Bokuto.

They’d gone through a lot and they were sure to encounter much more problems even outside the whole ‘tied by fate’ thing. They still had a full day of the swap left to endure, though it had definitely gotten easier to familiarize themselves with each other’s powers.

Yet, having someone who had literally walked in Akaashi’s shoes and understood him as he was, even past the label of empath, past the label of a person who was simply a good listener—that was something special. Here was the first person he’d met who he wanted to feel with—to know what Bokuto was feeling as his own, past his powers, past the title of a ‘good listener.’ Someone who didn’t particularly need him, but wanted him—so very desperately.

And, unlike his superpower that he didn’t have a choice in, Akaashi did have a choice in who he wanted to be with—whether they were his soulmate or not.

And Bokuto Koutarou was definitely his first, and only choice.

No doubts about it.