Chapter Text
Chapter 9:
Embry, oddly enough, slept well that night. To the point where they also ended up waking up at a semi reasonable hour, that being six in the morning, rather than four. They laid in their bed, staring up at the stars on their ceiling, gathering their senses.
A lot of stuff happened yesterday. They were just starting to process everything. Their parents were really dead. They had always known it deep down, but now they had some form of confirmation. Oddly enough, they didn’t really feel too sad about it. They had had a few months now to mourn, even if they were in denial pretty much the entire time, now all they felt was tired. They very quickly became adjusted to life with Dr. D. Light, even if they were still figuring some things out. He wasn’t exactly like their parents, but he made them feel safe. And after so long of spending every day fearing for their life, safety was a welcome relief.
Talking with Ryo and Necrotary almost made it seem as though nothing had happened. Almost. Embry still lay in their bed, surrounded by blankets, and for the first time in a long time, actually feeling somewhat comforted by the feeling.
Yet- something felt oddly empty. They weren’t particularly sad- just- empty. Their blankets around them were warm and yet- they felt cold. Not unpleasantly so- and they certainly weren’t freezing by any means- but they felt almost unable to take in the warmth around them internally.
They sighed, and pushed their blankets aside, standing up and stretching. Mostly out of habit, they turned back to their bed, and smoothed out the blankets, before walking to the middle of the room. They knew Dr. D. Light was really tired after yesterday, so they didn’t want to wake him up just yet.
They sat down next to their train set. It wasn't really that fun to play with anymore, but they might as well give it a shot. They absentmindedly ran the little train around the track. They liked the sound it made, at least. They couldn’t really say it was ‘fun’, but it passed the time. Embry spared a quick look over to their toy box. They hadn’t really played with any of their toys in a long time, come to think of it. They should just give it a try. It might be fun, or at least pass the time.
They walked over and peaked into the box. There were a few things more suited to outside, like a jump rope and a few balls. And there were a few other things, more suited to indoors, like a couple dolls and a toy rocket ship. They picked up the ship and pressed a few of the buttons. A small led lit up and the little ship made a whirring sound that made Embry jump. They put their hands over their ears and put the toy ship back in the box.
They picked up one of the dolls. They had forgotten its name at some point. Embry rubbed one of the doll’s mitten hands in between two fingers. There were a few stitches to give the impression of fingers, and the fabric was fairly soft. They started petting the doll in their hands. Its red yarn hair almost tickled their palms as they rubbed it between their fingers. Its triangle nose was painted on, and didn’t feel that different from the rest of the face. It had a little blue dress with a white apron over it, and a little red bow near the top of the apron. Its little black shoes didn’t have a real distinction from its feet, and were easy for Embry to squeeze in their hand. The doll felt oddly comforting and familiar, despite them not remembering where or when they had gotten it, or the doll’s name. There was a small tag that probably would have said it at one point, but now it was too faded to read. They shrugged, and placed the doll on their bed, rather than back in the box. It was soft, and they might remember its name eventually, so why not?
They sat down at the foot of their bed, and a pair of bird plushes caught their eye. Of course, they remembered why they had kept these ones so prominent. Ryo and Necrotary each had this pair as well. They couldn’t remember when they had all gotten them, and whether it was at the same time, or by pure coincidence separately. But during the last few months, it had helped to be reminded of them.
What time was it now? They looked at the clock. Six thirty. That was probably still a bit too early to- a banging sound came from the basement door.
Embry jumped up as the sound filled the room- and surely- the whole house. They did the first thing that came to mind- which was to hide under their blankets and wait for it to stop-
Dr. D says it’s not real. Dr. D says it’s not real.
Embry tried to steady their breathing, their hands covering their head as they hid under their blankets. The sound of the banging only seemed to grow.
Breathe. It’s not real! It’s not real!
Then- the sound changed. Embry opened their frightened eyes, and realized where the noise was really coming from. Where it had always been coming from. It was the growls of their own stomach. The monster wasn’t real, they were just hungry. And that was normal.
They almost laughed in relief, before being interrupted again by their own stomach. They could just ignore it for now, right? It always went away after a little while. They could just wait until Dr. D. was up and they could make breakfast together again.
They laid back down in their bed and closed their eyes, not falling asleep, but enjoying the feeling at least.
Or did they fall asleep? Because the next time they opened their eyes to look at the clock, it read, ‘eight ten’.
Embry got up then.
Dr. D. Light woke up at around seven. His eyes opened, but he still felt tired. That was fine. He just needed to move around to get his blood pumping. That would wake him up. He got out of bed and sat in the wheelchair that the hospital had given him. He started doing small exercises with his arms. It helped wake him up a bit at least.
He hummed, looking at the clock. Around 8 in the morning. Embry was almost always up before he was. It was a little odd that they hadn’t made an appearance yet. Well, he might as well make breakfast and then go get them if they weren’t up already. He went into the kitchen and hummed to himself while he thought about what to make. Maybe some pancakes? He was pretty sure he wouldn’t have much trouble with pancakes. And maybe some fruit too. That sounded good.
He set to work on the pancake batter, before pouring it into a pan on the stove. Embry made their presence known to him around then, coming into the kitchen, rubbing their eye and waving. He smiled at them. “Good morning, Embry. Did you sleep well last night?”
They nodded as they came over to him. “You’re making breakfast?”
Dr. D. Light laughed. “Yes, I am. I thought pancakes sounded nice. Are you okay with that?”
“Yeah.” Embry shrugged. “Need any help?”
“Oh, you can peel a pair of oranges if you like, so we can have a fruit with our meal.”
Embry nodded and grabbed the fruit to begin picking the peel off over a bowl. Embry’s stomach growled again as the smell of the citrus began to compete with the smell of the pancakes. They flinched slightly before regaining themself and continuing to peel the orange. Their mouth watered a bit, but they resisted the urge to start eating the fruit right then, resolving to peel the other one and wait until Dr. D. Light was ready too.
It wasn’t very long before the pancakes were finished and the pair sat down to eat, each with a pancake, an orange, and a glass of milk. Dr. D. Light couldn’t help but laugh slightly as Embry eagerly started eating, quickly beginning to eat his own breakfast.
Embry stopped about halfway through eating when Dr. D. Light reminded them to take their vitamins. They drank the milk first, then filled the glass with water and swallowed the pills. Embry turned their attention to finishing up their breakfast then. To their frustration, it had become somewhat difficult for them to finish the last few bites of their pancake. They knew they used to be able to eat more, why couldn’t they now?
Dr. D. Light finished his and looked over to Embry. “It’s okay if you can’t finish it all now. You aren’t used to eating much so it’s going to take a little while for you to be able to get back to normal in this regard.”
Embry looked up at him, surprised, and nodded.
“How much more do you think you can eat?” Dr. D. Light asked, kindly.
Embry looked down at their food and felt a little sick. They closed their eyes. “I- I don’t think- any more.” they admitted.
Dr. D. Light smiled at them. “Then don’t try to force yourself right now. You’re still getting back into the habit of eating three meals a day, so it’ll take a little time before you stop feeling full so quickly.”
“Okay.” They relented. They didn’t want it to take time. Why couldn’t things just be all better now? They had Dr. D. Light now. Why did things still have to take time? How much time would it take?
Dr. D. Light caught onto Embry’s mood and decided to change the subject. “Is there anything you want to do today, Embry?”
Embry shrugged. “Not really. Lots happened yesterday.”
Dr. D. Light laughed. “I agree. How about we just take it easy then? We could do some drawing together again if you want. And maybe read some of the books you got from the library yesterday.”
Embry smiled softly and nodded, running their fingers through their hair a bit. They remembered something. “I should brush my hair first.”
“Oh, yes! That’s a good idea.” Dr. D chuckled. “Would you like me to help you again?”
“Nah, I’ve got it.” Embry said quietly as they cleaned off their dishes and put them in the sink. Dr. D. Light nodded and said he’d wait for them in the living room.
They went into the bathroom to grab the hair brush, and shut the door behind them. They hadn’t really looked at themself in the mirror for a long time now, had they? They’d glanced at their reflection in the past few months- but never actually took a good look at themself. Hairbrush in hand, they found themself staring at themself. Had they always looked like this? Had- their hair always been this white? And thin? Have their eyes always looked this- empty? And tired? Were they pale because they had been spending a lot of time inside? Or- another reason?
They turned away, shaking their head. They sat on the edge of the tub and ran the brush through their hair until they had gotten all the tangles out. They grabbed a ponytail holder from the drawer and pulled their bangs back, and then took a quick look back in the mirror. They couldn’t help themself from thinking that if this was how they had looked for the past few months, then they didn’t blame the people in town for worrying. They didn’t really have the energy to care at the time- but now, they were almost scared to see themself like this.
They shook their head and ran back out into the living room, where, sure enough, Dr. D. Light was waiting for them. They smiled in relief.
He smiled back at them, and offered them a drawing pad as they sat down beside him. They accepted it and began to doodle a few little stars on it. They didn’t really have any other ideas.
Dr. D. Light watched Embry as they doodled. He smiled at them. “You pulled your hair back today?”
Embry was startled out of their doodling and looked at Dr. D. Light. “Huh? Oh. Yeah.” They looked back at their little stars and subconsciously ran a hand over their hair again.
Dr. D. Light noted Embry’s uneasiness. Did he say something wrong? Or did he just startle them? Probably the latter. No need to jump to conclusions. “Sorry for startling you there.”
“It’s okay.” They shrugged.
“Embry- are you feeling alright?”
Embry turned to look at him like he had just asked them if grass grew on trees. “Physically, or emotionally?”
“Well- either. I suppose.”
Embry took a deep breath and hugged their knees to their chest. “I- I don’t think I’m really okay. I mean- I don’t know. I just feel tired. Not like- sleepy- but tired. And- I don’t know. I don’t look okay, do I? And- my parents- I don’t know. It’s just- it’s been so long already- and I always kind of knew that they- but now I really know and- I just don’t know.”
Dr. D. Light looked at them sadly. “It’s- certainly a lot, yes. I don’t really know how to process it either. Do you think a hug would help right now?”
Embry shook their head. “I don’t- I don’t really want to be touched right now.”
“Okay then. Is there something else I can do to give you comfort right now? I could dim the lights, or give you a blanket or stuffed animal.”
Embry looked at Dr. D. Light and nodded. “That- that’d be nice, If- you want.” They said, almost under their breath.
Dr. D. Light nodded at them kindly and dimmed the lights. He grabbed them a blanket and one of the bird stuffed animals from their room and came back, setting both the plush and blanket next to them so they could use them if they wanted to.
Embry wrapped the blanket around themself and held onto the little bird. They focused on their breathing, like Dr. D. had told them many times before. After a few minutes, they sat back up, feeling a little better. “Thank you.”
The doctor smiled again at Embry. “It was no trouble, Embry. Are you feeling any better?”
Embry nodded hesitantly. It was going to be okay. They could keep telling themself that in confidence. They weren’t sure what would happen next, but it would be okay. They turned back to Dr. D. Light. “I- think I could handle a hug now- if you want.”
“Embry, do you want a hug?”
“.. .yes …”
“Then alright.” Dr. D. Light hugged Embry, sitting them down in his lap again. They hugged him back gently, seemingly just enjoying the feeling of being close to someone. He began humming softly. The lullaby he had sang to them to help calm them down before. They recognized the song as well, and hummed along with him.
They stayed like that together for some time before Embry let go of him and hopped off of his lap. They turned the lights back on and sat down, picking up their drawing pad and a pencil. They flipped to the next page and saw Dr. D. Light do the same. They started drawing the first thing that came to mind, which happened to be flowers. It was a little hard to not think about flowers at least a little bit with Dr. D’s mask looking the way it did.
Dr. D. Light couldn’t think of much to draw either. He settled on a bear. Maybe it was because he was still thinking a bit about the next friends he had made yesterday. It was hardly the best circumstances, but he had to admit, it made him feel less alone. Embry had probably felt that way too. He didn’t have too much to complain about compared to them. His leg was healing alright from what he could tell. He might be able to handle crutches soon. Even if the doctors had been pretty insistent that he would always need some sort of walking aid, he wasn’t too upset about it. That’s just how life works. And in any case, he couldn’t see himself traveling much in the future regardless of how his leg healed. Embry needed him here, so here he would stay. At least until they were old enough to be on their own. He could probably resume traveling at that point, but that was a bit far in the future to worry about right now.
He hadn’t really expected his life to take this turn, really ever, but he just checked it off as just some of the chaos that made life so interesting at times. It was certainly interesting right now, if he looked at it a certain way. Sure, a few other descriptors came to mind, such as ‘stressful’ and ‘terrifying’, but there was no room to panic. If he could talk Embry down during a panic attack, he could do the same for himself. He just needed to focus on what needed to be done, and what could be done.
Embry continued to draw the flowers. It was starting to be a bit more fun. They were still tired, but they were pretty sure they enjoyed this.