Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Jerking off a coworker wasn't in your job description but that didn't stop you from getting the assignment.

The subject was notoriously difficult to work with and generally crude and offensive.

Frankly? He was a giant pain in the ass.

But you had a job to do. You and the other bastards who they'd roped into this. Mostly unpaid interns and people who had been demoted.

You had the 'honor' of being requested specifically.

You had no idea why. Probably a sick prank from one of the HR reps. They'd had it in for you ever since you'd reported Steven in the cloning labs for having some... Encounters with some of the clones.

In the middle of the break room.

During lunch.

In front of a wall-sized window.

On family visiting day.

Even they couldn't ignore that pr and memory wipe nightmare.

You reported for duty and were immediately ushered into a room.

"Welcome collection team." An Easter island fellow was in charge, addressing the lot of you, "I'm Andrew and I'll be your trainer for this exercise."

"We need a trainer?" Asked one of the guys, "I mean how hard can it be? It's just-" he mimicked a wanking motion eliciting a mixture of chuckles and groans from the group.

"There's style and finesse to it." An older fellow in the back said, "Bit more than just a quick wank."

"Harvey is right. So, let's watch a training video!" Andrew said it with as much false cheer as possible.

"Do we have to?"

"For legal reasons, yes. Yes, you do."

What came next was the longest hour of your life.

A demonstrational video which Played out as part giant mushroom sex Ed and part softcore porn.

Complete with tips, hand motions, suggested approaches, And warnings about the nature of the fluid you'd be handling which could have a wide range of effects such as hallucinations due to containing psilocybin. It varied based on exposure and amount of ingestion but it was absolutely possible to end up tripping if you were exposed. You didn’t question why anyone would have ended up INGESTING this on the job. This place was full of people who made dubious life choices.

He was safe enough in the office. You'd even seen him touch his coworkers.

But the... Amounts you would be working with were significantly more than average.

Great.

Fantastic.

Dangerous, weird, and absolutely an HR violation...

Or it would be if you weren't forced to sign an agreement with a laser sight trained on you.

After that was done you were given a hazmat suit.

You'd been told it was primarily a safety precaution because of the amount of fluids you'd be handling.

It still felt weird climbing into what, for the purposes of this event, was basically a body-sized condom.

You weren't a prude, far from it, but working at this place meant learning about a Lot of Weird Sex Stuff.

And not weird sex stuff you particularly wanted to know.

You had been down to learn about horny aliens and weird sex gadgets but you really didn't need to know everywhere JFK stuck his dick in the white house. 

The answer was literally everywhere. There was not a single JFK dong-free area in the building.

You felt like you wanted to bathe in hand sanitizer after finding that out.

Kinda felt like that right now too.

You followed the rest of your team through the corridors until you reached the resting quarters of the subject.

Myc.

The door opened to reveal him already in his tank. It was a basic glass cylinder with ports around the base for his tendrils to stick out through.

"'Bout time you guys showed up. I have a massive case of blue balls after that last session." He shook his head, "Some people just have weak stomachs."

You glanced at Harvey and he chuckled, "Fella didn't realize what he was getting into. Missed the training video."

"Oh…"

"Alright," Harv nodded to you, "You and me on prep.

"Prep?" You echoed.

"This is a two part exercise." He replied, "First we-"

"First two of you warm me up and when I'm good and ready the rest jump in so Cognito can get as much of my sweet, sweet juice as possible." 

Was he going to talk this much through the whole thing?

He leaned towards you, "Yeah, I'm a talker."

Great…

Harv took up position on one side of the tank, gesturing for you to go to the other.

God… why did you have to be on the warm up part of the team?

"Don't be shy, they don't bite."

A blue tentacle was extended to you through one of the portholes.

Reaching out, you took it in hand, trying to think of the training video suggestions.

As your hand closed around it you felt a shiver run through the appendage.

A reminder that this was not only attached to a living, sentient creature but also that you were functionally handling its dick.

Well... Best to get started.

Harvey was apparently a pro at this. You watched him masterfully executing the moves shown in the vid.

Okay well...

You ran your hand along the... tentacle? Stem? Trying not to think about the nature of what you were doing 

This was no different than harvesting a crop or milking a cow-

Except cows didn't moan sexually while being milked.

"That's it... Fuck yeah."

Oh god... He was going to talk during this too?!

"Hey Harv, little faster?"

"Sure."

"Ohhhhh yes, perfect."

You tried mimicking Harvey’s movements. It was a bit more complicated than you expected. Then again you hadn't entirely factored in the combo of gloves and lube being an issue.

This would be a lot easier if you could just use your hands.

It kept slipping loose and you almost thought it was on purpose. You wouldn't put it past Myc to pull some shit like that. You'd heard stories. Everyone had.

"Hey, new kid, if you can't keep a hold on it then call in a replacement!" The bulb that functioned as his head turned to you.

You could see some of your fellows chuckling at your error.

Well... Like fuck were you going to bow out now. You'd never live failing to give a hand job down. You could practically hear the jokes already.

With a huff, you threw down your gloves and rolled up your sleeves.

There were some minor sounds of surprise and protest from your colleagues but you know what?

Fuck it.

This would go faster this way.

You grabbed the stem, possibly a little too roughly, and began stroking.

"Oooh ho ho someone's mad!" He teased.

You ignored him, putting your focus on milking the juices from the tentacle in your hands.

"That's hilarious. You really that worried about your reputation?"

You moved faster, trying some of the moves Harvey was doing. You were definitely more rough with him than the others but he wasn't objecting so..

"Well, well, someone likes the rough stuff. Kinky…”

You were going to strangle this mushroom.

"Doing a pretty good job strangling me already, aren't cha?"

You glared up at him through your mask.

He broke off into a moan as you sped up.

"Ohh yeah... Fuck yeah... Like that"

Stupid job, stupid Steven, stupid HR...

Stupid irritating mushroom.

You would need to disinfect yourself thoroughly after this. You didn't want this stuff on your skin any bit longer than it had to be…

He was gasping, moaning, tendril trying to twist and wriggle in your hands.

It was then that you noticed it...

Between the moans and the movement, you were horrified to realize-

You were getting turned on by this...

Oh... Oh god...

Wait-

You looked up at him, horror running through your veins.

Did he know?

Surely he would be mocking the hell out of you if he did. Right…?

"Keep it up, new kid, daddy's close."

Ugh... Daddy? Really?

You gripped the tentacle harder, giving it a twist as he was starting to cry out.

Your twist was like kinking a garden hose, you watched as the bulge of fluid build-up grew a bit. It didn't look all that different from some sort of glowing water balloon. He squirmed whining for a second then spasming.

"F-FUCK ME!"

At that you untwisted it, watching as copious amounts of fluid drained into the bucket.

He was panting... Somehow. You had no idea how breathing worked for these things.

You went back to the customary milking method. Now that it had started he would continue to leak for a while.

He leaned against the glass inside his tank, seemingly spent.

And you tried to push away how hot your mind was finding it.

Maybe he was fucking with your head? Could they do that? Could the fluid do that?

Fuck, you had no idea…

What the fuck was wrong with you?

The process took a while but thankfully the subject was quiet. 

Harv told you going without gloves was against protocol but you shrugged him off. If psilocybin was the active ingredient then you doubted you'd have issues if it was just on your skin. The stuff generally needed to be ingested.

When you were finished being processed and your hazmat suit returned, you made your way to the office showers. You felt like you needed one after all that.

During lunch, you had gotten take out and we're bringing it back to your office when you nearly ran into the fucking mushroom again.

"Watch where you're going, some people are trying to walk here!" He paused.

Please don't recognize me please don't recognize me-

Shit, wait, he can read minds.

"I know you! Where do I recognize you from? Ohhhh you were on the JO squad!"

You were determined to ignore him but what he said next made you freeze in your tracks. A tentacle pressed to your brow, glowing pink.

"I'd recognize those filthy thoughts anywhere."

Fuck.

"Thaaaaat's right." He chuckled as you batted the stem away. "I've been inside your head.~ Why do you think everyone wears gloves?"

You stayed silent, glaring at him.

"What? You keep looking at me like that I'm going to take it as an invitation to a hate fuck."

"Oh fuck off."

"We can. Or fuck on. By the way," he moved to walk past you, leaning in for a moment, "Your brain and my dicks have something in common."

You looked at him, disgusted but also wondering what the fuck he mean-

"They both like denial ."

O h.

Your face flooded with heat and you swiftly walked to your office.

"Call me!~"

You sat at your desk, burying your face in your hands.

A lot of people in the office had dealt with mushroom duty. It was weird and awkward and honestly given the number of sex toys in the world? Probably unnecessary.

But it was part of working at Cognito Inc. sure you got to disappear people, meet actual cryptids, and play with tech most civilians wouldn't see released in their lifetime...

But you also had things like mushroom duty and dealing with Karen from the clone department.

And knowing the world around you was under constant surveillance.

It wasn't unusual to have interest in non-humans here. Alison from the media department had a Reptoid wife, for instance. There'd been a baby shower a few months back with an office party since her wife was expecting. You remembered something about parthenogenesis being mentioned.

But why, out of all the non-humans here, did it have to be the god damn mushroom?

Why not Mr. Mothman? He was sweet.

Or that one guy, Clawson, the reptoid in accounting.

Hell, you'd even take Sasquatch over this…

But no, no, your brain had to get the hots for a dude that didn't even have a face .

You pinched the bridge of your nose.

He was such an asshole.

You blamed the pretty colors and the tentacles. You had a soft spot for both. Him being an egotistical druggie dudebro was not your norm…

And… well… if you were being completely honest with yourself…

Fucking with his orgasm had been really satisfying.

And really hot.

"They both like denial."

You sighed, running your hands down your face.

That was probably another reason. The idea of taking him down a peg was way too alluring.

You shook your head, pushing it out of your mind to try focusing on paperwork.

This was NOT going to happen.

It was a BAD IDEA.

…

Who were you kidding? You worked for Cognito Inc.

Your life was just a long series of Bad Ideas.

Goddammit.

Next week when you got your assignment you nearly got into a fight with scheduling.

But in the end?

You lost.

Which was how you found yourself back in Myc's rooms with the rest of the team.

He leaned over toward you, "Well, well, look who it is. Didn't think we'd see you around again."

You looked up at him, "I was apparently requested ."

"Oh, gee well I wonder who could have possibly done that." He was catty about it, trying to rile you.

Don't let him get under your skin. This is a job. Get it done and go.

"So angry! Tell me, are you mad because you think I'm hot or mad because you have to share?"

You rolled your eyes, making sure the buckets were ready. The rest of the team had noticed his behavior. You heard the chuckles behind you.

Stupid fucking jackass mushroom-

"Or maybe you're just mad that I'm getting more than you.~"

Okay. That's it.

Abruptly you strode over to him, seizing one of the tentacles roughly.

He let out a low moan and tipped his head down to you.

"Fuck!" He yelped, "Not even gonna buy me dinner first?"

"You're going to behave yourself, got it?" You growled.

"Ooo roleplay! Are you supposed to be a sex cop?"

You gripped the tentacle tighter and he hissed, "Ey watch it! JR isn't going to like you milking me dry..." He leaned in, voice coy, "but I certainly will.~"

"Keep that up and I'll make sure to stop before anything gets milked." You snapped.

Myc shuddered slightly, "That a threat or a promise?"

Some of your coworkers exchanged glances and you realized just how uh... public this was.

Your heart was racing and you told yourself it was because you were angry. You definitely weren't turned on by the mushroom or his kinks-

"Hey, Harv?" He leaned towards the man, "Think you could take the rest of the crew outside? Me and new kid here need to talk "

Harv paused looking at you, "You good with that?"

Gritting your teeth, you nodded, "Sure."

After a bit of organization and a lot of curious glances, the others left.

Immediately the mushroom looked up, "Computer, lock the doors."

Then he turned to you, "You going to keep teasing me with that grip of yours?"

You hadn't realized just how tight the grip on the tentacle had become. You held it for a second or two more before releasing him.

He hissed, the edge of his cap pressed to the wall of the glass tube.

"Okay, so what do you wanna talk about?" You asked, crossing your arms.

"The elephant in the room. You," he pointed for emphasis, "Wanna fuck me ."

"What?! No, I don't!"

"Oh please, it's all you've been thinking about since the last session. Don't try to deny it."

"I absolutely will-"

A stem thrust out, wrapping around your wrist, "Yeah? Prove it. Let me read your mind directly."

"What does that mean?"

"Take off the stupid helmet."

You hesitated for a moment, then you calmed your mind and removed the helmet.

A tendril settled on your brow and you fought to keep the ideas out of your head. Garbage noise, that's what you needed-

"Crazy frog, how very millennial of you. Look, replaying a dumb song and picturing puppies isn't gonna do squat. I can see all the stuff underneath."

You pulled away and he pulled one tendril back through the port, using it to lean against the tank wall in a very smug fashion.

This mushroom had no right to be this smug.

"So, tentacles and orgasm denial huh? Not as kinky as I expected but I can work with that."

Your face burned, "Shut up, I'm just here to do my job."

"The first time? Maybe. But you came back for more.~"

Frustrated, you shot back, "I was doing my job and you had to go and make it weird ."

"Don't kid yourself. You made it weird the second you tossed off your gloves and started having freaky sex fantasies about me. I mean where I'm from, that's practically an invitation!"

Shit...

He was kind of right.

And you knew it, it had been in the training video...

"So, you wanna get freaky or not? Because I got five guys outside that could sub in instead." He paused and you saw a subtle shudder run through him, "But you're a hell of a lot better with your hands..."

"My hands?" You raised a brow, "Pretty sure Harv's better at it." 

"Harv's great, don't get me wrong. He gives me exactly what I need..."

His words from last week rose up in your mind.

Denial ...

It clicked for you then and you eyed him, "But you don't want exactly what you need, do you?"

"Maybe.~"

That was the flirtiest thing this asshole had said so far. 

Fuck.

Goddammit.

You were actually considering this.

Flirting and being rough had been way hotter than you expected...

Well...

Everyone got tired of this job... At least you could actually enjoy it ... Possibly.

Not to mention scratch 'get freaky with a non-human' off your bucket list.

You approached the tank, looking up at him, "How are we gonna do this?"

"What? I gotta teach you too?"

"Look, asshole," you grabbed one of the stems roughly, yanking it, "You're a six-foot-tall mushroom from the inside of the Earth, I don't know shit about how this works for you outside of jerking you off, got it?"

His response was a low, guttural moan, "Aw… fuck ... Yes. I get it."

"Good." You paused, letting him go, "Safeword is IRS."

You watched him shiver, "Yeah? Am I gonna need one?"

You seized two of the tentacles roughly, squeezing them, "I don't know, Myc, you tell me. "

"Fuck let me get out of this tank then-"

" No ." You gave the stems a hard squeeze, "Not until I tell you too."

"Weeeell someone's being really cocky- ah!!" He squirmed as you began to stroke him.

"I'm sorry , do you have a problem with that?"

"N-no..." He panted.

Spare tendrils were forcing themselves through the portholes, using the friction of the movement to-

"Excuse me?" You said, reaching over to snatch one of the offending tendrils, "Did I give you permission to jerk off?"

"No..." His voice wavered.

"So what shouldn't you be doing?"

"Jerking off."

"Good, now are you going to pull that shit again?"

His tentacles stilled, "No, Mixter."

Ohhh fuck .

Well... Time to bite the bullet and accept it.

That had been incredibly hot .

"Good." You started stroking him again, smirking at him, "You're a bit of a brat, you know that?"

"You love it." He snarked back.

You hated that he was right.

Abruptly, you let him go. 

He whined, "Come oooon, it was getting good!"

You picked up a tendril, examining it.

Now, you'd watched the training vid, sure. But at some point, your eyes started to gloss over. It was an educational vid there was only so interesting it could be.

The appendage in your hand was a cornflower blue, slick, warm, and surprisingly strong.

Grabbing the tip, you looked it over.

Smooth flesh with a small slit.

You pressed it lightly, causing the slit to open more than you expected. Pale liquid beaded at the tip. 

"Just gonna admire it or you gonna do something with it?"

Curious, you ran your finger along the slit.

He lit up, literally, leaning inside the tank to catch his breath.

"Well... That's interesting..." You purred.

The opening was certainly large enough to take your finger. Though you thought it best to start smaller.

You pressed inward with your pinkie.

You watched him shudder.

"Good?"

"Ohhhh fuck yes ." He sounded needy, desperate.

Fucking hell that was hot.

You slipped your pinkie inside carefully, watching as he shuddered and squirmed. It was an odd sensation. It clung to you, the insides rippling against your finger as if trying to draw it in further.

"Hm... This could be one hell of a way to prevent you from cumming."

"Ah- ah! Fuck!"

You chuckled, "So... Why don't the handjob guys do this if it's so effective?"

"T-takes longer..." He managed, "And they're shit at it."

"That so?" You looked up at him, slowly moving your pinkie in and out of the slit.

Sounding a mushroom.

This day had certainly taken a turn.

"Fuck yes..." He moaned. 

Abruptly, you drew your finger away.

"God Dammit you fucking cock tease!"

You seized one of the tentacles roughly, "I'm sorry, what was that?"

"You just gonna keep jerkin’ me around?"

He sounded genuinely irritated.

You took some pride in that.

"More interesting than just being jerked off, isn't it?" You smirked.

"Fuck you." 

You smirked, letting him go.

"What- "

"I think you need to learn some manners before we get that far."

"What do you-"

You made your way over to the door, looking back over your shoulder at him.

"Oh, you sick son of a bitch." His voice was filled with frustration and excitement.

You smirked, "You love it."

Opening the door you waved to Harvey, "You guys can take it from here."

With that, you strode out the door, riding high on having shown the asshole up.

Taking an early lunch, you made a trip back to your place. You had some pressing business you had to handle. Now .

Locking your door, you broke out a toy from your bedside drawer.

After all that you absolutely had to get off. You could not go around work like this.

As you fucked yourself with the toy, one hand stroking your sex, you thought about the way he'd shuddered and moaned. The way he'd immediately fallen in line when you grabbed his tentacles.

He was such a fucking jackass about it. A complete brat…

Which would make fucking up his orgasms soooo much more satisfying.

The tone in his voice when you left…

God, you wanted to hear more of that.

Fuck…

You thought of him crying out when you'd kinked his tentacle that first session and your body seized, shaking and pulsing as you came.

Oh fuck...

That was amazing.

You sighed, staring up at your ceiling.

Well… if you were going to do this then you should probably at least make some plans. You wouldn't want to be caught unprepared should the opportunity arise…

You were going to need to rummage through your bedside drawer. You had some things that might make things interesting.

When you came back from lunch you made your way to your office, coffee in hand and body at ease. On the way there you heard someone call your name. Turning you found yourself looking at Harv.

Shit… had you fucked things up?

"Hey, I have no idea what you did but we might have to add you to the team permanently." Harv said, grinning, "That took no time."

Oh...

You felt a flush of pride at that and also... Almost painfully aroused.

Goddammit. You'd just sorted this.

"Maybe… I don't know…" you said awkwardly. It was one thing to be kinky with the asshole in private but with an audience…

"Think about it. You two have chemistry. Might be just what we need."

You snorted, "Yeah, right."

"What? I've never seen him shut up that fast."

Oh…

"Guess I'd need a plaque for my office. Professional Mushroom Wrangler."

"Well the JO squad would be happy to have you."

You eyed him and he chuckled, "The Jerk Off squad. The regulars have jackets."

He tapped a patch on his shoulder emblazoned with a JO.

Oh god, you thought that had been a joke.

"We actually work with a few different creatures here."

You stared at him, "...what… why?"

"Lots of reasons, you got collection like Myc, you have some that need it or they might explode, some trying to repopulate that need assistance-"

"Okay, okay, I get the picture." You waved a hand, "I don't know if that's really my thing."

"You can be a specialist."

"... Wait you actually have those?"

He nodded, "My buddy Tina, she specializes in Sasquatch collection for repopulation purposes."

"You would think I'd stop being surprised after working here this long but what the hell ?"

He laughed, "Hey, it's an important job. We serve some vital functions here."

You looked at him, dubious. The man obviously had a passion for his job… which was questionable but admirable… you guessed.

"Think about it and get back to me." He said with a chuckle.

You did think about it… for about thirty seconds before deciding that's was just… too awkward even for you.

On that note, you made your way back to your office.

You were halfway through the finance report for the office when your door banged open.

Revealing a tall dayglo mushroom.

He pointed at you with a tentacle accusingly, "That was fuckin low ."

"Oh?" You chuckled.

"Yeah, 'Oh!' That was a fuckin cocktease and you know it!"

Getting up, you made your way past him, shutting the door and drawing the blinds. Turning to face him, you leaned in, running a hand along the slender stem that amounted to his torso, "I thought you said you liked denial."

"Fuck off!" He snapped.

You gave him a look."When and where, bitch?"

"My place, tonight." He shot back, irritated.

It was decided then…

Relaxing, you ran your hand up over the stem to the bright orb that lit up when he spoke. Then you gently brushed your fingertips along the soft gills above it.

"On one condition."

He huffed, "What?"

"You tell me what you want."

"I want to fuck , stupid!"

"Details."

"I want to come until I can't anymore, and trust me that takes a while. "

You chuckled, "I don't think you're telling me everything you want…"

"Oh? Like what? My secret nurse kink?" He gestured sarcastically and you seized the tendril roughly.

"I meant what you want from me ."

There was a pause and he huffed, "I want you to boss me around, play rough, there, you happy?"

You gentled a bit, running your fingers along his stem in what you hoped was a soothing motion, "Yeah, actually. Are you?"

"Happy about being bossed around and given a case of blue balls?" He asked bitterly.

"Myc."

He paused. You hadn't really said his name much. It was usually insults when you had interacted.

"Seriously, are you okay with this?"

"If you let me get off? Yeah."

You weren't sure how, maybe it was a shift in posture or the dulled edge of his tone, but you believed him.

You chuckled, "I promise, it'll be worth the wait."

He shuddered with your words, "I'm holding you to that."

Playfully, you grazed your thumb over the slit at the end of the tendril.

He shivered and pulled the tendril back from you, "You really going to pull more of that shit?"

With a smirk, you shrugged, "You seem to like it."

"You're right and it upsets me."

You laughed then paused, realizing the time, "Oh fuck. I have a meeting to get to."

"... The workplace safety review?"

"... Yeeeees?"

Wait…

The meeting was mandatory for all staff. You were taken in groups by shift and as luck would have it the mushroom was sitting across from you.

The meeting was boring by Cognito standards. Funny, especially given the greatest hits clips of workplace accidents set to music, but still not riveting.

Sighing, you leaned back in your chair.

You were going to fuck the mushroom…

How the hell had your life gotten here?

Your thoughts drifted back to him staring at you in shock as you left him hanging during a session. Fuck that has been hot…

You glanced over at him, running through every kinky thought you had of him. 

Denying him, making him cum, plugging his tentacles so he couldn't get off.

Across from you, you could see him tense. 

Wait…

Ohhhh my god. He could read your mind, that meant...

You had no idea how a mushroom could give you such a distinct sensation of being glared at but he did.

This was too easy.

You countered by imagining slipping a vibe into one of those sensitive slits.

You could see one stem gripping the edge of the table.

Oh, you fucking loved this.

You imagined him, a vibe in each tendril, you stroking them slowly, idly, as if you had all the time in the world...

He shuddered.

And if he got too close, well, you'd just take them out.

Could he hold more than one load at a time? If you kept him plugged through one orgasm could you work on the next one without milking him?

What would happen if only one of the stems was left open, the rest plugged, forcing the fluid out one only...

You could see him looking at you and gave him an innocent smile.

With that, you got up, heading into the lounge for some coffee.

You hadn't even gotten the pot started before you found yourself turned and pushed against the wall by tentacle-like stems.

He was... Surprisingly strong for a mushroom.

"What the hell?" He snapped.

"What? You like reading people's minds. I thought I'd just give you something entertaining to think about."

He huffed, "To answer your questions you fucking cock tease, yes, I can hold more than one at a time but it gets kinda painful. And keeping one unplugged makes it all come out harder and faster."

"Do you like those ideas?"

"Fuck yes I do but you ever going to follow through?"

You chuckled, "Maybe. Guess you'll find out tonight, won't you?"

"You two okay in here?" 

You looked over to see Brett standing worried in the doorway.

"We're fine!" You said cheerfully.

And with that you ducked out the door past him, leaving the mushroom to come up with whatever excuse he could think of.

As you took your seat back at the conference table you couldn't help but smile to yourself.

This was fun.

He'd shot you a text with an address after the meeting. His address, you guessed?

It wasn't a long trip but when you got there you were kind of surprised.

A three-story brownstone in Alexandria was not what you were expecting.

And it only gave you more questions. How did he get from here to Cognito without being spotted? Did he own the place? How did that work legally? Did he have some kind of human persona he had his legal stuff under? How much were they paying him that he could afford this place?

You knocked on the door awkwardly.

What if this was some kind of prank?

You'd kill him. That's what. With your bare fucking hands.

The door opened to reveal a middle-aged woman.

Shit.

"Ah… hello… I'm here to see Myc?"

She looked at you with a blank expression for a moment, "No solicit-" she spasmed slightly and then a familiar snarky voice came out of her mouth, "Get in here. Veronica's been on the fritz."

You ducked inside, shutting the door behind you.

"Welcome to Chateau du Myc."

Ohhh my god what a moron.

He emerged from the room past the foyer, a drink in hand, "Veronica, lock the door and go charge, doll."

The woman by the door did as she was told, disappearing into another room.

"What was-"

"Robotic answering service." He shrugged, "useful when you look like this."

"I was wondering about that."

"When it's not her, it's Andre."

"You live with Andre?"

"No, but he comes over. JR forbid us from living together after we trashed the last place. It is amazing the number of people who show up to a party when the goodie bags have free cocaine."

Oh…

He waved for you to follow him.

The place was bigger than you expected. Tidier too… at least downstairs. The place seemed to get more chaotic as you ascended the stairs.

The aesthetics became a mish-mash of refined sensible furniture mixed with a display of bongs, blacklight posters, and pinups.

It was like a frat had moved into a nice family home and was slowly converting it.

He led you up another flight to the top floor, past a den that had clearly been converted to some kind of man cave by him and Andre, to a door at the end of the hall. He opened it, leading you inside.

"Seriously?" You asked.

He waved a tendril, "Just take it all in."

You thought the house was eccentric. The room really just… exemplified it.

Hardwood floors, some kind of light system attached where a normal fixture would go, more blacklight posters bullshit, minifridge, a sex swing, drug and porn paraphernalia, etc but the real ridiculous centerpiece had to be the bed.

A circular, purple, bed.

You took a breath.

Okay, you could work with this.

The place looked like a Spencer's had thrown up on it but whatever.

You looked over at him, "Decided you don't need the tank tonight?"

"Not if you're gonna cocktease me like that again." He replied, setting down his drink.

"... Are you pouting?"

You'd never known a mushroom could look petulant before but you sure did now.

"No! I just don't like being jerked around!"

You chuckled, "Could have fooled me ~ and hey, I did say it would be worth it."

He paused, noticing the bag in your hand, "...Ohhohoho! Sex toys? Well, aren't you a freaky little fucker."

"If you haven't figured that out by now I don't know what to tell you." You smirked, "So, what now?"

"You tell me, Mx. I'm-In-Charge"

Your heart rate quickened at that. There was a challenging tone to his voice, a tone that masked something deeper. An eagerness you were excited to explore.

"Before we start, we need to cover body rules."

His tone flattened, "Rules? Seriously?"

"I don't know how you work. Last thing I wanna be known for at work is the person who fucked the incredibly valuable subterranean mushroom to death. "

"Thinking pretty highly of your skills there, aren't you?"

You chuckled, "Maybe, but it's still important. I need to know what I shouldn't do. What hurts and what doesn't "

"Alright alright, I've done BDSM before I get it." He waved a tendril, "Don't fuck with my face."

You paused, looking at him for a long moment.

He gave an exasperated sigh gesturing to the glowing orb below his cap, "You know this light bright here? Yeah. Don't fuck with it. "

"What about touching?"

His body shifted, stance becoming more guarded, wary. "Touching’s... okay."

"Kissing?"

You knew that he lit up a pink color when he spoke but the deep purple that he cast as you said that was new.

"Yeah, that's fine."

 You approached him with a smile.

"Okay and here?" You trailed your fingers along his main stem.

You felt him shiver under your fingers, "Yeah..."

"Aaand up here?" You brushed your fingers over his gills and slightly along the brim of his cap.

"Fuck yes..."

"And of course the tentacles." You said, chuckling.

"They're not tentacles. They're flagella." He huffed, “Or stems."

"Okay. And... this?" You gestured to the swelling at his base that the flagella sprouted from.

"Yeah."

"So basically the rule is not the face." you laughed softly, "I can work with that. I was pretty rough with you before, was that okay?"

"Hell yes , it was." He said, "I haven't been handled like that in a long time."

"Okay, so you definitely like rough."

"I mean don't cut or burn me or anything, for my good or yours. Our blood doesn't exactly play nice with human skin."

"Okay, I'm rough but I'm not that rough." You chuckled, "The safe word from earlier okay for you?"

"Yeah. Can we hurry it up already? You've been jerkin’ my chain all day, Daddy's impatient."

You snorted, "Daddy? Really?"

"What? It's hot."

You rolled your eyes, "How can you be one of the most interesting people in the whole company and still be such a basic bitch?"

"Hey!" He peeked up, gesturing dramatically to himself, "This bitch is far from basic!"

Okay." You smirked, "Now... You can touch me anywhere too. Try not to, I don’t know, overdose me or something?" You paused, "If someone swallows your fluid..."

"Biocerebrate. I mean you could , but you'd trip balls big time." He leaned in, voice conspiratorial, "I'd much rather cover you in it anyway."

You felt your cheeks heat up at that. He cackled, "What? There's a reason Bukkake is one of my favorite genres."

"Okay... Well, not the eyes and try to minimize the hair?"

"I make no promises but I'll try."

"How reasonable of you." you chuckled.

"What? I'm a mushroom, not a monster."

"Alright, you ready?"

His tone was filled with confidence, "I’m always ready."

"Good." You grabbed his primary stem, practically dragging him across the room.

"Hey-"

You flung him toward the bed. Not violently but fast enough for him to get the idea of what you wanted.

Slowly, he sank onto the bed, flagella dangling over the edge.

You got down on the floor, opening your bag of toys.

The first item you pulled out made him shiver.

Sounding wasn't something you normally did much with partners. Never had anyone into it. But it was clear this was something that would work particularly well on him given the anatomy.

You'd brought options though. Sounds, beads, plugs of varying sizes. You weren't sure what he could accommodate. 

"So, how does this normally work with your kind?" You asked, deliberately taking your time to lay out the toys.

It was a tease but you knew he'd love it.

"Thought you would have studied up on this."

"Details are above my security level." 

"It's not complicated." He held up two flagella, the tip opened on one. They could definitely accommodate more than a finger. He slid another flagella into the first, moving them together with a moan.

"So it doesn't hurt you having things plugged?"

"No. Fuck, come on why are you still teasing me?"

"Well for one because it's going to make you come way harder, two because I need to know so I don't hurt you, and three because it's fun."

"You really are a sick bastard." You didn’t miss the undercurrent of excitement to his words.

"Soooo plugging things...."

"You can fucking plug them just make sure I'm able to get the load out by the end of it!" He snapped, tendrils thrusting together impatiently.

Reaching out, you gripped the two flagella, slowly pulling them apart from one another, "I asked for a demonstration, I didn't say you get to get off yet."

"Oh fuck you!"

"We'll see if you're still saying that when I've been edging you for a while."

He tensed slightly, you could swear you heard his breath catch.

Difficult to tell with a mushroom though.

You reached out, taking a small stem in hand. He shivered, head down, watching you.

Holding up the tendril, you selected a sound. A medium-thickness metal rod, rounded at the end.

Carefully, you pressed the tip to the slit at the end of the tendril. He took it easily, gasping as you worked it inside.

"Ohhhhh fuck..."

Idly, you moved the rod in and out, rubbing the inner walls of his flagella. The effect was intense. Way more intense than the regular hand job sessions were. No snarky quips this time, just moans and gasps. He trembled, his other tendrils gripped the edge of the bed tightly...

Until you drew another one toward you.

He let you take it, still watching attentively.

Picking up a plug, a rather thick one designed more for anal play, you pressed it to the willing slit.

The sound had gone in smoothly. With this, you met slight resistance. But that was fine.

You were more than patient.

You added lube to the toy, gently dipping it in and out of the slit, watching it expand to slowly stretch around the toy.

"Shit... Fuck- ah..."

You chuckled, "Hmmm glad I brought these along. After all, I don't exactly have back up with me and I'd hate for you to come and have it all go to waste."

He shuddered.

"Especially not if you want to empty it on me." You murmured, eyeing him.

" Christ …" he breathed, "Fucking hell..."

After several long moments, you were able to get the plug seated in the tendril in your hand.

Then you simply moved to the next one.

Each tendril was given a plug. Many took time to get properly anchored. You relished it, watching as he shook and hunched over. The sounds he made were desperate and needy and oh fuck you loved it.

By the time you were down to the last one, he was a mess.

"Fuck, yes. Yes. God, shit, damn, don't stop..."

You had no plans on it.

All flagella firmly plugged but one, you began to sound him. One hand worked the sound on the inside, the other held him, jerking him in slow steady strokes, making him extra aware of the metal rod holding him open and plugging him up.

"You like being milked, huh?"

"Yes... God, yes!"

"This better than the usual?"

"S-so much better."

He squirmed as you teased him, writhing and panting.

When he began to get close you withdrew the sound.

"SON OF A BITCH! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!"

You chuckled. The one free flagella with the sound removed was already leaking but not enough to be a full orgasm.

"I'm sorry , did you think I was going to let you come already?"

His voice was filled with bitter acceptance, "You are a sadistic fucker."

"Oh trust me, I could be worse." There was a tiny tremor through him at that.

You took the flagella in your hand, running your finger over the slit, teasing it, playing with it.

In doing so, you noticed something.

There was a benefit to him functionally having dicks for hands...

With plugs in them, he was damn near useless with them. It was like putting booties on a dog or cat.

It was two for one. A toy and a restraint.

"Mmmm..." You looked down at the tendril in your hand.

As he'd gotten more worked up it had swelled. Not significantly but enough that you could feel the difference. You supposed it made sense, erogenous zones did that with humans, why not sentient mushrooms.

"Ohhh my god, less science more milking!" He snapped.

Still reading your mind.

Well then.

You jerked him forward by the stem in your hand, stroking him roughly, "Yeah? You want to be milked?"

"Fuck, yes goddammit come on!"

You smirked "You wanna cum?"

"Yes! Fucking shit , you know I do!"

You let him go and sat back with a sweet smile.

"Say please."

"Oh fuck you!"

"Alright then, I guess we'll see how long you can deal." You grabbed the tendril again, slowly sinking the sound back into its slit.

"A-ah! Fuck, no, wait..." He tried to catch his breath, "Fuuuuuck. Oh..."

You kept the sound moving torturously slowly, watching him squirm.

"You know if you wanna cum, you just gotta say one thing.~"

"Piss off!”

"Not quite." You chuckled, "I told you you'd have to learn some manners."

He whined and you continued teasing him slowly with the sound, watching as he twisted and shuddered.

"You know... There's no reason only one of us should have fun."

"What-"

You let him go and began to undress, slowly methodically.

"Now we're talking!" He said with excitement.

You smirked, "What? You think this is for you? " Sinking back down to the floor you retrieved a dildo, placing it under you.

He froze when he realized what you were doing, his voice flat with disappointment, "You're an ass."

You rode down on the toy with an eager moan, "Just because you can't get off doesn't mean I can't.”

You seized his tendril again, moving the sound in time with the roll of your hips as you fucked yourself on the toy.

"Oh, you f-fucking evil bitch."

You moaned, "Sorry, I can’t hear you over how fucking good this feels… ah!"

Frustrated sounds poured from him and it only made you more enthusiastic about riding the toy. You kept yourself focused though, even as your own orgasm was impending. The second you thought he might cum you'd stop moving the sound, simply holding the tendril while he watched you fuck yourself.

When the orgasm hit, you gasped, leaning forward, one hand on the bed, the other still firmly gripping him.

"Fuck! Come on!" He practically begged.

As you rode out of the waves of pleasure you smirked up at him, breathless, "What do you say?~"

"Okay, fine, please for the love of god milk me!"

You chuckled, taking the tendril with the sound in hand and once again beginning to slide the sound in and out.

"Fuck yes. Fuck yes. Come on, oh god, oh fuc-AH!" As he started to cry out you twisted the tendril below the sound, preventing the fluid from going anywhere.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuck! Please!"

Taking your sweet time, watching the tentacles swell with fluid, stretching the base of them, you removed the sound and untwisted it.

"Fuck me!" He cried out, breaking off into guttural moans as fluid shot out of the flagella in your hand. It spattered against your chest, ran down your thighs, and the sight of it seemed to work him up even more. You started milking the cum from him slowly now that the first burst had passed the other tendrils twisted, swollen with unreleased fluid.

"F-FUCK come on, faster -"

You gave the tendril a hard squeeze, making him yelp, "No. I set the pace. You're lucky I let you cum at all."

He gasped, "You really are a fucking jackass."

"Am I?" You picked up another plug and began slowly sinking it into the one free tendril, "Because it's about to get so much worse for you."

He shook, crying out as you plugged the only outlet he had for release. There was some distention in his base and tendrils. He panted, falling back on the bed, "Fuck..."

It sounded almost defeated... But not quite.

You picked up another weapon from your arsenal. A vibrator.

He looked down at you and the second he saw what was in your hand he tried to back up on the bed. You grabbed his main stem, holding him still, "No."

There was a pause and before you continued, you reached out, gently running your fingers down the side of his 'face', "You hanging in there?"

"Screw you." he spat back.

"Myc..." You gave him a look.

"I'd be better if you kept going." He hissed.

With a chuckle, you climbed onto the edge of the bed.

Picking up one of his plugged flagella you put the vibrator to the plug and turned it on high.

"Fuck shit Jesus Christ oh fuckfuckfuckfuck!" He writhed and arched, his body shaking, "Fuck you gotta let me cum please fucking Christ you gotta let me cum."

"Do I now?"

"Fuck please, please! Ah!" He cried out arching, and you could see the base of his flagellum swell further.

Taking one of the tendrils in hand, you worked the plug out. The pressure helped and the second it was free you were drenched, greenish-blue fluid draining down your body.

"Good boy..." You chuckled, "Very good...."

He twitched, gasping and you took one of the other tendrils, removing the plug from it, and working the remaining loads out of him.

"A-ah.. ahh oh god.. fuck..."

With one hand still milking him, you reached out for the vibe, running it up the other unplugged flagella.

He seized, "Fuckfuckfuckfuck!"

"Hmmmm... I teased you all day. Maybe I should make it up to you by making sure you're completely drained..."

That made him arch and cry out, further spurts of fluid coming from the two unplugged tendrils.

If you didn't know better you would think he was having some kind of seizure from the way he twitched and spasmed.

The floor was going to be a mess…

Maybe if you did this again…

A thought came to mind and you smirked, "Maybe I can modify one of those milking machines… or a suction toy… then we wouldn't make as much of a mess."

Curious, you took the end of the freed stem and slipped the tip of the vibe inside.

"F-FUCK!"

"Hmm.." You ran your hand over where his tendrils were anchored to his body. It was slightly swollen and when you gently pushed on it you were rewarded with another spasm, cum rushing out around the vibe in your hand.

"You really are filled up aren't you?"

"Fuckyes."

Gently, your slid hand over the sort of paunch his limbs were anchored to, feeling fluid moving beneath the surface. You dragged your hand down, squeezing it down into the flagella and slowly emptying him with long, drawn-out pulls.

With his other tendrils blocked it wasn't hard to get the fluid moving out of the two freed ones.

Finally, he made a hissing sound, one of his tendrils grabbing your hand. He made a sound of discomfort and you noticed his flagella were looking a bit worse for wear. Almost as if they were drying up. The skin had gone rough and taut.

"Oh, shit." You said in alarm, "That looks painful."

"That's because it is." He gasped.

"Okay… let's get the rest of these out of you."

" Please ."

With a little extra lube, you were able to free the remaining plugs. Leaving him laying back on the bed, exhausted and leaking.

You looked him over, "Is there anything I can put on them to help?"

"I need water, a shot of vodka, and a cigarette." He gestured to the mini-fridge.

You slid off the bed, "Would ice help for the pain?"

"No, just need to rehydrate."

The mini-fridge was a mix of water and alcohol. Because of course, it was.

When you brought him the drinks you found him laying back, propped up on pillows, a cigarette sticking out from the lip of his cap.

He threw back the shot and then drank the water slowly.

You could tell he was drinking. Everything was being held up to the brim of the cap, but the mechanism by which he actually drank? You had no clue.

Carefully, you settled into the bed next to him, opening your own water, "You alright?"

"I will be when I replace all the liquid you squeezed out of me."

"Anything I can do to help?"

He looked at you in a way you were 100% sure was meant to be a side-eye, "You're going to help me into an early grave like this."

You shook your head, "No. The rough stuff’s done. I want to help you feel better."

"... Suspicious."

You laughed and, very carefully, leaned in to press a light kiss to the bright globe of his face.

"Seriously."

After a moment he sighed, "There's a tube in the bedside table."

You retrieved it. It was a rather nondescript tube of ointment of some kind.

"Just rub some of it into the ends.”

Stretching out next to him, you took one of his flagella in hand. He flinched slightly but you were gentle, rubbing ointment into the ends carefully. The improvement was immediate and it seemed like the relief was too. He relaxed but you noticed him watching you with interest.

When everything had been tended to, you capped the tube, leaning across him to put it on the bedside table.

There was a sharp smack across your ass that made you jump and you sat back glaring at him. He laughed, “What? You were the one presenting it.”

Rolling your eyes, you flopped back down next to him again.

“... Surprised you were so good at that. You always seem ready to tear them off,” he said idly.

Looking up at him you raised a brow, “Well… yeah? Aftercare’s a thing. And I can be gentle, jeez.”

“Coulda fooled me.”

Reaching up you patted the side of his face, “Maybe you’ll get to see more of that another time.”

“Maybe I’ll say no.”

“Hmmmm… you think so?” you smirked.

“Hell no.” he took a draw on his cigarette.

"So? Worth the wait?"

"Fuck yes..."

You laughed, looking over at him, "Didn't think you'd be that much of a bottom."

His head whipped around towards you, "It's called being a switch, bitch, get it right."

"Yeah? Cause that looked an awful lot like bottoming to me."

“Fuck off.”

“Already did, jackass.”

Amicable silence fell as the pair of you lay there watching wisps of smoke drift towards the ceiling.

“We should do this again.” he said abruptly, “That was the best lay I’ve had in a while.”

"Aren't you always bragging about how good at this you are?" You laughed, "I figured I'd be too amateur for you."

There was a bit of a pause before he turned his head to look at you, "You want some real shit?"

"Yeah?"

"Most people are more into using my flagella than getting me off and not just Cognito." He settled back on the pillows with a sigh, "Sex is great. I fuckin love it and I'm good at it. I'm just not always satisfied. Shit’s not the same with you monkeys."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I'm part of a hive cluster. Sex is practically conversation."

"... Wait, seriously?"

"Yeah. That isn't just cum it's like…" he gestured idly, "A way to exchange information. It's like a long conversation when you've had too many edibles."

You snorted.

"And it's with more than one person. Most of you are missing out."

"That why you like orgies?"

"Eh, one reason, yeah." He sounded a little dismissive. Not entirely like his usual snarky self.

You thought about it for a moment. You supposed having tentacles it made sense that he'd be considered the life of the party at an orgy. But in a way... that was sort of just using him as an elaborate sex toy...

"Bingo. You got there, kid... And they're not tentacles.”

You batted away the stem he'd draped over your head, wiping away a trail of fluid, "Oh come on in my hair?!"

He cackled, "What? You couldn't get enough earlier!"

"Oh my god." You rolled your eyes

After a moment or two you glanced at him, "So… what's different here?"

"You actually try?" He scoffed, "Look, handjobs only do so much. That's not really all we do. Like you can get there but it's not as satisfying…"

"Funny you don't like that given you like denial."

"That's different."

You lay together in an amicable quiet for a few moments as you processed this information.

Sex was a conversation for them. Something that happened in groups. How intimate was it? How intimate could it be?

You felt him tap your head with a flagella, "It's literally like mind-melding or some shit. You guys don't really have that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s fuckin hot reading what goes on in people’s heads when we’re going at it but it’s not the same thing cause it’s a one-way radio."

"So you basically just read each other’s minds?"

“That’s one way to put it.”

“I mean… people can think about all kinds of shit during sex. I mean, I’ve had sex, where all I could think is ‘god when is this going to be over’ or ‘oh god my leg is cramped’. So, I imagine that’s not always great.”

“Eh, it’s more than that.” he gestured, “And yeah, it’s intimate. Kinda more than mind reading.”

“Can you give me an example?”

"I don’t know! Shit! That’s like trying to explain what something sounds like to a deaf person!”

You paused, considering this.

Finally, he sighed, “It’s like knowing someone. Like… all of them at once. Good, bad, ugly.”

“Oh…”

"Yeah." He said, "Exactly. That’s one benefit of being with humans…”

“... What?”

“You can’t know me.”

Well… that was fucking heavy, Jesus.

“But I can know all about you .” he chuckled, “And that's why I know you jerked off to me today."

"What?!"

" Twice ."

He sounded so fucking smug.

"Jerk! Stop fucking going through my brain for shit like that!"

"Why? What are you gonna do about it?"

Ohhh the little challenge in his voice...

Reaching out, you seized a tentacle, twisting it slightly. You'd just told him the rough stuff was done, you didn't want to hurt him. 

"What was that?" he shuddered and you leaned over him, lips grazing the globe of his face, "You wanna say that again?"

He shivered, “Thought you were going to be gentle next time.”

“Last I checked it’s still the same night.” you countered.

His words came out in a faltering eagerness, "Fuck, that's hot..."

You smirked, "Yeah?"

"Fuck yes."

Tendrils began to stroke along your hip and you shivered.

“You sure you’re fine with thi-ohhhhh” you gasped as the open end of one of the tendrils suctioned onto your sex.

“I don’t know, are you?~ ”

“Fuck…”

“Well, yeah, what do you think we’re doing?”

“Shut up.” you shot back.

“Hmmm I don’t think I have to,” he said, a tendril coming up to wrap lightly around your neck, “Pretty sure you used up your quota for bossing me around. It’s my turn .”

Ohhhhh fuck…

That was hot.

You were pulled forward to your knees effectively straddling him.

A couple of the tendrils twisted around one another, butting against your entrance, the flagella on your sex kept it’s grip on you.

Reaching out, you put your hands on the headboard to steady yourself, “Ohhhh god…”

“I’ve been called that before.” he joked, the tentacles at your entrance teasing you.

“Asshole.” you chuckled.

“You love it.” 

Two tendrils were wrapped around your legs, steadying you, one was suctioned to your sex, another two were idly playing with your entrance, and the last one trailed down from your neck to loop around your waist. You shuddered, rocking your hips.

“You know, you’re getting off easy tonight.” he said, tightening his grip, “I'm still sore."

You shivered, "Yeah?"

"But trust me, next time? You're going first."

The tendrils teasing you pushed in and you tightened your hold on the headboard trying to rock your hips to drive him deeper.

It was useless. With the way he was wrapped around you and the flexibility of the stems inside you there was no way to push him deeper.

You whined.

"What? Not getting what you want? Gee, I wonder how that feels." He snarked, the suction on your sex amped up making your legs tense before pulling away from you.

"F-fuck!"

Your sex was exposed to air, hypersensitive from the level of suction he had been applying to it.

He chuckled, using the tip to stroke and tease at you, making you squirm.

Gasping, you found yourself burying your face in the soft surface of his cap. Fucking hell that was good…

You thought about how you'd fucked with him all day and wondered what that might be like if the roles were reversed.

The flagella around your waist slid up and down gently, an almost tender motion, as he answered your unspoken question, "You'd want to kill me by the end of it."

Fuck, you didn't know if you were ever going to get fully used to him reading your mind…

The tendrils inside pushed deeper, finding a spot in you that made your legs shake.

"Yeah?" You gasped, "You sure about that? You seemed pretty impatient."

"Damn right I was. You were being a fucking tease. But if I was doing it…"

You whined as the tendril suctioned to your sex again.

"Let's just say we wouldn't be confined to one room."

You felt your face heat up, thinking of the meeting earlier. He could probably reach you under the table. Or maybe he'd pull you into a storage closet somewhere.

He chuckled, "You're thinking too small. R&D has some really effective invisibility tech. I could fuck you in the middle of the foyer and no one would know if you kept your mouth shut."

Shit!

You trembled as he continued zeroing in on the spots that made your body just want to give out.

"Fuck, that's it …" he moaned, "You kept Daddy waiting all day so now it's time to pay up."

Omfg, Daddy again?

"Damn right, again." There was a practically evil chuckle to him, "Actually… I don't think you're going to get to come until you say it too."

"Oh fuck you!" You laughed.

Abruptly, the tendrils withdrew from you leaving you without stimulation. You yelled, your hips rolling of this own accord.

He laughed, "Oh, you thought I was joking? Sorry, let me laugh harder!"

You glared at him as he cackled, "Are you fucking serious?"

"As a heart attack." He squeezed you, "If you wanna come tonight you gotta say it. I think we'll add a please on top of that."

"Oh my fucking god."

The tip of a flagella barely brushed your sex, making you bite your lip, "F-fuck…"

The pair of tendrils worked their way back inside and you were blissfully stimulated again. 

"Ohh god, oh fuck yes…"

Your body tensed as he drew out the sensations. The one tendril around your waist slipped up to suction onto a nipple and you cried out, tensing.

Fuck, that felt good. Ohhh fuck…

The suction on your sex returned, stronger this time, riding the edge of overstimulating. Fuck, god you were going to-

Everything stopped and you cried out, legs shaking and nails digging into the headboard.

"Ah, ah, ah," his voice was filled with vindictive glee, "Not til you say the magic words."

Ohhh fuck…

After a moment, the tendrils returned to their motions, teasing, touching, the one at your nipple moved to the other, latching on.

"Fuck, you are trying to kill me."

"After today? You kinda deserve it."

You huffed, "You loved it."

"Aw," he said, his voice dripping with condescension, "Who's pouting now?"

"Shut up!"

He dug the tendrils into a particularly sensitive spot making you shake and cry out.

"I don't think I will."

The intense suction was back on your sex, driving you up a wall. You bucked to try to get him to go in harder but he refused to be rushed, taking his time.

You twisted, gasping, your head resting in his as you desperately tried to come.

"All you gotta do is say two little words." He chuckled.

"Fuck you."

"Wrong answer, hot stuff."

The tendrils withdrew again and you cried out in frustration.

"You ready to ask nicely? "

Oh, he sounded so fucking pleased with himself…

You hated how hot it was.

He chuckled, "I might be sore but I could do this all night, just warning you."

Ohhh God…

"Just two words…" he said, low and amused, "And you can come."

Gritting your teeth, you gave in, "Please, Daddy."

The tendrils were tending to you again but not nearly enough to make you come. He was playing with you, teasing you.

"Nah, you gotta say it like you mean it." As a point of emphasis, he applied suction to your sex, the tendrils inside driving home and making you tense.

"F-fuck! Please!"

"Please what?"

"Please, Daddy can I come?!"

He chuckled, tendrils finding their mark inside you, demanding and intense.

"Come for me."

You cried out as he amped up suction and movement, your body shaking. You were-

You muffled a scream against his cap, gasping and clinging to the headboard.

"That's it…" he kept moving. Dragging out the peak, making you come again and again until your legs were giving out.

"Oh-okay- I-"

You felt him withdraw before you even got to the point of needing the safe word, helping you lay back in bed, gasping for air.

"Was that so hard?" He mocked.

"Fuck off."

He chuckled.

Silence fell. Your body was slowly cooling, your breathing beginning to even. Several muscles hurt but you kinda expected that.

You were twitching, reveling in the delicious afterglow, eyes beginning to slip shut.

You lie there, drifting in and out of sleep.

The room smelled like petrichor and cigarettes.

"Fuck..." You finally managed to gasp.

There was a chuckle, "Oh good you're still alive, I don't have to turn in any paperwork."

You didn't even look up, you just flipped him the bird.

He laughed.

Reaching out, you tugged him over, your arm looped around his stem, "Shut up."

A tendril came to rest gently on your head.

"Glad to see I didn't completely scramble your brains."

"Mn."

You were gross and slick with one arm wrapped around a giant sentient mushroom and fuck you had never been more satisfied.

"Oh I'll have to add that to my RightSwipe: 'Never been more satisfied," a review from one of my many lovers."

You snorted, "I'd tell you to get out of my brain but I know it won't stop you."

"Sure as hell won't."

"... Do you have a shower in this place?"

"What? Don't wanna be seen doing the walk of shame?"

You huffed, "No, I'm just fucking drenched in mushroom cum."

There was a pause, "You know, you could just ask to stay the night "

You froze.

"Told ya, always in your head." He tapped your head with a tentacle 

"Fine. If you already know, what's the answer?”

His response sounded so self-satisfied, "Nah, I want you to ask. "

Heat flushed your face

"... Could I spend the night?"

"Sure thing, Hot Stuff. Shower’s in the back."

“...I’ll get on that when I can feel my legs again.”

He laughed, "Ohhh I'm gonna have fun with you."

The feeling was 100% mutual.

Chapter Text

Work, for most people, wasn't exactly the most exciting place to be. There was a reason it was referred to as things like the daily grind.

Your coworker, of course, had other ideas of what made work a grind as you found out when you entered your office that morning. 

Tentacles pinned you to your door. "Finally, was startin' to think you just weren't gonna show up."

You shuddered, feeling a tendril working to unbutton your pants, "What, you think I wouldn’t come to work just to avoid you?"

"Maybe. After all…" he leaned in, the edge of his cap brushing your forehead, "You owe me."

That sent a delightful shiver up your spine.

"Oh?" You asked, feigning innocence, "But I thought I already paid you back the other night? I mean, I did call you by that ridiculous name you wanted."

"Oh trust me," he growled, a tendril shoving its way into your underwear, "You'll be calling me a lot more than that by the end of the day."

He brushed the tendril along your sex.

Your legs shook, thoughts racing, pulling up some of the things he'd said about how much you'd want to kill him if he teased you…

You felt the tip of tendril just start to suction to your sex-

And then he pulled away, "By the way, there's an HR meeting in ten minutes. Might want to pull yourself together."

And with that, he moved past you and out the door leaving you shivering.

What an asshole .

Hurriedly, you buttoned up your pants, tucked your shirt back in, and made your way down to HR.

Your hand was literally on the handle of the door to the meeting when you found yourself dragged backwards.

You tried to struggle but before you could break away you were pulled into a closet, the door shutting behind you.

The only light came from the glow of his face as he pushed you against the shelves.

Tendrils were all over you, under your shirt, grabbing at your sex throguh your pants, suctioning to a nipple.

You gasped, twisting a bit, unsure what to do with yourself.

The movement against your sex had you beginning to buck, trying to get more friction.

"M-Myc…"  whimpered.

"Such a mess and you're right outside of HR, what would Mr. Mothman think?" He needled you, "Maybe I should make you scream so the whole wing knows what you're up to."

Your heart was pounding. Fuuuuck that sounded…

"Hot? Yeah, I know." He said with a chuckle, "I see all the filthy thoughts you have about me. About the things you want me to do to you. That's why in teasing…" he leaned in closer, a tendril making its way under your clothes, circling your entrance, " I always win ."

And just like that he withdrew, making his way across the hall, "See you in the meeting!"

You were left disheveled, half dressed, and aroused standing in a janitor's closet.

You scrambled to pull yourself together before anyone caught you. When you'd gotten yourself mostly under control, you made your way to HR.

You entered the meeting still flustered. Mr. Mothman looked up in surprise, "Welcome! I guess I can mark you as present after all!"

"Yeah, sorry, I got a little held up on the way here."

"No trouble, we were just gettin' started." He gestured for you to take a seat…

Next to Myc.

Mooootherfucker.

You took your seat graciously as Mothman launched back into the meeting.

"Now, can anyone give me an example of sexual harassment in the workplace?"

The mushroom spoke up instantly, "Grabbing a coworker's dick violently?"

Mr. Mothman looked perturbed by his specific statement but continued, "Any sort of grabbing of one’s private areas would be considered sexual harrassment!"

"Hm… that so?" Myc said contemplatively.

"Of course! It's perfectly reasonable to expect a workplace without that sort of behavior."

You shot Myc a look.

Two could play at the game.

"What about someone in charge making out with an underling in a closet, is that sexual harrassment?" You asked innocently.

Mr. Mothman looked at you like you'd grown a second head, "Y-Yes?! That would also be manipulative if the person is in a position of power-"

"What if everyone consented?" Brett asked innocently.

"It's still not something you should be doing in the workplace!!" 

This poor dude.

You hoped you didn't drive Mothman to drink.

"And engaging in intercourse at the office is…good or bad?” Myc trailed off.

"Bad! That's exactly the sort of thing HR is here to handle."

"So we should come to you for sexual favors." Myc said, chuckling.

You thought this poor trainer was going to pop a blood vessel… or whatever mothmen had for blood vessels…

Myc was escorted out of the office and you welcomed the relief.

Even if that had been kind of hilarious…

When the meeting was over you made your way back up to your office. You still had paperwork to get done and, maybe if you were lucky, you could pop back home at lunch to get off.

"You really think I'm gonna let you do that?"

The hair on the back of your neck stood on end as your door shut behind you.

Tentacles flipped you around, your face to the wall. Your pants were tugged open, one tendril on your sex the other circling your entrance, mercilessly teasing you but not pushing in.

"Fuuuuck Myc!" You squeaked out.

"It's not even lunch yet!" He chuckled, "If you think I'm gonna give you what you want that fast then you've got another thing coming."

You gasped, legs shaking as he glided a tendril along your sex.

You'd discovered, through your adventures with him, that the ends of his tentacles were exceptionally versatile. They could be used in lieu of hands, but they could also suck and the openings could pinch and tug lightly.

Which was what he was doing now, using the flexible opening to tease and play with your sex. It almost felt like light nibbling or someone kissing along your skin. You whined, rocking your hips.

"So fuckin needy!" He laughed, "We got a whole day ahead of us, kid."

"Myc!" You gasped.

"Yeah?" He leaned over you, the gills of his cap brushing against your head, "What? You gonna beg already?"

You shuddered, "Y-you are so gonna get it when you're back in the milking machine "

His voice was low, "Funny how you think you're not going to be my milking machine tonight."

Ohhhhhhhh fuck…

The tendril at your entrance just barely dipped in, twirling slowly just inside, " Someone likes that."

You shivered, "Of course I do, asshole! You're in me."

"Oh I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about you being my milking machine.” a tendril ran through your hair, settling there, you could just see the faint glow of pink on the wall, “Hmmm... oh oh ho ho ho… you want to just be ready for me? Like some kind of sex toy? Fuuck that’s hot, kid."

You moaned as he echoed your fantasies back to you.

"Could always set you up as public access…” he chuckled, “I know plenty of people around the place could stand to blow off some steam."

Ohhh god…

Between the way his tentacles were on you and the shit he was saying, you were already feeling your orgasm rising-

He pulled away abruptly, "Oh, speaking of, it looks like I've got a meeting with the JO squad in ten."

You gave a cry of frustration and he chuckled, leaning over your shoulder, "Now… don't get into any trouble while I'm gone. Remember, I'll know if you do."

A tendril nipped at your sex playfully to emphasize his point and with that, he was out the door.

Tugging your clothes back up, you shivered, part of you wanted to say fuck it and either take lunch early or lock the door sit at your desk and rub one out but another part of you thought of the consequences.

If he could be as mean as he claimed, there was a possibility that he might just not let you get off or that he might drag this teasing out for a week instead of a day.

You weren't sure if you could take that…

Grumbling about the mushroom, you went to your desk, breaking out your paperwork. Maybe you could at least get some work done while he was busy with the squad…

Lunch. Okay. You could at least go home and catch a break from the teasing bastard.

Or so you hoped.

It was nice to be home. A cozy little apartment. Near enough to work for lunch or lunchtime naps. Especially useful on the days you forgot your badge.

You flopped down on the couch, burying your face in a pillow.

Fuck he was a lot…

"You ain't seen nothin yet, hot stuff."

You froze at the sound of his voice and, before you could react, a weight hit you, and tendrils were under your clothes. One sucking and pinching at a nipple. Another ferverently rubbing against your sex.

Gasping, you looked back. He was perched on your lower back, tendrils having a field day with undoing your clothes, "You followed me home? "

He chuckled,  "We both know you were thinking it. Of course, I could always go .."

He moved to withdraw and you whined, "No! Please!"

"Please what?~"

"Please, please Daddy? "

He chuckled, "Calling me that when I didn't even ask? You must be desperate…"

Your pants were tugged down, trapping your legs. Your shirt was opened, giving him better access to your chest. His flagella were so thin it was easy for him to slip them into tight areas.

You gritted your teeth, trying not to moan as he suctioned to your sex, another tendril slipping into you, toying with you.

"You know, the squad just didn't do it for me today." He said conversationally, as if he wasn't inside you right now, "I mean, I came but it's not the same when I know I just left a hot piece of ass in their office ready to come."

"Fuck you." You huffed.

He chuckled and leaned down, a tendril bracing himself against the arm of the couch, "Not your best choice of words."

You cried out in surprise as the tendrils sped up, another slipping in beside the first, fucking you in tandem.

"M-Myc…"

"What? Isn't this what you wanted?" He sounded so full of himself but under it you could hear the way his voice shook.

You trembled, feeling that desperation that had been building all day start to reach a fever pitch, you rocked your hips, wanting, needing, fuck you just-

He stopped.

"FUCK!" You yelled, your hands tearing at the couch cushion, "You fucking bastard !"

He laughed, "What? You didn't really think I was gonna let you come, did you?"

You whined.

"But…" his voice dipped lower, amusement in it, "What was it you said last time? Oh yeaaaah, there's no reason only one of us should have fun ."

Ohhhh fuck…

And suddenly you were being railed . No pause, no hesitation, just merciless fucking .

You cried out, body shaking. Fuck, you wanted to come. God, you wanted to come so bad and he wasn't just pushing you to that edge, he was ramming you there. You started to cry out, body tensing-

And then you were empty.

You screamed into the pillow, your hips rolling, trying to get any friction that might push you that last bit you needed…

"Fuck you’re hot like that…" he moaned.

The soft weight of him on your back, the tendrils wrapped around your thighs…

God, he was so close… Fuck…

"Not yet…" he said, amused, "It's gonna be way more satisfying making you scream later."

You shook, " Please …"

"No." He chuckled and then tendrils were back inside you, fucking you into the couch.

How the fuck did he have that much force? He was a god damn mushroom!

And then he found that place that made your back arch and your body tense. He was absolutely vicious with it. Rubbing it, striking it, ramming against it, using the tip of his tendrils to grip or suck at it.

"OhfuckohfuckohfuckMycMycMyc-" you cried out in frustration as he pulled away again, leaving your entrance twitching.

You were damn near in tears, your body aching and begging.

You felt a shudder from your back and he groaned, "Fuuuck, I'm gonna take your throat too if you keep getting that close."

You whimpered, imagining him taking you in both ends.

Not that you had to imagine long because suddenly he was back inside you. A stem pressed to your lips and you opened obediently.

"Suck it." He commanded.

Fuuuck… you did as you were told.

The taste was bittersweet and earthy. He thrust in deep and you nearly gagged at first, but then he pulled back in shallower strokes.

"Gonna have to ask Andre about that deep throat drug he's got. That'll get rid of your gag reflex real fast." He gasped, "Then I could fuck your throat."

You shuddered.

The three tendrils inside you were wrapped around one another now and they felt larger, probably engorged given what you remembered from last time…

Fucking god you were so close… so unbearably close ..

Suddenly, he seized and the tendril pulled itself from your mouth-

And your face was immediately doused in fluid. You felt him draining into you from behind. Pumping more and more swells of fluid into you. You reached up, running a hand over your face and grabbing the tendril that was still leaking.

Your hips were rocking and you realized you were still begging, "Please Please Please Please…"

You squeezed the tendril in your hand in time with the roll of your hips.

He shuddered, "No… it's not your turn yet." He gasped, "But if you're gonna be my milking machine tonight, you gotta be ready for it. Consider this a test ruuuun–FUCK!"

Another gush of fluid into you. He was barely moving now.

The movement of the fluid felt good but it wasn't enough . If anything it only made you want more.

"Myyyyc…" you nearly sobbed, "Please!"

"Told ya, you'll be ready to kill me by the end of the day "

You were shaking, trembling, and you were dimly aware that this couch was probably fuckin’ ruined now but fuuuuck…

Suddenly, he pulled out and you felt fluid hit your back, leaking out of you, running over your thighs, soaking through your clothes…

"Fucking hell, kid…." He breathed, " Fuck, you look good like that..."

You were gasping, hips still rocking for any kind of friction.

He pulled away and when you reached down to touch yourself a flagella caught your hand, "You do that and I won't let you come for a month ."

You shuddered, body aching.

"You asshole."

"Damn right I am." He chuckled, "I am gonna fuck you until you can’t remember your own name tonight."

Shivering, you managed to sit up, feeling more fluid gush out of you as you did.

"I'll send my upholstery guy over. He knows what he's doing." He said, lighting up a cigarette he'd acquired from… somewhere.

"Might wanna clean yourself up before lunch is over…" he stood back, admiring his handiwork, "Just think, someone's going to see how much of a mess we've made…"

Your face burned both with shame and because that sounded way hotter than it should...

You were still shaking as you got to your feet. Your sex was twitching at the lack of contact and you felt like, in that moment, you would have done anything if he would let you get off…

He leaned in, his voice amused, "I wouldn't think things like that unless you want me to follow through on them."

Shakily, you tugged your clothing up. Even the brush of the fabric made you want to touch yourself…

"Remember, no jerkin’ off. I’ll know if you do "

You nodded, flipping him the bird as you made your way to your shower.

You were going to run this thing as cold as possible.

Maybe that would help…

The shower might have helped…

If he didn't follow you.

"Hey!" You protested.

"What?" You could hear the amusement in his voice, "Gonna deny me a show?"

"With you it's gonna become something more than a show!" You snapped back.

"Well, someone's optimistic."

Huffing, you stripped, clothes falling to the tile in a wet puddle of blue green goo.

Stepping into your shower stall you shot him a dirty look, "What is this anyway? Are you just here to make sure I don't get off without you?"

"Maybe.~"

"And you call me fuckin’ needy." You quipped, lathering yourself up.

He simply took a draw on his cigarette, watching you through the glass.

Forget about the mushroom. You needed to get cleaned up, god knows how long that took, lunch might already be over.

The glass door opened and you looked over at him, "Just here to watch, huh?"

"You're not the only one that likes to be clean, jackass." He sniped back.

You ignored him, focusing instead on rinsing off.

What a jackass. Just an absolute fucking tease. A sadist. That's what he was-

"Might wanna hang on to that bar there."

You paused and looked back at him, "Wha-" 

He leapt up, tendrils seizing your waist. The added weight almost knocking you off your feet.

He grasped your waist with two tendrils, tipping back a bit. You grabbed the support bar just to make sure you didn't fall over. Looking down you watched as his remaining four tendrils twisted around one anot-

Oh-

They surged upward into your entrance, knocking the wind out of you.

He chuckled, "Weren't expecting that, huh?"

Still clinging to your waist, he made a rocking motion with his lower body, using it to piston the tendrils in and out of you, striking the areas he knew made you weak in the knees.

"Ohh, f-fuck…"

It felt amazing but without your sex being touched, it was a bit…

"Well, if I touch you right now you’re gonna come." He said in response to your thoughts, "And like hell I'm letting that happen."

He fucked you hard and rough, barely letting you catch a breath. Nearly knocking you off your feet.

If he'd let you touch yourself you'd have already come by now. Fuck, you had to have him do this to you another time because-

Your train of thought was abruptly derailed. After a particularly deep thrust he unwound the tendrils from one another, splaying them out inside, using them to stretch you.

"M-Myc!" You gasped, shaking.

The motion made him feel far bigger than he was and your body tried to clench around it, wanting.

And then he slipped out of you.

You sagged there, sore and hot and god you just wanted him inside you again…

"Sit down."

He dropped to the floor and you sank down, turning to sit with your back to the wall.

He approached you and you looked up, panting.

Leaning forward, he let a tendril tease along your sex. It was gentle.

Much, much more gentle than you were used to from him.

You moaned and were surprised when another tendril came up to stroke your face. At first you thought he was going for your mouth again, but instead it was a soft sort of petting motion.

You leaned into it, gasping as he did something below that made you-

He withdrew and you let out a whine.

He just chuckled, "Yeaaah I should really let you get cleaned up. You're already late."

Late?

You frowned, "What?"

He stepped out of the shower, taking one of your towels to dry off before holding up your phone to show you the time.

"FUCK!"

You scrambled upright and he made his way to the door, tossing the towel in the laundry basket as he went, "See ya at work, hot stuff!"

You were going to murder this fucking mushroom .

" Ha!" He leaned in the doorway, "Called it!"

He retreated when you threw a back brush at him.

Pissed.

You were fuckin pissed.

Not only did you not get off but you were late coming back from lunch and you didn't even get to eat . You swung by a fast food joint and grabbed something before heading into the office. You nearly collided with one of the fellows of accounting and snapped at him, immediately apologizing.

Jesus, this asshole was doing a number on you.

You decided that heading to your office wasn't the best course of action. He'd already ambushed you there and you were sore and irritable and just ready to eat lunch and work.

So, bag and food in hand you made your way into the depths of the building, to the less commonly used halls. It was a relief to find an out of the way lab, even bigger relief to realize it was unassigned. 

You cleared off a table, dragged over what looked to be an ancient office chair and settled in to eat and work.

It was nice down here. Quiet, peaceful, nothing but the soft buzzing of the fluorescents and the whirring of the ventilation system to distract you.

The food you'd brought was great too but that could just be because you were hungry as hell.

The lab you were in, from what you could tell, was an old medical lab or maybe an infirmary? Medicine cabinet, exam table, various medical charts and such. 

In Cognito this sort of thing wasn't unheard of. Medical experiments and such were part of what made the world go round.

It was nice having a little hideaway to work in…

But part of you couldn't help but wonder what would happen if Myc found you.

Well… you know what would happen but still…

God he’d been such a jackass since your first interaction but, for some fucking reason, you found it hot. Why was it hot? Fuck if you knew. Maybe it was something about how self assured and cocky he was.

Or how funny he could be.

Or maybe it was just the tentacles.

You didn't know, all you did know was that next time you got the chance, you were edging him waaaay longer than last time.

Closing your eyes, you took a minute, just trying to get your brain off from him and his stupid smug attitu-

Tendrils settled on your shoulders, "Wanna play doctor?~"

Shit.

He chuckled, leaning over your shoulder, "What? You picked the perfect spot for it. Hop up on that table and I'll give you something to think about tonight."

You huffed, side eyeing him, "I'm starting to think you're not gonna get me off tonight either."

The gills of his cap and the soft glowing orb of his face nuzzled against you, "If you're good I'll make sure you get off as many times as you can tonight.”

You shivered and he turned your chair to face him.

"So? You gonna play nice?"

The words sank as a heated stone to the pit of your stomach, rekindling the need he’d been building in you all day.

“Fine.” you said, getting up, “You wanna malpractice suit, that’s on you.”

“Catty! I like it!” there was a sharp sting as a tentacle slapped your ass. You jumped slightly but moved to the exam table he’d indicated.

“Here, if you’re gonna play the part, you gotta look the part.” he tossed something to you and you caught it awkwardly.

“I… Are you fucking serious?” you asked, holding up the patient gown he’d just thrown at you.

“I’m waiting .” he gestured, his tone filled with mock irritation.

“Fine.” you huffed, undoing your clothes.

“Ah ah-" he waved a tendril, "S lower .”

Ha… ah… ohhhh boy that shouldn’t be that hot what the fuck?

You slowed down, carefully unbuttoning your top, slowly sliding down your pants, removing your underwear and laying everything to one side next to your things. You shrugged on the gown, tying it in the back and hopped up on the table feeling absolutely ridiculous, embarrassed, and aroused.

Why the fuck was this hot this was so fucking stupid you weren’t even into this sort of-

Your thoughts were completely obliterated when a pair of tendrils opened your legs.

“I can make anything sexy, hot stuff, thought you realized that by now.” 

Fuck…

A tendril came up to tease at your sex, "Damn, that was quick, or maybe you've just been this turned on since earlier? Kinda impressed with myself."

You looked away, feeling your face burn. Youd been fucking horny all day, that wasn't news .

The tip of his tendril grazed sensitive areas and your legs tensed. There was a sort of nibbling, nipping motion from it, soft and exploratory. Given how worked up you were it was fucking torture.

Fuck… god you wanted him to fuck you senseless. You hoped he followed through because if not you weren't going to be able to keep up your end of the 'don't jerk off' part of things. If he didn't… Well, suffice to say you'd be spending a lot of time in bed tonight with a collection of toys...

There was a shudder from him as it the tendril suctioned to your sex. 

"Fuck, you can't be thinking like that, kid. I just might fuck you senseless right now."

Ohhhh god…

"Please?" You begged, looking at him.

Another shudder, suddenly he was on the table with you, pinning your hands back, legs held apart and an insistent pair of tendrils teasing at you.

Fuck, how did he move that fast?

God you wanted him to fuck you. Especially if he did what he'd done in the shower. He'd have you screaming his name in no time.

"Fucking hell, kid, give me a break." He huffed, "You're already tempting enough."

He pushed inside, swirling the flagella around, seeking out tender spots that made your legs lock up.

"Myc… come on…"

"Fuck no." He snapped, "You knew what you were signing up for."

It was true but holy fuck .

You squirmed, gasping as one tendril pulled out of you, running playfully over your sex.

Whimpering, you tried to rock your hips but you couldn't do anything to get more friction.

"Christ, I'm gonna have fun with you tonight." He moaned, still teasing at you, "I’m gonna fuck you until you can’t move. You feel so fuckin good…"

He punctuated this with deep thrusts, grinding against a place in you that literally made your legs ache from how taut your muscles were.

"F-fuck, Myc…"

And then he pulled away.

You were too tired to protest much, just giving a sulky whine.

He chuckled, leaning over you, "No getting off without me, doctor's orders."

You flipped him the bird and he laughed, letting you up, "See ya later, kid. Just think, you're almost there ."

"Was that an edging joke?"

"Maybe.~"

He left and with a frustrated sigh you changed back into your work clothes.

You were not normally one to drink on the job. It wasn't unheard of here given the nature of the work. But you thought that, maybe, it would give you a small reprieve...

It did not.

You were well into your drink at Mcultra’s when a familiar neon body hopped up on the stool beside you at the bar.

Immediately, you were on guard.

"Geez, kid, relax. Can't a guy go out for a drink?"

"That depends on if it's just a drink." You countered.

"Aw, what? You don't trust me?" He waved down the bartender, "Tony, the usual!"

An old fashioned whisky glass was slid down to him and he dipped a tendril into it.

Side eying him, you took another drink.

“What? Needed a little break?” he chuckled.

“After the shit you’ve been putting me through today?” you asked, shooting him a dirty look.

“Ooooo mrow!” he chuckled and waved a tendril, “Catty as hell today huh? Must’ve really worked you up.”

“Oh fuck off, Myc.” you said bitterly.

He tipped his head, looking at you and you felt something trail along your thigh, “Hmmm.... not the smartest reply you could have given.”

You glared at him over the rim of your glass.

He leaned his cap on one tendril, propping it up on the bar. You felt a tug at the button of your pants and bit your lip, giving him a look.

The button was tugged loose and you felt the tentacle snake inside your underwear, teasing at your sex slowly.

“I’m gonna fucking kill you.” you muttered.

He chuckled, “Aw, sweet talkin’ me already?”

You shuddered as he stroked at you, running up and down your sex. Huffing with irritation, you took another drink.

Clearly, that wasn’t enough of a response for him. He gave a light tug to your sex and you hunched over, nearly choking on your drink.

Tony approached, concerned, “Is everything okay?”

“Oh, yeah, don’t worry, Tony.” Myc put another tendril around your shoulders and waved him off, “They just had a rough day and wanna wallow in it for a while.”

“Ah.” The bartender’s response was filled with understanding, as if this happened all the time.

The rubbing and teasing at your sex became more insistent and you shuddered.

Motherfucker…

You watched with irritation as Myc dipped a free tendril back into his drink, swirling it idly as if he wasn’t doing the exact same thing to you under the counter.

“You are a jackass, you know that?” you growled.

He chuckled, “Told ya’. What? Didn’t believe me?”

Glaring at him, you took another sip of your drink, trying to subtly adjust your position.

“Or maybe…” he leaned in, the tip of his tendril suctioning to your sex, “Someone just got cocky and thought they could take it.~”

“You know, given what I did to you, this seems pretty excessive-”

You gasped as he released your sex, instead flicking it sharply with a tendril, “You fucked me so hard I needed first aid.”

“First aid?”

“The tube, numbnuts, that wasn’t just lotion or something.”

Oh…

You felt your face burn.

“Not that I’m complaining, mind you.” he chuckled, “But if you’re gonna dish it out, you better be ready to take it.”

You shuddered at the implication and held a hand to your face, biting a knuckle as he suctioned back to you again this time harder.

Shit…

Fuck…

You didn’t want to come in a bar in full view of everyone. How the fuck would you keep quiet? Jesus-

And then, just like that, the suction stopped.

“Hey, Tony! Put it on my tab, yeah?”

The Easter Island fellow behind the bar waved to him and turned his attention back to another customer that had sat down.

“See ya later, kid.” Myc chuckled, slipping off his seat and heading out the door.

Frustrated and embarrassed, you covertly buttoned your pants, threw back the remainder of your drink and paid your tab before leaving.

This son of a bitch was going to get it the next time you got a chance.

Your office was quiet and relatively dim today. You hadn’t bothered opening the blinds up again. Sitting back in your chair, you closed your eyes and relaxed. Maybe you’d just go home and sleep… or maybe to a hotel and sleep. You were honestly really exhausted given what Myc had put you through today and a nap sounded amazing.

You started to drift a bit, letting sleep cloud your vision and easing back in your chair…

It was a weight climbing into your lap that woke you.

You opened your eyes and found yourself looking up at your tormenter for the day.

A tendril trailed along your neck, the tip sucking lightly at your skin.

"Ah…"

He chuckled as you tilted your head to the side, giving him more access.

Tendrils made their way up under your shirt. His face and cap brushed by your cheek. Tendrils held you, exploring you…

It was… well… a lot more sensual than you were expecting. There was that soft purple glow again…

He was silent, which was odd too...

Reaching up, you trailed your fingers over the orb of his face and then down his torso-like stem, enjoying the feel of him.

This was slower and softer and you weren't 100% sure what had brought it on but you certainly liked it.

You'd probably like it more after you got off, but it was still nice.

A tentacle brushed against your sex through the fabric of your pants. Not grinding or rough, just soft…

He leaned in, the gills of his cap brushing against your head as he spoke, "Let's go back to my place…"

Ohhhhh wow okay yeah fuck uh…

You felt your face flare with heat.

That was way, way, way more…

Fuck, what? Intimate? Flirty? You weren't sure of the right word for it but it was definitely a different vibe than what you'd been getting from him all day.

All you could do was nod in response.

He slid off of you and made his way to the door, leaving you to follow.

He chuckled, looking back at you, "Knew that'd getcha."

"What-"

"That sappy shit." He walked alongside you.

Your face burned, "Oh shut up."

"Not so tough after a day with me, huh?"

"I'm just gonna remind you that your dicks are within stomping distance."

"Don't threaten me with a good time.~"

Your disapproving huff was only met with laughter.

After a quiet elevator trip (during which he was surprisingly hands off), you found yourselves on the first floor.

Wait…

“Hold on, how are we getting to your place?” you asked, eyeing him.

“What? You think I can’t drive?” he snarked.

“I… was thinking more about the whole mushroom thing but-”

You paused, rubbing at your eyes as you looked back at him.

Where he’d been standing a moment ago there was a person. A slim, middle aged white guy sporting casual business wear. His hair was cropped short with a touch of gray at either temple.

“Uh…”

He chuckled, “Neat trick, huh?”

“Myc?”

“No shit, who else would it be?” he shrugged, “I mean, I can pull off anything though.”

And suddenly he was Andre. You couldn’t pinpoint when the shift happened it just… did. Suddenly he just was someone else. A slender black woman in a red dress with long dreads was next. Then a teenage girl who looked like the first chick to get killed in a horror movie, snapping her gum, wearing fishnets and a miniskirt.

And then back to the first guy he’d presented as.

“H… How?” you asked, staring at him.

“Psychic projection.” he shrugged, “I just make you see something easier to handle. Bit of a bitch when out walking around sometimes but works well enough.”

You followed him as he started to walk to the parking lot, “Wait, hold on, so you can just… make yourself look like someone else?”

“Yeah."

"And you aren't constantly using that to fuck with people at the office?" You asked.

"Nah, it doesn't work on cameras, so it's good for a laugh but I can't really get away with it. Do it in public sometimes though."

"Okay but you just said it doesn't work on cameras…"

"Yeah but Cognito has a whole department just for monitoring security footage and making corrections. Last year I was about a third of the budget." He chuckled, "They'd fire me if they had any other source of bio cerebrate but," he shrugged, "Unfortunately, finding someone willing to let you milk them every day isn't exactly easy."

He led you to a car and you paused, looking at him, "Really?"

"Yeah. Look, not everyone is as willing to part with their goo as I am-"

"No, I meant the car ."

He looked between the bright blue car and you, "What?"

"That thing looks like it belongs on a show floor.”

“No shit?” he leaned on the roof of the car with a smirk, “Well, that would be because it’s a Mercedes, genius.”

“I’m gonna key your fuckin’ car.” you sniped back.

His tone was chipper but mildly threatening as he unlocked the doors, “You do and you’re payin’ for the paint job!”

With a huff, you got inside, buckling yourself in.

He chuckled, glancing over at you, “You’re hilarious.”

“What?” you asked, glaring at him.

“You don’t find me as hot like this.” he gave you the most smug look you’d ever fucking seen and you wanted to strangle him, “You really are a monsterfucker aren’t you?”

Your face went hot, “Oh shut up!”

“Well, don’t worry, you’ll be seeing the real thing again soon enough.”

You settled back in your seat, turning your attention out the window as he pulled out of the lot.

“What? Embarrassed? ” he snorted, “Look, by mushroom standards I’m a monsterfucker too.”

…

You hadn’t exactly considered that fact but you supposed he was right.

“Of course, knowing how interesting your search history is, I can see why you’d be all wound up.”

“I will jump out of this car,” you muttered.

“And I’ll back over you.~” he sing-songed almost lovingly.

It was going to be a long fucking evening.

When you got to his place you were surprised. You expected him to be all over you but, instead, he was far more chill. As soon as you stepped in the door he flickered back to his usual self.

"Want anything to drink? I know you're thirsty." He teased.

You grumbled to yourself, following him.

"You're kinda cute when you're sulking." 

He led you up to his room, taking a moment to fiddle with a remote on a desk-

The room was bathed in soft purple lighting, low music played from somewhere…

"How about you get on the bed?" He suggested, not looking at you.

You wanted to protest out of spite but… fuck, he’d been winding you up all day.

Tugging off your clothes, you climbed onto the circular nonsense he called a bed.

He joined you, still surprisingly slow given how he'd been all day. You laid back feeling… well, kind of sheepish. Yeah okay, he’d been fucking with you all day but there was something about this specifically that made you suddenly feel exposed. He leaned over you which only amplified the feeling.

Naked, exposed, vulnerable…

It didn't help that he was in your head, either… which meant he knew all of this…

"Sure do, Hot Stuff." He chuckled, a tendril trailing over your body lightly, "Pretty adorable, actually."

That only flared up your embarrassment and spite.

You turned away from him.

Tendrils moved over your skin, making you shiver.

"Fuckin hell, kid, you’ve been amazing today."

You curled in on yourself just a bit, face hot.

"You ready to be my milking machine?"

Ohhhh god… That thought went right to your sex.

"Because Daddy's ready to give you a few loads."

You shuddered as a tendril ran along your spine and finally managed a nod.

"What do you say?"

Goddamnit.

"Please, Daddy?"

He chuckled, flipping you onto your back, "That’s right."

And then he was in you. A tendril suctioned to your sex, another supporting him as he leaned over you, two more pistoning inside you, the remaining two wrapped around your waist to anchor himself.

"Ohhhh fuck you feel good." He moaned, "God, you’ve been so good for me today."

You gasped, squirming as he toyed with your sex. The tendrils inside you were seeking out the places that made your legs go weak.

Fuck…

You panted, one hand coming up to rest at the back of his base, steadying him as you rolled your hips.

"Didn't even touch yourself once." The tendrils around your waist squeezed, tightening.

He stretched you, splaying out his flagella in wide spirals, forcing you open. It made him feel huge and god your body was here for it.

Taking a moment, he stilled, focusing on expanding and contracting that spiral of limbs inside you.

You tensed, your body aching for it.

"M-Myc… Myc please …"

"Ohhhh fuck yes that’s it." He chuckled and began to thrust into you again, flexing and coiling the tendrils inside of you, making sure to stroke firmly against the places in you that made your body beg for more.  

"M-Myc please please, fuck, I need to come, please…" you were so close. So fucking close. You’d gotten close so many times today and fucking hell did you want it.

There was a full-body shudder from him as you begged and he immediately picked up the pace.

You gasped as he added a third tendril, "Fuck, I’m gonna fill you up and cover you. You looked fuckin’ amazing covered in it…you know that?"

You tensed, your body barrelling towards that release. God, you wanted it…

But part of you kept expecting him to pull back and, as a result, wouldn't let you tip over the edge.

Tears of frustration started to well up and then he slowed down and leaned in, the soft edge of his cap pressed to your brow, "Come on, kid, you've been a good little fucktoy all day." He said it with his usual horny gusto but there was something in the praise part of it, a softness that you registered, "How ‘bout you come for Daddy?"

Oh fuck-

You screamed, hips bucking into the air as you clenched around him. He held tight to you, practically riding you like one might ride a mechanical bull.

"Fuuuuck that's it, kid." He moaned and you felt the same steady pumping sensation you'd felt last time as he unloaded into you, pulling out a tendril to shoot it across your chest and stomach.

"Fuck yes." he moaned.

You reached up, grabbing the tendril and running your hand over it.

He only sped up, practical railing you, stretching you. Shuddering, you worked a finger into the tentacle's opening and he cried out, another gush of fluid entering you from below. Readjusting, he sat back, pulling out of you to wrap those tendrils around your legs, the spare three he shoved into you, the one in your hand was tensing and pulsing around the finger you’d slid into it.

The moaning from him intensified and he shuddered, “Christ, that’s good, keep that up.”

You moved your finger in a stroking motion, watching him tense and gasp as you did. God, you were sore, given everything from the day, but you wanted to get off again. As many times as he’d let you.

He chuckled, “What? You think I’d do all that and only let you go once? Jeez, I’m not a monster.”

His body rocked with his motions, the tendrils inside pumping fluid into you. The swell of the fluid pushing through your entrance made you shiver with delight. It was like being entered over and over again while still filled. Add to that that he had three in you and fuck, you were close to coming again already.

The tendril in your hand had begun to swell a bit, leaking around your fingertip. On a hunch, you pulled your finger out gently, letting the trapped fluid spatter onto your body.

“O-oh fuck…” he moaned, “Fuck you look good like that.”

And with that, he sped up. The tentacle tending to your sex stopped its suction, flicking and rubbing against it, wrapping around it, and you could feel the fluid leaking over you. When you were sufficiently wet with him he suctioned the tendril back to you and you cried out, tensing as your body was overwhelmed again.

“MYC!” you reached up, pulling him down against you.

He made a surprised yelp as you did but never stopped his motions.

You were trying to catch your breath but he was barely letting up. Tipping your head up, you kissed along the globe of his face.

For half a moment you thought you’d upset him. His motions slowed, nearly stopping until you whined.

And then he was back to railing you again, as best he could in his current position. You continued to kiss along his face, up the gills of his cap, your body shaking

Fuck he felt good.

It was a wholly different experience from fucking a human.

A wholly different experience from toys.

Tentacles, in general, just moved differently. They were stronger, more flexible.

And fuck did he know how to use them.

As dumb as saying Daddy felt to you, the fact that it worked on him encouraged you to try something.

Reaching up, you brushed your fingers along the gills of his cap softly, and in a low voice you whispered, “Give it to me, Daddy.”

He arched over you, cap pressing into the pillow your head rested on, and those familiar swells of fluid rushed into you making you squirm and moan.

“God, you feel good…” you gasped, “I’ve wanted to kill you all damn day, but fuck this is worth it.”

He chuckled, “We’ll see if you say that next time.”

You shuddered at the idea and cried out, tensing once again, as he managed to prolong the sensation of your fading orgasm.

You weren’t sure how many times you came after that. With stimulation and the continuous pumping into you it was hard to keep track. But finally, after you’d practically screamed yourself hoarse, he pulled out, flopping next to you in exhaustion.

You both lay there, drenched. Trying to catch your breath, you turned to him, wrapping an arm around him.

The motion seemed to make him tense for a moment.

Shit, maybe you’d hurt him?

You waited for a response that didn’t come before realizing you hadn’t said it out loud.

“Hey, did I hurt you?” you asked, worried.

“Nah, kid, I’m good.”

He seemed a little… off. You weren’t sure why though.

“Kinda surprised you're not making commentary on my thoughts." you chuckled.

There was a moment as what you said sunk in, "...I can't read your mind much right now."

He… what?

"What?"

"Yeah, remember, bio cerebrate isn't just for memory wipes." he gestured.

“Wait… hold on,” you tried to bite back a smirk, “You're telling me that if you come too much you lose your psychic powers?"

His response was sulky, almost petulant, "Maybe…"

You snorted, "Okay, that's hilarious."

"Well, I'd like to see you manage after losing most of your bodily fluids!" he snapped, pointing at you with such enthusiasm that he spattered your face with fluid leaking from his tendril.

Squinting, you wiped at your face while he cackled.

You retaliated by wiping the remainder across his cap. He just laughed harder.

“You did that on purpose.”

“Nah, that was just natural comedic timing.” he chuckled.

“You’re an ass.”

“That’s not news.”

You flopped there, your head resting against his, watching the soft purple lights revolve on the ceiling.

Your brain finally began to register the music that was playing.

“If you're horny let's do it,

Ride it, my pony,

My saddle's waiting,

Come and jump on it!”

You couldn’t help it, you started laughing.

“What?”

“ This is your fuck playlist?” you snorted.

“What?!” he protested, “I’ll have you know Ginuwine's 'Pony' is a classic! ”

You just cackled harder.

“Besides,” he poked you with a tendril, “I didn’t hear you complaining.”

“Well, I was a little distracted.” you chuckled.

“Like your music choices would be any better.”

“Are there any good music choices for fucking?” you countered, gesturing, “Like, seriously. Everyone responds differently to songs so like you could end up putting something on and the person just is instantly turned off.”

He reached over to the side table, pulling out a cigarette and lighter, “The idea is you’ll be too busy getting railed to pay attention. If you’re focused on the music during it, I’m off my game.”

He lit up the cigarette, taking a draw from it.

“I guess that’s a good point. I sure as fuck didn’t notice the music was playing after I got on the bed.”

“Exactly.” he chuckled.

“How the hell is this bed not like… molded?” you paused, considering your choice of words, “Uh… no offense?”

“A hydrophobic mattress and a good house cleaner works wonders. Not to mention custom floor drains.” he gestured.

“I guess a lot of planning goes into a mushroom fuck pad.” you chuckled, shaking your head.

“I mean I gotta sleep here sometimes.”

The two of you laid there watching smoke drift up from his cigarette.

It was weird, there was something kind of soothing about this. Despite being kind of disgusting given you were covered in fluids there was a nice calmness in the wake of it. A quiet sort of content silence between you.

Even if the next song that started playing had the lyrics:

“And right now I wanna sex you baby,

Has anybody sexed you lately?”

“You know, you were fuckin’ mean today.” you said, glancing over at him.

“You loved it.” he chuckled.

“I wanted to kill you.”

“Yeah, like I said, you loved it.”

“You know you’re gonna get it later, right?”

“No shit?” he looked over at you, voice dripping with sarcasm, “It’s almost like that’s our thing .”

“I need something to drink, what about you?”

“Yeah.”

You peeled yourself off of the bed.

Quite literally.

“Oh that’s fucking disgusting.” you grimaced at the sensation of fabric sticking to you and strands of cum trailing behind you.

“You mean fuckin’ hot.” he chuckled.

“Weirdo.”

“You love it.”

Rolling your eyes, you carefully (given the floor was slick at this point) made your way to the kitchenette, locating some bottled waters. You tossed them on the bed, joining him again.

The bed might be sticky but at least it was soft.

The pair of you sat there, drinking and recovering.

After a while a thought occurred to you.

“I’m definitely going to need a shower… and- fuck.” you paused.

“I mean I’m always down for it.” he looked over at you.

“No, I mean,” you pointed to your clothes which were slowly soaking up fluid that had leaked onto the floor, “I’m gonna need clothes.”

He waved a tendril dismissively, “That’s what Veronica’s for.”

Oh yeah… housekeeper.

You sighed, resting your eyes, “You know… I realize I kinda know jack all about you like… aside from the broad strokes.”

“Kinda the point, kid.”

“Okay, yeah, yeah I get it, casual, but it’d kinda be a good idea to know I’m not fucking like a Nazi mushroom or something.”

He laughed, “Why the fuck you think I care about shit like that?”

“I don’t know!” you gestured, “I didn’t know you drove a Mercedes either!”

“Alright, fine, what do you want to know?”

“Uh…” 

Well shit, now that he asked, your brain wanted to go blank…

“Must not matter that much.” he snarked.

“Oh shut up, you just fucked my brains out, give me a minute!”

He laughed, shaking his head.

“So I guess not a Nazi.”

“No, I’m not a Nazi. Why would I care about that crap? I'm not even human!”

“Yeah but you live with humans so maybe you have opinions.” you shook your head, “Uh… hm, I dunno abortion rights?”

“Once again, not human, why do I care what people do with their uteruses?”

You shrugged, “Shit man, I don’t know!”

“Then why are you asking stupid questions?!”

“Because maybe I wanna have something to talk about after fucking? Damn!”

The sniping back and forth wasn’t mean spirited. At least it didn’t feel that way. You got the idea he was being difficult just to fuck with you a bit.

So why not fuck with him back?

"What about God?" you eyed him.

Ah yes, let's hit all the ‘don’t talk about it at the family dinner table’ topics.

"Oh please,” he laughed, “You monkeys have been a blip on the radar for two minutes and you think you got it all figured out? Talk to me about God when you’ve been around for a couple of millennia."

You paused, looking up at him, "...Millennia?"

"What, you didn’t know that?" He laughed.

"Wait, how old are you?"

He chuckled, taking a drag on his cigarette and tossing you his phone, "Check the RightSwipe profile, sweetheart."

"FOUR THOUSAND AND FORTY-ONE?!"

"And I don't look a day past two thousand.~" he chuckled.

"Holy shit..." You stared at him, then back at the profile, "Are you fucking serious?"

"As a heart attack." He took another drag on his cigarette.

"What the fuck? What- I..." You sat back, dumbfounded for a moment before pulling up google on his phone.

"What do you think you’re doing?"

"Looking up something- That’s literally the beginning of recorded history, what the fuck."

You couldn’t stop yourself from staring.

Not only was he easily over a hundred times your age, but he would also have been around for the invention of writing, for the burning of the Library of Alexandria, for-

He waved a tendril, "The Titanic, the World Wars, yeah, yeah."

Something else set in as you thought about this.

You’d been not only hanging around with but fucking someone who was a literal piece of history.

And he liked it .

Fuck, what the hell did you bring to the party if he had more than 4000 years on you?

He laughed, "Thought we already covered this, kid. You’re not just here for your good time. You’re here for mine."

Heat rose in your face at that.

"...Okay has that really been an issue like... the whole time?"

"Eh," he waved dismissively, "Off 'n on. You definitely go above and beyond though."

You stared at him, "No way."

"Way." He sounded amused, "I mean don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some masterpiece level fucking in my life. You’re not the first person to actually try but damn if you’re not good at it."

Haaaa oh wow okay yeah sure uh...

Your face was burning. Absolutely on fire.

You felt... a lot. Overwhelmed, embarrassed, kinda proud...

"You should be. Proud, I mean... Fuck..."

You looked up at him and he put out his cigarette, leaning over to you, "Just talkin’ about it makes me horny."

Reaching up, you trailed your fingers along the gills under his cap, watching him shudder.

"Yeah?"

"Fuck yeah."

You kept your fingers trailing along his gills, another hand traveling down the stem of his torso, "So... What do you want?" You leaned in, brushing your lips against the globe of his face, "You want me to fuck you?"

"Fuuuuck yeah..." He breathed.

"You want me to suck you?"

"Fuuuck yes…"

"Too bad." You smirked, rolling him back and flopping across him.

"Wh- oh you bitch ."

You laughed, “Look, you’re the one who wore me out today… maybe tomorrow though?”

He sighed, a tendril coming to rest against your back.

“Sure, kid. Sure.”

Chapter Text

You grabbed a tentacle roughly, watching as he squirmed.

"You going to be good for me today?"

"Fuck you!" he snapped.

"Wrong answer." You squeezed the tendril and he gasped.

Just another normal day at the office.

Ever since your first run in with Myc, you'd become a friend of the JO squad. They were a weird bunch but they appreciated that you cut their time working on the mushroom in half.

So here you were tormenting your fuckbuddy so he’d be easier to milk.

Your life had taken a hard left turn into fucking weird at some point…

"I shouldn't let you cum." You said with a chuckle, "Maybe I can convince the squad that leaving you plugged makes for a larger load."

He squirmed, "That's fuckin evil."

"Is it?" You asked, pulling out a plug, "I mean given these, we could cut the squad down to one member…"

He perked up slightly at that.

"But I'm sure you wouldn't be interested in that."

He moaned as you worked a plug into one of his tentacles.

"Fuck you."

"Mmmm, that would be a waste of cum wouldn't it?"

He shuddered.

"Maybe if you’re good for me I can reward you with that tonight." You teased him with the sound again, "I know how much you like using my holes to get off, after all."

"Christ…"

"Maybe I'll make it easy for you and get myself handcuffed first…" you purred, "Then you can have me all to yourself, however you want me."

"C-Christ you're gonna make me cum talking like that…"

You twisted the one free tendril below the sound, cutting off any chance at relief.

"No." You smirked, "You don't get to cum for me yet."

He shuddered, "F-fuck…"

"Now… tonight… that's a different story. You can cum all you want in me then. Fuck me until I can’t stand up, even…"

You chuckled, pushing the sound in a little deeper and turning it. You kept the tentacle twisted below the sound. It drove him crazy, the stimulation inside, but unable to reach completion. The sounds he made had you ready to tell the JO squad to fuck off for a while so you could have some real fun with him, but you knew it would get in the way of their work.

So, instead, you gently unkinked the tentacle in your hands, speeding up your teasing with the sound. He writhed and twisted, gasping out your name.

"But fiiiiirst…" you let him go abruptly, "you're going to have to cum for the team." 

"Fucking bastard!" He snapped.

You smirked, "Just remember…" you leaned in, tapping the glass of his tank, "I'm all yours tonight."

"You are a mean son of a bitch."

You chuckled, "You love it."

And with that you turned and left, waving the boys in.

You doubted it would take them more than five minutes.

You got caught up in a minor work emergency involving Bill from janitorial, who mistook a container holding a particularly nasty mutagen with his work thermos. In the end, Bill… or what Bill had become , was shunted to the Live Research wing and a strict reminder that the refrigerators were labeled for a reason was issued.

By the time all of it was settled, you were seriously in need of some stress relief.

And so you were true to your word, showing up at Myc's brownstone. He wasn't home yet but Andre had been happy to help out by letting you borrow his spare key.

Making your way up to the bedroom, you checked in with Myc via text. Twenty minutes. Should be enough time...

Carefully, you managed to get both of your arms into the handcuffs, one to either side of the bed. You'd been happy to find out there was an under-the-bed restraint system (thank you Andre for the tip).

Once you were in place, you waited.

After the other day's constant teasing and how much of a wreck you'd been afterwards, the promise of tonight had you buzzing with anticipation.

The door opened, revealing one neon mushroom, who made a beeline toward you, climbing on the bed.

"Fuckin christ," he said, leaning over you, "You fuckin ruined me today, you know that? Fucks sakes, the squad had to spend an extra hour just getting it all out."

You shuddered at the touch of a tentacle along your sex, "Which means it’s your turn for a little suffering."

You smirked, "Bring it."

You saw him shiver as he leaned in, "You're not getting off until Daddy says you can. You're going to be a good little cocksleeve tonight, got it?"

Ohhhhh fuck...

You nodded and he chuckled.

"Good." He started to work a tentacle into you, slowly and steadily. Not enough to satisfy but enough to make you start rolling your hips.

"I think you're going to have to make things up to me." He moaned softly, "Because by the time you left, I was fucking aching ."

Ohhh god, the way he said aching made your hair stand on end. It was filled with want… No, with need.

You'd left him hanging. Left him for others to finish.

And he was going to make sure you regretted every minute of it.

A tentacle suctioned to your sex. You gasped, tensing. The suction was hard and relentless. It felt good but in a way that skirted the edge of pain, of overstimulation, of orgasm.

"F-fuck…" you gasped.

"By the time I’m done, you're gonna be so desperate you'll be cryin' while you beg me."

Your legs trembled at that, "Myc…"

"What? Realizing just how much trouble you're in for?"

Suddenly the tendril released your sex, instead lightly grazing it. Given the suction from before your sex twitched. The sensation amplified by oversensitivity.

"Fuck, I love being in your head for this." He said it in a breathless way, filled with desire but… under it was something else… something softer-

"And fuck do I love makin' you wait. You were going nuts the other night weren't you? Maybe next time I'll just take you in the Mercedes."

Heat flooded your face at that.

"Ohhhoho, someone likes that idea." He chuckled.

The tendril against your sex was now lazily rubbing and carressing it, hitting all your most sensitive parts. The tentacle inside you, meanwhile, wasn't thrusting but simply undulating in a way that made you shudder.

"What? You like the idea of being my portable toy?"

You squirmed, whining.

"Do ya?"

You nodded, embarrassed.

"Noooooo," he purred, "Say it."

Fuuuuck…

"I like being your toy."

"I see the things you think about, by the way. You get pretty creative."

Shit.

"You really liked that shower move, huh?"

You nodded and all motion stopped.

When you whined he chuckled, "Nah, gotta say it."

It felt like every hair on your body stood on end at that.

"Yes. I did."

"Tell me what else you liked."

"Why?" You huffed, "you can just read my mind!"

"Cause I like hearing you say it. Like how embarrassed you get too."

Ohhh god.

"I-" you gasped as he slowly began teasing you again, "I liked all of it, but fuuuuuck the shower was good. And th-the uh… exam…" your face was on fire at the thought of him asking you to play doctor. "Um .."

"What else?"

Ironically, one if the things that had stuck with you wasn't entirely sexual…

"Ooo, I’m intrigued. Tell me."

"I liked when y-you woke me up in my office…"

"Oh, the sappy junk?" He chuckled.

A spike of shame flared in you, "Yeah .."

"Thought so. You're just a big softie underneath, huh?"

"Sh-shut up." You looked away from him and cried out as he sped up his teasing on your sex, the tentacle in you now going in slow clockwise circles.

"You sure you want that? Seems like you like hearing my voice."

The thought of sensual, gentle romance was something you liked. A lot, actually. But you'd known from the start that wasn't how this was going to go. And you were okay with that really. You knew what you signed up for. This was a push and pull sort of thing. It was about getting under one another's skin and getting each other off. It's probably why you were getting so wound up, because on some level, you were worried he was going to see it as weakness. A flaw. Something to exploit. To laugh at.

He leaned over you, the soft gills below his cap brushing your forehead.

The way he caressed your sex and teased you hadn’t stopped, but there was a twinge of discomfort. Your thoughts were getting jumbled up in self hate and-

"Kid."

You looked up at him, his voice pulling you out of your head.

"Relax."

It seemed so odd coming from him given his apparent delight in making others miserable.

"I don't care if you're weak for the mushy stuff. Just gives me another card to play." He chuckled and then a tentacle trailed up along your body gently curling against your cheek with a soft touch.

You couldn't stop yourself, you leaned into the touch, your breath stuttering. You felt ridiculous given what the two of you had gotten up to already but the caress of your cheek made your heart pound and your body shiver.

"Fuuuuck, kid…" he breathed, "And if it's gonna make you feel like that, then I gotta do it. Bet I could make you come twice as hard."

That made you shudder. Looking up at him, you said the only thing you could manage.

"Please?"

He froze and for a moment you thought you'd done something wrong.

Then he nuzzled you with the soft orb of his face and began teasing your sex in slower, more deliberate motions. The kind that made you feel like you were being swept up to a gentle peak over and over. It was soft but it was also frustrating.

You wanted . Oh fuck how you wanted.

"You know, being sappy means going slower." He teased, "And alllll the torture that goes with it."

You gasped, squirming at the slow methodical pace he set.

His head rested against your brow, one tendril stroking along your cheek, down your neck. 

For a while the only sounds were soft moans, gasps, and the hitched breathing that came with sex. He kept his motions soft and slow, still keeping you from your climax, still teasing at you.

Fuck it was hot and you were needy and this was just…

OH it was good…

He was quiet, which… You didn't mind per se but you did like hearing him-

"Yeah?" He chuckled, "What about hearing me say I wanna see how good you look spread for me."

Your face immediately went hot and you gasped as a pair of tendrils stretched you open.

"F-fuck!"

"Christ, you just wanna clamp down so bad. It takes some effort to open you up."

A tentacle swirled around inside while two others actively pressed outward against your walls.

God, you wanted more…

"Oh, you're gettin' more dont you worry. I have plenty of payback to dish out. But first…"

You cried out in protest as he pulled away from you. Leaning over the edge of the bed he fiddled with something. There was a sliding sort of noise. A box landed next to you with a soft whump.

"Let's get the real fun started."

A shiver raced down your spine at that.

He opened the case to reveal a surprising number of sex toys-

"You're hilarious, this is only what I keep under the bed! I'm a bit of a collector."

"A bit?" 

"Remind me to show you the closet later."

He sorted through the various options. There were plugs, fleshlights, dildos, vibes of all kinds, a few more novel items like Wehrenberg wheels and crops…

"Anything bigger is stored in the closet." He chuckled, "I'd have 'em on display but it doesn't match the room's vibe. And people get too damn distracted. 'How does that work? Where does that go?" He shook his head, "Where the fuck d'ya think it goes?"

Your body was craving contact, but you tried not to protest. You had a feeling if you interrupted, he’d make you wait longer.

"Damn right I would." he said glee, "Now… I think we'll work with this…"

He retrieved a vibe from the box along with a few other choice items and, in moments, you not only had a vibe pressed to your sex, but secured there firmly. It wasn’t on, but the promise of it had you aching.

He sat back, surveying his handiwork, pushing your legs apart so he could get a better view. "Fuck that's hot…"

You whimpered and he held up something clasped in one tendril.

You barely had time to register that you were looking at a remote before he flipped it on.

*Myc!" You cried out, hips bucking of their own accord, "Holy shiii-i-i-t…"

"Cute. Now, let's see what you can handle."

Several tendrils worked into you, pistoning in and out, striking areas that made your legs shake. 

"Myc!" You rocked your hips, need building in you.

And suddenly the vibe shut off.

"Fuck!"

He chuckled, watching you tense, body twisting in need.

"Look at you all cute and needy."

You shuddered and the vibe flipped back on.

"You know what's great about being a mind reader?"

Fuck you were right on the edge-

The vibe switched off again.

"I can tell exactly when you're about to come."

Ohhhhh fuck. Those words raced down your spine like lightning.

A tendril inside you was working hard against a spot that made you cry out, words spilling out of you in a rush.

"Pleasepleasepleaseplease…"

"Please what?"

God it wasn't enough. It was so close but it wasn't enough. Your body ached for it.

"Please can I come, please Myc?"

You expected to be told no. For the teasing to drag on. That was what he'd said would happen. Instead, he made a low, guttural sort of sound and flipped on the vibe.

One tendril looped over your shoulder, holding you close as he thrust into you.

Your body arched. You wouldn't have been able to stop this orgasm even if he'd said no. The scream that came out of you was hard, fading down to a breathy gasp. The smooth orb of his face was pressed against your cheek, the sound of gasps and murmurs came from him as he continued to move.

Tipping your head, you nuzzled him.

"F-fuck kid…"

Turning, you pressed a light kiss to the bright orb.

Fuuuck, he was still moving and your body wanted it.

"Fuck you’re sensitive tonight." He moaned while grinding into the place that had sent you over the edge the first time, "'S like your body is beggin’ for it."

"Th-thought you were gonna tease me."

"What? You think it's over?"

That gave you a full body shudder.

"Maybe I should grab a few toys, see how much you can really fit."

The thought of that made you ache. You wanted that.

Badly.

He chuckled, "Well arent you a kinky fuck? Stay right here. Oh, wait, I guess you can't leave anyway." The latter half dripped with sarcasm.

With that, he removed his tentacles from your body, albeit a bit reluctantly, and made his way to the closet. When he returned, he was holding a large dildo with a thick knot near its base.

Ohhhh….

"Hope you're ready for some fun, Kid."

He clambered back onto the bed, situating himself between your thighs.

"Ready?"

You nodded and just like that, he was on you again. A tentacle sucked and teased at your sex and the toy he held sank in right down to the knot. Gasping, you shivered. You could feel the knot pressed against your entrance and you wanted it badly.

"Don't worry. I plan on giving it to you."

Your face was hot as he read your mind, but you were actually kind of grateful for it.

He began to thrust with the toy, one tentacle firmly wrapped around its base. It ground against your entrance, a tantalizing stretch that you wanted inside you.

"I think you'll fit it juuuust fine." He purred, pushing deeper.

The toy sank in a little further, the top of the knot starting to stretch you.

Given you'd just come, your body was more than eager to accept it, but it still would take some effort. Myc's tentacles could only open you so much.

The toy thrust forward again and you felt the knot progress. It widened you, opening you up.

"That's it, Kid. Take it all…"

You gasped when he pushed harder and the knot suddenly sank into you completely.

"Myc!"

It was hard and firm and stretching you and he continued to grind it into you, the knot rocking back and forth within you.

Your body was shuddering and he simply teased more at your sex, rocking the toy in short thrusts into you, never letting the knot slip out.

It was a lot but god, how your body loved it. The thickness, the way the knot settled inside, opening you up, the way the tip still ground against places that made you want to scream.

"You gonna come again for me?"

"Please?" You begged.

A pair of tentacles rose up, before your hands, "You gotta help me out too."

Nodding, you immediately accepted the tendrils in hand, rubbing and teasing at them, toying with the opening lightly before pushing a finger inside.

"Jesus Christ…"

The attention made him speed up, the toy inside you moving at an erratic pace.

You couldn't stop it, your body beginning to buck and writhe as you came hard around the toy inside. Having that knot made all the difference. Your body tried to tighten around it and the pressure it gave only prolonged the sensation.

"Ohhh fuck kid, you look so good like that."

He came hard, the tentacle spraying you in thick bursts of blue green fluid. 

You kept stroking him, teasing the openings, putting a finger inside to build up pressure before removing it so a larger burst spattered on you. 

"Fuck yes, just like that, just like that…" He moaned, "I'm gonna cover every inch of you in it."

"Give me all of it." You gasped, "I want all of it…."

Fluid gushed onto you, running down your chest and stomach, over your thighs…

When he finally finished, you both sat there, catching your breaths.

You saw the pale light of his orb deepen to a soft purple before lighting up pink with his speech, "Fuck, Kid…"

Reaching across you, he retrieved something-

"Say flagella!" He said with a chuckle, snapping a photo of you.

"Myc!"

"What? I'm not allowed spank bank photos?"

"That better not end up anywhere at work."

He waved a tentacle dismissively, "Relax. This is for my personal collection."

On one hand, you didn't trust him as far as you could throw him-

"HA!" A snarky laugh interrupted your thoughts, "But you handcuffed yourself to my bed, sure."

On the other hand, it was… kind of flattering. That he'd keep a picture of you.

"Don't put too much weight on it, Kid, I have a lot of people's pictures."

Of course he did.

"Fuck, I am going to need a shower…"

"Shame, given that looks so hot."

"Won't look hot when it's dry."

"... Point taken." He unlocked the handcuffs, "Careful, floor’s wet."

"Aw, you care." You smirked, easing yourself off the bed.

"As hilarious as it would be to watch you crack your skull, you're way more interesting alive than dead."

"Such a gentleman." You snorted.

He lit up a cigarette, "Go shower before I show you how wrong you are."

Chuckling, you made your way to the bathroom.

When you emerged from the shower, the room was clean… for the most part. The floor still felt a touch slick, but the bedding had been replaced and things were once again dry.

You collapsed into the bed, still naked and absolutely exhausted. He joined you with a chuckle, "If I'd known that's all it took to shut you up, I woulda done it sooner."

You flipped him the bird before rolling onto your back.

"What?" A flagella came to rest on your shoulder, where it gently swept back and forth across your skin, "Thought you liked the mushy stuff."

You face burned a bit and you turned to face him. With a chuckle, he gently poked your forehead. "You're cute when you're irritated."

"And you're cute when you're begging."

"Oh ho ho, snippy tonight, huh?" His voice was snarky but amused as he laid back.

He lay there, looking up at the ceiling as he finished off another cigarette. You shifted closer to him, one arm looping around him, hand cupping his face. He tipped his head a bit as though glancing at you. If he had any objections to the affection, he kept them to himself. 

With a content sigh, you nuzzled up to him. 

He was a bit of an awkward shape for cuddling, but not an unpleasant one. Looping an arm around his main stem was easy enough.

Your instinctual response would be to throw a leg over his body as well. But you weren't sure if it would be uncomfortable for him.

As it was, you were comfortable. Your body felt lax and tired in the pleasant way orgasms gave. And it took no time for you to slip into sleep.