Chapter Text
Hello, fellow MHA/BNHA fans! My name is Cole/C and I'm a really big Class 1-B enthusiast who's decided to take it upon themself to write a book on their personal fave UA students because... why the fuck not? First and foremost, these kids barely have any content on them screwing around and having fun so I've decided to fucking change that. Why? Because I'm not a coward and if Kirishima were to take one look at me, he would think I'm MANLY as fuck. Moving on, this work is basically just me fucking around with headcanons, concepts, etcetera. I'll mainly do stuff like headcanons and/or incorrect quotes so don't expect too much from me please.
Sidenote: English is NOT my first language so I apologize if you spot any grammatical and/or spelling errors in this book. If you spot one, please comment it down below so I can easily fix it. Thank you.
I don't really know where I'm going with this book so I'm just going to post a bunch of incorrect quotes I made:
Neito: Fuck you, Tetsutetsu-kun.
Tetsutetsu: No thanks, Monoma-kun, you're not manly enough.
Itsuka: Did you eat all the powdered donuts?
Shihai, through a mouth full of food: No.
Itsuka: Then what’s that on your pants?
Shihai: That’s cocaine.
Neito: Tonight we enact Operation Kill Bakugo.
Sen: Wasn’t that the name of our last plan?
Neito: Is the bitch dead?
Sen: No...
Neito: Then I’m not changing the fucking name.
Manga: I need to stop telling people to fight me. I’m four feet and seven inches tall. What am I going to do when someone actually does? Hide in a vent?
Hiryu: Are you sure this is a shortcut?
Setsuna: Not as sure as I was an hour ago.
Kinoko: My boyfriend doesn’t know I’m home so he’s singing loudly in the shower and it’s so cute.
Kinoko: He sucks. But it’s cute.
Reiko: Ugh. It's 2021. Why can't I delete friends in real life.
[later]
Reiko: Okay, turns out what I was thinking of is called murder.
Neito: I am such an idiot.
Yosetsu:
Neito:
Yosetsu: If you're waiting for me to disagree, it's gonna be a long night.
Juzo: 'Not ready' is a step up from 'no'.
Nirengeki: And a million steps down from 'maybe'.
Kosei: Hey. Which one of these shirts do you think I should wear tomorrow?
Sen: To where?
Kosei: Prison.
Yosetsu: Prison?
Hiryu: Oh, my God, what did you download?
Kosei: Nothing... Yeah, nothing... That's not why I'm going to prison!
Sen: So why are you going?
Kosei: I'm up for a job where I teach prisoners useful skills so when they get out they don't have to go back to a life of crime.
Yosetsu: Yeah, why would a dude rob a bank when he could just build a robot out of soda bottles?
Ibara: Tokage-san calls me "cute af!" which I assume means "and fun!"
Kinoko: Aww-
Itsuka: It doesn't.
Kinoko: Are you seriously asking me on a date beside this DEAD body?
Shihai: W- Well, yeah. I figured it would be okay because it doesn’t smell yet.
Itsuka: Monoma-kun doesn't really do apologies.
Togaru: Well, what a coincidence, 'cause I don't do forgiveness.
Sen: What's your favorite color?
Tetsutetsu: Kendo-san.
Sen:
Tetsutetsu: Wait, what was the question again?
Shihai: Once when I was a kid, I told my mother it was a teachers work day so I wouldn’t have to go to school but my mother wasn't an idiot so of course it didn’t work. But when we got to school, we found out it WAS teachers work day and that made me think I had superpowers so I started trying to kill my classmates with my mind to confirm the theory.
Juzo: You thought you had superpowers so you immediately attempt to murder someone?
Shihai: Go big or go home, Honenuki-kun.
Itsuka: Well... that was actually pretty decent.
Neito: Must have been if you're complimenting me.
Tetsutetsu: I don’t check the weather. Ever. Just won’t do it. Never have, never will.
Itsuka: How do you plan to do things outside?
Tetsutetsu: Bravely.
Setsuna: I have to say it, I'm a little bit embarrassed for you.
Kosei: This is a sports related injury! That makes me cool!
Sen: Dude, tripping over a basketball on the way to the bathroom is so not cool...
Neito: I have NEVER been so insulted!
Yosetsu: You don't listen much, do you?
Kinoko, pulling out a gun: Behold! The most powerful spell of all. Are you ready to meet God?
Itsuka: How are you so calm all the time?
Juzo: The trick is to be so stressed out that it becomes your default state of mind.
Itsuka: I'm not getting into anymore stupid debates with you.
Neito: Water is not wet.
Itsuka: How the fuck is water not wet? It's water!
Togaru: You look like a stupid Teletubby.
Manga: I am sick and tired of you questioning my authority. You sir have forced my hand! I challenge you to a fist fight!
Togaru: I will knock your teeth out, fucker.
Manga: Oop, that’s not very high society of you there, boi.
Pony: Did you get taller?
Manga: Six inches!
Juzo: That's amazing... Uh, how did you do that?
Manga: Socks.
Juzo: Socks? How many?
Manga: Forty pairs.
Togaru: You're a dork, no offense.
Jurota: You know, just because you say "no offense" doesn't excuse the offensive remark that inevitably follows.
Togaru: Well, in that case, you're a dork. Offense intended.
Itsuka: You’re going to be a great father, Neito-kun.
Neito: How can you be so sure?
Itsuka: Because I’ll be there to kick your ass if you aren’t.
Tetsutetsu: You look stressed.
Itsuka: Yeah, it’s the stress.
Shihai: My life isn't as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look.
Vlad King: You want to explain to me why you just HAD to run back into the dorms? Which were on FIRE?
Neito, covered in ash and holding 14 Vlad King action figures: Not really.
Kosei: I just don't understand why they call it "a pair of pants".
Hiryu: Why not?
Kosei: Because a pair means two, like a pair of shoes or a pair of gloves. Two shoes, two gloves. Why pair of pants?
Yosetsu: Because man, you would sound stupid if you were like "Hey, man. I love my new pant. You like my new pant? Check out my new pant!"
Manga: Butter is just food lotion.
Togaru: There’s something wrong with you.
Pony: I would die for you.
Juzo: I would die for you too.
Pony, tearing up: Please don’t do that.
Juzo: Why is Fukidashi-kun on the counter?
Togaru: He likes to be tall.
Kinoko: Setsuna-chan, tell Shihai-kun that he's an idiot, but I still love him.
Setsuna: Gross. Tell him yourself.
Kinoko: We're in a fight.
Setsuna: But you're sitting on his lap...
Neito: How come you’ve been abnormally nice to me lately?
Yosetsu: What do you mean?
Neito: You just seem nicer than usual.
Yosetsu: I’ll punch you in the face if you want.
Neito: I haven't told anyone this, but I think about going to Madagascar. Just packing up and leaving this all behind.
Tetsutetsu: Wow, thanks for sharing that with me. I guess I'll tell you my secret now-
Neito: Nope. Sounds like a long story. Let's just skip it.
Shihai: I need someone to translate five pages of archaic Latin. Obviously, that's not gonna happen anytime soon.
Jurota: I know archaic Latin.
Shihai: You know archaic Latin?
Jurota: I got bored with classical Latin.
Shihai: Just how smart are you?
Neito: Okay, why's it starting to feel like you're Batman and I'm Robin? I don't want to be Robin all the time.
Vlad King: Nobody's Batman and Robin any of the time.
Neito: Not even some of the time?
Vlad King: Just stay here!
Neito: Oh, my God! Fine.
Reiko: Not hating on the mentally healthy version of myself, but why does she have to make so many plans?
Togaru: You need to grow up.
Manga, tries to respond but fails because he has thirty gummy bears in his mouth:
Setsuna: I’m so tired I’m not even thinking straight.
Itsuka: You never think straight, you’re not straight.
Jurota: Hello, sir Kamakiri, where's sir Bondo?
Togaru: Don't know.
Jurota: When is he gonna be back?
Togaru: Don't care.
Jurota: Could you tell him I stopped by?
Togaru: Don't count on it.
Reiko: Based on my understanding of physics, I can confidently assert magnets function solely through witchcraft.
Kosei: I did nothing, I swear.
Hiryu: I’m not straight but I know a straight up lie when I see one.