Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Allura, did you have any siblings?"

"Yes. I had a sister, I loved her dearly. But she was always acting strangely."

"How so?"

"She never enjoyed shopping with me, always acted rebellious, and was looking at other men at a very young age."

Lance couldn't stand to hear the paladins talk to Allura about her family. He had known for some time that he and Allura were related, but he never told anyone.

The thing is, lance is trans. He was born into the wrong body, too feminine, He hated it. His sister, Allura never listened to him, no matter how many times he said it. She never understood.

Lance left the room, he couldn't deal with this. He ran to his room once he was out of sight from the paladins, His face cascaded in tears. He removed his binder and let his lateen form take over.

Lance stared at himself in the mirror, thinking to himself. Why was I born this way?

His white hair long and wavy, caramel skin now marked with glowing pink lines across his body. And the two arrow head shaped marks on his cheeks.

He felt trapped, his breathing quickened. His vision blurred as he changed back to his human form. He curled up into a ball on his bathroom floor, back against the cabinets.

He couldn't breathe, he couldn't hear anything through the pounding in his skull.

Something touched his chest and he flinched, looking up to see who it was. He could see the blurry form of hunk and let the fear fade. His panic attack receded to a faint buzzing in the back of his skull and he looked up at his best friend.

Hunk knew lance was trans, he was the only one.

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"Everyone, i have an announcement" pidge stated, taking a deep breath. "Im non binary and I go by they/them pronouns." they said quickly.

Everyone else in the room had smiled and told them they supported them.

Lance had no idea what to say, he left the room.

Lance had decided to go to the observatory, to stare at the stars. It wasnt until keith had a asked him why he was crying that he notices the tears falling from his eyes.

"Its nothing keith, dont worry about it"

Lance walked back to his room, wiping away the tears in his eyes. Once the door shut he was hit with a memory.

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"Lilani, why wont you go shopping with me?" a beautiful young lady with pink markings on her cheeks, an altean tiara placed gently upon her head.

"Because i dont want to wear those dresses you always buy for me." he said. "Theyre too girly." allura stared at him bewildered "lilani, you are a girl. Not a boy. Were going shopping." lances face had become saddened as he obediantly followed his older sister.

While at the space mall, lance took to staring at all the outfits he could have been wearing if only he had been born a boy. And all the men who were weraring them. He wished so badly to be those men, to wear such masculin clothing.

"Lilani, stop staring at those men. You are too young to be courted."

"Sorry."

Once lance and allura returned to the castle, allura turned to him with a grin. "Lets do a fashion show." she squealed.

Lilani turned towards her. "Do i get a choice?" she asked.

"Not really."

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Lance didn't know when pidge had entered the room. But they had been staring at him for a while.

"Hey lance." they said cheerfully, though there was an undertone to it that sounded as though they were upset.

"oh , hi pidge. How are you? Im sorry i didnt say anything earlier, just got a little overwhelmed." he responded. Pidge looked at him curiously.

"Overwhelmed? Why would you be overwhelmed?"

"Oh, it has nothing to do with you dont worry. Just not so happy childhood memories."

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"No I'll be fine, thanks for the offer though."

"Anytime lance, night."

"Night."

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"Lilani!" allura called. "There will be a ball this evening, we need to select your outfit!"

Lance despised balls, he hated how he had to wear an extravagant dress that showed off his feminine traits. He hates the makeup he had to wear. He hated the fancy hairdo's. His face gave off that of a distraught expression. Plump pink lips downturned, ocean blue eyes glazed over and glassy.

Lance begrudginly and obediantly followed allura to his wardrobe. a large walk in closet filled top to bottom in fancy dresses, shoes, and coats. He felt sick, staring at the dresses that made him feel so caged, so feminine.

"What about this one?" allura asked, holding up a lavendar dress with an empire waist. It had white lace along the neckline and shoulder length sleeves, there were small diamonds placed in a delicate manner to create a juniberry flower design on the right waist.

"Too fancy."

"Alright, ooh! How about this one?" she held up a navy blue strap dress, the waist lined with golden dust. The fabric was smooth and had a velvety texture. A slit rid up on either side of the dress, ending at the mid thigh.

"No way!" lance shouted, his face molded into one of disgust. Nose scrunched up eyes fixated in a glare. It made him look even more feminine.

"Fine, how about this one?" this one was a simple just below the knee length sky blue colour that faded into a navy blue near the bottom, it had silver gemstones from a foreign planet that made the dress the bottom reflect that of a starry night on the planet earth. high waisted, and long sleeves.

"Fine, it's the best and simplest one so far. I guess it will have to do."

"Yay."

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"Lance! Are you paying attention?" shiro scolded, lance glanced at shiro.

"W-what? Sorry i wasn't paying attention."

"Well, since some of us werent paying attention." shiro glared, "i suppose i'll have to tell everyone all over again." everyone groaned.

"We are searching for new allies, so we are going to host a ball where everyone is welcome. As a charity event for those who are in need, and a way to gain new allies in the war against the galra."

Lance's face paled. "A ball?" he asked, voice wavering with fear.

"Yes lance, a ball. Are you alright?" keith questioned, his face molded into one that showed concern, his features softening.

"Y-yeah im fine? im fine." he reassured himself, which only made the teams concern grow.

Allura however was upset by this, "Lance! What is your problem? This is for a good cause and you are shutting it down for your own selfish reasons? You should be ashamed of yourself." lance looked down, tears cascaded his face.

"Your right, I'm sorry for being selfish." he turned around and ran to his room.

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Lance wanted to puke, He was hideous. He stood outside the doors to the ballroom, waiting.

What was he waiting for?

Lance took a deep breath, pushed the doors open, and took a step.

"Welcome, Princess Lilani of Altea."

Lance blocked out the welcome.

just focus on breathing.

Don't cause a scene.

"Lilani! What took you so long? Father has been waiting for a while now." Allura reprimanded, however Lance did not hear her. He felt caged, He couldn't breathe.

Somebody save him!

Lance felt faint, his vision blurry.

"Lilani?" coran inquired, walking over to where the royal children stood. "Are you alright?"

Dont call me that, lance thought. Before everything went black.

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"It's fine, everything is fine." Lance whispered, "it's fine, i'm fine."

"Lance?" pidge asked, they stood at the dorr just outside lance's room.

"Yes pidge i'm fine." Lance grumbled. Why was everyone asking him this?

"What's going on lance? You can tell me, we're friends."

"Yeah i know, but it's just so hard. I've never told anyone."

"Are you trans?"

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"Yes."

Pidge looked up at lance for a moment, then they went up and hugged him.

"You know we'll all support you if you choose to come out." they said

"I know, but it's more than just that."

"What could possibly be holding you back?"

"Allura."

Pidge glanced at lance, confused, they asked. "Allura. Why her?"

Lance took a breath, looked pidge dead in the eye. "She's my sister."

Chapter Text

"She's your sister?" pidge asked?

Lance let his altean form return, his long wavy white hair that gave off the faintest glow. The pink markings on his cheek that symbolised altea. He stood breathing heavily in front of Pidge, "I don't know how to tell the sister who has believed that I'm a girl, that her sister is a boy." Just then, the doors to Lance's room burst open and allura came barreling through.

"Lance, I came here to apologize about earlier...." she glanced up at lance, and gasped. "Lilani? What are you doing here. And where is lance?"

Pidge glanced between the two, unsure of what to say. "This is lance allura, and he is your brother."

Allura looked flabbergasted, "what are you talking about? This is clearly my younger sister lilani."

Lance shook. He was at a cross between feeling enraged at his elder sister, and fear that everyone would find out and hate him. "No! I am your brother allura. Always have been, always will." his brain felt fuzzy, he couldn't process what he was saying. "How do you think it felt? Hmm? Always wearing those big fancy dresses? I felt caged, scared of what everyone would think of me when they found out." tears cascaded down his face. "Im a boy."

Allura started, how had she not noticed? How could she not see the signs? It had been so obvious, yet she was to blind to see that her own sist-- her own brother was suffering?

She didn't know what to do, so she just turned tail and dashed out of the blue paladin's room.

Lance collapsed, his back hitting the bed frame as he sobbed.

He let his human form return, his short hair fading to a deep brown, the marks fading from his caramel skin.

Pidge sat there, rubbing their hand on his back. "It's okay lance, it's gonna be okay."

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Lance couldn't see, everything was black. Yet he felt so... safe.

There was a sound. It was a light beeping, similar to that of a cryo-pod.

Lance opened his eyes just as the door swished open, he glanced around. He glanced up and noticed some people staring him down, they weren't altean.

Where was he?

"Who- who are you?" lance asked. "Better yet, what are you?" they gave Lance a confused look, and an older lady with brown hair and dark caramel skin similar to that of his own spoke up.

"We are people? What else would we be?" lance gave a skeptical glance.

"Where are your markings? Where am i?"

A younger looking woman around lance's age spoke up "what markings? And you're in cuba."

Cuba? What was a cuba? "What is that?"

This time an older male spoke. unlike the others, his skin seems darker much like alfor, and allura. "Cuba is a country in south america."

"What planet is this?"

The older woman from before gave a curious glance at lance, "earth, what other planet would it be?"

Lance's eyes went wide, why wasn't he in altea? What was he doing on a different planet?

Lance stood up, "how long have i been asleep?" "last time I checked humans lived in caves and stuff."

A young boy chuckled, "caves? Humans have not lived in caves for thousands of years."

This made lance falter, "years? As in deca-Phoebes?" everyone stared at him, "and thousands? Is anyone still alive?"

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Lance stood, "thanks for the help pidge, but i think i'm going to sleep now."

"Alright, call me if you need anything lance."

"Sure, night pidge."

"Night lance."

Lance got changed to his pyjamas, grabbed his headphones and lied in his bed. He pressed play on his phone and let the sound of the lyrics wash over him.

No, your mom don't get it

And your dad don't get it

Uncle John don't get it

And you can't tell grandma

'Cause her heart can't take it

And she might not make it

They say, "don't dare, don't you even go there

Cutting off your long hair

You do as you're told"

Tell you, "wake up, go put on your makeup

This is just a phase you're gonna outgrow"

There's something wrong in the village

In the village, oh

They stare in the village

In the village, oh

There's nothing wrong with you

It's true, it's true

There's something wrong with the village

With the village

There's something wrong with the village

Feel the rumors follow you from Monday all the way to Friday dinner

You got one day of shelter, then it's Sunday hell to pay, you young lost sinner

Well I've been there, sitting in that same chair

Whispering that same prayer half a million times

It's a lie though buried in disciples

One page of the Bible isn't worth a life

There's something wrong in the village

In the village, oh

They stare in the village

In the village, oh

There's nothing wrong with you

It's true, it's true

There's something wrong with the village

With the village

There's something wrong with the village

There's something wrong in the village

In the village, oh

They stare in the village

In the village, oh

There's nothing wrong with you

It's true, it's true

There's something wrong with the village

With the village

There's something wrong with the village

So caught up in your expectations,

You're tryna make me live your dream.

But i'm causing you so much frustration,

And you only want what's best for me,

You wanted me to show more interest,

To always keep a big bright smile,

Be the dinky little perfect princess,

But i'm not that type of child,

And the storm is rising inside of me,

Don't you feel thet oour worlds collide,

It's getting harder to breathe,

It hurts deep inside,

Just let me be who i am,

It's what you really need to understand,

An i hope so hard for the pain to go away,

And it's torturing me,

But i can't break free,

So i cry and cry but just wont get it out,

The silent scrream--

Lance didn't know when he had fallen asleep, but he had woken up abruptly to the sound of alarms going off. He shot out of bed and rushed to put on his armour. Lance raced out of his room, dashing towards the control room.

"Lance, good job you made it here before everyone else." shiro praised. Lance beamed up at the slightly taller male before spotting a certain altean brooding in the corner of the room. "Allura? What are you doing?" he questioned as if the previous night had never occurred.

At that moment everyone else burst through the door to discuss ball attire.

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Allura stood off to the sidelines offering her opinion when needed. She found her eyes tracing back to lance every few seconds, This boy was really her brother? The realization crept in, her eyes blew wide.

This boy was really her brother.

She was snapped out of her stupor when said boy began speaking, "everyone, i have an announcement-- well technically it's two announcements. Anyway, um so number one." he takes a breath, "im trans." lance glances around the room for a moment, gauging people's reactions before continuing. "And number two, I'm Allura's brother, I was born the youngest daughter of altea." this time shiro, keith, hunk, and coran all gasp.

"I don't actually know the full story." he started, as his body returned to it's altean state. "However, from what I remember, I was attending a ball. Believe it or not, ball's weren't my favourite thing back then." allura looked down at the floor with a guilty expression. "I was wearing a sky blue dress, it faded to a darker blue at the bottom. There were the silver gemstones speckled accross the dark blue spots, which made it look like a starry night sky back on earth." "while at the ball, I was trying to keep my mind off the fact that I was wearing a dress, I didn't want tocause a scene. I faintly remember Allura yelling at me for being late, but I'm not sure. Coran called out to me but everything had gone black." he took a deep breath in, "the next thing i knew i was waking up in a pod on earth." allura glanced up at lance.

"I think i can answer a few of your questions," she stated. "You had passed out from a lack of breath, and we had placed you in a pod. However the next day was the last day before altea dissapeared." allura's face molded into one of deep sadness. "You were in a pod, and father had suggested that we send you off to a safer planet." that's all i remember before we were placed in pods as well"

Lance and allura gazed at eachother for a moment, before allura spoke up. "I'm sorry I hadn't noticed earlier lance."

"It's alright allura, I never said anything. Besides, you know now."

~fin