Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Thor and Tony were playing video games in Tony’s apartment one afternoon. It had been a couple weeks since they had come out to Steve, and they had decided earlier that they were going to tell Tony today. But hours later, Thor still hadn’t said anything.

“Something on your mind?” Tony asked, clearly sensing Thor’s distraction. Not that that was a particularly impressive feat. Thor had just lost at Mario Kart about a dozen times in a row, and they usually won at least a few rounds, even against Tony.

“I do not quite know how to say it... I am not a man, as everyone thinks I am.”

“Okay. Care to elaborate? I’m not sure I understand.”

“I am genderfluid, I guess is most accurate, or genderqueer works as well. Sometimes I feel masculine, but sometimes I feel feminine, and sometimes I feel both or neither. It is difficult to explain.”

“You still have a cock, right?”

“Yes. Bruce asked me this as well. Why is it that everyone is so concerned with my genatalia?”

“Sorry bud. That was inappropriate, but that’s just me. I need to do some research.”

And Tony turned to grab his tablet and started frantically typing, apparently having forgotten that Thor was sitting right there. But that was typical Tony behavior.

Thor sighed. Tony had taken it pretty well and was currently doing research on gender identity, but Thor still thought it could have gone better.

Tony interrupted their thoughts, saying, “this website says I should ask for your preferred pronouns. And do you want me to use a different name for you?”

“Uh… they/them. And no, Thor is fine.”

“Do you want me to always use they/them or only with people who know?”

“Just with Steve, and maybe Bruce, for right now. Thanks.”

“No problem, bud,” Tony said absently, attention back on his tablet.

***

That went pretty well, Thor thought. Tony’s response had been very… Tony-ish. There was no other way to describe it. It had been nice in it’s own way, but once Thor had left Tony’s room, with Tony still doing research, they called Steve.

“Hey, Thor, how are you?” Steve asked over the phone.

“I’m… good. Yeah, I’m good. Do you mind if I come over to your place for a little while?”

“Sure. No problem. Sam went home for the weekend, so we’ll have the place to ourselves.”

“Thanks. I’ll be there in a couple minutes. I’m coming from Tony’s apartment.”

“Okay, see you soon,” Steve said before disconnecting.

It took Thor about five minutes to get to Steve’s dorm. They’d had time to think about Tony’s reaction more. It wasn’t bad really, but Thor knew they made the right decision about calling Steve. They needed a little support--and maybe a hug--right then.

The moment the door shut behind Thor, they launched themself at Steve, and hugged him close, nose finding its way into the crease between neck and shoulder. Fortunately Steve was the type of friend who rolled with the punches and simply hugged Thor back, not asking any questions.

“Sorry, I needed that,” Thor said when they finally broke apart.

“No problem. Wanna tell me about it?”

“I told Tony,” was their only reply.

Steve’s expression was incomprehensible, flickering between something like confusion and pride and anger as he tried to figure out the appropriate response.

“It’s fine. He was really good about it, but then he started doing research. It was too much Tony for me to handle.”

“Oh.” Steve’s expression was much calmer and happier now. “I’m happy for you. Do you want to stay for dinner? I was gonna order pizza and put on a movie.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“Pepperoni okay?”

Chapter Text

Nearly everyone had gone home for Thanksgiving, and campus was like a ghost town. Thor was a little lonely and missed their family back in Norway, but they appreciated the privacy that the break gave them. And Natasha had also stayed at school for the break, so Thor had at least one friend to talk to if they got bored.

When the Friday of break rolled around, Thor woke feeling feminine. And they decided that perhaps boredom wasn’t the only reason to give Natasha a call.

This wasn’t a conversation to have over the phone, so they texted her and asked to meet in a quiet part of campus. While they waited for her response, Thor dressed in simple jeans and a t-shirt, wishing that they owned even a single feminine outfit. Not like anyone would see it under their coat anyways.

“Greetings, Natasha,” they said when they saw the red head sitting on a bench ahead.

“Hey Thor,” she responded, “what is this about?” She looked confused, but not actually put out at having been dragged away from her room. She was starting to get a little lonely too.

“I thought that you might be able to help me with something. I’m- I’m genderfluid. Sometimes I feel feminine, sometimes masculine, sometimes both or neither. But I always look masculine, and I only own men’s clothes. I’m too nervous to buy women’s clothes and wouldn’t know how to, even if I did. But…,” they trailed off, having run out of steam and realising that they hadn’t given Natasha a chance to speak yet.

“Well, we can’t do much about clothes right now, but I can help you when you do want to look. But if we go back to my room, I can teach you how to do some things with makeup and your hair. You might not wear it in public, but this way you can at least do something in the privacy of your own room.”

“Thank you, Natasha,” they said a little brokenly, tears threatening to spill.

“Come on then,” she said brusquely, walking towards her dorm, and they followed.

Once in the room, Natasha turned to make a comment, having apparently just thought of something. “Do you want to shave your legs or armpits? It would be easier if there was a bath, but I have some razors.”

Thor hadn’t really even considered shaving, but now that it was in their mind, it sounded like a great idea, and with winter coming, it wasn’t like anyone was going to see anyways. So they nodded to Natasha.

She dragged a chair into the bathroom in her suite and set it next to the shower. “Trust me. It’ll be much easier this way.” Then she handed Thor a razor, some shave gel, and a towel and left the room. “Just call my name if you need anything.”

So Thor locked the door, stripped, laid the towel over the seat of the chair, and sat. It was surprisingly difficult to shave their legs, and they were grateful for the chair. They couldn’t imagine how difficult it would be to do this while standing in the tiny shower cubicle. By the time they were done, their legs had a few nicks in them but were free of hair up to their mid thigh, and the towel was a bit damp, though still usable. They felt much better when they got dressed again, relishing the feel of fabric against smooth skin.

Natasha was watching something on Netflix when Thor opened the bathroom door, and she smiled at them before pausing whatever it was and joining them.

“Alright. Hair first, just something simple for today,” she said as she situated the chair in front of the mirror and gestured for Thor to sit on it again. She began by brushing their hair and tried to explain each step as she pulled Thor’s hair into a neat fishtail braid which just barely fell over their right shoulder. Once that was done, she moved on to makeup. “Clint would be better at this,” she said, “but I can do the basics.” She smoothed liquid foundation over their face, and brushed just a hint of blush over their cheeks. Then she moved to their eyes, sticking to neutral tones and brown mascara, very carefully applied. And she ended with a soft pink lipstick.

When Thor looked at their reflection in the mirror, it hardly looked like them. It was still definitely their body, and their face was still there under the makeup, but now it was softer, more feminine. Tears pricked at their eyes for the second time that day, but they did their best to blink them away, having no desire to ruin the lovely makeup.

Natasha gave them a moment to take it in before inviting Thor to spend the rest of the day (and the night if they wanted). Natasha didn’t really cook, but she threw something in the microwave for a late lunch/early dinner, and it wasn’t half bad. And they spent the rest of the day watching chick flicks and eating too much junk food. Thor was a little overwhelmed by everything but couldn’t find it in themself to leave this little haven. So when night time rolled around, Natasha somehow managed to find a pair of old sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt that fit Thor well enough for the night. And they settled in on the couch, The Decoy Bride still playing in the background as they drifted off to sleep.