Work Text:
In general things were going quite well for Zhao Yunlan. Excluding of course the ever-present anxiety of not knowing when and how he would be able to go back to his time. But apart from that, being in the past wasn’t that bad. Until of course it happened. And yes, it was entirely Da Qing’s fault. Zhao Yunlan really preferred it in the beginning when Da Qing was all wide-eyed admiration and full of respect for Kunlun. But that lasted only for a few days and then he started behaving more and more like a spoiled kitten.
And right now not only had that damn cat stolen the last lollipop from the pocket of Zhao Yunlan’s jacket, he did it shamelessly in front of Zhao Yunlan, so Zhao Yunlan had no choice but to chase him and try to get back what was rightfully his. Of course Da Qing was quicker in his cat form, but thankfully Zhao Yunlan was much smarter, so he managed to corner Da Qing in Ma Gui’s workshop. Which, as it turned out later, was a big mistake.
Because cornered Da Qing didn’t really watch when he was jumping while he tried to wriggle out of Zhao Yunlan’s grasp. And he managed to stick his fluffy little butt into some innocent-looking contraption, resting peacefully on the small table by the wall, at the same time Zhao Yunlan finally grabbed him by the fur on his back.
Da Qing yowled. Zhao Yunlan cursed. The contraption shattered on the floor, letting out a flare of bright light. And of course it wasn’t as innocent as it looked, which Zhao Yunlan found out by freezing completely for a few seconds and then blacking out. The last sound he heard was Da Qing’s pitiful meow.
When he opened his eyes the first thing he saw was a table’s leg. Was he lying on the floor? Maybe he fainted? Also his vision was blurred and everything looked kinda greyish, and the few colors that remained seemed washed out. Damn it, he probably hit his head. He turned his gaze to the right and the next thing he saw was the soles of someone’s shoes. Had someone else fainted, too? What the fuck happened here?
Before he was able to form another thought he heard someone enter the workshop.
“Kunlun?” someone’s voice said uncertainly. And then after a tiny break the same voice shouted “Kunlun!”
Zhao Yunlan knew that voice very well.
“Shen Wei,” he said.
His voice sounded strange and the blurriness still didn’t disappear from his eyes. He shook his head, but it didn’t help. He raised his hand to rub at his eyes. Or at least tried to, but it seemed that it was hard to rub your eyes with a paw. Wait a moment... A paw? And that here was the moment when Zhao Yunlan’s train of thoughts came to a screeching halt, and he spent the next few long seconds staring blankly at a small, furry paw that was somehow his hand now.
At the same time the person on the floor sat up with a loud groan.
“Ow, my poor head,” he complained.
Ok, that was... No, Zhao Yunlan still wasn’t able to form any coherent thoughts, because right now he was looking at his own face.
“Did you have to grab me so hard? I think you tore some of my fur out. It hurt,” Zhao Yunlan’s mouth said.
“Kunlun?” Shen Wei said again.
He looked frozen, too, kneeling on the floor, eyes wide and surprised, but as he said the name he wasn’t looking at that impostor in Zhao Yunlan’s body, he was looking at Zhao Yunlan. Zhao Yunlan’s heart squeezed looking at Shen Wei’s worried face, and before he even realized what he was doing his current body moved as if on its own accord closer to Shen Wei and started to rub itself comfortingly against his knees.
Realization slammed into Zhao Yunlan’s mind. That damn fat cat!
“You damn fat cat!” he shouted. “I will kill you!”
Da Qing, because it was certainly him in Zhao Yunlan’s body, threw him a wounded look. And it was really strange to see it on his own face.
“What did I...” he started to say in an offended voice, but then he stopped abruptly, the wounded look in his eyes replaced by shock.
“What?” he asked weakly. “But.. what...”
He patted his face with his hands and then stared for a few seconds at his palms turning them up and down.
“What?” he repeated. And then he added “How?”
Well, that was a good question. Zhao Yunlan could swear that it had to do something with that suspicious contraption of unknown purpose, that shattered on the floor before. Technology nerds really were the same here and in the future. And it seemed that Ma Gui shared Lin Jing’s inclinations for building things that tended to blow up with unpredictable consequences for everyone in close proximity.
“I guess we changed bodies,” he said.
Da Qing stared at him. “Um, what?” he asked again. And then he frowned and his eyes widened with sudden fear. “Aaaa!” he shouted. “Will I stay in your stupid body forever?”
Zhao Yunlan froze. That he didn’t think about. He really, really hoped that whatever happened was reversible. Shen Wei, who until this moment was just listening motionless and letting Zhao Yunlan sit on his foot, gently pushed him away and stood up.
“I’m going to find Ma Gui,” he said.
He hesitated, but then he bent and patted Zhao Yunlan lightly on his head before leaving. Which was nice and all, but damn it, that was not the kind of touch from Shen Wei that he wanted.
“I’m not a cat. I don’t want to be a cat. It sucks,” Zhao Yunlan said sulkily.
“Just change into a human form and stop whining,” Da Qing said, visibly judging Zhao Yunlan’s derision of a superior cat form.
Oh, right, why hadn’t he thought of that before? But wait, how?
“How?” he asked
“What do you mean how? Just do it,” Da Qing said impatiently.
Ok, let’s see. Zhao Yunlan closed his eyes and tensed up. I’m a human, he thought, I’m a human. And waited... And waited... And waited... But nothing happened.
“I’m still a cat, am I not?” Zhao Yunlan asked in a resigned voice without opening his eyes. He opened his eyes. Yep, still a cat.
“You’re useless,” Da Qing commented. “Even little kittens can do it, and you can’t?”
He jumped to sit on the table, and that movement looked really graceful. And why didn’t Da Qing have any problems operating somebody else’s body? That was so unfair. Zhao Yunlan plonked down on the floor with a dejected sigh.
And that’s how Shen Wei and Ma Gui found them a few minutes later. Shen Wei must have told Ma Gui what happened, because Ma Gui didn’t ask any questions, he just gave one curious and fascinated glance at Da Qing perched on the edge of the table and a second one at Zhao Yunlan slouching on the floor. He also looked as if he was trying very hard not to laugh. Zhao Yunlan didn’t even have the energy to be offended anymore.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m a cat,” he said. “Just tell me how can I get back in my body again.”
Ma Gui gave out a little awkward cough.
“Well, I have to admit I don’t really know,” he said.
“Seriously?” Da Qing and Zhao Yunlan said together.
“I was working on something that could potentially transfer one’s spirit to some other place it might need transferring to,” Ma Gui said. “Not to another body though. Although I did meet a Dixingren, who could do that once. That’s what gave me the idea actually. I started wondering about the possibilities and...”
“And you should have stopped at wondering,” Zhao Yunlan interrupted him rudely.
Ma Gui stopped talking and gave Zhao Yunlan an apologetic look. Shen Wei’s look on the other hand was a mixture of compassion and amusement. Zhao Yunlan’s glance in response must have been properly reproachful, because Shen Wei’s gaze instantly turned apologetic, too. He bent a little and took Zhao Yunlan into his arms. Zhao Yunlan wanted to protest at first, but it was nice and he needed it. Shen Wei sat down, keeping Zhao Yunlan on his lap.
Da Qing sighed. “Please tell me that I will be back in my own body soon. Even if you have to lie,” he said.
“It should reverse back in a day,” Ma Gui said. Then he hesitated and added “Maybe two. I’m relatively sure it won’t be more than two days. It’s hard to be precise with this material and I had to use...”
Ma Gui continued his explanation about the meteor’s qualities and the tools that were needed, but Zhao Yunlan wasn’t really listening, his mind stuck on “a day, maybe two”. He had to stay a cat for a day or two? Zhao Yunlan groaned. Or rather tried to; instead that groan came out more like a grumpy meow. Ma Gui hid a smile.
“Aww, that sounded so cute,” Da Qing said. “Why did nobody tell me how cute I sound like that?” he added with pretension in his voice.
Zhao Yunlan wanted to answer with something scathing about how Da Qing definitely never sounded that cute and all the cuteness right now was just Zhao Yunlan’s personal charm. But then Shen Wei lightly scratched his head between his ears and he forgot what he wanted to say and kinda melted from pleasure on Shen Wei’s lap.
Ma Gui repeated his assurance that it shouldn’t take more than a day or two, but Zhao Yunlan stopped listening again. Shen Wei’s hand was still stroking his fur. Zhao Yunlan sighed with pleasure and concentrated very hard on not purring, because that definitely would be too embarrassing in all this already embarrassing scenario.
Shen Wei’s hand travelled under Zhao Yunlan’s chin. Mmm, that was very nice... And damn it, he couldn’t resist purring after all. He heard Da Qing snickering in the background. Well, at least I know he will forget about all this, Zhao Yunlan thought somewhat gleefully. Shen Wei continued petting him and his hand was gentle. Zhao Yunlan yawned. He curled in a more comfortable position on Shen Wei’s lap half-closing his eyes in bliss. Yeah, he was a cat and it sucked. But ok, maybe staying like that for a day or two wouldn’t be all bad.