Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Never in his life had Edward been cradled like a baby. Abilene had not done it. Nor had Nellie. And most certainly, Bull had not. It was a singular sensation to be held so gently and yet so fiercely, to be stared down at with so much love. Edward felt the whole of his china body flood with warmth.”

Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

The Miraculous Journey of Charlotte Bradford, Chapter 1

After mommy falls asleep and won’t wake up, the entire world becomes very scary, very quickly for Charlotte Bradford.

She sits by mommy’s side even when her body is cold and the house is cold and she gets cold. It’s winter, and mommy normally turns the heat on for at least a few hours a day so they don’t freeze, but Charlotte is too short to reach the thermostat, so she sits there wrapped in a blanket by her mommy’s silent, motionless body. 

She sits and stares.

She doesn’t eat or sleep or even go to the bathroom until there’s a knock on the door what feels like days later.

She doesn’t cry when her mommy is taken away, and she doesn’t speak to the woman who wraps her in a blanket and puts her in the back of a car and takes her somewhere warm. 

She hears words like overdose and heroine and relatives, but she doesn’t know what any of those words mean. She doesn’t know where she is or who these people are.

All she knows is that she wants her mommy.

“Hey, Charlotte,” a soft voice says, and the little girl turns to look at the woman approaching her. She’s smiling and she has pretty, light brown skin. Her hair is long and pulled back into lots of little braids, and her eyes are kind. 

She looks nice, but Charlotte still doesn’t speak. 

“Do you know where your daddy is?”

Charlotte shakes her head, because she doesn’t have a daddy. She’s never had a daddy. Mommy said that daddy left when she was a baby and never came back, so she doesn’t think her daddy ever loved her or her mommy very much. 

“Are you hungry? I have some snacks.”

Charlotte knows the woman is trying to get her to speak, she’s not stupid. And it’s not that she doesn’t want to, she just can’t. Every time she tries the words get stuck in her throat. 

She perks up, however, at the mention of snacks, and her stomach chooses that moment to growl. 

The woman laughs and holds out her hand. Charlotte stares at it, and then up at the woman’s face.

“My name is Rachel. I’m going to help you find someone to take care of you, but for now, I’m going to help you find some cookies. Sound good?”

Charlotte nods and reaches out to take Rachel’s hand. 

____________

She stays the night in a home with lots of other kids, but in the morning Rachel is back and smiling more widely than ever. 

“We found your daddy, Charlotte,” she says, and she helps Charlotte carry her backpack. Her backpack has her sweater and her bunny in it, and nothing else. She hadn’t had time to grab anything else before she’d been taken away, not that she’d had much. Mommy said they didn’t have much money, but that it was OK because they had each other. 

I don’t have a daddy, Charlotte wants to say, but her throat closes up and her chest hurts. 

She takes Rachel’s hand and lets her buckle her into the car. She stares out the window as they drive, and she counts all of the trees she sees. They live in California, mommy had said, and there aren’t many trees in the city, but she counts up to 31 before the car stops. 

Charlotte takes Rachel’s hand again once they’re out of the car, and she sticks her thumb in her mouth even though her mommy had told her that only babies suck their thumbs. She looks at the building in front of her, and it looks nice. It’s tall and has lots of windows, and there are flowers and trees out front. There’s a swingset and a small playground inside of a fence, and Charlotte can see other kids playing on it. She stares at them with wide eyes, and Rachel smiles as she bends down on the sidewalk next to her. 

“This is where your daddy lives. He lives in an apartment on the third floor. That’s the playground for the apartment complex. I bet if you ask your daddy, you could go play there.”

Charlotte nods, but she doesn’t hold out much hope. 

She doesn’t have a daddy, so she’s not going to get to stay here, even though she really wants to. 

It’s nice and clean, and it doesn’t smell like her house did. There are no sharp needles and it’s warm when they walk inside the building. 

She’s never been this warm in winter before. Mommy said that it cost too much. 

They climb the stairs, Charlotte’s little backpack on her back, and she feels her heart thumping madly in her chest as they stop outside a door with the numbers 312 on it. 

“OK, here we go,” Rachel says, and she smiles at Charlotte before she knocks. 

Charlotte hears noise on the other side of the door, and she inches behind Rachel’s legs as the lock turns and the door opens. 

“Hello,” Rachel says, and she smiles at the man who has answered the door. He’s a nice looking man, Charlotte thinks. He’s not smiling, but he has kind eyes, too, and Charlotte thinks it would be nice if she did have a daddy. 

“Hi, you must be Rachel,” the man says. He looks down at Charlotte and he looks nervous like Charlotte was on her first day of school. 

She hadn’t stayed in school long, because mommy said all of the teachers were stupid, but she’d had fun once she’d gotten to know some of her friends. 

“I… I tried to get everything ready, but like I said on the phone, I had no idea that Isabel was even pregnant. I’ve been overseas for the past six years, and … oh god, I can’t believe I have a daughter.”

Rachel chuckles and then tugs on Charlotte’s hand. 

“Well, we’re just thankful she put you on the birth certificate. It made tracking you down easier. Here, this is Charlotte.”

The man drops down on his knees and reaches a hand out, and he’s still not smiling (in fact, he looks scared), but his voice is soft se he speaks. 

“Hey, Charlotte. I… I’m your daddy.”

Charlotte looks at his hand, and then at his face, and then reaches out slowly, cautiously, and takes his hand in hers. 

She still doesn’t speak, but she smiles around her thumb as he shakes her tiny hand with his large, warm one. Charlotte hopes with all her heart that he is her daddy, because if he’s not… if she has to leave the warm, clean apartment she sees beyond the doorway… then she’ll be all alone in the world, and that's even scarier than meeting someone new. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” her daddy says softly, and then he takes her hand and guides her inside. 

Chapter Text

“You must be filled with expectancy. You must be awash in hope. You must wonder who will love you, whom you will love next.”

  Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Lucy Chen is just finishing up filling the supply caddies with new crayons — and seriously, how have they gone through so many already? It’s only December, are they eating them? — when her classroom phone rings. She frowns and glances at the clock, and then walks over to the wall by the door. 

Who in the world is calling her classroom phone at 4:15pm on a Friday afternoon?

She picks up the phone and presses it to her ear while she does a quick visual sweep of her classroom. All of the trash is picked up, the supplies are straightened, and all of the books in her classroom library have been put carefully back where they belong, colorful, inviting pictures facing outward to interest her little readers. 

Her classroom is ready for another week filled with rambunctious kindergartners, and she smiles as she thinks about all of the plans she has for the days leading up to Christmas Break. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, Ms. Chen. I’m sorry to bug you on Friday afternoon. You have a new student starting on Monday, and… well, she’s got a bit of history. Her father is here and would like to talk to us, get us up to speed. Can you come by the office for a few minutes?”

Lucy sighs but tells Principal Grey that she’ll be right there before hanging up the phone. She takes her purse and coat out of the closet and turns off the lights before closing and locking her door behind her. 

Her classroom is in the kindergarten hallway, which is closest to the office, student bathrooms, nurse, and cafeteria, so it only takes her a few minutes before she’s walking into the glass-walled room, smiling at the young girl she sees sitting with her father on the benches across from the secretary’s desk. 

“Hey, Lucy,” Principal Grey says, and he’s smiling but she can tell he’s tired, too. It’s been a long week, and their contract time ended over half an hour ago. They should be headed home, but… 

“Hi, I’m so sorry to keep you here so late,” the little girl’s dad says, and he’s standing, casting a nervous glance back at the girl who is staring at the crayons in front of her like she doesn’t know what to do with them. “Getting her enrolled took me… way too long, honestly, I meant to be done hours ago. I’m just at such a loss here. I have no idea what I’m doing, fuck.”

He’s glancing around the office like a caged animal, dragging one of his hands nervously through his hair. It’s sticking up in all directions, and Lucy knows that he’s probably been like this all day.

He looks lost.

Lucy smiles and takes pity on him, because he’s probably not used to dealing with the school stuff. 

The girl’s mother probably normally takes care of it all. 

“Why don’t we sit down and talk,” she suggests, and she can see all of the fight and anxiety bleed out of the man before her. He slumps and nods, and he looks exhausted. “My name’s Lucy. I’ll be…”

She waves in the direction of the little girl, realizing suddenly that she doesn’t know her name. 

“Charlotte,” her dad supplies tiredly. “And I’m Tim. Bradford. Tim Bradford, her father.”

“I’ll be Charlotte’s teacher, Mr. Bradford. Can we use your office, Wade?” she asks, turning to her Principal (and friend), and he nods, holding out an arm to gesture them inside. 

“By all means. I have some toys and coloring supplies that Charlotte can play with while we talk.”

Tim nods and takes Charlotte’s hand, and they all walk together into Grey’s office. He closes the door behind them, and then leads Charlotte over to a small, child sized table with stuffed animals, crayons, and markers on it in nearly arranged little baskets. Lucy has seen lots of students sit at this table to color or play while calming down from a tantrum, and she smiles as she watches Charlotte settle into the chair. 

She doesn’t touch any of the toys, however. 

She just sits there and stares across the room at her father with wide eyes.

Tim runs a hand through his hair, dischevling it even further, and then collapses into one of the grey chairs surrounding the small conference table in Grey’s office. 

“So… there’s a lot you need to know.”

Lucy takes a seat beside Tim and folds her hands in her lap, while Grey sits across from them and smiles encouragingly at the nervous father. 

“Lucy is one of the best teachers I’ve ever had the privilege of working with. She’s great with the kids and they all love her. I’m sure she’ll make sure Charlotte fits in and has a great first day on Monday,” he says comfortingly, and Tim nods, smiling at Lucy briefly before dropping his gaze again. 

“That’s good to hear. So… I just got custody of Charlotte last week. It’s… a long story, but the basic premise is that I had a girlfriend before I started my first deployment in Afghanistan. We were together when I left, and then she broke up with me by letter about a month later. I didn’t know why… until now. Shortly after I left she got involved, heavily, in drugs. And… well, she was pregnant. I didn’t know… and she never told me about Charlotte. I didn’t know,” he repeats, and he looks back at his daughter, who is now sucking her thumb and curled into a ball on the chair. 

Seeing her so alone and anxious breaks Lucy’s heart, and she can’t stand to leave the little girl by herself.

“Excuse me,” she whispers, and she stands from her chair, walks over to where Charlotte is sitting, and drops down on the floor next to her, sitting cross-legged and dropping her hands in her lap. “Can I sit with you?” she asks, and Charlotte nods. Lucy smiles at the little girl and then turns back to Grey and Tim. “I can hear just fine from here.”

Tim nods and continues, and feels a little lighter when  he sees that Charlotte’s teacher clearly has a kind heart. “So… DFS showed up on my doorstep with Charlotte last week. Her mother, um. She overdosed, and they found Charlotte sitting beside her. They said… they said that it had been about three days. She hasn’t talked since.”

Lucy glances toward the little girl, and she already knows that Charlotte is going to carve out a little space in her heart. She’s already falling in love with her soft, brown ringlets and her big, blue eyes.

“We don’t know much about her history,” Tim continues, and he pushes a small file folder across the table. Grey opens it and begins looking through it, and Lucy knows that he’ll fill her in later. “But… we do know she was born addicted to heroin. She’s small for her age, and she was likely malnourished as a baby.”

The room is silent for a moment, and Lucy keeps glancing back and forth between Charlotte and her father. 

“I wish I’d known,” Tim says, his voice soft and broken, and Lucy smiles sadly at him as she leans over and whispers into Charlotte’s ear. The little girl perks up and turns to look at Lucy, blue eyes wide, and Lucy nods, winking at her. 

Tim has a confused expression on his face, but it’s quickly wiped away when Charlotte stumbles to her feet and runs to him, wrapping her arms around his leg in a clumsy hug. 

“Hey, baby,” he whispers, and he reaches down to pick her up and settle her in his lap. She melts against his chest, her eyes blinking slowly as she sucks on her thumb. “What… what did you say to her?” he asks Lucy, and she just smiles and shrugs. 

“I said that you would probably like a hug, if she wanted to give you one. Sometimes … no offense meant here, Mr. Bradford, but sometimes kids are just waiting for permission. She’s new to you and you’re new to her, but… everyone could use a hug. And it’s clear she’s already very attached to you.”

Tim moves one of his hands from the table top to brush it slowly, gently, through Charlotte’s wavy hair, and he sighs as the little girl looks up at him. 

“I feel like I’ve failed her so much in life already, and I’m already fucking this up, too,” he whispers, and Lucy’s heart goes out to him. 

“No, you’re not,” she assures him as she stands gracefully from the floor. “Parenting is a … steep learning curve, and most of my students' parents already have five years of practice under their belt before their kiddos reach me. You’re just… you’re starting out a little bit behind, but you’ll catch up.”

Tim nods and sighs, and then turns back to Lucy as she sits down at the table once more. 

“Speaking of catching up… she’s probably going to be pretty far behind. I got her records from her previous school. Isabel — her mother — pulled her out mid September. She only went to Kindergarten for about a month.”

Lucy wants to ask why the teachers at Charlotte’s previous school had never hotlined. She wants to ask how in the hell no one noticed that the little girl was living with a mother addicted to heroin… but she doesn’t. 

It’s not her place, and besides, Charlotte is safe now. 

She can’t help but think that her mother overdosing was the best thing that could have happened to the little girl, and she smiles softly as she watches Charlotte cuddle further into her father, her eyes blinking sleepily as he wraps an arm around her and holds her close. 

“Don’t worry about that,” she finally says, voice soft, because teaching Charlotte letters and numbers and days of the week doesn’t seem nearly as important as teaching her that she’s loved. “She’ll catch up in time, and we’ll help.”

Lucy smiles at Tim and then at Charlotte, and she knows that teachers aren’t supposed to have favorites, but she has a strong feeling that this little girl with her big blue eyes and her beautiful brown ringlets is going to be one of the students that she never forgets. 

“Want to see the classroom?” she asks, and as she glances at the clock and realizes it’s nearly five in the evening, she knows that she should probably be itching to go home, to relax with a glass of wine and maybe a nice, hot bath. But instead all she wants to do is go straight back to her classroom and make sure that Charlotte has a nametag and a desk and anything else that she could possibly need for Monday.  “I can also get you a list of the supplies she’ll need. It’s not much, just a backpack, supply box, and a few basic things like safety scissors and glue, but that way you have all weekend to go shopping.”

Tim nods and he looks much more relaxed than he had when Lucy had first seen him. 

“Yeah, we’d like that, wouldn’t we?” he murmurs, and he glances down at where Charlotte is cuddled against his chest. “Want to see your classroom, baby?”

Charlotte nods and Tim stands, leaning to set her on the ground, but Charlotte makes a noise and shakes her head, clinging onto his shirt. Tim smiles sadly as he scoops her back up, and Charlotte calms as soon as she’s sitting on Tim’s hip, her head lolling onto his shoulder.

Lucy’s heart clenches as she watches them. 

“Lead the way,” Tim says, motioning for Lucy to walk  out of the office ahead of him, and Lucy does, leading them slowly through the dark hallways of the building. 

She walks backwards so she can see Tim and Charlotte, and smiles as she watches them take in the bright, primary colors all over the walls, the chaotic kindergarten artwork, and the proud displays of letters and numbers lining the hallways outside of the classrooms. 

“Welcome to Sunshine Elementary, Charlotte.”

Chapter Text

“Open your heart. Someone will come. Someone will come for you. But first you must open your heart.”

Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Tim holds Charlotte on his hip as Lucy guides them to her classroom, and as he follows her, he can’t help but marvel at how pretty she is. 

He’s always had a bit of a type (blonde, slim), and Lucy is nothing like anyone he’s dated in the past, but she’s stunning. Her long, wavy brown hair falls in soft ringlets across her shoulders, and her bright, brown eyes shine with happiness and love for her job. It’s clear, as she opens the door and ushers them inside the classroom, that her class is as bright and loving as her personality, and Tim hears Charlotte give a happy little sigh as Lucy flips the lights on. 

Her classroom is rainbow themed, with a table of each color surrounded by tiny, little chairs. There are bookshelves along one entire wall, each one filled with crates of books and individual book boxes for each child. There are lanterns with multi-colored confetti above each table with the team number, and a big, polka dot carpet in front of the SMARTboard. There are bean bags and pillows and chairs all over the room for the children to sit in, and each of the six windows has a gauzy, flowing curtain over it, one for each color of the rainbow. 

The walls are white, which only makes the color pop more, and Tim and Charlotte let their eyes wander over the student work covering the bulletin boards, as well as the carefully constructed anchor charts with ABCs, 123s, and various songs posted all over the room. 

“Welcome to our classroom,” Lucy says softly, and Tim puts Charlotte down on the floor as he walks over to what looks like a reading table. There are six stools surrounding the table, impossibly tiny, and a teacher’s chair. It’s in the shape of a half circle, and Tim can already imagine Charlotte sitting at the table with her friends, Lucy teaching them letters and words. 

“It’s beautiful,” Tim murmurs, and Lucy blushes but smiles widely. 

“Thank you. I don’t have everything ready for Charlotte yet, of course, but she’ll sit over here,” Lucy says, and she walks to the purple table where there’s an empty spot. Each table is split into four squares, and Tim pulls out the teeny, tiny kindergarten chair and encourages Charlotte to sit down in it. “The little girl next to her, Leeia, is a sweetheart. She’ll help Charlotte settle right in and show her how we do things.”

“OK,” Tim says, because he doesn’t know what else to say. “Um, do you need my phone number? To contact me?”

Lucy shakes her head. “No, we use an app called Seesaw for parent communication. I can help you download it and get it set up?”

Tim nods and hands over his phone after unlocking it, and Lucy smiles as she navigates to the app store and quickly finds and downloads the app.

“I send pictures of the kids all the time. We do a lot of fun activities and crafts, and I like to show parents what we’re doing each day. I can send whole class messages, but I can also send individual messages if I need to contact you directly about something.”

“Can… um, can I message you, too?” Tim asks, because he’s already nervous about dropping Charlotte off and it’s still days away. 

“Of course,” Lucy reassures him, and she uses a QR code from one of the binders behind her desk to log Tim into their classroom account. “Here, I’ve set it up for you. Let me…”

She grabs her own phone and types out a message, and Tim smiles softly as a notification pops up on his phone. 

You have a new message from Ms. Lucy! 

He opens it and smiles at the string of emojis she’s sent, and then turns to see that Charlotte has stood up from her chair and is standing in front of a bookshelf full of stuffed animals. 

Lucy walks over and sits beside her. 

“Those are our Emotion Animals. Each one stands for an emotion we could be feeling. This is Happy Hippo,” she says, and she plucks a widely smiling stuffed Hippo off of the shelf. “And this is Shy Squirrel, Angry Aardvark, Sad Shark, and all of the others. Sometimes when we’re having big feelings, it’s hard to talk about them. We can pick the animal that feels the same as we do and sit in the Calming Corner over here until we feel ready to talk.”

The calming corner, Tim sees, is a small space in the corner that’s away from prying eyes, with a beanbag and a little crate of toys, timers, and fidgets. He watches as Charlotte reaches for one of the animals, and Lucy makes a noise as Charlotte hugs it tightly to her chest. 

“That’s the Anxious Alligator. Are you anxious, Charlotte? Anxious means scared and worried.”

Charlotte nods as she moves to sit in the beanbag in the calming corner. Tim follows her and kneels down beside her, brushing a lock of hair out of her eyes. 

“Are you anxious about starting school?” he asks, and Charlotte nods. “I am, too,” he admits, and Charlotte looks up sharply. Tim smiles and sits down on the floor next to Lucy. “I have loved spending time with you this past week, and I don’t want to be away from you, but I know it’s important that you go to school and learn.”

Charlotte just continues to stare at him with wide blue eyes, and Tim sighs as he turns to look at Lucy.

“Ms. Lucy will take good care of you,” he promises, and Lucy nods from beside him. 

“I promise we’re going to have so much fun, Charlotte,” she murmurs, and Charlotte nods, although she still looks worried. She hands the Anxious Alligator back to Lucy, though, and takes Tim’s hand when he holds it out. 

“It was really nice to meet you,” Tim says, and Lucy smiles as she stands up. 

“It was nice to meet you, too,” she says, and she holds out a hand to shake Tim’s. He wraps his fingers around hers, and holds on for longer than he probably should. 

“We’ll see you Monday, then,” he says, and Lucy nods, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear as she walks them toward the door.

Tim lifts Charlotte back into his arms, and holds her close as Lucy walks with them to the parking lot. She waves and smiles as she climbs into her own car, and Tim waves back, watching until she’s pulled out of the parking lot before opening the back door of his truck and buckling Charlotte into her carseat. 

He has a  feeling that Lucy is going to be really, really good for Charlotte. 

____________________

They get McDonalds for dinner on the way home, and once they’re settled into the apartment, Tim helps Charlotte take a bath and change into pajamas. He takes her little hand and leads her into her new bedroom, and flips on the nightlight before he tucks her into bed. 

Tonight Charlotte tangles her fingers in the material of his shirt and doesn’t want to let go, and Tim’s heart aches as he remembers the hug she gave him earlier. 

He hasn’t hugged her much because he knows he’s a stranger to her, but what if she had been wanting a hug but just hadn’t been able to ask for it?

He still feels like he’s fucking everything up. 

“Want me to hold you?” he asks, because now that he knows he can fix what he’s doing wrong. 

Charlotte nods enthusiastically and then climbs into his lap, her little feet and elbows digging into Tim’s thighs and stomach, but once she’s settled she breathes out a sigh of happiness and her little eyes blink sleepily. She sticks her thumb in her mouth and points to the little bookshelf Tim has next to her bed, and he smiles as he reaches for one of the books. 

“Want to hear a bedtime story?”

Charlotte nods again, and Tim pulls The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane from the shelf, opening it to the first page and settling back against the headboard of Charlotte’s new, white bed. He pulls her pink, fluffy quilt over their laps, and cradles her gently as he begins to read. 

“Once, in a house on Egypt Street, there lived a rabbit who was made almost entirely of china. He had china arms and china legs, china paws and a china head, a china torso and a china nose. His arms and legs were jointed and joined by wire so that his china elbows and china knees could be bent, giving him much freedom of movement… ”

Charlotte falls asleep before he even finishes the first chapter, and Tim holds her for a long time, just breathing in the scent of her baby shampoo and rocking her back and forth. 

Why hadn’t Isabel told him?

He would have come home. 

He would have come back to take care of them both in a heartbeat, to be there for Isabel while she was pregnant. 

And maybe… maybe he could have kept her from getting hooked on the drugs. Maybe he could have prevented all of this, if he had been there. He could have stopped what happened, and Charlotte would have been born healthy, loved, and she would have thrived.

Now she is traumatized, behind on her milestones, and mute. He’s sure there will be more issues, because she was born fucking addicted to heroin, and he would give anything, he thinks, to take away all of her suffering. 

She deserves to be taken care of and cherished and hugged and loved. She deserves more than the filthy, condemned house she’d been taken from. More than the needles on the floor, the empty fridge, and the cold air seeping in from the broken windows. She deserves more than a bare mattress on the floor, a box of dirty clothes in the corner, and the filthy, worn stuffed bunny she’d come with. 

Tim buries his head in her hair and breathes in raggedly. 

He’d gone to her house the week before to gather what he could, and had walked away empty handed, his heart full of sorrow and pain, because there had been nothing salvageable in the entire house. 

“I promise I’ll be good to you,” he whispers to his sleeping baby girl, and he watches her chest rise and fall as she sleeps peacefully, warm and comfortable. “I’ll keep you safe and take care of you, I promise.”

Tim sleeps in the tiny, twin bed with her that night because he can’t bear to leave her, and when Charlotte wakes up in the morning she’s smiling, and Tim is so in love with her. 

Chapter Text

“But answer me this: how can a story end happily if there is no love?”

 Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Lucy is curled into a corner of her couch, still in her pajamas while sipping a glass of wine at 6pm on Sunday when her phone dings with a message. She grabs it and finds herself smiling when she sees a Seesaw alert from Tim Bradford in her notifications. 

Tim: Help. Why are there so many types of glue? Does she need a certain kind???

Lucy laughs softly in the dim light of her living room and opens Seesaw before responding. 

Lucy: Honestly stick glue is the best, they can’t make as much of a mess with it as liquid glue. And not the scented kind. Why are we teaching kids to sniff glue? It seems counter productive. 

Tim: OK I can do that. … wait, why do they need ten glue sticks?

Lucy bites her lip to contain her grin as she stares at the message. 

Normally she’s a little annoyed when parents message her on the weekend, but she has a bit of a soft spot for Tim. It probably helps that he’s hot-like-woah and sweet with his little girl. 

She can’t imagine how he feels, finding out after six years in the military that he has a daughter who suffered so much at the hands of her mother, and she’ll do anything, she thinks, to help Tim and Charlotte. 

Lucy: I swear we go through it all. I don’t know where it goes. I don’t know if they eat it while I’m not looking or what, but by March we’ll be down to almost nothing. 

Tim: Can I buy extra to donate to the classroom, then?

Lucy sighs and she knows she’s fucked. 

He’s single, hot, and an amazing dad. 

She’d told herself she’d  never fall for a parent of one of her students, but… well, none of them had been Tim Bradford. 

Lucy: That would be amazing, thank you. You can never have enough glue sticks or baby wipes when teaching Kindergarten, and those two things are probably related now that I think about it. 

Her phone stays silent for half an hour, and then a single image comes through on the Seesaw app. It’s a picture of Charlotte sitting cross-legged in a Walmart cart, dressed in tiny, adorable jean overalls and a pink, long sleeved t-shirt, her curls wild and her smile huge as she holds up a reusable shopping bag full of glue sticks. Beside her in the cart is a bulk box of baby wipes, the gentle-on-skin aloe kind, and Lucy feels her cheeks flush and her heart race.

Lucy: You’re officially my favorite parent. 

Tim: I want to help however I can. I’ve missed out on so much of her life already, and I want to be involved and present. Let me know if you need anything else for the class, I’d be happy to get anything she needs. 

Lucy: Thank you. Are you going to walk her in tomorrow? I’d like to thank you in person. 

Tim: Yeah, I’d love to walk her in. I’ll see you in the morning, Lucy. 

Lucy stares at his message for a long time, and the way he’d written her name makes her stomach clench. She’s full of butterflies, which is stupid, because a lot of people call her Lucy and not Ms. Chen. It’s not special that Tim has called her Lucy, and she shakes her head to rid herself of the ridiculous notion. 

Lucy: See you then. 

She locks her phone and tries (and fails) not to smile as she thinks about Charlotte and her daddy. 

________________

The next morning Lucy is busy walking around the classroom and monitoring her students as they come in, helping them hang up their backpacks, make their lunch choices, and settle into a morning work choice, and she doesn’t notice Tim and Charlotte standing awkwardly in the door for several minutes. 

As soon as she does, though, she smiles widely and walks over to them, her hands clasped behind her back. The noise from the other students behind her fades to a quiet buzz as she greets them. 

“Hi,” she says, and she knows she’s grinning like an idiot, but she can’t help it. 

Charlotte is dressed in a bright yellow dress today, black leggings under them and little black boots on her feet. She’s adorable and smiling, and Lucy is happy to see she’s less anxious than she’d been on Friday.

Tim holds out the reusable shopping bag full of glue and Lucy takes it. 

“Thank you again, I swear there’s a secret dimension that glue and crayons disappear into, but this should see us through the year.”

“The wipes are here, too,” Tim says, and he holds up the box with his other hand. Lucy takes it and stores it with the glue in the closet by the door, and then turns back to father and daughter. She’s just opening her mouth to say something else when the bell rings, and Tim swallows when he realizes that he’s going to have to leave. 

Lucy can tell that Tim is anxious about leaving, so she smiles and puts a comforting hand on his arm before nodding toward the giant, polka dot carpet in the front of the room.

“Do you want to stay for circle time? Charlotte might like that,” she suggests, and Tim deflates, a thankful smile taking over his face. He reaches out to take Charlotte’s hand in his, and helps her hang her backpack up before walking her over to the carpet. 

He feels like a giant in a room full of the teeny, tiny kindergarteners, but as uncomfortable as he feels, he knows Charlotte is a hundred times more nervous than he is. 

So, he sucks it up and sits criss cross on the carpet when Lucy claps to get the class’s attention. 

Tim stares in astonishment when 25 kids clap back the exact same pattern as Lucy and then fall completely and utterly silent. 

Is she magic?

“Good morning, friends!” she says, and her tone has shifted. It’s sweet and soft, and Tim finds himself just as enthralled as the children with the cadence of her voice. “Join me on the rug while we sing our Good Morning song! Be sitting criss-cross on your dot when we’re finished, please!”

Out of nowhere music starts playing, and it takes Tim a moment to see the Alexa device in the corner. Lucy’s controlling it with her phone, and he just barely has time to look back before she starts singing and holy fucking shit, her voice is beautiful. 

“Good morning!” she sings, and Tim feels a huge smile spreading over his lips as all 25 little voices chorus back to her, “Good morning!”

“How are you?” Lucy asks, sing-song, and she’s walking to the carpet as the children begin pushing in their chairs and putting their supplies away.

“How are you?” they ask, and Charlotte turns to look at Tim, grinning around her thumb in her mouth. 

“It’s so nice to have you here with me today!”

Little feet begin walking quickly toward the carpet, and they must have assigned spots, Tim realizes, because they start sitting down on the different colored dots, their feet tucked under them and their little hands in their laps. 

Tim notices that the children all get to the carpet long before the song is over, but they continue singing anyway. 

“Good morning!”

“Good morning!”

“How are you?”

“Just fine!”

“Howdy, how do you do? Hello! Good day!” Lucy sings, and she looks over at Tim and winks as she settles into the fluffy rocking chair at the front of the carpet. “Now that we’re together, learning’s so much fun. The more of us the better, so come on everyone!”

They kids are all grinning and giggling as they repeat the song once more, and by the time the music cuts off, Tim wants to go back to kindergarten, too. 

He’s also noticed that Charlotte has slowly inched off of his lap and is sitting on a bright pink polka dot, and his heart aches as he realizes that she’s going to be fine. 

She’s going to be fine here with Lucy.

“Good morning, friends!” Lucy says, and the kids all chorus the greeting back at her. She’s leaning forward in the rocking chair, and all of the kids are leaning in toward her. 

Tim is a little bit, too. 

“We have a new friend with us today. Her name is Charlotte. Her daddy is here because she’s nervous, but I know you all are going to do an amazing job making Charlotte feel welcome and loved and like a part of our class family. Let’s give Charlotte our New Friend Greeting.”

All of the kids turn in their spots, and they smile and wave. Lucy begins the New Friend Greeting, but the kids clearly know it well, and they say it along with her. 

“Charlotte is here today!
Charlotte is here today!
Let’s all clap our hands and say
Hip, hip, hooray!”

Charlotte giggles and waves back at them before turning to make sure Tim is still behind her. He is, and he waves, too, before turning to smile at Lucy. 

She winks at him and then turns her attention back to the children. 

“It’s Monday, so we’re going to start the day talking about our weekends. Who wants to begin?”

A little girl with blonde hair and bright green eyes raises her hands, and before Tim knows what’s happening, Lucy is tossing her a giant, stuffed turtle. 

“Remember,” Lucy says, and Tim has a feeling she’s saying it more for Charlotte’s benefit, because the rest of her students seem to know the routine very well, “You can’t talk unless you have the Talking Turtle. We take turns and are respectful of the stories our friends want to share.”

The children all nod and then turn toward the girl holding the turtle. 

“I gots to see my Grandma this weekend!” she says, and then she passes the turtle to the boy next to her. 

“My dog died,” he whispers, and Lucy makes a sad noise.

“I’m sorry to hear that, Kaiden. What was your dog’s name?”

Kaiden sniffles and shuffles around on his carpet spot as he hugs the Talking Turtle tightly. 

“His name was Benny.”

“Thank you for sharing, Kaiden. Sometimes if we talk about something sad and share it with others, it becomes easier to handle. Our friends can help us share the sadness.”

Kaiden nods and passes the Talking Turtle to the next child. It goes around the circle slowly, with each child sharing something from their weekend, until it gets to Charlotte. She holds the turtle in her hands (it’s almost as big as she is) and turns to look at Tim with fear and apprehension in her eyes. 

He’s about to jump in when Lucy does, and he finds himself staring at her as she comforts his child. 

“You don’t have to share if you don’t want to, Charlotte. It’s always a choice. So, if you don’t want to share today, you can pass the Turtle to Jake and we can try again tomorrow.”

Charlotte nods and shoves the turtle into the arms of the boy next to her, and Tim thinks for a moment that she’s going to crawl back into his lap. He sees her take a deep breath as she stares at him, though, and then she turns around and joins the circle again, and Tim’s chest is tight with how proud of her he is. 

The circle finishes and then Lucy takes the turtle into her arms and hugs it as she gives Charlotte and then Tim a soft look. 

“Thank you for sharing, everyone. Let’s get ready for calendar time. Find your partners! Charlotte, love, you’ll be partners with Emalee. Emalee, you can move to the dot next to Charlotte and be her partner, OK?”

A little girl with bright red hair and striking blue eyes nods and jumps up from her green dot to relocate to the purple one next to Charlotte, and Tim stands, taking a few steps backward toward the door. 

He doesn’t leave yet (and Charlotte keeps turning around to make sure he’s still there), but he does lean against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest as they go through the days of the week, the weather, and what day of school it is. They review shapes and numbers and ABCs, and Tim is in awe of all that the little children know and can do. 

There’s a point when the children return to their tables to work on an ABC coloring page where Charlotte doesn’t even turn to check in with Tim, and he knows it’s time to go. 

Lucy looks up at him and smiles before walking over and putting her hand on his arm. 

“Say goodbye before you leave,” she whispers, and Tim swallows around the lump in his throat before nodding. He walks over and kneels on the floor beside Charlotte’s table, and reaches a hand out to place it gently on her back. 

“Hey, baby girl,” he whispers, and she turns to him with a bright smile. She’s already coloring her paper a mix of pink and purple, and Tim knows she’s going to be fine. “Daddy has to go now. Will you be OK with Ms. Lucy?”

Charlotte looks apprehensive still, but she nods and then throws herself into Tim’s arms. 

She kisses his cheek and then pulls back, and Tim loves her so much. He hadn’t known that it was possible to love anyone this much, and his chest aches with it. 

“I’ll pick you up after school,” he says, and Charlotte nods before turning back to her coloring page. 

Tim stands and walks back over to Lucy. 

“I promise she’s in good hands,” she whispers, and though leaving is the hardest thing he’s ever done, he finds it’s easier because he’s leaving his baby girl with Lucy.

“Thank you,” he whispers, and he reaches out to squeeze her hand before dropping it and heading toward the door. “See you at pick up.”

Lucy nods and waves, and Tim gives her and Charlotte one last, long look before walking out of the classroom.

Chapter Text

“But let's not speak of what might have been. Let us speak instead of what is. You are whole.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Like most days, Lucy is exhausted by the time the children all have their backpacks on and are lined up at the door to go home. Teaching kindergarten is a whole other level of tired she hadn’t previously known existed. 

It's a bone-weary tired, but it feels good, most days. 

Today is a good day. 

Charlotte hadn’t spoken, but she’d smiled and laughed and participated in everything they’d done. She’d played in the sand pit at recess, and she’d built a tower out of shapes during math time. She’d cradled the dolls during centers carefully, lovingly, and Lucy had loved watching her slowly bloom throughout the day. 

She is… desperately behind, Lucy has discovered, but she’s a hard worker and one of the sweetest children that Lucy has ever met. 

“Have a good night. I love you and I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says, and she smiles and hugs each of her children who ride the bus as she sends them off. Her car pick-up children stay with her, and she can see Charlotte already searching for her daddy in the crowd of parents waiting for their children outside of the front doors.

Lucy smiles and greets the parents she knows, handing off their kids to them and making sure to tell each one that she loves them before they leave, and before she knows it, all of her children are gone except for Charlotte, who now has her thumb in her mouth and is slowly curling into herself as she sits along the front wall of the school building. 

Lucy walks over and sits beside her, and she’s just opening her mouth to say something comforting when Charlotte crawls into her lap. Lucy sighs, wrapping her arms around the little girl and holding her close. 

She normally tries to keep some boundaries between herself and her students. She hugs them and holds their hands and plays with them, but she doesn’t like encouraging them to sit in her lap. 

But there’s a time and a place to break her own rules, and this is it. Charlotte is it. If she wants to be held and comforted, Lucy is sure as hell going to do it, because she has a horrible, aching feeling that she’s not been held or loved much in her short life. 

Charlotte’s eyes watch as cars pass in front of the school building, and she seems to grow more and more sad with each one that isn’t her daddy’s car. 

Lucy knows that Tim will come, that he’s probably just stuck in traffic or that he misheard their dismissal time or something similar. It’s his first day picking Charlotte up, and most parents are either late or over an hour early on the first day. Charlotte, however, doesn’t know this, and she’s been abandoned so often in her little life that Lucy knows she’s probably thinking the worst.

“Your daddy is on his way,” she says with conviction, and she doesn’t strictly know that he is, but she knows.

Tim is on his way. 

He’s desperately in love with this little girl, and he will be here.

Charlotte glances up at Lucy, and her eyes are wide and shining with unshed tears. Lucy makes a noise and holds her closer, running a hand up and down her back. 

“I promise, Charlotte. He’s on his way. He’s not going to leave you behind. I know you’ve been left behind before, but your daddy loves you and he’ll never leave you. He may be late, but he will be here.”

She wants to take her phone out to message Tim on Seesaw, but her hands are full of  Charlotte and she doesn’t want to let the little girl go. 

Principal Grey walks out to inspect the car line, and smiles at Lucy when he sees her with a lap full of kindergartener. 

“Did Mr. Bradford forget what time pick up is?” he asks, and Lucy shrugs, forcing a small smile. 

“Maybe. It is his first time, after all.”

Grey nods and sits on the bench next to them, and he doesn’t mention anything about the way Lucy is holding one of her students or how they would normally take a student inside at this time and call their parents. Lucy is lucky, she knows, because there are schools and principals and teachers who refuse to even hug their students, but she will never be one of them. 

They sit and wait, the three of them together, until Tim’s truck screeches into the parking lot. 

Charlotte’s eyes widen and she jumps out of Lucy’s lap, but Lucy grabs her hand and holds on so that she can’t go running across the road. 

“Just a second, Charlotte,” she murmurs, and she watches with a smile as Charlotte bounces up and down on her feet. “He’s coming. We have to be safe and wait right here and not run into the road, OK?”

Charlotte nods and she’s still sucking on her thumb, but as soon as Tim crosses the street and Lucy lets Charlotte go, the little girl is running as fast as her thin, little legs will carry her until she barrels into Tim’s legs, her arms wrapping around and holding on tight. 

Tim makes a distressed noise and leans down, picking her up and settling her on his hip. 

“I am so sorry,” he enthuses as he walks over to Grey and Lucy. He’s cupping the back of Charlotte’s head, running his fingers through her wavy hair as she curls closer to him and lays her head on his shoulder. “I … took a leave of absence from work when I first got Charlotte, but I know Christmas Break starts next week and I needed to extend it, so I went in but my boss is an as- … he doesn’t understand,” Tim says, and Lucy bites her lip to hide her smile as Tim just barely stops himself from cussing. “He wouldn’t let me leave until I had found someone to cover all of my shifts. I finally just walked out. So, you know, now I don’t have a job. But I didn’t… I was freaking out with every minute that passed because I was late, and―”

Lucy cuts him off, because she has a feeling that he’ll just keep going if she doesn’t.

“It’s fine, Mr. Bradford.”

“Tim, please.”

Lucy blushes and looks down at her feet for a moment before letting her eyes travel a path up Tim’s body to meet his gaze.

“Tim. It’s fine. You weren’t that late. Charlotte got a little worried, but we knew you were on your way.”

“OK,” Tim says, but Lucy can see the way he still looks guilty. 

He had quit his job to be here in time to pick up his daughter, and Lucy thinks that alone shows his devotion, and she says so. 

Tim chuckles and nods and looks a little lighter.

“I guess you’re right. I’ll have to look for a new one, but this time I’ll try and find one with better hours.”

“It’s hard, right out of the military,” Grey cuts in, and Tim turns to the principal, eyebrow raised. 

“Sir, were you…?”

Grey nods and smiles as he watches Tim rock Charlotte back and forth in his arms.

“Three tours. Got out right when my baby girl was born. She’s in sixth grade now, so it’s been a while, but those first few months… it’s an adjustment.”

“It really is,” Tim murmurs, and he hates that he’s now jobless with a five-year-old, but there’s not much he can do about it. “They don’t warn you that it’s really, really hard to find a job you’re qualified for after being in the military since you were 18. I don’t have any college education or formal training, so… anyway, sorry. I’ll be on time tomorrow, I swear.”

Lucy smiles and clasps her hands behind her back. 

“If you’re ever late again, don’t freak out. I’ll wait with her. Just text me on Seesaw.”

Tim nods and then asks, “How did she do today?”

Lucy wants to invite him in and show him the paintings and the drawings that Charlotte had done, but she doesn’t know if he’s in a hurry or not. 

He doesn't seem to be… and he had just quit his job, so… 

“Would you like to see?” she asks, and Tim’s eyes light up as he smiles. 

“I’d love to.”

Grey gives them both fond, knowing looks, and holds the door open for them as they walk back into the building. Charlotte is still clinging tightly to Tim, but she’s sitting up in his arms a little more, eyes bright and alert, and once they reach the classroom she wiggles to be put down. Tim sets her on the floor and she takes his hand, hauling him over to her seat. 

She points, and Tim stares at the mess of colors on the paper drying on her desk. 

“It’s beautiful,” he says, because while he doesn’t know what it’s supposed to be, it’s very colorful.

Lucy chuckles and takes pity on him. 

“We were finger painting our favorite animals today. Finger painting is a good exercise for fine motor control.”

Which she has serious concern about, she thinks, but she doesn’t say anything yet. She wants to finish assessing Charlotte and then ask Tim for a meeting, because he knows she’s behind but she’s not sure he knows how far behind she really is. 

She doesn’t think Charlotte has ever been read to by anyone with the exception of Tim, and she knows that no one ever worked with her at home or brought her to daycare or preschool.

Charlotte doesn’t know any of her letters, numbers, or how to count. She doesn’t know her shapes and has some confusion with her colors, and Lucy’s heart had broken over and over again throughout the day as she’d learned of each thing that no one had cared enough about to teach the little girl. 

“And what’s your favorite animal, baby?” Tim asks, and Charlotte shrugs before looking at Lucy. 

Lucy chuckles and kneels down beside them. “We had to play the guessing game, but we figured out that her favorite animal is a dog. A rainbow colored one, apparently.”

Tim nods and runs his fingers over the outline of the dog, and he wonders how irresponsible it would be to get Charlotte a puppy. 

“Show me what else you did today,” he says, and Charlotte brings him over to the centers and puts one of the baby dolls in his hands. Tim cradles the toy carefully, and Lucy’s heart rate spikes as she watches him hold the doll to his chest. 

She wonders what he would have looked like holding baby Charlotte to his chest so gently, and she blushes as she thinks about it. 

“Do you like dolls?”

Charlotte nods and takes a second one, holding it just as carefully, and then smiles at Tim. 

“Christmas is next week and I’m at a loss as for what to buy her,” Tim admits to Lucy, and Lucy smiles widely. 

“I can actually help with that,” she says, and Tim stands with the doll in his arms still, and Lucy is going to start on fire if he doesn’t put it down soon. Watching him with Charlotte is hot enough, but imagining him cradling a baby is just unfair. “I know all of the in toys right now. I can send you some ideas.”

Tim sighs in relief and runs a hand through his hair, grinning bashfully. 

“Thank you. It’s… I’m barely keeping my head above water here. I always wanted to be a dad. I always wanted kids, just… I figured it would happen differently. I’d meet someone I fell in love with, we’d get married, and have a few babies. I never expected this.”

“You’re doing an amazing job, Tim,” Lucy reassures him, and they both watch fondly as Charlotte puts the doll she’s holding into the bassinet. When Tim gives her a disbelieving look she puts her hand on his arm and forces him to meet her eyes. “You are. From what you’ve told me, Charlotte has had a lot of trauma in her life, but she feels safe with you. You’re her safe place. She’s loved and cared for. She has clothes that fit and a safe home. She has a bed and blankets and toys. This may be the first time in her life that she’s had those things, and so what if you don’t know what kind of toys to get her or you’re late for pick up. She’s safe and loved, and the rest will come.”

Tim sighs and stares into her eyes for a long, tense moment, and then he offers her a small smile. 

She doesn’t remove her hand from his arm. 

He doesn’t seem to mind. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, and Lucy nods. 

She wants to do something stupid like kiss him or tell him how hot he looks cradling a baby doll, but thankfully she doesn’t.

And she should probably get out of here before she does.

“Ready to go, Charlotte?” she asks, and the little girl nods, putting the dolls away and reaching for her daddy’s hand. 

They walk to the parking lot together, and Lucy watches as Tim buckles Charlotte into her carseat.

“See you tomorrow, Charlotte!” she says, and the little girl waves through the window as Tim climbs into the front seat. 

“See you tomorrow, Lucy,” he says, softly, and she smiles, wrapping her arms around her chest and waving as they drive off. 

She sighs as they turn a corner, and the bites her lip. 

She might be a little bit in love with this family. 

Chapter Text

“Edward knew what it was like to say over and over again the names of those you had left behind. He knew what it was like to miss someone. And so he listened. And in listening, his heart opened wide and then wider still. 

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Two more days pass and Tim can see Charlotte slowly but surely coming out of her shell. 

And then, of course, it all goes spectaurily to shit. 

When he picks her up on Tuesday (on time, because he’d quit his job in a fit of anxiety about being late), she’s smiling and watching as two other children play a clapping game. She’s sitting far away from them, but her eyes are glued to them as they play, and she seems to be having fun.

On Wednesday, she’s involved in the game, though she’s not singing or playing with anyone else. She’s clapping the motions on her own, from several feet away, and she giggles when she makes mistakes.

Tim loves seeing the way her eyes shine and how she laughs so freely, and he hopes one day that she’ll be able to play with the other children.

On Thursday Charlotte wakes from a nightmare at 3 in the morning and crawls into bed with Tim, and he holds her as she cries. She doesn’t speak, but she makes little noises that Tim thinks are supposed to mean mommy, and he’s angry because Isabel doesn’t deserve to be missed so fiercely by this precious little girl.

Tim’s alarm goes off at 6am, and he looks down to see Charlotte fast asleep, her little fingers clasped tightly in his shirt, and he wonders if it’s irresponsible to keep her out of school on her fourth day. 

It probably is, he decides, and sighs heavily as he wakes her up. 

It turns out, Charlotte is in a mood.

She’s grumpy and surly as he dresses her in impossibly small jeans and a sweater with a unicorn on it. She pouts the entire time he brushes her hair and pulls it back into a hair tie before braiding it. She refuses to eat her breakfast and throws her spoon across the kitchen.

And she outright screams when he tries to put her in the truck. 

He’s at a loss. 

He’s tired and frustrated and worried about his little girl, and he’s on the edge of tears himself because who can he call? 

Who can help him?

Lucy.

Her name comes to mind first, and a quick glance at his watch tells Tim that she’s probably already at school. 

He texts her on Seesaw while Charlotte screams and writhes in the carseat and refuses to let him buckle her in. 

Tim: I need help.

Her response is almost immediate, and Tim wonders if she’d already been on her computer working on lesson plans or something. 

Lucy: What’s wrong?

Tim: Charlotte is having a full on, screaming, hitting meltdown. I don’t know what to do. Do I let her skip school?

Lucy’s response is just a phone number, and Tim’s heart beats fast in his chest as he dials. 

“Hey,” comes her soft voice over the speaker, and Charlotte is still raising hell, but she pauses just long enough in her screaming to hear Lucy’s voice. Her cries stutter and her sobs soften, and Tim puts Lucy on speaker phone out of self preservation. 

“Hi. We’re having a hard time getting in the truck for school,” he says, and he reaches out to brush his hand over Charlotte’s hair. She’s thrown such a fit that some of her curls have come loose from the braid and are wild and free, hanging in her face. 

“Hey, Tim. Hi, Charlotte.”

Charlotte makes a noise and sticks her thumb in her mouth, and now that she’s not screaming so loudly that it hurts his eardrums, Tim feels his heart aching because Charlotte is so little, and she’s dealing with such big emotions. 

She’d dreamed about her mother, and she isn’t talking yet so she can’t just talk about it. She’s doing incredible, all things considered, and honestly Tim is shocked she hasn’t had a meltdown before this. 

“Are you coming to school today, Charlotte?” Lucy asks, and Charlotte shakes her head, letting out a scream from around her fingers. “We’re doing lots of fun things today. We’re going to read a book about snowmen and then make our own. Then, we’re going to paint some more. You have Art class today, too, for specials, and I know you love art.”

Charlotte’s cries have tapered down to almost nothing as she listens to Lucy. 

“She had a nightmare around 3 in the morning,” Tim explains, and he’s leaning against the side of the truck now, tired and spent. “Neither of us slept well. I thought about keeping her home today…”

“But routine is good,” Lucy finishes for him. “She needs to come to school.”

“I know,” Tim says, and he takes in a deep breath as he reaches for Charlotte’s carseat buckle again. She whimpers but lets him buckle her in, and he lets out a sigh as he climbs into the front seat. Once he turns the truck on, Lucy’s voice comes out of the car speaker, washing over and calming them both. 

“Tim, I was going to ask to set up a meeting after Christmas Break to talk about Charlotte and how we can best help her… but it might be beneficial to meet sooner rather than later. I’d like to refer Charlotte to our in school counselor, at the very least, and that can take a while so I’d like to get the ball rolling.”

Tim sighs, and he’d known this was coming because he knows that Charlotte is behind. And he wants to do everything he can to help her, but he’s drowning, and he doesn’t know how he’s going to do all of this.

How is he going to juggle an emotionally fragile little girl, who is also behind in her academics, and has several medical diagnoses that had been dropped off on his doorstep the day before?

“Yeah, actually, that would be good. I got more information from DFS. We… we finally got Charlotte’s medical file, and it’s not complete, but it’s … a lot. I set up an appointment with a pediatrician to get her caught up on shots and get a more up to date look at what’s going on, but you should know… what we’re working with.”

“OK,” Lucy agrees easily, and then suggests, “What about today after school? I’m free. You can just come inside after picking Charlotte up and we can talk.”

Tim agrees, and then glances into the backseat where Charlotte is blinking sleepily at him. 

“It’s not fair,” he whispers, and it’s not. 

He’s memorized Charlotte’s list of diagnoses, and it breaks his heart every time he thinks about it. It breaks his heart even further when he considers the fact that nothing has been updated in the two years since Isabel had lost and then re-gained custody of Charlotte (for the third time). 

She’d never once been to the doctor while with Isabel. She’d gone to see several specialists and therapists while in Foster Care, but once Isabel had gotten her back, everything had stopped. 

But what he does know… it’s hard to swallow. 

Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome
PTSD
ADD/ADHD
Autism Spectrum, Level 1
Significant Developmental Delays

It’s so fucking unfair. 

If he’d been there, if he’d known … most if not all of this could have been prevented, and he hates that Charlotte is going to suffer her entire life because of Isabel’s shitty choices. 

“Tim?”

Tim takes in a deep, shaking breath, and grips the steering wheel more tightly. 

“Yeah, I’m here. We’re almost at school. Can I walk her in?”

“Of course. I’m sure she’d love that.”

Tim nods and turns into Sunshine Elementary’s parking lot, pulling into a spot and turning the truck off before picking up his phone and pressing it to his ear. 

“Thank you, Lucy. I didn’t… I didn’t know who else to call, when she was freaking out. And your voice really helped calm her down. I felt like I was going to lose it when she wouldn’t stop screaming. Just… thank you.”

“Any time, Tim. Keep my number, in case you need me again,” Lucy says, and Tim smiles as he quickly adds her to his contacts list. 

Lucy Chen, he writes, and then in a fit of insanity, adds ☀️ after her name. 

He’s never used an emoji in his life, but Lucy is like the sun and it just seems to fit. 

“Keep mine, too,” he says, and then they hang up as he unbuckles Charlotte and picks her up. He settles her on his hip and watches with his heart in her throat as she takes in the fact that they’re at school. 

He’s worried for a minute that she’s going to start screaming again, but she doesn’t. She just sticks her fingers in her mouth and sucks on them quietly as Tim walks them toward the front door. Her eyes are bright with unshed tears, but she doesn’t start screaming or crying as they walk into her classroom, and for that he’s thankful. 

“Hi,” Lucy greets, and Charlotte waves with her free hand but doesn’t look like she’s planning on leaving Tim’s arms anytime soon. “How are you today?”

Charlotte points toward the stuffed animal shelf and Tim walks her over. He sits down with her in front of it, and then kisses her hair as she shuffles through them. 

She grabs and holds up the Sad Shark, and Lucy makes a noise as she sits down next to them. 

They’re the only ones in the room, and Tim feels bad about bursting in before the school day has even technically started. 

“You’re sad today?” she asks, and Charlotte nods as she hugs the Sad Shark to her chest. “Because you had a bad dream?”

Charlotte nods again and then turns to Tim. 

“I think it was about her mom,” he says, and he can’t stop or even try to disguise the look of anger that crosses his face then. 

Lucy picks up on it and smiles sadly at them both. 

“I’m sorry you had a bad dream,” she tells Charlotte, and as she speaks she reaches out to put her hand on Tim’s arm. “And I’m sorry that you’re both having a hard morning.”

Charlotte reaches over and grabs a second stuffed animal, this time the Happy Hippo, and holds it out. Lucy takes it from her, and makes a confused noise. 

“You’re happy, too?”

Charlotte nods and then lays her head on Tim’s chest, and Lucy’s smile then is incandescent. 

“Because you have your daddy?”

Charlotte nods again, and Tim hugs her even closer. Charlotte also points to her desk and then the carpet and the bookshelf and then to Lucy, and Tim smiles as he buries his head in her hair. 

“And you’re happy because of Ms. Lucy and because of school?” he adds, and Charlotte nods. She holds up both animals together and makes a face, and Lucy chuckles. 

“Yes, it’s really hard when you’re feeling a lot of things at the same time. It’s confusing and frustrating and I bet that’s why you were crying and screaming this morning, huh? You’re sad about your mommy, but happy that you’re with your daddy, and it’s all just very confusing, isn’t it?”

Charlotte nods and then sighs deeply as she pulls away from Tim. He sets her cautiously on the ground, straightening her unicorn sweater, and then watches as she brings both stuffed animals to her desk. She takes a seat at the table, and holds both stuffed animals to her, and Tim watches in sadness and uncertainty. 

“What if she has another fit while at school?” he asks, and Lucy turns to  him, her hand still on his arm even as they stand up, and shrugs.

“Then we’ll deal with it. She can use the calming corner, or if it’s disrupting the class, we can have Principal Grey or our counselor come get her and stay with her until she calms down. There’s an aquarium in the sensory room that the kids sometimes like watching when they’re upset. Our students who are on the autism spectrum visit that room a lot, but anyone can use it.”

“Oh,” Tim says, and then, as he stuffs his hands in his pockets. “She is. On the autism spectrum, I mean. It was in her file. Level 1, I guess? I have no idea what that means, though.”

“We have a lot to go over this afternoon, then, don’t we?” Lucy asks, and Tim nods and sighs. 

“It’s so much. I feel like my brain is going to explode.”

“You’re going great. Just keep loving on her,” she suggests, and Tim nods as he runs a hand through his hair. 

“Call me at any point today if you need to,” he says, and Lucy nods. “I have an interview at … I already forgot where, but it’s for private security. But other than that I’m free. I can come get her, or help calm her down, or whatever.”

“I will,” Lucy promises, and then turns her head as the other children begin entering the classroom. Charlotte doesn’t pay attention to them; she just continues to hug the emotion animals tight to her chest and suck her thumb, and Tim hates to leave but he knows he needs to.

“OK. I’ll see you later,” he says, and Lucy nods and moves to greet her other students as Tim walks back over to Charlotte. He leans down and kisses her head, and whispers goodbye in her ear before walking out of the classroom door.

Chapter Text

 "Perhaps," said the man, "you would like to be lost with us. I have found it much more agreeable to be lost in the company of others."

— Kate DiCamillo , The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Tim is in the middle of an interview with the owner of Ascension Protection Services when his phone rings. 

He looks down at it, and he knows that it’s not professional, but he’d spent the morning trying to console his screaming, crying, panicking daughter, so fuck professionalism. If Charlotte needs him, he’ll be there.

Incoming call from: Lucy Chen ☀️

He winces and looks up at the owner of the company he knows he’s not going to get hired at. 

“I’m so sorry, but my daughter had a hard morning this morning. She’s… it’s a long story, but it’s the school calling. Do you mind if I take this?”

The man smiles and shakes his head. “I’ve got a kid, too. He comes first, always. I’ll step out so you can talk.”

Tim smiles shakily and then swipes to answer the call before pressing the phone to his ear. 

“Lucy?”

“Hey, is this a good time? I know you said you had an interview today,” Lucy says, and Tim can hear the noise of the classroom in the background. There’s giggling and talking and the noises of generalized chaos, but above all of that he can hear Charlotte.

She’s crying, and his heart breaks.

“Of course. What’s wrong?”

“We made it through most of the morning OK but then Charlotte started having a rougher time. I warned her it was almost time to go to Art and she’s… feeling a little clingy today. I told her I couldn’t go with her and we started having a little meltdown. I don’t want to have anyone come remove her from the class unless we absolutely have to, so I wanted to see if talking to Daddy would help.”

Tim feels his heart flutter when Lucy calls him daddy, because he is a daddy now. He’s always wanted to be, and this may not be the way he imagined it happening, but he’s Charlotte’s daddy and he is so in love with her. 

“Can I talk to her?”

“Of course. Charlotte, it’s Daddy,” Lucy murmurs, and her voice is soft and sweet and Tim wishes he were there with them. 

“Hey, baby,” he whispers, and Charlotte doesn’t speak, of course she doesn’t, but her sobs taper off a bit as he talks to her. “I’m so proud of you. You’ve made it through half of the day already! Ms. Lucy said that you’re getting ready to go to art. I know you love drawing.”

Charlotte sniffles and Tim can hear Lucy in the background talking to the other children. 

“I loved your dog picture. It’s still hanging on the fridge. Can you make another picture that we can hang up next to it? You’re gonna have so much fun in art, baby, and Ms. Lucy will be there to pick you up right when it’s over. She’s not going anywhere, I promise. And then she’ll be with you the rest of the day until I come to pick you up.”

Charlotte makes a desperate little noise, and Tim wants to leave his interview and sit in the tiny, plastic, uncomfortable chairs right next to Charlotte while she’s in art class. 

But he can’t. 

He knows he can’t. 

She needs to be independent. She needs to go to Art, and then when it’s over and Lucy picks the kids up, she’ll see that Tim told the truth. She needs to learn, in a safe environment, that they won’t abandon her. That if they say they’ll be there then they will. 

“I know you can do it. You’re so strong, Charlotte. You’re my strong girl, and you can do this.”

Lucy’s back moments later, and Tim breathes a sigh of relief when Charlotte doesn’t start screaming as the phone is taken from her. 

“We’re headed to Art now. Thank you, Tim. I hope this helps. I’ll hang around outside the Art Room for a few minutes to see how she does. I want her to go and be independent, but if she’s not ready I’ll pull her out and take her to the sensory room for a bit. There’s no point in causing more trauma if she’s not ready.”

“Thank you,” Tim whispers, and his voice is choked with emotion. “You’re… just, thank you.”

“Of course,” Lucy says, and Tim can imagine the soft smile on her face. “I’ll text you if anything else happens.”

Tim thanks her again and then hangs up. He takes a moment to breathe deeply, composing himself as best he can before he walks to the door and opens it, forcing a smile when the owner, John something, turns back to face him. 

“Sorry, we’re all squared away for now. Um. I have to ask, did I bomb this interview by taking that call? If I did that’s fine, my kid is the most important thing right now. But I don’t want to waste anyone’s time if that’s the case.”

“No, of course not,” John says, and Tim glances at his nametag. John Nolan. “I get it. Kids come first. And that’s something that we value here. The work is important, but family is the priority. My boy, Henry… he’s caused quite a bit of trouble in his day. I’ve had to leave work more than once to go to the school. Your child…?”

“Daughter,” Tim supplies, and he finds that the smile tugging at his lips is real, because this might actually be the perfect job for him. “Charlotte. She’s five.”

He pauses, and then finds himself wanting to explain everything. If this interview goes well, if he gets a job here, then Nolan will need to know. He’ll need to be aware that Tim is basically on call for Charlotte whenever she needs him, and if they can’t accommodate that, then this won’t be a good fit for him. 

“My ex never told me about her. I was in the military for six years, and about a month after I got out… DFS showed up on my doorstep with her. Her mother had overdosed and passed away, so she’s mine now. I had no idea she existed, and suddenly I’m a father to a traumatized little girl. I’m going to need flexibility with hours. If… if that won’t be possible, then I should probably move on.”

“Mr. Bradford… first of all, I’m so sorry to hear about your situation. That must be difficult. But it sounds like Charlotte is in a good place with you. If you need to leave suddenly, barring life or death situations, we should be able to accommodate that.”

“Thank you,” Tim says, his voice low, and he smiles when Nolan nods and leans back in his chair.

“Let’s talk about your military experience.”

__________________

Lucy doesn’t call or text again, so Tim figures that the rest of the day goes smoothly. He arrives over thirty minutes early for pick up in his anxiety, though, and he ends up sitting in the parking lot playing on his phone while he waits. The car line grows by the minute, but Tim stays out of it since he knows he’ll be going inside the building after picking Charlotte up. 

He’s just about to head in a few minutes early when his phone rings over the bluetooth speaker, and he glances at the display and winces. 

DFS Rachel Hall

Tim answers it, and wonders what bad news she has this time. 

“Hello, Tim Bradford speaking,” he says, and he closes his eyes and leans his head back against the headrest of his seat as he speaks. 

Please nothing else bad… 

“Good afternoon, Mr. Bradford,” comes Rachel’s soft voice, and Tim thinks that she’s perfectly suited for a position like she has. She’s kind and soft and sweet, and she knows how to deliver bad news in the most gentle way possible. “We got some more complete medical and psychiatric records on Charlotte. I sent them to your email, but I can also send you a paper copy to your home address if you’d like.”

“No, that’s fine,” Tim says, because he can print them out if he needs to. “Can you give me the highlights? I’m getting ready to have a meeting with her kindergarten teacher, actually, so…”

He trails off and waits for Rachel to respond. There’s the sound of shuffling paper over the speaker, and it’s several moments before she speaks again. 

“You already know about her diagnosis of ASD, Level 1, but this report from the psychologist gives a little more background. They apparently interviewed Isabel, as well, as part of the requirements for her to gain custody of Charlotte back, and there’s… a lot. The most important thing might be that Charlotte has actually never spoken. She’s not physically mute; medically, she’s able to talk just fine. She just… never has.”

Tim feels a single tear slip down his cheek, and he wishes more than anything that he had known.

“OK,” he says, and he hates how his voice cracks. “OK. What else?”

“There was a home visit when Charlotte was taken away three years ago. You saw the condition of the home when you went to see if you could get any of her things, but it was… worse, when Isabel lost custody last time.”

Tim doesn’t think he’s prepared for this. 

He doesn’t know if he’ll ever be prepared for this. 

He asks anyway. 

“Tell me.”

“When DFS did a home visit back in 2019, when Charlotte was 2, she was in a crib and there were bugs and mice crawling all over her. She was wearing only a soiled diaper and had an infected rash. Isabel had been high for over three days and Charlotte had been trapped in the crib the entire time. She was taken away for nine months that time. It was the third and final time she was taken away. She wasn’t returned until Isabel got clean, went to rehab, and got a new house. The one she was in when she died, actually. She was doing well for a while. She had several home visits between the time Charlotte was 3 and 4, and all were good if not stellar. Charlotte had clothes and toys and was fed. Isabel enrolled her in kindergarten. And then… she must have gotten hooked on drugs again.”

Tim presses the heels of his hands into his eyes so hard he sees stars. He’s crying openly now, tears slipping down his cheeks, because his baby girl had been through so much.

She had suffered so much. 

“Why the fuck didn’t you guys check up on her and take her away when Isabel got hooked again? How the hell did Isabel pull her out of kindergarten and no one thought to check up on her? She was with Isabel for four months after she pulled her from school and not a single goddamn person checked on her. Not a single person. How the fuck did that happen?”

Rachel is silent for several moments, and Tin can hear her crying over the phone. She sniffles and sobs softly, and Tim knows it’s not her fault specifically, but how had this happened?

“She’d been taken away three goddamn times. Three times, and they kept giving her back to Isabel. I want to know who was responsible for that and I want to … fuck, I want to hurt them. They gave my baby girl… they have her back to Isabel, over and over again. Why did no one ever call me? Why? I would have come home. I would have come for her.”

He’s sobbing unrestrainedly now, his chest aching and his breath coming in shallow pants. 

He wants to hold Charlotte close, to hug her and run his fingers through her hair and tell her how loved she is. How much he adores her. He wants to tell her that he’ll never let anyone else hurt her again. 

“I don’t know,” Rachel finally says, and Tim knows that he should feel bad that she’s crying, too, but all he can feel is pain. “I don’t know why you were never contacted. We had to do some searching, but it wasn’t that hard to find you. You should have… you should have been contacted. I know it’s not an excuse, but we just got new management. The old… the old management was …”

Tim feels anger well up in him. It settles in his chest and his throat and he feels like he’s going to throw up. “I want their name. I want to know who made the decision to send Charlotte back into that situation.”

“OK,” Rachel says simply, and Tim drops his head onto the steering wheel. “OK. I can see if I can get that for you. I’m sorry, Tim. I’m so sorry.”

“I know,” Tim says, because he knows it’s not her fault. He knows that. “I… I have to go. It’s dismissal time. I have to go.”

Rachel says a soft goodbye and then Tim hangs up the phone. He stares at his reflection in the mirror for a second, but it’s immediately apparent that he’s not going to be able to hide the fact that he’s been crying, but he can’t be late to pick Charlotte up. 

He can’t. 

He can’t let her think that she’s been forgotten again.

Not when she’d been abandoned and left alone so many times in her short life. 

He scrubs his hands over his face anyway, trying to at least dry all of the tears, and then opens the door of his truck before heading inside of the school. 

Chapter Text

 "It was a singular sensation to be held so gently and yet so fiercely, to be stared down at with so much love."

— Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

The second Lucy sees Tim walk up to the pick up line, she can tell that he’s been crying. She has a sinking feeling she knows why , and she has to force a smile as she begins to hand children off to their parents.

Charlotte sees Tim and makes a noise, her hand tugging on Lucy’s, but she’d been expecting this and she holds tight to the little girl. 

“Remember,” she says gently, and she kneels down until she’s face level with Charlotte. The little girl has her fingers in her mouth and her blue eyes are wide and desperate as she glances back and forth between Lucy and Tim. “We can’t run into the street. That’s not safe. We have to wait for daddy to come to us.”

Normally Charlotte is receptive to Lucy’s reminders, but today she’s having none of it. She begins to scream and tries to pull away from Lucy, desperate to get to her daddy, and Lucy’s heart breaks a little as she’s forced to hold her back. She wraps her arms around Charlotte’s tiny waist and holds her as she pushes and screams, and she glances up to see Tim hurrying across the parking lot when he notices Charlotte’s tantrum.

Once he’s past the line of cars and safely on the sidewalk, Lucy lets Charlotte go. The little girl stumbles as she runs, making unintelligible noises around her fingers as she barrels into Tim’s legs. He sweeps her up and cradles her close, his hand cupping the back of her head as he holds her. 

“Hey, baby,” he whispers, and he kisses her head and her cheek and her forehead. “Did you have a good day?”

Charlotte makes a disgruntled noise and buries her head in Tim’s shoulder as Lucy stands up and smiles as she walks closer to Tim. She still has several kindergartners waiting to be picked up, so she stays close to them as she takes in Tim’s tired expression.

“Don’t let Miss Grumpy here fool you. After Art we did much better. She had a good day.”

Charlotte makes another noise and Tim’s heart breaks when he remembers what Rachel had said. 

She’s never spoken.

He wonders how she communicated when she didn’t have adults who listened to her. 

He kisses Charlotte’s hair again and then settles her on his hip more comfortably. She lays her head on his shoulder and sucks on her fingers, and Tim bounces her as he walks closer to Lucy. 

“Are you OK?” she asks, and Tim shakes his head. 

He’s barely holding back another round of tears as he observes all of the other kindergartners. 

They’re talking and laughing and playing together as they wait for their parents to pick them up, and his chest hurts with anger and sadness and jealousy that Charlotte can’t do that. That she can’t talk to her friends, or interact with them in a socially appropriate way. 

“No,” he admits, and then he sighs. “I got more news from Charlotte’s DFS worker. I can fill you in once we’re inside.”

Lucy nods and she reaches out to put a hand on Charlotte’s back, because she knows based on Tim’s expression and the drying tears tracks on his face that it’s not good news.

It takes entirely too long for her kindergarteners to be picked up, and by the time Lucy is loading the last one in their car, Charlotte has fallen asleep on Tim’s shoulder. 

“She really did have a good day, all things considered,” Lucy whispers as she holds the door open for Tim. He walks into the school building ahead of her, and rubs his hand up and down Charlotte’s back idly as they head toward the classroom. “She was emotional and we didn’t get a lot of work done, but she was here and for the most part she was smiling. So that’s something.”

“Yeah,” Tim agrees, and then, “Thank you again, for helping me with her this morning. I was panicking and I didn’t know what to do, and I know that calling me to help calm her down was way outside of your job description. So… thanks.”

Lucy ushers Tim inside of her classroom, closing the door softly behind her. 

“I may be a little bit more attached than I normally allow myself to be,” she admits, and Tim chuckles as he takes a seat at the reading table with Charlotte still in his arms. He rearranges her until she’s sitting on his lap, her head on his chest and her little legs on either side of his lap. 

“She has a way of worming straight into your heart, doesn’t she?” he asks, his voice a low murmur, and Lucy nods as she watches them. 

She and her father have that effect on her, actually, and she’s finding that there isn’t much she wouldn’t do for either of them. 

“So,” Tim begins as Lucy takes a seat in her chair behind the table. She has a stack of assessments and other data she’s already collected during Charlotte’s first four days of school, and she hates to add on to whatever other bad news Tim has received today, but she knows that this is important. 

“Right,” Lucy says, and she sighs, biting her lip as she looks at the stack of paperwork. “I’m sorry, it looks like you’ve had a rough day and I don’t want to pile on top of that.”

Tim sighs and wipes his free hand over his face. 

He’s exhausted and mentally drained. 

It’s been one hit after another after another, and he’s not sure how many more hits he can take. 

“Yeah,” he admits. “It’s been a shitty day. Neither I nor Charlotte slept well last night, so we’re both exhausted, and then… god, Rachel called me and gave me more bad news, and now I know you have bad news for me and it’s just so much, Lucy. I’m drowning here. Charlotte has a lot more issues and needs than I thought she did and it’s just… terrifying. I don’t know how I’m going to do this without fucking everything up.”

Lucy hates that there’s a table between them. She hates that she can’t reach out and comfort Tim but she thinks that it’s probably a good thing. She needs to maintain some professionalism. 

“I’m so sorry,” she says, and she can’t help but reach out and put her hand over Tim’s on the table. He holds on tightly, and he’s a lot closer to breaking down than he looks, she realizes, because he’s holding onto her like a lifeline. 

Screw professionalism. 

Lucy drops Tim’s hand for one brief moment as she walks around the table and takes a seat in the chair next to him. She looks up and meets his gaze, and she can see the exact moment that he breaks. 

“Oh, Tim,” she whispers, and she leans forward, wrapping her arms around him and Charlotte. Tim drops his head to her shoulder and sobs, his chest heaving and his body shaking. 

Lucy doubts very strongly that he’s let himself fall apart in front of another person in… a very long time. Certainly not since he got Charlotte, and she knows that the pain and anger and frustration has only been growing and growing, and she’s glad that he’s letting it out. 

“It’s going to be OK,” she whispers, and she reaches out a hesitant hand to run up and down Tim’s back. He’s warm and solid under her palm, and Lucy finds it’s easier than she thought it would be to let down her own guard a little. She closes her eyes and holds Tim, and whispers comforting words to him as he cries. 

It takes him a very long time for his sobs to subside, and when they do he pulls back with a bashful expression. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are bright with tears, and he clears his throat awkwardly and refuses to meet her eyes.

“Tim,” Lucy says, her voice a whisper, and Tim’s breath catches as she reaches for his hand again. 

Charlotte is still sleeping against his chest, her hair sticking out of her braid haphazardly, and Tim holds onto her like he’s afraid to ever let her go. 

“She’s never spoken,” he whispers, and once the words pass his lips, the dam breaks. 

He tells her everything Rachel had told him, and by the time he’s done, Lucy is crying, too, tears slipping silently down her cheeks. 

They pull up the report that Rachel had sent on Lucy’s computer, and they read it together, holding onto each other’s hands like a lifeline. 

They read about the three times Charlotte had been taken away from Isabel. First when she was born addicted to heroin, and then again when Charlotte was one and was hospitalized for malnutrition and failure to thrive. The third and final time she was taken away was when she was two and found abandoned in her crib, and Tim cries all over again when he reads the psychologist's report. It’s professional and matter-of-fact, but each detail is like a knife to Tim’s heart. 

Charlotte Bradford, 2-years-old. Removed from home due to neglect, malnutrition, and maternal drug use. Her father is not in the picture and never has been according to Isabel Greene. No extended family. 

Tim feels his anger flare again because he was only never in the picture because he didn’t know.

He reads on, and while the entire report tears his heart into pieces, there are snippets from each section that stand out. 

Charlotte has been placed in a group home until a foster home can be found. Her mother has entered into a rehabilitation facility and will regain custody of Charlotte pending her release. 

__

Charlotte has never spoken. 

__

After visiting the doctor, Charlotte has been diagnosed with Failure to Thrive in addition to the previously noted diagnoses. She’s in the 15th percentile for height and the 1st percentile for weight. A dietitian has been consulted to help her gain weight. 

__

Charlotte has not yet formed any attachments to her caregivers. 

__

Isabel Greene has completed the rehabilitation program and has secured housing as well as a stable job. Charlotte Bradford will be returned to her pending a home visit and a repeat psychiatric evaluation.

The entire report is seventeen pages long, and Tim and Lucy read in silence until the very end. 

“They gave her back,” Tim whispers, because he still can’t believe it. “They gave Charlotte back to her after everything she did.”

Lucy sniffles and holds onto Tim’s hand tighter. 

She’s seen some terrible things in her seven years teaching, but Charlotte’s situation is by far the most heartbreaking. 

“It’s no wonder she’s behind,” she whispers. “No one cared enough to take the time to teach her anything. She doesn’t know her letter or numbers or shapes, Tim. She doesn’t even know all of her colors.”

Tim closes his eyes and breathes in through his nose, trying to hold back a fresh wave of tears. 

“What can I do?” he asks. “How can I help her?”

Lucy knows she’s sitting entirely too close to Tim. She knows she’s touching him too much, that she’s letting herself get too involved and too attached, but she can’t help it. 

He and Charlotte have made a home for themselves in her heart, and she’s already committed to helping them in any way she can. 

“Honestly… the best thing you can do for her right now is to request academic testing. She desperately needs an IEP.”

At Tim’s confused look, Lucy elaborates. “An Individualized Education Plan. It’s for special education. With her diagnoses and how far behind she is, she would probably qualify easily. I can’t guarantee anything, of course, but I’d be willing to bet she’d qualify for all of the services we offer. Speech and language therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, counseling, and special services minutes. I can’t… I can’t technically recommend testing, and I could get in trouble for even telling you all of this, but… ”

“I won’t tell anyone,” Tim whispers immediately, and Lucy smiles at him softly. 

“I know,” she says. It occurs to her that she’s still holding Tim’s hand, but she doesn’t want to let go. “We don’t usually test kindergartners. We usually wait until children are in first grade for academic testing, but Charlotte shouldn't even go into first grade next year. She needs to be retained, too, and I don’t recommend that lightly, Tim. She’s young — she has a summer birthday, so that’s another big reason I’d recommend it. But if you, as her parent, request academic testing… the school is legally obligated to test her within 90 days.”

“OK,” Tim whispers, and while he hates the idea that his little girl needs that much help, he’s more than willing to do anything he needs to do to help her get caught up to her peers, or to at least give her a fighting chance. “What do I do?”

Lucy squeezes Tim’s hand and then lets it drop. “After you leave here, email Dr. Grey and just say that you know how far behind Charlotte is and that you’d like to request testing. Attach any medical documents you have, because those will help qualify her.”

Tim nods, and then blows out a breath, because for the first time since Charlotte showed up on his doorstep, he doesn’t feel so alone in this. 

“OK. And what can I do with her over Christmas break to help?”

“I’m going to text you that list of toys I mentioned that I recommend for Christmas,” Lucy says, and she pulls out her phone and pulls up Amazon. She scrolls to a wishlist titled Charlotte Christmas Ideas, and shows Tim some of the toys she’s added to it. “A lot of these are educational and can help her with her letters and numbers. I recommend working with her through games and songs and fun things. There’s a channel on YouTube called Super Simple Songs that has a lot of educational videos. Cocomelon is also great. The kids love it and children on the Autism Spectrum often learn well through music and repetitive games. And…”

Lucy pauses, and Tim rearranges Charlotte in his arms so that he can face her more fully. She’s biting her lip and her cheeks are stained a light red, and Tim looks on curiously. 

“And… I could come to your house and tutor her over break, if you’d like?”

Tim’s immediate response is yes, and he doesn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t invite Lucy over to his house to tutor his little girl.

“That would be amazing,” he murmurs, and Lucy nods, still blushing. 

“Okay,” she whispers, and Tim feels a smile tugging at his lips as he imagines Lucy in his space, in his home, with him and Charlotte. 

“Okay.”

Chapter Text

“Once, oh marvelous once, there was a rabbit who found his way home.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Lucy walks with him to the parking lot after their meeting. Charlotte is still sleeping soundly on Tim’s shoulder, and he briefly worries that she won’t sleep tonight if she naps too much now, but he pushes the thought away because he will not wake her. She’s exhausted and she can use every bit of rest she can get, he’s sure. 

“Oh,” Lucy says, and she’s standing right next to Tim’s truck as he carefully maneuvers Charlotte into her car seat and buckles her in. “Tomorrow is a half day because it’s the day before Christmas Break. I think I sent out a reminder on Seesaw, but it might have been last week so you may not have gotten it.”

Tim vaguely remembers seeing something about it on the school’s website, and besides, he doesn’t currently have a job, so it’s not a big deal.

“That’s fine. What time should I be here?”

Lucy leans against the side of Tim’s truck and smiles at him as he gently closes Charlotte’s door. 

He stares at her, and despite everything bad that’s happened in the past two weeks, she is good, and he’s so grateful he met her when he did. 

“We dismiss at noon. Um… also, tomorrow is our Winter Party. We have snacks and play games and do crafts. It’s basically just a fun day.”

Tim smiles softly, because that sounds wonderful and he thinks Charlotte will really enjoy it. He’s about to tell Lucy so, to tell her that it sounds fun, when she adds, “We could use another parent helper, if you want to come.”

“Oh,” Tim says, and Lucy shrugs as she sticks her hands into the pockets of her dress. 

“Only if you want to. It can be… crazy. It’s basically 25 kindergarteners hyped up on sugar and covered in glue, but…”

“It sounds fun,” Tim assures her quickly, and it does. It sounds chaotic, sure, but he’s loved being in Lucy’s classroom before, so how different could this be? “I’d love to help.”

Lucy smiles brightly and Tim finds himself lost in her. She’s so beautiful and kind. She’s a ray of sunshine and he can’t help but find himself drawn to her. 

“That’s great. OK, so, I’ll see you in the morning?”

Tim nods and waves, and then blushes because is he a teenager? He’s waving dorkily at the girl he may or may not have a bit of a crush on. Oh, god, how has he been reduced to this?

“See you tomorrow, Lucy,” he says softly, and he finds himself staring after her as she walks toward her own car. He watches as she climbs in, waves at him again, and then begins backing out of the parking lot. 

He climbs into his own truck and smiles all of the way home. 

_________________

Charlotte wakes up as he’s carrying her up the stairs to their apartment, and she’s moody for the rest of the night. Nothing like the tantrum she’d thrown in the morning, but she glumly gnaws on her chicken nuggets without really eating any of them, and then screams when Tim asks her to please eat just a little bit more. 

“Charlotte,” he says, and he runs a hand over his weary face. “You gotta eat, baby. Do you want something different?”

Charlotte shakes her head and pushes her food around on her plate, and Tim sighs. 

They just need to go to bed, he decides, and try again in the morning. 

“OK,” he whispers, and he takes her barely touched plate away, dumps the food in the garbage, and then holds his arms out for her. She goes easily, always wanting to be near him, and settles her head on his shoulder as he walks them into the bathroom. He holds her on his lap as he begins running warm water, and she sighs happily when he dumps in a cupful of the lavender bubble bath she loves so much. 

He loves smelling her hair after she takes a bath. She smells soft and clean and she still has that baby scent that people go on about because he has to use the no-tears baby shampoo on her. He’d learned the hard way that regular shampoo wasn’t going to cut it the first night he’d had her, and he’d quickly resolved to not repeat that mistake ever again. 

“Ready?” Tim asks, and Charlotte nods, holding her arms up. Tim helps her undress and climb into the tub, and he sits down beside it, dropping his head against the wall as Charlotte plays in the water. She loves water, he’s discovered, and he’s looking forward to taking her to the pool or the beach in the summer. 

They don’t speak (of course they don’t) as Charlotte slides back and forth in the tub, fascinated by the way the water moves around her, and Tim finds himself longing for normalcy. 

It’s not fair, he thinks for the hundredth time. It’s not fair that Charlotte had to endure so much when she was just a baby. It’s not fair that she’s going to have years and years of therapies ahead of her. It’s not fair that she’s never once talked. 

It’s just not fucking fair.

“Can I wash your hair, baby?” Tim asks, and Charlotte looks up from where she’s using the bubbles to cover the wall of the bathtub. She nods and Tim grabs the cup he’s started keeping in the bathroom for just this purpose. He’s careful as he wets down her long curls not to get any water in her eyes, and he takes his time massaging the sweet smelling shampoo into her hair. She likes this part, too, as long as nothing gets in her eyes, and she especially likes when Tim gently scratches her scalp with his fingers, massaging her head and combing through the long strands as he rinses it.

She stares at him when he’s done, and her eyes are glazed with exhaustion. Tim smiles and leans down to kiss her on the forehead. He pulls the plug and then grabs a large, fluffy towel to burrito Charlotte up in. He holds her close as he brings her to her bedroom, and helps her change into a pair of Disney themed panties before grabbing her lavender lotion and massaging it into her arms and legs and belly. 

When she’s soft and clean and sweet smelling, Tim dresses her in pajamas and brushes her hair. She’s half asleep when he’s finished, and he finds that he doesn’t want to leave her alone tonight. 

They both need to be close to each other.

“Want to sleep with daddy?” he asks, and Charlotte nods, sticking her thumb in her mouth as Tim picks her up. 

He feels like he may be spoiling her, carrying her everywhere and treating her like a child much younger than she is, but… 

Well, she probably hadn’t been carried and snuggled and babied when she was an actual baby, and he doesn’t care if he’s ‘spoiling’ her, he’s damn well going to give her the love and affection she missed out on for the first five years of her life. 

They snuggle together in Tim’s bed, and they both sleep much better than they had the night before. 

___________________

The next morning goes off without a hitch and Tim breathes a sigh of relief as he and Charlotte walk into the school building without a single tear shed between the two of them. 

It’s an accomplishment, honestly, and he’s proud of both of them. 

“Good morning!” Lucy greets as they walk up to the classroom, and Tim smiles at her. Charlotte lets go of his hand and runs into Lucy’s legs, hugging her and grinning up at her, and Tim just stares, because his little girl loves Lucy so much. 

“We are in a much better mood this morning,” Tim explains, and he hands Charlotte her tiny, pink and purple backpack. She takes it and walks it over to her cubby, hanging it up and then grinning back at Tim and Lucy before she walks over to her seat, all on her own, and begins to play with the morning work tub on her table. There are blocks in it, and she immediately begins stacking them. 

Tim stuffs his hands in his pockets and surveys the classroom. They’re not the first ones there; there are other parents hanging around, standing or sitting by their children, and Tim awkwardly shuffles on his feet, because what should he be doing?

“Welcome to your first class party.” Lucy says, and Tim chuckles as he looks back and forth between the children and Lucy.

“Should be fun,” he says. And then, “What can I do to help?”

“Well, once we get started after the bell rings, I’m mostly just going to have you follow Charlotte around. Normally the parents help me run the games, but I have a feeling that Charlotte is going to need some help and also she probably won’t transition well between the stations because she doesn’t like moving from one activity to the other. If you’re with her, it’ll be easier. But for now… honestly, I’m going to shamelessly use you as a bodyguard to keep Chris away.”

Tim raises an eyebrow, and Lucy nods her head in the direction of a man standing beside the chair of a little boy. He keeps glancing in Lucy’s direction and smiling and waving, and while Lucy doesn’t ignore him, she doesn’t go out of her way to  pay attention to him either. 

“Oh?” he asks, and Lucy grimaces as she busies herself with piles of craft materials on her desk. 

“He volunteers a lot. Which is sweet, but… well, he spends the entire time talking to me and not paying attention to Conrad.”

Tim grins and bumps Lucy’s shoulder with his own. “Sounds like someone has a crush on you.”

Lucy blushes and grimaces. “Yes, that’s the problem.”

“You don’t date parents?” Tim asks, and he tries to sound nonchalant, but he’s actually… invested in her answer, a little bit. 

He’s not thought that far ahead, honestly, because Charlotte has taken every single bit of his attention the past two weeks, but… well, Lucy is nice. And pretty and funny and he likes her. 

He thinks, if he ever gets to a place where he’s not barely treading water… well. 

“That’s not… necessarily why,” Lucy hedges, and she glances at Tim, a light blush staining her cheeks. “He’s just… persistent. I’ve given him several hints that I’m not interested, but he keeps asking me to dinner or for drinks or … or whatever, and there’s only so many ways you can say no .”

“So it’s not a parent thing, it’s a Chris thing,” Tim clarifies, and Lucy nods. 

She very carefully does not look at Tim while she speaks. 

“It’s definitely not a parent thing. That’s… not a problem.”

Tim grins but keeps his eyes on where Charlotte is focused on building her block tower. 

“Good to know.”

Lucy smiles and blushes, and then hands Tim a tub full of glue sticks. 

“Can you pass these out?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Tim says, and he winks at her before he walks away from her reading table. He stops by Charlotte’s desk to kiss her on the cheek, and then, when she reaches out to take his hand and won’t let go, he ropes her into helping, explaining that they need to give one glue stick to each child. Charlotte nods very seriously, and Tim holds the bucket while she passes the glue out. 

While they’re passing glue out to the blue table, Tim overhears Conrad telling Chris, “Daddy, that’s the girl that doesn’t talk . She’s weird.”

Chris gives both Tim and Charlotte a look , and Tim bristles. He glares at the man and his son, and then brushes his hand over Charlotte’s hair. 

“Want to bring the extras back to Ms. Lucy, baby?” he asks, and Charlotte nods, taking the bucket from Tim and holding it in both of her tiny little arms. 

Tim crosses his arms over his chest and glares at Chris as he stands up. He knows that the man is making all sorts of assumptions in his head about either Charlotte or him as her father, of both. 

“She is not weird,” he whispers fiercely, and he’s shocked to feel anger building in his chest. He’ll do anything, he thinks, to protect Charlotte from people who want to hurt her, even if all they want to hurt is her feelings. “And I would appreciate it if you didn’t encourage your son to make rude comments about my child.”

Chris scoffs. “I didn’t encourage him.”

Tim’s frown deepens. “By not telling him it’s wrong to call people weird or judge them when you know nothing, you’re encouraging him. You have no idea what Charlotte has been through, and both you and your son could practice a little compassion.”

Chris looks like he’s about to say something, but Tim doesn’t want to hear it. 

He turns and walks back to Lucy’s desk.

Chapter Text

“As they made their way back to shore, Edward felt the sun on his face and the wind blowing through the little bit of fur left on his ears, and something filled his chest, a wonderful feeling. He was glad to be alive. ”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Charlotte brings over the glue bucket when she and Tim are done passing them out, and Lucy is bending down to take it from her and thank her when she notices the expression on Tim’s face as he stalks toward the reading table. 

She raises an eyebrow and he blows out a breath as he takes Charlotte’s hand into his again. 

“Conrad called Charlotte weird and Chris just stood by and let it happen.”

Lucy frowns and glances toward Chris and his son, her heart aching at the thought of the other kids being mean to Charlotte. She knew it would happen eventually ― kids could be mean, and often were mean to people who were different from them. She’d been hoping that it wouldn’t happen so soon, though. 

Charlotte had only been in their class for a week.

“It looks like we’ll be having some lessons on kindness and empathy when we get back from Christmas Break,” she murmurs darkly, and she’s reaching for the craft supplies even as she talks. “If they don’t learn it at home, we can at least try and teach them at school.”

Tim nods and takes the cotton balls from Lucy. 

“How many for each kiddo?” he asks, and Lucy shrugs. 

“Just a handful. We’re making cotton ball snowman picture frame ornaments. They’re going to be adorable.”

Tim smiles and then glances at the example Lucy holds out to him. It’s a wooden snowman picture frame with a loop of string on it so that it can hang on a Christmas Tree. Inside the snowman’s face is a place for a picture, and in the example Lucy has used a picture of herself. She’s smiling in the photo and Tim finds himself captivated by it. The snowman’s body is covered in cotton balls which have been glued onto the wood, and Lucy has added buttons down the snowman’s torso and popsicle stick arms, colored black with marker. 

“These are cute,” he says, and he’s already planning on taking Charlotte to get a Christmas tree over the weekend just so she can hang her ornament on it. 

Lucy smiles and blushes.  “Thanks. Um, so if you could pass out one of the wooden ornaments and a handful of cotton balls to each child, they can start gluing them on while I pass out buttons and popsicle sticks and markers. Charlotte, do you want to help me pass out supplies, or do you want to sit down in your seat?”

Charlotte looks up at Lucy, and she’s smiling around the fingers she has in her mouth. She holds out her free hand and Lucy passes her the bucket of black markers. 

“One for each person,” she says, and Charlotte nods seriously, taking her fingers out of her mouth so that she can hug the tub of markets to her chest carefully. “Thank you, Charlotte.”

The kindergartener giggles and bounces off, carefully handing each one of her friends a marker, and Tim smiles as he begins to pass out the other supplies. 

The other parent volunteers spread out, one to a table,  and help the children put their craft together. It goes much more smoothly than Tim would have anticipated, considering all of the parts of the craft,  but Lucy has eight volunteers in addition to him, and they’re able to help anyone who needs it without much trouble. 

There’s Christmas music playing quietly in the background, and Charlotte is smiling the whole time she’s gluing cotton balls onto her snowman. Tim is helping her, holding the glue stick out so she can swipe each cotton ball over it, and Lucy finds herself watching them far more often than she should. 

She forces herself to focus on her other students, and makes sure to take plenty of pictures to send to the parents who couldn’t make it for the party. 

After the snowman crafts are finished and drying on the back counter, and after they’ve cleaned up all of the mess, Lucy corrals the kids onto the carpet and puts on a StorylineOnline story for them to listen to while she gathers the parents and asks for help passing out the snack. 

The rest of the party moves along easily, and Lucy has never been more thankful to have so many volunteers. She has more students this year than she’s ever had before, and she’d been worried, but her students eat their snacks and play the winter themed games with excitement and laughter. 

There are four games with two parents stationed at each game, and Lucy finds herself with extra time on her hands. Normally she has to run one of the games, but this time she’s able to walk around, taking pictures and talking to the parents of the children. 

She spends plenty of time pointedly not talking to Tim, even though she’s constantly glancing in his direction, smiling softly as he helps Charlotte play toilet paper roll bowling or ‘pin the nose on the snowman’. She watches as he holds both of Charlotte’s tiny hands in his as they do Snowman Hopscotch, and her chest aches with how much this little family has come to mean to her. 

She’s a little bit in love with Charlotte, and just wants what’s best for her, she tries to convince herself, but she knows it’s more than that. 

“Lucy.”

She’s snapped out of her thoughts when she hears a voice behind her shoulder, and she smiles as she turns around to see Chris and Conrad behind her. 

“Hi,” she greets, and she’s managed to avoid him up until this point, but he’s got her cornered now when she’s clearly not busy. All of the games are running smoothly without her, so she doesn’t even have the excuse of a kindergartener meltdown to get away from Chris. 

He’s not a bad guy, she thinks… he’s just persistent when she’s already been clear. 

“How have you been? It’s been a while since I’ve been able to volunteer, and I see you have some new students. How’s it going?”

Lucy glances back over to Charlotte and Tim, and finds herself smiling softly at them as Charlotte giggles and holds out both of her hands for Tim to pick her up. He does, and then he does the hopscotch path while holding her, and she laughs and laughs as he hops and bounces along the path. 

“It’s been a great year so far,” she says honestly. 

“How’s the new kiddo? Conrad has told me about her. She seems… challenging.”

Lucy bristles, because seriously?

“I’m afraid I can’t share that with you,” she says, though what she wants to say is more along the lines of ‘that’s none of your goddamn business’. “I can only talk to you about your student, so unless you have questions or concerns about Conrad, then…”

She trails off, and Chris awkwardly clears his throat. 

“Sorry, you’re completely right. I overstepped and I’m sorry. I’m just concerned about you, Lucy,” he says, and he reaches a hand out to touch her arm. 

“You don’t need to be,” Lucy tells him, and she smoothly inches away as Chris moves closer. “I’m fine. I hope you and Conrad enjoy the rest of the party.”

She walks away, pretending to check in with one of the parents who are running the game ‘pin the carrot on the snowman’, and then makes sure to stay busy for the rest of the party. 

By the time the party ends it’s almost lunchtime for the kids, and Lucy waves and thanks each parent as they leave. Tim is the last to go, and he lingers in the doorway because he can see the way Charlotte is yawning and slumping in her seat. 

“Will she be OK?” he asks, because he knows a lot of her emotional outbursts have happened when she’s been tired. 

“She’ll be fine,” Lucy reassures him, and she puts a hand on Tim’s arm as she gestures to where the kids are all half asleep watching Frosty the Snowman. “We’re finishing up the movie, having lunch, and then going home. If she’s not fine I’ll call you, but I bet she’ll make it through the rest of the day without issues and then crash when you pick her up.”

“OK,” Tim says, and he’s learned to trust Lucy when it comes to these things. “You’re the kindergartener whisperer.”

Lucy chuckles and leans against the door, glancing back at her class to make sure everyone is still watching the movie without causing issues. They are (and in fact a few of them might even be asleep), and Lucy smiles at Tim as he sticks his hands in his pockets and hovers awkwardly in the doorway. 

“Thanks for coming today,” she whispers, and Tim nods.

“It was fun. Thanks for inviting me.”

“I’ll see you at pick up?” she asks, and then, “And … we should probably talk about what days would be good for me to come over and tutor Charlotte. I’m free pretty much all of break.”

“Even on Christmas day?” Tim asks, because he would have thought she would spend the holidays with family. 

“Well,” she says, and she smiles sadly as she looks down at her hands. “My parents and I aren’t really on speaking terms this year. They… they don’t approve of my life choices. So, I’ll spend the morning with friends and then I’m planning on spending some quality time with my couch and a bottle of wine.”

Tim’s brain to mouth filter must be broken, because he immediately blurts out, “You could have Christmas dinner with me and Charlotte. We’re not doing anything huge, but she deserves it, you know? She’s never had a real Christmas. So we’re going to make a turkey and stuffing and pie and … and you could come, if you wanted.”

Lucy looks up in shock, and Tim worries briefly that he’s overstepped, but a small smile slowly tugs on her lips. 

“I would like that,” she says, and she’s blushing again as if she doesn’t know what that blush does to Tim.  “I’ll still bring the wine, though, if that’s OK. And I can bring my famous mashed potatoes and gravy.”

“Perfect,” Tim says, and he grins as he shuffles back and forth in the kindergarten hallway. 

He feels like a nervous teenager, and it’s a new feeling for him. 

“Okay,” Lucy says, and then she glances back into the room just as a little boy throws a crayon at one of his friends. “Oops. I have to go. I’ll see you soon.”

Tim nods and waves and then walks down the hallway toward the front door. He’s barely paying attention to where he’s going (he’s far too occupied by thoughts of Lucy and Christmas), and he bumps into another teacher just as he’s turning the corner. 

“Oh, geez, I’m sorry,” he says, and he reaches out to steady the young woman he’s almost knocked over. She’s tall and thin with curly, blonde hair, and she smiles at Tim when she sees him. 

“Oh! No worries. As a kinder teacher, I walk backwards a lot… you tend to bump into a lot of people that way!”

“Oh, you teach kindergarten?” Tim asks, and he smiles back  at her as she tucks a loose strang of hair behind her ear. “My daughter is in kindergarten. She’s in Ms. Lucy’s class.”

“Yeah, I do,” the woman says, and she nods toward the door next to Lucy’s. “I’m Miss McGrady. Ashley.”

Tim holds out his hand and shakes hers. “I’m Tim. It’s nice to meet you.”

“You, too,” Ashley says, and she stares at him for a moment longer before pointing toward her room. “I… I should go. Maybe I’ll see you around, Tim.”

“Yeah, maybe,” he responds, and he waves as he continues on his way out the door. 

Chapter Text

“If you have no intention of loving or being loved, then the whole journey is pointless.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Tim doesn’t quite know what possesses him, but as he and Charlotte cuddle up together on the couch to watch Frozen after school and a nap, he takes out his phone, navigates to Lucy’s contact information, and sends her a text.

Tim: I’ve never picked out a Christmas tree before. At least, not that I can remember. 

Lucy Chen☀️: I feel like there’s a story behind that comment, and I also feel like that story is going to cause me to need more wine. [Image: mostly empty wine glass]

Tim: My family was a little fucked up. I’m fine now. But anyway… Charlotte and I are going to get a tree tomorrow. I don’t suppose you have opinions on Christmas Trees?

Lucy Chen☀️: I have opinions on everything, Tim. 

Tim: I don’t suppose you’d share them with me?

Lucy Chen☀️: Oh my god, Tim, just ask me to go with you. I’ll say yes.

Tim stares down at his phone, and he’s smiling so widely that his cheeks hurt. His thumbs are poised over the keyboard, and his heart is pounding hard in his chest. 

He doesn’t know what possessed him to ask Lucy to go with him, but the thought of her walking around with him and Charlotte, swinging the little girl between them as they check out trees? It causes his heart to do something funny and his chest to ache. 

He wants her to go with them.

I’ll say yes, she’d said. 

He smiles as he responds.

Tim: Lucy, would you like to come Christmas Tree shopping with us tomorrow?

Lucy Chen☀️: I’d love to. Thank you for asking me, Tim. 

Tim: You’re welcome. Want to meet us there, or at my apartment? We might need help getting it inside, too. Somehow I don’t think Charlotte is going to be too helpful. 

Lucy Chen☀️: I’ll come to your apartment first. Send me your address.

Tim grins at his phone and types out his response before staring at it, his heart in his throat. 

He presses send, and then takes a deep breath as he turns his attention back to Charlotte and the movie. There’s an annoying snowman singing about summer on the screen, and Charlotte is grinning as she watches him dance around. 

Tim: It’s a date, then. 

Lucy Chen☀️: I’ll see you tomorrow, Tim. 😉

Tim drops his phone onto the couch and takes several deep breaths before burying his face in Charlotte’s hair and breathing in her sweet, lavender scent. 

She makes a noise and turns to look at him with big, blue, questioning eyes, but Tim just kisses her on the forehead and shakes his head as he pulls her further into his lap and rewraps the blanket around her. 

“Nothing’s wrong, baby. Daddy just wanted to cuddle you.”

Charlotte smiles and lays her head on his chest, and Tim holds her tight against him. He’s already planning their day tomorrow; he thinks he could get Lucy to agree that they need to stop for lunch before bringing the tree back to his place. And maybe she’ll even go ornament shopping with him, since the only one he has is the craft Charlotte had made in class today. 

It should probably concern him how much he wants to be around Lucy, how much time he wants to spend with her, but it doesn’t. 

The only thing he feels is excited.

________________

Charlotte nearly derails their plans entirely the following morning because she’s still screaming and throwing a fit over having to wear pants when there’s a knock on the door. Tim sighs and tosses the tiny pair of jeans over his shoulder as he walks toward the door, opening it and wincing when he sees Lucy standing on the other side. 

She gives him a curious look as Charlotte’s screams echo throughout the house.

“We don’t want to wear pants today,” Tim explains, deadpan, and Lucy snorts in laughter. 

“Me, either, Charlotte,” she says, heading toward the half naked little girl. Tim had managed to get her to wear panties and a long sleeved, rainbow striped t-shirt, but she had drawn the line (firmly and loudly) at pants. 

Lucy grabs the jeans from Tim and then kneels down beside Charlotte. 

“Hey, sweetheart,” she says, and Charlotte pauses in her screaming just long enough to look at Lucy and smile. She sticks her fingers in her mouth and sucks on them, tears rolling down her cheeks, and then yells around them when she sees Lucy holding the jeans up. 

Tim joins them, perching on the edge of the couch, and he watches and hopes that Lucy can work some magic here. 

“Do you not like these pants?”

Charlotte nods and hiccups. She wipes at the tears coursing down her face and then sniffles, reaching out to touch the jeans with her fingertips before making a face. 

“Do they feel bad on your skin?” Lucy asks softly, and Charlotte nods again, this time more enthusiastically.

Lucy smiles as she turns to Tim.

“Do you have any leggings she could wear?”

Tim nods and stands up, gesturing down the hallway. He leads Lucy and a half-clothed Charlotte into the little girl’s room, flipping on the light and then walking over to her dresser. He opens the middle drawer and reaches in to grab a pair of plain, black leggings. 

“Here,” he says, and he passes them to Lucy before taking the rejected jeans away from her. 

“Let’s try these, Charlotte,” Lucy says, and then holds them out when Charlotte looks wary. She reaches out slowly, running her fingers over the soft cotton, and then sighs happily and nods. Lucy holds them up and Charlotte grabs onto her shoulders, using her for balance as she steps into them. 

“Thank fuck,” Tim whispers, and Lucy chuckles as she pulls the legging up over Charlotte’s bottom. Tim takes over and puts her socks and shoes on, and then stands up, sighing in relief.

“How did you know?” he asks, and Lucy shrugs as she takes Charlotte’s hand in her own. 

“Some children on the autism spectrum don’t like certain materials. I would stay away from jeans for Charlotte. I know she’s worn them before, but that was early on when you had her. She may have not felt safe enough to try and communicate that they were bothering her. She feels safe now, and I doubt you’ll get her to wear them again.”

“We’ll add a Walmart trip on to our to-do list today, then,” Tim says, and he’s already planning on buying the same soft, cotton leggings in every color and pattern they have. 

“Sounds fun,” Lucy says, and Tim hadn’t necessarily been asking her to come, but only because he didn’t want to overstep. He wants her there, with them, as they pick our new clothes for Charlotte. He could use her expertise, apparently, when it comes to different materials for Charlotte to wear. 

Lucy smiles and rocks back and forth on her heels while they watch Charlotte stomp around the room in her light up shoes. 

“Ready to go find a tree?” Tim asks, and he’s grinning widely. “I’ve never… had a real tree before. When we did do Christmas when I was a kid, we had a plastic tree. I’m probably  more excited than Charlotte, to be honest.”

Lucy nods and reaches out to take Charlotte’s hand. The little girl wraps her fingers around Lucy’s, and then sticks her free thumb in her mouth, but follows along without complaint. 

“Let’s go find a Christmas tree,” she agrees, and Charlotte makes a happy noise as they leave the apartment all together. 

________________

It’s on the way to the Christmas tree lot that Tim puts his foot in his mouth and nearly fucks everything up. 

“How well do you know Ashley?” he asks, and he can sense the mood change in the truck immediately.

He chances a glance over at Lucy, and she’s biting her lip and staring down in her lap. His heart races, because what did he do?

“Um, you mean Ms. McGrady?” Lucy asks, and her heart is beating fast in her chest because of course Tim had run into her and wants to know more. The other kindergarten teacher, with whom Lucy has worked the past three years, is tall, blonde, and thin. She’s hot and of course Tim wants to know more about her. 

Lucy swallows thickly, and wonders if she’s been reading the signs all wrong. 

She had thought … but  oh, well. 

Maybe Tim really did only want her here for Charlotte’s sake. 

“Yeah, I bumped into her the other day and she mentioned she taught kindergarten,” Tim says, and he shifts in his seat, wondering what he said wrong and how he can fix it. 

Lucy shrugs, and turns to look out her window because she will not let Tim see the emotion on her face. 

“She’s nice. We’ve worked together for a few years. We don’t hang out a lot, so I don’t know her personally very well. I don’t think she’s dating anyone.”

“OK,” Tim says, and frowns, because that’s not what he was asking. “But like, is she a good teacher?”

Lucy turns back to Tim, confusion clear on her face, and says, “I think so? Her kids like her class. They’re a little rowdy, but…  I mean, it’s kindergarten, so…”

“OK,” Tim says, and he’s nodding. “So like, if we retain Charlotte, would Ashley be a good fit for her? Or is there someone else you’d recommend?”

Lucy feels her heart shatter, and she glances into the backseat of the truck, her eyes taking in the way Charlotte bounces and wiggles in her seat to a tune only she can hear. She has her stuffed bunny with her and she’s watching raptly as the trees pass outside her window. 

She’d assumed that she would have Charlotte again, if Tim were to retain her in kindergarten. She’s fallen hopelessly in love with the little girl, quirks and trauma and autism spectrum disorder and all. She can’t imagine knowing that Charlotte is in kindergarten and not her class, and she wonders what she did that made Tim now want his daughter with her anymore. 

She’s picking out a Christmas tree with them, for fucks sake. Why wouldn’t Tim want her to be Charlotte’s teacher next year?

“I … I don’t know,” she whispers finally, and Tim presses on the brake when  he sees the tears glistening in her eyes. He hits the button to turn his emergency blinkers on and pulls over to the side of the road before throwing the truck into park and turning his whole body toward Lucy. 

“What’s wrong?” he asks, and he reaches out to touch Lucy’s arm but stops before he makes contact. 

If he’s the one who upset her, she might not want him to touch her. 

Lucy shrugs, and she’s trying to act nonchalant, but a single tear slips free from her eye and trails sluggishly down her cheek, and Tim’s heart aches. 

“What did I do, Lucy? Did… did I say something wrong? Why are you crying?”

Lucy shrugs again and then opens her mouth to take a breath. When she speaks, her voice cracks, and she wishes she’d driven separately because she needs to get the fuck away from Tim if she’s going to retain any of her dignity.

“I just… I assumed I would be Charlotte’s teacher again next year,” she whispers, and Tim realizes in that moment that he’s gone about this all wrong. 

“Oh, Lucy,” he murmurs, and he unbuckles his seatbelt and scoots across the front bench to take her into his arms. She stiffens and he worries for one long moment that she’s going to push him away, but eventually she deflates and melts into his arms. “I didn’t… god, I fucked this up. I asked about Ashley only because… I don’t think you can be Charlotte’s teacher next year. Not because you did anything wrong, you’re fucking amazing, you know that, right? But… I think that us, you and me? It might… it might not be professional if you’re Charlotte’s teacher.”

Lucy pulls back and looks at Tim in confusion, and he groans, frustrated with himself and his inability to clearly communicate what he wants to say. 

He takes a deep breath, and tries again. 

“Lucy. I want you to be Charlotte’s teacher forever. I wish you could be her teacher in 1st grade and 2nd grade and every grade. But …”

Lucy sniffles and wipes her tears away, and Tim is fucking terrified that she’s going to say ‘no’ or even just laugh in his face, but he’s hurt her with his inability to communicate, so he owes her this. 

“I asked about other teachers for Charlotte because I want to take you to dinner, like… like as a date, and I don’t think it would be professional to have Charlotte in your class next year if we’re dating.”

Lucy sucks in a surprised breath, her eyes wide as she glances back up at Tim. 

Oh.

She’d gotten it all wrong. 

He wasn’t interested in Ashley like that … he was interested in her, and just wanted to scope out which teacher would be best for Charlotte if the little girl couldn’t be in her class. 

“Oh,” she says softly, and Tim nods, though Lucy can see the uncertainty in his eyes. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Tim whispers, and he reaches out to brush away the tears clinging stubbornly to Lucy’s eyelashes. “Oh.”

“Um… in that case, n-no, I don’t recommend Ashley. I… our other teammate, Jackson West. He’s a new teacher, but he’s amazing, and Charlotte would do great with him.”

“OK,” Tim says, and he’s smiling softly now, though he’s still fucking nervous. “So… does that mean… I mean, do you want to go to dinner with me sometime, Lucy?”

Lucy smiles and nods, and chuckles as a huge smile breaks out over Tim’s face.

“Yeah. I think… I’d really like that.”

“OK,” Tim says, and he leans back, moving back to his side of the truck and turning it back on with shaking hands.

They both smile like smitten teenagers the rest of the way to the Christmas Tree lot. 

Chapter Text

“Once, oh marvelous once, there was a rabbit who found his way home.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Tim

Charlotte’s eyes are wide with excitement as she begins bouncing up and down, squealing at random intervals as they walk through the rows and rows of Christmas trees. They all look the same to Tim, but Lucy has been eyeing them critically and declining each one for various reasons that Tim doesn’t understand (though he doesn’t question it). 

“Too tall.”

“Too short.”

“Oooh this one is nice… wait, that branch is broken.”

Tim smiles and shakes his head each time she vetoes one, and he finds it’s impossible to be annoyed when both she and Charlotte are having so much fun. 

His favorite part, though, is when Charlotte tries to run off, again, and so Tim takes one of her hands and Lucy takes the other, and then they swing her between them. 

“Aaaaand up we go!” Lucy sings, and they raise Charlotte between them, swinging her by her arms, and Charlotte squeals loudly, giggling and kicking her legs out as she flies through the air. Her feet hit the ground in a rainbow of color from her light up shoes, and then she tugs on their arms, smiling widely, and demands they do it again. 

Neither Tim or Lucy are very good at denying her anything she wants, and so they spend more time swinging her between them than they do looking at trees.

In the end, though, it doesn’t matter, because Charlotte is the one who ends up picking the tree. 

They’ve just put her down after swinging her for possibly the hundredth time. Lucy takes her hand back to wipe it on her jeans, and while Tim is distracted, Charlotte slips her hand from his and runs off, and it takes Tim a moment to notice, but when  he does, he panics.

“Charlotte!” he calls, and she can’t have gone far, he thinks, because it’s only been seconds and she has tiny legs. 

Lucy takes his hand in his panic and leads him through the rows of trees, and it doesn’t take them long to find her, but Tim is still considering buying one of those little leash backpacks that he used to laugh at other parents for using. 

He gets it now.

“Charlotte!” he calls, and he runs to where she’s sitting in front of a tall, brilliant green Douglas Fir. It’s almost as tall as Tim is, and the branches are thick and long. There are no bare patches and it’s the perfect height. 

Charlotte has her fingers in her mouth and she’s pointing to the tree, her lips stretched in a smile around her hand, and Tim wants to be mad at her for running off but he can’t be. 

“Baby, you can’t run off like that. You scared daddy,” he murmurs, and he kneels down to wrap his arms around her. She giggles and squirms in his arms, not trying to escape but instead trying to draw attention to the tree. 

“Eee!” she squeals. Tim knows she’s trying to say ‘tree’, and his heart swells when he imagines her actually saying words for the first time. 

He knows that when she does he’s going to lose it, and that he’ll probably bawl, but he can’t wait.

“Yeah, it’s a very nice tree, baby. Should we get this one?”

Charlotte nods frantically, and then turns around in Tim’s arms, one hand pressing to his face. She pats his cheek repeatedly, but Tim doesn’t know what she wants. He looks to Lucy, but she seems to be at a loss, too. 

“I’m sorry, baby, I don’t understand. What do you need?” he asks, and Charlotte presses her hand to his cheek to move his gaze as she points to another tree on the lot, one that’s lit up with lights and ornaments.

Tim smiles and feels moisture in his eyes, and he refuses to cry, damn it, but watching Charlotte’s excitement and happiness is breaking his heart. 

She’s probably never had a Christmas Tree, or lights, or ornaments, and Tim finds himself wanting to go all out. He wants to make this a Christmas that she’ll remember, with a beautiful tree and presents and wonderful memories. 

He turns to Lucy and smiles, and she’s staring at them both with such a soft look in her eyes that Tim’s chest feels heavy. 

“Do… do you want to decorate the tree with us?” he asks, and he hopes she says yes. 

He knows it’s greedy, but he wants Lucy to spend as much of their Christmas Break with them as she possibly can. 

“We can get cocoa and watch Christmas movies and decorate the tree together,” he says, his voice quiet and hopeful, and Lucy doesn’t think she could deny him even if she wanted to.

She definitely can’t deny Charlotte when the little girl turns around in Tim’s arms again, eyes wide and sparkling. She squeaks around the fingers in her mouth and bounces up and down, her shoes lighting up in her excitement. 

“I’d love to,” she whispers, and then she laughs at Charlotte’s scream of happiness as Tim swoops her up into his arms. He settles the little girl on his shoulders and holds one of her ankles in his hand so she doesn’t fall, and he laughs brightly as Lucy walks over and presses into his side. She takes his free hand and entwines their fingers, and it feels so good and right to have her here.

They buy the tree and load it into the bed of the truck, and then Tim buckles Charlotte into her car seat before opening Lucy’s door and helping her climb in. 

He knows she doesn’t need the help, but he wants to help her. He wants to open her door and pull out chairs for her and hold her hand. 

She thanks him and he smiles before walking around to his own side. 

“To Walmart!” Lucy declares once he’s in the truck, and Charlotte giggles from the backseat, mimicking Lucy’s sounds (though not forming words), and tim glances at her in the mirror before putting the truck into drive. 

“My ladies have spoken,” he says, winking, and he thinks he would do anything to keep Lucy and Charlotte smiling so happily. 

_______________

Once they’re in Walmart, Tim settles Charlotte into the baby seat on the cart and buckles her in so that she can’t run away. He knows she’s probably too big to be sitting in the baby seat, but until he comes up with a better way to keep her contained it’ll have to do. 

“All right. So let’s do the necessities shopping first. We need some new clothes for Charlotte, and a few food items, and then we can buy every ornament this store has.”

Lucy laughs and agrees, and she walks along the side of the cart as Tim adds tomatoes, chicken nuggets (so many chicken nuggets, why won’t Charlotte eat anything else?), yogurt, hot cocoa, marshmallows, eggs, and milk to the basket. He glances at the list on his phone, and then nods to himself. 

“That’s it for food. Let’s go check out clothes. Charlotte wears 3T even though she’s five, and it’s still loose on her so we won’t size up yet.”

Lucy nods and then frowns, because she’d known that Charlotte was small, but to be wearing a 3T? And for it to be too big on her?

“She’ll grow,” Tim murmurs, and he hopes it’s true. She doesn’t eat much or well, and he wonders if he should add a dietitian to the list of specialists he’s trying to make appointments with. “I’ll ask her doctor about it Tuesday. Her appointment is first thing in the morning.”

“Good idea,” Lucy says, and then she pauses in front of a display of t-shirts that are impossibly small. “Oh my god these are so cute. Here, Charlotte, what do you think about this?”

She holds out one of the shirts and lets Charlotte touch it. The material is fine, but once she touches the plastic of the design she makes a face and shoves it away from her. 

“So, plain tops,” Tim surmises, and bypasses all of the shirts with designs and sequins. He makes sure to pass each one to Charlotte for approval before adding it to the cart, and by the time they’re done they have a pile of short and long-sleeved t-shirts for Charlotte in stripes, polka dots, solid colors, and tie dye. He adds a down coat, though it doesn’t get cold too often in LA, and a few hoodies and sweaters that pass the Charlotte Test. 

Next, Lucy leads them over to a display of pants, and they repeat the process. Charlotte vetoes jeans and anything with buttons or snaps, so they end up only being able to choose from the leggings, cotton shorts, and sweatpants. Tim adds a variety of colors and patterns to the cart, and then turns when he hears Lucy’s squeal of excitement. 

“Oh these are so cute, Tim, and I think she’ll wear them,” she says, and she holds up a small, ruffled skirt. It has an elastic waistband much like the leggings, and no buttons, clasps, or snaps, so Tim takes it from Lucy and holds it out to Charlotte. She holds it and runs her thin fingers over the material before looking up at Tim and nodding. 

“All right, that should be enough for now. I’m going to have to donate more than half of the stuff I originally got her. Thinking back, her most moody days were the days I dressed her in jeans. I hate to think that I’ve been fucking even the most simple things up,” he murmurs, and Lucy reaches out to take his hand in hers as they walk toward the socks and underwear aisle. 

“You didn’t know,” she says, her voice soft. “Now that you do, you’ll do better. You’re working with a steep learning curve here, Tim, and you’re doing an amazing job with Charlotte.”

“I hope so,” Tim whispers, and he wants to lean over and kiss Lucy’s cheek, or her hair, but he doesn’t want to move too fast or be too forward, so insteads he squeezes her hand and then lets it drop when they reach the underwear aisle. 

Charlotte squeaks excitedly when she sees a pack of Frozen underwear, and Tim holds it out to her. He knows he’s not supposed to, but he takes a pair out of the pack and lets Charlotte touch them, anyway. She makes a face at the material of the ruffles around the legs, and Tim’s glad he checked. He puts them back on the shelf, and searches for Frozen themed ones without ruffles. 

“These might work,” Lucy says, and Tim turns and watches as she hands a pair to Charlotte. They’re plain cotton with elastic waistbands and Disney designs, and Charlotte nods as she touches them. 

“Perfect. Now, socks, and then we’re good.”

Once they find and add more socks to the cart (because Tim doesn’t know where they’re going, but he’s managed to lose over half of the socks he’d originally bought for Charlotte), he turns the cart toward the Christmas section of the store. 

He turns and grins at Lucy, his blue eyes sparkling. 

“Ready?” he asks, and she nods as she watches Charlotte’s eyes light up as she sees the Christmas Tree display in the distance. 

“Ready.”

Chapter Text

“And Edward was surprised to discover that he was listening. Before, when Abilene had talked to him, everything had seemed so boring, so pointless. But now, the stories Nellie told struck him as the most important thing in the world and he listened as if his life depended on what she said."

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

By the time they arrive back at Tim’s apartment and unload the tree, all of Charlotte’s new things, and the entire Christmas decoration section of Walmart from the truck, Charlotte is drooping, her eyes fluttering closed as she slumps forward in her seat. Tim smiles softly as he unbuckles the harness and lifts her from the carseat, tucking her against his shoulder and kissing her forehead.

Lucy’s heart just about explodes from the cuteness, and she sighs happily as she watches Tim carry his little girl up the stairs. 

“I think it’s naptime,” he murmurs, and Charlotte makes a noise of protest but lets him change her into pajamas and tuck her into bed once they’re inside. 

Lucy watches it all from Charlotte’s doorway, and as she watches them she falls just a little bit further in love with the family. 

After tucking Charlotte in, Tim walks up to Lucy and puts a hand on her hip, guiding her gently from Charlotte’s room so that he can close the door, and then he looks down at her, his eyes soft and his smile sweet. 

He doesn’t take his hand off of her hip, and it occurs to Lucy that they’re standing very close together. 

“Thank you,” he says, and Lucy nods, unable to form words. She can’t look away from him, from his seafoam blue eyes or his little smile, and she wants to kiss him. 

She doesn’t, because they haven’t even had dinner yet, but she wants to. 

“For what?” she finally manages, and Tim chuckles as his hand flexes on her hip. His fingers are digging into her skin, and Lucy feels dizzy. She needs to take a step back or she’s going to do something stupid. 

“For coming with us. For helping me with Charlotte. For loving her so much. For everything, really.”

Lucy nods and then lays her head on Tim’s chest. He stiffens a little in surprise but then sighs, melting into the touch. The hand on her hip slides around her back, holding her close, and they stand like that in the hallway for several long moments. 

Tim is the first one to pull away, but he doesn’t go far. He puts just enough space between them that he can meet Lucy’s eyes, and smiles as he nods toward the kitchen. 

“I was going to try and convince you that we should all go out for lunch,” he says, and he still wants to do that, but, “Naptime is not to be messed with. A cranky Charlotte is a force to be reckoned with. So… do you want to help me make lunch instead?”

“Of course,” Lucy says, and she leans up and kisses Tim on the cheek because she only has so much self control, and then takes his hand and pulls him toward the kitchen. He goes willingly, entwining their fingers as they walk. 

It’s amazing how close they’ve gotten in just a little over a week, but he thinks that this was inevitable. From the first moment he saw Lucy, when she had walked away from the table with him and Principal Grey so that she could sit with his scared, shy daughter… he knew that they’d end up here. 

Once they’re in the kitchen Tim backs Lucy up against the counter, his hands falling to her hips to hold her close to him, and he leans down to press his forehead against hers. 

“Lucy,” he whispers, and he feels breathless and weak, surrounded by her. By her scent and her touch and everything that she is. 

“Tim,”  she responds, and she’s smiling, her eyes sparkling as she meets his gaze. Her body is warm where she’s pressed against him, head to toe, and he sighs in contentment as he revels in her presence. 

“Is it … do we have to wait until you’re not Charlotte’s teacher?” he asks, and his lips are so close that she can feel them brushing against hers as he talks. 

And the thing is… Lucy doesn’t know. 

She’s never seriously considered dating one of her student’s parents, or even been attracted to them the way she is to Tim. She’s been drawn to him since day one. To the way he so clearly loves the little girl who was dumped on his doorstep with no warning. To the way he strives to understand and meet Charlotte’s needs, to the way he smiles and how he always looks so bashful when he’s flirting with her. She’s drawn to him in a more primal sense, too, because he’s a beautiful man. His eyes are a beautiful blue (the same as Charlotte’s) and she feels like she could drown in them, and his body is warm and toned and she wants to touch him, to have him touch her.

“I don’t know,” she whispers, and Tim closes his eyes, taking a deep breath as he backs up exactly one step.

“You have to know I’m attracted to you,” he murmurs, and Lucy nods. He’s attracted to her and she’s attracted to him; she wants him, in every way. Tim continues, “But… I want to do this right. I want to take you to dinner and hold your hand and kiss you goodnight when I drop you off at home. I want to spend time getting to know each other. I don’t want to fuck this up.”

Lucy smiles and reaches out to run her fingers across Tim’s jaw. 

“You’re not going to fuck anything up,” she reassures him. She bites her lip and then adds, “To be fair, I will probably be the one to fuck things up. I’ve never been… serious about someone before.”

Tim grins, a cocky little grin, and asks, “Are you serious about me?”

Lucy rolls her eyes, but she can’t help but be captivated by him. 

“Yeah, I think I am.”

“Okay,” Tim murmurs, and he takes a deep breath and another step back. “Then I definitely don’t want to fuck this up, so I’m going to put some space between us before I do something stupid. Let’s make lunch and watch a movie while we wait for Charlotte to wake up, and then we can decorate the tree.”

“Okay,” Lucy agrees, and her cheeks feel warm and she can’t wipe the smile off of her face. “That sounds good.”

Tim smiles and squeezes her hip before dropping his hand. “When are you free for dinner?”

Lucy hums and pretends to think. “Like… next Friday?”

Tim glares at her, because she is not funny.

Lucy giggles and shakes her head, because she’s not sure she could wait that long, either. 

“How about Tuesday? That gives you a few days to plan something to sweep me off of my feet.”

Tim quickly counts in his head. It’s Saturday today, so… three days. 

He can probably come up with something before then. 

“Perfect. And… you know that Charlotte is probably going to have to come with us, right? I don’t have a babysitter lined up for her. I’d like to find someone, but… there are only so many people she trusts and  don’t want her to have a meltdown when I’m not there. I’m sorry, I know that’s not romantic, but―”

Lucy cuts Tim off by pressing two fingers to his lips. She’s smiling and shaking her head, because, “Tim. I understand. It’s going to take you a while to find someone you trust with her, and she’s important to you. She’s your number one girl. Of  course she can come with us.”

“How are you so amazing?” Tim asks, and Lucy shrugs, winking at him as he walks backward toward the fridge. He grabs lettuce and tomatoes and passes them to Lucy, and then lunchmeat, mayo, bread, and cheese. 

“Are sandwiches okay?” he asks, and Lucy nods, setting the ingredients on the counter. 

They work side by side to chop vegetables and put their sandwiches together, and once they each have a plate with a sandwich, some leftover potato salad Tim has in the fridge, and a beer each, they head to the living room. Tim puts the game on in the background, but neither of them pay very much attention to it as they eat. 

“I need to go Christmas shopping for Charlotte,” Tim admits, and he hates that he’s put it off this long, but he hasn’t been able to find the time. “Can you share that list with me?”

“Of course,” Lucy says, and she chews on a bite of turkey sandwich as she wipes her hands on a napkin and reaches for  her phone. “And these are just suggestions, of course. Anyone at the toy store will be able to help, too. And it seems like Charlotte likes Disney themed things, so you’ll have tons of options with that, too.”

“Oh I fully plan on avoiding the store as much as possible. Amazon can deliver pretty much anything I want to get her and it’ll be pre-wrapped,” Tim says, and he grins as his phone dings with a notification that Lucy has shared the wishlist she’s made with him. 

“Just make sure you check the shipping times. This close to Christmas, anything you want to buy will have a little note below it, letting you know if it’ll arrive before Christmas. Most things should, because Christmas isn’t until Friday, so you have almost a whole week.”

Tim nods and clicks on the first item, a set of baskets and plastic food items titled Farmer’s Market Color Sorting Set. It’s cute, and Lucy had said that Charlotte had trouble with her colors, so it’ll be perfect. The next thing on Lucy’s list is a set of wooden puzzles with the ABCs, numbers, and shapes, and the item after that is a set of interconnecting ABC blocks to build words and practice reading.

“These are all perfect,” he marvels, and he smiles over at Lucy as she watches him add things to his Amazon cart. “You’re amazing, Lu.”

There are a few things on the wishlist that aren’t educational, but they’re things that Tim knows Charlotte will love. There’s a musical instrument set, a floor piano, magnet tiles, and a set of baby dolls with a stroller, tiny plastic car seat, as well as bottles and baby items. 

“She likes the dolls in class so much,” Lucy explains, pointing to the baby doll set. “I thought she’d like that.”

“She will,” Tim murmurs, and he leans over and presses a sweet, soft kiss to Lucy’s temple.

The last few items are just for fun. There’s a tiny, princess themed tent for her bedroom, and then a few games that Lucy explains would be good for building fine motor control. 

“They require concentration and small, controlled movements,” she says, and she lays her head on Tim’s shoulder to get a better look at the toys on his phone. Tim wraps his free arm around her, and then points to a ‘suggested item’ under the one he’s just added to his cart. 

“What about this?”

Lucy smiles and nods, and Tim clicks on it. It’s a Kinetic Sand set, with seven different colors of sand, a tray, and sand molds. 

“She’ll love that,” Lucy whispers, and Tim adds it to the cart, too. He winces when he sees the total, but soldiers on because Charlotte deserves to be spoiled. She’s had so many disappointing Christmases and Tim is determined to make this Christmas one she’ll never forget. 

He’s just finished checking out and is moving his arm so that Lucy can curl closer to him if she wants to (she does) when Charlotte peeks her head into the room. 

She stares at them together on the couch for a long moment, her eyes wide and her fingers in her mouth, and then she grins so big that her eyes crinkle. 

She squeaks and runs to them, her blanky clutched in her free hand, and crawls into Tim’s lap, laying her head on his chest and her feet on Lucy’s lap.

“Hey, baby girl,” Tim murmurs, and he knows that there’s so much left to do today.

They need to set the tree up, and then string the lights and hang the ornaments, and by then it’ll be near dinner time (which he’s hoping he can convince Lucy they should go out for, since they didn’t get to for lunch). 

But he doesn’t want to move, so instead of getting up and unboxing the multitude of ornaments they had bought, he holds Charlotte closer to him and presses his cheek to Lucy’s hair. 

He’s exactly where he wants to be.

Chapter Text

“Edward was the lone contrarian. He prided himself on not hoping, on not allowing his heart to lift inside of him. He prided himself on keeping his heart silent, immobile, closed tight.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane

Tim and Lucy and Charlotte snuggle on the couch for a long time, and it’s so close to everything Lucy has ever wanted. Tim and Charlotte are everything she’s ever wanted. The way he loves and takes care of his little girl makes Lucy imagine him with their little girl, Charlotte’s baby sister, but she knows it’s way too soon. It’s way too soon to be thinking about anything like that, so before she can fall too far down that particular rabbit hole, she tickles Charlotte’s feet and smiles up at both her and Tim. 

“Want to decorate the tree?” she asks, and she nods her head toward the towering Douglas Fir in the corner. She and Tim had put it in the base and it’s just been standing there, bare and ready to be decorated. 

Charlotte nods enthusiastically, and then awkwardly tries to climb off of Tim and Lucy’s laps. Tim gets an elbow to the gut and a knee to the groin, and Lucy is laughing at him right up until Charlotte’s foot kicks her in the stomach. 

“Here,” she says, and she reaches out, wrapping her hands around Charlotte’s tiny waist. She lifts the girl up, swinging her into the air as she stands, and then puts her on the ground, taking a moment to settle her pajama top where it’s ridden up. 

“Ee!” Charlotte squeals, and she points to the tree as she bounces up and down, her feet bare and her hair a mess from her nap. “Eee!”

“Yeah, baby girl, we’re gonna decorate the tree,” Tim agrees, and he’s still wincing from her well placed kick to the crotch as he climbs off of the couch. He reaches for the pile of ornaments and lights that he and Lucy had unpacked and placed by the couch, and then turns to look at Lucy. “How should we do this?”

Lucy smiles sadly as she looks at Charlotte and Tim, both of them unsure how to decorate a Christmas tree because they’ve not done it often (or ever), and she hopes that this will be the best Christmas ever for them. 

“We should start with the lights,” she suggests, and Tim nods, taking one of the long strands. They work together to untangle it, and them Tim lets Charlotte take the lead, guiding her little hands as they tuck the bulbs into the long branches of the tree. Lucy stands back and offers tips and suggestions, making sure the lines are laid straight and neat, and when they get too far up for Charlotte to reach, Tim picks her up and settles her on his hip. 

Lucy grabs her phone and takes several pictures of them, because this is just too cute, and she knows that Tim will enjoy having these memories saved. 

When they’re done stringing the lights Tim steps back, Charlotte still on his hip, and watches as Lucy moves to plug them in. 

“Ooooooh,” Charlotte says, and Lucy has to fight tears as she looks at the wonder on the little girl’s face. She’s staring at the lights with bright, wide eyes, her little pink lips open in shock. 

“They’re pretty, huh?” Tim asks, and he bounces her in his arms. 

Charlotte nods and sticks her fingers in her mouth as she stares at the twinkling, white lights. 

Lucy turns to them, and as much as she would love to be a part of this, she thinks that, at least for a little bit, it needs to be Tim and his little girl. 

She stands on her tiptoes and kisses Tim on the cheek, smiling when she pulls back. “I’ll go make cocoa while you guys get started on the ornaments,” she whispers, and Tim nods, mouthing ‘thank you’ as she walks into the kitchen. 

Because of the layout of Tim’s apartment, she can still see them as Tim kneels down on the floor, unpacking each ornament carefully and handing it to Charlotte after showing her how to put them on the tree. She carefully hangs the first one and then steps back, giggling and bouncing in place as she watches it sway. 

Tim hangs one beside hers, and then hands her another. 

They’d chosen all plain colored ornaments in a variety of colors to go with the white lights, as well as some more ‘fun’ ornaments like Disney characters, candy canes, and snowflakes. 

The bottom of the tree where Charlotte can reach is heavily decorated when Lucy comes back with the cocoa, and she joins in to help decorate the top. 

Tim and Charlotte are all smiles and laughter as they try and even out the ornaments, but it’s a lost cause. 

When they’re done, they all step back and admire their work and it’s… not great, though Lucy loves it regardless. The ornaments aren’t balanced; there are at least twice the number on the bottom of the tree as are on the top, and they’re not organized well, but it’s perfect anyway, because they had decorated it together. 

“Perfect,” Tim decides, and Lucy laughs while Charlotte nods in agreement. 

“It is,” Lucy says, and she nudges Tim with her elbow. “Stand in front with Charlotte. Let me take a family picture.”

Tim nods and guides Charlotte over, picking her up and settling her on his hip. He turns toward Lucy, smiling brightly, and lets her take as many pictures as she wants.

After she’s finished she smiles down at her phone, selecting the best ones to send to Tim while Charlotte plops down on her butt on the floor and continues to stare at the tree in wonder. 

Tim walks up behind her and wraps his arm around Lucy’s waist, leaning briefly into her side before turning and smiling at her. 

“Thanks for coming over and helping us with the tree,” he whispers, and Lucy smiles back as she nods. 

“Of course. She seems to really like it.”

“Yeah, she loves it,” Tim agrees, and he sighs as he leans down and kisses Lucy’s hair. 

Lucy leans more heavily into him for one long, glorious moment, and then pulls away. 

“I should probably be going,” she says, though she doesn’t want to. She wants to stay as long as Tim will let her, but she also doesn’t want to overstay her welcome. Not yet. Not when they, this thing they’re doing, is so new. “But I’ll see you Tuesday?”

Tim’s smile grows when he remembers that they have a date planned in just a few days. He’s smiling so widely that his eyes crinkle and his cheeks dimple, and Lucy finds herself lost in his happiness. 

“Yeah,” he agrees, his voice soft and full of wonder. “Dinner on Tuesday.”

“Okay,” Lucy says, and she wants to kiss him. She wants to kiss him in front of the tree she helped him decorate. She wants to kiss him in his home, warm and comfortable and filled with joy and love.

But she doesn’t. 

More than she wants to kiss him, she wants to do this right. She and Tim aren’t the only ones involved, the only ones who will be hurt if she messes it up. She has to think about Charlotte, too, the little girl who has been through so much pain and uncertainty. 

So instead of kissing Tim, she says goodbye to Charlotte and lets Tim walk her to the door. She stares at him, smiling, as he stuffs his hands in his pockets and rocks back and forth in the doorway, neither of them eager to part even though Lucy knows it’s for the best. 

“I’ll see you soon,” Tim says finally.

“Try not to miss me too much,” Lucy says, winking, and Tim chuckles as he reaches out to touch her cheek. 

“I want to kiss you goodnight after our date on Tuesday,” he murmurs, and Lucy swallows hard as her eyes flicker to his lips and then back up to meet his gaze. 

“I-I’d like that,” she whispers, and Tim nods as he traces his thumb over her top lip. 

He pulls his hand back and then gives her a dorky little wave, and Lucy feels her heart beat fast because oh shit, she has it bad.

“Text me when you get home safe,” he requests, and Lucy nods as she takes a few steps backward, because if she doesn’t put some space between them she’s going to kiss him senseless. 

“Okay.”

Tim waits in the doorway until she disappears around the corner, and then closes his apartment door, still smiling like an idiot. 

He can’t wait until Tuesday. 

_____________

As soon as Lucy gets home she throws her purse on the counter and flops dramatically on the couch. 

Oh, God, but Tim is going to be the death of her. 

She’s only known the man for a week. A week! How could she be so thoroughly attuned to his touch, his smile, the deep, rich sound of his voice? How could she already crave the feeling of his skin on hers, his lips on her cheek?

How is she already falling in love with him?

With a sigh she kicks her shoes off and then digs her phone out of her pocket, scrolling to find her text message chain with Tim and opening it. She smiles and bites her lip, and then types.

Lucy Chen: I’m home safe! 👍🏼

Tim Bradford: I’m glad. Thank you again for coming over today. Charlotte had fun. [Image of Charlotte sleeping half on and half off the couch, mouth wide open]. 

Lucy Chen: We sure wore her out, huh?

Tim Bradford: Yeah. But she had a great time. Hey, she’s starting to make noises, like ‘eee’ for tree, and ‘oooh’ when she finds something pretty. Do you think she’ll talk soon?

Lucy Chen: I sure hope so! I noticed that, too. You said her appointment is Tuesday morning? You could ask then. Oh, and ask for a referral to a speech therapist. 

Lucy Cnen: I mean, I’m sure you were already planning to. 

Lucy Chen: I didn’t mean for that to sound like I’m telling you what to do. You’re her dad, obviously. 

Lucy Chen: Sorry. I’m nervous for some reason. 

Tim Bradford: Please don’t apologize, Lucy. I was planning on it, yes, but … you know more about children than I do, at this point. Your opinion is welcome. 

Lucy Chen: OK. But please tell me if I ever overstep? 

Tim Bradford: I will, but you won’t. I can use all the help I can get. 

Lucy Chen: When are you going to believe that you’re doing an amazing job with her? Because you are, Tim. You’re a good man and a good daddy. 

Lucy bites her lip after sending the message, and then stares at her text conversation with Tim. 

He is a good man, and he’s a fabulous father, and she wishes that he believed it. She knows he’s still beating himself up over not knowing about Charlotte earlier, about not being able to do anything to intervene earlier, but… 

Lucy Chen: She’s so lucky to have you. She’s going to thrive now, Tim. She’s going to do amazing things. 

Tim Bradford: I hope so. I just love her so much, you know? I didn’t know this kind of love was possible. I just want to make up for everything that happened to her before, and I know I can’t, but I can make sure she has everything she needs and wants now . 

Lucy Chen: See? Amazing daddy. I’ll keep telling you until you believe me. 

Tim Bradford: OK. 

Lucy Chen: OK. 😊

Tim Bradford: See you soon, Lucy. 

Lucy Chen: See you soon. ❤️

Chapter Text

“There is nothing sweeter in this sad world than the sound of someone you love calling your name.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Tale of Despereaux

Tuesday morning comes too soon, and before Tim knows it he’s hitching Charlotte on his hip and walking into a brightly decorated, loud, crowded pediatrician’s office. He looks around, at a complete loss, at all of the families waiting to be called for their appointments, and feels even more out of his depth than he did even when he was in Iraq. 

He walks up to the front desk and his wide, terrified eyes make the receptionist chuckle. 

“First timer?” she guesses, and Tim nods, smiling bashfully as he runs his free hand through his hair. 

“Yeah I am. I, uh, I have an appointment for Charlotte Bradford at 8:30?”

The receptionist clicks away on her keyboard and then nods. “Yes, I have her down. Here’s some paperwork to fill out. Do you have her insurance card?”

Tim hands her the papers that Rachel had given him, including Charlotte’s Medicare information. “Yeah, yeah, here you go. Um, she’s a first time patient here, too.”

“I see that,” the receptionist says, and she hands Tim a clipboard with a thick stack of papers. “I’ll get her medical insurance entered into the computer if you want to take a seat and fill that all out.”

Tim nods and swallows, grabbing the clipboard and taking a seat in a corner away from the other children. Charlotte is perfectly content to sit in his lap and suck on her thumb, silently watching as the other children in the office play with the toys provided. She doesn’t seem to want to join them, which is a relief for Tim, because he sees children coughing and sneezing and he doesn’t want Charlotte near all of those germs. 

He glances down at the forms and sighs, and the fills in what he can. He knows Charlotte’s birthday, but not her birth weight or any of the questions about Isabel’s pregnancy with her. Did Isabel have any issues during the pregnancy? Was she premature? Did she hit all of her milestones on time? He doesn’t know (though he doubts she did), so he fills in what he can and then, in the comments, writes I just received custody but I know she was born drug addicted because he feels like that’s important. 

Under “known medical issues” he jots down Charlotte’s laundry list of diagnoses, biting his lip as he does. 

Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome
PTSD
ADD/ADHD
Autism Spectrum, Level 1
Significant Developmental Delays

He adds, based on his last conversation with Rachel, 

Selective Mutism
Failure to Thrive 

He fills out the page about her vaccines, because he has a copy of her vaccine record, and while she’s behind, she’s had most of them, which Tim is grateful for. 

He walks the clipboard back to the desk when he’s done, handing it to the receptionist and taking back the papers with Charlotte’s Medicaid information. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, noting the look on the receptionist's face as she skims through the mostly empty papers. “I just got custody of her. I was in the military until just a month ago, and her mother never told me about her. I didn’t even know she existed. I swear, I’m trying… I’m trying, but I don’t know everything yet.”

Tim bites his lip and drops his eyes, because not an idiot; he knows that people judge him, especially when they see Charlotte and hear about all of her issues. They wonder where he was when she was born, why he hadn’t stepped in sooner or done something, anything. 

But he also knows it’s not his fault, and he is relieved to see that the receptionist is nodding and smiling sympathetically.

“I’ll mark that in her file. The doctor will be with you shortly, and she may have more questions, but she’ll see my note about Charlotte’s history.”

“Thanks,” Tim says, and he offers the receptionist a smile as he kisses Charlotte’s head. 

He sits back down with her and holds her, running his hand up and down her back while they wait. He can see that she’s apprehensive, being in a new place filled with people, but he’s proud of how well she’s handling it.

“Charlotte Bradford?”

Their name is called less than five minutes later, and Tim stands up, setting Charlotte on the floor before taking her hand and walking in the direction of the nurse. 

They take Charlotte’s weight and height, her blood pressure, temperature and pulse, and then they’re shown to a room decorated with cartoon characters. Tim sits with Charlotte on the bed and holds her, his arms tight around her chest in the way he’s discovered she likes when she’s overwhelmed. 

Their doctor comes in quickly, and Tim is impressed with how quickly things move in this office. At his doctor he waits up to half an hour sometimes, but everyone here is fast and friendly. 

“Hey,” he greets, and the doctor smiles as she takes a seat and logs into the computer. 

“Good morning, Mr. Bradford. I’m Dr. Lehnig and this must be Charlotte.”

Tim nods and then watches apprehensively as Dr. Lehnig begins to look through Charlotte’s file on the computer. 

“I just got custody of her,” he explains quietly. “I’ve had her for about three weeks. Her DFS worker is doing her best to get all of her records, but it doesn’t look like she visited the doctor much while her mother had her. Her mom overdosed, and … well, then DFS found me. I just got out of the military. I didn’t know about her,” he says, and he hates that he feels like he has to defend himself whenever he talks about Charlotte’s history, but he does. 

“Thank you for your service,” Dr. Lehnig begins, and then she logs out of the computer and turns to face them. “We can fill in information as you get it, but today we’ll just do a routine, yearly checkup. I noticed her weight and height are below average for her age, and saw that she was diagnosed with failure to thrive as an infant and toddler.”

“Yeah,” Tim says, and he sighs. “She’s a lot smaller than all her classmates. She wears 3T clothes.”

“She’s small, but not … dangerously so. 32 pounds, 37 inches tall is on the low end, but as long as she continues to gain weight, I won’t be overly concerned.”

“Can I still get a referral to a dietitian?” Tim asks, because he’s relieved that Charlotte’s pediatrician isn’t overly concerned, but he knows that he’s Charlotte’s best advocate right now. “This isn’t a new problem, she’s been diagnosed with failure to thrive twice, so I want to get ahead of this.”

Dr. Lehnig smiles and nods, turning and typing something into the computer. “Of course. I know a good one, Dr. Lane. She’s amazing, and I’m sure she can fit you in soon. Now, I see she’s a little behind on her vaccines. Do you want to get her caught up today?”

Tim nods and runs his hand over Charlotte’s hair, because he knows that the vaccine portion of the visit is going to be… unpleasant. 

“Yes. I also wanted to get referrals to an eye doctor, speech therapist, and … a regular therapist, though she’s still not talking so I’m not sure how that will go.”

Dr. Lehnig nods and puts some more notes into the computer. 

“She sure is lucky to have a daddy who is so on top of things,” she comments, and Tim smiles as he breathes in Charlotte’s scent. It’s a mixture of her baby shampoo, their laundry detergent, and something that’s unique to all small children. “I’ll get all of those referrals in, and you’ll be getting several phone calls over the next few weeks to set up appointments.”

“Thank you,” Tim says, and he begins to relax as Dr. Lehnig turns to them and starts making funny faces at Charlotte to make her giggle. 

“Is the thumb sucking new?” she asks, and Tim shakes his head. 

“No, she’s been doing it since I got her. I think it’s a self soothing thing. I … didn’t want to discourage it, not when she’s been through so much.”

“Good idea, though her dentist might have something to say about it.”

Tim grimaces, and adds ‘dentist’ to his list of places to establish care for Charlotte. 

The rest of the appointment continues in much the same vein, and Tim is feeling relieved and feels like he isn’t doing a completely terrible job of being a parent when the nurse brings in a tray of vaccines and Charlotte loses her shit.

“What the fuck?” Tim wonders briefly, and then he’s too busy trying to hold onto a screaming, writhing Charlotte to talk. 

Dr. Lehnig quickly sends the nurse out of the room, but Charlotte has already been set off and will not be calmed down. 

“Has she done anything like this before?” Dr. Lehnig asks, and Tim shakes his head as he tries to wrap his arms around Charlotte, because she’s had tantrums before, but this seems very, very different. She’s kicking and screaming, her little fists pounding against his chest as she sobs, and Tim doesn’t know what’s happening or how to fix it. 

He can hear what sounds like the word ‘no’ being repeated over and over and over again, and his heart breaks as he realizes what’s happening. 

“When… when she was taken away from her mother,” he whispers, and he can barely hear himself think when Charlotte buries her head in his neck and wails. “She was a drug addict. Lots of needles, all over the place and... and she saw her mom overdose, so... I… she must be remembering.”

Dr. Lehnig nods, and then hovers as Tim rubs Charlotte’s back and makes comforting noises. She calms slowly, her sobs quieting to little hiccuping breaths, her arms and legs relaxing. Her eyes are still wide, though, and she keeps looking at the door like she's worried that the man with the needles will come back. 

“Hey,” he whispers, and he doesn’t know what to say because she needs to get her vaccines, but he wants to reassure her that there won’t be any more needles for today, at least. “No more needles, baby. No needles today, I promise. I promise, Charlotte.”

Charlotte looks up at him with wet, wide eyes, and Tim holds her even closer. 

“I think the PTSD diagnosis was spot on,” Dr. Lehnig whispers, and Tim nods. “And I’ll put a rush on the referral to a child psychologist. We should be able to give her something to help with the anxiety and PTSD today, though, if you’d like. We can start with a low dose of Sertraline and see how she responds to it.”

“Okay,” Tim whispers, because he’s willing to try anything if it can help take some of the anxiety and fear away from his baby girl. 

“We’ll need to come up with a plan for the vaccines, though,” she continues, and Tim nods again, because he knows they do, he just doesn’t know how he’s going to stand by and watch while Charlotte has to face the needles. 

“Is there any way we can put her under for it?” Tim asks, and Dr. Lehnig pauses and bites her lip. 

“We do, in some cases, have to use sedatives for children on the autism spectrum, though usually it’s reserved for procedures like filling teeth or stitches, things like that. But we could do a small dose of Midazolam to help her calm down next time. I wouldn’t recommend it today, because she’s already so worked up, but we can make a follow up appointment to discuss your options.”

“Thank you,” Tim says, and he turns his attention back to Charlotte as Dr. Lehnig gets everything entered into the computer. 

By the time he’s walking out of the office, prescription for Charlotte’s PTSD and anxiety in hand, as well as printouts for each of her diagnoses, phone numbers and contact information for all of her referrals, he’s exhausted.

He straps a now-sleeping Charlotte into her carseat, and then sits in the front of his truck as he pulls out his phone and sends a text to Lucy. 

Tim: Charlotte’s appointment was … rough. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’m so sorry, Tim. Do we need to reschedule dinner?

Tim almost texts and says yes, but… he thinks that Charlotte would actually really love to see Lucy, and honestly, so would he. 

Tim: No, we don't need to reschedule. I’m excited, and so is Charlotte. We’ll pick you up at 7, if that’s still OK. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Perfect. See you then. 

Tim smiles, locks his phone, and puts the truck into gear. 

He thinks that he and Charlotte both deserve a nap before getting ready for dinner. 

Chapter Text

“You can't always judge people by the things they done. You got to judge them by what they are doing now.”

― Kate DiCamillo, Because of Winn-Dixie

Lucy knows that there’s no need to be nervous, just like there’s no need to dress up (she’s going to dinner with Tim and his daughter, for goodness sakes, it can’t be that fancy), but she still goes through every outfit in her closet before settling on something comfortable but cute (and a little, tiny bit more revealing than what she’d normally wear to school). She ends up choosing a butter yellow romper with a cute v-neck that reveals just enough without being too much. She pairs it with a light brown cardigan and strappy sandals, and finishes the outfit off with a pair of silver hoop earrings. 

She lets her hair fall free around her face, shining and wavy, and adds just a touch of gloss to her lips.

She sighs and runs her hands down her stomach when she’s done, smoothing the soft material, and eyes herself critically in the mirror. 

She doesn’t have long, she knows. Tim had texted her that they were on their way just a few minutes ago, and his apartment is only fifteen minutes away from hers, so she doesn’t really have time to change, but what if … 

There’s a sharp, rapid knock on the door, and then a smaller, softer one, and Lucy smiles fondly into the mirror as she imagines Charlotte wanting to knock on the door just like her daddy.

“Coming!” she calls, and she glances at herself in the mirror one more time before walking out of her bedroom and to the door. She opens it, and her heart races when she sees Tim standing there in dark, well-fitting jeans and a blue button down. 

He’s unfairly handsome, really. 

Charlotte squeaks from her place in Tim’s arms, and then holds her hands out to Lucy. 

Tim chuckles and hands the girl over, and Lucy sighs as Charlotte wraps her legs around her waist, and her arms around her neck as she hugs her. 

“Hey, baby,” she murmurs, and who is she kidding? Dating Tim isn’t going to change how she views Charlotte in the classroom. She’s already hopelessly in love with the little girl, and there’s no going back. “How was the doctor?”

Charlotte screams into Lucy’s shoulder, and Lucy looks up at Tim in shock and alarm. 

He winces. “Please don’t mention the ‘D’ word. It’s a sensitive topic right now.”

Lucy nods and then reaches to grab her purse before closing the door. Her arms are full of Charlotte, though, so Tim gently takes her purse and loops it over his own shoulder. Lucy grins at him, her eyes soft, and he shrugs. 

“I can pull off a purse, Lucy. I look fabulous.”

“You do,” Lucy agrees, because he does, literally all of the time. “So, where are we going?”

Tim hums and reaches out to put a hand on the small of her back as he guides her through the hallways of the apartment and then outside into the sunshine. 

“It’s a surprise.”

Lucy normally hates surprises, but she finds that she’s actually excited as she helps buckle Charlotte into her car seat. She makes sure the chest clip is level with her underarms and that the straps are just tight enough, and then smiles at the little girl and hands her the stuffed bunny that’s lying on the bench before closing the door. 

Once she’s finished she turns around only to run into Tim’s chest. He wraps his arms loosely around her waist and stares at her, affection in his gaze. 

“I want to kiss you,” he whispers, and Lucy very much wants that, too, but… 

“You said you were going to kiss me goodnight when you dropped me off, mister,” she says, poking him in the chest playfully. “And I fully plan on collecting on that promise.

Tim draws in a deep breath and then nods as he closes his eyes. Lucy wants to tease him, just a little bit, so she leans forward and kisses right under his jaw. It’s just a quick press of dry lips against skin, but Lucy can feel a whole body shudder run through Tim as she pulls away. 

“You… are dangerous,” he mutters, and Lucy grins as she walks backwards around the front of the truck to get to the passenger seat. Her hips are swaying and her curls are bouncing, and she bites her lips as she meets Tim’s gaze. 

She doesn’t respond, but the second she’s climbed into the truck and shut her door, Tim is sliding a hand around her waist and pulling her close to him. He drops his head to her neck, his lips ghosting over her skin as he breathes her in. His nose brushes a path from her neck to her ear, and then he’s whispering, his breath puffing hotly over her face. 

“Two can play at this game, Lucy.”

She whimpers, and then Tim bites the lobe of her ear gently as he pulls away and fastens his seatbelt. 

He grins over her as if he isn’t the reason she can’t focus to get her own seatbelt on, and then he reaches to do it for her, his fingers trailing across her hip and stomach as he clicks it in. 

Lucy takes a shuddering breath in and then leans back against the seat, trying desperately to control her pounding heartbeat as Tim eases the truck onto the road. 

The drive is short, and Lucy spends most of it making funny faces at Charlotte in the mirror (once she can breathe again), and when they pull up outside the restaurant Tim made reservations at, she smiles and reaches out to take his hand, squeezing it once before letting it drop. 

“Thank you for taking me out tonight,” she says, and Tim hums as he leans over and kisses her cheek. 

“Thank you for agreeing to go on a date with me. And Charlotte,” he adds, as the little girl squeals and tosses her bunny into the front seat. “We can’t forget about Charlotte.”

Lucy chuckles as she undoes her seatbelt. “No, we certainly can not.”

Tim unbuckles Charlotte and settles her on his hip and then walks around the side of the truck to take Lucy’s hand in his own. 

“Is this OK?” he asks, and Lucy nods, her cheeks stained a light pink as he entwines their fingers. 

They walk into the restaurant together, and Lucy lets her eyes wander as Tim checks them in. The hostess grabs menus and tells them to follow her, and as they walk Lucy turns to Tim and smiles. 

“This place is nice,” she says, and it is. It’s the kind of nice that you would bring a family to; it’s comfortable, and not like any other restaurant Lucy has been to on a first date, which she finds she likes. The dim atmosphere, the romantic music… it always puts too much pressure on the date. But here, where Charlotte is given crayons and told she can draw on the table, it’s nice. 

It’s easy and comfortable, like her whole relationship with Tim. 

Tim pulls out Lucy’s chair for her and then settles Charlotte into her booster seat, and then he reaches for the crayons with a lopsided smile. He hands several to Charlotte, and then offers the rest to Lucy. 

She takes them with a besotted smile, and the three of them draw pictures together as they wait for their waiter. 

It’s easily the best first date she’s ever been on. 

The food is good, the company even better, and by the time their waiter asks if they want dessert, Lucy’s stomach hurts from laughing and her cheeks are sore from smiling. 

“No thank you,” Tim says, and then he slides the waiter his debit card to pay for the meal. He leans over and whispers into Lucy’s ear, “Date’s not over yet.”

She doesn’t know what else he has planned for them, but she’s eager to find out. 

___________

They don’t get back in the truck after dinner, and Lucy is confused but she trusts Tim. He grabs Charlotte around the waist and lifts the little girl onto his shoulders, and then holds onto her legs with one hand while taking Lucy’s hand in the other. He entwines their fingers, and nods toward across the street. 

“When I first got back from my last tour,” he begins, and Lucy hangs onto his every word as they cross the street and then start walking down the sidewalk. “I went on a lot of walks. It was a good way to get out of the house and clear my head, and one day I found this path. It leads down to the beach. The path is nice and quiet, and it’s beautiful. And, once we get down to the beach, there’s this little cart that sells the best ice cream you’ve ever tasted.”

“That sounds nice,” Lucy says, and she leans into his side as they walk. 

“It is. There’s so many beautiful parts of this little town. I originally wasn’t going to stay long, you know. My apartment lease is month to month.”

“Oh?” Lucy asks, and she tries not to let her uncertainty show as she listens to him talk. 

I wasn’t going to stay long … 

“Yeah, but then… then Charlotte happened, and this is a quiet little town, you know? Close to the beach, nice schools, lots of places to play and go as a family. It’s… everything I didn’t know I needed.”

Lucy smiles and buries her head in Tim’s shoulder, clasping his hand in both of hers as they walk. The path is well worn but overgrown; it’s likely one that’s been here for a long time, but isn’t very popular with tourists who just come for the beach. 

“I love this town,” she says, and she sighs as she watches the way the sun streams through the leaves, casting dancing patterns on the ground as the wind blows through the trees. “I came here when I graduated. I wanted to get far away from my parents, and this seemed like the place to do it. I was going to teach here for a year and then maybe move out of state, but it has a way of sucking you in, you know?”

Tim chuckles and glances up at where Charlotte is holding onto his hair as she watches the scenery with wide eyes. 

“I do know. It’s… it’s a little magical,” he admits, and Charlotte tugs on his hair and makes a little noise as a bird flies out of a tree and across the path. 

“Yeah,” Lucy agrees, but she’s not looking at the trees. 

She’s looking at Tim and Charlotte. 

They walk for a long time, talking and enjoying nature, and after a while the dirt path turns to sand and the trees thin, and the trail lets them out on a sparsely popular section of beach. Tim points in the distance to a little cart by the lifeguard station that’s surrounded by families and little kids. 

“Seriously, the best ice cream,” he says, and Lucy grins as they walk slowly, leisurely, along the sand. About halfway there Charlotte wants down, and once her little feet are on the sand, Lucy and Tim each take a hand and swing her between them. She shrieks in happiness, giggling madly each time she flies through the air, and Lucy finds herself wanting every day to be like this day. 

When they reach the cart Lucy is just as excited as Charlotte, and she reads each flavor off carefully as Charlotte peruses the options. In the end Charlotte ends up choosing strawberry, and Lucy picks mint chocolate chip. She teases Tim endlessly about his vanilla, and they laugh and smile as they walk along the beach. They stay far away from the water, because Tim glares at it like it might come and bite him in the ass when he’s not looking, and Lucy senses that there’s a story there but she doesn’t want to push, not when they’re having such a good time. 

She thinks her favorite moment, by far, is watching the sun set over the horizon while Tim holds her hand. Charlotte bounces along beside them, her fingers in her mouth and her eyes wide open, taking in the various colors dancing across the sky, and Lucy feels perfectly at peace. 

“Best first date ever,” she says, later that evening when they’re outside of Lucy’s apartment door. Tim has Charlotte on his hip, so he can’t take her into his arms like he wants to, but he does press her gently up against the wall outside of her door, covering her body with his and leaning down to press his nose into her hair, breathing in her scent. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asks, because he’s nothing if not a gentleman.

Lucy nods, and her heart is thumping in anticipation as Tim cups her cheek with the hand he’s not using to support Charlotte. He leans down, and his breath caresses her face, warm and smelling like vanilla ice cream, and then his lips are pressing against hers, soft, sweet, and barely there. 

Lucy makes a desperate noise in her throat and surges up to kiss him properly (or, as properly as she can with a kindergartener between them). She presses her chest to his chest, her hips to his hips, and curls her fingers in his hair and holds on tight.

Tim runs his tongue along the seam of her lips, but he doesn’t deepen the kiss. Instead he pulls back, and then laughs, a sweet, soft laugh, when Charlotte leans forward and kisses Lucy, too, a quick peck on the cheek. 

Lucy laughs and kisses Charlotte’s cheek, too, and then she waves as they walk away.

She leans up against her door, a lovesick smile on her face, for a long time before unlocking it and going inside.

She can’t wait to spend Christmas evening with the Bradfords in a few days time. 

Chapter Text

“Love, as we have already discussed, is a powerful, wonderful, ridiculous thing, capable of moving mountains.”

― Kate DiCamillo, Despereaux - Tale of Despereaux

Tim practically floats through the next few days. 

He had kissed Lucy.

And she kissed him back.

Their date had been amazing, and Tim goes to bed every night thinking about Lucy’s smile, and her laugh. 

He wants to call her, or to invite her over, but he knows that it’s good for both of them to spend some time apart. They’ve only known each other for a few weeks, and while Tim feels a pull to her that he’s never felt before, he wants to do this right, and that means taking things slowly, as much as it pains him.

And… well, it’s nice, spending time with just Charlotte, he has to admit. Every since he’d met his little girl, things had been… insane. They hadn’t really had any time together, just the two of them, when things were calm. 

So, they spend the two days leading up to Christmas just the two of them. 

They go out for ice cream, and play at the park, and watch movies together. Tim makes all of Charlotte’s favorite foods and he even lets her open one of her presents early. 

It’s adorable, and a little bit heartbreaking, to see her confusion when she wakes up on Christmas Eve and just stands in the middle of the living room, sucking on her fingers and staring at the presents under the tree. Tim had stayed up well past midnight wrapping them, and none of them are wrapped particularly well, but he’d been excited to see Charlotte’s reaction regardless. 

He’d been expecting smiles and sparkling eyes and grabby hands. 

He hadn’t been expecting confusion.

She turns to him, her fingers slipping out of her mouth, and points to the presents under the tree. 

Tim kneels down in front of her and puts a hand on her waist, gently guiding her toward the presents. 

“These are for you, for Christmas,” he explains gently, and Charlotte stares in confusion for a minute longer before walking over to the TV stand and grabbing a DVD case. She brings it back to Tim and points, and he nods, smiling as he kisses her forehead. 

“Yeah, like in The Grinch. Except no mean old grinch is gonna steal your presents, baby girl. These are for you! Tomorrow is Christmas, and we’re going to open presents together, OK?”

Charlotte nods and then plops on the floor in front of the tree, the DVD case still in her hands as she stares at the lights and the brightly colored wrapping paper in awe. 

And, well, Tim can’t really be expected to say no when she reaches for one of the boxes and gives Tim an inquiring look.

“Just one,” he says, and then Charlotte’s confusion is back and he has to show her how to tear the wrapping paper. 

It’s heartbreaking and yet the most adorable thing he’s ever seen all at once, and he watches with soft eyes as Charlotte pushes all the wrapping paper to the side and holds up the box. She’s grinning around her fingers, and Tim can’t help himself. He takes out his phone, snaps a picture, and then sends it to Lucy as he scoots forward on the floor and helps free the baby doll from her packaging. 

Tim: [Image] I am weak. We opened a present early. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Aww! How adorable. 

Tim: She was just staring at them all in confusion, like she’s never gotten a present before. It makes me so sad that she’s never had a real Christmas. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: She has you now, Tim, and you’re a great daddy. She is so loved. 

Tim: It just breaks my heart that she’s been through so much. And the hits just keep on coming, you know? 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I know. I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do to help, but it’s going to take time. She’s already coming out of her shell and she loves you so much. You’re her safe place, Tim. 

Tim: I know. Sorry to get all depressing on Christmas Eve. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Don’t apologize. It’s ok to be upset that Charlotte hasn’t had this experience. But imagine how excited she’s going to be tomorrow! She’s going to have so much fun. 

Tim: Yeah. And speaking of tomorrow, what time are you coming over? 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Is 3 o’clock too early? 

Tim pauses and stares down at his phone. 

He wants to tell her that no time is too early. She’s welcome to come over whenever she wants. She’ll always be welcome. But he doesn’t want to freak her out. 

Tim: That's perfect. See you then. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Can’t wait. 😘

Tim smiles down at his phone like an idiot until Charlotte demands his attention. 

They spend the rest of the day playing with Charlotte’s new doll, and it’s perfect. 

___________________

Christmas morning is a disaster of wrapping paper and toys, and unending smiles and shrieks of happiness from Charlotte. The living room looks like a war zone, and Tim finds himself taking about a million pictures as Charlotte opens each toy carefully, plays with it for a bit, and then moves on to the next one. 

By the time there’s a soft knock on the door signaling Lucy’s arrival, Charlotte has fallen asleep in the middle of a pile of wrapping paper, surrounded by all of her toys. She’d spent a good twenty minutes lining them all up in a perfect circle, and then she’d crawled between them, curled up with the giant stuffed bunny Tim had bought her, and crashed. 

Tim is standing with his hands in his pockets, staring at his little girl and wondering how it’s possible to love someone so much when he hears the knock. 

His smile grows as he turns to answer the door, and he’s been so eager to see Lucy again that he hasn’t been able to sleep, but when he opens the door and sees her standing there, her hair falling in waves around her shoulders and her cheeks pink from the chill, he suddenly doesn’t know what to say or do. 

Lucy smiles and rocks back and forth on her heels, and then holds up a pristinely wrapped box and a reusable shopping bag full of food. 

“There’s more in the car,” she says, and Tim chuckles as he takes the box and steps to the side, letting her in. He leans down and kisses her on the cheek, and they’re both blushing when he pulls back.

“Wait here with Charlotte, and I’ll go grab the rest of your things,” he says, and Lucy nods, biting her lips as she hands the keys over.

“Thank you,” she whispers, and Tim smiles as he walks toward the door. 

Once everything is inside, Tim eyes the two carefully wrapped boxes on the kitchen counter, one small and one large, with curiosity. 

“For you and Charlotte,” Lucy explains, and Tim chuckles, holding up one finger before disappearing into his room. He comes back out with a small box, wrapped in red paper with a boy on top, and sets it beside the ones Lucy had brought.

“I didn’t… I wasn’t sure if it was too soon,” he explains, and then he nudges the box closer to Lucy. “But I got you something, too.”

They stand there grinning at each other like idiots for several long seconds before Tim clears his throat and breaks the silence. 

“I… uh, I’ve been looking at babysitting services, and I think I found someone I like. A college girl who has experience with children on the autism spectrum.”

“That’s good,” Lucy says, and Tim’s smile widens as he leans his hip against the kitchen counter.

He wants to reach out and pull Lucy into his arms. He wants to kiss her, and back her up against the counter and press his body to his, but he knows there’s a five-year-old sleeping less than twenty feet away. 

“It is good,” he says, and he steps closer to Lucy, reaching out to settle a hand on her hip. She steps into his space and stares up at him, eyes wide and lips parted, and Tim can’t help himself. He leans down and kisses her softly, slowly. It’s a chaste kiss, and he doesn’t try to deepen it, but feeling Lucy’s moist lips under his settles something in him. “It is good,” he continues when he pulls back, and he grins when he sees the way Lucy’s eyes are a little glazed over and unfocused. “Because I was going to ask if you want to go out with me again at some point over Winter Break. Maybe… maybe next week? Tamara and I are going to do a trial run with her watching Charlotte. We could do something simple, like go get ice cream. That way we'd be close by in case she needs us.”

Lucy hums and then swallows, her cheeks flushing as she tries to focus. 

“That… that sounds good,” she says, and Tim smiles as he flexes the hand that’s still on her hip. 

“And, if that goes well, if Charlotte likes Tamara, we can… go to dinner, or watch a movie, sometime after that.”

Lucy smiles, and she glances up at Tim through her lashes. 

Her heart is racing, all from a very chaste kiss, and she’s never felt this way before. 

She likes it, but it also scared the shit out of her. 

“I’d like that.”

“Me, too,” Tim says, and Lucy thinks they might stay that way forever, just touching and staring at each other. 

Charlotte, however, has other ideas, and they jerk apart when she starts screaming from the living room. 

Tim frowns and sighs as he runs a hand through his hair. “Nightmare,” he explains, and Lucy nods in understanding as Tim turns toward the living room. She follows him, but stands back and watches as Tim moves Charlotte’s new toys to the side, kneeling on the floor in front of her before reaching to put a hand on her shoulder. 

Charlotte is still sleeping, but she’s twitching and making little, whimpering noises, and Lucy’s heart breaks as she sees this side of the little girl’s struggle. 

She’s seen Charlotte go through lots of different, difficult things at school, but this… this is new. Watching her writhe and scream, clutched in the throes of a nightmare, is somehow worse than anything she’s seen so far.

“Hey, baby,” Tim murmurs, and he slips a hand beneath Charlotte’s head, cushioning it as she continues to kick and scream. “Hey, Charlotte. Wake up, baby. Daddy’s here. It’s gonna be OK.”

Charlotte’s eyes pop open, and they’re filled with tears. She glances back and forth between Tim and Lucy, her chest hitching as she sobs, and then she throws herself into Tim’s arms, burying her head in his neck. 

“I’ve got you, baby,” Tim murmurs, and he begins to rock her back and forth, one hand on the small of her back and one cupping her head, holding her tightly. 

Charlotte is sobbing, and Lucy can’t stand back anymore. She walks over and kneels down next to them, one of her hands joining Tim’s on Charlotte's back, and they sit there for a long time, touching Charlotte and reassuring her that everything is OK, that she’s safe, and loved, and that Daddy and Ms. Lucy are here for her. 

Charlotte’s sobs quiet down eventually, but as she stops crying, it becomes more apparent that she’s muttering something over and over and over again, though Tim and Lucy can’t quite make it out. 

“What’s that, baby?” Tim asks, and he pulls back from Charlotte a little, making a soft noise as he wipes away the tears that are clinging to her cheeks. 

Charlotte hiccups and then sticks her fingers in her mouth. Her eyes are wide and her voice is soft, quiet, barely there. 

But it’s her voice , and Tim’s heart races as she opens her lips and whispers. 

“Daddy,” she says, and then she hiccups again as she reaches out and pats his cheek with her hand. “Daddy.”

Tim’s entire heart explodes.

His chest aches and he feels his lips turning up in a smile at the same time as he begins sobbing. He knows he’s crying, silent tears slipping down his cheeks, but all he’s aware of is the little girl in his arms and the soft, sweet voice he thought he’d never hear. 

“Yeah,” he whispers, and he plants little kisses all over her cheeks and nose and forehead. “Yeah, I’m your daddy.”

Lucy lays her head on Tim’s shoulder and just watches as father and daughter hold each other. 

“Daddy,” Charlotte mutters, and Tim’s breath hitches as he holds her even closer.

He doesn’t think he’s ever heard anything as wonderful in his entire life. 

Chapter Text

“Stories are light. Light is precious in a world so dark.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Tale of Despereaux

It takes a long time to calm Charlotte down, and then when she’s calm, it takes even longer to calm Tim down. 

Lucy distracts Charlotte by putting The Grinch on TV and settling her in a pile of her toys, and then she goes to sit next to Tim, who has barely moved. 

“She said daddy,” Tim murmurs, and Lucy smiles at the reminder. 

She hates how it had come about, because watching Charlotte cry from the terror of a nightmare was hard, but hearing her say daddy over and over again as she’d clung to Tim was both heartbreaking and heartwarming.

“She did,” Lucy confirms, and she sits in the space between his legs before wrapping her arms around Tim, laying her head on his chest as they both watch Charlotte watch the TV. “She knows you’re her daddy.”

“She spoke,” Tim says, and then he’s wrapping his arms around Lucy, holding her just as tightly as she’s holding him. “Lucy, I didn’t know if she would ever speak, but she did. She called me her daddy.”

Lucy knows that Tim is just processing, and so she just holds him and lays her head on his chest, listening to his heart thump in his chest as they both watch Charlotte. 

Charlotte, who has spoken for possibly the first time in her entire life. 

“OK,” Tim says ater several long moments, and then he stands up quickly. Lucy squeaks as he takes her with him, his arms still wrapped around her waist, and they both end up laughing as they stumble around on the living room floor. Once they find their footing, though, Tim stares down at Lucy with affection in his eyes.

“OK what?” she asks, and Tim shakes his head, his hand falling to the small of her back as he pushes her toward the kitchen. 

“OK we need to do something other than sit here, or I’m going to be reduced to a puddle of feelings. We have a turkey to cook, mashed potatoes to make, and I definitely forgot to buy pie, so we’re going to have to make that from scratch.”

Charlotte’s head whips around at the mention of pie, and both Lucy and Tim laugh as she jumps off the couch and runs over to them, bouncing up and down. 

“Daddy,” she says, and Tim’s heart melts.

He’s in deep shit, he realizes, because he will do whatever she wants if she just says daddy in that soft, sweet voice of hers. 

“Yeah, baby?” he asks, and he reaches down to pick her up, settling her on his hip as they all walk into the kitchen together. 

Charlotte doesn’t seem inclined to try any other words than daddy for right now, though, and she just points.

“You want to help?” Lucy guesses, and then, remembering what had caught the little girl’s attention in the first place, she adds, “With the pie?”

Charlotte nods enthusiastically, and Tim smiles as he sets her down on the counter. He reaches into the cupboard and pulls out a bowl, which he hands to Charlotte, and then a mixing spoon. 

“I have to get the turkey in the oven,” he says, and then he passes his phone to Lucy. “I have a recipe on there for a pumpkin pie. It’s pretty easy because I buy the canned pumpkin. Can you two work on that?”

Lucy nods and takes the phone, and then, because she can, she leans up on her tiptoes and kisses him on the lips. Charlotte giggles from behind them, and Lucy smiles as she turns around and kisses her on the cheek, making a loud smacking noise as she pulls away. 

Charlotte’s blue eyes are sparkling as she holds out the bowl to Lucy. 

“Pie. Right. Do not get distracted by daddy,” she says, and she grins when she hears Tim choke behind her when she calls him daddy.

“Daddy!” Charlotte agrees, and really, how is Tim supposed to work under these conditions?

He’s easily distracted, however, when Lucy grabs her phone and navigates to YouTube. She turns on some godawful music about apples and bananas, and Tim turns around, his eyes wide and his mouth open as he listens. 

“What… is this?” he asks, and Lucy laughs while Charlotte makes noises and dances along to the music where she’s sitting on the counter. 

“Super Simple Songs. Charlotte loves them. There are some songs that actually teach things, but most are just for fun. This one technically teaches short and long vowels, but that’s a bit above her head. They're really fun and catchy, and autistic children like music. It can help them communicate and interact with others.”

“Oh,” Tim says, and he glances over at Lucy’s phone, his hands full of turkey, to make note of the name. Super Simple Songs. He can play them for Charlotte at home, too, though he has a feeling that they’re going to get stuck in his head something awful.

Lucy smiles at Tim as he leans over and kisses Charlotte on the cheek before turning back to the stove. Charlotte grins and wiggles in place on the counter, and Lucy’s heart is full of love for the man and little girl who have somehow wormed their way so thoroughly into her life. 

She wouldn’t have it any other way, though.

“OK,” she says, and she forces herself to focus on the recipe on Tim’s phone instead of on him. “We need… pumpkin puree, condensed milk, eggs, pumpkin pie spice, aaaaand…. Crust. Ooh, do we need to make the crust from scratch, too?”

Tim shakes his head and points to the refrigerator, and Lucy pats Charlotte on the hip before moving away. “Stay there, baby girl,” she says, and Charlotte nods. She’s very seriously mixing the spoon in circles in the empty bowl, her body wiggling in time with the music, and Lucy smiles fondly at her as she turns to the fridge. She finds the pumpkin puree, eggs, and the crusts in the fridge, and then Tim sets out the condensed milk and pumpkin pie spice.

“If I remember correctly, you just mix it all together,” Tim says, and Lucy glances at him with a smile before turning toward Charlotte. 

“Can I have the bowl?” she asks, and Charlotte nods and hands it over. Lucy sits it flat on the counter top and then helps Charlotte sit on her bottom on the counter, criss-cross. “Here, baby. Hold the bowl like this," she says, and she positions the bowl in Charlotte’s lap before she begins dumping the ingredients inside. Charlotte takes her spoon and sticks it in the middle, gripping it with both hands as she begins to turn it in a circle. Her little pink tongue sticks out in concentration, and Lucy finds herself just staring at the little girl. 

She’d had such a hard life. Such a hard start. But here she is, smiling, laughing, and calling Tim her daddy.

She’s come so far already, and Lucy is excited to see what the next five months of kindergarten hold for her. 

They finish making the pie filling, and Lucy ends up having to help surprisingly little. Charlotte mixes the ingredients carefully and methodically, and then presents the bowl to Lucy when she’s finished. 

“Great job!” Lucy praises, and Charlotte grins widely. 

“Daddy!” she calls, and Tim turns around, emotion clear in his eyes as stares at Charlotte on the counter, specks of pumpkin pie filling on her clothes and face, her grin so wide that her eyes are crinkled. 

“I see, baby,” he murmurs, and he finishes washing and drying his hands before walking over and kissing Charlotte on the head. “Good job. Want to help me pour it into the crust?”

Charlotte nods, and together she and Tim split the filling between the two crusts. Lucy watches (and takes pictures on her phone to send to Tim later), and then leans back against the counter as she watches Tim put the pies in the oven on the rack above the turkey. 

“What else can we do?” she asks, and Charlotte nods eagerly, scooting to the edge of the counter and clapping her hands together. 

Tim smiles and walks up to them, wrapping an arm around Lucy’s waist while he reaches his hand up to brush a spot of pumpkin pie filling off of Charlotte’s cheek. 

“I heard something about famous mashed potatoes,” he says, and Lucy grins, leaning up and pressing a chaste kiss to Tim’s chin. 

“They’re the best,” she confirms. She’s reaching for the bag of ingredients she’d brought then Charlotte’s eyes fall on the presents on the counter, and Lucy watches with a growing smile as Charlotte’s eyes widen. She sticks two fingers in her mouth and then points, bouncing on her bottom on the counter.

“Oh, yeah!” Lucy says, and she ducks out from under Tim’s hand to grab the boxes. “I forgot. I brought a present for you, Charlotte.”

Charlotte stares in wonder as Lucy takes the big box, wrapped in Frozen themed wrapping paper, and sets it on the counter in front of her. The little girl points to herself and waits, and Lucy suddenly understands what Tim had meant when he’d texted her that morning. 

She suddenly understands how heartbreaking it is to watch a five year old be confused about presents. 

Most five year olds wake up on Christmas and they know that the presents are for them. They understand Christmas and presents and love, and watching Charlotte not quite know what to do with the present Lucy had brought her makes her want to hug the little girl and shower her in even more love. 

“For you, baby girl,” she murmurs, and then she takes Charlotte’s hand in her own, showing her how to grab and tear the wrapping paper. 

Charlotte giggles as she tears the paper off, and then she looks up at Lucy in confusion when it’s completely unwrapped. 

“I know it doesn’t look like all of the fun toys your daddy bought you,” Lucy begins, but she’s cut off when Charlotte grins and points to Tim. 

“Daddy,” she says, and Lucy and Tim both laugh, because Charlotte’s pride over her new word is adorable.

“Yes, daddy,” Lucy confirms, and she smirks up at Tim, who is standing behind her, before turning back to Charlotte. “It’s a tablet. I downloaded a bunch of games, including learning games, on it. It’s… another way to introduce her to the things she needs to learn. Plus, kids love them.”

Tim nods and then clicks on the Super Simple Songs app, laughing when Charlotte makes an excited noise and then bends over the tablet. She grips onto the silicone, child-proof cover, and hauls it onto her lap as she scrolls through the different songs. 

She looks up and makes a noise, though neither Lucy or Tim are sure what she means, but Lucy smiles and makes her best guess.

“You can pick any one you want, Charlotte,” she says, and Charlotte grins as she uses her middle finger to click on one of the icons. Tim chuckles as she begins wiggling and dancing in place to the music, and then turns to Lucy.

“Don’t I get a present, too?”

Lucy smiles up at him and then reaches for the smaller box. She presses it to Tim’s chest, and her cheeks are pink but she’s grinning as Tim begins to open it. 

“It’s… just a reminder, on the days where you’re feeling particularly down on yourself.”

Tim drops the wrapping paper to the counter and then opens the box. He chuckles softly as he lifts the gift out of the box, but his laugh sounds a little wet and hesitant. 

He turns the mug around in his hands and holds it up, smiling at Lucy as she takes a picture of him with her phone. 

World’s Best Daddy, the mug proudly proclaims.

“Thank you,” he whispers, and Lucy nods, taking his hand in hers and making him set the mug down on the counter before she stands on her tiptoes, pressing her lips gently to his. 

“You are a great daddy,” she whispers, and Tim sighs against her lips, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her close to him. He bends down and kisses her again, longer this time, and they melt into each other, hands gripping tight and bodies pressed together from head to toe. Tim is just brushing his tongue along Lucy’s lips and she’s biting back a moan as she opens to him when Charlotte makes a noise from the counter. 

Tim and Lucy break apart to see her holding out her hands to them, her lips pressed together in an adorable request for a kiss. Lucy reaches out and takes one of her hands while Tim takes the other, and then Charlotte giggles madly as they both kiss her cheeks at the same time. 

She’s squished between them, holding their hands, her cheeks pink and her lips turned up in a smile, and Tim sighs in happiness as he holds the two most important women in the world close to him. 

When he pulls back his eyes are a little moist and his chest feels heavy, but in a good way. 

He clears his throat, and then turns to grab Lucy’s present, the little box he’d put down next to hers earlier. 

“This is for you,” he says, and Lucy smiles as she takes the box and pulls on the ribbon. She takes the ribbon and sets it on the counter, and Charlotte grabs it, playing with it as she cranes her head so that she can see inside of the box. She and Lucy both make a noise when she takes the top off, and Lucy’s hand flies to her mouth, covering her gasp as she stares down at the necklace nestled inside of the velvet. 

“Tim…” she whispers, and Tim smiles, reaching inside and pulling the necklace out. 

“Can I?” he asks, and Lucy nods, gathering her hair in her hands and turning around so that Tim can put it on her. The chain is a sterling silver that it’s almost white, and the opal that falls from the chain and nestles perfectly between her breasts shines iridescent blue when she turns in the light of the kitchen. 

“It’s beautiful,” she whispers, and Tim smiles, leaning down and kissing the skin of her neck right above where the chain sits. 

“Merry Christmas, Lucy,” he murmurs, and Lucy turns around in his arms. 

“Merry Christmas, Tim.”

“Daddy,” Charlotte adds, and Tim laughs as he pulls her into the hug, too. 

The night isn’t even over, and it’s already the best Christmas he’s had in years.

Chapter Text

“Magic is always impossible.... It begins with the impossible and ends with the impossible and is impossible in between. That is why it's magic.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Magician's Elephant

Charlotte’s attention is completely captured by her new tablet, and Lucy eventually ends up moving her off of the counter and onto the floor, out of the way but still within her and Tim’s sight.

It takes them a few hours, and eventually Charlotte gets bored and wanders back into the living room to play with her new toys. Lucy watches her with a smile as she finishes the potatoes and helps Tim with first the stuffing, then the green bean casserole, and finally the fruit and veggie trays. 

“I have no idea if Charlotte will actually eat any of what we cooked,” he says when Lucy raises her eyebrow at the plate of chicken nuggets he sticks into the microwave. “We’re going to try, but I need a backup if we don’t want a meltdown.”

Lucy laughs, and leans into Tim’s side while they wait for the nuggets. 

Everything comes together seamlessly, the microwave beeping at the same time as the oven timer rings. Tim takes the turkey out while Lucy sets the plate of nuggets on top of the stove to keep them warm, and then they work together to place the food around the table. 

Tim grins as he holds up a bottle of wine and two wine glasses, and Lucy smiles and shrugs, as if to say why not?

They call Charlotte to the table, and Lucy helps her climb into the chair that has a little booster seat in it while Tim puts a tiny amount of each thing on a plate for her. He makes sure that the different foods don’t touch, and then sets it in front of Charlotte, along with a spoon and a fork. 

“Watch,” he tells Lucy, and they both watch as Charlotte bypasses the fork and spoon and starts picking at the food with her fingers. She makes faces at some of it, and Lucy raises an eyebrow as she looks up at Tim. “She does that to test the textures, I think. She won’t eat anything slimy, so the green bean casserole is probably out.”

Lucy watches in fascination as Charlotte grabs a piece of turkey and begins munching on it, and then laughs when she sticks out her tongue and lets it fall back to the plate while making a face.

“That’s a no on turkey, then,” she says, and Tim laughs as he pours them each a glass of wine. 

They take a seat on either side of Charlotte, and Tim makes sure to pass each container to Lucy before dishing up any for himself. 

“Thank you for having me over, Tim,” Lucy says, and Tim smiles at her over Charlotte’s head as she pours gravy over her mashed potatoes and turkey. 

“You’re welcome,” he says, and he’s curious about why she’s not with family, but he doesn’t want to push. 

Lucy tells him, anyway.

“I haven’t really spoken to my parents much since I started teaching. They had… a whole other career path planned out for me, but they forgot to get my input before they planned out my entire life. I changed my major in college to early childhood education, and… well.”

“Well, it’s their loss,” he says softly. “And our gain. We’re happy to have Ms. Lucy with us for Christmas, huh, Charlotte?”

Charlotte glances up, pumpkin pie smeared around her lips, and grins brightly as she chirps, “Woo-cy!”

Lucy drops her fork as she turns toward the little girl, and she knows that Charlotte knows what she’s done, because the little girl is grinning widely as she sticks her tongue out of her mouth, trying to get at the pumpkin pie bits on her cheeks and chin. 

“Woo-cy! Daddy!”

Tim glances at Lucy, and she feels tears fill her eyes at the wonder in his expression. 

“Hey, baby, who’s that?” he asks, and he points to Lucy. 

Charlotte glances back and forth between them, and then points at Tim. “Daddy.”

“Yeah, I’m daddy. Who is that?” he asks again, and Lucy waits, her heart in her throat, as Charlotte turns back toward her. 

“Who am I, baby?” she whispers, and Charlotte grins, leaning forward and smacking a pumpkin pie kiss on Lucy’s cheek.

“Woo-cy.”

Lucy laughs and reaches up to wipe tears from her eyes before leaning over and hugging Charlotte tightly. 

“That’s right. I’m Lucy.”

“Woo-cy,” Charlotte says again, and Lucy suddenly understands why Tim had been unable to process when Charlotte had first called him daddy.

It’s a heady feeling, hearing her name pass the lips of a little girl who they’d thought might never speak. 

Lucy kisses her on the head, and then slides a second piece of pie onto her plate when Tim isn’t looking. 

He catches her, and they all laugh together as Charlotte eats the pie with her fingers. 

______________

After dinner, Tim helps Charlotte dress in leggings and a light jacket, and then he and Lucy each take one of the little girl’s hands as they walk out of the apartment. 

The sun has already set, and Lucy keeps glancing at Tim in curiosity as they step off of the sidewalk outside of his apartment and cross the street. 

“Where are we going?” she asks, again, but Tim just smiles and pretends to zip his lips. 

“You’ll see,” he says, and then, when Charlotte tries to run ahead for the tenth time, he grabs the little girl around the waist and swings her onto his shoulders. She squeals and then grabs onto his hair, and Tim winces but doesn’t pull away. He grabs her around on ankle, and then reaches out with his free hand to reach for Lucy’s. He entwines their fingers, and then grins as he watches the various Christmas lights flicker across her face as they walk. 

They turn a corner and walk about half a block, and then Tim tugs on her hand, bringing her attention to the street absolutely decked out with Christmas lights. All of the houses are decorated, the trees draped in light, and there are huge inflatable snowmen, Santa Clauses, and reindeer everywhere. Charlotte’s eyes widen when she sees them, and she shrieks and points as she bounces on Tim’s shoulders. 

Tim smiles up at her, and then down at Lucy as he squeezes her hand. 

“I used to do this with my mom,” he says, and his heart thumps painfully in his chest as he remembers. “Genny and I… Genny is my little sister, by the way. We used to go out on Christmas night and look at all the lights. My dad… he would get drunk after Christmas dinner, without fail, so mom would take us out to walk the streets. We would try to find the most spectacular, the best decorated house. Genny and I made it a bit of a competition, actually. We would see who could find the best house, and then my mom would be the judge.”

Lucy watches Tim and Charlotte more than she watches the lights, and she smiles softly at them both. Charlotte is in awe of all the lights, the different colors dancing in her bright blue eyes as she tries to take it all in. 

Tim is smiling softly, though a little bit sadly, and Lucy thinks she already knows what his answer is going to be before she even asks the question. 

“Is your mom…?”

Tim turns to her and kisses her on the head.

“She’s gone. Cancer, twelve year ago. But… sometimes I still do this on Christmas. I walk, or I drive, and I look at the lights and remember her.”

“That sounds nice,” Lucy murmurs, and Tim nods as they round another corner. 

Charlotte squeals and points, and Tim and Lucy follow her finger to see a house that has their lights set up to flash in time with a song. They pause and watch, and Charlotte squeaks along with the song. Tim doesn’t know how the homeowners managed it, but it’s easily the best house he’s seen all night. 

“I pick this one,” he says, and Lucy makes an idnigant noise. 

“How are we supposed to find one that beats this?” she asks, and she waves her hand toward the house as the music and lights start all over again. 

Tim just shrugs. His lips are turned up in a teasing smile as he bumps Lucy’s hip with his own.  

“Hey, just because I picked it first…”

Lucy rolls her eyes and then tugs on Tim’s arm to get him moving again. 

“Alright, Charlotte, let’s find a house that’s even cooler than the one daddy picked.”

“Daddy!” Charlotte agrees, and Tim’s heart melts as he glances up at Charlotte’s unruly curls and sparkling eyes. 

He reaches out a hand and Lucy grasps it, shaking it twice, as he rearranges his expression into something solemn. 

“May the best person win.”

“Oh, I will,” Lucy promises, and then she entwines their fingers again as they continue walking. 

______________

In the end Lucy and Charlotte don’t manage to find a house that beats the one with musical lights, but Lucy just shrugs and grins up at Tim as he gloats about his win. 

“We’ll beat you next year,” she promises, and then she sucks in a breath when she realizes what she’s said. 

Next year. 

Tim, however, just smiles softly down at her as he helps Charlotte take her jacket off. 

“It’s a date,” he says, and Lucy blushes as he leans down and kisses her on the cheek. “Want to watch a Christmas movie with us?” he asks, and Lucy nods, eager to extend their night together. “Go pick one with Charlotte. I have Netflix, Hulu, and Disney+. I’ll be right in.”

Lucy nods and takes Charlotte’s hand, and then leads her into the living room. She settles the little girl on the couch and then sits next to her, leaving room for Tim in the corner as she grabs the controller. 

They end up settling on A Christmas Carol, and Charlotte curls into Lucy’s side, sticking her fingers in her mouth and watching with wide eyes as the movie begins playing. 

Tim comes in seconds later, two glasses of wine and one of hot cocoa, and he curls into the corner of the couch before holding out his arm. Lucy cuddles into him, and then Charlotte cuddles into her, and it’s easily the most perfect Christmas Lucy has ever had. 

______________

Charlotte falls asleep before the movie is over, and Tim picks her up carefully, carrying her to her room and tucking her in. 

When he comes back into the living room, Lucy is just finishing folding the blanket they’d used, and she stands up and walks toward Tim as he walks toward her. They meet in the middle of his living room, and Tim takes her into his arms, holding her close and rocking back and forth as he surveys the mess of toys on the floor, and the dishes filling his sink in the kitchen. 

“Best Christmas ever,” he says, and Lucy nods against his chest in agreement. She lets out a huge yawn, and then Tim asks, quiet and hesitant, “Do you want to stay the night?”

Lucy pulls back and glances up at Tim, her eyes wide. 

“N-not that I’m, like, expecting anything. Just because it’s so late. You can sleep on the couch, if you want,” Tim adds, and Lucy stands on her tiptoes, pressing her lips to his to cut off his rambling. 

“I want to,” she says, and Tim smiles. “I do, but… maybe not this time? How about... how about you ask me again, soon, and I promise I’ll say yes.”

“OK,” Tim whispers, and then he leans down, kissing her again. 

Lucy laughs and pulls away, and Tim helps her gather her things before walking her toward the door. 

“I’ll see you soon?” he asks, and Lucy nods. 

“Ice cream next week, right?”

Tim nods and then kisses her again. 

And then again, just because he can. 

Lucy laughs and pushes on his chest as she backs up into the hallway.

“See you soon, Tim. Merry Christmas.”

Tim smiles and leans against the door as he watches her walk backwards down the hall. 

“Merry Christmas, Lucy.”

Chapter Text

“Have you, in truth, ever seen something so heartbreakingly lovely? What are we to make of a world where stars shine bright in the midst of so much darkness and gloom?”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Magician's Elephant

Tim picks her up for their third date on New Year’s Eve. He looks positively dashing in tight, dark wash jeans and a dark blue, from fitting long-sleeved henley. His hair is freshly cut, the top still long enough to tangle her fingers in but the sides faded out to almost nothing. 

He’s grinning and holding a bouquet of roses, and Lucy is honestly a little bit in love with him. 

“Come in,” she says, and she accepts both the roses and a soft kiss as Tim walks inside of her apartment and closes the door. 

He’s never been to her place, and he takes a second to look around while Lucy finds a vase for the roses. It’s a studio apartment, with a large kitchen/living room area filled with comfy looking couches and chairs. The back corner is dedicated to Lucy’s bed, a large, four-poster monstrosity that looks far too comfortable for Tim to not be able to stay the night with her. 

Lucy is smiling and blushing a little bit as she trims the roses and sets them in a vase. 

“These are beautiful, Tim. Thank you.”

Tim shrugs and walks over, wrapping his arms around her and letting them hang loosely around her waist. He lets his eyes roam up and down her body, lingering on the way her green dress hugs her hips and her breasts. It’s a wrap-around dress and it ties at the waist, and Tim makes a considering noise as he plays with the bow.

“You’re beautiful,” he counters, and Lucy rolls her eyes fondly as she leans up on her tiptoes and kisses him. He deepens it immediately, his arms tightening around her and pulling her flush against him. He coaxes her lips open and then turns them, pressing her up against the counter and moving one hand up to cup her jaw as he kisses her deeply, passionately. 

Too passionately, if they’re going to make their reservation on time. 

“And you’re going to make us late if we don’t get out of here,” Lucy says, pulling back from the kiss though not from Tim’s arms. 

“We could skip dinner,” Tim says, his eyes flickering toward her bed, and she’s tempted. She’s so tempted.

“This is the second time, if I’m keeping track right, that you’ve tried to get me into bed, Mr. Bradford,” she says, and she kisses his cheek as she dances out of his arms. She grabs her purse and a cardigan, and Tim sighs as he leans back against the counter. 

“And this is twice that you’ve rejected me. My feelings are going to get hut, Lucy,” he murmurs, though the playful glint in his eye tells Lucy he’s not serious.

Lucy takes his hand and hauls him out of her apartment, because her self control is only so strong and she’s one heated look from shoving him into her bed and paying Tamara extra to watch Charlotte overnight. 

Once they’re in the relative safety of her apartment hallway, she pushes him against the wall and presses one hand to his chest, holding him there, while the trails the other across his collarbone and his neck. 

She leans forward, kissing just behind his ear, and then whispers, “Ask me again after dinner.”

Tim swallows hard as she steps away from him, her eyes gleaming with happiness and something more as she walks backward down the hallway. 

He watches her, eyes wide and mouth open, for several long seconds before he’s able to stand and join her. 

Lucy giggles as he jogs to catch up, and then takes her hand and entwines their fingers as they walk into the ever darkening sky. 

“I’ll hold you to that,” he murmurs, and Lucy glances up at him, smiling as he leads her toward his truck.

_______________

Their first date without Charlotte had gone wonderfully, and so Lucy has no reason to believe that dinner with Tim — just Tim — won’t be the same. Charlotte had taken to Tamra immediately, and she’d had so much fun playing with the college student that she’d frowned when Tim and Lucy had returned from their brief outing for ice cream two days previously.

Tim had promised her that Tamara would be back soon and she’d seemed happy enough, and then they’d both talked with her about when she’d be available for a longer gig. 

“I’m so glad Charlotte likes her,” Tim says as they settle down at their table. 

The restaurant is dimly lit and fancy, but not too extravagant. It’s cozy, each table far enough apart that there’s privacy, and there’s a small candle lit in the middle of their table. 

“Me, too,” Lucy says, and not only because it means that she and Tim can go out just the two of them. She’s glad Charlotte likes Tamara because she should have more people she loves and cares about in her life. “They were so cute when we came home — uh, when we got back to your house the other night. And Tamara was working on her letters with her, which earned her A+ Babysitter status.”

“She loves those magnets,” Tim says. “Thank you, again, for helping me come up with Christmas present ideas.”

“You’re welcome,” Lucy murmurs, and Tim reaches a hand out, putting it over hers gently on the top of the table. They stare at each for a long moment, each of them smiling softly and a little bit goofily, until they’re interrupted by their waiter stopping by the table to take their drink order. 

Tim orders them both wine, and they sip it while talking and laughing and holding hands on top of the table. 

Dinner flows easily after that.

Tim had been a little bit worried that it would be weird, since they’d already spent so much time together, but it’s not. It’s comfortable and easy, and the conversation and wine both flow liberally as they order and then eat their food. 

“And then, Gerald jumped up onto the reading table and wouldn’t get off. That was the day that Mr. Grey banned the zoo from bringing goats to visit when we have guest speakers,” she says, and Tim laughs loudly as he leans back in his chair, his eyes sparkling. He watches Lucy’s cheeks flush as she tells her story enthusiastically, and he feels his stomach do something funny as she runs her ankle against his under the table. 

Ask me again after dinner.

“Gerald sounds like he fits in quite well with the kindergarteners,” he says, and Lucy puffs her cheeks up before letting out a huge breath. 

“You’re not wrong. Sometimes I think they all belong in the zoo.”

Tim chuckles and rests his fork on his plate. He reaches for the bottle of wine and holds it up, and Lucy shrugs as she holds out her glass. 

“Why not?”

Tim pours the rest of the wine, splitting it equally between their two glasses. He’s pleasantly warm but not drunk, and he knows he’ll be fine driving home. With Lucy, hopefully. 

Lucy looks up at him over the rim of her glass and she blushes, almost as if she can tell what he’s thinking. 

When their waiter asks about dessert they politely decline and then Tim asks for the check, paying for it without pause even though Lucy offers to cover half. 

“I asked you out, I pay,” Tim says simply, though he does reach for Lucy’s hand and entwines their fingers again as they wait for their waiter to come back. “If you take me out, you can pay.”

Lucy smiles and nods, and then clutches the little box of leftovers to her chest as they walk out of the restaurant hand in hand. 

They pause outside of Tim’s truck, and Lucy bites her lip as he stares down at her, his free hand coming up to cup her jaw. He brushes her cheek with his thumb and then leans down to kiss her gently, chastly, before pulling back. 

“Your apartment is in the opposite direction as mine,” he says, and Lucy nods, her heart beating fast in her chest as she waits for him to continue. “No pressure, Lucy. No matter what you said earlier, you don’t have to say yes. I’m going to ask, because I want you to, but you can say no and I won’t be mad or upset, I promise.”

Lucy nods, and then she smiles slowly because she already knows what she’s going to say. 

“Do you want to come home with me, and stay the night?”

“Yes,” she whispers without hesitation, and Tim smiles before he leans down and kisses her again. This time he backs her up against the truck, and Lucy moans softly as he deepens their kiss. She wants to wrap her arms around him but she’s still holding her box of leftovers, and Tim seems to realize this the same moment she does because he pulls back, chuckles, and then opens her door for her. 

The ride to Tim’s apartment is tense, but not in a bad way. They’re both smiling, eager, excited, and the walk up to Tim’s apartment door is filled with smiles and giggles and pauses to kiss each other up against the wall. Tim eventually gets the door open, and then pulls away from Lucy, blushing, as Tamara raises an eyebrow at them from the couch. 

“Go put your leftovers in the fridge,” he murmurs. “You can freshen up in the bathroom if you want. I’ll pay Tam and send her on her way.”

Lucy nods and then walks into the kitchen, and Tim laughs as he walks over to Tamara.

“Have a good night?” she asks, and Tim nods, smiling, as he reaches for his wallet. 

“We had a wonderful time, thank you for asking. How was Charlotte?”

Tamara gives him a quick rundown of what they’d done, which included playing games together, coloring, and watching a movie until Charlotte had fallen asleep. 

“I gave her a bath and put on that noise machine, and she was out like a light,” Tamara concludes, and Tim is glad that Charlotte is at least easy in this one area. She sleeps easily and without waking up, unless she has a nightmare, which… huh. 

Whoops. 

Hopefully she won’t have one tonight. 

“Anyway… I’ve got to head home. I have a big test in the morning,” Tamara says, and Tim helps her pack up her textbooks as Lucy comes into the living room from the kitchen. He walks over to her, putting his hand on her hip as he kisses her on the forehead. 

“I’ll be right back. I’m gonna walk Tamara to her car.”

Lucy smiles and nods, and she stands awkwardly in the living room until Tim comes back. He closes and locks the door and then toes off his shoes, and then he’s walking toward Lucy, his eyes full of heat as they roam slowly up her body. His breath catches as he reaches her, and he smiles as he pauses just inches away. 

“Do you… do you want some wine, or something?” he asks, and Lucy shakes her head as she reaches for his hand, entwining their fingers and tugging. 

“No. I want you to take me to bed, Tim,” she whispers, and he moans, low and quiet, as she walks backwards toward his bedroom. 

Tim kisses her as they step over the threshold, and then closes the door behind them. 

Chapter Text

“And hope is like love...a ridiculous, wonderful, powerful thing.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Tale of Despereaux

Making love to Lucy is a life changing moment for Tim. 

He’s loved before, but he’s never been in love, a fact that he realizes with startling clarity as he holds Lucy afterwards. They’re both still breathing heavily, still exchanging lazy, sloppy kisses, and Tim realizes with a start that he’s crying. Lucy is murmuring comforting words to him, kissing his cheeks and wiping away the tears, and he’s crying. He’s never cried during or after sex. Ever. 

“S-sorry,” he stutters, and he sniffles, turning over and flopping onto his back. Lucy goes with him easily, plastering her naked body to his and continuing to kiss him as she presses their chests together and slides her legs on either side of his hips.

“For what?” she asks, and she seems genuinely confused. 

Tim turns to stare at her, his vision blurry from the tears, and he thinks he could easily love her for the rest of his life. 

“For crying. I don’t normally…”

A fresh wave of tears interrupts what Tim is trying to say, so he gives up and just holds Lucy closer. 

He wants to tell her about his realization. He wants to tell her that he thinks he’s in love with her, but… 

… well, it’s probably too soon. They’ve only been dating, technically, for a little over a week and a half. 

He should probably keep that realization under wraps for at least a little while longer. 

Lucy seems to realize that he’s grappling with something, even if she doesn’t realize what. She presses a kiss to his chest, right over his heart, and then curls closer. She tangles their legs together and then sighs deeply, melting into Tim, and he feels something settle, warm and sure, in his chest. 

He kisses Lucy’s head and then grabs the blanket, wrapping it around both of them before letting his eyes close. 

There’s the nagging feeling that he’s forgetting something… but he can’t quite put his finger on it, and the allure of sleep is too tempting to pass up. 

He can worry about it in the morning. 

_______________

Tim’s eyes snap open and sudden clarity rains down upon him when he hear little footsteps shuffling down the hallway. The sun is just beginning to rise, painting pinks and yellows across his wall, and he knows Charlotte always wakes up early. 

She wakes up early, and then comes into his room for morning snuggles. 

“Shit.”

He is definitely, completely, utterly naked.

And so is Lucy. 

Lucy groans and grumbles as he sits up and eyes the room frantically. 

Lucy’s bra is hanging over the lamp. 

Her jeans are crumpled into a pile on the floor, her panties with them. 

Her shirt is hanging off the edge of the bed. 

And Tim’s clothes are all in a pile next to the door, where a naked Lucy had pushed him and then stripped him slowly, torturously. 

Charlotte may only be five, but she’s smart, and she cannot see this. 

“Shit,” he says again, and Lucy mumbles something unintelligible as she curls into his suddenly vacated spot. She buries her head into his pillow and pulls the quilt tighter around herself, and Tim has to pause for a moment and stare at her fondly because he didn’t know how much of a morning person she was not and it’s adorable, frankly.

“Daddy?” comes a voice, and Tim’s heart thunders in his chest as he gathers all of their clothes and tosses them into the hamper. He saves Lucy’s panties and then grabs a fresh t-shirt of his for her to wear before quickly pulling on boxer briefs of his own. 

“Just a second, baby,” Tim says, and he’s glad that he taught her that a closed door meant that she should knock. 

It had been a mortifying moment for both of them, even if she hadn’t known what was happening. He’d thankfully had the blanket over his lap when she’d barged in, but the moment had precipitated a very important conversation about privacy. 

“Daddyyyyy,” she whines, and Tim can’t help but smile as he pulls on a t-shirt and then walks back over to the bed. 

“Lu,” he murmurs, and she glares up at him sleepily, her hair a beautiful mess and her lips turned down in a frown. “Charlotte is at the door. Here, put these on.”

Lucy wakes up exactly enough to let Tim help her pull her panties and the t-shirt on, and then she collapses back into the bed. 

Tim kisses her forehead and then walks to the door, opening it. 

“Good morning, baby,” he says, and he lifts Charlotte into his arms. 

When they have time in the mornings, Charlotte likes to crawl into bed and cuddle with him for a while before they have to get their day started. Tim turns and carries her back to the bed, crawling in and laying his little girl down between Lucy and himself. 

“Woo-cy!” Charlotte chirps, and Tim laughs as he watches her crawl toward Lucy and then drape her little body over her. “Woo-cy!”

“Hey,” Lucy murmurs, and Tim’s heart feels full to bursting as he watches Lucy pick up the edge of the blanket and then tuck it around Charlotte. She pulls the little girl closer and Tim can’t possibly be expected to ignore the sight before him. He scoots over and joins them, making a Charlotte sandwich, and then smiles and kisses each of his girls on the forehead. 

“Woo-cy.”

“Yeah, it’s me, baby girl,” Lucy says. “Good morning.”

“Woo-cy. Daddy.”

“Lucy stayed the night with daddy,” Tim explains, though he doesn’t know exactly how much Charlotte will grasp. “We had a sleepover.”

“Sweep,” Charlotte says, and Tim’s grin widens. 

Since saying Woo-cy, the dam seems to have broken and she’s at least been attempting other words. He’s so proud of her, and with each new word she says he falls just a little bit more in love with her. 

“Woo-cy sweep daddy.”

Tim grins and buries his head in Charlotte’s hair.

She’s not wrong… 

“And now Charlotte sleeps too,” Lucy says, and she yawns as she throws an arm over Charlotte’s back and hauls her closer. “It’s too early. Not time to get up yet.”

Tim chuckles and wraps his arms around both of his girls, holding them as close as he can. He knows Charlotte won’t put up with this for long before demanding breakfast, and he wants to soak up as much time with them as he possibly can. 

_______________

As predicted, Charlotte gets tired of cuddling after about half an hour, so Tim swings her into his arms, kisses Lucy on the head, and tells her he’ll make them pancakes if she wants to sleep a little longer. 

Tim has to pause in the doorway to watch as Lucy sleepily rolls over and splays across the whole bed, the blanket pulled down to show the lace of her panties and the swell of her ass. She’s so beautiful, and he can barely believe that she’s here, with him. 

“Daddy,” Charlotte reminds him, and Tim kisses her cheek as he gently closes the bedroom door and walks into the kitchen. He settles Charlotte on the counter with a mixing bowl and a spoon before taking milk, eggs, and butter out of the fridge.

“Daddy, Woo-cy,” Charlotte says, and Tim pauses as he’s pulling the ingredients for pancakes out of the cupboard. He turns toward the counter and stands in front of his little girl, hands on either side of her hips, and gives her his full attention. 

“Do you like Lucy, baby?” he asks, and Charlotte nods, blue eyes wide and lips turned up into a smile. 

“Me, too,” Tim says, and he pauses, considering his next words. “I like her a lot, baby. And… when adults like each other a lot, sometimes they have sleepovers. Lucy might stay with us sometimes. Is that… is that OK?”

Charlotte nods enthusiastically, and then turns and points toward Tim’s bedroom. “Woo-cy.”

“Yeah, baby. She’ll join us soon. She’s just sleepy.”

Charlotte gives Tim a considering look, and Tim tries to maintain his blank expression. Charlotte absolutely does not need to know that he’s the reason Lucy is so tired. 

“Help daddy make pancakes and then we can go wake Lucy up if she’s still sleeping,” he says, and Charlotte nods, turning her attention back toward the bowl she’s holding. 

They work together to mix the batter, and then Tim pulls a chair up next to the stove and helps Charlotte climb up onto it. He smiles at her, at her little bunny covered pajamas and her messy, curly hair, and it feels impossible that he’s only had her for a little over a month. 

It seems like she’s always been here, like he’s loved her for forever. 

“Be careful,” he warns her as he turns the stove on. “It’s hot.”

“Hot,” Charlotte parrots, and Tim leans down, kissing her head.

Tim lets Charlotte help him measure out enough batter for each pancake and pour it into the pan, and then they watch it together. 

“When the top is bubbly, it’s ready to flip,” he tells her. Charlotte nods and grips onto the spatula with both hands, eyes wide as she watches the pancake. 

“Fwip!” she squeaks, and Tim turns from where he’s setting out plates and glasses to see that the pancake is bubbling and ready to be turned. 

“Good job,” he praises Charlotte, and he takes the spatula, flips the pancake, and then gives it back to Charlotte. She continues to watch, ever vigilant, as the pancake cooks. Tim finishes setting out their breakfast dishes, and then takes the pancake out of the pan before starting another one. 

They work together, him and Charlotte, until they have a small pile. Tim sets them on the table along with butter and syrup, and then picks Charlotte up and sets her on the ground. 

“Go wake Lucy up,” he says, and Charlotte nods enthusiastically as she runs into the hallway. 

Tim starts making two cups of coffee and smiles widely when he hears Charlotte squealing and Lucy laughing. They join him in the kitchen a few minutes later, Lucy now wearing a pair of his sweatpants in addition to his t-shirt. She has Charlotte on her hip and the little girl is leaning her head on her shoulder, her fingers in her mouth. 

“Morning,” Tim greets. He leans down and kisses Lucy briefly on the lips before pulling out Charlotte’s chair and helping Lucy settle her in. 

“Good morning,” she says, and once her hands are free she reaches for Tim, hauling him close to her and kissing him again. Tim melts into it, wrapping his arms loosely around her waist and deepening the kiss as much as he dares with an observant kindergartener in the room. 

“Very good morning,” he amends, and Lucy laughs as she sits down in the chair next to Charlotte. 

It’s nice, having breakfast with Lucy and Charlotte, Tim thinks. It’s nice having her here, in his clothes and in his bed. She fits in with them seamlessly and it’s nice. 

He smiles and watches as Charlotte tears her pancake into tiny pieces before eating it. He watches as Lucy soaks her in syrup. 

He watches, and he hopes. 

He hopes he can have this for a long time to come. 

Chapter Text

A week later Charlotte is back at school and Tim is starting his first day back at work since leaving the military. He’s greeted by Nolan’s huge smile and firm handshake, and shown around the different parts of Ascension Protection Services that he hadn’t seen during his interview. 

He makes it less than two hours before his phone rings. 

Incoming call from: Lucy Chen ☀️

Tim sighs and then glances up at Nolan. 

“My daughter…” he says, and Nolan smiles and waves. 

“Break room is right over there,” he murmurs, and Tim is eternally grateful that he has managed to land a job with such an understanding man. 

“Hey, what’s up?” Tim asks, but he can tell immediately what’s up by the way Charlotte is shrieking in the background. 

“So we’re having a hard day,” Lucy says, and Tim almost laughs because understatement of the year. 

“What happened? Do you need me to come to the school?”

“I think maybe? We’ve been trying all the usual things to calm her down, but they’re not working, and —”

Lucy is cut off by a continuous stream of Charlotte screaming “DADDY! DADDY! DADDY!” over and over and over again. 

“... yeah, I think you need to come to the school. She’s worked herself up into a panic and I’m afraid she’s going to pass out or throw up, or-or…”

“I’m on my way, Lu. I can be there in twenty minutes.”

“Oh, god, thank you.”

Tim covers the speaker of the phone with his hand and sticks his head out of the break room. 

“I know it’s my first day, but —”

“DADDY! DADDY! DAAAAAADDY!”

Nolan raises an eyebrow and winces, and Tim shrugs. 

“She’s having a meltdown at school. I need to go.”

“I meant what I said,” Nolan whispers. “Family first. Get back here when you can.”

Tim thanks him profusely and then presses the phone back to his ear as he heads in the direction of the locker room. 

“I’m on my way,” he says, and Lucy thanks him again as Charlotte continues to scream in the background. “Can you put me on speakerphone next to her? Maybe I can help calm her down.”

“Good idea, hold on…”

Tim grabs his wallet and keys and is out the door in record time. He’s climbing into his truck by the time Lucy has managed to calm Charlotte down enough to let her know that her daddy is on the phone. 

“Daddy,” Charlotte whimpers, and Tim’s heart breaks a little bit at the way her voice cracks. She’s still sobbing, hiccuping as she tries to catch her breath, and Tim hasn’t often broken traffic laws in his life but he’s going to today. 

“Hey, baby!” he says, and he tries to inject as much cheerfulness into his voice as he can. “Hi! It’s your first day back at school, and first days can be hard, huh?”

“Uh huh,” Charlotte says. Tim can hear Lucy whispering to her, and he can imagine her cradling Charlotte in her arms gently, rocking her back and forth to calm her down. “Daddy. Home.”

“You wanna go home?” he asks, and Charlotte makes an affirmative noise over the phone. “We’ll see, OK? Can you tell me what happened?”

“I was there,” Lucy interjects. “In case she doesn’t feel like talking about it, or can’t. I can tell you everything when you get here.”

“OK,” Tim says, and then, because he’s been encouraging Charlotte to talk as much as she can, “Can you tell me, baby girl?”

Charlotte sniffles and doesn’t speak for several moments. Tim waits patiently, because he’s learned that sometimes it takes her a minute to find the words in her head. She’s just recently started speaking, one or two words at a time, and it takes a lot out of her. 

“C-conwad. Mean.”

Tim’s blood boils immediately because he remembers that boy and his father from the class party, and they are not pleasent memories. 

“I’m sorry he was mean, Charlotte. What did he say?”

Charlotte sniffles again and then takes a deep breath, and Tim winces as she begins screaming in earnest yet again. 

“How close are you?” Lucy asks, and Tim glances at the navigation screen on his truck dashboard. 

“2 minutes.”

“We’re up in the office with Principal Grey. Just come straight in when you get here, OK?”

“I will,” Tim promises. He sighs as he speeds through a yellow light, and bites back tears of frustration as Charlotte continues to scream. “I want to know everything that happened.”

“As soon as you’re here,” Lucy promises. 

Tim thanks her and hangs up the phone. He pulls into the elementary school parking lot less than a minute later, parks hurriedly, and then rings the doorbell to be let in. He appreciates that they don’t let just anyone walk in, but it always takes a minute for them to check the cameras, see who’s at the door, and buzz them in, and Tim is practically vibrating with nervous energy as he waits. 

He hears the click as the lock disengages and pushes the door open before practically running into the office. He follows the sounds of Charlotte’s voice, and in less than a few seconds he has his baby girl in his arms. She’s sobbing, a full body sob that Tim knows will end with her exhausted and cranky once she calms down. 

She buries her head in his neck and continues to cry even as he runs his hand up and down her back comfortingly. 

“What happened?” he asks, looking around the office. He sees the two secretaries eyeing him warily, as well as Lucy, Principal Grey, and Conrad. 

Principal Grey steps in and explains.

“Ms. Chen brought Charlotte up to the office at the beginning of their specials time. Charlotte was crying and was inconsolable. Apparently another student told Charlotte that she was stupid and that she had been better before she started talking, because now she sounded even more stupid.”

Tim closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, because he knows that Conrad had learned his behaviors from somewhere. Five year olds imitated what they saw and heard, and while he’s mad at the situation, he can’t find it in himself to be mad at a child who doesn’t even come up to his waist.

His father on the other hand…

“N-not su-pid!” Charlotte screams into his neck, and Tim holds her closer as she continues to sob. 

“Of course you’re not,” Lucy murmurs, and she takes a step forward, placing one hand on Tim’s forearm while the other joins his on Charlotte’s back. “You’re perfect just the way you are, and we love hearing you talk. Your daddy and I love hearing you speak and say new words.”

Charlotte sniffles and turns her face toward her teacher. 

“Woo-cy.”

“Yeah, baby, I’m Lucy. I love hearing your voice. So does your daddy.”

“Wove.”

“That’s right,” Tim says, and he lets out a sigh and allows himself to lean on Lucy a little bit as he holds his little girl. “We love you and your voice.”

Principal Grey is just opening his mouth to speak when the door buzzes again, and Tim glances over and stiffens immediately as Conrad’s father, Chris Sanford, walks through the door. He goes to his son immediately and then glares at where Tim and Lucy are both comforting Charlotte.

“What happened?”

Principal Grey sighs and motions toward his office.

“Let’s take this somewhere more private, shall we?”

Chris nods and they all follow Grey into his office. He closes the door, and immediately Chris is yelling. 

“Why the fuck did I walk into a scene where everyone is comforting her, and my son is sitting in the corner all on his own, crying?”

Lucy steps away from Tim and Charlotte and tries to explain. “Conrad caused Charlotte to have a full meltdown in class by saying mean words. He wasn’t being ignored, I promise, but the immediate concern was calming Charlotte down enough that she didn’t send herself into a panic attack.”

Chris is still frowning, but Tim is glad to see that he has enough sense not to push the issue. 

“What did he supposedly say?” he asks, and whatever calm Tim had managed evaporates.

Lucy puts a hand on his arm to stop him as she turns to Chris. 

(Neither of them miss the way that Chris zeros in on where they’re touching, but Tim figures that can be a problem for later). 

“I witnessed the incident, Mr. Sanford,” she says calmly. “We were in math groups, and Charlotte answered one of my questions. Conrad though the way she said the number ‘three’ sounded odd, so he told her, ‘You sound stupid. I wish you would go back to not talking because you sound more stupid now’. Charlotte started crying, but thankfully it was almost time to take the children to specials so I was able to clear the room and bring them both here.”

Chris scoffs, and Tim’s disdain for the man grows. “She’s being too sensitive,” he says. 

“Not su-pid!” Charlotte yells, and Tim is so proud of her his chest hurts. 

“Calling another child stupid and then blaming the victim for being ‘too sensitive’. Good job, Mr. Sanford,” Tim scoffs. Lucy’s hand on his arm tightens, but he’s not giving in on this one. “No wonder Conrad thinks it’s OK to mock children for having speech impediments and autism. A+ parenting. You must be so proud of yourself.”

Afraid that he’ll say or do something stupid if he has to stay in the room with Chris, Tim stalks out of Grey’s office and stands by one of the secretaries desks. Charlotte sucks on her fingers and lays her head on his shoulder, and Tim takes a few deep breaths. He can hear Chris, Lucy, and Principal Grey talking in the office, but he can’t make out the words. Whatever happens, though, he knows that Lucy and Grey are on his side, because when Chris comes out he’s mad. He signs Conrad out, throws a dirty look in Tim’s direction, and then slams the door on his way out. 

Tim takes a deep breath and walks back into the office. 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Bradford,” Principal Grey says. Tim nods curtly, and then turns to look at Lucy. 

He feels a little bad for going off on Chris, because he knows Lucy was just trying to do her job without causing too many issues with another student’s parent. 

“Thank you, and I’m sorry for going off like that,” he says, and he finds that it’s easier to calm down when Chris and Conrad aren’t around. 

Lucy walks over and puts a hand on Charlotte’s back, and then one on Tim’s. Grey raises an eyebrow, and then sighs as he sits at his desk. 

“I do need to ask, though…”

Lucy winces and pulls away from both Tim and Charlotte. 

“Are you two… involved in a more personal relationship than just parent and teacher? I noticed… you seem much closer, after Winter Break.”

Tim stiffens, because he doesn’t think that’s any of Grey’s business, but Lucy nods. 

“Yes, sir.”

Grey sighs and leans back in his chair. 

“That’s not an issue, is it?” Tim asks, because he can’t imagine why it would be… 

“Normally, no,” Grey says. “There’s no law against it, but it is a … moral grey area, because the teacher can be accused of favoritism if they're romantically involved with a student’s parent. And normally I wouldn’t say anything, because I know Ms. Chen is a professional and would never let something like this affect her students or how she teaches them.”

Lucy swallows and glances up at Tim, her eyes wide and full of trepidation. 

“But?” she asks, because she knows there’s a ‘but’ coming. 

“But Chris Sanford is on the Board of Education. And he could make your life very difficult, when it comes time to decide on rehiring.”

“OK, so we take Charlotte out of Lucy’s class,” Tim says, because his relationship with Lucy might be new, but he knows that he’s in love with her. “She’s going to be in Mr. West’s class next year, right? If we retain her? So… we could just make the move now.”

Grey nods slowly. “That could work…”

Tim holds Charlotte closer and tries to calm his pounding heart. He can have Lucy, and have a wonderful teacher for Charlotte. Lucy has sung West’s praises on more than one occasion, and he knows Charlotte will do well in his class.

But… 

“No.”

Both Tim and Grey turn to Lucy. She swallows and reaches out to take Tim’s hand. 

“No. I… Charlotte is just settling in. She’s just opening up, and beginning to talk. What is going to happen if we upend her life again? She won’t take to the change well. You know that, Tim. You know that change sets her back. We both know that. We would be setting her back weeks, maybe even more. We can’t risk it.”

“But Lu,” he murmurs, and she smiles at him but shakes her head.

“She’s only in my class for four more months, Tim. I think she should finish the year with me, and then we can take the summer preparing her for the change to Mr. West’s class. We… we can wait, right? If this is real, if it’s something we both want in four months… then, then we can wait, right?”

Tim doesn’t want to admit she’s right. He doesn’t want to give in, to give her up all because Chris might make keeping her job difficult. 

“Fuck Sanford,” he growls, and Lucy laughs a little wetly but she doesn’t contradict him. “Can he really cause that much damage?”

Grey nods slowly. “Yes. He’s very influential in this town. He’s an ADA, and his family has been on the board of education since before he was born. He doesn’t like you very much,” Grey says, and Tim snorts because that’s an understatement. “And he’s been … interested in Ms. Chen since the beginning of the year. If he were jealous, or mad because his son got in trouble for bullying Charlotte… well, if he were to paint a picture of Ms. Chen showing favoritism to students based on who she’s dating… she’s not tenured here. What I’m trying to say is, it would be easy for him to cause trouble.”

“Tim,” Lucy says, and he turns to her. She’s staring at him with wide, wet eyes, and he wants to hold her but he knows he shouldn't. Not here. 

Not now. 

“Lu,” he says, and then he laughs softly, sadly, when Charlotte echos him. 

“Woo,” she says, and Lucy smiles as she reaches out and runs her hand up and down the little girl’s back. 

“We can wait. My job is important to me. Charlotte’s education and well-being are important to me. We can just… we can just be parent and teacher for a few more months, until Conrad moves onto first grade.”

Tim stares at her for a long moment. He wants to tell her that he loves her, that they shouldn’t have to give this, them, up because Chris is a dick. 

But he doesn’t. 

It’s her job on the line. 

Her passion, the thing she loves doing most. 

And… she’s right. His love for her isn’t going to diminish in the next four months. If anything, it’ll grow. 

They can do this. 

They can wait. 

“OK,” he whispers, and he wants to kiss her, one more time, but he can’t. “All right. We can be professionals. For now.”

Lucy laughs and nods, a sad smile stretching her lips. She holds out a hand and Tim shakes it, and then they work together to get Charlotte to let go of Tim so she can go back to class and he can go back to work. 

“I’ll see you at car pick up,” Lucy says, and Tim smiles a little sadly as he nods. 

“See you then.”

Chapter Text

“The world was beautiful. It surprised me, how beautiful it kept on insisting on being. In spite of all the lies, it was beautiful.”

― Kate DiCamillo, Louisiana's Way Home

The first week passes in a blur.

Tim doesn’t think he would have had time to go out with Lucy even if he had been able to. His new job, plus helping Charlotte settle back into the routine of school again, has him exhausted and utterly spent by Friday night. 

It’s Saturday morning when he’s making pancakes and thinking about the last time he’d made pancakes that it really hits him. 

For now, at least… he and Lucy have broken up. 

They’re no longer dating. 

He can’t take her out to dinner this weekend, or kiss her, or make slow, sweet love to her. They won’t wake up to Charlotte crawling into the bed in the early hours of the morning, and he won’t be able to make them pancakes and kiss her against the counter while Charlotte demands a kiss, too. 

He knows they didn’t break up because they wanted to… but it still hurts.

“Daddy,” Charlotte says, and Tim snaps out of his thoughts to realize the pancake in the pan is nearly burning. 

“Sorry, baby,” he murmurs. He flips the pancake and then hands the spatula back to Charlotte, and then sighs as he eyes his phone where it's laying on the counter. 

He's been tempted to text Lucy all week. To tell her how his new job is going, to show her pictures of things Charlotte has done, or just to talk. 

But he hasn't. 

He wants to, but he doesn't. 

"Woo-cy."

Tim turns to see Charlotte staring at him with wide, blue eyes, and he feels his heart break just a little bit more. 

He's not the only one missing her. 

He'd brought Lucy into Charlotte's life, her personal life, and now she's gone. She won't come over for movies or morning snuggles or pancakes or kisses. 

For almost four whole months. 

112 days. 

He has 112 days until Charlotte graduates Kindergarten on May 5th. 

"Ready for breakfast, big girl?" Tim asks, turning to his daughter, and Charlotte nods as she holds out the spatula. Tim takes it and rescues the final (only slightly burnt) pancake and then brings them over to the table. Charlotte follows, still wearing one of the aprons Tim keeps in the kitchen. She's dwarfed by it, and Tim chuckles as he lifts her up so she doesn't trip on the strings. 

He sets her in her chair, and then puts the least burnt pancake on her plate. 

"Woo-cy," Charlotte says again, looking around in confusion, and Tim sighs as he tries to smile. 

"Ms. Lucy isn't here today," he says simply, and he wishes he had the words to explain the situation to Charlotte. Her Ms. Woo-cy had been there the last time they'd had pancakes, and now she's not, and Charlotte pouts as she stares down at her plate. 

"Want Woo-cy."

"Me, too, baby," Tim says. He sighs and reaches for the syrup. "Want some?"

Charlotte nods and then sighs a very cute, dramatic baby sigh, and then sets about very seriously tearing her pancake into pieces. 

They eat in silence, and then Charlotte goes into the living room and grabs her stuffed bunny. She walks through the entire house, still in her footie pajamas, and then comes back into the living room with a frown. 

Tim knows who she was looking for. 

But Lucy isn't here. 

_________________

Tim receives a text from Lucy two weeks later, and his heart pounds frantically in his chest as he opens it. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: We finished with Charlotte's testing and scheduled an initial IEP meeting for next Wednesday at 11am.  We'll be sending home an official notice for the meeting, but I wanted to message you just in case. Things go missing in kindergarten backpacks. 😉 Can you make it during that time?

Tim sits back in his chair. 

He's at work (uninterrupted, for the past week and a half, which he's grateful for) and he had answered his phone half terrified Charlotte would be having another tantrum, and half hoping Lucy would have texted him something not-school related. 

He sighs and sends a response. 

Tim: I'll be there. Thank you for letting me know. 

Lucy: 👍🏼

Tim turns his phone over, and doesn't look at it again for the rest of the day. 

__________________

The day of Charlotte's IEP meeting comes all too soon, and Tim, for some reason, finds himself nervous as he walks into the school. He sees Lucy walking her kindergartners to specials and waves. She smiles and waves back, and Tim smiles as he watches each little kid with their bubbles in their cheeks and their hands on their hips. Charlotte sees him and loses her focus entirely, and Tim laughs as he walks over. 

"Daddy!"

"Hey, baby!" Tim says, and he swings Charlotte up into his arms and hugs her as Lucy passes her kids off to the PE teacher. She walks over when she's done, and smiles softly at them. 

"Daddy at school?" Charlotte asks, and Tim nods as he runs his fingers through her crazy hair. 

"Daddy has a meeting with Ms. Lucy and Principal Grey."

Charlotte stares at him for a long moment and then says, very decisively, "Daddy bad. Go to principal."

Lucy snorts and Tim rolls his eyes as he looks at her. He grins, but then his smile falls because he is so in love with her, and even though she's standing right next to him, he feels like the space between them is insurmountable. 

"Hey, baby, you gotta go to class," Tim says, and he clears his throat as he puts Charlotte down on the ground. Her tennis shoes light up and she's briefly distracted, and then she nods, hugging Tim's leg tightly before Lucy leads her back to the gym.

Once she's with the rest of her class, Lucy joins Tim in the hallway and clears her throat. 

"We're, uh, meeting in the conference room," she says, and Tim nods as he stuffs his hands in his pocket. 

They walk through the office and into the conference room with a foot of space between them. 

Tim remembers what it feels like to have her naked body against his, and it feels wrong for her to be so far away from him now.

It gets a little easier once the meeting starts, though, because Tim is too busy trying desperately to keep up. 

He's introduced to the Special Education teacher, Mrs. Harper, who is no-nonsense but has a kind smile. Tim thinks Charlotte will do well with her, and he feels more at ease as Mrs. Harper begins going through all of the data. 

"We're sending a copy of this home with you, by the way, so you don't have to try and remember all of this."

"OK," Tim says, and then he sighs and runs a hand through his hair as he leans back in his chair. "It's a little overwhelming. There's a lot of "far below average" scores here."

"There are," Mrs. Harper says, and Tim appreciates that she's not sugarcoating things. "But we expected that, with Charlotte's history. She scored far below average in all of the areas we assessed, including OT/PT, speech, and social-emotional awareness. Because of her diagnoses of Autism, ADHD, failure to thrive, Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome, PTSD, and the gap between her scores and her IQ of 76, she's going to qualify for full SPED minutes under 'Other Health Impairment'. She'll receive minutes in basic reading instruction, reading comprehension, reading fluency, written expression, math calculation, math fluency, OT/PT, speech, and behavioral therapy."

"OK," Tim says again, and while he's happy that Charlotte will be getting so much help, he's overwhelmed. "Does that mean she won't be in Lucy's class anymore?"

Lucy shakes her head. "She'll still be with me, Tim. She'll stay with me for instruction, and then go to Mrs. Harper for independent work time. We'll go over that in a minute."

"Right," Tim says, and he feels like he's barely holding on as the meeting continues. 

Mrs. Harper talks about the next three sections of Charlotte's 14-page Individual Education Plan, and then concludes with, "Do you have any questions?"

Tim laughs and puts his copy back down on the table. 

"Only about a thousand," he says, and everyone at the table chuckles. 

"I can help answer any questions you have," Lucy says, and Tim smiles softly at her before turning back to the table as a whole. 

"We'll have a yearly meeting to make any needed changes to her IEP, and we'll re-evaluate in three years. We'll make some final changes to this, add her minutes in, and then we'll send a final copy home."

"Perfect," Tim says, and Lucy smiles encouragingly at him. "Thank you all, so much. Charlotte is just… blooming here. We're so grateful for all of you."

"She's a sweetheart, and we're lucky to have her," Principal Grey says, and Tim shoots the man a thankful smile as he begins gathering all of the papers on the table. He hands Tim two, one titled Procedural Safeguards and the other Draft IEP: Charlotte Bradford. 

"These are yours," he says, and Tim nods, folding them and clutching them tightly as he stands. 

He shakes the hands of each member of the team, and then walks with Lucy back into the office. 

"We may have a few rough days with the transition," she says, and Tim nods, because he's sure they will. In the end, being in special education will be a huge benefit to Charlotte, but he knows there will be an adjustment period while she gets used to Mrs. Harper. 

"That's fine," he says, and he means it. "I'll let Nolan know that I may have to leave on short notice."

Lucy nods and then stands awkwardly in front of Tim. 

"I should… I need to go get the kids. PE is almost over."

"OK," Tim says, and he stuffs his hands in his pockets as he smiles at Lucy. 

It's not what he wants to say, but it'll have to do for now. 

"See you," Lucy whispers, and then she's walking out of the office.

Tim watches her go, and then walks into the hallway. 

He's too busy staring at Lucy as she smiles and greets her students enthusiastically to notice another teacher rushing through the halls, and he lets out a surprised breath when she runs into him. 

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," she says frantically, and Tim laughs as he reaches a hand out to steady her. 

"No worries. Hey, Ashley, right?"

Ashley nods, and Tim smiles at her as she brushes a lock of hair behind her ear. 

"Yeah. I remember you… you're…"

"Charlotte's dad," Tim supplies, and Ashley grins as she nods. 

"Yeah. We bumped into each other before, too. Must be fate."

Tim laughs and shrugs. "Must be," he agrees, and then he steps to the side to let her pass. "You probably need to go get your students, too, right?"

Ashley nods and walks backward a few steps. 

"Yeah, I do. It was nice seeing you, though. Maybe I'll see you around?"

Tim nods, but his heart isn't in it. He's sure he'll see her around, since she's a kindergarten teacher and his daughter is in kindergarten, but he knows she means it in a different way. 

Tim watches Ashley walk away and then turns to head toward the door. He pauses with his hand on the glass, though, when he sees Lucy staring at him, her lips parted and her eyes downcast. 

He smiles and waves, but she doesn't wave back. 

He leaves, and sighs heavily as he walks into the crisp afternoon air. 

91 days. 

Chapter Text

“But she couldn't help it. She did hope. She was hoping. She had been hoping all along.”

― Kate DiCamillo, Flora & Ulysses: The Illuminated Adventures

There are 89 days left to the school year, including weekends, and Lucy isn’t sure how she’s going to be able to wait that long to hold Tim again, to kiss him or crawl into bed with him. She doesn’t know how she’s going to be able to last that long without snuggling on the couch with Charlotte and watching Disney movies, or hearing her little giggles as she demands kisses and attention. 

It’s hard. 

Her apartment seems so empty without Charlotte’s little laughs (though she knows Charlotte has never been to her place, the echoes of her laughter had followed Lucy home most nights). 

She keeps looking at her phone, wanting to text Tim. She wants to call him and hear his deep, rumbling voice. She wants to whisper into his ear how much she cares about him. She wants to make dinner with him, and breakfast, and show Charlotte how to help with each thing, because Charlotte loves to help and she loves Charlotte. 

“Woo-cy.”

Her thoughts are interrupted by a soft little voice, and Lucy smiles. 

At least she can see the little girl at school, and Tim every day for car pick up. 

It’s not much. 

But it’s enough. 

For now.

“Hey, Charlotte. What’s up?”

They’re at recess, and Lucy is helping survey the flock of children to make sure no one gets hurt or into a fight. She’s standing in the middle of the grassy playground, her fellow teachers next to her.

Charlotte just holds out her hands, though, which Lucy has come to learn means that she just wants a hug. 

She’s not sure how often Charlotte had been hugged in the past when she was with her mother, so she always obliges.

They have a lot of hugs to make up for. 

Charlotte sighs and melts against her, her own little arms wrapping around Lucy’s legs. 

“She’s so sweet,” Jackson murmurs, and Lucy smiles and nods in agreement as she holds the little girl. 

“And her dad is hot like woah,” Ashley chips in, and Lucy chuckles in agreement but her heart aches at Ashley’s words. 

“Yeah, he is,” Jackson agrees, and Lucy rolls her eyes. Her entire team wants to climb Tim like a tree, and the thing is, she can’t even blame them. Especially not now that she’s actually climbed Tim like a tree. 

He’s very climbable. 

She smiles to herself and thinks about the night she’d shared with Tim. He’d asked her to stay over again, near the end of Winter Break, but she had to be up early the next day and so she’d declined. 

She wishes now that she hadn’t. 

She wishes that she’d spent that second night with him, because now she’s looking at 89 long, lonely nights alone in her apartment. 

How had she gotten attached so far? Maybe this is for the best after all. Some time apart to think about things, to make sure that this is what they really want. 

“Do you think he’s single?” Ashley muses, and Jackson makes a humming noise. 

“Maybe. I mean, yes, he’s very edible, but… he has a high needs daughter to care for who he’s only had custody of for a little while. He may not have time to date.”

“I wonder what happened to Charlotte’s mom,” Ashley whispers, and Lucy sighs. 

“It wasn’t a good situation. Charlotte is much better off where she is now,” she says, but she doesn’t give any more details. She doesn’t want to violate the privacy laws, and also she doesn’t think it’s any of Ashley or Jackson’s business. Jackson’s maybe, because he’s going to have Charlotte next year, but Lucy thinks she’ll let Tim decide what and when to tell him. Or maybe they’ll tell Jackson together, because Lucy hopes that by next September when Charlotte starts kindergarten for the second time, that she’ll get to go to Open House with them. 

She desperately wants to be a part of Tim and Charlotte’s lives. 

The recess bell rings and Lucy sighs as she begins lining her students up. As always, Charlotte stands in the front and holds her hand, the fingers of her other hand in her mouth. Lucy smiles down at her, and when Charlotte smiles back, big and happy, her blue eyes crinkling, Lucy knows that the next 89 days can’t possibly pass fast enough. 

___________________

A few days later, Lucy realizes that Tim is just as desperate as she is for the end of the school year. 

He’s picking Charlotte up, wrestling with the wiggly kindergartener as he tries to make her put her shoes back on before they walk to the truck, when he turns and smiles at Lucy. 

It’s a soft smile, the kind of smile she’s only ever seen him have around her and Charlotte. 

“86 more days,” he murmurs, and Lucy’s heart stops beating because he’s counting down, too. 

It makes it easier, somehow, to know that he’s in the same boat she is. 

Her traitorous brain, however, sees it fit to ruin the moment. She blurts out, “But what about Ashley?” before she can think better of it. Her cheeks burn with embarrassment and she wishes she could snatch the words back, but they're already out there so all she can do is stare at her feet and blush. 

“Lucy,” Tim whispers, and Lucy doesn’t want to look up but the way he says her name but she can’t help it. His voice is quiet and pleading, and she needs to see his face.

“Um, that was stupid. Sorry. I just… I saw you guys talking in the hallway the other day, and then Ashley was talking about you at recess. And I guess…”

She trails off, because she doesn't know what she guesses, but she knows she’s being silly, if the intense look in Tim’s eyes is anything to go by. 

“It’s just you,” he murmurs, and Lucy blushes again, this time for an entirely different reason. “I will wait however long I need to. But I’m waiting for you. I don’t want anyone else, Lucy.”

“Woo-cy.”

Lucy chuckles, and she tries to ignore how wet it sounds. She will not cry during car pickup while surrounded by children. 

Charlotte holds out her hands and Lucy picks her up for one final hug. Tim quickly swoops in and puts her shoes back on while she’s distracted, and then grins triumphantly. 

“Bye, sweetheart. I’ll see you on Monday,” Lucy says, and she hugs Charlotte extra tight before handing her back to Tim. 

“Bye, Lucy,” Tim murmurs, and he stares at her for a long moment, his eyes intense and his lips stretched into a smile. 

“Bye, Woo-cy,” Charlotte adds, and Lucy wants nothing more than to go home with them. To make dinner together and laugh and watch silly Disney movies.

86 more days.

________________

Tim has bathed Charlotte, read her three bedtime stories, and has just managed to get her to sleep when there’s a knock on his front door. He frowns and walks toward it quickly, hoping that the noise won’t wake Charlotte.

He’s barely opened the door before he has an armful of Lucy Chen, and while he’s shocked, it feels so good to have her in his arms again. 

“Tim,” she whispers, and he holds her tighter because he can hear the emotion in her voice. 

“Hey,” he says, and Lucy chuckles, her cheeks pink, when she pulls away. “What are you doing here?”

Lucy shrugs and then bites her lip as she takes an uncertain step back. “I’ve been thinking about you all day. About how much I miss you and how much I wish I’d said yes all those times you asked me to stay the night because now I can’t and I miss you.”

Tim makes a noise and then pulls her into his arms again. 

“I miss you, too,” he murmurs, and then before he quite knows what’s happening his lips are on Lucy’s and he’s kissing her desperately. He closes the door and then presses her up against it, and Lucy moans when he pulls back just far enough to meet her eyes.

“Just this once?” she whispers, and Tim is nodding before he can truly comprehend how terrible of an idea this is. 

He doesn’t care. 

He wants her. 

In seconds he has the door locked, the lights out, and he’s taking Lucy’s hand and leading her into his bedroom. 

He presses her into the bed and slowly undresses her, kissing every inch of skin he finds. He strips her carefully, lovingly, and then, when she’s naked, he pulls back and sheds his own clothes. 

“I love you,” Lucy whispers, and her breath catches in a way that lets Tim know that she hadn’t meant to let the words slip past her lips. She’d probably been repeating them in her head, endlessly, the same way he had, and Tim can see that she’s nervous as she waits for his response. 

“I love you, too,” he says with zero hesitation, because he does love her. 

He has loved her. 

He will always love her. 

“I love you so much. I love how you love Charlotte, and how you make her smile. I love how you fit so perfectly into our lives, and I can’t wait until you’re here all of the time.”

Lucy nods and then kisses him again as he spreads her legs and settles between them. 

He makes love to her slowly, softly, lovingly. He kisses her lips and her cheeks and her eyelids, and caresses her belly, her breasts, and up and down her thighs when they begin to shake. By the time they’re both on the edge, about to come together, Lucy is crying, her eyes closed and her breath coming in shallow pants. 

Tim holds her close as they climax together and he holds her for a long time after, too. 

He holds her until she stops crying, until she makes a face and then giggles when he pulls out of her. He holds her until he has to get up and grab a rag because they’re both sticky and a little bit gross, and then he holds her a little bit more. 

“Stay,” he asks, because he will always ask. 

Lucy smiles and kisses him again as she crawls out of his bed and begins searching for her panties. (She finds them on top of Tim’s dresser and wonders when, exactly, they’d gotten thrown there).

“I want to,” she says, and Tim knows that she’s going to say no. He smiles anyway, because he knows it’s not that she wants to say no, but that she feels like she has to. “But I shouldn’t. If I do, we’ll confuse Charlotte more in the morning. It’s best… to wait until school is out, and then I swear, I’ll stay every time you ask me.”

“Every time, huh?” Tim asks, and Lucy rolls her eyes at him as he props himself up on one arm. He’s still gloriously naked, and Lucy wants to crawl right back into bed with him. She forces herself to put on her jeans instead, and buttons them before she can get any ideas. 

“Every time,” she promises, and then she leans over and kisses Tim again. “Walk me out?”

Tim nods, puts on a pair of boxer briefs, and then follows her to the door. He pulls her into his arms before she can leave, though, and presses kisses to her face until she’s laughing and pushing him away. 

“I love you,” he tells her, and she smiles as she kisses him one final time. 

“I love you, too. 86 more days, right?”

“Right,” Tim agrees. 

He watches her walk all the way down the hall until she’s out of sight, and then he closes the door and goes to bed with a smile, wrapped in blankets that smell like Lucy. 

Chapter Text

“Everything, as you well know (having lived in this world long enough to have figured out a thing or two for yourself), cannot always be sweetness and light.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Tale of Despereaux

It’s a Tuesday, 35 days until Tim can ask Lucy out again, when Charlotte comes barreling up to Tim with a paper clutched tightly into her little fist. She waves it around frantically as he walks up to the car pick up line, and he shares a soft, sweet look with Lucy as he sweeps Charlotte into his arms. 

“We have a field trip next week,” Lucy tells him, and Tim grins as he kisses Charlotte’s forehead. “I told the children that parents are welcome, and Charlotte said ‘daddy’ approximately a hundred times after that so I think you’re going to have to come with us.”

Tim laughs and reaches for the paper as he settles Charlotte onto his hip.

“Sounds like I am. Where are we going?”

Lucy grins as she glances back at the remaining few kindergarteners behind her, making sure they’re safe and that no one is running into the road, before she points to the top portion of the permission slip. 

“We’re going to the aquarium, and then the park for lunch afterward.”

“Sounds fun!” Tim says, and Charlotte nods as she bounces in his arms. 

“Daw-phin.”

Lucy laughs.

“We looked at pictures of the exhibits today. Charlotte is very interested in the dolphins,” she explains, and Tim smiles as he tucks the permission slip into his back pocket. He’s standing a few feet away from Lucy, but he wants to lean forward and take her into his arms. 

He wants her to show up at his door again, to take her to bed and show her how much he loves her. 

But he can’t. 

Yet. 

35 more days. 

“I can’t wait,” he says, and he knows it’s going to be torture being with Lucy all day and not being able to touch her, but he wouldn’t miss Charlotte’s first field trip for the entire world. 

“It’s next Monday,” Lucy explains, and Tim nods. 

“I’ll bring the permission slip and money to school tomorrow. I don’t want it to get lost in her backpack.”

“Thank,” Lucy whispers, and Tim wishes that he could come up with a million more reasons to stay and talk to her, but he knows she still has a job to do. She still has children to supervise, and then she has to go back to her classroom and get ready for school tomorrow, so he doesn’t. 

He smiles and waves, and then walks Charlotte to the truck, opening the back door and helping her climb into her carseat. She’s still not able to buckle it independently, though he lets her try. He turns and watches Lucy as Charlotte fiddles with the chest buckle, and he smiles as she hands off a little girl to her mother. She’s talking animatedly with her hands, probably about the field trip, and Tim sighs as she waves at the family and then turns toward his truck. She catches him staring and he grins, waving as he turns back to Charlotte. 

35 more days. 

_________________

The day of the field trip comes all too quickly, and Tim finds himself standing in Lucy’s classroom, his arms crossed as he glares across the room at Chris. 

“Tim,” Lucy admonishes quietly, and he sighs as he lets his arms drop.

“I don’t like him,” he grumbles, and Lucy laughs. 

“Play nice, please. I still have Conrad in class for 29 days. Just don’t… talk to him, or look at him. Pretend he’s not there, just… stop glaring, oh my god.”

Tim grumbles something under his breath, but he’s distracted when Charlotte runs up to him. 

“Daw-phin!” she cries, and Tim laughs as he sweeps her into his arms. She’s wearing cotton shorts and a little t-shirt that has a picture of a dolphin on it, along with her favorite light up shoes, and her hair is pulled back into two braids running down her back. Tim kisses her on the forehead and nods. 

“Yeah, baby, we’re gonna go see the dolphins.”

Tim flinches when he sees Chris walking toward him, and he only relaxes his grip when Charlotte squeaks. 

“Too tight, daddy,” she says, and Tim loosens his arms as he helps her settle back on the floor. He keeps a hold of her hand, and then turns away from Chris just as he comes within range.

“Really? Fucking petty,” he hears the other man grumble, and Tim takes a deep breath before spinning around, his eyes narrowed as he considers exactly what he can say in a room full of kindergarteners. 

“Excuse me? I’m not the one —”

“Children!”

Tim turns around, his teeth clicking as he snaps his jaw shut, to see that Lucy is talking to actual children, and not yelling at him and Chris. 

“Just stay away from me and my daughter,” he says, and then he takes Charlotte’s hand and leads her toward the carpet where Lucy is lining the kids up to get ready to board the bus. 

“Make sure you have your bus partner!” Lucy reminds the kids, and it’s a mad shuffle as all of the children scramble to find their partner. Charlotte lets go of Tim’s hand and then tentatively walks up to a little girl with pigtails. The other little girl grins, takes Charlotte’s hand, and then they walk back over to Tim. 

Tim smiles and kneels down in front of them. 

“Hi, I’m Charlotte’s daddy, Tim. What’s your name, sweetheart?”

“Brooklyn.”

“Bwook-wyn is my fwiend,” Charlotte says, and Tim loves her little voice so much, speech impediments and all. He loves hearing her talk and trying to say new words. 

He also loves that he’s picked a friend whose name has both of the letters she can’t say. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Brooklyn.”

Brooklyn shakes his hand, and Tim grins as he stands up. Lucy walks over to him and hands him a piece of paper.

“Your field trip group is just Charlotte and Brooklyn. I thought… Charlotte might have trouble in the aquarium. It’s dark and loud, and you might need your hands free to help calm her.”

“Thanks,” Tim says, and then he glares when he catches Chris rolling his eyes a few feet away. “Lucy. I’m going to throat punch him.”

“Just wait until we’re off school grounds please,” Lucy whispers, and Tim laughs in surprise as she walks off to the next set of parent chaperones. 

Eventually everyone has their charges and Lucy has made sure that all of the children have their lunches, shoes, and jackets, and she marches them in a loud but orderly line  onto the bus. 

Chris sits one row behind Tim, Conrad next to him, and Tim sighs as he pulls Charlotte on his lap and settles Brooklyn next to him. 

It’s going to be a long day. 

_______________

Once they’re at the aquarium, Tim is able to distance himself a little bit from Chris. They’re split into two groups, one starting with the guided tour while the other walks unassisted through the lower level aquariums. Lucy’s group of kids (the troublemakers, Tim can tell, because she has each of the children by the hand and isn’t letting them more than a foot away from her at all times) goes with his, and he keeps sending her little smiles as Charlotte and Brooklyn ‘oooh’ and ‘awww’ over the fish. 

Chris is nowhere in sight, and Tim relaxes as they reach the penguin room. 

Charlotte squeals and runs ahead of him, pressing her hands and face to the glass, and Brooklyn joins her, bouncing up and down as one of the penguins jumps into the water and swims right by them. 

“We just did a study on penguins in class,” Lucy explains, walking up to Tim. He turns and smiles when he sees she’s still holding tightly onto the two children. One is a little boy who just looks like he would be bouncing off of the walls if Lucy weren’t holding onto him, and the other is a little girl who is definitely planning escape routes. 

Tim wonders briefly how she manages to teach so many little people with so much energy, and then smiles when the little boy reaches out to touch the glass of the penguin enclosure. 

“Bird,” he says, and Tim chuckles.

He’s not wrong. 

“Penguin,” Charlotte corrects, and the little boy frowns.

“Bird.”

“Penguin.”

“Bird!”

“Penguin!”

“You’re both right!” Lucy says cheerily, and then tugs on the hand of the little boy. “Let’s go see the birds on the other side of the room, Joshua!”

Tim laughs as Lucy walks across the room, and then joins Charlotte in watching the penguins swim and flap around. 

They visit the shark tank next, and Charlotte stares in wonder as they swim by the large, circular glass exhibit area.

“Ooooh,” she says, and Brooklyn laughs as she points to a smaller shark behind the big one. 

“Baby shark!” she cries, and then both she and Charlotte collapse into giggles, singing the Baby Shark song. Charlotte isn’t singing so much as humming and doing the motions, but it’s still amazing to see her interacting with another child like this, and Tim can’t stop smiling as they rejoin the rest of the group near the aquarium entrance to switch activities. He knows that petting the stingrays is on the guided tour, and he’s excited for Charlotte to experience it. 

“All right,” Lucy says, and Tim takes Charlotte and Brooklyn’s hands as they turn their attention to her. “We’re going to switch activities now. My group will be going on the tour, and those who just finished the tour will go through the self guided exhibits. We’ll meet back here around 11:30 for lunch. I gave all parent chaperones my phone number, so make sure to text if you need anything!”

Tim is watching the way Lucy’s eyes are sparkling as she talks, lit up by the blue lights in the aquarium, and he doesn’t notice Chris and Conrad walking up for several moments. 

He turns just in time to see Conrad poking Charlotte in the arm and saying something too quietly for Tim to hear. 

It’s amazing, he reflects later, how quickly everything can fall apart. 

One moment Tim is smiling, happy and excited by how well his daughter is doing, and the next she’s on the floor, screaming and rocking back and forth. 

It takes Tim a long time to realize what she’s screaming. 

He’s on the floor, wrapping his body around her and pulling her close, barely aware of Lucy taking Brooklyn’s hand and leading her to another parent volunteer, passing her off so that she’s safe and accounted for, and then she’s back, sitting down beside Tim and Charlotte and reaching out to put a hand on the little girl’s back. 

Tim tries not to notice how Chris is staring at them, but it’s difficult. 

“What happened?” Lucy asks, and Tim shrugs as he turns Charlotte in his arms. When he does she’s no longer burying her head in her knees, and her screaming grows louder and the word she’s chanting grows more clear. 

“MOMMY! M-mommy! Mommy!”

Tim glances up and glares at Chris and Conrad, because he just knows that the boy had said something to cause this. He doesn’t waste much time on them, however, because Charlotte is still hysterical in his arms and he needs to calm her. 

“She has never mentioned her mom,” Tim whispers, and Lucy nods as he continues to rub comforting circles on Charlotte’s back. “Do you miss your mommy, baby?” Tim asks, and his heart aches at the thought that Charlotte would miss the woman who had hurt her so badly, but he wants her to feel seen and heard, and if she is missing her mom, Tim will do his best to talk about her and help her process the loss. 

“Mommy!” she cries again, and Lucy makes a small, distressed noise. 

“Charlotte,” she whispers, and she’s opening her mouth to say more when Charlotte suddenly jerks up, her eyes wide as she turns around. She moves so quickly her head knocks into Tim’s jaw, and he curses quietly as his eyes water from the pain.

Charlotte turns to face Lucy, tears trailing slowly down her face. 

“Mommy,” she says again, and Lucy makes a confused noise. 

“You miss your mommy?” she guesses, but Charlotte shakes her head. 

“You. Mommy,” she says again, and then she’s climbing into Lucy’s arms and holding on tightly, her arms around Lucy’s neck and her head buried in her shoulder. “Mommy. Mommy. Mommy.”

Lucy stares at Tim, eyes wide, and then wraps her arms around Charlotte’s back. She holds on tight, her eyes moist with tears and her throat swollen with all that she can’t say. 

“Mommy,” Charlotte whispers, and Lucy swallows as Tim scoots closer and wraps his arms around both of them. 

Chapter Text

“Because that is what it means to be alive, on this infinitesimally spinning planet. It means you have cares. Doesn't it?”

― Kate DiCamillo, Louisiana's Way Home

After the field trip Tim watches as Chris walks directly into Principal Grey’s office, and he sighs deeply as he helps Lucy herd the rest of the children back into the classroom. Charlotte is still extra clingy, though she’d stopped screaming and had been able to enjoy the rest of the field trip, at least a little. She’d held tightly to Brooklyn’s hand the entire time, and hadn’t let either Tim or Lucy wander far from her without crying. 

Tim walks up to Lucy after she settles the kids onto the carpet with a movie, and he chuckles as he sees two kids immediately lay down and close their eyes. 

“We don’t even try to accomplish anything after a field trip. They’re exhausted,” she explains, and Tim nods. He’s seen Charlotte’s eyes fluttering closed as she clings to his leg, and he hopes she’ll take a nap, too. 

“Let me try and settle her on the carpet,” Lucy says, and Tim watches as she kneels down and reaches for Charlotte. The girl goes to her easily, murmuring mommy as she crawls into Lucy’s arms and lays her head on her shoulder. Lucy walks her over to the other kids and sits her down next to Brooklyn, and then slowly inches away once Charlotte takes Brooklyn’s hand and turns to watch the movie with heavy eyes. Lucy knows she’ll drop off to sleep soon, if she’s not interrupted, and she tiptoes back to Tim and sits down. 

“Thanks for helping me get them back in the room. Most parents bail once the field trip is over.”

“Not Chris,” Tim grumbles, and Lucy sighs. 

“I saw that, too. Let me deal with it, OK? I’ve been thinking, and… I may have come up with a way to spin what happened so that it doesn’t come back on us.”

Tim nods and sighs as he runs a hand through his hair. 

“We probably need… to talk. I mean, about what Charlotte said. And we need to talk with Charlotte, too, because it’s not … she can’t call you… that until after school ends, and …”

Lucy takes pity on Tim and puts a hand on his arm to stop his rambling. 

“I can come over after school,” she says, and Tim smiles as he blows out a breath. 

“Yeah. Please, that would be… that would be good. Charlotte will be excited. She’s missed her Woo-cy.”

Her mommy. 

Lucy smiles and nods, and then Tim stands awkwardly. He brushes his hands on his jeans, glances to where Charlotte is definitely fast asleep on the carpet, and then heads toward the door. 

“You’re sure you don’t want me there when you talk to Grey?” he asks, and Lucy nods. 

“Yeah. He’s on our side, Tim. We just have to give him enough plausible deniability. He doesn’t care if we’re together, he cares for my job because Chris could mess everything up for me. I think… I think I can spin this, though.”

“OK,” Tim whispers, and he gives in easily because he trusts her. He smiles as he opens the door of the classroom and then adds, “I’ll see you at car pick up?”

“Of course,” Lucy says, and she smiles and waves as she closes the door gently behind him, mindful of the sleeping kindergarteners behind her. 

__________________

Tim has settled Charlotte on the couch with a juice box and a snack, and has just started tackling the dishes in the sink when there’s a knock on his door. He smiles, dries his hands, and walks into the living room to see Charlotte staring at the door as if it might try and bite her. 

“It’s just Ms. Lucy,” he tells her, and her wary look transforms instantly. She grins and jumps off the couch, running up to Tim and winding around his legs as he tries to get to the door without tripping over her. 

“Mommy!” Charlotte yells the second it’s open, and Tim chuckles as she launches her little body at Lucy. Lucy just barely manages to catch her, and then she chuckles as she kisses Charlotte’s cheek and settles her on her hip. 

“Hey, Charlotte! How are you feeling?”

Charlotte shrugs and then yawns, and Tim knows she’s going to crash after dinner. 

“We’re still a little emotional,” Tim says, though he thinks the nap that she’d taken after the field trip had helped. 

“That’s OK,” Lucy reassures her, and she walks inside as Tim closes the door behind them. He leads them into the kitchen. Lucy settles Charlotte on the counter and then takes a seat at the bar stool in front of her. 

“Mommy,” Charlotte says again, and Lucy sighs as she turns to look at Tim. She meets his eyes and smiles softly before nodding toward where Charlotte is staring at them each in turn. She wants him to take the lead on this, because Charlotte is his daughter and she doesn’t want to overstep. Every time Charlotte calls her mommy, though, she melts just a little bit more. 

She wants to be this little girl’s mommy desperately. 

“Hey, baby,” Tim begins, and Lucy reaches over and takes his hand into hers under the table where Charlotte can’t see. “Lucy and I wanted to talk to you about something, if that’s OK?”

Charlotte nods and then sticks her fingers in her mouth. She swings her little feet back and forth where they’re hanging from the edge of the counter, and then holds her free arm out for Lucy. 

Lucy pulls her into her arms and tucks the little girl’s head into the crease between her shoulder and neck, and runs her fingers through her hair while Tim begins talking. 

“You called Ms. Lucy mommy today,” Tim starts, and Charlotte nods. 

“Conwad said I don’t has a mommy,” she whispers, and Tim should definitely not want to punch a child, but he does, at least a little bit. His anger is overshadowed by sadness when he realizes, in a sudden burst of clarity, what had brought Conrad's comment on. 

During the second part of the field trip, the guided tour, the lady had shown them a dolphin family, which Charlotte had been so excited about. The tour guide had talked extensively about the mommy dolphin, the daddy dolphin, and the baby dolphin, and Tim wonders what type of human Chris is, that his child would listen to that presentation, and then use what he’d heard to go and tease another child. 

“But I does,” Charlotte continues, though the words are muffled around her fingers. “Ms. Woo-cy is my mommy. I wove her.”

“I love you too, baby,” Lucy whispers, and she has to close her eyes to hide the tears she can feel forming in her eyes. Tim watches them both and loves them so fiercely that all he can do is stand from his stool and wrap his arms around them both. 

He holds them for a few minutes, breathing deeply, and then pulls back. He sits down and then meets Charlotte’s eyes. 

“I love that you love Ms. Lucy, and that she loves you. I love you both very much, too. But while Ms. Lucy is your teacher… you can’t call her mommy, baby.”

Charlotte looks confused, her little eyebrows scrunching together as she sucks on her fingers. 

“Why?”

Lucy jumps in, trying to explain it in a way that Charlotte will understand while still impressing the importance of this on her. 

“Because… the other kids don’t get to call me mommy. Brooklyn doesn’t call me mommy, right?”

“But she has a mommy,” Charlotte whispers, and Tim wants to focus on how she’s speaking so much, but he doesn’t want to interrupt. “I want a mommy.”

Lucy turns to look at Tim, and she doesn’t know if she has the heart to tell Charlotte that she can’t. 

“Ms. Lucy can be your mommy, just… not at school, baby,” Tim says. “Would that be OK? Can she be ‘mommy’ when we’re at home, and ‘Ms. Lucy’ at school?”

Charlotte thinks about Tim’s proposition for several moments, her brows scrunched and her lips pursed around her fingers. 

“Woo-cy come over more? Miss her,” she counter offers, and Tim laughs. 

“I think we can work that out,” he says, glancing at Lucy, and she nods. 

They only have 29 days. 

They can make it work. 

“Woo-cy at school?” Charlotte clarifies, and Tim nods, reaching out to brush his hand over her soft curls. 

“Yeah. You have to call her Lucy at school.”

“Mommy?”

Lucy nods and brushes the hair away from her forehead before kissing her sweet, soft skin. 

“I can be mommy at home,” she whispers, and she knows, as she glances up at Tim and meets his eyes, that they need to talk, too. 

Mommy. 

Home. 

These are dangerous thoughts to be having, she knows, because she wants to be Charlotte’s mommy, and she wants this to be her home, her family. 

“Let’s make dinner,” Tim suggests, and Lucy nods, swallowing and pushing those thoughts away for now. She knows that Charlotte will crash pretty quickly after dinner, and that they can talk then, but for now, she’s happy to help Tim prepare vegetables and make brownies with Charlotte while Tim sears the chicken. 

They eat together at the table, laughing and talking, and Lucy smiles softly as Charlotte starts dropping toward her plate, her eyes closing and her hair falling into her broccoli. 

“Let me put her to bed,” Tim whispers, and Lucy nods. She begins picking up their plates and bringing them to the sink as Tim lifts Charlotte from her chair gently, tucking her against his shoulder and walking toward the bedroom. He doesn’t make it far before Charlotte makes a noise, though, and whimpers, “Mommy.”

Lucy leaves the plates in the sink and goes to Charlotte immediately. 

She helps Tim change her into pajamas and brush her unruly hair before helping her climb into bed. Tim wraps the blankets around her while Charlotte reaches for Lucy’s hand.

“Old mommy hurt me,” she whispers, and Lucy sniffles as she brushes her fingers across Charlotte’s sleep-flushed cheek. 

“I’ll never hurt you,” she whispers, and Charlotte smiles as she nuzzles into Lucy’s hand. 

“I wove you.”

“Love you, too, baby,” she murmurs, and then she and Tim take turns kissing her goodnight and then they back out of the room, closing the door softly. 

The second Charlotte’s door is closed, Lucy collapses into Tim’s arms. He holds her for a long time, letting her process and think and cry a little bit, and then he herds her into his bedroom, closing the door behind them. 

Lucy almost protests, because there are dishes to do, and she’s sure they left a mess in the kitchen, but Tim shushes her and helps her take off her shirt and her jeans and her bra, and it’s not even sexual the way he’s touching her. His eyes are filled with love and devotion as he helps her into one of his large t-shirts and then crawls into bed and holds his arms open. 

And how is Lucy supposed to say no to that?

Tim pulls her under the covers with him and then wraps her in his arms, kisses her lips, and then presses their foreheads together. 

“Are you OK with all of this?” he whispers, and Lucy smiles as he elaborates. “With Charlotte calling you mommy. That’s… a huge step. And she’ll understand if you’re not comfortable with it. We haven’t been dating that long, and I don’t want to push you in… any way. I want you in our lives in any way you want to be involved, but you don’t have to —”

Lucy cuts him off with a kiss, because otherwise she’s worried he’ll just keep rambling forever. 

“Yes, Tim. I’m OK with it. I want to be Charlotte’s mommy, if that’s… if that’s what you want.”

Tim nods, speechless and breathless, and then sighs happily as Lucy lays her head on his chest. 

“We can talk more in the morning,” she says, though she knows she’ll have to rush out the door fairly early. She really needs to start leaving some clothes at Tim’s place so she can go straight to school, but she hadn’t planned this.

“Come over for dinner again tomorrow,” Tim suggests, and then, “And bring an overnight bag.”

Lucy smiles as she buries her head in his chest and breathes in his scent. 

She knows it’s a little dangerous, what they’re doing. 

But… there are only 29 more days, and then she can spend as much time with Tim and Charlotte as she wants. 

Chapter Text

“Her words sounded the way all those things made him feel, as if the world, the real world, had been punched through, so that he could see something wonderful and dazzling on the other side of it.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Tiger Rising

28 Days until Kindergarten Graduation

Tim: You can bring some stuff to leave at my house so you don’t have to bolt so quickly next time. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: That would be great! I’ll bring a bag of things over tonight. 😊 I really wanted to stay before breakfast, but I can’t be late to school.

Tim: I know, Lu. Thanks for staying until Charlotte woke up. She would have been sad if you’d left before she could say goodbye. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Of course. 

Tim: By the way, we didn’t have time to talk this morning. What exactly did you tell Grey, and do you think Chris will cause any more issues?

Lucy Chen ☀️: Chris was still there after school, actually. He just waited in the office until Grey called me up. I told them both that it’s not uncommon for kids to call me ‘mommy’, especially when they’re upset. It happens all the time, actually. I’ve been called mommy, daddy, nana… pretty much everything in the book. And I explained that Charlotte, who doesn’t have a mommy, probably just latched onto me as the most consistent female presence in her life. Grey was looking at me like he knew I was full of shit, but he didn’t say anything, and it’s not like Chris can prove we’re dating or breaking any rules. 

Tim: So you think we’re OK?

Lucy Chen ☀️: I do. I don’t think the incident at the aquarium will cause us any trouble. I probably should limit sleepovers until school is out, though… and we definitely can’t go on any more public dates until after Kinder Graduation on the 29th.

Tim: You realize that means I can’t wake you up like I did today, then, right…?

Lucy Chen ☀️: Truly devastating. That was… a very nice way to wake up. 

Tim: Next time you sleep over, I promise I’ll do it again. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: … fuck it. I’ll stay tonight, too. 

Tim. That’s what I thought. 👅

Lucy Chen ☀️: Oh my god, why do I love you again?

Tim: I don’t know. You do, though. You already told me. You can’t take it back now. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I would never. You and Charlotte are my favorite people on the planet. 

Tim: ❤️❤️❤️

Lucy Chen ☀️: Sap. Love you. 

Tim: Love you, too. See you at car pick-up.

___________________

21 Days Until Kindergarten Graduation

Lucy Chen ☀️: Charlotte hit Conrad today. Just a heads up; Grey will be calling.

Tim: Good. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Please don’t say that when Grey calls you. 😅

Tim: I’ll behave myself, I promise. Will Grey just call me, or do I need to come into the office after I pick Charlotte up?

Lucy Chen ☀️: She didn’t leave a mark, she just hit him in the back. So honestly she’ll probably just get a slap on the wrist. There’s no reason for you to have to come in.

Tim: OK, good. Do you know what Conrad was doing that precipitated her hitting him?

Lucy Chen ☀️: He was teasing Brooklyn and pushing her around. I was already headed over to deal with it, but apparently I wasn’t moving fast enough. Charlotte is… defensive of those she loves. She hit him on the back and screamed at him until he ran away. 

Tim: My feisty girl. I love her so much. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I talked to both of them, and I reported Conrad for bullying when I called the office, too. Charlotte shouldn’t have hit him, but Conrad has given Brooklyn a rough time all year. This isn’t his first write up.

Tim: I can’t wait until you’re just my girlfriend and not my daughter’s teacher so we can talk shit about your students. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I would never. 

Tim: Uh huh. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: What? I’m innocent. 😇😇😇

Tim: I love you, so I won’t call you a lying liar who lies. Will I see you tonight?

Lucy Chen ☀️: Probably not tonight. I have a ton of work to get done with the end of the year coming. Friday?

Tim: Looking forward to it. I love you. ❤️

Lucy Chen ☀️: I love that the heart is the only emoji you use. 

Tim: Sometimes words aren’t enough. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: God, you’re my favorite. Love you, too. ❤️❤️❤️

Lucy Chen ☀️ has updated your contact name: Tim ❤️

___________________

15 Days Until Kindergarten Graduation

Lucy Chen ☀️: OH MY GOD. 😱 😱😱

Tim ❤️: Are you OK? What’s wrong?

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’m fine. So, I’m at the board meeting, right??

Tim ❤️: Yes…

Lucy Chen ☀️: Grey and I just finished our presentation, and then when it was open forum, GUESS WHO WALKED UP?

Tim ❤️: I’m gonna fucking kill him. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Got it in one. So, Chris comes up to the mic and starts talking about how we need to have more ‘robust’ special education programs. He thinks that our students needing services should ‘be in the regular education classroom less’ and ‘be around their same-leveled peers’ as if we should segregate our school and keep those with specials needs out of the classroom! 

… Tim ❤️ is typing… 

… Tim ❤️ is typing… 

… Tim ❤️ is typing… 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’ll call you after the meeting, babe. I know you’re upset. Don’t worry, he was shot down by literally everyone here. 

Tim ❤️: I am shaking with anger right now. You know he’s doing this because of Charlotte. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I know, Tim. But he’s wrong. He’s so wrong. Charlotte brings so much to our classroom. And yes, she needs a little extra help, but Chris is an idiot if he thinks our class would be better off without her. Everyone loves Charlotte. She’s such a little ray of sunshine. 

Tim ❤️: Fuck. What a fucking bastard. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: On the bright side, if there can be one to this… no one on the board is taking him seriously anymore. You should have seen the looks the other board members gave him. He’ll still stay on the board, of course, because his family is … very influential in this town. But he lost a lot of respect tonight. One of our board members has a daughter with down syndrome, and another has a son with autism. He shot himself in the foot tonight. 

Tim ❤️: I’d like to shoot him somewhere a little more vital, if you don’t mind. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Want me to come over tonight? After the meeting? I have all my stuff there, so I wouldn’t have to run out in the morning. 

Tim ❤️: I would love that. I would love to see you, and hold you, and make love to you tonight, and then we can make pancakes with Charlotte in the morning. She would love to see her mommy. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’m blushing in a board meeting now. But that all sounds wonderful.

Tim ❤️: I’m still mad at him.

Lucy Chen ☀️: I know. That’s partly why I’m coming over. I can be… very distracting.

Tim ❤️: Yes you can. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’ll even do that thing you like so much.

Tim ❤️: Well hurry up, or I’m going to get started without you. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: 9 more minutes until the meeting lets out, and at least 10 to your apartment. Think you can have Charlotte in bed by then?

Tim ❤️: Challenge accepted. Love you.

Lucy Chen ☀️: Love you, too. See you soon, baby. 

____________________

9 Days until Kindergarten Graduation

Tim ❤️: So, Charlotte’s Graduation is next Friday. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Why yes, I believe it is. 

Tim ❤️: I was thinking… Tamara is available that night. And she said she’s done with college classes for the semester, so she’s … open to watching Charlotte overnight sometimes. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Oh really? 🙃

Tim ❤️: So I was thinking… would you like to go to dinner with me on the 29th, Lu? 

Lucy Chen ☀️: That depends. Do I get to take you home afterward?

Tim ❤️: I mean, it is only our third date… that’s kind of forward.

Lucy Chen ☀️: 🍆😺

Tim ❤️: I don’t know what that means. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Oh my god, Tim.

Tim ❤️: I googled it. Yes. Yes. Very much yes.

Lucy Chen ☀️: I mean, if you think that’s too forward…

Tim ❤️: Fuck that. It’ll be our first night without a kindergartener less than ten yards away. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I have neighbors, Tim. 

Tim ❤️: Tell them to buy earplugs. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: You sound awfully sure of yourself. 

Tim ❤️: 9 days. You’ll see. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: It’s a date, then. 

Tim ❤️:  👅🍑

Lucy Chen ☀️: Oh my god get off of the internet, old man. 

Tim ❤️:  Did I do it wrong?

Lucy Chen ☀️: I mean… not necessarily. Just not sure you realize what you’re offering. 👀

Tim ❤️:  Oh, I realize. 

Tim ❤️: Oh shit Charlotte just threw up. I have to go. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: So I WON’T see her at school tomorrow. 

Tim ❤️:  Sorry. Love you, babe. Come over tonight if you don’t mind a little puke.

Lucy Chen ☀️: I absolutely cannot get sick during the last week of school. You are officially quarantined. Go deal with puke, and when Charlotte is asleep tonight … FaceTime me, if you want. 😉 We can finish our conversation. It was just getting interesting, after all.

Tim ❤️:  Fuck yes. See you soon.

__________________ 

1 Day until Kindergarten Graduation

Lucy Chen ☀️: I can’t sleep. 

Tim ❤️: Me either. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I’m so excited. For a lot of reasons. The end of the year is always bittersweet, but I love kindergarten graduation. It’s literally the cutest thing ever. But I’m also excited because tomorrow we can officially be together, and I can be Charlotte’s mommy, and we can go on dates in public. We can take outings together as a family. I want to take Charlotte to the pool and teach her to swim, and maybe we can all take a mini vacation this summer? I know that’s fast, we haven’t been dating that long, but…

Tim ❤️: It sounds wonderful, Lucy. I would love to go on vacation with you and Charlotte. Where do you want to go?

Lucy Chen ☀️: I would love to go to the beach, but I know it’s not your favorite. 

Tim ❤️: I have nothing against the beach, it’s the water. I won’t get in, but I can build a mean sandcastle. And we could pick somewhere with other activities, too. Maybe somewhere that has hiking nearby, too, or an amusement park… we can find something that works for both of us. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: That sounds perfect. I love building sandcastles. I can take Charlotte in the ocean so you don’t have to, and you can cheer us on from the shore. 

Tim ❤️: I love it. I’ll start researching some places. Charlotte would love the beach. For some unknown reason, she loves sand.

Lucy Chen ☀️: It’s a texture thing.

Tim ❤️: We can look at places together sometime when you come over. I bet… oh, god, Charlotte would love Disney World. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: She would. 

Tim ❤️: So would you. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: You would hate it, though.

Tim ❤️:  Not if I’m with my two favorite girls. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I love you so much. 

Tim ❤️:  I love you, too, Lu. I can’t wait to take you out on a real date tomorrow night. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: I can’t wait either. 

Tim ❤️: I can’t believe… less than six months ago, when Charlotte showed up. I can’t believe how far we’ve come. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: She’s doing so well, Tim.

Tim ❤️: I know. I’m so proud of her. And I’m so thankful she was assigned to your class. I think back to that first day in Grey’s office, when I was ready to pull my hair out… and I remember feeling a sense of calm when I saw you go sit with Charlotte at that tiny table. I thought… oh, everything is going to be fine. It was the first time I’d felt like everything was going to be OK since Charlotte showed up. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Tim…

Tim ❤️: You were exactly what she needed. You were exactly what I needed, too. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: And maybe I didn’t know it yet, but you and Charlotte were perfect for me, too.

Tim ❤️: I love you. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: And I love you.

Tim ❤️: Try and get some sleep, baby. You have a busy day tomorrow. I’ll walk Charlotte in; we have a gift for you.

Lucy Chen ☀️: Aww. You didn’t have to, Tim.

Tim ❤️: I know. But we wanted to, to thank you for everything you’ve done for her this year. 

Lucy Chen ☀️: Okay. 😊

Tim ❤️: Goodnight, Lu.

Lucy Chen ☀️: Goodnight, Tim. I’ll see you in the morning. 

Chapter Text

“She was terribly pleased, because she had always, secretly, deep within her heart, believed that she could fly. And now here she was, doing what she had long suspected she could do, and she could not deny that it was gratifying in the extreme.”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Magician's Elephant

0 Days until Kindergarten Graduation

Tim holds Charlotte’s hand as they walk into the school together for the last time before summer break. He remembers the first time they’d walked these halls, led by Lucy, to see Charlotte’s classroom. He remembers the Calm Corner, and the Sad Shark, and the way that she clung to him on the first day as Lucy had sung the good morning song to the class. 

He smiles, and walks with Charlotte into Ms. Lucy’s classroom for the last time. 

It’s bittersweet. 

They get to have Lucy in their lives, but Charlotte won’t have her as a teacher anymore. Tim knows that Jackson will be great for her, but he’s going to miss Lucy’s classroom and the way she sings to her children and how much she loves them. 

“Good morning,” Lucy greets them, and Tim smiles at her as Charlotte hangs her backpack up all on her own. He watches as his little girl walks to her own desk, gets out her crayon box, and begins to color on the paper Lucy had set out. 

She’s so independent, and Tim is so fucking proud of her. 

“Here,” Tim says, and he holds up the gift bag that he’s still holding. Lucy grins and blushes as she takes it from him, and Tim nods to indicate that she should open it. 

Lucy pushes the tissue paper to the side and pulls out a small photo frame. Inside is a picture of her with Charlotte and Tim, taken in front of the Christmas tree when Tim had insisted that she be in one of them, too. Tim has written a short message on the back, and Lucy sniffles as she reads the inscription. 

You’ve been part of our little family for longer than we both realized. We love you, Ms. Woo-cy. 

Tim has signed it, and then below Tim’s name is Charlotte’s, written in shaky, purple crayon. 

“Thank you,” she whispers, and Tim smiles as she walks over to her desk and hangs it up next to the pictures of her family and friends. Tim watches her, his hands in his pockets and a soft look on his face, and then turns his attention when Charlotte loudly calls for him. 

“Daddy!”

He goes easily.

He’ll always go when one of his girls needs him. 

“Yeah, baby?”

“Looks what I made.”

Charlotte holds up a paper with a rainbow on it, grinning proudly. She’s lost one of her front teeth, and it’s the cutest fucking thing Tim has ever seen. He kisses her loudly on the cheek and then takes the paper from her gently. 

“We’re gonna hang this one on the fridge, baby,” he murmurs, and Charlotte blushes as she beams proudly. 

Tim picks up a crayon and starts coloring with her, and he’s so engrossed in helping her draw their little family (with him, her, and Ms. Woo-cy) that he doesn’t notice when Chris walks in. 

“Happy last day of school!” Chris says loudly, and Tim turns and watches as Conrad hands Lucy a small gift bag as well. Lucy thanks him and leans down to wrap the boy in a hug, and then, when prompted, opens the gift. 

“Oh, wow… thank you, Mr. Sanford, thank you Conrad,” she says, and Tim can see it’s a gift card, but from the look on Lucy’s face it must be a big one. 

“You can call me Chris,” he says, and he’s smiling as he eyes the gift card in Lucy’s hands. “It’s the last day of school, after all.”

Lucy is opening her mouth to say something, probably to politely redirect Chris to a safer topic, when the bell rings and Principal Grey’s voice comes over the intercom. 

“All Kindergarten teachers, students, and families, please begin making your way to the auditorium. Kindergarten Graduation will begin in ten minutes. Congratulations to all of our graduating Kindergarteners! Everyone here at Sunshine Elementary is so proud of you, and we know you will continue to do amazing things.”

Lucy smiles and begins lining the children up. Tim waves to Charlotte and then follows the rest of the parents into the auditorium. He snags a seat near the front so he can take pictures and cheer Charlotte on as she crosses the stage, and tries very hard not to roll his eyes when Chris sits a few chairs down from him. 

The ceremony is, in a word, adorable. 

Grey opens by walking up to the mic and talking about everything the children had done during the year, such as donating and filling Christmas Shoeboxes for those in need, their Kindergarten Musical, and their first ever field trip. He talks at length about the three kindergarten teachers and how hard they’ve worked and how fiercely they’ve loved the children in their care. He tears up a little when he tells the story of watching his daughter cross the very same stage, many years ago, and Tim listens intently to every word. 

He knows that this is a huge milestone for Charlotte, even if she’s going to repeat Kindergarten next year. He’s proud of all she’s accomplished and how far she’s come. 

“And now, we’ll begin calling names. When you see your student come to receive their Kindergarten Diploma, you can wave and cheer, but please wait until after the ceremony to take pictures, please. We’ll leave out all the props for photos when we’re done.”

Grey turns back and raises an eyebrow at someone that Tim can’t see, and then faces the crowd with a big grin as he begins to call names. 

“Asher Adams.”

A teeny little boy that Tim thinks might be even smaller than Charlotte bolts across the stage, running directly into Grey’s legs. The crowd chuckles as Grey leans down to make sure that he stays on his feet, and then hands him a little, rolled-up diploma. Asher grins and then runs to the other side of the stage where a para is helping the kids sit on the risers for a group photo when they’re done. 

“Laura Allen.”

There’s cheering from a corner of the auditorium, and Tim turns around to see a whole family, mom and dad and grandparents and siblings, and he feels a little bad that he’s the only one here for Charlotte. 

“Charlotte Bradford.”

Oh, well. 

Tim Bradford has never backed down when faced with a challenge. 

Charlotte stumbles out from behind the curtain, eyes wide and gown too long, and Tim jumps to his feet, waving and whistling and cheering. Charlotte giggles and jumps around on the stage with him, waving. 

“Daddy!” she cries, and Tim blows her a kiss as she bounces toward Grey. “Daddy!”

“Hi, baby!” he yells, and he can hear the other parents chuckling behind him, but damn it, if he’s the only one she has, he’s going to make a spectacle. “I love you, Charlotte Marie!”

“I wove you, Daddy, Mommy!” she yells, and Tim can see Lucy peeking out from behind the curtain, waving as Charlotte finally reaches Grey. 

He shakes her tiny hand, gives her the diploma, and Tim watches, tears in his eyes, as Charlotte is seated next to another little kindergartener on the top row of risers. 

After Charlotte, there are at least 50 more children who walk across the stage, but Tim only has eyes for his little girl. 

“And now, I’m going to turn it over to Ms. McGrady, Ms. Chen, and Mr. West. They have a few awards they’d like to give out for the 2021-2022 school year.”

Tim sits up straighter; Lucy hadn’t told him about this part. 

Ms. McGrady goes first, and then Mr. West, and by the time Lucy steps up to the mic Tim is vibrating with excitement.

“I’ve given out a lot of awards at our monthly assemblies this year, but there are three more I’d like to pass out now, to three students who have shown exceptional growth, character, and perseverance. The first award I'd like to give out is the Kindness Award. I give this award every year to a child who has shown kindness to others. Not just once, or not just a big gesture,” Lucy says, and Tim swears he sees her eyes flicker to Chris and he wonders what she really thinks of the gift he’d gotten her. “I give this award to a student whose small acts of kindness throughout the entire year have made our classroom a better place. This year, the Kindness Award is going to Brooklyn Smith.”

Brooklyn squeals with happiness and runs to the front of the room to receive her award, and Lucy leans down, kneeling on the floor as she hugs her. 

Tim can see her whispering in Brooklyn’s ear, but he can’t hear what she’s saying. 

He has an idea, though, because he’s spent a lot of time around Brooklyn and she’s a wonderful little girl. 

Once Brooklyn has taken her seat (and has been hugged within an inch of her life by Charlotte, her proud best friend), Lucy turns back to the crowd. 

“The second award I’d like to give out is the Leadership Award. I give this award to a child who is a leader to others, both in what they say and what they do. This award is going to a little boy who has been consistently kind, compassionate, and has helped others develop good social habits over the past year. He’s always first to help if someone needs it, and the first to offer a hug if someone is hurt. He has a huge, kind heart, and I am so proud of him. Bentley Collier, come over here, sweetheart.”

A little brown haired, blue eyed boy runs up to Lucy and hugs her, and Lucy laughs brightly as she leans down and hugs him back. She passes him his award and then they both smile as Grey takes a picture. 

“My last award is the Perseverance Award. It’s a big word, but we talk a lot in our class about perseverance. It means never giving up, even when things are hard. It means failing, and failing, and failing … and then getting right back up and trying again. It means knowing that you might have to work twice as hard, or three times as hard as another child, but doing it anyway. This year I am so proud to be able to give my Perseverance Award to a little girl who has known more heartache in her life than many of us ever will. But she comes to school with a smile, she has a big heart and the warmest hugs, and I am proud to be her Ms. Woo-cy. This award is going to Charlotte Bradford.”

Brooklyn jumps up and begins clapping for her friend, while Charlotte stares in confusion, her fingers in her mouth and her bright blue noise dampening headphones over her ears. 

“You won, Charlotte! Go to Ms. Lucy!”

“Woo-cy?” Charlotte asks, and Brooklyn nods. 

Charlotte still doesn’t seem to understand, but Brooklyn, a huge smile on her face, takes her hand and leads her across the stage. 

Lucy falls to her knees on the stage and envelopes Charlotte in a hug, and the mic is still close enough to Lucy that Tim can hear every word she says. 

“You are the strongest, bravest, most resilient little girl ever, Charlotte. I am so proud of you. You’re going to do amazing things.”

Charlotte leans up on her tiptoes and kisses Lucy on the cheek. 

“I wove you.”

“I love you, too, little one,” Lucy murmurs, and then she hands Charlotte her award, hugs her close to her side, and lets Grey take a picture. 

By the time Brooklyn leads Charlotte back to their spot, Tim is sobbing. Tears are rolling silently down his cheeks, and his heart feels so full it aches. 

Chris mutters something about playing favorites, and Tim doesn’t even feel a little bit bad when he kicks him in the shin as hard as he can. 

Chris glares, but in an auditorium full of children, teachers, and parents, there’s not much he can do. 

“That concludes our Kindergarten Graduation. Once you’ve taken pictures and have said goodbye to your children’s teachers, you can take them to class, gather their things, and start Summer Vacation. Thank you, Sunshine families. We are so grateful for each and every one of your, your support of your students and their teachers, and for being here today. Have a great summer!”

General chaos erupts in the auditorium, but all Tim is aware of is Charlotte squealing happily as she runs to the edge of the stage. She leaps off and into Tim’s arms, not even caring about the three foot drop. 

She knows her daddy will always catch her. 

Tim kisses her cheeks and her forehead and her lips and then spins her in circles until she’s giggling so hard she can barely breathe. 

“Love you, Charlotte,” he murmurs, and Charlotte grins, her cheeks pink. 

“Wove you, daddy!”

Tim settles her on his hip (and he knows he’s going to have to stop soon; she’s getting so big), and then saunters over to where Lucy is standing in the corner, grinning and flushed with happiness and excitement. 

He stalks right up to her, cups her cheek in his hand, and then kisses her. 

Lucy squeaks in surprise and then melts into him, wrapping her arms around his waist as she kisses her for far longer than is probably appropriate. 

Tim pulls back, grins, and (after glancing back to make sure Chris is watching), loudly says, “Lucy, now that you are no longer Charlotte’s teacher, will you go out to dinner with me?”

Lucy laughs, bright and happy, and then nods, tears in her eyes.

“Yes. I would love to!”

Tim laughs and then hugs her, and they stand like that for several minutes, in the middle of an auditorium filled with parents and teachers and children. Tim kisses her again, and he knows that Chris is glaring at them (and Grey is shaking his head in fond exasperation), but he doesn’t even care.

It’s been a long journey, and Tim knows that they have so much in front of them still yet to navigate, but he knows that whatever happens, they’ll do it together. 

“Wove you mommy daddy,” Charlotte whispers.

“We love you, too, baby girl,” Lucy says, her voice a contented sigh. 

“You are.. so loved, Charlotte,” Tim adds, and then he holds his family even closer as the auditorium begins to empty out. 

He has everything he never knew he needed, everything he’d never even dreamed of needing, right here in his arms. 

fin.

“But answer me this: how can a story end happily if there is no love?”

― Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane