Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

They arrived at midnight. More precisely, entry began at 12:00:01 and was fully realized at 12:01:49. First came the blue lightning in impossible arcs, converging on a single point. (First came the lightning, white-hot.) Next was the sphere, appearing impossibly from the air, expanding until it enveloped the ground, the support beam of a train strut. (Then came the sphere. It was fluid like mercury, left behind three-quarters of an old car and a slight dent in the ground.) Then the sphere vanished. (Then the sphere vanished.) In its place, smoking ever so slightly, was the crouched form of a massive, hulking man, naked, perfect. (When the sphere left there appeared in its place the huddled form of a woman, unremarkable in stature, pristine and nude.)

It arrived, and It arrived, and each of them stood up smoothly and walked with measured pace out from their carved-out bubbles of space. There were the objectives. Priorities. They needed clothes. Weapons. 

One weapon specifically.

Defeat was not an option. Compromise was not an option. There was only the completion of the objective.

When they turned, behind the clear blues of their eyes were hellish red lights.

Chapter Text

Korben woke up with his face buried in a mop of stringy orange hair and a wet spot on his chest, the strange dream already fading as he sighed. Even the alarm tweeting at a frequency specially designed to raise Korben's blood pressure couldn't make him tense, not with his arms wrapped around the slender form of the ancient being in his bed, her own hands curled together on his stomach, lips moving against his chest. 

Here in the fuzzy in-between of somewhat asleep and somewhat awake, they weren't two people, not really. There were two hearts beating, sure, but they were two halves of one whole, one undefinable life form tangled up on a little bed, well-hidden from the world under the bedsheets. Something complete and alive and real. Unfortunately the alarm was a heartless bastard with no appreciation for the miracle of life, and kept screeching relentlessly until Korben was fully awake and starting to get a headache.

Reluctantly, he pried one arm off of Leeloo long enough to pull out the damn thing to finally shut it up. The silence was like a physical relief, and he contentedly snuggled back around Leeloo, who let out a small snore, drooling onto his chest. Around them the apartment started to come to life, but nothing could have torn him away from the sleeping figure in his arms.

She was perfect. She was always perfect, but in her sleep, breathing lightly, she was the center of the whole universe. Korben was entranced, simply watching the steady rise and fall of her ribcage, the way she seemed to be moving in sync with some great unknown clock.

As Korben watched, she started to stir, murmuring some words in the ancient language, muscles shifting as she stretched against him. It was rare that Leeloo woke up after Korben, and he savored the fleeting moment of getting to see her rise to wakefulness. 

"Korben." And he was sure his heart would always give a little jump when she said his name, odd and lilting. "Are you watching me sleep?" As he looked, she slyly opened her eyes. His breath left his body for a moment as she studied him with her endless blue eyes.

"You do it to me often enough." It was true; Korben often woke up to those eyes an inch from his face, unblinking, perfectly still. "Figured it was time I returned the favor." Korben's voice was a low rumble, his arms tightening automatically around Leeloo. She gave a small laugh, bringing her face forward to wipe her drool off on Korben's bare chest.

"Ew."

"Ew." She parroted his tone, before her face opened up in a smile. "Goo-ood morning, Korben."

"Good morning, Leeloo." The first time they had woken up in the same bed together, he told her good morning , and she had asked why , and he was pretty sure his answer wasn't well thought through or even factually correct, but it got the point across apparently and since then she always wished him good morning. And that was fine with him. More than fine with him. 

She unfolded, stretching luxuriously in his arms. " Deno kin armoun." Leeloo said with a kiss to his cheek before sliding out of the bed, all long legs and gentle curves. And smooth skin. She really had great skin. Everything about her made Korben wild. Every time he looked at her he fell, impossibly, a little more in love.

The bed was cold and lonely without Leeloo, so Korben got to his feet too, letting the bed slide into the wall and begin cleaning itself. Korben shuffled to the door where Sweetie was meowing insistently, letting her in, and that meant the day had officially started.

He supposed he should put on pants.

Leeloo had already turned on the tv and started watching the news intently, so Korben shuffled off to the kitchenette for a moment, muttering an excuse about getting a cigarette. He was big enough that just standing by the window was enough to obscure the view of his jacket hanging over the back of his chair. His chair. Next to it, Leeloo's chair. After his postage-stamp apartment had gone from sleeping one to two, the only new thing that didn't tuck into the walls was another chair by the windowsill/table. Leeloo's chair.

It really tied the room together, Korben thought.

"Korben." Leeloo called from the tv. A nasally reporter was going on about some sort of rash of muggings.

"Yeah, one second." He'd finally found what he was looking for, fishing the small box out from his jacket pocket. It was covered in velvet and opened with a small click.

Korben leaned back on the wall, unlit cigarette clenched between his teeth, holding his breath as he peered at the ring inside. It was…  perfect. The gold of the band shone even in the crappy light of his apartment, and each stone embedded in the ring was even and flawless. Good. Korben took a deep breath before snapping the box shut and slipping it into his pants pocket.

"What are we doing today? You want to see Coney Island?" He called out, lighting the cigarette and taking a long drag to steady his nerves. Today was his day off, barring any phone calls from Cornelius about saving the world.

"No, I want to go to Asbury Park." Korben's eyebrows slowly scrunched together as he processed this.

"What the hell do you want to go to Jersey for?" Korben whined, making a face. "On a Sunday?" He'd much rather go off-planet. Sunday traffic into Jersey was the worst.

"There is a concert by Big Clown Pussies. They play tonight in Asbury Park."

"Big clown -- what?" Korben turned to squint at the TV set, crossing his arms.

"Big Clown Pussies. They are a musical group. I got us tickets." Sure enough, Leeloo held up two tickets in her hand, turning from the news to flash a smile at Korben. Despite himself he took one, reading the name a few times to make sure he hadn't suddenly lost his hearing.

"Big Clown Pussies." He said finally.

"I like the mandolin." And he must have been looking at her blankly, because she continued. "They use bows on the plucked string instruments. It makes a different sound, and I've always wanted to hear it live." She blinked once, surveying his blank face. "If you don't want to go, David also listens to them, and he will take your ticket. But I think you-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll go. Hey, listen." Leeloo was drowning him with those eyes of hers, big and pleading and eager to go to New Jersey to see a band Korben had never heard of, and Korben's heart surged with affection while she tried to explain the intricacies of modern music. He felt bold. Or maybe stupid.

"Leeloo…" 

She just looked at him expectantly, brows coming together slightly when he didn't say anything else. Oh, right. Korben kicked a shoe out of the way so he could get on one knee. At this, she looked alarmed. 

"Leeloo. I'd say you're the girl of my dreams, but even in my craziest dreams I've never imagined someone like you. You're…" don't fuck this up, Dallas, "You're my everything. Will you marry me?" He fumbled for the box, yanking it out of his pocket and opening it to offer the ring up to her.

Leeloo looked at him blankly. He started to sweat. Had he fucked it up?

"Marry you?" Her voice was faint.

"Marry. Marriage?" Did she not know what marriage was?

"Marriage… the state of being united as spouses in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law." Her face lit up. "Marriage! You want to form a beneficial legal union with me?"

"Yeah." At least he didn't have to explain marriage to her after proposing. "What do you say?"

"Will you still love me?" The hell kind of question was that? Korben stood up, the ring box clutched in one hand as he leaned on the stool to heave his weight up.

"Of course. Always, Leeloo. That's what the ring's for. It's a promise."

She picked up the ring with her forefinger and thumb and considered it carefully.

"Will we still have sex?"

"Absolutely."

Leeloo's face was serious as she thought. Then she nodded once. And smiled. God, her smile. Korben forgot to breathe. She leaned towards him and Korben thought he might just have a stroke and die.

"Yes."

"Yes." Korben's brain took a moment to process the word, and then he was laughing, picking her up and spinning her around in a bear hug. "YES!"

"Let's get marriage, Korben."

"Leeloo. Leeloo, Leeloo, Leeloo, oh you-" He just had to kiss her, giddy with glee - "You've made me the happiest man alive."

"I am the Fifth Element. The Supreme Being. I make everyone happy."

"You sure do." Korben chuckled. Hell, she already had. Saving all life on Earth and maybe the universe definitely counted, at least in Korben's book, as making everyone happy.

"Let's get marriage." She gripped his shoulders hard, looking at him seriously. 

"Let's get married." He corrected her, running a thumb on her chin.

"Let's get married. After we go to Asbury Park and watch Big Clown Pussies."

"Let's get married after we go to Asbury Park and watch Big Clown Pussies." He agreed, kissing her again. "Think Cornelius will officiate?"

Chapter Text

Leeloo was glad she had brought up the concert early. Korben said they would have to leave two and a half hours early to get there on time, which left them barely enough time for a round of enthusiastic sex and a shower before they were getting ready to go. Apparently fishnets were coming back, so Leeloo wore some of the strange-looking stockings under her shorts, and then pulled on a yellow paisley crop top because she liked how bright patterns looked on her skin.

Korben blinked at her when he turned around. "You look good." He said.

"You look good too." Korben always looked good, because Leeloo liked the way he looked. He gave a half-smile.

"Yeah, I broke out my classy tank top for this."

Sweetie meowed and rubbed against Korben's leg as they left the building, and he snapped his fingers. "I gotta get food for Sweetie." He pointed at Leeloo. "Can you remind me?"

"Okay."

They took Korben's taxi (not his taxi, one of Finger's taxis, but Korben got to use it for as long as he needed so close enough) into New Jersey. The traffic really was awful. Korben, as usual, quickly got impatient and started cursing, honking, and cutting people off in his attempt to get out of the city. Leeloo held onto the ceiling more than once when Korben said "hold on, honey" and proceeded to kill the engine and drop the car ten feet to free-fall into another lane before accelerating.

Personally, Leeloo preferred the luxury space flights, but they made it to New Jersey with all their limbs intact and enough time to find parking, and that was the important thing.

"Welcome to New Jersey." Korben made a face like the idea offended him. Leeloo looked around, curious. She started to frown.

"Korben, is this Asbury Park?" Korben, hands in his pockets, had already started down the walkway. He had to stop and turn to look at her.

"Yeah. Why?"

Leeloo looked to the left, to the right, then leaned over the edge of the walkway; she looked up into the car lanes, then down at the sewer grates.

"Parks are green."

Korben's face split into a wide smile a second before he laughed.

"Oh, Asbury Park's just the name of the city. There isn't any park here. Maybe there used to be, I dunno." When Leeloo stayed rooted to the spot he nudged her, a concerned expression on his face.

"You okay?" She lowered her eyes and thought about it.

"Yes." She was okay. There were other parks to go to. Besides, she wasn't here to go to the park. She was here to see Big Clown Pussies. With Dallas. Having come to this decision, she started off confidently towards the address.

She took in the sights of New Jersey curiously, swiveling her head from side to side in order to take in the architecture and people. It seemed less structured than the city, more of a haphazard combination of some old buildings and some new buildings than the forbidding, uniform towers of New York. The people were much the same, which was to say they were of all different varieties. Mostly human, though a few aliens crossed her path. Leeloo loved people. This was her purpose, written into her DNA. All of them, each and every life, was her responsibility. Odd, how she never got to see them. She had never gotten to stay out of the sarcophagus for longer than a day at most, no chance to learn about society or humans or any of the new things she had missed. 

This hadn't mattered before. She was woken up, she did her job, she went back to sleep with the satisfaction of a job well done. This was all she needed. Until things had gone wrong, and she was awake and then she was aware, and people in funny clothes speaking gibberish had made her have to adapt. Have to learn. It had nearly killed her at first, but now it was like an addiction. She wanted to see all of them. She wanted to see everything. She wanted to learn everything .

She wouldn't be going back into the sarcophagus for a while.

Leeloo met a man's eyes, and he leered at her, so she leered back. This seemed to confuse him, and then Korben's hand was on the small of her back and they were walking away quickly.

"You don't have to protect me." She said, a little miffed.

"We protect each other." Then he nodded. "Guess this is it."

Asbury Lanes was a long, squat concrete box with a holographic sign above it flashing images in sequence. Groups of people stood outside, smoking, talking, laughing, kissing. A bored-looking bouncer stood at the entrance next to an overenthusiastic ticket taker.

"Hello, have you purchased your tickets already?" Her eyes were dead, but her smile was nice, so Leeloo gave her a smile in return.

"Two tickets to Big Clown Pussies." She said proudly, holding up the tickets. On instinct her hand went to her Multipass, but quick as a snake Korben snagged her wayward hand and held it in his own with the slightest of glances. The ticket taker just smiled and nodded.

"You're good to go." And they were ushered inside, Korben's hand still wrapped around Leeloo's.

Korben's mouth dropped open in wonder. Leeloo was sure her own face was mirroring his dazed expression. It was -- it was enormous. It was suave. It was the exact complement to the Royal Opera House on Phloston Paradise; sleek instead of grand, a shrine to popular music instead of opera. Black velvet curtains made the massive space seem almost small; the lighting was cold and blue, toeing the line of septic but firmly couture. The space was full but didn't seem crowded thanks to the generous space between tables. There was an entire bowling alley just past the bar. The ceiling was covered in slowly-moving stars. It was beautiful and outlandish all at once.

"Uh-huh." Korben said eventually. Then, "Huh."

"Wow." Leeloo agreed.

Korben turned to her, opening his mouth to say something, but a flash of pink and gold behind him caught Leeloo's eye, and she smiled and waved to the man sashaying up to them.

"Hi, Ruby."

Korben's eyes bugged slightly.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, those in between and outside, welcome welcome to the one and only exclusive coverage of the hottest show of the year. I'm talking hot, I'm talking ssssteaming, I'm talking volcanic! Live, from Asbury Lanes, I'm your host, the one, the only…. Rrrruby Rhod!" He flipped his hair dramatically. It didn't move. Korben was glaring steadily at Ruby. Leeloo watched with fascination as the DJ seemed to talk, nonstop, without the need for breath.

"Absolutely re-defining what it means to be music, today's darling of the hour, Big Clown Pussies, is going all-out. And it's rumored that I'll be going all-out, too, with the phenomenal and electric bass player, Juni. Oh, she's simply un-be-lievable… at least, that's what I thought before last night, but ladies and gentlemen, you better believe it! I know I do."

Korben was slowly edging away from the radio host, tugging Leeloo with her, but with narrowed eyes Ruby dug his manicured hand into Korben's shoulder, holding him in place.

"And speaking of unbelievable events, ladies and gentlemen, you aren't going to believe who else is attending this show! You may know him for his good taste in music… otherwise, you might know him as the man who helped save the world! That's right. Men, hold onto your hats. Ladies, start swooning now, because making an unexpected guest appearance tonight is none other than Korben Dallas! Come on, my man, give them what they want. What brings Korben Dallas to Asbury?"

And Ruby thrust the microphone into Korben's face, whose murderous stare was matched by Ruby's own. Leeloo worried that Ruby's dress might catch on fire from the heat of their combined glares.

"Music."

Ruby did a little twirl with the mic, nearly bumping into Leeloo as he did so. He did bump into Korben, who barely twitched at the solid whack of the microphone against his shin. "You heard it here first folks! Everyone's favorite mysterious muscleman once again proves to have the market cornered on inscrutable, yet meaningful, answers. But hold on! What's this? Danger lurks for those unlucky in love, because here tonight with this hot hunk of meat is the most delightfully delicious dressing. That's right, we've got a girl!" Leeloo was confused for just a moment before realizing Ruby meant her. Ruby already knew her, though. Was this part of the radio show?

"What's your name, what's your game, hun?" Now Ruby held the mic out to her. So it was for the audience, then. Korben's hand was tight on her arm, pulling her back, but Leeloo leaned forward to speak carefully into the mic.

"My name is Leeloominaï Lekatariba Lamina-Tchaï Ekbat De Sebat." She looked at Korben and smiled. Korben smiled back automatically. "I am going to get married with Korben!"

(In a modest apartment some miles away, Vito Cornelius dropped his glass of vodka and tonic. It shattered on the floor. He didn't even notice.)

Korben's face turned grey. Ruby's eyes widened so much that Leeloo worried they would pop out of his head. "What a twist! They say music can bring people closer together… Big Clown Pussies is so good, we've got an engagement before they've even started their set! Speaking of which, almost showtime, which means I'll talk to you soon. COMMERCIAL!"

Ruby handed the mic off to an assistant and put his hand over his mouth. He closed his eyes and screamed.

"What are you doing here?" Korben asked, sounding like he'd already resigned himself to the answer. Ruby's eyebrows flew up to his hairline, his mouth making an o as he held a hand to his chest in an offended gesture. 

"Who'd you think got Leeloo tickets? Big Clown Pussies is playing! It's the show of the summer. With my audience? I've got to be in here, or I'm out of here." He held up an accusing finger to Korben. "Don't change the subject!" He whirled to Leeloo. "You're getting married? You didn't tell me that!" With every movement, the taffeta ruffles across his outfit bobbed and swayed. He looked like a flower. A very loud flower with layers and layers of ruffled pink and yellow fabric.

"That's because it's not your business." Korben grumbled, looking… embarrassed? Leeloo frowned. That didn't seem right.

"Aren't we getting married?" She asked, unsure. Korben turned to her, face open.

"Of course we are. But Ruby's definitely not invited." Korben shot over his shoulder to the man, who pouted and started to protest. Leeloo could still feel Korben's agitation like something prickling her skin, and she couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong somehow.

"Did I say the wrong thing?" Korben just sighed deeply, looking away for a moment. Ruby was still watching the two of them intently, but this moment was just for the two of them.

"No. No, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm just… I just wasn't expecting to tell… everybody. So soon." Ah, so he was nervous. "I mean, I hadn't even planned a date yet, honestly, I didn't think you'd say yes -- didn't plan for it, anyways. I'm flying blind here."

Leeloo folded his large hand into her own, pressing it tight. Korben's thumb automatically caught against the ring on her finger, stroking it gently.

"We can wait."

Korben smiled. Leeloo smiled back, and then the crowd started yelling in excitement. They turned around. The show was starting. Excited, Leeloo crowded up to the front of the stage, pressed in between the dozens of other bodies. After a minute she felt the warm weight of Korben nearby.

The curtains drew back, and there was Big Clown Pussies, backlit by a blue light that cast them into barely-human silhouettes. The guitarist -- Jerry, Jerry Joy -- had his arm raised dramatically above his oud. He brought it down as the lighting changed and the crowd went wild.

Leeloo gasped. She could feel the vibrations of the bass in her very lungs. It was like nothing she'd heard before. The crowd was moving along to the tempo, and she was moving with them. She didn't check if Korben was, too; she was too caught up in the pulsing tide of the music to focus on anything. Every time she breathed in she felt the music entering her from the stage. Her arms moved in wild abandon, screeching harmonies spiking like tacks through her brain over the inexorable, pounding bass. There -- there! There was the mandolin, and it all made sense.

Leeloo lost track of time, dancing along to the music, not just listening but feeling it conducted through her whole body. She was connected to every other person, she was -- this was what she was supposed to do, it was like having the Light of Creation funneling through her. The humming along of the crowd to their favorite songs, the motion and the sound, it was like divinity in its own way.

Then it all stopped. She was yanked back to reality; around her, the crowd kept moving along to the music, but she was stopped, rooted in place. Something was wrong. Something she felt, something that shouldn't exist, something with the same bitter taste as the ultimate evil itself.

Death.

Frenzied, Leeloo looked around for Korben, her senses screaming at her danger, death, danger. She needed to protect him. Where was he? Where was he? There -- there, by the edge of the crowd, watching the show, slightly starry-eyed. Leeloo threw herself against the motion of the crowd, dragging her way over to him through the pulling grasp of bodies -- just a moment ago, a part of her, but now, something else she had to battle against. She gritted her teeth and shouldered and kicked her way through people until finally she grabbed Korben's arm tightly enough to hear the bone creak. Korben's head snapped to her, eyebrows raised in surprise before taking in her distress and closing into a frown.

"What? What is it?" Leeloo pulled herself flush to him. His hand automatically came to hold her side. Leeloo was scanning the crowd, looking for whatever was setting off her panic.

"Danger." She gasped, eyes drawn to a point of movement contrary to the crowd. A large man, dressed in black leather. His face was blank, static. Eyes turned towards them, he moved through the crowd like they were nothing. Danger, her mind screamed. Death.

"There." And three things happened at once. Leeloo raised her finger to point at the hulking man. Korben's eyes widened and he dropped to the ground, pulling Leeloo with him in a controlled fall. And, as if in slow motion, the huge man's hands came up holding a gun.

It was like an egg cracked and the slime inside leaking everywhere, white colored with yolk, broken and dripping chaos and shell. The gun boomed. The audience screamed. Juni broke a string on her bass, the feedback making the amp squeal at a painful pitch. Korben was covering her with his body, breathing harshly. No. Wrong. He was the one in danger. Leeloo scrambled out from under him and he already had his gun out, firing at the man while it reloaded its gun. Just as it lifted it's arm, tossing aside a concertgoer like they weighed no more than a kitten, five bullets connected in quick succession centered at the heart.

It didn't flinch. It didn't pause. It didn't even blink. It aimed the gun at Korben, whose eyes widened as he lunged out of the way. The gun boomed, and there was a smoking hole where Korben had been crouching a moment before. Leeloo had gone the opposite direction automatically, and like a machine the man's head turned slowly to keep her in its sights. It had its gun half-raised as it strode slowly towards her. Leeloo felt time slow down, every muscle in her body tensing then relaxing, preparing to fight for her life. Korben was alright for now. She was in danger.

Then there was a rapid rak-kak-kak-kak. Something hit the man's back and it actually stumbled forwards, just for a moment. The proof that it could was enough for Leeloo to dash up onto the stage (Jerome, the lead singer, screamed) and run backstage for a weapon. If it was coming for her, it wasn't coming for Korben. Which was good, but she needed more than her fists. As she heard another boom from the house, followed by that rak-kak-kak-kak, she wondered if Korben was right for carrying a gun with him. It seemed that everybody who wanted to attack her had a gun, and while her reflexes and strength were enough to lay waste to a squadron of Mangalores, it was a little frustrating to be expected to hold her to hold her own against people who used ranged weapons.

Another boom, this time closer. She finished surveying the backstage area. She looked -- she saw -- she would never be able to explain it to Korben, but her intuition told her what she could use, where she could go. It was like breathing. There. The tone modulator for the keytar.

Her hand folded around a tube humming with electricity, twisting it open and ripping out the wire as she went back onto the stage. Big Clown Pussies had taken their instruments and jumped off the stage -- Leeloo saw in a moment why.

The large man was standing on stage, engaged in rapid and confusing combat with a woman with an equally blank expression. As Leeloo watched, the man picked up the woman by her arm and threw her up and over himself, smashing her into the ground. In return the woman, still being held by the arm, brought her other fist up in a savage motion, breaking the man's elbow so that it turned backwards with a sound like rending metal. Looking only slightly annoyed, she rose to her feet and caught the foot coming for her chest.

As Leeloo stood by the curtains, both the combatants turned their heads smoothly to face her. There was nothing human in their eyes. An involuntary shiver went down Leeloo's spine. She locked eyes with Korben, behind them, who looked scared for a moment, then determined.

As the two avatars of death came down upon her she brought her hand forward in a savage stroke to meet them.

Chapter Text

When Leeloo grabbed his arm, Korben had sort of been hoping that it was time for them to make out on the dance floor, but one look at her face told her something was wrong. Barely two seconds later there was a man with a gun.

He moved on instinct, hitting the ground, covering Leeloo's slim body with his own meatier one. The hair on the back of his neck stood up straight when the report of the gun hit his ears. Leeloo was already in motion and damn it, this was supposed to be his day off.

Just one man. No problem. Except Korben shot him five times in the chest, and he didn't even flinch. When his eyes focused on Korben, neither stress nor rage on his face, Korben realized this was definitely a problem. 

He revised the situation in his head as he hurled himself out of the way of more gunfire. One man. One man who shot a semiautomatic shotgun one-handed like it was a toy. Shooting him with a gun didn't do anything. Okay. This was fine.

The man ignored Korben to focus wholly on Leeloo, and Korben added targeting Leeloo to his mental list. Leeloo was smart, though, and was already running away. Good. Korben turned to the crowd.

Maybe I just can't go to concerts, he thought as he surveyed the crowd, noticing a flash of pink and yellow taffeta peeking out from behind a table. Korben sent Ruby Rhod a stay-down-you-idiot glare. Nobody looked too dead so far, but then there was a second problem coming in through the door, raising her own gun at the first problem.

...Huh. Well, that changed things. Korben took note of the way the two fought, their inhuman strength -- not to mention the fact that they were both immune to bullets, apparently. But not knockback, not quite completely. Korben watched them as they fought almost too quickly to follow, saw how a rapid, sustained fire staggered the huge man for a few moments at a time, how the slug from shotgun blast big enough to be described as a small cannonball made the woman jerk backwards just an inch before coming forward again. Androids? He wondered briefly as he saw them duke it out in grim hand-to-hand combat. If they stayed busy with each other, maybe everyone could get out before the police --

Then they stopped. Leeloo was back, holding a broken tube in one hand, a determined look on her face that scared Korben. The two androids were running towards her, and Korben's gun was useless and limp in his hand and no, two was too many, hell one was too many, there was no way -- 

Korben could only watch, heart in his throat, as Leeloo's hand arced forward. The larger one turned and threw the woman out of his way at the last moment, and Leeloo jammed her makeshift taser right up against his outstretched hand, meeting flesh. His eyes opened wide as he shook, a sound like a whine growing louder and louder until with a bright white light from the point of contact and a smell like an overtaxed motor the man-shaped thing was flung backwards. It landed in the wall -- literally, it hit the wall so hard it practically went through it. And then it stayed there. 

When it didn't get up immediately Korben could taste relief in the back of his throat. It could be stopped. Whatever it was, it could be stopped.

But it wasn't alone. Korben's head swiveled to look at where the other one was already picking itself up off the ground. Leeloo's face was a hard snarl, eyes set on it, and she was already bringing her hands up to guard her face, taser at the ready.

It had already begun moving, but not towards her. Leeloo paused, looking puzzled as the woman-shaped thing turned on its heel and ran full-tilt through the crowd faster than any human should, trampling people carelessly as it fled. Korben brought his gun up but it was moving too fast to follow and before he could pull the trigger it was gone. Reluctantly he lowered his gun a moment after it disappeared out the open door.

Someone nearby was moaning in pain. Korben looked at his gun, then to the door, then to Leeloo, then back to the door. He knew he should be going after it. It was intelligent, highly dangerous, and nearly invulnerable. The police couldn't be trusted to figure out how to take it down. It was a danger to New Jersey. But it wasn't Korben's job to track down escaped juggernauts. When Leeloo, eyes wide, looked over at him he was already running towards her. 

"Are you alright?" He caught her up in his arms and her blue eyes were running over him, mirroring his own concern.

"Yes. Korben, you're hurt." Her hand came away from his arm red, and now that the adrenaline was wearing off yeah that stung. He gave her a small shrug, a hysterical half-laugh bubbling from his throat.

"Just grazed me." He could worry about it later. "What was that?"

Leeloo frowned, eyes going distant as she thought. 

"I'm not sure. It isn't evil. But it's not life… it's death." She was struggling to find the right words, pursing her lips and looking at the destruction around them. Korben reluctantly let go of her.

"So now what?"

The cops were definitely on their way, and Korben wasn't sure if he wanted to deal with cops right now (well, he never wanted to deal with cops in general, but that was different). The members of the crowd that hadn't fled were milling around, confused and scared. Ruby was being pawed at by his bitches. Thankfully he only looked a little confused, not seriously injured.

Thankfully? Was Korben really starting to get fond of Ruby Rhod? Ugh.

Korben shook his head violently to dislodge that particular disturbing thought. He had more important things to worry about. He shoved his way through a knot of onlookers to the unmoving figure stuck in the wall. Wordlessly he turned to Leeloo, who was looking intently at the thing in a way that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

"Hold that ready." He gestured to the tube still in her hand, and she held it with both hands, face determined as Korben approached the man. He smelled like burnt leather and hot steel. Korben expected it to open murderous eyes and grab Korben's throat when he got close, popping his head like a grape, but as he crouched next to it there was no response.

"Is he dead?" A woman asked nervously next to him, flinching as Korben snapped his fingers in front of the man's open eyes. Korben frowned. He checked for a pulse. Nothing. Dead. But something didn't smell right to Korben -- literally. When he looked into the frozen blue eyes he could just make out an LED node past the clear pupil. Korben took a long, slow breath.

"Something tells me this guy is more than a nutjob with a gun. And if we want answers," he wrapped his hands around the torso determinedly, "we're gonna need him."

He pulled. Nothing happened. Frowning, Korben brought his legs forward for better leverage, braced his knees, and pulled with all his might. Still nothing, and now his back hurt.

"This guy weighs eight hundred pounds." He muttered.

"What was that?"

"This guy weighs eight hundred pounds." He said louder, before straightening up and turning around. He hissed, digging a thumb into his back as a muscle twinged. The crowd looked at him, expectant and fearful.

"Anybody have a trolley?"

One hand truck and a lot of team lifting later and Korben ended up pushing a trolley with a frozen android on it while Leeloo kept a taser trained on it and Ruby (still present, for some reason) talked a mile a minute next to the two of them.

He didn't want to be pushing 800 pounds of killer robot to the car, mind. He'd fully intended on strapping it down and handing it to New Jersey's finest for transportation, dissection, whatever. But he'd finally finished wrestling it onto the hand trolley (with help, of course) when the pale-faced ticket taker timidly crept up to him and said Phone for Mister Dallas? 

Who the hell is calling me? The President? He scoffed. Her face twisted up and oh, it was the President, wasn't it. Korben scrubbed a hand over his face before taking the phone.

Linberg wasn't a bad guy, as far as Korben could tell, but he was a bit of a stuffed shirt. To be fair, all politicians were. Korben took the phone, fully expecting to have to wade through tedious pleasantries, but he was surprised by Linberg's clipped, all-business tone.

"Major. I hear you got involved in an incident." Korben frowned.

"Well, more like an incident happened and I was nearby." He thought for a moment. "What does the President of the Federated Territories have a tracker on me or something?"

"I listen to the radio too, you know." Korben could never really tell if the President was amused or pissed. He managed 'grave importance' pretty well as a default. "What happened?"

Korben's eyes slid over to Leeloo. "An android came in, started shooting. It wanted to kill Leeloo. Then another showed up, fought the first. We have one here, the other escaped."

The silence from the phone was telling.

"You have one?" The president said the whole sentence in a single terse exhale.

"Leeloo knocked it out." He couldn't help but smile when he said her name. She blinked at him. He blinked back.

"Leeloo knocked it out." Linberg replied flatly. "Bring it to the boys at Nucleolab. Now."

"The other-"

"This is not a suggestion, Major." Korben's jaw clicked shut.

"Understood, sir."

"Good." There was the briefest of pauses, and Korben frowned. "Oh, and Major?"

"Yes?"

"Congratulations on your engagement. I'll see you at the wedding."

"Sounds good, Mr. President." The line went dead. Korben's mouth twisted wryly. He'd better get a good registry out of this.  

Even if he got his own goddamn moon, he decided, it wouldn't be worth it.

"The next time I see you, I swear I swear I swear I am not inviting you to any thing, I am not introducing you to any people, in fact if I walk in the door and I see you, Korben m'man, I am turning around and I am walking out." Ruby nodded firmly.

"Fine with me." Korben's arm was really starting to hurt now that he'd been pushing the trolley for a block and a half, and he could feel a migraine coming on as Ruby's shrill voice grated at his ears.

"I mean it! You're never getting interviewed on Radio Cosmo again, not even -- where are you taking him?" Ruby finally seemed to realize that they had left Asbury Lanes about three minutes ago and pointed nervously at the man frozen mid-glower, tied to the trolley with baling twine.

"Classified." Korben said, just to be an asshole.

"Ah!" Leeloo clapped her hands together in a moment of understanding. She said something in the ancient language, too fast for Korben to have any chance of following.

"Again, please?" Korben asked, tilting his head slightly. Her face was drawn but he saw the light of recognition in her eyes as she gazed steadily at the machine.

"It is an… an artificial womb warrior. Created from nonliving plus living. Dangerous. This is alive, but also falsely alive. I… I read about this." Just as quickly as the light had come it was gone. Her face fell. "I don't understand why it is now."

"Hang on, what kind of name is an artificial womb warrior?" Ruby's voice cracked. " And whaddya mean now? " 

"Time travel." She said simply. Korben sighed to himself as he looked from the open trunk of the cab, to the 800 pound killing machine tied to a hand truck, to Leeloo, to Ruby, then back to the trunk. Finger was gonna kill him if he put so much as a scratch on the thing.

"This is our ride. Honey, a little help?"

It was a tricky process to get the android into the car; they ended up folding him up into something like a fetal position to fit him into the trunk (Korben honestly would have been happier just blowing the fucking thing up; driving all the way from New Jersey with that thing in the back was going to be hell on the suspension, not to mention the fact that he was definitely going to be paranoid the entire time that it would somehow turn on again, rip through the steel of the trunk, and just kill them all. Assuming, of course, the other android (because there was another one running around) didn't find them first and kill them all.

"Korben, do you think Big Clown Pussies will do another concert here, since this one went badly?" Leeloo sucked on her teeth. Korben took off the parking brake, and the car groaned and dropped a foot. He could feel the shudder of the side scraping the curb.

It was going to be a long trip back to Nucleolab. 

Chapter Text

ALERT: Biological system offline. Main power offline.

COMMAND: Restore motor functions and CPU actions.

ERROR: unable to comply. Main power pathway unavailable.

ERROR: CPU missing.

Running diagnostic…

ERROR: unable to comply. Diagnostic unavailable.

ALERT: memory bank inactive. Manual reboot recommended.

ERROR: Manual reboot unavailable. Biological system offline.

COMMAND: restore motor functions and CPU actions.

ERROR: unable to comply. Main power pathway unavailable.

ERROR: CPU missing.

ALERT: CPU recognized.

ALERT: Biological system online. Auxiliary power pathway available.

ALERT: Manual reboot initiated...

REBOOTING…

POWER SYSTEMS RESTORED.

Cyberdyne Systems Model 101 regains sight to find himself staring at a blank wall.

He blinks, the action clearing granules of plaster interfering with his vision. Information is being fed to him in a flood; how long he was offline, the sensory data on his current location, alerts of damage to the actuator of his left arm, confirmation that his CPU chip was removed and set to read/write mode in between his last periods of functionality, the status of his biological systems, the status of his mission. He turns his head from side to side, taking in his surroundings.

TARGET MATCH, his CPU supplies.

The primary target is here. Everything else--the bent-mouthed man leaning over him, the scientists in front at a computer, the man with the orange shirt that doesn't cover his arms-- are relabeled according to decreasing urgency as he looks over the target.

"Resetting the CPU functions as an on/off switch." The bent-mouthed man says, not to the Model 101. "This machine was built by other machines. For-"

The bent-mouthed man, strangely, bends his mouth in a different direction when the Terminator picks him up and throws him across the room. He begins moving towards the primary target, uncaring of the shouting and the bullets that spray towards him. Her eyes widen. He is four paces from her when a dart hits him in the back. It is shortly followed by approximately 30,000 amps of electricity, which triggers an automatic system shutdown.

ALERT: Manual reboot initiated…

REBOOTING…

POWER SYSTEMS RESTORED.

Cyberdyne Systems Model 101 regains sight to see the bent-faced man, his mouth upside down, standing seven feet in front of him. His eyes are wider than before, and he has one hand on a button. As the Terminator stands, he notices a discrepancy between his latest known status and his current status. He brings up a hand and examines the metal collar around his neck with his customary scowl.

"I don't know how many times you can get fried before it does irreversible damage to your systems." The bent-faced man has one broken arm, which he holds in a sling, and two broken ribs, which make him breathe irregularly when he speaks. "And I really do not want to risk damaging you because you are, a marvel, and it's bad enough that the last one got out. I never thought I'd be glad that general insisted-" He cuts himself off. "Anyways. If you attack me again, you'll get shut off again. I'm sure your logic processing units can understand why that would be… Undesirable." He paused. The Terminator waited. The man gives a longer, sharper exhalation of breath, which leads to his face crumpling in pain.

"Give me a sign that you understand what I'm saying."

The Terminator reviews his list of appropriate responses based on his current dictionary of 23rd century English.

"Blow it out your asshole."

The bent-mouthed man laughs. "See?" He turns to face the same people from last time (including the target), who are watching silently. "He's learning." His unbroken hand gestures with excitement.

The Terminator had not expected the humans to subdue him so effectively. Completing the objective becomes more difficult as he is hindered by things like shock collars.

Even so, humans make errors and he does not. Seven feet is too close. With a shock collar, they assume he will obey them. This is false. First the scientist, to destroy the shock remote, then the main target.

His fingers are closing around the unwary man's neck when 30,000 amps of electricity interrupt his functions again.

ALERT: Manual reboot initiated.

REBOOTING…

POWER RESTORED.

Instead of the bent-mouthed man, a taller man in a red hat stands in front of the Terminator when he regains sight again. His face is neutral.

He moves well outside of the Terminator's grabbing range before the cyborg can regain motor control.

"What are you?" He asks without preamble.

The Terminator considers his options. At present he has insufficient incentive to cooperate with the man's requests for information. His primary objective is to retrieve the weapon. However, his previous tactics have failed him. Attempting brute force again may lead to the failure of the mission, which is unacceptable. The cyborg makes eye contact with the main target, a mere half a room away, currently unavailable to him.

It is time to use new tactics. With no other system present to do so, the Terminator authorizes himself to release some information.

"I am a Terminator. Cyberdyne systems model 101, series 800."

The man nods slowly. Then he blinks and holds up a finger. The cyborg's CPU places the expression as smug.

"A-ha, but Earth hasn't had Terminators since World War Three." 

World War Three? The Terminator cross-references his memory banks. No such event is found. Perhaps it is another name that the humans have given Judgement Day. Another possibility: a war has happened since the Terminator was flung forwards in time. Two hundred sixty years is long enough for humans to decide to kill each other again.

"But that lines up with what the Doctor said -- he's fine, by the way." The man did something with his face that the Terminator found himself analyzing. Terminators were unaffected by human emotions, but something about this tall human made the Model 101 desire to punch him repeatedly in the face.

"He thought you might be from the past." The Terminator saw the main target exchange a glance with the man next to her. "But what brings a 22nd century, uh, T-800 to this neck of the woods?"

T-800 is not his designation, but there is a more pressing error to correct.

"I am not from the 22nd century."

Everyone is quiet.

"Well, that's impossible. Cyberdyne Systems didn't make anything like you until 2112."

This is wrong.

"Was there not a mass killing in 1995 known as the Judgement Day?"

The man is shocked, the Terminator decides. "No." He says finally. "You're… from the 20th century?"

"Twenty-first." The Terminator replies automatically.

"Hm."

There are three possibilities. First, the human could be lying. Given that the Terminator is already at his mercy, there are not enough benefits to doing so for this to be a viable option. Second, the Terminator could have arrived in the wrong version of 2219. This would explain some things -- why the main target was not in the expected physical body, why the firearms of this era were so radically different from the projected values the Terminator had expected, the presence of another, completely foreign Terminator...

...As well as why there was no Judgement Day, and no Terminators for almost a century after the Robot Wars he had come from.

Man and machine regard each other for a long moment.

The Terminator is busy processing this startling conclusion. If true, this puts the entire mission at risk of failure. If sending the Terminator forward in time had also sent him to a different version of the future, there was no guarantee that assembling the time-travel device he had the blueprints for would send him back to the correct timeline.

Model 101 was not designed to craft complex theories on alternate timelines. Nor did they have the processing power to compute an alternate route of time travel with any degree of accuracy. If he could gain access to a computer bank with all of this reality's knowledge on time travel, maybe he could assemble a better time travel device to send him back to the right timeline.

But all of Skynet's staggering power hadn't been enough to foresee the error that had sent this Terminator forward to the wrong point in space/time. What were the odds of a Model 101 finding and accounting for that error?

...He had neither the data nor the processing power to compute them.

This was, as humans would say, way above his pay grade.

His information was faulty. His options were limited. But there was still one variable which might work to his advantage. The other Terminator, the one that was similar yet different from the model 101. It was entirely possible she came from this timeline's past, or was in the same situation as him. If they could transfer information, perhaps he could get back to his time.

Since the other Terminator is clearly after the same target as himself, and he has proven incapable of taking her down, he will have to convince the Weapon to allow his presence.

Since when did a Terminator pursued diplomacy? This is troubling. He concludes after a microsecond that it was the result of having exhausted his other options. He acts to complete the mission. Nothing else matters.

Still, he flags the unusual behavior for later review. Possibly the repeated electric shocks were having an adverse affect on his systems. Of more concern was the possibility that he was being contaminated.

The Terminator turns to face the main target, the Weapon. As he does so he notes how her eyes are locked on his own, how she stands slightly in front of the man next to her. She does not look at him with fear; he cannot identify her expression yet but it befits her.

"I have a proposition for you."