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Chapter Text

He had a son.

His vision blurred as the force rang with the truth in those words.

Was he really all that surprised? After the shock of finding Padme in a near-inescapable coma, he had simply accepted that Sidious had lied to him.

But he still assumed that his child had died.

He turned to face the closed system that kept Padme alive. He had moved her to Mustafar in a last-ditch effort to use the dark side to save her.

That's what he told himself now, anyway. A part of him was acutely aware of his own attachment to her. Sidious would kill her (and probably him) if he found out that he was still weakened by such emotions that the Sith strictly rejected.

The only thing keeping her alive was the life support system and his own efforts to use the force to try and improve her condition. He had been consistently unsuccessful at finally waking her for the last 10 years. But he simply refused to let her die. How could he?

But now there was a son in the picture. A son who was responsible for destroying the emperor's most recent obsession. The Death Star.

He was aware of the Princess’s feeble attempt at lying, which had gotten her own planet blown up by the hideous machine. The destruction of the Death Star was possibly equal parts a retaliation against that as well as an attempt at weakening the empire.

But in all honesty, it was not as if he had made any real attempt to interrogate her. He reminded him too much of Padme. While he would never say this out loud, she also reminded him a little too much of Skywalker as well. The same headstrong nature and stubbornness.

He had simply done the bare minimum to make it appear as if he had interrogated her and left the cell as quickly as possible.

His own cowardice alarmed him. A part of him scowled at this. But for the most part, he was too tired to care.

But Luke’s…existence was a new problem. Sidious would no doubt want to turn him and use Luke to get rid of him. He knew Sidious was growing bored of his current apprentice. And another Skywalker had shown up just on time.

Sidious never knew the full extent of recovery he had undergone when he got out of the wretched life support suit. Largely because he didn’t tell him. But mainly because the power he regained from completing the procedure was almost always used to help Padme.

His head spun slightly from the ever-growing list of problems he had to deal with.

But he had a sense that solving this particular problem would probably require more…decisive actions than he should probably be taking.

But the rage and hatred he had for Sidious for the last 10 years was now reaching dangerously high levels.

He is going to choke the life out of that bastard with his own two hands, force be damned, even if it is the last thing he does.

Chapter Text

The atmosphere at the alliance base was jubilant despite the recent shift to Hoth. People were cold but not miserable. The high of destroying the death star was still high.

Leia hoped that would be enough to keep them sane.

The high command was however anything but. For now, they were safe. But how long? The empire was looking for them. Which meant they were on a tight schedule.

Which brought her thoughts back to the current discussion.

“I don’t understand why we are just waiting around for them to come kill us!” a lieutenant nearly screamed across the ongoing argument. In their defence it was the only possible way to get your point across.

“Enough.” Senator Mothma’s voice rang out making the room go deadly silent. She let the silence hang in the air for a few seconds before speaking.

“One victory no matter how big does not show our strength. Our forces are scattered and weakened. We need time to gather supplies and troops. I assure you; we have waited 2 decades for our chance. We will advance when the opportunity is ripe.” Senator Mothma assured, ending the argument.

“We must not let our emotions rule our decisions. It is unwise.” Admiral Akbar added.

“Meeting adjourned” Senator Mothma said leaving the room. Leia followed.

“They have a point.” Leia said when they were out of the earshot of the troops.

“Yes and no matter how poignant that point is, it is not worth sacrificing everything we worked for until now.” Senator Mothma replied.

“I suppose. Any word from our unnamed sponsor?” Leia asked. This was a recent but interesting development. Someone had contacted the alliance with information and money. Lots of both. However, they were adamant about maintaining their anonymity. Which wasn’t unheard of she supposed.

“Nothing. Only the initial information that the Empire has started to send out probe droids.” Senator Mothma replied.

“Do you trust them?” Leia asked, dropping her pace and coming to a halt.

Senator Mothma turned to face her before replying

“For now, yes.” she said her tone indicating that this opinion could be subject to change.

Chapter Text

Luke really did not understand force ghosts. Or more importantly how to contact them. A strange man had appeared to him while he was patrolling and told him to not do anything rash.

An odd but valid request. But the strange ghost had given no indication of who he was.

Or more importantly how Luke was supposed to train now.

He could tell that the ghost was that of a Jedi. Which meant surely, he and Ben could contact more Jedi that way too.

But so far, he seemed to be entirely out of luck as Ben was suddenly very busy with work for the High Command. Just his luck.

“Hey, kid!” Luke heard Han yell from the hanger he was walking towards.

“What is it?” Luke yelled back confused. He was just about to get off duty and be off for a break. Surely, they were not going to cancel his break.

“Mothma wants to see you.” Han said as Luke entered the hanger grateful for the warmth inside the hanger no matter how limited.

“Why?” Luke asked, puzzled.

“I dunno kid. Just go before the princess starts yelling at you for being late.” Han said looking annoyed, usually a product of him and Leia bickering. Surely if he of all people could see what was going on between them, they could too right?

“Fine. Falcon alright?” Luke asked as he noticed Chewie taking apart the hyperdrive yet again.

“She’s alright. I wanna get out of here as soon as I get the money I am owed.” Han grumbled walking away.

Luke did not understand his friend sometimes. Regardless, he should probably go meet Senator Mothma.

Chapter Text

The second he walked into the office he knew something was off. Ben would say it was the force.

“Skywalker. Please, take a seat.” Senator Mothma said, gesturing to a seat opposite her desk.

“Good afternoon, Senator.” Luke said, taking it.

Senator Mothma stayed quiet for a few seconds before speaking.

“Is there…anyone you know who could have the money and resources to help the alliance remotely?” she asked in a serious tone.

“No. Not by any means.” Luke replied. Being well connected was most definitely not one of his qualities.

“Anyone in an important position who may have a particular interest in your well-being?” She asked again.

“Not really.” Luke replied.

“Very well. You may leave skywalker.” she said with an indescribable expression on her face.

Luke decided he would worry about this after lunch. He got up to leave and was almost out the door when the senator spoke again.

“Be careful skywalker. Don’t make decisions in a rush. And for now, you will be staying on base. All your duties stay the same but no more patrol. You are more valuable than you realise luke.” Senator Mothma said.

There was a note of sadness in the way she ended her statement. Not to mention the fact that she addressed him by his first name.

Luke could feel the force vibrating gently with the truth in the statement. Almost as if it was reassuring him.

“Understood ma’am.” Luke replied before leaving.

He really needed some lunch.

Chapter Text

A meeting with lord Vader usually one meant one of two things. Either a new order. Or an unfortunate termination. From life usually.

So, when Piett’s comm buzzed with direct orders from Vader to attend a meeting in his office. Piett debated if he should call his wife and kids to bid them goodbye.

He had gone expecting the worst

However, being asked to commit treason was not amongst the things he expected.

“Do you swear your loyalty to me above anything else? Including the empire?” Vader asked.

Did he?

This would mean the end of his career. This would mark the beginning of a long run from the law. At the end of which there was a higher chance of him dying rather than anything else.

“Yes.” Piett replied.

It wasn’t a lie. He held more respect for Vader than he did for the emperor or the empire. And now that he was being made to choose, he would rather make the right decision than the safe one.

Vader stared at him with his terrifying yellow eyes. Piett was reasonably sure his mind was being read.

“Very well. I hope you know what this means.” Vader replied.

“Yes. My lord.” Piett answered,

He knew. It terrified him. But he knew.

“I want you to stall the search for Luke Skywalker by whatever means necessary while still maintaining the image that we are actively looking for him.” Vader explained.

He had a million questions. But for now, he only wanted the answer to one.

“Are we defecting to the alliance my lord?” Piett asked. It was better to know.

Vader stayed silent for what felt like several minutes.

“I don’t know. Perhaps.” Vader replied.

Piett didn’t reply for a bit trying to accept the fact that Vader was showing any form of uncertainty. It was highly unusual. He wasn’t exactly sure if his lifespan would be increased or cut down due to Vader becoming more unsure about things.

“Very well my lord.” Piett said, saluting and turning to leave the office.

“I will answer your questions, Admiral. I simply do not have the answers you seek.” Vader said, making Piett stop.

“Understood my lord” Piett replied leaving to ensure that his previous order to search for Skywalker would run as inefficiently as possible.

Chapter Text

Vader wasn’t entirely sure what the plan was. Or if there was a plan at all. All he knew was that now that he had started, there was no going back.

That said, he needed the alliance to come through with their promise. He had contacted them in nothing but blind trust. Of course, they had no idea who he was. But the point was that they would be ready to move Padme.

He knew of course that they couldn't refuse. After all, why would they? Padme was one of the founders of the alliance. They would jump at any opportunity to get her back. Even if she was in a coma.

He knew that any…weakness he had needed to go before he actually started doing things. If Sidious found Padme she would become something he could take. Which gave him leverage that Vader really did not want Sidious to have.

The alliance on the other hand was reserved at best. Not that he could blame them. But it was annoying to have them feign ignorance all the time.
Surely they were aware that the ISB had most of the public figures who are most likely with the alliance on watch.

Regardless, they would be moving Padme today. To where exactly he didn’t know. But he knew Mothma wouldn’t harm her old friend.

Which meant he needed to make a trip to Mustafar. Now.

Chapter Text

It took some time to get to mustafar. Then another few hours to transport the life support system with Padme inside to the agreed location.

He never told them exactly how the delivery would take place. Only that the pod would be there at the assigned location.

It simplified the whole thing. He liked it when things were simple.

Soon enough, Padme was off. To where he didn’t exactly know. Skywalker may have hesitated in a moment like this but not him. Not anymore. He knew this would keep her safe. Safer than he would ever be able to make it for her.

That didn’t however stop him from putting a tracker in the pod.

Trusting the rebels with destroying the empire and trusting the rebels with Padme were two entirely different things.

However, there was something else he needed to take care of before he could rest a little.

Chapter Text

The destruction of the death star was a blessing no matter how he looked at it.

Except for one minor hiccup.

Motti managed to run. And the man was a problem for him now. He couldn’t have Tarkin's former lapdog following him around while he was committing treason. He had hated the man since the day he had met him. He really should have snapped his neck on the death star.

So, he decided to pay the man a quick visit.

He was currently sitting in Motti’s living quarters on coruscant waiting for the idiot to come back home.

He was well disguised. Not to mention not carrying his lightsaber. He couldn’t kill him with his lightsaber. It would be too obvious.

Besides, he has no objection to a blaster. As long as the man was gone, he really didn’t care how he did it.

It took another five minutes for Motti to finally walk through the door. To the idiot's credit, he at least noticed the fact that someone had broken into his house.

“Who are you!” Motti screamed in what can only be described as an undignified tone.

Motti struggled a little to pull out his blaster and opened his mouth to say something.

Unfortunately, he never got to find out what that was.

Motti’s dead body hit the floor seconds after he fired the shot.

Well. That was a job well done.

He left as quickly and discreetly as possible. As much as he knew no one would accuse him of killing Motti straight away, he didn’t have to make it easy for anyone.

By anyone of course he was talking about the emperor.

Vader only had a limited amount of time to steal intelligence and remove obstacles before Palpatine caught on to his apprentice's betrayal.

He would have to run sooner rather than later.

But before that happened, he had every intention of exploiting the resources he has accumulated over the last 20 years.

The force hummed in a strange way. He couldn’t figure out why the force was doing that. He had tried to meditate in order to seek answers only to have the force simply not let him. At first, he suspected his hold over the dark side was weakening.

However, after some time spent meditating, he was sure that was not the cause.

But something about the force seemed…happy. And that was an emotion he was not used to feeling. But the force still seemed to keep its distance. He resigned to simply wait and see what new twisted plan the force had for him.

Chapter Text

Slowing down the search for Skywalker was easy enough. It’s not like they had a big lead anyway.

However, ensuring that no one got suspicious was harder than he assumed. He could only feign to be incompetent so many times before people started to question his motives.

But Lord Vader solved that issue through means he was less than comfortable with. He got rid of Ozzel a week into being in command of the Executor. With a larger crew and far more power as an admiral, Piett had become more and more resourceful with his attempts at covering up any leads.

Although it seemed quite pointless. Lord Vader has already told him to deploy probe droids to every system except those on some kind of list. Many on that long list included systems Vader frequented, which can easily be explained away. The Hoth system and a few others, however, were not. He assumed that's where the rebels were hiding out.

Piett straightened involuntarily as he felt the cold dread that accompanied lord Vader wherever he went. Less than a minute later, the doors of the bridge opened, and the man walked in. Piett turned and offered a salute.

“Any updates, Admiral?” Vader asked.

“None, my Lord,” Piett replied. He was a little confused as to why Lord Vader kept asking this question. Brevity was one of the qualities his troops usually were thankful for. It meant they didn’t have to endure his presence for longer than needed.
‘
It had been around 3 months since Lord Vader’s first… treacherous? Order to him. And since then, people in important but invisible places have started to drop dead. All the people were ones the rebels would also want gone. Piett wasn’t stupid enough not to figure out the connection.

Although he was never told, they had escalated to open rebellion.

But that development wasn’t what was currently occupying the minds of everyone on the Executor. While Vader being more murderous than usual was not great, Piett estimated they had more time before the dark lord started killing his own troops due to…well.

His concerns regarding the lifespan of his troops and himself strangely had more to do with…Vader’s health. While he would never say it out loud, his superior has started slipping over the last few weeks. Erratic behaviours, hours spent locked up doing force knows what and forgetfulness. The last one is the concerning part for him.

Vader had always been anything but disorganised. The man was a maniac when it came to punctuality and attention to detail.

However, Piett had noticed a few subtle but unmistakable errors.

Largely because he was the one who had to cover them up to keep up appearances because if he noticed, the emperor absolutely would, too.

They were innocuous, really. Maybe he was missing a detail, he would usually have mentioned in a mission report or he was a few minutes late to a meeting.

Things that were very human mistakes to make. That wasn’t an adjective usually used to describe anything that did.

Every time Lord Vader walked onto the bridge, the first question without fail would be the same. It felt more like some kind of desperate attempt at reassuring himself more than a real desire for a progress report.

For now, until things got worse, Piett was content observing. Being the Dark Lord’s admiral, it was never clear what was and was not a part of his duties. But he doubted making enquiries about his superior sanity was one under any circumstances.

Chapter Text

Vader was dying.

Well, no, he knew what that felt like. This was different. He was practically being asked to be in 10 different places by the two sides he had somehow managed to get himself stuck to.

The destruction of the Death Star and Vader’s (perceived) failure to find Luke had finally sent Sidious into a murderous frenzy.

Nearly every meeting with his master ended in electrocution or being thrown against the closest wall. His prosthetics had to be replaced so often that he was considering keeping a set aside to just get electrocuted in. With his master now officially paranoid, he was having Vader fly from one end of the galaxy to another, securing dissidents and chasing the rebels.

Then there were the fucking rebels. Apparently, they had decided that his only reliable use was being an assassin after he revealed his identity to Mon Mothma. He wasn’t sure if all the alliance’s upper echelons knew of their newest benefactor’s identity, but he had revealed his identity to Mothma in case he needed to secure Luke and Padme in a hurry. There would be no time for the rebel’s democratic process then.

However, the senator had made it clear what their demand (or rather her demand, he suspected) was.

It was bold, really. He had expected some kind of barter in exchange for, if not keeping Padme alive with the rebel’s limited medical facilities, at least for keeping Luke out of any active missions.

He couldn’t risk an encounter with the boy right now. Not with Sidious on such high alert. Luke had to stay hidden if he didn’t want to get killed.

Or turn into something worse.

While he did not want his son to be indoctrinated by the Jedi, he would not leave his child to Sidious.

No.

Padme would never forgive him for that.

Or any of the rest of it. But he preferred not to dwell too much on that. He did what he had to. He would not die regretting it.

He couldn’t.

He was too afraid of what would happen if he suddenly stopped and started thinking too much about how meaningless his choices were after the discovery of both his wife and child alive.

Everything he believed in for 20 years was at risk of collapsing around him.

He couldn’t afford another crisis right now. Not when there was so much to be done.

Not until he got Sidious’s head on a plate. He can worry about it all if he made it through that ordeal alive.

Mothma had outright told him that if he wanted his wife and child protected, he had to become their newest hunting dog.

The rebels were revelling in their victory at leashing the emperor’s attack dog.

He had laughed. Actually, laughed for the first time in decades when the senator had made her offer.

He had expected many things. An immediate execution upon the emperor’s death was the one he was leaning towards.

But the Rebels had taken him by complete surprise when, instead, they had asked for his life.

Not his death.

His life. His entire remaining lifespan.

They wanted him to work as their own portable killing machine until it got him killed.

The sheer ridiculousness, audacity and hypocrisy of the offer had rendered him momentarily speechless.

But really, he shouldn’t have been all that surprised. The senator had not survived for so long under the Republic and the Empire without understanding that morality wasn’t a very useful skill in a war like this.

He had also laughed at the sick joke his entire life was turning out to be. He had gone from being owned by Watto to being controlled by the Jedi to being chained to Sidious by false promises and now had signed away what was left of it to the Alliance.

But he didn’t care. By some miracle his family was alive right now. If he needed to pledge his alliance to the damned traitor Kenobi himself, he wasn’t sure he could refuse right now.

Skywalker and Vader had only ever really agreed on one thing. That was saving Padme and their child. While he wasn’t too sure if he was ever one without being the other, all that nonsense was completely useless now that he knew his family had lived.

He didn’t care if he was Vader, Skywalker or some new monster the alliance was going to create as long as they lived. They had to live.

Which was why he was now desperately also searching for anyway to wake Padme. Light, Dark, something new entirely it didn’t matter. He had to find a way. There had to be a way. Now that he was so close to actually achieving all that he wanted in life, he was not going to take no for an answer.

And he wasn’t looking for a way to bring someone back from the dead here. Just a way to heal someone. Restore a significant part of their life force. But this wasn’t like bringing people back from the dead.

No, he had failed at that multiple times before he found Padme in the coma on polis masa by nothing but bizarre coincidence. His own quest for healing his body had somehow led him to Padme. He had initially started on that quest with the hope that the increased power would open more doors for him to try and save her. And he had gotten his wish. He has gotten more than what he had even dared to hope for at that point.

So he now refused to give up. Suddenly, the lack of success that had plagued him over the last decade seemed to have disappeared. The fact that he had spent 10 years with no success at all was suddenly irrelevant. He knew he was single-minded. But this was reaching a fever pitch even Skywalker hadn’t achieved.

He wasn’t eating or sleeping. And when he did, it was usually a ration pack and a few hours of morphine-induced sleep. He had ignored his doctor’s prescription for pain medication for 10 years now. While he had gotten newer, better limbs and looked more or less human now, some of the damage, while manageable, was declared “painful.”

Breathing hurt, his limbs hurt as the prosthetics grated against his sore bones and blistered skin. But the pain is still what fuelled him during his waking hours. After the pain on Mustafar, what he felt now was like a dream.

But he had noticed his own human limitation. He might not want to or care about eating or sleeping but with his attention being demanded by three different tasks, all of which were physically and mentally taxing, he had finally caved. It was the only way his mind would stop long enough for his exhaustion to take him.

While he hated to admit it. He liked those few hours. Few hours of complete relaxation and euphoria. He knew what awaited him when he woke up. The pain. The desperation. The fear. But for a few hours, he could just be. No cursed dreams. Just complete oblivion.

He would take what he could get. It's all he deserved. He wasn’t delusional enough to think otherwise now. All the anger and rage that fueled his belief in his choice of turning to the dark side was now truly dead and gone. Now, only the need for revenge and the desperation to keep his family safe was driving him.

He hoped he had enough strength physically left in him to live long enough to achieve those two goals.

His selfish and naive dream of ruling the galaxy, of changing it, of fixing it, was truly and entirely dead. He was tired.

Chapter Text

When they initially got a new benefactor, Leia was relieved. Relieved. After the death of her father and mother, a new, high-ranking and rich benefactor was something the rebel alliance needed.

When Mothma finally decided to hold a closed High Command meeting regarding the identity of the person, Leia bitterly regretted ever feeling anything but hatred.

By that point, they had employed him for around 3 months.

And they had reaped the benefits.

Key imperial officers dropped dead just when they needed. Money and information became available when they needed it. Worst red flag of all the ability to know just where the imperial fleet was and an unimaginably sure guarantee that the prob droids that the empire was sent out would never find them.

Really, the last two should have been what ticked her off.

It told her that whoever this was had been one of their prominent enemies.

What it didn’t prepare her for was the information that the man in question was Darth Vader.

The High Command was silent for a long time after Mon Mothma revealed the secret and laid out proof of Vader’s work over the last few months.

Leia was livid. How and why Mon thought this was an intelligent or rather a moral choice was beyond her.

She didn’t understand it. Any of it. Neither Mon nor, even more bizarrely, Vader.

“General, this is…beyond what your position allows you to decide.” Leia spoke up when everyone else seemed to have lost their damned tongue.

“Princess Organa, this is an unprecedented opportunity. Not only for us now but for our future too.” Mothma replied, her face as impassive as always.

What could possibly be the benefit of allying with Vader? Right now, sure. Logically, she understood that. As angry as it made her, it made sense.

But what future?

“Vader has to be tried and locked away for the rest of his life the second we can get our hands on him. If he dies in the process, even better.” Leia spat out, no longer being able to keep her composure.

“Yes, but what use is a dead man?” she heard another voice at the table.

Now this. This was positively ridiculous.

“General Kenobi, you cannot be serious.” Leia spluttered in an uncharacteristically undignified manner. How could this man whose entire life was obliterated by Vader personally say anything like that?

She watched as her father’s friend leaned back in his chair and fixed her with eyes that contained more sorrow than she imagined possible for one man.

“Vader will be a useful tool, considering the circumstances. And his history is more complex than you know, Leia.” General Kenobi said gently, almost quietly.

This time, it was Dadoona who spoke before she could.

“What circumstances?” Dadoona asked, his voice too curious for her own liking.

General Kenobi looked at Mothma, whose lips simply thinned in response.

Sighing, he leaned forward with what looked like tremendous effort. As if the mere knowledge of what he was about to divulge was too much to bear.

“Vader is Luke’s father.” General Kenobi said.

If Leia could throw up, she would.

Oh, Luke. She knew this would crush him. Whatever she thought Kenobi was going to say this…this wasn’t it.

She was brought out of her own mist of horror by more commotion from the room than she thought appropriate for that revelation.

Her own horror made sense. Luke was her friend. She cared greatly about him. But while the high command certainly cared for Luke, Leia was confused by the amount of shock this news seemed to have created.

“You mean to say…Vader is..” Madine’s voice just trailed off.

“There is no way. He was- He was a war hero! He fought for the Republic.” Reeikan said, sounding incredulous.

But it was Admiral Ackbar’s response that finally floored Leia.

“I am so sorry, General Kenobi.” Ackbar said his hand on Kenobi’s shoulder.

General Kenobi just nodded grimly.

“Wait, hold on, what do you mean?” Leia asked before some other jaw-dropping piece of information was shared.

The room suddenly seemed to grow dimmer.

“Leia, you understand why Luke is so revered among the troops, right?” Dadoona asked in that gentle tone that had become a constant since Alderaan’s…Her home’s annihilation.

“Of course. He destroyed the Death Star. I will always be grateful to him for seeking vengeance in my steed for the destruction of my home. My world” Leia responded, her voice now more controlled. She was not going to be the young, naive damsel in distress.

“Yes. You are correct Leia. But some of the awe also comes from his last name. A name he got from his father Anakin Skywalker.” Dadoona elaborated.

Leia nodded. Yes. She knew this. She knew Luke practically worshipped the memory of his father. This was why she knew this revelation would hurt him. But she could not understand why it seemed to also elicit such strong reactions from everyone else.

“Anakin Skywalker is- was a war hero, Princess Organa. The most recognisable face of the Clone Wars with the exception of General Kenobi here. He was almost a myth. Someone who inspired entire armies. Someone who effectively became the poster boy of the republic.” Mon Mothma explained, her voice now bleeding more emotion than usual. Clearly, there was some other kind of personal connection she was missing.

They all seemed to talk about this man with such awe and now sorrow that she simply could not compute the fact that apparently Vader used to be, is for intends and purposes, the same man.

The man from their stories sounded like Luke. It made sense. But Vader was everything this man and her friend wasnt

She didn’t understand it. It didn’t make sense.

But before she got a chance to voice her confusion, the force decided it needed to throw more curveballs at her.

This time, it came from Kenobi again.

“He was my brother. Almost a son even. I raised him, worked with him, loved him. But then he destroyed everything we knew. I was supposed to kill him. I should have killed him. I thought I did. But my cowardice is what left Vader alive to haunt the galaxy for as long as he has.” General Kenobi said, his voice heavy with regret. Although Leia had a feeling it wasn’t regret for not killing Vader when he had the chance alone.

“Okay. Fine. But how does this allow us to have a leash on Vader like Mon implied? You never answered General Dadoona’s question.” Leia asked deciding to drag the conversation back on topic. She understood more now. Atleast the context of why Mothma was even considering an alliance of any kind with Vader.

She couldn’t respect it. Not after the man had stood there and watched her world die. Sure, he might not have given the order, and his displeasure with the station’s existence was an open secret. But he could have intervened. He could have done any number of things. He could have just killed the fucking Emporer and saved billions of lives. He could have not made the choices he did.

“Yes. That.” General Kenobi said, now sounding more reserved.

Oh great. More news to upend everything she thought she knew.

“While General Kenobi has refused to elaborate on the circumstances of Skywalker’s betrayal, I can tell you what Vader has come to us for. We, of course, have his son. One he knows about now. He has demanded Luke be kept away from the Empire at all costs. In addition to that, however. We have…we have Padme Amidala.” Mon replied

“The former, I understand. Although why the monster has suddenly grown a moral compass is beyond me. But how does Senator Amidala affect Vader?” Leia asked now, the morbid curiosity she heard within Dadoona’s voice now plaguing her too.

This time, General Kenobi explained it again.

“Padme is his, was Anakin’s, wife. He was…convinced she would die in childbirth. He was convinced his nightmares of her death were premonitions. We all tried to tell him not to let that govern him. To not be so attached. But-” Kenobi was mid-explanation when Leia couldn’t stop her thoughts from spilling out.

“So she is Luke’s mother? She is here? And you are not telling him?!” Leia nearly shouted. They could not keep this, or any of it, from Luke. Yes, it would hurt him. But the lies would hurt him more in due time.

“He is safer if she doesn’t know. The force and the Jedi agree on this.” Kenobi replied with some of the fire she heard associated with him from her father’s old stories.

“Right, I presume this is the same wise entity that advised you all to tell a desperate and dangerous man to simply ignore his wife’s death no matter how deluded that belief was. Even more so, actually.” Leia scoffed. Seriously? What possessed the Jedi to think that this was the sane course of action?

But almost the second those words left her mouth, she knew she had said something dangerous.

General Kenobi stiffened in his seat. His eyes suddenly went cold.

“He was unhinged towards the end. His fears were entirely unfounded. However yes. We did not need to tell him any of that. Especially not after…” Kenobi whispered almost angrily.

But she knew he would not finish that though.

“That does not excuse any of his actions. It still does not explain why us having Senetor Amidala gives us control over Vader.” Leia asked again, forcing herself not to stray from the core of this discussion. No matter how convoluted Vader’s past, he was still dangerous. More dangerous, in fact.

“Vader seemed to have her. She is in coma as per out medical team. Stable but recovery seems unlikely if not difficult.” Mothma explained.

“Hold on, so Senetor Amidala was infact in danger?” Reeikan asked, confused.

“No! She was fine during her labour and delivery. Then for some reason she started slipping away. It took all our effort to save her. To keep her life force from fading away. We had secured her in Polis Massa. He condition was stable. We owed it to luke to keep her alive. But then 10 years ago she went missing. I suspected Vader. It was confirmed when suddenly he shed that suit. But some unfortunate fate, he was simply walked into her at Polis Massa.” General Kenobi said, his voice now stronger and surer than ever before. He sounded livid. The room seemed to buzz with his rage.

“And what? Vader just sent his wife who he is clearly obsessed with to his enemy?” Leia asked.
If she needed more confirmation of Vader’s insanity, this was it.

“Padme was one of my closest friends. She was a strong leader. A staunch believer in democracy. She was part of the delegation of 2000 and among the founders of what would grow to be the Rebellion. He knew we would not harm her. But as to why, I don’t know. Only he can answer what she has suddenly turned turncoat on the man he has faithfully served for 2 decades.” Mon explained.

Dumbstruck was probably not enough to describe how Leia felt right now. She had also heard stories of Padme Amidala from her father. All of them positive. How had this woman ended up with a monster like Vader? Had Vader duped her into it? But then again, this Anakin Skywalker sounded nothing like Vader. So perhaps the man she married wasn’t exactly Vader.

“Sidious had his sights set on Vader since he was a young jedi knight. But I suspect what sent him over the edge was the thread of Padme’s death. Perhaps the revelation that both the wife and son be believed dead weren’t in fact dead is what spurred this change.” General Kenobi said more to himself than anyone else.

He looked like he was far away. Almost like he was weighing the pros and cons of taking this risk.

Were there any pros?

But looking around the room she could see that for most of the alliance at least, the resources Vader provided were tempting. They were considering it.

“You are all considering this aren’t you?” Leia asked, unable to keep the note of defeat out of her voice.

“We are not thrilled at the prospect Leia.” General Dadoona replied reflecting the room’s general apprehension.

“But the information and resources he can provide us can be critical. There is no other imperial we can hope for a defection that is as high ranking as Vader. And the fact is, if we can get him fighting for us instead of against us, we could strike significant blows to the empire.” General Madine said nodding as he considered the situation.

“And after the Emporer’s death, Vader is likely to be the only one who can really tell us what was happening in the Empire. He can help is avoid a brutal Civil War. There are bound to be Imperial upstarts who want the throne. This also eliminated Vader as one of those candidates. Considering he is the only one with any kind legitimate claim to the throne, that is significant.” Admiral Ackbar added, although to his credit he sounded a lot less enthusiastic about this.

“When you say you cut a deal what exactly do you mean?” General Reeikan asked Mothma.
“Right. In exchange for his wife and son’s safety I asked him for his service, as I said. I made it clear that he would spent the rest of his live effectively under house arrest but we need his intel and unfortunately his…capabilities to bring an effective end to the Empire. A real trial seems unlikely. It’s probably not wise to needle him to that extend when he is willingly offering co-operation. He has agreed to serve the New Republic until his demise. Not a fair exchange, I know. But I believe it is one that will ultimately save lives.” Mon explained.

Leia hated it. Truly. But what she hated more was the she was right. The inevitable civil war post the Empire’s destruction would be bloody and long. Establishing another government after a dictatorship is not going to be easy. And having Vader around to get people to defect or to have imperial factions anhilated was a unique opportunity they could only ever dream of getting.

She knew she would lose when this was put to vote.

“What do we tell the troops?” Leia asked.

“The truth, princess. Perhaps not the whole truth. But the truth nonetheless.” Mon said sitting back in her seat. She looked tired.

“Are you hoping someone will kill him ?” Leia asked, unable to keep the laughter out of her tone entirely.

The Senetors eyes just glittered with an odd light full of slyness.

So, perhaps she could still get what she wanted.

Chapter Text

He was convinced the force had some grudge against him.

Force healing was a technique that was not new to him. Neither was it new to Skywalker then. The hitch was that he could never, then or now, effectively use the damned technique. Not to mention never achieve the amount of mastery needed to use it to bring someone back from the dead.

He wasn’t even sure it would work to that extent on someone whose midiclorian count was lower than a force-sensitive.

He had had some success with it in recent years. He had found ways to use his hatred and pain to try and heal himself and Padme and succeeded to some extent. But the results were short-lived. He could never sustain the healing he achieved.

He knew some dark side users occasionally called upon the light side to heal themselves.

However, for reasons that he knew were obvious but refused to admit, the light side simply would not yield to him long enough to actually heal and restore Padme’s life force entirely. It could heal her a great deal more now. He had made quite a lot of progress in the last few months. It seemed to burn his flesh and fried his prosthetics as he tried to channel it, but it worked. However, before he could properly employ his power to the extent needed to wake Padme, the force would shut him out.

Of course. First, he was told he needed the dark side to save Padme. Now that he had it, he needed the fucking light side.

Sidious hadn’t, however, been entirely untruthful about what Plagueis had achieved.

He just happened to conveniently omit the fact that his master hadn’t actually succeeded.

Vader seethed with rage at this. For what was probably the millionth time.

But his relentless hunt had led him to another potential candidate - Force Drain.

He did not know for a fact if it could be used to transfer his own life force to someone else. Sith techniques were not known for their selflessness.

But that was going to be the only other reliable option he had.

It was unlikely that the alliance would take kindly to him using one of their own’s life force to wake Padme. No matter how beloved she was by the members of the high command.

He was sure Padme herself could never live with knowing that fact that someone else's life was taken to save hers. He did not wish to do that to her. Not after everything he had already done.

That left him as the only viable candidate on the path of least resistance.

He didn’t know if he would survive it. He didn’t care.

The alliance could not find fault with him for dying. It would also not violate their deal. He would technically be serving them till the end of his life.

So, Vader had decided one of these must work. Using what he could of force healing and force drain together would be enough to save Padme. It had to be.

He didn’t have any other answers.

And he didn’t have time to perfect either of them.

He had unfortunately run out of luck.

He knew it was bound to happen sooner rather than later.

His master had issued a summons for him earlier today. He was to see him in person.

Vader wasn’t naive enough to think his master simply wanted an update on his hunt for the rebellion. He would not drag his hunting dog away for such a trivial matter.

No, this meeting was going to be his end. His master must really be confident in his own ability to both find and turn Luke. Vader could not disprove either.

So far, Piett had led them around the Galaxy on a wild bantha chase for the rebellion and his son. Sidious was practically frothing at the mouth just thinking about the idea of getting his claws on his son.

His master had long since gotten bored of Vader. He knew that. And now there was a new toy Sidious wanted. His son.

A putrid mixture of anger, resentfulness and fear rose up from within him. He was just another tool for Sidious. And Vader, in his infinite stupidity had believed Sidious at least cared about his interests. About what Sidious knew he valued above everything else.

He would not trust him again. He will not allow his son to become Palpatine’s latest toy.

He called forward the little mouse droid he had reprogrammed.

This was one skill he was glad Skywalker had developed. He had found a discarded Imperial mouse droid and taken it apart entirely and remade it to be loyal to him. It looked ordinary from the outside. But he was equipped with a highly encrypted comm system Vader used to contact the alliance and a data bank he has been strategically downloading information that would be of interest to the Alliance on to.

Admittedly, as the Commander of the Imperial Navy, he had access to a lot of it. But he couldn’t make it obvious. He had hidden the information he downloaded under the current missions he was on. He had covered his tracks to the best of his ability.

“Have you encrypted all the data I downloaded for you?” Vader asked MD-1 (he knew it wasn’t very creative. But he was running low on creativity at the moment.)

Emdee beeped an affirmative in binary. Even though it was binary, his chipper tone was still clear. The droid somehow sounded excited at the prospect of treason.

Why did every droid he ended up possessing turn out like this?

Sighing, he continues to relay his commands to the cheerful little droid.

“Very well. You need to go to my private hanger and get on to my shuttle. Sweep it for any trackers before punching in the coordinated for Bast. Land on the abandoned hanger to the north of my castle there and wait. I will be there as soon as I can.” He relayed, hoping that, unlike the last droid that accompanied him in another lifetime, this one would at least be discreet.

Emdee beeped another affirmative and did a little spin for good measure as if to reassure him of his capabilities.

It did not reassure him.

“Alright, off you go.” Vader said with a gesture towards the door.

Emdee seemed to be buzzing with excitement as he left Vader’s office.

He was most definitely not reassured.

That done, he summoned Admiral Piett to his office. For the work he had done for him, he at least owed it to the man to tell him his superior was off to commit treason.

He did not have to wait long before the man stood before him, nervousness rolling off him in tidal waves.

Maybe the Admiral wouldn’t survive this despite his warning. Sidious would be able to read him like an open book.

“Admiral. I have called you here today to inform you that your current orders will no longer be applicable in a few hours. You will have a new CO soon enough. I simply wanted to thank you for your efforts and warn your for the inevitable investigation of my personnel. I hope you find a way to live through it.” Vader explained, hoping he wasn’t being too unkind. The man had saved his son’s life. For that, Vader was indebted to him.

Piett seemed as if he seemed to be analysing if staying alive was even an option at this point.

Vader had started to wonder if the man had gone into shellshock or something before Piett answered.

“Do you intend to defect today, My lord?” The Admiral asked, his voice perfectly neutral.

“Yes,” Vader replied shortly.

Piett was quiet again for a few minutes.

“Do you think the Alliance would accept another defector?” Piett asked in the same deadpan tone.

Vader blinked. For what must have been a painful few minutes, Vader just stared at the Admiral.

Why did all his subordinates also end up like this?

His disbelief, however, quickly turned to apprehension.

It would be good if the Admiral defects, too. That way, he would not have to leave behind any trace of his treachery. He had already gotten rid of every copy of that list. The person who knew it stood in front of him now.

The force gave no warnings. Probing the man’s mind, he sensed nothing but nervousness, fear and, bizarrely, curiosity. The Admiral was earnestly asking him if he could defect to the Rebel Alliance.

However, Vader had had enough to judge Piett’s ability. He did not need to insult the man by questioning his resolve.

“Perhaps. It would be a risk, but considering the fact that they sought to take advantage of me rather than kill me, I would say your chances are above average.” Vader replied drily. Great. Another unexpected wrench in his plan.

The Admiral nodded as if the question was merely rhetorical.

“I just need a few minutes to secure my family, my lord. I…I would like to try for asylum with the alliance rather than leave them behind,” Piett replied, his face giving away the fact that he was already planning for all possible situations.

Considering why Vader was doing any of this, he could hardly object. He nodded his agreement.

Taking out the private encrypted comm he had designed for this exact nightmare; he contacted Emdee. He could still feel that his ship was onboard.

“I am sending Admiral Piett to you. He’s an ally. Don’t do anything stupid. Once you are in hyperspace, give him the coordinates to Bast.” Vader said into the comm, trying to sound as threatening as possible to a droid through a comm.

Why exactly was his life like this?

Emdee beeped happily as if he had just told him he was sending him a present. Clearly, his intimidation tactic had either failed or the droid was going to be a problem.

Either way, he doesn’t have an alternative right now.

Hanging up, he turned to Piett and told him to go to his private hangar. Vader asked the man to have his family meet him on Bast. They had to meet them on Bast. He was not going to send the alliance bases’s coordinates to random people.

Soon Piett, too, was out the door.

Once he felt the man’s presence leave the corridor that led to his office, Vader picked up his comm again, calling Emdee.

He immediately got an excited greeting in response.

“Scan Admiral Piett and any belongings he brings on board. Scan all other individuals he brings on board too. He is only authorised to allow his family on board at Bast.” Vader ordered. He knew Piett was competent and loyal. Trusting him, though, was a step too far.

Knowing he had no more reasons to delay his departure to the Imperial Center, he got up and secured his lightsaber to its hilt. He surveyed the room warily. He couldn’t say he would miss it. But there was comfort in familiarity. He had already stashed the few personal items he had, spare clothes (whatever his allegiance, he was not going to wear those horrendous orange jumpsuits the rebels wore. He was desperate, not blind.), and enough medication to be booked for drug trafficking as per Imperial Law.

He had grown to actually enjoy getting a few hours of uninterrupted and quiet sleep every other day or so. He didn’t want to risk the Rebels denying him his meds. Almost as if suddenly aware, he patted at the small bottle he had on his person.

He had forgone sleep yesterday and it was starting to make him jittery. He hadn’t anticipated not being able to sleep a few hours in the early morning. They were currently refuelling and were not due to leave until tomorrow.

Deciding it was time to face the consequences of his choices once again, he made his way to the main hanger, where a shuttle was waiting to take him to see the Emporer.

He had no other objective at the moment except to survive.

Chapter Text

The moment his shuttle landed inside the Palace’s hangar, he knew he would only escape from here by the skin of his teeth. Sidious’s rage seemed to have flooded the entire building. It was spreading anger wherever it went. Clearly, it was affecting the people staffing the place, too. Every guard he walked by emanated bloodlust. They wanted to kill. Sidious wanted to kill.

He was going to be the one up for slaughter today.

He stood outside the doors to the Emporer’s throne room. After ensuring his lightsaber was still where he last secured it, he summoned as much of the dark side as he could. He used all the anger, hatred, fear and pain he could feel and allowed it to flood his mind.

He could hear the dark side whispering false promises of victory. Telling him to seize the throne now. But he held those thoughts at bay. If he tried to fight Sidious now, he would lose. He would then be leaving his family to his master, and Padme stuck in a coma.

A coma he put her in, the dark side whispered maliciously.

He needed to get out alive for now,

He pushed the large doors open with the force, walked to the front of the throne and knelt. He knew the show of obedience was meaningless. His master certainly knew too.

Before he could finish that thought, he felt himself being flung backwards towards a wall. He hit it with a concerning crack and slid to the floor. He could feel warm blood trickling down his neck.

Well. Right to it, then.

Not wasting any more time, Vader sprung to his feet, activating his lightsaber.

His master was walking towards him. He did not need to see the man’s face to know the twisted snarl that would be on it.

“Of all the people who should think to betray me, you should have been the last, Lord Vader” Sidious spat, his anger and irritation lashing at Vader like whips.

His master had considered him too broken, too lost to grief and guilt, to be capable of treason. A part of him was glad to catch the old troll by surprise.

“But perhaps I should be glad you are acting like a true Sith instead of moping about thinking of your dead wife.” Sidious said, the glee in his voice clear as day.

His master loved reminding him of his greatest sin often. Even after finding Padme alive, the words ‘dead wife’ still made him flinch involuntarily.

“Perhaps you now seem to think the whore had somehow lived since she had clearly survived long enough to give birth to Skywalker’s offspring.” Sidious answered his own question

Vader saw red. How dare this slimy bastard insult Padme. In his blind rage, he lunged at the Emporer, momentarily forgetting his resolve to not attempt anything foolish before saving Padme.

Before his lightsaber made contact with his master, however, Sidious was gone.

Damn him and his ability to read Vader so clearly.

Whipping around, he set his sights again on his master, ready to slice him up into a million pieces and then feed the rotten corpse to a sarlac. Before he could do anything he felt invisible fingers wrapping around his throat.

He could feel his airway slowly being restricted like he had done to so many others. Like he had done to her.

“Perhaps you need a reminder of how you snuffed out her life.” Sidious drawled, striding forward, his hand extended out in a sick imitation of what he had done 20 years ago on Mustafar to the one person he vowed to protect.

His vision blurred from the lack of oxygen as he dropped to his knees. He struggled to keep his lightsaber in front of him as his already damaged lungs struggled to take in whatever limited amount of oxygen he could get.

His master’s attempt to torment him did however, break his anger’s hold on him long enough to remember why he was here in the first place.

“Do you see what she must have seen in her final moments with you, Lord Vader? Perhaps this would be enough to bring you back to reality.” Sidious asked, his voice low and laced with mirth.

He was walking towards Vader while goading him and he just needed his master to come just a little closer. Through his blurred vision, he could see his master’s outstretched hand coming closer and closer. The moment it was close enough, the force told him this was his chance.

Blindly, he swung his lightsaber upwards, and from the howl of pain and the smell of burnt flesh he was so familiar with, he knew his blade had found its target.

Likely more from the surprise of being attacked by someone he considered thoroughly broken than the pain, his master stumbled backwards, distracted and disoriented from suddenly losing an appendage.

Vader felt the invisible grip around his neck suddenly disappear. Deciding not to stick around long enough to find out how Sidious might respond to such an open show of disloyalty, Vader sprinted to and out the door within seconds before Sidious recovered from his disbelief.

The royal guards outside were clearly caught off guard by the second in command of the empire sprinting out of an audience with the emperor. He managed to almost get to the end of the corridor before he felt a thud in the back of his torso as if someone had thrown something at him.

Looking down, he saw the end of the guard’s spike sticking out through his stomach. Searching through the force, he found the two royal guards now steadily catching up with him and snapped both of their necks before they had the chance to do any more damage.

He could feel a strange cold flooding through him. But he had no time to figure things out. From its positioning he guessed it missed most vital organs. He had no way to check but figured pulling it out was a bad idea.

Using his lightsaber, he cut off the two ends that were outside his torso. He had the bizarre thought that he was essentially plugging a hole in his torso. He didn’t have time to laugh at the matter at the moment.

He was running through the maze-like hallways of the Imperial Palace as quickly as he could. Every time he moved, he could feel a sharp pain, but he decided to worry about all that later. He didn’t feel any weaker. His blood hadn’t soaked through his jacket yet, so he assumed he hadn’t lost enough blood in enough time for it to be a concern.

By the time he got to the hangar, the place was crawling with stormtroopers. He had anticipated as much, but he was not looking forward to this. Igniting his lightsaber, he started to cut down man after man. It wasn’t difficult. Being an indoor hanger, the range of their blasters were limited.

He deflected most of the shorts fired at him back at another trooper. It still took him what felt like a lifetime and a few blaster shots to reach his ship. Vader scrambled up the ramp and had to keep deflecting blaster shots and throw troopers against formations until the second the ramp closed.

Realising he probably had minutes to get out of the Imperial Center before his access codes got jammed, he piloted the ship out of the hangar and shot upwards towards the sky as fast as he could.

Using the override codes he had access to, he disabled both the planetary shields and went into Hyperspace before he even properly made it out of orbit.

He just stayed in the pilot’s seat, frozen with a mixture of excitement, pain and what was probably just adrenalin from the battle.

It felt good to cut off the troll’s hand. In retrospect he realised how damning it was for his master. Sidious favoured the use of Force lightning. Something he could not use due to his prosthetics.
He could not help the smile that crept up on his face.

Yes, whatever this decision would lead him to do, it could only be better than what he had spent the last 20 years doing.

Chapter Text

The trip to Bast would take at least four hours—plenty of time for the Emporer to give out orders to hunt him down.

He hoped abandoning his shuttle in favour of his own personal ship on Bast would be enough to get rid of anyone tailing him.

The alliance would not understand his situation if he showed up with the entire navy on their doorstep.

In the meantime, he set to work wrapping his torso up in bandages. He just had to hope stabilising the wound would buy him time and that the alliance would at least save him if he did not make it long enough to save Padme before passing out or dying. He used the limited amount of bacta he had and was content with his handiwork. At this point, both his shirt and jacket were bloody. But the bleeding did seem to be slowing down now that the wound was wrapped.

He really should have planned for getting impaled, too.

The rest of the time, he spent mindless searching for any trackers on the ship or himself. The scanners indicated nothing, but he needed something to do, so he went around searching mechanically anyway.

He had almost started a second sweep before the ship beeped to indicate he was going to be out of lightspeed soon.

Returning to his chair, he prepared to take manual control just as the ship appeared above the flooded, rainy hellscape called Bast. He adored this planet. It was difficult to get to and even more annoying to stay on.

It also had the opposite problem of Mustafar. You couldn’t light something on fire outside if you tried.

Being a planet devoid of imperial presence except his own castle, this was the safest place he could rendezvous with Emdee. Once he had made it through the relentless rain, he started towards the non-descript hangar at the northern side of his castle. He did not keep a large amount of troops here. So even if orders for his capture or execution have been given, there would be no real threat to him.

He spotted the ship tucked away in the small hanger, barely shielded from the rain. Setting down his shuttle, he quickly made his way over and was greeted by an ever-enthusiastic Emdee.

He was going to have to program fear or at least common sense into droid at some point.

“Everyone here?” he asked the droid, not bothering to verify the fact himself. They needed to leave now and he had no time to wait around.

Emdee answered with a cheerful yes.

“Excellent. Let’s leave.” he replied, punching in the coordinates for Hoth and charting a course off of here before the Empire came knocking.

Soon, he was back in hyperspace. It was calming to watch the stars blur together into lines after everything that had happened in the last twelve hours.

He didn’t get long to zone out before the force alerted him to four nervous presences outside the cockpit.

Right. The Admiral and his family. Ensuring he had pulled his hood back on, he made his way out towards them.

In the main hold, he saw Piett, a woman he assumed was his wife and two young kids. The oldest could not yet be older than 10.

“My Lord.” The Admiral offered his salute while the rest of them simply stared at him. At least the younger boy had the sense to hide behind his mother. The other boy looked like he was having the time of his life.

Apparently, he was the one who inherited his father’s idiotic sense of curiosity.

“Forgo the titles, Piett. I suspect I am neither a Lord nor your CO at the moment. “ Vader said, sick of the damned title. He was the lord of absolutely nothing. Even now he didn’t even own his own life.

“Er…What shall I address you as, sir?” Piett offered, catching onto the irritation in his tone.

If he had to be frank, the man’s ability to read a room is probably why he had lived so long under his command.

But what were they supposed to call him?

“Vader is fine.” he decided.

“Yes, My Lor- I mean Vader.” Piett replied, sounding out his name carefully as if saying it the wrong way could get him killed.

It might have at one point in time.

He reached out with the force to investigate all their force presence. He sensed only nervousness from the adults and nothing but general curiosity and fear from the children.

Although he did notice that the younger boy had more of a presence in the force than the others. He was likely force-sensitive. Just not powerful enough to wield it. So that’s why he had reacted to Vader’s presence.

“Are you alright…Vader?” The woman asked, staring at his blood-soaked uniform.

“It is of no concern. I can tend to it later. We should reach the Alliance base in 2 hours.” Vader replied, putting an end to the painful conversation. Both literally and metaphorically. His neck hurt, and his voice was still raspy from being force choked.

He didn’t wait for a response before disappearing into the cockpit again.

He needed silence. He needed to meditate and prepare himself for waking Padme. No doubt his injury would be a hurdle. But he didn’t particularly care about what happened after he woke her. He was more than happy to die today if it meant she would live.

So he settled back in his chair and retreated deep into his mind.

The two hours seemed to pass by much faster than the last four. Vader was woken from his meditation by the sound of their impending approach of Hoth.

Really, of all the places the rebels decided to hide in, they had to choose a dessert—a cold dessert to make matters worse.

As the icy snowball that was Hoth appeared in front of him, he wondered just how well this was going to go. He had no delusions of a companionable welcome. He hoped to get an open communication channel to Mon Mothma before being shot down though.

The location of the rebel base was not difficult to find. The only place teeming with life was easily visible in the force. Padme’s presence, although dulled by her condition, was still like a beacon in the force to him.

The rebels had been smart enough not to directly take Padme’s medical pod to Hoth. Instead, the tracker died on Yavin—their old and now unused base.

So that's where they were hiding out before.

Their current location was revealed to him by a reluctant but determined Mothma. He wasn’t sure if he should be glad of her correct assessment of his loyalty to his family or be concerned that he was now stuck working with people who would take a chance of that magnitude.

He had his own theories as to who was likely to provide such an accurate assessment of the situation. Something that could only be done through a connection to the force and years of training.

One he knew his son did not have.

So that left only two options in his mind—either Yoda or his old master.

Unfortunately for him, it was the latter, not the former. He could feel Kenobi’s presence now that he had entered Hoth’s atmosphere and was steadily getting closer to the base. He could feel the rage flare up within him. If he lived to see another day, he would rip the man to shreds.

Although with even more irritation he remembered that this would technically be an attack against the Alliance.

Wonderful. He had to tolerate the presence of that old fool till one of them died. Perhaps he could arrange for either one of those outcomes to happen on “accident”.

It did not take long for his ship to get hailed by the Rebels. The comm crackled to life and he heard the voice of one of the rebels over it.

“Whoever the kriff you are, you better have a good reason to be here or we are blasting you and that imperial ship of yours out of the sky.” a voice over the comm hissed in barely controlled rage.

Certainly not a warm welcome.

He also bristled at the way he was being addressed. This was something he had not experienced in 2 decades now. He wasn’t sure everyone would make it out alive before he adjusted to his new role.

Deciding to be safe rather than rash, he simply responded calmly over the comm.

“I am an Imperial defector. I have been working with the alliance for some time now. My cover has been blown, forcing me to run.” he responded. It was basically the truth.

“Right. A likely story.” the woman on the other end scoffed.

He could feel artillery being pointed at him and hear X-wings circling around but still maintaining their distance.

“Open a communication line to Mon Mothma. I assure you, while you certainly won’t regret shooting me down, destroying the ship will not be in your favour. I have more Imperial intelligence on board than you could ever dream of getting.” Vader couldn’t help but snarl back.

The line went dead for a bit, and he prepared to fight his way to the base if he had to. An irritating few minutes went by as he readied his ship’s armaments and strengthened its shields.

He was getting off this rock with his wife and son if the alliance decided to be foolish.

The comm came back on this time; however, the saner voice of Mon Mothma rang out.

“General Kenobi sensed some…great disturbance. I am guessing that's what led you here.” Mothma asked, her tone curious more than accusatory.

Vader couldn’t help but scoff. Of course, Kenobi could detect his master’s rage and fury at being betrayed by Vader.

“Yes. But I acquired all the data I could. Intelligence reports, schematics and more interestingly to you…plans.” Vader replied, hoping to entice them into letting him land at least.

“Very well. Move to Hanger 3. We will meet you there.” Mothma responded.

Before she could cut the line however, Vader interjected.

“I have my Admiral on board as well. He was acting to protect your interests during his time in my service. He has decided to defect along with his family. They are onboard as well.” Vader informed her not wanting to get shot at on arrival if he could avoid it.

“Understood.” Mothma replied. If the ex-senator was irritated or confused, her voice did not betray it.

With that, the line went dead.

He could feel the rebel troops standing down on the ground, and his radar showed that the pilots had disengaged.

Without delay, he made his way over to the Hangar. He saw it open slowly and glided the ship smoothly into a hanger, settling it into a corner.

Sweeping his way out of the cockpit, he was met with a concerned-looking Piett.

“I have informed them of your defection. Stay with the droid. Ensure the Rebels keep him safe for their sake.” Vader instructed.

Piett simply nodded in response.

“Emdee. Stay with him. Co-operate with our new…friends.” Vader replied to the droid that was now anxiously waiting for his new commands near his boots.

Seemingly content with his new orders, Emdee beeped in excitement before zipping over to keep the Piett children occupied.

Apparently, they were well acquainted now.

Pushing the button to lower the ramp, Vader adjusted his cloak again. He would never admit it out loud, but he felt oddly self-conscious. He was also extremely nervous. This was the closest he had actually ever come to saving Padme.

What if it didn’t work? What if he failed? Again.

No time to wallow in self-doubt right now.

He was met by what he assumed was the Alliance’s high command. He recognised only Mon Mothma and the Princess of Alderaan. He was a little surprised to see her be part of the rebel leadership, but after Alderaan’s unfortunate end, he supposed it was only natural.

“Lord Vader. We were not expecting such an unexpected…visit.” Mothma offered.

“Save the fake pleasantries, Senator. We all know they are meaningless.” Vader replied. He wasn't here to play pretend.

“I am not a senator anymore, Lord Vader.” Mothma responded, her eyes and tone colder.

“What shall I address you as?” Vader asked, curious himself.

“Chancellor will do.” Mothma, now chancellor, asserted, her tone stricter, more authoritarian in a way.

Huh. Perhaps the Alliance was more serious about this than he gave them credit for.

He nodded to indicate his acknowledgement.

“You may drop the title too, Chancellor. It was meaningless even during my service to the Empire. Simply Vader will suffice.” Vader also offered in kind.

“Very well, Vader. We have informed the members of the alliance of your defection. Unsurprisingly, the news was received with little enthusiasm. I suggest you…stay alert.” The Chancellor warned.

Surely, they understood how ridiculous the warning sounded. He was never the prey. Always the hunter.

Except for when it came to Sidious, a part of his subconscious whispered.

Clenching and unclenching his jaw to hopefully sound more sure of himself than he was feeling at the moment, he decided to bring up what he was really here to do.

“I will keep to my ship, Chancellor. Surely, your troops know better than to blow up their own ships in a futile attempt at assassinating me.” Vader scoffed.

From the expression on the high command members' faces, they did not look like they knew that for a fact.

Before some other meaningless formality got brought up, Vader ploughed forward with the conversation.

“First however, I need- I need to see Padme. I believe I can wake her.” He said his voice meeker than he wanted it.

Mothma looked at him for a second as if she were evaluating the truth in his statement. Before she got the opportunity to reply he heard the disgusting voice of the man he recognised as his former master.

“Whatever deluded belief you have, do not make potentially catastrophic decisions.” Kenobi said, the same annoying air of superiority and concern evident in his voice.

Did he think Vader would harm Padme? He was here to save her. He had done all of this to save her.

But you failed didn’t you? You became a murderer for what? The same annoying voice in the back of his mind asked.

Reigning in his anger, that was threatening to explode. He forced himself to shut all the voices out. Right now, all that mattered was Padme. His family was all that ever mattered to him, really.

“Stay. Out of my way.” he ground out, his voice laced with anger despite his best efforts.

“You are confident in this?” Mothma asked.

“Do you believe I would harm her?” he asked, his voice now dangerously quiet.

The Chancellor was quiet for an agonisingly long amount of time before responding.

“Follow us.” She said, starting to walk before checking to see if he was following.

He fell into step with the group almost immediately.

They walked in silence through hallways for what felt like an eternity before the chancellor stopped in front of a door. The wing they were in seemed quiet. He could smell the familiar scent of disinfectant.

He heard the doors open but found himself suddenly unable to look or go inside. This. This was what he had worked for for so long; he was afraid now that he was being put to the test. He was never too good at tests. Neither as Vader nor Skywalker. He always ended up trying too hard and falling short of his own expectations.

But he did not have that option here. He had to succeed. No matter what the cost.

“Vader?” he heard Mothma’s voice call from inside the room, pulling him out of his own mind.

Forcing himself to think only about what was required of him, he strode into the room.

She was there. On the cot, having machines keep her alive. Over the years, he had memorised every single feature of his angel’s face. She looked almost peaceful here. But the Padme he knew and loved would never stay so idle in the face of someone like Sidious.

“Monitor her vitals. Inform me of when she is showing brain activity again.” Vader ordered to the medics in the room. If the doctor or her team were scared or surprised, they did not show it.

He saw the woman gesture to her team, and they immediately moved to take up positions around various monitors.

He slowly approached Padme and took her hand. It was warm. But far too still. Terrifyingly still. Now that it was finally time for action, he felt himself being shoved forward by some invisible force. It helped. It was making all the panicky voices in his head a little easier to ignore.

Closing his eyes, he first started to pull from the light.

Over the years he had learned that the dark side always left a mark. It would twist you into something so unrecognisable that even the ones you loved couldn’t bear to look at you.

It is what it had done to him. What he had done to himself.

That's when he had made up his mind that we would only use the light side or, at worst, only use the dark side to fuel himself while waking Padme.

He could not let his angel be corrupted by something as vile as that. He did not want the worst parts of his being to taint her.

He channelled the light side through him and into Padme. It felt alien. Strange. It hurt. But he could feel Padme’s life force getting brighter. Whatever wounds that were there slowly mending themselves.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed like that. But he could feel his arms burning, hear the wires in the prosthetics crackling from the amount of energy he was attempting to use.

“I can see minor brain activity!” one of the nurses called out.

“Not enough.” The doctor responded, now moving to hook up more IV bags to Padme.

He looked around briefly and saw that everyone in the room looked shocked, horrified and transfixed.

Why did they look horrified? He thought to himself, half delirious with pain. However, from what he could not pinpoint,

Then suddenly, he felt his prosthetics give out and so slack.

No. NO. He was so close. He knew it. Her vital monitors confirmed it.

So he closed his eyes again and disappeared into the hellscape that was his mind. It was dark. Pitch black. Almost pitch black. But there had always been that tiny spark of light that had survived. He had spent years trying to kill it. He spent hours living through torture by his master for his failure to kill it.

It lived where his happiest memories lived. When he first saw Padme. Memories of his time with his mother. When he first came to Corosaunt. When he met Padme again as a padawan. Their marriage. Every minute he had spent with her. The news of becoming a father. Finding her on Polis Massa, asleep but alive. And finally, of finding out his son had lived too.

It was minuscule compared to the oppressive darkness that was the rest of his mind, but he dragged it out. He needed to drain his own life force and give it to Padme. He wasn’t sure if it was doing anything medically as he couldn’t really see or hear anything anymore, but the image of her in his mind grew stronger.

Until she was standing there. Just like she did on that day on Mustafar.

She seemed confused. Perplexed at being stuck in a dark void.

“Padme?” he called out in his mind. He hadn’t expected a response. He wasn’t entirely sure what was going on.

But her head turned around to look at him. She really was here.

But then he was the sorrow and fear that welled up in her face.

Of course. She had told him then that she no longer recognised him. That he was not the man she loved. He supposed that would still apply.

Then he heard her.

“Ani?” her voice asked, sounding terrified of the answer it might receive.

He wanted to say it wasn’t his name anymore. That he no longer lived as that naive young man.

However, his shock and happiness at finally feeling her presence in the force had rendered him speechless. He was content right here. He could have spent an eternity just staring at her.

Looking at her, the expression on her face was now one of cautious curiosity.

“Anakin?” She asked again, this time walking a little closer in the void.

He could also vaguely hear other voices. Someone was shaking him. He was vaguely aware he wasn’t standing anymore. When had he ended up on the floor?

None of that mattered, though. He was stuck staring at his angel’s face.

She too seemed transfixed by something. The hope forming on her face was evident. He did not have the heart to tell her he was doomed to spend the rest of his life serving the dark side. It's what made him powerful. What he needed to keep his family safe. What he was now familiar with.

He was rudely interrupted however by his old master’s voice.

“Vader! You need to stop. Padme is awake and stable. Her brain waves are strong and consistent. She is back. You saved her.” he could hear the man screaming,

Of course, he had. He knew all of that. He was looking at his wife right now. What right did Kenobi have to disturb him in his own mind with irrelevant information.

Padme didn’t react to Kenobi’s voice, so he assumed that perhaps he was simply imagining things.

She was still looking at his face, trying to gauge something he could not understand.

It was so cold here. Although he didn’t remember it being that way. It was always too hot in his mind. A constant reminder of the lava that engulfed him on Mustafar.

Everything these days seemed to lead him to think about Mustafar. He wasn’t a fan.

He wanted to tell her he was so so sorry. For everything he had done. He wanted to ask her to live. To be happy.

“She would not want you to die for her. You are dooming her to a life of regret. You know that!” He heard Kenobi scream again.

On this score, Kenobi was right. His angel was too kind. Too caring.

But he also wanted to tell his old master that he certainly wasn’t dying right now. Sure, he could be better, but he didn’t feel the usual tiredness he felt all the time. This was probably the best he had felt in years. He wanted to take a nap right here. And he wanted to tell Kenobi to kriff off.

But before he could voice any of his thoughts, everything went dark.

Chapter Text

Leia had to assume that the Emperor must be a more tolerant man than anyone gave him credit for considering Vader’s mercurial nature.

One minute, the man was their enemy. Then, a spy. And now what a new member of the alliance?

That's not even getting into the fact that he somehow got his admiral to tag along. With his wife and kids.

Then there was the whole - ‘I need to save my wife right now’ - thing. To say Leia had been doubtful was being too kind.

‘Had been’ was the operative phrase there though.

She had watched as the man strode into the room, took the senator's hand with gentleness than she could never believe he was capable of and closed his eyes.

Now, the medical team was scrambling around checking her vitals, and all the monitors were beeping.

“I can see minor brain activity” one of the nurses exclaimed excitedly.

“Not enough”. Dr.Culis said, her voice still hopeful but grim.

“No.NO.” she heard Vader growl and turned her attention to the maniac again.

Was he on fire?

The smoke curling off of his robes and the horrific smell of burnt meat indicated this must be the case. But there was no fire. And Vader seemed as fine as he could be.

However, her attention was quickly taken again by the sparks flying and burning the dark lord's robes. They were coming from what looked like his two prosthetic arms, which were just sort of laying on top of the senator’s hand. How do you fry two prosthetic arms in a manner of 15 minutes? He had only started doing whatever he was doing fifteen kriffing minutes ago. And now someone who had no hope of waking up was showing a considerable amount of brain activity.

Leia could feel her anger flare up. With all this power, all the man had done was kill.

She was snapped out of her own thoughts by the cheers of the medical staff.

“She’s back!” the doc declared.

“She might need a few days in advanced bacta and a lot of therapy but she’s back.” Dr Culis repeated again as if she didn’t really believe her own words.

“You are sure? Absolutely sure?” she heard General Kenobi ask. The man looked like he was going to weep from happiness and relief.

Whatever Vader had done had worked.

She could see even Mon smiling as her old friend came back. Dadoona had a kind smile and Reeikan looked bewildered but enthusiastic, nonetheless.

Even Leia couldn’t help but smile. She could finally meet the person who her parents had held in such high regard. In a small way, the more people that remembered her parents the more real their presence in the galaxy felt.

They were all pulled out of the happy moment by someone yelling.

“No!” She heard Kenobi yell as he ran with more agility than what should have been possible for someone his age towards Vader.

He barely got to him soon enough to make the now unconscious Vader slump against and slide down the nearby wall rather than fall, hit his head and die.

She wasn’t sure he should have done that.

The general was now shaking Vader by the shoulder in an attempt to snap the Sith out of whatever strange trance he was in.

The hood had fallen off now to reveal the man’s face. The faceless terror that had allowed Palpatine to rule the galaxy with an iron fist was now slumped against a wall, staring blankly into space, his eyes unfocused

The eyes were what she noticed first. At first glance, she assumed they were yellow. How on earth did humans get yellow eyes? But as she actually observed the man, she realised his eyes were actually blue but had a ring of bright, burning yellow around the outer edge of his iris.

This did nothing to answer Leia’s question.

But what hurt her though was that even over the many scars, injuries and burns that littered the man’s face and the short regulation style greying hair, she could see Luke. The blue in their eyes was the same. The blond hair they shared was apparent even through the few strands of it that ran through the older man’s hair. His face shared too many of Luke's features.

Leia had hoped the man would look nothing like her friend. That he would be the exact opposite of everything Luke was. But Vader looked too similar to Luke. Too human for her to accept.

“Vader! You need to stop. Padme is awake and stable. Her brain waves are strong and consistent. She is back. You saved her.” She heard General Kenobi yell in a panicked tone she could never have associated with the man.

Vader’s head just fell forward.

“She would not want you to die for her. You are dooming her to a life of regret. You know that!” General Kenobi yelled at the man again.

There was a pool of blood now steadily forming on the floor. Whatever Vader did, it looked like it would kill him if no one intervened.

Should they intervene?

She didn’t get a chance to form an answer in her mind as Kenobi spoke again.

“For force’s sake, Anakin, you never learn to not go too far!” the man hissed as he raised his hands to Vader’s temple, holding his head up. Kenobi too, was doing whatever it was that Vader had initially done to the Senator.

“Keep him alive. He is no use to us dead.” She heard Mon say from beside her to the team of medical professionals watching this unfold, unsure of what to do now that they had ensured Senator Amidala’s survival.

The doctor nodded and was immediately at Vader’s side, with a few nurses assisting her.

‘Get a gurney. Looks like a clean shot through the stomach. We can fix this is surgery.” Dr. Culis said, checking Vader’s now actually unconscious form.

General Kenobi was sitting on the floor beside Vader now. Struggling to catch his breath as if he had just run a marathon.

Leia quickly made her way over and crouched near him.

“Are you alright? Why would you try to do something that clearly got Vader almost killed?” Leia asked, baffled at the man’s sudden interest in saving Vader’s life.

Wasn’t he the one who was training Luke to kill Vader (Luke’s father, Leia realised grimly.) until a few months ago.

After being followed around by Leia for two weeks, General Kenobi had finally agreed to tell Luke the truth about his mother and father. She could not understand why Kenobi couldn’t see how much committing patricide would hurt Luke? (or anyone as a matter of fact.) She doubted Luke would care about the fact that the father in question was Darth Vader.

Luke was the most compassionate person she knew. He would somehow attempt to save his forsaken sire. She was sure of that. Luke really was an idiot sometimes.

Killing the man would have destroyed Luke. She didn’t have the force like them, but it felt right. That was the right thing to do.

At the time though, Leia had assumed Luke would get months to process the unwelcome news.

He had gotten barely two weeks.

And now Vader was dying, right here.

Really, perhaps there was some curse that haunted the Skywalker family. How could every single member’s life go so catastrophically wrong?

Having caught his breath, General Kenobi started to get up, with Leia helping him find his footing.

Once he seemed to have recovered from that ordeal, he spoke.

“I did not do what he was attempting. He was draining his life force to restore hers. But he got too lost. He couldn’t get himself out of it. Had I not intervened, he would have drained away his entire life force.” General Kenobi explained as if any of this was somehow normal.

The medical team had disappeared with Vader into the operating theatre some time ago.

“Will he survive?” Mon asked, sounding irritated at the suicidal Sith lord they now had to handle.

“Oh yes. He will be fine as per his standards. Perhaps not combat-ready for some time, but fine.” General Kenobi replied as if he had had this exact conversation one too many times in his life.

Clearly, this was a trait that Vader and Anakin Skywalker shared.

She wondered briefly how he had survived so many battles if he solved the problems he was given without forethought.

“What did you do?” Leia asked.

“I merely made him unconscious. Shutting down his mind by force. I healed the wound a little. The medics should be able to handle the rest.” Kenobi explained.

“Force users can do that?” Reeikan asked.

Leia had the same question. She had just seen two people get saved from near-death experiences. Her mind couldn’t help but think of the soldiers who had died for the alliance’s cause.

“It can be done. To attempt something of the magnitude Vader just did, you need a lot of power—a strong connection to the force. And its consequences are visible to you. As for what I did, I did not heal the massive wound he sustained or restore his life force. I just prevented him from killing himself and bought the medics some time. Medical science is what will save him.” Kenobi responded, understanding the unasked question that hung between them.

How many people could have been saved had they just been lucky enough to be around a trained force user when they got hurt? How many had died of usually harmless wounds just because they didn’t have access to the care they needed in time?

General Kenobi clearly understood the immense weight he carried. Suddenly, Leia wasn’t enthusiastic about the prospect of Luke becoming a Jedi. What sort of burden were they putting on him?

No one had asked if he wanted to be a Jedi. He was born force sensitive and so it was assumed he simply would be. That he would fight for their cause. With a chill running down her spine, she realised that it was decided the second Luke was born. Kenobi had been watching Luke for 20 years, only to have him kill his own father without knowing it.

Perhaps Anakin Skywalker’s disillusionment with the Jedi Order shouldn’t be as surprising as it seemed to be to everyone.

“But it worked. He did what he had burned down the whole galaxy to do. What Master Yoda and I failed to do when Luke was born.” Kenobi said, his voice quiet and solemn. As if what transpired here would alter the fate of the galaxy.

And horrifyingly enough, she understood it. Vader had done what he apparently set out to do. He had succeeded. All his fears had been proven right and his chosen path had led him to the solution. What would the Sith lord do once he got out of surgery? Would he suddenly remember his desire for the throne and kill them all?

What had they gotten themselves into?

“You think he will betray us?” Leia asked Kenobi, suddenly alarmed.

The old Jedi seemed to think for some time before answering.

“I don’t think so. Something has changed. I remember him being convinced of the superiority of Sidious’s plan. He really believed and trusted the man. He was like a grandfather to him from a young age.” the General replied.

“Sidious?” Leia couldn’t help but notice. From the context, Kenobi must be referring to Palpatine. But why did he call him Sidious?

The Jedi’s face grew grim as if this was the single most traumatising piece of information he was about to give.

“It's time you all know. Palpatine is a Sith Lord as well. He is immensely powerful in the force. When I say Palpatine is Vader’s master I mean that literally. He is the master. Vader is the apprentice. That is the rule of two.” General Kenobi explained.

Sorry, what?

So, the old fiend was also a Sith lord now. Magnificent. As if she needed another reason to want to lobe the tyrant’s head off.

The others in the room though didn’t seem too surprised.

“It explains too much. It explains everything. We knew he was the one behind the Clone Wars. I suppose we never realised he was a Sith Lord as well.” Mothma said, her voice stern and tight like he was recalling her greatest failing.

“No one knew at the time, Chancellor. No one. Some in the Jedi council suspected Palpatine, but no one thought it possible for a Sith Lord to orchestrate a whole war right under our watch. Our arrogance was what Sidious used to destroy us.” Kenobi offered Mon as reassurance.

Knowing her mentor though, it would do nothing of the sort.

“You are certain that whatever led Vader to turn on his master is permanent?” Reeikan asked Kenobi.

“I believe so. His actions don’t make sense otherwise. Whatever he is thinking now, knowing him, killing Sidious is likely a large part of it.” Kenobi confirmed.

He seemed sure of this. Perhaps the force was telling him something or maybe he just knew the man better than they did. Either way, Leia hoped he was right.

A nurse walked into the room and moved towards Senator Amidala’s cot.

“We are moving her to a bacta tank. We can wake her in two days.” She informed the group as they looked at her expectantly.

“Thank you.” Mon replied, slightly inclining her head to show her gratitude. The nurse nodded and rolled the bed out of the room.

“Vader will probably be in surgery for a while. No point standing around here. I will have the Doctor send us a report on his status.” Mon said, looking at the group.

“I will call a meeting once I get it. Please, get back to your duties.” Mon said decidedly, ending this bizarre conversation.

“I should stay back. The news of his arrival will spread fast. And in case something happens to Padme…I should be here.” General Kenobi said.

“Very well.” Mon replied, picking up on the Jedi’s silent request to be left alone.

With that, Leia went back to her duties on the base.

Leia almost got five hours without having to think about their latest gamble.

Leia was almost done chewing out Han for forgetting to put the falcon’s Hyperdrive back together when her comm beeped.

“I swear, Han, we need the damn Hyperdrive to be functional. Quit taking it apart every fucking day.” Leia said for what felt like a millionth time.

“Relax, Princess. Chewie and I can put it back together in a jiffy. We were just trynna improve her.” Han replied, as laid back as always.

The man made her want to scream. To punch that smug smile off his stupidly good-looking face. She needed to walk away before she did something stupid.

“Just. Fix it.” Leia said, turning around and walking away.

She heard Han throw another one of his remarks at her. She had to fight furiously against the smile that was forming on her face.

A task made infinitely easier by the topic at hand for the meeting.

“I have the report here. He is stable. He should be awake in a few days. General Kenobi here suggested keeping him asleep till his stitches dissolved.” Mon reported as soon as they all had taken their seats.

“He had a tendency to overestimate the healing prowess of the human body.” General Kenobi mumbled.

“I called you all here because of more concerning reports about his general health.” Mon said looking disgruntled at even having consider the monster’s health.

No one at the table offered a reply to that.

“The current wound we treated seems to be from the Royal Guards. So, it is safe to assume he had some kind of encounter with the Emperor. All his limbs are prosthetics. He seems to have sustained severe burns all over his body at some point in time, although that seems to have been addressed to some extent. There was evidence of major spinal reconstruction surgery and lung reconstruction surgery. His other organs seem…functional. His chronic pain levels have been noted to be at a 7. But what concerns us is his arrhythmia.” Mon said, her eyes slowly moving down the long list of things wrong with Vader.

Apparently, they had been fighting someone who was barely alive and were still losing somehow. Leia did not want to think about what kind of power he possessed when he was young.

Although she couldn’t help but wonder if Luke had inherited the same power.

She mentally shook herself. She would not see him as a tool. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right.

“You mean he has a heart problem?” Reeikan asked with bared concealed laughter.

“Not sure we needed a medic to tell us that.” He added not trying to hide his laughter anymore.

Leia had to clench her jaws to prevent herself from laughing. Admittedly, being told the murderer had a heart problem was hilarious.

Mon shot General Reeikan a disapproving look. But her eyes still shone with amusement.

“Yes. He seems to have been…electrocuted consistently for years now. It’s done significant damage to his heart. Although not an immediate concern, we should be wary of it when we are sending him out to fight. I don’t intend to let him die without at least killing Palpatine.” Mon concluded, putting the report down.

“How do you get electrocuted for years?” Dadoona asked, confused.

“Force Lightning. Master Yoda mentioned that Sidious seemed to favour it during their battle. I assume it was his preferred mode of discipline. Sith masters are not known to be kind to their apprentices.” General Kenobi explained.

Leia wished he would stop telling them facts that made it possible to feel even the slightest sympathy for Vader. It was messing with her worldview. She knew the galaxy wasn’t split into good and evil. But she did not think she would ever come to pity Vader. Because so far, his life sounded pathetic. Even to her.

“Well, it doesn’t sound too serious if it isn’t an immediate concern. There must be a cure, surely?” Admiral Ackbar asked.

“Yes. He would need a pacemaker, and it would have to be replaced every ten years or so. But it's neither expensive nor complex.” Mon answered.

There was more silence following this.

“What are you asking us, Chancellor?” Dadoona asked.

It was pretty clear what she was asking them.

“Do we share this information with Vader and provide him treatment or simply use him till it kills him?” Mothma asked.

Leia hated Vader. Truly. He watched her entire planet get blown up without lifting a finger. But she was raised on Alderaan. There were certain principles you simply did not violate.

“We cannot withhold potentially deadly information from anyone. Not even him. If he wants to be treated or not is his own decision. But we cannot deny any being healthcare. Even prisoners on death row get healthcare. ‘Using him until he dies’ is inhuman. Vader deserves to die. But we shouldn’t be dishing out justice without any restrictions. Especially since he is willing to cooperate with us. If he gets himself killed, it is another matter altogether. This however is wrong.” Leia voiced her opinion.

There seemed to be general agreement within the room. Even Mon looked a little proud of her.

She hated advocating for that monster. But what they were doing sounded a little too much like what Palpatine himself seemed to have been doing to Vader. She wasn’t going to turn into a bigger monster than Vader just for the sake of vengeance.

Besides, nothing in the galaxy could be done to seek revenge for Alderaan. If there was anything she learned from being forced to come to terms with the moral implication of allying with Vader, it is that despite the damage he had personally done, he was still very much a cog in the Imperial machine. And one she had learned from her research was an easily replaceable one should the emperor find someone of suitable power. She had gotten her hands on records that had Vader under the command of Tarkin, Motti and many other Moffs and even Grand Admirals.

She now understood why Luke had been hidden on Tatooine, far away from the Empire. Now knowing about Vader’s poor health, The Emperor would have replaced him with Luke without a second thought.

All this only seemed to make her angrier towards Vader though. It made no sense why he kept serving the Empire. Kept causing so much pain and misery. Anyone who sought to cause pain simply because they had been hurt was pathetic as far as she was concerned.

“Thats all then. The Admiral, whose name is Piett, gave us the location of the Death Squadron. They left them on Fondor. Their next destination is Atollon. They have gotten news of increased rebel activity there. I have already issued a warning to our forces in the sector.” Mothma reported on the staggering number of things that had happened in the last five hours alone. She would kill for a slow day.

“We will reconvene with Senator Amidala in two days' time if nothing of note takes place.” Mon said, standing up to indicate that the meeting had been dismissed.

The next meeting was going to be interesting, to say the least.

Chapter Text

Suddenly, the world just was. The first thing she remembered feeling was panic. She had just given birth to her children. Where were her children?

The next was fear. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t see. She couldn’t speak. She couldn't hear. Clearly, she was breathing as she could feel the air enter and leave her lungs. She could feel her limbs and her body, but they all seemed to no longer be under her control.

Next, she felt irritation. There was a dull pain in both her arms. The kind that was annoying more than painful.

But slowly, she realised she could feel more. She couldn’t move them but now her body felt more real. It felt like hers.

She wasn’t sure how long she waited there. But things seemed to be improving. Logically, she should wake up soon.

Then she heard a voice that sounded so familiar yet so strange. She couldn’t make out what the person said. But she was aware of there being noises around her.

Then suddenly, she was in a dark void. Well, a different Void. Here she was standing. She could feel her arms and legs fully. But this too didn’t feel quite real. She was much better now. Not as tired. Not as…trapped. But she was still stuck in this dark place. It wasn’t as scary as the last one. This one at least felt alive.

“Padme?” She heard a voice call out from behind her.

She would never fail to recognise that voice. No matter how different it sounded. It was Anakin—her Ani.

No, but that wasn’t the case any longer, was it?

She turned around to see him standing there. The awful yellow eyes were visible even from a distance. Suddenly, memories of Mustafar rushed through her. She wanted to scream at him, hit him, tell him to see reason and drag him back home if she had to. She wanted to punch him in the face for raising his hand against her. Right now, she had half a mind to simply turn around a walk into the endless dark that surrounded them, consequences be damned.

Perhaps this was some kind of insane dream she was having. Surely, she must have fallen asleep after giving birth to the twins. Possibly even placed in a temporary coma. She had felt herself start to slip away but she was definitely alive now. Wherever she was, she was here.

But that didn’t quite make sense either. The more she looked at the man in front of her, the more different he seemed to be.

“Ani?” she called out, her voice trembling despite her efforts.

She got no reply.

Well. Clearly, whatever this place was, it wasn’t intent on harming her. It had done nothing until now. Besides, that felt wrong. Anakin would tell her it was the force.

She walked forward a little towards…Anakin…since that was the only direction that was discernible. The closer she got, the more man seemed to age. But as she got close enough, it was unmistakably Anakin.

But he was older. Hair short and grey. Faced marred by scars and burns. Eyes sucken from lack of sleep. But it was Anakin. He was wearing a strange uniform under his robes though. Not the Jedi robes she remembered. The entire colour scheme seemed even darker than she last remembered.

“Anakin?” she called again this time more sure of herself. From afar, she had gotten the impression that his eyes were entirely yellow. But upon closer inspection, they were mostly the same blue she remembered. Surrounded by that horrid yellow and holding more grief than she remembered. But it was still the same.

Still, there was no response. She suddenly felt older too as if the few steps she had taken had aged her rapidly. Her body didn’t quite feel the same as she remembered.

Then, the thought struck her.

If she had been put in a coma, how long had it been? This wasn’t a dream. It couldn’t be. She had never seen Anakin like this. The clothes were entirely unfamiliar. Her mind would not make up such specific details she had never seen before.

That and the blood on Anakin’s clothes. To her relief, they seemed to be his own. She was then hit with the fact that she was relieved her husband was hurt. But it was because it meant it wasn’t someone else's.

She knew the gravity and extent of his crimes that night. But he could atone. Dying or hiding was the coward's way out. He could try to fix his mistakes. That's why she went to Mustafar then. She was ready to stand beside him and help him atone for all of it.

Yes, she was sure now. Time had definitely passed. And by how Anakin looked, quite a bit of it.

What about her children then? Suddenly, her curiosity was replaced by fear and panic. What would have happened to her children if she had not been around to take care of them? Does Anakin have them? Did that mean Palpatine had them?

No. That could not be. It had not to have happened. She refused to accept the alternative.

Anakin would protect his children from the monster when it came down to it. She was sure of that. But were they ok? Or where they like how she remembered her beloved Anakin then?

A Sith?

No, wait. Why was Anakin so angry then? Right! Obi-wan. He was with her when she named the twins.

Luke and Leia.

Yoda was there too. That meant that her children were in the hands of the Jedi. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that being the only alternative. She would have wanted them to be with their family. Not grow up devoid of love and affection under the sect’s strict rules.

She had a million questions. She looked to ask Anakin, but then, just as suddenly as she was, she was gone.

___________________________________________

She was awake again. She was getting tired of being put to sleep against her will. But this time was different. For a start, she was definitely awake. Not like when she was in the void but like she was waking up from a very, very long nap. She knew she could feel her body because it felt sore. She knew she was breathing because it felt alien.

She could also hear. There was a conversation going on around her.

“I don’t think it's wise for us all to be here. It might be too much. You were with her last General Kenobi. You should be with her now.” She heard an unfamiliar young female voice say.

“I agree. Mom’s bound to be disoriented.” another voice was heard. Mom? Luke. The realisation hit her and she wanted to jump out of this wretched cot and check on them. Are they ok? Where was Leia? He sounded older. How much has she missed? She felt herself longing for something she didn’t even know she had lost until a few seconds ago.

“You are right, Luke. I will call for you once she is caught up with our…situation.” she heard Obi-wan say. That was at least one voice she recognised.

“I agree as well. Let's wait outside.” She heard Mon say. So they had both lived! So clearly, something drastic had happened. Even in this state, she wasn’t foolish enough to think everything was ok. If it were, she would have been with her husband and children right now. She wouldn’t have to wonder where they were and what they looked like.

She heard the doors shut soon after.

She wanted to open her eyes and demand Kenobi tell her everything. But she physically couldn’t. Her eyes felt heavy. So incredibly heavy. It would have been easier to fall asleep, but she wanted to open them. She had questions, and she wanted answers.

After struggling for a while, finally, her eyes opened slowly. It took them a minute to adjust. She was staring at the ceiling of a dimly lit room. It smelled like a hospital. Mostly the same smell she last remembered. She hadn’t even gotten to hold her children to know how new babies smelled. Her mother had told her it was the first thing she noticed when both Padme and Sola were born.

“Hello, Padme.” She heard Obi-wan say from her right.

She tried to sit up. To see where she was. To see someone real. Anyone.

It must have been evident because she heard him move and suddenly felt her bed rise up to a more sitting position.

Now that she could see the room, it was clearly a small hospital room. Dimly lit and sparsely furnished. But right now, it felt like heaven.

“It will take a few hours for the anaesthetic to wear off and for you to regain complete mobility. You will need to re-learn a lot of things, though.” she heard Obi-wan’s voice again.

She turned to her right slightly and saw…an old man. With considerable shock and concern, she realised it was indeed Obi-Wan.

Her thought process must have seen on her face because he chuckled.

“Yes, time has not been very kind to me.” she heard him say.

Thats right. Time.

“How much time?” She asked. Unlike in the void, her voice was raspy and unfamiliar. Like it hadn’t been used in a long time.

A very long time if the sorrow and age lines on Obi-wan’s face was anything to go by.

“Just tell me.” She repeated, struggling to even her voice out.

“20 Years.” came the dreaded reply.

Initially she was a little relieved. Obi-wan was right; time had not been kind to him.

Then, the reality of the situation hit her. 20 years. She had spent nearly the same amount of time awake as she had spent in a coma.

It meant her children were 20 years old now. Adults. Not the tiny little beings she remembered seeing.

She swallowed and simply allowed the tears to fall down her face.

“Luke and Leia?” she asked. She didn’t need to elaborate.

This time though Obi-wan offered her a sad smile.

“Both of them are here. Outside. Leia used to be the Princess and Senator of Alderaan. She looks just like you. Bail and Berah adopted her. Luke is being trained by me. He was adopted by Anakin’s step-brother and his wife - Owen and Beru Lars. Luke knew they were his aunt and uncle. He looks just like Anakin. Although both of them seemed to have inherited your stature.” Obi-Wan told her, clearly trying to fit as many details as he could.

And Padme drank all of it in. Second-hand or not, she wanted to know her children. She wasn’t someone who would wallow in what had been lost. She was here now, and she would be as much of a mother to them as they allowed her to be.

She was glad to know both Luke and Leia had gone to loving homes. She knew Bail and Berah had been desperately wanting a baby girl of their own. Her daughter would have been dotted on all her life.

She remembered Owen and Beru. While she did not know them well, she knew them to be good people. She knew her son had a safe and loving home.

However, why Obi-wan decided to separate them or send Luke so far away was beyond her.

She knew either couple would not have objected to taking in both the children. She was sure of it in Bail and Berah’s case. Siblings should grow up together.

But before meeting her children, she needed to know one more thing.

She remembered the last words she said now.

There is still good in him.

“Anakin. What happened? And just tell me the truth, Obi-wan. Twenty years is a lot of information to catch up on. I don’t have the patience for your cryptic Jedi messages.” She asked Obi-Wan.

She knew this was the bad news from how Obi-wan’s entire being seemed to grow weary.

“It is a long and unpleasant story.” he offered weakly. He knew that would not be a deterrent for her. If anything, it was adding fuel to the fire.

She simply stayed silent, giving him no option but to go on. Sighing, he continued,

“On Mustafar…we fought. He lost.” Obi-wan started.

“That explains the scars and the burns.” Padme added, nodding. So it wasn’t a dream.

Obi-wan seemed to be surprised by that.

“I…saw him. At least, I think I did. I was in a sort of dark void. And he was there. He looked older. And I didn’t recognise his uniform. So I concluded it wouldn’t have been a dream.” Padme offered as an explanation.

Obi-wan nodded in response. Clearly, he knew more about that place than he let on.

“There is still good in him.” Padme repeated. She had seen it. She had felt it. The man she saw was not the Anakin she had met on Mustafar. It might not have been the one who tried to impress her all those years ago on Naboo, but she recognised him. This was Anakin.

To her surprise, Obi-wan didn’t immediately reject the idea.

“You are referring to his eyes. It's never a definitive indication, Padme. After all, the Palpatine we knew looked as ordinary as everyone else.” Obi-wan reasoned. Although she could tell he didn’t believe it.

Because it wasn’t just his eyes.

“I know there are no guarantees. I am not expecting to get the Anakin I knew back just the way he was. I am not sure I am the Padme you knew all those years ago. And I doubt you are the Obi-Wan you were 20 years ago. But it wasn’t just his eyes. There was something different. He wasn’t the man I met on Mustafar, but there was something wrong. He seemed…” Padme replied, her voice trailing off as she searched for the right term.

“Blurry?” Obi-wan asked.

As bizarre as that sounded, it fit.

“I am not sure how you gauged that. But his force presence reflects the same. It's sluggish. Dark and dangerous as expected from a dark side user but more like a broken beast.” Obi-wan continued more to himself than her.

“What was he doing all this time?” she asked. She knew she wouldn’t like the answer. She was no fool.

Obi-Wan looked like he would rather be anywhere but here. But the discomfort of having to tell her all this seemed like a good enough punishment for sneaking onto her ship then. She knew he meant well. But she did not appreciate being used.

“Palpatine re-organised the republic and established an authoritarian Empire with himself at the helm. As his apprentice, Vader - Anakin - served as his second in command. He mostly worked with the Navy.” Obi-wan explained.

Vader. Is that what he was calling himself now?

Well, it's a stupid name. She was not going to call him that.

She didn’t need Obi-Wan to tell her what ‘served as the second in command meant’. She knew Palpatine. The list of things Anakin had to atone must have just gotten infinitely longer under the Empire.

She blamed Anakin, of course. He had made that desperate and idiotic choice that day. Caused so much pain and suffering. Killed so many. But the bulk of her rage was directed at Palpatine. He had played Anakin. He had played her. He had played the entire galaxy.

But she knew the question she really wanted to ask. The one she desperately hoped would be met with an affirmative.

Before that, she needed to know where she was.

“Where are we, Obi-wan?” Padme asked, not really too worried. If Obi-wan, Mon and her children were her, she was among friends.

“The few who opposed Palpatine in the senate along with you formed a rebellion. It was formally established recently, but they have been in operation for years now. We are at their main base on Hoth.” Obi-wan answered without trying to comfort her. He knew the words alone would be all she needed.

The galaxy hadn’t stopped fighting. That meant there was still hope.

Suddenly, she felt more tears running down her face. This time, it was spurred on by anger. Someone had snatched 20 years of her life from her. Twenty years she should have spent fighting that tyrant.

Anakin must have played a part. She remembered the pain. It has sent her into an early labour. But she remembered naming the twins well. She didn’t feel any worse than what she would have expected to after giving birth to two children. She even remembered feeling happiness.

She had already decided she could get Anakin back. Desperately telling Obi-Wan the same.

Then she felt herself slowly fading away.

She did not remember much after that. Only Obi-wan’s panicked face while holding Leia and him yelling for Yoda.

“What happened?” She asked yet again, but this time, her voice felt surer. There was a lot she would need to learn and catch up on. But she knew what she needed.

Obi-wan knew what she was asking. But it wasn’t grief or anger that coloured his face this time. It was something else she couldn’t quite place.

“I don’t know. One moment, you were fine. Hurt, tired but fine. Then we started losing you. Me and Master Yoda had to use whatever energy and power we had left to keep your life from being drained away. We didn’t know who. I suspect Palpatine. There was no way Vader would have been in any condition to attempt something of that scale. But there is no way to be sure.” Obi-wan explained, suddenly all the weariness gone.

So someone had indeed stolen the last twenty years from her.

“Thank you. Thank you both for saving my life.” she replied.

Obi-wan just smiled sadly before replying.

“It wasn’t us that finally woke you. It was Vader. What he did or how he knew to do what he did is a mystery to me. But he figured it out.” he said, his voice now more solemn.

In a way, she had known that before she ever heard the words.

She nodded in response.

There really was only one other question left to ask. They both knew it. But she dreaded the answer. She had lost so much. But Obi-wan’s statement implied that Anakin had finally seen Palpatine to be the monster he was.

“Is he here?” Padme heard herself ask, as if she was floating somewhere above her body.

“Yes. Vader is here.” Obi-wan responded stiffly. She did not understand why Kenobi refused to call him Anakin. But perhaps for him, that was easier to accept than the reality. He hadn’t been there during the Tusken Raider incident. He had never gotten a glimpse of the man he now called Vader before that day on Mustafar. She always knew there was a latent darkness that lived within ani. But she had never envisioned it would grow to the scale it did.

But now that she knew her family and the cause she believed in was alive and well, she felt truly awake. She felt like she could do something now. First on her list was meeting her children. Then it was punching Anakin in the face. Then, she fully intended to join the Rebellion. She knew Mon and Bail must be a part of it. Whoever was fighting Palpatine, she was with theṃ.

“I want to see Leia and Luke. Then Anakin.” She said, her tone harsher than she intended. She was just determined. She would fix this.

However, the plans that were already forming within her mind were brought to a halt by the look on Obi-wan’s face. For the lack of a better description, he looked like a child caught doing something wrong.

“What did you do?” she asked her friend. He had done so much for her family already. She knew that whatever he did, he did it with good intentions.

“I- Luke knows about his parents. Both you and Vader. He knows Vader was once Anakin. Leia knows that, too, as a member of the High Command, but…she does not know of her biological connection to him. Or you.” Obi-wan replied, his tone indicating he wasn’t thrilled with the situation.

Of course. Leia had been raised by parents. Luke did not have that. It made sense that since they were separated at birth, they would neither know of each other nor their biological parents.

Oh, Luke. She wondered if her son was alright. Finding out all this when he was still so young must have been horrible. To be born into a war he had no way of escaping.

This, however, meant Leia had no idea who she was. And if she understood what Obi-wan was implying he was asking her to keep it that way.

She took a deep breath and calmed her mind. While she knew what she wanted, it would take her a while to come to terms with her current reality. It would take time to accept and understand it.

But for now, she agreed with Obi-Wan. Until she had found her own footing in this new world, her daughter would be better off not knowing her complicated family situation.

“I understand. Bail and Berah are her parents after all. I will not interfere with their lives.” Padme replied, failing to keep the pain out of her voice.

Her daughter had a family. And she would never truly be her mother.

“That's the other thing, Padme…the Organas are no more. Alderaan is no more. I know it doesn’t make sense; I know it doesn’t even seem possible, but the whole planet and everyone who was on it is gone.” Obi-Wan continued drowning her in the information she didn’t even know how to comprehend.

How could an entire planet be gone? What did that even mean? Suddenly, she wanted to cry. Oh, Leia. She was once a ruler herself. She was not sure how she would survive if her home simply did not exist anymore. Leia had lost her parents at such a young age to a tragedy whose scale she wasn’t even sure she could ever understand.

She could feel a cold pit forming in her stomach as she realised what this could mean.

“Did he- Did Anakin?” she choked out, hoping Kenobi understood what she was asking.

Obi-wan’s face reflected her own grief.

“Not directly, no. He was onboard the weapon that destroyed it. However, it was under Wilhuff Tarkin’s command. He was tasked with interrogating Leia and finding the Rebel base. That was what Leia thought would have been the target. But Tarkin seemed to have been seeking a more effective demonstration. So he ordered the Planet…gone. He isn’t responsible directly. He was under Tarkin’s command as far as we know. But their blood is still nonetheless partially on his hand, I suppose.” Obi-Wan answered her question, pain evident in his voice.

First, she felt relief. Then guilt for feeling that relief. She was glad to have a way to rationalise the fact that Anakin hadn’t stooped to the level of Planetary destruction and Genocide. But he had let it happen. And to make things worse, he had hurt his own daughter. She knew the name Tarkin. It was a prominent one even during the Republic. But under his orders or not, hurting his own children didn’t fit in with Anakin’s general mindset. He was always protective of those he loved. Those he saw as his. He would not hurt them if he knew.

“He doesn’t know about Luke and Leia?” Padme asked.

“He only found out about Luke recently. He was the pilot who destroyed the horrific Planet Killer that Palpatine created. That's what brought him to the Empire’s attention. But he does not know about Leia. At least not really. Leia mentioned Vader seemed disturbed after seeing her. Perhaps he saw her resemblance to you. He left much faster than Leia anticipated. I do not think he has made the connection yet.” Obi-wan said, thinking out loud. He seemed to be figuring this out as they went too.

The relief that flooded her when she learned that such a weapon no longer existed in the galaxy was incomparable to anything else she had felt in life. She might have only known of its existence for a few minutes, but it was already too long. Such a thing should never have been created, let alone used.

Seems like one could always trust Palpatine to create horrors beyond her imagination.

Then, she could feel the pride swelling within her heart. She felt so proud of her children. Luke for fighting against such unfair odds, and Leia for her strength and wisdom. Both her children were incredible. She already knew enough to draw that conclusion.

She also felt a small amount of relief. Seems like some traces of the Anakin she knows lives with this Vader. It had recognised his own child and finally drove him to see reason.

It was a start.

She realised in all this she had forgotten to ask another important question.

“Was I here all this time?” Padme asked, suddenly feeling a little lost. She didn’t know where she had been for the last 20 years.

“For the first ten years following the birth of the twins, me and Master Yoda decided to keep you safe at the Pollis Massa Medical Center. We didn’t know if Vader would go looking for you. So we faked both you and your unborn child’s funeral to throw him off. But he found you more by coincidence than anything else around ten years ago. You have been under his charge until he sent you here. Why, I don’t know.” Obi-wan explained.

Logically, she knew she had been safe. She had been at a medical facility and later with Ani. But it felt strange to have moved to so many places and not remember any of it,

She felt older. She wasn’t sure how, but cognitively, she was aware she was now 20 years older than she was. It felt like she did age but, at the same time, experienced nothing new. Learned nothing new.

Like time had simply passed her by as she waited.

“I think I understand the situation now, Obi-wan. Please, I would like to see Luke at least.” Padme decided, sighing. She had been aware for barely an hour from the time she could see the chrono on the wall. But it felt like she had been in that room for twenty years.

“I see no reason why you can’t meet them both, Padme. I will let Luke in first. He has been not so patiently waiting for the last two days you spent in bacta. I will give you two time before I let the others in. The high command members are outside as well.” Obi-was replied, his tone lighter and happier. He got up and walked towards the door and offered her a smile before opening the door.

She couldn’t help but smile back. She would see her children now. No matter how horrid the galaxy’s state, she would cherish this moment forever.

She couldn’t help but feel self-conscious as she waited for Luke to come in. Would she be able to be a good mother? When she was pregnant, there was no time to think about any of that. But now that she had to face her children, she was afraid of disappointing them. More so than how she felt as a monarch.

She heard the doors to the room open, and Luke walked it.

Padme thought it would be impossible to love someone so much when all she had gotten to do was see them once moments after their birth.

But it was incredible to see her son.

He was the perfect mixture of her and Anakin. While she could see the more obvious resemblance to Anakin, there was something in the way he had already started calling her ‘Mom’ and the sense of calm he brought with him that was more akin to her.

Anakin was always a more active presence in a room. More turbulent. Their son seemed to make the room brighter and calmer simply by his presence.

The boy stared at her with such awe that she suddenly felt like she could only ever disappoint him.

Deciding to break the silence, Padme spoke first.

“Hello, Luke.” She offered. She didn’t want to scare her kids off. She knew that she had been gone for a long time.

After she spoke, Luke walked closer, hovering near the chair Obi-Wan had been occupying. He seemed to be hesitating about something. Biting his lips nervously. He looked anywhere but at her.

She wanted to cry. She wanted to hug and apologise. To tell him she loves him.

But it was Luke that surprised her before she processed any of her thoughts.

“Can I hug you? Would that be ok?” Luke asked, nervously as if he expected her to say no.

Padme didn’t reply for a bit, purely out of shock. She could not believe what was happening.

“You don’t have to! If it's too soon, that is-” Luke started, but Padme cut him off before he could finish his thought.

“Of course you can. You have no idea how much I missed you. I should have been there to raise you. From the start.” she said, raising her arms slightly. It hurt but she didn’t care.

Luke’s eyes lit up so quickly that she could no longer hold her tears at bay.

Luke gently wrapped his arms around and she held her son like her life depended on it. He was real. He was here.

They just stayed like that for a bit before Padme realised that, while not tall, this must not be comfortable for her son.

Letting go against her own will, she held him at arm's length, just observing him for a moment before speaking,

“I am sorry for crying on you. It’s just you are so perfect.” Padme said, chuckling.

Luke's cheeks grew red as he sat in the chair, trying to hide his face.

Padme just smiled.

“You don’t have to apologise…Mom. Can I call you that?” Luke asked, his expression more hopeful than nervous.

She was going to start bawling if her children continued to be so perfect.

“I would be so so happy if you did, Luke. Thank you for giving me a chance to be your mother.” Padme replied, feeling like nothing she could say could express the amount of joy she felt right now.

Luke’s answering smile might have come close to describing it though.

“Are you feeling ok? Ben- I mean, Obi-wan said he told you what’s been going on. It must be difficult.” Luke asked, his face brimming with concern.

It should have been her job to be worried for him. She would make sure to make up for what she missed.

“I am alright, Luke. I am tougher than I look.” Padme replied, hoping to ease her son’s mind.

Luke looked at her for some time before deciding she was indeed okay.

Of course, he was force sensitive. He could probably read her better than she could read him.

Luke’s expression once again shifted to one of worry. He was nervous again. Whatever question he had he dreaded asking it.

“Did he…did he do this to you?” Luke asked, his voice quiet and reserved.

He didn’t need to tell her who he was referring to. The objective truth of course was that she didn’t know who had done this to her. But comparing both Obi-wan and her perspectives of that day’s events, she could at least assure Luke of this.

“He did hurt me, yes. Anakin wasn’t…himself then. It doesn’t excuse him but I no longer recognised who that man was. But as to if he put me in this coma, I don’t think so. I remember naming you. I remember being excited to meet you. That’s when something started taking me away.” Padme explained gently.

It must be incredibly difficult for Luke. To find his parents in such a short interval from each other, both in dangerous situations.

Speaking of Anakin though.

“Where is he, by the way? Your father? If he is still as I remember him, he would have been the first one here. Patience was never one of his strengths.” Padme asked, surprised at him not being her. Obi-wan had after all confirmed that he was here.

Luke looked at her with an expression she couldn’t quite discern.

“You love him, don’t you?” Luke asked her. But he didn’t sound angry or disappointed. Rather, he sounded hopeful.

“Your father is a complicated man, Luke. I knew that when marrying him. Neither I nor anyone else could have predicted what he would go on to do. And there is no such thing as forgiveness for what he has done. But I made the decision to stand by him if he atoned for his sins a long time ago. Not the conventional choice, but I think there is still good in him.” Padme explained her own decision.

“You don’t have to make the same choice. I will support you regardless of what you choose to do.” she added, although looking at Luke, he seemed to have made up his mind about this some time ago.

“I am glad you think so too. Leia thinks I am insane. Master Kenobi isn’t too confident. But I think there is light within him. Maybe he won’t turn into Anakin Skywalker, I have heard stories about, but I think he can be saved. To me, it feels like he’s trapped too. I don’t know why, but that's what I think.” Luke said, his voice quiet and contemplative.

Padme was beaming with pride.

“I should thank Owen and Beru for raising you so well.” she said.

But Luke flinched at that. And suddenly, she felt all the excitement drain away. What had Anakin done?

Her thoughts must have been evident because Luke offered her a sad smile.

“They were killed by the troopers stationed on Tatooine while looking for the droids that were carrying the Death Star plan. That’s the planet-killing thing, by the way. I know father is responsible for giving the order. And I don’t think I could forgive him for that or any of the rest of it. But I think loving him and wanting to save him from himself can co-exist with that.” Luke explained.

Truly, her son was wise beyond his years. Every new horrific thing Anakin did was a punch to her stomach. It wasn’t easy not to simply hate him. But she knew the whole story, and she knew him. She knew he probably regretted his crimes more than what others thought.

She hoped he would survive having to face them all.

They stayed in silence like that for a bit. Padme offered a silent thanks to Owen and Beru. They had raised Luke. And had done so with so much love and care. She would be indebted to them till the day she died.

It was Luke that broke the silence this time.

“He is here. He was injured when he got here. Then something happened when he was waking you. Master Kenobi said he was…draining his life force. I don’t understand it, but Obi-Wan managed to stop him before he got too lost and…” Luke explained, clearly still confused as to what Anakin or Obi-Wan had done. Padme wasn’t faring any better.

She would have to ask Anakin himself what kind of stupid decision he had made this time around. If he could just not do things before he even knew what he was doing, the entire galaxy would be better off.
“But he survived?” Padme asked. She wanted to confirm it.

Luke nodded in response.

“Yes. He had to be operated on, and Master Kenobi prevented him from draining away all his life force. Master mentioned he seemed weaker in the force after that. But he is improving now that he has been anesthetised for a few days. He would be out for another few days.” Luke explained his father’s current situation.

She was curious about how he had gotten hurt in the first place. That must be the blood she saw in her vision. So it really was real—all of it.

But that could wait.

“Would you mind telling me about your life, Luke? About you?” Padme asked her son. She was desperate to know him. She was desperate to know her children.

Luke didn’t hesitate before launching into his story with the most brilliant smile anyone had ever offered her.

They talked for what must have been hours. Luke had an endless amount of questions of his own, too. He was astonished at finding out she had been the queen of Naboo (“Ha, guess Leia isn’t the only royal around here anymore” Luke had said, grinning.) and even more surprised at learning that she went on to serve as Naboo’s senator.

“Wow! You are incredible, mom! Seriously. You remind me a lot of Leia, actually! You would love her.” Luke exclaimed. He was so open. So bright. But his mention of Leia reminded her of something she disagreed with Obi-Wan on. While she understood why Leia could not know about Luke, she wanted Luke to know. The least she could do for him under such turbulent conditions was tell him he had a sister.

“There is something I want you to know, Luke. I know you must be tired of surprises by now. But I think you deserve to know. Leia…She is your sister, Luke. Your twin,” Padme said gently, putting his hand on her son’s shoulder.

Luke looked stunned for a while. He was then quiet as if he was trying to see how this new piece of information needed to be processed.

Then, her son’s face lit up so fast and so brilliantly that she could have sworn he could fix the galaxy with his optimism alone.

“It makes sense. Leia and I always felt connected through the force. I didn’t understand it at first. People on the base think I am romantically interested in her. But it wasn’t that. It felt like we should have known each other from the start of our lives. Now it all makes sense.” Luke said, thinking out loud with awe.

Padme was horrified when she heard that people could ever think of the twins as a couple. She wanted to throw up at the thought. How had Obi-Wan not taken such a massive issue into consideration?!

She was now more glad than ever that she had decided to tell Luke.

She was taken out of her horrified silence by Luke’s comm beeping. He seemed just as startled as her at the sound.

They had both forgotten there was a world out there.

“Hey.” Luke said into the comm.

“Um, are you done talking to Senator- I mean your mom?” she heard someone ask.

Luke’s eyes snapped up to hers, and he mouthed the word ‘Leia’.

She was hearing her daughter’s voice!

“Yeah. I am sorry, Leia I kind of lost track of time.” Luke replied, struggling not to sound too excited.

“No, no, it's ok! It's just that Mon gave me some better clothes for her. It's just standard issue, but we figured she would be more comfortable.” Leia said.

Padme realised suddenly that she was wearing a simply beige gown. After all the brilliant dresses of her past, he hoped to have been better dressed when meeting her children.

Luke looked at her, and she nodded a yes.

“Yeah! You can come in Leia. You don’t have to hover outside the door.” Luke replied, laughing slightly.

“How did- never mind.” came the annoyed response.

“She can’t know, Luke. About any of it. Not yet.” Padme quickly told Luke.

He caught on to what she meant and just nodded sadly.

After a few minutes, the doors opened, and Leia walked in carrying a set of clothes and boots.

“Hello, Senator Amidala. It is an honour to finally meet you.” Leia said, setting the clothes down.

Luke and Obi-Wan were right. Her daughter looked so much like her.

“Hello, Leia. Obi-wan told me you are Bail and Berha’s daughter. I am sorry for your loss. I know it's inadequate, but I want you to know that. And thank you for continuing to fight. You do your world proud.” Padme said to her, sadness evident in her tone. Her daughter had lost so much. And here she was, still fighting for the galaxy—Tolerating Anakin’s presence.

Leia seemed taken aback by her statement. She sincerely hoped she had said the right words even though there was nothing she could say to Leia that would help.

“Thank you. Especially for not pitying me.” Leia replied, recovering quickly from her surprise.

Bail had trained her to be a brilliant politician.

Padme just smiled in response.

Leia hovered for a second, seemingly unsure of what to do now that the conversation had stilled. But Luke decided to save his sister from the awkward situation.

“I’ll ask the doctor to come by and give you some privacy. We’ll wait outside.” he said, standing up to stand beside Leia.

Seeing both her children together at last made her want to cry again. For Leia’s sake, she just smiled instead.

“Thank you, Luke. And you, Leia. Please tell Mon I would like to meet her soon. I intend to join the Alliance as soon as I can walk.” Padme said to the twins.

Luke smiled in response, and Leia looked surprised but happy.

“Of course. I will let her know to come by tomorrow. For now, you should rest. It's been a lot.” Leia said.

“Thank you” she said again, thanking everyone in the galaxy who had raised her children to be so amazing. So utterly perfect.

With that, the twins left to let her be.

Despite wanting to know every detail of everything that had transpired while she wasn’t awake, she was glad to have some time to herself. It was a lot to process. Her family was together but more broken than what she ever imagined possible. Anakin was still stuck under Palpatine’s influence, even if he seemed to have finally decided to walk away. The galaxy was being ruled by a sociopath and his cronies. There was a lot for her to learn. And a lot for her to do.

She heard a knock at the door and called out for who she assumed was the doctor to come in.

The door opened, and a young twi’lek walked it. Her skin was a deep-sea green, her leku swaying gently behind her. She looked strong and determined.

“Thank you doctor, for all you have done. Both for me and Vader. It must not have been easy.” Padme said by way of introduction.

The doctor hummed in response.

“No, no one here was too thrilled at Vader’s defection. But I just did my duty as a doctor.” She said, checking the various monitors that surrounded her.

Seemingly satisfied by what she saw, she moved to stand beside Padme and slowly started taking out the IVs connected to her and the various other cords she assumed were to monitor her vitals.

“I am Dr.Cullis. You did extremely well in Bacta. Thankfully, the Emperor’s lap dog had the good sense to keep you on medication needed to slow down muscle atrophy. You have lost some muscle mass, but you will recover soon. We will slowly start introducing you to solid food and create a physical therapy routine. It will take time.” she said as she finished freeing Padme from the machines.

“How long do you expect it to take?” she asked. Padme didn’t want to spend another second doing nothing.

Dr.Cullis considered her for a bit before replying.

“Moving too fast is dangerous. But the progress depends on you.” the doc replied.

“Then I would like to go as fast as I can. Time is a luxury none of us have, thanks to my husband.” She said, the last part mostly to herself. She hadn’t realised what she had just said out loud until it was too late. She then realised that they didn’t need to hide their marriage any more. But she would probably get more questioning and disapproving looks now than when Anakin was a Jedi Knight.

If the doctor was surprised or disapproving of the fact, she didn’t show it. For that, Padme was grateful.

But the doctor nodded nonetheless.

“I understand. I will create an accelerated rehabilitation program then.” Dr.Cullis said. This must not be a new request on the base then.

Padme nodded and offered her thanks. There was a lot for her to do. And she would like to be caught up with everything going on in the galaxy before she met Anakin. That meeting would take up a considerable amount of her energy.

Chapter Text

Leia now understood why Naboo had been so obsessed with the Senator. She was the perfect leader. Compassionate but decisive. Kind but not naive. The few reports of her that had survived in the holonet did not do the woman justice.

Leia had watched as Padme started her rehabilitation process with the ferocity she didn’t imagine someone who had been unconscious for 20 years to regain so quickly. By the fourth day, she was walking on her own. A little unsteady at times, but in less than a week, she had become an active member of the alliance.

Mon and Padme were clearly old friends. Being one of Palpatine’s original critics, Mon offered her the choice to serve on the high command. And Padme had accepted it gracefully. She had then requested Leia to get her any and all information regarding everything that had happened in the last 20 years.

A gargantuan request. But one she was happy to oblige. She had been going through many old documents anyway since Vader’s defection. She didn’t see the harm in allowing their newest leader access to the same.

And Padme used it exhaustively. Between her treatment and the time she spent in her room, desk holding row after row of datapads (chronologically, she was told when she went to check on the Senator once.), Leia wondered how she was coping with the exhaustion. Nothing was too mundane for her. From senate transcripts to Imperial logs, she consumed any and all information Leia could get her. After a few meetings with the high command, Padme had somehow grasped 20 years' worth of politics and war in a week.

Leia wondered what she must have been like in her youth. Not that she wasn’t determined now. While Padme was on par with the high command in terms of information now, she was not bogged down with the weariness and caution that had seeped into the high command members over the many years they had spent fighting this war. Leia herself often found it an inconvenience. She respected them all immensely, but they needed to do something. It was time to start fighting.

Leia hoped the sudden appearance of Padme would be the catalyst that they all needed.

After Padme seemed satisfied with her understanding of the galaxy, she started researching Vader.

Suddenly, Leia could see that perhaps it wasn’t just Luke who was now hoping to ‘save’ Vader.

“How can you still see him as your husband?” Leia asked.

She had come to Padme’s room to drop off the files she had requested on Vader. A long list of atrocities is essential.

Padme looked at her for some time before answering.

“I am not saying there are any explanations or excuses for what he has done. Neither will there ever be any real forgiveness from the galaxy. And the only thing I can forgive him for is all I have forgiven him for. But I intend to stay with him and help him atone. There is…a lot more to his story, Leia. One that both I and Kenobi know. And we both think there is a chance for him to return. Perhaps not as the Hero with no fear; I doubt he would take kindly to that title. He always complained of it during the Clone Wars. But Vader and Anakin aren’t as mutually exclusive as the Jedi believe.” Padme replied.

Leia hadn’t realised how insufferable she must have sounded like to others when she truly believed in something until she met Padme.

She wasn’t just a fool blindly in love with a monster. She seemed to understand Vader (rather, Anakin, as Padme insisted.) well. Know why he is who he is. And both Luke and her were determined to lead or, if needed, drag Vader back to the right side of this fight.

Leia let the topic go. She had resigned to do the same with Luke as well. If mother and son were so hell-bent on saving Vader, perhaps they could. Vader’s behaviour had been erratic at best recently so she didn’t put anything past the dark lord at this point.

“Alright. For the record, it's you and Luke who I trust. Not Vader.” Leia said, setting down the datapads she was carrying.

“Thank you, Leia. Both for all the help you have given and the vote of confidence.” Padme replied, smiling at her yet again with those curiously sad eyes. Her face and voice betrayed nothing more than friendly affection. But Padme’s eyes always looked sad when she looked at Leia.

And Leia couldn’t quite understand why. Of everyone on base, with the exception of Luke, Han, Obi-wan and Mon, Padme was the only person who didn’t treat Leia like she was made of glass. So why did the Senator look so utterly devastated every time she looked at Leia?

Then Leia suddenly remembered the other reason she was here. How could she have forgotten this?

“Vader has been off all his meds for a few hours now, by the way. He should be awake as soon as they wear off.” Leia said, knowing Padme had been waiting for this.

The sadness in her eyes disappeared suddenly and was replaced with a kind of determination Leia had never seen before.

“Right. I am going then.” Padme declared, suddenly getting up.

“What now? He probably wouldn’t be awake for hours.” Leia said, startled at the sudden shift in energy.

Padme laughed with more fondness than what Leia thought appropriate for any conversation related to Vader before replying.

“He was never a big fan of med bays. He would be gone the second he could walk.” Padme said, a small smile on her face as they walked down to the Med Bay,

Leia had decided at some point to follow her despite having no interest in seeing the man.

At the med bay, they were on their way to where Vader was supposed to be and instead were met by an irritated-looking Dr.Cullis. She spotted them and immediately stormed towards them. Leia didn’t have to guess who her source of irritation was.

“He’s gone, isn’t he?” Padme asked as the doc reached them.

“We didn’t even know when his demonic lordship left. He took his IV and disappeared to god knows where.” the doc replied, exasperated at having her authority so openly defied.

“Should he be here any longer for any medical reasons?” Padme questioned, sighing.

“No. And tell Vader not to bother coming back if he has no intention of staying alive. I have patients who don’t have a death wish to care for.” Dr.Cullis said, walking away.

“I’ll let him know.” Padme replied, sounding tired, before turning to Leia.

“Any idea as to where he could have gone? I assume he intends to stay on base?” She asked.

“That is what he last said. He said he’ll stay on his ship. So perhaps there?” Leia guessed. Who knows what the maniac is going to do next? Since the alarms in the base hadn’t started going off, she assumed he was still an ally.

“Would you mind telling me where it is? I don’t want to keep you away from your duties any longer.” Padme offered, likely wanting to spare Leia from having to meet her deranged husband.

“I am coming with you. I know you trust him. I, however, don’t. Follow me.” Leia replied, turning the offer down. Leia guessed Vader wouldn’t harm her, considering the extent to which he had gone to save her. But he was known to be homicidal, more often than not, rather than kind.

Padme seemed to see her resolve and just followed her as she led them to the hangar. As soon as they were within earshot of the hanger, she knew they had found him. The usual hustle and bustle of the hanger was gone.

Her hunch was proven right as they entered the hanger and saw Vader going up the ramp of his ship.

Truth be told, Leia had thought his ship would be defaced beyond recognition by now. But to her surprise, the fear Vader spread, even when asleep, was enough of a deterrent to the troops.

They quickened their pace to catch him before he closed the ramp.

“Not betraying us, I hope, Lord Vader,” Leia called out when they were within talking distance. He was already inside the ship and by either bravery or stupidity, Leia walked up the ramp to follow him, tailed by Padme.

“I am not exactly on the Emporer’s guest list at the moment, Princess Organa.” came the scathing reply. He hadn’t turned to look at them yet, clearly not expecting to be ambushed quite so soon after his release.

Leia was about to tell him he wasn’t precisely on theirs either as he turned around to face them, but the sudden look of panic that washed over Vader’s face left her momentarily dumbstruck.

The mere idea of Vader panicking was too absurd to consider. But here he was, staring at the woman behind her, petrified.

He looked at her like she was some ghost that would disappear if he said or did the wrong thing. Like was terrified this was somekind of nightmare he was stuck in.

Leia didn’t get to offer any snarky remarks regarding the dark lord’s stupified expression, though, as she watched Padme pass by her like a fast shadow and punch Vader across the face. The ship rank with a disturbing crack on impact, and the next second, she was staring at Vader on the floor, still seemingly petrified.

It took Leia what felt like an eternity to process what had just happened. She had expected acts of violence from Vader. Not Padme.

She didn’t stay to find out how Vader reacted as she turned around and started following Padme, who had already almost made it to the hangar doors.

As she ran slightly to catch up with her, she called out to make Padme wait.

“Wait, wait, hold on. I thought you said you forgive him for…whatever he did to you.” Leia asked as she fell into step with Padme.

“Forgiving him and slapping him across the face are not mutually exclusive. Hopefully, it snapped him back to reality.” Padme replied, sounding oddly satisfied with herself.

“That might have been more than just a slap. Not that I am complaining, but that definitely was a lot more than just a slap, and it was incredible.” Leia replied, now slightly in awe of her. Clearly, Leia had misjudged Padme and Vader’s relationship. They were equals in almost every way. Leia suspected Padme, in fact, likely had a much stronger hold on Vader than anyone on the base realised, perhaps with the exception of Kenobi.

Padme grimaced a little.

“I didn’t expect it to be so strong. Perhaps I did go a little overboard.” She said, the slight concern colouring her voice evident despite her light tone.

Leia scoffed.

“He deserved a lot more than that. He’s lucky no one has killed him yet.” Leia mumbled. It was true. Now that the Sith lord was actually walking around amongst the troops, she expected them to try every way possible to cut his life short.

The concern was that he would have a higher success rate retaliating against the troops.

Unlike the Empire, they didn’t have idiots in uniforms to spare.

Padme just chuckled at that. She, too, knew the odds of Vader being killed were low.

“When do you think Mon will call for a meeting with him? It's about time we started analysing whatever information he said he had.” Padme said, suddenly back to business.

It was true. Vader has promised them information and they were on borrowed time as it is. With Vader and Piett no longer actively hiding them, the Empire would find them soon enough.

“Soon, if I had to guess. We should let her know Vader is up and about already.” Leia replied, starting to walk towards the situation room where Mon usually was.

They had to hope Vader really was on their side.

Chapter Text

Vader was in some kind of fog. He remembered being in the void with his angel. He remembered saving her, being irritated at Kenobi’s unwelcome intrusion and then nothing.

He remained in that nothingness for force knows how long. Now, he was stuck in this suffocating fog. He couldn’t reach out with the force very well. This felt similar to what he felt like when waking up from sleeping recently. But this felt even worse. He really felt trapped here. Before he could think more, his drifted off again.

Now, he was no longer in that fog. But he was starting to wish he was.

He was on Mustafar. The familiar volcanic landscape almost soothing him. He looked around and recognised the place. He was possibly the only person in the galaxy who had been on Mustafar long enough to recognise the landscape but sight.

But this particular bank was one he would recognise with his eyes closed.

It was the place near the old separatist building where he almost choked his wife and child to death.

Relief flooded him as he remembered how brightly her life force had shone in that void he had met her in. She had survived. He succeeded.

Walking forward, getting closer and closer to that horrible place, he realised Padme was there. For a second, he panicked; this wasn’t the first time he had replayed that horrendous day in his mind. It had haunted him every time he closed his eyes alongside his other atrocities daily before he stopped sleeping.

But he knew she was okay now. She was healthy and awake. He wouldn’t hurt her this time.

As he got closer, he could see her more clearly now. She looked as she had in the void—the same as he remembered but also different.

Now, no longer shocked by his own success, he wanted to talk to her. To tell her he was so so sorry for everything he had done. He wanted to get on his knees and apologise for the rest of his remaining lifespan if it meant she would not hate him.

He was barely a few feet from her now; she really was here.

Then he saw her standing there, against her ship, just like she had 20 years ago.

Suddenly, his feet stopped.

Do you trust yourself? That persistent and irritating voice at the back of his mind asked.

Could you not hurt her? Can you ensure it? It purred, clearly realising it had found its target.

Could he?

A part of him scoffed. Of course, he could. He had burned down the entire universe to keep her safe.

But it wasn’t the universe that hurt her, was it? The less sure part of him whispered, fear evident.

“Back to actually finish the job this time?” he heard a voice say.

His head snapped towards it, and he was met with Padme’s pleading eyes. He had expected anger. Hate. But this was worse. She wasn’t looking at him as if she was angry at him for what he had done. She was looking at him as he would inevitably do it again.

And so you probably would. The voice rang clear and loud in his head.

“No! Padme, please, I-...I did not want to…” he started to protest, but it died in his throat. What could he say? There was nothing he could ever say or do that would right the wrongs he had done. To her. To their family. To the galaxy. There was nothing to be done.

“Once you turned your anger on me, would you also turn on Luke?” Padme asked, the same pained tone cutting into him like knives.

“I would never hurt our child.” he replied, his voice more desperate than steady. He would never do that.

“You once promised the same to me.” Padme replied, her tone now shifting to resignation.

He wanted to move closer and tell her it was the worst mistake of his life to raise his hand against her and their unborn child and that he would do anything, anything, for a chance at atoning for it.

But the second he moved closer to her, his ears burned with her screams.

Invisible flames were licking her. Burning her alive. She seemed to get more and more burnt the closer he got.

“Please! Anakin, Stay away!.” She yelled desperately, now on the floor as the flames consumed her flesh.

“Just. I-...I can stop this, please, Padme. I can help you.” he desperately replied, now rooted to the floor with fear. Any step he took towards he was hurting her. His mind quickly turned to the only emotion it felt now - Anger. He wanted to rip the planet to shreds. Destroy it so it would stop haunting him.

“LIAR” Padme screamed with a kind of feral rage that looked foreign on her. Her eyes burned the same sickly yellow his has been for so long,

And will continue to be. The same voice reminded him.

He felt his mind start to scuttle around, trying to find a solution. But suddenly, he found that he couldn’t move. Damn this body!

He was just stuck there as his angel burned like he once had. He could feel the pain himself. The smell of burning flesh and clothes filled his lungs. Suddenly, he could feel his own airway being restricted. Every gasping breath burned. Everything seemed to be burning now.

The panic that flooded him left him suddenly empty. He couldn’t think what to do. All he could think was what was. And what was happening right now is that he was hurting Padme. He was hurting her by merely existing. He wanted to walk away. To make this all stop! To help her! To sav-

Suddenly he was staring at the bright lights of a strange room he did not recognise.

He was still shaking, reeling from whatever that was. He couldn’t tell if it was just a nightmare or some kind of sadistic warning from the force.

Just as suddenly as he woke, all of a sudden, the presence of 100s of beings hit him. His mind buzzed with the emotion and thought of so many people around him. He wanted to scream. He wanted to split his head open and let the screams out to make it all stop.

Slowly, his memories crashed through his mind. Each one making his panic only rise. Until he finally felt it. Padme was here. Her presence shone blindingly bright. Only being eclipsed in its intensity in the force by a similar presence. Luke, Vader realised.

He was breathing desperately now. He hasn’t felt this out of breath in years. It felt like the flames in the dream had actually burned his lungs.

He sat up and looked around. It looked similar enough to the room Padme was in for him to tell he was still on Hoth. For whatever reason, the rebels had kept him alive.

He still had some IV hooked up to his neck. Not wanting to spend any more time unconscious in a place full of hostels, he carefully took it out, suddenly grateful for his years of experience dealing with these things when he was in that horrid suit.

Ensuring he wasn’t yet again going to bleed to death, we swung his legs over and stood.

What remained of his flesh and bones felt like they had pins and needles in him. A feeling he was unfortunately intimately familiar with.

Unsteady, he left the room and sought out the hanger through the force. It wasn’t difficult, but he was getting a severe headache from all the people around him now. Finding the shortest route and not caring who saw him, he beelined for his ship. He needed some time to meditate. To immerse himself back in the force. Whatever they used to keep him unconscious for force knows how long had really left him open to the complete assault of the force. He hadn’t felt other beings to this degree since he was a padawan.

The further he made it through the base, the more eyes turned to him. Of course, he has no idea where his robe went. He was still in the bloody uniform. It was a small relief that the rebels had left his jacket in the room, so at least he wasn’t walking around in a blood-soaked shirt.

Not that the jacket was in much better condition.

His face was visible now. The risk of someone recognising him as Anakin Skywalker was low but not non-existent. He would need to get his other robe before any more endeavours through the base. He had grown considerably older, and the scars and burns that remained should at least make anyone who would have been around long enough to remember him doubt their own conclusions.

But he predicted he would eventually run out of that luck. But it was a separate problem for another time.

By the time he got to the hanger, his headache, which had been steadily growing, was now threatening to split open. He could hear every thought, feeling and action happening around him. Deciding it was better to shut himself out from the force for the time being, he built up his mental walls and retreated from the force.

This by no means a pleasant experience. The sudden sensation of the force leaving him, even if it was momentarily, was akin to losing a limb. Vader didn’t have any more of those to spare.

But at least he was the only one speaking in his own head now. All the screams of terror, anger, spite and need for revenge were too much right now. It would give him strength once he fortified his shields, but they were a nuisance right now.

He walked through the hangar silently. Even without the force, he was acutely aware of the fact that every being in there had frozen at his entry. They were all watching him. Waiting for some kind of rampage to be sure.

As he got closer to his ship, he was glad to find it intact. Perhaps his reputation had been enough to ensure it wasn’t defaced—a small relief.

He had nearly made it up the ramp to his shuttle and relative peace before he heard a voice call from behind him.

“Not betraying us I hope, Lord Vader” Princess Organa’s voice called out. Of all the people that had to find him here, she was probably the worst.

Well, almost the worst.

“I am not exactly on the Emporer’s guest list at the moment, Princess Organa.” he spat back. He could see the door to his private room now. He wanted nothing more than to ignore her and shut the door.

But he had a feeling she wouldn’t be as merciful as that.

He turned around to tell her to find someone else to torture with her presence but froze.

The princess wasn’t alone.

And of all the people to accompany her, it was the one person he both longed to and dreaded to see.

Padme.

She looked so alive. So real. A part of him was eager to think this was still some kind of bizarre vision. And no sooner than that thought had emerged, the memory of his most recent nightmare surfaced,

Suddenly, his disbelief morphed into fear and panic. He wanted to turn around and hide in his quarters, no matter how childish that was. The more time he spent looking at her face, the more it seemed to burn in front of his eyes; her eyes seemed to glow that same unnatural amber colour he had seen in his nightmare.

He could feel his throat constricting, his heart rate climbing alarmingly fast. If his limbs were still flesh, he would have collapsed to the floor, shaking and sobbing.

For the first time in a long time, Vader was overcome with the long-forgotten feeling of a panic attack.
He got no chance to make a complete fool out of himself, though, as Padme seemed to charge forward at him with impossible speed. Before he even comprehended that fact, he felt something make contact with his face, heard a loud crack in his head and found himself on the floor of his ship, his mouth now tasting of iron.

What just happened?

Had Padme just…punched him? He deserved it, of course, but the shock of the action was still refusing to wear off, and he was still stuck on the floor, gaping at his wife.

Suddenly, any doubt he had of her being some visage his mind had conjured up to torture him disappeared. She was real. She was here. She was alive.

His panic was now threatening to turn into a full-on breakdown.

Padme walked out of his ship seconds after she punched him, and the princess had also followed suit at some point.

Not caring what anyone outside the hangar, who had no doubt heard the thud from him falling over and were now cautiously trying to catch a glimpse of what was going on inside from as far away as they could, might think, he got to his feet and without even bothering to close the ramp, practically ran into his quarter and bolted the door shut.

The second the door closed behind him, he slid down to the floor, put his head in his hands and wept.

He wasn’t sure why he was crying. He was surprised he was still capable of such emotions. His heart was racing so fast he was positive he would have a cardiac arrest if this didn’t stop. He could hear muffled sobbing, but he wasn’t sure the cries were his. It all felt both extremely real and entirely surreal.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed on the floor or how much he wept, but at some point, he ran out of tears, and his voice felt too sore to use anymore.

He was broken out of the spell of his own misery by the comm beeping to indicate a message being left. Realising he neither had the time nor was in the place to deal with his own breakdown, he opened it to see a request to attend a High command meeting.

Clearly, the princess had let them know of his awakening.

He got up to leave before realising he was still dressed in his bloody uniform and probably looked insane.

He would never consider himself vain, but after ten years inside that walking coffin, he learned to appreciate the simple things in life.

After relieving himself and scrubbing himself until all the dried blood was gone, he finally felt clean. He would never take being able to shower for granted after his time in the suit.

He decided to forgo the uniform and instead opted to wear a simple black shirt, pants and boots. He also pulled on his black robe since the rebels insisted on staying on the most uninhabitable of planets.

He went to the small mirror in the corner to make his barely dry hair presentable and was already in the process of zoning out so as not to look at his own face. He couldn’t stand to see Skywalker’s face anymore. He knew from what the medics told him that besides the plethora of burn scars and other scars left all across his body and face, he more or less looked the same as he did before Mustafar.

But suddenly, he found himself staring into the mirror dumbfounded.

His eyes were no longer the sith yellow they should have been. Rather now, Skywalker’s blue eye seemed to invade his eyes outwards from the pupil, leaving a burning ring of the more familiar yellow at the edge of his irises.

He barely registered how bloodshot his eyes were or the fact that he seemed to look closer to how pale he was right out of the suit than what he previously remembered.

What did this mean? Was his connection to the dark side weaker now? All his research over the years did not indicate that using the light side somehow weakened your connection to the dark side. At least not for the short duration he had used it. Had the intensity of the power he had used caused some kind of change?

He didn’t get much more time to keep wondering about any of that as the comm started beeping again. The rebels were clearly growing impatient.

He had made up his mind at some point. He couldn’t avoid all beings on the rebel base. That just wasn’t logical. But the dream had clearly only confirmed his own fears. He was a danger to Padme. His own family. So until he learned not to give in to his anger as quickly as he was used to, he was going to stay as far away from Padme and Luke as possible.

Just thinking about it made him miserable and angry, only confirming his fears. He had done all this to save his family and now couldn’t even spend time with them. He didn’t know his son how he had grown up, what he liked to do. Padme likely hated him. He had long since given up on hoping to have any sort of relationship with her.

But there was a relief in knowing that they were here. He had built up all his shields in the last; however long he had been here, he could now sense both their presence like beacons in the force.

He would take comfort in that.

Dragging his eyes away from his now unfamiliar face, he quickly dragged his hand through his barely dry hair until it had some semblance of decency and pulled up his hood. The high command likely already knew his face and had members old enough to recognise him as Anakin Skywalker even after all this time. But he had no intention of letting the rest of the rebels see his face anymore. Most were probably too young to recognise him. Sidious had done an excellent job of purging all evidence of Skywalker’s existence from the galaxy after all. But he valued his privacy too much to take that chance.

A part of him also did not want anyone to see his eyes, which were so clearly irritated. No conclusion anyone would draw from that was something he wanted to deal with.

He allowed himself a moment to clear his throat and compose himself. This meeting was going to eat up every shred of patience he had.

Chapter Text

As he left his private quarters on his ship, he quickly realised he didn’t actually know where the meeting was being held. He didn’t have to wonder for long as he saw the princess standing outside the ramp, her expression of discontent reminding him strangely of himself.

He closed the ramp, not acknowledging her. Whatever he said would be undermined by the fact that she had just seen him get punched in the face, by Padme.

As the ramp closed, the princess spoke.

“The high command already knows of your identity. Don’t you think the theatrics are a bit much?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

He was starting to think that the Organas had raised her to test his patience.

“I simply value my privacy, your highness.” he replied, and before she could reply with another one of her irritatingly accurate observations, he changed the topic away from himself.

“I presume you are here to lead me to this meeting? I need to collect the droid I arrived with from Piett’s possession if so.” he said, forcing them to stay on topic.

“The mouse droid?” the princess asked, walking ahead of him.

“Yes.” he replied.

“That explains a lot. And drop the title, Vader; last I checked, you were a witness to the destruction of my home. There is no planet for me to represent anymore, thanks to your empire.” the girl replied, her tone clearly intending to make him lose his temper.

He didn’t miss the slight about the Death Star either. He had no hand in the creation of the abomination or the decision to test the damned thing. But he supposed it was confirmed that he hadn’t particularly acted on his disapproval when the idiot Tarkin decided to blow up an entire planet.

He figured the semantics mattered very little to any Alderaanian, so he focused only on the part of the conversation that wasn’t rhetorical.

“What would you prefer me to address you as?” he asked, his patience waning as they walked through the many corridors of the base to what seemed like a row of personnel quarters.

He suddenly realised that he did not know her first name despite having met the girl at many of Palpatine’s irritating events. Right now, she likely knew more about him than he did about her. This did nothing to improve his already foul mood.

“Organa will do fine. And we are here. Piett himself is already at the meeting. But I reckon the droid is with his family.” Organa said, stopping in front of a set of doors.

He waited as she knocked on the door and waited for someone to open them. Soon enough, they were greeted by Mrs.Piett. Any joy that had been on her face at seeing Organa morphed into fear the instant her eyes landed on him.

“Leia! And um…Vader. What brings you here?” the woman asked, moving to stand, covering the doorway as if trying to shield her children from his mere presence. Good. He had avoided children like the plague since…that day. And most beings - young or old - had the good sense to stay as far away from him as possible.

“I apologise for the intrusion, but we need to retrieve the mouse droid in your possession.” Leia replied apologeticly.

He didn’t think he needed people to start apologising for his presence on the base at the start of every conversation. He doubted he was the first questionable ally the alliance had had over the years.

“Oh. The Droid? Sure…” Mrs.Piett replied, sounding mildly surprised at the seemingly innocuous reason for their visit.

She disappeared inside briefly before returning with Emdee and the Piett children. Clearly, letting the children get attached to the droid was an oversight on his part.

When Emdee saw him, he made an embarrassingly' loud declaration of relief before zooming around his legs like an over-excited tooka, all the while warbling away in binary.

>Why did you disappear for so long? Did you require maintenance?< Emdee asked.

“I am fine. Stop that before I disassemble your wheels.” He replied, more tired than angry. He was used to Emdee’s personality by now.

If anyone present had any questions, they had the good sense not to ask them.

“Thank you, Mrs. Piett, for looking after the droid.” He replied curtly, wanting this encounter to end as soon as possible. The woman nodded, but Vader heard a tiny voice ask him something before they could take their leave.

“You won't actually hurt him, will you?” the younger Piett boy asked, this time merely clinging to his mother’s hand as opposed to hiding.

What in the galaxy had possessed the child to ask him anything at all, he did not know. But the boy’s intentions were purely innocent. That he could sense from the force, he could also sense less fear and the same mild curiosity that seemed to be a family trait in the boy’s force presence.

“No. I will not.” he replied before processing the words he was saying.

Emdee beeped an affirmative. He seriously needed to program fear into the damn droid.

The boy regarded him momentarily before nodding and running inside to the safety of his new home.

“We shall let you be now, Elira. Thank you for your time.” Leia replied quickly, clearly wanting the awkward conversation to end as well.

As Mrs Piett, Elira, he now assumed, closed the door, he realised he had just caught Organa’s first name as well.

“Your name is Leia?” He asked.

“You didn’t know what the name of the prisoner you had was?” Organa asked, her tone curious.

“I do not make it a habit of creating acquaintances. Especially ones actively working against me. I rarely have any use for them.” He replied.

“You seem fond of the droid.” Organa said as she failed to hide her amusement and started leading them to the meeting.

Emdee beeped in confirmation as he followed Organa.

“You are testing the extent of my tolerance, Emdee” he mumbled as he followed the unlikely pair to the absolute nightmare of a meeting that awaited him.

—------------------------------

However bad he thought the meeting would be, it was made infinitely worse by the presence of two of the last people he wanted to meet in the galaxy for vastly different reasons, growing stronger and stronger by the minute.

By the time Organa was swiping her keycard to open the door, he was considering the merits of just leaving and hiding out on some backwater planet until his head stopped hurting. The force, of course, gave him no such reprieve as he heard the doors hiss open.

Resigning himself to this path he had carved out for himself, he strode in and came to a stop at the head of the table. Organa had already taken her seat, and Emdee was anxiously rolling back and forth.

He spotted Kenobi to his left and barely recognised the man due to his force signature. If Vader had thought he had aged more than he should have, Kenobi looked positively ancient. The rage that rose within him made the room colder than it already was, and he was imagining the many ways he could kill his old master, along with his most recent one, before he realised the looks of alarm that were spreading across the room and reigned his anger back.

By now, the worst of his anger was a well-trained bloodhound on a leash—most of the time, at least.

But it wasn’t particularly difficult to forget his hatred for Kenobi, however, as he saw Padme sitting to his right.

She was the most beautiful being in the galaxy and would remain so for the rest of time. She looked so right sitting there in the middle of a war room. His hopes were briefly renewed as she didn’t seem to look at him with absolute disgust, but a reminder of the dream quickly stamped it out.

For her sake, he should stay as far away as possible.

Beyond them, he only recognised Mothma and Organa. There were two middle-aged men, one older man and a Mon Calamari.

Apparently, after deciding he wasn’t going to be the one starting this conversation, the chancellor spoke.

“Please, take a seat, Vader. We have much to discuss. There are news of probe droids being sent to systems close to us. It is only a matter of days before they reach it.” Mothma said, geasteruring to the chair at the opposite end of the table from her.

As he took his seat, he couldn’t shake the feeling that despite being at one head of the table, this was very much an interrogation.

He floated Emdee onto the table as he chirped with curiosity.

“The discs, Emdee.” He said, and the Emdee replied in understanding and popped open the sacred compartment where he had stashed seven discs chock-full of information. It would take the alliance weeks to understand it all. But he could make things easier.

He floated the discs to her and waited for her to take them. To her credit, there was no hesitation on her part while quickly snatching them out of the air and handing them over to another rebel soldier who took them to who he assumed was an analyst who swept out the room.

“They contain everything I could get without raising immediate suspicion. About routine cargo carriers you can attack to the plans for the new death star.” Vader explained, knowing damn well that he had just unleashed a beast that would rampage the ranks of the rebels.

“Another Death Star?” Padme asked, her alarm and discontent slapping him in the face.

He struggled to keep his voice even as he focused on the question as opposed to the owner of the voice.

“It is worse. It was redesigned to be more energy efficient and would take only around three minutes for the superlasers to recharge. Furthermore, the Superlaser MK II has two of its hypermatter reactors as its power supply. There is also no longer a single large exhaust port to target. It is better armed and has the capacity to focus on smaller targets than a planet.” Vader explained.

To say that the atmosphere in the room soured would be a severe understatement.

“When was this commissioned?” Mothma asked.

He couldn’t help but grimace under the hood. He was hoping this particular unfortunate question wouldn’t be discussed.

“Mere weeks before you destroyed the first one. The Emperor wanted the obvious weaknesses of the first one remedied. I can’t say he expected the first one to be destroyed so quickly. But he did not intend for the first one to be the only one.” He replied, hoping his ending note would make it easier for the alliance to deal with the news.

“Leave it to that monster to make himself more evil with every new revelation.” one of the members he did not know remarked. Not an entirely inaccurate assessment.

“You are?” he asked, not intending it to sound as harsh as it did.

“I am General Madine. I don’t expect you to know my work with the Empire.” Madine replied, making his displeasure clear.

“This here is General Dadoona, this General Reeikan and this, Admiral Ackbar.” Mothma added, pointing to the other three in the room he did not recognise.

He turned to Piett asking the question that was relevant to them.

Taking the cue, he replied.

“General Madine and Dadoona both served the Republic and later the Empire. General Reeikan is a survivor of the Alderaanian Genocide and -” Piett clarified, but Vader cut him off before he could end his introductions.

“You are Gail Ackbar.” Vader said, looking at the Mon Calamari Admiral, that he had now recognised from his past.

“I am glad to know you still remember me, General Skywalker. It has indeed been a long time.” Ackbar responded.

He let his hood fall away before meeting the Admiral’s eyes.

“Whatever memory you have of the naive idealist you met on Mon Cala will not serve you well, Admiral.” He replied, his tone switching from controlled neutrality to open discontent. He was uncomfortable enough with Padme, Kenobi and Mothma being familiar with his younger self. He did not appreciate adding yet another name to that list.

He swept his eyes across the others around the table, carefully avoiding Padme. No one else seemed surprised. If Piett recognised his past self’s name, he did not show it.

“Who else knows?” He asked Mothma.

“Everyone. It was either that or let you get killed on arrival. Didn’t you find it unusual that you and your property have been left undisturbed. I am sure many were kept in line by the threat of your retaliation. But we risked mass defection if we did not at least offer some possible redeeming fact about your past. Skywalker was content with the decision so was Padme. I presume this does not violate our deal?” she offered by way of explanation as if that would somehow make this news better. He had anticipated this. But that didn’t mean he liked it.

“No. But I have no interest in going by that name. Perhaps it is for the best since Palpatine will undoubtedly have already put bounties on my head under both my names.” He replied, leaning back in his chair. He wasn’t going to be childish about this.

“Indeed. The current price on your head is a billion credits. Alive” Kenobi responded to his last statement.

Scowling at the man, he settled on simply discussing the topic.

“Alive. Interesting.” he replied, quieter than he intended. He doubted his master had any illusions of convincing Vader to join him again. He must want Vader to die by his own hand.

“Any idea as to why he wants you alive?” Organa asked.

He scoffed in response.

“After I lobbed his hand off? I doubt he wants a reunion. He just wants to have the satisfaction of using me till the end.” Vader replied, unable to keep the macabre amusement out of his voice.

“Why did you serve a master who has no regard for you?: Organa questioned, her anger and confusion evident in her tone.

He couldn’t help but chuckle at that. So naive. And so hypocritical.

“Am I not serving the alliance now?” he questioned instead of answering.

“We are not your masters, Vader.” Kenobi had the audacity to say, his tone containing pity, that he could not stand.

He snarled and resisted the want to rip the man’s head off his shoulders.

“That's ironic coming from the man I called master for over a decade. No? Tell yourself whatever you want to preserve your delusions of standing on a moral high ground. But do not attempt to tell me what is and what is not servitude.” He snapped back.

The Jedi had just taken his chains from Watto and leashed him for as long as they wanted. He had then taken those chains and handed them straight to Sidious. Now, here he was, having yet again passed his leash to a new master.

But this time, his new master wouldn’t be threatening his family. Both Luke and Padme mattered too much to the alliance. He was confident in that.

“Perhaps we can move on to more productive discussions?” Reeikan cut in, ending the awkward silence that met his response.

“I hear from Leia that you did not wait to meet with your medic before taking your leave.” Mon said, directing the conversation to the schedule she was clearly trying to follow.

“Forego the show of solidarity, Chancellor. I am well aware of my many medical issues. If this is about the arrhythmia, I assure you I will stay alive long enough to serve your interests.” Vader responded, not particularly eager to discuss his medical file.

“Very well. We will use the time we have left here analysing the information you have given us. Our scouts are looking for any imperial activity within the system. We will leave without bloodshed if possible.” Mothma replied, effectively putting an end to this conversation.

“I doubt it. The empire will want a victory. I recommend preparing your troops.” Vader replied. Whatever illusions the Rebels had of preventing causalities were not shared with the Empire.

“Understood.” Mothma replied, standing up.

He pulled his hood back on and left before anyone, more specifically Padme, could stop him.

He doubted he could avoid his wife and son for very long. He dreaded that inevitable encounter more than he his inevitable battle with Sidious. At least with Sidious, he would not have to deal with the painful rejection and anger that was sure to come from his family.