Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Just a fair warning! I was re-bingeing Hermitcraft while season 8 is being made, and I watched the recent lore streams last night before bed... So this is the product of that.

I may say this book is like seriousness treated with humor? I don't know what to say honestly. I may edit the tags more, but until then, We get this. 

(My laptop is trying to update on me and I keep saying no to the update until I post this, so three hours of regret, anger, and absolute hell is incoming! For me at least... )

Chapter Text

A portal opened above the spawn village. None of the hermits knew. All of them were in their respective sections. The Boatem crew were in Boatem causing chaos in their little corner *Cough* Grian blowing himself and anyone he could up with end crystals *Cough*, The Big Eye crew were still cleaning up boats, The Octagon bros were breaking the game as usual... Normal Hermitcraft things for the hermits!

So naturally, they all freaked out when their communicators pinged with multiple names (that weren't their cam accounts or any new hermits Xisuma had informed them about) popped up in the chat.

Tommyinnit has joined the game

Tubbo_  has joined the game

Ranboo  has joined the game

Ph1lza has joined the game

Technoblade has joined the game

Dream has joined the game

<GoodtimeswithScar: Uh oh, Guys?>

Purpled has joined the game

Sapnap has joined the game

<Grian: Doc>

<Grian: Did you break the game again?>

<Docm77: Why is it me you immediately blame?>

<Tango: We could always blame Zedaph if we need to.>

<Zedaph: WHAT>

<Zedaph: >:(>

<Xisuma: Everyone, calm down>

<Xisuma: Head to the spawn area and we'll figure this out>

<ZombieCleo: Why do I feel like this is going to be like 3rd life again?>

<Grian: I thought we agreed to never mention that>

<Rendog: Ok Mr. It-was-a-prank>

The hermits gathered all the things they needed, Grian made sure the magical menagerie was locked up and the Jellie's were safe. "Meow." Jellie mewed to her look-alike, who blinked at her and slinked away to hide in their favorite pot. "Be good you two. And don't terrorize Boo this time. Scar and I won't be long." Grian said, getting his tools and flying towards Scar's Lanbo. The other hermit was busy fumbling to put his netherite leggings on, again. "Scar! How many times do I have to tell you to keep these on?" Grian huffed, helping Scar put his pants on. "Gri! Scar! C'mon!" Impulse yelled as he flew by. "Working on it!" Scar yelled back, finally getting his leg in the pant leg. "Here's your rockets, keep up," Grian said quickly before jumping off Scar's balcony and taking off. "Darn it! I lost my hat!" Scar groaned, looking around his base for the oversized red tophat that made him think of Willy Wonka.

The Boatem crew were the first to arrive at spawn somehow. With Scar getting lost halfway there, making Grian have to backtrack to find Scar stuck in a tree, don't ask how he did it, Scar doesn't know either. Then Cleo and Joe appeared, then the rest filed in. Xisuma smiled under his helmet and explained what they were going to do.

"Apparently, their admin, Dream, was making a new server for a new season, but their portal led them to us. Now, We must treat them as we'd treat each other." Xisuma said. "Is that a good idea?" Cleo asked. "Yeah, I've heard that their last season was a bundle of chaos and angst." Ren followed. "To be honest, 3rd life and last life was full of that too and look at those who participated in it." Tango said. "I got PTSD about being around Bdubs." Grian said. "Hey! I didn't want to lose!" Bdubs huffs. "I'm gonna shut up on that." Scar said. "You're still in trouble, Scar." Grian said. "Aw, the lovebirds are at it again." Impulse chuckles. "LOVEBIRDS!?" Scar and Grian yelled, catching the newcomers' attention.

"What the f-" One was about to yell. Another covered their mouth and scolded them. "Phil?" Grian said, catching the other's attention. "Grian?" Phil asked. "G, who is that?" Scar whispered to Grian. "My brother. And his sons." Grian said. "Wait, what!?" Scar said. "Yeah... I'm surprised he even remembers me!" Grian laughs, ducking to avoid the shoe Phil threw at him. The shoe ended up hitting Mumbo in the chest, knocking the wind out of him. "Why?" Mumbo wheezed out, clinging to Grian. "So, what brings you guys here?" Grian asked. The boy Phil was holding was waving at Grian. "Hi, Tommy... But seriously, how'd you get here?" Grian said.

"Dickhead over there messed up the portal." Tommy huffed, sticking his tongue at Dream. "Hey! I didn't mess up shit!" Dream said. "Who's gonna enforce the minimal swearing rule we made?" Impulse asked. "We had a swearing rule?" Scar asked. "You rarely swear, so it never applied to you, Scar." Mumbo said. "Aw man..." Scar sniffed. "How do you still have twigs in your hair?" Pearl asked, picking the leftover twigs and leaves out of Scar's hair. "Pearl... He was upside down in a dark oak tree. I'm pretty sure he's got some in his elytra too." Grian said. "You guys can go to the end!?" the smallest of the newcomers yelled. "Uh, yeah? Why?" Tango said. 

"Dickhead over there banned us from going to the end!" Tommy growled. "Ah..." The hermits growled, the need to teach Dream a lesson in adminning was very evident in each of their faces, more on Scar's than anyone else's. "Grian, would you mind taking Ranboo, Tommy, and Tubbo with you and your friends while Dream and I speak with your admin?" Phil said. "I guess? Do they want to join?" Grian asked. 

"HELL YEAH, I DO!" The smallest one yelled. "Tubbo... Stop screaming... My brain still hurts from being dead and alive again." The tallest one groaned. "Sorry boss man." Tubbo said. Through the process of elimination, the hermits were able to figure out who was Ranboo. The minors walked over to the jumper clad man. The before mentioned minors huddled by Scar and the others, but one remained. Grian could tell they were lost and confused, so he smiled and walked close to them.

"You can join us if you'd like. We don't mind. In fact, I think a few of us could use an extra set of hands." Grian said. "D-Do I have to swear allegiance to you guys or something?" They asked. "Nope. All you need to do is keep up with us." Grian smiled, letting the younger join Boatem before watching the others take the possible adult newcomers. The Boatem crew walked with the four they were given, explaining the server and who they were. Tommy knew of Grian, the watcher being his uncle and all, but he had no fucking clue who Pearl, Impulse, or Scar was! He had a vague idea on who Mumbo was, but he was still a tad clueless.

Ranboo was busy soaking up all the information while Grian talked to the last minor, which he learned was named Purpled and is an alien boy with no parents, about where Boatem is and what it's all about. Tubbo was busy wondering why Scar had such a big hat on his head, so everything went over his head.

To say Boatem was in chaos was an understatement. They still had Ravengers roaming about that would charge at the inhabitants of the faction, making them all scramble for safety or protection. The minors didn't mind the Ravengers. In fact, Tubbo managed to kill two with his bare hands! It kind of made the original five Boatem members fear that they may have a killer on their hands. Or at least a psychopath. Ranboo managed to outrun them most of the time, and Tommy? That boy managed to make the beasts regret even laying eyes on him. He cursed them out so much that they keeled over and became a puff of smoke. 

"'It'll be fun to have a nephew' they said 'You won't be alone in being michevious' they said." Grian groaned, making Scar and Impulse look at him like he had managed to throw Doc into the ocean. Not that he hasn't done that before, but hey! "Why do I feel like the server is going to be like when you first joined?" Scar asked. "You mean having a civil war break out or making a few games that brought us together?" Grian asked.

"Uncle? Which of these is yours?" Tommy asked. "The one without a back." Mumbo and Impulse said at the same time. "Ok ok! Just because last season I didn't really finish the back, I'm gonna do this it this time!" Grian huffed, his wings puffing up a bit. The minors immediately ran to Midnight Alley. Well, Ranboo, Tommy, and Purpled ran that way. Tubbo ran to Scar's Lanbo and began to climb inside the massive thing. "Well, Now we know who chose who to watch them..." Pearl yawned, getting her rockets out to fly to her base. Mumbo did the same while Impluse simply laughed and walked to his base.

Grian flew to his base while Scar scrambled to make sure Tubbo didn't break anything. He's already had his windows destroyed, anyway. Grian made sure Tommy didn't go anywhere near the menagerie, last time he let the younger go near an animal, the poor moth was kept in a jar with a hole in the top. He's never seen Clemintine since then... Is it at least still alive? Ranboo and Purpled ran through the buildings, starry eyed about how different they all were. Ranboo loved Grian's storage monster he had made, opening barrels and taking out grass blocks when they found some. Purpled sat at Grian's mob spawner, hacking away at the collected mobs with an old iron sword Grian had laying around. No, wait... That's a new one. The kid made a new sword. Well, he has to go around trading again for iron, or mine for it.

Scar was having worse luck with Tubbo. The boy managed to get stuck in a small space and trigger Scar's sound box for all the sound effects he had. "Hey, Scarry dude! What's with the hat?" Tubbo asked. "I dunno. Last season was eventful and I was mayor last time, so I figured this season, I'd be like a tycoon man, making as much money as my business can. Why'd you ask?" Scar said. "Because it looks too big on your head." Tubbo smiles. Scar smiles at the younger's statement and sighs. "I guess you could say that... But did you know that everyone in Boatem has their own hat made by me? They don't wear them, except Pearl. But they keep them." Scar said. "Could you make me one!?" Tubbo yelled. "Of course I can, Tubbo! In fact, come with me. I've got a factory just for making hats." Scar said, holding a hand out for Tubbo.

The two went to Scar's hat factory, Tubbo rambling about bees after Scar mentioned Xisuma being a bee last season. Not that the boy didn't fuel Scar's ideas on what kind of hat Tubbo would be getting, but he had a vague idea to include bees in there. Scar makes the hat and smiles at the design while he holds it over Tubbo's sleeping head on the workbench they were at. The hat consisted of a bee's antenna and was a small basket-like hat that was similar to Pearl's, except instead of a llama, there was a place to put flowers there in case Tubbo wanted to bring bees to Boatem. Scar smiled as he put it in his dispenser and gently shook Tubbo awake. 

"Your hat's ready. I just need you to go to the hat machine there, ok?" Scar said. Tubbo did so with shaky steps. Clearly, the flashbacks from DreamSMP were kicking in, but Scar made it quick and easy by telling Tubbo to keep his eyes on him. After that, Tubbo happily pranced about Boatem showing off his new hat. He also bugged Pearl about her hat being like his slightly, which made Scar beam with pride. Boatem has never been as lively as it was today. Maybe because its founding was on pure last minute idiocracy and randomness, but Scar likes how the four new members made their small part of the season seem more homey.

"Scar!" Scar hears, turning around to see Grian land next to him. "What's up G?" Scar asked. "I need you to watch over the kids while I talk to X. He sent me a message and said Phil asked for me specifically, so I need you to watch Ranboo, Purpled, and Tommy. Can you do that for me?" Grian asked. "Only if you promise to help me with my base above yours." Scar said. "Deal. Thank you so much Scar!" Grian said, hugging Scar. "Don't worry, now go see X!" Scar laughed, shooing Grian off towards Xisuma's base.

"Are you two dating?" A voice asked from below Scar. The man screams and jumps almost out of his skin. "Sweet Vex! How'd you burrow into the floor already!?" Scar asks Purpled, who was munching on a coal block. The boy shrugs and takes another huge bite out of the mineral. "I just did, but are you and Gri dating? You seem to hit it off." He said. "First of all, why are you eating that? And second, no." Scar said. Purpled smiled, showing his abnormally sharp teeth.

"I don't like the things you guys eat. Too squishy." was the answer Scar got. Turns out, the minors all loved to get lost in everyone's base. Tubbo got locked inside Impulse's candy tubes while eating the jelly beans, Ranboo teleported into the dome that was Mumbo's armchair, Tommy flew into Pearl's windows too many times that she's taken them all down, and Purpled has claimed a building of Grian's alley and a corner of Scar's swaggons with the excuse of 'I can't leave my dads alone.'

"Ho, man... How am I gonna tell Grian that I lost y'all in our bases?" Scar sighed, pulling Ranboo out from Mumbo's chair. "Simple! You don't!" Tubbo sang, playing with a slimeball he stole from Mumbo. Tommy tried to figure out the redstone box Impluse made on impulse (haha, get the thing? No? Ok, I'll stop) and Purpled ate more non-food items, like diorite. Maybe Iskall could find a use for that now.

Does feeding an alien things you don't want count as finding a use for that thing?

Chapter Text

Phil held Dream's hoodie while the others dispersed with the rest of the hermits. Sapnap went with Tango, Techno went with Doc. The rest of the hermits went to their own bases, leaving Phil, Dream, and Xisuma at the spawn. "So, You banned your players from going to the end?" Xisuma asked. He was trying to refrain from sounding like a disappointed parent, but the need to scold Dream was screaming in his mind. "W-well... I had reasons to!" Dream yelped. "Like what?" Phil asked. "..." Dream mumbled, pointing his face so Xisuma and Phil couldn't hear him. 

"If you don't tell me, I'll be forced to look at your code." Xisuma threatened. He didn't want to threaten the other to tell him something, but he needed to know why Dream would do such a thing. There was an Admin oath for Void's sake! "Look, I only remember taking the oath, making a server, and exploring a cave with my friend! After that, I can't remember anything! I don't even remember half of my server's members!" Dream said, rubbing his eyes. "Get Grian," Phil said. "Huh? Grian? What's he got to do with this?" Dream asked, shivering from MCC flashbacks to when Grian killed him all those times.

Xisuma nodded at Phil and whispered to Grian.

You whisper to Grian: Hey, could you come back to spawn? Phil asked for you.

Grian whispers to you: Sure? Give me a minute, I gotta get a babysitter for the kids.

You whisper to Grian: Kids? Did you already adopt those four?

Grian whispers to you: No?

"G's on his way. May take a bit since he has to get one of the Boatem people to watch the youngins... So Dream... Mind telling me about your server more?" Xisuma asked. "N-Nothing too much to say. I made it so I could get to know more people. I didn't expect going into a cave and getting lost would account to this..." Dream said. "Wait, you don't remember leaving that cave?" Xisuma asked. Dream shook his head as Grian landed next to them. "You called for me?" Grian asked.

"Grian, can you check Dream over?" Phil asked. "You want me to check him over? Like in a medical sense? If you want that, you'll have to go to Pearl, Doc or Stress for that." Grian said. "You know what I mean." Phil groaned. "Oh... You want me to do that, huh?" Grian finally said. Both Xisuma and Phil nodded. Grian sighed and looked at Dream, who looked clueless. "Ok, Dream. I need you to listen carefully. Follow Xisuma to a bed and lay down. Get comfortable, since that helps with what I need to do." Grian said. The other blond nodded and followed Xisuma. "You should go with them. I need to mentally prepare myself... I can sense one of them on him." Grian said. "Hey, I'll be there if you need help." Phil said. 

"Thanks Phil. Now go make sure X and Dream are comfortable... I'll be in shortly." Grian said before a ping from his communicator sounded. "After I see what's going on." He finished, looking at his communicator. 

<GoodtimeswithScar: Grian, did you know Purpled eats whatever can be mined?>

<Grian: Don't let him eat any diamonds!>

<Purpled: Why would I eat those? I can't even get inside those glass towers of yours!>

<Tubbo_: Impulse has bees!>

<ImpulseSV: Tubbo, no>

<Tubbo_: Tubbo yes>

Grian smiled as he watched the messages ping before he accepted his fate and went to follow Phil into one of the remaining village houses left  and saw Dream lying on the yellow bed twitching his fingers. Xisuma was looking out the window and Phil stood at the door, motioning for Grian to go inside.

"G, are you sure you got this?" Xisuma asked, looking at Grian with an unreadable expression in his voice. "I hope so... Just keep an eye out, ok?" Grian said, looking at Dream then back at Xisuma. The other nodded and kept an eye on the two in front of them. Grian sat beside Dream and smiled a gentle smile, placing a hand on Dream's forehead. "Don't worry, ok? Just relax and close your eyes for me, yeah?" Grian said. "But, that's how I lost my memories in the first place." Dream sniffled. "We're gonna find them, ok?" Grian said. He knew it was a lie. 

In fact, he knew what happened to Dream and why the boy couldn't remember shit after the cave. He also knew that this was going to be a bumpy ride for both him and Dream. But Grian knew he had to help. Xisuma could only do so much while Phil can only bring death upon someone. Dream nodded and held his hand for someone to hold. Xisuma, being the lovely admin he was, held Dreams hand while he watched Grian put the boy to sleep. "I hope this isn't what I assume it is." Grian whispered as he jumped into Dream's mind. 

Dream was running through the forest with voices after him. "C'mere Dream!" They playfully yelled. "Leave me alone Sapnap!" Dream yelled back, climbing up a tree. Grian stood on the treetops, watching the chase unfold. Dream was hopping from treetop to treetop with Sapnap behind him. "No!" Sapnap yelled as Dream placed blocks to stop Sapnap from following him. Grian turned to see a demon and a cat following. There's another one. A boy with goggles on. 

"George! You don't need that flower!" The demon huffed. "But it's the only flower I can actually see!" George yelled. "Oh my muffin... Sapnap, how're you doing?" The demon asked. "I'm tailing him! Well, kinda... I fell off the tree." Sapnap said. The setting shifted to Dream cheering in the End. His arms were raised up in victory while the other four groaned. Grian watched as Dream jumped into the portal and was teleported to his friends, who playfully punched him. There was a distant hum that Grian knew far too well. 

"ᓭ𝙹, ||𝙹⚍ ⎓╎リᔑꖎꖎ|| ᓭ⍑𝙹∴ ⚍!¡." It growls.
(So, you finally show up.)

"∴⍑|| ↸╎↸ ||𝙹⚍ !¡╎ᓵꖌ ⍑╎ᒲ?"  Grian replies.
(Why did you pick him?)

"∴⍑|| ᒷ⍊ᒷ∷ リ𝙹ℸ ̣ ?" It hums, a smirk evident in it's voice.
(Why ever not?)

Grian takes a deep breath as the scene changes again to just Dream and George exploring the cave systems in the server Dream made. "Dream, stay close, ok?" George said. "I will, Gogy. Only if you say you love me!" Dream giggled. "No," George said, turning a corner with Dream in tow. While the brunette is mining the iron in the wall, the voice is active again. This time, speaking the Player's language.

"Dream..." It sang from the shadows. "Hey, George? Did you hear that?" Dream asked George, who looked up from the furnace in front of him. "Hear what? All I hear are the spiders around us." George said. "Only you can hear me. Come to me. I can help you." It chanted, making Dream look around. "Hey, George, I'm gonna go and see if I can find some diamonds, ok?" Dream said. "Ok. Be safe. And make sure to check your surroundings!" George yelled after Dream who nodded and ran into the darkness. "No! Wait!" Grian yelled, running after Dream. 

Everything merged into a black void with Dream sitting in the middle. Grian sighed as the blonde blinked and sat. "When will you let me go?" Dream asked. "I'm wagering on... Never!" the watcher who took over Dream's body cackled. "You said you'd help me!" Dream yelled. "And you believed me? You are more gullible than that demon friend of yours." they sneered. Dream sobbed and began to wish he was dead. 

"Dream..." Grian said, catching Dream's attention. "I will help you. You can trust me." Grian said to Dream, who shook. "N-No... Last time I trusted someone who said they can help me, this happened! My friends can't look at me the same again!" Dream yelled. "I... I can tell. But can you try to reach out to me? Please? I can't get past Nightmare, but you can. Please." Grian said. "H-How?" Dream whimpered. "Focus on my voice, ok?" Grian said. "No! You belong to me! You're mine!" Nightmare yelled. "Just focus on me. Ok?" Grian said.

Meanwhile, outside of Dream's mind, Xisuma watched as both Dream's and Grian's eyes were a bright purple. "I still can't get over how creepy that looks." Phil said. "I'm used to it. Do you know how many times this happens here? Poor Grian is still negotiating with the moon." Xisuma said. "Wait, what?" Phil said. "Yeah, look outside." Xisuma said, Phil did so and choked on air. "It's fuckin' huge!" Phil said. "Watch your mouth, and yep. Also, hold on." Xisuma said, holding the bed while an earthquake passed by. "This happens often?" Phil asked. Xisuma nodded as both Grian and Dream gasped. Both of their eyes reverted back to their normal colors. Grian's being pitch black and Dream's being a bright forest green. "What happened?" Xisuma and Phil asked. "He was possessed. By you-know-who." Grian said. 

"Oh... How'd he encounter him?" Phil asked. "He got tricked." Grian yawned. "Sorry, I haven't been able to sleep since the Moon and all." Grian yawned, rubbing his eyes. "Why don't you sleep?" Phil asked. "Boatem has a cult forming about not sleeping to appease the moon. My friend Mumbo made the shrine and we just threw our beds in the fire and we haven't slept at all. Thank Void that the moon thinks we're crazy. She doesn't mind that we sleep the night away, she's just looking for something..." Grian yawned again. "And the earthquakes?" Xisuma asked. "Result of the thing she's looking for. Something about a missing chunk of a stabilizer? I forgot." Grian sniffled, shaking his head to stay awake and not pass out.

"A-Am I free from him?" Dream asked. "For now, yes. But I think I'll need to teach you how to control him. Don't worry. I'm still learning the more advanced stuff on my own, but I can teach you the simple things. Like how to make your fingertips not glow." Grian said, pointing to Dream's fingers. The other shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded. Grian smiled and motioned for Dream to follow him. 

"I'll take you to Boatem, ok?" Grian said. "O-Ok.." Dream said. Grian got his communicator out and messaged Boatem.

<Grian: Boatem, we're getting another addition!>

<PearlescentMoon: Oh no.>

<PearlescentMoon: Nononono>

<PearlescentMoon: Tommy's already stolen my windows! Not another one!>

<MumboJumbo: Make sure they don't fall down the Boatem hole!>

Llama fell out of the world

<ImpluseSV: Tommy NO!>

<Tommyinnit: Tommy yes>

<Tango: You boatem kids are weird.>

<Grian: It's because we've flown into objects way too many times.>

<Stressmonster101: That should be just Scar and you then.>

<Grian: WhAt!? No! You count too, Stress! You've flown into my mansion's windows many times!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: He's got a point>

Tubbo_ fell out of the world

<Tubbo_: PISS NUGETS>

<Dream: Excuse me, what?>

<Ranboo: Don't mind him... Tubbo's trying to see if we really have infinite lives>

Tubbo_ was slain by Purpled

Tubbo_ was squished too much

Tubbo_ fell from a high place

Tubbo_ blew up

<Tubbo_: WTF!?>

<MumboJumbo: O-o>

<Grian: Did you try to sleep?>

Grian walked Dream through the nether and to Boatem. "You know, this is my first time meeting an ender dragon hybrid," Grian said. Dream chuckled and looked at his feet. "You're probably judging me about slaughtering my so-called brethren." Dream said. "Nope. I ran from mine. Well, I've killed one, and ran from the rest." Grian said. Dream winced as Nightmare screeched in his head. Grian noticed this and poked Dream's forehead. "Oi, stop it up there. You're stuck in there. Be good." Grian said, making Nightmare quiet down. "How'd you do that?" Dream asked.

"I have my own... His name's Xelqua, and he's just like me now. No braincells, just weird ideas." Grian said. Dream smiled as they got closer to Scar's swaggons. "G! G, G, G, G! You're back!" Scar yelled, tackling Grian from his perch on his sand crawler. "Ack! Scar! Be careful! You could've hurt yourself more than you already are!" Grian scolded the other. "What?! But Doc upgraded my leg supports and the breathing mechanism he gave me!" Scar sniffled. "That doesn't mean you can throw yourself to the ground like I can!" Grian said, flicking Scar on the forehead. 

Dream watched the two interact and remembered George's smile and Sapnap's laughs. "I miss them..." He mumbled. He sniffled and looked at his communicator that pinged softly.

Sapnap whispers to you: Hey, Can we talk?

Sapnap whispers to you: Dream, please

Sapnap whispers to you: Dream

Sapnap whispers to you: Clay, please respond

Sapnap whispers to you: I know you're staring at your com

You whisper to Sapnap: Sapnap

You whisper to Sapnap: Stop it. We'll talk, but I don't want to see you. 

You whisper to Sapnap: I'll send you a book and quill and that's how we'll talk, ok?

Sapnap whispers to you: Fine

Dream looked at Grian and Scar again, who were watching him. "G, I think he sees us..." Scar said. "If you don't move, he can't see you.." Grian said. "I can see you two." Dream said, making the two scramble to their bases with Dream laughing. "Wait! Who am I staying with!?" Dream yelled. "Me!" Grian said, waving Dream over to Midnight Alley. 

Well, at least Tommy can see the difference between the 'Dream' from the SMP and Dream now. His teeth weren't sharp and he was afraid of the dark. Huh, maybe Dream isn't as bad. "So, that Dodgebolt match," Tommy said. "Tommy, no." Grian said. "What? It was awesome seeing you take down Fruit, Illumina, and Zeus." Dream said. "I had a mild panic attack, man." Grian said. 

The three talked about random things until the moon rose to midnight. Grian groaned as he left the two with Scar (again) to go talk with the moon again. "Why does he immediately choose me to look after he leaves?" Scar asked. "I'd say he loves you." Tommy said. "Or he trusts you." Dream said. "I think he loves him." Purpled said from his corner.

That got 4 screams in response. 1 from Dream, 1 from Tommy, 1 from Scar, and 1 from Tubbo. 

Wait.. Where did Tubbo come from!? What is happening!?

Chapter Text

The sound of a chicken being slaughtered woke both Grian and Tommy up. Tommy rolled out of bed while Grian shot up and looked around, only seeing Dream propped on one of the alley's buildings skinning a dead chicken. "That's not concerning!" Grian shouted to Dream who looked at Grian with a dazed look. "I was hungry and you had like 70 chickens roaming about!" Dream yelled back. "Shaddup you two!" Tommy groaned from the alley's floor.

The older two chuckled at the younger. Grian got out of bed and looked at Dream, who was scaling down the side of Grian's mistake building. "You need to be careful around there, Dream." Grian said, flying over to make sure the other didn't fall to his death. Grian was pretty sure Xisuma hadn't implemented the newbies into the player system yet, which meant them dying would possibly put them in a death loop. Not like the one Bdubs and him put Scar in last season. "Ah, sorry about that... I just needed a few things for something..." Dream said, looking back at his whispered conversation between him and Sapnap. "If you ever need help, I'm here..." Grian said. "Don't worry, Lil' shit up here is in timeout for a long time." Dream said, knocking his knuckles on his temple. 

"Well, don't repress him too much. Beings like him are... Destructive." Grian said. "Say, do you mind telling me more?" Dream asked. "Yeah, We've got until noon. Boatem meetings..." Grian said. "Great! Now how did you learn to control your... You know." Dream asked. "Well... Season 6 was when I lost control a few times... Which resulted in a whole prank war..." Grian said, shaking his head at the memory of the G team and Stress getting lost in their headquarters. "Then season 7 came about... And I had to reign in the troublemaker... Didn't help much, had another war about mycelium and grass. Mycelium won! But we still went with grass in the end." Grian finished. "In all honesty, it takes time and trust. I know from the small snippets I saw that you two need some trust exercises." Grian said. "Ugh... You mean I'm stuck with him?" Dream groaned. 

Grian smiled and got a shulker box full of multicolored concrete and motioned for Dream to follow. He set the box down in the last open plot left. He handed Dream a stack of white concrete and smiled. "This is your plot for your home. Tommy stole the mistake building for some reason. I leave this box of concrete for you and if you need any other materials, you know where my storage monster is." Grian said, hugging Dream close. "Ok... C-Could you take Tommy with you wherever you're going? I-I don't want anything to happen to him." Dream said. "Of course. I have no idea where I'll put him, but I can tell you he'll be safe." Grian said, going to Tommy's stolen shelter and making the boy leave to go do chores around Boatem. 

"They're gone. You can let me out now!" Nightmare yelled in Dream's mind. "Do you mind? You stole most of my time with my friends, tortured people I can't remember, and you made me a terrible person!" Dream yelled to himself, placing down some concrete in an oddly wobbly shape. "How does Grian do this?" Dream mumbled. "Well, he usually doodles out poor drawings or takes pictures." Scar said from his seat on a wooden shop sign. "Gah! Shouldn't you be at the Boatem meeting!?" Dream yelled, dropping the block in his hands. "I'm always late, I don't mind it. But! I just wanted to say hello! Now, Bye!" Scar said, flying off and down the boatem hole. 

GoodtimeswithScar experienced kinetic energy

<Grian: SCAR>

<Grian: How many times do I have to tell you to pull up>

<MumboJumbo: Bdubs, I'd like those 20 diamonds please>

<BdoubleO100: Oh come on!>

Dream smiled at his communicator and went about constructing an outline to his small home with the concrete. A familiar 'Vwoomp' was heard behind him and he spun around, ready to attack, only to see Ranboo... But not Ranboo? How does he know this kid's name? Hell, why does he remember him from the SMP even though he wasn't in control and could barely remember anything from that damned place!? "Hello?" He called out, only for Ranboo to teleport away. "Ok..." Dream said, placing the concrete back into the shulker box and got to making a book and quill for Sapnap. 

He didn't really want to talk to Sapnap, let alone have his long-time best friend see a monster wear his face! So he made the first message simple. 'No, I'm not ok if you were wondering' He closed the book and tied some string to the quill and left to go look for Sapnap. He honestly didn't want to see the younger. He wanted to die and never respawn. When he saw the ravenette being lectured by someone with very big eyes. 

Dream sighs and looks at the book in his hands. He could pull a Scar and throw it at Sapnap... But he could also walk over and hand it to the other. He opted for that option and walked over. "Sorry, Bdubs... But you gotta admit you look like Oscar the Grouch..." Sapnap replied. "I DO NOT LOOK LIKE HIM!!" Bdubs yelled. "You do." Dream replied, startling Sapnap. "Dream!" Sapnap yelled, going to hug him, but Dream stepped back, shaking his head. "I just wanted to give you this. I'm not sure if I'm ready for physical touch yet..." Dream said. "Ok..." Sapnap whined. Bdubs smiled and looked the two. Something reminded him of when he and Scar ran for mayor last season. Granted Scar always tried to weasle his way out from his hugs. Maybe he should fly over to Boatem one day and shake Scar's head around a little bit. 

"I miss your hugs..." Sapnap replied to Dream. "You're not supposed to tell me that verbally! Write that in the book!" Dream huffed flicking Sapnap on the forehead. "Ack!" Sapnap responded holding his forehand with one hand and the book in the other. "Bye now! Grian's making me make do something!" Dream said, running back to the boat he used. Sapnap hummed and looked at the book. "I miss him..." Sapnap sniffled. "Give him some time. He's been through a lot from what I've heard from you guys." Bdubs said. "But... I should've known that wasn't him doing those things..." Sapnap said. "Sometimes, you overlook the actions of those close to you until it's too late." Bdubs said, jumping when he heard a phantom's screech. "Time to shreep!"

~~~

The entire Boatem crew yelled as Tubbo burst from a wall in their meeting room. "Ranboo is missing and I think they're enderwalking!" Tubbo yelled. "Don't worry Tubbo. We'll check our bases and see if they're in there. Impulse, could you send out a server-wide alert. Tubbo, can you tell Impulse some warnings about Ranboo's situation so he could warn the rest of the server?" Grian said, holding Tubbo's shaking form. The boy nodded and went to Impulse. Grian turned to everyone else and instructed them to look for Ranboo. "Don't look 'em in the eye!" Tubbo yelled after them. 

<ImpulseSV: Everyone, keep your eyes out!>

<ZombieCleo: why?>

<Tubbo_: Ranboo is enderwalking>

<Xisuma: Which is what now?>

<Tommyinnit: It's when Ranboo's enderman side takes control and he acts much like an enderman>

<Tommyinnit: Just don't look 'em in the eyes>

<Rendog: Got it!>

Mumbo ran to his base, checking each building on there. He didn't expect to see Ranboo standing by the boatem hole. The man flew over and made sure to look at his feet. "Um... Kid?" Mumbo said, making sure to keep a good distance in case the enderling decided to attack. The other jumped at their name. "Oh! Hello, Mumbo! How did I get here?" Ranboo said. "Tubbo told us you were missing... So we looked for you. Something about Enderwalking?" Mumbo said. "Oh... I guess that did happen... Why is the void here?" Ranboo said. "Grian's idea." Mumbo said, pulling Ranboo away from the boatem hole. "I should let the server know you're alright." Mumbo said. 

"Ok." Ranboo said, messing with the grass block in his hands. 

<MumboJumbo: I've got Ranboo!>

<MumboJumbo: Are they always confused when they snap out of their enderwalking thing?>

<Ranboo: Most times I am! Sometimes I'm not...>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Ooh! Confused buddies!>

<Grian: Scar, you're always confused>

The faint sound of an 'I am not!' was heard across Boatem, making Mumbo and Ranboo laugh together.

~~~

Tubbo messed about with his new hat while Scar was off... Doing Scar stuff. Maybe he was off hunting Bdubs, Tubbo didn't know. He did know Ranboo was safe. He smiled and roamed around Scar's base, cooking some porkchops and munching on them while the phantoms outside screeched. "Tubbo! Open the window!" Tubbo heard Scar yell as he flew towards the window. Tubbo did so, allowing Scar to fly through and roll to a stop. Tubbo closed the window right as a phantom swooped down to get inside.

A satisfying THUMP was heard, making Scar and Tubbo laugh at the face of the phantom sliding down the window. "I never thought seeing a Phantom sliding down a window upside down would knock the wind out of me!" Scar chuckled from his spot on the floor. "I've never seen one this close before! Let alone this funny!" Tubbo laughed, falling on the floor backwards and laughing. 

"Say, Tubbo! Want to sneak into Impulse's factory and see what candy we can eat before he notices?" Scar asked. "Yeah!" Tubbo said, sitting up and shaking the dust off his head. To be honest, Tubbo started seeing Scar as his father figure ever since he got here. The other showed him parental love that Schlatt never showed him. But he needed one last test to see if Scar is worthy of the title. "Scar... Can you hug me?" Tubbo asked. "Huh? Are you sure? I don't want you to force yourself into hugging people." Scar said from the floor. "I just need a hug?" Tubbo said. Scar smiled and rolled over to stand, brushing off his suit. He opened his arms and let Tubbo run at him. The boy tackled him in a hug. A normal father would let him hug them with no mean questions asked. Schlatt always yelled at him and made him feel ad for needing a hug, but Scar? 

He happily hugged Tubbo and let the boy do as he pleased! "You're my dad now." Tubbo mumbled into Scar's suit jacket. "Huh?" Scar asked, ruffling Tubbo's fluffy hair. "You are my dad now." Tubbo repeated, hugging Scar closer. "Oh! Ok!" Scar chuckled, hugging Tubbo closer. "You wanna see a magic trick?" Scar asked. Tubbo nodded and let Scar go. The older pulled Tubbo to the window and motioned for him to look outside. "Don't look away from the boatem hole." Scar said, watching Tubbo's intense stare. 

The vex/wizard smiled and conjured up a fountain of bees for Tubbo. "Woah! You can do that!?" Tubbo yelled turning to Scar ans shrieking. Scar's eyes always turned white when he uses his magic, but Tubbo didn't know that! "Where'd your eyes go!?" Tubbo yelled, shaking Scar. "Ack! Sorry! Forgot to tell you about the eye thing!" Scar said, laughing as his eyes went back to green. Tubbo sighed and looked back at the bees obliterating the phantoms. "Oh, I forgot about that too!" Scar chuckled. "About what?" Tubbo asked. "Any living thing I conjure up protects me and those I care about." Scar hummed. "And that includes you and your friends." Scar said. 

Scar is the best dad anyone could've asked for. Minus the constantly dying part.

Chapter Text

"Apprentice!" Impulse screamed into his spacious factory. Purpled slid down from the candy slide he begged Impulse to install. "You called?" Purpled asked, startling Impulse. "Gah! You're silent! I need to put bells on you or something!" Impulse chuckled. "But I'm not a cow..." Purpled said. "Or a cat..." The alien boy continued. Impulse smiled fondly at the alien's muttering. "Purp. I need you to do me a big favor." Impulse said. "What is it?" Purpled asked, his attention snapping back to the confectioner. "I need you to take these iDimpy bars to a good friend of mine. Just head southwest from here and you'll see his base." Impulse said. "Why can't you go?" Purpled asked. 

"I haven't slept for a while, Purpled... Phantoms are literally camping outside of here." Impulse said. "Can't you wait until morning?" Purpled asked. "I would if I could... But we have a giga base to build..." Impulse said. Purpled huffed and took the bars. "Will you pay me again?" Purpled asked. "Whatever you want." Impulse said. "Ok... 9 stacks of honeycomb would be nice!" Purpled yelled as he left the factory. "I hope he doesn't take a bite out of Wels' roof... Or a bite out of any build on this server." Impulse chuckled.

Purpled seemed to hit it off with Wels when he returned to the factory! The boy was carrying ten shulker boxes of minerals! Granted he was missing 10 diamonds, but Impulse assumed he paid Wels for it... Until he remembered Wels eats diamonds and diamond blocks/ores. "I've gotta hide my diamonds now, don't I?" Impulse chuckled, watching Purpled open a shulker and pull out a copper ore block the size of his head with a wide smile and a happy shimmer in his eyes.

~~~

"Why're you two fighting?" Grian groaned as Dream and Tommy played a game of tug-of-war with a barrel full of kelp. Why did they want kelp in the first place? "Tommy won't let me have the kelp for the aquarium!" Dream huffed, not letting go of the barrel. "This bitch doesn't know how to build an aquarium!" Tommy yelled back. "Neither do you!" Dream shot back. Grian sighed and facepalmed. He did ask for this...

I mean, if you think about it, if Grian had made Dream live with Pearl, maybe these two wouldn't be fighting, but that would also mean Nightmare would be the pain in Pearl's ass, and she's just getting used to being a hermit and not a runaway watcher like himself. "Both of you drop the kelp, now!" Grian yelled. He never usually yelled at people, sans Scar since the vex always did something backward or wrong, but this time he needed to. The mobs outside his base stopped in their tracks and decided going towards the alleyway was a sure-fire death wish. 

"But Uncle!" Tommy yelled. Dream dropped his hands from the barrel, letting the weight of it pull Tommy to the ground. "Ack!" Tommy yelped as his body slowly descended to the ground. "That was dramatic for a very slow fall... Anyway! You both are making the aquarium." Grian said. "What!?" Dream and Tommy yelled. "You heard me. In order for you two to get along... I'm forcing quality time." Grian said. "Now I feel like I have a new brother." Tommy said. "Well, we're all blonde here, so it doesn't matter, eh?" Grian said, moving the two over to his blue building. 

"Now, We only need to cover the windows. The rest could be left alone." Grian said. "What if I wanna put a dolphin in there?" Tommy asked. "Then you'd need me." Dream said. "The fuck?" Tommy said. "Did you not hear from Sapnap?" Dream asked. "I haven't heard. What is it?" Grian said. "Every time I get a dolphin to swim, six more join." Dream said. "You mean you're like a mermaid?" Scar yelled from above. This startled all three of the blond men.

Tubbo ran over to Tommy and hugged him. "Scar's my dad now!" Tubbo smiled. "Is he better than... You-know-who?" Tommy asked. Tubbo nodded and helped Scar land. Scar still managed to float into the same wooden sign from before. "Scar! How do you still crash when gravity's all messed up?" Grian laughed. "I don't know! But I'm glad I got you to smile! Do you like how I did my spot?" Scar asked, yelping when Dream climbed up the building's side and helped him down. "Where are your harnesses!?" Scar huffed. "I do this while running from my friends... I'm used to it by now." Dream said. "You need better hobbies..." Scar said. "Why do you think I have him building?" Grian said. "Oh! You mean he's also getting a space to call home!?" Scar beamed. "Anyway! Aquarium!" Grian shouted. Dream slid down the building and hopped over to where Grian and Tommy stood. "I leave you three to it! Scar and I have to make sure his mountains are alright." Grian said, pulling Scar by the hat outside.

"You think they're dating?" Tommy asked. "Oh, ew... That would mean if they got married, Grian would be my dad too!" Tubbo said. "At least you guys have a family you remember." Dream said. "Aren't you related to DreamXD and Drista?" Tommy asked. "Like I said. That. You. Remember." Dream said. Tubbo smiled and hugged Dream. "Don't worry, you have us now!" Tubbo smiled. "Back to making an Aquarium! Tubbo, Tommy, you go look for fish and stuff!" Dream said, wiggling free from Tubbo and running to Grian's block monster. 

The minors smirked and rushed at Dream. They seem to like this Dream more than the one they met before.

~~~

"Mr. Mumbo... How do you use these things?" Ranboo asked Mumbo, messing with the Elytra he had on his back. "Well, you glide with them." Mumbo said. "Huh?" Ranboo said. "Just jump and let the wind carry you." Mumbo said. "You sound like me." Grian said. "Who do you think I learned it from?" Mumbo shot back. "True. Anyway, you ready to make that highway that connects all the bases together yet?" Grian asked. Scar tumbled to a stop next to Ranboo. 

"Hi Ranboo! I see you have an Elytra on! You ready to fly yet?" Scar asked. "I-I'm still learning... How do you and Mumbo do this so effortlessly?" Ranboo said. "They use rockets or fireworks, but Mumbo over here has wings now. Courteous gift from me!" Grian said. "What!? Why didn't you get me some?" Scar said, making Grian and Mumbo begin to sweat. "Maybe Grian only had one set to give and figured Mumbo would need them more?" Ranboo said. "Favoritism..." Scar huffed.

"Back to the highway, yes. I am so ready to make this." Mumbo said. "C-Can I join? I-I'd like to see more of Boatem..." Ranboo said. "Of course! The more hands, the better!" Scar beamed. Ranboo smiled and let the three adults yap about whatever they needed. Ranboo looked off the edge of the layer of Mumbo's base they were currently on with a curious look. 

"Maybe I should try? There's water below, so I should be safe?" Ranboo said. "Wait... I can't touch water!" Ranboo panicked. He slinked into Grian's base. He found Dream there and took a breath in. "Face your fears." He repeated to himself. He got that from one of Mumbo's many inspirational quotes. "Um... Dream?" Ranboo asked. The other tensed and turned around.

"Oh... Hello." Dream said, hiding behind the black stained glass in his hands. "Are you ok?" Ranboo asked. "Honestly? No." Dream said, speed walking away from Ranboo. "What's wrong?" The younger asked. Despite the trauma involving Dream... Wait, was that even Dream? That Dream had fangs... This one doesn't... "I'm feeling very uncomfortable in my own skin right now." Dream said, itching at his neck. "Ack! D-Don't do that! That gives you scars! And I have too many already!" Ranboo panicked. "I'll stop." Dream said. Ranboo moved a little closer to Dream, but the other stepped back. "I wish I could remember you. I mean... I remember you from MCC, but I don't remember anything else." Dream sniffled, holding his head. 

"I don't remember much anyway!" Ranboo beamed, making Dream look at him with a look that spelled 'Nightmare really fucked you up' if you were looking close enough. The enderling stayed by Dream, helping him plan out the aquarium to the best of his abilities, flying off to find blocks to test (He really wanted to see how the other hermits used Elytras and if he could use it just as well. Answer is kinda?), rushing to get whatever Boatem member Dream told him to get. Turns out, Ranboo learned Dream wasn't human at all! He was an ender dragon hybrid!

~~~

Not the audience didn't know or anything... You guys do read the tags, right? Oh! Sorry! Writer's breaking fourth wall, again! Haha! Ok, back to the story!!

~~~

"Tubbo! I'm home!" Scar yelled. He looked at Jellie, who was curled up on her bed, asleep. Scar cooed at how cuddly Jellie looked. She kind of reminded him of a melted pillow. A small knocking sound came from the composter to Scar's left. The vex opened the trapdoor on top of the composter and saw Tubbo sitting in it. 

"Tubbo? How did you move the potted plant on top of this to get inside this and move it back?" Scar asked. "The plant was on top of me!? What!?" Tubbo squawked. "I'm guessing Tommy or Grian put it on top of your hidey-hole because it was out of place." Scar said. Tubbo nodded and climbed out of the box. The boy waited for Scar to give him a hug before falling asleep. Tubbo liked to sleep on the floor, especially since he didn't know which beds in Boatem were rigged to blow up and which weren't. Scar didn't blame Tubbo and did the same most days. Either he collapsed in the middle of Boatem, or on his starter base's floor.

The next morning, Scar woke up and noticed Tubbo was missing. Again. "Dagnabit! Where'd he go!?" Scar panicked. The vex was running around his base. Curse him for making it so big! He heard a familiar bleat and flew towards it. Tubbo has managed to wedge himself in the space that seperated the Hat factory's fabrics from the machine. "Oh my gosh! Tubbo!!" Scar yelped, tugging Tubbo's sleeping form out from there. 

How was he still asleep!? He even drooled all over Scar while the other carried him to Grian's base. Honestly, with how often Scar visits the prankster... The line of being neighbors and practically living with the other is becoming blurred. Wait... Is Tubbo chewing on Scar's hat?

Scar! Your hat!!!

Chapter Text

Georgenotfound has joined the game

DreamXD has joined the game

<Tommyinnit: Gogy!>

<Sapnap: George!>

<Ranboo: Oh good>

<Ranboo: Jesus is here>

<Ranboo: Time to sin>

<Tubbo_: Ranboo>

<Tommyinnit: Is Drista with you guys?>

<Docm77: More new people?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Man, this feels like a party!>

GoodtimeswithScar was struck by lightning

<Georgenotfound: XD!>

<DreamXD: You told me to the life of the party>

<Dream: That's not how you do it stupid>

 George chuckled after seeing Dream's response in the chat. DreamXD, or Exdee, stared at George. "Are we going to find Dream and stay?" The god asked. "Let's see if we can find the admin first," George said. "He's here!" Xisuma said, waving at the two. “Is that a-” George got out before Xisuma sighed. “Yes, I’m an axolotl. Don’t worry.” Xisuma said. Exdee hummed and floated around Xisuma. 

“A Voidwalker… I haven’t seen one of your kind in… Such a long time.” Exdee hummed. "Oh, it's gonna be one of those days..." Xisuma sighed, groaning. "I'm assuming you're here to see your old server mates?" Xisuma said, ignoring the god next to him. "I was actually wondering if I could see Dream... Um... Our last meeting wasn't good..." George said.

Xisuma nodded his head and held up a finger, then he opened up his communicator.

<Xisuma: Boatem>

<Grian: Yes X-eye-suma>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Did you figure out why the moon is big? Or why all the blocks around us are floating? Or why gravity is messed up?>

<PearlescentMoon: What's going on?>

<ImpulseSV: Grian, what did you do?

<Grian: What did I do!?>

<Dream: Wow... You're already getting blamed for something?>

<Tommyinnit: Wait, do we count as Boatem?>

<Tubbo_: Help>

<Tubbo_: Beedubs has escaped!>

<Ranboo: Beedubs?>

<MumboJumbo: Bdubs>

<MumboJumbo: How did you get Tubbo to name a bee after you!?>

<BDoubleO100: All I did was tell him the name of my horse!>

<Purpled: Yes, because Lulu Stupid Moron is a good name for a horse>

<Grian: On Hermitcraft>

<Xisuma: We have someone wanting to see Dream.>

<Dream: Nope! I'm hiding!>

<Xisuma: Can any of you spare a few minutes of your time escorting George to Boatem?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: I can!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Let me find my hat first!>

<Grian: I've got the hat of the all-mighty Scar's>

<Grian: I have the power>

Grian blew up 

<ImpulseSV: Bird's down>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Why did my hat fall from the sky?>

Xisuma sighed as the entirety of Boatem and Bdubs tried to convince Dream to not hide and convince Grian not to start a faction wide death game again. Boatem has been blown up too many times already. "He seems so happy here..." George said. "Well, he's been through a lot... Might I ask what happened?" Xisuma said. "I don't even know. Everything happened so fast that I lost track of what was happening." George said. "It's true. When I decided to visit their home, I found George looking lost." Exdee said. "Oh..." Xisuma said. "It didn't help that George lost a bet to my sister." Exdee said. "Is that sister Drista?" Xisuma said. "Oh! So you know of her here?" Exdee inquired.

"No, but Tommy tells me all about his adventures with her whenever we have a therapy session together." Xisuma said. "Oh god, It's you again." The three heard. "Technoblade?" George said. "Ah, it's the pig. Where is your crow?" Exdee said. "I dunno. I'm still mad at you for breaking my syndicate's table." Techno said. "I thought you were going to the end!" Exdee defended.

Techno shrugged and took his sword. "Hey, Axolotl. I'm going out to see if there are any roaming mobs to kill. Be back by morning." Techno said. "Be careful! And remember, when the voices demand blood, go to Boatem. They have a phantom problem." Xisuma yelled after Techno who made an affirmative grunt. "He... He didn't even growl at us?" George said. "He's come a long way... You have no idea how many times it took for him to even acknowledge my existence. He always just ignored me." Xisuma said. 

"Huh...Back on the SMP, he'd threaten to take our last canon life if we dared to see him." George said. "Thankfully, you can die as much you want here." Xisuma said. "Wait, what?" George said. "Mhm. One of our players has almost 300 deaths!" Xisuma chuckled. George stared at Xisuma while his communicator pinged.

Sapnap whispers to you: Georgie!

You whisper to Sapnap: Hi Sapnap

Sapnap whispers to you: Did you know these guys can go to the end?

Sapnap whispers to you: And they have stores where you can buy a lot of things for diamonds!

George smiled Sapnap's whispers. He missed having a goofy, carefree Sapnap. Back on the SMP, the youngest of their friend group was angry, distant, and a troublemaker. Now he seems like he is when they used to do manhunts and participate in MCC. "Exdee... I want you stay by me this whole time. Do not use your powers anymore. You've already struck someone with lightning as your hello." George said.

Exdee nodded their orb headand floated to George's right side. Scar came flying in a few minutes later. The moon was already close to setting by the time he made it. "Hello!" Scar said. "Ah, You're the one who got hit by lightning." George said. "And I'm assuming you're the one who summoned it?" Scar said, looking at Exdee. "Why is a vex on your server, Axolotl?" Exdee growled. "Now now. Most of the players here are endangered hybrids. Scar is one of the last few peaceful vex hybrids left." Xisuma said. 

"Aw, Thank you X!" Scar sniffed. "Anywho! My name is Scar, and I will be your reliable tour guide!" Scar said. George smiled when Xisuma began to laugh while Exdee huffed. The god decided to shrink to his blob form and sit on George's right shoulder. That was something Dream used to do when he was around... Scar noticed George's sadness and smiled. "Come along, dear Georgenotfound! We have an adventure to embark on!" Scar said.

"Are you always this energetic?" George asked. "Yes? I mean, I was wheelchair bound for most of my childhood, then one day, I can walk!" Scar lied. Ok, it was a white lie. Most of the statement was true! He just left out the fact that his parents were slaughtered during a raid and every child in the village he grew up in was taken and experimented on. He, Cub and Bdubs were the only few who managed to escape before it was too late. Granted, Scar has cool magic that can make Grian want to strangle him, but hey! That's all good.

Cub and Bdubs got the painless process. Cub became a shapeshifter and Bdubs' genetics rejected all of the altercations besides his haterd for the dark... Hold up... Is he considered a glare hybrid then!? That explains why he sleeps a lot and has the big eyes and smile in the day time. 

Scar brought George all the way to Boatem using the nether highway, since he was pretty sure the phantoms that littered Boatem would rip them to shreds if they walked on foot. When Scar poked his head out from the portal, a phantom whizzed by him. Thank void that Grian was good with a bow. Somewhat. 

"Scar! Get your butt over here this instance!" Grian huffed. "Ok! Hold on! We've got company!" Scar yelled, pulling his head back into the portal and instructing George to go towards the blonde man in a red jumper. The other nodded and did so after Scar motioned for him to follow him through the portal. 

"How come you guys haven't slept!?" George yelled. "Our moon has grown huge and our valiant ex-CEO suggested we should not sleep to please the moon... Grian over here is a-" Scar said before Exdee flew in front of Grian's face. "Watcher!" Exdee yelled. "Hello." Grian said, looking at Exdee, then George, then Scar. "Woah... The god knows you're a watcher too..." Scar said. 

"What's a watcher?" George asked. "They're like your blob, but they mostly watch how servers function, and rarely intervene." Scar said. "Why is he here then?" George asked. "I may have ran away..." Grian said. "And killed one of them." Exdee said. "You really need to stop that, Exdee." Grian said. "You know each other?" George yelled. "Somewhat. Watchers and gods are almost the same, Watchers can possess players, gods can influence them." Grian said. "Exdee, are you influencing me?" George asked. "What does that mean again?" Exdee said. Scar nodded and looked at Grian.

"By influence, I mean they give you a command and if you do not follow it, bad things happen." Grian said. "You mean like the pink haired fighter that X gives therapy to?" Scar asked. "Yes! The voices in his head is an influence of a god from a past server he was on." Grian said. Scar nodded and looked at George, who was holding Exdee. The blob shook his head. The phantoms began to screech in pain, meaning the sun had risien.

"Well then, I gues you're here for Dream." Grian said. George nodded and Grian smiled. "Come with me." Grian said, walking towards Impulse's factory. George's mouth hung open. "Is this your house!?" George asked. "Hm? What? Oh, no. Mine is the oversized crack in the wall over there by the train." Grian said, pointing to the alleyway. "Scar's is the line of wagons and those mountains there and there." The blond continued pointing to Scar's multiple bases. "This one is our friend's base. His name is Impulse, and he's gotten much better at building." Scar said. "Yep! And I know Dream loves to hide in Impulse's base." Grian said. "Like Tubbo?" Scar asked. "Tubbo's here too?!" George asked. "Do you know Ranboo, Tommy and Purpled too?" Grian asked. "Tommy, yes. Ranboo and Purled are the two I've had like an introduction to." George said. "You poor soul." Grian said.

They entered Impulse's factory and were immeadiatle tackled by any Boatem member in there. "G!" Tubbo yelled, bopping his head onto Grian's. "Tubbo! Tommy! Ranboo! Purpled! Hello again!" Grian said. "Gogy!" Tommy yelled, shaking George's head. Grian internally cheered that George finally got to experience Tommy's sense of greeting. Ranboo and Purpled smiled at them before getting off them. The adults however? They clung to Grian and Scar. 

"Scar... Why didn't you tell us Tubbo gets stuck in weird places?" Pearl asked. "I did! Didn't you hear me before lightning hit me?" Scar asked. "No." All three of the adults said. Why three you ask? Dream is currently hiding in Impulse's industrial sized jelly bean container. Grian managed to wiggle free of Mumbo's iron grip and see where Dream is. He went over to the green eyed ender dragon's hiding spot and sat by him.

"Your friend is here to talk." Grian said. "I don't think so... He's probably here to drag me back there... Sam would." Dream said. "I'm not so sure. All of us hermits would rather die fighting to keep you safe." Grian said. "Trust me. I can tell he misses you. Give him a chance." Grian said. Dream huffed and grabbed some of the jelly beans and shoved them in his hoodie pocket. "Don't tell Impulse." Dream said.

"Don't worry, I steal candy from all the time." Grian said, grabbing a handful for himself and popping a few in his mouth. "Ooh... Strawberry-lime... Impulse must be making those flavour changing jellies again." Grian said. "So that's why their colors never matched their flavor..." Dream said. "Up up. Come on." Grian said, getting up and going over to the opening of the container. Dream followed and sighed, pulling his hood over his head. 

When they got to the foyer, Dream made eye contact with George. Shaded brown eyes met lively green ones. "Dream?" George said. "Uh... Hi." ream said, waving. Exdee hopped off George's shoulder and changed back into his human-ish form. "Greetings, Dream." Exdee said, noticing Dream's confusion. "I've notice a difference in you." Exdee said, Dream finally getting the message.

You whispers to Grian: Grian, does he know?

Grian whispers to you: He's a god from your old server. He's bound to notice Nightmare's existence

You whisper to Grian: But what if he erases me?

Grian whispers to you: Then we will bring you back. I promise. 

Dream looks at Grian who nodded towards Exdee. "Is that a good thing?" Dream asked. "With how it used to be to now? Exponentially." Exdee said. "Why is there so much smart words coming out of his mouth?" Scar questions, resting his head on Tubbo's like any weird father would do to their son, who was obviously falling asleep. "He's a god, Scar... What'd you expect?" Grian said. 

"Eye candy." Scar replied. "We have Mumbo for that!" Impulse yelled, pointing to the man in the suit. "Excuse me what?" Mumbo said. "First I'm CEO, then I'm the janitor, and now I'm eye candy?" Mumbo asked. "I mean if we're going based on looks right now, Mumbo's kind of losing attractiveness with how long he hasn't slept, Pearl on the other hand? She's fine. You know, she can defy the moon?" Impulse said. "I thought we said we weren't going to tell anyone." Pearl said. 

"And Bdubs didn't betray me for a goddamn clock." Impulse said. "1 diamond in the swear jar!" Grian said.

"Dammit..."

"Impulse!"

Chapter Text

"Scar! Build the rocket!" Grian yelled. 

Yeah, Hermitcraft was not having a good time. The moon is too big, the floor was tearing itself apart, gravity is all wonky, mobs are making sense... Good thing id that Dream finally got his base done! His redstone is working, His color palette works with the alleyway, and he's made friends with the dragon egg!

Exdee has told him about the server's moon problem and all the odd effects that have happened, not that Dream really listened. He was more worried about how'd they'd get off the server before the moon decided it was time to end it all. Grian did mention to him that the moon wasn't having any luck in finding that thing. 

So here all the residents were. At spawn with Dream in the middle, shaking in fear. Sapnap may have mentioned that Tommy mentioned Dream had made a portal that brought them to the server. "Uh... Hello everyone." Dream said, waving to everyone. Sapnap smiled and waved back while George nodded. Techno blinked at him while Phil continued to observe the sky. The minors were busy being distracted by the Boatem members that they were told to stay by. 

Ranboo was with Mumbo, Tommy with Grian, Tubbo with Scar, and Purpled with Impulse. Pearl acted as their mother figure who would scold them if he needed to. Tubbo even took to calling her MommaMoon. Not that that made her heart melt when Tubbo would say that. No, definitely not!

"What's up, Dream?" Sapnap asked. "As you can tell... The moon is big. And... I'm guessing you all remember how we got here?" Dream said. "You mean zapping us in a portal and having us land here?" Sapnap hummed. "Yeah, that." Dream said. "Are you thinking about trying again?" Xisuma asked. "Y-Yes? I know last time was a fluke, but this time, I think I've got the hang of it now!" Dream said. "Oh? How'd that happen?" Phil asked.

"Boatem people are more persistent than they seem... Scar almost bit me one time..." Dream said. "I hadn't eaten that day! It was one time!" Scar defended, while Tubbo casually chewed on his coat. "Anywho! I think I can get us out of here. Do you guys have all the things you'd like to take?" Dream said. "I take Goose everywhere now." Gem said, holding her cat close. "Jellie's here! She's uh... Where is that cat?" Scar said, looking around. Jellie meowed from his feet. "There she is!" Scar cooed, allowing Jellie to climb up his back. "Gellie is here too." Grian said. Tommy hugged the cat and even kissed his head, much to the cat's dismay. 

Dream nodded and looked at all hermits, who nodded and smiled. "Ok... Um... Are you ready?" Dream asked. "You got this Elsa!" Bdubs teased. "Elsa?" Dream questioned. "It's a reference to the end of the first Frozen." Scar said. "Like a true mayor." Grian teased. "Are we doing that again?" Mumbo asked. "No." Scar said. "But I liked the Turf war!" Etho huffed. "Because you were on the winning side." False grumbled. "Good times." Etho said.

Dream smiled and summoned a portal in the middle. "Lemme check it real quick." Dream said, poking his head through. He pulled it out and said. "We're good to go! Let's go, before we become dust!" He said. The hermits did so, thanking Dream for the portal. He was the last to go in.

After one last glimpse, he smiled at this server and thanked it for bringing him peace. Maybe in their next world, he can have a cake business or something.

Chapter Text

The group spawned into the new world in the middle of a warm ocean biome. 

"Well, this is a start!" Xisuma chuckled. "I-I'm so sorry, guys!" Dream yelped, spitting out water. Tommy and Tubbo giggled, splashing each other with water. Ranboo teleported to dry land, that was 70 or so blocks away. Purpled floated on his back, staring at the sky with a dazed look. "Whatever is nudging my foot, I will eat you." Purpled said.

A small blue axolotl squeaked and smacked Purpled's arm and swam towards Dream. "Hi, lil' guy! I love you too!" Dream smiled, closing his left eye while the axolotl rubbed its face all over his cheek. "That is so adorable... Scar, don't you even think about it." Cub said, noticing Scar's intense stare. "But!" Scar said, humming after Cub gave him the look of 'Don't test me.' 

Something that the additions had noticed about Scar is that he will stare someone down if he wants to interact with them. Tubbo never needed to worry about it since he clung to the older man all the time or hid in an odd space. Dream may have experienced this when he was roaming around Boatem and made eye contact with Scar's big green eyes. Then came a body, similar to his own, slamming into him. When they say good times, with Scar, anytime is more than good! Not it that way, ya freaks.

The axolotl squeaked and splashed at Dream, who smiled and splashed back softly. Another squeak came from it, and it began to tug at Dream's hoodie string. Sapnap huffed when he saw an axolotl being more cozy for Dream than him. He was a literal walking teddy bear! Well, Bdubs always told him that. He never knew his tiny frame was that cozy..

"Can you show us to land? Please?" Dream asked the axolotl, who blinked and slinked down below the surface. "There goes our hope." Tango sighed. "Well, Think of it this way! If we find a shipwreck, it's free game." Grian said. "So, Mumbo! Are you killing things again?" Pearl asked. How are these guys holding a conversation while treading water? "Yeah, I'm not doing that again..." Mumbo said

"You gotta admit though, your screams when we gave you dead things and their remains was priceless." Impulse said. "You wore a chicken head!" Mumbo yelled, sputtering when Tubbo splashed water at him. Scar snickered at Mumbo's garbled yelp and yelped when Tommy did the same to him.

A few minutes later a loud squeak was heard followed by many more. Dream's axolotl poked its head out from the water and squeaked at Dream. "Oh! You came back! Do you know where any land is?" Dream asked. The small amphibian squealed and many other axolotls poked their heads from the water. "I told you he was a Disney Princess, George!" Sapnap yelled. 

"Shut it, Sapnap! Besides, it was him who called himself one." George said. "Still... He's one." Sapnap sniffled. Void, sometimes Sapnap can be so wholesome and squishable... And other times he can be a pain in the ass that you'd want to throw into the ocean. He tends to ping pong between the two. The axolotls squeaked and bumped their heads against each of the water-bond players' arms they were near.

The yellow one by George bit at his hands just because they could. "Oh my-! I'm swear, you are like Dream!" George said. "What's that supposed to mean!?" Dream gasped, his axolotl making a similar gurgle. "I think the one by him is more like him, quite honestly." Mumbo said. "And once again, you've confused me, Mr. Jumbo..." Scar said. 

The axolotls began to mush the players to where Ranboo had began to collect things for... Survival? "Ranboo!" Tubbo screamed, swimming towards the shore with the axolotl that was fortunate enough to know left from right after being shaken around by Tubbo's swimming technique. The poor thing clung to Tubbo's bee hat. Wait... He's the only one of Boatem who brought their hat!

Scar's heart swelled in happiness and nostalgia. The side effects of being a father figure and the son figure you have is Tubbo minus the chaos. "You guys aren't dead! Awesome!" Ranboo cheered, going back to sitting in front of his furnace to watch his steak cook. The group made it to the shore and heaved from the swim. Ranboo was generous enough to make a shack big enough for the group to hide out and regain their strength while the nighttime mobs raved on. 

By raved, the group meant it. All they could hear were the sounds of hostile mobs fighting and moving from beyond the cobblestone and dirt box that was the shack. "So... No sheep?" Grian asked Ranboo. "Yeah... But I did find a skeleton spawner!" Ranboo said. "Ooh! A XP grinder!" the redstone nerds all said. "I love how their first thought was 'Oh good! early XP!'" Ren said. "You have wolf ears?" Purpled asked. "He's a werewolf, it's getting close to the full moon, right?" Doc said.

"Mhm..." Ren nodded. "So he was the bipedal wolf that managed to break into Grian's Goofery and Gaffery!?" Grian yelled. "I thought you knew from season 6!?" Ren said. "You said that you hadn't changed in ten years!" Grian said. "I was smelly for a reason!" Ren groaned. "What kind of- Oh..." Grian said, the realization of what might've happened. "What did you kill!!?" Grian yelled. Ren shrugged and smiled. 

"Dream?" Exdee said, making everyone jump in surprise. Yes, even George jumped. "Jesus!" Ranboo yelped. "My name isn't Jesus?" Exdee said. "No, that was our god." Grian said, making every hermit look at him. They didn't really have a god and Exdee knew that, but he let it slide, much to George's dismay. "Really!? You don't liked being lied to and you let him slide!?" George said. "You told me that there are things to ignore. I simply ignored him." Exdee said. "I swear..." George said. "And he says I'm dramatic." Sapnap huffed.

The group sat and chatted while the sun just barely breached the horizon. "Nighttime sure is long..." Bdubs said. "You're not used to it, Bdubs." Tango said. "He sleeps through it!" Cleo said. "Like in third life?" Impulse said. "What happened to not talking about it?" Scar asked. "That died once Last life came and went... I still can't look at Bdubs or Etho without wanting to throw my things and run." Grian said. "I said I was sorry!" Bdubs said. "Now I want to know more..." Tubbo said. 

"You really don't." Phil said. "Yeah... It'll remind you of... Those times." The avian said. The sound of zombies burning alerted the group that it was day time. "Alright group! Now that our fiasco of a start has been dealt with, how about we start gathering resources and start a new?" Xisuma said. "Season 8.2!" Scar yelled, tossing his arms up in the air. All the axolotls had left, but one stayed. And that one was Dream's. 

The little one had already adopted the blonde forgetful disney princess. They even nudged his arm and squeaked loudly for attention. Like a cat! "Reminds me of Patches..." Sapnap said. The axolotl perked up at the mention of Patches before bouncing into Dream's lap and squeaking loudly. "They've chosen their name. Patches the Axolotl! First the cat, and now the axolotl. All we need now is every other mob." Sapnap said. 

"I like that. Patches..." Dream said, picking the axolotl up and smiling when its tongue stuck out from its mouth. So cute! 

~~~

Resource gathering was fun! George got stuck in a tree after he climbed up to get an apple, Sapnap set it on fire by accidentally scraping his nails against the bark, and Dream had to keep Patches on his head while this played out. Techno and Phil helped put out the fire while the minors stuck with the former Boatem crew.

The now new hermits joined them, minus Techno and Phil. Those two wandered away after the fire. The five decided that since season 8 was so short, that Boatem was moving to this new season. Grian seemed to be the leader (again?) on picking out where Boatem 2.0 would be. Last time it was north, this time, they went south. Yep... 

SOUTH.

"So... What should this Boatem pole look like? Rickety or stable?" Scar asked, watching Mumbo punch a chicken to death. Hey, Season 8 is done, which meant peace, love, and plants is null and void, ok? Besides, his middle name is Killsalot. What more do you expect from this man? "Ooh! Feathers!" Tubbo cheered, placing them in his hat. Why does he still have it? Logically, it'd disappear with their last world, but nope... Tubs seemed to break logic.

Patches had taken a liking to Tubbo's hat and began to pester Dream about it. "Patches... I don't know where you could get one. I'll ask." Dream told the amphibian in their bucket of water. Patches made bubbles in the water. "Tubbo, Patches wants to know where your hat came from." Dream said. "Papa Scar!" Tubbo said. "Better now Patches?" Dream asked the axolotl. A small squeak was heard and Dream nodded. "Oh! A ravine! Remember, we don't have any elytra on us, and my wings have to grow back." Grian said. Dream, George, and Sapnap didn't listen to the last part. All they heard was ravine and they jumped in. Dream used Patches' bucket as a water bucket to break their fall and to let Patches explore a little. He then dug a 3 by 3 hole and dumped the bucket in there.

"You guys can make it! I believe in you!" He said. The minors were next, Tubbo and Tommy jump and flail their arms while Ranboo teleported down there. "They've gotten better at teleporting..." Mumbo said. "At least he's not chucking grass blocks at us too..." Impulse said. "We told you not to look in his eyes when they're purple." Pearl said. Purpled sat by the ledge, stuck. "I want to go down there, but I might eat everything there..." Purpled said.

"How about I give you all my diorite?" Iskall said from behind the group, causing the group to jump down the ravine in a flurry. "Iskall! How dare you!?" Grian huffed, shaking his head to free of any water. Iskall laughed and made their way down the ravine safely. Something the Boatem crew was terrible at.

Safety? Who's she? Never heard of her. "Oh my god! Slimes!" Sapnap yelled, running to kill the big ones and keeping the small squishy ones. He returned with one small one and nuzzled it. How was it not burning his flesh off? No one knew. "This is my pet slime. I'm naming it kotópoulo." Sapnap said. "Why'd you name it chicken?" Dream said. "Dammit, I forgot you learned Greek just to understand what I'm saying half the time. I zoí me miseí." Sapnap said. 

"Life loves you." Grian said. "You too!?" Sapnap yelled. "I'm a watcher. They forced me to learn things I didn't want to learn." Grian said. "Now I don't have a leg up on anybody here..." Sapnap grumbled. "You have a pet slime!" Impulse said. "He's got a point." Mumbo and Pearl said, cheering Sapnap up. Grian pat at the walls of the ravine and smiled.

"I think this is a great place for Boatem 2.0... We've got a good location..." Grian said. The others agreed, but before they could begin gathering resources, all of their communicators pinged.

Quackity  has joined the game

Awesamdude  has joined the game

<Awesamdude: Where is he?>

Chapter Text

Every hermit, new and old, stared at their communicator. Thoughts rang through their minds, many curious, a select few dangerous. Doc's thoughts were instantly death and destruction. Not to mention that the hermits attempted to figure out which 'he' they meant.

<GoodtimeswithScar: Who's he?>

<Grian: Can you describe this he>

<Rendog: How'd they get in here?>

<Iskall85: Is it too early for alcohol yet?>

<Stressmonster101: In the season or in general>

<Xisuma: Hello?>

<Awesamdude: Tell us where Dream is>

<Quackity: Where the fuc ishe?>

<Cubfan135: No swearing please>

<iJevin: Someone has bad grammar>

<ZombieCleo: Something tells me that distant screech was one of these two.>

<Grian: No, that was Scar getting chased by cave spiders>

GoodtimeswithScar was slain by Boatem 2.0 Security

<ImpulseSV: It works!>

MumboJumbo fell from a high place

Grian blew up

<PearlescentMoon: How did you blow up!?>

<Grian: Miscaculated>

<Hypnotized: How did you do that?>

Sapnap held Dream as the blond struggled to breathe. They were here! He knew it! "Dream? Dream, listen to my voice. You're safe." George said, holding Dream close as the tallest heaved and shook. "Dream? What's going on?" Sapnap asked. Dream shook his head and buried his face into Sapnap's chest. This was the smallest George and Sapnap had seen Dream.

This was the first time they had seen him break down! Sapnap held onto Dream while the other cried and sobbed into his shirt. George pat his back and placed kisses on top of Dream's head while the hermits attempt to assess the situation and calm Quackity and Sam down. As much as they'd like to get into the conversation, they both know that would possibly endanger Dream. 

"You guys better get him somewhere safe." Grian said while he was covered in soot. The boys nodded and picked Dream up. Sapnap carried Dream, George directed them to his small little hole in the wall. The bed was blue, and that was all that was there. Just a bed and a sign with 'George's room GOGY' on it. Sapnap scratch out the official words and put GOGY on it. Yeah... Sapnap still has no filter.

The three sat on George's bed while Dream sobbed and squeaked nonsense. Patches even crawled her way to them and squeezed between their bodies and nuzzled Dream's teary face. Dream calmed down and held Patches close. Yes, they found out Patches was a she when they had a whole fleet of axolotls fall on top of them while they dug a hole for Dream's alcove. The males chased Patches around until she climbed up Dream and squealed for help. Now they each have their own tank while Patches has her own. 

~~~

Sam growled while Doc glared back. The hermits had returned to spawn, where Etho, Keralis, and False made an island. Doc, Ren, Wels, False, Beef, and xB had come to talk with the newcomers. The minute Doc set eyes on Sam, Ren had to hold him back from attacking the other. Quackity did the same, yelling at Sam in Spanish. False's hand instinctively went to her sword. "Hey, hey! Let's not fight!" xB said. "You say as you have no armor on." Wels snickered. "You don't either!" xB said. "We just want Dream, and we'll get out of your hair." Quackity said. 

"Something tells me that won't be it." Etho said. "Easy, Doc. Easy. You're smoking again." Ren said, petting Doc's head. The cybernetic creeper hybrid growled and tried to break free of Ren's hold, but to no avail. The werewolf had held Doc while he made himself calm down. "What makes you so sure this Dream person is here?" Wels asked. How is he so calm!? 

"Because, this server of yours has two admins. One of them is named Dream." Quackity said. Sam nodded and noticed how every one of the hermits tensed up. False secretly messaged Xisuma on her communicator.

FalseSymmetry whispers to you: They're not leaving

You whisper to FalseSymmetry: Let Doc and Ren go wild.

FalseSymmetry whispers to you: Are you sure?

You whisper to FalseSymmetry: Yep

False nodded at Wels, who did the same to xB, Beef, Etho, Doc, and Ren. They all knew that nod. That was their nod that told Doc and Ren to go crazy. Which they did... Ren jumped at Quackity while Doc took Sam. The others watched. They all knew from experience to never interfere when these two go feral. Think of two rabid cats fighting a hoard of rats. Chaotic?

~~~

Boatem made sure Dream was fine and fed Patches for him while he was passed out from crying. They all let out a sigh of relief when they all saw two death notifications pop up.

Awesamdude was slain by Docm77 [Assess and Explode]

Quackity was slain by Rendog using [Rage and Fury]

Chapter Text

Bdubs didn't expect Sapnap to hunt him down and beg him to tell him all about Hermitcraft and the past members and past seasons.

"B to the dubs!!" Sapnap yelled as he tackled Bdubs to the ground. "Ack! Hello there, Sappitus!" Bdubs smiled while he began the pet Sapnap's wild hair. "Ah! I see you have an Elytra on! Are the Boatem kiddos teaching you to fly?" Bdubs asked. Sapnap nodded and smiled. "Mhm! Although, Scar is a bit more accident-prone than you told me... He flew into a pillar of lava when he was teaching me close quarters flight... Grian and I had to get his stuff before it burnt!" Sapnap said. "It's all that vex magic that bouncin' around in his head. Don't worry, Sapnap. Now, what brings you here to my humble hole?" Bdubs asked, gesturing to the crater he's made. 

"I wanted to know more about the past seasons of Hermitcraft! I know I just popped out of nowhere in your lives, but me and my friends want to make a home here!" Sapnap said. "Well, You do have a point..." Bdubs said, going back to when Sapnap was funneled off from the spawn area he and his group of friends just popped into their lives and made living on Hermitcraft so much better. Despite the fact that their last home was demolished by the moon. 

"What'd you like to know?" Bdubs finally asked after that small emotional episode. "Well, Scar and I were talking, and he mentioned something called Moopop? When I asked him about it, he told me to ask you about it." Sapnap said. "Why do I feel like Scar pulled a 'Ask your mother' on you?" Bdubs asked. "I wouldn't know how that feels... I had two dads." Sapnap said.

"Oh? How about you tell me about them one day? But first! About Moopop." Bdubs said, motioning for Sapnap to follow him to his small home inside what looked to be a self-made dragon skull. "Ooh! Fancy!" Sapnap said. "Thank you! Here, you can sit by the fireplace while I make you something to drink, ok?" Bdubs said to Sapnap. 

He reminded Sapnap of Bad and Skeppy before that Egg decided to screw everything up. His adoptive dads were amazing! Bad couldn't cook to save the life of anyone, but he could bake! Skeppy was the other way around. Either way, his childhood was great until the SMP was founded and Dream invited him to join. Then... The ship of happiness sunk with him not being able to make it a lifeboat. 

The boy wandered over to Bdubs' fireplace and sat in front of it, making some fire appear in his hands before setting the logs in there ablaze. It wasn't cold, but Sapnap needed something to set on fire. You can only set George's cape on fire so many (5,936) times until it becomes repetitive. "When have you been able to set things on fire!?" Bdubs gawked, staring at Sapnap like he had found the boy in a snowstorm. 

"I've always been able to do this... I just don't often..." Sapnap said. Bdubs rolled his eyes and showed Sapnap his communicator.

Georgenotfound went up in flames

Georgenotfound burnt to a crisp whilst escaping Sapnap

Georgenotfound tried to swim in lava whilst escaping Sapnap using [Burn baby]

"OK, so I like to set George on fire... But that's because he has a god simping for him!" Sapnap said. "Sapnap... What did you promise me on our last world?" Bdubs asked. "Not to cause meaningless deaths often..." Sapnap said. "And have you held up to that promise?" Bdubs asked. "Nope." Sapnap said, popping the p. "Sap!" Bdubs scolded, bonking Sapnap's head with a stick he had lying around before sitting in front of the other. "Now, let's tell you about Moopop." Bdubs said, pulling out a scrapbook with the words 'Hermitcraft Season 7' on it.

~~~

Sapnap stared at the pictures of Bdubs and all the members from that season, seeing some familiar faces and ones he hadn't seen before in only a few sparingly. "Oh! Here we are! The beginning of our Moopop adventure. So you remember how on our last world, where we lived was where our shops were? Well, we used to have a centralized shopping area and all that! Anywho!" Bdubs said, pointing to a picture of him screaming with Grian's and Scar's names in first place during the head games. "Now, this isn't the start of it, but as you can see, we hermits are pretty competitive...." Bdubs said, flipping the pages to the point where there was one with Bdubs screaming at Scar at what looked like whack-a-mole.

"We had a whole turf war on the shopping district." Bdubs said, smiling even bigger when Sapnap scooted closer at stared at him like a child learning how their parents met. "About what? Did you guys' friendships burn!? How'd you make up?!" Sapnap rattled, shaking Bdubs by his shoulders. "Sapnap. Wars on Hermitcraft are just for fun. They pop up all over the place and over silly things like a chicken being renamed. But we all let it go and laugh about it later! Why?" Bdubs asked. "Oh... Our old server used to have so many wars over petty things like who burnt down who's lemon tree." Sapnap said. "Well, you don't have to worry about that. The only times we have wars are when we're all swamped with projects and need an event to destress. Most times that is handled by Grian. That blondie can be a menace full of chaos..." Bdubs said, shaking his head. "Moopop?" Sapnap reminded Bdubs before he went on a tangent about many things. 

Like clocks. That man could yap about clocks for so long, Sapnap's convinced he's fallen asleep to his speech about clocks about 27 times in the short time he's known Bdubs. "Oh! Anyway! Someone had a bright idea to have a mayoral run for mayor of the shopping district, and well..." Bdubs said, flipping back a few pages to see Scar hiding in a hole, crying. "Scar won by a landslide! 10 votes over all!" Bdubs said, smiling bigger than Sapnap thought possible. "And I was his vice mayor! Oh, those were the days! Grian used to call us the married couple of the shopping district... I hope he was joking." Bdubs said. "Anywho! Scar and I pledged we'd change the shopping district's mycelium with grass, and then... BAM! No mycelium! Until some started popping up here and there which lead to a whole resistance against grass!" Bdubs said, waving his arms around while Sapnap held the scrapbook. 

It always amazed Sapnap how animated Bdubs could get over a memory. "What then?" Sapnap asked. "Oh! Then we made an anti-organization, we called it the Hermit Environmental Protection, or H.E.P for short. Oh, it was so much fun! We'd have meetings, make plans on how to stomp out those mushroom weirdos, and then we found their headquarters! Well, a replica at first, and then we found the real one! Well, Scar kind of blew a hole in their roof... But still!" Bdubs said. Sapnap smiled as Bdubs told him all about H.E.P's layout and battle plans that never really did get a chance to see the light of day. 

"So, how did you resolve it?" Sapnap asked, sipping the hot cocoa Bdubs had given him during his little spiel. "Hm? Oh, every member of each side of the Turf war made a minigame. It had to be fair for each side to have a winning chance, but fun. The resistance won most of them sadly..." Bdubs said. "Oh, What happened afterwards?" Sapnap asked. "Well, we restored the shopping district back to grass, so I don't even know why we had a turf war in the first place... Maybe it was for laughs and giggles?" Bdubs said. Sapnap nodded as Bdubs motioned for him to follow him, yapping about how he was going to make a mine and wanted to know if Sapnap wanted to help.

Sam Nook  has joined the game

<Tommyinnit: SAM NOOK!!>

<Tommyinnit: Guys>

<Tommyinnit: It's Sam fucking Nook!>

<Grian: Who?>

<Tubbo_: Hold up, Sam Nook-Sam Nook?>

<Tommyinnit: YES>

<Tubbo_: SAM NOOK!!!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Is this a young kid thing?>

<Tinfoilchef: Are you calling us old?>

<Geminitay: Not Mumbo>

<PearlescentMoon: Yeah, he's a baby>

<MumboJumbo: We're the same age!>

<Xisumavoid: But you are younger than them by a few months>

<ImpulseSV: wasn't he like 17 when he joined?>

<MumboJumbo: STOP>

<MumboJumbo: PLS>

<Grian: Hey! You got him to shorten Please!>

<Sam Nook: Why am I here?>

<Tommyinnit: Welcome to recovery! How are you, Mr. Nook?>

<Sam Nook: Tommy? Tommy I'm scared...>

<Tubbo_: Tommy, go to spawn. I'm sure someone made an island there.>

<Tommyinnit: On it>

Tommy quickly ran to spawn and heaved when he saw a confused green tanuki bear looking around. "Sam Nook! Over here!" Tommy yelled, waving from the boat he was in. Sam Nook smiled and waddled towards the tall teen. It always amazed Tommy how the small bear reached his knees and the fact that he hasn't accidentally punt kicked the thing into oblivion. Now, Nook's creator was taller than Tommy, but Sam Nook was a whopping 2 foot tall tanuki bear who spoke Animal Crossing!

Come to think of it, it made sense for him to yap to Tommy about building techniques in Animal Crossing. Tommy swore up and down Grian and Scar spoke it too when they got on a building rage. All he heard was *Animal Crossing rambles* and those shocked emotes the villagers give off when they had that one trigger line. So much for a non-scripted game. Is it really non-scripted? Tommy didn't think so. He always wants to throw his switch across his base whenever fucking Agnes wants to talk with him (Sorry, for anyone who likes Agnes from Animal Crossing. I have her on my island and I want her GONE)

Tommy took Sam Nook with him in his boat back to Ravineworld. Yeah, they renamed it to that because Boatem was too nostalgic for the original members now... 

~~~

Slimenap squeaked as they hopped around Ravineworld. Scar had made it Slimenap-friendly so the poor guy couldn't slip off the walkways and onto the cold roof/floor of Ravineworld. He's already slipped twice and squealed for someone to help him back up. Each time, Mumbo had to pick them up in a bucket and carry them back to Sapnap's hidey hole. If you're curious to how he sounds, think of a small kitten who hasn't seen their human in 3 hours and is very loud. Yeah... He learned to copy noises after he accidentally ate a parrot Impulse brought down to Ravineworld.

The screams of agony that came from Impulse almost made him sad. Almost. The parrot tasted great in their opinion! A little rubbery, but still good! Slimenap squeaked at Patches, who squeaked back at him while he explored. Slimenap always noticed that the inhabitants of his new home look at him weird. It's not their fault the humanoid goofball who takes care of him put a friggin ten-gallon hat on him the same size of his body! Wait, would that make it a five-gallon hat then? It didn't matter much to him, since it made the small slime feel very snazzy. Like how his humanoid goofball called him when he placed the hat on him.

Of course, Slimenap still finds ways to get themselves in trouble. If it wasn't getting cornered by mobs, he was stuck in a hole... But this time? This time, he managed to get stuck in an old potion bottle in Scar's base. The slime couldn't really move it around, due to being terrified. Honestly, they were being chased by a spider! Adrenaline for slimes makes them do stupid shit! Like eating a parrot!

Slimenap spotted Scar wheeling himself inside his base. Why was he wheeling himself around you ask? His leg braces decided that today, of all the days on the server, would be the day they break. Granted, Slimenap has seen Scar crash land into his base so many times, it makes the slime wonder how the other hadn't broken their neck yet. A loud squeak from Slimenap made Scar stare at him. "How'd you get in there?" Scar asked, wheeling over to Slimenap's bottle and picking him up. 

Slimenap tried to explain how a big spider chased him around Ravinworld and he managed to squeeze himself in a bottle to escape from the spider to Scar, but the vex didn't speak Slime. Only Mumbo, Sapnap, and Exdee did. "Let's get you out of there so you could tell me in a game of charades, ok?" Scar said, making Slimenap giggle in their own way. It sounded like gurgles to Scar, but they were slimey giggles! Don't judge him, ok?

Let's just say Scar is terrible at Charades and there is a reason why they never play this game for faction game night.

Chapter Text

The server was buzzing with mischief. Sapnap had taken George's goggles and switched it with Scar's hat, which he placed Pearl's nametags where Scar's hat used to be. Grian was off trying to find a good place to grind out sand and creepers. Scar had followed him, yapping about a llama named Pizza. Impulse was making a blueprint of something that looked close to an automated farm... And Pearl was chasing after hostile mobs to flip upside down. Thank Jesus the minors decided to go looking for flowers and cows for a farm. Sapnap had left to nether (after George almost strangled him for taking his goggles) to get... Was it potion materials? No... Oh! To get Wither skulls! George has left to go get some seeds to make a huge wheat field in their ravine, and that left Dream with nothing to do...

Well, he could make Gapple pie... But that would need 4 golden apples, about a few cups of ground wheat, and sugar... He can rely on George for the wheat, and Impulse on the sugarcane. Golden apples? Oh boy. He got up and put on some of the iron armor Sapnap had made him and the iron axe he was given by George. Dream had expressed he wouldn't touch netherite in fear of Nightmare going apeshit. So off he went, looking for apples. After he got the amount he wanted (20 or so if you'd like to know), he went back to the faction, humming an old tune Puffy used to hum before she abandoned him. 

He doesn't blame her! Her heart was at sea and Dream's was on land in trees. Back to the present, Dream dropped the apples into a barrel in his small hidey-hole. He hadn't really made it much of a home. Just the essentials were in his part of Ravineworld. Patches squeaked at Dream, smiling in her own axolotl-y way. "Hi, Patchie. I've gotta go down into the mines for a bit. Can you make sure Slimenap doesn't do something silly again?" Dream said, laughing when Patches splashed some water at him. 

"Ugh, you know this domestically is just boring!" Nightmare groaned. Dream got up and took his pickaxe with him to the mines. "Now now, Nightmare... Grian and Xelqua told you to experience life in my eyes for the time being." Dream said. Nightmare grumbled a bit while a few pebbles began to float beside Dream. "Just watch out for mobs yeah? That way you can use you're love for chaos and destruction on them, and I can get enough gold for what I need." Dream said. "Boring... But fine. I can't risk you dying and them finding me. watchers are dicks." Nightmare said. Dream hums as he mines the gold ore, cringing at the new round texture they have. 

"I miss just getting the block..." Dream said, going deeper. Three hours and Dream returned to Ravineworld with almost three stacks of gold ore. He put them in his furnaces and waited. Patches squeaked and flopped out of her tank, scrambling towards Dream with a happy squeal. "Hey baby! I missed you!" Dream said, smiling as Patches gave him her own axolotl kiss. Which was a little fin on his nose. 

Slimenap hopped into the room and b-lined to Dream, faceplanting right as he got to Dream's leg. A little squeak from him made Dream think of Sapnap. "You really are Sapnap's slime, arent you?" Dream asked, setting Patches down to pat Slimenap's head before grabbing the still hot gold out of the furnace and grabbing four apples. He covered the apples in gold and began to grab some of George's already grown wheat. Don't worry, he replanted what he took! He ground up the wheat and borrowed some sugarcane from Impulse, grinding that up too. 

After that, he cut up the golden apples, and forged a small pan for the pie. After he finished the pan, he made sure all the dangerous things from the iron were gone before beginning to form the crust and filling. He hummed another old tune Foolish used to hum when he was given babysitting duty. He cut a circle the size of the pan out from his sheet of dough and placed it in the pan. After that, he filled a bowl full of the golden apple slices, the sugar and a few drops of water. He mixed the ingredients up well and placed them inside the pan with the layer of crust. Then, with the leftover crust, he began to cut out thin stripes and criss-crossed them in a lattice pattern. 

Then he placed the pan in the furnace and waited for it to cook. Usually it took about 4 hours to cook, but with Patches and Slimenap here, time seemed to fly past Dream. He knew it was done from the sweet smell of apples. He would've added cinnamon, but he couldn't find any and wasn't going to be bothered to go out and trade for a small portion. 

He took the pie out carefully, (He used his hoodie on his hands to act as oven mitts), and set it down in the small window he made. "I smell Gapple pie!" Sapnap said, skidding into Dream's place. "Gap-pie?!" George said, running in next to Sapnap. "Hold it you two. I've gotta let this one cool down first." Dream said. "You're gonna make more!?" Sapnap asked, his blue eyes sparkled in the way that was the equivalent to puppy eyes. "Yes. But, I'll need more apples and sugar and wheat." Dream said. "I've got bones, which'll make the crops easy to get!" George yelled, hopping down the three story drop that Dream's humble home was situated in. "I'll get that Gold for you." Sapnap said, doing the same as George, but running immediately after his feet hit the ground. 

"Lucky fire demon..." Dream hummed, going back to go fan his pie. 

~~~

"What in the flying fuck is this, Dream?" Tommy asked, poking his slice of pie. Well, every minor did the same. Purpled was a different story. He had a plate full of granite and diorite with a little bit of coal nuggets sprinkled about. "I hate to agree with Tommy here, but seriously... What is it?" Mumbo asked. "It smells good!" Grian hummed. The watcher was hungry, ok? Scar took a bite out of his slice already, forgetting about the whole wait rule. Pearl had done the same while Impluse dissected his. "It's Golden Apple Pie." Dream said, making everyone look at him.

"You can cook those?" Scar asked after he swallowed what was in his mouth. "Yep. It was a family recipe I've had stuck in my head." Dream said, looking over to George and Sapnap, who were praying and thanking Dream for the pie. "Dig in, ok? I promise, it's not poisoned." Dream said, eating his own slice. He noticed Exdee wasn't here and elbowed George slightly.

"Where's Exdee?" Dream asked. "He had to go back... Something about a duck getting his wings clipped and a shark getting his power back?" George said. "Oh, goodie... More hell that'll migrate our way..." Dream said, squeaking when Sapnap tried to steal his slice. "No! Bad Pandas!" Dream said, bopping Sapnap's head lightly.

"PANDAS!?" The crew yelled.

"It was my old name... Only Dream's allowed to use it, got it!" Sapnap huffed, shoving the last bit of pie on his plate in his mouth. "You know, Dream... We haven't had a bakery in a while on Hermitcraft." Impulse said. "That's right! Maybe you could make a shop in the shopping district that's like a bakery?" Pearl hummed. "I-I couldn't... I wouldn't know how to build the place, or how it would run, or what I'd need! I don't even know how to market it..." Dream said.

"Luckily, you live with some amazing builders and redstone geniuses. We'll help you, ok Dream?" Pearl said. "And, you have us too." Sapnap said, gesturing to the minors, George and him. "Ok... I'll think about it."

~~~

They ended up making a small bakery in the shopping district, officially marking the areas around that lone bakery as the shopping district.

Chapter Text

Techno was out and about, killing mobs and taming wolves and making the dogs... Usual Techno things that he does. Phil had told him to let loose and have fun, but all Techno could do was what he normally did on the SMP, sans farming potatoes. He had wandered around the server, greeting whoever he ran into. Most of the hermits he was close to. False, Joe, Cleo, Stress, Jevin, Iskall, Ren and Doc. Ok, that wasn't many, but it was better than the SMP with a whopping 4 people.

He was a bit curious of a few hermits of course. Grian and Xisuma were on the top of the list. Then came Scar, then Mumbo. How did Mumbo on the list? Only Techno knew. He went over to what looked like the makings of other buildings next to Dream's (Ravineworld's if you squint) bakery. Xisuma and Grian were there, thankfully! That meant he didn't have to manually hunt them down individually. 

Grian noticed him first, greeting him in the usual Grian fashion... Which was skydiving towards the person (If he was in the air) or full-on sprinting at them while chanting their name. This time Grian jumped from the roof of his little expansion of the bakery. "Technoblade! Hello there! Welcome to the new shopping district! How is your day today?" Grian rambled (I almost auto-typed George instead of Grian! XD), waving at Xisuma. The majority admin of the server had just finished setting their shulker boxes full of material to start their concrete shop. 

They waved back, walking over to greet Techno as well. "Hello, Technoblade. I hope you're enjoying your time here." X said, removing their helmet to smile at Techno. "You guys can call me Techno, ya know. I don't mind. And my time here has been great. Just thinking about some stuff." Techno said.

"Oh? About what?" X asked. "What I'm gonna do here." Techno said. "Oh! You should make a shop or something! I can see it now! Techno's Spartan training!" Grian said. "Name could use a little work, G." Xisuma said. "Maybe I could make a game out of it?" Techno said. "A minigame?" X asked, looking at Techno. The other nodded and Grian piped up.

"I remember when I made TNT run... I can't believe Hipixel actually took that and supersized it!" Grian said. "What?" Techno said. "Yeah! I made TNT run and I guess it hit it off and now everyone plays it!" Grian said. "I remember how that felt when Bedwars began to pick up some popularity." Xisuma hummed. "Heh?" Techno gulped. 

Hold up... Did those two just admit to creating the very games that Techno's career was built on? "You two made those!?" Techno yelled. His voice cut out at the end, not used to the scream he had pulled off. "Hm? Yeah! You should've seen the first arena I used for TNT run!" Grian said. "And the first island I made for Bedwars." Xisuma said. "Can you two show me? Or at least show me the plans you two made!?" Techno yelped. 

He was having a fanboy moment here. You'd do the same if you went to school and were told your teacher was the person who developed and designed your favorite video game. I mean, I would.

"I think I still have some stored away in a universal enderchest... I'll have to go back through the end to find a chest like it." Grian said. "Aren't those getting a crafting recipe soon?" Xisuma asked. "Only admins would know it... Most of us just scour the end and take them." Grian said. Techno stared in shock as his two new heroes yapped about their games that he grew up on and thrived off of. 

'Did I just meet my childhood heroes?' Techno thought.

~~~

Tommy built up another layer of cobblestone on the ground above Ravineworld. He was just having his fun, building those towers. He had developed a habit of tuning out the world around him while he constructed them. He didn't even notice Scar faceplant onto the layer he had made! "Tomsters?" Scar sang, waving his hands around, catching Tommy's attention. 

"Huh? You say something?" Tommy asked, placing another layer. "I said it looks good." Scar said. Tommy scoffed and continued his building. He didn't need the false compliment. Or at least, he assumed it was false. Scar meant what he said. He liked to believe that anyone's build is beautiful. No matter what. If it was Mumbo's redstone monster, he saw the beauty in the organized chaos. If it was Tango's Decked Out minigame, he saw its beauty. (It was already beautiful, but Scar just had to put that in there.)

Scar watched as Tommy worked, humming when the teen growled and groaned when he ran out of cobble. "You good there?" Scar asked. "Give me your honest opinion. Does this look horrible?" Tommy asked. Scar smiled and motioned for the teen to follow him down to the grass. He did so and stood next to Scar, staring at the cobblestone pillar. 

"I think, that your build is beautiful. You could break it up a little to make it pop more, but it's beautiful." Scar said. "what?" Tommy whispered, staring at Scar, dumbfounded. How could someone like Scar find his tower beautiful!? "Why are you lying?" Tommy growled. "I'm not. Now, it may not be in my personal style or taste, it's your build. You put in the work to place every single block, you put in the effort to make this, you are the creator of this masterpiece. This is your masterpiece. Not mine, not Tubbo's, yours." Scar said. Tommy sobbed at Scar's words, making the vex freak out and think he broke the kid. He kind of did? Tommy isn't a crier and it takes a lot to make him cry. 

"H-How would you make it better?" Tommy sobbed, burying his face in Scar's coat. "Let's wait for you to calm down." Scar said, petting Tommy's head. The teen calmed down and wiped his eyes. "You ready?" Scar asked, smiling when Tommy nodded. Scar handed the boy two stacks of mossy cobblestone, a stack of dark oak buttons, three stacks of candles, a flint and steel, half a stack of iron bars, and five stacks of vines. "Add a little bit of texture. If you'd like, I could help terraform the bottom to make it seem like it belongs in Ravinworld." Scar said.

"Yes!" Tommy yelled, jumping when Scar smiled and hugged the boy. "You're my dad now..." Tommy said. "Oh god, Grian's gonna kill me..." Scar said. He's got another son to deal with now!

~~~

Sapnap was practically vibrating while Tango gathered the materials he needed. "You good there, impling?" Tango asked, turning to look at Sap. "'M great! Excited!" The younger babbled. "So how do you make this?" Sapnap asked. "Take these and place them in this order on the crafting table." Tango said, pointing to the diagram above them. Sapnap nodded and did so, watching as the crafting table did its thing. Merging the glass, ghast tear and the eye of ender together to make the unstable explosive known as end crystals. "What're these for again?" Sapnap asked.

"To revive the dragon and blow up other players." Tango said. "I'll be right back then!" Sapnap yelled, using the elytra he had bought from Jevin like Grian had in season 6 to go find George.

Georgenotfound blew up

Sapnap blew up

<Georgenotfound: Really?>

<Sapnap: So worth it>

<MumboJumbo: That's it, you two are grounded.>

<Tubbo_: Does that coancel out mine!?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: No, Tubs>

<GoodtimeswithScar: You're still in trouble for the chicken incident>

<Stressmonster101: Chicken incident?>

<PearlescentMoon: Tubbo brutally tortured a chicken because it ate his beetroot seeds>

<Rendog: It deserved it in my opinion>

Chapter Text

Ravineworld was busy. The redstone nerds were busy getting stacks and stacks of redstone, Scar was off getting wood with Tubbo, Grian was running around the caves to get moss and glowberries, Pearl was off mob wrangling, and that left Sapnap, Dream, George, Tommy, Ranboo and Purpled confused. It didn't help that Techno and Phil had come by to visit and noticed how all 6of them were standing confused. 

"Oh! You guys are just in time!" Impulse cheered, shouting down to Mumbo about having extra pockets to help. "Mumbo and I need some help transferring these shulker boxes to the minigame district! A whole bunch of hermits are making minigames, and well, there's some redstone involved for most of them." Impulse explained, waving them over. They did so and waited for Impulse to hand them their shulker boxes. "Where is this place again?" Dream asked. "Um... I'm not sure... But I can ask Wels and Gem for the coordinates there!" Impulse said before he whipped out his communicator and began typing.

<ImpulseSV: What are to coords to the minigame district again?>

<Geminitay: -207, 76, 2057>

<Grian: I see you guys>

<MumboJumbo: Don'tdive at them!>

Grian experienced kinetic energy

<Welsknight: I've got his things>

<MumboJumbo: Thank you>

The boys smiled when a happy Grian waddled out of his house and flew to the place he plummeted. "You guys should follow him." Impulse called. The others scrambled to catch up to Grian. Phil had no problem due to his wings, but everyone else? They still struggled to use their elytra in a non-competitive way. Ace race did some things to them that made them want to race everywhere...

They had made it to the minigame district, laughing. George and Sapnap may have tripped each other so many times they had practically tumbled there. Which didn't help that Tommy called them wet ducks with two loose feet. That had the whole group laughing. Gem and Wels waved at them with smiles of their own. 

"You made it! We were beginning to think you guys got lost!" Gem giggled, petting Goose's head while she helped the others place the shulker boxes and sort them. "Ooh! You Ravine boys really know your stuff!" Wels said, pulling out the multitude of stacks of redstone. "Aw! They even got mob heads!" Gem said, placing an enderdragon's on her head. "Gah!" Wels yelped, hopping away while holding his chest. "What're you doing with that? Don't you need it for your minigame?" Wels asked. "I do!" Gem yelled from the large mob's head. The thing made everything muffled for her. It didn't help that she sounded like a helpless Pikachu who managed to get their head stuck in a bucket.

Dream ran back to to Impulse and Mumbo to get more materials for Gem and Wels. "Oh! You're back! Great! We were just about to head to the minigame district too! Scar and Pearl are on their way too." Mumbo said, holding a white shulker box. Dream waved and walked over to help Impulse. "So, what do minigames do anyway?" Dream asked. "They're just a way for other hermits to have fun and get their minds off of their current projects. Why?" Impulse said.

"Well... I'm not sure if any of my friends and former servermates will know what to do..." Dream said. "You guys don't have to make yours now. Take some time and brainstorm. It's best to have an idea before jumping in." Mumbo said. "He's got a point... If you ever need help, don't be afraid to call for help. We hermits will always come to your aid." Impulse said.

"You sound like his mother..." Scar teased, wheeling down to them. He may have forgotten to charge his leg braces. Dream looked down while he remembered Puffy. How she practically abandoned him for Foolish. "... Dream? Earth to the blond tall person." Scar cooed, waving his hands in front of Dream's face. "Huh?" Dream said. "You're crying... Oh, come here!" Scar said, pulling Dream down to hug him. The enderdragon hybrid yelped as his face was pressed to a wheelchair bound vex's chest while he cried. 

Good thing? His face wasn't burning from tears... Bad thing? Scar had a tendency to hug a person to the point to where they faint...

<MumboJumbo: Uh oh>

<ImpulseSV: Mayday>

<Grian: WHat happened?>

<ImpluseSV: Scar won't let go of Dream>

<Tubbo_: Dad No!>

Sapnap fell from a high place 

<Georgenotfound: Why?>

<Sapnap: I got Dream!>

<MumboJumbo: He's holding him like the monkey did in the lion king>

<Geminitay: Rafiki?>

<PearlescentMoon: How did you know that?>

<Geminitay: Empires SMP>

<PearlescentMoon: Understandable>

Chapter Text

"Pulsey! We have to leave for out of server issues with our non-hermit buddies! Can you do us a favor and make sure our builds and homes don't explode when we come back?" Pearl said. "Uh, sure?" Impulse said, wondering what was going on. He knew of Scar's health problem and that he has to go to surgery soon, but everyone else? He was clueless. Grian mentioned something about another server close to Last life needing help with the setup, Mumbo said he had to do some testing on some redstone monster in another server of his, Pearl had to help resolve something on another server with Gem, and that left poor Impulse with the four minors and three adults who are basically minors in bigger bodies.

"Just remember, Tubbo needs at least 12 hours of sunlight to hang out with his bee, Tommy will constantly nag at you for attention, Purpled will try to eat your walls, and Ranboo will try to help you wrangle them." Scar said. "Oh! And Dream is terrified of Thunderstorms, but don't worry. As long as one person is asleep, it'll go away. Sapnap hates spiders, so make sure they can't get in... Oh! And make sure George doesn't grow mushrooms off his body! The last time that happened, Tommy ate a mushroom off from him, and ten minutes later... He was passed out on a tree..." Grian said. 

"S-Should I be writing this down?" Impulse asked. "Nope! They'll know what to do. Enderdragon on your 6." Scar said just as Dream jumped on his back. "Pulsey!!!" Dream yelled, hugging Impulse. "Hi Dream! You guys go ahead! Be careful, ok?" Impulse said. "Where are they going?" Tubbo asked, tunneling out from the floor ahead of Impulse. Sapnap, Tommy, and Purpled poked their heads out from the massive hole in the ground and looked at Impulse. 

"They have out of server things to do." Impulse said. "Aw..." Purpled said. "Scar didn't even get to finish my hat..." The alien huffed. "He's working on it, Purp... He's got some internal difficulties that need to be sorted out." Impulse said. He remembered from Boatem when Purpled asked him why Scar had mechanical things on his legs and why he'd see the hermit in a wheelchair or being carried around on someone's back. When he had told him that Scar's body rejects his vex side, well... The alien reminded him of dial up. He was sure he heard the smaller alien make a sound similar to it.

"So! What's the plan for today, Mr. Pulse?" Sapnap asked, wiggling out from the tunnel and helping the others out. "Well... I was going to the minigame district to begin making our minigame... But by the looks of it, it seems that a storm is coming..." Impulse said. "WHAT!? W-wait! We're in a ravine! R-Rain's gonna get stuck here, a-and then Ranboo's gonna burn to death!" Tommy tapped. "How did you go from despising him to worrying about them?" Purpled asked. "I've been worried about that tall weirdo!" Tommy huffed. 

"And this is why Tommy is our mascot. He's Ravineworld personified." Ranboo said from a boat. "Why are you in a boat?" Dream asked, getting off from Impulse's back. "I met this cool Enderman named Kyle! He and I are going to boat around for a while." Ranboo said. "Well, make sure you keep him under some cover, ok? Looks like it's about to rain." Impulse said. 

A crack of Thunder sounded and Dream yelped, tackling Impulse. "I do not like you Thunder!" The blond yelled. Impulse managed to get everyone to the biggest shelter in Ravineworld, which was surprisingly George's place before it started getting darker. "You guys stay here, ok? I'm going to make a draining system for the bottom floor in case of a flood, ok?" Impulse said. "Let me join!" Sapnap said. "Sapnap. There may be spiders or something else down there. I don't want to risk you having a panic atta- Purpled, stop trying to take a bite out of George's walls." Impulse said, catching Purled with his mouth only inches away from George's mushroom walls. "But he makes mushrooms! He can make more!" Purpled huffed. 

"We used to have a cave spider XP grinder in our old server, I can handle them." Sapnap said. "Sappy... You do realize cave spiders are half the size of regular spiders here? Right?" George said. "What?" Sapnap gapes, looking at George. Dream smacked George on the back of his head and frowned. "Way to go, dummy. Now he's second-guessing himself." The other said. "George, just make sure that everyone stays here. I'll be back before you miss me. Ok?" Impulse said. 

"Why do I feel like Impulse is our single mother and we're his children. And he's going to leave us for a little bit because he needs to trade for us to make some type of living?" Ranboo asked. "Because he basically is." Purpled said. Tommy just looked at Impulse with those big blue eyes that reminded him of Grian whenever the birb wanted to play a prank. "I'll be back soon. Just making a small funnel for the water to go. Maybe I could make a large well for something..." Impulse said, skipping away to get the thing he set off to do done before Tommy decided to trust fall into Impulse's back due to separation anxiety.

That boy is like a magnet to bright colors... 

~~~

Impulse returned after he made multiple chutes to help drain the water when the rain started. Boy was he glad that Scar made tunnels for everyone's pets to roam around. Dream was holding Patches, Sapnap had Slimenap, or kotópoulo, and George held Dream and Sapnap... Wait... Don't tell them that he sees them as pets!? 

A crash of thunder sounded again, making Dream scream and Sapnap yelp. Impulse smiled when he saw George pull them closer to him and moved to the others. They had basically cuddled up into a big crowd to ride out the storm. "You ok?" Impulse asked. "I hate thunderstorms... I-Is the single-player sleep working yet?" Dream asked. "Lemme check ok?" Impulse said. 

<ImpulseSV: Single sleep working?>

<Cubfan135: Not yet>

<Cubfan135: Still working on getting another bed.>

<ImpulseSV: I'll see if it works, k>

"So far, we have to see... I'll use George's bed here and tell me if it clears up." Impulse said, laying in George's bed and 'sleeping'. It was practically just him closing his eyes and waiting. So kind of like sleeping, except losing consciousness. The rain did not let up. "Not working..." Purpled said. "What if we all pile up and just sleep?" Tommy offered. 

Impulse sat up and smiled. "That's a good idea. You guys settle in and I'll barricade the door to make sure the mobs and water stay outside." Impulse said, getting out some smooth stone blocks and placing them down to cover George's circle of a door. Well... This is an interesting sight!

The boys are all bundled up and cuddled up together, snoring softly. If you asked Impulse, he thought it was cute. He took a picture on his communicator and sent it to everyone who was awake.

<ImpulseSV: Look at these cuties>

<ImpulseSV: [Picture of the sleeping forms of Tommy, Purpled, Tubbo, and Ranboo hugging Dream, Sapnap, and George with the mobs in the middle smiling in their own way]>

<Tango: Impy!>

<Tango: Now I want to fly over there and join you guys!>

<Cubfan135: I second that>

<BdoubleO100: Aw!>

<BdoubleO100: Now I want a young person of my own!>

<Tango: You have Twee-twee!>

<BdoubleO100: But Twee-twee is a goat>

<Cubfan135: How did you get a goat in a warm ocean biome?>

<BdoubleO100: Persistence>

<Tango: Big eyes>

"Oh! The storm stopped. You guys can... Oh you all fell asleep." Impulse said, looking at the pile of sleeping players and mobs.

What? Hermitcraft makes the cruelest of the cruel soften up and become mushy piles of cuteness! 

Chapter Text

Tommy scoured the server looking for Sam Nook. He tried Ravineworld, the shopping district, the minigame district, he even broke into everyone's base to find the slippery tanuki bear. When he found him, the bear was on top of the bakery, working on a name for it. The tanuki was scribbling down suggestions to run by Dream when Tommy scrambled to pick the small thing up. 

"SAM NOOK!!!!!" Tommy screamed, squishing the bear as he hugged the tanuki. Sam Nook made more animal crossing sounds scolding Tommy about squishing him. Tommy, being the expert in Animal Crossing, understood everything while the hermit below them, most likely Etho, looked at them like he looked at Scar when the vex set fire to his wool castle in 3rd life. 

Etho never agreed to not mentioning 3rd life. He just blinked and nodded when Grian would look his way. "Sam Nook! I need to ask you of a favor! You remember the guys I live with?" Tommy started, watching Sam Nook's nose twitch a little. "Well, anyway! I was wondering if you could make a build of some sort for them... You don't have to of course! Y-You could always tell me what to do!" Tommy yelled. The teen never did have a middle ground of quiet and loud. It was always loud, louder, and ear bleeding shrieks. Never whispering unless someone put their hand over Tommy's mouth and could deal with his habit of licking their hand. 

Like Mumbo or Impulse! Those two always had redstone dust on their hands, and Tommy learned the hard way that redstone is like spicy siracha sauce on steroids. His mouth burned and stung for days after he licked Mumbo's hand during one of the server-wide meetings X holds to check in with the server members. Why did Mumbo cover his mouth? Tommy was yapping about blowing up Tango's newest edition of Decked Out which he cleverly named "Decked Out: Survive the Drowned" Tommy attempted one round and was sadly skewered by a trident off the bat. Thankfully he followed the directions Tango put in place!

Sam Nook nodded and made a sound close to what the villagers make when the player in animal crossing gives them a gift. 

Sam Nook whispers to you: I can do that Tommy.

Sam Nook whispers to you: All I need is Blackstone, Stripped birch logs, Yellow concrete powder, and whatever other blocks you think fit the people you have in mind. I'll figure something out. Meet me at Boatem 2.0 when you'rre ready.

This is why Tommy saw Sam Nook as a competent father figure. The tanuki may have been cute and squishy looking, but he'd stab a bitch if they even thought of hurting a hair on Tommy's head. True story. "You got it, Sam Nook!" Tommy said, putting the small bear down and jumping off the roof. Sam Nook blinked a little before he slowly climbed down.

Thank god Etho stayed around. The hermit had to help Sam Nook down from the ledge he had gotten stuck on. All Etho saw was a little round tanuki butt and small little stubby legs dangling from a plant box Pearl and Gem installed to give the bakery a bit more color. When Sam Nook thanked Etho, the hermit didn't understand until the tanuki wrote it down for him. After that, Sam Nook waved goodbye to Ethi and waddled away, leaving Etho to wonder how something so cute is capable of being Tommy's comfort being.

While Tommy scoured the server for the blocks he needed, Sam Nook had to find a spot by Ravineworld to put this thing up. The tanuki had a place in mind, but had no idea what to make. Should he make a statue? A building? A lighthouse where ships won't be able to see it due to being inland? Oh! He knows!! A comfort space! The tanuki bear nodded and placed a hard hat on his head before he waddled down the steps into Ravineworld to get a feel of what kind of building style he'd need to imitate...

There was no set style. One part was detailed, another was very plain, another part had holes in the walls that acted as shelves for random things, one part looked more majestic while the opposite side looked like it went through hell and back, another part had redstone blocks scattered about the walls and walkways with redstone contraptions underneath, and finally, the last bit he got to was an aquarium-like part where axolotls, tropical fish, cod and salmon swam about. Sam Nook saw an axolotl with a name tag on their tail and read the name tag. "Patches?" Sam Nook said, tilting his head. The axolotl turned and bapped their head on the glass wall at the mention of their name. Sam Nook waved at Patches and waddle away, taking more notes about the place. 

Tommy got back and gave Sam Nook all the materials, the tanuki waved the boy off with one of his paws and set to work. 

~~~

"Where did this come from!? Scar did you do this!?" Grian yelled at the brink of dawn. "Me!? I thought you did it!" Scar said. "You sure it wasn't Impulse? Last season he did something like this." Mumbo suggested. "I was with you all day yesterday! How could I do this!? This is way beyond my league in building..." Impulse huffed. "What's the big deal? All I see is a new pop up building that connects to a whole bunch of sub levels that's coincidentally tailoredto each member of our region" Pearl said. "How is Pearl the calmest of us all?" Scar asked. "We live in a ravine, worldhop, our last world had the moon unalive itself... I'm also Austrilian." Pearl said. 

Tommy noticed Sam Nook's new building and smiled. Sam Nook always had a knack for erecting commissions overnight. When Tommy bumped into the small tankui the little builder nodded at Tommy and went back to what he was doing... Which was figuring out Tango made redstone look messy. Whenever the tanuki went to tell the other hw to clean it up a bit, all Tango could hear was his noises. Now, Tubbo or Tommy are Sam Nook's designated interpereters. In fact, the boys decided that it would be helpful to get the server developed even better with Sam Nook's extra hands in building. So they made a small expansion of the bakery with a small room made for Sam Nook. 

Some of the hermits took advantage of the new pair of hands to help build parts of their bases or bits and bobs around the server. Most of the commissions were little pranks within Ravineworld. Sam Nook noticed how each would respond to each little prank. Grian would sigh and relocate the structure somewhere in his base, Scar would die to it no matter what, Impulse would repurpose it into something else, Mumbo would forget about it, and Pearl would tear it down and use the materials to make her area pop more. 

Anyone from the DreamSMP would smirk and pat Sam Nook on the head whenever they passed him, except Tommy and Tubbo... Those two would pick him up and squeeze him like he was a teddy bear. Poor Sam Nook... Thankfully! Dream would pry the tanuki out from the other teens grip tolet the bear breathe. What can Tubbo and Tommy say!?

He's a round tanuki bear with a creeper face crudely drawn on a piece of paper taped to his head! He's cute! He even likes to eat apples from Stress' orchard.

Chapter Text

Dream flew around the server to look for X. He may have been the main Admin of the server, but Xisuma had seniority. When the blond found the older admin, he may have flown face first into the side of X's build. Which was a lighthouse. Why is that person building a lighthouse in the middle of a lake? No boats are gonna come their way!

Dream slides down the wall like one of those cartoon characters that managed to get thrown into a wall and spalt into a vertical puddle. Xisuma saw this and waited for the enderdragon to slide back down to the ground before they asked if Dream was ok. "You alright there?" X asked. Dream nodded and hopped up to stand and talk to X. 

"I wanted to run something by you." Dream said, fidgeting with his giant wings. "Oh? What is it?" the elder admin asked, setting down their shulker box and placing another for Dream to sit on. "U-Um... I was wondering if I could go through the logs of my ex-server and see if I can pull a member out from that specific date and implement them here... It's ok to say no too!" Dream said. "Well, Most times I would say no to this, but you seem adamant that this member is in need of relocation at that time... I would say go ahead under one condition..." Xisuma said, holding one finger up. "They are to be peaceful and respectful to everyone on this server." They said. 

"Yes Senior Admin!"Dream said, saluting Xisuma with a happy smile. "Don't worry, X. Their name is Ghostbur and Tommy really misses him... Nightmare may be responsible to why Tommy misses him." Dream said, growling his watcher's/dreamon's name. The memory of a promise he made to Tommy and all the younger boys of his SMP.

"I promise I will return all the happiness that... That thing took from you. Even if that means I die trying to make up for all those things." 

To say X felt for the younger was an understatement. The other never really did understand what watchers do to people, but from the stories Grian, Pearl and now Nightmare tell them, They'd like to give those beings a piece of their mind. 

Dream opened up his communicator and linked up to the SMP, going through the code and copying Wilbur's old code. Yes, reviving the man fucked his code up so bad that Dream regrets that impulsive decision to fuck Tommy's life up like how the teen did to him. Dream quickly pasted Wilbur's old code inside the server and sighed when a familiar ghost appeared.

Ghostbur has joined the game

<Tommyinnit: What>

<Grian: X, who's this?>

<Xisumavoid: Someone Dream wanted to bring in.>

<Ghostbur: Hello!>

<Dream: As a sorry, Tommy.>

<Dream: I know what happened there was a terrible thing, and I'm sorry I did that. You don't need to forgive me, but please accept this act as kindness and as an apology.>

<Tommyinnit: Dream, it's cool. What's done is done.>

<Tubbo_: You didn't bring Micheal here!?>

<Dream: I can only yank one person or mob at a time, Tubbo!>

<Tubbo_: #GiveMichealtohisdads>

<ImpulseSV: Who's Micheal?>

<Ranboo: Me and Tubbo's son.>

<iJevin: *my>

<Iskall85: Jevin!>

Dream held his hand out for Ghostbur and waited for the ghostly version of Wilbur to take his hand. "Oh! Hello Dream! How did Tommy's exile turn to this?" Ghostbur asked. "uh... I had a change of heart. Now, let's get you back to Tommy." Dream said, walking Ghostbur away from X's base. "Dream, before you leave, can we speak?" X asked. Dream nodded and told Ghostbur to not move from the spot he was floating above.

The blond admin skipped over to Xisuma and hummed. "So... He's a ghost." X said. "I... Uh... Yeah... It was my fault. Things exilated so fast, I had no idea what was coming up... A-and Ghostbur was the outcome... I-I should've fought Nightmare harder, then that wouldn't have happened..." Dream said, looking up to the sky to stop himself from crying. X hugged Dream and the blond hugged back. He was crying again. 

"Sometimes, our mistakes produce better outcomes..." X said. "But You've never made a mistake like I have..." Dream said, pulling back from the hug. "Dream, I was young like you. I've made worse mistakes than you have. Trust me. You don't think I wear this helmet and change my appearance every season because I can, do you?" X asked. Dream shrugged and laughed dryly. "I just thought you wanted to be easier to identify." Dream chuckled, freeing one of his hands to wipe his tears. He was burning himself, yes... But sometimes, even Enderfolk need to cry.

"Here. So you heal from your tear burns..." X said, handing Dream a regeneration potion and a golden apple. "Oh my goodness! I just noticed you have wings and horns Dream! You didn't have those a few minutes ago..." Ghostbur said, making Dream turn around and smile fondly at Ghostbur. "Well, that's because I'm an Enderdragon Hybrid. I didn't show it much since I was afraid." Dream said, lying a bit. Ghostbur's mouth twitched a little and then he had a lightbulb over his head. Wait... What? 

"Have some Blue!" Ghostbur said, pulling out a glob of clear gelatin (?) from his chest wound and handing it to Dream, who held it gratefully. X on the other hand gasped and almost fainted at the sight. The perks of living with a ghost. This was a normal ocurance that anyone on the SMP is used to. "Thank you, Ghostbur." Dream said. "H-How is it not staining your hands?" X asked. "Well, Ghostbur has this ability to create an item that saps your sadness and makes this clear blob slowly turn blue. Once it's all the way blue, like your sheep's wool over there, you're supposed to throw this in lava or fire to burn up your sorrows." Dream said, with Ghostbur nodding. 

"Would you like some, Helmet wearing person?" Ghostur asked, making X shake his head faster than Scar can die. "No no! I'm ok! No sadness here." X said, with a forced smile. "Oh.. OK! Dream, where's Tommy?" Ghostbur asked. "I'm going to take you to him, silly. Now, hold on tight ok?" Dream said, pocketing the glob and taking Ghostbur's hand. Ghostbur waved goodbye to Xisuma with Dream while they flew to Ravineworld. 

"Oh! This looks different!" Ghostbur said. "It is. Ah! There's Tommy!" Dream said. The two flew down and landed in front of Tommy. "Tommy!!" Ghostbur beamed, floating over to hug Tommy. "Wha? Dream, what's this?" Tommy asked. "I did as I promised. I brought back the happiness Nightmare stole from you." Dream said. "You didn't have to. You already did bring me my happiness. You got my dad and brother to look at me like I was family again, and not as an enemy." Tommy said. "Still... I know I did some shitty things too..." Dream said. "It was a heat of the moment kind of thing." Tommy said. 

"No, not really. I was just angry and took it out on someone here." Dream said, nodding his head to Ghostbur who was busy squishing a sheep's nose. "It's fine. Seriously. But thank you." Tommy said, hugging the older. "Thank you for not hating my guts." Dream said. Tommy waved at Ghostbur and ran towards the ghost.

Dream smiled and looked at Wilbur's current code. What the hell was Self_destruct_709.exe supposed to do? At least Ghostbur didn't have that...

~~~

Back on the SMP, Quackity was not accepting the fact that Dream is free. "I need that book." He growled to Fundy. "What for?" Fundy asked. "That's personal. All you have to do is find a way into his enderchest. Got it?" he said. "Yes, sir..." Fundy said, bowing his head. 

Chapter Text

Exdee groaned as he watched the players not notice their server practically having a meltdown with the knowledge of its admin is not on the server and isn't on its list of players. How do these people live? At least the mobs that adopted players have noticed! Shroud was the first to pick up on something being off.

Tommy hadn't returned from that visit he told Shroud about and the spider noticed that the boys Tommy was usually around hadn't stopped by either. Not that it was an odd thing... Tommy tended to growl at them or shut them out whenever he didn't want them around. Shroud misses his human. Which is probably why he started seeking the other mobs who had players taking care of them.

Which may have meant Shroud poisoned Sam slightly to get to Micheal. What? Shroud knows a lot about poison due to hanging out in the spider spawner that was made way before Shroud was hatched from his mother... Who he hasn't seen ever. Like never ever. If you asked him who was his mom, he'd point at Tommy's picture and blink his 8 eyes at you.

Exdee saw the small spider bouncing around the SMP and smiled at how determined he was. The gd made sure to keep an eye out on them. After Shroud got Micheal, Michelle, Yogurt, and Karl (Yogurt practically ran into the time traveller's leg and said carry me), the spider and baby zombie piglin were on the hunt for a certain altar. An altar that resided with the totem family. Yep... Foolish, Foolish Jr., and Finnley... Micheal and Shroud were on good terms with Finnely and Foolish Jr. so that was a plus! Karl was kind of hiding from Foolish... So that's was a set back... Nothing the babies of the SMP couldn't handle! Unless Foolish just tries to strike them.

"Shroud! Mikey!!! Hello again!" Finnely chirps, sliding next to the treking batch of kiddos and adult. "Hello, Finnely. Is your dad home?" Shroud asked. Finnely shook theirhead and smiled. "Finnely! I've been looking for you all over the place! What did dad tell us about leaving the temple?" Foolish Jr. huffed, making Finnely huffle his feet. "Sorry... I just couldn't sit in my altar all day like you and pop-pop can..." Finnely sniffled. Shroud pat his friend's back and made a familiar hiss that Finnely loved. "Thank you Shroud." The youngest totem said, hugging Shroud. 

"I hate to ruin this rare wholesome moment, but why are we here at the totems, Shroud?" Karl asked. "T-Tommy... Bee 'n boo... No here..." Micheal stuttered out. "Oh... Don't worry, I'm sure we'll find them." Karl said. "Mm-mm! Like no longer registered to this place! In somewhere different!" Yogurt squeaked, putting their small hands on Karl's swirls. Fundy may have taught the fox how to shapeshift. "Oh... Then that means we have to go off server, and I'm not sure if you guys can." Karl said. 

"We can asked Papa's God!" Finnely piped up, earning a quick smack to his head from Foolish Jr. "Finnely! No one is allowed to know that except us!" Foolish Jr. huffed. "Brother... The entire server worships them! Mr. Jacobs here has powers of his own that were given to him by them! What do you mean no one is supposed to know!?" The youngest totem snaps.Shroud and Michelle giggled at their antics.

The group managed to wander inside Foolish's temple, Finnely guiding the group while Foolish Jr. prayed that their father wouldn't flip out when he figures out the altar had been found by another player and used. They had made it to a small lectern with a few statues around it. Karl had to make sure the kids kept their hands on his pants or hoodie as to not upset Exdee, not like they would, since the god had a soft spot for the mobs that adopted players.

The traveler read over the book Foolish had on the lectern. "Karl? What're you doing here?" Foolish said, making Karl and the kids scream. "Papa! It's not what it looks like!" Foolish Jr. said, hopping in front of the group. "I know, son. You and Finnely did a good thing. DreamXD informed me of the server's predicament... Karl, I trust you'll bring the kids somewhere safe." Foolish said, squating down to brush his hands over his children's face. "Will you join us, papa?" Finnely asked. "I... I will do my best to catch up to you." Foolish said. 

Karl smiled at the touching scene before him. He knew he had to get the kids out of the SMP before it collapsed, but he couldn't abandon the pets of the SMP either. "Foolish... Can I put my trust in you?" Karl asked. "Wha? Yes, why?" Foolish asked. "I need you to promise on your life, that when I find the others, you will send the pets of the SMP there. Do not tell anyone else unless DreamXD tells you to." Karl said. "You know of them too?" Foolish said. "More or less." Karl said. Foolish nodded and pushed Finnley and Foolish Jr. into the altar's circle. 

"My altar is connected to DreamXD, who is connected to Dream... They'll take you to him." Foolish said, drawing up the ritual's symbols for a server transfer. "Hold on tight, ok everybody?" Karl said, making sure every child had a hold on him somehow. The next the the group knew, they were transported to a handmade island with names they don't recognize and Karl's communicator going crazy.

The brunette set Yogurt down and opened up his communicator.

<Sapnap: Karl>

<Sapnap: Someone please tell me you're seing the same thng>

<Dream: Sap, calm down.>

<Sapnap: My baby's here>

<Grian: Who's this?>

<Xisumavoid: Hello?>

<KarlJacobs: Hi... Uh... I need help.>

<Docm77: Stay at spawn, ok?>

<KarlJacobs: Bee! Boo! Is Micheal!>

<Tubbo_: MICHEAL!>

<Ranboo: Micheal!!!!>

<Technoblade: I vote for them to get them.>

Tubbo, Tommy, Ranboo, and Purpled (reluctantly) grabbed boats and raced to get to the spawn island. "Hurry up, Purpled! You're gonna slow us down!" Tubbo screamed, racing up the stairs that Pearl built. The alien in question flipped Tubbo off as he hauled an entire shulker box of andesite and boats with him.

They made it the spawn island where Karl and the children were huddled together. "Micheal!" Tubbo yelled, falling out of his boat once it reached land to hug his baby son. Micheal squealed and snorted in happiness. Tommy hugged Shroud while the spider hissed and nuzzled Tommy's face. "So... Is the SMP in chaos yet?" Purpled asked Karl who scoffed. "No one seems to notice how resources are getting harder and harder to come by. I think the SMP is falling apart from the inside out without Dream." Karl said. "And Mr. Ducky isn't gonna let Mr. Dream be at peace! He's trying to get my papa to hack into Mr. Dream's enderchest!" Yogurt huffed, their tail was puffed out in annoyance.

"Wait, Quackity's doing what?" Purpled said. "Did you know about this, Karl?" Purpled asked. "I barely talk to the..." Karl trailed off, motioning for the kids to cover their ears and close their eyes. Once everyone, besides Yogurt, had done so, Karl finished his sentence. "Bastard. Dumbass thinks he's god's gift to the server. Do you know Sapnap and I actually loved him once?" Karl grumbled. "You're ramblin'..." Purpled said.

"We... We should get you guys to the mainland." Tommy said. Karl tapped each child and made sure they knew to stay close. The trek to Ravinworld was by far easier than the journey to spawn. Maybe that's because the hermits (and Sapnap) have been chipping away at the nether and made a nether highway of sorts. Karl had to make sure the children had a link so they wouldn't get lost or wander off. You know that thing teachers did when they had the entire class hold hands and walk in a line in a crowded area, and that one kid managed to wiggle their way out of the line and into some line for food? Yeah, that. 

The group made it to Ravineworld and they group was immediately greeted by the faction. "Oh! You never told me you guys had children on your server!" Pearl cooed, hugging Yogurt tight while Michelle braided her hair. The faction was currently residing in their gifted community center which made it easier for the kids to be entertained. "Well, They start off as mobs that we get attached to, and well... After an incident, I decided to make it so the mobs have to spend enough time to become a child." Dream sheepishly said. "It was the only thing I got to do when Nightmare wasn't as strong..." Dream said.

"Watchers are a difficult thing to handle, Dream. Pearl and I know first hand." Grian said, patting Dream's back. "So, are Watchers like Dr. Strange or are they more of a Loki?" Sapnap asked. "More like Venom with a cup of Loki and a pinch of Ultron in there." Pearl said. "Holy Exdee, Dream you got that?" Sapnap said, pulling Finnely and Foolish Jr. away from Dream like he got a contagious cold. "It's not contagious, Sapnap. As long as you stay out of the Watchers' radar of potential additions, you're ok." Grian said.

"I'm not doing anymore manuhunts with you..." Sapnap gasped. Finnely giggled at Sapnap's overacting and smiled at his brother. "Remember when Papa said Mr. Sapnap would kill us if he found us?" FInnely said, making Foolish Jr. pale. "Different me, Kiddo..." Sapnap said, making the smaller god sigh. 

Sapnap didn't even notice Shroud sit next to him. The scream the group heard was priceless. You know that tiktok of a soundalike of Sapnap singing CPR and Bad screams language, making Sapnap scream? Yeah, that one. "Sapnap, It's just Shroud!" Tommy and Tubbo giggled. "Spiders scare me, man!" Sapnap sobbed, hiding behind George. "Sapnap, you've done how many manhunts against Dream with aggressive spiders after us, done countless what if videos with us, where Dream messed with the code to make life hell for us, and competed in MCC, where there is a gamemode with spiders involved, and you're scared of little old Shroud?" George taunted Sapnap.

The mushroom brit knew exactly how to make Sapnap face his fears. And one way was taunting him. Sapnap huffed and walked over to Shroud, picking the peaceful spider up and carrying the spider around as he walked about. To say Shroud was confused was an understatement. Poor Shroud. At least he made Sapnap a new set of fire resistant spider silk gloves! Sapnap may have burnt his last set when Karl and the kids were brought to the server. 

Over the next few days, the entire faction would give Sapnap "Spider therapy" which in Scar's words was 'A way for us to throw Sapnap, Tommy, and Shroud in a room together and for us to watch what happens.' His money is on Sapnap pulling an unaware cat that was thrown into a bath full of water. The first session had Sapnap crying on Dream's shoulder for four hours while Shroud guiltily wrapped up Sapnap's wrist that he bit. The second had Sapnap shaking while he was in a blanket burrito whiles Shroud was scolded about lunging at Sapnap once the lights went out due to Impulse and Mumbo updating the redstone. The third rendered Sapnap immobile due to the shock of watching Shrou climb up a wall and devour a silverfish that scuttled into one of his webs. The fourth was when Sapnap could actually function after a session! Major breakthrough!

Turns out, if Sapnap has a clicker, his brain choose flight instead freeze from the choices of: Fight, flight or freeze. The fifth had Shroud hugging Sapnap whenever the two passed, the sixth was cuddles, then the seventh was like a family reunion, except Sapnap is the barbecue uncle and Shroud is the food stealing nephew. Would that make Dream the wine aunt or the one everyone notices? What would that make George? Grian, Mumbo!? We all know Scar is the uncle who can't stay out of the hospital, and Impulse is the tech uncle who has more phones than car payments. 

Tommy misses Shroud and Shroud missed Tommy. Whenever the teen needed to leave for his errands, Shourd would make those sad hisses and furrow his brow(s) for more cuddles. Tubbo and Ranboo went back to their old schedule with Micheal, sans the locking up and kidnapping. Yogurt went on adventures with Dream, since the small fox saw Dream as their mother, despite not knowing that their player almost married the other's father. Michelle always stuck with Pearl, since she and Gem were perfect role models for her, sorry Puffy and Niki and Hannah... But those two Michelle knew wouldn't trade her for useless shit. Finnley, Foolish Jr. and Karl stuck with Sapnap, who was always wandering around looking for Bdubs or Tango or Keralis to bother. Sometimes he bite the bullet and bother Zedaph because Finnely would run up to Zedaph and tell the hermit how awesome he looked. 

Some might be wondering 'Are the fiances going to make up!?' and well... Let's say Dream made sure to make less Gapple pie three night ago when Karl decided to 'sleep' in the same room as Sapnap. He's pretty sure they did more that sleep... And that's saying something, since Sapnap was more of a huggable panda bear now than before.

Chapter Text

Dream's communicator pinged, making the blond shoot out of bed to check. 

Event today! SAPNAP'S BIRTHDAY

"Oh yeah, Sapnap turning 21 today..." Dream said, going to the chat option and clicking the whisper feature and rigging it to reach everyone except Sapnap.

You whisper to Everyone: It's Sapnap's B-day today. I need your help!

Grian whispers to Everyone: What can we do for you?

Stressmonster101 whispers to Everyone: Ooh! Birthday fun!

You whisper to Everyone: Meet me at the community Skeleton spawner and I'll explain more.

Dream grabbed his hoodie, food and axe before he ran out his base. He stopped by Sapnap's hole and left a sign for the demon with the words:

Hi birthday boy!  Ready for your bday?

Follow the trail and you will prevail.

- :)

He placed the sign in front of Sapnap's doorway and set off to get to Ranboo's survival shed they made in the beginning of the server. He flew there as fast as could, waving at Stress and False, who were also on their way there. "Mind telling us what your planning?" False chuckled. "Well, I need to plan out a trail to keep Sapnap busy until 5 today..." Dream said, diving down fast to slide into the spawner. False and Stress followed and panted as they looked at Dream rumaging through the chests.

"How does he survive all of those reckless things he does?" Stress asked. "I feel like it's his MCC practice." False reassured the other, making the server-appointed nurse shake her head in disappointment. "You Mcc participantsare always so hard on your bodies. You guys need to relax sometimes." Stress said. "Doc took your advice!" False said, jumping when Dream screamed. "Yes! He's gonna love this!" Dream said, holding the used bows. "What is it?" False asked. "Sapnap's always wanted a flame/infinity bow, but he always had terrible luck with enchantments and mob drops... So I figured I'd repair this bow and find a mending book and apply it to this bow, that way Sapnap won't have to worry." Dream said.

"He's so precious!" Bdubs sobbed, wiping his big eyes free of tears. It didn't help. The other hermit had to resort in using Doc's labcoat as a tissue for his eyes. The rest of the server gathered around the rooms Dream explained his plan for the day. The girls and children would set out to a small flower field nearby and message Dream the coordinates so he could weave the little scavenger hunt he had in mind for Sapnap their way. Impulse and Doc would go with them to help set up the area for Sapnap. The builders who wanted to go would help build a massive cake and help with whatever the others needed help with. Cub and X volunteered, leaving the others to wonder what their jobs were. Which prompted Dream to smile.

"We're gonna play a mini game of an old game Me, George, and Sapnap used to play. Manhunt. I'll teach you a little bit of the game, and how to play, and we'll scatter about the trail I have planned." Dream said. "Why manhunt?" Bdubs asked, taking his shoe off to take the redstone dust out from there. Why did he- Nevermind! Don't question Bdubs....

"It was the only game we played besides chess that he actually enjoyed. His dad, Badboyhalo always tried to get him to be more 'normal' but with Sapnap, normal was running after his friends with a stick." Dream said before he sighed. "Then we grew up and yeah, things happened!" Dream said, scratching his neck a little. 

"Dream, what about us minors?" Purpled asked. "Ah, yes... The most important people of this plan. You guys ready?" Dream said, making the teens nod. "I need you guys to wake up George and Sapnap in the most bizarre way you can." Dream snickered. "Why George?" Tubbo asked. "Because that man can sleep. I wanna see if you guys can wake him up." Dream said. He kind of forgot the minors existed. 

The group nodded and dispersed, leaving Dream with two bows and a mending book to find. 

Geminitay whispers to you: Dream, False told me about you needing a mending book, I have villagers with that if you'd like to get it.

You whisper to Geminitay: Thank you so much Gem!

You whisper to Geminitay: Where do you live again?

Geminitay whispers to you: I'm the castle in the mountains near Ravinworld

You whisper to Geminitay: Oh, you're that close? Nice!

Dream set the bows on an anvil close by and merged the two bows together, picking up the bow and inspecting the enchantments. "Good, I just need to get to Gem's." Dream said, flying over to her base as fast as he could. When he got there, the villager hall was easy for him to spot. There was a huge emerald over it. Thanks Gem!

Drema ran inside and looked for the villager. The villager that held mending was named Reginald. Dream saw the trade Reginald requested and quickly made the 3 books and 4 pieces of paper to get the mending book. Dream thanked Reginald and applied it to the bow right as the coordinates of the flower field was sent to him.

<PearlescentMoon: 70, 209, 68>

<Dream: Thank you>

Tubbo_ was slain by Georgenotfound

<Ranboo: WHY>

<Purpled: Not pog George>

<Georgenotfound: It's 10 in the morning, let me sleep.>

<Dream: Stress, can u do that sleep magic you did on me?>

<Stressmonster101: You mean make you work your butt off to the point of exhaustion?>

<Dream: :D>

<Falsesymmetry: I take that as a yes.>

Dream set off to Ravineworld and began to leave Sapnap the trail he needed to put down. He noticed that Sapnap had already left his room and he almost panicked until he heard the familiar humming and lava splashing. Great! he's in a lava bath! That's enough time for Dream to start the trail!

The blonde set down and chest and book he had written out with the words "Hi Sapnap! Happy Birthday, anyway! I have a gift for you, but I need you to earn this gift. You're probably thinking "But it's my birthday!" but I want to tire you out on your birthday. And what better way to do so than to make you follow a path that leads to your gift! All you need to do is read this book, break the chest and follow the orange concrete blocks" 

Dream nodded and set off to make the trail to the flower field. He made sure to make stations for the manhunt participants and told which pair where to go. Mumbo and Grian were the first pair to go against Sapnap, then Keralis and Tango, then Ren and TFC, then Scar and Jevin, Bdubs and Etho, Hypno and Iskall, Wels and Zedaph, xB and Beef and finally, Joe would be referee. Dream figured the other would rather not fight and see who got who first. Dream nodded at the players in each station and left a sign right at the edge of home. 

Caution:

Manhunt ahead.

NON-LEATHAL escapes only

Dream then headed off to teach the groups how to play non-leathal manhunt. Which Scar yelled "There's a lethal version!?" Poor Jevin... While Dream then mapped out the rest of the trail, Sapnap had just gotten out from his lavabath. Karl was sitting onhis bed with a smile. "What's wrong?" Sapnap said. "Well, Guessing from the sign here, something special is up, and I want to tell you happy birthday before you leave." Kal said. "Leave? Why?" Sapnap whimpered. "It's your birthday! And I hear someone has a surprise waiting for you~!" Karl sang.

The ravenette looked at the chest and signs before he sighed. "Ok... But, someone better help me with the amount of mining I'm gonna miss." Sapnap said. "Worry about work later, have fun on your birthday!" Karl said, pushing Sapnap up to the chest.

Dream panted as he skidded to a halt to quickly make a loop-d-loop for Sapnap's trail to 21. He just came up with that now. "Potions... Gappls... Oh! Diamond! Good!" Dream said, placing those objects in a shulker box and placing the orange block next to it. He kept weaving around as he heard Sapnap's happy giggled and Grian's screeches for Mumbo's help ring from far away. 

"That was quick..." Dream said, picking up the paceto get to the flower field. He made it and Doc stopped him from stepping forward. "Tripwire, step up and over." Doc said, making Dream do the motion. Yogurt ran up to him and hugged his leg. "Hi mama!" Yogurt giggled, making Dream scoop up the small fox and kiss the kid's face all over. "Hi, Yogy!" Dream giggled, smiling at the fox's small smile. "Uncle Sapnap on his way, yeah?" He said. Dream nodded and the little one gasped. "Oh! I don't have a gift for him!" He sniffled.

"I've got a few potions for spare." Dream said, handing the small fox a potion of night vision. "For Uncle Sapnap, ok? Don't drink it or lose it, ok?" Dream said, making Yogurt nod. Dream set the small fox and went to help whoever needed help. Which happened to be Impulse. "Dream! Great! I need your help!" Impulse said. The blonde walked over and sat next to Impulse. "Hm?" Dream said.

"Do you have water on you?" Impulse asked. Dream brought out a bucket he always carried around with some water left. "Here you go." Dream said. The rest of the hermits waddled over to the field. Once Doc saw the group, he sighed and disabled the tripwire and waited for the small group to get in and be patched up by himself, Pearl, and Stress. Impulse re-enabled the tripwire right as the last batch wandered in. 

"Where's Sapnap?" Pearl asked. "He's on his path. I made a path for the manhunters to get here faster than him." Dream said. The group waited and talked until they heard the familiar 'My feet hurt!' Thank god the minors, George, and Karl had made it before Sapnap too.

"He's here! Places everyone!" Dream said, making everyone hide inside the cake Cub and X built. Right as Sapnap set off the tripwire to set off the fireworks in his colors, the server broke out from the cake screaming "Happy birthday!" Sapnap's smile was huge! Bigger than Bdubs'! And that's saying something.

"Thank you guys!" Sapnap said, hugging everyone. "We have gifts too!" Scar said with everyone nodding. Sapnap let everyone give him his gift and thanked them all. When it came time for Dream to give him the bow he got, he was nervous. By he, I mean both of them. "Hey." Dream said. "Hey." Sapnap repeated. "Uh, I know You've always wanted this, and I hope you still do? A-Anyway, here." Dream said, handing Sapnap the repaired bow from before. 

"Is this what I think it is?" Sapnap asked, checking the enchantments. "It is! Thank you Dream!" Sapnap yelled, hugging Dream. "Don't just thank me. Thank the entire server. They had to go along with my last-minute plan to slow you down enough for me to get this just right for you." Dream said, making the fire demon's eyes well up with firey tears. Impulse had to put a bucket below Sapnap's eyes so his tears didn't cause a fire. 

What? Sapnap is a good source of lava and fire when things get tough ok? "I love this server!" Sapnap said, hugging everyone. 

Chapter Text

Badboyhalo joined the game

Skeppy joined the game

Antfrost  joined the game

Punz  joined the game

Hannahxxrose  joined the game

Ponk  joined the game

FoolishG joined the game

itsFundy joined the game

CaptainPuffy joined the game

<Grian: X?>

<Xisumavoid: I see it>

<ImpulseSV: We really need better security...>

<Rendog: Our last system was destroyed with the moon>

<ImpulseSV: Oh>

<Docm77: HA!>

Dream's breath quickened as he read the names over. Oh god. The egg made it here. He was sure they were still infected with that thing. Why else would they be here? "G-George! Take the children and hide them. P-please!" Dream said. "What? Why?" George asked. "T-The egg. It's here! They have that virus still!" Dream said, hurrying to grab an axe and shield. Sapnap stopped him as  he was about to put on his chestplate. "Dream, The egg was contained." Sapnap said. "From what you heard... I still feel the SMP. It's not contained and it's stronger now... I have to do what I have to do." Dream said. 

"And that is?" Sapnap asked. Dream looked at Sapnap and George and smiled. "I'm gonna decapitate them and throw their bodies in Mumbo's moon shrine that he re-created by the spawn island." The blond said in an eerily cheerful tone. "Ok, Nightmare. We get it, you also despise the egg." Sapnap said, making the other look defeated. "I;m that easy to notice now, huh?" the watcher said. "Yeah. I won't tell you how I know, but yeah." Sapnap said. "I best be off before they corrupt this place." Nightmare said, using Dream's wings to get to spawn. Sapnap got his communicator and notified everyone.

<Sapnap: Any green people here?>

<Docm77: Me?>

<Iskall85: How green?>

<iJevin: I'm green today>

<Joehills: Does my hair count? And does Cleo's skin count?>

<ZombieCleo: My skin is pastel green!>

<Sapnap: Doesn't matter. Anyone with red, stay away from Spawn and those guys>

<Sapnap: There was a virus on our old server that affected very few people.>

<Docm77: And green repels it?>

<Sapnap: I'll explain later.>

Bad watched as his son ratted them out. Granted, he knew Sapnap didn't really like that egg, but he was containing it! Kinda? He and the rest of the egg followers are kept on a leash by foolish and Puffy, but that's ok. Foolish is practically holding them at gunpoint, well bow-point. And Fundy and Puffy came along to make sure Foolish could handle them. They all gasped when they saw Dream land in front of them with a diamond axe in his hand.

"You shouldn't be here." Nightmare said, glaring daggers at the batch. "Duckling!" Puffy said, moving forward only to be greeted by Dream's axe being pointed her way. "I'm not Dream, your precious Duckling, right now. Allow me to introduce myself... I'm Nightmare. The little spark of chaos that ultimately made your home a warzone." nightmare gloated, holding Dream's head as the blond yelled at him.

"Y-You're the Dreamon Tubbo and I got rid of?" Fundy said. "No... To be honest, there was no such thing as Dreamons. I'm not one. And you should've fought harder for Dream on your wedding day." Nightmare said, holding his head again before Dreama took control. "L-Look. I know I'm all fucked up, but right now, I need to kill those four before they infect this place. I can't have my home being tainted by them, and you three won't stop me." Dream said. 

"Nightm-" "Dream right now. We're having a mental argument." Dream said, cutting Fundy and Puffy off. "Dream, duckling. Why didn't you tell me that you were dealing with that?" Puffy asked. Dream sighed and got his bow out, shooting each eggpire member with an arrow laced with a sedative strong enough to knock out a ravager. "Because Nightmare was in control for most of the SMP. Now, Foolish, do me a favor and follow me." Dream said. "Wait. This is where you've been? The SMP has been falling apart without you." Fundy said.

"Fundy... If only you knew why I left." Dream said. "So you could protect the revival book, huh?" Fundy shot back. Dream sighed and turned around, motioning for them to follow. "No. The revival book is still on the SMP. Just hidden." Dream said. To be honest, the blond actually destroyed the book and had X erase the book from his memory. He only remembers the cover and name now. 

The group was in awe from how different the place they were at was from the SMP. It was more... Peaceful. "Dream! Are you ok?" Dream heard, looking over to see every green-clad player rushing to his aide. "I'm all good. But I would feel safer if you guys could accompany us to the Moon shrine." Dream said. "Lead the way, Dream!" Joe said. The blond nodded and kept making his way to Mumbo's shrine. 

When they got there, each egg follower screamed at the sight of the soul fire and from seeing all the green-wearing players near them. "What's up with them?" Jevin asked Dream, who sighed. "This is the product of not noticing the differences between a corrupt watcher and a good admin. ON my server, Nightmare up here..." Dream said, knowing his fist on his head. "decided to take my body and cause problems. So one thing led to another, I got thrown into inhumane conditions, I almost died multiple times, a virus weaseled its way into my server and took the form of a giant red egg. Which infected these guys, who tried to infect more people... The only way they dealt with it was by soul fire, obsidian and a random religion we had... We only have two of those things on this server, so I may have to go with the old school method of removing the infection..." Dream said.

"Which is?" Doc asked. Dream bit his nail and leaned over to whisper into Doc's ear. "I have to decapitate them and throw their bodies and head into soul fire..." Dream whispered, making Doc's cybernetic eye flicker. "What? They have no respawn point..." Doc said. "I know... But the longer they stay in one unburnt piece, the greater the chance that the blocks they walk on get affected by that virus." Dream said. "I vote for decapitation," Jevin said.

"Can you guys wrangle all the other green players for me to break the news to? You guys can help my brother watch over them and if you want, growl at 'em." Dream said, noticing Jevin's happy face become happier at the mention of growling at people. The two funneled the other green members off to Dream, who explained what they had to do and took a vote on what to do... 

2 votes for let them set a respawn point...

4 for kill them now.

"Uh... The vote was counted... And the verdict is we kill them now." Joe said. "Who voted for kill?" Iskall asked. Jevin, Dream, Cleo and Doc raised their hands. Wait, there was six votes, and there's seven of us. "Tubbo didn't vote because Dream was holding him back from already doing the deed. "So I'm assuming Tubbo is pro-decap, then?" Joe said. "Sure." Dream said. "You guys finally done over there?" Foolish grumbled. "Hey! Just because you can't die doesn't mean you have to be a meanie head about this!" Dream huffed.

"You guys practically hate each other, and you still act like brothers!" Puffy cheered. "Not now mom." Foolish said. "This is not the time to be cheering, Captain Puffy." Dream said. Each hermit hissed at Dream's tone. The last time each of them heard Dream's tone like this was when Tommy threw a bucket of honey on him in the middle of the minigame district. Tubbo still shivers from the memory of hearing Drea saying the words "Tommy, You have a three-second headstart." in that tone.

"You guys better advert your eyes... Whoever would to like to help with this, step up now..." Dream said. Foolish walked over next to Dream and smiled. Then Doc. Then Jevin. Then Tubbo. Cleo. Iskall... Joe stayed behind, covering his eyes. "Joe's been on a no-pvp rule... Cleo said. "Oh. It's ok, Joe." Dream said, nodding to Joe. The other went over to Puffy and Fundy and made them turn around.

Dream nodded to each person and they got positioned to do the deed.

Hannahxxrose was slain by ZombieCleo

Punz was slain by Dream

Badboyhalo was slain by FoolishG

Ponk was slain by Iskall85

Antfrost was slain by Tubbo_

Skeppy was slain by iJevin

<Falsesymmetry: Woah! Good job you guys!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: False, this is not a good time to advertise killing...>

<Grian: You go boys!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: GRIAN>

<Badboyhalo: What the muffin was that for!?>

<Sapnap: My dad is back!>

<Skeppy: Why do I feel like I got hit by a damn train?>

<Xisumavoid: Watch your mouth!>

<Badboyhalo: Language!>

<Georgenotfound: Hey! Bad's back to normal!>

Dream smiled as he pushed (kicked) the last fallen body into the sea of soul fire. He watched as it burned and listened to the screams of the vines inside their bodies let out. "You seem a bit too familiar to this." Foolish said, making Dream hum. "You get used to it when you're trapped inside your head and all you can do is observe as the world around you crumples." Dream said, kicking an infected vinelette back into the fire that it managed to wiggle out from. 

"You were kind of bitter to Mom back there," Foolish said. "I'm sorry that I was bitter to the woman who stole me from my homeland, abandoned me once I was 10 in human years, then replaced me with a godling who was better than me in every way possible. I'm sorry that I hurt her feelings after she crushed mine by not noticing my hints of saying save me. I'm sorry she ignored my calls for help when Nightmare was getting so difficult to fight off. I'm sorry that my go-to way of saying help is following the person I need help from. I'm even sorry for being gullible enough to believe that a disembodied voice would lead me to diamonds." Dream said, throwing an arrow at an incoming creeper to the left of him.

"I'm the one who should be sorry, Dream. You were calling out for help and I told her you were just looking for attention." Foolish said. Dream scoffed and turned around to leave. "Look, Go back to the SMP. Exdee is gonna need all the help he can get." Dream said. "He threw me here. Sam and Quackity are trying to get back here to bring you back to the SMP. Exdee isn't backing down from letting them out. Wilbur is looking for you too. So is Connor and many others." Foolish said.

"I can tell. The SMP is still connected to me and I can feel the remaining members. Niki is sorrowful, Wilbur is numb, Connor is confused, Jack is angry, Sam and Quackity are obsessed with finding me, Slime is... Slime is lost. H is looking for you... Eret is fabulous... The list goes on..." Dream said. Foolish laughed at Dream's response. "When is Eret not?" The god asked.

"I dunno. That royal knows how to pull off 9-inch heels, a strawberry dress, and a crown with shades. No one else can get even close to their sense of fashion." Dream said. The brothers walked back to Spawn where their ex-enemies sat. "You good over there?" Dream yelled, making Skeppy look around. "How'd you get wings?!!" Skeppy yelled. "I repressed my hybrid status. I've always had them!" Dream replied. Grian flew by and landed next to Dream.

"Should we help them over?"Grian asked. "I'll get Sapnap and Purpled... I'm sure those two would like to have a moment with their families. You can begin to help the cat, flower girl, and masked one over to the mainland." Dream said. "Look at you commanding the place like you own it." Foolish said. Dream shrugged and messaged the server that they could safely interact with the newcomers.

Dream laughed when a wave of questions were thrown his way. "I-I've got to go... Bye Foolish." Dream said, setting off to answer everyone's questions in the town hall Grian and Scar made in the shopping district. Foolish sighed as he looked around. "There's no way am I letting Quackity ruin this for you, Dream. I messed up once. I can't do it again." Foolish said.

Chapter Text

"Well, I'm not registering any viruses or abnormalities within their code... They should be safe to roam free now." X said, looking at the new arrivals that Sapnap boxed up in a glass container with a sign that had 'Caution: From DSMP. Do not interact' on it. Dream made sure to bap the younger on the head when he had a chance to... "I don't want them out yet, Xisuma..." Purpled huffed, hiding behind Impulse and sticking his tongue out at Punz, who flipped Purpled off playfully. 

"Hey! Watch your body language!" Cleo yelled, banging on the glass. Skeppy sobbed as Sapnap retold the troubles the six of them caused. Let's just say the trolling player felt terrible for making their 'step-son' fear living anywhere near the mainland or the badlands. Dream broke two block out of the glass box and waved the six out.

"Ok... Rules are simple. Have fun, you are allowed to grief each other but do not cross the line where things can't be replaced, and most importantly, make yourself at home." X said. "Also, just a rule directed to you guys. If you see something that seems less dangerous than normal... Don't approach it." Dream said. "So, don't approach a chicken?" Hannah teasingly asked. 

"Those are cool. Just don't approach llamas. Those guys are mean." Grian said, shooting a zombie that was chilling under a tree. "Ah! Not Rigor Mortis!" Tango cried, holding his hair. Impulse pat at Tango's back and smiled. "We'll get another one... And! We can fish up more name tags!" Impulse said. "I'm tempted to call Mr. Tango mom..." Purpled whispered to Dream, who snorted.

The blond waved off his laughter as him seeing something funny. The group vaguely heard the words wolf, faceplant, cute, and funny. Puffy tried to get close enough to speak with Dream, but the ender dragon used his many years of parkour skills to evade her. He even went as far as pushing a creeper in between them. Poor creeper was confused as to why one of the admins of the server used it as their personal entity shield. 

Dream had messaged the coordinates to X and the others to where he found the perfect spot for the new arrivals to set up. Dream had placed them on the side of a mountain with a savanna, mesa, and oak forest nearby. When the blond went to leave, Puffy stopped him. "Duckling?" She asked. Dream sighed and smiled. "Yes, Puffy?" Dream asked, tilting his head to hide the pulsating blood vessels in his neck. Sadly, he couldn't hide the pissed-off look his smile held. He never was good at controlling his facial expressions! Nightmare was a god at it, but Dream? Might as well have him roll a D20 and hope he gets a number higher than 18... 

"I was wondering if you'd like some mother and son time?" She said. Dream hissed and shook his head. "Not in a while, Puffy... I... I have many chores and responsibilities to do with Xisuma... Maybe in the next 75 years..." Dream said, knowing damn well, in 75 years he'd look the same and she'd be long gone. What? Let him have his grudge ok? Mans been stuck in his head for however long he was on the SMP without her even noticing the physical changes! 

Actually, no one noticed them... Not even Sapnap or George. Then again, the only people who would actually notice would be Exdee and Drista. Come to think of it, he wondered if the SMP had imploded on itself yet. Dream shook his head to rid himself of the sad revelations and slinked past Puffy and the group with one last thing to say.

"Remember, You are allowed in the end here. Just be careful! And stay inside during full moons, ok?" Dream said, setting off into the sky with Foolish yelling at him to explain more. The blond quickly flew home, wiping tears from his eyes before they fell down his face and burnt him. It wasn't because he was emotional... It was because karma decided to fuck with his peaceful life with others like him. He crashed into his hidey-hole and slinked to his bed, curling up in the covers to cry himself to sleep. He'll patch up the gaping Dream-sized hole in the wall in the morning.

~~~

The next day, everyone in Ravineworld made sure Dream was ok. George made the admin soup, Sapnap tried to playfully spar with the other, that didn't go well. Seriously! Dream ended kicking the fire boy into a wall out of pure rage instead of instinct. Poor Sapnap. Impulse attempted to give Dream a crash course in a redstone powered training area, but Dream didn't register half of what was going on. Mumbo gave Dream one of his trained chickens he didn't kill. Dream let Patches play with them... Tubbo and Ranboo made Dream flower crowns, which the older happily wore, Tommy and Purpled asked the other if he had any way for them to help out around the server, which Dream told them to round up every good builder and to head to the coordinates where Bad and the others were allowed to make their homes.

That meant Tommy forced Etho, Doc, Zedaph, Tango, Bdubs, and Cub while Purpled politely bribed Wels, Hypno, Beef, and TFC, although the younger had no idea that TFC was almost 60-something and was shocked to see a gray-haired man climbing up high walls without a care in the world. Before the group set off to go get the blocks they'd need, Dream made sure to give each and every one of them a protection rune in case stuff happened. Tommy led the group while Etho planned his next minigame. The Canadian had an odd train of thought.

That left Dream to deal with Scar, Grian, and Pearl... Scar was easy to deal with. All Dream had to do was call Foolishfor help and the blond would abandon his 'brother' with a vex hybrid who was a god at dying. Grian and Pearl were hard to shake. He had to suck it up and let them lecture him about accepting his dispositions. 

"So, you die the most on this server?" Foolish asked Scar. The vex chuckled and nodded. "Mhm! Good ol' Scar here is leading the leaderboard of most deaths by a whole 2000 deaths! The second most deaths on this server are at 289." Scar said. "A-And you've never once been visited by lady death or the god of your server?" Foolish asked. "No... Then again, we don't have a three-lives system. We have an 'as long you have a bed you're good' system here..." Scar said, letting Jellie plop herself in his lap. "Can you pass me my leg braces over there?" Scar asked, pointing to the diamond-infused golden leg braces Doc made for Scar. The other did so and watched in awe at how quick it was for Scar to get them on. 

"Alright... Can you pull me up on my feet, please? Usually, Tubbo is here to help, but teens will be teens." Scar said, sighing at the thought of the ram hybrid. Foolish nodded and carefully pulled Scar up. "Ok! Now, let's go and help Ren out with his base." Scar said. Foolish followed behind, blindly.

Both jumped when their communicators went off.

<PearlescentMoon: Hey! Me and Grian are making Dream bake to relieve some stress, anyone want to join?>

<Geminitay: I do!>

<Stressmonster101: I love baking>

<Falsesymmetry: I'm not too good at it, but I'll join>

<ZombieCleo: Are we doing normal baking or hybrid specific?>

<Dream: Whichever you feel, Miss Cleo>

<ZombieCleo: Dream, just call me Cleo.>

<CaptainPuffy: Can Hannah and I join too?>

<Stressmonster101: If you'd like>

Dream's upper lip twitched in disdain. Pearl noticed and playfully nudged his side. "Don't let your anger show, ok? That's why we're baking! You can make bread! That way, you can beat up something without letting Nightmare get out of hand!" Pearl said. "Say, you never told me about your side..." Dream said. Pearl sighed and rubbed the back of her neck. "Some stories are best left alone." Grian told the other.

The three made their way to the bakery, Dream really needs to meet up with Sam Nook to discuss names for this place. He can't keep calling it 'the bakery', sounds too sketchy. The three entered and began to set up for the big baking party Pearl made on a whim. Stress was the first to arrive. The brunette beauty hugged each of them and made sure they were eating well. In fact, Dream may have slipped up a few times and called her mom.

Actually, he slips up with every girl on the server. He called Pearl by ma one time when he needed help with the inside of his starter hole, then he called Gem by mom when he fell off her roof after he helped her detangle a rogue vine from the shingles. Then he yelled the words Mama Cleo to get Cleo's attention from her armor stand scene she was working on to ask her opinion on a shulker box trade he was thinking about doing with Tango (Newsflash, Tango got jipped a few stacks of redstone dust, but blame Impulse.) and Stress was called Mum just because of her overall look. False was lucky enough to get Auntie Falsie. Not that Dream didn't see her as a motherly figure! He just associated False with that one Aunt who always comes to the family gathering all battered and bruised with a confident smirk on her face 24/7

Like, once Dream got to know her, his brain immediately said 'mama figure, she's safe' and Dream was back in duckling mode. Dream's small smile made Stress's heart swell in pride. False and Gem arrived shortly after with Cleo in tow. "Oh! You guys made it!" Stress smiles. "How long have you been here?" Gem asked, slinking over to high five Pearl. "Not that long... How was the fly here?" Stress asked. "Amazing. I got to smack Bdubs off a tree." Cleo laughed. "You hit Bdubs?" False asked. "I'm still a little angry at him for dropping my armor stand book in his little pond." Cleo said. "Worth it." Gem said.

The six hermits (yes, Dream counts himself as a hermit at this point) all laughed and discussed what baked good they wanted to make. Gem and Pearl argued over who could make a better apple cinnamon pie. Grian tried, keyword is tried, to get the girls to accept the fact that Dream makes the best pie he's ever tasted, but those two were dead set on making an apple cinnamon pie. Stress decided that she'd make a chocolate cake, while False thought about making carrot cake. Grian and Dream stuck with making bread. Cleo decided she'd try pumpkin pie. 

Puffy and Hannah shyly peeked their heads inside and were welcomed in by Stress and Gem. Cleo eyed Hannah while the flower girl walked by. "I still think we should crack 'er head open again." Cleo whispered to Dream, who playfully smacked her arm. "Shh, Don't plot out loud." Dream joked. Honestly, he wasn't truly looking forward to seeing Puffy. Prison does a lot to a person when half of the things they've done was done by another version of themselves. He still remembers banging on the walls of his mind. His screams for Puffy to notice the difference still haunt him whenever he's in the dark. 

"I'm gonna go get the ingredients from the back..." Dream said, scooting away to the backrooms. He sat on a barrel of sugar with his head in his hands. "What're you doing?" Nightmare asked. "Sulking and debating if I should break the window back here to escape this situation." Dream sighed. "And what is running away from this accomplish? You'll still be angry at you mom, the hermits who are here will worry about you and possibly put you under constant surveillance, and your home would feel like a healthy version of the prison we were in." Nightmare said. "When did you become all sane and helpful?" Dream asked. "Let's just say Xelqua is terrifyingly dominant." Nightmare said.

"In the sexua-" 

"Not that way, stupid!" Nightmare yelled, making Dream yank his head back. He sighed and got off the barrel to move it into the baking area. Then the flour, eggs, yeast (how they made is beyond me) and milk before he began walking back to the group. "All done!" Dream said. Stress shot up first, giving Dream an appreciative smile. The False with her signature elbow jab, then Cleo with a fist bump, Gem and Pearl were the two who always gave him hugs. Why? In Gem's words, Dream is a loveable teddy bear who has seen better days and is getting the therapy he needs. Puffy and Hannah nodded at Dream and then Grian and Pearl pulled him to his workstation. 

"I'm trusting you two to not set the place on fire." Pearl said. "Pearl... I bake for a living here. It's Grian who you should worry about." Dream said, measuring his flour, yeast, water, and salt. He was surprised he managed to get salt from filtering sea water, but hey! Two ingredients for the price of one water bucket!

The baking was doing great! Gem and Pearl got pie syrup on their noses. Cleo was busy eating her pie filling while watching Puffy and Hannah try to figure out how to use the industrial oven Mumbo had set the place up with. False had finished her cake and was munching away at the leftover frosting she had, Grian and Dream were just placing their proofed dough in the bread pans by the time the SMP girls figured out the oven. Stress, being the mother we all know she is, had finished long ago.

"Dream! How do you deal with this thing?" Hannah asked. "Practice?" Dream questioned, making grabby hands towards False's frosting. "No way, no sugar for you, mister." False said. "What!? Why not!?" Dream huffed. "You and I have a sparring match later today." She said. "Then why are you eating sugar?" Grian asked, helping Gem and Pearl with cutting out strips of pie crust. "Because Dream still hasn't beaten me yet. Techno has many times, but Dream's gotten close." False said, popping the frosting spoon in her mouth again. 

"Woah, Dream losing a sparring match? What happened to the undefeated tyrant from the SMP?" Hannah joked. "He killed himself." Dream said. "Don't say that." Stress said, rubbing Dream's back. "No really! In order for me to make that portal that started this whole thing, I actually died." Dream said. "No way... And you have no scars to prove it?" Hannah asked. "I do... You just don't wanna see it. It's real nasty looking." Dream lied. 

It was a white lie, but he'd rather not have the group worry about why he still had a sharp shard of crying obsidian lodged up against his heart. All he needed was for one of the hermits to tell Doc and have the cybernetic german creeper tackle him and operate on him to get it out. 

~~~

"I'm telling you, since more members of the SMP have dropped here, he's been getting more and more distant. I feel like he's falling back into the same pattern from the SMP." Sapnap told George, who sighed and sat back into his crop field of wheat, carrots and beeroot. Techno explicitly told/threatened George about him being the potato king. "Look... Dream's still getting used to seeing all of us without any malice in our eyes." George said. "I know, but did you hear what happened the night after the other got situated in their plot of land he scouted for them? He bust a hole in his wall and fixed it the next day. I was able to get a peek into his room and saw it was a mess. He's uncomfortable with them." Sapnap said.

"Sapnap! He's uncomfortable with all of us because he saw how we all didn't notice that Nightmare was in control of the server and causing the chaos! We all assumed Dream was the one causing it, but he was just trying to fix it! Yes, we're here now, and have been here for a few months, maybe even a year, and he's still getting used to us." George said. "He's fine around me and Phil." Techno casually said, startling Sapnap and George. "When the hell did you get here!?" Sapnap gasped, holding his chest.

"During George's speech. I just heard yelling and thought 'Well, the voices say let's go check this out' and here we are." Techno said. "Anyway! You said he's fine around you and Phil?" George asked. "Mmm... Yeah. Maybe it's because we didn't see him as a threat and as an ally?" Techno said. "Then again, the voices and I weren't too keen on people." Techno said, kicking a small leftover pebble that someone forgot to clean up. The three were about to say something else when Scar flops on the floor between them, dropping all his items and puffing into smoke.

GoodtimeswithScar fell from a high place

<Dream: Foolish! I gave you to Scar to stop this!>

<FoolishG: How am I supposed to stop a crazy vex from trying to fly with a broken elytra?>

<Grian: Tell him it's broken?>

<ZombieCleo: You good Scar?>

<GoodtimeswitScar: Best death I've had!>

<BdoubleO100: Ladies and Gentlemen, behold our mayor of season 7>

<ImpulseSV: Go Scar!>

<Tango: You mean Scap>

<Tubbo_: ?>

<Tommyinnit: Tango, I think I killed one of your drowned in your game again.>

<Tango: Wait... Aren't you supposed to be helping us make homes with those guys the green peeps killed?>

<Tommyinnit: Uh>

<Xisumavoid: I've got him>

<Sapnap: Ohh! Bdubs! Can you tell me more about season 7?>

<BdoubleO100: Sure fireboy>

<Sapnap: Thank's Uncle Bdubs!>

<Falsesymmetry: Let me get this straight...>

<Falsesymmetry: Dream calls me Auntie Falsie... And you get Sapnap to call you Uncle Bdubs?>

<Dream: I still love you Auntie.>

<Sapnap: Same here, Uncie!>

<Dream: Uncie?>

<Sapnap: XP>

"Sapnap, we need to work on your english." George said. "What!?" Sapnap huffed. 

Chapter Text

Xisuma sighed as they passed Tommy's unfinished 'merch' shop. They remembered the teen promised them he'd finish it by the time the tournament of games came along, but Tommy never got back to it. It started to make the co-admin worry. Which prompted them to call a hermit meeting.

<Xisumavoid: All Original hermits! Hermit meeting at The Rock at high noon!>

<Grian: When's high noon?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Where's the rock?>

<Tango: What's a hermit meeting?>

<ImpulseSV: Wow, we really need to do some more drills on this...>

<ZombieCleo: Impulse, we need more that drills for this.>

<BdoubleO100: I got it! We should have handbooks!>

<Grian: Don't say anything Scar>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Aw man...>

X shook their head and made his way to the spot. They had a bad feeling about the well-being of the newer hermits. The admin passed by Techno's base and went to check on him when they heard a growl. "Tech? You alright?" X asked, receiving a quick 'I'm fine' and then a stern 'go away please'. The admin sighed and did so, faintly catching Techno say 'I should've asked them to shut the voices up...' Poor Techno. Phil was doing no better, the avian was sitting in his treehouse when X came by. 

"You good there, Philza?" X asked. "I'm great mate. Just remembering things." Phil said. "If you ever need an ear to listen, all of hermits are willing to sit with you and let you rant." X said. Phil gave a nod and leaned back to look at the sky. Maybe he missed someone or home? Maybe they'll bring this up with Grian. Those two are brothers after all! Close brothers? No... But X wondered why they drifted apart... 

Noon came around faster than X anticipated. In fact, they may have been so involved in cleaning the inside of this rock... They still remember when Ranboo made this all on their own. The screams of excitement that Grian, Scar, and Pearl let out made X's heart swell in love for the server. They also remember when Dream flew face-first into the side of the rock trying to escape a rogue vex that chased him from Impulse's and Tango's raid farm. X smiled at the memory of the blond crying while they cleaned the bump on his head and wrapped it up to prevent the boy from bleeding out.

Poor Dream. Sometimes, Dream reminded X of a baby ender dragon. Full of energy, a little shaken up in the head, and emotional.

The admin was poked by Ren. "You alright dude?" Ren asked. "Hm? I'm ok, Ren. Just worrying about our new additions." X said. "You've noticed too?" False asked, sitting next to X. "What do you mean?" Ren asked. "Well, Techno and Dream are less involved in sparring. Dream isn't as fast and Techno isn't in tune with his weapon anymore." False said. "Not to mention whenever I waved at Dream, he'd shy away and hide." Ren said. "Why is that? Last I heard from Puffy was that there weren't any werewolves on their server. The closest they had was Fundy, the fox that popped in with those guys who some of us killed." Stress said, scaring the bejeebus out of the three.

"How long have you been here?!" Ren gasped. "I've been sitting here since you guys mentioned Dream being sad... My poor baby dragon." Stress sniffled before her expression changed into one of anger. "If I ever find out who hurt him, I'll rip their spleen out and shove it down their throat." She said. "Remind me not to mess with Stress." Ren said. "Hey, that rhymes!" X said. 

The rest of the hermits piled into the meeting area. Grian, Scar, Impulse, Mumbo, and Pearl stumbled more or less. "You Boatems ok over there?" Tango chuckled. "You wanna handle seven emotional people at the same time?" Impulse grumbled, leaning onto Pearl for support. "Is everyone here?" X asked. "Yep. TFC might be a tad late since he's doing some type of mining expedition?" Iskall said. 

"We'll fill him in when he gets here." X said, making the hermits nod. "First order of business! The tournament... How many of you are done with your games?" X asked. Stress, Etho, Bdubs, Tango, and Zedaph raised their hands. "That's not a lot of people... Ok... Has anyone else noticed our new arrivals have been... Different lately?" X asked, getting a better reaction. "Can you guys name a few things you've noticed?" They pried.

"Well, Techno is at my mob farm more often." Iskall said. "Ranboo has been stalking my puppy with the lime green collar..." Stress said. "Tubbo's been cooped up in his... Is it called a hidey-hole if it's a composter he stole?" Scar asked. "Not to mention Tommy climbing in with Shroud and Micheal," Grian added. "No one noticed how Sapnap's axe throws got closer and closer to Dream's name?" Mumbo gawked. 

"WHAT!?" The others yelled. "Sapnap throws axes!?" Scar gasped. "I don't think George is any better... He been growing poisonous mushrooms off his arms and hair more often. Dream's tried to pick a few to eat them and I keep stopping him. He ends up crying on my shoulder..." Pearl said. "I think they're relapsing... In their trauma and their past." X said. "So, what do we do?" Gem asked. 

"We make them forget those bad times." Grian said. "How? Most of our minigames aren't done." Scar said. "Those who are done can take turns with making sure they stay alive. Those who need to finish their games, get crackin'. Ok?" Grian said. "Who would've thought our pesky bird is a good leader?" Etho laughed. "I did." Pearl said. "Shh!" Grian huffed. 

The hermits disbanded and the five who were done with their minigames went to go make sure the newer hermits were doing great. "Hey Dream!" Tango said, making the blond look at Tango. "H-Hi..." Dream said. "Say, why don't you join us for a walk, hm?" Tango said. "A-Am I allowed?" Dream asked. "Of course, man. Stress has been worried about you." Tango said. Dream perked up at the mention of Stress. "Mum? Mumma's worried?" Dream whimpered, going over to Stress to hug her.

"Poor baby... What's wrong?" Stress said. Dream tapped his head and Stress gasped. "Now, Dream... What did we say about being up in there?" Stress said. "Make sure you have a backdoor..." Dream said. "C'mere..." Stress said, wrapping her arms around Dream's waist and tossing him over he shoulder. 

She may be small, but she is strong. "I still can't get over the fact that Stress and carry everyone on the server..." Zedaph said. The group went around checking up on everyone, checking their communicators every now and then to see who finished their minigame. So far, Grian, Beef, Keralis, Cleo, Jevin, Scar, Mumbo, Impulse, Gem, Wels, Joe, xB, Xisuma, and False had finished. That meant that 14 out of the 26 original members of Hermitcraft were done with their minigames. All they needed was twelve more people to finish!

"Tommy! How's the stall doing?" Bdubs asked, scaring the younger. "U-Uh... I forgot about it... I-I'll get right to it!" Tommy said. "You ok, Tommy?" Bdubs asked, holding the boy's shoulders. "I-I'm..." Tommy started before he broke down, much like Dream. "I can't be normal can I?! I-I cause trouble and build horrible towers... Why can't I be like Uncle Grian or Uncle Scar?" Tommy hiccuped. "Hey, You don't have to be like G or Scar. You can be yourself and build however you like. Tommy, you can be yourself here. Build how you like. Now, C'mon, kiddo. Wanna steal some ice cream from Tango?" Bdubs said, making Tommy smile. 

~~~

<Xisumavoid: Is everyone ready for the games?>

<iJevin: I am>

<Falsesymmetry: Get ready to have your butts kicked!>

<Tubbo_: Arson!>

<Ranboo: No>

<Grian: Everyone, to the Minigame arena!>

The server gathered at the arena, giggling and joking about. X explained the tournament and how it'll work. They hadn't done something like this, but since most of the server participated in MCC, they had to make a version of their own. "Hello everyone! Welcome to the Tournament of games!" X said. The server cheered and jumped about.

"I can't wait to play your game, Mumbo!" Grian said. "You guys made the games? Does that mean just you guys can play them?" Tubbo sniffled. "Everyone can play them. These are for everyone." Mumbo said. "Oh." Tubbo said. "Papa Scar!!!! You're playing one of the games with me!" Tubbo said, running over to tackle Scar. 

"Have fun, and remember, follow the game's rules!" X said, ushering everyone into the game district. Sapnap dragged Dream and George to Mumbo's Chance game. "Press your luck on the shulker before you... Is it the mob or the block?" Sapnap said. "Dream, you go first!" Sapnap said, pushing Dream in front of the purple mass in the bullseye. "Go on... We're right behind you!" George said, hiding behind Sapnap, who was behind Dream. 

The there waddled over and got close to the box. Dream tapped it and sighed in relief finding it was a shulker box. "Phew... Wah! Dream help!" George yelled, holding Sapnap's head for dear life while he started to levitate. "Sapnap, hold on tight, ok?" Dream said, holding onto Sapnap's arm. George clung to Sapnap while he shrieked and begged for help. "Hold a bit longer, George. You have only 10 more seconds of this." Dream laughed while the 3 walked around the tournament. 

"You cheater!" Tommy yelled at Techno, who shrugged. "You're just bad at this." Techno coyly said, shooting another bullseye. "Wow, who's game is this?" Dream asked. George's 10 seconds of floating wore off and he fell on top of Sapnap. "My game!" Bdubs said, popping his head out from underneath the game teller's area. "Who's winning?" Tommy huffed. "Whoever is one the left!" Bdubs said, sitting back to let the two fire more shots. "And our winner is... Techno!" Bdubs chuckled. "Let's gooooo!" Techno said in his usual monotone voice. 

"Dream! You guys up for a 4v4?" False yelled, waving the 3 over. "I guess? But we're only 3 people." Dream said. False nodded to Impulse, Ren, Doc, and Iskall. "They're already a team and I figured why not kick their butts with you guys!" False said. "Sure!" Sapnap said, high fiving False. "What's the game we're playing?" George asked. "Dodgeball." She said.

"Hell yeah!" Sapnap said. The two groups started the game and were brought down to 3 hearts each. They were then pushed into the dodgeball arena and a splash potion of  harming 2 was dropped onto the opposing side. "Watch out, those guys are hard to read!" False said. The round ended with Dream being the last one standing on his team against Doc. Dream was given the next splash potion and he threw it on Doc! And himself...

"It's a tie!" X yelled. Both teams groaned and sighed. "So, we go again?" Sapnap asked. "Only if you guys want to." X said. Sapnap gave False the best puppy eyes he could muster, but all she did was shake her head and pat his head. "Drat..." Sapnap huffed. "He's picking up the speech patterns of the Bdubs..." Dream whispered to George, who snorted. "Shut up!" George laughed. 

The hermits who were not busy with games watched over the newer ones, smiling at how happy they seemed. "You know... They've come a long way." Tango hummed to Stress. She smiled and nodded. "You've got a point... But something in me is telling me something horrible is on its way." She said. "It's the motherly panic all mothers have." Keralis said, patting her back. "I guess..." She said. "Besides, you know we'll all fight to keep them safe." Grian said. "When'd he get here?" Tango gasped. "I just finished Etho's tug-o-war! Turns out the loosing team gets covered in paint." Grian said. "He made paint!?" Stress said. "Well... It was just really pigmented water... But Mumbo's suit is no longer black and white." Grian laughed, watching a blue and pink Mumbo Jumbo shuffle towards them. 

"I thought we agreed on the no spamming of the lever rule." The other huffed. "I thought so too... And then I was put in a room with buttons and levers." Grian laughed. 

Chapter Text

Dream jolted and dropped the pickaxe in his hand while he stumbled back and clutched his chest. "Dream!" Sapnap yelled, rushing to his side. "T-The SMP...I-It's dying..." Dream said. "What happened?" X asked, placing a hand on Dream's forehead. Why'd it have to be in the middle of the tournament? "M-My SMP... I-It's dying and trying to pull me back..." Dream explained. "I say we put this on pause and got see what's up over there." Cleo said. 

"That would be a big mistake!" An unfamiliar voice to most of the hermits said. "DRISTA!" Tommy yelled, running to hug the goddess teen. "Tommy!" She yelled, hugging back, twirling the taller boy without a sweat. God magic. "Who is this?" Grian asked. "This is Drista! Dream's sister, even though Dream might not remember." Tommy said. "Well, I assumed you were his sister since you look exactly like him." Tommy said. "I am. I'm the youngest of the SMP gods." Drista said. "Drista, what did we say about getting off topic?" DreamXD asked.

"Whoops! My bad..." Drista said before she cleared her throat. "A-As I was saying, going to the SMP is a sure fire way to get trapped there. It's dying and trying to grab ahold of any administrator it was last connected to. Which is sadly Big brother Dream..." Drista said. "W-Wait! George and I are co admins to the SMP, Callahan too!" Sapnap said. "That is true... Unfortunately, every server is different. They're much like the players who occupy them. In this case... The SMP is fighting to survive and it will do so by any means necessary..." DreamXD said. 

"So you're saying the SMP is killing Dream?" Sapnap said. "More like sucking his life force so it can live. Think of this scenario as a weed in a planter box!" Drista said, earning a firm smack to the head by Exdee. "What? I didn't tell them to envision a crow picking at a dead body!" Drista said, getting a much firmer smack. "Drista, I think you should just shut..." Tommy said.  Drista glared at Tommy from behind her XP mask. 

"Is there a work around or a way to sever ties with the SMP?" Phil asked. "So far, there is one way to stop this..." DreamXD said. The others nodded while Sapnap cradled Dream's head while his body spasmed on the floor. "Which is?" X said. "We must delete his code from the Server... By bringing him to heart of the SMP." Drista said. "WHAT!?" The crowd yelled.

"Didn't you just say the SMP will trap us?" False asked. "Well, yes... But by assigning a new Admin, the SMP will slowly return to normal." Drista said. "We just need a willing person to be the admin..." Drista said. The hermits looked at each other and sighed. "Wanna draw straws?" Grian asked. "No." Everyone groaned.

Last time they drew straws, Philza was the seeker for the server hide and seek. Man used his crows to fucking cheat. "Is there anyone on the SMP left?" George asked. "Just Nihachu, Connor, Jack Manifold, Awesamdude, Quackity, Eryn, Tina, Boomer, Eret, Hbomb, Callahan, and the new ones." Drista said. "New ones?" Sapnap growled. "Mhm! A few new additions were added to compensate for everyone else disappearing." Drista said. "Oh." George said. "W-Wait... C-Calla's still on the SMP?" Dream whimpered, shivering now. Hold up... Is it snowing!?

"They are... Why do you ask big brother?" Drista asked. "C-Callahan's the closest thing to an actual admin on the SMP. T-They've been through most of the admin courses... The last I remembered, they were 5 credits away from being a full fledged admin... I think they needed to pass biome placing." Dream said, attempting to sit up. Sapnap poked his head and the blond fell back into his lap. "You're not leaving my lap anytime soon mister." Sapnap said, making a few hermits hum. 

"There were so many other ways to word that..." Doc and Ren said. Impulse, Tango, and Zedaph all looked at each other. "Don't look at me like that!" Impulse laughed. "Dream... If we were to transfer Adminship to Callahan, they'd need to consent to it first." DreamXD said. "C-Can you ask them for me?" Dream whimpered. Drista looked at DreamXD and the older nodded, sighing as she whipped herself back to the SMP.

"I keep teaching her the correct way to do that... I blame you, Thesius Minecraft." DreamXD said. "THESIUS!?" Everyone yelled. Except Dream. He more or less whimpered what everyone else said. "My mum named me, ok? If it were up to my dad, I'd have a much stupider name." Tommy said. "WHAT! Oi, Thomas is a normal name!" Phil yelled. "First we learn Sapnap's old name was Pandas, and now that Tommy's full name is Thesius." Pearl sighs. "What's next?" Mumbo said. "George telling us how his mushrooms work, Ranboo getting their memory back, Tubbo not being obsessed with nukes, Purpled eating normal food, Me not dying..." Scar listed. 

"So the impossible?" Keralis teased. "I can survive for a long time!" Scar said. "Is he talking about 100 hours in hardcore?" Grian asked out loud. "Yes, Mister kill a vindicator!" Scar huffed. "Do you want me to lead another creeper to you again?" Grian threatened. "N-Not here please! I have TNT in my game..." Zedaph said.

Chapter Text

Callahan joined the game

"Dream! Callahan's here!" Sapnap screamed, making Dream jolt awake at the loud noise. "Great work, Watermelonhead. I just got him to sleep!" George said. "He's not a baby!" Sapnap said. "In ender dragon years, I'm still classified as a hatchling..." Dream mumbled, wrapping himself in the blankets of his bed. "There, there, Dream. Go back to sleep." George said, petting Dream's hair. "So... Can I go see Callahan?" Sapnap asked.

"Don't ask me, just go." George said, shooing Sapnap off. Sapnap clambered out of their base and ran to Bdubs' meteor crater. "Bdubs!! Uncle Bdubs! Can you go with me to escort a friend from spawn? Please?" Sapnap begged his adopted uncle. Bdubs looked at Sapnap from the inside of his new storage system. "Sure! Hold on... Lemme find my way out from here..." Bdubs said, crawling around to get out from the guts of the redstone monster. 

<Sapnap: Callahan!>

<Callahan: Sapnap!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Scar!>

<Grian: ???>

<MumboJumbo: He wanted to be included>

<Stressmonster101: Aww>

Sapnap laughed at the chat, watching Stress dote about the abundance of wholesome and chaotic moments that have occurred since he and the others dropped into their lives. Sometimes he wonders if things would've been different if they had noticed Dream's and Nightmare's switch... But, Bdubs always told Sapnap that there was a reason the past was the past. Speaking of the big-eyed wonder! 

"So, who's this friend of yours?" Bdubs asked, fluffing out redstone dust from his shirt. "Callahan! He's a selective mute and usually uses sing language to talk with us. Most of us from the SMP know ASL, so we can translate for you guys if you ever need us. If not, he'll message you or write out what he wants to say in a book or rename an item and toss it at you. You'd love him! C'mon, Uncle!" Sapnap said. 

"You know, Sap... You never told me what it was like before the SMP went belly up." Bdubs said. "W-Well... That time wasn't very memorable. We goofed around, planned out what should go where, had a few temporary members help build up the SMP, then... Something happened and chaos broke out... Maybe it all started when I burnt down Ponk's tree... I mean... It was an impulse..." Sapnap said.

"Hey, we all do some wacky things at the start of a new server. Trust me, in 3rd life, Grian brought a creeper to the group and nobody warned Scar, and it blew him up." Bdubs chuckled. "And a war broke out, huh?" Sapnap replied dryly. "Nope! Grian pledged he'd stick by Scar's side until Grian lost his first life. That took like 6 or 7 episodes for that to come true." Bdubs said. "Really?" Sapnap said. "Mhm! The blondie had more blood on his hands than all of us combined." Bdubs said.

"I doubt he beat our Techno." Sapnap said. "Oh, definitely not..." Bdubs chuckled. "Why are we not moving?" The elder asked. "I was too busy asking questions... I sorry..." Sapnap said, turning to set off in the direction of Spawn. Bdubs followed and they made it to the island of beginnings. Callahan was sitting on the man-made island, booping the axolotls who decided to show some interest in Callahan. "Callahan! You made it!" Sapnap said, making the onesie wearing mute look up at Sapnap and wave. 

"He's adorable," Bdubs said. "Auntie Stress is gonna love him!" Sapnap said, hugging Callahan. Callahan scrunched his eyebrows and made a fist with flat fingers while rubbing the tip of his thumb on his cheek then making a fist, then putting his thumb between his index and middle finger, the sticking his index and middle out and crossing them, making a fist again with his finger curling at the connection where their fingers and palm connect with his thumb resting underneath their fingers and then making another fist like the first one and bumping it twice. 

"What'd he say?" Bdubs asked. "He asked 'AUNT S-T-R-E-S-S?' in ASL. Honestly, Translating ASL on paper is much harder. It's in all caps." Sapnap said, before smiling at Callahan. "We'll show you around once you meet up with Dream ok?" Sapnap said. Callahan nodded and bounced over to Sapnap side and hugging him. 'Warm.' Callahan signed. "He's shivering, Sap..." Bdubs said.

"Are you cold?" Sapnap asked. Callahan nodded and signed the word snow and then shivered. Sapnap picked up Callahan like he was a child and looked at Bdubs. "Race ya to Stress' base!" Sapnap said, signing Hold on to Callahan. The other did and Sapnap set off his elytra with Bdubs sputtering behind him. 

~~~

After Callahan got warmed up and fed properly (Stress freaked out when she found out Callahan has been eating was beetroot stew and stray pieces of bread), they got him down to Dream. The mute practically jumped on top of Dream to wake him up. It was a destructively cute sight to see. Callahan's little ^.^ face and Dream's wide eyes made Sapnap's and George's heart swell with pride (Sapnap) and shrink in horror (George). 

"Hi Dream!!' Callahan signed, using the name sign he gave him. It was a combination of unpredictable with a 'd' handshape. "Hello to you too Callahan..." Dream said, hugging the mute and snuggling him to sleep again. Callahan tapped his forehead and signed 'XD and D-R-I-S-T-A sent me to see you. Something about A-D-M-I-N?' he signed. "Mhm... I need you to take over as Admin for the SMP..." Dream mumbled, nuzzling his head in Callahan's fuzzy onesie. 'Why? I was hoping we'd transfer everyone to here. It's quiet, vast, and there are no borders...' Callahan signed to Sapnap and George. 

"Because the risk of Sam and Quackity throwing Dream back into a box and torturing him for something useless." Sapnap said. 'They tortured Dream!?' Callahan signed. "Yep. Exdee practically blew that whistle once They were allowed to roam about the server. Techno mentioned something too." George said. "Don't forget the panic attack I had..." Dream mumbled, hugging Callahan close. 'Am I his teddy bear now?' Callahan signed. 

'Yep Nice knowing ya, Cals... But yeah... Sam, Quackity, and Dream... That's the mixture of disaster. Sam will try to kill Dream, Quackity will hunt him down, and Nightmare will say 'Oh hey! My pawns are here! Time to fuck things over!' " Sapnap said, giving Nightmare a goofy voice. "I don't sound like that!" Nightmare huffed. Callahan pet Dream's head to calm Nightmare down. 

'Can I stay here?' Callahan signed. "Sure. I'll go talk with DreamXD and see if he can transfer everyone on the SMP here..." George said. "What about Sam and Quackity?" Sapnap asked. "We'll get the hermits and Drista or Exdee to watch after them." George said. "Fine..." Sapnap said. He watched as Callahan messed with Dream's long hair. 

Chapter Text

"So, Callahan's staying?" DreamXD asked George, who nodded. "The charm of the hermits have done it again." George said. "Hmm... That means I'll have to bring Dream back to the SMP to shut it down.... And move everyone still there out before Dream shuts it down... Then there's the risk of Quackity and Sam..." DreamXD sighed. "

Why don't you bring some of us hermits there?" Etho asked. "Why are you not afraid of me?" DreamXD asked. Etho shrugged then sighed. "There's so many scary things here on Hermitcraft that you get used to them..." Etho said, picking pebbles out from his vest. "Like what?" George asked. "You've never seen Mumbo eat? Or Scar using his magic? Or the underside of Pearl's hair?" Etho asked. George shook his head and Etho chuckled. "Just watch very closely next time, ok?" Etho said. "Anyway! What was this SMP like?" Etho said, knocking George and Exdee back to reality.

"Right now? It's a snowy tundra covered in snow. With most of its members here and not anywhere on its radar, the structures can barely withstand the amount of snow, and everyone is bundled up in the... Box of shame." Exdee said. Etho tilted his head slightly then shrugged. "Well, If you'd like for any of us to join you, feel free to ask," Etho said, setting off a firework to propel himself in the air with his elytra.

"What a strange player..." Exdee said. "Seems normal to me," George said. "I must speak with Dream about this." Exdee hummed, looking at George for permission. "Why're you looking at me like that? Go." George said, not noticing Foolish's distraught expression. "WHAT THE FUCK?!" He yelled, summoning lightning to hit the sheep next to him. "Bye, George!" Exdee said, teleporting away. "Hey!" George huffed.

Exdee giggled as they appeared next to Dream, who was peacefully making a gapple cake. "Dream," Exdee said, making the blond gasp and crush the egg in his hand. "Sweet Cracker Jack...." Dream gasped, holding his chest. "What should we do to the SMP? Callahan is staying here now, and that leaves us with one option." Exdee said. "I know, I know... Have you and George gotten any ideas yet?" Dream asked. "The hermit with the headband suggested forming a team of hermits and SMP members to accompany us to the SMP." Exdee said.

"That's actually a good idea. Can you do me a favor and ask Etho, the headband hermit with the idea, to see if he could round up hermits who'd like to join us?" Dream asked. The god nodded and teleported to Etho, who was midflight when they teleported to him. "Hermit EthosLab. Dream has asked me to ask you to ask the other hermits if they would like to join us to the SMP." Exdee said, causing Etho to fly headfirst into Tango's version of the wire globe at Universal's theme park in Hollywood (Which the author lives near, but her dad is stingy and won't let them go!) with an audible 'TWANG'.

"Ow, Yeah, I can do that... Oh that's gonna bruise tomorrow..." Etho said, holding his head. Exdee apologized and helped the hermit with a command. "You could've done that the whole time?" Etho asked. "If Dream is an admin here, I can technically do this. I tend not to since there was a rule." Exdee said, teleporting back to Dream, leaving a confused Etho and a concerned Tango wondering about why Etho was sitting inside his globe.

"You good there, Etho?" Tango asked. Etho looked at Tango and blinked a little. "I have no clue. Can I use your Raid farm for a bit?" Etho said. "Sure?" Tango said, letting Etho rush over to the shared raid farm he and Impulse made.

<Etho: So, I was told Dream and XD will need to go back to their old server to shut it down...>

<Etho: Is it just me, or does anyone wanna join them to make sure they stay safe?>

<Stressmonster101: My baby dragon is going back to the place that hurt him!?>

<CaptainPuffy: Your baby dragon?>

<Falsesymmetry: I mean, you kind of lost mother privileges with Dream when you abandoned him>

<Falsesymmetry: TWICE>

<Skeppy: Damn, she ran you over and backed up on you, Puffy.>

<Badboyhalo: LANGUAGE!>

<Xisumavoid: Watch the words>

<Sapnap: Skeppy, There's a minimal swearing rule here>

<Skeppy: Fine... ?#%$@>

<Rendog: Much better>

<Tango: I'll come along if youre askin>

<ImpulseSV: Shouldn't we talk about this in Hermit Meetings?>

<Grian: Impulse... We used up our seasonal meeting already.>

<ImpulseSV: WAIT REALLY!?>

<Zedaph: You were at the rock with us, where was your mind?>

<ImpulseSV: Worrying about the kids of Boatem 2.0...>

<GoodtimeswithScar: We had a meeting?>

<Grian: SCAR>

The hermits were all buzzing every time they visited Dream. Stress was the first to put a signed paper in his hands and make him pin it up on the community bulletin board by his bakery, to which Dream tilted his head at. "To join you on your journey to that evil place." She said, making an announcement about the sign up sheet in the chat. "Are you sure, Mom? I mean, I have no idea how the remaining residents will react to seeing my name pop back up in the chat, let alone a bunch of new ones too. I don't even remember where I logged off at..." Dream reasoned with his adoptive mother. "I don't care. I want to make sure my baby dragon is safe and sound." She said. "Ok... But make sure to leave your elytra here, ok? I made the rule about the end for a reason..." Dream said.

"You never really elaborated about the rules on your server..." Stress said. "They were pretty simple from what I remember. No griefing or stealing, No fighting or causing too much trouble, and Under no circumstances were we allowed in the End. Of course, The first two were immediately broken once more players joined, but all I, Dream, could do was watch as Nightmare played the game of 'who can I mess with the most?' and got me tossed into a obsidian box with lava surrounding me." Dream said, fidgeting with his fingers again. Stress held Dream's hands and made him look at her. "No one knew what you were going through or who took your place. That isn't something to be ashamed of. Trust me. I can't speak for all us hermits, but we all have a past we wish we could change." Stress said.

Dream laughed and looked away. "I bet your past was sunshine and rainbows huh?" Dream teased. "Mmm... Nope. I only build that way because building is how I vent my frustrations." She said, making Dream look at her. "You don't think I'm strong for no reason, do you? Well, I better let you go now, hatchling. Remember, we're here for you. We'll fight tooth and nail to keep you safe." She said, getting on her tippy toes to ruffle Dream's hair.

~~~

Over the next 3 days Dream would check the sign up sheet, and choke on air or whatever he had in his mouth (food, water, honey, stew from last night's dinner) with how many hermits wanted to join. The first day, there were 7 names with Stress', the second there were 5 more, the third day 4 were added on. 

<Dream: You guys really do wanna join us huh?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Dream, you and your SMP members have shown us hermits that we're not as messed up as we seem.>

<Grian: Why did we let Scar reply to this?>

<Grian: What Scar meant is that, Hermits help Hermits out. Whether that was with a block combination or with a server shut down party>

<Geminitay: Has anyone seen my kitty, Goose?>

<Tubbo_: He's on Dream's head!>

<Dream: When'd he get there?>

<PearlescentMoon: How'd he get there?>

<Ranboo: Why is he there?>

<Rendog: I'm waiting for the inevitable>

<Sapnap: Where did he go from there?>

<BdoubleO100: No, he means 'Where'd he get there' from Scar.>

<GoodtimeswithScar: *Gasp* How rude!>

<GoodtimeswithScar: I was gonna say 'What'd get there?'>

<Sapnap: Dream, you said you'd give me gap-pie if I didn't pull a Scar...>

<Dream: What makes you think I'm not making that now?>

<Sapnap: Because you're petting Goose.>

<Dream: Bite me, Sapnap>

<Dream: Not literally, you doofus!>

Sapnap was prickled to death escaping Dream

<Tango: No!!!>

Dream smiled as he picked up the little items Sapnap carried with him. Ever since he got used to Hermitcraft and being able to die as much as he wants, Sapnap just doesn't wear armor anymore. All he wears are his clothes, his elytra, and the pair of pog sunglasses Tango made for him. He then sighed knowing what was coming next.

"Exdee." Dream called, hearing the sounds of a god's teleportation next to him. "You called?" Exdee asked. "We leave tomorrow." Dream said, shocking the god. "Are you sure, Dream?" Exdee asked. Dream nodded and took the paper off the bulliten board, handing it to Exdee. "You might wanna tell everyone on the list that... It would seem more logical for you to be the one to tell them." Dream said, forcing a smile on his lips while his mind screamed at him for even deciding to go back. 

Nightmare huffed and groaned at the thought of returning to the SMP. Exdee nodded and did as the admin told him, leaving Dream to sigh and head home. Exdee stared at the list's names and tilted their head. The list was as followed:

1. Stress
2. False
3. Grian
4. Bdubs
5. Etho
6. Tango
7. Impulse
8. Scar
9. Punz
10. Sapnap
11. Phil
12. Cleo
13. Jevin
14. Pearl
15. Doc
16. Ren

"This is a long list... I don't think Punz should be allowed back to the SMP... All I need is for that thing to wiggle back into him..." Exdee said, scratching out Punz' name and messaging Dream. 

You whisper to Dream: Am I allowed to leave others out?

Dream whispers to you: I guess? Only if you see a real reason to.

You whisper to Dream: Punz, egg, virus.

Dream whispers to you: Your choice, Exdee.

"That is not the right thing to say to me..." Exdee said, going to find everyone but Punz on the list to tell them. Punz was messaged by Exdee with the fact that he was once used as a way to spread a virus along the SMP, which was a reason to why he was not allowed to join. Which the blond replied with 'Bummer'.

Chapter Text

"MAMA!" Dream heard from his bed. The ender dragon cracked one of his eyes a little before a small body crashed onto his own. "Gah!" The blond gasped, holding the smaller one. "It me! Yogurt!" Yogurt happily said, smiling at Dream. "Hi, baby. What're you doing being awake at this time?" Dream asked, sitting up in bed to hold the younger fox securely. "I heawd you were going home... What for?" He asked, making Dream's heart melt. "Well, you remember our old home?" Dream said, making the boy nod. "Well, it's hurting mama, and without me going back to see what's wrong, it'll keep hurting me." Dream said, making Yogurt gasp. 

"Home hurting mama? Mean home..." Yogurt huffed, crossing his arms and pouting like Fundy did every time he had to redo a section of Parkour Warrior when he asked Dream on a date while he was doing that one MCC. Gods, he missed the cuddles Fundy would give, or the kisses the fox shifter loved to give Dream. "Yogurt, I need you to promise me one thing before we leave." Dream said, making the baby fox look at him in curiosity. "Yes, mama?" Yogurt asked, tilting his head. 

"I need you to promise that if something happens, you bring everyone to Xisuma, they'll keep you safe." Dream said. "You mean da helmet pewson?" Yogurt asked. "Yes, darling. The helmet person. But I need you to promise me. Promise me that you'll look after everyone and make sure they stay safe." Dream said. "I will mama!" Yogurt said. "Good. Now, go back to bed, sweetie." Dream said, placing Yogurt on the floor again. 

The artic fox climbed back onto Dream's bed and into Dream's covers, holding the other close and nuzzling their head in the crook of Dream's neck. "I stay until mama leaves... That way I get all the hugs!" Yogurt squealed, wagging his small tail a little. Dream chuckled and wrapped his arms around Yogurt and fell back to sleep.

~~~

"Dream, wake up. It's almost time to go." Dream heard Sapnap say. He cracked one eye open and growled at the fire bender, holding Yogurt close to him. "I'm stealing your kid, dammit. We have to shut down the SMP. You told Exdee to tell us we leave today." Sapnap said. "Fine... Can you at least take Yogurt to Karl?" Dream whispered, pulling the covers off to show Sapnap his predicament. 

Yogurt was clutching to Dream's white t-shirt while the boy snored away. "You might have to lose your shirt..." Sapnap laughed, motioning for the blond to get up slowly. "But it's my only white shirt..." Dream whined. Sapnap placed his hands around Yogurt to help pry him off Dream. "Mama..." Yogurt whimpered, clinging to Dream more. "Oh, you're screwed... He's not letting go." Sapnap said, letting the boy go. "Well, we can't bring him to the SMP." Dream said. They hadn't realized Fundy was standing at the door, visiting Dream.

"I'll take him." Fundy said from the doorway. "Fundy... When'd you get here?" Dream asked. "I came with Puffy and the others?" Fundy said. "No, dumbass. Here as in here, at his doorstep." Sapnap said, earning a smack to the head by Dream. "Not when a child is here! When they're asleep, they pick up on things!" Dream scolded. "Oh... That explains why Shroud always gets distracted when you mention something else." Sapnap hummed. "He learned it from Mumbo, ok? Anyway. Can you help Fundy?" Dream said, bouncing Yogurt softly. The boy was still asleep and clinging to Dream like his life depended on him. "He never seemed this peaceful with me..." Fundy said. "Maybe it was because the SMP was always unpredictable?" Sapnap tried.

"No, it was because we had to worry about you going on a killing spree with Techno." Dream said. Yogurt sneezed himself awake and squeaked. "Mama?" the fox asked, making Fundy pale a little. "Shh, sweetheart... Go back to sleep. Daddy's come by to pick you up." Dream said, bouncing the younglings again. "Pa... Papa's here too?" Yogurt yawned, making grabby hands towards Fundy. The fox took the younger one from Dream's hands and held the boy close. 

"You know... I always did wonder why you were different on and off the SMP." Fundy whispered. "Now you know." Dream said, grabbing his hoodie and axe before going to leave. Fundy stopped Dream by lightly grabbing his arm and making the taller look at him. "I... I know you want to move past this... But I'm willing to try again." Fundy said. "You know I still love you... But I'm scared Nightmare will hurt you more. For now, it's safer to be apart and share Yogurt." Dream said, hugging Fundy and placing a kiss on Yogurt's head. 

"Keep him safe for me, ok?" Dream said, cupping Fundy's face. 

~~~

Everyone gathered at spawn, yawning and groaning. "You guys wanted to join us." Dream said, stretching his arms and back while Exdee opened the portal to the SMP. "Now, I must warn you guys. It will be cold." Exdee said. "Cold!? Jevin! Drink this bucket of lava, asap!" Stress said, holding out a bucket to the slime player. "Stress, I've got one right here and I'll drink it before we leave, ok?" Jevin said. The small wonder huffed and pushed her bucket in Jevin's face more. "Jev, you're better off drinking it now before she- And there she goes." Dream said, forgetting his warning to Jevin about how Stress would force-feed it to him. "Are you ready to proceed to the SMP?" Exdee asked.

The group nodded and looked into the portal to the SMP. "Wow... It's changed..." Sapnap said. Dream took a deep breath and smiled. "The dangers of not being within the reach of a server..." Dream said, walking into the portal. The minute his foot made contact with SMP ground, the snow dissipated and the sun shone again. 

"I told you he was Elsa." Scar said. "Scar, not everything is related to Disney." Grian huffed. "Grian... This is Scar. His mind is a Disneyland park on steroids!" Tango said. "He has a point... Anyway! Into the portal, c'mon!" Impulse said. When the group got into the SMP, they were met with a sword to their face held by...

"Of course. You'd be our greeting party, Sam." Dream growled. "All's fair in war and duty." Sam said. 

Chapter Text

"Come on, move it." Sam said, gesturing for the group to follow him. "You know... Netherite doesn't look good on you, Sam." Sapnap said. "Shut it, traitor." Sam said. "I'm sorry, but what's going on?" Stress asked, making Sam turn around and point his sword at her. "Listen here. Because of Dream, this server went to hell!" Sam said.

"W-well, maybe there was a reason none of you picked up on?" Grian tried. "Oh yeah? Like what?" Sam sarcastically said. "He was possessed?" Doc hissed, causing Sam to hiss back. "Creepers, gotta love them. Right?" Ren joked, making Sam glare at the werewolf. "Holy shit! It's fucking sunny out here now! Yo, Niki! Come look outside!" The group heard, looking towards the prison. They all saw a brunette dude in a sonic onesie jumping around. 

"Connor... I've told you before the sun's never gonna... Be out." A girl with pink hair said, covering her eyes to shield them from the sunlight. "Well, it's out! And I'm gonna tell everyone else!" Connor said. Niki nodded and looked around now that her eyes had adjusted to the light. When she locked eyes with the group she smiled and ran over. "Grian! Oh my goodness! Sam, put your sword away, you himbo!" Niki huffed, smacking the creeper.

"Niki. These are intruders, and an escaped prisoner." Sam said. "Sam... You don't need to be a warden 24/7. We've been in a constant winter. Let us enjoy this." Niki said, going to hug Grian. "How have you been?" She asked. Grian shrugged and sighed. "As good as one can be when their server's moon commits suicide." Grian said. "What? Oh my gosh, are you guys ok?" Niki asked. "Yeah. Dream helped us make it off the server before the moon caught up." Grian said, making Niki back up and look at Dream. 

"Him?" She asked, jutting her thumb towards the green-eyed blond who had a sword to his throat still. "Mhm." Grian said. "You do realize he's abused his powers as an admin, right?" She asked. Stress growled and her patience broke. "That isn't true at all! He wasn't even conscious for most of the time he was with you guys! You all saw his body being possessed, being a vessel for a monster and none of you noticed!" She said, making the boys and Pearl and False hold her close, even Dream ignored the blade to his throat to hug his momma. 

"It's ok, mama... They didn't know. Don't get too worked up over it, ok? We're here for a reason, ok?" Dream said, making Sam roll his eyes. "Don't fall for his lovely act. He'll turn on you in a minute." Sam said. Dream sighed. "Just show them." Phil said. "You guys promise to reel me back?" Dream asked. "Dream. I will personally set you on fire to knock that troublemaking brat off the control stick." Sapnap said. 

"What're you talking about?" Niki asked. "Just me... Nightmare. You know me. Power hungry tyrant." Nightmare said, looking at Dream's nails. "Dream really needs to clip these... How does he do anything with these?" Nightmare asked. "Why ask us? He knows." Sapnap laughed, glancing at Sam's face. "You good Sam?" Sapnap asked. "I'm fine." He said dryly. "He ain't fine. Needs more work." Grian said.

"Is Tailor Grian rearing his face again?" Ren teased. "Oh shush." Grian huffed. "Anyway! What brings you guys to here, or in some cases, back?" Niki asked. "The server is dying. The longer this place stays intact, the more damage it causes to Dream and unfortunately myself included." Nightmare hummed. "Good." Sam huffed, earning a smack from Niki. "Let your hate go. You don't see me trying to kill Wilbur now do you?" She said. "You tried to drop an anvil on him, push him in lava, outright strangle him for his food. Niki, you are exactly like me." Sam said. "At least I didn't cut off the arm of my best friend who took a bunch of expired key cards." She said.

Dream shook his head. "I'm sorry, Sam did what to who?" Dream said. "You'll have to ask Ponk for more information," Niki said. "That explains why he was missing an arm..." Grian hummed. "Listen. We need to get whoever is left here and get to somewhere safe." Dream said. "What for?" Niki asked, tilting her head as Connor and the rest of the residents surrounded the group. "The server's dying. Did you not hear Nightmare?" Dream hummed. 

"I heard... But I had to make sure. I... I still have problems." Niki said. "I'm sorry." Dream said. "Where's your mask?" She asked. "Gone. Figured I won't need it anymore." Dream said. "Liar. He hasn't had one at all." Sapnap huffed. "You mean, what we all saw was an illusion?" Connor asked, making Dream jump out of his skin. Figuratively, not literally. That would be disgusting and disturbing. "Holy beans!" Dream gasped, clutching his chest. "Yep, this is not the Dream we knew." Connor said. "Forget that! Where's the Revive book! We've cracked your ender chest and everything, nothing!" Quackity said. "You know, there's more to life than that." Sapnap growled, glaring at his ex-fiance.

"Oh yeah? Like making a country without me, leaving me to fend for myself, not even remembering me!?" Quackity yelled. "I remembered you! I asked! I wanted to include you! Karl wanted to include you but didn't for some reason! Despite his deteriorating memory, he still loved you! You pushed us away. You made us leave you behind. We tried and wanted to make our relationship last. But then... Then it fell apart." Sapnap said before he sighed and played with the rings around his neck. 

"I hold onto these, hoping you go back to your old self. To prancing around in nothing but your shorts, to annoying Bad and Skeppy, to openly flirting with whatever moves... But I'm not sure if I should hope for those days anymore..." Sapnap sighed. "You can all start anew if you like. I'm sure our admin can wipe your memories of this place." Pearl said, leaving out the fact that Dream, herself, and Grian can mess with people's memories too. Grian gave her a look that she ignored. 

Apparently more people joined while Dream was gone! There was a girl named Aimsey, a boy named Eryn, a frog hat-wearing goofball named Boomer, an old friend of Karl's, Tina, a fox who looked almost like Fundy, but saner. Who the hell is Micheal? At least Dream knows Tina... Who allowed these guys- "I'm gonna kill that dumbass." Dream aid, slipping past the group to find his brother. "Who?" Tina asked, speedwalking with the group while Dream stomped to what seemed like a regular mountain. Dream kicked the stone-colored door open and took a deep breath in. 

"TOM! I SWEAR TO OUR BIG BROTHER-" He started, slamming the door on everyone. "So... Has anyone here tried Dream's baking?" Grian started. "Dream can bake?" Niki asked. "I thought you guys knew that? Didn't he tell you guys?" Pearl and False asked, Pearl asked the first part, False just added on. "Uh, not really? Most of the time we were around him, he looked conflicted or like he was calculating something." Eret hummed, looking at their nails while they flinched at the loud thump on the other side of the wall.

"DreamXD, are you going to interfere with this?" Niki asked, looking at the god. "If you haven't gathered, Dream is the scariest of us 4- Well 5 if you count Dream's girl self." Exdee said. "Why does he speak so freely now?" Hbomb asked. "I have spent too much time with the hermits of hermitcraft." Exdee hummed. "Ah..." The SMP members said just as they heard another thump.

"Exdee, Please?" Grian said, making the god sighed and phase through the wall. The sight they were greeted to was a normal one. Dream and tom were choking each other with the sheet of Tom's bed. "Alright you two. No more Black widow stuff." Exdee said. "He- Started it." Tom wheezed out, pulling his side tighter. "B-Bull!" Dream huffed, doing the same. For the first time, Exdee took their mask off and glared at their brothers.

"I swear, mother should've named you two anything else besides Dream and Tom. Thomas, you should know better than engaging in a fight with Dream. And Dream... You're in recovery. What if you seriously hurt your brother?" Exdee scolded them. The two let go of the sheet, which let go of them. "Now, why fight?" Exdee said. "He told me we have to shut this place down! Where will everyone left go!?" Tom huffed. "You didn't let me finish, gumhead!" Dream huffed.

"Gumhead? Is that the best insult you've got for me? I remember your last one was ⍀⍜⏃⎅☍⟟⌰⌰." Tom said. "You wanna live in a place where insults are frowned upon?" Dream countered. "Enough you two." Exdee said. "Now, Thomas. We need you to help us move everyone off the SMP while Dream and I get to the heart and put the SMP to rest." Exdee said. "Can we take any pets or mobs we're attached to?" Tom asked. "Yes. Although, I will need you to trek to the tundra and get Steve the polar bear." Dream said, hugging Tom as an apology.

"Sure." Tom sniffled. This is gonna be rough.

Chapter Text

^ It says:

WHT characters

Dsmp characters:

Dream
Sap
Gogy
Tommy Tubbo
Ranboo
Phil
Techno Purpled
XD
Bad
Hannah
Ponk
Foolish Puffy
Punz
Skeppy
Fundy Ant
Sam Nook
Ghostbur
Karl
Callahan

Hermitcraft peeps:
Grian
Cleo
Jevin

^ It says:

Iskall
Impulse
Zedaph
Scar
Mumbo
Pearl
Gem
False
Stress
Bdubs
Cub
Doc
Hypno
Wels
Etho
Ren
Joe
Tango
TFC
Beef
XB
Xisuma
Keralis

^ It says:

Who is not on yet:

Tina
Niki
Boomer
Eryn
Connor
Eret
NotDream123/Tom
Hbomb
Micheal
Seapeekay
Aimsey
Jack

Chapter Text

"Why're you guys still with me?" Tom huffed, stomping his way to Technoblade's cabin. "Because, believe it or not, the main SMP is on the outskirts of the SMP's heart." Dream hummed. "Technoblade's cabin and Philza's cabin are directly on top of the heart. Which was a risk Dream took." Exdee said. "I think Techno just pointed in one direction and settled there once he was far enough away from everyone." Dream hummed. "I had nothing to do with it." The blond continued. 

"So, we're going to the same place then?" Tom asked. "Somewhat. You'll be above ground... We'll be below bedrock." Dream said. "Below Bedrock!? You guys know you'll die there, right?!" Tom yelled, looking at his brothers. "Only if you stray too far from the path." Exdee hummed. "I just follow Ex." Dream chuckled. 

The brothers walked silently towards Techno's old cabin. "Hey, Dream?" Tom asked, making Dream hum. "Do you still love Fundy Soot?" Tom asked. Dream stopped in his tracks while his brothers kept walking before they both turned to look at him. "I... Do... I'm still in love with him, but I also fear loving loving him. All I need is to lose control again." Dream said, shaking his head and speeding his pace to Techno's.

After a solid 40 minutes of walking through rapidly melting snow, they had made it to Techno's cabin and the heart of the SMP. Tom may have slipped two or three times, taking Dream with him a few times. Exdee laughed at their family's oddities and was thankful they had the power to levitate. "So, now what?" Tom asked. "You go get Steve, Exdee and I will shut this place down..." Dream hummed. Tom nodded and left the group, leaving his brothers to venture down below the surface.

"Dream... May I ask a question regarding you?" Exdee asked. "Go ahead?" Dream wondered, slipping the blade of hisaxe between the crack where the bedrock trapdoor resides and props it open. "After you." Dream said, letting Exdee down into the void first. He followed next and walked behind Exdee. "Are you happier with the Hermits than with the rest of the SMP?" Exdee asked. "Mmm... I am. I feel more comfortable in my own skin with them." Dream said. "And with Sapnap and George?" Exdee asked.

"After everything?" Dream retorted, stopping when Exdee stopped. "Yes, after everything." Exdee continued. "I... I don't know... Let's get this over with, ok?" Dream said, pushing his older brother towards the heart. The heart of the server was pretty basic looking. Just a white orb of light that showcased important events of its lifetime. One of the photos was of Dream talking with Nightmare, face to face. The blond stared at the photo, glaring at Nightmare's form.

The black figure with red eyes, flowing robes, and a sinfully cocky smirk made his blood boil. "I shouldn't have trusted you, Nightmare." Dream said, causing Exdee to pat his left shoulder. "Can't keep this up much longer. Your fingers are darkening." Exdee said, tapping Dream's fingertips. "You know, on Hermitcraft, they glow purple." Dream chuckled, placing his hand on the orb. 

The orb dings and whines from the touch. "I know, sweetheart... You've endured so much heartache and angst. I was the cause of it. But, we're going ot set you free, now. Ok?" Dream spoke to his SMP's heart. The orb whined more and Dream chuckled. "I'm sorry you had to be the birthplace for all of those traumatic events. But don't you worry, dear... You'll be free of your chains soon." Dream said, pushing his hands into the orb to fish out the core.

"Are you ready for this, brother dear?" Exdee warned. "My baby's in immeasurable pain. A pain that living will make worse." Dream said, looking at Exdee. "If I were in this position, you'd do the same thing as well." the boy continued, smiling and looking back at the SMP.  The void around them seemed to brighten up more as Dream began to manually shut down each part of the SMP. "Why are you choosing to do this the slow way?" Exdee asked.

"Because it gives me time to enjoy these last bits of my baby's existence. Say my goodbyes and all that." Dream hummed. "Come then. The void around us is going as we speak." Exdee said. Dream nodded and followed Exdee after he captured a tiny speck of the SMP and placed it in a diamond he found in one of the dungeons nearby.

~~~

The away party watched in awe as the SMP slowly turned to dust. Even those who stayed in Hermitcraft could see from their communicators what was happening, from Sapnap's point of view. "It's like Thanos decided to visit here..." Jack said. "No... Then you and half of us would be gone." Sam huffed, watching as his prison, his last bit of purpose, fade away. "Don't sulk, Mister. You and the duck have a lot of explaining to do." Stress said. "Says who?" Quackity growled. "Says my friend who eats people." Stress said. "Wow, why'd you have to throw Mumbo in front of the subway train, Stress?" Bdubs asked. 

"More like threw him in an industrial sized blender." Tango whispered to Impulse and Scar. Scar's snickers and Impulse's snorts begin to make Phil wonder what was wrong with every hermit. The group gave a sigh of relief when they saw Dream, Tom, and Exdee come closer with Steve and Drista in front. "Alright, Everyone in the portal. Drista, take Steve first and find Techno." Exdee said, creating a portal and moving towards Drista and Steve before the younger goddess could complain. The portal swallowed the two and Dream laughed at his sister's indistinguishable squawk before Exdee threw her in the portal.

Soon the rest of the residents went through, Sam and Quackity were a bit a pain, then the hermits, then Tom, then Dream, then Exdee. With one last look, the god sighed and waved to the SMP. "What're you doing, leaving me?!" Madam Death huffed. "C'mon Kristen. We don't have all day, bring the crows too." Exdee sighed. 

Great! More gods! Phil, you better give your wife the love she deserves.

Chapter Text

The group was rushed by the rest of the server, Gem placed her hands on Pearl's face and made sure her friend was ok before she went to check everyone else that she recognized. Which meant she avoided Niki, Tina, Jack, Sam, Eryn, H, Eret, Boomer, Connor, Tom (Which she practically took a step back and had to do a compare/contrast with Dream and Tom), Aimsey, Micheal, Seapeekay, Quackity, and Drista. She actually made sure she wiggled by them to hug and check Dream. 

"Now, Which one of these guys is Sam and Quackity?" Cub growled. "Those two." Dream, Sapnap, and Phil said. Techno simply pointed at Quackity. "Ah... Well then... To the courthouse!" Zedaph said. "When'd we get a courthouse?" Scar asked. "And why weren't we invited to build it?" Grian added on. "You guys were off the server, but we made do with your things." Tommy said. "I swear I didn't eat anything," Purpled said. 

"I'm not goin' anywhere with you shits!" Quackity yelled, earning a trident handle to the back of his head, rendering him unconscious. The SMP-ers gasped while the hermits stood there shocked. "SCAR!" Everyone yelled, looking at Scar like he had committed 39 acts of treason in five seconds. "What? His voice was hurting my ears!" Scar huffed. "I blame you for this, Grian." Mumbo said, hiding behind X while the admin sighed. "M-Me!? I blame 3rd life!" Grian huffed. 

"He wouldn't have had his screws blown loose if you hadn't lured a creeper to us if you think about it..." Cleo said with Bdubs nodding in thought. "That was a fun series... Shame Last life made us all feel like Imposters..." Tango hummed. "What's Last life?" Niki whispered to Grian. "Just a survival series we did. Nothing too bad." Grian said. "Says the player who killed most of us in the first version." Ren teased. "I blame Scar." Grian said. "I blame you. You were a terrible influence for me..." Scar said. 

"And the married couple of 3rd life rears it head again." Etho chuckles. "No. No! He's not stripping every five secon- Scar put your shirt back on!" Grian said, stopping Scar from taking his shirt off. "It's hot!" Scar huffs. "Besides, I have a tank top underneath!" The green-eyed vex whines. It was actually a manly whine, but a whine nonetheless. 

"You guys get settled in. We'll take care of Mr. Awesamdude and Mr. Quackity." Joe said, nodding at Beef and Hypno. The two grabbed Quackity's arms and legs and took him to the courthouse while Cub nudged Sam. "I should go with them." Dream said, being stopped by Stress and Cleo. "Dream. I get you'd like to see your tormentors pay for what they did, but you have to remember, to them, Nightmare was you." Cleo said.

"I know Mama Cleo... But I'd like to rub it in their faces about the turned tables." Dream chuckled, skipping after the group. "Welp! I'm gonna take a long bath in lava." Sapnap said, twisting his back and sighing at the disgusting cracks that came from that. "You bathe in lava?" Jack asked. "I can bathe in water too, but it doesn't help my muscles one bit." Sapnap groaned.

~~~

Sam and Quackity's punishment was severe in Hermitcraft terms. They had to be every member's assistant/servant. Which meant if Scar asked Sam and Quackity to fight the wither with their bare hands, they'd haveto do it, no questions asked. Which Dream abused right off the bat. "Hey, Sam, Quackity, can you guys do me a big favor and go to these coordinates and help Mumbo and Tango out with their new mingame? It involves TNT and they both need test subjects." Dream said with a hopeful and fake smile. The two groaned and did as the blond said. Dream watched them leave and smirked like he had sent them to limbo.

"You evil man..." Hypno gawked, staring at Dream. "What? Revenge is something both Nightmare and I enjoy." Dream said. "Remind me not to wrong you." Iskall said. The group of new arrivals was escorted to another chunk away from the server and were told the rules. The newest members blinked in confusion when Dream told them the End rule. 

"We weren't allowed in the End before!?" Aimsey gasped. "Yeah... I did that to protect you guys. Constant visits to the end can lead to unfortunate things..." Dream said, scratching his neck. "Like what?" Eryn hummed. "Like me, kid. You don't want a runaway entity hijacking your body for who know how long. Trust him kid, just take your problems and don't add more to them." Nightmare said, scaring the two teens. Aimsey fainted while Eryn's eyes went from scared to inspired. "Yo! I like you!" Eryn yelled. Dream shook his head and held it for a bit. 

"Gee, couldn't wait to introduce yourself, huh, Nightmare?" Dream fondly spoke. "As you guys can tell, I have a literal god using my body to hide from the others. Now, he's kind of dangerous, but compared to everyone else on the server, we rank the third most dangerous. Just keep an eye out for any signs. More so my eyes. They'll be purpleish-red." Dream said. "Got it!" The group said right as their communicators pinged. 

Awesamdude went out with a bang

Quackity blew up

<Tango: Too much TNT>

<MumboJumbo: Gott awork on those timings>

<Grian: Scar, they're taking our jobs>

GoodtimeswithScar was slain by [Subscribe to Technoblade]

<GoodtimeswithScar: Who named that spider Subcribe to Technoblade?>

<Technoblade: YOOOOOO>

<Technoblade: CLOUT>

Chapter Text

Dream hummed as the server began to feel like a home. Yogurt was running around Ravineworld with Fundy, playing hide and seek with his father, Beckerson was exploring with Sapnap and calling the fire wielder papa, Tubbo and Ranboo were having a family day with Micheal, Finnely and Foolish Jr. were off making their father's life difficult, George was making sure Exdee didn't hit Scar with lightning again, and the hermits were being their loving and kooky selves. 

"Mama! We're here! Like Papa pwomised!" Yogurt yelled, tackling Dream and hugging him. The blond was in the middle of building his mega-base when the two showed up, so the tackle made him make an 'oomp!' sound. "Oh! Yogurt! My hatchling! When did you and Papa finish your game of Hide-and-go-seek?" Dream laughed, kissing Yogurt's head and tickling the boy. Fundy watched as the two hugged and played. "We just finished, actually. Yogurt couldn't wait to see you." Fundy said. "Papa! SHHhhh." Yogurt huffed, making Dream smile. "I missed you too, Yogurt." Dream said, hugging the boy close while looking at Fundy. 

"W-What're you looking at me for?" Fundy asked. "C'mere..." Dream said, opening his arms for Fundy to join. The fox joined and hugged his son and rekindled love. "Mama! Can we go visit Gwanma Stwess today?" Yogurt asked. "Of course. That is if she isn't busy." Dream said, booping the younger's nose. "Isn't Puffy your-" Fundy started, getting cut off by Dream's finger. 

"Not anymore... Stress treats me more like a son than she ever did. Now, Let's get you to Mama Stress, hm?" Dream said, holding Yogurt to his hip while he stood up. The younger cheered and hugged Dream's neck. The two left the plains biome Dream was setting up in and began to walk towards Stress and Impulse's mega bases. Those two decided they'd share a biome together. Not to mention Stress telling Dream about the time she and Impulse swapped bases for a bit in Season 7. 

"Mama, Can I ask why you and Papa don't live together?" Yogurt sniffed. Fundy sputtered for a response, but Dream simply smiled and placed an affectionate nuzzle to Yogurt's head. "Unfortunately, Mama and Papa can't be together all the time due to our own projects getting in the way." Dream said, looking at Fundy to help back up the white lie. 

"Really Papa?" Yogurt asked, twisting in Dream's arms to look at Fundy. "Yeah, bud. I'm sorry." Fundy said. "Then can I have a sleepover with Mama tonight!?" Yogurt beamed. "Of course hatchling! But, tonight, Mama promised Uncle Sapnap that he'd spend the night with him to help Beckerson sleep..." Dream said. "I can help! Please Mama!?" Yogurt asked, using his own version of the puppy eyes. Dream likes to call them kit eyes. "Only if your father says yes." Dream said, knocking on Stress' side of the mega build he called "Mama Stress' misshapened tower of confetti"

"You can stay with Dream, Yogurt." Fundy said, earning a happy yip from Yogurt. Stress opened the gate and gasped. "Oh! If it isn't my grandbaby, Yogurt! Oh, I've missed you!" Stress yelled, plucking Yogurt from Dream's arms and hugging the young fox close while the other two adults gasped and instinctively rush to make sure Yogurt was ok. The two calmed down when Yogurt giggled and hugged Stress back. "Hi Gamma!" Yogurt chirped, smiling at Stress. 

The two let Stress run around her base with Yogurt while Fundy stayed by Dream. "Are you sure you don't want to try again?" The fox asked. Dream shook his head and smiled at Fundy. "As much as I'd love to, you know it'll be like last time. George will object, I'll go after George, he'll leave me hanging, and the cycle will repeat itself..." Dream said. "Despite the fact that you don't look at George the same again?" Fundy hummed.

"Yep. What if we tried going out a few times? To try and get my heart to sway your way." Dream suggested. "We did that." Fundy said. "Going on one date to watch Treasure Planet and eat steak and random potion does not count." Dream said. "Fine... Next weekend?" Fundy suggested. "Sure." Dream said.

Chapter Text

Awesamdude was skewered by a falling stalactite

Quackity was killed by ZombieCleo using magic

<ZombieCleo: whoops>

<Dream: Harsh>

<Tubbo_: Brutal>

<Cubfan135: Does anyone have any spare time to help me make a full course dinner?>

<Sapnap: Food?>

<Sapnap: WHEN>

<KarlJacobs: Beckerson James Jacobs-Halo>

<Dream: Ooh $%#&... That's not good when someone uses your full name>

<KarlJacobs: You give your father his communicator back or so help me, I will ground you from using your uncle's science lab>

<Sapnap: Papa Sapnap is asleep tho...>

<KarlJacobs: 1>

<KarlJacobs: 2>

<KarlJacobs: 3>

<KarlJacobs: If I get to five and Sapnap hasn't responded with pineapples, you're grounded mister.>

<KarlJacobs: 4>

<Sapnap: Why'd Beckerson hit me with an empty bucket with a post-it note in it?>

<Sapnap: It said 'Please type Pineapples in the chat b4 mom grounds me'>

<Dream: Your husband almost grounded your child.>

<Sapnap: Dam>

<Hypnotize: Language>

Karl sighed as he packed up the last bits he had to give back to XD. Seeing as there was no need for him to go back and forth in time anymore, he wouldn't need these things. Like the stopwatch. If only Karl remembered why this thing is so important to his power. (No one knew the damn thing's power, not even XD! The idiot just made it and said 'I'll give this to a mortal to figure this out.') The brunette called the god and hummed when the familiar figure materialized in front of him.

"Jacobs. You've called?" Exdee asked, nodding at the time traveler. "Hi, Exdee. Um. I was handing these things back since I don't believe there is any reason for me to go back n' forth through time." Karl said. "Ah... Yes. Would you mind if I asked you to keep these? They are useless now that the SMP is no longer around." Exdee said. "Oh... Does that mean their power is weaker or non-existent now?" Karl asked.

"Both. I am sorry for the trouble they have caused. I must apologize to your predecessor for this as well, despite them most likely not knowing or understanding what I am saying." Exdee said, nodding at Karl one last time before leaving is a twisting wisp that reminded him of Harry Potter. The brunette blinked and looked at the box in his hands. Maybe he can tell Beckerson some of these stories to help the boy sleep. Every night Sapnap and Karl try all they could to make the boy sleep without having the boy scream and thrash around from the lack of water nearby. 

It's gotten to a point where the two had asked Doc to make a special bed that would spray water on Beckerson every now and then. The brunette adjusted the box and made his way back to the shared home where Sapnap, Beckerson, and he live. The base they lived in was a cozy one? They lived in the side of a mountain where it overlooks most of the Ravinworld residents, sans Impulse and Pearl. The girl of Ravinworld wanted to live with Gem for 'bonding' purposes.

Making the climb up the stairs to their front door, the time traveler heard the distinct wails and sobs of their child and Sapnap trying to comfort the boy. With a slight nudge with his foot, the door slid open and the sight of Sapnap, drenched in water and Beckerson sobbing on the other's chest made his heart break and melt at the same time. "What happened here?" Karl fondly asked, setting the box down and closing the door, catching the attention of his baby and his husband. 

"Beckerson tripped while we were going torefill his bed and got me with the bucket of water. Just a few burns on me, but they'll look like sunburns. Beckerson thought I was going to die." Sapnap said, holding his still crying son, who kept spilling the words 'Don't die, Daddy' and 'It was an accident, Mommy.' Karl slid over and scooped up the boy. "Shh, it's ok. Daddy's ok. You're not in trouble, Sweetie. You just tripped. It's ok." Karl said, placing a loving kiss on Beckeron's head.

The boy hiccuped and sobbed into Karl's hoodie, dampening the fabric. "Shhh, dear. Mommy's got you. Wanna play with Clyde and Dale?" Karl asked, getting up and walking the fishboy to the aquarium where two axolotls were. A blue one and a pink one. The boy nodded and Karl placed him in the aquarium with the axolotls, not worrying about them attacking him. 

The boy played with the two blobs of cuteness until it was time for dinner. Which meant Karl had to yank the boy out and wash him off before feeding him kelp with rice (And that Sapnap and he could refill Beckerson's bed without another incident). Somehow, the hermits managed to engineer rice here. How? (Doc and Ren being mad scientists that's how) After that, it was bedtime for Beckerson, and the boy was not sleeping without a story. Sapnap handed that off to Karl, which the taller of the two playfully rolled his eyes to.

Now here they were, with Karl next to Beckerson while the boy's bed sprayed a soft mist on him. "What kind of story are you feeling tonight, baby?" Karl asked, fixing his baby's hair. "Cowboys!" Beckerson said. "Hm... Let's see. Oh! I've got one! Ready?" Karl said, watching Beckerson nod. "Here goes." Karl said, beginning the story.

You already know of the tales of the SMP, the story he was telling was the wild west one. By the time he had finished, Beckerson was out like a light, snoring softly while the mist over him continued. The brunette smiled and left his son's room, making sure the lanterns were lit and the carpets on the floor were in place so nothing could spawn and hurt Beckerson. He then left for his shared room with Sapnap.

"I missed you..." Sapnap said. Karl walked into the room and placed a sweet peck on his husband's nose. "I'm sorry you waited for so long, but we should sleep. We have that appointment with Doc and Zedaph tomorrow morning." Karl hummed. Sapnap whined but followed Karl's lead, which was brushing his teeth, changing his clothes and getting in bed. 

And yes. Sapnap is like a walking heater.

Chapter Text

Beckerson's loud cries and sobs could be heard all over the server. The poor boy had to get his immunity shots from Doc and Zed so he could freely swim around the server, but the boy was not having it. It was heartbreaking for Sapnap mostly, with the younger bawling his eyes out on Karl's shoulder while his baby boy's cries for him grew louder. Karl was any better... The tallest was busy snifflingand hugging Sapnap while their baby was crying.

It got to the point where Karl had to call Dream, George, and Bdubs for help. Dream and George were sent in to help calm Beckerson while Bdubs pried Sapnap off Karl and held the boy close while he sobbed about Beckerson. How is Bdubs a better dad than Bad? Simple... No Eggie... Bdubs hummed and rocked Sapnap, beckoning Karl to join in the hug. While he did that, Beckerson had quieted down and all the three heard was George and Dream promising the boy that they'd take him out with them to go on adventures. 

"He's all done, Sapnap and Karl." Doc said, holding Beckerson while the boy wiped his eyes and sniffled. "Ma-Mama..." Beckerson sniffled, making grabby hands towards Karl. The tallest scooped the boy up and kissed the baby's face while Dream and George smiled. "Now I have to go home and get Yogurt for his appointment...Wish me luck." Dream told George, patting the brit's back. 

"Oh, hey... Um... Exdee has been adamant on us getting a 'child'... Got any suggestions which mobs would be easy to take care of?" George said. "Well, once they grow attached to you too, they'll begin to mature into players. Like Beckerson and Yogurt. But be careful, George... Once they become attached, you will be called Mama or Papa. And with your luck, you'll be joining me in the mommy brigade." Dream said, elbowing George softly.

"Just find the mob you feel closest to. Ok?" Dream said, hugging George. The smaller wiggled out of the hug and grimaced at the hug. "Ew, now I have Dream germs all over me..." The other said,wiping themselves down. Beckerson giggled at them and said: "Uncle Dream and Uncle Gogy are at it again!" 

This made the adults smile at the boy. "We'll get going, now guys. Be good, Beckerson!" Dream said, waving to the group before he left to go get Yogurt ready for his immunity shots. Prime this is going to be painful. Beckerson waved to them while he was taken back home. "My baby boy is growing up... I'm gonna miss my little Beckerson..." Sapnap said, holding Beckerson close. "Papa! I still small!" The fishboy giggled.

~~~

"Mamaaaaaa!" Yogurt yelled, running into Dream's legs to hide from Fundy once the boy got up the rope ladder to their hanging terraium of a base. "Fundy... What did you do?" Dream asked, placing his hands on his hips. "All I did was tell him to get ready for his S-H-O-T-S. I even spelled the word out!" Fundy said. "Dummy, Yogurt can spell." Dream said, picking the baby fox and kissing the boy's red nose. "Yogy... My Kit... You have to get these. If you don't, you won't be able to play with Shroud or Micheal or anyone for that matter. You don't wanna be stuck up here, do you?" Dream said, bouncing the boy on his hip.

"B-But... They hurt..." Yogurt said. "I'll be right next to you, dear. Your cousin, Beckerson got his. Don't you wanna be as strong as Beckerson and Uncle Sapnap?" Dream said, earning a nod from the boy. "Now, let's go get those shots, hm?" Dream said, walking to the bubble elevator that was made so they didn't fall to their deaths leaving their home.

Dream walked Yogurt to Doc's office and greeted Zedaph. "Hi guys! I'm back." Dream said, kissing Yogurt's forehead. "And I've got Yogurt with me!" He finished, smiling when Yogurt made a little 'Rawr' sound. "I hope he's ready." Zed said. "C-Can Mama stay with me?" Yogurt asked, hiding in Dream's neck. "Of course he can." Zedaph said.

The shots were heartbreaking for Dream. Yogurt's little flinches and yelps made the blond nuzzle the boy's face and hair to calm him. "Are we getting ice cream after this?" Yogurt sniffled. "Yes, baby. We'll get ice cream and cake if you'd like. You're doing so well, dear." Dream said, hugging Yogurt close as he saw the last vaccine. How many shots do they need for water sickness, hunger, saturation, and strength!? 

Dream still remembers the meeting X brought up about how with a new server and update, there are new threats out there that the children are not suited for. Which prompted the 'parents' of the server to crowd Doc and Zed to find a way to protect them. Which is this...

wow....

~~~

<Xisumavoid: Parents, how are you doing today?>

<Dream: Yogurt is great?>

<Dream: His arm is hurting a little, but we'll keep an eye on it. Right Fundy?>

<itsFundy: Yep>

<Sapnap: Cue the nervous sweating>

<KarlJacobs: My heart is broken and Beckerson is healing it>

<CaptainPuffy: I haven't seen Michelle...>

<Falsesymmetry: She's mine now>

<Tommyinnit: Shroud won't let go of my head>

<Tubbo_: Micheal is asleep...>

<Ranboo: My hand still hurts...>

<Docm77: I hope everyone is ok.>

<Zedaph: My heart broke when we had to vaccinate those kiddos.>

<Sapnap: This Beckerson.>

<Sapnap: I hurt>

<Dream: Badly!?>

<Sapnap: no>

<Sapnap: my arm stings...>

<Sapnap: :(>

Dream sighed as he talked with Beckerson. "Becks is a drama queen huh? Like Uncie Sappy!" Yogurt giggled over Dream's shoulder. "Don't let your cousin hear you. All we need is for Beckerson to go full on apeshit on us..." Dream said. "Mama! Wanguage!" Yogurt gasped. 

Chapter Text

Patches was uncomfortable. Not in a bad way! No no! She just didn't like the fact that someone who looked just like Dream was staring at her in her travel tube from Dream's terrarium to Ravineworld, which the blond admin often visits to escape their responsibilities. Back to the now, the blue axolotl blinked at the other while she frantically tried to hide from them. 

She even squeaked angrily at them to go away while trying to shoo them away with her fin. They only waved at her. What's an axolotl have to do for privacy!? Why is their lips moving? What're they saying!? It's not 'food', 'Patches', or 'Lovies'! Why are they reaching into her tube!? Oi! Patches squeaks as she tries to hide from they reached for her.

Great. Now she's being held like she's a giant hamster. She lets out a disappointed pout that the other aw's at. "Don't worry, Patches. I know how much you long to be like Dream... Much like I do." They said, cradling her close. They don't even sound the same! Patches sighed as she was held.

~~~

Exdee held Patches close like she's the child George would never let them have. "I'm sorry, Patches... For annoying you. As a gift for dealing with me..." Exdee said, holding Patches like the monkey in the Lion king held Simba, but facing towards them. "The ability to control your form. Unfortunately, I am not as connected to this server as my last one, which has limited your forms slightly..." Exdee told the axolotl, who blinked at them like they were a worm. 

"You'll see soon, Dear." Exdee said, placing the axolotl on the stone floor and walked away. Patches went to squeak for them to put her back in her tube, but all that left her mouth was 'Bah!'. Now that freaked the axolotl! The little one turned around and looked at herself in the reflection of her glass tube.

She had green eyes, pale skin with splotches of blue on her face, blue hair, and a very small frame. The little axolotl girl pat at her face while she tried to wrap her mind over what was happening. "Eh!? Ahh... Nooo..." She sniffled, patting her face again. "Uh..." She heard, looking to her left to see Scar. Panicking, she got up to her feet and ran towards the waterfall near the terrarium while Scar yelled for her to stop.

Thankfully she was able to run through the waterfall and fall into her tube, turning back into her old body. Once Scar got to her hiding spot, Patches acted like nothing happened, swimming towards the bubble elevator to help her get into the glass bubble in the sky. When she waddled out into the terrarium, she slowly crawled to Dream's communicator (Which the blond admin had taken off for some reason... You guys can decide what) and looked over the messages that came though.

<GoodtimeswithScar: Is anyone missing a blonde and green-eyed kid?>

<Grian: Not me>

<Falsesymmetry: Michelle isn't really blonde?>

<KarlJacobs: Beckerson is with me with Sap>

<Sapnap: I got a clownfish!>

<Georgenotfound: That sounds oddly like Dream...>

<itsFundy: No, can't be him.>

<Georgenotfound: How do you know>

<itsFundy: No reason you should know, wedding crasher>

<Sapnap: *aggressive air horn sounds*>

<Geminitay: Fundy>

<Geminitay: You wanna talk about something?>

<Tommyinnit: Nah, big man over there is still salty over the fact that he and Dream almost got married and he objected>

<Rendog: TMI>

Patches huffed as she sat there, reading the messages. She was then picked up and cooed at by Dream. "Patchie... What're you doing out of your pond?" He asked. The axolotl nuzzled Dream and fell asleep.

Dream hummed Patches to sleep while he slowly laid her in a bucket to transport her back to her pond. It was weird being able to leave his house in a big shirt and shorts on. He was so used to black cargo pants. The boy let Patches back in her pond and handed her a worm as a snack. "Now, no more running off without water nearby, young lady." Dream scolded.

Patches huffed and sat in her pond, playing with the toys and mini cave Yogurt and Dream made for her. She may have a new power, but with her current experience, she likes being underwater... She may wander around as her human self from time to time... But that's to taste Dream's pies. They're her new favorite food next to shrimp.

Chapter Text

<Tubbo_: Sam>

<Tubbo_: QUACKITY>

<Awesamdude: Yes>

<Quackity: Currently shoveling shit for someone, what?>

<Geminitay: WATCH YOU GOBSMACKING MOUTH YOU LOATHSOME CRETON!>

<PearlescentMoon: O-o>

<Grian: Pearl, go get your wife>

<PearlescentMoon: Not my wife>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Wife>

<Tubbo_: anywho meet me at 293, 18, 309 soon!>

<Tubbo_: ;)>

<Awesamdude: OK?>

Tubbo smiled deviously while he polished a worryingly sharp blade. You may be wondering: What is Tubbo about to do? Does the word Karma ring a bell? It does for Tubbo! For context, let's rewind a bit.

~~~

"Dream! Big bro! Bringer of Solace! What is up for you, huh?" Tubbo rambled, tackling the other. Ever since they were dropped here, Tubbo doesn't see Dream as the big bad tyrant from before. Instead, he saw Dream as one of them. A person trying to recover from traumatic events and be their better self. "At the moment? This sand block I'm holding above our heads so we don't die. What brings you to my humble area of trying not to die?" Dream said.

"I wanted to apologize for ignoring your calls for help back on the SMP! I just thought you were a two-faced bastard!" Tubbo said. "That was too cheery... Anyway, it's ok. I deserved all that came my way afterwards." Dream said, nodding for Tubbo to release him so he can set the sand down. "What do you mean?" Tubbo asked, bounding back to Dream's side.

The blond groaned as he looked in his dye box and saw that the white dye needed to make his glass white was running low. "Nothing that should worry you, Tubs." Dream said, closing the box and turning to go buy some dye from Ren or Stress. Tubbo, being his natural self, didn't let this go. "Tell meeee!" Tubbo whined, climbing up Dream's arm to shake his shoulder. 

"Tubbo. You won't like what I went through. Drop it." Dream warned, looking at the small ram. "No!" Tubbo huffed, making Dream sigh. "They tortured me. They gave me scars and burns that still hurt. They put me through so much that I debated about ending it all. Tubbo, I still have the scar that was produced to get us here. It still hurts to look at myself and see where the scars should be and not seeing them." Dream said, using his free hand to pet Tubbo's hair. 

"It was the right thing to do. To teach me to not be as gullible. And it did its job." Dream hummed, ignoring Tubbo's look of disbelief and murderous intent. "who?" The other grumbled, squinting at Dream. "None of your concern, Tubs." Dream said, shooing the boy away. "Now go make sure Micheal and Ranboo haven't broken into Ren's base to mess with the pendulum he made." Dream said, patting Tubbo's head.

~~~

To say Tubbo held grudges well was a questionable statement. He's held his fair share of ill feelings towards some people *cough* Etho *cough* but grudges? He barely had them. But when he did, someone was dying. Like the chicken who ate his seeds... In his words: The chicken asked for it. Back to Tubbo! Anywho, he made his way to the surface where he patiently waited for the duo.

Now, he himself is to blame for Dream's suffering... In fact, everyone from the SMP sans a few members was responsible for Dream's condition. He feels terrible knowing that he assumed Dream was the way he was normally. What a culture shock he had when he saw Dream in Mcc's! Tubbo even messaged Karl and Sapnap about his plan, but the two couldn't leave Beckerson with another babysitter. The last time, Beckerson drew all over Xisuma's helmet.

The boy saw the two guests of honor and smiled. "Hello! Come come!" Tubbo said. The two did so and once they got to Tubbo's little bunker of torment... The boy pulled a lever that dropped them into their own cells. "Welcome, dear guests to hell!" Tubbo cheerily said, closing the lid while Sam and Quackity screamed at him. 

~~~

"Now... Who to target first... The Warden for NEGLECTING his duties and KILLING my platonic husband... Or the Duck, who broke two people's hearts... Hmm" Tubbo started. "Tubbo! We made it! Beckerson is with Dream and the blond was so happy to spend time with him! So, what's going on?" Karl said. "Can't decide who to torture first..." Tubbo huffed. "Dibs on Boom-boom." Sapnap said, grabbing the shears and precision knife. "Not without me!" Karl huffed, leaving Tubbo with Big man Quack himself.

He's in for a load of trouble. "Hello there!" Tubbo cheered, ignoring Sam's screams. What? They had a bone to pick with Sam! He hurt Beckerson's feelings by calling the baby boy a glitch. Quackity yelled a few profanites, which Tubbo simply marked up for a much more gruesome punishment... "What to start with first... Your other eye? Your tongue? Your heart? No... I know what'll make you bleed far more after this." Tubbo said.

"Fucking sadistic little shit! You owe your life to me!" Quackity yelled. "New server, new rules!" Tubbo said, punching the other before pulling him up by his collar. "Think of this as my welcome gift to Hermitcraft. Everyone here seems nice, but when you think about it, what darkness do we all hold? You're about to meet mine~" Tubbo said.

~~~

<Dream: Has anyone seen Quackity or Sam?>

<Sapnap: nope>

<KarlJacobs: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ >

<Stressmonster101: I last saw Quackity shovelling my snow covered bee box>

<Tubbo_: I only saw them at the coordinates I gave them and then sent them on their way.>

<Ranboo: Have you heard of Jesus Christ?>

<JacManifold: Christ compels evil!>

<Dream: ?>

Tubbo placed his communicator down and turned back to a heaving Quackity. Tubbo had already cut bits of flesh off of him, destroyed his other eye (don't worry, he'll go back to normal when he dies), and carved a small declaration into his stomach. "And now, for the final blow~ Oh this is going to be amazing! Then I'll take your wings~!" Tubbo said. 

Very creepypasta-y here, huh?

Quackitywas slain by Tubbo_ 

<Dream: TUBBO>

<Tubbo_: HE WAS TAKING MY BEEDUBS!>

<BdoubleO100: He named another bee after me!>

<Rendog: Now we need another squid incident!>

<Georgenotfound: Which one?>

<Georgenotfound: Dream's or Tubbo's?>

<Sapnap: Dream had a squid incident!?>

<Dream: Patches saved me, don't worry>

Chapter Text

To help us all calm down from the last chapter of eugh... I wanna announce somethings!

First! I made an official Instagram for my Ao3, it's 5ome.whatofal0ser. There's nothing there yet, but we're getting there! It's fairly new. Anyway, you guys can contact me there or on discord, which I made a server for (guy use it, pls. the link never expires), so feel free to hang out in discord or on insta and yeah!

Secondly! I may or may not be going back to college (ugh) and getting a job so my mother can stfu about me not doing anything. We kind of can't since there's a serial killer running rampant in California (where I live).

Third! Uh... Wait, there isn't a third... Maybe there is? I need to go to the doctor for a physical? My body is like 'You ain't left your home in years. Fucking touch grass.' and then I do, it hurt! So yee...

That's it... Yeah! 

Also, if you haven't seen the dicord here it is:

https://discord.gg/tb6uzjZa

Chapter Text

Scar stared at his theory wall intensely. Poor Grian came to borrow steal some iron from Scar, but the first thing he saw was the disabled vex glaring at his wall with the mystery child and red thread he assumed Scar asked Pearl or Gem to help make. "Scar? You good there?" Grian asked, causing the other to flop out of his chair. Grian helped him up and with his leg braces while Scar stared at the wall more. 

"Scar. Scar. Scar. SCAR? SCAR GOODTIMES!" Grian yelled, shaking the other. "Wha? Let me theorize in my head in peace, Grian!" Scar whined. Grian rolled the abyss that he called eyes. "C'mon... Have you even fed Jellie? Let alone let her exercise more?" Grian asked. "No..." Scar said. Grian pulled him out from his chair after he made sure the braces were working and charged (Scar tended to forget to charge these, thankfully Dream gave him Foolish, who is just as forgetful), getting Jellie leashed, and walked Scar and Jellie out from Scar's Deathstar of a base. 

How had Jellie or Scar not have died while traversing the place!? Thank god Scar had the foresight to make the way up and down easy... Well, winding stairs was one way. Another was a boat ride up and down! The three walked all over the server, even stopping by the bakery and Phil's pet supplies to help feed themselves and Jellie. Poor Phil... He thought Grian had married Scar by now. Given their history and how everyone here calls them the married couple. Bdubs and Etho come second in that category.

The walk around the server helped Scar clear his mind slightly. He didn't inspect every member of the server with Blonde hair or Green eyes, or blue associated to them like before. "Hey! Look! It's Dream!" Grian said, noticing how Jellie yeowled for Dream. The blond turned from the... Was he trying to make a cactus farm? 

"Oh hi guys! What's up?" Dream yelled, dropping his things and running over. "Dream! Oh Come on!" Foolish yelled as he was almost crushed by falling sand. "Be right back!" Dream yelled, hugging the two and Jellie. Scar stared at Dream and then at Patches, who was in a bucket hanging off of Dream's right arm. "Are you missing a child by any chance?" Scar asked Dream. "No? I mean, the only child I technically have is Yogurt, but Patches is like my second child. Why?" Dream asked. "He found a kid who looked like you running around Ravineworld." Grian said. "I'll have a talk with Exdee and Tom about it." Dream said.

"Like a true admin." Grian said, poking Dream's head. "You hear that Nightmare? Be more passive than chaotic." He said. "How is Grian smaller than you? How is it he has Mom privileges on you!?" Scar yelled. "You do realize you're talking to the Mother Spore, right?" Grian asked. "You guys have to tell me more about that one day." Dream said. Patches gurgled at Scar, who made an offended noise. "Why is she mad at me!?" Scarwailed, picking up Jellie to wipe his tears.

Poor Jellie... That cat is the most behaved, and her bipedal thingamabob is an emotional wreck. He's used her as a pillow, heater, teddy bear, therapist, tear catcher, pep talker, model, and made her president of his Deathstar! At leat Grian makes Gellie be Tommy's emotional support cat... Which she's terrible at. Poor Tommy has to make sure she's even willing to get out of his bed so he can sleep.

Cats are weird... Thankfully Patches is an axolotl in this story! (We all know she'd be the best girl next to Jellie. It'd be battle for best kitty)

~~~

Dream had finished with Foolish a few minutes after the Scarian visit. Foolish was covered in sand by the time they had finished. Dream saw it as payback for being the family favorite, but we all know Dream and Nightmare have this underlying hatred for the other. Why does Nightmare hate Foolish? Sure he's Exdee's only follower who would rather argue with him, or the fact that Foolish could change his height from 6'3" to friggin 23'!  23 Feet! Who needs to be that tall!?

Dream and Patches walked back to their home, Patches squeaking as she was jostled about in her bucket. Dream wasn't the steadiest of walkers. He liked to skip and hop about as he walked. ADHD and short attention span plagues him, sue him. A sharp squeak from Patches flopping out of her bucket alerted Dream to rush to her, but he didn't expect to see a small 4-year-old sitting where Patches was with a cod in her mouth. Where'd she get a codfish?

"Patchie?" Dream asked, getting the girl's attention. "Aba!" She squealed, holding her arms out for him to pick her up. Dream did so and smiled as the small one nuzzled his face. "I'm gonna kill Exdee." Dream said, taking Patches to their home while the newly made shifter nummed away at whatever fish she could get from Dream. 

Poor Yogurt's face when he saw Patches was one of betrayal. "M-Mama?" He said, with tears in his eyes. "Oh, baby, No, This is just Patches." Dream said, placing Patches down on the floor, which she quickly rolled into her pond where she popped her small axolotl head out with a little smile. "Patchie? She like me?" Yogurt asked. "Somewhat. She prefers to switch between forms... Where as your father and you like to stay in a more human form." Dream said. "So... Patchie can choose?" Yogurt asked. "Mhm. Now, we have to keep this quiet and to ourselves. Ok? All we need is for Uncle George to catch wind and he'll be angry at us." Dream said.

"Why?" Yogurt asked. "Uncle George is being pestered by Uncle Exdee since almost everyone in our friend group has a family." Dream said. "Oh... He can take care of a lost mooshroom I found today! Marshie!! Marshie!" Yogurt yelled, catching the attention of a baby mooshroom. The small thing wobbled over to Yogurt and placed their head on his lap. "I found you a mama! You'll love him! Mama, can we go see Uncle Gogy!?" Yogurt rambled, making Dream smile.

"Of course." Dream said, looking at Patches. "Patchie, stay here, and be good. Don't go around scaring Fundy because you can, ok?" Dream said, earning a dejected puff from the other. They left the little shifter to visit George.

~~~

"George! George! Yogy found you a friend!" Dream yelled, flinging open George's front door. He did not regret a thing. He had just interrupted George and Exdee... Legit wrestling? "WHat're you two doing?" Dream asked. "I wanted to show dummy over here how Manhunts worked, and he misinterputed what I was doing!" George said. "Ah. Anyway here's a kid for you! Yogurt." Dream said, moving his leg so Yogurt and Marshal, the mooshroom's real name in player tongue, could rush in. 

Yogurt directed Marshal to George, and the smaller tackled the brit then nuzzled Exdee, happy to have a place to call home. Pillagers may have killed his mom, but he has a new mom and dad now! One even grows mushrooms like himself! "Have fun, Marshie! Bye-bye Uncie Gogy and Uncle Dee!" Yogurt giggled running back to Dream, who waved at the two and left with Yogurt. 

"Told ya to stop pestering me." George huffed.

Chapter Text

Marshal hopped on George's bed, waking the other up. Exdee didn't need a bed, but they did tend to lay next to George while the brunette slept. Just to watch them sleep. What? Exdee never understood why George loved sleep more than living. George jolted upright to hold the hopping mooshroom steady so the little one didn't hurt themselves. "Marshal, be careful here." George said, earning a lick from Marshal and a small 'moo'.

"You wanna go on a walk?" George asked, smiling when the little cow hopped up and down. "I'm gonna take that as a yes. Alright, let me get ready and we'll go out, ok?" George said, getting a lick and a nuzzle from Marshal. George smiled and got out of bed, placing the small mushroom cow on the floor before going to brush his teeth and wash up. 

Marshal may have followed George into the bathroom with an excited moo. Turns out The little cow wanted to bathe with George too. "You've only known me for a few hours, and you already got attached, huh?" George hummed, washing the little cow off. Marshal's moos and snorts were so adorable. Next time George sees Yogurt and Dream, he's going to thank them. 

After their bath, George dried off Marshal then himself before dressing himself and opening the door for him and Marshal to leave. "C'mon sweetheart." George said. Marshal clambered next to George and plonked his head on George's shin softly before mooing as his 'Go ahead Mama! I'm behind you!'

Such a sweet boy. George can't wait to see him grow up into a player like Beckerson, Yogurt, Micheal, Michelle, Shroud, Finnely, and Foolih Jr. "My baby..." George hummed, picking up Marshal to cradle young calf. They then left his humble abode, Marshal looking around wide eyed as he and George walked around the server. 

"Uncle Geowge!" George heard, turning to see Beckerson clumsily swimming to him and Marshal. The brunette set his little calf down to greet Beckerson. "Hello, Beckerson. Wanna meet someone?" George asked, beckoning Marshal over when the smaller nodded. "Meet Marshal. He's my son." George said. 

Beckerson looked at George then at Marshal, confused and replaying the previous conversation he and his parents had earlier. 

When a mommy and daddy love each other so much that the gods above decide to give them a gift, that gift tends to be a child. Like you and your friends. As mommies and daddies, its our job to make sure you guys are safe and taken care of. 

This also prompted Beckerson to ask the horrifying question "But where did I come from?" Oh the look of horror when his papa said 'Out from your mother. We had to manually please the gods.' So, when he put 2 and 2 together to make a fish, he gaped at how Marshal came to be. "YOU AND UNCIE EXIE HAD TO PLEASE THE GODS MANUALLY TOO!?" He yelled, confusing George and making Marshal snicker in his own mooshroom way.

"Huh? What did Karl and Sapnap tell you about this?" George asked Beckerson. "Tha-That a momma and dadda have to love each other enough for the gods to gift them a baby or that they have to manually show the gods that they are ready..." The younger said. "Those idiots... If you'd like to know though... Marshal is adopted. Yogurt and Uncle Dream brought him to me and Uncle Ex while we were in the middle of something." George said.

Turns out, that didn't help Beckerson, since he swam to his parents and asked what adopted meant. At least George and Marshal were free to keep going. Marshal met his first baby slime, first butterfly (he ate it, despite George's panicked screams for him to spit it out), first server member (Grian) and had his first piece of bread! 

To say George felt like a proud mama was an understatement. Who would've thought Georgenotfound could actually love? Everyone. He just stubborn in showing it.

Chapter Text

Sapnap hummed as he messed with the candles on the dining room table. He usually didn't do this often, but he had to mess with fire every now and then! But what startled the boy was a small knock and sneeze at his door. "Huh? Sapnap wondered, going to answer the door. And there stood a small boy covered in slime, sniffling, and rubbing his eyes. "Hi?" Sapnap asked, startling the boy. "Uh... Tapmap?" They said, blinking at Sapnap.

"Kotópoulo?" Sapnap said, picking the boy up and holding him close. The baby sneezed and slipped through Sapnap's arms and bounced on the floor beneath him. "Tapmap!" The little one huffed. "Sorry! Come here, sweetie... Let's get you washed up and put to bed." Sapnap said, walking to the bathroom and filling the cauldron with warm water so he could wash the ick from the slime baby. 

"Tapmap! Tapmap!" Slimenap giggles, making grabby hands to Sapnap. The ravenette washed the boy and carried him to get dressed in Beckerson's old clothing. The little one waved at Lasagna the fish while Sapnap slipped his shirt over his head then his shorts on. Once Sapnap was done, Slime hopped off the counter Sapnap had him on to bounce over to the fish tank to watch the fish inside. "Tapmap! Glubs!" He giggled. "Yeah! Glubs! But you need to sleep bubs." Sapnap said, picking the boy up to have him snuggle up somewhere. 

"Teep! Teep with Tapmap!" They said. "Ok... Karl's gonna kill me..." Sapnap hummed, getting into bed with Karl. "You adopted another kid, didn't you?" Karl asked with his back to Sapnap. "If it makes you feel any better, it's kotópoulo! Or Slimenap as you all call him." Sapnap huffed. Karl quickly turned around and gushed at the slime boy. "Beckerson has a baby brother!" Karl giggled.

~~~

Ponk sighed as he did his daily tasks with his only good arm. He still hates Sam for whacking it off over a bunch of defective security cards, but something inside the other made him forgive the creeper. Not a huge part of him. But a small, smidge of a part. Like maybe an atom of his being. He still wants to bash Sam's skull in with a club, but with the fact that he just got off of supervised handling of weapons, he doesn't feel like being supervised again.

That egg really gave everyone trust issues. Punz wasn't allowed anywhere near the kids, the bench trio, Purpled or any other member without a green member nearby. Bad and Skeppy weren't allowed to talk with Sapnap without Karl or Dream being present. Ant couldn't even leave his house without being checked and analyzed by the admin. And Hannah... She's not allowed to go to parties or be near red things. He's lucky he only got an easy sentence of 24/7 supervision.

<Docm77: Does anyone else here know any medical advice?>

<Ponk: What for?>

<Tommyinnit: Pok noes>

<Ranboo: Tommy, stop typing while eating!>

<Tommyinnit: >:(>

<Docm77: I have an injured wolf by my base. I'll send you the coordinates.>

<Ponk: Cool>

Ponk looked at the coordinates and grabbed his mini doctor bag before going to the location. He hoped it wasn't a trap. Last time, he did not like that trap... Hell, he didn't even know why Foolish managed to lure him and the others into a trap only for them to get killed and respawn here with massive headaches. As Ponk made it to Doc's Endor-inspired base, he flinched at how massive it was. 

"Ponk! Over here!" He heard Doc yell. He jogged his way towards Doc and saw the wolf. It's entire left shoulder was bleeding and it's leg looked completely shattered. "What happened?" Ponk asked, plopping the bag down to assess the wolf's situation. Doc stayed silent as he stared at Ponk's stump for an arm. "Doc?" Ponk said. "Where's your arm?" Doc asked. Ponk flinched then sighed. "Wolf first, my arm later." Ponk said.

The two managed to bandage the wolf's shoulder while putting the leg in a cast for it to heal, hopefully. If not, Doc suggested he could chop it off and make a new leg for the wolf! Both Ponk and the wolf looked at Doc like he had just suggested electrocuting a mouse to see how fast it ran. The answer, not fast... They usually die.

"Now... Where is your arm?" Doc asked Ponk. "It's a long story..." Ponk said. "I have all the time in the world, unless Xisuma and Dream decide it's time to start another season." Doc said. Ponk then went to explain how he lost his arm, starting from the first war and ending at how Sam used a pair of shears to whack his arm off for 11 defective security cards to a prison that was the literal definition of you become where you work. "Ah...No wonder he was douchebag. I can make you a synthetic arm. All you'll have to do is wear a silicone sleeve on your stump and slide the arm on." Doc said. "How will it move?" Ponk asked. "Depending on how you flew your muscles, it will move how you please." Doc said. 

"Really? Man, you hermits have the best tech here." Ponk said. "We're just a bunch of runaways hiding from the same enemy." Doc hummed. Maybe the hermits don't come from good backgrounds after all.

~~~

The new arm works great! How the hell did Doc manage to cram this baby out in two hours!? Man should be given a noble prize for time management! Ponk can use two arms now! He has two hands! He can grab twice as much again! Yes! Now... Off to find a certain creeper... (Go talk to Tubbo, Ponk. The readers and author know where Sam is. Deadass.)

Chapter Text

"Dream! Dream! Sam and Quackity are missing!" Foolish yelled, yelling from the ladder that led to the surface below. "And that's my concern because?" Dream started, turning from where he, Yogurt, and Patches were in the middle of a tea party. "You know, I still owe Quackity my life." Foolish huffed.

"Not my concern. Besides... You're Immortal~ Do you want me and Yogurt to get the banners and send an all-out search party for them? If they had good relationships and great first impressions with everyone here, maybe. Look, I get it. You gave your life to Quackity, but I'm not going to look for someone who tortured me over something as useless that only an admin can use! I'm honored you visited, brother dear. But please... Go away and don't mention Quackity or Sam to me ever again." Dream said, pushing the demigod to the bubble elevator. "But, Dream! Please! You're the only person who seems to be able to connect with the server. I've tried Xisuma and Grian, those two just grimaced and waved me away, Ren said he'd rather track a pillager, and that Imp person said he'd throw me down to the place he came from if I asked again!" Foolish said.

"Imp guy?" Dream asked. "Has red eyes, yellow hair, smooth voice?" Foolish said. "Oh! Tango! Yeah, we don't talk about his orgins. Now, goodbye Fooly. I hope you find someone willing to help you find those two. But once you do... I hope you know that Quacktiy and Sam aren't going back to how they used to be." Dream said. Foolish sighed and left. 

"Mama? You otay?" Yogurt asked, patting Dream's leg. The blond looked at his son and smiled, picking the little one up. "Mama's fine. He's just not great, but he's doing better now that you're here, Yogy." Dream said, earning an offended splash of pond water from Patches. "I'm sorry. And you too, Patchie." Dream said, watching Patches nod and smile at him.

~~~

Foolish sighed as he walked to Karl's and Sapnap's home. They were his last hope. Well, not really. He hadn't thought about talking with the ex-Eggies, but he'd rather avoid them like the plague. He knocked on the door and was surprised to see a small slime kid open the door with a glare that said 'I'm-gonna-smother-you-in-your-sleep'. "Slime! What did we say about opening the door to strangers?" Karl said, walking over to the kid. "It the demigod Tapmap talks about." Slime puffed, letting Karl take over while they hopped off somewhere. 

"What's up?" Karl asked. "Um... H-have you and Sap noticed Sam and Quackity are missing? Like, they both show up as active members, but when I try to find them or message them, nothing." Foolish said. "Mmm... That's odd. Why are you asking if we've noticed?" Karl asked. "Weren't you guys like... Engaged?" Foolish asked. "Once upon a blue moon, yes. But we're not anymore." Karl said. 

"Momma! I gots my hand stuck!" Karl heard from inside, smiling. "Look, Foolish. As much as I'd like to help with whatever you need help with... I have to make sure the kids don't die." He said, closing the door to help Beckerson with whatever he managed to get his hand stuck in. Foolish sighed as he walked away. Karl whispered to Sapnap about Foolish.

You whisper to Sapnap: Foolish is looking for Sam and Quackity

Sapnap whispers to you: Thankfully Tubbo has Quackity.

You whisper to Sapnap: But we have Sam. You know, as our little punching bag?

Sapnap whispers to you: As long as Foolish doesn't get suspicious. I'll be home soon, kay?

You whisper to Sapnap: Kay...

Sapnap set off with his elytra back to Karl. With Foolish looking for Quackity and Sam, this meant they'd have to hurry up with teaching Sam something. Once Sapnap got home, he made sure to take Slime and Beckerson, who was busy petting Lasagna, were fit to go stay with George. They rarely hang out with the mushie boy, and when Sapnap heard that Dream and Yogurt got George a baby mooshroom cow... Yeah... Poor Gogy is going to have his hands full.

~~~

Sam heaved as Sapnap tapped the sword on his chin. "No-no. I want you to look me in the eye while Karl here shows you how Dream felt." Sapnap hummed, removing the sword and squatting to look at Sam. Karl hummed as he slowly began to slice at Sam's limbs. Thankfully, here at hermitcraft, the more the SMP-ers die, the more their scars heal! Which means no one will know that Sam was tortured before his death! That shouldn't sound as happy as it should, but think about it!

...

Have you thought about it? 

...

That should be enough time! Where were we? Sam being tortured? Oh yeah... Uh... what to say about dis... What even happens with torture? Teeth get removed right? Or eyes? Are bits of skin removed too? What's not too graphic? Loser will leave the torture to your imagination. (They need to sleep soon and they don't feel like having more night terrors than they already do)

Awesamdude tried to swim in lava

<Sapnap: U gud?>

<KarlJacobs: You k?>

<Xisumavoid: Would you like a did you die box, courtesy of season 6 Grian and season 7 me and Impulse>

<Dream: How'd you die, dork?>

<Georgenotfound: Uncle! No being mean!>

<KarlJacobs: Beckerson give George back his communicator.>

<Georgenotfound: Yes Mommy...>

<DreamXD: Who gave George more children?>

<VintageBeef: Hold up, how did kids even get here?>

<Sapnap: He's only babysitting for me and Karl while we deal with some matters!>

<FoolishG: Has anyone seen Sam and Quackity?>

<Ponk: Have you checked Techno's area?>

<ImpulseSV: Why bother Techno?>

<Tango: He's still reeling from the fact that we have 15 other types of food here.>

<BdoubleO100: Hold up...>

<BdoubleO100: 15>

<Zedaph: Bdubs, it was in the Hermit Times...>

<BdoubleO100: I don't have that yet!>

<ZombieCleo: Subscriptions are 14 diamonds!>

Dream smiled then grimaced at the thought of what may have happened to Sam and to why Foolish was looking for him and Quackity. "Mama? Can we cuddle?" Yogurt sniffled, making more grabby hands towards Dream. The blond scooped up the little foxboy and kissed his face. "Of course my baby Kit! Patchie, can you protect us?" Dream asked, earning a squeak and nod from Patches. "I wuv Patchie!" Yogurt gigled, holding Dream's neck and kissing his face.

"Alright, baby kit. Time for cuddles. C'mon Patches! It's ok, Yogurt can know." Dream said, noticing Yogurt's yawns. "Mama... I'm teepy..." Yogurt yawned. "Oh, my baby's all tired, huh? Too much playing in the sun?" Dream gently teased his baby, earning a tired whiffle of a protest from Yogurt and Patches. Dream set Yogurt to sleep, on his chest, while Patches waddled up onto the bed and shifted into her human form, curling up next to Dream and falling asleep as well, holding Yogurt's hand as the boy slept. 

Don't tell anyone, but Dream may have gotten a few winks of sleep too.

Chapter Text

The two options: https://www.instagram.com/p/CdJ0CJCPOfy/

<Cubfan135: Help>

<Dream: What's wrong?>

<Cubfan135: Can someone come over to the shopping district and tell me which design they like best?>

<Sapnap: On my way!>

<KarlJacobs: Same! With Beckerson and Slimenap!>

<Dream: I'll come!>

<itsFundy: I guess?>

<Georgenotfound: Im colorblind>

<Dream: We know>

Cub hummed as he whispered to Tango.

You whisper to Tango: Operation Chewy-Mango is a go-go

Tango whispers to you: How do you just come up with names

Cub nodded and placed two signs that said option 1 or option 2. Option one had smooth quartz bricks with End bricks that had shroomlights sprinkled in, while option two had waxed oxidized cut copper with gilded blackstone and a sea lantern down the middle. If you asked him, he would've chosen option 2... 

Dream was the first to arrive, looking around for Cub. "Cub! What's up?" Dream asked. "I can't decide which one..." Cub said. Dream looked at the two designs and pointed at option 1. "Reminds me of home." Dream said, just as Sapnap and Karl skidded to a halt next to them. "What're we blowing up?" Sapnap asked.

"Not blowing up, unfortunately. But I need help. Which pathway design do you like best?" Cub asked. "2." Sapnap said. "Mmm... I like 1 a little more..." Karl said. "That's because you're a weirdo!" Sapnap huffed. "Hey, I like 1 too!" Dream pouted, making Karl laugh. "You two are weird! Sapnap said. George arrived later and sided with Sapnap, which left the standings at a tie so far. 

As the days went by, more people added their vote. Option 1 had 22 votes and option 2 had 27... Out of 59 adult/teen member and a few children who barley reached the age of 8, only 10 didn't care. Those 10 were: TFC, Sam Nook, Ghostbur, Beef, Joe, Hypno, Tina, Aimsey, Connor, and Niki. This was a weird type of vote. It reminded the hermits of the Button, except Scar isn't advertising the color green as the best color. 

Cub sighed as he watched the chat go off again.

<Dream: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE FIRST PATH LOOKED LIKE EGGS!?>

<Georgenotfound: THINK ABOUT IT>

<KarlJacobs: Did I eat breakfast?>

<Sapnap: Yes, Karl>

<KarlJacobs: thx, Sweetie!>

<Dream: *Throw up in 4k*>

<Dream: Ew, relationship goals>

<Georgenotfound: You're in one, dummy>

<itsFundy: Is it even a relationship if one party keeps running away from affection or even trying to figure things out?>

<Dream: I have my reasons>

<BdoubleO100: Anyone wanna start a war?>

<Sapnap: Yes>

<WilburSoot: Where do I sign up?>

<Tommyinnit: No harsh feelings?>

<Connoreatspants: LIGHTSABERS>

<Nihachu: Connor NO>

<Sapnap: HI,Slimehere. Whatiswar?>

<Stressmonster101: War is fighting. And you missed a few spaces dear.>

<Sapnap: o... Tankies Gammy!>

<Falsesymmetry: Gammy?>

<Falsesymmetry: Stress you getting every motherly name under the sun>

<Stressmonster101: What can I say? I'm a motherly figure.>

<CaptainPuffy: Duckling call me mom!>

<Dream: Hello Puffy.>

<Hannahxxrose: Welp, worthy a try>

<Callahan: Dang, Puffy's trying to fix bridges and Dream's demolishing them>

<PearlescentMoon: Gem just fell from a tree from laughing... Wat?>

Welp, so much for create a war... Maybe tomorrow it'll heat up? (Yes it will, but Loser is just lazy and slowing down the updates.)

Chapter Text

When the SMP-ers saw war, they all began to sweat profusely... When Wilbur signed up, bunkers were made. When Grian spammed 'Tickle war', everyone made a similar noise of confusion. Even the Goodtimes of the Scar made the noise! And he makes a lot of noises. So, here they were...

Each of the 59 members with a few children on each side. Who would've thought a tickle war would be the way to get a group of traumatized people to gather together? The rules were simple! All tickle warfare was to be contained in Cub's goliath of a base, every combatant must target three people of the opposing side and a combatant is considered out if the person on the opposite side has a velcro heart with your name on it. The last rule isn't talked about, but for context reasons, we'll explain... Each 'match' has a time limit of 5 minutes. If the combatants haven't obtained either of each other's hearts, they are free to have another match, but with someone new that is still in the game. Most times, chases ended before the 5 minute timer, but it was rare for both to outrun each other. 

"C'mere Sapnap!" Tommy cackled as he chased Sapnap through Cub's base, making grabby hands. Tommy chose Sapnap as his target. Yep... No clue why... Tommy's just a crackhead with a level head. "Begone, Demon!" Sapnap yelped, climbing through the vents of Cub's factory like base. Tommy, being the walking version of a graboid. He just waits until his prey give in... Or dies. Except the babs! He gives them a 30 minute head start to run.

"No! I want that last heart of yours! You already lost one to Dream and to Micheal! I want that last one!" Tommy said, grabbing the air with his hands. "Back off, Tommy." Sapnap huffed, sitting in his vent. "You have 2 minutes, Tommy and Sapnap. Impulse and Punz, 30 more seconds!" Cub yelled. "2 Minutes!? But! Cub!" Sapnap yelled, curling up into his vent when Tommy tried to jump up. "2 minutes, Sapnap. Make them count." Cub called back, sounding the bell that signalled Punz and Impulse to stop.

"PUNZ WINS THE CHASE!" Cub yelled. "Of course... Now gimme yours!" Tommy huffed. "Ever the child." Sapnap teased. "Hey! You're only 3 years older than me!" Tommy huffed. Sapnap used this to escape in a known fashion... Arson. "Take this, brat!" Sapnap said, dropping a fountain of flames down towards Tommy. "Wah! CUB! SAPNAP"S COMMITTING ARSON AGAIN!" Tommy yelled, running from Sapnap, who was also chasing Tommy whilst on fire. "Sapnap! These are not flame resistant blocks!" Cub yelled. "I'll replace what I destroy!" Sapnap yelled. "I'm gettin' too old for this..." Cub sighed. "You're not that old..." X said. "I'm roughly a century old, X... I'm too old." Cub said. "Now, now... There are many here who outrank you in age. Take TFC for example. He's almost 2000 years old. Then there's Tango, coming in with 900. You're not that old, Cub." X said, placing a hand on Cub's shoulder.

"Hey! You- Haha! Che- Cheater! Hahahaha!" Tommy's laughs and giggles meant that Sapnap had won their chase. "One sec. SAPNAP WINS THE CHASE!" Cub yelled, ringing the bell. "Whoo! Who's next!?" Sapnap laughed, helping Tommy up. "Now I have to go back and plot on who to choose next..." Tommy huffed. "Make your next target Ranboo. He may be tall and can teleport, but all you have to do is not let him know you're near." Sapnap said. "Why're you telling me this?" Tommy asked. "You seemed like you really wanted a patch... And Ranboo's got two. Now, go scheme on how to trick him into saying yes." Sapnap said, ruffling Tommy's hair. 

The younger made a noise similar to a pikmin from pikmin 3 when one of the captains pushes them. "Fine... Bitchboy..." Tommy huffed. "Hey!" Sapnap gasped. "Next chase! Wilbur vs. Mumbo!" Cub said. "Oh god... A redstone madman and a TNT fenatic... Cub, kiss your home goodbye." Sapnap said while Tommy laughed more. "Oh dear... I should put those two outside, hm?" Cub said. "You might wanna toss them in your strater base..." X said. 

"Oh boy..." Cub huffed. 

~~~

3 explosions, 4 anvils, 17 misfires on redstone contraptions.... And Cub's starter garden is now a crater with Wilbur and Mumbo bunkered down in mud trenches. Sapnap and Tommy had gone with X to speak with Dream, which meant anyone could join Cub... Those people were Foolish, False, Scar, Tango, and Beef... Scar had a whole narrator bit planned out, Tango managed to finish his crossword puzzle on ancient galactian, False widdled out a new wooden sword for Beckerson, Foolish had fallen asleep twice (the first time he woke up, Wilbur set off a TNT big enough to crash the server) and Beef...Beef was Beef. 

"Are they done yet?" False groaned. "No... They're just... Sitting..." Tango said. "Wilbur is probably writing up an anthem to yell at Mumbo and Mumbo is probably making a TNT launcher." Foolish yawned while he shifted in to a more sharky form to rest. Beef had to pour water on Foolish so he didn't die...

FoolishG suffocated

<Dream: How in the?>

<Tango: Forgot to water him, whoops!>

<Georgenotfound: You forgot to water him?>

<Sapnap: When did he become a flower>

<Cubfan135: No flower just a shark>

<Dream: HA>

<Dream: TAKE THAT FAMILY FAVORITE>

<Sapnap: And you said you weren't bitter>

<Georgenotfound: Let him revel in this>

WilburSoot blew up

Mumbojumbo blew up

<Cubfab135: It's a tie.>

<Grian: When were explosives allowed?>

<Sapnap: When Wilbur poked his head in>

<Tommyinnit: Thats what she said>

<Tubbo_: Thats what she sed>

<Ranboo: For translation- That's what she said>

<Stressmonster101: I'm glad you understand Tubbo the most, Tommy and Ranboo>

Chapter Text

"Mama! I wanna try next!" Yogurt giggled, pulling at Dream's hoodie as they watched Tubbo and Wels go at it next to Cub in the rafters on his base. "Are you sure, Kit? You'll have to carefully choose your opponent... Choose the wrong one, and you could get hurt..." Dream said, tucking one of Yogurt's stray hairs behind his human ear. "But... You and Uncle Sappy went up against each other and you were fine..." The little one sniffled. "True... But that was because Uncle Sappy and I have gone against each other many times. And we both have a few wins on our sides. I just worry that you'll get hurt worse than I do when it comes to these things." Dream hummed, kissing Yogurt's nose, which earned a giggle from the boy.

"Das why I wanted to ask cousin Beckerson... I mean... I know he likes the water better... But, Uncle Karl says he needs to walk on dry land more... And I figured, why not try here? We- We could go to Mister Cub's crater and have him fill it up with water so if Becks needs time to be in the water, he can! I-Is that ok, Mister Cub?" Yogurt said. "Only if Sapnap and Karl are ok with Beckerson. Same for you too, Dream. Ask Fundy and then tell me, ok?" Cub hummed. The three watched as Tubbo baited Wels into a trap with diamonds, but ultimately Tubbo got tickled. How? Dream and Yogurt were as confused as Tubbo when Wels turned around and tickled Tubbo. Fighter's instinct. "WELS WINS THE CHASE!" Cub yelled, earning a cheer from Yogurt. 

Dream got up and helped Yogurt up and pat the boy down to get rid of the dust on him. The little fox held onto Dream's hand while they walked home. "Mama, can... Can we talk with Uncle Sappy and Karl?" Yogurt asked. "Of course, darling. Let's get your father and we'll all be there. Ok?" Dream hummed, crouching down to look at Yogurt. Yogurt smiled brightly and hugged Dream with a happy yip. "Thank you Mama!" The younger said, placing a kiss on Dream's forehead. Dream chuckled lightly and got his communicator out.

You whisper to itsFundy: Fundy, wru

itsFundy whispers to you: at the house, why

You whisper to itsFundy: Yogy wants to do something with Beckerson, and he wanted to ask Sap and Karl

itsFundy whispers to you: What do I have to do with this

You whisper to itsFundy: He wants you to be there with us so he only has to ask once

itsFundy whispers to you: ok. hold on...

Dream and Yogurt were close to home when they saw Fundy throw himself out from the opening Dream had made once he got used to his wings. To say Dream's fallen out a few times was an understatement. That's why Sapnap made a lake underneath. Fundy flopped into the lake and resurfaces with a shake of his head. "Papa!" Yogurt yelled, waving his hands.

"Hi Yoge! So, Beckerson?" Fundy said. "Um... Mama, can you tell papa... No wanna repeat." Yogurt huffed. "Yogurt wants to have a chase with Beckerson, since Karl said that Beckerson needs to be on dry land more. But he wants to ask Sapnap and Karl if it's okay for him." Dream said. Fundy smiled and ruffled Yogurt's hair. "Alright then. Let's go."

~~~

"Of course he can! Beckerson, you've been wanting to have your own round with someone. Why not with Yogurt?" Karl said to Beckerson, whohid in his tub of water. "But... What if I dry out, mommy?" Beckerson asked. "Don't worry Becks! I'll ask Mister Cub if we can be in his new crater! That way, we can have a place full of water for you!" Yogurt said. "You promise you won't be too rough?" Beckerson asked. "Promise! And if I am, Papa Sappy can cut my tail off!" Yogurt said. 

"He's not gonna do that!" Dream yelled, glaring at Sapnap. "I didn't even agree with him and you're already plotting my murder!" Sapnap said. "You lay a hand on my baby, and I'll make sure you go to bedrock." Dream said. "Maybe you shouldn't have said that last part, Yogurt..." Beckerson said. "You're probably right... It was an impulse thing." Yogurt hummed. "Like with Uncle Impy? Always making something off of his name?" Beckerson giggled. 

(As you can tell, giggle is my favorite english word. Next to Gigamesh. Not sure why Gigamesh is also a favorite, but guess it's my own custom way of calling someone an incompetent baboon with a red and yellow polka-dotted tutu who also can't dance)

"OK. I'll do a chase with you, Yogy. Only if you promise to let me decorate your hair and tail when mommy and daddy let your mama and papa babysit me and slimey!" Beckerson said. "Deal!" Yogurt cheered. The adults were still busy arguing over if Sapnap and Dream should fight again. They decided Dream and Sapnap would decide on a later outcome.

~~~

"Ok, now Yogurt. I know you like to wrestle a lot when you're playing, but Beckerson is fragile. Not too fragile, but still. He's significantly smaller than you, so be careful." Dream said, fixing Yogurt's patch for the 70th time since Niki and Stress created it. "I know mama... You kept reminding me all of last night and this morning... I'll be careful." Yogurt said, nuzzling Dream and then Fundy. "We just worry for the both of you. We know with Sapnap being Beckerson's dad, he's probably picked up a few traits from that hothead." Fundy said. "Mmm... Like loud screeches." Dream said.

"Is Yogurt ready?" Cub asked. "Mhm! I'm ready Mister Cubfan135!" Yogurt said, saluting Cub. The other chuckled and shook his head. "Awesome, Beckerson is too. Dream, Fundy, I'll need you two to help me with arranging the arena." Cub said. "Ok. Remember. Don't let your instincts take over too much, kay?" Dream said. "Ok mama! Don't go killing Uncie Sappy now!" Yogurt said while the adults left. The boy sat on the seat in the waiting room again and played with his tail slightly.

Three minutes went by and Dream poked his head inside the room. "Ready, kit?" Dream asked, earning an eager nod from the fox. Dream smiled at the boy and beckoned him to follow. Yogurt scrambled behind Dream, smiling and poking the other just for funsies. "Ok, my kit. Past this line of purpur, your round with Beckerson will begin. Remember. Be careful and only aim for Beckerson's patch, which should also be on his left shoulder. Beckerson is fragile. So play like you play with Patches, ok?" Dream told his baby. "Ok, mama... I'll be careful while having fun... You make sure papa doesn't have a heart attack." Yogurt said, hopping up to headbutt Dream slightly. He may have learned that from Tubbo.

Sapnap and Karl were no better than Dream when they were reassuring Beckerson. The fishboy was so excited that he was vibrating. Poor Karl was shaken around by Beckerson's vibrating. "Now, Beckerson, be aware of your surroundings, and remember if you get too dry, throw yourself in water, ok?" Karl said, kissing Beckerson's forehead.

“Ok, Mommy! Now I wanna go! Please? Is the area ready yet?” Beckerson asked. “Yes, Beckerson. Yogurt is waiting by his side, and all we need to do is to get you on your end and wave at Cub as the go ahead.” Sapnap said. “Let’s do this!” Beckerson yelled, throwing his arms up and laughing. 

The Halo-Jacobs family went to their child’s line which was prismarine! You know, the one that goes from blue to purple. “We’re ready here, Cub!” Karl yelled. “Same here!” Dream yelled. “Alright, Parents! I’d like for you guys to join me up here in the sky!” Cub said. “It’s more like a cloud platform from Mario.” Fundy casually said. “You know… I should’ve made a mario themed course for them.” Cub said. “No, please no… I’d never get Dream or Yogurt out of there.” Fundy said. “What about me and Yogy?” Dream asked. “Mario.” Cub said. “MARIO!?” Sapnap yelled, face planting into the side of the platform.

“Try again, honey.” Karl chuckled, landing perfectly. Again, Sapnap’s still getting used to using an elytra regularly. Too bad MCC is so close too! “You’d think he’d be better by now…” Fundy said. “Cut him some slack… Sapnap’s got the Bdubs as his mentor which means sleep, goofs, and many other talents.” Cub chuckled. “DREAM CATCH ME!” Sapnap yelled, flying into Dream. The blond was taken to the floor with a THUD . “OW- What the?” Dream huffed.

Cub rang the bell to tell the boys to start. Yogurt ran forward before sniffing the air and nodding. “He’s doing that fox thing again.” Dream said. “He’s a fox. Of course he’s gonna do it.” Fundy hummed. “Beckie!” Yogurt yelled, causing Beckerson to scream and giggle while running away. “How’d you find me!?” Beckerson yelped, using his smaller frame to squeeze in and out small spaces. Not like Yogurt couldn’t follow him… I mean… Yogurt’s small too. 

“Should we toss in a twist?” Karl asked. “Like what?” Fundy asked. “Nah… Let em have fun…” Cub said, watching Beckerson hop in his water puddle and swim away while Yogurt followed. “So glad I taught him to swim.” Fundy said. A few more laughs and giggles and Beckerson somehow pinned Yogurt down and scratched at the fox’s ears, earning a delighted giggle. “You win, Beckie! You win!” Yogurt giggled.

Cub rang the bell and yelled: “BECKERSON HAS WON HIS FIRST CHASE!” The cheers and claps from the adults made the kids smile and hug. “Good job, Becks!” Yogurt said, giggling still. “I’d say it was all your doing, Yogy. You and I both know you would’ve won.” Beckerson said. “Well… Yeah… But I didn’t wanna hurt you in order to win.” Yogurt said.

Chapter Text

CRASH

Oh no... Not good. Not good at all... "Shit, I broke it... I broke it and he's gonna kill me." Sapnap yammered, picking up the pieces of Karl's pride and joy. His World's Best Mama mug Beckerson, Dream and him made him for mother's day. It was during the tickle war break where the kids wanted to make their motherly figures gifts. Sap and Dream even did for their own motherly figures! Dream made all the girl hermits their own pie with their favorite flavors, Sap made Bdubs, Bad, and Skeppy their own axes with custom enchantments (He managed to make an enchantment that makes explosions on impact...), Yogurt made Dream a necklace with the words 'Most amazing-est mama and Uncle in the world' Which Dream and Nightmare cried at when they got it, Micheal made Ranboo a mask with an '>:3' face, Michelle made Cleo a clay hermit crab, Finnely and Foolish Jr. made Foolish a shark ring, which the god lost like a weirdo, and Shroud knitted Tommy a new bandana! 

The little spider needed help dyeing the silk, so he asked Dream for help since he knew Sapnap was still freaked out by his 8 eyes. Slimenap puked out a slimey version of the best mom trophy in front of Sapnap, which made everyone in the group cringe and gag. Patches caught fish for Dream to cook that night as her present. Marshal just sat and watched, since he was just a mooshroom cow... Poor Marshal... Thankfully Dream was understanding and help Marshal take some mushroom stew made from his own mushrooms and some from Dream's random things shulker box. First time Dream's seen George take off his goggles and bawl his eyes out. 

Sapnap flew to Dream's and banged on the door of the cabin. "Dream! I did a bad thing!" Sapnap yelled, waking the blond up further. First Yogurt jumping on him and now Sap? "Wha? What'd you do?" Dream muttered, opening the door groggily before yawning and taking a sip of tea. "I broke Karl's Mother's day mug." Sapnap said, making Dream spit his tea out. "YOU WHAT!?" Dream yelled.

"I didn't know he had it on the table!" Sapnap yelled. "What!?" Dream said, facepalming. "Well, we can't remake it... but I think we can whip up a batch of superglue from Team ZIT's lab... Lemme get Yogurt dressed since Fundy is doing off server things..." Dream said, getting up to go get his son dressed.

By the time Yogurt was dressed in his orange t-shirt and cream-colored cargo shorts with black sneakers, Dream was exhausted. "I really shouldn't have been up till 4 am.." he yawned. "Why were up that late?" Sapnap asked. "There a thing called mob watching." Dream said, strapping Yogurt to his harness to make it easier to fly with a little one. "I still can't over how cute this is." Sapnap said, adjusting his elytra. "One day, you'll have Beckerson in this." Dream teased, making sure Yogurt was secure.

After they set off, they made it to the lab right as Impulse and Zedaph made it. "Uncle Zed! Uncle Impy!" Yogurt squealed, wiggling to signal for Dream to let him out. "Hold on, kit..." Dream chuckled, kneeling down and unclasping the harness. Yogurt scrambled to hug the two other adults. "Oh my goodness! Little Yogurt's all grown up!" Impulse gasped. "Oh, I feel so old now!" Zedaph gasped back in an over dramatic way. The two let Yogurt bound back to Dream and looked at Sapnap and the bits and pieces in his hands.

"You guys need a batch of glue huh?" Impulse asked. "Yup." Dream said, holding Yogurt's hand so he doesn't run off after a butterfly again. The two led the three in and Yogurt's gasp at all the contraptions made every adult's heart melt. Even the little one's little gasps at the hostile mobs being peaceful were adorable! "Mama? Why does Uncle Techno like to fight these guys? They're so nice!" Yogurt said. 

"W-well... The ones Uncle Techie fights aren't nice... See Riggor over there?" Dream said, pointing to the zombie who was picking mushrooms. Yogurt nodded and looked at him. "Mhm." Yogurt said. "Well... His counterparts want to... uh..." Dream stutters, trying to figure out how to word it well. "They wanna rip our faces off and eat it." Sapnap said, earning a smack to the back of the head by Impulse. "Ow! Hey..." Sapnap huffed. "what!?" Yogurt gasped, hiding in Dream's chest to hide from Riggor. "Mama! I don't wanna go outside at night anymore!" Yogurt said.

"Hey, as long as we stay inside our terraium and close the trapdoor to our waterfall, we'll be safe from them at night. Ok, my baby kit?" Dream said, petting Yogurt's hair. "And I'll gladly tear them apart if they try to hurt you, Yogurt." Nightmare swore in Dream's voice. "Ok, Uncle Nighty!" Yogurt giggled. "How did Nightmare go from scary to sweet?" Impluse whispered to Zedaph.

"Grian happened." Zedaph said, making Sap snicker. "So! Super glue time! Sapnap, we'll need 18 slimeballs, Dream, we're gonna need three bottles of honey, and Yogurt, can you do us a big favor and grab the timer?" Zedaph said to them. Each nodded and ran off to their places in the lab. "Whose gonna tell them we also need eggs?" Impulse asked. "For breakfast, right?" Zedaph asked back.

After they got back and handed the two the stickies, Impuls and Zedaph went to work, instructing Yogurt to tell them when 7 minutes hit so they could pour it in the bottle and shake it around. "Ok! Now... May we have the bits and bobs?" Impulse asked, smiling when Sapnap handed him the bits. After the two labists figured out the puzzle, the mug was as good as new! They even went through the trouble of putting a protective glaze on the mug to make sure Sapnap didn't obliterate it again.

"Oh! Dream, can you test something out for us?" Impulse asked. "Huh? Me? Why not Sap?" Dream asked. "Because Grian and Pearl informed us that Nightmare's power readings are dangerously high with how unused they are. So... We were hoping you could test to see how strong our version of Duct Tape is..." Impulse said. 

YES! DO IT! Nightmare yelled in Dream's head, making the other grab his head. "Ok... You mentioned tape and Nightmare flipped out in excitement..." Dream said, making grabby hands towards the two. Impulse handed the blond the tape and waved goodbye to them. Turns out, the tape is more than duct tape. It's friggin chains in a more flexible manner! Poor Yogurt had to cut Dream out from the web Nightmare managed to get them in. Which meant having to destroy some of the outer layer of his clothing to get free... Thankfully it was an old t-shirt and sweats. Easy things for Yogurt and him to remake.

"Mama... Where'd you get that ouchie from?" Yogurt asked, poking the spot where the crying obsidian lay embedded in his skin with a faint purple glow. "Uh...It's an old injury, baby... Can you hand me a new shirt?" Dream asked. "Only if you promise me you'll see Mr. Doc, mama..." Yogurt sniffled, making Dream smile. "Of course my kit. I'll go see him tomorrow." Dream said, kissing Yogurt's head while the boy teared up and hugged Dream. "I can't lose you mama..." He said. 

"You won't, baby... I'll fight to the very end to be with you." Dream hummed as Yogurt waddled to the closet to get a shirt and pajama pants for Dream.

Chapter Text

Dream shook as he fell asleep that night, dreading his fate tomorrow. Doc will make him go through an operation, and he hates sharp objects near his heart... He wasn't looking forwards to tomorrow. Not at all. He'd rather have a colonoscopy than a check-up. A bit extreme, but hey, this man is a gay porn star in an alternate universe, ok?

The hours ticked by and all Dream could dream (pun intended) about was having Doc stab him and he respawns in the void of the SMP. He couldn't handle this. He just wants to find a composter and climb in it. He barely heard the birds chirping with his thoughts. It took Yogurt yanking the blanket off him with an angry look to make Dream shuffle out and to Doc's. 

"Doc? Hey, can you look at something. Yogurt's worried about it." Dream said to Doc. "Of course! What is it?" Doc asked, patting the check-up table of his office. "Um... It's under my shirt..." Dream said, finicking with a mini end crystal that is much more explosive. Doc took it and placed it back in Dream's pack. "Hey, I don't mind as long as you don't." Doc said. Dream nodded and pulled his shirt high enough to show Doc the mark. "What did that?" Doc asked, watching it pulse a faint purple. 

"The portal that dropped us here... I used my last life to take those who deserved rest and peace... I didn't think I'd be one of those individuals..." Dream said. "But?" Doc asked, pressing down around, seeing Dream shake. "But I didn't expect that when I chipped that piece of crying obsidian and lodged it in my chest near my heart that a portal would open up and throw me here... Healed and all..." Dream said, grimacing when Doc touched the shard. 

"So... You hurt yourself, sacrificed your last remaining life to save others, and accidentally saved yourself also?" Doc confirmed. "Well, yeah... At first I thought you guys would kill me and I'd be fine... But then your admin took me to talk with Phil and then Grian got involved and now we're here..." Dream said. "And I'm glad you're here." Doce said, making Dream scoff. He picked up on this and frowned. "Now... You might already know this, but we might need to schedule an operation. When do you think you'll be ready?" Doc asked. "Any day really." Dream said. "How about 3 days from now? Also, I feel like a visit to the therapy office would help with your lack of self love today." Doc said. "Therapy? The only therapist here is Puff..." Dream trailed off, looking at Doc with wide eyes.

"Talking with her may help." Doc said. "Tell the person who abandoned me my deepest dark secrets? That's like stealing a mama bear's cub!" Dream said. "She's not gonna kill you." Doc said. "No, but she'll drug me, and squeeze all that information outta me! Doc, please." Dream said. "Dream... I know of your past with her. I also know that family is important to you. Important enough that if someone wrongs you once, they're dead to you." Doc said.

"But... She chose him …” Dream said. "So you've told me, but have you voiced this to her? How much it hurt you?" Doc asked. "Can't you be a therapist instead?" Dream asked. "Not my specialty. Just try... For me? For Yogurt?" Doc said. "Way to guilt-trip a person... Fine..." Dream said. "Good." Doc said, patting Dream's back.

~~~

For the next two hours, Doc helped Dream schedule an appointment. "So, have a great time with her. Remember, 2 pm." Doc said to Dream, who nodded and shuffled away. "Don't get too mad at her, ok!?" Doc yelled to the flying end dragon. "We can only hope!" He yelled back.

He was already pissed just seeing her shop. Even Nightmare wanted to burn it to the ground and make s'mores with the raging flames. Puffy opened the door and hugged Dream. "Duckling!" She said. Dream grimaced and stayed as stiff as board. "Hi... Look I have a therapy session and Doc wouldn't let me go until I agreed, now let's get this over with so I can drink my sorrows away with apple cider." Dream said. 

Yes, Mumbo managed to mad scientist a way to make apple cider, the alcoholic and nonalcoholic kind. Dream meant the non kind. "But-" Puffy started, but dream wiggled away to get inside. She sighed and followed. "So... What brings you here?" She asked. "Apparently my self love is terrible today and Doc thinks I should talk to you about it." Dream growled. "I'm sensing hostility. Mind telling me why?" She tried.

"March 16th on the tenth human cycle of my life. You tell me." Dream said with such malice the rat in the wall poked its head out to stare at him. "W-What?" Puffy said. "The day you brought home little Foolish. The little demigod who you doted and worried for. The child you abandoned me for. The child you chose to feed. The child whose birthday you remembered. The child you greeted when we both waited at the door for you. Little Foolish, the shark totem who could do no evil. The shark totem who painted me as a bad child when HE HURT THE WHOLE VILLAGE! THE CHILD YOU BELIEVED OVER ME!" Dream yelled, getting out of the couch seat to cage Puffy.

"So if you forgot about that day, I hope you remember now. I hope you realize that the little sickness that spread through the village we lived in at the time was not End related." Dream said. "I-I..." She said. "Oh? No words from a self-proclaimed therapist? Funny how you drug your clients when they're tight lipped, but you shut down when they speak the truth. The great Captain Puffy, Speechless when the dragon egg she stole from the end comes back to remind her of her past..." Dream sneered. "I didn't need this session. But I only did it to make Doc happy." He finished. Puffy sat in her chair while tears brimmed in her eyes. "I didn't mean to neglect you..." She sobbed.

"Oh Great." Dream said, pushing off the chair. "Now we have a narrative between us. The big bad villain has turned to his old ways again." Dream said. "I'm sorry!" Puffy cried. "Sorry isn't going to help 12 human cycles of neglect. Sorry isn't going to change the fact that I suffered. Sorry isn't going to change that I almost sold my Soul to a god one of my best friends is in love with! Sorry isn't going to change shit!" Dream yelled, snapping his curse filter. Damn he really needed that too. 

"What do you want me to say then!?" She yelled. "I just wanted you to help me. I just wanted your attention for one hour! And you spent all your time with HIM! Why do you think I have this personal hatred for him? Why do you think I sneered when he joined the SMP? Why do you think every mob in his area was 15 times more aggressive and stronger than the others? Because I hated his guts and wished he was dead! With a server being connected to me, it knew what I wanted!" Dream said, wiping tears from his eyes.

"But now I'm here. I get to start over. I get to have closure with myself without you. So goodbye Puffy. I hope you never try to be my mother again." Dream said, leaving. So much for not getting too mad...

~~~

The next day was a blast for Dream! He was happy, and his pain was forgotten. Probably because he dumped 12 cycles of hate and pain onto Puffy, who he blamed. "Dream!" He heard. "Goddammit... WHAT, FOOLISH!?" Dream yelled, his anger returning. He still cant shake the hatred for Foolish yet. "YOU YELLED AT MOM!?" Foolish yelled, storming over to Dream. Thank god he was out in a flower field. "Correction. Your mom. She's not my mom anymore! She lost that privilege long ago, so technically, I yelled at a therapist." Dream said. "She came to me crying yesterday saying you hated her." Foolish said. "No, I said I hated you, Foolish. Do you not remember the day you were brought home and how she abandoned my needs for yours? How she took my food and gave it to you when your powers were just developing during the time my own were? Do you not remember when that plague went around radiating your power and she blamed me? Did you forget that you were the favorite?" Dream said, stuffing the flowers he had into his pack and leaving. "What? She didn't do those things!" Foolish said. "Yes. She did." Dream said, turning to look at Foolish. "She pampered you like you were her pride and joy. Which you were. I mean... How many people can get a demigod as a child?" Dream said.

"What about you then, hm?" Foolish shot back. "Me? I'm just a humble ender dragon... A rarity within this world, sought after for our power." Dream said. "Get a boss mob and hybrid book some time. You learn a lot. One of Grian's villagers has one." He finished. "She still loves you." Foolish said. "Oh yeah? Like how she left me to rot in a prison cell? Or like how you convinced her I didn't need help when I clearly showed signs. She didn't need to bat an eye when you called for help. But me?" Dream said. 

"Foolish... You were the favorite. She didn't care for me... I was just a treasure." Dream said. Foolish stood where he was. "Goodbye, Foolish... I hope Scar doesn't give you any gray hair." Dream said, flying off to Stress' base to cry in her lap. Foolish left to talk this out with Puffy. When he did, he was disgusted with how right Dream was. How the other knew Puffy didn't really care. How Dream was originally just a bounty... "Mom... You mean you didn't even want him?" Foolish asked. 

"I didn't think about it... But then I saw you and I instantly wanted to raise you." She said, going to hug Foolish, only to the demigod to move away. "Fooly?" She said. "I- I don't want to talk with you." Foolish said. Puffy stood where she was, messaging Niki.

You whisper to Nihachu: Niki? Am I a bad mom?

Nihachu whispers to you: Well... You successfully lost two children...

You whisper to Nihachu: Not helping

Nihachu whispers to you: Puffy, look around at all the parents here. You know what they do that you don't?

Nihachu whispers to you: They spend time with their kids.

Puffy stared at her communicator with a sigh, before typing again. 

You whisper to Nihachu: Well, I lost Foolish now

She set her communicator down with a sob. "I should've been better..." She said. "You should've but you were not. All you can do now is try to mend your sons and get to know Michelle. Repair those relationships and things will change. But first, change your ways." Exdee said. "What?" Puffy sobbed. "You heard me, Captain Puffy. Fix your way of life to mend the strained relationships." The god said before leaving.

Chapter Text

Dream grumbled as he stomped around off Hermitcraft. Stupid Doc making him go see stupid Puffy. Stupid Foolish for siding with her... "Ugh, I can't believe this!" He yelled, kicking a stone off the main island in Hypixel. "I could always rip their spleens out!" Nightmare said. "No, Night... All I need is for you to get carried away." Dream said. "Yo! Dream! Hey, I haven't seen you here since you were a baby runner!" He heard.

'Shit! It's Illumina! Nightmare, don't do anything stupid!' He thought, turning to see the other. "Lumy! What's up, man?" Dream asked, hugging the other. "You and your tall ass... But to answer your question, I've been great. Practicing for upcoming MCC's and other tournaments." Illumina hummed. "Hmm... Must've been fun..." Dream said. "How have you been? I heard your server went down..." Illumina said. Dream laughed and scratched his head. "Had to shut the poor thing down... A virus snuck in while I was away and it weaved itself into the code of the game so bad I had to just shut it down and delete the place..." Dream said. 

"Oh, I'm sorry man... Wanna speedrun to cheer up?" The other asked. Dream shook his head and smiled. "Nah, You go speedrun with Fruit. I'm sure he'd love to co-run with you. I have to get home..." Dream said. "Which is~?" Illumina teased. "Near here..." Dream said. "Oh C'mon! You can tell me!" The masked one teased. "One day, Lums... But I have to get back... family and all. Oh! Did I tell you! I have a son! He's so adorable. I'll send you a few pictures of him... Once I find my comm... I'll see you later, Lumina!" Dream said, running away to escape the conversation. 

"What would happen if I ate his eyes?" Nightmare asked. "Not helping." Dream said. "Think about it! Ooey, Gooey, Jelly-like eyeballs popping in your mouth." Nightmare said, drooling at the thought. "Ew. I can't even eat cow eyes." Dream said. "I love eyes. Hey, what if we stopped there?" Nightmare said, turning Dream's head to the custom music shop there. "Night, no..." Dream said, but Nightmare was already walking them there. "Oh! Hello! What songs are you looking for today, sir?" The small clerk girl giggled. 

"I'm looking for songs about the DreamSMP or depressing ones in general." Nightmare said. "Well, I have many on the DreamSMP. Not many depressing ones, but I can get those for you. Do you have your communicator by any chance?" She asked. Dream nodded and glared at the mirror wind chimes next to him, where Nightmare was laughing his ass off in. She took Dream comm and copied over the songs. "That'll be 800 credits!" She said. Dream transferred the credits and left to Hermitcraft, listening to the songs.

He stopped in his tracks when Ain't no crying came on. "This is. This is L'manburg..." he said, going back in his head and grimacing about how Ghostbur and Wilbur are two entities of the same person. Tommy always tells him about how when he was about 10, Wilbur taught him how to correctly hold a bow... "Mhm... Are you glad of my little performance" Nightmare cackled. "I'm gonna throw us off a bridge." Dream said, skipping the song. Vibrant eyes... Wait... Ranboo... His fear of him.. Nightmare's cackles as the boy's enderwalking did more harming than observing! New song, Muffin... Ok, not too bad. Bad was fine... He was possessed by an egg. Then skeppy, then ant, then punz, then ponk, Hannah, Phil almost... Oh god, he's a terrible person.

"No one really noticed the difference between me and you… Not until Hermitcraft…  Why did they notice then? Was this my destiny after all?" Dream thought… He hit next again and Fireborn…  Sapnap…  "He didn't notice either…" Dream said

"WHY AM I IN DEPRESSION AND OTHER PROBLEMS!?" Dream yelled, scaring a few loitering teens into running into the skyblock portal. "Because the SMP was depressing. Duh." Nightmare hummed. Dream held his head as he squat down where he was, crying slightly. This is all his fault. The SMP would still be here if he wasn't gullible. He'd be normal if he had stayed with George. He wouldn't have as many scars as he does now! He wouldn't have lost Sam or made Quackity an enemy! He would've allowed L'manburg to be a nation with negotiations instead of war! He would've been happier! Right? But... Puffy still would've abandoned him... Foolish would eventually come to the server because of his bleeding heart... 

The walk to Hermitcraft made Dream want to carve his brain out with a digital clock. By the time he got to Karl-themed songs (Turn back time was his favorite, he had that song on repeat) he had made it back to Hermitcraft and it was midday. He sighed as he laid on the grass where he spawned at in a starfish pattern, staring at the sky and the bees passing by... Bees, Tubbo, Fireworks, Death, Screams, Techno, Philza, Prison, Pain, Suffering, Suici- He shook his head as his comm pinged.

Dream has joined the game

<Stressmonster101: Hatchling!>

<Dream: Mama!>

<Falsesymmetry: Oh? No puffy?>

<Nihachu: She's MIA rn>

<Quackity: Someone save me>

<Sapnap: Y'all hear sumthin>

<Karljacobs: Can I use someone's XP farm?>

<Docm77: Remember, do not exceed 100 levels Karl, that medication is not designed for anything higher than 100 levels!>

<Dream: Is doc experimenting on karl again?>

<Georgenotfound: He's trying to cure his memory bits.>

<Sapnap: Beckerson! Mama read to me a scroll!>

<DreamXD: Karl?>

<Lady_Death: Phil made me one of these talky things!>

<Ph1lza: Kristen, they're called Communicators.>

<Tommyinnit: Hi Mum!>

<Lady_Death: Hi baby!>

<itsFundy: Yogurt here. Mama, when are we making that shrine for Mrs. Minecraft?>

<Dream: Very soon. Once you decide what wood to use.>

Dream smiled as he started to walk around the server, cooling off as Turn back time played again. "Dream. I want to talk with you." He heard. "What Puffy? Can't you see I want to be alone?" He growled, turning slightly to see her. She noticed his red eyes and sighed. "Nightmare, please. I just want to talk with him." She pleaded. 

"I- I don't have time… Look Puffy. I get it, you want to start over, but I'd rather not… 22 human years of neglect can do a lot to a hybrid. Just leave me alone for a bit…" Dream said, walking away from the sheep hybrid. Puffy didn't get the memo apparently. She just followed Dream around, even climbing into the trees he used to get away from her. "PUFFY! PLEASE GO AWAY!" He yelled.  It didn't take long for Dream to hurt himself while trying to escape Puffy. Nope. Thirty minutes later, he's gotten tangled in a cave spider's web with Puffy doing a terrible job of cutting his wings free. She's knicked his wing's and the thin skin around them so many times he's sure he can't fly. "For prime's sake!" Dream said, grabbing the sword from her and cutting himself free. "That's how you cutting wings out of cobwebs, Puffy." He sighed. "Now, go away before you cause me more trouble." Dream grumbled.

Puffy shook her head and kept at him. This was for 6 hours. That's sunset time. Which means mobs. Mean ones too. Dream looked at his tools and sighed. His pickaxe was practically dead and holding it while fighting mobs isn't really the best idea…  Nightmare was no help either. "Come on! Let me have control! You'll be fine!" Nightmare pleaded. Dream held his head as he walked. First he has an internal crisis, then his 'mother' tries to restart things and now his resident troublemaker is trying to cause more trouble!

"Just great. Just a great, monkey flipping day... First I have to pay for songs Nightmare wanted, then Puffy, and NOW THIS! Why did I get the short stick today!?" Dream yelled, kicking an aggroed spider off his tree. "Dream, Please! Now's not the time to complain about your day!" Puffy huffed. "Um, Kinda, yeah. It's been terrible!" Dream shot back. "Look! I didn't mean for this to happen!" She said. "Really? What didn't you mean to happen? Abandonment or having it so I can't EFFIN' FLY!? Everything you touch BREAKS, Puffy!" Dream yelled as a skeleton shot a creeper. "what!? I didn't mean to hurt your wings! I only wanted to talk!" She said.

"And yet, I can't fly now, my mental health is in the toilet, but I can't let my son and husband know, no one knew or noticed I was possessed except Tubbo and my husband, and they didn't really help all that much... Oh! And look! Our tools are useless! You broke my peace! And I don't carewhat argument you have to rebuttal, because I blame you!" Dream said, hopping in place where his cobblestone platform was. Yes, he's learned from the hermits how to make a quick platform of safety when times are desperate. Puffy huffed as she slowly made her own, but she eventually ended up on the same platform as Dream when spiders learned they could climb.

Nightmare was begging at this point for Dream to let him cause some chaos. Dream held his head as Puffy screamed and yelled about the spiders clambering over the platform lip. "PUFFY, SHUT UP!" Dream sobbed, clinging to his head more. Puffy had to carry Dream off and somewhere where she could call for help.

With no blocks, meant they had to keep moving... And with constant moving means ick... And Dream is feeling the ick. "Puffy... Puffy, put me down..." Dream hicked, covering his mouth. The other did so and made sure Dream was fine... He was not. You know the feeling of having motion sickness, vertigo, and mentural cramps at the same time? No? No one else has had that before? Well, it's not fun... 

You can barely lift your head to toss your stomach contents out from you. Let alone have the patience to even throw up. Dream threw up whatever he ate on the grass and didn't realize after he was done that there was a creeper about to explode on him. "Dream!" Puffy yelled, pulling Dream to her and spinning them so she'd take the brunt of the explosion.

No one knew of this! Until Doc's comm pinged.

Froghorn blew up

<Docm77: Who's outside?>

<CaptainPuffy: Me and dream>

<CaptainPuffy: need help>

<MumboJumbo: On our way>

<Stressmonster101: Doc, where was Froghorn at last?>

<Docm77: Sending coords to you guys now>

<Skeppy: These guys have a better system of communication than we do!>

<Sapnap: Everyone shaddup, it's 3 in the morning and I have to get Beckerson to a sparring lesson with Techno tomorrow.>

<Dream: Sorry, sap... Didn't mean to be dying>

<Sapnap: Screw sleep, wru?>

<Docm77: check whispers>

<Sapnap: omw, don't move Dream>

<CaptainPuffy: And me too, right?>

No one responded to Puffy. Stress wanted to curse her out for child abandonment and many other crimes she's committed against Dream, Mumbo was busy looking healing items, Sapnap was getting dressed and telling Karl to go back to sleep, and Doc was mourning over the fact that his guard creeper is gone now.

When the 4 get to them, they see Puffy with a scorched up back and Dream with a few arrows in him and damaged wings. "I'll get Dream with Stress. Doc, Sap, you guys get Puffy." Mumbo said, pulling Stress to heal Dream while Sapnap and Doc took Puffy. "Sapnap, cool your flames." Doc hushed, making the other look away and pout. "Sorry... Here's a healing pot..." Sapnap said. "We're gonna need more than a potion to help her, Sap. Mumbo, can you message someone who is awake to sleep real quick. Bdubs is off server and Karl isn't counted as a player yet." Doc said. "How is Karl not a player?" Sap asked. "Well, since you guys had a god meddling around, he was gifted powers that made him... Not human. Now after a while of unused, he'll return to normal, Sapnap. Don't worry." Doc said.

Mumbo ended up on getting the teens to sleep. Ranboo was the only one who willingly slept. The other three had to be drugged, but that tangy seasoning on their snacks was not the sedative! (it was, they were spending the day with Impulse and Zedaph and Mumbo said by any means do it) The next day, the group of... Hold on... 4+2+4+2=... 12? Math is hard...

Anyway! The group of 10 awake players worried about the 2 recovering players. "What happened?" Tubbo asked, petting Dream's hair while Micheal braided bits and bobs. "Mob ambush is my guess." Sapnap said. "If Doc's creeper didn't go off, we wouldn't have gotten to them." Mumbo said as Impulse had to hold Stress back from strangling Puffy. What? Stress is in Mama Bear mode! her beby was in pain and she's gonna kill who she thinks caused it. (Kinda hard to kill a demigod too, but hey, this is Stress, she'd find a way to kill Foolish since Dream blames him for his pain too) 

When Puffy woke up, Dream was snuggled up with Yogurt and Fundy while he read a book. "Duck- Dream?" She said, making the other turn his head and smile in the awkward way that said 'the f-ck you want?' "Hm?" He hummed, putting the book down when Yogurt buried his face in his chest more. "I want to be mother and son again." She said. Dream sighed and played with Yogurt's hair.

"I'm sorry Puffy. But you killed that cow a long time ago. You'll never be my mom, just as Foolish will never be my brother. My biological mother is an enderdragon who was killed protecting me. My adoptive mother is Stress, who cares for me and helps fill in the 22 missing human years of my life. I'm officially 1 ender year. I'm barely old enough to speak in ender years!" He said, hugging Yogurt close.

"I'm sorry... But, can we refresh?" She asked. Dream sniffled and called Zedaph in. "Yes, Dream?" Zed asked. "I wanna go home now, please." Dream said. "But your wings, Dream. They're almost healed." Zed said. "There's a waterfall to my home... I can swim... Please." Dream begged. Zedaph sighed and glanced at Puffy. "Ok... But you better hand me a key so I can check up on your reckless butt, mister." Zedaph said, making Dream chuckle. 

"I will, Zed." he said, handing his key to Zed. "I made the lock, so I can pick it if I need to. Or use Fundy's key." Dream hummed, shainghis boys awake. "Let's go home." He said. "Ok, mama... Goodbye monter lady." Yogurt said. (Yes, Monter is supposed to be there. Yogurt has a tendency to not say his s's when he's sleepy)

Chapter Text

Remember the swear jar from season 8? Yeah, Dream brought it back just for himself. Since the therapy session with useless, he's been cussing up a storm and Yogurt is not having it. Fundy loves how Dream curses out small things like a vine being 1 centimeter too long. Although, most times Dream gives Yogurt and Fundy a heads up when he's about to explode and destroy something. Usually it's "Fundy... Take Yogurt out somewhere for a few hours." or "Honey, I'll be back in an hour!" But recently... He puffs out smoke and leaves. 

Yogurt's been worried and used Dream's comm when he set it down to message Sapnap and George. Most of the time it's an update on how he's doing. But... Now Yogurt's asking them to visit. When Dream found out, he was relieved Yogurt noticed his internal mental spiral. This prompted the blond to hug his son and cuddle him while the smaller made sure their momma was ok with his friends visiting and checking up.

To say Dream's heart swelled to the point that he thought his chest would burst was the tip of the iceberg. Ever since his visit with Puffy and her mangling of his wings, he's wanted to spawn trap her so badly that all you saw in chat would be her death messages in a variety of ways. "Mama... You're doing the thing again..." Yogurt sniffled, patting Dream's eyes. The blond smiled and closed his eyes, thanking Lady Fate for blessing him with this peace. "What thing, Yogy?" Dream asked. "Your eyes are all purple... Like how Uncle Cub described the Enderdragon!" Yogurt giggled. "Well, Mama is an Enderdragon hybrid..." Dream said. 

Yogurt gasped and pat at Dream's face more. "Does that mean you can spit out purple things and be healed with those crystals that Uncle G likes to blow up?" He asked. "Well... Sorta... Since I haven't been there in so long, most of those traits I have are not used anymore." Dream said. Yogurt kept asking questions about the end and if any of the stories the hermits have told him and the other toddles were true. Which now that Dream thinks about it, he's kind of glad that they have a variety of babysitters. 

Just as Yogurt began asking about how endermen get hurt by water, Sapnap and George broke the door down. "DREAM!?" Sapnap yelled, making the blond yelp. "What!?" He yelled back, holding Yogurt, who was cackling happily and clapping for George's hat. "Yogurt didn't report your well beingand I feared for the worst!" Sapnap said, rushing over to look over Dream. "I'm fine... I can't really fly because Puffy doesn't understand wings are fragile..." Dream huffed, popping his lips to make a 'pop' noise. 

He's developed a type of stemming when Puffy or anyone related to herein any way is mentioned. Yogurt loves it and replicates it when he's happy. George hands Yogurt his mushroom hat and smiles when the younger placed it on his head. The hat was so big that it covered Yogurt's eyes and nose! Dream laughed at his son's aloofness and adorable-ness. "Mama! Look! I'm Uncle Gogy!" Yogurt squealed.

It's days like these where Dream is thankful he gather up the will to wake up. "Say, I've been thinking..." Dream started, looking at George who dropped an anvil from his inventory. "Whoops." George said. "Why do you just have an anvil?" Sapap asked. "Why are you focused on me? Focus on Dream thinking. That's never a good thing." George said.

"Oi!" Dream gasped. "I think perfectly well, thank you!" he huffed. "Bless you, mama..." Yogurt said, making Sapnap snort. "No, Yogurt, that was a huff, not a sneeze, bubs." Sapnap said, picking the boy up. "Oh..." Yogurt sniffed. Sapnap smiled and kissed the boy's hair like any respectable uncle would to comfort their nephew. "What's on your mind, Dreamster?" Sapnap hummed, taking George's hat off Yogurt's head and placing it aside. "What if we joined the next upcoming MCC? We haven't been in one since... Uh... A long time now..." Dream laughed. 

"You sure? You do know that MCC's could trigger an episode..." George said. "I'll be fine. And! That gives me time to fill my camera roll with pictures of Yogurt to shove in Illumina's face." Dream hummed. "I dunno... We might be on separate teams..." Sapnap started. "And no one really nows your face except server..." George jumped in. "You'd have to wear your mask again..." Sapnap finished. 

Dream waved his hands and took Yogurt. "I'll be fine. I'll just have to brush up on long-term illusions again... No big deal. And I know Grian will be there, so if anything triggers me, he'll sense it. Come on you guys... We used to do manhunts to practice for these things!" Dream said. "Dream... We did manhunts to satisfy your need for being chased around." Sapnap said. "You were no better, Sap. You got a kick out of screaming at us..." George sniffled.

Sapnap stuck his tongue out while Dream began to get the forms to sign up for the next MCC.

~~~

The next week, the three trained like they were in their teenage years again... Dream was more focused of fighting, George on shooting his bow, and Sapnap... Well he had doc and Tango make a version of hole in the wall.... He hated that event. He was ok at it... But he hated it still. "To your left!" Tango called for Sap, but the boy was too slow, getting hit into the water below. "Is this thing getting faster!?" Sapnap yelled after he resurfaced. "It's an exponential acceleration!" Doc called out. "What?!" Sapnap coughed. Dream helped him out of the pit of water and smiled. 

"Don't worry. We have a whole month to get back in shape." Dream said, drying Sapnap's hair. "Oh yeah? Like how you can flawlessly hop from floating blocks like before?" Sapnap huffed. "You and I both know, I'm not at that level anymore...Take George! He's struggling to hit the moving targets Mumbo rigged up to act and move like players!" Dream said, hugging the younger. "We have some work to do. Don't worry." Dream finished.

Both moved onto dodgebolt, and to say Grian was flipping out about how Dream had adopted the 'gangster' hold for his bow would be an understatement. Everyone wondered how Dream managed to shoot all the targets while he was on his knees with a horizontal bow without breaking a sweat. Sapnap tried Dream's stance, but all he hit was a cow, bee, and 2 rabbits... How the hecc? "How did you manage to hit mobs but not haystacks!?" George asked, making Sapnap shrug. "Universe convenience?" the ravenette replied.

The rest of the month was pretty standard. The three got their invitations, Grian made sure they all knew the help words, Scar would get obliterated by hole in the wall and Buildmart Grian shaking the living candy corn outta him, all while False, Gem, and few other members practiced other events. Doc had to make a more heavy duty version of Scar's leg braces where water was friendly and falling doesn't shatter them... Which meant he had to duck tape and spit metals and chemicals together to make an alloy strong enough to survive Scar.

~~~

The day arrived and Dream placed the illusion on, grimacing at his reflection. "What if we put kick someone during the games?" Nightmare gabbled. "I will drive this stick in my head if you say anything else." Dream said, pointing a random stick at the tinted glass. Nightmare simply grumbled and stayed quiet. "Mama! You rea.... Dy? Who are you?" Yogurt said, staring at Dream. "Just me, Yogy." Dream said, dropping the illusion. "Oh! Hi Mama! Anyway! The MCC group is ready to go... You sure you don't want me to come with?" Yogurt asked, making Dream smile and kneel down with open arms, signaling for the child to run over and give him a hug.

Dream chuckled and placed a kiss on the side of Yogurt's ear. "I'll be fine, sweetheart. Say, how about you do me a favor and watch from here, ok? That way you'll know how I'm doing." Dream said, pulling away enough for Yogurt to look at him. "Ok, mama... You go kick papa's butt!" Yogurt giggled, making Dream smile. "Ok dear." Dream said, casting the illusion again. "Now remember, water Patches and if any of the others come by, make sure they get home before sunset." Dream said. "Got it! Water the Patchie, have a sleepover!" Yogurt said, hopping in place and pulling Dream to where the MCC contestants of the server were. 

Which was by Doc's lab. "Sam! Wear this!" Doc beamed, tossing an amped up shock collar at the creeper. Sam caught it and looked at Doc with a pleading look. Shame Zedaph had a remote to help amp the settings, even though it's already at the max... Sam's gonna die. Quackity was no better, he was under Bdubs' beck and call today, and that meant the big-eye man was going to make him wish he was never born. 

"Ok, bye guys! Remember have fun!" Tina cheered, waving every team's color. "Thanks Tina!" False said. The group went through the portal and groaned at the environment change. "Ow.. Too bright..." Scar grooaned, covering his eyes. "Ok, everyone! Color check ins!" Puffy said, looking at her coat with a blank look. "I can't see my color..." she said. "Damn, I'm with the colorblind..." Dream teased, earning a punch on the arm by Sapnap. "Dream!" Sapnap said. 

"What? There's no toddlers around. I'm allowed to curse." Dream said. "Grian!" Tommy huffed. Grian put his hand out and Dream groaned and handed the other 10 coins from his past MCC's. "Ok! So... Have fun everyone!" Cub hummed. "Guys! Hello! It's so good to see you guys!" Scott beamed, running over to hug each of them. 

"Hi Scott! You ready?" Dream chuckled. "As always... Say, when are you ever going to make a happier mask?" Scott asked. "Soon."Dream said. The horn for decision dome sounded and the teams were teleported to their containers. "I vote battle dome!" George said. "I vote- Ack!" Sam started only for him to get shocked. "what?" Dream asked. "I- Wack!" Sam yelped. "What about-" Puffy started only for Dream to throw his egg at Hole in the wall. "Whoops." Dream said.

Yogurts laughed at his mama's evilness down at Hermitcraft. Philza had stayed behind to watch over them. The teams were all dropped in rocket spleef and to say Dream kicked Puffy off her platform a few times... Ok, like 6, but he made sure the cameras didn't catch him. What? He's a petty individual... (Actually, the writer is. They just enjoy making Dream themselves for a bit) "Yo! 15th out of 40!" Dream yelled, looking at Sam and George. Puffy was silent. "What'd you get Puffy?" Dream asked. "..." She said. "What?" Dream teased. "40th..." she said louder. "Still can't hear you~!" Dream sang, making George and Sam tilt their heads in confusion. "I GOT 40TH!" She screamed. Dream cackled and fell backward in his spectator mode. 

Ace race was... Meh? Dream came in 37th... Not his best... Then TGTTOS (For those who cant decipher, to get to the other side) came around, Dream was already sad, depressed, homesick, and on the verge of strangling Puffy. She wasn't doing bad... But his emotions are what fuels his actions... Sap noticed this and made a mental note to check in with Grian about this. That was a good event for Dream and his team! they place 5th! which means.. Their team is probably in 8th place? Dream's not doing good, Zedaph is making Sam miserable... and George was George.... Puffy was busy trying to make amends with Dream, but Dream was ignoring her. 

During the break, Sapnap dragged Dream and huffed. "Ok, what's going on?" Sapnap said. "Wha?" Dream asked. "You've never done as bad as you have today. You don't even act like this on Hermitcraft!" Sapnap said. "I... I... I dunno. I thought this would be fun... But all I'm having is evil moments. I- Sap, I'm not having fun." Dream said. "Can you drop the illusion? Please?" Sapnap asked, cupping Dream's face. Dream did so and looked at Sapnap with greenish-purple eyes.

"╎ᓭ ╎ℸ ̣  ʖᔑ↸?" Dream asked. "H-Huh?" Sapnap said. Dream sobbed and switched to ASL, making two fists and pulling them towards himself. "Want... Want what? Dream, tell me." Sapnap said. Dream did it again and added G-R-I-A-N with their respective hand letters. A crooked gun for G, crossing his index and middle fingers for R, a pinky out for I, a fist with flat fingers for A, and another fist with his thumb between his middle and ring fingers for N. "You want Grian, Ok... Will he help translate?" Sapnap asked. Dream nodded and sat on the floor, curling up in a ball. 

Sapnap called Grian and the other ran to their location, which was the southeastern corner. "What happened?" Grian asked. "I was wondering what was going on since he's never performed this poorly. Then he had an emotional breakdown and now he's speaking a language close to what Ranboo speaks when he enderwalks." Sapnap said. Grian nodded and sat next to Dream. "ʖᔑ↸ ↸ᔑ||?" Grian asked. Dream nodded and hid more. Grian hugged him and hummed a tune close his timelapse music he used when he felt the need to record it. 

"╎ ℸ ̣ ⍑𝙹⚍⊣⍑ℸ ̣  ℸ ̣ ⍑╎ᓭ ∴ᔑᓭ ⊣𝙹╎リ⊣ ℸ ̣ 𝙹 ʖᒷ ⎓⚍リ... ╎ℸ ̣ 'ᓭ リ𝙹ℸ ̣   ̇/ᒷꖎᑑ⚍ᔑ... ╎ ↸𝙹リ'ℸ ̣  ∴ᔑリリᔑ ↸𝙹 ℸ ̣ ⍑╎ᓭ ᔑリ||ᒲ𝙹∷ᒷ..." Dream hiccuped, burying his face in Grian's aqua jumper. "I know... But it's ok... Why are you not showing your wings or tail?" Grian asked in English. "∴𝙹∷∷╎ᒷ↸. ∴⍑ᔑℸ ̣  ╎⎓ ℸ ̣ ⍑ᒷ|| ʖᔑリ ᒲᒷ?" Dream said. "They won't. You wanna know why?" Grian said, making Dream nod. "They don't wanna lose one of their legendary contestants. Did you know, many viewers come to see you, Sap, and so many more compete? Shoot, even I have a few viewers who get crazy when I lose..." Grian said, referencing to the time Scar had a fit of rage when Grian's team lost and blew out an entire chunk of water near his (Scar's) base. Sap chuckled at Grian's intake of air. 

"I'm guessing we know them?" Sapnap asked. Grian nodded. "Scar is... Scar had a moment that day..." Grian chuckled. Dream sniffled out a laugh, but hid his head still. "Say, we have 6 more games left... Maybe you can bounce back, Dreamie..." Sap said. "For what? for your team to bodyslam mine against the wall? No way..." Dream said. "Hey! That new addition makes it better for the losing teams!" Sapnap said. "Of the previous round... At this point, if the team with the first win has won, the losers should just throw themselves in lava..." Dream said. 

Sure enough, the next 6 games were ok... Dream placed high enough to be in the top 15... Not his best, but hey... He had fun messing with Puffy and Sam! "Go Yellow Yaks! Show those boys that women can kick some ass!" Dream yelled, drawing more attention than he wanted to. Poor Yogurt... He had to hide in his bed's blankets to watch, since it was waaay past his bedtime on Hermitcraft, but he wasn't gonna miss this for the whole world! "Hey!? What about us!?" Tubbo huffed. 

"You're fine!" Dream laughed. Dream looked around as the round started, trying to find Scott. He saw Illumina in the stands as well as a few of the Nox crew. He slinked over to where Scott was, with Jimmy, and tapped him. "Dream! Hi! What's up?" Scott beamed. "Um... C-Can you and a few others come talk with me after this?" Dream shyly asked. "Of course! Is it something that should be urgent, because I can call the crew over now." Scott said. "Uh... Whenever is convenient?" Dream said. "Yo! Dreamie boy! What is up!?" Jimmy piped up, making Scott and Dream fall to the floor in laughter. "Wha? Oh come on!" Jimmy yelled, looking in his camera to see Joel had somehow placed a pufferfish on Jimmy's head. 

"Of course! Joel!" Jimmy yelled walking away. Scott and Dream recovered and sighed. "After Dodgebolt, 'kay?" Scott said. Dream nodded and smiled. "Oh, and Dream... It's nice to see you've changed your mask." Scott said. Dream looked at his camera and smiled. His usual ':)' mask was now a '>v<' kinda mask. Cute when you think about it!

Chapter Text

Dream cheered and waved his yellow banner as he watched the Yellow Yaks were up against the Blue Bats. "YOU GOT THIS SYLVEE! DON"T OVERESTIMATE!" Dream yelled, making the girl in question put her bow down and glare at him. "THEN SHADDAP!" She yelled, making Dream cackle in hysterics. "Dream! Stop encouraging her!" Tubbo huffed. Sapnap grabbed his cam and spun around to show Yogurt what was going on, since he knew Yogurt would toss his sleep schedule to the sharks to see his mama in a competition.

BLUE BATS WIN

The stadium erupted into cheers and GG's as the Blue team was teleported to the winner's podium. "Yeah! Whooo!" Dream cheered, looking for the yellow team and running over to congratulate them on getting 2nd. The girls all hugged him and told him was a walking teddy bear of good vibes and excitement. The blond smiled and made sure those girls hydrated and had fun before he began to scour the place for his victims.

Scott was easy to find with his Lime green everything, the Noxies were also easy with them being up in the air, but his last was Captain of the Sparklez... Who was being crowded by everyone since it was his first ever win! *pops the firecrackers* After Dream pulled all of them aside, he fidgeted a little. "Hey, what's up, Dream?" Sparklez asked. "Um.. Well, Sparklez... You're like a father to me, so don't hate me for this." Dream said. "Why would I hate you?" Captain asked, making Dream shrug. "I dunno, but anyway!" Dream said, dropping his mask's illusion and smiling before he shook his body and showed his hybrid bits. You know, the tail, bandaged wings, the horns, the little snaggle teeth he has... Things that made Scott coo at him. 

"Why'd you coo at him like he was a puppy?" One of the Nox members asked. "He's an enderdragon hatchling!" Scott cooed, going over to hug Dream. Sparklez looked at Dream and hummed. "How'd you know he was a hatchling?" The blue team member asked. "No scales underneath his eyes! By the time hatchlings are older than 1 year they begin to develop scales here and here." Scott said, smoothing over the bags underneath Dream's eyes and cheeks. "Once they get past 3, their scales will cover patches of their shoulders, torsos and sometimes, their hands and feet! Oh, the scale development process is so unique, that it's almost impossible to predict where they'll be!" Scott said, patting Dream's face and smiling at the other's little purrs. 

"Don't worry, Dream. You're always welcome here." The Nox members said. Dream smiled and nodded while Scott fussed over how his wings got damaged. Sparklez hugged the other and smiled while congratulating him on being confident enough to tell them. During the after-party, which consisted of toasts to every team for doing their best, everyone decided to call the event over. The media was already flipping out over Sparklez getting his first win and the fact that Dream and anyone who was on the SMP/Hermitcraft decided to come back after being MIA for who knows how long! 

"Alright, gang... Everyone have a good time?" Grian asked. A chorus of Yes and mhm rang out with Sam simply huffing when the shock collar finally shut down. "Hey, Guys! Can I talk with Dream for a sec?" Scott said. "He's not in trouble is he!?" False yelled, jumping to protect Dream. "He's ok, False. I just wanna talk with him." Scott said, putting his hands up as a sign of peace. "On my way, Scott. You guys go back, the portal doesn't close unless everyone who entered came back through." Dream said.

The group sighed and did as Dream said. With their backs to Dream and Scott, Scott enveloped Dream in a bone crushing hug. "I'm so proud of you, Dream." Scott said. "Huh? Why?" Dream asked. "I just am... You know, if you were worried about being in trouble or hated over being a boss mob hybrid, you didn't have to be." Scott said. "Really? But everyone else here is a common hybrid. Sapnap's technically under the blaze category." Dream said, making Scott smile. "Dream... You're talking to an amalgamation of 7 common mobs. You're fine." Scott said. "Well... There's more going one behind my mask... So much more..." Dream said, letting go of Scott to rub his arms. "Like what?" Scott asked.

This prompted Dream to go on a whole red web of his story while leaving the crazy bits out. Scott seemed to piece the crazy bits together even without being told them and smiled. "Don't worry, Dream. My brother was possessed by two or so demons and was hellbent on causing destruction. Not to mention Third Life and Last Life... Each time those servers were possessed by something...." Scott said, furrowing his brows at the memories. 

"Hold up, Last Life and Third Life? There's like an unspoken rule on Hermitcraft where they don't talk about that." Dream said. "Well, Third life was a test run of sorts. It was supposed to be fun, but something happened... I can't give you many specifics on this since, I was mostly stuck with Jimmy and how fast he died." Scott said. "Sorry to pry more, but, do you remember who was on that server with you guys?" Dream asked. "Uh... Joel, Bigb, Martyn... Oh! Impulse's buddy, Skizzleman! Those are the only guys I can think of who you haven't really met all that much." Scott said. "Thank you, Scott! See you next MCC?" Dream said. "Of course! Bye Dream!" Scott said, getting dragged away to help clean up the place and reset it. 

~~~

The next few days, Dream was up early trying to contact any of those 4 ex Third-Lifers. He settled on Skizz, since he was easier to converse with. Why? Skizz was a straight-to-the-point type of player. This prompted the back and forth of where to meet, what day and time, and if they should bring gifts (Dream's impulsive idea and fear of leaving people on read). The day came and Dream left the server to hop onto the coffee shop server Skizz suggested. Who would've thought that there was a server dedicated on being a coffee shop!? (Loser did, but not a single one of their irl friends thought that was a good idea) 

Dream entered the shop and looked around lost. "Hello! How can I help you today?" a bubbly girl asked. Dream looked at her and noticed the blue, yellow, and pink highlights in her light brown hair. "Hi. Um.. I'm supposed to meet someone here?" Dream said. "Oh... How about we get you something to drink while you wait, huh?" She beamed. Dream looked at her tag and hummed. "Weird? That's a specific name?" Dream said in a questioning manner. "Ah... My parents knew from the beginning that I was a little shaken up, up here." She said, tapping her head. "So... Would you like a coffee or tea?" Weird asked. "How about you choose?" Dream said, making the smaller hop in place. "Really?" SHe asked. "Mhm." Dream said.

Turns out, Weird has an odd taste. Somehow, Dream ended up with a passionfruit soda with blue raspberry syrup and a hint of lime. Tastes great! But by the time she got it to him and let him take a sip, Skizz had entered the place. "You're here already!?" Skizz gasped, making Dream cover his mouth to keep the portion he had drank in his mouth while he laughed and nodded. "Mhm!" Dream said, watching the other shuffle over and hop in a seat next to him. 

"You know, Pulsey tells me a lot about you and your friends." Skizz hums. "I hope he doesn't exaggerate us too much." Dream said after he swallowed down the sip. "Nah... He's only called you a sweetheart, your friend Sapnap a walking lava source, and your friend George a sleepy warrior." Skizz said. "Yep, over-exaggerated..." Dream joked. "So, I hear you want to know about Third life!" Skizz chuckled. "Uh, yeah..." Dream said. "Well then, get your notebooks and pens, because we're gonna be here for a while." Skizz said.

3 passion-berries, 4 sweet berry muffins and 14 peppermints later, Weird and Dream had a whole visual novel of Third Life and Last Life. Weird did the drawings while Dream wrote the notes. After their little meeting, Dream returned home with a sorrowful mood. Who would've thought a joke could begin the domino effect of destruction and deceit?

Man! Even Nightmare was quiet and contemplating his own existence after Skizz! Dream made his way home and sat on his side of the shared bed he had with Fundy. What? They're an unofficial married couple at this point! When he laid down to try to sleep, all his mind could say was 'That was almost like what happened on the SMP...' 

Chapter Text

After the MCC, Doc made sure to check up on Dream. Yes, that meant X-rays with his mostly unsafe x-ray machine... Thankfully, it didn't blow up on them! Though... It did show Doc that the shard was practically embedded into Dream. Like, when he was dropped here, the respawn mechanics caused his body to heal, like normal, but it healed in a way that wrapped around the shard. Meaning that if Doc removed it carelessly, Dream could die or have permanent problems such as trouble with breathing, heart irregularities, and so forth. Usual problems with hearts and lungs with foreign objects!

So, Doc told Dream about this in the most discreet way possible, since Yogurt, Beckerson, and Slime were there. Slime was getting help from Yogurt and Beckersom on his speech, which Dream thought was adorable. Of course, Yogurt's sensitive ears picked up on the whispering and ran to his mama, hugging him. "Don't leave me, mama!" Yogurt sniffled, burying his hed in Dream's tummy. "Oh, Darling... I'll never leave you." Dream said. "Of course, there is a small chance." Doc said, earning a playful glare. "Doc..." Dream said. 

This prompted Yogurt to playfully bite at Doc's cybernetic arm. Still, the two made an appointment for the next morning, making Yogurt whine and complain about not being able to wake his mama up that day. Dream simply placed a kiss on Yogurt's hair and ushered him to helping Beckerson and Slime pronounce Ambidextrous. This prompted all three of them to ask Dream and Doc what it meant. "It means you can use your right hand and left hand equally." Dream said. 

"Think of it as this. You can write with your left and right hand with an equal amount of success." Doc said. "So does that mean Micheal is Ambidesterous!" Beckerson asked. "I guess? Why?" Dream asked. "He can draw with both hands!" Yogurt said. "Then yes." Dream finished. "Hungy..." Slime sniffled, slowly melting into a puddle of green goop. Dream got a bucket and scooped Slime into it, ushering the boys with him. "How about we go see Uncle Ren's restaurant, hm? I hear he's got a new treat for you guys." Dream said, making Beckerson gasp. "Maybe he's got da kelp thingies!" He squeaked.

Ren did! He made a Beckerson-friendly portion of his menu, and the little one was so thankful he made sure to give Ren and extra long hug. Yogurt was happy, Slime was being fed by Dream, which was somewhat concerning seeing how unfazed Dream was to having a little glob of slime poke out of the bucket and make 'ah!' noises. 

The nest morning, Dream was at Doc's operation ward with Zedaph, Tango, and Ponk to help. "Now, Dream... We're going toneed you to be unconscious during this... Are you comfortable with this?" Zedaph asked, while he prepared the IV's and tools needed. "Yeah... As long you make sure you guys wear face masks." Dream said. "wow... Ok... Hmph." Zed teased. This got Dream to laugh a little before Tango and Ponk came over to talk with Dream.

They finally got the anesthesia into Dream and got the shard out, with Ponk fainting at the idea of having that thing inside of Dream, They had put Dream in the observation ward, which was a glass-like cell with a bed and shulker of books, to read and write in, a bunch of custom items such as rubik's cubes, a pack of cards, some dice, and a bunch of music disks for Dream to listen too! Yogurt was bale to visit and curl up with Dream while he recovered, but Doc had to make sure Yogurt knew not to lay on Dream's chest or put any weight on it. Which Yogurt whimpered and whined about, but agreed to anyway. 

The process to recovery for Dream was a little wobbly. He should fine for one day, then he'd wake up heaving and gasping for air, which prompted Zed or Tango to burst into the room with a ventilator... Or... Well, what are those things called that the paramedics have where it's like an oxygen mask but they have to manually pump the air into the person's face? Those things! But most of the time, he's ok. 

This prompted for Sapnap and George to double down on making sure the SMP-ers were behaving. Sapnap would patrol the egglands and make sure they weren't starting another cult (they were, but it was to worship a zombie in all diamond armor), and would sometimes spend time with his parents, but only when they promised they had no weapons or ways to harm him. George was more likely making Quackity his little hunting dog so he didn't have to get an actual dog. Which was beneficial to George mostly! Quackity would be on a leash and dragged around, ordered to kill anything that tries to hurt George while George would do his rounds. 

(Gogy is a dominatrix, ok? My own headcanon, ok? I know that term is for women, but he is, ok?)

Chapter Text

After the operation, the server began to "hiccup". Most times it wasn't concerning! Just a missing block here and there or a villager turning into a zombified version of themselves but still functioning as a regular villager…  again nothing concerning! But then there were some concerning hiccups… Like when Techno and Cleo got fused together and had to be one person for a whole week while X and George tried to unravel their code to get them back to two separate players. 

Poor Cleo…  She had to deal with Techno's abundance of potentially brain-dead voices where all they chanted was E, Blood for the blood god, and other random ideas. Some were adorable, some she wanted to throttle, but most of them were… Very Technoblade. Sarcasm and dark humor with a side of mythology sprinkled about.

"Ok... Ready? When I say left, we both move our left foot. Ok, Techno?" Cleo said while the voices were simply observing. "Eh... Right... Left foot... Which is left again?" Techno said. "oh for-! The hand with a totem in it. We have a totem in our left hand, and an apple in our right. Move the foot on the side where the totem is." Cleo said.

This was the slowest way a conjoined set of players have tried to walk. Dream and George managed this and were fine! How!? "Ok, Techno... Don't freak out... Um... Oh! Remember when Dream and George made a video on this?" Cleo said. "Yeah... They failed their challenge." Techno said. "Good! So you know that they let one take control of the legs while the other had control of the arms!" Cleo beamed. "Do you want me to be responsible for the arms?" Techno grumbled. "Yep!" Cleo said.

Turns out, when they both had visit Dream on their to do lists, the blond admin was in for a shock when a nonbinary zombie pigling walked up to him and explained who they were after they said hello. "What the- Oh my prime! Are you two ok?" Dream fussed. "We're ok... Just working on being one person with many consciousnesses..." They said. "Ok... Um... We're gonna need a name for you guy... Um... Cleoblade sounds like a torture device, Oh! ZombieTechno! Or-" Dream rambled. "I like that one." Cleo's voice spewed from the entity's mouth. "Meh, whatever." Techno's soon followed.

To say the server hiccuped again after this was just the beginning. In fact, Dream got so overwhelmed, he passed out and had the conjoined player rush to catch him. The server had a mini heart attack, which meant the sky glitched, mobs were all wonky, and most importantly! Farmable items doubled. X and George looked at each other and immediately messaged the whole server if they witnessed the same thing.

Answer. Yes. It took the combined efforts of Exdee, George, Xisuma, Grian, Pearl and all the medical experts of the server to make sure Techno, Cleo and Dream were ok. Doc sighed and took Dream. "He's stable, but I'm afraid he's going to be unconscious for the rest of the day." Doc said, looking at Dream's life status. "What!?" George yelled. "Don't worry... He'll be fine. He just can't be in extreme situations or do any strenuous actions for a while..." Doc said. "So, he's ok?" Grian asked, moving Dream's bangs back from his forehead. "Yes... But I must tell you all something..." Doc said, while he looked at the group who were present during the operation. 

~~~

"So, Dream died and the magic he used took him too?" George said. "Yes. Which now that I think about it, was a godsend." Doc said. "How so?" Sapnap asked. They had called an emergency meeting and the shopping district so everyone could hear. "If he hadn't... You guys wouldn't have the peace you all desperately craved." X said. "He's done so much... For everyone." Puffy said. "EVen though he had an evil streak..." Sam grumbled, making everyone glare at him. "Did you friggin' forget he was possessed and tried so hard to ask for help?" Tubbo said. "Well, weren't you 'Dreamon hunters' supposed to help him?" Sam asked. "Uh, to be fair, Theydid do their jobs, but they were dealing with something more difficult than a demon." Pearl said. 

"Look, we're all stressed, but if we can make a list of those who'd like to help make sure Dream makes a full recovery, then we'll be a step closer to stopping the hiccups of the server." X said. "Which I have a question about!" Gem said. "Yes, Gem?" Grian asked. "The server is more in tune with Dream... Does that mean he's the main admin?" She asked. "Possibly. I've checked the server's admin, and it states Xisuma and Dream are the main admins." George said. It was silent until Punz started sneezing. "Who has a- Achoo! Dyed sheep as a- Achoo! As a pet!?" He yelled. 

"You mean Friend?" Ghostbur asked. "Punz... You never said you were allergic to sheep." Bad said. "It's not the sheep... IT'S THE DYE- ACHOO!" He said, sneezing more. Stress went over and pulled Punz away from Friend and began to mother over him. "Doc, do you have those allergy pills from 3 seasons ago still?" She asked. "I do. Here." Doc said, handing her one. "Open- Ah!" She said, making Punz take the pill. "Don't worry, I'll make an epipen for him after this." Doc said whenshe looked at him.

"Did we just witness an adoption?" Tommy asked. "Yup! Well, meeting adjourned everyone. Sign up sheet will be on the bulletin board on the side of Smile Cafe." X said. (Yes! We have a name for the bakery now! And they make coffees now! :D) The server nodded while Yogurt and Fundy were allowed to stay by Dream in the safe house Jevin and Wels made for those who hadn't slept and needed to escape the mobs. Yogurt curled up with Dream's left side while Fundy curled up on his right. 

Both fell asleep with their heads over Dream's still beating heart. 

Chapter Text

HICCUP 

Dream covered his mouth as Yogurt shot up and made sure his mama was ok. "You ok!?" He gasped, patting Dream's face and forehead. "I'm ok, kit... just have some hiccups." Dream said, hiccuping more. Each hiccup made Zombie glitch and teleport somewhere in the room. Why? I dunno. No one really does. "Dream!" Zombie huffed as they fell in a resting chair nest to their bed. "Sor- Hic- Sorry!" Dream said, hiccuping more. 

Fundy managed to calm Dream's hiccups by making him drink awkward potions, but they taste terrible. Like... making a lemon smoothie with tart lemonade, sour lemons and hot sauce... Yeah... Ick... 

When Dream's watch party for the day came to retrieve him, Stress cooed at the sight of Fundy hugging Dream. "Dreamie... Dear, Doc said you can leave today." She said. "Five more minutes..." Dream huffed, holding his foxes closer. Yogurt giggled and kissed Dream's face. "Mama... I have to get to my combat lessons with Auntie Falsie..." Yogurt squeaked. "Don't wanna." Dream sniffled. "Dream... I'll take Yogurt... You go and get used to having that hole in your chest." Fundy grumbled.

And this is how Dream ended up hiccuping while Stress and Punz made him walk to the community sheep pen. Punz sneezed as they passed the dyed sheep. "You know... We really need to get you those allergy meds..." Stress hummed, handing Punz a handkerchief she had made for him the night prior. "Man... I hate my allergies..." Punz sniffled, earning a small snort from Dream. "What?" Punz huffed. "Nothing... You just remind me of Yogurt whenever he rolls around in flowers for too long... His eyes water up while he sneezes so much that he reminds me of a little puppy." Dream hummed.

"Aw... He's already doing the motherly hum." Stress said. "Huh?" Dream sounded, jumping when a sheep booped his side with its nose. "Shirley~! Hi, baby!" Dream said, cupping the sheep's head and scratching their face. Shirley baa-ed and blinked at Dream in a happy way. "I missed you too~ Now, why don't we shear you and your pals, hm?" Dream hummed. Punz and Stress watched as Dream babied the sheep and lambs before he had to separate them. They offered to help, but Dream waved them away and told them they'd need to help him shear the sheep. 

"Punz... You get the undyed ones." Dream said, pointing to the organized pen. The blue eyed blond sighed and nodded, leaving Stress with her baby. "How are you feeling right now, dear?" She asked, noticing Dream's shortness of breath. "I've never appreciated how much work goes into cheering these guys up." He panted out. Stress smiled and sat Dream down by the watering trough and ruffled his hair. 

"Rest. I'll shear the babies." She said. "Oh, mumma, you don't have too..." Dream said. "Dream... You are hurt. You are to rest because I said so." Stress said. Dream whined, making the woman sigh. "How about I move some of the smaller sheeps towards you so you can shear them too, hm?" (My mom just said I should try on fake nails... I hate them. Great colors, but I need to relearn how to use my hands again...) Dream nodded and allowed Stress to section off the small sheep, who all hopped over to Dream.

The three finished with the sheep and allowed Dream to go home with the wool. After they had told Fundy and Yogurt. Yogurt wanted to drop his lesson and help his mama home, and so did Fundy, but Dream just waved them back to their day. "I will be fine. You take care of Yogurt, and you make sure you can hold a sword before nightfall young man." Dream said. "But... You don't use a sword mama...." Yogurt said. 

"True... But I did use one for when I was learning to defend myself." Dream said. "I see you have wool... Making anything with it by any chance?" Fundy hummed. "Yes! Yarn! For a blanket so Yogurt doesn't get cold in case we don't get enough firewood this year..." Dream said. Fundy hugged the other close and hummed. "You worry too much..." He said. 

False squat down to Yogurt's level and asked "Are those two like together yet?" When Yogurt shook his head she nodded and insturcted the boy to strike the wooden pole she had in the ground. All while messaging everyone about their status.

<Falsesymmetry: So uh Dream and Fundy aren't together yet>

<Sapnap: The what>

<Georgenotfound: xd and me arent either...>

<Sapnap: no one asked>

<BdoubleO100: Sapnap, be nice or so help me, I will make you clean Lulu's stall>

<BdoubleO100: without a mask on a very hot day>

<Tango: D:>

<ImpulseSV: Not the horse stall threat!>

<Grian: Now, that's a moment to play the funeral march song.>

<GoodtimeswithScar: *Plays the sad song meant for the dead*>

<Dream: wha?>

The next day while the Fundywastaken household were making yarn, the rest of the server grouped together to make 'Operation Cupid's Pie'... Scar came up with the name. Don't question it. But the plan was simple! Make Grian and Scar show them the perks of love... Unfrotuneately, Grian objected to this plan. Thankfully! The vote was a majority rule in favor of the plan! 

Which leads us to now... With Scar and Grian holding hands while they visited the family. "How have you guys been?" Scar asked, taking the mug of chorus fruit tea Dream offered. Scar took a sip and shook. "Wow! That is spicy!" He said, handing his mug to Grian so he can fan his mouth. Dream laughed slightly at Scar's actions before he stirred in some honey. "I'm sorry..." Dream said, letting Yogurt take a huge gulp of his own tea. "You good there, Yogurt?" Grian asked. 

The little one nodded and swallowed. "Mhm! Mama makes the best chorus fruit tea!" Yogurt giggled. "That's because I stir in honey, silly." Dream said, booping his son's nose. "Honey?" Scar asked, going to take another sip of his un-adapted tea. Grian took Scar's mug and handed him his own. "Mine had sugar in it... It's still a bit spicy, but it's more sweet than spicy now." Grian said. "Aw..." Scar sniffled. "You two should get married." Fundy said from the redstone bits and bobs in the corner of their little terraium shack. "Ah! That's why we-" Scar started before Grian shot him a look he knew all too well.

The look of 'I-swear-to-the-watchers-above-I-will-punt-kick-you-to-the-sun-if-you-blow-this' "Ah- Nevermind... Wrong person..." Scar said, sipping the tea mug in his hands. "Mhm... Well, feel free to hang out as long as you like, you two." Dream said. "Ooh! Mama! Can you teach me how to do that knotty thingamabob you do with the yarn we made?" Yogurt asked. "You mean crochet?" Dream asked, earning an eager nod from the smaller.

"Can I learn too?" Scar sheepishly asked "Of course! Come on you two. Grian you don't mind, do you?" Dream asked. "Nope! You take him!" Grian said, waving his hands everywhere. "And have you stay with Fundy? No way... C'mon G..." Dream said. Grian sighed and did so. Dream lead them to his and Fundy's shared room and got out the little crochet basket he had made from under his side of the bed. 

The three watched as Dream made one simple ball of red yarm transform into a red blanket. The youngest let out a shocked gasp when Dream dropped the blanket on him. "Mama!" Yogurt giggled. "How? How in the universe did that ball of yarn become that?" Scar asked. "A series of loops and patience." Dream said. "Now, your turns!" He said, summoning three extra crochet needles. 

The three groan and ugh-ed when he handed them their needle. "Don't worry... I'll help you." Dream said.  Turns out, they didn't have the patience for crochet. Yogurt stopped after loop 3, Scar made it to row 2, and Grian... Didn't even pick up his needle after Dream gave it to him. Dream laughed at each of their attempts and then sighed. "Maybe I should crochet, and you guys just advertise, hm?" Dream said, loving their nods. "Dream... I- I gotta do, you know things." Grian said, playing with his eyes. "Ah... Here..." Dream said, handing Grian a key to a closet. "You'll have privacy there." Dream said.

The other took the key gratefully and left Scar and Yogurt to interrogate him. "Mama, where is uncie Grian goin'?" Yogurt sniffled. "He's got some mind stuff to do." Dream said, letting Yogurt crawl off the bed and run to his father. "Soo... Are you and Fundy ever going to get married!?" Scar blurted put, since Grian was in his watcher palace. 

"Scar... I-" Dream huffed, sighing as he held his cheeks. "I dunno if marriage is a good idea for us... And besides, we're still in the 'what are we' stage.." Dream said. "I remember that stage... Grian and I were in season 7 when that stage came about. We didn't know if we were enemies or best buds... We eventually settled on confused idiots." Scar said. "I'm guessing season 8 was when you guys were official?" Dream hummed. "Mmm Nope! Third life was the 'ok, I think I like you, not sure you do' stage, then last life was 'I love you, but stay away unless you need something' stage... 100 hours was 'I literally can't go a minute without making sure you're ok' and 'Oh my fried chicken! You are not ok!' stages... Then season 8 rolled by and we were at 'might as well just say we're a couple at this point' stage... Now we are one! Sorta..." Scar ranted.

"Anyway, what about you and fun of the dee?" Scar hummed. "Uh... Well we competed in an MCC, he asked me out, we had one date and he proposed... Then George objected to my wedding and I stupidly ran after him! Now we're here... With a child... Oh my god, I'm unofficially married to him, am I? Oh no... Now I have a pshycopath as a father-in-law and a fish for a mother-in-law! Not to mention his dad's family!" Dream rambled. Scar placed his hands on Dream's shoulders and snapped him back to reality.

"Hey, just trust your gut. If it says 'Fundy is my husband and Yogurt's my baby.' then go with it. Ok? It's like building a custom tree." Scar said. "I heard Grian blew up the one you made?" Dream said. "It was a commission from Mumbo during their tree war... I was sad when he blew it up..." Scar said. "Sorry..." Dream hummed.

That night at dinner, Dream asked the question! "Fundy... What are we?" He asked. "I was hoping you were my husband and Yogurt was my son..." Fundy said, staring at Dream. The blond blushed and hid his face in his hoodie. "Shouldn't we have a ceremony at least before we label ourselves as husbands...." He whined, making the two foxes at the table squeak out laughs.

Chapter Text

<iJevin: Anyone up for a sunrise meditation session?>

<Dream: A wat?>

<ImpulseSV: Sunrise meditation>

<Tango: its like relaxing while doing yoga>

<MumboJumbo: mmm yogurt>

<BdoubleO100: not yogurt>

<Dream: I'm in!>

<ZombieCleo: Sure!>

<Technoblade: Sure!>

<Xisumavoid: oh yeah... gotta fix you two still>

<Georgenotfound: go to sleep or let me sleep Tubbo>

<Tubbo_: no>

Tubbo_ was slain by Georgenotfound using [GogSWORDia]

<Ranboo: To be fair... he did warn>

<Tommyinnit: why did Tubbo respawn on me?>

<Dream: What kind of name is that?>

<Hannahxxrose: its for anyone, right?>

<iJevin: yup! See you guys at GOAT hill!>

<Skeppy: wait... is that the hand made hill Doc made to have a goat head careved in the side?>

<Geminitay: Yes>

<Skeppy: oh!>

<Sapnap: not gonna ask why you spelled carving that way>

Dream quickly got dressed and placed a kiss on Fundy's cheek. "Be back soon, dear." He said before throwing his pastel lime green zip-up hoodie over his shoulders and rushing to get his converse and axe. You never know when you need an axe! He hopped out from the opening and landing in the lake. "Phew... Ok..." He said. 

On his way there, he saw Zombie struggling to move. He walked over and smiled. "Hey." He said, spooking the merged players. "Wha!? Dream! Don't go scaring us like that!" They said. "Sorry... Just wanted to make sure you were ok." Dream said. "We're as ok as two players combined in one body can be..." They said. "Would you like some help?" Dream asked. "How can you help us?" Zombie teased. "Experience." The blond hummed. The other blinked at Dream, which prompted him to chuckle. "So. which of you is observant? That's the person you want in control of the legs. They'll notice things before the other does. But there will be times where the other will notice something before the leg controller will. But, it takes time." Dream hummed.

"Techno, you take the arms." Zombie whispered. "No, I want the legs!" they kept whispering. Dream smiled and hugged the glitched. "How did you and George do it so seamlessly?" they asked. "Patience... Try this. Techno, you control the legs and Cleo, you stay on standby in case Techno misses something. Ok?" Dream said, holding Zombie's arms. "You two got this. Now, let's get to that meditation." Dream said.

They were late. Kinda... Jevin, Gem, Bad, and Skeppy were there already. Gem was already meditating while Jevin tried to help Sapnap's parents relax. "Ah! Dream! ZombieTechno! Nice to see you two here. You're a little late, the sun is just breaching the horizon, but no worries. Have you done something like this before?" Jevin asked. "Does sleeping in a tree count?" Dream asked. "No... But don't worry. Meditation is like an art. But for now, pick a spot and sit, kay?" Jevin said. 

Hermit meditation was different from normal meditation. It was a way for hermits to open their minds and push themselves back into the bounds of reality. A way to separate their builds from their other aspects of themselves... Or as Scar puts it: 'Jevin's excuse to watch the sun rise up from the horizon.' Zombie rushed over to a spot in the middle and pat at the spot next to them. "ok..." Dream said, going next to them. Once Jeving got Skeppy and Bad in a semi-empty headspace, he went to turn towards Dream and Zombie, jumping when he saw Dream in a pretzel sitting position and his eyes closed. Zombie attempted to copy but they ended up just sitting cross legged and smiled at Jevin.

The slime smiled and sat down, starting his meditation. The group didn't notice Grian had plopped an end crystal near them. They didn't even noticed until Zombie made a gasp. Jevon opened his eyes and stared. Not at the looming threat, but at how Dream was being healed by the crystal. His wings were mending themselves together as well as his shard wound. 

Dream didn't even feel this. That man was just floating in his own sea of peace with his mind. Even Nightmare was having a blast in tranquility! Zombie was so entranced, they didn't even notice their code start to unravel itself and repair itself. When Cleo and Techno fell to the sides where Zombie once were, both gasped and cheered. Dream snapped out of his tranquil slumber (he was snoring somewhat) and looked to see Techno and Cleo as themselves. "You two ok?" Dream asked. 

"we're-" They got out before the end crystal blew up.

iJevin blew up

Skeppy blew up

Badboyhalo blew up

Geminitay blew up

ZombieCleo blew up

<Dream: How are we not dead?>

<Technoblade: Not even close>

<Dream: Techno... Your health status says 1.5 hp...>

<Dream: THATS PRETTY CLOSE>

<Xisumavoid: Did the server begin to run far more smoothly now?>

<Georgenotfound: Dream what did you do?>

<Dream: I dunno>

<iJevin: He heals with end crystals!>

<Geminitay: who put an explosive there?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: this spells Grian>

<Grian: exCUSE me?>

<ImpuleSV: Everyone get your popcorn, the lovers are at it again.>

Dream smiled as he looked at his wing and at his 'rival'. "So... How was Auntie Cleo?" Dream asked. "Dream... Her mind is too much." Techno said. "Oh, c'mon... Techno, Cleo can't be that bad." Dream said. "You wanna watch how she makes those armor stands look alive? At 5 in the morning running off of 12 minutes of sleep?" Techno said. "Ah... At least your voices were nice and behaved." Dream said. "That's cause they simp for you and are terrified to see what havoc you'd ensue on me if they did misbehave." Techno said.

"Aw... I love you all too." Dream cooed, squishing Techno's face before he flew off to go check on the server. "Weirdo..." Techno huffed.

Chapter Text

George stared at the walking, talking reflection of himself with a raised eyebrow. "Why do you look like me?" They said. "I could ask the same thing." George huffed. Dream and his godly counterpart watched from their spots at Smile Cafe. "Exdee... Are you gonna say somethin'?" Dream asked, crunching away at the ice cup he had gotten from his own bakery. "You want me to interfere with HD? Do you want me dead?" Exdee said. 

"I dunno, figured your ex would be reasonable..." Dream hummed, ignoring his brother's squawks and chewing more ice. "He's not my ex! We weren't really anything anyway!" Exdee groaned. "Mhm, and you didn't have a one night stand with a demon..." Dream said. "He/They what?" George and HD asked, looking at Dream. "Should've kept that one to myself...." Dream said, looking away. 

"Don't shut up on me now, Dream. Tell me!" George huffed, going to chase the other. Dream laughed as George chased him, climbing up to the roof of his bakery where he knew George wasn't crazy enough to follow. Instead, George simply glared at Dream from the floor before he pulled out some scaffolding. "Shit!" Dream yelled, scrambling to escape the wild Gogy chasing him. "Big Bro! Help me! Get your husband!" Dream yelled. "Not his husband!" George yelled in a crazed manner, chasing Dream through Cub's Spawner shop and Scar's Mob shop. 

Back with Exdee and HD, let's say the two had the most awkward silence that could've be held between two gods. Very uncomfortable for both of them. "So..." HD hummed. "Hm?" Exdee obliviously hummed back, looking at the blue themed god with a very opaque blue veil over their eyes. "Why was I not informed that your brother's SMP was taken down?" They said. "That was Kristen's job to inform you all." Exdee said. "You're the creator..." HD said. "To be fair... I'm no more of religious figure at this point..." Exdee said, watching their brother trip and tumble into Grian's, Sapnap's, and Bdubs' explosive shop crater. 

HD sighed and looked at the scene around them. "I must say... This is far more peaceful than that SMP was..." HD said. "That's because the demon possessing my baby brother is behavingunder the watch of two of its kind." Exdee growled. "Demon? Exdee, those do not exist..." HD said. "No... But Watchers do... And they're much like demons when not observed." Exdee grumbled, crossing their arms to contain his anger. HD noticed this and chuckled. "You never were great at hiding emotions..." they joked. 

"You don't have to watch your younger brother be eaten alive by something he can't control... You don't have to idly stand by while he slowly develops his hybrid side that should've been developed already. You didn't have to watch as a woman simply held him as treasure while neglecting their well being. You didn't have to hold back your wrath and wait for your brother to take matters in his own hands... HD... You never had to hold back tears like did..." Exdee said. "I understand, Exdee. I do. I'll never understand the emotions you hold inside of you... But... I do understand your wrath." HD said.

"You haven't seen my wrath yet." Exdee said. "Oh? Was that not your wrath of what happened to Jschlatt?" HD said. "No... Actually, that was Drista being her chaotic self." Exdee said. "My... If your baby sister can cause a heart attack... Who knows what you and your little brothers can do..." HD said. "I have a vague feeling I know..." Exdee said, walking to go get George so they can get Marshal. HD followed and saw the brunette and other blond covered in soot. 

"Why are you two like this?" Exdee huffed, waving their hand to clean them off. Dream scrunched his nose at this while George huffed. "We're not children, Ex." George said. "I mean... If we get technical... Compared to Exdee, we are literally fetuses." Dream hummed. "To be fair... Dream you would be my age if you count the time you were in your egg." Exdee hummed. "Again, remind me how you're related." HD said. 

"HD... That's a complicated matter..." Exdee said. Dream smiled at HD and then spoke up. "I can tell you a tiny bit... But Big brother, Exdee, has most of the story..." Dream said, climbing out from the crater and beginning to walk home. "Oi! I'm comin' with!" George huffed, ignoring Exdee's calls for them to go get Marshal. "Great... Now my spouse is going to learn how we became related..." Exdee said. "It's a good story when you think about it!" Dream said, hopping more than walking. "You and your ADHD walk." George laughed. "It's not an ADHD walk... It's me trying not to step on my tail and trip myself into death." Dream huffed, hopping more to get over an extra tall wall that was slapped in the middle of the shopping district to hide a spoiler. 

Of course, Dream didn't care about spoilers! He just went through places that made it quicker to get home, and if a spoiler was there, he made sure to not look. He had a theory that everyone's eyes were basically cameras and something was watching their lives. Oh how right he was.... That something was us. 

"Why do you mortals hide what you create from each other?" HD asked. "We like surprises." George huffed. "Gogy... Be nice to them. That's the collector." Dream said, scaling the other wall and making HD stop in his tracks. "How did you know?" He asked. "He was the admin connected to me... So he knows what I allowed him to know. And that was who was the collector, creator, and protector were." Exdee hummed, watching as Dream got himself stuck. 

"help..." Dream whimpered, giving up on trying to wiggle off. HD managed to float up and pull the other off. "You had wings... Why did you not use them?" HD asked. "I don't like using them often after Puffy cut them up." Dream sniffled. "HD, set him dow- And you're gonna carry him... ok!" Exdee said, putting their hands up in the air in surrender. 

This led to HD and Exdee holding their mortals while Dream directed them to taken his home. After they got inside Dream's terraium, the blond ran to a small rock formation and dived head-first into a moss pile in the middle, taking out the family album. "Aha!" Dream gasped, climbing out and shaking the moss off him. "He's like a puppy..." HD said. "Hey, he's already taken." Exdee said. "Taken?" HD asked. "He has a spouse..." George rolled his eyes. "George, darling, muffincake, apple-of-my-eye... Sleepy pie... Please stop sassing GeorgeHD." Exdee said- No begged. HD was surprised a mortal had managed to get the DreamXD to beg.

Dream sat on the ground and opened the book, waving the group, pointing to a photo of his smaller self looking at the camera in a confused way. The camera was pointed in a way where you saw Dream's little nose and eyes and the roof above him. "Ah, I remember that day... The only day Puffy actually cared for you before she left for the sea again." Exdee said, earning a glare from Dream. "Tell the story before this picture, please..." Dream said. 

"Alright... Where to start... The beginning... Which is how I was around." Exdee starts.

~~~

"Welcome to the void, DreamXD. You have a purpose here, and everywhere... You are here to help create the End, our home." A voice said. "The End? Home?" Exdee yawned. "Yes. Now, you must begin your work, little one. I will help you." They said, right as Exdee looked up. "Pretty!" Exdee giggled. "Why thank you." They said. It was the ender dragon, but not really? You know how when you beat the ender dragon, the body levitates and eplodes with a purple glow? Yeah... That's all there was where the voice came from. The big ball of purple light. "I have a request, darling... I need a body in order to help." They said. "how?" Exdee asked. "Think of what you want me to look like, and that will be my body." they said.

~~~

"And then we found out I made the body female! And that meant popping out eggs... I felt so terrible I made the endermen to help protect them and the egg... Which in theory means I'm Dream's dad? But they self reproduce... So we chose brother... Since they made me before Dream... Then Tom, then Drista! Now we have no idea who the next egg is." Exdee said. "Grian has an egg." Dream said offhandedly. "HE HAS THE EGG!? WHERE IS HE!?" Exdee yelled. "His base is by Scar's... In the water." George said, jumping when Exdee teleported out like how they do the apparition in Harry Potter. "Man... I wanna do that..." George huffed. "I mean... With enough exposure to his-" HD started only to see Dream waved his hands and point to Yogurt's open window. 

"Mama!" Yogurt yelled, making Dream throw the album and climb through the window. "YOGURT!?" Dream yelled, seeing his son sniffling and holding his hand. The blond ran forth and cupped his son's face, wiping his teary eyes. "Oh, baby... What happened?" Dream asked, gingerly holding Yogurt's hand. "I- I did a stupid, mama... I closed my toy chest's lid on my hand..." Yogurt hiccuped, trying to hold back his sobs. "Oh, darling... Come here..." Dream said, scooping his son up while being mindful of his hand. "Let's get some ice and cool that hand off, yeah?" Dream said, carrying his son to their kitchen and placing the boy on the counter and getting some ice out from their ice box (a light blue shulker box that Fundy managed to rig up to be freezing cold). He broke the ice block into smaller bits before placing it in a cloth and placing it on Yogurt's hand. 

"You are very good with children." HD said, making Dream jump, pull Yogurt to his chest to protect him out of instinct, and growl at the 'threat'. HD chuckled and show he was not a threat. "Dream, you ok? I heard a growl." George said, rushing over. "Nothing... Just mistook HD as a threat..." Dream said, smoothing Yogurt's nest of hair while the boy began to cry. George moved forward, which Dream allowed, and went to comfort Yogurt. 

HD watched as the two cared for the boy. You'd mistake them as his parents if you didn't take into fact that Yogurt was a fox shifter. Dream made a purr only mothers would know to soothe Yogurt, and it worked. The boy began to calm down and yawn. "Better, baby?" Dream asked. Yogurt nodded and held the ice cloth bag. "Now, we gotta keep that on your hand... How about we watch Uncle Sapnap and Uncle Bdubs blow stuff up while we rest that hand, hm?" Dream said, kissing Yogurt's hair.

"Ok, mama... And we get to bring Uncle Gogy too, right?" He asked. "George?" Dream asked. "I will join you two once I get Marshal. He's said to transform today!" George said. "You better get going then!" Dream teased. "So... Person who scared mama... Who you?" Yogurt grumbled, hiding in Dream's chest more. "Gods, I'm so happy I'm a male and don't have breasts..." Dream said, looking at his son. "My name is GeorgeHD. But Most just call me HD." He said. 

"Mhm..." Yogurt sniffled. "You must forgive him, HD... He's usually happy, but he's in pain, so he's a little grumpy, hm?" Dream said, making Yogurt nod. "New uncie... Goodie!" Yogurt giggled, nuzzling Dream. 

Chapter Text

“Where is my- Found it!” Scar yelled, scaring the bejeebus out of Grian. “What was it!?” Grian huffed, looking to see Scar holding one of his movement crystals that Jellie stole and hid. “I found OPPA!” Scar yelled. OPPA stood for: One Person’s Personal Advancement… Yeah, Grian had no clue why Scar named it that when all it did was make a certain attribute of oneself more… Useful? He doesn’t know, all he knows is that Scar always calls something about him useless.

“Scar… You don’t need those things…” Grian said. “No, no… I do… Grian, I can’t control my vex side without these.” Scar said. “I’m sure you can with patience,” Grian said. “Uh-huh, says the potentially eternity old beauty in front of me.” Scar said before he covers his mouth. “I’m sorry….” He said, seeing Grian’s shocked face. 

“You think I’m a beauty?” Grian teased. “So you’re not gonna deny you’re old?” Scar shot back. “Age is irrelevant when beauty is involved,” Grian said, making Scar hum. Jellie made a noise of complaint with the two and yowled for their attention. “Ok, ok, girl… I’ll feed ya, hold on..” Scar said, picking her up and kissing her head. Grian watched as Jellie blinked at Scar and flicked her tail while he walked to where her food was.

“Jellie! You haven’t touched your breakfast…” Scar said, seeing the full bowl. She blinked sleepily at Scar and placed her right paw on his nose. “Aw… She’s sensing something with you… I’ll leave you two… Oh my god!” Grian said, turning to see a seething Exdee behind him.

“Where is it?” the god growled. “Where is what?” Grian asked. “The egg from season 8. Where. Is. It?” Exdee said. “Next to my bed?” Grian questioned back before he was instructed to show the god where. Scar watched with Jellie as the already temperamental god held his base-mate at lightning point. 

Grian opened his bedroom door and allowed Exdee to grab the egg and examine it. “So… What’s wrong with the egg?” Grian asked, trying to keep a conversation with the other. “I need to make sure the code for this little one isn’t corrupted… I put in too much work to create many versions of the end. I do not want it to be wasted.” Exdee said, turning the egg so the fatter side was on top. “Good news, the code is fine!” Exdee said, picking up some of George’s speech-isms. “Bad news?” Grian asked. “You’re about to have a baby god on your hands. And by the looks of it, they’re a reincarnation of a fallen god HD and I knew.” Exdee said.

~~~

“WHAT!?” Dream yelled when he learned that the egg was housing the newest god. The whole server was currently gathered around a community bonfire event Tommy and Tubbo host. “Hold on… Gods can die?” Sapnap asked. “You heard me Dream, and yes, Sapnap. It is difficult for us to die, but it is possible… With the final blow having to be given by a god.” Exdee said, looking at HD, whose face was hidden by the veil.

“Of course… Hopefully, he won’t lose control… Like last time.” HD said, earning a glare from Exdee. “We do not talk of his mistake… It was an honest and simple one that we could’ve fixed without causing a panic.” Exdee said, holding a strangely orange crystal similar to the one around HD’s neck. “I did not sound the alarm… You did.” HD said, causing Dream and Tom to get in between the two. “Ok… So this little one is a reincarnation… We can work with that. Techno will help with any voices they may have, Sapnap with combat, and Grian, Pearl and I will help with magic, ok?” Dream said. “Might wanna switch out Sapnap for False…” HD said. 

“Why? I can do it, really!” Sapnap said. “Sapnap… You can not train this one in combat…” Exdee said. “Why not!” Sapnap yelled, turning towards Exdee. Dream pieced together the unspoken bits Exdee and HD are leaving out. “Sapnap… This god is connected to you.” Dream said.

“Which means?” X asked. “A connected god and mortal work like… Doppelgangers… Maybe twins at most. They look the same, have the same mannerisms almost, and there is only small differences to tell them apart.” Tom said. “Take me, Tom, and Ex for example. Tom and I are connected to Exdee because we hatched from a sibling code that stemmed from himself. Same with HD. Somehow, Exdee managed to weave in one of George’s ancestor's code into HD’s egg, causing him and George to become connected. Sapnap now has his own.” Dream said. 

“What about Drista and your girl version?” Tommy asked. “Well, the girl version was me messing with a clone I made of Dream… I wanted to see if I could make a girl him. And I did! Before she ran off the guy Dream murdered…” Exdee said. “No no… Nightmare did… I got ran over by minecart.” Dream said. 

“Say, Nightmare’s been awfully quiet recently…” George said. “Because I’m on vacation, goggles. Want me to return? I will.” Nightmare sassed, making Dream cover his mouth and hit his head. “Warn me next time!” He said, shaking his head. “So… When is this egg hatching?” Scar asked. “In 6 hours. It’s best to take the egg outside, that way, nothing of value will be damaged, in case of unexpected circumstances…” Exdee said. 

“6 hours? That’s just after sunrise…” Grian said. “Dee, can you go bring the egg to us, please?” George asked, holding Exdee’s hand. The god nodded while HD simmered in anger. What? HD may have had a thing for Exdee… Dream laughed slightly at HD’s reaction and smiled to them. “It’s ok…Everything will be ok.” Dream said.

~~~

6 hours later of the whole server just waiting for that first crack to appear on the egg… And out popped a little head that looked oddly like Sapnap! Just with black circles around their orange eyes and the snaggle teeth that poked out from their little mouth. Oh! And the tiny panda ears and tail! 

“Aw… He’s so cute!” Gem squealed. The baby sneezed out a small puff of smoke and smiled when Exdee picked them out from their egg. “Hi, Pvp… Of course… We can’t really call you that, since you are here to take the place of PandasPVP…” Exdee hummed. “Sap, isn’t that your old name?” Dream asked. “No, My old name was just pandas cause Bad couldn’t figure out a name at the time and I always found more than one panda.” Sapnap said.

Exdee handed Grian Pvp when the bab started to make grabby hands towards the blondie. “Oh… Uh…” Grian said, cradling the little one while they snuggled closely to Grian and made him their mama. Did that make Scar a dad or uncle? “Oh my gosh! I never babyproofed the base!” Scar yelled, flying off with a rocket towards their shared base. “Scar!” Grian yelled before sighing. “We haven’t finished Scar-proofing the base…” he sighed. HD hummed and played with Pvp’s hair. “May I join you? Pvp can be a handful once he learns how to scale walls and ceilings like a spider.” HD hummed, making Grian stare at him. “I have a demon for a child, don’t I?” Grian asked. “Maybe.” HD said.

~~~

<Sapnap: Anyone up to go to the end?>

<Cubfan135: Sure>

<Georgenotfound: yea>

<Falsesymmetry: im down>

<Sapnap: Dream, you down?>

<Dream: Wha>

<Dream: why am i being asked?>

<Sapnap: You’re the only one who hasn’t been besides the kids.>

<Dream: oh>

<Dream: sure!>

Dream smiled as he grabbed his axe and shield. “Mama? Where you going?” Yogurt asked. “I got invited to go on an adventure.” Dream said. “Ooh! Can I go? You promised…” Yogurt whined. “You have a point, dear…” Dream said, kneeling down to Yogurt’s level. Despite the boy almost being 10 in fox years, he still only made it to Dream’s knees. He pets the little one’s head softly. “I would take you as I promised… But this one is too dangerous… And I haven't really taught you how to defend yourself against mobs yet…” Dream said. “I can learn, mama!” Yogurt said, making Dream smile.

“I know, baby… But for now, stay with papa… It is his day with you after all.” Dream said. “But… Tech stuff is confusing, mama…” Yogurt said. “Well.. I do tech stuff too…” Dream said. “Yeah… But you make it cool!” Yogurt said. “Well, my tech stuff and your father’s is almost the same! He’s just on the more world-breaking side.” Dream said. “Huh?” Yogurt asked. 

“He makes impossible things possible here.” Dream said, ushering the younger to Fundy. “I’ll be back later today, ok?” Dream said, kissing the fox’s cheek. Fundy jumped at the sudden move of affection and placed a hand where Dream kissed as the blond walked away. Dream joined up with the end busting team that consisted of: Sapnap, Punz, Cub, False, George, and Impulse. “Hey, you guys ready for the end?” Dream asked, smiling.

Dear lord was he not, but he didn’t know that yet!

Chapter Text

The group made their way to the end, with False leading the way since she had been to the end about 5 times by now. “So… Sapnap? How does it feel to have a god look like you now?” Impulse asked. Sapnap shrugged and rubbed his arm. “I feel like I should have an indicator to say ‘hey, this is sapnap, not pandas’... You know?” Sapnap said. “Oh, I know that feeling, Pandas…” Dream said. “Mhm…” Sapnap huffed. “Hey, remember that time we met Exdee and I dyed my hair neon green?” Dream asked. “I do.” George said. “You looked like a nuclear slime fell on you and you said ‘sure, this is fine!’ and went along with your day.” Sapnap said. “But that was how people knew me from Dee!” Dream said. 

“We’re almost there, guys! Dream, get ready.” False said. Dream nodded and ignored Nightmare yelling at him to not go through the portal. “You guys go ahead, I need to double-check everything.” Dream said, seeing everyone nod besides George and Sap. “We’ll catch up.” George said, waving to the other hermits. “We’ll wait by the portal for you three!” False said, earning a nod from Sapnap. “Ok!” Sanap said.

“We’re gonna get stuck in the end. Don’t go. They’re going to find me and kill you!” Nightmare yelled, causing Dream to hold his head again. “Hey, I miss the end.” Dream argued. “Nightmare… Stop terrorizing Dream. We’ll be right beside you two." Sapnap said. "You've never met an ender watcher! They're fucking rats!" Nightmare yelled. Dream sighed and looked at Sap. “Nightmare. We’re gonna protect you and Dream…Even if I’d like to punt you into the sun, Nightmare.” Sapnap said, earning a smack from George. 

“C’mon. We’re holding the others up.” George said, pulling the two to meet up with the other 4. “Y’all good?” Punz asked, mimicking Sapnap’s ‘Texan’ accent. “I don’t sound like that.” Sapnap huffed. “Yes you do! George, remember how Sap spoke after he drank 17 buckets of lava straight?” Punz said. “Leave me outta this…” George said.

The two bickered for about 5 - 10 minutes before False clapped her hands and called for the boys’ attention. Like a teacher trying to corral the toddles into learning how to flip a sword by its handle. (News flash, each and every one of them got distracted.) “Boys! Listen up, please! Now I know you’ve all been to the end in one way, shape, or form, but I’d like to stress the fact that our end is much more different than your usual end now. Since Dream and Xisuma are classified as the admins, the end has taken the form of… A utopia of danger.” She said. “Does that mean it looks pretty?” Sapnap asked. False sighed and facepalmed. “Of course, he’d pick up some of Bdubs’ and Scar’s traits while hanging around them…” She whispered. 

“Any who! Who’s ready for the end?” Impulse said, earning a cheer and affirmation from everyone but Sap and Punz. The two were busy punching each other in a playful manner. “Sap, Punz.” Dream said, getting their attention. “Hm?” Punz asked. “Are you guys ready for the end?” George said in that slow way that made each word into a sentence. “I am! He is too!” Sap said for the both of them.

“Now I know how Karl feels…” Punz said. “Oh no… You know how Sapnap feels. Karl is the mother, and mothers have more authority than the gods.” Dream said. “Does that mean George is a mother and you too?” Cub asked. “Yes. Why else do you think Fundy’s whiskers are trimmed and even?” Dream said. “I thought Yogurt had something to do with that..” Cub said. “Nope, all me.” Dream hummed, ushering the group to the portal. 

False counted to 3 and sighed when Sap, Dream and George jumped inside. Punz slipped inside when he was trying to readjust his hoodie. The hermits sighed and hopped in after the four. 

~~~

Sapnap yelped when he looked at Dream. “You’re doing that MCC thing again!” the fireboy yelled, making everyone else gasp. “⍑⚍⍑? ∴ᔑ╎ℸ ̣ , ∴⍑ᔑℸ ̣?” Dream asked, earning a bunch of confused looks from the group, so he signed what he said. Which was him shaking his hand in a horizontal pattern with his palms up. “What? What’d you mean what? You’re eyes and purple!” Sapnap yelled. “╎ ℸ ̣ 𝙹ꖎ↸ ||𝙹⚍ ℸ ̣ ⍑╎ᓭ ∴𝙹⚍ꖎ↸ ⍑ᔑ!¡!¡ᒷリ, ᓭℸ ̣ ⚍!¡╎↸…” Nightmare huffed, making the other’s make the same face again. This prompted Dream’s… Body? To start walking towards the bridge that had been made and to the already activated home portal. “Guess he’s going home?” Cub asked. “You’d want to go home too if your friends can’t understand you and fear you.” Impulse said. “C’mon… Let’s keep him company.” False said.

The others followed Dream and sighed as he got close to the portal. Sapnap was kind of happy since there were so many new plants in the end and new materials. “Make sure Beckerson brushes his teeth, ok?” Sapnap said to Dream, who nodded and smiled. “Sorry your trip was bad.” Punz said, earning a fond shake of the head and a pat to his cheek. The blonde stepped into the portal… And didn’t go home. He didn’t go anywhere! WHY IS THE END BROKEN!? “Uh… That’s not supposed to happen…” False said. “You don’t say!?” Punz said in a voice that wavered in octaves. “Don’t give me that tone, young man… I may be older, but I can kick your butt from Christmas to Easter.” False said, earning a cheer from Impulse. 

“Whoo! Go Team STAR!” he said. “Hold on, Dream… I’ll get Grian and see what I can do, ok? George, you’re like the backup for Dream if he goes missing or somethin’, can you try to see what’s causing him to stay here?” Sapnap said. “Now why does your brain work when we’re not hunting him for a bet?” George asked. “Just do the damn thing!” Sapnap yelled. 

“Swear jar.” Cub reminded. “ᓭ⍑╎ℸ ̣ , ╎ 𝙹∴ᒷ ℸ ̣ ⍑ᒷ ᓭ∴ᒷᔑ∷ ⋮ᔑ∷ 89 ↸╎ᔑᒲ𝙹リ↸ᓭ!” Dream said. Sap dived into the home portal and spawned back in his home, scaring the bejeebus out of Slime. The poor boy screamed and scrambled to run away from Sap while he tried to explain what happened. This led to Slime clinging to Sapnap while he explained what was happening with Dream in the end to Grian and X, who were in the middle of designing a floor is lava game with a death run twist. “HE’S STUCK!?” Grian yelled, dropping the warped blocks in his hands. “Mhm… He just stood there, purple eyes and all, staring at us.” Sapnap said. “Sapnap, go and summon Exdee. We’ll be on our way to help him out.” Xisuma said, noticing Grian’s anxious chirps. “Should I call Stress as well?” Sapnap asked, earning an excited gasp from Slime and the chant of Stress’ name. “Yes, but make sure she’s holding onto you.” X said, following Grian. “Wait… Is that because I'm the youngest of the group!? Aw man…” Sapnap huffed, calling Exdee and Stress to explain.

Oh did those two whip out the worried parent/sibling hats…. They even had capes with the words ‘certified parent/sibling’ on them…

Chapter Text

<Sapnap: mama duckie?>

<Stressmonster101: yes dear?>

<Hannahxxrose: why did i expect puffy to say smth?>

<Sapnap: we have a situation>

<Stressmonster101: wru>

<DreamXD: He's by the gaming alley>

<Stressmonster101: thank you!>

<Stressmonster101: sapnap do not move ok?>

<Sapnap: ok>

Sapnap sat where he was, waiting for Stress to arrive. He even played pattycake with Slime and watched as the little one tried to chew his hands. It was cute since his hands wouldn't actually get chewed and would only get slimey. "Sappy!" Stress said, making Sapnap and Slime look in her direction. "Mama Duckie!!" Sapnap yelled. He had gotten into the habit of calling Stress that after she had worn a duck costume to an expedition to a sea temple. Now she's Mama Duckie to him and Slime. "Tuppie!!" Slime yelled, making grabby hands at Stress. She smiles and hugged the two. "Oh! So, what's the situation?" Stress asked.

"Uh- well... Uh..." Sapnap started before Slime yelled and wiggled out from Stress's grip to hug Exdee. "Hello, there... Now what's going on with Dream?" Exdee asked. "Shouldn't he know?" Stress whispered to Sapnap, who shrugged. "I dunno... I just got my connected god..." Sapnap said, making Stress laugh. "Hello?" Exdee said. 

"Ok, everyone hold onto your pants, here's the story..." Sapnap said. (Tbh, this is a saying I say often...) This was the segway Sapnap used to explain the situation of Dream. "And then- He just stood in the portal! So I made George try to tap into his code and see what was going on while I went to go get Grian and Xisuma! Oh and they told me to tell you guys too! So, yeah.... That's all..." Sapnap said, swaying in half circles after he finished his rant. Stress and Exdee looked at him like he had retold the story of a murder. 

"How could you recall events so crystal clear, but you could not remember what Dream was like before and after the smp?" Exdee asked. Sapnap blushed and huffed. "I was worried about my engagement falling apart!" Sapnap said. "You hadn't met them when Dream had started to show signs of possession." Exdee said. "Shaddup! I was preoccupied with being a third wheel then." Sapnap said. Stress hugged Sapnap and smiled at him. "Don't you worry, little arson." She said.

"Little arson?" Sapnap and Exdee said. "I know what you did last time you were at Cub's battle tree." She said. "Ok, you got me..." Sapnap said. "Mother-Son time later, worry about your other son now." Exdee said. "Sapnap, take us to the end." Stress said. Sapnap nodded and went to take a step, only to yelp when all of them were teleported to the main end island. Slime gasped and wiggled in Exdee's arms to get to Sapnap. "Tappy! Tappy!!" Slime whined, tittering and sniffling. Sapnap cooed and scooped the baby out from the god's arms and bounced them on his hip.

"Like a true father." False hummed. "Huh?" Sapnap asked, looking at her while Slime hid in his neck and cried. "Oh, it's ok! I've got you! Oh, Slimey..." Sapnap cooed, calming the boy. "Tappy... 'cared..." they sniffled. "Oh, it's ok... You know, your uncles and I always went here..." Sapnap said. "Yeah, and Dream always managed to kill us here or on the way here." George said, making Slime yelp and cling to Sapnap more. "Great, now he won't sleep!" Sapnap groaned. "He already has issues with nightmares... Now he'll be afraid I'll disappear! I hate you sometimes Gogy..." The ravenette huffed, letting his youngest baby cry into his shirt and cling to him. 

"Well... Based off of what I see, your ender features are getting more prominent as you stay here..." Exdee hummed. "∴ᒷꖎꖎ, ∴ᒷꖎꖎ, ∴ᒷꖎꖎ... ╎⎓ ╎ℸ ̣  ╎ᓭリ'ℸ ̣  リ╎⊣⍑ℸ ̣ ᒲᔑ∷ᒷ~ 𝙹⚍∷ ꖎ╎ℸ ̣ ℸ ̣ ꖎᒷ ∷⚍リᔑ∴ᔑ||!" a voice said, making only Dream and Exdee look around. "Dream, can you get Nightmare to take control?" Exdee asked, holding their brother's shoulders. "╎ ℸ ̣ ⍑╎リꖌ ᓭ𝙹? ∴⍑||?" Dream said. "You need to do it now. He's the only one who can probably protect us." Exdee said. "Wait, can't you?" Impulse and Punz asked. "Well, a watcher is more cunning than a god. But we are more powerful." Exdee said. "You mentioned a voidwalker, what about them?" George asked.

"Oh... They're like the powerful equivalent to a drowned." Exdee said. "We are not! We may be just a tad bit weaker than... Them.." Xisuma yelled, gesturing at Grian with the mention of them. "Hey!" Grian yelled. "But we are not like the drowned! We don't jut spit the void at you... geez..." X huffed. "Oh my... You alright, Dream?" Grian asked.

Dream shrugged as he held his head. "Don't fight him..." Grian said. "↸𝙹 ||𝙹⚍ ℸ ̣ ⍑╎リꖌ ∴ᒷ ∴ᔑリℸ ̣  ℸ ̣ 𝙹 ʖᒷ ⍑ᒷ∷ᒷ?" Nightmare growled. "He said: 'Do you think we want to be here?' by the way." Grian said. Nightmare made Dream's purple eyes glare at Grian, who shrugged. "Who else is gonna translate? we both know he isn't." Grian said, pointing to Exdee. "Ok! Exdee, Grian, George... You guys help me figure this out." X said. "Ok? I'm gonna leech off your communicator, cause I'm not allowed admin thing-a-moo-bobs." Grian hummed. "They're permissions, you- Never mind..." George said. 

"Xisuma... If I may... See that jumbled mess? That's watcher code... They tend to jumble things up to restrict us... Nightmare must've managed to re-jumble this line to escape them." Grian said, pointing out one line. "Hold on... Did you see that?" George said, pointing at one spot. "It says do.. Do what?" Grian asked. "No clue..." Xisuma asked. "I remember that code... I put that code in personally to help with his ender side... Players tend to look each other in the eyes, and well..." Exdee said. 

"Maybe I should ask a hybrid specialist?" Stress asked. "Yes! Grian, go with Stress!" George said. "Take Sapnap too." Exdee said. "Wait, what?" Sapnap piped up, stopping his actions from before. Which was rubbing Slime's little tummy. "Take Slime! He's technically a player now anyway!" Exdee said. "Can you bless him?" Sapnap asked. "What? Why?" Exdee asked. "You know, kiss his head or somthin'..." Sapnap said, smiling when the god did so. 

"Now you must be off!" Xisuma said, shooing the group into the overworld and going back to helping Dream.

Chapter Text

Hi guys, the word may have spread by now but long-time YouTuber and content creator Technoblade has passed away from cancer. As stated by his family he passed away in peace, knowing that it was time to rest. He was an amazing person and creator and will be dearly missed. He loved us all and donated to a few groups who needed it in regards to cancer research. 10.4 million subs was a huge goal that he set and we all smashed it!

please know that I will be taking a creative break to mourn in my own way, those who cared deeply are most likely in a very sad state of mind right now, so if you happen to run into someone please be respectful and show kindness.

Chapter Text

"TECHNO!!" Tommy yelled, kicking open the piglin's door. Usually the pinkette would be awake and groan at the blonde's childishness... But today, there wasn't a sound. No Steve, none of the wolves stirred... Nothing. Tommy looked around the clean abode Techno claimed as his own and sighed. 

"He doesn't sleep in... And the animals are unusually quiet..." Tommy said, getting his comm out.

<Tommyinnit: Has anyone seen Techno or seen the animals that belong to him?>

<Sapnap: no>

<PearlescentMoon: No?>

<Xisumavoid: I'm not registering him on the list of members>

<Dream: Can't sense him.>

<Ph1lza: Tommy stay right there, don't go anywhere>

<Tommyinnit: how'd you know I was by his home?>

<ImpulseSV: You mentioned his animal friends>

Tommy sat at the dining table right as Phil flew in and pulled him out. "Phil... What's wrong?" Tommy asked. "Just stay outside." Phil said. For the first time, Tommy listened to Phil. The boy sat in his spot while Phil mourned for his friend. He was one of the few who knew of Techno's sickness. Usually it isn't severe... For most mob types. Unless the mob who had it was a nether type. 

"How could someone so strategic pull all the bad straws?" Phil asked as he messages X and Dream the bad news. X had to plan the service for Techno since Dream is currently uselessly waiting in the end. The admin was allowed to ask for help, which the remaining adults gladly helped with. Mumbo and Impulse were put on minor duty, so gray hairs were inevitable. 

The next day, Techno's funeral was upon them. (We'll elaborate on how Dream gets out next chap) Dream was back to english and being the walking tissue for all the kids and teens, which was basically his job typically. The service was quick and easy, as Techno had made Phil swear it would be. A quick word from Phil, Dream (surprisingly) and some others that had gotten to know him well. Afterwards, they did a viking burial for him. 

You know, making a ship, tossing his body on it (not literally), dousing it in flammable things, pushing it out to sea, and letting George hit it with a flaming arrow. Everyone watched as the ship sail away, on fire. Naturally, someone had to ruin the moment by asking if someone had marshmallows.

And we all know who that would be. (Feel free to leave a guess down below to cheer up)

Chapter Text

"Hello?" Stress asked, walking around on hypixel and looking for her contact. "So... how do you know a hybrid specialist?" Sapnap asked, smiling when Slime started to point out things he recognized. Which was mostly food. "Tappy!! Moobles!" Slime said, pointing to a ramen cart. "They're hungry, aren't they?" Grian groaned. "We can stop! We have time!" Stress said, smiling when Slime thanked her. 

The group went over and the shopkeeper cooed at Slime and Sapnap. They may have given them a discount for Slime being an adorable doofus. Like his father! "Pap-pa!" Slime said, making Sapnap cry in joy. "His first real word!" Sapnap sniffled, hugging Slime more, which the boy giggled at and smooshed his face on Sapnap's chest. "Aba!" Slime said, opening their mouth so Sapnap could feed him. He has problems eating still. Most things phase through their hands or dissolve. Sapnap feeds the boy and makes sure he chews. 

After they feed Slime, (and themselves) Stress continues her search for the specialist. Grian sighed and wandered behind them, yawning slightly. "Grian, I can carry you on my back and Stress can hold Slime..." Sapnap said. "No... I'm cool." Grian said. "Such a stubborn idiot..." Stress said, taking Slime and bouncing the giddy boy on her hip. Sapnap piggybacked Grian while Stress led the way. 

A few more minutes of walking and Stress stopped in front of a vet place. Slime yelped at the place and hid in her neck. Slime may have a fear of vets and doctors since Beckerson always comes home sad or crying. Sapnap went over and kissed his head, letting Slime nuzzle close to him before hiding with Stress again. Stress opened the door and smiled when she was met with a familiar face stuffed in a book. "Oh Python~!" she sang, making the said person look up and smile.

"Stress! Grian! And... Two others.... How are you guys!?" Python yelled, hopping over the counter he was behind to hug the the four. Slime whined and Sapnap let Grian down for the hug, so he took Slime from Stress and kissed his head. "Sleepy, bub?" Sapnap asked, cooing at Slime's little yawn. "Oh... Such a cute family... Say, its not too offensive to ask how old you are, is it?" Python said. "I'm 20, and nope!" Sapnap said, kissing Slime's face. The boy giggled and squealed which made everyone smile. 

"Ah! Right! The reason we're here... We need your help with a problem." Stress said. "Huh? The hermits or hermitcraft have a problem they can't fix?" Python asked. "We literally had a moon off itself by slamming into the server. Yes, we do, Python." Grian said. "Goopy..." Slime huffed. "Slime, he's not grumpy... Just tired... You'd be like this if Beckerson decided to jump on your bed all night, hm?" Sapnap said, bouncing the bab. "He's so good at this..." Python whispered to Stress. "You should've seen him during our tickle war..." Stress hummed, remembering the time he jumped in when Slime's turn came up and the boy tripped and fell on their face. Poor kid broke the skull in his face, so Sap had to quickly run in and replace it with another skeleton's skull for Slime.

"So! What's the problem?" Python asked. "Take it away G." Sapnap said. "Ok, Buckle your seat belt..." Grian said, starting the tale of how Dream got stuck in the end with Sapnap's help. "So... He's a enderdragon hybrid?" Python started. "Mhm." Stress hummed, wiping Slime's nose after he had sneezed. "And a watcher now too." Grian said. "Which were what again?" Python continued. "A-holes." Sapnap growled, Slime copying his growl. "Uh huh... And you said his eyes were completely purple and he spoke a language Grian and the god Exdee understood?" Python yapped, getting out a book on ancient beings. "Yup... Thankfully we had a mute friend, and used sign language to communicate." Sapnap said. "Aha! I think there's a solution to his problem... But it requires ingredients only found in modded versions of the end." Python said.

"Wait... Modded?" Grian asked. "Mhm... You can get Chorus fruit normally, but ender fluid, which is found in the stomachs of special type of enderman that is almost extinct, and the tears of a weeping shulker..." Python said. "Who made this?!" Sapnap gawked. "A brilliant hybridist who was once alive 50 years ago... Shame they were mauled to death by a light sensitive hybrid..." Python said. "Now if that doesn't make me scared. I don't know what will." Grian said. "Well... Could you at least come back to Hermitcraft with us? That way we can gather up supplies and a team?" Stress said.

Python sratched his head and looked at his shop. "I mean... One visit wouldn't hurt, right?" Python asked. There were three smiles and one yawn,

~~~

"PYTHON!!!!!" The OG hermits yelled, grouping to hug their friend. "Hello to you guys too..." Python said, laughing at their reactions to him. "And they call us puppies?" Someone said. Everyone turned to see Techno's ghost standing next them, stonefaced. Imagine SAD-ist's Techno by grayscale the hell out of him. "You- You good man?" Ranboo asked, jumping when Techno- No... Ghostblade. Not Techno... He's busy conquering heaven. 

Ghost turned to look at Ranboo and did his best to smile... Which creeped everyone out. "Don't do that ever again. Just scowl if you're having a positive time or reaction next time." Phil said. The Ghost nodded and went another direction... West maybe? Oh god- The Ghosts are loose! "So.... How is he gonna help Dream?" Tina asked. Sapnap bounded over with Slime on his back and went on to tell the others about what will help Dream. 

"I wanna go!" Tubbo yelled. "Well... That's the thing... The only people who have been to a modded end... Are Tommy, Phil, George and Ranboo.. And I'm not sure if that mod was the right one... Python said there are thousands, but they all utilize the same base mod." Sap said. "Wait... But Gogster is in the end with problem child..." Foolish asked. "Yes... So, we need to create a team, but before that we need to let him explain." Sapnap said.

"So... To the rock?" Fundy asked, holding Yogurt's hand. "Nope! To the shopping district!" Stress yelled, ushering everyone there. 

~~~

"How did I get stuck watching over you?" Sapnap asked no one in particular while he watched Pvp pat at a sliverfish. The bab looked at Sapnap with big orange eyes and smiled. "Gah!" he cooed making crab hands at Sapnap. He picked up the baby and let them babble and mess with his hair and face. The benefits of having two sons already! He's used to this by now. "Gah woo!" Pvp giggled, smoothing Sapnap's face. "Uh huh..." Sapnap hummed.

"No no. No no no! Sapnap, you did not kidnap Pvp!" Karl said as he walked over and scooped Pvp from Sapnap's arms to see if the baby was ok. "I didn't... It's just that Grian and Scar wanted alone time and gave Jellie and Pvp to us for the night..." Sapnap said. "Where's Jellie then?" Karl shot back right as Beckerson giggled and ran around Karl to hide behind him as Jellie bounced into their kitchen where they all were. "There she is! Having fun with our eldest son!" Sapnap said.

"You say that like they popped out of one of us..." Karl said, taking Pvp to change his diaper. "Eep! Daddy! Up!" Beckerson giggled, hopping into Sapnap's arms while Jellie playfully climbed up Sapnap's legs to cuddle Beckerson. Slime was a little busy watching fishies under his seat from the aquarium Dream, Scar, Wels, and Tango installed for the boy.

Karl hummed with Pvp, smiling when the baby's eyes glistened in the light of the fairy lights he had crafted. "Beeyoo" Pvp gasped, wanting to touch them. Karl held the bab's hands when he noticed them moving. "Careful... They get hot... Shhh... I've got ya..." Karl said, remembering the legend of Pandas.

Chapter Text

Beckerson yawned as he and his baby brother were tucked into bed. "Mommy... Can you tell us a bedtime story?" Beckerson asked. "Pory!" Slime called out. "Ok, you two... Get comfy..." Karl said, smiling when Slime wiggled in his bed more. "I good!" Slime said, holding the bear Cleo and Gem made him. "Now listen closely... Tonight, I'll tell you of the doomed god..." Karl said, making the kids gasp and ooh.

~~~

"Legend has it that there were once many gods who represented everything in life. From birth to death. But there was one god who was tasked to represent combat. Their name was PandasPVP. Now, they were the youngest of the gods. So with youth came recklessness. Now, PandasPVP wasn't too reckless. They were close with DreamXD and GeorgeHD, the gods of Order and Chaos. They had one rule: they wouldn't use their power against the others.

Now, with PandasPVP... He was prone to starting fights unintentionally. He didn't mean to! He'd mention something and a fight would break out. This led to him keeping quiet and staying away from others except HD and XD. Until one day... HD and XD had gotten into a disagreement and had yelled at him for trying to resolve their issue. After he had realized what he had done, he had run far away from them, despite their calls for him to return. 

Every god knew of the evil that lived inside them. And anything can trigger their evilness. Whether it was a simple misplacement of qualities in their creations or an unfortunate accident... Anything could trigger them. PandasPVP had reached his limit of bottling his anger and rage, attacking anything who dared get in his path. The gods feared the youngest god and turned to the two he was closest with. HD and XD, and when the two explained, the eldest of the gods demanded them to fix their mistake. 

So the two geared up with their best armor, best weapons, and went to stop PandasPVP... But what they were met with wasn't their friend... In his place, was a monster. Their friend was gone... They couldn't believe it... And none of them expected for a fight. XD was a firm believer in their rule, while HD... He didn't have a choice... With PandasPVP targeting him, he had to fight back... Even with the rule.

It took three days and four nights until XD and HD had pinned the youngest god down to talk some sense into him. All three had tired themselves out and were struggling to stay upright. ‘Kill me’ PandasPVP whispered to them, clinging to their armor clad arms. When they both refused, the youngest smiled. ‘You have to.’ he said. XD couldn’t bring himself to kill his friend. They were the closest thing to brothers. HD, however… Was a loyal god. He had to fix this…

And fix it he did. He granted PandasPVP wish. When they had returned to the gods, all that remained of the god was two orange stones that HD and XD carry with them to this day.”

~~~

“And that, is the legend of PandasPVP…” Karl said, noticing the boys were asleep. “You think Pvp will turn out that way again?” Sapnap asked, making Karl jump. “I…I don’t know… He’s such a sweetheart!” Karl said. “I wanna protect him, like he’s our own baby, but he’s not.” Sapnap said. “True… but we’re his uncles. And as uncles it’s also our job to keep him safe and on the right path.” Karl said. “Sweetheart… Who told you that?” Sapnap asked.

“Believe it or not, Kristen.” Karl said. “Who?” Sapnap asked. 

“Lady death.” 

“She has a name!?”

Chapter Text

"Ok, is everone ready?" Phil asked, making sure Tommy had enough snacks so his blood sugar levels would be fine, reminding Eryn to keep the red things on him at bay, making sure the hermits were aware of Tommy's signs of low blood sugar, and double-checking with everyone's inventory before they leave. 

"Ready!" Pearl says, adjusting her bag. "I'm set and ready." Beef hummed. "Is my band aid secured, Toms?" Eryn asked Tommy, who shrugged. "I dunno... Why do you have one on your nose?" Tommy asked. "Ghostblade socked me when I told him I didn't really like pork..." Eryn said. "Ah..." Tommy said. "Does anyone have any more berries?" Gem asked. "I do!" Fundy said, handing her a large burlap bag full of them. "Yogurt and I have learned a valuable thing about ourselves... We stress farm.." Fundy said. "Uh..." Gem said, looking at Impulse. The man sighed and took the bag after she took what she needed. "I'll put them in your base. Now you guys get going. Dream needs your help." Impulse said, hugging each of the team members. 

"We'll be back soon. Just make sure Tubbo doesn't try to follow us." Phil said, looking at Tubbo, who was dressed in a way that spelled out 'Even-if-I-wasn't-chosen-to-go-I-am'. Tubbo gave the elder a stare that made him sigh. "Ranboo! Get your husband before I get the belt." Phil said, making Eryn and Tommy laugh. "Off you guys go! Make sure to keep Python safe!" Bdubs yelled, waving to them. The group waved as X opened a portal for them to get to hypixel.

They walked in and let Python take the lead. "Ok... So we're looking for a server with a serial number of 554-907-8803... It's a modded end server that is said to have these ingredients... Now, this was made 50 or so years ago, but servers like this one is known for sticking around despite not having anyone living in there." Python said. (The number up there is completely random, don't do anything like calling it or looking it up, ok?) "What kind of serial number is that?" Tommy asked, looking at the servers around them. 

"One that is 70 times more dangerous than usual." Python said. "Ah! You're looking for a banner with a gradient... Purple to black... " Python finished. "I found it!!" Eryn called. "How did you get all the way over there!?" Phil yelled, noticing that the teen had somehow managed to wander about 7000 servers without anyone noticing. "There's a thing call '/tp'!" Eryn yelled. "He's got a point..." Pythin hummed.

The group made it to Eryn's location and gasped at the portal. "Woah... I wanna eat it..." Eryn said. "You don't wanna eat the things here unless your stomach was designed to handle ender foods... The edible matter here will kill any other hybrid except ender hybrids." Python said with a smile. "Something tells me you used to be a homicidal maniac in a past life." Pearl teased. "Maybe... Anywho! In we go!" python said walking into the portal.

~~~

"Phil!!! I've made a friend and I'm naming him Ploom!" Tommy said, showing off a grown albino enderman. "Oh my!" Phil yelled, looking down. "Python! Tommy found an albino endy..." Phil said. "Tommy! Can you get them to shed some fur? We'll need that to trick the shrieking enderman!" Python said. "Which one is that?" Beef asked. "The one we need the stomach fluid from. If we can get it to throw up, then we'll be on our way." Python said. "I take it that's the humane way to get stomach fluid..." Gem hummed. "Well... The Shriekers and Albinos don't get along. So shriekers tend to hurl large amounts of stomach fluids at the albino endermen. Then again, They'll spit stomach acid to almost every living thing here... Albino endermen are the exception." Python said as Tommy sheared some of Ploom's fur for him.

"Thank you Ploom!" Tommy hummed. The group managed to chase a shrieker and get the stomach fluid they needed... With Eryn stabbing the poor creature. "ERYN! NOOO" Python yelled as the boy scooped out the stomach contents and fluid. "There's like 18 more, its ok." Eryn said. "Now we have a hit on us... Huh?" Pearl asked. "No... Anywho, off to the weeping shulkers." Python said.

WHo would've thought that two teens and two wives would make a weeping shulker cry harder than a waterfall. "What did you guys do?" Beef asked, noticing the wet sobs the little box was making. "Gem decided to do an entire masterclass on pallette choices, Pearl started to yap about relationship goals, Eyrn was about to stab it and Tommy gave it a name..." Phil said. "This is Gunner!" Tommy said. 

They got the tears and well... Tommy took his new friends home. To say everyone made sure to keep their armor on, heads down and check their health. "You have everything?" Stress asked the group when they got back. "Yep! And we got friends!" Eryn said, motioning towards Tommy carrying Gunner and leading Ploom to the end with Falses help. "Ah... Python? Would you like some help with the concoction?" Stress asked. "Sure!" Pythin said. "Ooh! Impulse has a chorus fruit farm and a place to make this!" Sapnap said, bouncing Pvp on his hip while the baby chewed his shirt.

~~~

"Ok, Dream... You're not gonna like this..." Python said, feed Dream a spoonful of the goop. Dream huffed and signed his distaste. "Hey, do you wanna be stuck here forever?" Sapnap gasped, Pvp copying his connected. "Aboo-baa!" Pvp huffed, making everyone coo at his cuteness. "Just four spoonfuls. Ok?" Python said, smiling when Dream owned his mouth and grimaced at the goop.

Three spoonfuls and Dream was teleported back to his home with Yogurt shrieking in excitement and hugged him. "MAMA!" Yougurt yelled, hugging Dream. "Yogy!" Dream yelled, kissing the boy's head. Dream was happy to speak English and kiss his bab again. The end is harsh man!

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Tommy hummed as he sewed up Tubbo's flannel for the 70th time. "Tommy!" The blond heard. He looked up from the green and yellow flannel and saw Shroud with a basket of newly spun thread for him. "Oh! Thank you, Shroud! Have you seen if Ploom and Gunner are adjusting well to the end?" Tommy asked. "Well... They're more or less attempting to bring bits from home to our end, but they're doing great! I think?" Shroud said, handing Tommy the multi colored basked of thread. "Ok... Say, could you stop by the Jacobs-Halos real quickly? Since we now have dissolving resistant thread, could you grab some of Slimenap's clothes and bring them back?" Tommy asked. 

"Ok, Tommy! You know... You should make a tailoring boutique of something!" Shroud said before he left to get the material Tommy asked for. "Maybe... I don't know where to start first, though..." Tommy hummed, going back to finish Tubbo's flannel before hanging it up on a makeshift hanger he crafted out of the abundance of sticks he got from trading with villagers. He then placed his sewing needle on the needle bobbin he made to look like a golden apple like the ones he stole from Techno. Hey, he has to have some way of remembering his stand-in big brother when Wilbur fucking died, got resurrected, then almost killed again. At least Techno was consistent! But Ghostblade still scares him. 

"Hey, there." Ranboo called, waving at the blond. "Hi, Ranboob." Tommy teased, making his friend groan. "Again with that name..." The taller sighed. "What can I do for you?" Tommy snickered. "I'm here for Tubbo's flannel... Also, how are you?" Ranboo said, noticing Tommy's eyebags. "I'm coping the best I can... Also, here's Tubbo's flannel, and please remind him not to fist fight a swarm of vexes... I know his adopted father, Scar is one, and he encouraged him to fight the evil vexes, but please tell him next time that I will personally embroider the words 'I have no self-preservation' in frilly letters on the back of this." Tommy said, handing the ender-boy his platonic husband's flannel with a bee patch on the sleeve. 

Ranboo nodded and took the flannel. "You know... You should pull a Dream and make a shop off of this." Ranboo said. "Second person to say something like that." Tommy sighed, waving to Ranboo right as Shroud returned. "Hey Uncle Boo!" Shroud smiled, handing Tommy the slimey pile of clothes from Slimenap. "Here you go, Tommy..." Shroud said. "Thank you, Shroud... You can go play now." Tommy said, ruffling Shroud's hair. The spider boy smiled and ran off, calling Karl and Sapnap to ask if Beckerson was ok with a last-minute playdate. Tommy hummed some more while he de-slimed the slime child's clothing. 

His hand went right through the torso of one of the small shirts, which caused his big blue eyes to blink a few times before he registered what happened. "Oh sweet-" He huffed. "How the- You know what... I can make a patch for this... Maybe..." He said, plopping the clothing into a solution Tango helped him make to aid in the de-sliming process. "Ok... I'll be back in..." He started, looking at the sun. "Roughly 40 minutes... That should be enough time for Slimenap's slime to dissolve. He grabbed his satchel and left his base, setting a 40-minute timer. 

"Where to... Maybe a chat with Phil? No... He's training the new crows today... Ooh! Maybe I could steal one! No... It's no fun without Tubbo... You know what, I'll bother Impulse..." Tommy said... Oh how bad of an idea that was. Impulse had him making a goober machine... Which is is basically how to auto fish without having to load the chunks nearby... Poor Tommy... 40 minutes turned to 4 hours and by the time he got home, Shroud was washing off Slimenap's clothing and attempting to fix the hole. "hi..." Shroud whispered, looking at Tommy. "Hi... Having fun?" Tommy asked, sitting next to the boy trying his best to thread a needle.

"Shroud... You're going to need another thread or small wire to get it through the small hole... Here, let me try..." Tommy said, helping Shroud with the needle and thread. They then worked on fixing Slimenap's clothing. "So... Now, we have to be careful during this part, Shroud." Tommy said, helping Shroud. "You know... You really could run a sewing shop... I'm sure that would much easier for everyone to get the sewing help they need in the shopping district, Tommy." Shroud said. "Maybe... I'm just terrible with building, you know?" Tommy hummed. "Not terrible... Just need help." Shroud said.

This kid has more wisdom in him than our wisdom teeth! "You have a point..." Tommy said. They finished about half of Slimenap's shirts and pants before Shourd began to get woozy. "Tommy... I'm tired..." Shroud yawned. "Let's get you to bed." He said, picking up the spider kid and walking them to their bed before tucking himself in. 

The next day, Tommy finished the rest of Slimenap's clothing and delivered them to Sapnap, since Karl was off trying to tame a pufferfish for some odd reason. "Thanks, Tommy! You know, you could make a killing off of this!" Sapnap smiled. "Mhm... I've been told... Hey, you wouldn't mind helping me with that?" Tommy asked. "Like in a mining sense or building sense?" The ravenette questioned. "Mining... I don't have the material for a beacon to speed up the process... I might also ask Purpled since he loves to eat anything we don't eat." Tommy laughed. "Sure! Though I may have to bring along the kids with me..." Sapnap said. "I don't mind. Besides, Shroud might get curious and seek me out. He always seems to know where I am." Tommy laughed, waving good morning to a crazy bedhead of hair that was Beckerson. "Bye, Sapnap! I'll send you the coordinates to  where I plan to put the place!" Tommy sang as he skipped to go see Purpled and bother Bdubs and Scar on this.

Turns out, Purpled, Scar, Bdubs, and Sapnap became half the server pitching in to help out. Even Dream came to help... Something about magic giving atmosphere? Meh, who knows... That blond is the equivalent to Boba Fett. Trendy, yet mysterious. 

(Feel free to join the discord if you'd like! You can leave suggestions or ideas of what you guys imagine the world of this work would be like!)

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You ever look at someone and wonder: 'How did we go from one way to another way?' Yes? No? Maybe? Dream had that moment while watching Sam get chased by a bunch of agro-ed mobs in one of the hermit's automatic farms. "Mama? You ok?" Yogurt asked, sitting at the dinner table and eating mac and cheese with chicken bits mixed in. "Hm? Oh, I'm ok! Just... People watching." Dream replied, leaving the window he was at to sit with Yogurt. The foxboy smiled at his blond 'mom' and offered some of his food to him. "No, baby... You eat." Dream hummed, getting up and kissing his son's head. 

"Where are you going?" He asked. Dream smiled and ruffled his hair. "I have to do some farming down below, Yogy... I'll be back soon, ok?" Dream said, smiling at the boy and grabbing his tools. Which were his axe, pickaxe, shovel, and hoe. Most were netherite (His axe and pickaxe) but everything else was iron and gold (his shovel and hoe). Despite gold breaking more often, he didn't mind it. It gave him an incentive to remember certain crafting recipes. "Ok, mama... Oh! Before you leave, next week, can I sleepover at Finnely's and Foolish Jr?" Yogurt asked, making Dream freeze. "I may not like their father, but yes. Remember, if you get ad vibes from anything, you turn and run, ok? You remember where the safe spots you and I made are, correct?" Dream asked. "Mhm! One in the desert with a dead bush next to a cactus, one in the dark oak forest under the tree with a mushroom growing on the right side, and one in the shopping district in grandma Stress's candy shop!" He listed. "Don't forget that we're still working on the one in the flower field where we held uncle Sapnap's birthday party." Dream said.

The boy nodded and smiled. With that, Dream gave Yogurt one last kiss to his hair and left down the waterfall stream. He watched as the mobs ignored him and went for Sam. "You need help, Sam?" He called to the creeper. "I'm good!" Sam called, rushing to kill a zombie. He wasn't going to tell Sam that that specific zombie was a modified one. Shoot, Dream could barely tell the differences between the two sometimes. He's had a nice surprise a few times over a zombie that split into 3 upon death. One time the server lagged so much from his shock that every farm's loot was shuffled and jumbled for a 4,000 block radius. 

The blond quickly ran in and helped Sam out with the modified zomb... "I said I didn't need help." Sam huffed.  "Yeah... I know... But you also know I'm the worst at listening." Dream said. Sam groaned and killed the rest of the mobs. "Look... I don't have time for your teasing." Sam grumbled. "And I do not have time for your stubbornness. Look, I have a child and a husband now... I've gotten the monster up in my head under control now... What more do I have to do to make you not see me as a monster?" Dream asked. "Give Qauckity the revive book." He shot back. "You do realize that thing is just a prop, right? It does absolutely nothing. Literally. Lady Death is responsible for who lives and dies..." Dream said. "Wait... So you mean you've been playing a game!?" Sam yelled. "Actually, Nightmare just scribbled random death threats in galactic and made you and Quackity think they were spells..." Dream hummed, getting out a copy of the same book. "Nightmare wrote another one to piss off Ducky. Here." He said, tossing Sam the book. 

"This is useless." Sam said. "I know, Sap knows... Everyone knows except Quackity... You can hand it to him. Make him go even more crazy." Dream said, turning to go to his wheat farm. He preferred the manual ones. Every time he hears a redstone piston fire off, he still jumps and looks for hiding places. An old habit he still can't shake. "Look... I forgive you... But I may not forgive Quackity for a while." Dream said, leaving the shocked creeper. "Make sure he's ok for me." Dream called to Sam.

~~~

"Foolish, this is a bad idea." Scar called to the towering god, who was pushing his wheelchair. "But if I could get my brother and mother to be on good terms, and everything will be like before!" Foolish cheered. Scar sighed and held his head. This is going to be bad... From the short-ish timespan he's known Dream, he knows that blond can hide a grudge so well it'll seem like he's not bothered by anything. That's only happened once and Etho still has to double check his base every few days to see if Dream rigged any more booby traps that may or may not kill him. 

"Foolish... When Dream has someone on his black list, he's not going to take their name off anytime soon! Ask Etho! He fed Patches chocolate once and she almost died! Dream literally went to his base and rigged up multiple creeper traps! He still hasn't taken Etho's name off yet. Foolish, you are making this more difficult than it needs to be." Scar said, turning in his wheelchair to plead with the demigod. "But think of it! My family won't be broken anymore!" Foolish said. "Foolish... As a person who makes many mistakes, this is one... You do not want Dream and Puffy in the same room together. Let alone the same chunk! You saw what happened after his session. This will be worse!" Scar reasoned. Why are gods so thick-headed!?

Just like Scar predicted, it was terrible. Dream left Puffy 4 times while she tried to explain or even talk with him. "Wow, he doesn't want to be with her at all..." Foolish hummed, looking at Scar. The vex was facepalming and sighed out: "I could've been teaching Tubbo how to organically create trees." Poor Scar...

"Puffy! For the gazillionth time, I don't want anything to do with you!" Dream called, attempting to fill a large order of golden apple finger tarts. Which are surprisingly difficult to make! "But- Duckling please!" She tried. "No. Go away, and take your son with you. Leave Scar here though. He's the one I'm making this order for." Dream said, slamming the barrier that separated the baking area and serving area of Smile cafe shut. "Have a nice day, you two. Scar, did you have a certain size in mind for the 90 tarts?" Dream asked. Scar waited for Foolish and Puffy to leave before he told Dream: "I told him it was a bad idea and waste of time."

~~~

"I'm telling you, I wasn't running off of parental instinct when that happened!" Doc huffed. "Dudes... He totally was." Ren says to his dogs and their pups. Part of Doc wonders why he brings them everywhere he goes. "I wasn't! You know what? Let's have a bet. If we get Sam here and I don't kill him, You have to leave your pups at home for 5 days." Doc said. "And if you kill him, I get free stuff from your shops." Ren said. "Only for 3 days." Doc added. "Deal." Ren smiled. 

The two sought out Sam like he was a cancer cell in Cells At Work. When they did find him, they dragged him away from the redstone contraption he had and placed him in the community garden. "Um... Wha- Why?" Sam sputtered, trying to take in what just happened. "Time starts now, dudes!" Ren called. 

This is going to be a long day... Anyone wanna suggest what happens?

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I am the weirdest person I know... I'm over here reading yaoi, watching love boat, and eating oreo cookies simultaneously, and I'm feeling content with life... Does anyone else do something like this? Or anything close to this?

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Turns out, Doc and Ren's bet meant Sam was stuck with Doc for an hour. If Doc didn't find a way to get Sam killed, he'd win the bet. If Sam managed to die, Ren won! Simple, si? No... Ren made it so that everywhere Doc moved Sam, more danger resided. It took the two to hide out in Gem's jewel refining shop. Which the girl was residing at the moment. "Hey." she smiled. "Hi... can we stay here for about half an hour?" Doc asked. "Take all the time you need... Just make sure that Ren keeps those out of here," she said.

And they did just that. With Doc almost being poisoned to death through a wall. Gem may have a cave spider spawner that she uses to gain levels and collect drops. Granted she uses the string more as sewing thread. The eyes are for kindling for fires. Why? No clue. But once an hour hit, Ren declared Doc the winner of the bet and took his pups home where they were safe. Well... Safe is a relative term on the Hermitcraft server. "So, 5 days without them?" Ren sniffled. "Yep. 5 days." Doc says. They let Sam go back to his machine while Ren made sure his pups were in their kennels and safe. 

"Ok, Bye!!" Doc cheered, flying away to work on slime stuff. Ren sniffled to his doggos before leaving to do his other tasks. Poor Ren... Don't worry buddy! They'll be by your side soon! You're ok! He's not, he's crying... I'M SORRY REN!

~~~

"Now, Pvp, You are growing at an outstanding rate and with th- Do not eat the bunny rabbit for all that is holy." Exdee said, watching the now 6-year-old godling hold a small bunny in his arms. "Wha? But I'm hungry...." Pvp sniffled. "You do not eat baby bunnies. You eat the elder animals who no longer server their purpose." HD said. "Do not word it that way." Exdee laughed, taking the bun away from the younger and looking at his eyes. "I know you are not your predecessor... But you have big shoes to fill." Exdee said, looking at HD's veil-covered face. "What?" HD asked. "Nothing..." Exdee said, looking back at Pvp. "Now, we're going to start the basics." Exdee said. "Ooh! Like the floaty stuff you guys do!?" Pvp beams. "Levitation, and yes. But there's more. More so, how to control your power." HD said, kneeling next to Pvp's right. The boy looked at HD and blinked at them. "Why don't you ever show us your face?" Pvp asked, looking at HD and then Exdee. "Uh... I look too much like Dream." Exdee said. "I have an unsightly scar that would surely scare you." HD said. "Well coated in truthfulness as always, HD." Exdee hummed. 

"I wanna see! Please?" Pvp called, looking at the two. Exdee and HD looked at each other in a concerned fashion. The two gods stared at each other before HD sighed and moved their hands to undo the clasps that held their veil in place. After Exdee and Pvp heard two 'clinks' both looked at HD, where they saw HD's face. They looked much like George, but they had a large scar stemming from their left ear and going down to their exposed shoulder. Pvp placed a hand on their face and smiled. "Still pretty!" The kid smiled, making the god in questing blush a faint blue and lean their head into the child's hands. "Thank you." They said. 

This led to Pvp and HD pressure Exdee out from his own mask. Which as he warned, he looked almost exactly like Dream, but with black eyes with an X in his left eye and a D in his right. "Now, can we get to your lessons, Pvp?" Exdee hummed. "Ok!" The boy giggled, patting Exdee's face. For 3 hours, the two gods worked with Pvp, gauging how powerful he was. On both of their scales from 1 to 10, he's on a 'holy mother of void, we're screwed if he snaps again' level. Which is not good for Grian and Scar. 

HD nodded to Exdee, who quickly placed his mask back on and teleported to inform the desert buddies of their child. "YOU MEAN I HAVE ANOTHER THIRD LIFE SCAR ON MY HANDS!?" Grian yelled, dropping the shulker of gravel he had in his hands to grab his hair. Scar was busy laughing to care that Grian mentioned third life. "What happened to not mentioning that?" Exdee pointed out. 

"Screw that! Take me to my egg." Grian said. "Um... And Scar?" Exdee asked. "No, I'm ok..." Scar said, yelping when Grian grabbed him and nodded to Exdee. The god teleported them home where Pvp and HD, with their veil back on, were attempting to create a dust bubble. "Dada! Papa!" Pvp yelled, running over to tackle Grian and Scar in a hug. 'Cute' HD and Exdee thought, smiling and readjusting their face coverings.

~~~

"Ok! So to the beach?" Karl called, double checking the beach shulker Sapnap had set up. "Mhm!" Sap smiled. "Beach!!!!!" Beckerson yelled, running circles around Slimenap while the slime looked in awe. "Ready, kids?" Sap called, watching Beckerson jump around and Slimenap wobble over, still getting used to having legs and not blobs to move. 

The family left the house and took the nether highway to the beach. Of course, that meant Beckerson had to down many water bottles and buckets of water before they even got to the beach. Sapnap decided to carry Beckerson the rest of the way. The hermits had made the hub on the roof with an access point for those who needed to be below the hub for the nether, and had also made it spawn proof! o the family was free to mosey along at their own pace without their weapons on display. 

The beach was fun! Karl and Sap got the 'alone' time they needed while Beckerson taught Slimenap how to float. Sure, Karl and Sap had sand where it shouldn't be, but there was a silver lining in this. Height does not determine the leader in parental fun time. (yes that's what the hermits call it, since there's kids almost everywhere now)

~~~

"Mom?" Yogurt asked, poking Dream's side. The blond was currently asleep when the boy had awakened him. "Hm?" Dream hummed, holding his pillow close to his head before checking the time. "Yogy... Why are you up at this time? It's 2 am..." Dream yawned, scooping his son up and placing him to lay next to him. "Did you and Papa ever have that thing we read in the stories?" Yogurt asked. "Love? Yes, why?" Dream asked. "I think I found mine? I kinda got scared by them and locked them in my room." Yogurt explained. 

Dream's sleep-addled mind took much longer to register what Yogurt had said, but when he did, he jolted upright. "WHAT!?" Dream yelled. He had Yogurt show him the love of his son's life and groaned internally when he saw it was a chicken jockey.

"Um... Darling... Do you know what that iS!?" Dream yelled the last bit, slamming the door and scooped up Yogurt. "Mama?" Yogurt asked. "Yogurt... That's a chicken jockey... They don't really feel..." Dream said. "Auntie Cleo feels!" Yogurt argued."Baby... There are many different types of zombie... But that type?" Dream said. He didn't mean to sound so uptight, but this is a chicken jockey we're talking about... Those fuckers know how to mess shit up and stir up shit. "Mama... You promised you'd support me..." Yougurt sniffled. "Honey... I do... It's just... Your uncle Phil and a few others have very bad pasts with chicken jockeies..." Dream said. "Here..." Dream said, handing Yougurt the supplies to cure a zombie villager. If there's one thing, he has faith that Doc, Impulse or Zedaph have found a way to cure a regular chicken zombie... "Mama..." Yogurt said. "Hm?" Dream said. "Is this going to work?" Yogurt asked. "No idea... Anyway! Have fun, Yogy! Love means sacrifice!" Dream said, opening the door. This prompted Yogurt in yelping and running away while the zombie on a chicken chased after him. "Mama! Help!" Yogurt yelped, climbing up Dream's back. 

"Ok... Am I allowed t fight back?" Dream asked. watching the little chicken peck at his leg. "Please. Kill it... Yeetus the fetus, please!" Yogurt yelled. "We need to  stop letting you hang out with Karl and Sap for a while..." Dream said, calling Fundy to deal with the jockey while he cleaned up Yogurt... What an eventful start to a morning!

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That's all... may not be able to update for a very long time... Sorry

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So my fingerpads stopped bleeding!! My cuticles haven't yet... thankfully, my other 8 (counting the thumbs) fingers aren't bleeding! They sting, but what can an iron deficient dummy do? Oh! And one of my nails broke off! Not too badly... just halfway.... Hurts... But that was because my brother closed a car door on my hand. So I should be able to crank out the next part? Not sure? But soon! I promise!

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"Bapbap!!" Pvp giggled, rushing to hug Sapnap's tummy. "Ack! Hey, mini me!" Sapnap said, grunting as he held up the lid to Tango's access tunnels for Decked Out. "What doing?" Pvp asked, nuzzling the blaze's tummy more. "Well, Uncle Tango needed someone to protect his Redstone access tunnels while his game is under routine maintenance," Sapnap said. "So, why you holding that then?" The little one asked, his little panda ears twitching every time a drowned made a noise. "Well, your dads and uncles and aunts love to prank each other, and Uncle Tango doesn't want to be left here alone." Sapnap said. "Oh... After this can we play that game you and uncle Gogy and uncle Deam play?" Pvp asked. "Which one?" Sapnap hummed, propping the lid with one arm to pet the boy's hair. "The one where Uncle Dream has to hide from you guys!"Pvp smiled. "What?" Sapnap asked, earning a sigh. "You know! The one where you guys got trapped in the roof of the nether!" Pvp sniffled. "Oh! Manhunt!" Sapnap realized. "Mhm!" Pvp said. "No." the bigger said. "What!? Why?"Pvp sniffled, looking at Sapnap with those big orange eyes.

Sapnap smiled and opened his mouth, but was cut off by Tango."All done down there, Sap. Thanks again for making sure I was ok." Tango said, noticing little Pvp. "Why aren't you in your lessons, young dude?" Tango asked. Pvp stuck his tongue out and groaned. "Boring!! All I'm told is to be mindful! What good that!?" Pvp huffed. "Well... They tell you that so you don't end up hurting someone. I know they'll be okay here, but elsewhere, someone could get seriously hurt." Tango said. Pvp huffed and then sighed. "But I don't wanna learn how to fight and protect the universe... I wanna stuff my face with Auntie Stress's cooking..." Pvp sniffled. "Oh... Dude, you can do that and protect the world. Trust me, you're a small version of me... You can do anything." Sapnap hummed as he closed the access tunnel lid. He then scooped the boy up and went to go drop him off with Grian and Pearl before the boy stopped him. 

"No! Wanna stay with you!" Pvp yelled, hugging Sapnap's head more. "Ok! Ok! But if your uncle Karl sees me with you, it's the doghouse for me, ya hear?" Sapnap said, booping the boy's nose. "Mhm! But please! Don't make me go back to learning about magic..." Pvp said. "Only for today, but I want you to double down tomorrow, you hear me? Don't end up like me and mining most of the time away, ok?" Sapnap teased. Pvp nodded. This resulted in the two having a makeshift picnic in the nether where Pvp got to mess with magma cubes. Sapnap smiled at how the panda bab squished the flame cube. 

"Yup, a small version of you." The two heard. Both turned to see Ghostblade with his hands up. "Hey, not here for fighti- Ok, I was here to possess a piglin, but that's all." Ghostblade said. "Bro..." Sapnap huffed. Pvp puffed his face and turned to play with the cube again. "Anywho, I'm off." Ghost said. "Go east 600 blocks, you'll find a wandering Piglin patrol." Sapnap hummed, watching the ghost float that way. "Still good with direction." Sapnap hummed, wiping Pvp's face free of magma. "Pvp... You don't eat the magma cream." Sapnap said. "But it tastes spicy!" Pvp huffed. "Mhm.." Sapnap hummed, scooping the bab up and leaving to the overworld to give the boy back to Grian and Scar. "Oh, Thank you, Sap..." Scar said, taking the boy and kissing the boy's face. "He loves doing that to him... Thank you again, Sap... We almost had a breakdown when Exdee and HD reported that they hadn't seen or sensed him." Grian said. "He just popped up next to me and almost trapped Tango in his game..." Sapnap hummed.

"You better get going before Karl has a memory lapse or something... I have that feeling." Grian said, shooing the other away. Sure enough, Karl was crying himself to sleep screaming about a Mason, Cornelius, and Jackie. At least Sap, Slimenap, and Berckerson were there to comfort him with cuddles and popcorn. 

Chapter Text

"-and then we can have a giant display with big letters spelling: Congrats Pvp! What do you thi- Grian?" Bdubs rambled, finally noting Grian staring to his left in a concerned manner. "G-man?" The big eyed man called, waving to the other, who turned to him. "Sorry... The weather's all wonky..." Grian hummed, smiling to Bdubs. The only time this had happened in his memory was when X couldn't figure out how to operate Doc and Ren's game breaker. 

"Something's wrong... Be right back, ok?" Grian said, getting his rockets and setting off to find Dream. He knew X was ok, since he was off getting clay for something. But Dream? He hasn't checked in with him or Pearl lately! "Please be ok..." Grian called to himself while he tumbled into the blond's home. This scared Yogurt and made the boy jump. "Uncle Grian? What's wrong?" Yogurt asked, looking at the other. "Where's your mom?" He asked, knowing Yogurt saw Dream as his mom. "In the garden... Why?" Yogurt asked, following Grian when he started to walk there. "You ever get that bad feeling, Yogs?" Grian asked. "Yeah..." Yogurt said. "I got one just now that said 'check on him.'" Grian hummed, seeing Dream sitting in his little garden of poppies, lilacs, oxeye daisies and crops. 

"Mama?" Yogurt asked. Dream turned and smiled at the boy. "Hm?" He hummed. "Uncle Grian wants to check up on you..." Yogurt said. Dream looked at Grian with a confused face. "Wha? Why?" Dream asked, turning his body fully to see them. "I just had a feeling... Are you and Nightmare feeling ok?" Grian asked. Dream shrugged and his eyes changed. "Nightmare? Are you feeling alright?" Grian asked, making Nightmare flinch in Dream's body. Purplish-red eyes met black... And with a shaky sigh, the watcher said: "I can feel his tormentor's motivations..." Grian froze before he looked at Yogurt. "Huh?" The boy asked, blinking in a dumbfounded way. Something that always reminded Dream and Nightmare of Fundy when the little fox would stare at them in Mcc...

"Yogurt, could you go to your Uncle Tango's for a little?" Grian asked. "Uncle Tangy? Wait... Isn't he in the nether for the day!?" Yogurt gasped, yipping in a scared fashion. "Oh... What about Auntie Cleo? I think she's helping Uncle Scar with a shop of his!" Grian said, making the scared fox light up. "UNCIE SCAR!" Yogurt cheered, hopping to go grab his outdoors shoes and clothes. "You stay right here, kid... I'll drop him off with those two so we can discuss this, ok?" Grian said. "Why not Fundy?" Nightmare asked. To be fair, Dream and Nightmare had no idea where Fundy ran off to this morning... The elder watcher smiled at the younger one and ruffled his hair. "He's a tad busy... But I'll tell him you both miss him. I'll be right back, ok?" Grian said, leaving Dream and Nightmare to themselves...

"So, you're sure Quackity is still after that thing?" Grian asked, earning a nod. "Do you have it?" Grian continued, watching the other shake their head. "Where is it?" He asks. "Sam has the copy... It's useless..." Nightmare said. Grian nodded and turned to his communicator. "What would he need it for?" Grian asked. "Power...What more?" Dream said. "Seriously, you two need a codeword for when you're gonna switch back..." Grian said, holding his chest. Poor guy, can't catch a break with the baby watcher... Then again, Pearl was just as scary when she was getting used to being one as well...

"I can talk with Sam... Can I?" Dream asked. "If you believe so... I have to go back to that meeting with Bdubs, ok?" Grian said, leaving Dream, only to return to no Bdubs being there. He checked his comm and saw that there were no messages from Bdubs... Hmmm... Odd... That big-eyed smiler always notified people where he was if they had to cut a meeting short... Unless something happened to someone he cares about... Oh- 

~~~

"Sapnap! You better finish that plate your husband made you or so help me, I will make you farm ice for weeks, mister." Bdubs said as Sapnap cried over a half-eaten plate of pancakes and eggs. Karl had called Bdubs, since Sapnap had lost touch with Bad and Skeppy after that egg incident. "But-" Sapnap sobbed, earning a Bdubs-patented glare that told him to eat. The blaze shakily began to eat again. The ravenette was genuinely hungry, but once he noticed how his muscle-to-fat ratio started to waver, he began to do a starvation method for dieting... It used to work, but as he got older and babies started to appear in the place of his beloved animals, he had to eat. Energy is not an easy thing to get sometimes.

"Sap... Please eat... I know you're uncomfortable right now, but I want you healthy." Bdubs said. So there they sat, Sapnap trying to wiggle free of eating lunch and dinner, and Bdubs making him eat. He even did the choo-choo train while feeding Sap.

Chapter Text

Sorry I've been MIA for a while! Um, school has been hectic and it doesn't help that I have to get another semester to appease my mom, while finding a way to speedrun my other college work in an online school I really didn't want to pay. I have a lot to pay off and my mom keeps hounding me on when the last payment is... It ain't for a while, but she thinks 'finish now, and you won't need to pay them'... That ain't how it works. I asked the lady who enrolled me. She said 'you still pay even if you finish we send the diploma after the payments are done.' So yeah... My brain has been melting and my mom doesn't realize she's feeding a dying horse poison. 

Not literally, metaphorically! I just wish I had more braincells to cope with everything.... 

Chapter Text

Callahan placed down his planks as he silently planned out what he was making. It started out as a house, then it devolved into a survival minigame... How? The onesie-clad mute stared at the crazy mess that was his workspace, pouting slightly at the chaotic mess he had going on. A slight tap on his left shoulder made the mute jump. He wasn't deaf, but his ears were still damaged from the wars despite being mostly healed by now. Callahan turned around and almost pulled out his axe when he saw who was bothering him. 

"Woah there! Relax there, Callahan! Just needed some help with something...." False said, putting her hands up in the air. Callahan relaxed and signed 'What's up, Warrior?' False smiled and then looked confused. "Actually, that's what I need your help with, you know how George and Exdee have Marshal? Well, he doesn't speak and George has been teaching him sign language... I just need some help with some signs..."She said. Callahan smiled and knocked his hand with his thumb and pinkie out while nodding. He then got his communicator out and whispered to her.

You whispered to FalseSymmetry: if u want, point to what you want me to sign and i'll show u

Callahan looked at False while she nodded. "Thanks, Callahan! I owe you one!" She said, making Callahan tilt his head. He didn't need to be paid for anything, but if she insisted, ok? When she turned to leave, Callahan followed, making sure she knew what she needed to be translated. He kind of likes this, it reminds him of when the SMP was just getting built and set up, smiling and signing jokes to Sapnap or Dream casually while placing slabs down to make something.

~~~

How did Callahan showing False the sign for some things turn into a hermit only ASL lesson? Easy, Ren and Doc decided to message the entire hermit only chat about False getting extra signing lessons. How did they find out? False pointed at Doc and Ren and Callahan misinterpreted what she wanted to be signed and he signed Genius and Pet. When she asked what he said, he spelled out G-E-N-I-U-S and P-E-T. to her, knowing she was at least fluent in the alphabet enough to know the letters. 

For those curious about what the sign Genius looks like, imagine an American salute with only the pointer finger touching the forehead before pulling away into a pinch while your mouth makes an 'o' shape. Pet is simply tapping your dominant hand's fingertips on the back of your non-dominant hand twice. To say Doc was hurt at the fact that only 1 of the two was a genius and the other was pet to the genius rather than not knowing who was who. Ren just didn't care, if he was the pet, right on dudes! If he was the genius, awesome! So they began following and asking what certain things were signed as or if they signed a sentence to Callahan correctly. 9 times out of 10, they were horribly wrong... Like when Ren tried to sign: 'Have you seen my friend, Doc?' he signed: 'See Doc, my boyfriend.' to Callahan, to which the other responded: 'Awesome! I hope you use protection!' 

Thankfully, False understood that one! She was laughing her socks off while Ren looked confused. "You called Doc your Boyfriend!" She laughed, making the werewolf blush in embarrassment. "Shuddup..." Ren said, knowing Doc was about say something along the lines of 'And that's why I'm the Genius.'  The two soon turned to 5, then 9, then 19, then 23... And that's where we are now! 

All the hermits in a group, attempting to understand more ASL for their newest nephew/grandbaby, Marshal NotFound-XD. A stupid arrangement in Loser's opinion, but hey, they're in a mental crisis where logic is not their bestie at the moment. Poor Callahan... He should've made a shop for this... Sad times for the onesie hero. :(

Chapter Text

I swear, every fandom I'm in loves to traumatized my favorite or most relatable character. In my hero academia, I relate to Midoriya and every damn fic i find is of him getting his ass beaten from sunday to saturday, in miraculous ladybug, friggin Chat Nior (my personal fave for his sass) is litterly being ran over left and right and now in dsmp/hermitcraft friggin Sapnap and Scar!

Why is angst hella popular? I filter out angst and I barely get 8 pages of fics to read. I know I'm complaining, and all, but for the love of prime, I beg of ao3 writers to lay off the trauma for a bit... But anyway, I have an update!

So, in two weeks, my college is giving me my spring break! But of course, before spring break, they just have to drop all the homework on us... SO for a while I may not be able to update longer chapters like I want... :(

But! Good news, I'll chip away at my next few chapters here and there! I promise!

Chapter Text

Pvp groaned as Grian and Pearl droned on about teleportation and the importance of knowing where you're going. Why does he need to know this? Why can't he be like the other kids on the server and play with them? Why does he have to be cooped up in this big house with only his dads and Jellie for company? Why can't he run to his pop's friends and hug their legs like the others can? Is he that dangerous? 

"Peevs? Peev, hey, look at me." Pearl said, snapping the little one from his self-deprecating thoughts. She was in front of him, crouched down to hold his hands that had been scratching at his skin for thirty minutes "Huh?" He said, making the Aussie's eyebrows furrow together. "I think that's enough for today... Tomorrow I'll help you with teleporting ok?" She said. The boy nodded and then looked away. "I'll head to my room, dad..." Pvp said solemnly, packing up the two pencils, notebook and drink cup he had during the lesson. He didn't notice the two magical beings share a look.

"Pvp... You should go out and play with the other kids."Grian finally said after Pearl did a movement that looked like she was about to hit him from an outside perspective. Pvp looked up at Grian, scared. "What?" the smallest growled out, all he's been told is stay away from people and you won't hurt them, and now they want him near people! Ex-squeeze me!? "To test out your limit," Grian said. "O... Kay?" Pvp said, holding his arms again. "Think of this as a learning opportunity!" Pearl said. "Yeah... One where I mess up terribly and become the monster of the server..." Pvp said. Both the watchers shared a pained look while the smaller god walked away. "You've got to tell him." Pearl said. "What can I say? 'Hey, sweetie, ave you been having odd dreams that feel too real? Yeah, that's your past life coming back to your memories!' I can't say that to a kid who's olny a month old!" Grian said. "Technically he's only 6." Pearl said. "That's even worse!" Grian huffed. "You need to tell him sooner or later. Or else Exdee and HD will and those two are like gasoline on fire. Bad at being subtle." Pearl said. 

Grian snorted at the simile his sister friend made. At this point, he may as well just call Pearl his sister. (Loser can't remember if they made Pearl Grian's sis or not, forgive them pls) "I'll break it to him tonight." Grian said. "Break what?" Scar asked, falling through a hole that he forgot to fill in from his poor lighting habits. Yes, a creeper spawned next to him and blew a hole in the floor of the room above the designated magic room. "How have you not filled that in yet?" Pearl asked the vex, watching the green-eyed goof shake his head a little to rid his hair free of dust. "I have two adopted sons to worry about! How can I remember that?" Scar huffed. "Fair point." Pearl said. "But seriously, what're you guys breaking? And can I join?" Scar said, blinking unevenly at Grian mostly. 

"Papa... Are you sure I should go outside?" Pvp asked, now sporting a frog hat Boomer had given Grian to give to Pvp so the kid wouldn't get sunburnt if he went out. His clothes were more on the Sapnap-esqe side of blacks, whites, and arson. "Yes, kid. Now out you go. Be a kid today. No more lessons." Grian said, smiling at the huge smlie Pvp had. The child rarely had this smile. The kind where his snaggle teeth are on display and his eyes closed at how big his smile was. It made Grian feel guilty for making the kid slave behind a book and a board of symbols he's sure the kid still can't translate. Hell, it even took him years to fluently speak and read Galactic. And that language is as ancient as Mumbo's mustache. 

Pvp ran off and immediately teleported to where Yogurt was, since he knew that where the winter fox is, Beckerson is always nearby. Yogurt's scream of shock and Beckerson's yelp made Sapnap almost set fire to the steak he was cooking for later on. "Pvp! Don't just pop up in thin air like that, man!" Yogurt yelled, letting go of Beckerson's head so the fish kid could go back to sipping their water soup. It was a bowl of water, but Beckerson insisted they call it water soup... "Sorry... I'm just super excited! Dad said I can go outside and play with you guys today!" Pvp cheered. "Yo, you're moving up in the world, Mini me!" Sapnap said, sitting next to the boy and ruffling his hair. The tiny god giggled and smiled at Sapnap while the elder placed a glass of strawberry milk in front of the god. Since they're basically the same, Sapnap already knew that Pvp loved Strawberry milk. "Thank you, Sappy.." Pvp called, taking a sip with the striped straw Sapnap had stuck in the glass. 

The group waited until Slimenap waddled over and plopped themselves in the chair near Pvp, laying their head on his shoulder. The young god smiled and pat their head, not noticing the terrified looks on Yogurt and Beckerson's face. "How is he not getting burnt?" Yogurt asked. "Slimenap likes him..." Beckerson gaped. Not exactly, kids. Yes, Pvp's clothing on his shoulder is getting dissolved, but his skin is invincible against most mobs, sans other gods and watchers... Not even the wardens down below can hurt Pvp... The kid can hurt them! Friggin gremlin child...

Then came Marshal, then Micheal with Michelle, then the Foolish kids, then Shroud with snacks, then came the newest addition... Pablo! Shorud's stuffed sheep plush Tommy made for the spiderling's night terrors. It even has a squeaker inside for Shroud to squish! Cute! (Legit, my parents would buy dog toys with squeakers for me as a baby and I'd fall asleep cuddling those dang bones! XD) The kids cooed and awed at Shroud's new plush and made an agreement that Pablo deserves to be treated with respect and gentleness. Of course, Pvp was curious as to how the others parents raised them. Like any not-normal kid. 

So he waited for Sapnap to take them all to the community park in the shopping district that Sam Nook had built with the ghosts. "Ok you guys, you know the rules. No shoving, hitting, or biting." Sapnap said, earning a bunch of eager nods and cheers when he let the group of troublemakers free to play in the little park. Pvp, however, stayed near Sapnap and looked at him in a terrified manner. "What's up, mini me?" Sapnap asked. "I- I'm scared..." Pvp said. "Why's that?" Sapnap asked. "What if I get overwhelmed?" Pvp said. Sapnap smiled and pointed to the banner that every ex-DSMP member has on their shop. A simple blue-to-green gradient with an 'HD' and and 'XD' in their respective colors. "Those banners are linked to HD and Exdee... They'll see you're in trouble and rush to get to you." Sap explained, easing the child's worry. "Now go be a kid, mini me. For the both of us." Sapnap said. Pvp nodded and hopped off to play tag with Micheal and Michelle. 

After a few minutes of playing tag, the three sat with the others on the play structure. Then Pvp asked the question plaguing his mind. "So... How do your parents act with you?" Pvp asked. "Is uncle Grian or Uncle Scar being mean to you!?" Yogurt growled, holding Pvp by his arms. "Huh- No! No! I'm only curious!" Pvp said, waving his arms around to dispel the aggression. "Oh- Well, Mama gives me cuddles along with Patches while Papa teaches me things like math and english..." Yogurt said. "Both of my dads spoil me... They didn't even want to let me go on this outing until I mentioned that Yogurt and Beckerson would be there." Micheal said. "My guardians are hover moms... Look, they're already watching us with spyglasses... Hi mama and mom!" Michelle said, waving to Pearl and Gem, who were perched up on Jevin's tower of scares. It really wasn't scary in there... Just dark and it was a dropper-like attraction... 

"Tommy is awesome! He helps me with all my issues and makes me toys and sweaters!" Shroud cheered, hugging Pablo hard enough for the sheep plush to squeak in protest. The Foolish boys shrugged and said "Dad's busy trying to find the two idiots he's kissing up to." in the most monotone tone you'd think those two were trained assassins! "You mean the guys who tortured my mom for something stupid..." Yogurt growled. Pvp stared at Yogurt and paled a little. A memory of someone yelling at him flashed in his mind and his eyes teared up. He covered his eyes and got up to run to Sapnap, burying his face in the blaze's chest and crying. "Woah! Uh, hey, what's wrong, mini me?" Sapnap called, looking at the kids at the play structure who all looked confused and scared. 

Pvp's wails prompted Pearl to call Grian, Exdee and HD down to the playground and she flew over, leaving Gem to go check on the kids. When the three got to where Pvp was clinging to Sap, the blaze was cradling the boy with a sad smile. "Is he okay?" Grian asked, not moving. He knew right now Sapnap was in dad mode, and that man could dad. "He mentioned a memory... Of someone yelling and calling him names..." Sapnap aid sadly, recalling the legend Karl once told Beckerson and Slimenap as a bedtime story. "Ah void..." Grian sighed. "I don't think void is the best curse word here... It's shi-" HD started only for one of Exdee's wings to cover his mouth. 

"Do not finish that sentence... My kid is less than 6 feet away." Exdee said. Marshal ran over and hugged Exdee, smiling at him before scooting over to paw at Sapnap. "Yes, Marsh?" Sapnap asked. "Does... Does he wanna hug?" Marshal asked, looking at Sapnap. Sapnap looked at Pvpand nodded, letting the little one climb up the bench the two were on and hugging the shaking kid. After a little, Pvp calmed down and whimpered for Grian, which the blond picked him up. "I'm sorry..." Pvp said, hiding in Grian's neck. "No, I'm sorry, baby... Thank you Sapnap for being there for him." Grian said. 

"No worries! I- I understand how Pvp feels too." Sapnap says. The group of kids waved to Pvp and called for him to be okay and to get better. When Grian and Pvp got home, the boy was checked over by Scar and then sat down in the living area with Grian crouched to his level. "Pvp... That memory of yours... It's a memory of your past life..." Grian said, making the kid nod. "I figured... I've never seen the person yelling at me before... But I just knew it wasn't this me..." Pvp said. "Yeah... Pearl estimated you'll get more of those... At a more violent frequency." Grian said. "Can uncle Doc give me medicine to slow down the memories?" Pvp asked. "I don't know, sweetheart... Exdee and HD can place a spell on your mind to make you forget the more aggressive ones... But-" Grian said. "Sometimes, I feel like my memories are telling me something... Can you and auntie Pearl go in and see?" Pvp asked Grian. 

The blond's face softened and he smiled. "I'll see... Why don't you go to your pops and ask for your favorite for dinner tonight?" Grian said, making Pvp smile and run off. Man he loves that kid.

Chapter Text

Scar jolted awake, looking around the room wondering why his joints decided to start aching again. "What in the- It's cold isn't it?" He said out loud, making Jellie mrow in agreement and snuggle up on his chest more. It hurt breathing normally, but with the extra cat weight, it was excruciating. After a few pained wheezes, Scar managed to vex magic Jellie off of his chest to allow air in without bothering the bundle of fur and cuddles. Poor Scar... 

After a few minutes, Scar heard his bedroom door open and the sound of footie pajama feet padding on the wooden floor getting closer to his bed. "Pa? You're in pain... I can feel it from my bed..." Pvp said, placing his hands on Scar's bed while looking at his hurting dad. "'M sorry, Pvp... It's the downside of my past." Scar said. He saw how his son's orange eyes shifted to a blood red for a second before going back to orange. Something that Sapnap does when he's hurt or angry. Wow, this kid is like a mini Sapnap but with a longer fuse to blow than the energetic ravenette who is currently in community service for committing arson on an unclaimed pile of leaves that obscured his sight of the sunset. 

"Do we need to go to Uncle Doc's? He's a doctor, right?" Pvp hummed. Was Doc an actual Doctor? Maybe. Was Ponk working with him? Yep. Did that former one-armed healer have an extensive amount of medical knowledge? Yea. Honestly, Ponk was the real doctor of the server, but he'd rather have Doc be the face than himself... "Pvp... Could you do me a favor and go to the closet with the signs on the door and grab the folded wheelchair for me?" Scar said. Pvp gave Scar a confused look before the vex realized the god has no fickle-fern clue as to what a wheelchair is. "I'll point to it, all I need ya to do is open the door, kiddo,  " Scar said, making the younger version of Sapnap nod and rush to the left of his bed and open the door, looking to Scar for him to point at the folded wheelchair.

Once Pvp got it out and Scar instructed him on how to unfold the contraption and how to drag his body into said contraption. "Careful now... I can drag myself into the sitting part, I just need you to lock the wheels." Scar said, watching Pvp panic at how to do that. "The two small levers there and there... There you go, Peev! You're becoming a nurse faster than I can build!" Scar cheered, making the little god smile. Man, he wished Tubbo was here to see his baby brother in action. Pvp helped shuffle Scar into the chair and tried to push the elder out, but was stopped by Scar. "I can push, Pvp... You go get ready. Your dad wants me to take you with me to go to Doc and Ponk for your medicine." Scar said. "Why you, pops?" Pvp asked in an unhappy tone, he didn't mean the tone he said it in, it just slipped out that way?

"Ouch, I see my other son does not like me much..." Scar joked, making Pvp scramble to apologize. Scar wiped a fake tear from his eye and gasped dramatically. "My own son! Even Tubbo knows how fragile my weak heart is..." Scar gasped, making the younger huff in annoyance. "I'm just kidding, Pvp... Now! Let's go to the server's only hospital and await our fates... I know Doc's gonna make me do more labwork with my blood..." Scar sighed, shivering at the memory of when he had to do his labwork last time... Doc didn't just take one vial of blood... He took 3! All in one go! Something about his hemoglobin count being off, his red blood cells being less oxygenated, and his unusually high plasma count... Scar didn't have it in his heart to say that was normal with the number of experiments he was a part of in his childhood... 

~~~

The two made their way to the hospital and stopped when they saw Karl and Beckerson walking in as well. "Beck-beck!" Pvp called, beginning to run before he was lifted off the ground and was running in place. "Now, now, Pvp... Remember the no-running rule Doc and Ponk instilled here?" Scar asked, using his magic to push his wheelchair forward. "But, Pop! I miss Beckerson!" Pvp huffed. "I know, but safety first... I don't wanna experience Dr. Ponk's wrath again... He hit my head really hard..." Scar sniffled, setting the younger down. The god sighed and walked to the entrance of the hospital. "Hey hey! If it isn't la Familia Goodtimes!" Zedaph laughed, making Scar smile. "An Encanto reference!? I'm so proud of you Zedaph." Scar said. "What can I say? I'm a master at memorizing my friend's favorite things... Even yours, with your endless amount of likes and dislikes you hold dear to you." Zedaph said. "Like a true, true friend..."Scar said. "We help a friend in need. Now, I assume you're both here for your Labs and Pvp's medication prescription?" Zed said. Scar nodded and Zedaph handed the older of the pair a clip board. "Can you fill this out for Pvp, Scar? It's his first visit, so We need to document it." Zed said. "Gotcha bossman!" Scar said. "You're getting Tubbo-isms again..." Zed sighed. "I miss my oldest son!" Scar cried, making Pvp tilt his head. 

Beckerson noticed Pvp was here and watched the door. "Don't worry, sweetheart... You'll be out before out know it." Karl said. "But... What if I'm not ok? What if these scales stay forever!? I'll be a laughing stock..." Beckerson cried, holding his face where his scales still were. "Now you're exaggerating, Beckerson. You and I both know you'd be the life of the party. Your scale a beautiful, sweetheart..." Karl said, hugging his baby close. The two waited for Ponk to call them in, but before they could be called, Pvp and Scar came into the waiting room, where the two kids gasped and hugged each other. "You ok, Scar?" Karl asked, moving one of the waiting chairs so the wheelchair-bound man could park himself. "I'm ok... It's that time of the year when my body decides it can't function today and I must roll my way through the week..." Scar dramatically said. "In other words, your walking power is bleh and you need the good ol' wheely-boy to move, huh?" Karl said. "How did you simplify my simplified answer so well?" Scar gasped, before smiling. "I like you, kid!" He said. 

Karl smiled and watched as Beckerson and Pvp yapped about... Something? One second he could hear 'Veepee! The other day-' and 'Beck-beck, you reminded me-' and the rest of those sentences were babbled messes that only the Dream team could decipher. He's tried, but he's terrible...  Kinda like 'The risk I took was calculated, but boy! Am I bad at math!' Scar seems to understand the rambles fairly well, considering that man is easy to understand. "You know! I have a quest for you, Mister Jacobs-Halo!" Scar gasped, making Karl almost throw the book he was reading. "Eh?" Karl asked, looking at Scar's excited face before the man placed a shulker on the floor, ignoring the 'DO NOT PLACE ANYTHING IN THE WAITING ROOM' sign plastered in front of them. 

Scar got out a piece of vibrant yellow glass with a tag on it. "I need you to give this to Sapnap... He seems like he needs a happiness crystal..." Scar said. Karl took it and smiled. "I didn't know you made crystals..." Karl said. "I mean... I was a wizard for one season and a whole death game series...Where I died 6 times in one episode..." Scar said. "I- So, to Sappy?" Karl asked. Scar nodded as Ponk came into the waiting room and beckoned Karl, signaling the brunette to grab Beckerson's attention and make the boy hop up and rush to the doctor with a smile. "Uncle Ponko!!" The fishie cheered, hopping in place. Ponk smiled as he let them in. Then Doc came, letting Scar and Pvp in. 

They went to his themed section and Doc made Pvp sit on the exam table. "OK, so I'm going to explain your medication for your visions, Pvp... I've made this kind before for your dear fathers... But yours is going to be a bit stronger to counteract that you'll be getting your frequently rather than every other day." Doc said, watching how Pvp nodded and Scar listened intently. He then proceeded to explain the medicine and smiled when Scar would interrupt to simplify some of his 'scientific' words for Pvp. "That's all... Now Scar, gimme your arm." Doc said, making Scar sigh and roll up his sleeves for Doc. 

"Wow... pops, did you know your blood has a blue glow!?" Pvp gasped. "Yeah... Vex magic... And bad experiences..." Scar said, looking away while Pvp gave Doc a look. "His childhood wasn't fun... It's why he likes the name Scar better." Doc said. "Ah... Like how DreamXD and GeorgeHD refuse to call me by the name they gave me and instead they call me by the name everyone calls me?" Pvp asked. "Yea. Ok... Pvp, can you get the cotton ball and the tape in the med kit on the wall, please?" Doc asked the boy, who nodded and used his magic to attract the box. He was given the items and he patched up Scar's arm. 

"Come back in three days, ok?" Doc said. "Three Bdubs days or full days?" Scar asks. "Bdubs days, cause he sleeps the night away and makes these things so much easier." Doc laughed, while Scar and Pvp left with the boy's medicine and instructions in hand. "Ah... There's too many families on this server... And not enough medical people...We need o give them classes someday..." Doc sighed. Poor man.

Chapter Text

Intro: "Hello, My name is Loser and I'm going to explain how Ice cream is a sweet treat to everyone. Now, How many of us have dietary issues and can't find a suitable ice cream to eat on extremely difficult days? Just me? Ok... So, you may be wondering 'What are you going to tell me that every one of those companies who manufacture those ice creams aren't telling me?' and I can't say what I have to say here is mind-blowing new. Instead, I'll break down the main components of Ice Cream and how each component can be substituted to meet your diet or health restrictions."

Body 1: "Let's look at the ingredients that make the beloved treat known as Ice cream. You see, Ice cream has 4 main ingredients; Milk, Sugar, Flavor, and a cold component. Some recipes call for eggs, but for the sake of time, we'll ignore that sub-section of ice cream. Again, Ice cream only needs 3 edible ingredients and 1 temperature component. Not too difficult... You can make Ice cream with a mason jar, some milk, a dash of sugar, and a teaspoon of flavoring, shake it about with the lid on, and toss it into the freezer for 3 or so hours. You can even use 2 ziploc bags and have one with the ice cream mixture in it and the other has ice and salt along with the mixture bag in it and all you need to do is shake that bags around until the mixture starts to freeze up. Of course, if you have lactose intolerance, you can switch out the milk for plant-based milk, such as oat milk, and get the same results. Diabetics can replace the sugar with any type of sweetener they'd like as well."

Body 2: "While we're on the subject of Diabetics, let's take a look at their diets and the types of diabetes to better gauge how ice cream can be incorporated into their diets. You see, In the book 'Winning your Blood sugar battle: How to prevent and control type 2 diabetes' by Richard Furman, published in 2019, there are 3 major types, Gestational, Type 1, and Type 2. Gestational diabetes only occurs in pregnant women. They develop diabetes because they've never had it before and the diet their child has causes them to have odd cravings that may or may not spur on the diabetic process. Most women who develop Gestational diabetes later develop Type 2 diabetes after childbirth. Type 1 is where the term insulin resistance occurs. This type causes the pancreas to barely create and supply the body with insulin to help balance the body's energy level. In some cases, the pancreas cannot create insulin at all! Type 2 is when the pancreas can create insulin, but it has issues distributing it throughout the body... Nonetheless, diabetics can have ice cream. Despite popular belief, a diabetic still needs sugar in their diets. Marginally more than a non-diabetic, actually!"

Fun facts: "On the topic of sugar, did you know that a non-diabetic needs 24 grams of sugar and Diabetics need 30 grams of sugar a day to function normally? Awesome, huh?"

Body 3: "Back to Ice cream, as I mentioned before, there are many companies who manufacture ice cream for those who have dietary or health restrictions. Those who are lactose intolerant, there is lactose-free ice cream! Who here got the chocolate samples with chocolate chips? That sample doesn't have any lactose in it. There is a low-carb variant for those watching their carbs... Who got the vanilla sample with a V on their lid? You got the low-carb variant! Now, those who got Rocky Road and Vanilla Bean, you had regular ice cream made by 2 separate companies. Rocky road was made by Baskin Robin, and Vanilla Bean was made by Haagen Dazs. I literally learned how to pronounce that company's name last night."

Conclusion: "In total, Ice cream is one of the all-inclusive sweet treats known to America. You can eat it with cake, put it in hot drinks, except teas... I've found that is a terrible idea in my opinion. You can eat it by itself or in a float with Orange soda or root beer. You can eat ice cream anytime of the day and year and it has this nostalgic feel that warms you inside, despite being freezing cold. So, if you have lactose intolerance, or have a medical issue that bars you from having an abundance of creamy foods, it's ok. Ice cream is always there for you. Thank you for listening and I hope you enjoyed the ice cream samples!"

Chapter Text

I got a 78... A high c, but I'll take it

Chapter Text

<Dream: Yo yo Skizzlie-doo>

<Skizzleman: Oh god, who did you murder?>

<Dream: WhAt>

<Dream: nO>

<Dream: Need to pick your gooey computer of a brain!>

<Skizleman: Is this the consequence of being an adopted uncle?>

<Dream: Ye>

<Dream: Same place as last time, Skizz-a-doodle!>

<Skizzleman: You need help, kiddo>

<Skizzleman: Omw?>

Dream sat at the coffee shop while he downed another one of Weird's weird soda mixes. He was practically buzzing with excitement to see his uncle's friend, who is also like his uncle... Yeah, The hermits are basically a family within a family within a family... Fam-ception! "You ok, there?" Weird asked, cleaning up after another set of customers left. "Hm? Yeah! I'm meeting my favorite extrovert!" Dream smiled. "The one from before?" The pastel-clad kid asked, holding her left arm tightly. "Yep!" Dream said, smiling. In all honesty, He had this undying urge to crowd Skizz and make sure his newly appointed outside uncle is ok. 

Speaking of that crazy dude, the man stumbled into the shop, covered in leaves. "How did- There isn't a wind storm today, though..." Weird sighed, going to get a broom to sweep the leaves outside. "You ok, Skizz-man?" Dream smiled, holding out a warm to-go cup of hot chocolate. "You seem like you need this... I can get my son another one." Dream said. "You got a son!?" Skizz yelped, making Dream laugh. "Yeah... The server's been having a baby boom recently... My mentor got a kid, my best friends did too... Moms #2 and 3 got a young piglin as theirs, and I think we're planning a wedding?" Dream listed off, making Skizz smile. "Man, I remember when Imp and I would go around and plan out if we ever got married or had kids." Skizz laughed. "Nah, he's gotta worry about Purpled using his redstone as seasoning for his food... It kind of looks like that boy adopted Impulseas his guardian, since his original... Yea, I'll drop that subject while I still can..." Dream said, taking another sip of his drink. 

Skizz hopped in the seat across from him and smiled at the blond. "So, what's up, kiddo?" Skizz asked. "I need to know more about the life series..." Dream said. "Jeez, bud... Well, I can't tell you much from the more recent edition we did, since I was busy that whole time, but I think you can call Scott over, I think he called me after that and made me come over to his server and make him my famous cinnabuns." Skizz said. "Never had one of those..." Dream said, making the elder gasp in offense. "Never?" Skizz gawked, making the green-eyed speedrunner shake his head. "I'm gonna smack Dipple dot upside the head next time I see him..." Skizz sighed. "Why?" Dream asked, only to be completely ignored by the other. "Anywho! Grian sent me an invite to the next season of the life series!" Skizz smiled. "Really!? He's making another one!?" Dream asked, starry-eyed. "Yep! Say, since you're super invested in this, why don't you ask Grian if you can join this time?" Skizz asked. "I can't... He told me that I wasn't ready for it yet..." Dream huffed, pouting like a toddler who was told they couldn't go outside to play with their brothers and sisters on easter day. "Man, that's gotta suck... But! If I ever need a substitute, you're the first person I call if I don't see ya during the season, ok?" Skizz said. "Oh- Are you sure? I wouldn't know how to play you... I mean, I can barely pretend to be a damsel in distress for my son long enough for him to save me." Dream said.

"I'm sure you'd be a natural in that series..." Skizz said, jumping when his communicator began to beep loudly. "Darnit... Dipple dot's freaking out again... Talk to you soon, kid!" Skizz said, taking the hot chocolate and rushing out to leave just as Weird got back. "Where'd he go?" She huffed, looking around weirdly. "His best friend needs him." Dream explained. "Ah... Are you leaving as well?" She asked. "After I order another hot chocolate for my boy." Dream said. "Do you want to meet up with your other friend while you're here? Or maybe rent the space in the back for your meetings?" Weird asked, jabbing her finger to the back table in the corner where there was an abundance of free things just lying there. "We'll see... Maybe I could convince my partner to let me take him and our son here." Dream said. "Well, the offer still stands my friend..." Weird said before going back to their job. A loud bang of te front door alerted the two to what looked like Weird's twin brother. "My baby sister! I have arrived to relieve you of your burdens here!" He yelled. "Oh gods, the idiot's back..." She sighed, leaning on the broom in her hands as the boy skipped over. "Off! Give apron!" He yelled, making her roll her eyes. "How is it that you were born 7 minutes before me?" She sighed again, taking the lightly colored apron off and handing it to her brother. "No clue! Now take your break! I've got dis!" He said. "You mean like how you handle our mother's second marriage?" She teased. 

"You try accepting your chemistry teacher as your new dad." He said. "We had the same chem teacher!" She yelled, tapping her brother on the head. "I'm so glad Yogurt doesn't have any siblings..." Dream smiled, getting up and smiling at Weird. "Oh, wait! You wanted hot cocoa for your baby boy... I'll make it for you before you go!" Weird said, running to the counter before her brother could protest. "So... You have kids..." Her brother said. "I'm already in a relationship, kiddo... Your sister is like my best off-server friend. She basically knows the in's and out's of my life and she makes some good drinks, man." Dream said. The boy brightened up and smiled. "Good... She's been through a lot lately, and she tells me all about you and someone named Skizz all the time when you guys visit." He said. "Never did get your name..." Dream said, smiling when Weird held the to go cup out for him. "Name's Leland... You won't see me often, so don't bother knowing me." He said. "Don't mind my brother... He's a grumpy cat who actually loves people." Weird said, pushing Dream out of the shop before her brother dissected Dream for fun. "Bye, man! See you next time!" She said. 

~~~

When Dream got home, he was met with Yogurt doing Beckerson's hair with a determined face while Karl watched and directed him alongside Gem and Cleo. "Are you guys teaching Yogurt how to be a hairstylist?" Dream chuckled, setting the cups of good stuff on the counter he made out of quartz in the kitchen. "Well, Sorta? He wanted to know how Gem and I do our hair, and when we told him, he asked if he could learn... We tied to teach him with the two of us but turns out, we have no idea how to direct a kid in instructions... So we needed Karl, and he couldn't leave Beckerson on his own, since Sapnap took Slimenap out to get Jevin to teach the slime how to not disintegrate everything he touches, and that's how we got here with Yogurt playing with Beckerson's shorter hair." Cleo explained. "Ahh... So Hermitcraft things." Dream smiled. "Yup! Oh! Beefcalled for you and Fundy! He made a Trading card game and had all of us hermits draw for our stats... So now he's working on your cards!" Gem said. "A trading card game based on us?" Dream asked. "Mhm! Oh- And Grian wanted to talk with ya too! You're a busy bee today, dragon boy!" Gem smiled, handing Yogurt a pastel purple bow to put in Beckerson's hair. 

The blond in question sighed as he packed himself some food and gave Yogurt a kiss to his forehead before he left to go do the chores he had to do with other hermits. His first stop was Beef, smiling at the art he had made of him for his card. It was a simple picture of him lounging in a tree with a Boatem-themed hat over his face. "Dreamie! Hello! Welcome!" Beef said, hopping from the sand pile he was on top of to greet the green-clad player. "Hey, Beef! So, Cleo told me you called for me while I was off server?" Dream smiled. "Yes! You see, most of the hermits already have their cards made, except you, Fundy, Ghostbur, and th kiddos... So! I need you to walk over here, push those three buttons and tell me the results you get!" Beef said. "Ok?" Dream said, going to just that, pushing the here buttons under the three dispensers and getting 3 papers back. He did this three times before Beef let him go. 

He wonders what his card will be like... I mean, he's a speedrunner for prime's sake! While he flew to Grian's he noticed Sam Nook setting a forest on fire. Oh gods... "I feel like that's a Tommy and Tubbo issue there..." Dream grumbled to himself while he landed at Grian's base. "Hello? Grian? You here?" Dream yelled, listening to the echoing of his voice amongst the walls of Grian's base. "Heads up!" Dream heard, looking up to see Grian gliding down to him. "You're here! Awesome! Here! For you and whoever you think should join!" Grian beamed handing Dream a bracelet with three hearts on it, going from green to yellow to red, and a replica of the bracelet. "Is this-" Dream started,looking at Grian. "Yep! I think you're ready to embrace the chaos that comes with being one of those things. And what better way than to murder your best buds in a friendly death game?" Grian beams, making Dream cringe. "That entire sentence was full of contradictions and concerning phrasing." Dream said.

"Welp! You go and think about who you're draggin' along with us to fight for their lives! Bye now!!" Grian cheered, pushing Dream out of hisbase and then screaming for Pvp on helping him build a Jellie sanctuary... Dream looked at the jewelry and rubbed his thumb against one, reading the inscribed sentence: 'True character lies within your heart, not your name.' This confused Dream a bit before he remembered something Skizz mentioned when he first learned about 3rd life. 

~~~

"So, you're saying Grian blew up Scar on accident?" Dream asked. "Apparently so! And then he pledged his green life to Scar, which then led to a disaster of a monopoly, but you know what Grian said when we were transporting back to our old worlds?" Skizz said, making Dream shake his head. "He said: Thank you all, remember, your true character was shown through your sacrifices and strengths." Skizz said.

~~~

Dream knocked on the Foolish residence and shifted his feet, waiting for someone to answer. When the door did open, he was met with little Finnely sleepily looking at him. "Eh... It's Mr. Greenie!" He yelled. "Let him know dad's sad and is trying to eat all the spicy food he can eat!" Foolish jr. yelled back. Finney relayed the message Dream had heard and let him in, rubbing his small eyes a little. "You sleepy, man?" Dream asked. Finnely nodded and yawned. How could such a young child be so sleepy at noon? Normallyhe's bouncing off the walls, literally! "I finally mastered my shapeshifting... but I'm tired again..." The boy sniffed, climbing up Dream's leg and torso for the blond to hold him. "You sure you're part shark and not part koala?" Dream teased his nephew. He may not accept Foolish himself, but he'll always accept Foolish jr and Finnley as his family. Well, his hermit family... His real family is dead in his book. "Dream?" Big Foolish called, making the blond walk to what he assumed was the god's dining room, where he found the other with his head on the table, sniffling. "Why're you sulking?" Dream asked. Foolish waved his hand and Dream rolled his eyes.

"The bad man and his creeper said he wasn't needed anymore on this day a few years ago..." Finnley yawned. "Ok, let's get you into some jammies and put you to sleep mister." Dream said, his mama mode kicking in and making the boy in question smile at the action. After Dream helped Foolish jr. put his baby brother to sleep, Dream made sure big Foolish wasn't dead. "Oi, earth to the family favorite," Dream said, waving in from of his face. "Hm?" Foolish dopily answered. "Here." Dream said, putting the second bracelet on his arm. "Eh?" Foolish asked. "We're joining Grian and the other hermits in a death game in about 7 weeks, get your game face on, start practicing combat, get ready to fight for your life." Dream said, patting his head. 

As he left, Foolish jr. followed him and asked him if he'd watch over their dad while he was in that game with him. He couldn't say no to the kid's eyes! They were like two pools of acid green sludge that you can't help but agree. 

Chapter Text

The server was busy with the hermits who were involved in the life series rushing to finish projects or get as much of their videos done while they still could in those 7 weeks before they left for another death game. Grian can't wait to see Nightmare stretch his wings again, but he will make Dream wear a grounding collar so Nightmare doesn't get too out of hand. Though, Grian's still determining how Xelqua will react to Nightmare... He rarely loses control nowadays! 

<Grian: Can I request an audience with the goat?>

<Docm77: Me, right?>

<Grian: no>

<Grian: xB can I talk with your goat?>

<xBCrafted: yes?>

<Grian: great!>

<Grian: :) >

"Why does he need a goat?" Sapnap laughed, setting his communicator down to go and help fish Beckerson out from the family pool. "Papa Tap! Didya hear! Unkie Dee is gonna go and kill people!" Slimenap cheered from his spot in the chicken pen, getting slime all over his favorite chicken. "He's WHAT!?" Sapnap yelled, dropping the net they use to get Beckerson out when he doesn't wanna leave. The blaze looked over at the little boy with a panicked look, making both the child and the chicken pray for Dream's safety. When the boy strapped on his elytra and set off to the Taken household, Beckerson's head popped out from the water and giggled. "Dad's a worry wart." He said. "I pray unkie Dee... He was so excited to beat up people..." Slimenap sniffled, getting out of the pen to clean off his chickie. It's odd how fast these babies grow up... It feels like a year ago, Beckerson was sobbing over spilled water... (It has been a year since then, Loser)

Sapnap slammed head first into the waiting door of Dream's home where the blonde was looking at his stopwatch and shook his head. "I expected you like three hours ago, dude... What's up?" Dream said, snickering at the leaves Sap shook his head. "You're going to be a death game!?" Sap yelled. "Yup... How'd you find out?" Dream asked. "Slimenap," Sapnap said.

"He almost made it... He almost got the golden prize... Ok, yes. Grian gave me a bracelet and said 'Choose someone else to join us since Ren doesn't wanna do it again and Mumbo is still traumatized from the last one' in his own way, he didn't actually say that, but from the stories Scar and Impulse's bud, Skizzleman, tells me... It's gonna be fun!" Dream beamed. Sapnap sighed and held Dream's face in his hands. "Nightmare, I need you to be honest with me... Do you swear you will not shove Dream back into that bad mindset again? Do you swear you will only act when Dream lets you and do you swear you will give him back control when he wants it back?" Sapnap listed, watching Dream's green turn purple-red. "I can only promise so much, Blazeling... You're asking a raging forest fire to stop burning on a windy day... There's a high chance things can go severely wrong in a flash and I will need to take action to keep us in the game." Nightmare said in honesty. And that little gremlin rarely tells the truth unless threatened by Exdee, Drista, X, Grian, False, and Stress. "You better make him come back normal or so help me... I will make Grian do the thing again." Sapnap threatened. 

The watcher rolled their eyes and let Dream retake control, where the blond blinked at him. "Now that you're heart to heart with my local demon is over, could you please let go of my face, Sap? That spot hurts." Dream said, smiling weakly as Sap let his face go. "More of a reason you shouldn't go..." Sapnap reasoned. "Look Sap, I already gave my spare to Foolish Sr. as a way to rekindle our sibling relationship that is still dead in my books, but he's going through a rough spot right now, and what other way to deal with that than to kill each other 3 times?" Dream said. "Did you not hear the last words of what you just made flap through our gums?" Sapnap asked. "I heard them... I mean, I have a literal script of the what-ifs and responses to this conversation on my shulker full of useless junk." Dream said.

The ravenette groaned and facepalmed, looking at his childhood friend all while questioning how this dumbass managed to get possessed, locked up in his mind, become a villain and a prisoner of his own server, and got a husband and child all in the span of his 20 player years in one go. "You're a hazard to society..." Sapnap sighed. "Yep! And I'm Fundy's hazard to society!" Dream said in a prideful manner. "That isn't an achievement, D..." Sapnap sighed more, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Say, I think I should tell George too... That idiot might just waltz on in here and think I got kidnapped." Dream said, getting his ings out and going to fly to his other friend's house with Sap in tow. When they landed, Dream shoved the door open to see Marshal attempting to play the flute. "Heya Marshie!" Dream said, making the boy smile and wave. "Where's your mushroom dad?" Dream asked, earning a finger being pointed to George's garden. "Oh boy... The Mushie's doing Shrommer things..." Sapnap teased. "Please do not set fire to anything here Sap... We will get higher than Impulse after he ate an entire double chest's worth of red amethyst thinking they were his candy." Dream said, making Sapnap cackle. "But that was funny, man! He tried to fight a stone pillar!" Sap laughed. "Uncle Dream... Did you ever learn to play the flute?" Marshal asked. "Nope... In all honesty, I only know how to sing well enough to trick a siren... And that took me about 3 years to perfect?" Dream hummed. "Oh- Wait, wha-" Marshal began before George came back. 

"I know already, Exdee came home telling me how his brother is going to end up dead in a ditch on a server he can't go to while his family here won't know what happened to him... I know... Why do you wanna go anyways?" George asked. "Grian invited me and said bring someone and I am, It's the Fool of Ish's!" Dream said. "Besides, Mama Stress keeps telling me I need to rekindle the brotherly relationship we once had as kids... But it was really me trying to lock him in a box and send him far far away... You can't do that in a death game known for betrayal, alliances, odd family dynamics that make the lore of the players involved more convoluted the longer the series goes on. You know?" Dream rambled, looking George in his brown, colorblind eyes that seemed to gain deeper eye bags by the day. Does DreamXD ever let this man sleep? "He worries for you... Welp, you better prepare... You have about 48 days till you leave for who knows how long and come back either traumatized or with a massive ego." George said, making the two leave so he could help Marshal with his flute-playing skills... (Man, I wish I knew how to play the flute, all I know how to play are the Viola, Drums, Guitar, and Kazoo)

~~~

Beef nodded as he looked at the recently made cards for his TCG. "This is gonna be an OP card, dude." Beef laughed to himself as he looked at Sapnap's rare and Nightmare's ultra rare cards side by side. Whoever got one of these would be unstoppable if they played them correctly. "I think I should make counters for these guys... Oh! I know! Let's see, I still need the kiddos, so maybe they can dampen them if played by the opposing hermit... Nightmare desperately cares for nothing, but since he and Dream are the same, and Nightmare can only be played if Dream's hit points reach about 180...  Maybe if the opposing hermit played a Fundy or Yogurt card, they could negate- No! Dampen the attack points of Nightmare's attacks, as Dream would be fighting back to not hurt his family, BRILLIANT BEEFIE! YOU GENIUS!" Beef rambled, all while planning the next batch of cards needed to be made... Little did he know, there was an entire crowd of hermits watching and listening to him spill the secrets of the TCG.

"Who's gonna tell him that we know?" Pearl asked. "Nah let him marinate... The best Beef is a motivated Beef... Next to Chaos Beef.." Joe said. "Like Scar... There's so many sides to that dude... One second he's intense and focused, the next he's off chasing butterflies and ladybugs..." Ren said. "And when he finally catches said bug, he shakes it around in his hands before letting it go, watching it wobble about as it tries to fly." Cub said fondly, while everyone looked at him like he had spoken the forbidden language. "Then there's Chaos Scar..." Cleo said, smiling at the memories of an unhinged Scar in the life games chasing people to swindle their stuff off them. (Totally not referencing the time he dropped a TNT minecart on top of Cleo's head)

While the group conversed about random things while observing a wild VintageBeef, said wild hermit was rambling more about counterattacks Karl could have on Sapnap... His current favorite is 'My husband's kryptonite' where Karl blows and kiss and wink towards his hubby, making Sapnap flustered, rendering his attack to have a 50% chance of a miss for 3 turns. It's a one time only move, so use it wisely... Beckerson and Slimenap share a card, where the two have separate attacks, but he's not sure what yet?

Chapter Text

The lifers begin to pack up their mindsets for the game while the family lifers struggle to do so. Take Foolish for example! Finnley has not once, nor twice... But he has held Foolish and Foolish Jr. Hostage twice with a metal fork heated up to probably 2,000 degrees Celsius... Hey, he's a godling... Thems the weird ones... They do stuff normal people would die doing. Like holding a hot ass fork and threatening their dad and big bro... Or Yogurt, who has buried Dream's suitcase of... Two outfits.. and refused to tell him where he stuck it... Because he forgot where he put it... Sorta... He knows it's by Etho's waterwheel! Was it to the left or right? Uh... Ghostbur knows, Friend can sniff it out! Where did that awesome sheep go!? 

Oh! And Pvp! That boy flipped the base inside out and upside down when his dads and aunt mentioned going away to kill each other. He cried and begged them to not do it, practically calling himself a used orphaned dragon. Which, out of context is a very bad choice of words in one sentence... Oh- It seems that Tubbo is attempting to calm the raging fire that is Pvp... Let's tune in, shall we?

"Yo, Vee... You good?" Tubbo asked. "No! Dad and Pops are leaving with Auntie Pearlie to kill each other!" Pvp huffed. Tubbo whistled and shook his head in disbelief. "No... How dare they leave us!?" Tubbo gasped, going to hug his brother tightly. The young god hugged his big brother back, huffing. "Tubbo! Not you too!" Scar yelled. He was currently being held hostage by a giant teddy bear False and Gem made Pvp in case Grian and Pearl were being too harsh on the boy... Now he's using this very bear as a weapon of mass destructio- No... He's just making it bear hugs his dads and aunt... 100% something anyone with magic would do if they loved their family. 

"I mean... I was abandoned! I can relate to Vee!" Tubbo said, kissing his baby brother's hair. "We're not abandoning you guys! Grian, tell them!" Pearl huffed, wiggling to get free from Sir Fluffems' huge arms. "Wha- You were the one who said 'Hey, Pvp... Your dads and I along with some more of us are gonna leave for a few weeks and kill each other and we even made a food dispersion system for you.' Pearl, you said those exact words while we were having dinner last night!" Grian huffed. "I mean, I didn't sugarcoat it like Scar did!" Pearl said. Scar made a noise of protest and used his vex magic to bop Pearl with a paper. "You see!? They're leaving!" Pvp dramatically peeped, going limp in Tubbo's arms to pretend he was dead. "Oh- Look what you guys did... You killed the baby panda!" Tubbo gasped, fake crying as he held his brother's limp body. "You know, from an outside view, this looks like a bad soap opera..." Ranboo said while he held Micheal by the back of his shirt. The little piglin was trying to get into Grian's prank stash. What? Micheal and Shroud had an argument and Micheal was gonna finish this 'Da Hermit way'... I'm concerned by what that means!

"It'll only be what? Like 8 to 9 weeks tops!" Grian said. "If Jimmy dies first." Scar said. "Jimmy always dies first... He's a canary for void sake." Pearl said. "Poor Solidarity... He's just there for fun." Ranboo sighed, not really knowing the dude, but he did know that Tango had some fun stories about the man and his affinity to dying. Though, the half and half boy seemed a little discouraged when Tango would tell him that everyone would tease him for it or pick on him. "I think it's a sign... He's the signal for the end!" Tubbo said, petting his brother's hair. "Look, Peeper... How about we let Dad and Pops and Aunt Pearl go on their... Kill-cation... And while we're waiting for them to come home, we can play Mr. Suma's escape game!" Tubbo said. "Mr. Tsunami?!" Pvp asked, his eyes lighting up. "Yeah! Then, we can keep playing over and over again until we use up all of their money!" Tubbo kept going, ignoring the protests of the other three in the bear hug. "Ok! Can we go now!?" Pvp asked, dropping the spell on his big bear to climb up Tubbo's back. "Sure! We'll see you guys in some odd weeks!" Tubbo said, holding his brother's legs tightly and running off towards X's base so they could beg him if they can play test his escape rooms. "I'll keep an eye on them while you three are gone, If anything, I'd happily take Pvp to our base while you're away," Ranboo said, hoisting up Micheal in a fireman carry. "You can?!" Scar gasped, hopping up Sir Fluffems to retrieve the construction hat he had made. 

"We can. And when you come back home, we'll get him to you so he can tell you all about the adventures Tubbo will take him on." Ranboo said. The three adults sighed in relief that while they're gone, Pvp will have a voice of reason with him and he won't turn out to be a chaos gremlin, like everyone else on the server around him. "Thank you, Boo... I don't know what we'd do without you." Grian said. "I do... Tubbo would be wanted for committing 72 counts of war crimes, Pvp will have a murder body count of 500, most of them will be Scar in one way or another, Dream and Nightmare would be constantly fighting over control in their body, which would lead to Dream ultimately tearing himself apart physically to escape his demon... And somehow, someway... Mumbo would still be a potato." Ranboo listed off. "You sure he's not got any magic in that lanky body of his?" Scar asked Grian. "Other than being an enderman... He's clean." Grian replied. 

~~~

Meanwhile, Dream was busy trying to find his bag of 2 hoodies, 2 pairs of pants, one cargo, and other jeans, one t-shirt and one sweater, and finally, he had an empty bottle stashed in the clothing. He wasn't sure what he'd need a bottle for... But he couldn't trust Nightmare on his own. This explains why Etho found the speedrunner covered head-to-toe in mud, grass, gravel, and sand while his iron shovel was close to breaking into a million pieces. "You good there, Florida Man?" Etho asked in a joking manner. "You gotta let that die, Etho..." Dream huffed, dragging out the buried drawstring bag he made for his stuff. "I mean, you did smack a goat with a pan when he tried to rush at you." Etho said. "You'd do the same if it was aiming for your kid!" Dream yelled to him, shooting a glare at the masked hermit. "I would've, yeah... But I don't really have kids?" Etho said.

Don't worry Etho... You'll soon understand Dream's words soon... Trust us readers here... You know the pain.

"You know, I'm going to die of laughter if I find out you gain a family or at least child out of this, I swear." Dream said. "I'm not dad material," Etho said. "That's what I said, until Yogurt picked me and said: 'You're my mom now, we're having pie tonight!' and clung to me the whole time." Dream said. Right as they finished this conversation, their communicators pinged.

<Grian: Lifers>

<Grian: R u reafy!?>

<ZombieCleo: Yup>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Murder!>

<BdoubleO100: WHhoooooo>

<Etho: Mhm>

<PearlescentMoon: Killings!>

<Rendog: So glad I backed outta this one>

<BdoubleO100: WhAt>

<BdoubleO100: but- Da mems>

<Tango: Death>

<Tango: murder>

<Tango: choppy choppy bitties>

<Dream: Oh no>

<Dream: he's plotting>

<FoolishG: Dream, do I have to?>

<Dream: Yes or the gingerbread man gets it>

<Punz: *gasp*>

<Punz: Not the gumdrop button!>

<Sapnap: SHUT UP GINGY>

<Grian: Children>

<Grian: I'm going to be surrounded by children.>

<Dream: Luv ya!>

Dear gods, may the next season of the life series be an easy one...

Chapter Text

"Grian! I have to go to the bathroom!" Bdubs yelled, making Grian groan. "I asked you if you needed to go 7 minutes ago!" Grian yelled back, continuing to lead the group. "Oh! The Empires SMP is coming up! Maybe we can stop there and use their bathrooms? Please, Grian??" Dream suggested. "No, we can't... I'll get distracted and bother my brother for another mother." Grian said. "I'd like to see my rancher before we kill each other." Tango added on, whistling a little bit. "Simp." Grian sighed before redirecting them to the Empires portal and requesting access to enter before briefly getting said access. "In we go, we have 30 minutes and then we need to leave." Grian said, letting the lifer hermits rush off to find an emperor and ask if they could use the bathroom or to bother someone they knew... Foolish stuck with Dream while the blonde sniffed out Scott, tackling the colorful fedora wearing emperor and purring at when the other hugged him back. "Hi, hatchling. What brings you here?" Scott asked, patting the blond's hair. "We're joining you guys in the life game... And we  help understanding what's about to happen." Dream sniffled. "Ah... Alright, I'll get Lizzie, Joel, and Jimmy here to help explain and mentally prepare you two." Scott said, getting his comm out and messaging the 3 to come down to Chromia and that a little dragon and shark need some help.

Five minutes later, and Jimmy crash-landed on top of Foolish and perched on the tallest's head, making both Scott and Dream chuckle. "Wassup, Scotty!?" Jimmy yelled, clinging to Foolish's shark headdress and swaying slightly. Foolish struggled to stay upright, despite being used to Grian perching on top of his head and tapping him for attention. "Well, Jimmy... Dream and Foolish here are going to be joining us in the next life game... I figured you could help them come to terms with what may happen during it." Scott hummed. "Ah... So, here's the low-down-" Jimmy started before he was cut off by another set of voices. "You're letting the canary explain what a death game is and how it works!? He dies first all the time!" 

"Joel... This time will be different, I can feel it!" Jimmy huffed. The other laughed at his confidence. "You said that three times already..." Joel said. The other was barely taller than Foolish, making the shark squint at him and wonder how tall his god form is. "You're a god?" Foolish asked, looking Joel up and down then circling him. Jimmy had hopped off Foolish by this time and sat by Dream. "Oh dear..." Lizzie said, sitting by the other two. "So... That's the brother your mum abandoned you for?" Jimmy asked, pointing at Foolish circling Joel still. "Yup... You can see why, huh?" Dream groaned. "He's like a dog?" Jimmy asked. "He's obideient?" Lizzie asked. "He's... Can I say what I want to say?" Scott asked. "Is it 18+ or 17 below?" Dream asked. "17 and a half." Scott said. "Go ham." Dream responded. "He's got the build of a brick wall... I'm sure he was a twig when she found him." Scott said. Dream sucked his teeth and shook his head. "Nope... He was like every other kid... Physically fit, bundle of energy and a minion of trouble..." Dream sighed, shaking his head when Foolish tackled Joel and tried to wrestle him. "So, your brother is a god, right?" Jimmy hummed. "Yep... I take it Joel is too?" Dream said. "For this season of Empires... Yeah... It's gotten to his head." The sheriff huffed, tipping his ten-gallon hat in annoyance. 

"To be fair... You chose a terrible theme when Joel is involved." Lizzie said. "Still! Tumble Town is a quaint little western-themed place in a mesa... It shouldn't be a target for so many pranks." Jimmy said. "Oh- The life series." Scott reminded them, walking over and pulling the two gods apart and dragging them to the other two like they were children being scolded by their mother. "How is he-" Dream began before Lizzie cut him off. "Don't question it, he's odd." She said. 

"So, what's your questions?" Scott asked. "Do we remember what happens in full detail afterwards?" Dream asked. "Yes, but you need to remember, whatever happens, it was because of the circumstances that occurred beforehand," Scott said. "And do your best to establish good relationships with everyone, since relationships and alliances matter most... Until everyone turns red. Then you're on your own mostly." Jimmy said. "I was confused for most of the time in my run." Lizzie said. "Wasn't it Scott who got you out on Last Life?" Jimmy asked. "Uh, no... The one with huge eyes did." Lizzie did, making her hands the size of plates. "Ah, Bdubs. Yeah, under that sweet mask, is a murderous, caffeinated gopher..." Dream said. "Or maybe a cat?" Dream continued. "Oh, also, remember whatever happens in the game doesn't matter outside. We're all friends still..." Joel said. "Yeah, Joel spent the night on the couch when he came back after Last Life.." Lizzie said. "You didn't make him sleep on the couch, did you!?" Scott gasped. Lizzie nodded in triumph. "He got to 5th place! I told him you better not expect a bed at home if you don't win. And he didn't!" She said. "And you two say I'm the competitive one." Joel sighed. 

Foolish and Dream smiled at the couple's antics and jumped when Jimmy jumped up and screamed. "MY RANCHER!!!!!" He yelled, running to Tango when the blond was coming to retrieve Dream and Foolish. Tango let the cowboy jump onto him while he smiled and pat the man's back. "He's a koala..." Foolish gasped. "You know, for a busy sheriff, you seem intent of not letting me go." Tango hummed before looking at Dream. "You and your bro ready to go to the Life SMP yet?" Tango asked. "Yeah... We're ready." Dream said. "God! You and me are arm wrestling when we see each other on that server!" Foolish yelled. "I won't be a god then, but sure!" Joel called, getting elbowed by Lizzie. "The same thing goes as last time, no wins, no bed." She said. 

Wow, Lizzie... Threaten his bed space....

Chapter Text

The Lifers dropped into their new server with a collective groan. "Ow! I'll never get used to that!" Bdubs huffed, rubbing his back where it hurt. "Feel bad for me, man... I got a tree branch in my hair..." Impulse sighed out dramatically. "You have short hair, goofball." Tango laughed, brushing off the leaves in the redstoner's brown hair. "Ok, before the others get here... Who will explain this to D and Fooly?" Etho said. "Grian!" The others yelled. He nods and gives the two the low down of what's about to happen, how the game works, and the rules. "So what I'm getting is, that if my name is the color of my hoodie, I can't kill anyone... But when it turns to Imp's shirt color, I can only attack whatever green names are here, then when I get to your sweater's color, I'm just a feral gremlin." Dream explained. "Yeah. Also, you cannot attack anyone of the same color name unless we're all red. Then it's free game." Grian said. 

"Ah... So do we wait here?" Foolish asked. "Yeah! The game can't start unless all the players are present, but you can use this time to talk with your families or ask us questions. Remember, don't take whatever happens here personally... It's all fun and games and a test of character and a building of trust, ok?" Grian said. Both brothers looked at each other and snorted. "I mean it. Ask Impulse, he's learned you can't trust Bdubs when clocks are introduced or Scar... He knows I'm a loose cannon when these come about." Grian said. "Scar's a menace." Etho huffed. "You were an ally of my enemy!" Scar huffed back. "He was also stupid enough to make his home of operations out of wool." Cleo laughed. 

The hermits bickered back and forth about the past life games and how each of their faults made up for content. "Oh my goodness! Hatchling!!" Dream heard, making the blond perk up and beam brightly. "Scotty!" Dream cheered, getting up from his spot and running to hug the cyanette. "Oh! Hello! Your face scales are growing out!" Scott said with pride in his voice. Dream purred softly at the soothing feeling of Scott's cold fingers on his face. Wait- "Why're you cold, Scott?" Dream asked, pouting lightly. "Sorry, I had to mess with some Ice before I left the Empires SMP... But it feels so nice here! And on the plus side, you're going to be able to let yourself go cray without being looked at like a monster!" Scott cheered. 

"How is he the one to say that in such a cheerful voice?" Impulse asked Tango. "Um... Uh- Smajor-ifacation-ness?" Tango sputtered. Wow, classic TangoTek in his natural environment. "Oh! Dreamboat!?" Dream heard, making the dragon's head perk up and flip around to see where his name was called before his sees fell on a familiar chaotic, sleeveless, suit-wearing man. "Uncle Skizz!" Dream yelled, letting go of Scott to run to Skizzleman and tackle him in a hug. 

You see, Dream has this way of... Ecstatic hugs? He used to have the shy, one-armed, loose hugs when he first started recovery, now he's got the hugs of a 7-year-old who just saw their favorite family member and managed to break free from their parents' hands to tackle the other. Those are Dream's hugs now. Most of the time, the person he tackles ends up on the floor with him. "Hey! It's shark boy! Tim, it's sharky!" They heard, making Foolish turn to see Joel and Jimmy as... Not Joel and Jimmy?

"Timmy!!!" Grian yelled, hugging his friend. (well, they bros, but this is a game, no family here) "Hi, G... You ready to kill each other?" Jimmy asked. "Tim... You know you're going to die way before the big wars start." Grian said. "This'll be different! I can feel it in my bones." Jimmy said. "No- Tim, that is your wings regrowing back... Your bones are re-hollowing themselves out." Grian explained. Jimmy huffed and made a mocking noise towards Grian before going to hide with Tango and Impulse, glaring at Grian. 

"Joel! Arm wrestle!" Foolish yelled, making the brunette curse under his breath. "I do not wanna do that." Joel said. "Too bad, you're his hyperfixation, just hope he doesn't make a statue of you and make a religion off you while those goes on." Dream said, grimacing about DreamXD and how his life got ruined the day that god found his brother interesting. "Remember, all your defining traits are what you wear, how you act, and what color your name is here... So Foolish, you cannot zap someone with lightning. Don't give me those eyes. You know I'm not changing the rules for you. If Tango has to rely on his horrendous PVP skills, you need to rely on your natural skills too." Grian said, making Tango squawk in offense. "Oi! I may openly admit I'm bad at fighting, but I at least loved being with my soul bound." Tango shot back. "You try being stuck with the same person for three seasons in a row!" Grian said. Tango pointed to Impulse with an unamused face, making his fellow redstone nerd gasp.

"Hey! You love me!" Impulse yelled, punching Tango's arm. Tango yelled and began to run away from him, laughing as he was chased by Impulse and Bdubs. Impulse was yelling about how he was going to push Tango into a pond and Bdubs yelling for Impulse to not do that and that the game hadn't started yet. "Impulse! No! Bad redstone nerd! Down boy! Heel!" Bdubs yelled as he chased after the two other boomers. "He's not a dog, Bdu- Oh gods, I'll be back..." Cleo sighed, walking towards the three boys like an exhausted mother. Little did she know, she was about to become an exhausted mother of 2 chaos children...

~~~

"Ok, you have 24 hours to live... Good luck!" Grian yelled, running past the group, making everyone scramble for groups to be in. Dream quickly ran towards the tree line and punched at a tree. "Ugh, I always did hate this part." Dream sighed, not noticing Foolish hop next to him. "What?" Foolish asked. "Punching a tree for wood... I mean, I get it, we're in a new world and all, but why?" Dream said. The two brothers stuck together and got as much wood as they could before going underground and finding coal. "Woah, look at this, Dream!" Foolish called, pointing to a lush cave. (did they have a lush cave in limited life? They do now!) Dream hopped over and gasped. "You found this!?" Dream yelled. "Our base of operations!" Foolish called. "But, there's one way in and one way out... We'd be stuck if a fight happened..." Dream said. "How about this can become out doomsday hideout?" Dream offered. "But that's no fun..." Foolish said. "Ok, fine! We'll live here, but We need alliances. I'll head to The people we don't really know, you go to people we do know." Dream said.

Foolish nodded and ran off, marking the way home with redstone dust he found. Dream turned and left to find Bigb and Martyn, since he knew Skizzly-doo and Scott. Foolish didn't, but a friend of Dream is his for now! After running into an amethyst geode and harvesting a few shards, he began to climb up to the surface. Not long after he breaches the dirt, he runs into Bdubs, Cleo, and Scar, tilting his head in confusion. "What's up you guys?" Dream asked. "We're the Cockers!" Scar yelled, making Cleo correct him to CLOCK-ers. He gets his tongue twisted. "I- Wha? Wait, say that again, Scar..." Dream said, making the vex groan and say that they were the Cobbers. "Still wrong, but I'll take Cleo's word for your names... How's everything so far?" Dream asked. "I've somehow been adopted by these two." Cleo sighed. 

"Mom's trying to get rid of us and we're not leaving!" Bdubs laughed, patting a chicken's side before stabbing it. Dream flinched at the brutality the big eyed man displayed. "Holy- Uh, right! I have a gift!" Dream said, digging through his bag and pulling out a piece of amethyst. He handed it to Cleo, knowing she's the most responsible out of those three. "Think of it as a.. Uh... Um... Alliance token? Or you could make it a spyglass and do whatever, I don't control you." Dream said, looking away to pout. Cleo cooed at his actions and pat his hair. "We'll be allies. Ok? Where's Foolish?" She asked. "I have him on a wild goose chase of friendship." Dream said, jumping in confusion when the words: The Boogeyman will be chosen in 1 minute flashed in front of him. 

"What's a boogeyman?" Dream asked. The other three hummed and nodded. "It's a player chosen by the game to kill another player." Cleo explained, groaning at the impending chaos and paranoia that will ensue. "Why?" Dream asked. "To add spice into this morbid game." Bdubs hummed, playfully bopping Scar with a stick. "Hey! Why me!? Mom, Bdubs hit me with a stick!" Scar yelled, pointing at Bdubs while he hid behind Cleo. The Zombified woman sighed and looked at Dream. "Is this how you got Yogurt?" She asked, making Dream laugh. "Sorta, Yogurt climbed on my back and held my head while I did stuff." Dream sighed, frowning slightly. 

"I miss my babies already..." He sniffled. Cleo put her hand on his shoulder and smiled. "Don't worry, we only do these sessions for about 3 or so hours and then we stop and connect with our friends, well- Families now with the little ones running around Hermitcraft now..."She said. "Yeah! I remember when we first started, Joe was super worried about Cleo that he'd call her and make sure she was eating well and that she was going to make sure she'd be positive the whole time!" Bdubs yapped, making the zombie lightly smack the already battered dude on the arm.

The boogeyman is being chosen in...

5

4

3

2

1

You are...

Chapter Text

"Not the boogey!" Scar cheered, looking at the other three. "Nope." Dream said. "Not the boogs." Bdubs said. "Not the boogey." Cleo said. "Cool, so Bdubs is lying..."Scar said, defaulting to his typical distrusting nature towards Bdubs in these games. Seriously, that gremlin of a sleeper is a force to be reckoned with. He's got this innocent smile and you'd believe he dropped a thing of tomato sauce on himself even though it looks awfully close to blood. "Wha!? I'm not lying!" Bdubs huffed, throwing his arms in disbelief. "I can't believe you! You kill his boyfriend before you guys start dating and you're automatically the boogeyman first session!" Bdubs huffed. "I mean... You literally said 'Yeah... I AM THE BOOGEYMAN!' and stabbed him like... 7 times?" Cleo said. "I had just given him one of my 7 lives too..." Scar sniffled. "Well, If you think about it, you saved his life!I last remember seeing his name yellow then green then yellow again, He would've been red if you hadn't!" Bdubs huffed. "Mom, can I stab him?" Scar asked. "Why are you- No, Scar, put the sharpened stick down!" Cleo yelled while Dream held Scar by his armpits. "I've got son number 1, Clees!" Dream laughed while the taller man wiggled to get free. 

The four spent some time chopping trees and collecting saplings for more wood in case they would need it. Dream knew he and Foolish were going to need it with whatever the shark had planned. "Oh! Dream! I must warn you, don't trust anyone. No matter what, don't trust us. Ok? We love you and we want you and Foolish to come out of this not as traumatized as we all did on our first round through." Cleo said. "Yea, Poor Grian could never leave Scar alone again. Nor could he look at Ren without trying to kill him." Bdubs said. By this time Scar's mind had finally caught up from Bdubs had said eariler and stuttered. "Wait- Don't call Grian my boyfriend when we do these things... We're enemies until proven otherwise." Scar said. "So... Bed buddies?" Dream asked, making Scar groan. "No..." Scar huffs. "Scar, Just accept that this is the best I can describe your situation in my head." Dream said. 

"I mean, you have a son, a bunch of nephews and a husband... Yeah, you have no alone time for yourself, do ya?" Bdubs asked. "No... Well, I'm off! I gotta find BigB and Martyn... Try not die you guys!" Dream said, skipping away from the trio and going to find those two. He soon found Pearl and BigB and went to greet the unknown one. "Aunt Pearl! Hi!" Dream yelled, rushing to hug her. The woman smiled and hugged him, ruffling his hair. "Hello scaly boy! Oh! I want you to meet a friend of ours, BigB." Pearl said. "Oh! Hi! Here!" Dream beamed, shoving an amethyst shard into the darker man's hands. "Oh! Thanks man!" he said, making Dream beam in pride. "You're welcome. Consider it our alliance chip! Good luck you guys!" Dream chirped, hopping off towards Spawn. 

Skizzleman was slain by Smajor1995

<Grian: I see the rules don't apply to you>

<Smajor1995: He was right there!>

<ImpulseSV: Skizzle!>

<Dream: Was that the boogey!?>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Dang, 2 hours down already.>

Dream ran to Skizz while he groaned about Scott being a jerk. "Skizzly! Are you ok?" Dream asked, kneeling next to the man. "Man! Scott's a fricking JERK!" The man huffed. "I'm sorry, man... Oh, hey guys!" Dream said, waving at Scar, Cleo, and Bdubs. "Oh my goodness, Skizz, are you alright?" Cleo asked going to offer him her condolences. "You leave for one second to talk with someone and bam! Axe to the face!" Skizz sobbed. Before the four could reassure Skizz that everything was ok, another Boogeyman was being chosen. 

Thankfully Dream was safe again. The group moved Skizz away from spawn and let him vent to them in his admirable animated speech patterns. Skizz kept yapping while Dream watched Scar get yeeted into an underground pond. While this happened, Bdubs stabbed Skizz again. Dream jumped in surprise when he looked at his comm. 

Skizzleman was slain by BdoubleO100

<Grian: AGAIN>

<Dream: Skizzle!>

<Skizzleman: HOW DARE>

Dream ran to where Skizz was simmering and laughed a little. "You're having some bad luck, man!" Dream laughed. "That's 4 hours! I've lost 4 hours in the span of 30 minutes!" Skizz huffed. "Do you want to kill me to get 30 back?" Dream asked. "No." He said sharply, puffing his face. "When I turn yellow, I'll kill Bdubs." He said. "oh..." Dream said, backing his head back a little. "Dreamy!!!"Dream heard, making both him and Skizz look up. "What's up, Foolish?" Dream asked. "We've got allies!" Foolish said, holding up a bunch of pufferfish and fish. All named, all in buckets, all with cute derpy faces. 

"Alright, Foolish, you get back to the base and start getting comfy, ok?" Dream said. "Ok... D! Is he coming with us?" Foolish asked. "If he wants... Do you, Skizz?" Dream asked. "I don't wanna impose on ya... I'll be fine... You two just be careful and be truthful with each other, I don't wanna see your names in the chat as death messages." Skizz said, pointing at the two. Both nodded and saluted him. "Yes General Skizzleman!" Dream and Foolish said simultaneously before running off and going home.

Well, that was an interesting first session! 

Chapter Text

Dream and Foolish began making their lush cave into a home, placing dirt, sand, and farmland down for their survival in case a war broke out on the surface before the yellow names rose. "So, what first?" Foolish asked. "We make farms, we survive... And if need be, we abandon this place and split up from each other." Dream said. "Your inner manhunt is poking its ugly head out again." Foolish said, snickering at his brother's huffs while he whittled down a stick to a dagger. "Gotta prepare. We have 8 hours, or well, 8 deaths until we're yellow." Dream said. "Unless we get Boogey-ed." Foolish replied, mining out some of the wall nearby to get some stone, clay, iron, and moss. "Yeah... Then we lose 2 hours." Dream said. The two brothers worked on their bunker until they heard a scream above them. "You didn't!" They hear. "Uh oh..." The two say together, looking at their comms and seeing the death messages.

ZombieCleo blew up

GoodtimeswithScar blew up

"Oh my god..." Foolish gasped. Dream smiled and began typing.

<Dream: WOOOOO>

<Dream: DEATH MESSAGE>

<Grian: How did you get sugar?>

<Dream: NO SHOOGS>

<Dream: ADRENELINE>

<FoolishG: Did you even spell that right?>

<Dream: NU>

<GoodtimeswithScar: Aw, he's rebelling already>

<Skizzleman: adrenaline>

<ImpulseSV: Dang>

<Dream: SPELT RONG NO CARE>

<Dream: ONLY DEF!>

<Smajor1995: Oh no you've released chaos hatchling>

<Dream: >:) >

"You're fricking insane, man." Foolish sighed, looking at his brother. Dream smiled and went back to work, crafting a fork for his own personal joke. "Hehe... Now I can fork people's eyeballs." Dream evilly giggled. Foolish sighed and got back to making his food farms. He placed down some torches before he began to plant the wheat and carrots. "Hey, have you found any gold or iron yet?" Foolish asked. "No... But I can mine and see if I can find some?" Dream hummed. "Nah, I'm good. We can manually farm these." Foolish said. "Sometimes I wish Grian gave me more invite tokens so we could drag Sam here and make him do Redstone stuff..." Dream sighed. "No, he'd make another prison and round up all the red names if he could." Foolish said. Dream snorted and nodded. "Mans would grab Skizz and toss him in a box." Dream laughed. 

They finished not long after, probably 10 or so more minutes and they were sitting in their separate hidey holes while the surface peeps were killing each other. "D... Do you hate hate me? Like, if you were spontaneously turn red and had the option of killing me, would you?" Foolish asked Dream. "I don't hate hate you... Am I still jealous? Absolutely. I'd only kill you if the circumstances meet my expectations." Dream said, humming an old song Puffy used to sing to them when they were kids. It was similar to a song you'd hear in a Legend of Zelda game. "Why do you still sing that song?" Foolish asked. "Because it's my only positive memory of her... The only thing I took with me while I suffered in that box." Dream sighed. The two yapped some more until the session end was called. It was at this moment, Dream's comm went off with Sapnap's ringtone... 

Which was 'Just did a bad thing' by Bill Wurtz. Dream hummed along as he let the comm ring away. "You gonna answer that?" Foolish asked. "I should, shouldn't I?" Dream chuckled, answering and smiling at Sapnap's relieved groan. "Bro! You had us worried after you didn't answer after 3 rings!" Sapnap said. "Sorry! I was enjoying the ringtone I gave you." Dream said. "It's Just did a bad thing!" Foolish yelled from his farms. "How did you know!? Don't tell Scar, but I couldn't sa no to Pvp and I gave him ice cream.." Sapnap said. Dream began to laugh at the confession. "You're in so much trouble, Sap... Once he finds out, it's hunting season, man... I pray for you." The blond snickers, going back to the surface to greet the others with Sap on the line still, on speaker. "Anyway, I just wanted to give you a check-in while you were gone... Yogurt's improving on his axe skills, Fundy is having Dream withdrawals, Patches snuggles up in your clothes to sleep, oh! And the kiddos are currently running the bakery with the help of Gem and H..." Sapnap said. "Oh dear... How man times have they made a mess with the flour?" Dream asked, falling into his old routine when he and the others would brainstorm about Manhunts at Mcc... The only places outside of the SMP where Nightmare was weak. "Welp! I better go then, huh?" Sap asked. "Uh, actually, no... I think some of the other hermits would like to know how the server is doing while they're off... Hang on..." Dream said, taking his comm off so the group of hermits could gather around and greet Sap.

The non-hermits watched and Dream waved them in, letting them hear in. "Oh! How is Decked out? Has Tommy broken it again!?" Tango yelled. "No, we've kinda closed the game down until you guys come back. Oh! Impulse, Marshal was wondering if you could help him understand wha a T-flip is... Mumbo tried, but he confused the poor baby..." Sapnap said. "Sure thing! Want me to explain it now since we're in a break?" Impulse sked, stealing Dream's communicator. "Hey! Pulsey! My comm!" Dream whimpered, running after Impulse while the elder ran off with it. "It's nice seeing Dream in a childish light... He's been through so much..." Foolish sighed. "I mean... This is a terrible place to be childish in..." Pearl said. "Either way... He needs to lose his tenseness..." Foolish said. "Foolish... Promise me one thing.. When the red sea hits, You run from him.I know you two had conversation... But when things get intense, relationships and past promises are nothing in the red haze. So get as far as you can and find a way to break through the border." Grian said. "Eh?" Foolish asked, looking at Grian, who was running after Dream and Impulse.

Foolish looked around at the group and felt a tad uneasy. "Why do I feel like I'm in danger?" Foolish asked himself. Sweetheart, You kinda are. I mean, Loser is writing this... You're in a burning building and the escapes are blocked off with fire. You're in trouble.

Chapter Text

Dream hummed as hopped about in his and Foolish's base, messing with how high he could go before the drop leafs decided that he was too heavy and drop him from whatever height to kill him. "Dream! Get down from there! You're gonna die!" Foolish yelled, watching his brother mess about more. "I know! That's the plan!" Dream cackled, watching his timer. 

16:19:38

If Dream did the math right, which is rare, that would make it so he'd be a yellow and that would mean he could legally be a menace to society. Then again, is that a good thing or bad thing? "Dude, you have like 20 minutes until you switch, why do you wanna die?" Foolish asked. "So I can legally steal from people? C'mon, Foolish, we lived with Tommyinnit for prime's sake, you cannot tell me committing the act of thievery isn't at least appealing by now." Dream huffed, hopping in place to make the drip leaf he was on drop faster. "No. Get down from there!" Foolish huffed.

The two bickered before the drip leaf got fed up with the back and forth and decided to say 'to hecc with your argument, argue off of me!' and dropped Dream... 60 blocks in the air... The blond could only yelp in surprise before he met the floor in a puff of smoke and popped up from his bed in excitement.

Dream fell from a high place

<Dream: Heck yeah!>

<Dream: WAR CRIMES>

<Smajor1995: dream no>

<Dream: dream ye>

15:10:07

"YEA! Whoo! C'mon, Foolish! Let's go commit some war crimes!" Dream yelled, grabbing his iron axe with sharpness, and his brother before he put on the gold protection chestplate he found while rifling through a dungeon underground. "You're gonna die first at this rate, dummy." Foolish sighed. "Good! The faster I die, the faster I can get back to my baby boy!" Dream reasoned while he and Foolish dug their way out of the gravel door they made to help 'blend' their home of operations. "You didn't have to accept if you knew you'd miss Yogurt..." Foolish sighed. "I couldn't say no to Grian! That's like... Making dinner for 3 and being the only person to eat it!" Dream huffed from personal experience. What? George and Sapnap's feud when they were kids was intense! 

There were days 15-year-old Dream would be by himself at the dinner table waiting for those two to leave their rooms for hours, and he'd give up and eat dinner for himself... Alone. He's still terrified of being on his own with Nightmare still in his head. "I take it that happened a lot with you?" Foolish asked. "Why would you know, family favorite?" Dream huffed, pouting as they made it to spawn. "Hey! The brothers made it! Hi!!!!" Bdubs yelled. "Oh my goodness! Are you ok, Dream!?" Cleo yelled, going to check up on Dream, who was now sporting a plethora amount of scrapes, scrathes, abrasions, and bruises by now. "I'm great! Best rush of adrenaline in my life so far!" Dream beamed. "Really!? Not even being chased down by 3 other people?" Scar asked. "Yeah... Sometimes it got repetitive just trapping those guys and killing them over and over again, and running away... Sometimes I rewatch the videos we made and let them circulate and harp on myself for the flaws I saw or see... You know, sometimes I wonder if it was even worth it..." Dream sighed, looking at his axe then at the mansion's half burnt infrastructure. "Anyone wanna bother the Bad boys?" Dream asked, making Scar raise his hand immediately. "Me!" Scar yelled. "Let's go!" Dream yelled, running with Scar in happy pandemonium.

"They're gonna die." Cleo sighed. "Oh absolutely... You know, he messed about with drip leaves so he could die." Foolish sighed. "You know, I wonder how those two haven't managed to make it to red yet." Bdubs sighed. The three watched as the two chaos gremlins climbed and scaled the burnt woodland mansion. "Grian!" Dream yelled, poking his head out from the layer of water that has stayed on the roof since the unfortunate burning of the mansion happened. "Erghnm..." Grian groaned. "Yeah, I know! Did you know, that if trap a creeper in a room with 4 cats, they actually give up and kamazie themselves!? I learned that last night and man, lemme tell you when you play the theme song to the prince of bel air, they explode right on the good notes!" Dream rambled, making Scar have an epiphany and begin to yap about star wars and disney.

Dear lord, how did Dream sit through all that while Bdubs got Hemroids? Like really!? How!? And don't say what I think you're gonna say. 

(NO! Say it! Loser is just embarrassed!)

The rest of the session went as normal, Grian was kidnapped like... 12 times? 9 of those times were attempted by the Clockers, 3 of the other times was Dream fireman carrying the man while he talked about random things to the unconscious man. 

~~~

Meanwhile back on Hermitcraft, The kids were excited to play a game called Stat poker... But minus the stats and betting. Ok, well, they had pretzel bits and extra large playing cards. Imagine a school of small fish sitting on a rock with regular sized playing cards, but when the fish hold them, it's almost 700 times bigger than the fishies. Yeah... That's going on. 

"I put down 4 more bits..." Beckerson said to Yogurt, while the fishie squinted at the fox. "Oh yeah? Well I stick to your 4 bits... And raise it by 5!" The fox huffed. "That- That's not how this works, Yogurt." Doc said, looking from his own cards to look at the child. "No wait, this is getting good, uncle Doccy..." Shroud said, eating his own chips from the entertainment. "Oh yeah!? Then I raise those 5 by 7!" Beckerson yelled. "Ok, no... We stopped at 5, show your cards you two." Doc sighed.

They both lost... Majorly... Then again... They had the wrong cards... How did they get big fish little fish cards? Sapnap was heard laughing from behind the snack bar when he saw this. "OH MY GODS! HOW DID-" Sapnap gasped, going to get the kids calmed down while Doc collected his pretzels. "Shroud, wha happened to your chips?" Sapnap asked the spiderling. "I ate them." Shroud said, blinking his 8 eyes at Sapnap. "Ah... Well, we'll need to get you some more and a new set of cards... Marshal don't eat those flowers, they're poisonous." Sapnap said, stopping the small cow boy from eating said flowers. "Why do you have these out, man!?" Marshal whined, hiding with Doc. "I know, You can yell at Scar when he gets back, Marshal." Doc said. 

Sapnap sighed as he watched the kids mess about with the other games they could play while they wait for their guardians to be done with their errands. Of course, those with guardians in the life games stayed with Sap of whoever their designated adult told them to stay with. Finnley and Foolish Jr. were told to stay with Cub, which the kids didn't mind. Both boys saw Cub as the uncle who over-feeds them. Pvp was forced to stay with Gem, which is a terrible idea, really. Stick a gremlin with another gremlin? Bad news. Purpled, despite being an almost adult, was told by Impulse to stay with Wels. (He's still a teen in this, bite me!) 

Yeah, Hermitcraft is more calm when Grian's gremlin nature is occupied with other stuff... But now we gotta worry about Pvp, Exdee, and HD... Those three are wildcards....

Chapter Text

The remaining hermits on Hermitcraft gathered at Smile Cafe and gathered around the grouped-up tables. "Ok guys, I just learned something devasting..." Gem began, putting her hands on the table in determination. "What is it, Gem?" False asked. "Most of the kiddos don't know how to make a last-minute hunting knife! From memory!" She huffed, making the hermits wince. "I think their guardians had their reasons!" Stress began, looking at Sapnap, Karl, Fundy, Ranboo and Tommy. "Shroud told me he didn't need one..." Tommy said. "I don't even know how to make one." Ranboo said. "I taught you last week, for the hundredth time..." Tubbo replied. "I have memory issues." Ranboo argued. "I forgot that was a thing." Sapnap said, looking away in shame. "Was I the only one here who didn't know you could do that?" Karl asked. "Ok, so we need a workshop day... I with the others were here too... But they have those life games to do and record to keep themselves from burnout, so we'll make do with who we have!" Xisuma said, clapping his hands and shifting in his seat for more comfort. "We should have a basic in survival workshop for now, and when everyone gets back, we can do a trade-specific one!" Tubbo suggesting, smiling at the positive responses. "That's a great idea Tubbo! But please refrain from showing the young ones how to create nukes as you first workshop. But it's a great second workshop topic!" X said. "You know, I'd love to know how one makes a nuke too..." Doc said. "Says the man who is 90% insane and 10% silent rage." Ren hummed. "At least you didn't get a sword lodged into your chest by your best friend..." Mumbo sniffled. 

"Ok, no more life series memories, you're scaring Sapnap." Karl said. "They've done more than scare me!" Sapnap said, grabbing his husband's hand. Karl rolled his eyes while the others discussed over who would be in what topic during the workshop they planned for later in the day. How did Tommy manage to talk his way into farming for resources? He doesn't redstone as well as the others did, but his words were: "You never said it had to be automated farming! Ha, loopholes!" And this is why they hold Tommy like he's a cat... He always manages to find ways to break things. "Ok, so for farms, we have Mumbo, Tommy, George, and Karl... Shelter making has Stress, Beef, xB, and Ranboo, for Combative skills, we have Gem, False, Purpled and Techno- Techno, are you sure you want to put the new body I made you to the test?" X began, looking at the Techno-esqe-looking body next to Phil. "Yes? I asked you to make me a body to host my ghost for a reason, Axolotl." Techno said. "It's still so weird seeing a guy looking like Techno... Didn't we-" Wilbur began, only to get punched by Niki. "Shut." She said. "Ok, next we have location evaluations with..." X began, listing off the remaining topics and members for said topic.

The farming workshop was easy to follow in the kids opinions. Tommy was making it as interesting as he could so Yogurt's ADHD didn't make him space out by making the kids actually plant some carrots and potatoes. Mumbo and George had the youngins laughing at their 'bickering' but it as really staged to help transition into automated farming. Karl was sweet enough to make Mumbo's segment enjoyable by putting on a narrator voice and explaining everything he saw in Karl terms. 

"And now we see the wild Mumbo Jumbo in his habitat of making an automated pumpkin farm... Where mashed pumpkin is a possibility." The brunette said, making Shroud snicker. "I remember he tried to make pumpkin pie and it was burnt." Shroud giggled. "Oh yeah! The pie massacre!" Beckerson gasped, laughing at Mumbo's flubbering protests. "Logically, if you double the temperature, the time is halved!" Mumbo said. "Said no one ever." George said, gathering his tools to teach the kids how to harvest the crops correctly. The end of their session was fun as well! George showed them how to apply bonemeal correctly and how to not over bonemeal the crops. "Now, when I say, You guys are going to pull the carrots out from the ground by their stalks... Ready?" George asked, watching the kids run to a carrot stalk and fight for the one closest to the composter. Why that one? "There's four near the composter, guys! Don't fight!" George said, looking at Shroud and Yogurt. Shroud was latched onto Yogurt's arm and huffing.

Karl, the god of children that he is, walked over and simply plucked Shroud off Yogurt's arm and plopped him next to the next carrot to the left of Yogurt. "Go, Gog-man!" Karl said, smiling when the colorblind brit yelled for them to pull their carrots from the ground. "Yes! I got the bigger one!" Foolish jr. yelled. "It's not a competition!" Finnley huffed while Michelle rolled her eyes is annoyance. "Typical boys, always comparing their- Mmph!" She was cut off by Micheal, shaking his head and pointing at Mumbo's horrified face. "She didn't say it, Uncle! She's still safe!" Micheal said. Ok, who taught Michelle those words!?

Shelter workshop was interesting, Stress made sure the kids knew the difference between good last minute shelter materials and bad ones, xB watched as Beckerson tried to make an aquarium for himself, Ranboo explained how he was just as clueless as the kids were and sat with them as they learned, and finally Beef showed them how to play TCG... Yogurt loves the game by the way. Combat was meh, things they knew already... Other than the fact that Gem is like a bright pink ninja on a dark night... You'll see her coming, you just won't be able to react fast enough from the pure shock. But all in all, Survival workshop day was fun! Dinnertime with the server meant that the kids could eat together, and that's when the shame bomb hit... 

"So... I hear one of you almost said something inappropriate..." Iskall sang, taking a bite of his cooked cod. "Ack! Noo!" Beckerson said. "Well... Micheal stopped it, so that should negate that!" Michelle yapped, dropping her spoonful of stew. "I still worry... You guys are what, 9? 10?" Iskall asked. "Over 200 days." Yogurt said. "Our age timers stop at 200 days." He tacked on. "I'm going to assume that most of you guys are 10 or 11 at most." Iskall said. Thanks Iskall! Loser had no clue what their physical ages were!

~~~

The lifers were not having a good time, the last green names left were Foolish, Scott, and Impulse. "OK, bro... They're after you. I can't stop them all, but you go and find Skizzleman. You let him take the 30 minutes, ok?" Dream said, dropping a diamond chestplate on Foolish. "What? What're you gonna do to distract them?" Foolish asked. "What I do best?? Chaos is my demon's middle name, All I need to do is let him go crazy. Now, off you go into the walls." Dream said, pushing Foolish away and smiling. "Ok... You give him back, Nightmare... If I come back and see you in control... I'm gonna be pissed." Foolish said, making Dream nod. "Now go... We may not be allies with the TIES, but please go to Skizz... He's the only one you don't know ok? Go to him, and beg for him to take the 30 minutes... He's dangerously low, go now." Dream said. Foolish sighed and left while Dream looked at the diamond axe in his hand. 

"Nightmare, you make sure you stay tame, you hear? Only until I go red... Then you get to go crazy, ok?" Dream said to his reflection in the axe's blade. "Okaay!" Nightmare sang. Meanwhile, Foolish slowly crawled through the cave getaway he and Dream dug on their first day here. While he crawled, he kept looking at his comm for any events... And right as he looked for the 3rd time, he saw it...

Bigbst4tz2 was slain by Dream

<Dream: I'm sorry>

<Dream: paniked>

<SmallishBeans: you mean panicked?>

<Dream: no>

<Dream: Panik>

<FoolishG: I leave for one second, and you kill someone>

<Dream: He was looking for you>

<Dream: Fite meh>

<ZombieCleo: oh god>

<ZombieCleo: where did all the yellows come from!?>

<Grian: misadventure>

<GoodtimeswithScar: look at the birb using big words>

<Grian: you do realize i can kill you with a spoon, right?>

"Skizzleman?" Foolish called, poking his head through the hole in the floor where he assumed the TIES were based. "Foolish? What're you doing here?" Impulse asked. "Dream said to find Skizzleman and let him kill me" Foolish said. "Ah... Hang on, lemme whisper to him." Impulse said. "Are you the boogeyman?" Foolish asked."I'm never the boogey, ever..." Impulse sighed. "Wait... No, you were! Last recording session! You dropped Pearl." Foolish said. "How did you know!?" Impulse asked in shock. Only Skizz and Tango truly knew or saw. "Eh... Demigod stuff... Anyway, Skizzle?" Foolish said. "He's on the way, in the nether... You sure you ok?" Impulse asked. "Not really? I miss my kids... Normally by now we'd be gathered in my bed with a pillowfort and reading stories about the sea." Foolish sighed. "Yeah..." Impulse said. "Yellow names, amiright?" the redstone nerd tried. "Yeah..." Foolish said. "Dippledop!" Skizz yelled, tackling Impulse in a hug. "Man! Those guys up top are crazy! They're looking for you! It's like a headhunt- Oh hi!!" Skizz rambled, going to Foolish to talk with him. 

"Hi... Dream said to find you." Foolish said. "Aw... That little bundle of chaos... He's a sweetheart. How can I help ya?" Skizz asked. "Kill me." Foolish said, channeling his inner Ranboo in these situations. "Heh?" Skizz asked. "Take the thirty minutes you deserve." Foolish said, serious in his statement. "Ah... Ok? Do you want to die quickly or swiftly?" Skizz asked, confused to why someone he doesn't know would let him take an hour from them so he could gain 30 minutes. "Make a statement!" Foolish beamed. Ok, now Skizz knew why Dream was a little wary of Foolish sometimes. That demigod is a wild child. "Uh... Ok? Dop... Do we have a bed?" Skizz asked. "I have an extra set of string, why?" Impulse asked. "He wants a statement death, I'm gonna blow him in the nether!" Skizz said, realizing his mistake. Impulse and Foolish began laughing and Impulse doubled over in laughter. 

"You- You can't just say that, Skizz! That's Scar's job to say sus things!" Impulse laughed. "I didn't mean in that way!" Skizz yelled. "It doesn't matter to the people who watch these!" Foolish giggled, gathering his breath from the onslaught of unexpectedness with Skizzleman. "Man, You hang out with Scar for 5 minutes and his Scar-isms rub off on ya." Skizz sighs. Impulse calmed down enough to get the 12 bits of string he had left and made the wool needed for the bed. "Here... Have fun... Blowing him." Impulse said, laughing out loud again. SKizz grumbled and snatched the wool and Foolish before Impulse harped at him more for his misspeech. 

FoolishG was killed by [Intentional Game Design]

<Dream: HAAAAHAHAHAHAAHA>

<Dream: HOWD U DIE TO THAT>

<FoolishG: Shut>

<Dream: PWAAHSHSSDFETIY>

<Dream: NO>

<Tango: And this here is why siblings can't be in a death game together.>

<BdoubleO100: WHAT>

<BdoubleO100: Me and Scar are doing fine>

<BdoubleO100: Right Scar>

<GoodtimeswithScar: I killed a fish with a fork>

<BdoubleO100: MOM SCAR KILLED LOO-LOO>

<ZombieCleo: Endme>

"So, can Yellows killeach other?" Scar asked Cleo. "No... Not really?" She said. "Ah... Ok." Scar said. "Welp! I'm gonna make some TNT minecarts!" He said... Little did everyone know, Scar would kill so many with one of those things... 

FoolishG blew up

Etho blew up

Grian blew up

GoodtimeswithScar blew up

<GoodtimeswithScar: NOoooooooooooo>

<Grian: SCAR>

<ImpulseSV: wow>

<ImpulseSV: get your snacks the lovebirds ae fighting>

<Dream: got a front seat view here>

GoodtimeswithScar was slain by Grian

<Skizzleman: aaaaaand the wife won that argument>

Chapter Text

The next three or so weeks are honestly a blur to everyone... A warden is let loose in the caves, so that's dangerous, everyone somehow died enough times to become red names, and Jimmy is still alive... HOW!? "Nightmare, Behave yourself." Cleo said, looking at Dream's grayscaled body with it's vibrant blood red eyes that had flecks of purple mixed in. The vessel turned its head to the zombie and scowled. 

"I am behaving... You don't see me jumping off this sky rail like a crazy person, do you?" Nightmare said. "I did that... Was the best rush of adrenaline ever." Scar said, propping his head on Dream's shoulder. "Hey, how did Foolish take you dying and becoming red?" Bdubs asked. "I chased him into the safe room and told him don't let me in." Dream said, kicking Nightmare from the driving seat for a bit. "Oh- Then how did he manage to fall to his death then?" Bdubs asked. "Probably tired to build a life sized statue... I dunno." Dream sighed, crossing his arms. "Hey, I hate to break this cousinly moment, but why are we just standing here, over the Mean Gills?" Bdubs asked. "Shush Mister Traitor! We'd be at home if you didn't let Dad blow us both up!" Scar huffed, hugging Dream's corpse-esqe body. "Ow... Scar, not too tight, you'll pop the temporary stitches keeping my organs from falling outta me." The corpse said. "You look great as a walking dead body, Man! Wait- Which one of ya am I talkin' to?" Bdubs asked. "Still Dream here..." Dream said. "Nice- Nice... So when is the demon coming out?" Bdubs asked. "If Scar squeezes me any tighter, Now." Dream warned. Scar let him go a little, but he still held the blond like he was his baby brother. 

The four sat there until Foolish somehow found them. "Dream! Why did you leave me!?" Foolish huffed, stomping over to sit by his brother. Dream picked up Foolish's arm and placed it in his mouth, it was a habit the two of them formed while they waited for the miserable 24 hours to be up. "Feel free to bite, man... I don't mind." Foolish said, looking at his brother holding his left arm in his mouth. Dream's muffled complaints about how Foolish's arm tasted terrible were entertaining the clockers. "Alright you two, get back... Scar, get yer' toys..." Cleo sighed, letting Scar squeal in excitement and place down powered rails and TNT minecart. After some traditional prayers Scar made up on the spot, he showed the minecart down with a holler. "Go kill people!" Scar said, watching in fascination and unhinged red name bloodlust as the small cart that packed a punch fell slowly. "Why does this remind of DreamSMP?" Foolish joked, yelping when Dream bit down hard enough to break the skin. 

If anything, the taste of blood made Dream and Nightmare switch places, that's nice... "Do not mention that hell hole to me while I try to wait patiently for something to happen." Nightmare barked, letting Foolish's arm go while Cleo yelled a language to him. "Geez, who shoved you out of your bed?" Foolish joked, ruffling the other's hair. "Hey!" Nightmare laughed, enjoying the casualness of this moment. "Uh oh... Seems like Scott's coming up here! Scatter!" Bdubs yelled, jumping off the skynet branch and into the water nearby. Scar laughed and followed after Bdubs, laughing the whole way. Foolish looked at Cleo and she shrugged, watching her boys splash and wrestle in the calm ocean. 

"Did you guys try to drop a bomb on my head!?" Scott huffed, covered in what looked like soot. "We didn't! Nightmare had my arm, see?" Foolish said, holding his brother's mouth open to show the bloody teeth he had and the bite mark that matched. "I didn't, but you know how kids are..." Cleo sighed. "One of those two got knocked in the head one too many times." Scott sighed. Nightmare snickered a little and began to bite at Foolish more. "Oi! Hey, bad chompers!" Foolish said, using a stick to bop the other on the head. "Eck!" Dream yelped, pouting when Nightmare switched with him. "Oh hi Scott!" Dream beamed. Despite being a literal dead body waltzing around, he's a happy puppy around his favorite people. "Hi Hatchling." Scott said, softening at the other. 

"Anyway, let's truce at the moment and see where everyone is, time-wise." Scott said. "50 minutes and 9 seconds!" Dream said. "DREAM! You need more time!" Scott yelled, looking at the oblivious blond. "Nooo... Don' wanna... You know! Maybe I should go out with a blaze of glory! Yeah! Hang on! Lemme go find Gri-man!" Dream said, hopping up from his spot and going to go find Grian... But Scott grabbed him by the scruff of his hoodie and made him march in spot. "Now hold on there, you bundle of chaotic dumbness... The Grian you know and the Grian here are two different people." Scott said. "I know... Like how Mcc G-boi is different from normal G-man..." Dream said, pouting at not being able to move. "So I'd advise not going to him and finding someone else." Scott says. "Fine! I'll go find Tango..." Dream said. 

Scott let Dream go and made sure he would aim for the water instead of the isle. "Okie! Bye!!" Dream said, hopping off and not looking below him. "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE LANDING!" Scott yelled, rushing over to make sure Dream didn't die... Because if he did, Scott would die of laughter. "How did we become the parental figures this time round?" Cleo asked Scott. "We had the unfortunate chances of being so close to Dream..." Scott sighed. "Did you see those adorable scales forming on his cheeks?" Cleo asked. "I did! He looked so adorable with those. Part of me can't wait to see his scales next Mcc..." Scott said. "Yeah... What's your time at?"Cleo asked. "Eh... 4 hours and 17 minutes?" Scott said. "an you lend me half an hour?" Cleo asked. "Why not? Hang on... Got a chest anywhere?" Scott asked, looking around.

~~~

Smajor1995 was slain by ZombieCleo

<Dream: Yeah!!!!!>

<Dream: Go Aunt Cleo!>

Tango was crushed by an anvil whilst escaping Dream

<Dream: >:) >

<FoolishG: Choas hatchling>

<Dream: *Evil laughter*>

<Grian: Idiots>

<Grian: Who killed their brain cells>

<Tango: Never knew that was a death message...>

Skizzleman was slain by Etho

<ImpulseSV: ETHO>

<Etho: YOU WERE AT THE SAME MEETING>

<Etho: SHUT>

Dream blew up

<Dream: XD>

<Dream: woops>

<FoolishG: DREAM>

FoolishG fell from a high place

<Dream: FOOLISH>

<Smajor1995: ah brotherhood>

<GoodtimeswithScar: joint stupidity>

SolidarityGaming fell from a high place

SOLIDARITYGAMING HAD BEEN ELIMINATED

Jimmy... you had one job... HOW!?

Chapter Text

00:34:08

Dream stared at his arm while he was holed up in the remains of the woodlands mansion. "Ugh, don't you even, you little-" Dream started, Ducking behind his shield while a spider attacked. "So happy Tommy's not here, he'd hug you..." Dream sighed, slicing the huge arachnid in half with his stolen borrowed sword he got from rummaging through Jimmy's things. The blond wandered around, keeping an eye on his clock and his comm. 

00:28:19

"Just need a kill... Just need to find someone..." Dream sighed, winching at Nightmare yelling at him to get into the fray. "You wanna take over? I'll gladly let you waste our last 20 minutes on stupidity." Dream growled. He slowly made his way out of the mansion, seeing an unsuspecting Bdubs. "We could be evil and kill him." Nightmare hummed. "Nah, He's on his last like few minutes, shut... Bdubs!" Dream called, making the other jump. "Dream! Don't scare me like that! I could've hit you and made my wolves hurt you!" Bdubs huffed. "Honestly, you'd end my suffering." Dream sighed before punching Bdubs and waiting for the wolves to tear him apart. 

Dream was slain by Wolf

DREAM HAS BEEN ELIMINATED

And there he levitated, blinking at the puff of smoke that was him. He turned to his left when he heard the familiar cackles of Tango, Skizz, Joel, and Jimmy. "Why did you hit him?" Joel laughed, holding his ghostly stomach. "Eh... I was at 28 minutes and figured: Go out dumb" Dream said. "Oh- Who's that glaring at you?" Jimmy asked. "The resident demon that haunts the hatchling." Tango said to his rancher, which the blonde made a confused noise. "His name is Nightmare... Say hi Nightmare!" Dream said, patting his watcher's back. "Why did you get us killed?" Nightmare growled. "Because you and I missed our baby boy!" Dream said. "Shit, you're right..." Nightmare said. "Say hi." Dream said. "Hi." The other said. 

"Drizzle-man... What was going on in your head?" Skizz asked. "It was either kill the pups or die..." Dream said. "I voted kill the pups." Nightmare said. "And that is why you did not have control then." Dream smiled. The ghosts proceeded to watch the massacre begin... "Oh look! There's Foolish!" Dream said, going to stalk his semi alive brother. The demigod was currently being hunted by Pearl. "Man, I never knew Auntie Pearlie could be so ruthless..." Dream said, Laying on his stomach and kicking his feet while Foolish he tried to keep his voice under control... It didn't work... She found him and lodged her sword through his chest. 

The group of ghosts hissed in pain at the sight and watched as Foolish's corpse fell to the side and the other's spirit joined them. "How'd she hear me!?" Foolish huffed. "Aussie ping..." Tango teased, reading the chat. 

FoolishG was slain by PearlescentMoon

FOOLISHG HAS BEEN ELIMINATED

"So, I've been meaning to ask, but how are you guys brothers?" Jimmy asked. "No one told him?" Foolish asked, jolting when another flash of lightning hit the ground nearby and Bdubs popped up near them. "Oh my- Of all the ways to go out... I fall to my death with a ladder!" Bdubs yelled. "At least you got your closure..." Dream said, patting his back while he watched everyone die one by one. 

Soon, the afterlife was full of most of the players. Only Martyn, Impulse and Scott remained. "Man... I never thought you'd have two ghosts, dragon boy." Etho laughed. "I know! Grian doesn't have an extra ghost, why do I?!" Dream huffed, looking at Grian. "Bros, I accepted my hecking demon!" Grian said. Skizz looked at Nightmare and smiled. "Who do you think will win?" Skizz asked the combat oriented ghost. "What do you mean?" Nightmare asked, holding back his personal thoughts. 

In all honesty, he wasn't sure which idiot would win. He knew Impulse's style of combat was clumsy yet calculated, but Scott and Martyn? He's clueless with their styles. "Who do you think will come out on top?" Skizz asked. "Well... I only know Impulse's combat... I'm sure he'll be fine..." Nightmare said, floating in front of Impulse's determined face. "I just hope he can keep up with two people instead one person at a time..." Nightmare said.

~~~

Not long after the game ended with Martyn winning, the group are given their bodies back and healed up. "So... Who wants coffee?" Skizz asked. "Meee!" Dream yelled, jumping and having his arms around like a young child at a baseball game where the players are asking who wants their pitching ball. "I know you want coffee... Who else wants to get coffee?" Skizz asked. "We'll all go, just to make sure Dream doesn't over-caffeinate himself again." Grian said. "That was one time and I had to finish my home!" Dream huffed. "You had a home done! You just didn't want to sleep and kept going." Grian said, flicking the blond on the forehead and sighing. Dream pouted and then huffed. 

It really was just one time! He wanted to try coffee for the first time and then got hooked for the day... Which led to him drinking almost 4 times his weight of coffee. When he got back to hermitcraft, he was what Tango called 'a creeper that's been electrificated one too many times'. Mans was vibrating everywhere and was bouncing off the walls whenever he moved. "I'll behave his time, promise..." Dream whimpered. "Don't fall for it, Grian! He's using those hatchling eyes on you!" Scott yelled, covering Grian's eyes. "SCOTT!" Grian laughed, attempting to pry the cyanette's hands off his eyes. 

It was times like these that make Grian happy for these death games. On one hand, he got to see how ruthless and cold hearted his normally 'bubbly' friends can be, and the other, he got to hang out with them and squeeze them into his busy hermit life. Although, thinking of twists were getting harder each time they did this. "Alright everyone, I think it's time we all go home and rest." Tango called, making an 'oomph' noise when Jimmy playfully collapsed on top of him. "But- I'm gonna miss my ranching man!" Jimmy sighed, plopping his head back and then forward again, knocking his forehead into Tango's with an audible 'blap' sound. 

"You're gonna see me again soon anyway." Tango said before he covered his mouth. "Tango! Shh." Impulse laughed, punching his friend's arm hard enough to make the other lose his balance briefly. "Dude! You almost killed me!" Tango yelled. "I did not! If I wanted to kill ya, I would've done it already!" Impulse says. "Oi! Life session is over! Everyone, congratulate Martyn on his first win!" Grian said, lapping for his friend. 

"This feels like a graduation party..." Foolish whispered to Dream. "Never had one, bro." Dream smiled. The group waved their goodbyes and left for their home servers, discussing how they couldn't wait for the next season of the Life games. "So~! How was you first ever Life season, you guys?" Pearl asked Foolish and Dream. "Honestly, I thought I'd lose control on Nightmare halfway into my yellow life." Dream said. "I thought he'd lose control the first time he died and would just stab me." Foolish said, making Dream gasp in offense. "How dare!? I would never stab the person who took my kidnapper's attention away from me!" Dream said. "The wording on the sentence is more disturbing than Bdubs and Scar calling me mom." Cleo said, blinking at them. 

Tango, Impulse, Etho, and Bdubs laughed at that, mostly due to Cleo being scarred for life after being the mother of both Scar and Bdubs at the same time. Etho got dragged into the dynamic, but he got the tailwind of all that chaos. Once they returned home, they were brought back to Spawn, where all of them got tackled into a hug by everyone. Then they were promptly interrogated by Tommy and Tubbo in a parody of the Men In Black. Yes, those two gremlin teens wore black suits and ties, black shades, and even made a whole interrogation room for the bit...

Chapter Text

The next hermit meeting was serious. The hermits were getting confused on which child was the oldest and what their ages are from eldest to youngest. Obviously, the hermits knew Pvp was the youngest, witnessing his hatching and all that... But who came first? "So, obviously, we have no idea when their birthdays are." Beef said. "Beckerson was born March 18th...No idea the year, since time is irrelevant here..." Karl said. "How do you know that?" Sapnap asked. "Remember when my memory was terrible and I'd disappear for who knows how long and would forget who you even were?" Karl asked. "Again, I will kill Exdee for that." Dream said. Karl shrugged and hummed a little lullaby to help soothe Slimenap from his timeout in his timeout bucket. "So, how did Slimenap get a timeout again?" Fundy asked.  "He told Sapnap about Dream and Foolish." Karl replied.

Oh- That's why Sapnap is glaring at Grian... "Sapnap, behave," George said, flicking the fire boy's temple while he went back to reading the redstone guide Mumbo got him. "Ow- Hey!" Sapnap huffed, making smoke puff from his nose. "It's ok, Sap... Anyway, back to the ages... Back on the SMP, I had it based on a day scale, but I could never get the scale over 200 days. So I left it, hoping the player taking care of the mob would keep track... Oh how wrong I was... Doofus over there started a war over killing pets!" Dream said. "Because Beckerson went missing!" Sapnap called, pouting. "How was I supposed to know you made him a child almost 4 hours prior to the war?" The ravenette sniffled. "Asking?" Tango suggested. Phil laughed at that statement and smacked the meeting table. "Oh DreamSMP? That's like taking a bath in lava without fire resistance." The eldest avian cackled. Grian sighed and looked at Dream. "So, how can we tell?" He asked. This was the most serious the hermits had seen Grian. Grian, the prankster, the pesky bird, the puppeteer of the wars and chaos... 

"Back of their necks should house an estimate to their ages now... I did some tweaking." Dream said. Karl pulled Slimenap out of his bucket and checked. "Well howdy-doo... It says he's 8..." The brunette said. "Seriously!?" Sapnap gasped, going to look at the slime's new age. "Man, I thought he was like 70." He said. "How could he be 70 if he can't even do 7 times 7?" Karl asked. "49!" Tango and Impulse answered. "Correct!" Zedaph said, clapping like a proud parent. "Anyway, we have to get back to the task at hand as well... The charity event... What're we doing?" X asked. "Last time we did minigames..." Tango said. "We always do minigames though... And last time we had a war!" Jevin huffed. "Which we missed, by the way." Tommy piped up with Tubbo nodding in agreement. "Trust me, you guys missed a good time." Scar said. "Was that a pun on your name?" Ranboo asked, tapping his fingers together. "Eh- Oh I didn't notice that..." Scar said, making Tubbo laugh. "Dad!" Tubbo gasped, holding onto Tommy while he laughed. 

The next half hour was full of spitballing event ideas and plans for the next season since they only had 3 weeks left on the server anyway. Something about multi-admin servers having a maximum lifetime of 2 years. "Quick question... Will Slimenap have to go back to his small cube form?" Sapnap asked. "Nope... He's stuck like that." Dream said. "Well then! Any ideas for season 10?" X asked, looking at everyone fully. "Nope! But I can confidently say I'm not basing with G-man next time." Scar huffed. "Grian... What did you do?" Pearl asked. "Nothing!" The birb huffed. "He stole Scar's heart, huh?" Cub guessed. "Nah, Then he'd want to stay with him... It must've been a life series thing..." False said. "He stabbed me in the back! Literally! How could you!?" Scar gasped dramatically. 

 "And you guys say Doc's a drama queen..." Bdubs joked. "What? No, that's Ren." Doc said, making the werewolf look at him in surprise. "Ex- squeeze me?" Ren gasped. "I am not a drama queen. I just wear my heart on my sleeve." Ren sniffled. I know Ren... Losing a cherished pet you considered your baby is painful. "I'd say Sap is a drama queen..." George offhandedly said. Sapnap puffed a small flame at George, making the brit sigh and wave his hand towards the flame, knowing it wasn't going to hit him or get close. Sapnap was the type to threaten you 17 times and then act on the 18th threat.

"So, now that we've established who is a drama queen! We have to break the news to the kids and have one last memory here on Season... Is this 9 or 8 and a half?" Dream said, hitting Fundy on his arm to wake him up. "We're technically on 9... But we've called it the continuation of 8." X said. "I've been calling it 9..." Doc said. "Welp! Season 10, or 9, here we come!" Stress smiled, cracking a popper and making confetti rain on the group. How did she make one that big?

Chapter Text

"Uncle Zoomy... Why can't we go to Dee's bakery today?" Shroud asked, shaking the cobwebs from his hair. "Well... Dream and a few others have a few surprises that you guys can't see." Xisuma said, escorting the kids past Smile Cafe. "But why? Are they really fun surprises!?" Michelle gasped, hopping while she walked with the group. "Maybe..." X said, shrugging while he took the group of 8 year old kids to his boat race track. "Dibs on Mikey!!" Finnely yelled, hopping on the piglin's back. "Ack! Finnley! I can't hold you when you hop on my back!" Micheal yelped, struggling to hold onto the godling. Finnely giggled and held onto Micheal while the rest of the group smiled at them. "Welp, we all lost... Beckies, wanna team up with me?" Michelle asked. "Sure!" Beckerson smiled, skipping to the taller girl. Yogurt and Shroud teamed up together, Slimenap got a bucket put on him and he instinctually went inside it, which Foolish Jr. held. So those two teamed up... Did that leave just X on his own? Dang man... "Alright you guys... Choose your boats..." The admin said, watching the kids play roshambo to find out what type of boat they'd get. 

"Oh c'mon! You always get Oak, Foolish!" Michelle groaned. "Then get better at Roshambo, 'Chelle..." Foolish Jr. sassed. Yogurt whistled in amusement and 'ooh'ed. "Someone's been hanging around Zooma Eret waaay too much..." Yogurt said to Shroud. "True... Anyway, want Acacia or Jungle?" Shroud asked. "Ooh... Orange wood... Or slightly tanned? Tough choice..." Yogurt said sarcastically. "I can smell the sarcasm from here, dude." Micheal laughed, prying the birch boat from Finnley's smaller hands. "Finn's let go." Beckerson said, sternly. The boy did as he was told, much to mini Foolish's dismay. "HE LISTENS TO YOU BUT NOT ME!?" The other yelled. "To be fair, Beckerson can be scary when he gets that tone... He's even scarier than my moms when a prank destroys their builds..."  Michelle said. "Oh yeah... Miss Pearl is scary..." Pvp said, making the group scream. "Peevs! What're you doing here!?" Yogurt yelled, rushing to the younger and double-checking him over. "I escaped papa and Aunt Pearlie... They can't get me if I keep moving... I gots ta go..." Pvp said, running off towards Sam Nook. "What a chaotic kiddo..." X sighed, making the kids get in their boats. "The course is simple, follow the red and white bumpers, and you'll be fine. Remember, no magic, no combat, and no traps!" X said, staring at Yogurt and shroud the whole time. "That was one time!" Shroud huffed.

Yogurt snorted and smirked. "But that's my whole reason I do these..." Yogurt said. "Dude, you literally strapped a rocket to your boat last time!" Beckerson yelled. "But did I win?" Yogurt asked. The whole group yelled in unison: "YES!" X chuckled at the group's argument and began to count down from 5. "Ready?" X said when he got to 3. "Set?" The admin continued, watching the kids scramble to get their oars in their hands. Before he could say go, the 4 boats were off. "Just like their parents... Impatient rule breakers..." X sighed, flying over the course to make sure the kids weren't cheating. They obviously were, but that's the hermitcraft charm with these kids. Finnley was melting the ice, Michelle was using said melted ice to spray Yogurt and Shroud, Shroud was shooting webs at the others, and Slimenap was busy eating bits and bobs of the course as he passed by the things he assumed tasted good. 

"Micheal! Tell your munchkin to stop melting the course!" Beckerson huffed. "What!? No! Keep melting!" Michelle yelled. Yogurt was having the time of his life, he was playing Mario Kart minus the Mario. The fox was spinning their boat in the melted ice, which somehow gave them more speed, and a better angle for Shroud to shoot webs at the others... Hang on! No... Shroud is a literal Gatling gun! Yo! Innovation for the youngins!

X shook his head at this and stood at the finish line on the other side of the mountain the course went around. "Shishwammy!" Keralis called, landing on X's back and hugging the armor-clad admin tightly. "Hiya Keralis... What's up, mate?" X asked the big eyed man. "Was wondering where you were." Keralis said, smiling when the kids slid up to them in their boats and got out to also hug Keralis. "Keralis!!!" Beckerson yelled, hopping up to high five the man after he got off X to greet the children. The group never did see Keralis as just an uncle... They sort of saw him as living proof that Santa was real.

The man was more magical than the gods that live amongst them. Seriously! Who else could stare down an enderman in the eyes and make the enderman back down? Not Exdee or HD! So yeah... There was something magical about this big-eyed man before the kiddos. "So, Granpa K... What's the surprises uncle Dee is planning?" Shroud asked, hugging the man's leg. "Ah... Those? Well... I can't tell you guys that! Keralis gasped, holding his chest lightly. "How could I spoil such a gift your uncle and many hermits worked so hard on for you guys?" He sniffled lightly, making the kids jump into a panic to reassure him he didn't need to tell. "Ah, Don't mind him, guys, he's a little dramatic." X sighed. Keralis sighed and stared at X in bored amusement. "Wow... I give you love, and my loyalty... And I get bullied in return! Eh! The humanity!" Keralis yells dramatically and spins to fall into X's arms... The other let him fall flat on his back. 

"You are so dramatic..." X sighed, ignoring the kids' laughs and giggles. "Ooh! Uncle Soomy! Mama mentioned something called S'mores to Papa at dinner last night... What're those?" Yogurt asked X. "Special treats only the most behaved children get." X said, making the kids gasp and begin to yap about how well behaved they were. "Mhm... Alright you lot... Go pick up your boats so we can put them back." X said, watching the little ones nod and rush to break their boats down and place them back into the barrels they got them from. Well.. Everyone except Slimenap. He was still stuck in his bucket of shame. "Slime... Why're you in the bucket of shame?" Keralis asked. "Poolish no want me to eat the boat." Slimenap gurgled, sinking into his bucket more. "Oh you poor goopy darling... You can't help that... Jevin still has issues with holding his tools without making the handles disappear inside his hands... It takes time, dear.." Keralis said, bouncing the bucket lightly.

The rest of the day Keralis and X made sure to redirect the kids away from places where the hermits were setting up for their last hermit day on this world. "Ooh! Are those our cards with Mr. Beefie's card game?" Michelle asked, looking at Keralis's newest set of TCG cards. Beef called this pack 'The Next Era' edition, which Keralis bought the second Beef announced they were being sold at the TCG building. Keralis nodded and showed the kids each of their cards. Beckerson's was water themed, with the boy being in a relaxed swimming pose with a tropical fish booping his face. "Aww! I look adorable!" Beckerson squealed, holding his card.

Yogurt's had him in his natural habitat, which was asleep on a desk with a random array of redstone bits and bobs with a blanket on his back. "Woah! You look like an exhausted college student!" Finnley laughed, making the young fox flick him on the forehead. "At least I don't look like a child who is pestering his dad." Yogurt shot back. "Wow... Way to stab him in his heart, Yogs..." Michelle sighed, going to hold Finnley, who was holding back the tears. "Meanie-boo!" Finnley yelled, hugging Michelle and sobbing into her chest. "Great! Now he's gonna cry a whole ocean! Does anyone have chocolate or something sweet?" Michelle asked, holding Finnley as he cried in his cousin's chest.

It took 3 hours and Keralis needing to abandon X for Finnley to forgive Yogurt for his remark... After he made the fox do a silly dance. "Yogurt... Why were you so mean to Finnley?" Beckerson asked the snow-haired boy. "I'm upset." He said. "Why?" Beckerson pressed. "I overheard Gem and Cleo... We're leaving this place..." Yogurt said. "Duh. We're hermits... We move from place to place... We of all people should know this with how often our players spoke about moving to a different base to escape the Tyrant." Beckerson replied. "My mom's not a tyrant..." Yogurt argued. "Which is why I didn't say his name. I said the name of the entity controlling him... I know you want to stay... But have you ever thought that staying here hinders our growth? We all know we're much older than 8 years old... Mentally at least." Beckerson said. "Because we read dictionaries for fun." Shroud piped up, sitting on the grass next to the bickering cousins. "Besides, with the move, we'll be given more room to grow more! We all know we can't grow taller right now with how crammed the place is..." Shroud said.

"You boys alright?" X asked the three, shaking Foolish Jr. free of sand. "We're ok... How is Finnley?" Shroud asked. "He's better now. Still mad that his TCG card is literally him being held like a sack of potatoes by Foolish Jr. He was hoping he'd get his own card, but he got a joint card instead." X sighed, looking at the pouting totem. "X? X! Mr. Suma! We're ready!" Pearl called, making the admin smile and brush the sand off himself and gather the kids. "C'mon guys! It's almost sunset, which means your surprises are ready!" X called, making the kids rush to gather by him and walk to the spot they had Sapnap's birthday party at. 

When they stepped past the overgrowth the hermits had manicured for this moment, the kids were surprised to hos the place was transformed from the bright, sunny place to a dark campsite, filled with themed tents and play areas. "Surprise!" The adults yelled, making the kids smile and run to hug their adults before turning to X. "You were distracting us!?" Micheal laughed, smiling when Scar gave him a noogie, making his messy pink hair messier. "I did my best guys... But you lot... You guys are mean." X laughed, stretching his back and wincing at the audible cracks and pops. "Ha! You're gettin' old!" Tommy yelled, learning a smack to the head from Kristen. "Behave, Theseus." She said. "Oooh... The step-mom is mad at you..." Iskall teased, earning a glare from Tommy. "She's not even my step mom..." Tommy sighed. "Technically, Wilbur's my only biological son... I just kept Techno and Tommy since Kristen directed them to me." Phil said. "Which I proudly accepted into my family... Because I'm a good uncle and demanded they spend more time with me!" Grian huffed, puffing his wings in irritation. "And you wondered why I said no. They'd be chaos making troublemakers if I did!" Phil argued. 

"Ah yes... I forget you two are brothers... Is it by blood?" Zedaph asked, notebook open and pencil in his ear. "Where'd you get those from, man?" Tango asked patting the blondie down to make sure he didn't just materialize the darn things out of nowhere. "I took them from Pearl's chests... She'll be fine missing 1 set." Zedaph said. This led to Zedaph going full journalist mode and asking extremely uncomfortable questions to Grian and Phil. Kristen was later dragged into the conversation after Phil's mind short-circuited after Zed asked about how he was able to marry goddess. "That's quite an easy feat to accomplish, really! All you need to do is perform a ritual of your choice, and the god who is associated with said ritual either accepts your gifts or rejects them. If they accept, you gain the mark of the god! Mine was black feathers... So Phil's once colorful wings became black!" Kristen said. "I seriously thought I was performing a wellness ritual," Phil said. "Yes, because offering 'your undying loyalty  to the sweet nectar she secretes and breathes into this world riddled with corruption' was a wellness ritual." Grian teased. Tango and Impulse cringed at how the wording of that whole claim made their skins crawl. 

"If anything, it startled me and made me even more confused as to why he chose to perform a marriage proposal while over a sickly child..." Kristen chuckled, messing with her black knit sweater's sleeves as Ranboo politely readjusted her hat's feathers. "So was I! Even though I was that dying kid!" Grian yelled, looking at his sister-in-law with such exasperation it made the goddess shake her head affectionately and shove her brother-in-law playfully. "Ah... So, G... What's it like being in-laws with a goddess?" Zedaph asked. "Like having a sister I never did have... Pearl's a great last minute sister, but Kristen is the best person to run to when you unleashed like 27 withers out of spite and you don't have the courage to fight all 27." Grian said. "Can confirm. If I had a dime each time he's run to me for those situations, I'd have 60 cents... Odd that it's happened 6 times..." Kristen hummed.

The rest of the night was spent with the kids running around and playing TCG while Ren and Doc cooked some meat, seafood, and vegetables for the group on a makeshift barbeque. "How are you guys doing?" Karl asked the two men. "Great, my Dude!" Ren said, smiling brightly/ Doc nodded in agreement and flipped the fish he had on the grill. "Awesome... D!" Karl called to Dream, who was also playing a TCG game against Fundy. "Yeah?" Dream replied, not moving his gaze while Fundy planned his next move. "Did you and X get the campfires?" Karl asked. "Uh, yeah... Go to the grey tent that's zipped up and when we finish Dinner, we can set them up together." Dream said. "Okay, cool! See you then?" Karl said. "Mhm! Go find your husband, Karl... He's missed you... And give Q a chance... Please?" Dream said. "F- FI- Do I have to?" Karl asked. "Yes. Go and repair your relationship with that ducky... He's been though enough torture." Dream said. "Only if Ponk goes and forgives Sam." Karl said. "Aight, bet. PONK! MAKE UP WITH YOUR EX!" Dream yelled, making the mask wearing medical person turn to look at Dream in annoyance. 

"Do I look desperate?!" Ponk yelled. "Nope, Sam is!" Dream yelled, snickering behind his card while Sam protested. Despite the poor first impression, the hermits warmed up to Sam and Quackity... Somewhat. They like Sam more than Q for now... Mostly because Sam is easier to prank and is redstone friendly, Perfect distraction for Grian when the chaos gremlin energy is acting up. 

"Dinner's done! Grab your plates and cups!" Ren called, smiling when the adults made the younger hermits and kids go first. "Ren... Do you have any dry kelp too?" Beckerson asked. "Always little dude." Ren said, placing a huge sheet of dried kelp on Beckerson's plate before giving him a scoop of fish hybrid friendly foods. He may have had to ask Jimmy for help, since he knew the blond was a cod for one season of Empires. "Ooh! Thanks Uncle Ren!" Beckerson yelled, picking a piece of shrimp out of the scoop and biting the head off. Something odd about Beckerson, he loved shrimp heads... To him, it was like eating a popsicle on a hot summer day. 

Shroud was next, getting a huge helping of barbequed meat and insects. The spiderling smiled and thanked the two before he skipped off to sit by Beckerson and share some insects for some of the fishboy's shellfish. Micheal was next and he was the vegetable diet slew Ren made and marinated in smoked sauced hours before cooking it. Michelle had the same but begged Doc to add a tiny bit of meat into it... He added a tiny sliver of chicken into it and told the girl to savor her food while searching for that sacred chicken bit. Slimenap was given Diorite and commonly mined materials everyone had extras of. The slime refused to eat player food, much like Purpled. Finnley and Foolish Jr. got barbequed chicken wings and extra spice veggies. Finnley wanted the extra spice veggies to counteract how sweet Doc made his sauce. Foolish jr. only had the wings. Yogurt was the last one, getting a grilled chicken breast and some sweet berry sauce he could drizzle on top. 

(Bro, I wanna BBQ so badly now! XD)

Next were the teens, where Tubbo got steak, Ranboo got fish, Tommy got chicken much to everyone's dismay, Eryn got roasted pork with Netherwart and warped mushroom crumble on top, and Purpled was given a mountain special, aka the 'I have too much coal and iron ore than I need, please take it' meal deal. After the teens sat with the kids and helped them eat or cut their food up, the adults got their servings. Dream made sure Patches was given as much fish as she could stuff into her humanoid mouth. It was odd how Patches preferred to be an axolotl more than her 6 year old human self. After the whole server was gathered around the huge picnic table, eating their dinners and stealing from each other, the main admin clear his throat and took off his helmet. 

"I just wanna say that I'm so proud of how far the DreamSMP members have come... I still remember visiting Boatem and seeing Tommy and Dream wrestling over who would get the last bit of paper..." X laughed, making the boatem members laugh alongside him. "Or when Tubbo tackled a ravager without armor on and Scar freaked out when the boy went flying." Impulse giggled. "Or that time Purpled jumpscared you by falling on your chest while you slept." Pearl said. "That was an adorable day... I've never seen that boy so content until he'd fall onto Impulse and trap him like a cat." Scar said. "It's illegal to move a cat when they're comfy, the same applies to Purp, except he'd actually kill you." Impulse huffed. "Or when Bdubs would get dragged away from his projects so Sapnap could hear more about season 7." Cub sighed. "You were there when he did that?!" Bdubs gawked.

"I was the one who got you, Bdubs..." Cub said. "Still can't believe you guys resolved a war with minigames." Sapnap sighed. "I died in a few!" Grian said, glaring at Doc, Scar, Etho, and Ren. "You died in X's game! Why is he exempt of the glare!?" Etho huffed. "He made lethal dodgeball..." Grian smiled. "I love you guys..." Punz said, making the table look at him. "Besides Purps... You guys are the family I never had." Punz said. The hermits smiled and cooed at the sweetness. "I'm going to cry if we keep this up..." Cleo said. 

"No offense, but no one wants to see ZombieCleo cry... Her tears are like bloody and they're slimy and gooey... They make an amazing last minute adhesive though!" Joe said. "And that ruined my berry juice..." Shroud said, pushing the cup of sweet berry juice away from himself. They finished eating not long after and Karl and Sapnap gathered the campfires and placed them down. "Sap, could you start these up for me?" Karl asked as he fumbled with his flint and steel. "Sure." Sapnap hummed, kissing Karl's hair and starting all of the campfires up. Bad, Hannah, Niki and Jack got Marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate while Ant and Skeppy got the skewers for the marshmallows from a cooler near Ren. 

The rest of the night, the hermits cleaned up their eating area, but left it as it was, since they were going to open this server to the public once they left and began to instruct the children and teens how to make s'mores. Ranboo burnt his marshmallow on accident, which Tubbo ate so he could try again. Tubbo was the kind of platonic spouse who would take the other's mistakes and either laugh at their stupidity or give them another chance. After they were done with their marshmallows, False and Gem showed them how to assemble a s'more. It was sweet, according to Kristen. 

After the kids were tuckered out and Ranboo was dangling off Mumbo's shoulders, the hermits began going home... Man, it's gonna be weird leaving this place...

Chapter Text

The server gathered at spawn again and smiled at each other. "Well! It's that time, guys!" X called. "Whoo! The season's done!" Ren called out, jumping in excitement. "Now it can take these terrible shoes off and trade them in for new ones!" Ren continued. "It's going to be so weird living in a new place without my spoons..." Grian sighed. "Do you mean Mumbo and Scar or your actual spoon collection?" Pearl asked. "Yes." Grian said. Impulse shook his head and laughed. "So, Season 10! You kids ready to experience your first ever Hermitcraft server hop?" Impulse asked the group of kiddos.

Pvp nodded his head in excitement and beamed happily. "Uh-huh! Pop-pop and Poppsie promised to teach me how to swindle!" Pvp yelled, making Grian and Scar scramble to explain what they meant. "Guys... One kid... Can't we have one child who isn't a chaos gremlin?" Dream sighed. The rest of the server hung around the shopping district to let the others drop off their gear since they couldn't bring it along with them. "Ok! Everyone here?" X called. "Yep!" Everyone yelled. "Wait! Uncle Techie and Cousin Eryn aren't coming!" Michelle gasped. "You didn't tell them earlier!?" Shroud yelled. "I forgot..." She sniffled. "It's ok, we'll be okay without them, right?" Micheal asked, looking at Dream and X for answers. "Hang on... Let me ask them." X said, waving at the two that had coincidentally joined the group just now.

"Oh- Well, I kind of can't stay here anyway.. You know, dead people stuff..." Techno said. "I keep forgetting your body just stopped..." Dream said. "So do I." Techno hummed. "So, You're leaving us?!" The kids sniffled. "No! Your Grandma Kristen can always call me!" Techno began, panicking at the 12 or so watery pairs of eyes that were pointed in his direction. "He's dying for good!" Michelle yelled, running to hug the warrior's leg one last time. The other kids followed her, Pvp was a little clumsy, but he made it to the dude's legs. 

Eryn simply told the group that he felt like he didn't get to experience enough of the SMP fully, so he planned on doing a solo adventure in hardcore. This caused Scar to start laughing. "I remember when I tried hardcore... I crashed Grian's attempt and stole from him." Scar said, beaming at the memories of Grian's unscripted squabbles with him and Joel. "No! I hated those 100 hours!" Grian yelled. "How could you hate 100 hours of being with a friend and your boyfriend?" Fundy asked, fixing Yogurt's collar. "At the time, we weren't anything. More like fan-perceived soulmates who were like  gasoline and fire." Grian said. 

"Mhm.. And?" Cleo teased. "And whenever we were around each other things go wrong." Grian sighed. Scar hugged the sweater-clad mousie brown, blondie- What even is his hair color? Is it brown? Is it blond? Is it not even that color!? Is his hair like Tubbo's and up to interpretation!? "All I know is that I'm shockingly great at saving myself." Scar said. "But you-" Impulse started before his mouth was covered by Tango's hand. "Shhh... Let him marinate in confidence." Tango said. Wow, Tango! Leave the Scar man alone!

"Wait! Do I leave Pudding here!?" Finnley yelled, looking at his handmade squid doll. "No, You can keep him with you." Xisuma smiled, making the little god smile and hug the plush close. Honestly, the reason the boy was attached to the dolly was because it was Foolish's attempt to make him his first toy after they got back from the life games. Sure, the arms were off balance, and the head was much smaller than the arms.. But the little one loved the gift! It was his first ever present from his papa that the god made from hand and not with the help of magic or helpers. 

Sure, Dream had Scott and Jimmy help Foolish during the breaks of the game, but those two mostly stood back and said 'remember, your fingers are not aiming practice, and you're doing great sweetie!' Foolish sort of felt like a toddler at a T-ball gae with their parents cheering them on from the sidelines. Back to the group about to leave, most of the hermits smiled, but some had solemn faces. 

"Cheer up everyone, yes, we lost some members during this season, but they're in a better place." X said. "Speak for yourself... I sort of forgot that I had emotions to worry about." Techno said. "Have some blue..." Ghostbur said, reaching into his abdomen and yanking out ectoplasm from himself. The adults all covered the kids' eyes while the kids protested. They were used to their resident ghost doing disturbing things to cheer them up! One time, Ghostbur saw Slimenap sad, so he pulled out the ghost equivalent to his heart and let the slime play with it!

Slimenap never told anyone about it though... Good job, mate! "Thanks?" Techno questioned, holding the blob of rapid color changing goop. ""Wow, You've gotta have depression to fill that stuff up so quickly." Tubbo said, watching the sky blue goop start to become violet blue. "Geez, each... You sure you want to leave the server?" Dream asked him. "Yep." He said. The group went through the hub portal and let the departure group leave before starting the walk to the next season. 

"So, Season 10! What's everyone's plans?" Cleo said. "Impulse, go first!" Gem yelled "What!? Why me?" Impulse whined. "Because you kept telling me of all the cool ideas you got!" Gem squealed. She was so excited to have Impulse spill the chili. I know, you're thinking 'Shouldn't that be spill the beans?' but this is Hermitcraft.. Sayings be darned. "All I was thinking about doing this time was a sky-based engineer sort of thing." Impulse shyly said. "Ooh! You mean like Steampunk?" Tommy asked. "Sort of? You guys remember Bioshock?" Impulse asked. "Ah yes, the morality judged..." Cub smiled. "I'm going for the Infinite vibes." Impulse said. "You mean you're going to have your own daughter drown you!?" Tubbo gasped. "Spoilers, Tubbo!" Ranboo groaned. "Dude, that game's like super old..." Tubbo sighed. Ok, it's only 10 as of now, but it's not that old! Right? 

Ok, it's a toddler, but that was a good game, guys! "I miss Techno..." Grian said with a sigh. "Oh gods, it's the 'I miss Mumbo' chant all over again!" Quick, grab your children and run!" Keralis joked, making the kiddos giggle at the goofiness of their Granpa. "Say, X... Have you seen the new server?" Sap asked. "Dream said you and him scouted this place out." The ravenette said, picking up Patches after she fell on her face... She tripped on her tail and Dream was too far away to grab her in time! The little girl huffed and squeaked other protests of being a big girl, but Sapnap rolled his eyes at her fondly and carried her. "Hm? Oh, yes! You'll love the spawn area, Sap... But I can't spoil anything else for you guys..." X said, stopping in front of an unclaimed server entrance. "Tada! Here we are! Season 10! Are you guys ready?" X asked, smiling under his helmet when the kids cheered and screamed excitedly. Ok, Finnley screamed, and everyone else nodded... But the little one is super excited!!

"Here we go! Everyone line up and on go, we'll all go through the portal." X said, ushering everyone to get as close to the entrance but has yet to go through. "And..." X began before Dream snickered and screamed 'GO!' which prompted everyone to go through. "Wow..." X sighed, looking at Dream before walking in with the blond following him with a laugh. 

Dropping into season 10's spawn was filled with laughter, gasps, and plans of what to do next. X and Dream smiled at the scene of their server mates rushing around to see where they spawned and what was nearby. "Thank you." Dream said, watching his son and husband chase after a chicken. "Huh? What for?" X asked. "For accepting us into your family... Despite the trauma, bad first impressions and the tensions between each of us..." Dream said, flinching at the hand that was placed on his shoulder. 

"We Hermits made an oath... We promised to our original admin that we'd accept and love whoever stumbled upon our current server. And we promised that no matter what, we'd help them in any way we can... You guys needed a family... And we were happy to be hat family you all needed." X said to the blond. Dream smiled and hugged the helmet wearing player tightly. Odd... Why is Dream so... Touchy-Feely? Then it dawned on X.

"I need to have a talk with Grian, now."

Chapter Text

Dream followed X around the whole first day, beaming with literal flowers. "Dream, can you go and find some sheep and bring them to spawn?" X said, hoping that the blond would agree and run off. But the dragon pouted instead and started to whine and whimper about X abandoning him as his kidnapper and mother did. "Ah, jeez... No, I just need you to help Joe and I know he's too busy to look for sheep, and you can use your wings to quicken the pace!" X explained, panicking when the blond's eyes began to water up. 

Ok, Grian... How did you break this poor bean!? It ended with X having to hold Dream's hand while they went to find Grian and have the mousie-brown blondie explain what happened. "Oh! Did you know that I can cross my eyes!? Look!" Dream yells, doing so, while X watched like an exhausted parent whose child is making them watch them go up and down a slide. "That's amazing, Dreamboat... But I need you to go help Joe with Spawn... Please?" X bargained. Dream pouts some more, going as far to make his wings droop. "Now don't you use the baby dragon eyes on me, mister." X said. Prime, he is becoming a father the longer he spends time with these guys. 

"But... What if you don't come back?" Dream sniffles. "Now you know we hermits will always come back to you. You and anyone who needs us." X said, patting the taller's hair. "It's gonna be so weird when he gets taller." The two heard from the trees, making Dream go to protect X. "Hi Cub! Hey, have you seen where Grian ran off to?" X asked the lab coat wearing man. "Head northeast about 300 blocks then go straight east for the next 500..." Cub said. "Oh jeez... Can you babysit Dream for me?" X asked, making Dream squawk in offense. "Sure! C'mon Dragon Scales! We've got some caving to do!" Cub said, hopping down from his tree to drag Dream away.

This left X to go find Grian, just where Cub said he'd be. Stuck in a box with Skeletons surrounding his box. "Oh Dear..." X gasped, hopping down and killing the skeletons and getting Grian out of the box. "Thanks..." Grian sniffles out. "So Dream is broken again.. He's very emotional and clingy.... What happened in the life games, Grian?" X asked. "Lets see... Well the others said that he and Nightmare had two separate ghosts... Though, they've never told me or Pearl that we had separate ghosts, since we're watchers too... Well... Sorta. Pearlie's not a full watcher like me, she's only sensitive to their power, while I get the full hit of the trauma... So... Maybe that's it? Upon their series death the two split from each other?" Grian theorized. "Either way, Dream's broken and he's stuck thinking everyone is going to abandon him if we turn our back for a second." X said. "That's not good... Let me have a looksie, ok?" Grian said, wiggling out from his red sweater/jumper to skip in the direction X came from. 

"Wha- Come back and get your jumper, you gremlin!" X yelled, chasing after the chaos gremlin. The two made it to Cub teaching Dream how to make a creeper not hostile. "Remember, Creepers aren't naturally hostile They're pack creatures. The ones we encounter down in caves have lost their packs, and will do anything to reunite with them... These creepers are in a pack, see the little ones?" Cub said to the crouching blond, who nodded. "Don't scare the pups, or the adults will charge at you. Think of them as..." Cub trailed off, looking for an example. "Bdubs' horse stalls and the Jacob-Halos when Beckerson or Slimenap is mentioned." Dream finished, making Cub nod. "Yup. Oh, Hey Grian. Shhh, we're filming a nature documentary." Cub said, making the smaller crouch by them. "Hey, Dream... How ya feelin'?" Grian asked. 

"LikeI'vebeenabandonedalloveragainandI'mjustwatchingmyadoptedmothersailoffonadamnboatwithashoutof'I'msorryDream,Iloveyou!'andthenshe'scominghomewithsomeotherkidandsayingthatthey'llbethejoyofherlife..." Dream rattled off. He started at he 3 pairs of eyes of the 3 hermits surrounding him before Cub said: "Was it me, or was that a lot to process just now?" 

No, Cubby, my friend... You just got trauma dumped with a creeper pup sniffling at the sad vibes. Speaking of! "Oh, hello there, little one... Hi..." Grian cooed, patting the baby's large head. Go back to your mum. Thank you." Grian smiled, watching the littleone bounce back to its mom and face plant in the dirt. "Just like a creeper toddler..." Grian hummed before he placed a hand on Dream's forehead and retracted it like the boy had burned him. "What happened?" X asked. "Dream, where's Nightmare?" Grian asked. Dream shrugged and smiled. "He's oddly quiet...Maybe he's sleeping!" Dream beamed. Oh you sweet bean... That guy's not coming back... "Right... Um... X, could you look through Dream's code sometime later? Maybe when we've all settled down and have our starter houses built." Griansaid, which the admin nodded to. "Now, Dream... You need to go back to your family... I'm sure Yogurt and Fundy miss your presence." Grian said, making the dragon gasp and fly off in a hurry. The three waited for him to be far out of earshot before Grian dropped the bad news. 

"So Nightmare is Dead... Like not coming back, bros..."

Chapter Text

"Hold up... Like what do you mean dead?" Cub asked. "You know how really old people die? You know? In their sleep? Nightmare died in Dream's sleep. Like either Dream had a nightmare and died in that nightmare, making Night... Mare... Die. Wow say that 3 times fast." Grian said. "Thatthatthat." Cub said, making X snort. "It was a rhetorical suggestion, Cub!" X giggled while Grian shook his head. "Why did you go young again?" Grian sighed. "I dunno... Anyway... So Nightmare is like gone to the wind, right?" Cub asked. "Yeah... Look, Dream's gonna figure out and when he does, I don't know how he'll react to some part of him being dead." Grian said. 

"Probably sad." X said. "You know, when my helsmit died, I was overjoyed." Tango hummed as he sat by them, making the two brits jump. Cub smiled and handed Tango some bread. "Oooh! Bread! Thanks Cubby-master!" Tango said, hugging Cub. "Don't let Timmy know about this...He'll go feral." Grian sighed. "Oh! How is my rancher?" Tango asked through a mouthful of bread. "Finish your bread bit then ask again, Tongo." Grian joked. Tango swallowed the bit of bread he had in his mouth and huffed. "How. Is. My. Pretty. Rancher. Jimmy?" Tango said. "My baby brother is doing swell actually!" Grian smiled. "You have another brother!?" Cub gawked, holding onto the Creeper pup who had decided to join their conversation. The little hissed in excitement, while its mother hissed for him to come back. "I'll be right back!" Cubsaid, setting the baby down and ushering the poor thing back to its momma. "You know, that reminds me... X, I've been meaning to ask you if we could have a bunch of hermits group up and visit my baby brother's server." Grian said. "You can ask, but make sure to get his input as well..." X said. "Mkay." Grian beamed. "Oh void... X, he's going to pester Jimmy until he agrees to ask his other servermates." Tango sighed. "Willnot!" Grian squawked out. 

The birb went on his comm and began to ask Jimmy in the most polite way he could.

~~~Welcome to the Minecraft family (and friends) groupchat~~~

<Grian: Tim>

<Grian: Timmy>

<Grian: Timmy Solidarity Mincraft>

<Grian: JAMES SOLIDARITY MINECRAFT>

<SolidarityGaming: i hate my name>

<Smajor1995: lmao>

<Smajor1995: imagine hating your name>

<Grian: imagine gaslighting a heartbroken soul bound couple>

<Smajor1995: I DID NOTHING>

<Kristen: Omigosh! Phil, you never told me you had a family group cha with friends in it!>

<Grian: Phil>

<Grian: ur wife just stabbed you in a metaphorical way and left you to die in the snowy tundra>

<SoldarityGaming: seriously tho g>

<SolidarityGaming: wat u want>

<LDShadowlady: Jimmy don't tell me youre playing with the creepers again.>

SolidarityGaming has sent 15 images

<SolidarityGaming: but look at da cuties!!!!!!!>

<Grian: Did you name them?>

<SolidarityGaming: i kno better dan to tell u>

<Smajor1995: HES HAVING SO MUCH FUN HE CANT SPELL>

<Kristen: Aww! Cute babies!>

<Tommyinnit: Phil, why did Lady Death just squeal so loud that my windows broke?>

<Grian: u got a base m8!?>

<WlburSoot: making another country trying not to die again.>

<Tommyinnit: perish>

<Grian: X'D>

~~~And now back to your regularly scheduled Hermitcraft nonsense~~~

"Oh my void... Why am I not in that Group Chat?!" Tango huffed. "I can add you if you want. That way, We can annoy Timmy twice as fast!" Grian beamed. Oh no... RUN JIMMY! Tango snorted and let Grian add him to the chat. "Wait...So Nightmare is dead-dead, right?" Cub reiterated, which Grian shrugged at. "Yeah, kinda? There's a high chance he is... But Watchers are like slippery leeches in swamp water. You can catch one, but once you do, do you want to hold it any longer?" Grian questioned. "Absolutely." Tango nodded. "Because you burnt your first ever leech out of panic." Cub sighed. "It deserved it... So, when am I seeing my rancher again?" Tango asked. 

"I dunno..." Grian sighed, looking at his comm and waiting for Jimmy to say he can talk to him about this. "Hang on, Tango's got ya." Tango sighed, getting his comm and saying hello in chat. Of course, once Tango joins, Jimmy is a blabbermouth. 

~~~Back to the Minecraft fam's chat~~~

Tango has joined the chat

<Tango: hiiiii>

<SolidarityGaming: My rancher! Did you see my creeper baby pictures!? They want to meet you!!!!>

<Smajor1995: oh void>

<Smajor1995: his brain's offline, boyfriend's in the chat>

<SmallishBeans: get ready for idiot Jimmy>

<LDShadowlady: aw>

<LDShadowlady: dumb jimmy is fun jimmy>

<SolidarityGaming: Tangie, when are you free? I want you to visit the empiresserver before our finale!>

<Smajor1995: Sheet, I forgot about that.>

<SmallishBeans: Anarchy>

<Grian: y is it tango makes you light up but not ur fam?>

<SolidarityGaming: bc he makes me feel valid>

<Tango: Youre doing great sweetie, keep those baby creepers alive and healthy>

<SolidarityGaming: :D>

<Grian: WHAT>

~~In Hermitcraft~~~

Cub watched as Grian made offended chirps and puffed up his wings while he typed on his comm. "Nothing going well?" Cub asked. "Things are going great! The Empires crew will hold a meeting to see if they're down with a few of us visiting." Tango said with a smile. Grian grumbled something about Lizzie going on about planning a few weddings while she waits for the other's opinions. 

Wait...WHO"S GETTING MARRIED!?

Chapter Text

"Alright, guys... Let's skip the formalities and teasing BS, because I'm close to having a mental breakdown." Jimmy said, looking at the other emperors and emperesses, Gem was excluded, since she had already agreed and promised to be the one to give the Hermits the coordinates to the Empires server who weren't in the life series pit stop. "What's this about Jimmy?" fWhip asked, messing with his goblin ears that seemed to have more dust on them every time the two met. 

"So you all know I have a brother..." Jimmy said, trailing off at the positive hums. "And I know a few know I have another..." Jimmy continued, staring at Scott, Lizzie, and Joel. "YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER!?" Joey yelled, slamming his hands on the round table of Stratos. "Yeah... He's well-known too? He's not like Grian, no... He's married to an actual god, sorry Joel." Jimmy said, earning infuriated grumbles from Joel. "Yes, she's a real Goddess, Joel... I've seen her in her natural domain before... She's really nice if you don't anger her." Jimmy hummed, remembering meeting Kristen the first time after he got shot through a window in 3rd Life.

The poor woman made him feel at home with warm food and a story before going to bed. She was like the mother he never had, but married to his brother... Uh... Now that's awkward, isn't it? (Not really, I called my aunt mom one time because she ave me cookies for Christmas.) "What's this gotta do the meeting?" Pix asked, hugging Shelby's frog since he was getting over a panic attack when a creeper decided to give him a creeper kiss. It really just charged at him and jumped on him... But it gave him cuddles while he was frozen in fear. "Well... They wanna visit us with a few of their friends.. But they need to know how many we're comfortable with hosting..." Jimmy said, hiding behind his ten-gallon hat. It was a nervous tick he managed to develop this season. Ever since he made the decision to be a cowboy this season, he hasn't shown his face without being called a toy or having a fishing rod latched to his back and then yanked to oblivion. 

Poor Jimmy... "Oh! I can house a few, like two?" Lizzie said, smiling at the cowboy. "I can take about 4 or 5." Fwhip said. "Wow, way to one-up a lady, mister." Joel scoffs. "Says you." Lizzie sighs. "Ok, so if I math correctly, I have 7 people so far." Jimmy said. "Add 8 more, Jimmy." Scott said. "8!? I can only hold 2!" Joey huffs. "So 17 now..." Jimmy hummed, grabbing some paper off the table and a pencil he stitched into his hat's inner seam. Granted, he needed to carefully pick the seams out without damaging his hat, but he was glad that no one noticed him scribbling down numbers. "I can hold possibly 3? 4 at most, but definitely 3." Katherine said, tapping her bottom lip in consideration. "Though, I could possibly shove another 5 down in my slaying area and make them my cleaning staff..." She mumbled. "I'm going to ignore that last statement, Katherine... These guys are not that good at cleaning in the way we know it." Jimmy said. "What, they destroy items?" Joel asked. 

"Well... They have their reasons... I mean the new recruits over there are more like a family of cats who are constantly high on catnip." Jimmy said, making Scott laugh out loud. "I remember I did that to Scar's Jellie pandas once during break and they all face planted!" He laughed. "Great, you let that hell spawn out again..." Jimmy sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "If it makes you feel better, I have some room I can lend to 4." Sausage said.  "Alright... So 17 plus 3 plus 4 is... 24? Plus the extra one Katherine might be able to shove into her empire makes 25." Jimmy said. 

"Wow! You work pretty fast for a toy with stuffing in your head!" Joel teased. Jimmy threw the paper and his hat in the air and grumbled, hiding his face in his hands. He weakly yelled "I'm not a friggin toy for the millionth time, shut up about that stupid joke." He hates the joke. He hates it enough to simply hide with his town's creeper farm and let the green fuzzems lay on him to comfort him... It's quite peaceful at night with the herd. The little ones are more energetic at night, making Jimmy smile when they would chase away mean spiders by ramming into them like goats. 

"What happened to the no toy jokes, Joel?" Lizzie huffed. "I thought the meeting was done..." Joel said. "Done my foot..." Pix sighed, going to make sure Jimmy's ok. "You good, man?" Pix asked. "I'm contemplating if I'd survive the fall from here to hell with what I plan to do." Jimmy sighed. "Ooh! You plan to make out with that boyfriend you got overseas?" Pix tested, making Jimmy redden in embarrassment. Pix, unbeknownst to him, he actually was thinking about smothering Tango in love if he agrees to come over. He hopes his rancher does. He has so much he'd like to show him in his quaint little town that he hopefully hadn't seen when they had a pit stop prior to the life games. 

"No... I- He's not really overseas? More like halfway across the server hub. And no, I don't plan on making out with him, gods, what are we, high schooler girls?" Jimmy asked. "Honestly, Jims... We're the middle aged equivalent. We're servermates who are nosy about each other's relationships." Pix said. "Lizzie and Joel are married..." Jimmy whined. "Exactly! You can't just ask a man's wife 'hey! getting any love recently?' That's asking for a pummeling!" Pix said, earning a weak smile and chuckle from Jimmy. "Yeah..." He said. "Well then... 25 people visiting? Wow. That's like a whole army!" Sausage gasped, leaning back in his chair in awe. "Yea! 25 whole people!" Shelby cheered. "And about 12 or so children..." Jimmy added. 

"12 CHILDREN!?" The others yelled. "What do they do over there!? Mate like rabbits!?" Joel yelled. "No... They have a plugin that makes it so in the occasion a player cares for a mob for a certain amount of time, the mob turns into a player of their own and the caretaking player is titled as their parent and sole caretaker." Jimmy explained, earning odd looks from everyone, even Scott. "What? I know things, I have more than- Whatdya call it? Ah, yes... 'Stuffing for brains'..." Jimmy sarcastically said, getting his comm and contacting Grian and asking for a list of the kids.

"Yep... 12... Grian had to ask the server for the count and they got 12... No, wait... make that 14 if they count the two gremlins that are Pearl and Gem.." Jimmy chuckled. 12 kids on a not so PG server? Someone is going to pick up on somethings and think that's ok. "Alright, Meeting adjourned! They'll be ready to visit in about a week, see you guys then, ok?" (Which, if Loser is feeling impatient, the next chapter) Jimmy said, grabbing his hat and placing it on his head and leaving Stratos before the chorus of 'Bye toy!' rang out. 

He got on his horse and began his ride back to Tumble Town. While on the way to the mesa town, Jimmy came across a panicked crow, who immediately made eye contact with him and hid with him. Why is this little thing so afraid, you wonder... Well, there was a hoard of angry spiders after it. Poor thing! It's barely as big as Jimmy's palm and it's already struggling to survive. "Hang on, little one.." Jimmy cooed to the bird making his horse ride faster towards Tumble Town. (Forgot Jim's horse's name! AAAHHHHHHH) 

When he got to his house, he closed the doors and set the little thing on his table to assess the poor birb's damage. It's wings were badly bent, almost broken, it's legs weren't any better, but it had the fighting spirit Jimmy knew all too well. Phil had the same look when Grian and Jimmy had to leave their home without him and he yelled back that he'd find them... He did of course, in MCC. Back to the smol birdie that's currently screaming at Jimmy. 

"Ok, ok! Chillax, man! I get it, your wings are hurt, your legs hurt, you're in pain and you're sleepy, I know... Avian to avain real talk here, I wish I was you, mate..." Jimmy hummed, fixing the tiny bird up as best he could without the poor thing screaming at him more... Maybe if he fed the little thing some bread, it'll calm down... Specifically plain bread, Jimmy... A loud squawk alerted Jimmy that he pressed onto the baby's hurt wing a little too hard, making the blond panic.

"Sorry!" Jimmy yelped, making the bird some splints for their legs and wings, making them a small puff of bandages and unamused birb. "Sorry, I only know how to bind injured wings on a hybrid..." Jimmy said the blob of bandages. A small chirp came from the birb, telling him they were hungry. "Huh... Never knew I could understand birds..." Jimmy said, patting the little bird and feeding them some bread. 

Chapter Text

"Sup toy." Joel called, making the sheriff huff in annoyance and look towards the god. "Again, not a toy... I bleed..." Jimmy sighed, flinching when Smallfry began to chirp angrily at Joel. "Woah! You cannot say those words, little dude!" Jimmy said, looking at Smallfry's puffed-up form. "Don't huff at me, mate. I wasn't the one who called Joel some offensive things." Jimmy said, looking at Smallfry, who simply looked at Joel and made the best smirk a crow could make before squawking loudly. "SMALLFRY! APOLOGIZE!" Jimmy yelled while the little crow flew away. 

"What did that thing just say?" Joel asked. "I thought Gods were supposed to understand all things living. Study." Jimmy sassed, chasing after the little bird, who's squeaking chirps resembling laughter rang throughout the quaint town of Tumble Town. "Smallfry! Get back here!" Jimmy huffed, taking to the sky to chase the little crow in a much more efficient way. The shocked peep from the bird and its frantic wings began to flap more to stay out of arm reach of the sheriff. "Sheriff!? Sheriff Jimmy!?" The two heard, making both birds stop in their track to look at Norman. 

"What's up, Norman!?" Jimmy asked, swooping down to greet his deputy. Smallfry followed, crashing on Jimmy's hat and rolling off with a startled chirp. Thankfully, Jimmy was able to catch them before they died. That's all he needed, a dead midget crow who reminds him of Scar. "We've received a notice from the ancient capital... You're needed there." Norman said. "Wha- Did Pix tell you why?" Jimmy asked, placing Smallfry on the brim of his hat so they could sit and be a watch out. "No... Just that it was urgent, and the sooner you got there, the more their discovery would be learned." Norman said. "Ah jeez... And I was just about to show Smallfry how to make hay stacks." Jimmy sighed, going to his horse to saddle up and prepare for the not-so-far yet far-away trek to Pix's place.

Smallfry peeped at the fact Jimmy had wings and that he should use them more often. "What!? No way... I can't use my wings all the time... That's just inviting trouble to find Tumble Town and me." Jimmy replied, grabbing the reigns of his horse and steering said horse in the direction he needed to go. Another chirp sounded, and Jimmy snickered. "No, Joel isn't trouble... He's a little messed up in the brain, yes... But he's not trouble." Jimmy said, getting a puff in reply. "Calling him a bag of worm infested cow manure on a hot day is not a compliment, Smallfry." Jimmy sighed. Smallfry whimpered at the reprimand. "I know you meant well, and I know you have a very low filter, but some things you gotta edit your words more... I know..." Jimmy sighed. Smallfry chirped again, asking if they could listen to some music. "If I give you my comm, and let you choose promise me that you'll keep it within an acceptable age range." Jimmy said, to which the birb agreed. 

The hybrid let the birb perch on his saddle's horn to pick the music... They chose Lizzo's It's about damn time for the beginning of their trek. "Really?" Jimmy chuckled, watching the little bird shimmy around to dance with the music. Jimmy lightly kicked his ride's side softly to tell her to trot a bit, which the horse did. Somehow down the line, the songs went from Lizzo to crunchy sounding songs that had the little bird hopping about. By the time the two got to Pix's, Jimmy was bopping his head alongside a new song tha yapped about how to cook oysters in bone broth... Huh... Pix saw this from his entrance and smiled to himself. Then he recorded the scene before him and sent it to the empire's group chat. 

<Pixlriffs: Looks like our favorite Sheriff learned how to let loose!>

[Pixlriffs sent a video]

<Geminitay: OMG>

<LDShadowlady: GO JIMMY!>

<Smajor1995: Im so wrong>

<Smajor1995: imagine him naked>

<Smallishbeans: ih8uscott>

<fWhip: *airhorn noises* #cancelSmajor1995>

<Smajor1995: tf 4 y stuffed bear>

<Shubble: Wow>

<Shubble: fWhip been done dirty bros>

<Geminitay: TINY BIRB>

<LDShadowlady: u saw too!?>

<Geminitay: My protect the baby birb meter is going off.>

Pix walked out from his hidey hole and smiled when Jimmy had taken his hat off for the little bird to lay under since they tired themself out from all the dancing. "Hey, Jimmy!" Pix called, making the sheriff slam his hat back onto his head and smile awkwardly. "Pixl of the Riffs! Hello good sir! SO why'd ya call lil' ol' me to this neck o' the woods, eh?" Jimmy asked, lathering his speech with a godawful Southern replica of an accent... Jimmy let Sapnap take the southern portion. You just be Jimmy. 

"Jimmy... Cut the accent... I wanted to tell you I found these scrolls that depicted you for some odd reason." Pix said, handing the blond the set of scrolls. Jimmy opened them and he paled. "Pix... These aren't me... Um... How do I say this? That's Phil... My other brother." Jimmy said, moving to show Pix Phil's tell. "See? That mark right there is the mark of Lady Death... She's his wife, so in order for her to know where he was on the mortal plane, she left a heart mark on the side of his neck she always kisses." Jimmy explains, showing Pix the small hardcore heart on the man's neck. "But why is he fighting another god-like being?" Pix asked.

Jimm gave Pix a look then started to laugh. "That' not any god-like being! That's Joel!" Jimmy laughed. "WHat!? Why're they fighting!?" Pix asked. "That's a question I can't answer. Shoot, I can't even tell ya why everyone picks on me, mate." Jimmy sighed. "Yeah, sorry..." Pix shyly hummed. "Welp, I hope I was any help for ya..." Jimmy said. "You were more help than I bargained for, Jims! Thanks man! See ya at the festival!" PIx called, making freeze. "Fes- Festival!? When and where!?" Jimmy asked- no, panicked. He had forgotten! You try managing a suicidal crow, a herd of creepers, your hybrid status, your boyfriend on another server, and your own server constantly telling you that you're a toy and always will be.... Yeah, you'd forget a lot of things too...

"When your brothers and friends arrive, we were going to throw a festival to greet and welcome them?" Pix said as a question. "Shoot... No fireworks, ya hear?" Jimmy sternly commanded. "Why?" Pix asked. "Some of them can't handle loud bangs or noises... It makes them remember bad things..." Jimmy said. "I'll tell the others... You go back home, you hear me... And please put the baby birdie to bed..." Pix said, sighing when Jimmy nodded and hopped on his horse to ride back to Tumble Town.

While on the ride back, he heard a few taps on his hat, and he listened closely to them... Is that... Morse code? WHO TAUGHT A CROW HOW TO DO MORSE CODE!? Jimmy made a mental note to decipher whatever his crow was saying to the best of his ability whilst riding a horse home...

.... ..- -- .- -. / .. / ..-. . . .-.. / -... .- -.. / - .... .- - / -.-- --- ..- / .... .- ...- . / - --- / - .- -.- . / -.-. .- .-. . / --- ..-. / -- . / .. / -.- -. --- .-- / -.-- --- ..- .----. .-. . / --. --- .. -. --. / - --- / - . .-.. .-.. / -- . / .. - ... / ..-. .. -. . / .- -. -.. / - .... .- - / -.-- --- ..- / -.-. .- .-. . / -... ..- - / .. / ..-. . . .-.. / -... .- -.. / ..-. --- .-. / - .- -.- .. -. --. / ..- .--. / ... .--. .- -.-. . (For those who can't morse this out, check the bottom notes)

Oh that's a lot... Jimmy was able to pick out a few words but not too many. All he got was sorry, feel bad, and space... The rest were just massages to the scalp. "You don't have to be sorry for anything, nestling... You just rest up there, alright... I'll wake you in the morning." Jimmy said, smiling to the air around him when he got more taps.

-.-- --- ..- .-. . / - .... . / -.. .- -.. / .. / -. . ...- . .-. / --. --- - / .. -. / -- -.-- / .... ..- -- .- -. / .-.. .. ..-. . / .- -. -.. / -- -.-- / -.-. .-. --- .-- / .-.. .. ..-. .

"Shh, go to sleep, birdie... I'm here..." Jimmy hummed, finally making it to Tumble Town so he could tie his horse's reigns back to the post he last had her at. "Good girl, Arrow... I'll give you a good scrubbing later today. Promise." Jimmy said, nuzzling his horse's snout before he went to his own home again and took off his hat and the little crow stayed asleep on top of his head while he finished his sheriff paperwork and duties. He also made a note to fully decipher what Smallfry said during the ride home... 

"That word's gotta be dad... And there's two lives in this sentence... They had another life before being a crow... And they remember? Only kind of crow I know who can do that is..." Jimmy said, trailing off when he realized what that meant. He looked towards the body mirror in his room that pointed out to his desk and stared at the sleeping bird atop his head. 

"You're a lost child..." Jimmy whispered. The term Lost Child is a relative term for wandering spirit around Tumble Town. Many townspeople believed they were the souls of people who lost their lives in an unfair fashion, such as murder, or blind rage... The held ceremonies to help ease the soul's pain and anger, but no one knew if it worked unless no one died a week after said ceremony... It usually never happened, but there was always that 1 out of 7 that had to croak. 

Jimmy's eyes darkened at the thought of Smallfry having to go through such a painful end just to be thrown back into reality as a bird known for eating out the eyeballs of the dead. "Don't worry, Smallfry... I'll keep you safe." Jimmy said. He'd rather die protecting Smallfry than let anything happen to this bundle of chaos. 

~~~

The next day, Smallfry was up and about, doing their best to make a breakfast worthy of a sheriff of the law! They had gotten deputy Norman to help since Jimmy had begun to keep track of how many days before Smallfry could cause trouble in the small-ish town. "Could you hand me some pepper, birb?" Norman asked the bird, who quickly shot upwards and got the seasoning for the deputy while they watched as he made an avian-friendly omelet. 

A few taps from Smallfry had Norman looking up and smiling. "Hm? Whatdya say?" Norman asked, getting the same taps again. Unlike Jimmy, Norman was more fluent in Morse code and didn't need a pen and paper as often for messages. 

-. . ...- . .-. / - .... --- ..- --. .... - / .- / -.- .. - - -.-- / -.-. --- ..- .-.. -.. / -- .- -.- . / .- -. / --- -- . .-.. . - 

Norman smiled and let the bird perch on his head, purring when the little one snuggled up to his cat ears. Norman wasn't your typical, proud hybrid. He was much like Jimmy when it came to his status. Only Jimmy knew and the sheriff never used that against him. Sure, the blond would ask the cat about what types of foods he liked best or the types of meat he didn't or if catnip really was like marijuana for him. (Which is is, by the way. The number of times Norman's had to give Jimmy another stash of catnip his family sends him every month is enough to show that Norman isn't a normal kitty-human)

"The Sheriff's not like most avian's I've met. Many run from me... For being a feline while they are a primary part of our diet... But the Sheriff... He welcomed me with open arms... Literally, he hugged me the first time we met!" Norman said, not hearing Jimmy stir awake at the smell of fluffy non-eggs, carrots, potatoes, and home grown tomatoes crushed into a nice sauce... Is anyone else hungry?

"What're you guys doin'?" Jimmy yawns, getting a faceful of feathers and happy chirps. "Oh- You guys did all this for me?" Jimmy hummed, prying Smallfry off his face so he could sit down and eat what Norman made. "Well, Smalls here had an idea for you when they realized something important." Norman hummed, lightly tapping Smallfry, which the bird began to rattle out chirps and squeaks and puffed up into a ball of feathers... 

Poor Jimmy was so tired he got none of the yaps, but he did get what Smallfry said in their jumping. 

'You're my dad now, mister Sheriff! Get ready because you deserve all the love that I'm gonna drown ya in!'

That's not how you adopt a person, Smallfry... *sigh* You try so hard...

Chapter Text

Jimmy took his job a Smallfry's dad very seriously from this point forward. Every second he was paranoid for the little bird! He was constantly letting out chirps and trills to make sure the bird stayed close enough that he could grab them and run if things got bad. A familiar weight plopped on Jimmy's hat, making Jimmy's instincts relax a bit. Just as the two got into the rhythm of Smallfry flying off to play with the creepers and Jimmy calling them back when things looked a bit too rough, it happened. 

Grian joined the game

Ph1lza joined the game

ImpulseSV joined the game

Falsesymmetry joined the game

Docm77 joined the game

Rendog joined the game

ZombieCleo joined the game

Xisuma joined the game

GoodtimeswithScar joined the game

Cubfan135 joined the game

Sapnap joined the game

KarlJacobs joined the game

Beckerson joined the game

iJevin joined the game

Tubbo_ joined the game

Dream joined the game

itsFundy joined the game

Yogurt joined the game

<Smajor1995: u sure this is gonna b 25 jim?>

PearlescentMoon joined the game

Keralis joined the game

Joehillssays joined the game

BdoubleO100 joined the game

<SolidarityGaming: I'm counting 20 rn>

Michelle joined the game

Micheal joined the game 

Marshal joined the game

Ranboo joined the game

Patches joined the game

<LDShadowlady: There's 25??>

Georgenotfound joined the game

Tommyinnit joined the game

FoolishG joined the game

Tango joined the game

<Smajor1995: now that's 25>

Foolish Jr. joined the game

Finnley joined the game

Shroud joined the game

Pvp joined the game

Slimenap joined the game

<Smallishbeans: you sure there's only 12 kids?>

<Geminitay: Hi guys!!!>

<Yogurt: Auntie GEM>

<Yogurt: Ma and Pa got me one of these things!!!>

<Pvp: why do you guys decorate your paths with poisonous plants?>

<Shubble: OMG>

<Shubble: I told u those looked wrong Joey>

<JoeyGraceffa: oh bite me>

<Tango: Dont>

<Sapnap: gladly>

<KarlJacobs: I will punt you to the sun if you cheat on me>

<fWhip: relationship goals>

<Geminitay: Husband goals>

<Pixlriffs: THIS WEEK ON HERMITCRAFT>

<Geminitay: Hermits, we'll all meet you at the rift>

Jimmy sighed and looked at Smallfry, whose round, void like eyes bore back to him. "Want to go on an adventure, Fry?" Jimmy asked, earning an excited nod and cheep from the bird before the hopped up onto Jimmy's arm and clambered up to sit on his hat. Jimmy smiled and set off towards the mainland... Well where everyone else meets up with each other before they decide to go to their projects. 

Smallfry held onto Jimmy's hat while the avian used his actual wings. "You alright, birdie?" Jimmy asked Smallfry, who chirped back their response. "Great! We're about to land anyway!" Jimmy called, diving down to land softly... On top of Scot's head. "HI SCOTT!!!!" Jimmy called, hanging onto the colorful male. "Jimmy! You're heavy!" Scott yelped, waving his arms around to keep his balance. "I'm so excited! My brothers are here! And my rancher!" Jimmy chirped, making Smallfry mimic his chirps. "Also, I wanted you to meet my child, Smallfry." Jimmy said, earning a chirp.

"Hi..." Scott greeted. The two made it to the meeting point, where Jimmy jumped off Scott to launch himself at his brothers and his rancher. Smallfry followed behind, landing on Tango's shoulder and rubbing their face on his. "Oh! That's right! Everyone, meet my baby, Smallfry!" Jimmy cooed, letting out chirps of pride. Tango squeaked and looked at Dream, making the blond jump at the intense stare. "Wha- No! Tango, no!" Dream pleaded. "But... Imagine Jimmy teaching a little avian to fly! Please?! Or me teaching them to do redstone! Tango pleaded. "X!! Tango's trying to get me to give him a child!" Dream cried to the other admin. "I mean... You did basically give not one, but 2 servers children..." X said. "But I don't want to have this little thing sitting down for hours with nothing to keep them occupied!" Dream called, clinging to X, who promptly handed Dream over to Jimmy with a smile. 

"Don't worry, Jimmy. Water him at least twice a day, make sure he eats, and also take him for a walk or two every day." X laughed. Jimmy took the nervous bundle of dragon and gave X a questioning noise. "You'll see..." X said. And see did Jimmy do... Once he started the trek back to Tumble Town with Tango and Dream in tow. Thankfully, Smallfry was able to keep those two entertained by chirping their ears off. "Fry... Don't try to talk their ears off." Jimmy said to the little bird. Smallfry huffed and sat on Jimmy's hat in sadness at the fact that they couldn't talk with their new friends.

"I know... We're amazing listeners." Tango said, encouraging the little one to keep going. He may not have understood a single peep, by he has listened to Grian's bird mouth for so long, he kind of understands some things. And off Smallfry went, puffing up and hopping along Jimmy's hat brim to tell the two a story about Dusk and Dawn, the two creeper pups they were closest with. "You've got some creeper pups, Jims?" Tango asked, making the sheriff's neck turn cherry red. "Y-yeah?" Jimmy said. 

"I feel like a thrid wheel friend watching my other best friend flirt with a guy with a child." Dream said. "You kind of are, Dream, sorry..." Tango said. "No no! I now know how Sap felt when me and George would flirt with each other." Dream sighed. "You remember that far back, but you can't remember how to make an Etho-Hopper clock?" Tango sighed. "Redstone is hard to understand, man... You try having ADHD, a demon literally possessing you, whilst trying to manage your 12 moms, and have a husband and a son at the same time." Dream said. "You also had a god who looks like you and two that are literally both your best friends..." Tango said. "Yeah... The lore isn't liking you, kid." Jimmy said.

"Can you explain that, please? When we got here and the people who met us all yelled lore and threw stuff at us." Dream asked. Jimmy shrugged and turned to smile sheepishly at Dream. "It's a custom here... Used to be really bothersome when some of the others would stop by and drop random nonsense on top of you... I got crushed by a bothersome amount of deepslate once!" Jimmy huffed. "Sometimes, I feel like we're just the butt of a joke all the time..." Jimmy sighed, ignoring the two sets of growls and one set and puffing chirps surrounding him.

They made it to Tumble Town much faster than when they left. The pups in the petting pens rushed to greet the four, hissing and hopping around. "Hey, guys..." Jimmy called, hopping off Arrow and tying the reigns to a post before rushing to give the pups each a forehead bop. The pups had to jump to meet Jimmy's forehead, but still! Smallfry simply laid on top of each of the pup's heads before Jimmy had to scoop them off their head before the little one fell asleep on top of their fuzzy green bobble heads. 

"That was adorable..." Tango sniffled. "Get ready for that to multiplied by 10... By tomorrow, maybe?" Dream hummed, noticing a few more sets of steps behind them. He turned and saw his family and all the hermits with children following. "Mama!! We made it to ya!" Yogurt beamed, hopping off Fundy's back to land on Dream's. "I've noticed!" Dream smiled. Patches simply shuffled next to him and hugged him before running off to talk with Jimmy. 

"Wow, I hope people don't get caught up in that stupid toy joke too..." Jimmy said, sighing when he took a look at his humble town and then the god awful toy story walls. "Want me to set them on fire?" Sapnap asked, pouring a bottle of water on Beckerson's head. "No... I, unfortunately, didn't think of this event, so I made arson against the law here." Jimmy sighed. "Damn, Just like Dream did..." Sapnap hummed. The group was led to the tavern/hotel and were split by family. "So the Foxes will go in room 3, my brother's family is in room 12, and the arsonist and amnesiac plus their two normal sons go to the wonderous room, room 29." Jimmy hummed. "Whoooo! We got the single-digit room!" Yogurt cheered while Patches looked at the small toy sheriff. She picked it up and gave Jimmy the puppy dog eyes she uses on Tango whenever she wants to play in Decked Out without a key or token.

"Uh oh... Jimmy~ I think a little someone has a request of ya~" Tango teased, hanging on his rancher's shoulders. Jimmy looked at Patches, who blinked back at him slowly before she sniffled and hugged the toy closer. "Can... Can I keep?" She asked, looking back at Dream, who gave her a thumbs up. Jimmy's eyes watered up and he nodded, hiding his face in Tango's jacket. "Ahhhh!!!! Why do kids have to be so adorable!?" Jimmy screamed into Tango's jacket. "It's the eyes, Jimmy..." Tango said, looking at Smallfry, who was perched on Tango's shoulder. They shrugged the best they could and sat on Jimmy's head softly.

"Alright you guys... Dream, I leave Smallfry with you, and I'll be with Jimmy so he can catch me up on everything since Double Life." Tango said. "What about us!?" grain huffed. "You're big boys, you'll be fine. Just go to the rooms Jimmy gave ya, and you'll be great!" Tango said. "Give this man a boyfriend and now he's only caring about him." Scar sighed. "Isn't that anyone who is married or having a relationship?" Sapnap asked. "mm- No! We weren't like that when we started..." Karl said, looking at Sap. "We had Quackity, we couldn't be that way or he'd go and try in my biological dad's pants." Sapnap sighed. "Which Skeppy beat that bit outta him quickly." Dream hummed, picking up a tired Patches and holding her on his hip while she nodded off. 

"We'll see you in the morning, guys." Dream said.

~~~

Morning came and there was a new bipedal being running amuck in Tumble Town. "PAPA BIRD!" Jimmy heard, making his eyes shoot open and stare at the blur that is Smallfry. They arn't that small, really! They're almost at Jimmy's hip now! "Heya Fry!" Jimmy called, getting the wind knocked outta him when the kid jumped onto his chest. "BIG DAY TODAY! IT'S WAFFLE DAY!" They screamed. Now that Jimmy got a good look at the kid, he noticed they looked more like a smaller version of him, Scott and Tango together. "How did he-" Jimmy began before Tango burst in and hugged Jimmy just like Smallfry did. "Jimmy!!" Tango squealed. "Alright you two... Off ya get... It's breakfast time, and I'm hungry..." Jimmy sighed. Both masses of love groaned and whined before they got off Jimmy with pouts of their own. "Don't pout you two... I'm making waffles." The sheriff said, making the two lighten up.

Making waffles was easier said than done when you have a child and significant other in the same room. Smallfry had a knack for steal taste tests of waffle batter when Tango or Jimmy weren't looking, and Tango had a habit of kissing Jimmy's sunburnt neck. In other words, some waffles were burnt while others were undercooked. Not that they minded, of course. After breakfast, Smallfry ran to the inn, greeting the other kids there with a huge smile and an invitation to meet the creepers. All the kids yelled yes and ran off with Smallfry, meeting the pups in all their goofy early morning glory. 

"You actually gave him a kid!?" Grian hissed. "He was crying on me last night... Something about losing his revenge and missing his baby boy for so long got to me, man!" Dream yelped. This'll be fine! This is great! Everything is going according to plan! 

...

....

.........

.............

Right?

Chapter Text

Joel was not having a good time. Turns out, the sheriff's new kid has a mouth on them, and isn't afraid of a god. He had one full meeting with the kid and boy did they have many choice words for the man. Apparently, the phrase 'Airy mountains of flapping gums and false motives' calls for a break in personality and being' means 'Ya dumb chicken constantly talking yourself up so high that you've forgotten who you are and once was'. Brutal... 

But, Tumble Town has been through enough with the other empires constantly target of pranks, ill-humored jokes, and constant magical experiments. Naturally, any resident there, new or old, will be angry, bitter, or outright defensive when someone from another empire visits or moves in. In fact, Fry desperately despises Joel's guts and has made several pictures of him into small bits of confetti... They're surprisingly good with a knife... Kinda puts Bad to shame with how spot-on they can throw a knife without looking. It terrifies Joel a little with how much anger could be stored in such a small body, and how so much hurt can be housed in one pair of blue eyes that seemed to sparkle ith said hurt whenever they see Joel. 

Hermes, however, loves Fry's company whenever the kid comes with Jimmy just to make sure the sheriff returns the same way he left. With flesh and blood and not with cotton and felt. To say whenever Hermes sees their yellow and black feathers, he seems to bounce from wall to wall to be the first to meet the sheriff's kid. Like right now!

"Fry!!! Hello again! What're you guys here for today? Oh! Did thunder dad do something wrong again? I'll tell papa if he did!" Hermes huffed, making the smaller avian hide in their wings out of embarrassment. "N-no... We need to talk to your dad about another prank that was pulled n Tumble Town..." Fry said, looking Hermes in the eyes. "Oh no... What happened!?" Hermes asked, following the frontierman/boy while they walked from the entrance to Joel's study. 

Fry explained the recent prank, being a human sized doll box with a large boot and snake inside it. "Wow... Just because you guys live on the frontier!?" Hermes gasped. "Yeah..." Fry began before Jimmy kicked the god's study door down. "WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS PULLING TASTELESS PRANKS ON MY TOWN!? DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW DIFFICULT IT IS TO LIVE UP TO THE PAST SHERIFF'S EXPECTATIONS!?" Jimmy screamed, wings puffed out, and face red in anger. Terrifying Joel and the advisor in said study with him.

"Why can't you just leave us alone? Just stay away from Tumble Town from now on, or so help me, I will do something I'd rather not do." Jimmy said, grabbing Fry's hand and leaving the shaken god. Fry made eye contact with Joel and he saw the same pain. "My God... Sir Joel... May I ponder what in the heavens did you do to Tumble Town this time?" The advisor asked, looking at Joel in disappointment. "I have no clue this time. Seriously Reginald!" Joel said. "With all due respect, sir... If it wasn't for you and the toy joke, Tumble Town and Sheriff Solidarity wouldn't be fighting for their humanity." Reginald sighed. Joel had a reason for appointing the man as his advisor. He was one of the few villagers who followed Joel who also had enough braincells to muster the courage to tell Joel that he was a blazing dummy and needed to watch his words more often. 

Did the idiot listen to him? No. He never listens to him! Which means Joel ignores him every time the man comes to see him. Back on topic, Joel didn't commit the barbie-doll-box prank on Tumble Town. He didn't! He's been stuck in Stratos keeping Hermes from escaping said empire to hide with the hermits. Can you blame little Hermes? He's a gremlin looking for adventure! 

The little god ran to the tip of upper Straos just to watch his only friend fly back home. It sucked that Fry hated Joel's guts, because that meant Hermes couldn't invite the bird over for dinner with his family out of fear that said bird would jump the table and successfully kill Joel ou of hatred. Poor little Hermes... Don't worry, at least 2 people know how you feel. (Loser and whoever else had friends/family issues) So the boy watched the yellow wings of the Sheriff and the black/yellow wings of Fry get smaller and further away from his home, sighing when the two specks of color vanished from view. "I wish dad wasn't so..." Hermes began, stopping when he couldn't think of a word. "Irrational? Irritating? Bothersome? Irksome?" The boy heard, turning to see Shroud with his hands up. 

"Who-" Hermes began before Shroud smiled at him. "Sorry, My name's Shroud... Tommyinnit is my responsible adult, but I lost him when we came up here to annoy the god here..." Shroud said. "Oh... My dad..." Hermes sighed, looking off where Fry and Jimmy flew while holding his arm. "I've never seen someone like you before..." Shroud began, making the smaller look at him. "That's because my dad keeps me here." Hermes sniffled. "Oh... I have a friend who knows your pain... His name's Micheal... We used to live on a dangerous server where everyone was out to kill anything someone was attached to... My own player was scared for my life more times than I can count... Your dad's just protecting you the best way he knows how." Shroud said, making Hermes sit on a bench near the entrance of the palace. "It's still unfair! I can't see my other dad unless he comes up here, and that's not often, I can't talk with the sheriff's son without my dad storming over and dragging me away from my only friend whose willing to sneak out at the dead of night to make sure I'm eating correctly and not snacking... And I'm stuck in these suffocating walls of a palace!" Hermes yelled, making Shroud cover his ears. Spider hearing is much more sensitive than most mobs'. 

"How about we try and convince your dad to let all of us kids have a day to ourselves in... I dunno the flower kingdom?" Shroud asked. "No, Dad doesn't like pollen..." Hermes sighed. "Oh- He'd hate our home then... All we got are flowers and pollen." Shroud hummed, secreting some webbing in his mouth. The boy spit it out, groaning whenever he had to figure out what to do with it. He looked around and saw a curtain hanging nearby. It had a large hole in the middle, making Shourd get an idea. "Do you mind if I fix that hole?" Shroud asked. Hermes looked at the curtain Shroud was staring at and nodded. "Yeah... Dad doesn't take care of the silk our people gift to him..." The little god said, watching Shroud hop up from his seat and to the curtains, unravelling the webs that resembled sticky silk and got to work.

Hermes watched the spiderling work, his eyes wide in wonder! How did that ball of goop seamlessly remake those curtains!? "How did you do that!?" Hermes gasped, making Shroud shrug. "My caretaker is a tailor... Well... He sews pretty great... I'm still working on my stitch work..." Shroud reasoned, finishing up and securing the last stitch with an end stitch... Which was just him passing the needle through a loop in the thread. He remembered what Tommy taught him when he first started teaching him how to sew. Take the bunny to his burrow, loop him around and chase him inside. The bunny was the needle in this sense, but it applied to almost everything! How to tie a tie, how to tie his shoes, how to make rope, how to make fancy letters, how to make a web hammock strong enough to hold a full grown ravanger... Well... Mostly everything in a Hermit sense. 

"Your caregiver can do that too!? Do you guys take requests?" Hermes asked. "Um... It depends on the type, but usually, we do. Why?" Shroud hummed, looking at Hermes. The little boy held a finger up and ran to his room to grab the doll Sausage got him (which Joel hecking tore the head off it!) and ran back to Shroud, who had finished putting the curtains back up like he never touched them. "I'm here! Here's my request! Could you guys sew my doll's head back on?" Hermes asked. Shroud looked at the doll and paled. It had a striking resemblance to Pearl and its head was torn clean off. "I think we can... Though... We'd probably have to make a cover for the type of stitch we'll need..." Shroud said, dreading the process of having to make the kind of thread they'll need. Tommy called it immortal string, mostly because Shroud is the one who secretes said thread after he eats rabbit meat. Poor bunnies.

Hermes beamed and hugged Shroud, thanking the spiderling profusely. "No need to thank me, man... It's you who deserves the thanks... My caretaker has been itching for work ever since we got here..." Shroud explained, hugging Hermes back. The two let go and Shroud began to attach the head of dollie-Pearl back to its body with temporary stitches that'll dissolve in a few hours, just long enough to keep the toy together for the trek back Hermitopia... Or was it Hermit Land? Wasn't there another name for it?

Meanwhile, Michelle and Micheal were on decoration duty for Hermitopia. The boy and girl were stuck. "Do we go for the earthy feels or the boom-in-your-face-weirdness-that's-our-home feels?" Micheal asked her. "Hmm... I like the second one... Since it makes the most sense for us... What other kingdom starts off with a farm and then building the outside?" Michelle giggled. "True... So... What do you think we should do?" Micheal sighed. "Flowers! Everywhere! Fairy lights! We're gonna make this place so colorful even the color boy will be jealous!" Michelle yelled, hopping up to run to the resource barrels and pulled out the glowstone dust, glass bottles and string needed for her plan. "Don't forget the flowers!" Micheal called, going to the flower farm and getting some out. Both kids set off to decorate the lobby. By the time they were done, Michelle was glowing (literally, she had dust all over her like if a glitter bomb went off on her) and Micheal looked like he fell in a dye bed and climbed out with pinks, blues, purples, and yellows all over his hair and clothes. 

Yogurt and Patches joined halfway through and they were pulled away by Fundy and Dream so they could be bathed and cleaned. Poor guys... But, that's all the time we have today, since Loser has been procrastinating and panicking... So this is where we leave off on our adventure for now!

BYEEEEE

Chapter Text

"You know, Sometimes I wonder why you don't just kick that god's butt, Fry..." Yogurt said to Fry since it was Jimmy's turn to play server babysitter (Alongside Hermes because Shroud is a menace and kidnapped the child) to the gremlins. Fry looked up from their writing homework with a frown and then groaned. "I tried to... Pops stopped me and said it wasn't the right thing to do... No offense Hermes." Fry said, going back to attempting the alphabet. They're amazing at writing in Braille, morse, and somehow Cantonese... But common player tongue is like speaking Greek to an American who never bothered to learn the language... (Totally not throwing my own father under the bus, nah...) "You still struggling with ABCs?" Michelle asked, sipping the iced tea Jimmy made her since she was sweating in the heat of the mesa. Piglins are not friends with the Mesa windy heat... The nether is hot, yes... But not windy hot where the wind makes the heat run you over... Patches took sips from Michelle's tea when the girl wasn't looking. Yogurt had to move the little girl away from the other before she noticed and popped the bab upside the head. Michelle had big sister privileges! She's allowed to pop the others on the head.

"Do you think you'll be able to visit us on our new home?" Patches asked Jimmy, who was in the middle of arguing with one of the townspeople about wolves and how they should rehabilitate them instead of killing them. "Uh- Wha?" Jimmy asked the little one, who blinked at him. "Will you visit us, mister sheriff? Uncle Tangie likes your company, but that green ball keeps him too busy... I visited him with Yogies... And he looked so sad... He kept telling me how much he misses your hugs and everyone else..." Patches said holding Jimmy's hand at this point while the canary sighs and goes back to arguing. Just as the argument had gotten nowhere, Fry burst through the sheriff's office door and huffed. 

"THE WOLVES ARE BACK, DAD!" Fry yelled. "Already!?" Jimmy yelled back, hopping from his seat and dragging Patches up from her spot on the floor with her hand clenched in his own. Poor Patches dangled in Jimmy's grip like a teddy bear being held by an over-enthusiastic toddler who just met their favorite mascot. "Yes! And the Hermit kids are out there taming them!" Fry yelled. "Yay! Puppies!" Patches called out, making Jimmy look at her. "Eh-No mind me... Just a baby..." She said, looking away innocently. Jimmy pulled her up and carried her to where Fry led them, letting the girl down when she began to wiggle and whine about wanting to hug the puppers... 

Somehow, the hermit children managed to tame the alpha wolf of the pack and managed to get the pack to patrol the town for any trouble from now on. They also managed to get a cat for the creeper pups, since they seemed to get into more trouble whenever the sheriff's back was turned. So they named the kitty McNuggy... Why? Because it was on the chunky side and it reminded Slimenap of the parrot he once ate and how it tasted like nuggets... (Btw, is it weird that I'm not really as big as a fan with the DT as I once was? Maybe I'll separate these guys from their actual counterparts more than I ever have... Maybe I should give them major wardrobe changes!) But! The Pups loved the kitty, since they all loved to lay on top of the cat while the tubby nugget laid on their side to sunbathe. 

It was like a pile of green on top of a small round speck of orange. "How did those children change this town faster than all the sheriffs we've had?" Norman sighed as he watched the townspeople of Tumble Town run about more at ease than they had since the town was first founded. "It's the carefree nature they give off." Jimmy said, watching as the hermit kids were all gathered around a frog who was taking a bath in a small puddle. 

It was an adorable little phrog too! About the size of an apple, very green, huge round eyes that rival Bdub's own saucer-sized eyes. "Patches! Don't eat him!" Jimmy yelled, rushing to save the little frog from being eaten. Yogurt managed to get the frog free from the girl before she ate it. Patches pouted at this and huffed when Jimmy picked her up from the scruff of her shirt. "Don't eat those guys, kid! They're poisonous!" Jimmy scolded her. "Ooh! Murder frog!" Shroud gasped, clapping his hands to see the frog. "Thank the gods this little guy is the kid that doesn't secrete the poison... Man, you kids are weird." Jimmy sighed as Shroud poked the small frog with a blunt poking stick he crafted out of gold nuggets... That he stole from Jimmy. Poor froggy...

"Kids! Time for us to get home!" a voice called, making the hermit children perk up. "UNCLE BDUBS!" They yelled, hopping up from the dirt and running to tackle the man to the dirt. "Hey kids! Are you ready to go home? Ren and Doc made dinner tonight!" Bdubs said, making the kids 'ooh' and 'ahh' at the prospect of having RenDoc good cooking for the night. I mean, it's like going to a southern BBQ where the cook knows how to use sauce and seasoning and how to respect the grill. (I dunno where this came from, guys. Help) Bdubs waved to Jimmy and said his farewells to him before he set off with the kids in tow back home.

When the kids got home they were ushered to the washrooms so they could the mesa dust off them. Patches loved the water, but everyone else didn't... Sorry guys... You guys need baths! Dust is not fun! Trust me, you'll all get itchy. And it's not fun... After they were done bathing and washing off and getting dressed in their jammies and socks, they then get down to the dining room and plop next to their caretakers with smiles.

Chapter Text

After the rift so magically decided to sleep off the 25-person-migraine it gave itself to throw the hermits atop of the emperors... It finally decided to wake up and so graciously demand that the hermits go home... Okay, it more or less made thunderstorms and hurricanes roll and circle Hermittown- Hermit tower? What was the name of the skyscraper the hermits made? Well! Apparently, fate is a butt and needs to make the hermits' life worse. How? By making Patches sick, that's how! Poor dear got covered in chlorine-contaminated water, so she got sick... Her axolotl genes made chlorine very dangerous for her and she could get deathly sick. 

Good news! This was the excuse the hermits used to get home! Bad news? The empires crew followed them. But! At least The kids could show Hermes and Fry around the server! Well... Not Yogurt and Patches. They had to be in the hospital for a few days. Yogurt got an ear infection and had to use ASL to speak for most of the time. Thankfully, Callahan was a sweetheart and kept him company for his checkups on his ear. Poor boy had to take icky medicine to get his ear back to normal... At least he learned his name sign is Fox with a Y hand shape... Which is just Callahan's hand with his thumb and pinky out swiping at his nose. Patches was Fish with P... So his two hands with his left in a plank and his right with two fingers pointing down with his thumb lining up with his middle finger. 

When Lizzie saw Callahan signing with Yogurt attempting to follow. She watched as the reindeer-clad man held a one-sided conversation while the boy followed his movements. She knocked on the doorway, making the fox boy jump so high he reminded her of a spooked kitty. "Relax, little one... Just wanted to check on your ear... Your fox ears are highly sensitive and fragile..." She said. Running a kingdom full of animals has its perks! For example,she knows how to treat animal appendages better than Doc McStuffins can fix a teddy bear. Actually, how many of us have seen that kids show? It was on right as I was getting into my preteens and man those were the days of mindless fun... 

Wait- LOSER STOP RAMBLING ABOUT YOUR PAST! NO ONE CARES! (Ok, jeez, sorry, man... Just saying... Them days were fun... Sheesh) Yogurt sat as the woman wiped the water from his ears free, humming when she finished. She then turned to Patches, who was nursing a cup of filtered water and some chewable antibiotics and aspirin for her temperature to go down. "It always amazes me how technologically advanced you hermits get after 2 or three years in a barren world..." She sighed, looking at the little girl. Patches blinked at Lizzie and smiled at her.

"Hi miss mermaid..." Patches yawns, rubbing her eyes. Her medicine is designed to make her sleepy so she can gather the energy needed to heal, such a innovative idea on Ponk's part! He is in charge of the pediatrics department of the Hermitcraft Health System... Or the HHs for short. Scar wanted to call it the 'Oh-my-devine-being-are-you-dying?' department, but Quackity, who was given sign duty as his last form of parole, gave the look of 'I am not putting that on this piece of wood'. It was like Grian's 'You've gotta be shitting me' look whenever Pvp is caught outside with a bonfire the size of Texas in front of him. 

"Why hello to you too, little axolotl... How are you feeling today?" Lizzie asked the girl. "I no green no more and seepy..." Patches slurred, skipping syllables and consonants due to her tired state. "You rest your precious head, dear. Us emperors will be here for as long as you need us to be." She said. She felt terrible that this ray of sunshine of a child got sick on her server at her kingdom... Then again, she didn't know that her kingdom's water supply had chlorine in it. She didn't even sign the chlorination papers for that! So in Lizzie's mind... She felt like she owed this little girl her attention for this horrible mishap.

Not that Patches nor the children blame her, but Lizzie is the type of person who will literally cry over a dog playing dead for a treat. She's done it like 12 times whenever one of the creeper pups from Tumble Town lay on their sides and play dead for head scritches. What? Those babies are attention lovers. If they had tails, they'd never stop wagging whenever they see a bipedal individual.

Meanwhile, Dream and Fundy were arguing, like any married couple. One second, they can't decide if they should make a huge family house for season 10/9 whichever X chose (most likely 10, since Loser can't decide if they wanna be a season behind forever) or if they should just separate that season with Dream having the kids. At first, Dream mistook this argument as Fundy trying to divorce him, which resulted in a hunting knife being thrown dangerously close to Fundy's head and a threat of another being an inch on target. Then the blond mistook this as a separation topic, and then a bottle of sweet berry wine came out and was drank from the bottle, resulting in an emotional wreck of an ender dragon hybrid, who also has more episodes of gay panic than the first and second season of Good Omens on Amazon. And that thing is full of closeted gay panic, in Loser's opinion... (Then again, I make everything I watch or read gay, I just have to!)

Which leads us to here... With Fundy holding a sobbing mess that is Dream 'Boataboo' Wastaken-Minecraft, while said blond blabbed about how cute baby creepers are and how only 7% of free ranged creepers make it adult hood... Normally, Fundy would put the man to sleep... But Dream is out of control drunk and if he turns his back on him now, there's a high chance he's getting tackled and they're wrestling... This happened twice before, and look what they got. 2 kids. 

You'd think this would cement a third and Fundy can barely handle Yogurt being a protective big brother over Patches. Imagining another kid and he'd kill someone! 

Chapter Text

After 2 days in recovery, Pathes and Yogurt were as good as new! Sorta. They weren't shocked to see their parents cuddled on their son's bed cradling their daughter's plush asleep, but they were shocked at how they both managed to fit so snuggly on that small bed. "Is it me, or is papa smaller than he usually is?" Patches asked. "Nope, Dad made himself smaller. C'mon Patchie... Let's get you all dressed for outside time... Can't have us running around in our hospital clothes." Yogurt said, guiding his baby sister to her clothing drawers and picking out an outfit for her. She chose a bee shirt, flower overalls, pink slip-on shoes, and a bright yellow sun hat Scar made her out of twine.

Yogurt then helped dress the girl, only when she needed the help! Patches was getting to the 'I can do this!' phase of life and she knew how to make that known. One time she cried until she was left alone with her pebbles and paints. No one knows what she did with those pebbles, but when she was done, there were n pebbles or pain anywhere. Yogurt still thinks she ate them. Back on topic! Yogurt makes sure her fan-like fins are out and covered by her obnoxiously huge hat. Seriously, it doesn't even fit her head snuggly, it slides around when she moves to turn her head, or it falls over her eyes and she has to walk like a mummy with her arms out! It's a cute scene when that happens and all you can hear from her hat is: "Hello?! Hello!? When did the sun go to sleep!?" 

Favorite Patches moment for Gem and Pearl. Those two love playing hat peek-a-boo with Patches. By the time the girl had plopped the hat atop her head, Yogurt had finished changing from his jammies and into a set of navy blue shorts, a white t-shirt and orange shoes. He wasn't really into the bold fashion statements like everyone was. Sue him! "Ok, Patchie... Time for us to get something to eat. What're you hungry for? Mac an' cheese or soup?" Yogurt asked his baby sister, who smiled at her brother. "Fishie!" She said, making Yogurt face palm. "I don't know how to cook fish yet... Pops still hasn't taught me..." He said, not that Patches cared, she happily went to the food storage chest and got a salmon out, biting the head off of the dead fish with a smile. 

"Can never get used to you being a menace to society..." Yogurt sighed, cleaning his sister's face free of fish guts. "How do you always manage this?" He huffed, rubbing off the fish bits off his sister's face while she ate the last bit of fish. Patches looked athim and blinked while she let him finish cleaning her face off. "At least you didn't get it on your clothes." Yogurt said. "I can eat, fine! Tank you!" Patches huffed. She still has issues with the 'th' sounds when speaking... Poor baby axolotl... "Mhm... Says the smallest one of the family who still needs help with forks." Yogurt teased, earning a smack to the arm by the girl. "Webs!" She screamed, showing her webbed hands to the fox. 

The two conversed until Yogurt had eaten. He had a chicken salad with berries. A few minutes later, Dream came into the kitchen and hugged his kids tightly, rambling about being so worried and how he prayed to literally every god he could think of. Patches squeaked and pat at Dream's shoulder, smiling away. While Yogurt hugged back and said: "We weren't gonna die, mom..." 

Hey, Dream has accepted he's a mother to two children now. Same with Sapnap and George... And those two have either less or more children to worry about. Does Exdee count as a kid? Later, the kids ended up playing with the other kiddos of the server, escorting the empire kids around and telling the rich history of the structures. By rich history, they mean the tom-foolery that the hermits specialize in. Thiis gave time for the adults to figure out what was happening in the next season. 

"I dunno if I can go again..." George sighed. "You're gonna abandon Marshal!?" Stress gasped. "No no! I mean... I might not be able to make next season... I- I got offered a spot on a testing server far away..." George said. "Ooh! Is it the science experiment one where sooner or later, someone is going to break out and cause chaos? Say hi to Billzo for me!" Ranboo said, using his comm to play Fnaf Security breach and its DLC. (Not gonna lie, I did not like the DLC... JUSTICE FOR CASSIE AND ROXY) "Mom... Could you house Marshal then? That way he's surrounded by his friends and family, while George abandons us for his new friends." Dream said, stabbing George in his metaphorical stomach. "Hey! I'm not abandoning you guys! Just trying to make some money, man." George said. 

"Sure... Money... The same excuse all absent moms use..." Sapnap sighed. "You were born from a rock!" Dream yelled, making Sapnap smack his arm. "We don't discuss how each other came to existence, do we!?" The fire thrower huffed. "We do." half of the hermits said, looking at each other then at Jevin. "What? It is not my fault you guys always ask me 'where'd you go for three weeks Jev?' every summer. I figured by the third time, you guys would stop asking, but nope..." Jevin said. "How was Jevin born?" Fundy asked. "Picture this: Hermitcraft season 1... A random male villager is attacked by a huge slime, and somehow makes it out unscathed... Come to find out, Slimes don't give a rat's head about your genetic code, once you ingest a tiny bit of slime, and in about 3 days, you're all slimy yourself and being chased by your home!" Jevin huffed, crossing his arms and grabbing a bucket to sit in. 

"He's like a cat. If he fits, he sits." Impulse said, picking up said bucket and dropping rotten flesh in it, knowing Jevin will dissolve the junk.Their meeting was short lived when Hermes walked in and smiled at Dream. "Hiya, Hermes. Where's your dads?" Dream asked. The little one grabbed his hand and pat it twice. "I wish you happiness." They said, before skipping away to tackle Fry for some hugs. Poor Dream's more confused than Loser normally is when they wake up for the day.

Chapter Text

Hermes was always a child of the impossible. He has two dads (one of which he popped out of, so- yeah), best buds with the sheriff's sass master of a son, he was one with nature and basically the nephew of every literal god known to the players. Though, they don't count Joel as one, which is confusing, but not? Kristen once said to Hermes that Joel didn't count since he drank from the spring of gods, which was the birthplace of every god... So she calls him a thief, Exdee calls him a mouse, and HD has nicknamed him 'the one who has their head in a tin can'

Now, Hermes was different from the type of kid who liked being different. He's currently on Hermitcraft, home of being different and odd! He doesn't like sticking out like a sinner in a room full of god-fearing patrons! (Totally not throwing my cousins under the bus, nope) Poor boy was currently shaking in his boots when Exdee stared him down and then kneeled down to meet his eyes through his mask. "You have a gift I haven't seen in many children..." The older said, making Hermes' soul almost leave his body like in anime when the characters get either scared or witness an unexpected event. The poor kid looked at Exdee like he had grown 14 heads in the span of 8 seconds, which the god has done before and George promptly threw up while Marshal screamed and threw a pie at him. "Uh- No speaketh Godeth?" Hermes yapped, using the lessons Sausage gave him when he'd visit. 

"Remember Hermes, if any saints or gods come barging in here and asking you questions, play dumb, ok?" Those were the words that rang in Hermes' head whenever he saw Kristen, Exdee, HD, or any god-like person really. "Kid, there is no such language as that, but I commend you on following your dad's advice. But I need you listen. You have a long-forgotten gift, my dear... You have much to learn about your power, but you must be careful." Exdee said. Now, normally, Hermes will stay quiet and nod... But he's been hanging out with Fry and Shrroud, and those two alone will kill any shyness in anyone.

"Why do I feel like like that kid from the Sorcerer's Apprentice with Nicolas Cage?" Hermes asked, confusing the god. "Who?" Exdee said. Hermes, bro... STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL! I HAVE ENOUGH TROUBLE WITH MYSELF, MAN! Anywho! "Nothing... So, what? I'm like an almost extinct animal that people would pay millions of dollars to eat?" Hermes asked. Exdee sighed and placed a hand on his mask. "Why did Kristen think leaving you around a sassy crow from Phil's old chat was a good idea?" Ex sighed. "Fry used to be her husband's crow!?" Hermes gasped. "Yes, and they left, mostly due to being the slowest and smallest, and got mocked by many other crows when Phil wasn't looking... Yes, Fry complains about that every time we talk..." Exdee sighed. 

Hermes sat where he was with Exdee complaining about the countless times Fry seeks him out just to complain about his old life and if he was allowed to find those crows Phil still had and if he was allowed to make a stew with them. Which the answer is always no, that would be murder and that's illegal. "Would you hate it if your hair was suddenly neon red?" Hermes asked out of impulse. He was feeling a little awkward being a God's venting person. "Wha-" Exdee asked, confused enough to let Hermes rush away and find Dream. What? He had a vision about Dream and his family playing in a sandbox... This explains the last chapter's random Hermes entrance, but not the point! He's on a mission and he needs to complain to Fry as well... 

This leads us to Hermes and the entire kid group all around one of the diner tables in Gem's cottage-core diner with each of them sipping at milkshakes handmade by Gem herself. "And then! Get this, he just smiles and lets me leave! I mean, normally people would chase me and ask 'what do you mean?' but him? Nope!" Hermes puffs, looking at Yogurt and Patches for an explanation of Dream's reaction. All Patches could do was shrug and steal more sips from Yogurt while her own milkshake was melting. Yogurt had to push her head away and keep it at least an arm distance away from his shake before answering Hermes. "Dude, all I can tell you is that my dad is a little slow in the processing department. Knowing him, he's probably still trying figure out if you were playing around on a dare or if you were genuine in what you said. He's not used to not having another voice in his head doubting everything that he's heard." Yogurt said, making Patches drink her strawberry chocolate chip with caramel and extra whip milkshake while he drank his own cookie mix milkshake. 

"Yeah, knowing Uncle D... He's probably still hurt from the move from our old home to this one..." Michelle said, scooping her milkshake with a spoon, since straws were not her friends just yet. "Not to mention, we had to rush in making shelter for our homes, and didn't your pops get his hand hurt somehow, Yogs?" (it's pronounced Yo-gs, just a heads up) Micheal asked, which yogurt nodded to. "Not hurt... He got a nail hammered into it." Yogurt said, making Fry spit out his chocolate shake. "The what!?" Fry said, coughing after he hooked in air to speak. "Yeah... Happens all the time here?" Shroud said. "Y'all scary, man... In Tumble Town that's a rare occurrence..." Fry said. "Well, yeah... Tumble Town's very calm whereas here... Calm would be a Christmas miracle..." Beckerson said, stealing sips from Micheal and Yogurt. 

Patches was hurt that her brother would let his best friends steal sippies, but not her. #JUSTICEFORPATCHES "And it's fricking August." Slimenap and Pvp said, quoting Grian from the multitude of times the avian was put on babysitting duty while he and Scar had to decorate for their Christmas episodes. Scar still got hurt, despite Grian doing all he could to make the base Scar-proof.  "Yeah... But at least Micheal and Michelle can get their Christmas early, since they've both reached that age where they sleep through autumn and winter!" Yogurt said. "Ugh, don't remind me! Do you know how many of you guys' birthdays I'm gonna miss..." Micheal sighed. Michelle smacked his arm and looked at him like he had called her chopped liver. "And Michelle too..." Micheal added on in annoyance. "Hey, be happy you get to sleep in your bed... My mom's made an entire bunker for me." Michelle said. "Yooo! Top-tier parents there!" Marshal gasped. "Marsh... You literally have a god for a dad." Yogurt said. 

"yeah... But he's gone most of the time, doing god stuff... I'm usually stuck with mushroom and he's always asleep... I drew an entire gallery on his face by time he woke up!" Marshal groaned. "And got his comm to take a picture and then send it to the server wide chat with the caption: Marshal here, showing my dad ASLEEP AGAIN >:(" Finnely recited, making Foolish Jr. stare at him in awe. "How did you say that?" The older of the godlings gaped. "I took lessons in Aunt False's patented 'Emoticon pronunciation classes', why?" Finnely hummed, taking a huge swig of his milkshake before regretting all of his life decisions. "Augh! Brainfreeze!" the boy screeched, rubbing his head to warm his brain up. "Dummy..." Shroud laughed, rubbing the boy's head in an attempt to help. 

"Back to the matter at hand?" Hermes asked. "No worries... Dream is just floating in the sea of confusion while his literal body is wandering around aimlessly until his mind catches up with reality." Pvp said, shocking the group with his philosophical take on the matter. "Alright you guys... I think it's time you all go outside and rotate to Zedaph, now... Our hour is up." Gem called out, with a busboy box to take their milkshakes. "Wait! can we get to-go cups and scoop them in, please, Gemmy?" Yogurt pleaded. "Alright, but you better hurry." She said, handing the 14 to-go cups she had set out for them. Smart Geminitay moments here, guys.

The kids did so, with Slimenap and Foolish Jr. not needing theirs since they drank all of their milkshakes, so they handed their cups back to Gem while thanking her. The others poured theirs in their cups and all left after they helped put their Milkshake glasses in Gem's bus-box before leaving with their goodbyes. While they walked over to Zed's Rotating cube of a base, thanks to the addition of the Create mod Fundy and Tango begged X to add, now they have to figure out how to get into the box. 

"Well! This'll be fun!" Shroud yelled, cracking his knuckles. "Please stop doing that, you'll damage your joint in your fingers, then we'll have to cut your hands off, and put on artificial ones..." Yogurt said. "Wow! You can be like Uncle Doc!" Pvp squealed. "How?" Fry asked, looking at Hermes. "Magic?" The other questioned looking at the cube. "Nah, it's just utilizing our mods to the best of my ability." Zed said, making all the kids jump like cats on a hot tin roof. "Oh my- DON'T WILLY WONKA US, MAN!" Michelle yelled, punching Zed on the chest before huffing. "Sorry! I love seeing how many times I can speak up on ya!" Zed called. "We know... 'It's important to always be aware of your surroundings.' You tell us all the time." Finnely called.

Man, Hermes and Fry have a lot to do in order to get used to the Hermits. That is if they stay... Which makes Hermes wonder: Will the players take them along if they decide to leave the server for good?

Chapter Text

So school has begun for me again, well, it began like a month or so ago, and I've been struggling with keeping time for myself, school, health issues, and writing this... Thing. I'm not quitting, dear gods, no. I'm just going to take a break for a bit (maybe longer) until I can get my head screwed back on. I'm sure I'll be back by December at the earliest since that is when my current school year ends. But I can't guarantee this 100% of the way. For all I know, I may be forced to take another semester of classes for spring and I'll be gone for a longer period of time, which I don't want to do.

I do know I'll be updating a smaller story of mine, since the chapters are smaller. I know you all love (or tolerate) this story and its random arcs. But unfortunately, I can't update it as often as I'd like this year. But don't get sad in the comments, I'd still appreciate it if you guys leave your ideas in the comments or join the Discord linked somewhere above this and leave those ideas there! I promise this isn't dead-dead. This work is currently on pause while I sort out real life from fantasy. Thank you guys again for supporting this fever dream of a story, and I promise to see you all again soon. Hopefully sooner than expected!

-Loser

Chapter Text

"We need to leave." Dream said in the sincerest voice he could muster. He didn't want to leave his children and family, but he has to. Not because he's a danger to society, no, he knows he's a menace to society and Fundy. No, he has to go so his children can flourish without his reputation. Most of the hermits are getting harassed by outsiders because they were housing them. They didn't truly know about the children though, this was Dream's (and most of the Smp members who had children) only option to keep his babies safe. 

"We can't just let you guys walk away!" Stress called, ignoring the silence that fell among the server's meeting hall. "Mama... It's the only way the kid will be safe. We'll take Sam and Quackity with us... And we'll all split from each other." Dream reasoned with his better-adopted mother. "So you're all just going to cut ties to each other?" Impulse questioned, chewing on a jerky stick that was more stick than jerky. "Well..." Dream shrugged, looking at X for help. "He wants me to erase their memories of this place and each other." X said, filling the gap. 

A chorus of 'what!?' and 'you can do that?' rang from the hall. Sapnap whistled to get everyone's attention. "Listen, I may not like that idea, but if it means our kid stay safe with you guys and you all raise them right, I'm fine with forgetting everything," Sapnap replied, ignoring the gut-wrenching sob that rng from Bdubs. "I know we made semi good impression on you guys... But sometimes, even the best of impressions leave an unwanted mark..." Sapna finished. "Besides, Callahan's staying here!" Tommy yelled, making Dream sigh. 

"Which is good, since the kids will be curious to where their adults went." Beef called. "Hang on- You guys are leaving?" Jimmy asked, lost and confused. "Yes, Jimster... We've been over this 12 times." Tango said, patting the confused canary. "Why is he here again?" Etho asked, pointing a dull pencil in Jimmy's direction. "The empires crew forgot him and we're babysitting him, moving on." Tango called, making most of the life smp players snicker. "Nah, he couldn't let the canary go. They're plotting the next game." Grian laughed. 

"Aren't you in charge of that?" Scar huffed, making Grian curse in galactic. "Whenever you speak that cursed language, I have the undying urge to eat crunchy wheat." Gem joked. "Ooooh- Baked wheat." Pearl chimed in. "Back to the topic! Our last day here will be the end of this week." Dream called. "It's Friday!" Zedaph called. "Does that mean next Friday they leave or this Sunday?" Hypno asked Keralis, who blinked and smiled. "I vote next Friday!" Stress screamed.

"Stress, this isn't up for voting... It depends on when their week begins, ours begin on Sundays." X called. "We leave on Monday. So we have the weekend to erase any presence of us this season, and the kids will be left with Callahan and you guys, 'kay?" Dream called. "I'm gonna miss my Yogurt." Fundy sniffled. "We're all going to miss our kids, Dear." Dream sighed, taking the engagement ring off his finger and handing it back to Fundy. "Keep it... I'd have no use for it if I don't remember you." Fundy smiled. "I'll have no use for it if I don't remember who I'm engaged to!" Drem fought back. 

"Give it to Yogurt or Patches... Leave whatever you can't carry for them to remember you." False called, darkening this somber meeting. "Man, I feel like I'm in a funeral's reception." Jimmy whisper-yelled to Impulse, making the other spit out his water with a snort. "You can't just say that, Jimmy!" Impulse coughed. 

~~~

Monday came and the children all awoke confused. Why was there a missing part of them now? They could've sworn they felt complete yesterday. "Patchie... Patchie!" Yogurt called, shaking his dozing sister awake. She rolled off her bed with a squeak and glared at her big brother. "Wat?" She huffed. "Do you feel empty?" Yogurt asked. "I'm hungry." She replied. "Let's go see if Callahan's made something yet, ok?" Yogurt called, looking at the handmade blanket folded on his bed. Callahan doesn't knit or crochet.

The children all huddled at the dining table, talking about while Callahan and some of the hermits took care of Breakfast. "By the way, does anyone else feel odd?" Yogurt asked the group. He didn't expect much, but the responses he got confirmed his suspicions.

"Yep."

Chapter Text

[Dream's pov]

I remember everything. How I left my kids, my possible husband, my adoptive family, everything. I can't keep pretending I don't remember. I miss my son and daughter. I miss my family... I miss my teachers... I can't do this anymore. I'm going to find my family, screw being the admin of this godforsaken server. I don't want this. I don't want to see these people. I want my home. 

I wake up, grab a duffle bag big enough to hold a month's worth of food, water, and clothing, write out a goodbye message in the global chat and transfer Adminship to the guy who is my co-admin. Jerry? Terry? What the hell was his name? Curse past me for not caring enough to know his name! "Ok... Um... Hey guys... Goodbye... Don't worry, just going away for a bit, or a while... Oh what else should I say? That looks good enough! And send!" I say, hitting send and disconnecting myself from the server chat, zipping my bag up and running out towards the Hub portal. I ignore the series of yells when members see me. 

My focus is that portal. I'm going home. And if anyone gets in my way, I'll go through them.

{3rd person cause we're out of that territory, how do you guys like these transitions? Testing things out}

Dream went through the hub portal only bruising his knuckles! That's good! Okay, not for Larry, Dream's Co-admin, but does he matter at this point? Dream began to scour the directory, looking in the H category for any sign of the Hermits. He's grumbling when a familiar voice calls his name. "Dream?" 

The blond flung around, hand clutching his dagger and relaxing when he saw the person in question. "Fundy... You remember me." Dream smiled. "Well, yeah... You don't forget the man you spent most of your days pining over and raising 2 kids with." Fundy laughed. "About that... I'm going back for them." Dream said, ripping the bandaid off the gushing papercut. "So am I... I- I couldn't stand how Sam and Quackity kept trying to jail break the old SMP... Looking for that dumb book." Fundy sighed. "They do realize it doesn't work now? The entire thing is offline?" Dream asked, turning back around to look for hermitcraft. "Why are there so many H servers that start with H-A!?" Dream groaned. 

Fundy sighed and placed a hand on his shoulder. "you're on the wrong page. You're in the mature content allowed server section." Fundy smiled. "And this is why we raised 2 kids." Dream sighed, leaning on Fundy's shoulder for comfort. He missed this foxman. He missed the hour-long rambles that went over his head, how he'd complain about the sweet berries not being sweet enough, how he would give these huge eyes to Stress for a second helping of pie... Oh, he misses his mama! "I missed you... I miss our babies..." Dream whispers. "I know..." Fundy sighed, walking them over to the family friendly section.

"Ok, Hermitcraft 10, server gate 5,890,645... Sweet baby ray's sauce..." Fundy sighed. "Oh! There's the tram! Maybe they got one that goes that far!" Dream called, digging out some coins for the fare. He dragged Fundy to the station, where the gate trams were waiting. They got in line to buy their tickets and gasped when they say a familiar head of messy raven hair. "Sap!" Dream called, making the boy turn around. "Hi! What brings you guys here?" Sap asked. "You heading to hermitcraft too?" Dream asked, noticing the cereal necklace on Sap's neck. The one Beckerson made him and Karl for Father's day. "You remember too?" Sap asked. "Been remembering since we left." Dream called. "And him?" Sapnap pointed to Fundy. 

"Same, just Sam and Quackity probably lost their marbles.... Trying to resurrect a dead server." Fundy sighed. "I just think Sam needs closure... Say, did you find Fran or any of Techno's hounds?" Sapnap asked. Dream nodded. "Apparently, Tom, being the clutz he is, sent Fran and the hounds to Hermitcraft 7, not ours." Dream sighed. "Hold on... That server is in the 3 millions... Maybe we can grab Fran and the hounds, and take them to Sam and the hermits?" Fundy asked. "Ugh, Dream's gonna drop Fran off. No way am I seeing my ex without a good night's sleep and a bottle of Mama Stress's cornflower wine." Sapnap sighed. "Keep forgetting you're old enough to drink hard drinks now. And that you don't have kids to worry about." Dream sighed. "Ugh- I'm old."

~~~

Dream got Fran, who was a sweet child. Green hair like Sam, a happy smile that made her round chubby cheeks bulge like a creeper's, bright black eyes, and a small gold anklet that was similar to Sam's crown... She was an early Awesamdude lookalike if Sam was a girl and had a happy view in life. "Ok, sweetie... Let's get you to your dad." Dream smiled, walking up to the sanctuary server Sam and Quackity inhabit. It was a public server, meaning anyone can visit. They entered and greeting filled their vision. 

"Wel- Weh- Can you read this?" Fran asked, looking to Dream for help. "Welcome to RespiteSMP. We are happy you have decided to get the help you desperately need or desire- Oh my gods this is depressing..." Dream gasps, holding fran's hand. "What's respite?" Fran asked. "You don't wanna know honey. Let's get your dad out." Dream smiles. They find Sam, who is hunched over a set of server books, and Fran gasps. "Is that my papa?" She asked. "Unfortunately. Stay behind me, ok?" Dream calls, ushering Fran behind his legs, in case Sam lunges. 

"Sam!" Dream calls, making the man turn and growl. "Chill, man. I have a gift." dream called, holding his hands in surrender. Fran pokes her head out from Dream's legs and hides again. "Take off the mask." Sam huffed. "No mask, just me and little Fran." Dream said. Fran sniffled and looked at Dream. "He doesn't remember me?" Fran sniffled. "This is a trick." Sam replies. "Now why would I trick you while you're in respite care? You hardly need anymore!" Dream called. "Besides, I'm not here for malicious intentions. Past me, yeah. This me? No." Dream says. Sam looked at Dream, then at Fran, who was cowering behind Dream. "C'mon man... Don't do this... Not when your daughter is right here." Dream pleaded. 

Sam looked harder at Fran, noticing how she looked somewhat like him. "One day." Sam calls. Fran smiles and rushed to hug her papa, which made Dream's 'Mom reactions' kick in and rush after her, scooping her up before she made contact, knowing Sam's got a kicking reflex.

{Sam's pov}

This kid looks like me... Why is he here? What more can he take from me? "Fran, please try not to make any sudden moves towards his legs..." Dream tells the kid. That can't be my Fran... She died with the SMP. "But... I haven't seen papa in ever..." Fran sniffled. "Well, your papa needed help, and he couldn't come see you... Say, why don't you go out to the square through the glass doors out there? See if you can find us any snacks to share with your Papa? Yeah?" Dream asked, which the girl nodded and then frowned. "No money..." She sniffled. Dream handed her his bag of coins, when did he have that many? "I'll speak with your papa, if you need us, scream for us." Dream tells the kid, who nods and runs out. 

Dream looks at me and sighs. "Listen, I made sure my brother saved all the emotionally attached animals were sent somewhere safe. Fran's been wondering who her dad is since she grew up into a kid. She's been raised by literal visitors. People who came by Hermitcraft 7 just to tour and finish build or add onto builds! Sam, she needs her dad. She needs stability. She needs you. Not me, not Fundy, Certainly not some silly book that did nothing but cause trouble for you, me, and the server!" Dream huffed. Gods, I feel like a cheating husband who found out their wife is refusing divorce just for the kids. No, Loser, I'm not talking about you. (You better not be, Sam. I can cut you out of this as easily as clipping my nails!) 

Ok, dang. Geez. "Dream. I can't. That's not my Fran. She died." I tell him. Dream just rolled his eyes and shook his head. "You see, the thing about Admin magic, I can simply negate that. As long as your emotional attachment to your mob was over the time limit of exposure to you, they would gain the ability to become... Human. So, technically, Fran and the other emotional mobs became humans." Dream explained. He opened his mouth to continued when a screech filled our ears and Fran's small scream of "PAPA!" made both of us move. When we saw Fran, that Bastard (Oi! What did we say about cursing!?) holding her. I think his name was Paul?

"Get away from her!" Dream called, moving before I could react, and kicking Paul in the chest hard enough to make him let go of Fran. Dream scooped up Fran and glared at Paul. "Touch this little girl again with your disgustingly grubby hands again, and I'll chop them off with dull, rusty shears. Got that?" Dream called, making the man nod and scurry away. The way Dream was making sure Fran was alright and not hurt made me feel a certain way. Is this what Fundy feels whenever he watches Dream do anything? 

"I'm ok... Is Papa mad at me?" Fran sniffled. "No, no... He's not mad... Are you Sam?" Dream asked me. The tone seems to make me feel like I'm in trouble. Am I in trouble? Did I move too slow? "I'm not mad!" I say in response. Oh gods, I'm becoming like Fundy... At least Fran will help me heal. "Listen... I can take Fran with me to Hermitcraft, and we can visit every week  until you're allowed out..." Dream said. "Actually, I can leave now. I'm only here to make sure Quackity, who is the actual admitted patient here, doesn't snap." I said. I can see the anger bubbling in him now. Oh, I'm so gonna die aren't I?