Archive of Our Own ^beta

„Don’t take my stuff !“ Tony roared as he slammed Thor in the side with full force, pushing him away to defend his property. Not that any less force would have done it, even at this level Tony didn’t leave a dent in the thunder god’s armor or messed up one strand of his hair. Maybe the latter was not possible anyway since Asgardian hair products were just too godly to let that happen.

The said property, named Loki, was left standing there alone in the woods, feeling in equal measure bewildered and amused.

“Midgardians sometimes show such wonderfully strange behavior. Why do they accuse their god of ‘moving in mysterious ways’ when the act far more ‘mysterious’?” Loki thought and began to wonder what Tony Stark meant with that. Sure, he defeated him and took him prisoner – of course only because he wanted to be taken – but what made him pronounce his claim?

The battle of iron and thunder began, illuminating the forest around them in the most beautiful colors while recklessly destroying it.

The god of mischief sat down, placing his elbow on a flat rock next to him to rest his head on his hand. The situated position was perfect to have a good view of the battleground, Thor couldn’t have dropped him off at a better place, he thought absently. His eyes wandered from one man to the other, studying their movements.

As expected, Thor was all about brute force and intimidating presence. Figuring out Tony’s fighting style was a bit harder though. For now he was doing surprisingly well avoiding his brother’s attacks which could easily squash him. Even the strongest kind of metal was like tin to Thor.

Then, the man they called ‘Cap’ joined and it became more interesting for a while until it was clear that all he wanted was to mediate the argument instead of fighting. How tedious. Of course, they ignored him and his only chance to persuade them was to join the tussle.

Time passed and the battle became more serious, but less interesting. Watching men fight had its own charm, but it was a lot more fun if they were half naked. Any oiled up. Like in this TV series his already enslaved ‘Asgardian – Midgardian interpreters’ showed him. It seemed interesting and he considered making such battles socially accepted again when he was the ruler of this realm. Which would be soon. Maybe Tony could be one of the first volunteers.

Watching the battle go on without much progress soon bored him, mainly because Loki was just the catalyst and not the center of attention. So he decided to join.

With a flick of is wrist, he teleported down, appearing between them, effectively halting the battle. All eyes were on him.

“My, My, first two handsome men fight over me and then even a third one joins.” He overdramatically placed a hand above his heart “I am truly flattered.” Then he sighed and held his other hand out like a lady “So who of you gentleman would be so kind to escort me back to our noble vehicle?”

The two Avengers with a more a quirky humor just grinned, while Steve blushed a little, looking irritated.

The two of them exchanged glances and stepped forward towards Loki, Steve just assumed they had some kind of strategy and followed a few steps behind.

Instead of picking up Loki, they walked right past him into the woods – or what was left of them – effectively ignoring him.

Again, Loki was left standing there, ignored and incredibly offended. His still stretched out hand was trembling in anger. Not getting the attention he deserves, even from his enemies, was hard to bear for his ego. Maybe showing more skin would have helped.

“W-What…? This is in unacceptable!” his voice wavered.

From a good distance away, Tony stopped and spoke loud enough so he could be heard from a distance. “You know what, Thor, I think that guy is kinda queer, you can have him. Beside, you have better experience with him anyway.”

Before the self-proclaimed genius could fully turn to face his opponent, a heavy hand clasped his shoulder and made him sway in the middle of the movement. The owner of the said hand looked him straight in the eyes and offered him a big smile. “Indeed, It would be pleasure. It is for the benefit of all that I, who can handle him best and who handled him well for years, takes care of him. Thank you, Tony Stark, your judgement is wise.”

Steve eyed them suspiciously. Where they really interested in Loki or just good at playing his games? He would certainly not take this any further. The trickster was confusing him in more ways he wanted to admit.

Thor went back to collect his lost brother. But instead of taking his still waiting hand, he wrapped his arm around him. It almost looked like a friendly gesture, if there wasn’t this firm grip on Loki’s shoulder which made him grind his teeth and turn his gaze to the ground. Being this close to his former brother didn’t suit him at all, but it was a sacrifice he was willing to pay.

One the way back Thor kept being that close to him all the time, as if he never would leave his side again.

Loki was pouting and shooting daggers at Tony during the whole flight, for simply claiming him and shortly dismissing him afterwards. The part of his mind that was not busy hating Tony was already plotting his sweet revenge.

***

When Loki claimed the Stark Tower – which was surely no coincidence – and Tony finally showed up, Loki decided to approach the subject again.

He calmly let the genius finish his tedious speech first – really, who needed to hear that nonsense before his ultimate victory – before initiating the first phase of his plot.

“Earlier you called me ‘your stuff’…” his voice trailed off and eyes became dark.

“Yeah, well, technically you were my prisoner for a while and-“

When Loki slowly stepped closer, piercing him with his cold, blue eyes, Tony knew he had to come up with something better. His mind began to race.

“Wait. Wait! I got it now, surely this is a misunderstanding, I mean, I had no idea that this was something like a marriage proposal in Asgard. Look, I take it back, you are really pretty and insane…ly attractive and all but… uh.. just not my type, sorry. No hard feelings!”

Ok, maybe this was a bad move, but it made Loki stop and grimace. Shortly after, a movement with his hand that could only be described as a ‘facepalm’ followed. Cool, they had that in Asgard, too, Tony thought.

“Your assumptions are false and foolish, Stark.”

The god sighted and collected himself again to come closer. Dangerously close, about half an arm’s length away from his opponent. With a presence like that looming over him, the scientist didn’t dare to move.

“Actually, I-”A finger on his lips shushed Tony.

“Besides, you talk too much.” And with that, the trickster moved in closer until his face was inches away from Tony’s.

“Do you want me to be yours, Tony Stark?” he breathed.

“Uhh… I… what?” Tony was completely stunned, not trusting his ears.

Before a coherent thought could form in Tony’s mind, Loki leant forward and kissed him deeply.

He broke the kiss and whispered against Tony’s parted, wet lips. “Think about it.”

Tony just stared back, wide eyed and astonished, unable to properly respond. With a wide grind on his face, Loki grabbed him by his neck and threw him out of the window.