Chapter Text
When Herb handed her the paper, she opened it with a frown. Quite confused as to why he thought it was huge news. However as she read it over, her face faltered. It was a kill order, for Ronnie and Anita Gill. Instantly she felt sick to her stomach.
“Have you told anyone else about this?” She asked Herb with a horrified expression.
He merely shook his head ‘no’. She nodded as she tried to control her breathing. They didn’t deserve this, she thought. “Keep this to yourself then.” She ordered as she stormed off in a huff. Immediately she made her way to the restroom, since she wasn’t sure if she were going to vomit or not. She could feel the bile rising in her throat. Quickly she pocketed the paper as she roughly pushed the door open, while demanding that everyone get out before slamming the door unceremoniously.
She paced back and forth, clutching her stomach as she did so. That fucker. This entire time, he had been the one to kill her parents...suddenly she found it hard to breathe as she was bombarded with all the memories of her last few encounters with Five before she had revealed her true colors. Oh god ...she actually fucked the man who killed her parents. Just the sheer realization was enough to send her into one of the stalls to retch up the bile that has been building in the back of her throat this entire time.
Though the sick feeling wouldn’t go away even as she expelled the contents of her belly. She found herself sliding down to the floor unable to hold back the tears. This revelation was sheer agony. Knowing her parents were assassinated was bad enough, but finding out that Five was the one who carried out the order, continued to make her feel nauseous. Had her mum known about the kill order? Five was her favorite pet to order around after all. She had to have known the entire time as the bitter taste of betrayal still stuck to the roof of Lila’s mouth.
There was no way she could hold her anger back as she made her way to her mother’s office, holding up the paper that was quite literally her parents’ death sentence.
“My parents were murdered...” She stated, handing the paper over to the Handler. “And I know who did it.” She added looking away as she dropped herself down on the nearest chair and brought her knees up to her chest to hug them tightly. “Five killed them...and AJ Carmichael signed the order. They made me an orphan.” She choked back a sob, absolutely gutted by the revelation as speaking the words aloud made them even more real in her mind.
She was so caught up in her own pain and anguish that she hadn’t noticed her mother tense up or show visible relief at her words. Nor had she noticed her mother reaching for her letter opener to arm herself.
“Darling, you’re not an orphan.” The Handler finally spoke, sitting down beside her. “You still have me...we have each other.” She said gently in that way that always makes Lila feel comforted but at the same time apprehensive. As much as Lila wanted to deny it, her mother was always scheming and she honestly was not sure that the Handler wouldn’t turn on her if it suited her. It was one of the reasons, she was not comfortable with the idea of her mother holding ultimate power, but there wasn’t much she could do about that. Especially after Five had murdered the board of directors for her mother and a hollow promise to get his family back to their proper timeline.
Finally Lila looked up at her mother unable to keep her tears at bay. “Did you know they did this? Five has always been one of your favorites.” She asked point blank, unfortunately she was unable to hide the utter look of betrayal on her face as she said Five’s name again. Her expression giving her away, despite her hope to keep it all buried. While she had really thought that she loved Diego, she was quickly coming to realize that she had felt a connection to Five that she just didn’t quite feel for Diego. She hated it, so much. Why did the fucker have to be involved in her parents’ death?
The Handler blinked as she sat back in her chair. “Lila! Diego and Five?” She questioned incredulously, causing Lila’s eyes to widen as she realized that her mother had picked up on the other thing bothering her. Even though she remained silent, she hadn’t needed to give her mother an answer for the older woman to know the answer to her question already. “Oh honey, how in the world did you end up falling down that rabbit hole, he looks like a kid right now?” She asked in awe and shock. Though there was a hint of something else coloring her mother’s expression and she wasn’t sure if her mother was angry with her or angry with Five.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” Lila snapped, unwilling to discuss the topic further. She wasn’t ready to give more of her emotions away. If her mother figured out just how complicated and deep her feelings toward Five were proving to be, it would only gut her more. She fucked her parents’ murderer and she felt so goddamn violated that all she could see was red. Her mind practically screamed out for bloody revenge. She needed to destroy him entirely if she were ever going to wash the taint away. “Besides it won’t matter when he’s dead!” She added hastily.
“Now you’re talking, sweetheart. I think it is about time we handle the whole damn lot of them. Five and his family need to go.” The Handler said with a sly smile, reaching out to place a comforting hand on Lila’s arm. “They have outlived their usefulness!” She added with a nod.
xXx
Finally Lila found herself face to face with Five again, the sneer stretched across her lips as he and Diego came out to the field to confront both her and her mother.
“And what do you want?” Five asked, looking between the two women.
“Your fucking head on a pike, you fucking piece of shit!” Lila snapped, causing Five to look at her in confusion. His confusion only served to piss her off further. He didn't get to play dumb.
“And what about me?” Diego asked, curiously clearly wondering where the vitriol for Five was coming from.
“You really aren’t worth my wrath.” Lila scoffed, irritated that Diego might have also known that Five had killed her parents. But she was fairly sure that Five hadn’t told him anything. Five was too enigmatic when it came to his Commission dealings, she had observed that first hand, despite what her mother had to say on the subject.
“What the hell are you even talking about?” Five snapped, cutting to the chase as always.
“Like you don’t fucking know already!” Lila snapped back.
“Enough with the lover’s quarrel, you two.” The Handler cut in with an eye roll and a dramatic sigh.
Instantly Lila glared at her mother, while Five looked like he had been punched in the stomach.
“What the fuck is she talking about?” Diego asked, glaring over at Five.
“Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you weren’t the only one my daughter was fooling around with it.” She told Diego with a bit of a smug smile. Just looking to drive that wedge between Five and one of his brothers. “Isn’t that right, Five? I guess it is poetic justice, since you have managed to fuck me over metaphorically quite a few times already. Why wouldn’t you just outright fuck, my daughter?”
“Are you kidding me right now?!” Five snapped at the Handler, even though he was unable to look Diego in the eye. Obviously he could see what a fucking mess was unfolding in front of him.
“I knew you two were acting funny and you both told me I was imagining things!” Diego said accusingly, looking between Five and Lila.
“Oh fuck off with the indignation Diego! I tried to save your sorry ass, but you fucking bailed on me the first chance you got. So spare me your bullshit, cause I don’t fucking care! Your asshole brother is going to die today, so it is pretty damn irrelevant whether or not I fucked him!” She shot back.
“She does have a point. Actually you all are going to die today as I’ve decided to execute the ones responsible for the assassination of the board of directors.” The Handler announced, causing Five to tense and Diego to look at her in confusion.
“We didn’t kill the board of directors...”
“Uh...that’s not entirely true.” Five spoke up.
“You didn’t tell them?” The Handler questioned as she was met with only a grimace and resounding silence from Five. “Oh Five.” She added with a shake of her head.
“I can’t believe you killed the board of directors, Five! The Commission is a complete shit show right now!” Diego said, more than willing to put the Lila thing aside for the moment.
“I did what I had to get our family home, but someone reneged on our deal.”
“It is not my fault that someone couldn’t meet a simple deadline.”
“You set me up to fail.” Five said accusingly.
“You set your own self set up, friend, but that is the story of your sad little life.” The Handler retorted.
“Oh please, mum. You always intended for Five and his merry band of rejects to take the fall for the board’s death.” Lila scoffed, so goddamn tired of the games. “1963 or 2019, they were all going to get executed regardless!”
It was the Handler’s turn to glare at her daughter. “Whatever! It’s time for the Hargreeves to go!” She said, snapping her fingers that signaled for all the Commission’s field agents to appear behind her, awaiting the attack order.
Five and Diego’s eyes widened as they took a couple of involuntary steps back, before they made a run for it.
xXx
Lila watched the mayhem unfold with a shake of her head. It was entirely pointless as only she really stood a chance against the Hargreeves. Today was the day that she really flexed her powers that she had been holding back the entire time. So when the agents were inevitably taken out by Five’s most volatile sibling, the originator of the Apocalypse, Lila knew it was her turn to step up to the plate to bat.
In the span of minutes, she alone turned the tide, taking out Five’s siblings with ease. Until it was just her and Five. All their other fights she had to hold back in order to not tip her hand to him. But now? She didn’t have to hold back her powers and she damn sure wasn’t going to hold back her rage. He murdered her parents and she was going to make him suffer for it. Five was good, but she was going to prove once and for all that she was better. When she finally got the upper hand in the barn, she struggled to crush his windpipe as he desperately fought against the weight of her foot. He managed to throw her off but she was quick to get back to her feet.
“Let’s just fucking end this.” Five panted, taking his fighting stance.
“You think I would give you the relief of a quick death?” She sneered.
“Oh cut the woman scorned bullshit. I didn’t do anything you weren’t on board with.” He snapped, making her feel gutted and sullied all over again.
“Let me spell it out for you. Do you remember 1993, London, Ronnie and Anita Gill?” She asked, pulling out one of Diego’s knives that she had lifted off of him earlier.
Five looked at her confused, before his eyes suddenly widened in realization. “The flower merchants...they were your parents?” He gasped out, a look of remorse surfacing in his eyes.
“They never hurt anyone, they didn’t deserve to be hogtied and shot down like animals.” Lila said, her voice seething with anger. Her pain and despair surfacing in her eyes.
“Okay yeah, I did kill your parents, but I was just following orders. It wasn’t personal! If you want to be mad at someone, be mad at the Handler. She’s the one who faked the kill order. At the time, I didn’t know why she did it, but now it all makes sense. It wasn’t about them, it was about you!” He told her frankly.
Lila could feel the breath be forcibly pushed from her body as the truth of his words hit her like a ton of bricks. Was there seriously no one she could fucking trust? A part of her wanted to deny his words, but she could feel it in her bones. Her mother had never answered her question of whether she knew or not what Five and AJ had done. Now she knew why that had been. All these revelations were too much. She hated Five for killing her parents, for torturing them before he did so, but then the Handler was just looking to steal her away and use her for her own personal gain.
“Son of a bitch!” Lila snapped, unable to hold back her tears, she quickly blinked away, her mind racing as she reappeared behind her mother in a flash of blue light. Her mother who was speaking to the young boy the Hargreeves were trying to protect. So this wasn’t about punishing the Hargreeves, she just wanted another pawn. “Looking for my replacement?” Lila asked as the Handler spun around in surprise.
“Lila, I thought you were handling Five. Did you get the job done already?”
“Five told me, you knew. He told me you faked that kill order.” Lila said in a low voice.
“And you believe him?” The Handler asked as she tried to subtly reach for the machine gun she had placed to the side when she started talking to the boy. However Lila caught on quickly as she called upon Diego’s powers and flung the blade in her hand at the Handler’s shoulder. The knife found its mark as it embedded itself in the Handler’s shoulder stopping her from reaching the gun.
“Five withholds the truth, he doesn’t outright lie.” Lila stated as she blinked over to the Handler and grabbed the gun off the bale of hay. “You on the other hand, do nothing but lie.” She added with a snarl as she roughly grabbed the Handler by her injured arm and blinked them both up to the main floor of the barn as Five and his siblings were all assembling together.
“Lila, are you really going to kill me? After everything I’ve done for you?” The Handler asked, clutching her injured shoulder, while giving Lila her most pathetic and sorrowful gaze. However Lila could see through the bullshit act. She's seen it too many times before not to see it for what it was, another attempt at manipulating her.
“That boy you are protecting is about to explode. If you are going to help him, I suggest you do it now.” Lila told Five’s sister, while keeping her eyes on the Handler.
Immediately Vanya ran down to the lower level followed by most of her siblings. Only Five and Diego stayed above to keep an eye on her and the Handler.
“Did you ever actually love me or was I just another tool?” Lila asked, the sick feeling in her stomach ever present as she held the gun on her mother. As much as she wanted to pull the trigger, she couldn’t keep the tremor out of her hand. The Handler had raised her, even if she were using her the entire time.
Though before the Handler could answer the question, the remaining Swede appeared through the barn door and shot the Handler three times in the chest, effectively killing her for good this time. Instinctively Lila snapped the gun toward the Swede as they locked gazes.
“Enough! The cycle has got to end!” Five shouted, grabbing both their attention. “We all got played here! We don’t have to keep trying to kill each other when the root of all our problems is now dead. Please just let it go.”
Lila could still feel the tears spilling from her eyes, even as she kept her gaze on the Swede. He seemed to pick up on her pain as he lowered his gun first. Finally they both tossed their guns aside as he turned to leave without a word. Lila simply sighed, while she kept her eyes on the door.
“I can’t forgive you, Five for your part in my parents’ murder. But I’m done trying to kill you.” She said in a low voice as she headed toward the barn door to leave too, but Diego caught her arm.
“Lila, like it or not, you’re one of us. It’s not a coincidence that you have powers. Our father always told us that we were the only ones who survived when those forty three women around the world gave birth on October first, 1989. Obviously he lied. Just like your mother. We can be your family.” He said softly and sincerely, despite the hurt he must have still been feeling over finding out about her and Five, he still cared about her, she could see it.
She could only offer up a weak smile as she lightly touched Diego’s face. “Thanks for the offer, but I need some time to myself.” She said as she slowly took off the beaded bracelet that she had been wearing since the mental hospital and placed it in the palm of his hand. “You’re a good guy, Diego. You shouldn’t get mixed up with the likes of me.” She added, before glancing over to Five. Truly he looked apologetic and deeply remorseful, but she wasn’t sure if she could ever get past the fact that he had been the triggerman the night her parents were murdered. Suddenly she blinked away out into the field with all the fallen agents, one of the briefcases had to still be working.
A few minutes later, Five appeared out in the field a short distance away from her. “Lila.” He said simply.
Instinctively her back stiffened as she glanced over her shoulder at him. “What is it, Five?” She asked, trying to push down on the flood of emotions threatening to overwhelm her.
“I just need to know that you aren’t going to do anything foolish.” He said cautiously.
Lila scoffed. “What? Worried I’ll try to change the timeline like you’ve been trying to do?” She asked with a mirthless laugh.
“The thought did cross my mind.” He admitted with a worried expression.
It was as she stood there looking at her nemesis and former lover that it truly hit her, just how much alike they were as they had both been pawns of the Handler for who knows how long. Time was muddled and unclear for them both. Truly they were two sides of the same coin and maybe in another timeline, they could have actually had something.
“I was actually beginning to like your sorry ass. So all of this has been like a knife to the gut. I really wish we had never crossed paths.” Lila said as she started to walk away, but Five caught her wrist to stop her from leaving.
“I never would have let things escalate between us, if I had known that those merchants were your parents. I’m generally an asshole, but I’m not fucking heartless. For whatever it is worth, I’m sorry that your parents were among the people I killed with no regard. I only ever wanted a chance to get my family back. I had to shut out all other emotions to keep my resolve. I always just told myself that if I didn’t carry out the kill order, someone else would. That is the excuse I used every time I was assigned a target, but know this. While I took pride in my work, I never really enjoyed it. I hate that I have so much blood on my hands. All the things I have done to survive is going to haunt me until the day I die.” He confessed, his voice raw with the emotions he rarely allowed to surface.
She inhaled sharply, while she gazed at him with something close to understanding. Without even thinking, she gripped his wrist back. “Go back to your family, Five.” She replied, gently. “I’ll be around, if you guys need help saving the world again.” She added with a small smile before she pulled away and snatched up one of the working briefcases. She didn’t wait for him to say anything else as she quickly vanished away. She had no idea where she was going or what she was going to do next, but she was also a survivor. So she was certain that she would figure it out.