Chapter Text
Kovit let out a hiss as he involuntarily straightened, trying to sit up against the pillow of his hospital bed. He scanned her message with a stupid grin plastered upon his face… He never thought any of his friends would want to hear from him again… He was quite sure he had lost May, Vince and Thao thought he was a complete psychopath, and he assumed Anna’s feelings were the same.
Anna: Hey Kovit… How have you been?
He could feel the awkwardness permeating from the screen as he sighed. Anna had always been an unusually sweet and selfless person, but he assumed she probably wanted to drive the point home that he was not welcomed.
Before he could respond, another message came in as if his mind was being read.
Anna: I saw the news and the articles… I hope you’re okay. I’m sorry for how Vince and Thao treated you… I should have spoken up more.
He was truly taken aback. He couldn’t help the completely sweet look that took over his face as he clutched the phone. There was going to be a ‘but,’ there was always a ‘but.’ Sighing and shoving down the compulsion to smile, he began typing back.
Kevin: I'm ok Anna… Thanks. It’s my own fault I got voted out.
Anna: That’s not what I saw… Kevin, I know we were young and wouldn’t have understood, but I know you’re a great person. I just feel it. It’s unfair to judge you because of what you are…
Anna: But I refuse to forget who you are.
Damn it...
Damn it.
He couldn’t help the wave of relief that crashed over him. That was the but? That she truly did still believe he was a person? He could barely read anything else she typed because his phone was shaking. He thought something was wrong with the screen, but then droplets of water fell onto the display, and he knew that he was suddenly… crying.
He was crying. For the first time since he found his mom torturing his grade school friend. He thought he lost the ability to cry so long ago. He wiped his eyes and looked over his shoulder, Nita quietly still on the phone with slight variances in volume. Adair must have an interesting proposal or say something to try to get under her skin. Sure, Diana wouldn’t let him kill her, but he could still get his vicious verbal knocks in however he could.
He took a shallow breath and looked down again, catching up on everything she had typed. So, she had gone out of her way to read all the articles, look at the videos they had published, and even the pending trials. She had concluded just like everybody else that he was simply the product of his environment, and he was robbed of all choices since his more formative years. He sighed in great annoyance but closed his eyes for a moment.
Why did he feel so annoyed?
It wasn’t a shift in responsibility, Mrz. Álvarez made it a point to say it’s okay to know what he did was inexcusable… He still did monstrous things which he sometimes refused to do to have some semblance of choice and control. To keep a shred of himself (whatever that was) intact. He even created his own moral compass because outside of Pat, he truly never got to develop one. He didn’t want to end up like his mother… Like Thilda… He wanted to live. He still wanted to hurt people, he still wanted to take in the sweet and slow release of agony, but maybe it was alright if he found other ways to eat his fill.
He was a monster who did monstrous things, he wasn’t even allowed to be alive according to INHUP. The only reason he was alive now was because there were people who doubted he even was one because of his outing with his sister. Other people protesting for the elimination of the list seemed to get on board when they realized Zannies were people with the possibility of having a full scope of emotions too. What proof did he have of actually being something of value other than just another malevolent enforcer? He couldn't even be anything else...
Here we are, those 'choices' again...
Apparently, Anna was the former. She knew she was talking to a Zannie, and yet what was most important to her is she was talking to Kovit. He didn’t want to say anything incriminating, so he had to gloss over some of her kind words.
Kevin: That means so much to me, thank you.
Anna: I’m so glad, Kevin. *hugs*
They began to chat about his timeline for recovery, a little bit about going to therapy and asked how she was. She said he was fine, but he shook at the memory of her pain when he saw her. How can someone go through something like that almost constantly and still be as amazing of a person, he didn’t know. But he hoped that he had enough time to learn.
He wouldn’t mind pretending to not be evil for a while.
Nita came back, giving a frustrated sigh and Kovit was idly playing Genshin Impact on his phone. She threw her phone on his bed and sat down hard beside him. All he could do was a smirk, “Done chatting with your best friend?” Nita rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. “He has a new client that he’s excited about,” Nita seemed exasperated, how Diana dealt with him and his antics, even Kovit didn’t know. With Nita’s short temper and inhumanly analytical perceptions, it was clearly going to be an entertaining time once he got back to Toronto. “He… Wants me to come there as soon as I can so I can learn the ropes.” Kovit was looking down still playing his mobile game, but a dark shadow cast upon the top of his face as his posture lowered a little, almost vulnerable. The last time they were separated, well…
Anxiety was a very mild way to put how he felt.
He still tried to feign a smile, “If Adair is reaching out to you, it’s got to be a fairly good opportunity … Or he’s going to actually show you his basement while Diana isn’t looking.” They both chuckled, Nita stretching her arms above her head. She had lost some of her muscle and began to resemble the girl he first saw at the death market. Come to think of it, this was the first time they had stayed in one place for longer than a couple of days.
The doctor told him that usually in cases like this, patients took a couple of weeks post-surgery to recover and an additional three to six months to completely heal. Because of his ‘affinity for healing rather swiftly,’ as the doctor called it, he could be cleared from discharge by next week and probably be fully recovered in a month or two. That was great news, considering he was real tired at how raw and sore he felt from his fleshy parts being perforated by a hot pinch and constantly being reminded of growing cold in a puddle of his own blood.
“Part of me doesn’t want to miss the opportunity, though.” Nita suddenly piped back up as Kovit relaxed and looked at her through a lidded gaze, turning his phone display off. He was already feeling exhausted, his gaze lacing with fatigue. He let out a sigh, “It’s okay if you go, Nita. I can take care of myself.” He opened his eyes and reached out for her hand, cupping it and pulling her forward into a hug. He winced, damning himself for the pulling in his abdomen from the sudden motion. She nuzzled into his chest, “I’m leaving tomorrow, but I can arrange for someone to be here with you.” He raised an eyebrow, “Who would possibly want to babysit a zannie?” He said with a cocked grin and a dismissive roll of his eyes.
She pressed her lips together in a tight smile, it was almost scary.
“Well, Fabricio knows if you die, there’s no reason for me not to kill him.” He spat, beginning to laugh heartily. Man, she was fucked up. Poor kid really messed with the wrong crazy chick, that’s for sure. “I’m sure he has better things to do, plus I have my own personal bodyguard. It makes me feel important.” He was smug and condescending, making Nita chuckle softly as she relaxed beside him on the bed. “I guess if he doesn’t mind keeping me company, I wouldn’t say no.” He yawned and whatever she said next he couldn’t tell, because the soft wave of slumber washed over him, and Nita probably realized she was talking to the walls when his soft snores began to escape.