Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

While creating his latest masterpiece, Shu could feel nothing but a sense of apprehension, for what, he did not know. It was true that he had never created something so large before, the size of a person only slightly shorter than Shu himself. It was true that he had never created something that had taken such a long time before, having taken close to a year. And it was true that he had never created something so lifelike before, that he almost expected it to stand up, move about, and begin speaking.

He had been a dollmaker for many years, but never had he undertaken an endeavour of such magnitude before: a human-sized, detailed, incredibly realistic doll. He had never seen the likes of this before, and perhaps never would again. Unlike his other pieces, apart from his dear Mademoiselle that is, this doll was not crafted upon another’s request; no, it was not crafted to sell.

Around a year prior, he had been overcome with the strangest feeling, the urge to create, not generally, but in another’s image. However, unlike in previous situations, the absolute mess that was his tentative relationship- if one could call it such a thing- with Nazuna sprang to mind, his inspiration, his muse was not another person, but rather, an idea. A vision of a man, and one that he felt must be given life.

And so he, like a lonesome god, began to create such life. Given that he had never created a doll of such size, it took several false starts and a great deal of time, especially as he earned nothing from it and had to create the money needed to form his vision through other dolls that he made in that time, but he had finally managed it. Finally created it.

And what a vision it was. Sparkling eyes, that of amber and lapis lazuli. Dark choppy hair, that which spoke to a life of hardship and lack of care towards it, but that still shone with its own kind of beauty. A face which exuded kindness and, somehow, love. Shu knew not what possessed him to create this, but he thanked whatever it was all the same.

Overcome by the doll’s immense beauty, he could not help but to touch it.

He reached out one hand, towards that of the doll. It was so lifelike that as he held the hand of the doll, he almost expected to feel warmth in his hand, feel those fingers squeezing back, but of course that did not happen. He felt the fabric on his skin, and almost weeped, for what, he did not know. Nothing had been lost. He-it had never been alive. How can one lose that which one never had?

He stepped away from it.

Clearly, his exhaustion after all of this work had started messing with his head. Regardless of size or level of detail, a doll was a doll. A lifeless being. His mind was just playing tricks on him. Still, such a lifelike imitation of humanity, inhuman though it may be, was sure to sell for a good price. Although his original intention was not to sell the thing, he couldn’t help but to feel unnerved by its presence. Anything that could stir up such great emotion in him as to almost bring him to tears sounded like more trouble than it was worth.

Despite this, as he made for the room’s exit, he couldn’t help but to pause for a second, and look back. From this distance, the doll- for that was what it was, he reminded himself- looked even more human. The stitches, while hard to see even when up very close, were downright invisible at this point, and the eyes, still visibly mismatched even from afar, gleamed with a light seeming to come from within, not without. Even so, he chastised himself for his foolish sentimentality and began to exit the room when-

A sound.

A breath.

Not his.

It was coming from the doll.

He could see its chest begin to rise and fall, even from across the room. The glint in the eyes was only more clear now, as those eyes stared back at him. Its-his mouth, no longer merely a sewed-on line, quirked up into a smile. From that point on, though, Shu’s vision of him was obscured, as the tears that had threatened to come out earlier were now back with a vengeance, blurring his vision beyond all comprehension. That no longer mattered, as, almost unconsciously, he began to walk forward, forward towards his creation brought to life.

Slowly stepping towards his creation, he urged himself to move faster, reach him quicker, but alas, he could not. Slowly, slowly, ever slowly- he was almost there. Close enough to him to feel his breath on his skin-

Breath!

Life!

A reminder that he had somehow, somehow, come to life. Outstretching his arms, reaching towards him, he saw the creation opposite him mirror his movements. He met him in an embrace. And the warmth-

Oh the warmth! Surely, surely, he must be alive. No one but a human could possibly be that warm. And the tears-

Oh the tears! Not Shu’s own, although they had yet to stop falling since he had started crying, but the tears wetting his shoulder, the tears that could not have come from anyone but the man in his arms. The man pulled back, just a little, not enough to leave Shu’s embrace- lucky for him, as he didn’t know what he would do without this newfound warmth- but just enough for him to see his face. And this was the final proof, proof that this man could not possibly be anything but a human: a doll could never have a grin so wide.

Chapter Text

Like 10 minutes later:

Shu continued to kiss down Mika’s neck, beginning to take his clothes off, to enthusiastic responses, only to see… nothing? Laid bare before him, everything there was smooth and, in a certain crucial area, non-existent, like a… doll’s. Shu realised in an instant what had caused this problem. However, he was unable to voice this, as Mika had started whining, differently to the rather more positive whining of a few seconds prior, upon realising Shu had stopped, before looking down and promptly freaking out.

“Oshi-saaaan!!! Why’s there nothin’ there?!”

“I suppose that when making a doll, that, might I add, I had no idea would come to life, my priorities did not include creating ways to fuck said doll, my apologies.”

“Well ya should be sorry! Ya really should’ve thought of that!”

“They do say that hindsight tends to be clearer than one’s view at the time.”

“At least ya have a workin’ hind! ‘Nd front fer that matter! Some ‘f us don’t get that much!”

To be fair, Shu’s front was working a lot less than it had been before this new revelation, but to be a bit fairer, he did at least have something there.

“So, what do you want me to do about it?” He demanded, not really expecting an answer, but receiving one nonetheless.

“Ya’ll just have to make some last minute adjustments then!”

“And how exactly am I supposed to do that? You’re alive now, I’m presuming you can feel pain.”

“Hmm, can I? Haven’t checked.” Taking out a needle from one of the many scattered around, he pricked his finger, before exclaiming “Ouch! Alrighty, I c’n feel pain. Although ta be fair, that could be useful ‘n future, ‘nd quite fun too,” with that, Shu’s front started to work a bit better, before he reminded himself that this was very much not the time for that, “but that does make this whole situation right ‘ere a bit harder ta manage. Or rather, not hard at all when it should be, I s’pose. Well, only one thing fer it, d’ya have any anaesthesia?”

“Are you serious?”

“Can ya blame me? This isn’t just about this, I probably need ta eat an’ drink, right? If I ain’t got nothing down there, what am I gonna do with that then?”

“Oh dear.”

“Yeah, yer damn right, oh dear.”

“I might know a guy who knows a guy.” Although Shu was loathe to steal anaesthetics from a hospital himself, he supposed if he asked Kanata to ask that criminal cowboy childhood friend of his, he could probably get him some. Oh, how he struggled for his art.