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It was a normal day at the manor. Well, it was as normal as one could get when your family ran around in bird/bat themed costumes stopping crimes.
No one was currently trying to murder each other and no one had been murdered, so all was good. At least, Dick had thought that no one was trying to murder each other. He had held onto the nïave belief until he had accidentally glanced into the living room while trying to find Cass.
It looked like a normal day just wasn’t going to happen.
“I’m dead.” Dick whispered in disbelief.
“First of all, that’s impossible.”
Dick threw an exasperated look at his spying partner before turning back to the scene before them.
“Then I’ve been hit with some kind of toxin and I’m hallucinating.”
“My brain can come up with some weird things, but this isn’t one of them.”
“Alternate dimension?”
Steph scrunched her nose at the thought.
“I really hope not. Maybe Bruce did something?”
“Damian can be petty, but Steph, a Kent?”
They both contemplated how bad Bruce would have to fucked up to land Damian playing nice with Clark Kent’s son.
“I tripped over both Titus and Jerry this morning. There was also fresh milk in the fridge.”
“I took him to visit Goliath two days ago, and Alfred is clearly enjoying himself.
Alfred the cat’s purring seemed to reverberate throughout the entire room.
Dick and Steph looked on with wide eyes and fear in their hearts.
“Not Bruce.”
“Fucking shit!” Steph hissed as she clutched her chest, “We need to put a bell on you, I swear to God!”
Cass just shrugged and held out a newspaper. The Daily Planet to be exact.
Dick grabbed it and scanned over any articles that even mentioned Damian. He was snickering when he handed the paper off to Steph. She pinched her mouth shut with her teeth after she was done with Clark Kent’s latest article.
“So…” Steph took a deep breath to keep herself quiet, ”Kent decided to imply that Damian can’t make friends and Damian decided that the best way to take revenge is to befriend Kent’s son?”
At Cass’s nod and slight smile, Dick’s snickers had become the silent quaking of his shoulders as suppressed laughter threatened to make itself known. Steph glanced back into the room.
Only to see the young Kent staring right at her.
“Guys,” she whispered, after sipping back around the corner so fast the Flash would be jealous, “I think he heard us.”
Cass and Dick quickly sobered. Dick grabbed the girls hands and started sprinting down the hall, dragging them out of the manor and into his car. Would Blüdhaven be far enough to escape the ears of the son of a super so they could laugh in peace? Probably not, but they would live in their denial until it came to bite them in the ass later.
—||—
“Your family is weird.”
“Tt, I’ve been told that ‘you’ll get used to it’.”
“That doesn’t make it any less true Damian.”
“How did you get up there?”