Chapter 1: Press X to Feed Starscream
Summary:
In which readers of the Rogue Seeker RP Blog, pressed X to Feed Starscream babies.
Notes:
Do not read this if cannibalistic baby eating isn't your thing.
Chapter Text
Crossposted from fic and rp blog.
*whacks that X button* amuse me, I'm sleep deprived and haven't yet had my morning coffee
Asked by silvertonguedaggermaw
(This has a recording of Starscream by Max of TF: Rise Up!: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aYpSIEC826l2mRtDdg-3ORz-tRXFfJlS/view?usp=sharing)
“With pleasure.” Starscream smirks at the message from Silvermaw, one of Soundwave’s adopted humans, now an uploaded mind inhabiting various drone bodies.
There’s a few down dethawed insecticon grubs writhing around in the bowl in front of khyr.
Kha decides to open up the Sparkling Livestream channel. Instead of cute seeker babies, this time around….its just shrieking and panicking insecticon grubs. They try to wriggle out of the bowl
Starscream grins at the camera.
“Hello to my audience, you’re here for a very special treat. It’s rare you get to see the Cybertronian ecosystem in action, with the loss of our home planet and the devastation of its ecosystem.” Starscream sounds sad as kha says this, and then kha sounds jubiliant.
"Luckily for us, my titan-ship and home, the Nemesis was retrofitted into a colony ship and it can spawn all manner of life forms to recreate our lost homeland.
This before me, is the larval stage of wild insecticons. Yes, I had my ship spawn these, little shits just for this. Of course, many of you are descended from humans who suffered underneath their cruel claws. And to you my dear human watchers, I dedicate this stream to you.
A mukbang episode of Sparkling Livestream!”
Starscream spears a screaming grub as khyr face-plates split open into an endless abyss of grinding wheels, spinning fangs, and sharp pincing mandibles.
i press X and reccommend turning the unfortunate grub into a burrito
Asked by sleeveev
“Hello viewers, on this episode of Sparkling Livestream: I shall be consuming these delicious grubs in burritos!!!”
On screen, Starscream is shown chopping rubber, and crushing diamond, along with shaving metals. Grubs whimper in a cage on the counter.
They are then pulled out.
The insecticon grubs all scream as Screamer magnetizes them, soaks them in red energon, and then rolls them in metal shavings as a form of pseudo-lettuce. Finely chopped rubber gets sprinkled on top of them along with a smattering of crushed diamond.
The grubs wail as Lord Doctor Doctor Starscream then swaddles them in rubber mats. They look very cute and then Starscream splits khyr face open for the eating.
Yaki udon noodles with a side of sparkling
Asked by Anonymous
On screen, Starscream is shown cooking in the kitchens of the Nemesis. Steelsilk is being rolled up into noodle shapes and then boiled in a pot of heated energon.
Grubs scream in their crate as Starscream smiles on camera, as kha hones khyr claws on the kitchen scratching post.
Several thick wire-tree branches are pulled out of storage and then sliced with Screamer’s finely honed talons.
The Frumbles, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw , Squawktalk, Howlback, Wingthing, and Sundor watch hungrily. With zoomed in optics, all their maws are open with flared out mandibles as they drool out lubricant for their grinding wheels and saws.
“Hello viewers, today on this episode of Sparkling Livestream, I shall be making a cybertronian version of Yaki Udon noodles, with a side of grub. As you can see, my creations are very hungry….”
The episode proceeds with Screamer pulling out a very large pan, along with Earth oil. Kha twists the neck of the grubs, slices them up and then stir-frys the grub slices with the wire-tree. There’s some pleased noises as kha samples the offlined grubs during the cooking.
The noodles are then dumped in along with red energon sauce.
Starscream intends on overclocking Soundwave’s brood and then dumping the batch of hellions on zir.
X! Insecticon Satay, let's feed the Screamer!
Asked by artsy-hobbitses
“SCREE, SCREE, ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS SENT IN A REQUEST FOR ANOTHER GRUB MUKBANG EPISODE!!!” TC’s optics are wild with fan-glee, for Artsy-Hobbitses is known for their intense humanformer AU. Granted, its often pro-autobot, but its fanfic so who cares?
Starscream smirks and then looks at the request.
“Hello, and thank you for the request. This special episode is dedicated to Oni, and her Ties That Bind RPF AU. While I find her autobot art distasteful, I do enjoy her humanized versions of me. Quite lovely.”
—
On screen, offlined grubs are stuck onto skewers and then grilled on a giant barbeque pit outside in the NEST base. NEST peacekeepers mill around and grill and bbq their own food.
They watch Starscream’s grilling with a mixture of amusement, disgust, and bafflement. None are going to pick a fight with the 63-feet tall roosterhen asshole jet over khyr tastes in cuisine.
Starscream smiles to khyrself and hums an ancient Vosian cooking song as kha slathers the roasted grubs with energon sauce, said energon sauce is mixed with all manners of additives, bismuth, crushed diamond, rubies, and then mixed with a lovely swirl of mercury.
Skywarp and TC loaf and lounge around in the background as their various creations climb and slide down their plating.
The livestream zooms in as everyone chows down.
LISTEN RS STARSCREAM CAN CALLOUT POST ME ANY DAY FOR BEING PRO AUTOBOT SHDHDJJFFFF clearly I’ll just have to make it up to him by drawing more human pinups of him :’B
Also y’all go check out RS Screamer’s sparkling mukbang if you’re into some dark comedy 😂
Starscream smirks at the reblog and fawns at the attention. “Just a friendly reminder, my pronouns are kha/khyr. And of course, all your humanformer Starscream art is hung up in my aerie on the walls.”
Khyr face darkens. “Even the windscream art. As personally abominable as I find it, the art quality is too good and flattering for me to not include.”
On screen, Starscream drops in a promo link to Oni’s RPF and commission info - https://tiesthatbind-tf.tumblr.com/
And a link to all the sparkling mukbhang episodes - https://voidwingsprime.tumblr.com/tagged/grub%20mukbang%20episode
Starscream slurps up another grub and then flashes biolights and does wingspeak as kha speaks to Oni on camera non-verbally due to khyr maw currently being full of tasty baby.
There’s subtitles: “When the next installment of reparations funding comes in from the UN, expect some commissions.”
Have you ever heard of minestrone soup? Maybe that's one to try out
On stream, there’s a boiling pot of heated energon, offlined grubs, along with chopped up rubber tires, sliced up wire trees and solar panels.
Starscream can be seen on camera tapping at khyr work station in the background as kha works on organizing khyr notes on the human reaction to grub eating.
The chat is currently having a debate on the xenoethics on eating babies.
XXXXXXX
After the meals of grub satay, grub udon, grub soup, grub burritos, and the strange sparklings from other timelines, Starscream is full.
Kha is currently recharging inside of Thundercracker and tangled up in a sleepy pile with Skywarp and the rest of their creations.
Their data dreams are full of satisfying remixes on how they all tasted. Consuming nothing but energon and scrap metal gets tiring.
Chapter 2: Lennox: Xeno-Ethics
Summary:
In which Lennox answers some questions on what humans think of the baby eating.
Notes:
Autobots fucked over humanity a few centuries prior to Rogue Seeker, and now some humans are partially cyberized due to Earth being partially cyberized ecosystems.
Chapter Text
Cross-posted to Fic Blog and RP Blog.
Artwork done by https://artsy-hobbitses.tumblr.com/post/652192601529810944/commission-for-rogue-seeker-for-his-version-of
---
[ID: Screenshot of messages from tumblr.
Lennox, you got any thoughts on....whatever Screamer's doing with these grubbies? -Sleeveev
Hey, Lennox, how's the grub party? -Silvertongueddaggermaw.]
Lennox inhales when he sees these asks and exhales. Oy vey. He steeples his fingers and figures out how to word his thoughts. Ah fuck it, it’s not like the asshole jets can sue him or eat him for disapproving.
That’s the beauty of being made of meat, they can’t digest him.
Also for some fucking reason, they find him cute and adorable.
“It’s….a very thorny issue.
The xenoethicists at NEST and other places been getting into debates over this.
While we aren’t much to judge to other culture’s cuisine…we’ve long moved past the racist bullshit of the 20th and 21st centuries….there’s a difference between regular human food and consuming sapient babies.”
Lennox is now rubbing his head. Passover is coming up, he doesn’t want to discuss this. He’s read about blood libel and how his ancestors been persecuted because of it. Why did the fucking asshole bird had to start getting hungry around this time of all times?!!
“I find it…disgusting. Personally.
I hate insecticons like any other red-blooded human. The fucking assholes came in, pretended to be friends to human kind, and then started uploading us for forced uplift into cybertronian frames.
Nearly drove out us extinct. It’s why a lot of us NEST peacekeepers aren’t messing with Screamer for it.”
Lennox rubs his ears on camera. Unlike the rest of him that’s flesh and blood, its electro-flesh. Circuits run through the grey metal.
He sips at some watered down energon and his eyes glow a neon blue as he looks back at the webcam.
“I still feel sorry for the little shits though. The Nemesis has been producing the poor things without sapience drives. So they aren’t self-aware like are….in traditional cuisine.”
Will makes a disgusted noise and looks straight at the camera.
“Did you know that xenomecha are self-aware and intelligent from day one, even as children? Saw it myself when Skywarp, Thundercracker and Soundwave brought Squawktalk and Howlback online. Same when Wingthing and Sundor first hatched.”
Lennox chugs the energon down.
“Christ, I have a daughter, the thought of someone consuming her…”
He shakes his head.
“The xeno and bio-ethicists ruled that the grubs can’t be sapient. That it’s too be tolerated since …”
He rubs his face.
“…its important for them to preserve their culture.”
He rolls his shoulders back.
“Some of the xenobiologists think we should be reviving the insecticons, as a form of apology since we drove them to extinction, centuries ago. They’ve been shouted down. No one wants to risk another near-human extinction. And the Seekers don’t want another redo of their war.”
He groans.
“Turns out the asshole jets have said there might be more out there. More fucking Autobots among the stars!!”
Lennox crushes his can of empty energon and flings it at the wall.
“So my team seeing those poor shits get eaten up lifts their morale even if they find it disgusting like I do, or find it hilarious like Epps does. That if the bugs ever come back, we have a weapon against them, their natural predators. Just like what Gd intended. The circle of life.”
Lennox sounds bitter and strained.
“Better to keep the roosterhens happy they say. And we don’t twig them as food and since they’re endangered, we need to help them increase their numbers too.”
He gives a strained smile at the camera.
“Churro and the other appliance mecha are in Florida right now, on vacation. They don’t need to be seeing this shit. Or having their eggs turned into food. “
He puts his head in his hands. “The bio and xeno ethicists are fucking hypocrites. The appliance mecha are bugs too, and we’re helping them reproduce. I don’t want to see their full-grown autobot cousins come back…but it feels hypocritical not to bring them back from extinction either. Especially when that cursed ship can bring back any Cybertronian breed.”
Will takes out his dagger, the one made from Soundwave’s old fang, and stabs open another energon can to drink.
“Soundwave, isn’t happy with it either. Said that the insecticons tried to domesticate Seekers and thats why their war started. Still insists there’s no honor in eating an enemy that can’t fight back. Finds the whole thing hypocritical and that Starscream isn’t much better then they were, since kha’s eating….domesticated grubs.”
Lennox studies his blade as it shines in the light. “Ze was extremely angry at the human ethics ruling. Said we should’ve banned it outright. I agree with zir, but hey I have don’t control over the ethics board.”
He sighs. “Hex and zir aren’t talking right now. I get to be the giant ranting board. Soundwave isn’t talking much with the rest of zir Coterie either.”
Will’s eyes glow again as he stares into the camera. “ You see what I have to fucking live with? “
Chapter 3: Bonus: Non-Canon Crossover Baby Eating
Summary:
In which some of Starscream's extra-dimensional readers send over more babies for khyr to eat. Non-canon crossover baby eating.
Chapter Text
Crossposted from fic and rp blog.
---
Care to rate and review a risenverse seekerlet? I'm pretty sure that Screamer and Warper won't care if they don't get it back. Also they're rather juicy just in case you have any need of some sort of fruit-substitute.
“I CAN’T EAT THIS!!” Starscream’s holding the grub at arm’s length with a disgusted look on khyr face. Ugh seeker grubs.
TC tried to let the disgusting thing into yres grub pit and all it did was chew on the insides of it. It couldn’t even hardwire on reflex like their timeline’s seeker grubs and deployers.
“Ugh, not only is it a seekerlet, its a stupid seekerlet. It can’t even talk or play minecraft from day one like a regular irritating grub.”
The RV Seekerlet is currently in a ballpit as it noms on the chewy rubber balls filled with liquid energon. There’s also a few victims in there. A few mecha raided from other war-torn universes have had their cables cut, and engines removed for safe-eating. Along with being lobotomized with removal of their brain modules.
A few trines have opted to adopt the stupid thing.
Starscream grumbles on screen.
“0/10 Energon Crystals. It’s idiotic and useless. It can’t even be used as back-up data storage like a regular seeker grub or deployer. All it does is needlessly eat like some kind of organic infant. Ugh, at least it doesn’t extrude effluvia like a human.”
---
i drop a small, polygonal helicopter in front of Starscream's feet. it immediately transforms, into a similarly polygonal humanoid. it's very small, and it resembles Turbulence from the continuity Rise of the Radiotrons. a small card is stuck to his fin, and says "it's gourmet". do what you wish, Starscream.
Starscream curses as kha tries to pick up the gross rusty sparkling. The thing’s sharp corners has sliced into khyr palm plating. Khyr face-plates have delicate mechanisms for khyr beautiful face-splitting maw and kha has no wish to risk khyr face.
Screamer grumbles as kha picks up the fleeing sparkling with a set of very very sturdy tongs. The same set of tongs used to pick khyr creations with Soundwave when they first hatched.
In the communal kitchen, Skywarp has set up a cooking station, filled with plates of metal shavings, powdered bismuth and iron, and nanite slurry
Kha ignores the squirming sparkling as Starscream dips the polygonal child into the nanite slurry, and then rolls him in the shavings and the crushed metals.
Starscream smirks as gasoline is poured into a pan for frying.
---
[ID: A baby seeker, with green neck trim and face vents and pale pink helm plating. Wrapped in a tortilla filled with rice and brown beans. The baby seeker is squishy like a baby seal.]
Crossposted to fic and rp blog.
Art by Silvertongueddaggermaw/decepticon-air-command.
---
Lunchtime, courtesy of the Risenverse command trine!
–
Starscream’s optics glint terribly and they shine red light on the adorable squeaking seekerlet before khyr.
Kha isn’t aware it’s a seeker, kha just thinks its another insecticon grub. After all, most seeker grubs have back-plating and have a firm metallic *squish to them*. This one feels like memory foam.
The critter squeaks and wriggles futiley as kha holds it up, and Starscream’s face-plates split open and a whirring flower of destruction awaits it.
Chapter 4: Churro: Not Food.
Summary:
In which Starscream finds an insecticon that kha can't devour.
Notes:
Churro is an OC and shows up in "Endangered Species: It's the Toaster's Fault."
Chapter Text
Original prompt here: https://rogue-seeker.tumblr.com/post/654239379279216640/if-you-still-accept-rs-churro-hiding-in-a-box
This is the revised edition.
On screen, is another episode of Sparkling Livestream: Grub Mukbang Edition.
But instead of Starscream devouring another hapless grub...
It's a toaster isopod inside of a box. A box on top of Soundwave's helm. Ze is perched on the communal kitchen, knees drawn up to zir chest. Zir claws are laced together and zir face-screen is just a smug blank void with amused pulses of zir bio-lights.
Churro, the toaster glared at Starscream with its azure optics. Starscream’s own optics narrowed into tiny little crimson beads, irised and zoomed in. Khyr face is slightly split open, khyr own maw blades slowly spinning, behind the sinister face-plates.
Starscream has hungry little thoughts inside of khyr helm.
Such a small little morsel…a decadent little snack. It's been so long that kha has tasted domesticated isopodwheel,though this little beast’s codeline has been retrofitted into toasters. Strange alt-modes meant to toast bread, a wheat-by product of human cuisine.
Churro's optics narrowed into little slits and it's little delicious looking leg wriggled on top of Soundwave's helm.
It broke Starscream’s hungry reverie.
“CHURRO: NOT FOOD!”
“CHURRO: KING!”
“KING: NOT FOOD!”
Churro reared up and threw a deflated soccer ball at Starscream.
Before Starscream could react, kha yelped as kha felt the floor yawn beneath khyr. Kha scrabbled and clawed for the floor but no avail.
The last thing, kha saw as a smug little toaster and Soundwave's displayed emoji of
:)
---
"Screamer, stop trying to eat the toaster."
Thundercracker facepalmed.
It was the umpteenth time this week that Soundwave had dumped yres trinemate into yres Aerie.
Chapter 5: Laserbeak Torments Starscream
Summary:
In which Laserbeak steals Starscream's grub dumplings.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Starscream scowls at the ask. Khyr lip plates twist and khyr red optics eye roll.
The ornery seeker is splooting, great wings displayed with glimmering and flashing holofeathers. A plate of squeaking rubbery dumplings sits before khyr. One dumpling whines sadly as a fork sticks out of it.
Khyr crown of holo feathers flattens in irritation.
“Today’s episode was on grub dumplings but someone had to interrupt.”
“HIIIIIIIIIIII.”
Laserbeak waves with a gleeful arm-wing. She’s perched on top of Starscream and her data cable reaches out and plucks a grub dumpling from the dish. She weftly weaves it in between Starscream’s attempts to claw it back.
The dumpling squeals.
Starscream screeches.
“Go bother someone else!”
“Nope! You’re my new favorite creator!!!”
The dumpling screams as it disappears down Laserbeak’s maw.
Laserbeak chirrs happily.
“YOU HAVE AN OLD DEPLOYER FRAME TO EAT!”
“You’re right!”
“NO, TAKE THAT GRUB DUMPLING BACK!”
Starscream tries to scrabble for more of the dumplings, but Laserbeak’s too fast for khyr.
Her data cables have snagged more of the squealing shrieking dumplings and she sandwiches them between old plating, torn from her old wing plating
“Where did you get that?!”
“See everyone! Dumpling deployer wing sandwiches!”
Laserbeak’s face screen flashes with ^w^ as she pats the sandwich.
The dumplings shriek in fear as they are squished.
Her maw opens up wide.
Notes:
If you read the links, you'll know that Laserbeak was once a deployer. Skywarp upgraded her to an sub adult frame, she's now eating the deployer frame, to ensure no one can force her to be a deployer again.
Chapter 6: Ramen and Dumpings
Summary:
In which Starscream shows the audience how to make grub dumplings. And where Seeker ramen comes from.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
(cross-posted to tumblr here and here)
Are you gonna teach us how to make squeaky dumplings?
“Of course, my dear viewers.”
On screen, Starscream is feeding some happy grubs. Kha is spooning gels of bright energon straight into their mouths as they all squeal happily. A few are munching on raw iron and titanium ores.
“Feed them your chosen filling. Energon jam with mineral flavorings, along with hard ores for that-” Starscream’s fangs lengthen. “-crunch.”
Kha then grabs soft arachnosilk. And then rolls and then swaddles them.
The peaceful chirps change into confused whimpers.
Starscream opens khyr face-plates….
----
Baby, but like, instant packaged ramen.
Asked by sgtransformersdork
Starscream smirks and pulls out packets.
“What do you think failed gestation pods are turned into? Those lifeless masses of nanites have to be used for something.”
Notes:
Yup, my Seekers eat their dead. Failed sparklings included. Feel free to send some more baby eating suggestions to my tumblr!
Chapter 7: Lasagné
Summary:
In which Starscream cooks Cybertronian Lasagné.
Chapter Text
Original post: https://voidwingsprime.tumblr.com/post/668542676403159040/what-about-lasagn%C3%A9#notes
What about lasagné?
On screen, there’s Starscream tucking insecticon grubs into a large metal pan. Khyr holographic feathers fan out in amused joy, as the grubs happilly squeak as they are covered in foil blankets.
Screamer cracks open an oil barrel and starts to drizzle the grubs in oil….
A couch is pulled out and the large Seeker chops up the furniture as filling.
Nearby is a very, very large oven. The dials are clearly set to “pre-heat”.
Take_it_to_the_Max on Chapter 1 Wed 23 Jun 2021 06:36AM UTC
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