Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Whoof. Glad I can finally take this thing off,” Phineas sighed as he slipped the fluffy wig off, setting it on the coffee table for the time being. He shifted to flop on the couch, but he paused when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

He blinked and turned around–and was immediately enveloped in a hug from his step-brother.

He stared up for a moment, then he smiled. “Ferb,” he chuckled airily as he hugged him back. “Were you worried?”

His ever-quiet second half just hugged him tighter, and Phineas shook his head. It might not have been obvious to everyone else, but him falling out of that haunted mansion earlier had almost given Ferb a heart attack.

In truth, it had nearly given Phineas one too, but he took these kinds of things on the chin. Next time, they’d have to build some sort of countermeasure for suddenly being lifted into the air by a mysterious force..

But that wasn’t what mattered right now.

“I’m right here, bro,” he squeezed the taller boy, then he leaned back to meet his gaze. “Let’s watch some tv. That one-hit-wonder documentary on the Phineas and the Ferbtones is coming on!”

Chapter Text

In the midst of the robot uprising they’d created in their own backyard, Phineas was walking around and inspecting their robot counterparts–or, more particularly, the activities that they found themselves up to.

“Let’s see.. one Phinedroid tanning, one Ferbot reading The Odyssey.. about ten pairs of Phinedroids and Ferbots building something together.. well, I’d say this is going pretty well,” he whistled. “We’ll get everything done in plenty of time at this ra–..”

He stopped in his tracks as he spotted a pair of their robot clones behind the big tree. Their hands were intertwined and they were mushing their robot faces together, clearly in an attempt to kiss.

Phineas could feel the heat of a rampaging flush creeping from his neck and up to his cheeks.

“Whoa-whoa! Y-you can’t do that, guys–we’re, i-it’s not–”

The robotic pair looked at him and hugged each other protectively, as if he was going to walk over there and push them apart.

Phineas hesitated.

“Eugh.. just–don’t let the real Ferb see, alright?”

He had already turned around and was walking away when it hit him. If these robots inhibited not just his own traits and feelings, but also his brother’s...

Chapter Text

Ferb peeked at his step-brother out of the corner of his eye. He was much more interesting than the toilet he was cleaning, if nothing else. But the look on Phineas’s face almost made him regret looking at all; as if his expression would return to its natural sunny state if he looked away again.

Phineas looked more exhausted than Ferb had ever seen him. There was fight left in him, but it wouldn’t last much longer.

They had been at the Smile Away Reformatory for about a week and it was finally getting to them. They were resilient boys, but the lack of care from the sergeant and no sign of rescue from their family was slowly chipping away at them.

Ferb set down his toothbrush and wiped his hands on his clothes, then he leaned over and placed a hand on Phineas’s shoulder.

“They’ll come for us,” he softly assured him.

Phineas sighed and leaned into Ferb’s shoulder–only to hear the sergeant’s powerful steps coming closer. By the time he entered the bathroom, they were back to work.

The sergeant lifted his chin approvingly and left the bathroom. The boys shared a longing look, then kept scrubbing.

Chapter Text

His first mistake was looking at Phineas at all during the race.

The inventor was having the time of his life; a big grin adorned his face while his messy hair was blown behind him, enjoying the force of the wind from the sheer speed they were racing at. It gave his sun-kissed skin and freckles the full attention they deserved.

It made Ferb’s heart skip a beat.

“–whoa!” Phineas cried as the chariot swerved to the side, to which Ferb blinked back to reality and quickly moved to get them back on track. “You alright, Ferb?”

Ferb stared forward and remained quiet, his response to his brother being a thumbs up. He could feel the heat in his cheeks, but he could only hope that Phineas didn’t notice.

Well, he wasn’t too worried about it. He hadn’t noticed Isabella after years, after all. And in general, he was an oblivious boy. Hell, he had a couple nicks on him from that day from small mishaps that Phineas had no idea about, too distracted building. A bit of flushed face was hardly–

“Man, your face is all red. Maybe we should pull over, do you want some water?”

Damn it.

Chapter Text

Ferb peeked out from the pool at the bottom of the mega water slide experience that he and Phineas had created. There was a TV crew in their backyard, which definitely wasn’t the strangest thing to happen in their backyard, but unusual since they hadn’t called them over themselves.

Phineas came up from the water and wiped droplets from his eyelashes, then he gasped. “Ooh! A TV crew, I bet they’re here for an interview!” he shook his dripping hair and hopped out of the pool, off to go meet the crew.

At just about mach speed, Ferb jumped out of the pool and in front of Phineas, blocking his path.

“.. Ferb?” Phineas chuckled and tried to step around him to no avail. “What’s wrong?”

Ferb’s gaze flicked down to Phineas’s shirt. Not having planned ahead for the water, Phineas was wearing a completely soaked white shirt. It was damn near transparent–but the fact that it wasn’t entirely see-through made it so.. so..

“Are you serious?” Phineas laughed. “I’m a guy. We’re both guys! I could have my shirt entirely off and it wouldn’t matter!”

Ferb didn't laugh.

Phineas rolled his eyes. “Fine. Back to the water I go.”

Chapter Text

The fight against the strange man-faced plants had been over for a while now, and yet Phineas still felt out of breath from the whole thing. He continued to recount the event as he paced around the broad part of their bedroom.

“And that fight! Isabella really saved my butt back there. Even Baljeet went berserk on those things. In fact, everyone looked like heroes out there..”

He trailed off. He had looked over at Ferb, but Ferb wasn’t looking at him.

Phineas stopped his pacing and stared. That was odd; Ferb always paid attention to him when he was talking. Usually it meant he had said something wrong.. or he hadn’t said something right.

“And you too, of course, Ferb.” Phineas added after a moment of thought, which finally caught his brother’s attention. Bingo. “Yea, you’re like my hero!”

Even though a bit of bashful color had come to Ferb’s face from the attention he had so clearly desired, he still puffed his chest with pride, which made Phineas smile.

“My hero.. oh, now that’s an idea. Maybe we can set up an old-fashioned sword-fighting competition! What do you think, Ferb, would you prefer a rapier or a claymore?”

Chapter Text

Phineas paced in front of their twin beds, where Ferb lay pale and sick. It was just the common cold, but..

“Maybe if I re-build the molecular separator, I can separate the sick cells from your body! Oh, but I would need a picture of the cells..”

Ferb gently snapped his fingers to try and get his step-brother to look at him. But when Phineas got like this, it was difficult to grab his attention.

“Ooh, or maybe I can take another crack at the time machine, and make it so that you can go back to when you weren’t sick!”

Ferb gently slapped the nightstand next to him. Phineas continued on.

“No, no, that wouldn’t work. Maybe if I..”

“Phineas.”

Finally, Phineas snapped his head to look at Ferb. His shoulders slouched.

“I know, I know.. you just need rest. But it’s not fair.”

“We’re still only..” Ferb covered his mouth with his elbow and coughed. “.. Human.”

“Human, huh..” Phineas echoed, then he looked at Ferb with a grin. “Ferb, I know what we’re going to do today!”

Ferb stared at him and sniffled. Phineas blushed and corrected himself. “Tomorrow. I know what we’re going to do tomorrow.”

Chapter Text

Phineas—who was pale, sniffling and had a tissue practically affixed to his hand—watched as Ferb laid a steaming-hot bowl of chicken noodle soup on his nightstand. He blinked.

“Did you make that just now?” he asked, eyes wide. Ferb had been gone for less than three minutes!

With a serious look in his eye, Ferb nodded; to which Phineas smiled and gave him an incredulous look. He thought it was impressive and ridiculous.

His nightstand was piled, albeit well organized, with everything you could wish for when sick. Tissues, a thermometer, medicine, warm tea with honey.. and now homemade soup.

“Ferb, it’s just a cold. I’m not dying,” he chuckled good-naturedly, which turned into a cough into his elbow. “Y-you don’t need to hover like this. You’re worse than mom!”

Ferb took a step and sat on the edge of the bed, his expression unchanged. His stance was made clear.

Phineas rolled his eyes with a slight shake of his head, light-hearted and affectionate.

“Well, I certainly don’t mind the company. At least we can finish that documentary we’ve been leaving off,” he said and reached for the remote. “We only just got to the history of the word ‘nib’!"

Chapter Text

“You know. When I asked you to teach me how to dance, this isn’t really what I had in mind,” Phineas chuckled.

After Ferb’s amazing behind-the-scenes dance showdown at LADUWS earlier that day, Phineas felt like he just had to learn some of the moves himself. So once they got home, he asked Ferb to show him how to dance.

Now in the middle of their bedroom, Phineas had one arm looped around Ferb’s shoulders with their other hands linked together, and Ferb had his other hand on Phineas’s waist, and this isn’t at all what Phineas had expected.

There was a moment of silence, and then a small smile—no, a smirk slipped onto Ferb’s lips. Phineas’s brows furrowed with confusion, which then quickly turned into a look of realization.

“Oh–! But you knew that, didn’t you?” Phineas scoffed, his cheeks warm. “Ferb, you sly dog!”

Ferb shrugged and looked away, the smirk still sat comfortably on his face. He looked so proud of himself.

“We can slow dance if you want to, bro, you just had to ask!” Phineas laughed and leaned in to be chest-to-chest. “But I still really want to learn some of those moves from earlier!”