Chapter Text
A week passed since Dakota’s disappearance. No new Pistachion sightings popped up. Milo kept his promise to Cavendish: he kept his parents updated when he would go out with his friends, and he was never alone at any moment unless he was in the safety of his own house. The lack of updates from Cavendish on his search for Dakota was a little unnerving, and Milo’s fears festered despite the emotional reprieve he had with his friends not that long ago. He kept glancing over his shoulder, thinking a Pistachion would pop up at any moment. Amidst those thoughts, he wondered which of King Pistachion’s children led the charge this time.
Cavendish made a habit of checking in on Milo every day, whether by text or by physically going to his house. During one such in-person check, Dr. D arrived with Agent P.
“Oh, I didn’t know Cavendish would be here.” Doofenshmirtz cleared his throat.
“How was the investigation?!” Milo asked Agent P, lifting the platypus agent off the ground and staring him in the eyes. “Did you find anything?!”
“Hey, hey! Easy with the platypus!” Doofenshmirtz scolded.
Milo set Agent P down and readjusted the animal agent’s hat. “Sorry.”
Agent P waved a hand reassuringly. He understood the teen’s concern.
“What investigation?” Cavendish demanded.
Doofenshmirtz sighed. “I wasn’t sure if you knew already, and I was worried this would freak you out. But you may as well know: Perry the Platypus was trying to track down Dakota.”
Cavendish stared at Agent P hopefully. “And? What did you find? I scoured that area where we fell many times.”
Agent P shook his head with a small chitter.
“Perry the Platypus says he didn’t find anything,” Doofenshmirtz translated sadly. “Not even tracks or anything, Perry the Platypus?”
Agent P took out his phone and typed out a message for Doofenshmirtz to relay to the group.
“Perry the Platypus says he found some tracks, but then lost the trail and found evidence of…..well, bad things that may have happened,” Doofenshmirtz reported. “There’s little chance that Dakota will be found even if you combat the forest. Combat the forest?”
Agent P chittered at him.
“Oh, comb the forest,” Doofenshmirtz corrected. “Autocorrect, am I right?”
“Then we shall! If that’s what it takes!” Cavendish said.
“Cavendish, maybe you should take a break,” Doofenshmirtz suggested. “No offense, but you look horrible.”
Cavendish’s mustache was indeed frizzy, and he had heavy bags under his eyes. “I am perfectly functional. I will not stop until Dakota is found.”
“Look, maybe I can ask Major Monobrow if he can send some bird agents out or ask some of the forest agents to keep their eyes peeled,” Doofenshmirtz offered.
“He’s my partner, and I will find him myself,” Cavendish said stubbornly. “In the meantime, Milo, you’ll keep that promise you made?”
“I’ll be safe and not travel alone,” Milo assured.
“Good. Call me if you need anything.” Cavendish tipped his hat to the others and marched from the Murphy backyard.
Agent P chittered.
“Perry the Platypus says Cavendish won’t last the week,” Doofenshmirtz translated.
“Are you sure you didn’t find any clues?” Milo asked Agent P. “Anything at all about where he is?”
Agent P shook his head.
“That doesn’t mean much,” Milo said with a forced smile. “I’m sure he’s okay. He has to be.”
Doofenshmirtz patted Milo’s shoulder. “Hey, maybe you’re right, kid. We’ve all dealt with Pistachions before. No reason to think Dakota will get killed by one now.” Agent P elbowed Doofenshmirtz’s leg.
Milo looked down. “I guess you’re right……still……”
“Hey, ‘still’ nothing!” Doofenshmirtz said cheerily. “Time to take a page out of your own advice book, Milo Murphy. You gotta keep your head up! If you need anything, you let me know. I’ve been working on a Cheer-You-Up-Inator. I have to work out a few bugs, but if you ever wanted to be a test subject for it……”
“Thanks, Dr. D,” Milo said. “I think I’m fine. Thanks for the update, too. Want to come inside for some snacks?”
Doofenshmirtz noticed a strange look in Milo’s eyes and tone. It was almost as though Milo hoped Doofenshmirtz would refuse politely. A gut feeling in his stomach told him to keep an eye on this boy. “Actually, yes, that’d be nice.”
Milo’s smile faltered slightly and then righted itself. “Great!”
Doofenshmirtz and Agent P followed Milo inside, and the former evil scientist pulled his former nemesis aside while Milo fixed some snacks for them.
“Perry the Platypus, I have a huge, ginormous favour to ask of you,” Doofenshmirtz whispered to the platypus agent. “We need eyes on Milo for the foreseeable future. Those Pistachion jerks are real nasty, and I’m a little worried about Milo doing something crazy. I would keep an eye on him, but I’m a clumsy dummkopf and won’t be able to keep up. I don’t suppose you would have time during your day to keep an eye on him?”
Agent P thought about it, and he suddenly had an idea. He gave Doofenshmirtz a thumbs-up.
“You’re the best, Perry the Platypus,” Doofenshmirtz said quietly. “I’ll make it up to you.”
That night, after he returned to his home and his boys, Perry got to work on his plan. As soon as Phineas and Ferb were deep into sleep, Perry slid off Ferb’s bed and padded over to the humongous wall calendar sitting between the boys’ desks. As Phineas once said, “You need a big calendar to keep track of the big ideas you have planned.” Perry checked the activities planned for tomorrow. There was only a big question mark. It seemed Phineas and Ferb still hadn’t decided what to do that day. Those were uncommon occurrences, and this worked exactly in Perry’s favour.
Perry found a blue pen and an eraser. He erased the question mark and scribbled “Hang out with Milo Murphy” in the empty space. That was inconspicuous enough, and was a nice cross between Ferb’s and Phineas’s handwriting so neither boy would decipher who wrote it. The idea of spending a Saturday with Milo might just sound fun enough that Phineas and Ferb wouldn’t question it. Perry returned to bed, going over to Phineas to curl up next to him.
In the morning, Phineas and Ferb got dressed and checked their calendar.
“Do you remember when we updated our calendar, Ferb?” Phineas asked.
Ferb shrugged.
“Well, a day with Milo sure sounds fun! Who knows what kind of Murphy’s Law we’ll encounter? Let’s go!” Phineas led the way out the door, scooping up Perry as he did. “Come on, Perry! You can play with Milo’s dog while we’re there!”
The boys opted to use their recently invented Spring Shoes, bouncing their way across the Tri-State Area to get to Milo’s house. Imagine their surprise when they bumped into Milo on the way. Mid-bounce, the springs in their shoes fell off, and they landed on an awning and then on their own two feet on the ground outside a supermarket. They ended up falling in Milo’s path as he walked down the sidewalk.
“Hey Milo!” Phineas greeted. “We thought we’d see you at your place.”
“My place?” Milo asked.
“Well, with our plans to hang out today, we thought your home would be better prepared and insured for Murphy’s Law-related incidents,” Phineas explained. “We brought Perry along to play!”
“Uh, that’s great.” Milo scrambled for an excuse. “But I didn’t bring Diogee!”
“Isn’t that him right there?” Phineas pointed to the brown-spotted dog next to Milo.
“Diogee, go home!” Milo snapped.
Diogee whined, tugging on Milo’s sock.
“Diogee, no!” Milo shook the dog off. “Go home! For real, this time!”
“Is everything all right, Milo?” Phineas asked.
“Yes!” Milo answered immediately.
Phineas stared at the teen quizzically. “What are you doing, anyway?”
“Uh…….”
“And why do you have a sleeping bag strapped to your backpack?”
“Well…..I’m going camping and—”
“But the weather forecast predicted rain for most of the weekend, starting in about an hour. You, of all people, wouldn’t risk the rain becoming a thunderstorm.”
“Okay, sure, but I—”
“And why do you have that bag full of snacks?”
Milo began to sweat. “It’s not what you think!”
“It looks to me like you’re going camping despite the inclement weather approaching,” Phineas said.
“It looks to me like you’re running away,” Ferb predicted.
“Which is it?” Phineas asked.
Milo sighed in defeat. “Ferb is right. I’m running away.”
“But why? What’s going on?” Phineas asked.
Milo stowed the snacks in his backpack. “The Pistachions are back. I don’t know how, but they’re after me. Dakota saved me from being captured over a week ago. He’s missing, and he might be……” Milo gulped back the lump in his throat. “I can’t help feeling guilty. Dakota would still be here if it weren’t for me. What if the Pistachions go after other people I care about? If I leave, they’ll all be safe.”
“Milo, that’s really not a good idea,” Phineas insisted. “What if the Pistachions do catch you? Who knows what they’ll do to you?”
“Better than what they might do to the people I love. It’d be better if I draw the Pistachions away from the Tri-State Area; and if they find me, I’ll tell them to let Dakota go in exchange for me,” Milo insisted. “Dakota might be really hurt, or worse, and he wouldn’t be there if he hadn’t been so worried for my own safety.”
“Running away and risking your life is a lousy way to treat Dakota’s sacrifice,” Ferb pointed out.
Milo glared at them. “Don’t try to stop me. And Diogee, go home right now!”
Diogee barked, in a sort of defiant tone.
“Milo, we can’t let you do this,” Phineas declared. “How could we call ourselves your friends if we didn’t try to help you?”
“That’s just the problem! I don’t want anyone else to get hurt because of me!” Milo snapped. “I can keep you safe from Murphy’s Law, but I don’t know how to protect you from Pistachions hunting me down. It’s better if you just leave.”
“Not happening.” Phineas set Perry down and crossed his arms. Ferb did the same.
Milo sighed. “Well, I guess if I have no choice—hey, look! Spare rocket parts for sale!”
“Really, where?” Phineas and Ferb turned to look, only to realise they’d been duped. When they looked back again, Milo was sprinting away from them. “Milo, wait!” Phineas called. He, Ferb, Perry, and Diogee ran after Milo.
Being a Murphy meant having a lot of running experience, which meant having some decent lungs that helped with singing while evading capture.
Don’t follow me, guys, you don’t understand
This is all for the best, why can’t you see?
Enough damage has been done, it’s all my fault
I’m doing this for your own safety
Murphy’s Law continued to strike, as expected, though not nearly as bad with Phineas and Ferb around emitting their positive probability ions. Milo could react in an instant to avoid hazards or being slowed down. Phineas and Ferb were adaptable and had gotten better at responding to Murphy’s Law since befriending Milo. Still, it took great effort to stay on Milo’s tail as the Murphy boy began to purposefully do things to slow them down. Even Perry and Diogee struggled to keep up.
I don’t want to see my friends get hurt
And I don’t know what else to do
If this means you’ll be okay, that’s fine
Why won’t you let me do this for you?
Phineas and Ferb managed to get in Milo’s path to stop him. When Milo turned, Diogee and Perry were there to stand in the way.
“Milo, this is not the way,” Phineas pleaded. “You can’t run away from us, and we won’t let you surrender yourself to those plant monsters.”
“I don’t recall asking your permission!” Milo pulled a pogo stick from his backpack and bounced over the brothers’ heads, going down the road until the pogo stick fell apart.
Milo, stop, this is a bad idea
Don’t you know what those beasts will do?
We are here because we care
All we want is to help you
As opposed to capturing Milo, Phineas and Ferb simply did what they could to catch up. Perry and Diogee herded Milo like sheepdogs, keeping him on the sidewalk and going down a straight path. Soon, Phineas and Ferb ran on either side of Milo.
Friends stick together through thick and thin
Help you to bring out the power within
There’s no need to go through this alone
Especially for someone so accident-prone!
Tears blurred Milo’s vision. He was touched by his friends’ actions, but still so scared for their safety. What if the Pistachions were watching them now? What if Phineas and Ferb were taken next? Who knows what happened to Dakota, and what might happen to Milo’s other friends or his family?
Despite his best efforts, Milo still couldn’t shake them.
I already lost one
We will find him together
There’s more fighting to be done
We got your back, no matter the weather
The predicted rain came sooner than expected, and it began to pour. Milo slipped and almost fell on his tailbone. Phineas and Ferb managed to catch Milo’s arms and yank him back on his feet. Once they were stopped, the boys’ grip turned soft.
You don’t have to fight this battle all by yourself
We’re your friends who will help you to stand tall
What can we do to alleviate your fear?
Don’t you know we’ll be there to catch you if you fall
Just open up and let us in
Give us a chance to try
Don’t succumb to the dark
It’s okay if you need to cry
Free yourself from your fear
Open up, we’re right here—
“NO!” Milo pushed them away, turned sharply, and ran up the steps to the closest building. Phineas, Ferb, Perry, and Diogee stayed right on his tail. Diogee grabbed Milo’s shorts in his teeth, and then Perry jumped onto Milo’s backpack, and Phineas and Ferb tackled Milo. All five of them ended up tangled in a spinning boulder of people and animal, rolling through the doors and into what turned out to be the library. The librarian at the checkout counter didn’t look up from her book to shush them as they passed. Other library-goers nonchalantly moved out of the way.
Finally, Phineas and Ferb landed on top of Milo, stopping their tumble deep in the reference section. Perry helped Diogee roll back onto his paws.
“Milo, that’s enough!” Phineas snapped.
“Shh!” another librarian hissed as he walked by.
“Milo, that’s enough!” Phineas lowered his voice to a whisper.
“I can’t let you guys take this risk for me!” Milo whispered back, struggling to break free. “The Pistachions are after me, not you!”
“The clear vendetta they have is why we have to do what we can to protect you!” Phineas hissed. “We can’t just stand by and watch them hurt our friend!”
“I don’t want you to protect me!” Milo insisted.
“You don’t get to decide who we want to keep safe!” Phineas growled.
“Um, guys?”
The boys stopped fighting, and they looked over to the speaker. Even Perry and Diogee followed suit. Jenney and Cavenpus stood down one of the aisles of books. Cavenpus carried an armful of books and Jenney raised an eyebrow at the boys.
“What are you doing?” Jenney whispered. “And why are you soaking wet? Did you walk here in this rain?”
“Milo’s trying to run away, and we’re attempting to stop him,” Ferb explained.
Cavenpus stepped up to the boys and leaned down to be closer to the eldest of the trio. “Milo, you are a smart young lad. You should know that running away is not the answer.”
“But the Pistachions—”
“Won’t know what hit them when we get our hands on them.” Jenney helped the boys stand. “Milo, I don’t know what I’d do if those galoots got their claws on you.”
Milo rubbed his arm. “I just…..Murphy’s Law is one thing…..but this is a person…..no, a monster who wants to hurt me and the people I care about.”
“It’s because we care that we’re trying to protect you,” Jenney said. “Listen, it’s grand that you take our safety into account. But you can’t control other people’s choices. The Pistachions are after you, and we want to stop them.”
“Let’s face it, Milo. The Pistachions are enemies to all of us. Anything we can do to delay their world-dominating plans, we have to do,” Cavenpus said.
“We can promise you that we won’t do anything reckless,” Phineas said. “But you can’t just run into danger and scare us like that, okay?”
“If you’re feeling overwhelmed or freaking out or whatever, you can text any of your friends at any time, and we’ll listen. Take it from someone who knows from experience: it’s better to let someone help you carry the burden. You’re the one who taught me that, remember?” Jenney patted Milo’s shoulder. “Besides, we’re not the only ones struggling with this. I think Mum’s onto Cavendish’s lie. She’s been texting him a lot lately and looking worried. I think she knows something is wrong.”
Milo twisted the hem of his sweater vest. “What if……what if we find Dakota…..but he’s actually……..what if he’s…..not okay?”
Nobody spoke for a moment. Diogee rubbed his head against Milo’s legs affectionately.
“It’s a bad thought, Milo,” Ferb agreed. “But if the worst-case scenario comes to pass, you’ll have a good support system to help you out.”
“At least we’ll have an answer instead of guessing. Plus, I’m sure Cavendish would need some support, too,” Jenney added. “He’s probably thinking about you a lot these days.”
Finally, Milo let out a heavy sigh. “I’m really sorry, guys.”
Jenney, Phineas, and Ferb wrapped Milo in a group hug. Even Cavenpus, Diogee, and Perry joined in. “Hey, Ferb and I need some new books on psychology and mind-reading. Want to help us search?” Phineas offered.
“Yeah, why not? I can almost guarantee a few Murphy Messes will be made. Might as well stick around to clean up.” Milo just noticed he, Ferb, Phineas, Diogee, and Perry were still dripping wet from the rain, and he pulled out towels from his backpack for them to dry off. “Jenney, care to join us?”
“I’d love to, but Cavenpus and I have a few more errands to run.” Jenney hugged Milo again. “We should hang out soon. Maybe this weekend? Just us?”
Milo paused. “Like…..a date?”
Jenney blushed. “Oh! Right, that would obviously imply…..I mean, that would be great and I had been wanting to ask you out on a proper date for a while……but it doesn’t have to be an official…..thing……we could even ask Melissa and Zack to join us and it’d be a double date but only if that would help you because—” She slapped her hands over her mouth to stop her babbling. Since taking time to evaluate her anxiety issues, Jenney concluded that most of her rambles came from moments of her brain working in overdrive due to stress. She took a calming breath. “Let’s just hang out together sometime soon. We can talk about all of this or avoid the topic altogether. Okay?”
Milo tried to brush off the awkwardness he caused. “Right. Yeah. Let’s do that. Thanks, Jenney. And if you need to talk through what you’re feeling about all this, let me know.”
“Thanks, I will.” Jenney chuckled sheepishly. “The good news is I’m getting better at not burying stuff. But it took a lot for me to learn, and I don’t want you to fall into the same rabbit hole I was stuck in for so long. Come on, Cavenpus. See you around, guys.”
Milo, Phineas, Ferb, and their pets spent the rest of the day at the library doing casual research and cleaning up after themselves (or, more specifically, Milo). When they left the library, the rain had paused, and it was getting dark.
“Maybe we could walk you home,” Phineas offered.
“No, I don’t want you guys walking home after sunset,” Milo said. “I’ll just call my parents…..oh, wait, they’re out to dinner with some friends. Sara’s on a date with Neal From The Comic Shop.”
“Is there someone we can call?” Phineas asked.
Milo pulled out his phone, thought about it, and then dialed a number. “Hey, Cavendish? I hate to bother you, but I need a ride home from the library.”
In a flash of light, the time vehicle appeared in front of the boys and their pets, and they saw Cavendish still holding his mobile phone to his ear.
“Uh…..thanks…..” Milo hung up the phone and tucked it away.
“In the car. Right now!” Cavendish barked.
“Yes, sir.” Milo hopped into the shotgun seat, Diogee on his heels.
“Can I give you boys a lift?” Cavendish offered to Phineas and Ferb.
“No, thanks!” Phineas waved to Milo. “See you around, Milo!” He picked up Perry, and then he and Ferb activated the rocket skates built into their shoes. Cavendish drove off towards Milo’s home.
“You have not been traveling alone, correct?” Cavendish asked Milo.
Milo rubbed the back of his head. “I did try to run away today. But my friends stopped me. It was really a poor plan in hindsight.”
“Indeed, it was. I figured something was amiss when you called so late in the evening. That was very irresponsible,” Cavendish scolded gently. “Giving yourself up to those beasts will not solve anything. Do not ever do this to me again, understand?”
“Yeah. Sorry.” Milo hugged his backpack like it were a teddy bear. “Hey, Cavendish?”
“Yes?”
“Do you have a family? In the future, where…..or, rather, when you’re from?”
“Yes, I do. I have parents and a little sister named Elizabeth.” Cavendish pulled out his pocket watch and gave it to Milo to look over. Milo noticed the engraving inside the watch from someone named Lizzie. “She gave me that early in my time traveler career. I still keep in touch with her. She’s my best source of support.”
“So, why do you care so much about me?” Milo handed the watch back. “You already have a family.”
“You already have a family; yet you took me and Dakota in, and even refer to us as your honorary uncles.” Cavendish chuckled and affectionately tousled Milo’s hair. “You’ve done a splendid job worming your way into our hearts.”
Milo grinned a little. “Well, it’s pretty cool to know actual time travelers. You guys are so awesome, and you know how to work with Murphy’s Law. It’s refreshing.” Milo’s smile faded. “I wish Dakota hadn’t done what he did.”
“Me, too. I would never want someone else to be harmed instead, but I wish that mission could have ended differently,” Cavendish admitted. “I wish a lot of things, Milo. I wish I had pulled him to safety before that Pistachion got him. I wish I knew where he was so I could help him. I wish we had known the full extent of the threat against you in the first place. Wishing is not going to help anything. What will help is you staying safe and me continuing my investigation.”
Milo nodded slowly. “Cavendish? Is it really possible Dakota is okay? Will we find him?”
“I’m certain of it,” Cavendish said firmly. “Until I am given solid evidence otherwise, Dakota is alive and in need of help. The moment I find him, I’ll even bring Dakota right to you so you can give him a big hug. Sound fair?”
“Yeah. Thanks,” Milo said.
When they reached the Murphy house, Cavendish walked Milo to the door. Just before knocking, Cavendish surprised Milo by pulling him into a hug.
“You mean a great deal to Dakota and me, Milo,” Cavendish said. “Please—if not for your own safety, then for my sake and peace of mind—don’t ever run away like that again.”
“I promise,” Milo assured. “I promise, Cavendish, I won’t do that again.”
“There’s a good lad,” Cavendish said with a smile. He knocked, and Sara opened the door.
“Hey, Milo!” Sara greeted. “Where have you been? It’s awfully late. I didn’t expect to beat you home.”
“I got stuck at the library,” Milo said. “Cavendish got me and Diogee home.”
“Thanks so much, Mr. Cavendish,” Sara said.
“My pleasure.” Cavendish tipped his hat. He waited for Milo to disappear into the house with Diogee. Then, Cavendish stepped closer to Sara. “Keep an eye on your brother, would you?”
“Yeah, definitely.” Sara nodded. “I heard about Dakota. How’s the search?”
“Gathering as many clues as I can, searching every possibility,” Cavendish said. “Let me deal with finding Dakota. You keep an eye on your brother.”
Sara nodded, giving Cavendish an encouraging smile. Cavendish returned to the time vehicle, heading for the future. Milo went up to his room, dropped his backpack on the floor without unpacking it, and climbed up into bed. Diogee managed to crawl up the ladder to lay with his boy.
“I’m still kind of scared, Diogee,” Milo sighed. “But Phineas and Ferb, and Jenney and Cavendish, they’re right. I can’t run. Never again.” Milo scratched Diogee by the ear. “I promise.”