Chapter Text
Gesturing for Hayden to enter the room, Theo told him to sit down. He locked the door behind them, knowing that something would go wrong if he left it unlocked. Either someone would come in at a completely inopportune moment, or maybe Hayden would jump ship if he got too anxious. Theo knew that locking someone in a room to make them talk about their problems was probably against many rules of counselling or whatever, but what did he know? He wasn’t a professional. He was just someone who cared for his friend and he could only help Hayden out if he knew what was wrong.
Theo attempted to calm his racing heart. He took a deep breath. “Now, Hayd . I know you don’t really want to do this, but I really want to hear what happened after I left you yesterday and also what you’re feeling at the moment. Do you think you can do that for me?” Theo made sure to try and keep an even and soothing tone. It was almost like he was talking to a cornered puppy, but he guessed it was the right approach when Hayden didn’t react negatively and, instead, turned to face him with his anxious and apprehensive gaze.
No matter what other people may have said, Theo knew he wasn’t stupid. He could be reckless, even brash at times, and he might have a habit of blurting out things at the worst moment but, over the years, he had learnt a lot of the quirks and cues people have in conversations and he was happy with his skill in picking out the subtler things people try to get across in conversations without them having to outwardly say them.
For example, just from the distraught look that Hayden had sent him when Christophe joined them for breakfast, he could tell that Hayden didn’t want any mention of the deep, meaningful conversation they were due to have so, instead, he had decided to bring up their journey back. It was the only topic he could think of where both of the people opposite him would have something to talk about. However, this was clearly the wrong decision as Hayden’s already pale face had gone almost ashen. Clearly, something had happened in Christophe’s presence that Hayden didn’t want mentioning. It hadn’t been too challenging to figure out, considering Hayden had immediately switched his pleading look to Chris instead of Theo and, really, no matter how subtle Hayden had thought he was being, it was ridiculously obvious. It would have been more subtle to start waving a flag with the words “DON’T TALK ABOUT THE THING” written on it, while he screamed out the exact same phrasing, but Theo had decided to let it slide. The canteen was definitely not the place for anything deep, especially with other people around.
This thought brought Theo to his current predicament: Hayden’s lack of response to his question. It was like he was trying to speak but just couldn’t. It was either that he had so much to say that he didn’t know where to start, or maybe he just couldn’t get his voice to work. Theo assumed it was a combination of both. How could he start to coax out information? He could wait until Hayden broke (which sounded a bit too much like torture, so maybe not)? Ask smaller questions? Try and guess from what he had gathered so far? He really wasn’t sure.
Theo shook himself out of his thoughts and came straight back into the awkward silence the room had settled into. Taking one look at Hayden, Theo made a decision: smaller questions it would be.
“Okay, so clearly you aren’t, like, super comfortable talking about it, right?” He waited for the confirmative nod. “Cool, cool. Just checking that! Would you rather we break it down and go in stages? Maybe yes or no questions that turn into other questions if I need clarification?”
Theo could almost hear Hayden running through the questions in his mind. “Yeah, that sounds good.” Theo could see the start of tears appearing in Hayden’s eyes but he chose to tactfully ignore it. Commenting on that would do Hayden no good right now and, if he did start to fully ball, he’d just have to calm him down and give him a consoling hug!
Theo forced his face to light up in thanks. “Awesome! Cool! So, the first thingy I want to check is: are you injured in any way? ‘Cause , like, if you are, then that needs to be sorted before anything else?”
When Hayden didn’t immediately respond, Theo started to worry. Shouldn’t you know if you’re injured? Fortunately, Hayden shook his head after a few moments. “Are you sure? You seemed a little hesitant there.” Theo attempted to infuse a little bit of humour into his voice, but it came out quite forced.
Hayden responded with a decisive nod.
Theo sighed with relief. “Great! Okay, so…” He paused. Where to start? “Okay. So, I guess we start at the beginning and go from there?” Theo received a short nod. It was good that Hayden was responding so readily. It made his life a lot easier.
“So, obviously, I assume it all started after we got chased by those ADVENT losers, right?” A nod. “Okay, so since I know that two of them were chasing me, then only one went after you?” Another nod. “Hmm. So did you lose the guy?”
There was a pause before Hayden scrunched up his nose and gave a so-so kind of tilt with his head.
“You sort of lost him?” Theo checked.
Hayden nodded.
Theo was confused. How can you sort of lose someone?
“Okay. So, I assume he followed for you a bit and then you lost him.” A nod. “And then he found you again?” A shake. “Um, someone else found you?” A nod. “Hmm. Okay.”
It seemed that the yes or no questions had helped Hayden calm down a bit, as he looked a little bit more put-together than he was before they had started. The issue was that Theo didn’t know how he could ask yes or no questions about what happened there, so Hayden would have to speak… Theo really hoped it wouldn’t affect Hayden too much.
“Okay, Hayd . I think here you’re gonna have to speak ‘cause I won’t be able to yes or no it for this bit. Do you think you’ll be okay with that?” Hayden paused and, extremely hesitantly, nodded his confirmation. “So, what happened when the other person found you?”
Hayden took a very noticeable deep breath before beginning to speak. “So, I was running and turned a corner and rammed straight into something. I fell on the floor and, when I looked up, it was into the smirking f-face of a S-s-stun L-l-l-lancer.” Hayden paused for a couple of seconds. Theo assumed it was to try and compose himself as it seemed like he was struggling. “Then h-he must’ve s-stunned me as I b-blacked out. Then I w-w-woke up in an i - i - i -interrogation room. It w-w-w-was…” Hayden’s voice petered out as he started to tear up.
“Hey. It’s fine.” Theo wrapped his arm around Hayden and started to rub circles into Hayden’s back in the hope he’d calm down. It didn’t help Hayden stop crying as he started to bawl, his body racking with sobs. “It’s fine, just let it all out, don’t worry about it. Remember, it’s perfectly fine to cry! It’s good to just let it go! Anyway, just let it out for a bit and we can continue.”
Theo wasn’t really sure how long Hayden continued to cry for but, eventually, the crying ceased and Theo felt it was enough to continue with the questioning.
“ Hayd , do you think you’re okay to nod and shake your head at some more questions? I think I can probably just ask those for a little bit longer, just so you can maybe get your head together again. That okay?”
Theo received a semi-confident nod in response, so he felt slightly accomplished with his achievement.
“So, you got captured, put in an interrogation room and then somehow made it back here super quickly.” Theo hummed to himself, thinking about the best questions to ask. “So, you obviously escaped, otherwise you wouldn’t be here. Did you escape by yourself?” Hayden shook his head. “Ah, okay. You had some help. Makes sense.” Theo hummed again. “Did you see the person who helped you escape?” There was a confident nod in response. Hayden must’ve seen the person quite clearly to elicit such a confident nod. “I assume it was someone you know?” Hayden shook his head again. “It wasn’t someone you know? That’s weird… I don’t remember anything being said about prisoners going free from that area and it would’ve been mentioned in the report I got given before our meet-up…” Theo knew what he was saying wouldn’t be particularly useful for Hayden, but it was just easier to say his thought process out loud; not only to help him sort out his ideas but also to show Hayden his thought process, so he wouldn’t be surprised if the questions randomly jumped into a tangent. There was a small niggle at the back of Theo’s brain that he was missing something both obvious and extremely irritating but he ignored it for the moment.
His verbal thought-sorting was interrupted by Hayden. “He said that he helped me escape because he helped you escape.” Hayden sounded a lot better, and he was less teary, which was definitely an improvement, but his voice still sounded quite thick. “He was just really confusing, cause h-he, like, i - i -interrogated m-me and then was like just like now I’m going to let you go. I was so confused.”
Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. Theo really did not like where this was going. The niggle in the back of his brain was right. If this was going where he assumed it was, the answer was obvious and extremely annoying. Theo just hoped he wasn’t correct.
Theo did notice Hayden’s slight stuttering on the actual mention of the interrogation but, otherwise, he had seemed pretty in control of his voice. “Well, great. I think I know what’s gone on here, but I just need to check. The guy that helped you escape was an ADVENT Officer, right? And he had a super recognisable voice? Did you catch the guy’s name?”
Theo almost laughed at the shock showing on Hayden’s face. “Y-yeah, it was. How did you know?” There was a pause. “I don’t remember him telling me a name, still, I could have just missed it... but that’s not important! How did you know who it was? Wait! When he said he helped you escape, did he mean it literally as well? I assumed it was more like he directed people away from you or something ‘cause , like, Christophe said you were fine when we were travelling back. He said you were fine, so what happened?”
At least Hayden was distracted enough to start rambling and he seemed nowhere near approaching another breakdown. Hayden was always like this. If someone else had a problem, he’d be there instantly to try and solve it. But Theo wanted Hayden to be calm, so was Hayden panicking about him actually a good thing? At the moment, not particularly.
“Yeah, I met up with him twice, actually. Before our meeting and directly after. He was in the alley I hid in just after I left you. He let me go pretty much immediately but it was just a very confusing situation… I still don’t trust him but helping you definitely gives him some brownie points…”
A contemplative silence stretched over the room.
Suddenly realising they hadn’t finished the story retelling, Theo snapped himself back to the room while preventing himself from physically jolting. He didn’t want to make Hayden jump and set him off again.
Making sure to speak relatively quietly, to try and maintain the calm atmosphere, Theo asked, “Anyway, Hayd , do you think you can keep going, or do you want to go back to the yes or no questions?” There was a pause. It seemed to stretch on forever. It was long enough that Theo started to get concerned and was almost about to continue speaking when Hayden gave a short nod. It seemed almost reluctant. “Are you sure? You don’t have to push yourself just to prove yourself to me if you don’t want to!”
Hearing that comment, Hayden seemed to shrink in on himself for a couple of seconds before uncurling himself and looking directly at Theo with determination. Theo could tell it was definitely forced, but he was happy that Hayden wasn’t moping . “No. It’s fine. I can do it, Theo. I’m not weak.”
“I never said you were,” Theo said, trying to keep all the confusion out of his voice. Upon seeing a flash of pure terror across Hayden’s face, Theo decided to quickly move on, but he made a mental note to bring it up later. “But, anyway, that’s awesome to hear! So, what happened after he said he’d let you go?”
Theo saw Hayden’s body relax at the return to the previous conversation. “Well, yeah, so they let me go after placing some trackers on me, which the Officer told me about. I was escorted out by two random grunts and then just left outside the building. I made my way to one of the underground entrances. It was semi-well-known so if they did follow me then I wouldn’t be revealing any secrets. I changed clothes, then eventually made my way back to my second flat. Ever since you recommended I get a secondary place for storage and hiding, I rented out a super cheap apartment in the slummy area, just for my stuff.” Most people didn’t normally listen to Theo’s advice since he was quite young, so to hear that Hayden appreciated it made Theo very happy. “Anyway, I had a spare comms device that I snagged when there were some going free. I didn’t know who it contacted, but I knew it was someone, so I just spoke into it asking for help. It was just super lucky that it was the Commander who answered.” At this, Theo’s brain almost shut down in surprise. Hayden must’ve seen the shock on his face and misinterpreted it as thinking it was caused by Hayden’s lucky break. “Yeah, she said she’d send someone to pick me up and–”
“Wait a second! Was it before or after I got back that you spoke to the Commander?” Theo already knew the answer. There was only one possible way that fit with all the timings; he just didn’t want to admit it to himself.
“Umm… I’m pretty sure it was before you got back but I assume only by a bit.” There was a short pause. “Yeah. It was definitely before you got back. I’m not certain on the timings though. Why? Is it important?”
Theo just about stopped himself from exploding with rage. He couldn’t afford to get angry right now. Not with the chance it would set Hayden off. “It is important because she didn’t tell me!” Theo was failing to keep his anger his check and his volume had started to increase. “First, she lied to my face. I asked how you were and she said you were fine. This was either when you were being chased or when you’d been captured, which means she definitely lied to me. Like, that’s just not right! And then, she didn’t even think to mention it during our debrief! She knows we’re friends and that I care about you, and she didn’t mention it! And, thinking about it, she one hundred percent kept it from me purposefully, since there were things she said that sounded like she was trying to keep information from me; and they were related to this. How can I trust a leader who lies to me?” By this point, Theo knew he was almost shouting but he couldn’t stop himself.
He glanced over at Hayden and saw that he was looking at Theo in a way that was almost fearful. Normally, Hayden would be okay with Theo’s rage, being used to it and all, but due to Hayden’s emotional state, this probably wasn’t the time.
Theo winced to himself as all the anger and tension left his body. “Damn it,” he whispered. “Sorry Hayd . I didn’t mean to get so angry, it’s just really frustrating! I hope you know that I wasn't angry with you! Not one bit, okay!” Hayden gave a tentative nod. Theo gave an audible sigh of relief. “Okay, good. Anyway, I assume that then Chris picked you up, and then that’s us up-to-date?” Theo received a nod that lacked its previous confidence, but it contained enough movement for Theo to recognise that Hayden wasn’t too out-of-sorts as a result of his outburst.
Time to destroy all of that confidence in one fell swoop.
“Anyway, Hayd, I know that you don’t want to talk about this part,” Theo began, watching as Hayden’s face instantly paled, “but we really do need to discuss it. I just think it’ll be better in the long run if we talk about why you reacted so negatively to, like, just the whole conversation.”