Chapter Text
Tanjirou hasn’t made it very far through the exhibition when he has to stop because his head is too heavy and the ringing in his ears has returned.
It’s the first day of the exhibition and the galleries reserved for it are packed, but Tanjirou wanted to support Rengoku after so many days of working tirelessly to make it happen, and so he decided to brave the crowd even though he knew this would happen.
He finds an empty bench to sit and stares at a statue of Venus clad in what the sign describes as a golden bikini, fanning himself with the brochure handed out at the entrance. He takes in the delicate work done in marble and gold while other visitors walk around the gallery and converse in hushed tones, and presses a bottle of cold water to his flushed cheeks in hopes of alleviating the symptoms. His appointment with a doctor is coming up soon, and Tanjirou hopes that they can figure out the cause for his dizziness, whether it be anxiety or an issue like labyrinthitis.
Tanjirou looks down at the open brochure as he rests the cold bottle against his forehead and breathes in deep through his mouth. He’s only seen the introduction and half of the first chapter of the exhibition. There are three other sections that he has to walk through, but he can barely stand as it is.
The responsible thing to do is to turn around and walk out of the special galleries to return another day, but the entrance fee for temporary exhibitions is more expensive than the standard fee and he can’t afford to pay for it again just yet. There are books he needs to buy for his classes, and he needs to save money if he wants to make the trip back and visit his family this summer.
“Oh no,” he bemoans, shutting his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose. If he calls the café, Urokodaki-san would be willing to let either Aoi or Genya come find him, but they wouldn’t be able to accompany him through the rest of the exhibition. There’s bound to be a rush of customers once the visitors are done here, and Tanjirou doesn’t want to be the reason why they’ll be short staffed.
Someone clasps a hand on his shoulder, so sudden that Tanjirou nearly jumps out of his skin, covering his mouth with his hand when a wave of vertigo crashes over him. “Woah, easy.” The voice is familiar, low and soothing, and Tanjirou leans desperately in its direction. “Sick again, Kamado?”
Tanjirou shivers and nods weakly. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this again.” He can’t even imagine what Rengoku must think of him. “I wanted to show my support, but I’m not well enough to walk on my own.”
“You don’t have to apologize.” Rengoku’s hand moves down his shoulder to grasp his bicep, and Tanjirou gathers as much strength in his legs as he can to stand. Rengoku steadies him with both hands. “Come on, let’s go somewhere quieter.”
He keeps his eyes closed as they navigate the museum. Tanjirou can hear faint murmuring as they pass, but he can’t pick up on their words. “How did you find me?”
“Someone saw you were unwell and tried to find help. Luckily, they found me!” He squeezes Tanjirou’s arms and coaxes him to turn around a corner. It’s quieter here, less stuffy too. Soon they’re outside again, and Tanjirou recognizes the scent of the main building when they enter it a while later. A door closes behind them, and then he’s taken to a plush chair and instructed to sit. “Do you want some water?”
“I have some here.” He waves the bottle, still unopened and full.
“That water seems to have other uses,” Rengoku muses. Tanjirou can hear him pouring water somewhere to his left. “Here,” he presses the glass to his free hand, and his fingers close around it tightly.
Tanjirou takes small sips and tries to regulate his breathing. The smell of coffee is strong here, as well as something he’s learned to identify as Rengoku’s scent. It’s strong and warm and comforting, and wraps around him like a fleece blanket, easing the tension out of his shoulders and the cluster of confusing emotions inside him.
He opens his eyes some time later, when his stomach has stopped turning and his head no longer spins madly. They’re in a small office, with so many books stacked on nearly every flat surface or lined neatly on a bookshelf. There’s a divan, a tiny table to the side with a pitch of water and a coffee maker, and a framed photograph hung on the wall depicting a family of four. Tanjirou recognizes the woman from the first day, as well as Rengoku and two other men with a striking resemblance to him. His family, most likely.
Tanjirou stares at the table for a long while. If Rengoku has a coffee maker, why does he go to the coffee shop so much?
Rengoku is sitting on the other side of the desk, patiently waiting for Tanjirou to look at him. “Better?”
He turns back to him, coloring a little in embarrassment. “A little. Thank you, Rengoku-san.” He dips his head again, the glass clutched in both hands.
“I think we know one another well enough by now that you can call me by my name,” he points out. His eyes glimmer with humor, but his smile is earnest.
Tanjirou returns it in kind. “Only if you call me Tanjirou, then.”
Rengoku laughs, surprisingly low and rich. “Of course, my boy!” A shiver skitters down Tanjirou’s spine, and he drinks from the glass again in one large gulp. “We can stay here a while longer. I’ll show you around the exhibition once you’re feeling fine.”
“You don’t have to,” he protests. “It’s the first day of your exhibition. You should be out there.”
“It’s fine! Besides, I’d rather walk with you than have to make small talk with strangers!” Tanjirou is sure that the flush that rises up to his face has nothing to do with the dizziness that's been plaguing him. “So let’s talk for a bit, okay?”
Rengoku tells him about his life. His mother has always been a lover of the arts and used to teach calligraphy before she joined the museum staff, which drove him to pursue a career in art history. Eventually he got himself an internship in this museum, and then got promotions until he earned his spot as curator. His little brother is working towards his literature bachelor and still lives with their parents, while Rengoku- Kyoujurou moved out to his own apartment.
In turn, Tanjirou tells him about his life growing up in Asahi as the eldest son of six children. He tells him about helping at his parents’ bakery after school, and then fully balancing classes and work as his father’s health deteriorated. He had to postpone his entrance exams twice so he could help keep his family afloat while his father went through several procedures, and shares that he’s working to earn a masters in education to better support his family.
“It’s hard sometimes,” he says quietly, turning the glass around in his hands. “I keep wondering if I’m making the right decision, or if I should just go back so Nezuko can pursue her career in fashion design.”
He looks up at Kyoujurou, who’s been watching him intently all this time. “This is something you want, right? You spoke so fondly of your siblings, I can tell you like the idea of teaching children.”
“I do!” He quickly defends. “But I… I feel guilty for not being there. I’m the eldest son, I should be the one helping my parents.”
“You are helping them, even if it doesn’t seem like it right now.” Kyoujurou flashes him a reassuring smile, and Tanjirou nods, finding solace in his words. “Being accepted into the University of Tokyo without enrolling in a yobikou, though! That’s amazing and you did that all on your own! Why did you pick it?”
“Well, it’s one of the most prestigious universities in the country, so I figured I’d have better chances of it leading me to a well-paying job.” Tanjirou offers him an embarrassed smile and looks off to the side, thumbing the glass distractedly. “And… something called me here.”
There’s a beat of silence. Tanjirou looks back at Kyoujurou and flushes when he sees his raised eyebrows. “Something called you here?”
“Y-Yes! I know it sounds stupid-” Kyoujurou tries to interject, but Tanjirou keeps talking like freight train and doesn’t give him an opening “-but as I got older I just felt this- this pull to leave Asahi. Which is terrible, because I shouldn’t want to leave my family! And I don’t like that I did! But as I looked at university options and considered which to apply for, coming to Tokyo became more and more appealing to me and I don’t know why.”
He bites his lip, glancing down at his lap as the blush spreads down to his neck. Kyoujurou keeps quiet as he digests the vomit of words that Tanjirou just spewed. Tanjirou refuses to look at him. He knows that doesn’t make sense; Takeo said so when he caught Tanjirou musing aloud about it, while Nezuko and his parents just encouraged him to pursue that if it was what felt right.
It feels right, and at the same time it doesn’t. He doesn’t want to be away from them and while being here is making him physically sick, something tells him to remain right where he is.
Kyoujurou moves in his chair, shifting his weight down lower on the cushioned seat and resting his chin on his hand. He looks very comfortable there, and looking at his sharp features and at him now in his nice suit makes Tanjirou’s heart flutter. Oh.
“It’s not stupid,” he repeats slowly, as though to drill the words into Tanjirou's head. "Perhaps there is a reason why you should have come here. You'll know when you find it."
Tanjirou nods slowly. He's heard of it, of fate and things that will happen if they’re meant to. He's not really sure if he believes it personally, as all their lives his family had to work hard to get what they needed, but it's a nice concept. To feel that calling deep in your soul and go out in search of it. It sounds magical.
What could fate try to be nudging him towards, though? Is it a job opportunity that will allow him to better support his family? A way to get better treatment for his father so then he won’t have to spend so many days bedridden anymore? Someone with an answer to his problems?
“I hope so,” he says at last and finally puts down the glass on Kyoujurou’s work desk. Kyoujurou takes it as a sign that Tanjirou is feeling well enough to walk and suggests looking around the exhibition.
Enough time has passed by now that most of the visitors have left and the galleries no longer feel suffocating. Tanjirou barely felt the passage of time, and at the same time he’s glad for it as it gave him the opportunity to get to know Kyoujurou a little better.
They walk around at a leisure pace. Kyoujurou adds further commentary to the information provided by the brochures and the signs next to each artifact on display, walking close enough to him that the warmth of his body reaches Tanjirou through the layers they wear.
He still feels it as he walks home an hour later.
The trees in Ueno Park have long since lost their flowers. Verdant leaves have taken their place and they rustle gently in the breeze as Tanjirou, Inosuke and Zenitsu sit outside after their shift to enjoy a cold brew that Urokodaki-san gifted them before their departure. It’s just as hot in Tokyo as it is in Asahi, and with the temperatures going up as summer approaches, the treat is welcomed; needed, even.
Inosuke sprawls down on the grass under the shade of a large tree as Zenitsu idly scrolls through his phone. Tanjirou settles for people watching and drinks slowly from his cup as he watches visitors and tourists alike come and go.
“Man, these guys are so cool,” Zenitsu says and reaches over to Tanjirou to show him his Instagram feed. “What if I dyed my hair like them?”
Tanjirou looks at the picture in question, at a man with blonde highlights and another with his hair dyed a dark purple. They don’t seem to be anyone he recognizes, though their clothes hint that they’re possibly part of a band. He blinks at it, then frowns at Zenitsu. “Didn’t you dye your hair blonde once?”
“No? I’d remember if I did.” He raises an eyebrow, looking mildly worried for Tanjirou’s sanity. But… He’s pretty sure he’s seen that before… At some point… Or at least he thinks he did? Zenitsu has always been blonde in his mind when Tanjirou thought of him.
Zenitsu shrugs it off and goes back to scrolling through his feed. “You think I’d look good, though? I bet the girls would find it pretty hot.”
Tanjirou turns back to facing the paved paths of the gardens, doing his best to organize his confused thoughts. “I think it’d suit you.”
Humming, Zenitsu sets aside his phone and drinks from the straw. “I’ll look into it, then. Can you help me with it? I doubt the old man will even think that's a good idea.”
“I’m not sure I’m the right person to ask for help for bleaching your hair, but sure, I can try.” Tanjirou distractedly picks at a few blades of grass. “Nezuko might know something about it.”
“Oh, Nezuko-chan! How is she? Have you spoken to her recently?”
Tanjirou will never not be amazed at how Zenitsu seems so enamored by someone he’s never met before. He’s never even spoken to her through the phone, since Tanjirou usually calls her at night when he’s at home, but already he seems to have a crush on her the size of the moon, solely based on descriptions and retellings that Tanjirou provided.
He tunes Zenitsu out as he spots a familiar face walking briskly towards the museum. Kyoujurou must be returning from the lecture that he was invited to host at the University of Tokyo, carrying a briefcase in one hand and his suit jacket over his shoulder. Despite the concentrated look he has on his face, he still manages to spot them from the corner of his eyes and turns with a smile, waving awkwardly with the hand holding the jacket as he continues on his way.
Tanjirou waves back, a little more excitedly than is warranted, and watches Kyoujurou until he disappears past the gates of the museum.
“Dude,” Zenitsu drawls, catching his attention once more. Slightly embarrassed that he ignored his friend, Tanjirou offers him an apologetic smile. “You got it bad.”
He blinks, the smile slipping off his face. “Got what?”
“Don’t play dumb.” Zenitsu shoves him lightly on the arm, but Tanjirou continues to stare at him in confusion. “Oh, you’re serious! You really don’t know!”
“What are you talking about?”
“Tanjirou.” Zenitsu puts his hand on his shoulder and stares him in the eye, reminiscent of a father who is about to tell his son something serious and concerning. “You’re into Rengoku-san. Like, really into him.”
Tanjirou feels his mouth go dry. “What?”
“Your crush is so obvious I’m sure the people across the garden could see it. I’m surprised you didn’t realize, actually! You’re a pretty smart guy.”
“Thanks?” He says it out of habit, still too caught up on the fact that he might have a crush to really process the words.
Zenitsu nods sagely. “You’re welcome. Anyway, yeah buddy, you got a crush on Rengoku-san. A big one.”
“How?” He asks weakly, to which Zenitsu snorts.
“You tell me. He’s not my type, so I can’t answer that for you.” Zenitsu must see something on his face, because he squeezes his shoulder comfortingly and softens his expression. “Hey, it’s fine! There’s no shame in having a crush on an older guy! I mean, he’s pretty friendly and he seems to care for you, so it’s only natural!”
Tanjirou is still spinning. That familiar sense of vertigo sweeps in and he sways unsteadily until Zenitsu guides him to lie down on the grass. Inosuke is snoring lightly to his left, catching up on some much needed sleep. Tanjirou wants to do the same, and he also wants the grass to swallow him up and pull him underground.
He grasps Zenitsu’s yellow shirt tightly and looks up at him, unable to discern which of the three figures swimming in his sight is the real one. “What do I do?”
Zenitsu offers him an exasperated smile. “You keep it to yourself, or you tell him.”
Tell him. Tanjirou considers that option, but as his head begins to hurt, he decides to think about it at a later time.
There’s a person amidst the flames.
A silhouette, really. Their clothes and hair flutter in the wind, but they’re too far away for Tanjirou to see the smallest of details. From this distance, they’re nothing more than a dark, undefined shape.
He can feel his throat vibrating as he calls out for them, but he can’t hear his own voice, nor does he know what he just said. He tries to get his legs to move; it doesn’t work at first, but after a couple of nights that go on like this, Tanjirou finally manages to take the first step.
And yet, no matter how hard he tries to close the distance between them, the figure continues way out of his reach. They don’t respond to his calls, and the growing desperation in him expands until the dream fades and he's forcibly brought back to consciousness.
Tanjirou wakes up crying one night, tears steadily streaming down his face and his throat raw from calling a name he doesn’t remember. He buries his face in his pillow so it can soak up his tears and blindly reaches for his phone on the bedside table, fumbling with it one-handed and pressing it against his ear after hitting the screen repeatedly until the call connects.
He expects to hear Nezuko’s sleepy voice, but the tone that greets him is nothing like that of his little sister's. In hindsight, he should've known this could happen and he has no one to blame but himself.
“Yes?” Kyoujurou’s voice is rough from sleep and lack of use. Tanjirou sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth and desperately tries to hang up as his heart speeds up for a different reason. “Kamado? What’s wrong?”
He ends up dropping the phone twice, but even that is not enough to get his shaking fingers to touch the right parts of the screen and end the call. A shiver wracks through his body, his ear still tingling from having Kyoujurou's voice so close in such a vulnerable state. He won't be able to forget that now; it's a sound that will follow him to the end of his days.
“Tanjirou?” Kyoujurou sounds urgent now. Tanjirou tries not to think of him in bed, hair unruly and face sleep-soft, and picks the phone up again.
“I’m sorry,” is the first thing out of his mouth. He feels pathetic in ways he can’t describe. His only saving grace is that summer recess is fast approaching and he’s hopeful that going back to Asahi will give him a respite from all of this. “I didn’t mean to wake you up. I was trying to call my sister.”
“Please, you don’t have to apologize.” Kyoujurou breathes out in relief. “You don’t sound well. What happened? Do you need anything?”
Tanjirou turns in bed to lie on his back and drags a hand down his face. He shouldn't keep Kyoujurou awake any longer, but once again Tanjirou just… Can't keep his mouth shut once he’s talking to him. “Just another dream,” he murmurs.
Kyoujurou hums. “Do you get them every night?”
“No, but I get them often enough.” He’s so, so tired. And on top of it all, he’s still feeling lightheaded and sick despite the treatment the doctor prescribed him. “I can’t make sense of them and I have the feeling they won’t stop until I do.”
Fabric rustles quietly in the background as he moves about. Tanjirou idly wonders what he’s doing, what he’s wearing, and flushes. “You mentioned flames before,” he comments, surprising Tanjirou that he even remembers that. “Has anything changed since then?”
“I see someone now,” he says and Kyoujurou makes a quiet noise of inquiry. “They are too far for me to see better, but there is someone there.”
“Strange,” Kyoujurou says after a while. “It seems to me that you will uncover the truth piece by piece.”
“Yeah.” His cheeks feel weird where the tears have dried. Tanjirou rubs away the tracks they left on his skin. “I wish it wouldn’t cost me my sleep, though.”
Kyoujurou huffs a quiet laugh. “So do I.” There’s a beat of silence where Tanjirou focuses on the sound of his breathing and tries to time his own with it. The sound is soothing, but his scent right now would do wonders... “Do you want me to stay on the phone with you for a while longer?”
Tanjirou swallows and licks his dry lips. He won’t even try to pretend like he doesn’t want that. “If you wouldn’t mind.”
“I offered, didn’t I?” He says lightly, and Tanjirou can’t help but smile. “How about we make some tea to drink while we talk?”
“That would be nice,” he says softly and picks himself up from the bed. His heart aches as they talk, but it’s a good ache, different from the kind of constricting pressure that often grips his chest.
Zenitsu was spot on with his observation, he finds. Tanjirou likes Kyoujurou, and he likes him a lot.
"Damnit!" Inosuke slams his hands on the counter, rattling the cups and plates piled there. Tanjirou winces both in sympathy and at the noise, thankful that the coffee shop is empty and there are no customers to witness the outburst.
The webpage on his phone shows the final scores for this semester's exams. Inosuke didn't do spectacularly in most of his classes, but still managed to pass most of them. The worrying factor is that he failed one of his classes.
"It's okay, Inosuke," he tries to console him with slow hand gestures as though speaking to a wild animal. "I'm sure your professor will give you extra credits if you ask for a chance."
Zenitsu isn't as understanding. "If you studied as often as you pick fights with other people, this wouldn't have happened."
"What did you say?"
Tanjirou sighs to himself as they get in each other's faces. He is well used to their bickering by now, but still he has vague recollections of them arguing over several different matters that don't really make sense, though he can't recall when or if they ever happened. In any case, it gets a bit tiring to deal with it on a daily basis.
"They're a lively bunch," an amused voice comments from beside him. Startling, Tanjirou straightens up and faces Kyoujurou, who at some point entered the café while his friends were hissing at each other. "Good afternoon, Tanjirou!"
"Kyoujurou-san! Good afternoon!" He hurries behind the cash register. "What can I get for you?"
"A mocha today, please!" After handing over the money, Kyoujurou moves further down along the counter to wait for his drink. "What got them so angry like this?"
"Final grades are up," he says while measuring the coffee beans. "Inosuke failed one of his classes and Zenitsu insulted him."
"Ah, I see! A blow to the ego hurts more than a negative score!" He laughs and Tanjirou smiles to himself. That is true for both his friends. "What about your grades, though?"
"I passed all my classes! I tried so hard to get here, I might as well continue to work hard to get good grades!" He pours the drink into a styrofoam cup and seals it with a lid, setting it in front of Kyoujurou on the counter.
"You're doing great!" Smiling, Kyoujurou leans his folded arms on the counter and ignores his order completely. "Summer recess is just next week. Do you have any plans?"
Tanjirou meets his curious eyes and catches a hint of expectation in the air, a very subtle scent underneath the usual smell of coffee that lingers around him. His own heart flutters slightly in response, hopeful as to what it could mean. "I'm going back to my parents for a couple of weeks."
"Mm! I see! I hope you'll enjoy your time there, and hopefully you will feel better when you're back with your family!" His smile softens, loses its sharp brilliant edge and becomes mellow and sweet. Quieter, he says, "I'm going to miss you, Tanjirou. I'll count down the days for your return."
His lips wobble slightly as Tanjirou smiles, that bud of hope in his chest unfurling and blooming into something beautiful. "Thank you, Kyoujurou-san! I- I'm going to miss you, too!"
Kyoujurou doesn't stay for much longer and leaves after a quick parting, returning to the museum in long strides. Now that he's gone, Tanjirou turns to face Inosuke and Zenitsu, both of whom have gone quiet at some point in favor of watching the exchange. Inosuke looks like he just witnessed something particularly annoying, though.
"I think," Zenitsu begins slowly, "that he is very much into you, too."
Tanjirou's stomach flips pleasantly, his heart skipping several beats. A wide smile stretches his lips wide enough that it hurts. "You think so, too?"
"Yeah! You don't look at someone like that and say you're going to miss them if you don’t have feelings for them! He's definitely into you!"
Tanjirou looks down at his hands, unable to contain his happiness. Kyoujurou has never outwardly shown any interest in him that went further than that of being friends before, and though Tanjirou has kept an eye open for all the possible signs of his feelings being reciprocated, this is the one gesture that serves as proof that Kyoujurou likes him too.
"So what're you gonna do?" Inosuke crosses his arms over his chest, huffing. Once again, his uniform shirt is buttoned unevenly. Tanjirou is just glad it's buttoned at all. "It's about time you get your shit together and do something about this!"
"You're one to talk! You and Aoi have been dancing around each other for much longer than Tanjirou and Rengoku-san," Zenitsu points out, and Inosuke predictably bristles.
"I don't see you being anywhere near as successful with your crushes than us, dumbass!"
"Oh, shut up!"
As they resume their argument, Tanjirou turns around and hides his blushing face in his hands. It's embarrassing that even Inosuke called him out on it, but it can't be helped. It has dragged on for too long.
He ought to do something about this soon, and luckily he knows just the right person to talk to. And then, once he's returned from visiting his family, he can make his move.
It's a little more than three hours by train to reach Asahi from Tokyo. Tanjirou uses the opportunity to try to nap and catch up on some very much needed sleep after another restless night, but isn't very successful.
He settles for watching the scenery and focuses on the fact that he'll soon be with his family rather than on the tiny voice in the back of his mind trying to convince him to stop at the next station and head back. The farther away he gets from Tokyo, the more miserable he feels, which only adds to the growing guilt inside him. Tanjirou turns up the volume of the playlist he's listening to like it can drown out the messy lump of emotions in him.
At the station, Nezuko and Shigeru wait for him near the family's beat up car in the parking lot. Tanjirou isn't ashamed of the way he runs up to them and envelopes them in a tight hug, consoled by the fact that they hold him just as securely. He feels like crying, in relief or in distress he doesn't know, and either way he keeps the tears to himself for now.
The bakery is closed for the day so their family can celebrate his return. His mother hugs him tightly and kisses his cheek, teary eyed and so happy to see him again. His father still looks too gaunt and relies on a wheelchair to move inside their home, but he hasn't let his condition get to him and continues to smile every day. Takeo, Hanako and Rokuta circle him and demand his attention, and Tanjirou can’t hold the tears back anymore.
"Oh Tanjirou." His mother sweeps him up in a hug, and he clings to her like he's a child all over again.
Tanjirou slips right back into his old routine: wake up early, help at the bakery, help his father, take turns with his siblings to cook lunch and dinner, tidy up the bakery, spend the night with his siblings in the living room, rinse and repeat.
Contrary to what he'd hoped, being around his family doesn't make his weird symptoms any better. He scratches out the possibility that it could be some severe case of homesickness and is left to put his hopes on the new medicine his doctor prescribed.
Urokodaki-san calls him a few days in. Actually calls, as he seems to dislike the concept of texting, and asks Tanjirou about his family, which leads them to talk for nearly half an hour before he hangs up to feed his cats. While he still feels bad for taking off from Tokyo for a few weeks, Tanjirou is immensely thankful that his boss was so understanding as to let him stay with his family for that long. Urokodaki-san wouldn't express it so openly, but he showed his concern for Tanjirou's health in small ways.
Inosuke and Zenitsu are still in Tokyo and each has their own plans for summer recess. They talk every day, though Tanjirou is sometimes too busy helping at the bakery to reply right away, and agree to go out for dinner once he’s back in the city.
Kyoujurou texts him as often as his schedule allows. Usually, he’s too occupied to exchange more than a few words throughout the day, but he still finds the time to tell Tanjirou a little bit of his tasks, often at night. He even calls sometimes to check in if he’s been sleeping well, and Tanjirou is always honest despite his own desire to not worry Kyoujurou. He’s incapable of keeping things from him, it seems.
It's only when Kyoujurou's voice is so close to his ear that Tanjirou feels like the ever-present fog in his head lifts a bit too, and it does little to halt his growing feelings for him.
His family takes notice. He's always been a terrible liar and it's impossible to keep the joy out of his face when he checks his phone and sees Kyoujurou reaching out to him. His siblings ask, but are easily deflected or distracted. His parents give him curious looks, but wait for him to tell them on his own. Nezuko's eyes gleam with a knowing light whenever she catches him smiling at his phone, but she doesn't press and he doesn't say anything.
And then he invites her to take a walk with him. The beach is crowded at this time of the year, or as crowded as Asahi can be, which isn’t much compared to how Tokyo can get on a daily basis. They walk along the shoreline with water crashing over their feet, recalling the times when they'd come here when younger and talking about his new life in the big city.
Kie packed them some sandwiches and snacks for lunch, so Tanjirou spreads a beach towel on a vacant corner and they sit to enjoy their meal. Nezuko smells content, the apple blossom scent of her shampoo masking the undertone of an anticipatory feeling that lingers around her.
He exhales long and slow. It's the perfect time to tell her. It's why he asked her to come here in the first place. "I met someone in Tokyo."
Nezuko makes a noise of surprise, her eyes wide and she quickly chews on the bite of a chicken sandwich before swallowing. "Brother! That's wonderful! Who are they?"
Tanjirou looks down at his lap as a faint blush covers his cheeks. Her excitement means so much to him. "A museum curator. He helped me one day when I wasn't feeling very well."
"You haven't been well in a long while," she notes, and he's not that surprised that she caught on to that. She shrugs slightly and puts down her half eaten food. "Mom and dad noticed too. Is that why you're taking those meds?"
He blinks at her, truly surprised that he was found out. "How'd you know? I thought I was being discreet."
"I wouldn't have known if I hadn't gone into your room last weekend to get the laundry that you forgot to put in the basket." Her disapproving stare has the same weight and effect as their mother's; he feels properly chastised. "What's going on?"
So Tanjirou tells her about the sleepless nights, the lightheadedness and the constant knot of anxiety in his chest. He tells her of how he met Kyoujurou in the museum when he'd felt compelled to go in, how he's helped him again and again when Tanjirou was feeling sick, how he feels better when he's with Kyoujurou or simply talking to him, and how he hadn't even realized he'd fallen for him until Zenitsu pointed it out.
She listens in silence, only occasionally asking questions that will help her understand this curious situation better, and lets him talk until he runs out of words. Tanjirou looks out at the sea and resists the urge to rub a hand over his sternum like the gesture can soothe the throbbing inside his ribcage.
"He likes you too! I say that's half the problem solved!" Nezuko bumps their shoulders together and he smiles as they watch the waves. "So, how are you going to tell him?"
"I'm not sure." He frowns a little and sighs. "I have no clue how to go about this. Should I get him flowers? Or maybe chocolate? I feel like he'd prefer chocolate. He likes food so much, Nezuko! I think he'd like to come to the bakery someday! Ah, maybe I can take him out somewhere for dinner? But I don't know any affordable places that are good for first dates…"
Nezuko laughs, the sound of it dancing around them in the quietness of the beach. His cheeks flood with heat, embarrassed at his own rambling.
"You can just be yourself," she says. "What you've done so far has worked, so you can't go wrong now if you keep it up."
"I didn't really do anything, except for almost fainting on him twice," he mumbles and she shakes her head.
"You say that as if you didn't go to the exhibitions on the first day just to support him." Nezuko rolls her eyes and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. He gives her a faux offended look, to which she sticks her tongue out. "I mean it, you're overthinking! Just clear your head and tell him about it as soon as you see him so you don't chicken out! You know, like you do when you headbutt someone. You do it first and think about it later!"
"That's not a good example!" He laughs, feeling lighter when she joins him. "But I guess it could work!"
"Of course it will! When am I ever wrong?" He can think of a few instances, but she has just as much dirt on him to strike back.
They sit in silence for a while. The waves crash gently at the shore, lapping up at the sand just a few feet away from their towel. Tanjirou really missed the peaceful quiet of his hometown, but something continues to pull him in the direction of Tokyo.
"I want to go back," he blurts out, but Nezuko doesn't seem surprised by the admission. She must have known he felt that all along, before he'd even realized. "I don't know why, but it hurts and when he's around I feel better! I like him so much, Nezuko. He means so much to me. He's so caring and funny and I just love being around him! I really wish he was here right now!"
Nezuko puts a hand over his, his fingers fisted around the beach towel in a white knuckled grip. His eyes burn with unshed tears and an ache radiates in his chest, pulsing in time with his own heartbeat.
"Then go," she says, squeezing his hand. "If you feel like you need to go back, then do it. Listen to what your heart is saying, do what you want. Be selfish for once, brother. You've earned the right."
Tanjirou blinks once and the tears spill down his face, offering him a little bit of relief from the building pressure. A part of him rebels against the idea - it's his family and he’s wanted to see them for so long! They're so important to him and it's not right to leave now that he's here - but a bigger, louder part urges him to comply. It begs him to go back to Tokyo and find Kyoujurou, and it's scary how much he wants to do what it says.
"Don't worry about us," Nezuko says, smiling softly. "Mom and dad will understand. At the end of the day, they just want us to be happy."
Kyoujurou said there could be a reason for Tanjirou's need to go to Tokyo, something that he should find. Tanjirou thinks he might have found it.