Chapter Text
Seungmin loved being an age regressor. The weight of the world on his shoulders disappeared as he mentally went back to a time when he had nothing to worry about except his own happiness. He could simply be, replacing the thoughts plaguing his mind with blissful innocence.
Usually, he had two ways to approach it. He could distract himself through play until he was prepared to deal with adulthood again, or he could navigate his emotions and find the cause of his distress. The complicated whirlwind in his mind became simplified in his little headspace, allowing him to sort out his thoughts more easily once he knew where his big feelings stemmed from.
When he felt extremely young, his caregiver would do all the thinking for him. He didn't even have to muster up the energy to speak if he didn't want to. He was allowed to fuss about and be doted on, without anything expected in return.
He was content with temporarily forgetting his adult responsibilities, knowing that the brief reprieve from his stressors would allow him to regain his strength and face whatever life had in store for him with renewed confidence and perspective.
However, there were periods when his headspace didn't surface on its own.
Stray Kids were preparing for a music show stage, the last in a long line of shows they had to perform on for comeback promotions. They had some time before their performance, which gave them the freedom to lounge around their backstage waiting room in various states of readiness.
Jeongin was sitting on the sofa, scrolling through his phone after getting his hair and makeup done.
“I.N-ah!”
His body reacted to the approaching movement before he could register what it was, leaning away just in time to evade Changbin’s pinching fingers reaching for his face.
“What is it hyung?” He sighed.
“You look so cute and boyish!”
Changbin managed to poke the peak of his cheekbone, being careful not to smudge any of the sparkly makeup surrounding his eyes.
“If any of the rhinestones fall off the makeup noonas are going to scold you,” Jeongin teased.
“But Innie, I can’t help myself when you look this adorable!” Changbin went to tap his glossy red lips. “Like a soft baby.”
Seeing the maknae pout, he stopped short of making any actual contact. It wasn’t his usual playful grimace of feigned annoyance, Changbin knew, having memorized the nonverbal tells of all the members too well to make the mistake of pushing past their limits. “Not fun anymore?”
A small, hesitant shake of Jeongin’s head confirmed it. “I really don’t want to be babied today.”
Changbin dropped his arm immediately, for which Jeongin was grateful. He simply wasn’t in the mood for his hyungs’ coddling.
“Does that mean you want to be babied on other days?”
Sighing, he rolled his eyes with a small smile. “You’re impossible.”
The rapper smirked. “No, I’m Seo Changbin.”
The joke caused Minho to snort from across the room.
Finding a new target for his antics, Changbin headed towards the dancer.
Moments later, Felix replaced him, settling beside Jeongin. The pair scrolled on their respective phones, Felix leaning more and more on Jeongin’s side until he eventually laid his head on the younger’s shoulder.
“Tired, hyung?”
He received a hum in return. Reaching up to gently scratch Felix’s head, he held him in place, giving him the silent green light to rest there. His periodic hair ruffling was so calming that, while he continued to cycle through apps, Felix’s grip on his phone progressively loosened.
It was nice. A familiar warmth came over him the longer he supported Felix’s weight. The realization of what it was prompted him to put down his phone and glance at his hyung, whose eyes fluttered open for a moment. His soft, trustful gaze made Jeongin feel like he was the hyung instead. More warmth poured from his heart, melting any lingering pre-performance anxieties he had.
His caregiver headspace.
He had fallen into it unknowingly, naturally.
It explained his aversion to being treated like the youngest of the group. In hindsight, he should have seen it coming, having felt off for the past few weeks. Unable to put a name to his inexplicable fluctuating moods and insecure thoughts, he had shaken it off as work-related stress, the pressure of needing to improve and show the best version of himself. Diligent practice sessions and his hyungs’ endless reassurances that he was doing well had done little to relieve the itching urge to accomplish more.
Now, he understood that performing well was not the root cause of his issues. His subconscious mind wanted to accomplish the act of being helpful, in the form of caregiving.
Prolonged gaps between Seungmin’s regression episodes did that to him.
Neglecting that side of himself left him restless, worries clouding his mind and leaving him on edge. Although he was excellent at maintaining a regular schedule to relieve his little one’s stress, he often forgot that he too needed the outlet.
Felix was almost completely slack against him. He cooed, swiping a gentle thumb over his exposed freckles.
If he put his head on Felix’s when no one was watching, that was his business.
“Hey.”
Jeongin raised his head, flushing pink at being seen so physically affectionate, to see Jisung gazing at them.
“Lix has to get his makeup done,” he whispered, unwilling to disrupt Felix’s peaceful doze.
They didn’t have to rouse him, it turned out, as Felix stirred with a sharp intake of air. “M’ up.”
“You’ll get puffy if you sleep now. Come, I’ll get you a snack to stay awake.”
Linking arms, Jisung led Felix to their styling station.
A sense of longing followed the loss of intimacy, causing Jeongin to leave his seat and search for another way to soothe himself. His mind went straight to Seungmin, who was warming up his voice in the corner.
His destination was fixed, yet his feet took a detour when he passed Hyunjin, his gangly limbs sprawled out on the floor. He was like a kid sometimes, the way he lacked coordination when he wasn’t dancing. Peacefully resting, his cheek smushed on the yoga mat, he truly did look like a baby. The sibling dynamic they had made Jeongin want to joke around, annoy him by treating him like he was younger.
Maybe a smidge of his caregiver headspace was showing.
“Does someone need a nap?”
He gushed, peering at him and plastering on one of his exaggerated grins.
Hyunjin wriggled onto his back to face him, his eyes wide with childlike innocence as he gnawed the ear of his personal Jiniret plush. A wide smile spread across his face, and Jeongin wondered if it really was a joke at all. He let out a giggle and shrugged.
Jeongin knelt down, lowering his voice. “Are you small?”
“Half,” Hyunjin admitted, squeezing Jiniret in his hands. “S’gonna fade soon.”
Squirming, he latched back onto the nub of fabric that was his plushie’s ear, his shirt riding up as he did so.
“Aw.” Jeongin poked his exposed stomach. “Baby.”
“Tickles!” Hyunjin shrieked and made a biting motion at him.
Jeongin chuckled.
“You’re such a bitey baby.”
He proceeded to pull funny faces every time Hyunjin chomped at him, giggles following the clacking of his teeth.
“Silly I.N-ie.”
He took the hand that reached for him and helped the regressor sit up.
“Thanks. I feel relaxed enough for our performance now.”
Sporting another taut smile, Jeongin hummed.
He stood and caught a glimpse of Seungmin’s watchful eyes on him. This time, he headed over to his hyung uninterrupted.
Seungmin’s singing came to an end, his lips quirked up in amusement. “What’s up Innie?”
Jeongin grabbed a nearby water bottle. “Here hyung.”
Rather than simply handing it to him, he uncapped it and held it up to his lips.
Seungmin quenched his thirst, letting out a small chuckle after the maknae pulled away.
“What?”
“You're in a caring mood today,” he observed.
Jeongin hummed, setting the bottle down. “It seems that my caregiver headspace decided to make an appearance.”
Blinking in surprise, Seungmin grinned. “Oh! All of a sudden?”
“Not exactly? I’ve been frazzled these past few weeks-”
“I noticed.”
“-and I hadn’t realized that it was because…” he trailed off as Seungmin put a hand on his shoulder.
“You needed to take care of someone,” Seungmin finished for him. “I know you feel all over the place when it’s been too long.”
“Yeah,” Jeongin breathed, placing his hand atop his hyung’s. He wanted the warmth of his presence to last as long as it possibly could before their inevitable departure to perform on stage.
“I haven’t needed my headspace recently,” Seungmin began, his smile faltering.
“And I’m glad! It means you’ve been doing better mentally.” Jeongin was quick to cut in before he could feel even an inkling of guilt about his caregiver headspace surfacing. “You mainly regress when you’re stressed. Knowing that you don’t have such a heavy load to bear anymore is, well, it’s so reassuring.”
He squeezed his hand. “That’s all I ever want for you, taking care of you. To help you be okay again.”
Seungmin smiled.
“I know, Innie. You take such good care of me. Now it’s my turn to take care of you. It’s not fair if your carer-space goes neglected because I’m doing well.” He moved closer and knocked their foreheads together. “Regressing is my form of stress relief. Caregiving is yours.”
Jeongin nodded, closing his eyes. How he wished for them to be in their dorm, cuddled up under a blanket, his little one babbling on about this and that.
“Can I take care of you later?” He whispered, craning his neck so his lips were right up against Seungmin’s ear. An uttered secret for his little one alone.
His shyness at having to ask for his caregiving needs to be fulfilled stirred a melancholic fondness in Seungmin. He was always welcome to voice his needs to his hyung, although the roles were reversed in their caregiver-little dynamic.
“Of course Innie. You can always ask me to be small for you. Regressing makes me happy, remember?” Jeongin’s eyes fluttered open as he pulled away. “I can’t promise I’ll be fully in headspace, to be honest.”
“That’s okay! I want you to be comfortable.”
His caregiver was understanding as ever.
“Either way, you can care for me like I’m small. I’d love that. It’d be the perfect way to unwind after all our hectic comeback promotions come to an end.” Intertwining their fingers, Seungmin made a promise to return all the love that Jeongin had given him. “Come to hyung whenever you need to relax, okay?”
In the back of his head, Jeongin wondered if it should have felt weird. Getting comforted despite being the caretaking figure in their relationship. His hyung reassuring him it was okay to come and treat him like a kid for his own mental satisfaction.
“Okay.”
He couldn’t manage to raise his voice above his previous hushed tone, the space they were in too open, too public, for him to admit anything aloud. Was this how Seungmin felt when confessing how close he was to teetering over the edge of his little space?
“Thank you hyung.”
“No need to thank me, maknae-yah,” Seungmin murmured, smoothing his hair. “This goes both ways.”
There was nothing weird about them needing comfort, Jeongin concluded. Age and roles aside, they were there for one another. It was as simple as that.
“Tonight, then?”
“Tonight.”
His fingers wrapped around one of Jeongin’s, Seungmin sighed and rested his head against the glass pane, illuminated by the passing streetlights and headlights.
“The window’s too hard for your head,” Jeongin murmured, pulling him away from the vibrating car door to slump on his side instead. “Better?”
Seungmin nodded, his heart swelling as Jeongin adjusted his jacket collar around his neck, zipping him all the way up to his chin. The air conditioning had been turned up a tad too chilly for his liking. How Jeongin had even noticed was beyond him.
As he let the maknae flick a few stray strands of hair off his face, he thought back to all the instances Jeongin had cared for him in the past. Regardless of how often he needed to regress, he wanted to continue as they were, for as long as they had.
‘Don’t stop’, he wanted to say, as Jeongin patted his head, as he adjusted Seungmin’s seatbelt to smooth out the wrinkles in his clothes, as he smiled down at him when his grip around Jeongin’s fingers began to slacken and held him snugly.
He loved being held.
‘Don’t stop’, he almost said, parting his lips when Jeongin snuck a kiss to his temple, hidden under his own turned-up jacket collar.
The car then came to a stop.
“We’re home.” Jeongin chuckled at his sudden pout. “We can continue this inside, if you still want to.”
“Of course I do,” Seungmin blurted out. He moved to get out and found Jeongin’s finger still trapped in his loose fist.
Jeongin was never going to pull away first. He didn’t need to be told to keep going.
He’d always be there. For as long as Seungmin would have him.
A shower and an armful of Daengmo later, Seungmin was on his way to bid his dorm-mates goodnight. After visiting Felix’s room, he headed to Minho’s, finding Chan lying on the bed fiddling with his tan bunny security blanket.
“Oh, you're here?”
Chan craned his neck to look at him. “Papa?”
“No Channie, I’m Seungmin.”
“Wan’ papa.” Chan pouted.
“Is he not around? He might still be washing up then.” Seungmin moved toward him. “How about I keep you company?”
Chan rolled over and made grabby hands for him, letting go of his bunny blanket in the process.
Seungmin went to scoop him into his arms, not noticing the comfort item on the ground until his foot collided with the cloth.
“Our sweet Channie-”
He froze, one knee on the bed, watching the brown bundle skid across the floor and disappear under the bed.
Oh no.
“Minnie, papa gone,” Chan whined.
“No, little duck, I'm sure he'll be back soon.” Seungmin quickly settled in front of the little leader and embraced him. “Your papa's getting everything done for the night so he can come and spend all his time with our precious Channie.”
Chan rubbed his eyes, letting out another tired whine.
“Sleepy duckling,” Seungmin cooed.
Blinking hard, Chan patted the space around him. “Buh…bunny…where bunny?”
“It fell off the bed Channie, let me get it for you.”
Seungmin released him, freezing when Chan whined louder and clutched at his arms. Not wanting to upset him, he gave Chan another hug.
“I know you want to cuddle but I can't get your bunny if I stay up here.”
“Papa gone. Minnie no go.” Chan scrunched his face up, real tears threatening to slip from his crescent eyes.
“I'm not leaving,” he said, keeping a hand on Chan's thigh as he slid off the bed and ducked under it, his heart sinking when he saw just how far away the security blanket really was. He tried to grab it, stretching his entire arm out only to skim the edge of the comfort item.
“B-bun?” Chan’s voice wobbled.
Seungmin sighed. “I'm sorry Channie, it’s too far. I can't reach it like this.”
A silent pause followed.
“Channie?”
He winced as Chan burst into tears.
“No papa! No bunny!” He wailed, squirming and burying his face in the sheets.
“Lee Know hyung's gonna be back any minute now. We can get your bunny back, I promise!”
His attempts to reassure Chan were met with resistance, his back rubs shaken off and his offer of Daengmo pushed aside with more cries.
“Is everything okay?”
Jeongin poked his head in the room, frowning at the sight of their beloved leader crying.
“He's sleepy and wants Lee Know hyung,” Seungmin explained, his gaze falling to Chan's shaking frame. “He also dropped his bunny blanket and I accidentally kicked it under the bed.”
“It happens.” Walking over, Jeongin knelt down and succeeded in retrieving the blanket, brushing the dust off.
“Channie look! Innie got your bunny back!” Seungmin exclaimed.
Sniffling, Chan faced them and saw Jeongin holding it. Instead of cheering up, however, more tears streamed down his cheeks.
“Papa!” He cried out, weakly thrashing about.
Seungmin wasn’t sure what more they could do to calm him. Jeongin seemed to know, handing him Chan’s bunny before clambering onto the bed. “Hold onto this friend for him.”
He then started to card through Chan’s hair with a gentle “shh, it’s okay.”
“Pa,” Chan blubbered, allowing Jeongin to keep petting him. The soothing motion calmed him enough for the maknae to pull him into his lap.
“Our poor Channie. You must’ve been so tired and stressed all these days, hm?” He spoke with a slight lilt, light pats on Chan’s back coaxing him to reply with a disgruntled noise. “You just wanted a nice cozy night with your papa and bunny, but papa’s been gone for so long, yeah? And then you lost your bunny.”
“Pa b’ny,” Chan slurred.
“Mhm, the bunny your papa gave you. That must have been so frustrating!”
He rocked Chan, cradling his head close. “You’re sleepy, no papa and no bunny? How unfair! Of course you’re gonna have a little cry about that. I know I would have. Waiting is so hard when you’re alone.”
His caregiver voice, all too familiar to Seungmin’s ears, airy like cotton candy and dripping like honey, had the intended effect on Chan, his cries dwindling. Even if he didn’t pay attention to Jeongin’s words, the way in which they were said was soothing enough to placate him. He lifted his head, giggling when Jeongin leaned down to bump their noses together.
“You aren’t alone anymore!” He gushed. “Channie has us!”
Gesturing for Seungmin to return the bunny, he tucked it in Chan’s arms before hugging him close. His fond stare, his steady knee bouncing, the rhythmic “shh-shh-shh” that caused Chan to melt into him, had Seungmin’s heart fluttering.
It was as if he was falling in love with his dada all over again.
He had always been so caring, so sweet, that Seungmin couldn’t see himself choosing anyone else to be his person.
“Channie got a little fussy, hm? That’s okay!”
“F’sy,” Chan mumbled, yawning and burrowing his head into Jeongin’s chest.
“Aigo, what am I going to do with such a cutie?” Jeongin asked, pleasantly surprised when Chan, still pressed against him, babbled unintelligible words. It was so rare to hear his baby babble.
Seungmin clutched his stuffed dog, grinning wide. He must have gotten comfortable enough with Jeongin to be his unrestrained, regressed self.
“Oh? Channie’s so sleepy but has so much to say! I must write all of this down for your papa!”
Jeongin beamed, his heart bursting at the seams from pure, unbridled joy at having his caregiving urges be fulfilled. Taking care of Seungmin later would be the icing on the cake.
“That won’t be necessary.”
Three heads turned to find Minho lurking in the doorway.
Chan all but screeched as he laid eyes on his main caregiver. “Pa!”
“Yes, my ducky. Papa’s here now.” Minho laughed and took him into his arms.
“Your baby missed you,” Jeongin informed him.
“Did he now?” Minho wiped his tear tracks. “Was ten minutes too long for my Channie? I’m sorry cub, it must have felt like forever.”
“Pa.” Snuggling him, Chan clung to his clothing, refusing to let him go for the rest of the night.
Jeongin smiled, taking Seungmin’s hand. “We’ll leave you be.”
“Good night hyung, night Channie!” Seungmin chirped.
They made their way to Seungmin’s room. From the bed, Jeongin saw Seungmin rummage through his closet for his starry blanket.
“Is there anything you want me to do?” He asked.
Seungmin found the blanket and thrust it in Jeongin’s lap.
“Can we just cuddle?”
“Sure.”
Guiding him to lie down, Jeongin kissed his head and tucked him in. He crawled in after turning off the lights, wrapping himself around his hyung and adjusting the blanket around them. Smiling, he brushed his thumb over Seungmin’s cheek.
“Happy, Innie?” Seungmin couldn’t help but mirror his smile.
“So happy,” he murmured. “I missed this.”
Seungmin took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, his body going pliant in Jeongin’s arms. “Aw. Don’t worry, I’ll always be your pup.”
His pink-tinged cheeks were pressed to the crook of Jeongin’s neck as he was held more securely, his palm resting on Jeongin’s chest. He could feel the rise and fall of his breaths and the gentle thrum of his heart beating underneath.
Jeongin pressed a tender kiss to the top of his head. His past stress seemed to melt into nothingness. The only thing that mattered was Seungmin, right here, in his arms.
“My pup,” he whispered, starting to sing a quiet lullaby.
Seungmin found himself drifting, curling up small as his eyes closed.
“My da,” he whispered back.
The next day was a well-deserved day off for the group to rest and recover from their hectic schedules.
Jeongin woke up bright and early, a night of caring for regressors plus adequate sleep having rejuvenated him. He washed up, ordered some breakfast, and waited in his room for it to arrive.
Now that his head felt much clearer, he assessed the drastic change in his mood from something as simple as caregiving. It had really lifted his spirits. He wanted to continue to fulfil those instincts of his without waiting until they negatively impacted his mental state.
Determined to be more intentional about his headspace, he sifted through his accessories and came across what he was looking for.
His moon ring.
He slid it on, his lips quirking into a smile when he remembered Seungmin’s overjoyed text at having received his own matching one so many years ago. It served as a reminder of their relationship, a ribbon around his finger, an unspoken promise.
Seungmin found him some time later, eating breakfast at the table. Greeting him with a quick hair ruffle, he noticed the younger fiddling with something on his finger. Upon closer inspection, he recognized it at once.
“That’s our couple ring! You still wear it?”
“Sometimes, when I’m in the mood.” Jeongin shrugged. “Sleep well?”
Seungmin had slept better than well. He had woken up excited for their break, a part of him wanting to spend much of his free time in headspace now that he had the chance to do so.
“Mhm.”
He decided to keep it to himself for now, formulating a plan in his head.
“How did my favourite caregiver sleep with his favourite pup?” He teased.
Jeongin chewed slowly, delaying his answer.
“I really needed that,” he confessed, so earnest that Seungmin didn’t have it in him to fluster him further.
“We can do it again.” With another ruffle of Jeongin’s hair, Seungmin left, his idea cemented further.
He would have breakfast, put on his ring and be all matchy-matchy with his dada! Then he would regress, Innie would care for him, everything was going to be perfect.
Everything was not perfect.
He couldn’t find his ring.
He had searched every corner of his room, every drawer, shelf, and inch of his closet to no avail.
His silver moon ring was nowhere to be found.
All of the gifts Jeongin had given him were so precious, he took the utmost care of them. The ring had been one of the first, how could he have lost it?
“I have to find it Daengmo,” he muttered, checking his selection of regression toys in case it had gotten mixed up in the pile. “I just gotta match Innie so he knows I care.”
Not finding it there either, he collapsed on his haunches in defeat.
“What am I gonna do?”
Swiping his thumb over his lips, he glanced at the limp stuffie on his bed, wondering how on earth he was going to face his caregiver.
Outside, multiple voices could be heard. He crept over to their source, the living room, and snuck a peek around the edge of the wall to see all the members of the other dorm plus Minho conversing.
Hyunjin, perched in Jisung’s lap, idly suckled his pacifier, his gaze bouncing around the room while 3racha chatted about some song they were working on and Minho worked on peeling some fruit for them.
Upon laying eyes on Seungmin, Hyunjin squeaked and pointed at him, smiling wide.
“What is it Hyun?” Jisung glanced at where he was looking. “Minnie, hi!”
“We haven’t had a collective day off since our last comeback. Hyunjinnie really wanted to spend time with all his caregivers,” Changbin explained, smoothing out Hyunjin’s hair as he bobbed his head up and down.
“Are you small, Minnie?” Chan held his arms out at once, eyeing the thumb that remained in Seungmin’s mouth.
“I-um, I…”
He twisted the edge of his shirt, recognizing the fuzziness in his head brought on by his struggle to find the accessory he needed. He didn’t want to regress just yet, not without his planned surprise, but he was already slipping.
“You want me to get I.N-ah for you?” Minho turned his head, about to call for the maknae.
“No!”
Seungmin rushed in to stop him, tears springing to his eyes. “N-no, please don’t. I can’t tell him, he can’t know!”
His hands flew up to his face as he stifled a sob.
“Tell him what, hun?” Chan caught him and brought him into a gentle embrace. “What’s gotten our pup so worked up, hm?”
“My ring! My ring’s gone!” Seungmin hiccuped, chewing the tips of his fingers. “Dada’s gonna be so sad. Got it fo’ me n’ I lost it.”
“It’s okay Minnie, you didn’t lose it on purpose,” Changbin said, thumbing away his tears as Felix and Jeongin returned from the kitchen.
“What if he never gives me anything ever again because I lost it?” Unaware that his caregiver was a few feet away, Seungmin let out a pitchy mewl, reaching up to tangle his fingers in his hair. “M’ so careless.”
Jeongin gasped, alerting Seungmin of his presence. His eyes went wide, filling with fresh tears as Jeongin made his way to him.
“Pup, don’t talk about yourself like that.” He tugged Seungmin’s hands away from his head. “My sweet little one is so careful. Do you really think I’d hold a grudge because you lost something?”
He knelt down and sat Seungmin in his lap.
“Can you tell me what you lost? Maybe we can find it if we look for it together.”
Seungmin shook his head, staying silent apart from the sobs escaping his bitten lips.
“I promise I won’t be mad.”
Hyunjin removed his pacifier with a wet pop, easing partially out of his headspace. “Don’ worry Minnie. I’m always losing the couple rings Felix got me, and he doesn’t mind!”
Seungmin did his best to glare at him, which was hard to do when tears kept spilling from his eyes and his head felt funny.
“Yeah, it’s not his fault they keep getting misplaced when we have to change jewelry so often for stages.” Felix smiled at Seungmin. “I gave him a backup set so we could match.”
“About that…”
“You still have them, right?”
“Uh…” Hyunjin shrank under his gaze and popped his pacifier back in his mouth.
Felix sighed, shaking his head fondly. “What am I going to do with you?”
He pinched Hyunjin’s cheek.
Jeongin ran his hands over Seungmin’s shoulders. “Is that it? Did you lose a ring?”
Snivelling, Seungmin grasped his hand, feeling for the thin metal band he had seen earlier. He lifted it close to his face once he found it, locking his eyes on the moon ring to avoid meeting Jeongin’s.
“Wan’ed matchy wif dada,” he said, his lower lip quivering.
“Your moon ring’s gone?” Jeongin finally understood. “Oh baby, it’s alright! I lose things all the time!”
Jeongin leaned closer, petting the back of Seungmin’s head in the way that made him feel protected.
“I’d probably lose my butt if it wasn’t attached to my body,” he whispered conspiratorially in Seungmin’s ear, making him giggle. “Oh, did my baby remember how to laugh? I was worried you’d forgotten!”
“Butt,” Seungmin whispered back, giggling louder. “Siwy!”
Jeongin blew a raspberry on his temple, grinning and sticking his tongue out when Seungmin squirmed away with peals of laughter. “I am silly, aren’t I? Your silly dada.”
Seungmin looped his arms around the maknae’s neck, the latter cupping his face in his palms.
“It hurts my heart to see you cry, pup. You don’t have to be scared of what I’ll think, okay?”
“Dada.” Seungmin bumped his forehead to Jeongin’s, getting up on his tiptoes. “Up!”
“Up? You want up?”
Jeongin squealed, kissing his head and lifting him onto his hip. Seungmin was calling him dada, speaking in one word sentences and wanted to be carried? He had definitely slipped to babyspace.
Jeongin was ecstatic. “My baby’s so tiny today, oh my gosh!”
Someone cleared their voice, bursting whatever bubble the pair had been in.
“Do you want us to help look for Minnie’s ring?” Changbin offered.
Jeongin’s ears burned red-hot as he found six expectant stares on him, realizing he had kissed Seungmin in front of them.
“It’ll be like a treasure hunt!” Felix clapped his hands together.
Seeing Seungmin’s gummy smile as he copied Felix’s clapping, his movements clumsy and his feet swinging, Jeongin thought he would move mountains for his pup. They all would.
“I think he’d really appreciate that.”
Four members were tasked with searching for the ring, since Jeongin’s arms were occupied by Seungmin and Minho proceeded to drag Chan along with him to go grocery shopping.
“While you’re out, can you get us something?” The maknae requested, sending his two eldest hyungs on a private quest.
As the others searched the various areas of their living space, shouting to each other while turning the dorm upside down to hunt for Seungmin’s accessory, Jeongin carried said little to each room to observe his hyungs.
“I don’t think you meant to slip so young. That’s okay though, I love taking care of you no matter how big or itty-bitty you are.” Jeongin ended his impromptu tour in Seungmin’s room, keeping up a one-sided conversation to fill the air. “I’m sorry you got here because you were so stressed out over your ring.”
Seungmin was in his own world, wriggling and gasping in awe at everything around him. Jeongin chuckled at his childlike wonder.
“You’re adorable.”
He let Seungmin peer at whatever seemed interesting for a few minutes, letting out an abrupt laugh when Seungmin patted his face with a pout.
“What is it pup?”
Seungmin tilted his head and smiled.
“You wanna listen to dada talk some more?” Jeongin couldn’t help but kiss his fingers as they tapped his lips again. “Anything for you. Let’s see…I think I’d like to read to you.”
That was how Changbin found them, huddled under the stars (or rather, Seungmin’s blanket) reading a colourful picture book.
“Special delivery!”
Somehow, he managed to carry Hyunjin and a small plastic bag at the same time, walking in to give the latter to Jeongin.
“Any luck?”
“Nah.” Changbin adjusted Hyunjin on his hip, seeming to not care about the regressor gnawing on his shoulder in place of his pacifier, now dangling from a clip attached to his shirt. “What did the hyungs get you?”
Jeongin unwrapped the goodies in the bag to reveal two ring pops.
“Minnie? Here.” He held the candy out in front of Seungmin’s face, diverting his attention from the colourful shapes that had been distracting him.
Seungmin gasped, his gaze flitting between the treats being offered to him and his dada’s encouraging grin.
“Now we can be all matchy-matchy like you wanted!”
Bouncing in place, Seungmin let out a gleeful shriek.
“You both really are kids,” Changbin said, smiling at the scene. “Come on Hyunie, let’s get some food in your tummy.”
As soon as they were alone, Seungmin put his hand out for Jeongin to slide the ring onto, admiring it as Jeongin wore the other one. He then bumped their rings together, snuggling closer.
“Ah, if you’re going to have the candy now, I should get some wipes for your face so it won’t be sticky.”
Jeongin felt a tap on his shoulder. “Yes?”
Seungmin made grabby hands for his backpack on the floor.
“Do you have wipes in there?”
Seungmin nodded, already giving his candy nub a lick.
“So helpful,” Jeongin praised. “I’ll get them.”
He moved to the floor and checked every pocket, being sure to leave everything in its place as he searched for the pack of wipes. In a small inner pocket, however, he came across something small and solid, cool to the touch.
Intrigued, he pulled it out.
“Seungmin!”
He ran over to the regressor and showed him the round piece of metal he had found.
“Moon!” Seungmin shouted, eagerly shoving his book out of the way to replace it with his free hand.
“I found your moon ring!” Jeongin fitted it on the same finger on Seungmin that he was wearing his own ring on. “See? You’re so careful, you put it in a special pocket. You just forgot where it was, that’s all.”
Seungmin grabbed Jeongin in a crushing hug, rolling onto his back. The maknae cackled as he went down, reciprocating his energy with equal force.
“Even if we never found it, I wouldn’t mind. It’s not as important as you,” he declared, nuzzling Seungmin’s nose with his. “Your happiness is my everything.”
Ducked under the blanket, he whispered to his baby, peppering his face with kisses in between each phrase. “I love you. I love you so much. Seungminnie, I love you with all my heart. Big or tiny or somewhere in the middle, always, I do.”
They would tell the rest of the group about their discovery later.
Right now, Seungmin had something more important to say.
In a bout of mental clarity, he firmly grabbed Jeongin’s face and pressed their foreheads together.
“Jeongin.” He huffed a breathy laugh, blindly finding Jeongin’s moon-ringed-hand and linking their pinkies together, their promise of being pup and dada together against the world on both of their minds. “My Innie, my dada, my caregiver until the end of forever.”
Jeongin already knew what he was going to say, curling his pinky tighter.
“I love you to the moon and back!”