Chapter Text
01:43AM
Roosters,
Downtown
“See? I told you,” slurs Tucker over the music. “There ain’t nobody this sexy motherfucker can’t get. Once you get a piece of The Tucker, it’s all you want.”
“All you want, huh?” snides Church, just as drunk.
“Yeah, that’s right, asshole!” Tucker jabs a finger Church’s way. “So— so you can wipe that bitch-ass smirk off your face.”
“Sure,” says Church. “Sorry that I find it hard to take someone who refers to themselves in the third person seriously.”
“You’re just jealous ‘cause that hot girl just gave me her number ‘stead of you.”
“Like I give a shit, bitch. And like I told you yesterday, me and Tex are back together.” Church downs the dregs of his glass, leans across the bar to get the bartender’s attention.
“What?” scoffs Tucker. He swirls his own glass. The ice cubes inside clink together, unheard over the beat of the dance floor. “The personal trainer chick? Dude, really? I’m like ninety percent sure she’s a lesbian.”
“You say that about any girl that could beat your ass,” points out Church. He scowls as he’s ignored by the barman in favour of a group of giggly girls. “Especially the ones that don’t want to fuck you, dickward.”
“I can get anyone to fuck me,” replies Tucker.
“Alright then,” Church takes out his irritation on Tucker. “If you’re so fucking confident. What about that new fucker that moved in down the hall last month?”
Tucker goes silent. “You know I don’t do crazies,” he eventually shouts over the music.
“Oh, ho, ho,” laughs Church, falls back down onto his stool. He stresses, “Three words for you, jackass: Kaikaina-fucking-Grif.”
“Do not bring Kai into this! We— that was completely different. I was sixteen, dude. Besides, she’s not crazy, she’s freaky. Riding-your-dick-whilst-eating-a-hot-dog-freaky.”
Church gives a dead stare. “I did not need to know that.”
“Cat guy’s just sad.”
“I thought there was no one The Tucker couldn’t get?”
“Have you maybe thought The Tucker doesn’t want him?”
“Three hundred dollars,” announces Church.
“What?”
“That’s how confident I am you can’t do it,” continues Church. “Let’s make a bet.” He raises a single index finger. “One month. If you can convince him to fuck you by the end of the month, I’ll pay out, if you can't, then you gotta pay up instead.”
“…That’s real fucked up, Church.” Tucker smothers a smirk. “You’re a real fucked up guy. Like fuck I’m gonna agree to that.”
“Oh, come on, Tucker. It’ll be fun. Don’t be a pussy.”
Tucker raises a shaved eyebrow.
“Look, asshole. You need the money, right?” he pauses, leans in to goad, “Or are you just gonna have to admit you aren’t the big fucking hotshot you think you are?”
The two friends scrutinise one another intensely before Church breaks out into a laugh. Tucker joins in.
Tucker runs a sloppy hand over his face. “Ah, Jesus fuck. Fine.” He offers a cocky grin. “But just so you know, you’ve just lost three hundred dollars.”
They shake on it.