Chapter Text
Castiel (two months ago)
Variations On A Theme From Pachelbel's Canon In D- David Lanz
Castiel felt a tingling in his fingertips, a restless muscle memory begging to be made useful again. His breath caught in his throat as two orderlies pulled a dusty sheet off the most beautiful piano he had ever seen. It was a baby grand; several of its ivory keys were chipped and stained, some long ago move had left deep scratches in the wood, and Cas was completely transfixed. He slowly inched towards it, as if it might disappear like a mirage if he got too close. He didn’t notice Nurse Masters slipping in to the day room to lean against the back wall and watch him. All Cas could see was the music he could give life to, and as he ran his hands over the keys he let his eyes shut and head fall back. The look on his face was pure satisfaction, and Nurse Masters thought if that smile had been directed at her, she’d be a puddle on the floor. Without opening his eyes, Cas sat down on the bench and stretched his long fingers over the keys. By some miracle the piano was only slightly out of tune, and Cas thanked the angels on reflex. He ran through the scales, his hands delighted in doing what they were made for. Nurse Masters nearly dropped the folder she was carrying at the sound of laughter emanating from Cas. She stared at him, wondering if he was about to lose his grasp on reality. Instead, he launched into a flowing version of Pachelbel’s Canon, adding his own embellishments and runs, completely lost in the bliss of the music. As others slowly and quietly snuck into the room, drawn in by the sound of hope in the air, they lined the back wall and felt the full force for Cas’ love for music. Garth was crying, Benny and Victor had wide grins, and Kevin and Ash just stood there with their mouths hanging open. Charlie had the biggest smile of them all, and when Cas finally released the last note, she nearly tackled him off the piano bench in a hug.
“What the hell took so long in getting this man a piano!” Ash called out, and the rest of the residents cheered wildly in response.
“I know we’ve all learned Beethoven is in our midst this afternoon, but if y’all don’t settle down we’re taking away dessert tonight!” Missouri told the group, her soft voice cutting though the cheers better than any whistle ever could. Deep groans rose from the residents, but Missouri quieted them with look and turned towards the piano. “Castiel, play me a song?” Cas nodded quickly and sat back down. He paused before putting his fingers on the keys, and then stood back up. He jogged over to Missouri, scribbled something in his notebook and handed it to her. As he walked back to the piano, Missouri announced to the room, “Castiel composed this next piece,” she cleared the emotion from her throat before continuing, “and he says he was inspired by me.” Hoots and hollers followed, but the residents went silent as soon as Cas played the first note. The song he played somehow managed to capture Missouri’s essence perfectly, from her strength to her compassion, even her laugh was transformed into music. There seemed to be a thawing between the others and Castiel, now they understood how Cas communicated. It wasn’t through words, it was through notes. This could easily be understood, and soon Victor had grabbed the drums from the music room and was adding his own beat to Castiel’s new piece. Thirteen seconds later, Ash sprinted back in from the music room with his bass in one hand and an amp in the other. He rushed to plug it in, crank the volume almost all the way up, and then proceeded to play over Victor. Cas continued to play through it all, the smile never leaving his face.
Dean
Is There Somewhere- Halsey
As the darkness swept over him, Dean found himself falling back to the beginning, back to when things with Al had been like a dream.
16 months ago
“AL! Get your ass up here and help me with this dresser!” Dean called down to his boyfriend.
“I would, but your bow-legged ass is blocking the stairs,” Alastair chortled back as he made his way through the kitchen to the bottom of the staircase that led up to their loft. Alastair wolf-whistled as he admired all the curves and sharp edges that made up Dean. Dean, who was still fighting the dresser up the narrow staircase, didn’t appreciate the whistle one bit and flipped a one finger salute back at Al. There was no venom in it, just the bickering of a happy couple. They had just rented the condo a few days prior, although condo was a generous term for the tiny shoebox it actually was. It was in a shitty part of town and was all they could afford, but to Dean it was better than any mansion. For the first time in his life, he had his own place to share with someone he loved and who loved him in return. Al was like a dream come true, and for the two months they had been together Dean had constantly been pinching himself because he could hardly believe a man like him was real, let alone wanted him back. Al had sauntered into the bar Dean worked at, ordered a drink with that raspy voice and a wink, and Dean was fucking gone. At the end of the night Dean, bolstered by the liquid confidence burning through his veins, scribbled his number on the back of Alastair’s bar tab. “Well aren’t you a bold one?” Alastair had drawled when he flipped the receipt over.
“Why don’t you meet me in the bathroom in ten minutes and find out just exactly how bold I can be?” Dean shot back, trying desperately not to think about the long fingers Alastair had wrapped around his glass of bourbon or what they would feel like against Dean skin.
“Patience grasshopper, although it is a rather enticing offer. Maybe next time, when I have fewer… guests,” Alastair replied as his fellow tablemates guffawed. Dean would learn later, to his horror, who those men were but that night they were just meaningless faces. Two long and miserable days later, just as Dean had almost given up hope that he would get a call from the raspy voiced stranger at the bar, his phone chimed with a call from an unknown number. It was Al, and the rest was history.
“I swear to god you filled these drawers with rocks before you had me haul this thing up here,” huffed Dean.
“Lucky for me, you only caught on after you made it to the top,” Alastair said as he wrapped his arms around Dean and slid his hands into the back pockets of the navy blue jeans Dean was wearing. With a roll of his eyes, Dean pushed Al away and strode over to the bed, dresser already forgotten.
“Well, now’s the perfect time to make it up to me and christen our new place. Two birds with one stone, you really can’t get it better than that,” said Dean with a smirk. Even across the room, Dean could see Al’s pupils had blown wide with lust. The way Al looked at him made him hot all over and those stupid butterflies in his stomach were in a whirlwind. He knew what came next, and silently thanked his past self who had thought to put the lube and condoms next to their new bed.
Present Day
These memories of the happy times with Al were the hardest to let go of, and cut deeper than the sickening abuse that followed. How had they gone from carefree and loving each other to Dean in hiding? He didn’t know, only that it was somehow his fault and that he was absolutely terrified of crawling back to Al the second he saw him.