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Chapter Text

Prologue

Mulder stared at the box in front of him. Part of him couldn’t believe it existed and another part of him was surprised he hadn’t considered it before. When The Lone Gunmen had called and said that they had a lead that he should follow, he hadn’t expected this. They had spent the night breaking and entering into a government facility. Mulder had chosen to go along with the boys because he had nothing better to do. It was the day before Christmas Eve and Scully was away with her family for several days - living it up at a beach house on the sunny West Coast, while he was spending the last few days of the millennium alone.. He hadn’t actually expected to have anything come of the heist - it was just a way to spend a lonely Thursday night. And now he had unwittingly - at first anyway - opened Pandora’s Box. He had a lot of information he wasn’t quite sure how to process. He knew he had to tell Scully but wasn’t sure how. Especially not now, not after he… oh shit, what had he done?

****

78 hours earlier

“See, Mulder, we told you it was worth coming with us,” Byers said as they unpacked the van of all their equipment.

“Just because the box says ‘X-Files Surveillance’ doesn’t mean it actually contains anything interesting or helpful,” Mulder countered.

But in reality he was desperate to get home and start sorting through his bounty. Maybe this time there would be something tangible for him to hold on to, to follow, to get concrete answers and proof. A way to get justice for Samantha. And Scully. And himself. This box could just lead him to salvation.

“Sure, sure,” Frohike mumbled, attempting to carry a box that was bigger than he was. “You just don’t like admitting when we’re right and you’re wrong.”

“I mean, it just seemed a little bit too easy,” Mulder replied, trying not to laugh at the image of a box walking with squat little legs into his friends’ den.

“Easy!” Langly exclaimed, dropping the length of cable he was coiling and whirling to face Mulder. “Do you have any idea how long it took us to track, hack, and infiltrate this facility? As usual, you waltz in at the end of the story and act like the hero when it was us who did all the work! And are you grateful? No! Sometimes I don’t know why we bother…”

“Woah! Settle down there, Ringo,” Mulder said, holding his hands up in defence. “I never asked you to do this. *You* asked *me* to come along for this ride, boys.”

“Yeah, calm your farm there, hippy boy,” Frohike said, returning to stand next to Mulder.

“Why doesn’t everybody just take a breath?” Byers suggested, in his ever-present rational tone. “It’s been a long night for everyone.”

“It’s been a long night for him,” Langly said, using his chin to point at Mulder. “It’s been a long three weeks for us.”

“You’ve been looking into this for three weeks?” Mulder asked, stunned.

“Actually, we’ve been looking into it for several months. The last three weeks were focused on learning about the facility and finding a way to hack it,” Byers told him.

Mulder stared at the three men in confusion. “But, why?” he asked, eventually.

“What do you mean ‘why’?” asked Frohike.

“See, this is what I mean! You don’t even realise how invested we are in your work, Mulder. In you,” Langly said.

“And in the delightful Agent Scully,” Frohike added, waggling his eyebrows for good measure.

“Mulder, we want you to triumph over these forces. We want you to take down the men behind the government and shine a light on them. We are always helping you, even when you don’t know it,” Byers explained.

“I… I didn’t realise. I’m sorry, boys. Thanks. I guess I just, I’m used to having things like this dangled in front of me and then ripped away. I’m trying not to invest too much in chances of proof or vindication until I confirm that’s what they are. That it’s not just another breadcrumb to lead me down a false trail and end up exactly where They want me to be. I’m sick of being a pawn and a puppet. And I guess I was afraid you guys were being used too.”

“Hey, we support the paranoia, man. But don’t forget, you’re not in this fight alone.” Frohike gave him a meaningful look that he chose to misinterpret.

“And we know what we’re doing, Mulder,” Byers reminded him.

“Yeah, we’re not some conspiracy theory noobs, dude. The Man can’t get one over on us,” Langly replied, his earlier ire dampened somewhat.

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. Thanks for this. I do appreciate it, really.”

“We know, Mulder. Let us know if there is anything useful in there,” Byers patted his arm reassuringly as he walked past.

“And if there’s anything we can use for the paper. It’s been a slow month,” Langly added.

“Feel free to share any photos of your scrumptious partner, Mulder. You know, as a thank-you for all our hard work,” Frohike suggested.

“Dream on, Frohike.”

“Oh I will, believe me.”

****

Chapter 1: March 1993

As soon as he got home, Mulder started sorting through the box. He ignored the fact that it was 4am and he should try to get some sleep. There was no way he was going to sleep until he assessed the contents. There was a mix of audio cassettes and digital files. Everything was labelled with dates but nothing else. As Mulder booted up his computer, he put the first cassette into his stereo, dated March 6th - March 31st 1993.

He heard his own voice through the speakers.

“Nobody down here but the FBI’s most unwanted!”

He cringed at the line. At the time, he had thought he was being witty.

“Agent Mulder. I’m Dana Scully. I’ve been assigned to work with you.”
“Oh isn’t it nice to be suddenly so highly regarded. So who did you tick off to get stuck with this detail, *Scully*?”
“Actually, I’m looking forward to working with you. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“Oh really? I was under the impression you were sent to spy on me.”

He shook his head, remembering that day. He had been so determined to hate her. And make her hate him. He did suspect she was sent to spy on him and work against him but even if she hadn’t been, there was no room for her in his work or his life. Oh, how wrong he had been. On both counts.

He smiled at how she had held her own with him, right from the very first. She was not taking any of his shit and it was entirely endearing. He had read her senior thesis and researched her professional and academic career. He knew she was smart but hadn’t known she was going to be so… feisty.

“What I find fantastic is any notion that there are answers beyond the realm of science. The answers are there, you just have to know where to look.”
“That’s why they put the ‘i’ in FBI.”

He groaned aloud, he couldn’t believe he had actually said that.

He heard her quiet, professional voice again. This time narrating her autopsy results and then her theories on the case. As he wondered how they had gotten hold of her private recordings, he clicked on the file marked with the same dates. His breath caught as the screen filled with dozens of documents. He started clicking through them, pausing only long enough to ascertain what they were before moving on to the next. There were the x-rays of the exhumed corpse, the photos he had taken of the autopsy, both their field reports and Scully’s additional report direct to Blevins. She had told him about those reports very early in their partnership. She had continued filing them for several years, of course, but after their trip to the arctic she had always shown them to him first. He kept clicking through the documents and found the transcript of Billy Miles’ hypnosis session, as well as follow-up medical reports he had never seen before. All of the missing paperwork on the case. He couldn’t believe it, the boys had been right. This was a veritable treasure trove of all the evidence and proof he had been denied over the last six and half years.

His attention was returned to the tape when he heard his own voice again. This time telling Scully about how he had found out there was no case file on Billy Miles and that they needed to talk. After she told him she would speak to him tomorrow, he heard the click of the phone being hung up before there was a shift in the audio quality. He heard a man’s voice he didn’t recognise.

“Anyone important?”
“Just work.”

Mulder gasped as he realised that Scully’s home phone and apartment had been bugged. As far back as then. Even as they sent her in as their spy, they hadn’t trusted her. Then he heard a very un-Scully-like giggle from the tape.

“Ethan! It’s late. We both have to be up early tomorrow.”
“Come on, Dana. We’re both awake now. And you owe me for bailing on our vacation. I feel like I’ve hardly seen you all month. I’ve missed you, baby.”

Mulder frowned at the idea of anyone calling Scully ‘baby’. Actually, he frowned at the idea of Scully *letting* anyone call her ‘baby’.

“Hmmm… oh! You’re already…”
“I told you, I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”

He heard soft wet sounds which he eventually realised was the sound of kissing. He stood to turn the tape off but then he heard her voice again. This time a little breathless.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so busy. This new assignment is very… involved.”

There was rustling and some other incoherent sounds.

“Mmmhmm. Well, you know, you and I are involved too. In fact, I’d like you to be more involved right now.”
“I’m not really in the mood, Ethan.”
“I’ll help you get in the mood, Dana. If you let me.”
“Ethan…”

Mulder recognised the warning in Scully’s tone.

“Fuck, Dana! What the fuck? I’ve hardly seen you all month and now you’re ‘not in the mood’. What’s going on?”
“Hey! You’ve been busy too, you know. You’re the one who didn’t get home until 11pm tonight!”
“Yeah, and you’re the one who pretended to be asleep when I did!”

The tape went silent for a few moments and Mulder knew he should turn it off. This had nothing to do with The X-Files and it was an invasion of Scully’s privacy. It obviously was something she didn’t want him to know about since she had never even mentioned this Ethan to him once.

“You’ve been different ever since your new assignment. You’ve been distant, disengaged. Even when we’re together it feels like you’re not really present. Is there something I should know about?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve seen photos of your new partner, Dana. Even if he is spooky, he’s an attractive man. And you have been working very closely together…”
“You think I’m cheating on you?!?”
“No, of course not. Not really. You just don’t seem like yourself.”
“You mean I’m not spending all my time accommodating you and your needs.”
“What? No! I mean -”
“I feel more like myself than I have in a long time, Ethan. I feel like I’m finally doing what I’m supposed to do. What I joined the FBI to do. I don’t want to be stuck in an autopsy bay forever, teaching new recruits. This new assignment is so intense and so thought-provoking -”
“The assignment or Fox Mulder?”
“Jesus, Ethan. If you think so little of me, why don’t you just leave?”
“You haven’t actually answered my question, Dana.”
“What question is that?”
“Have you slept with your new partner?”
“No! I would never do that to you, Ethan. And the fact that you think I can, makes me wonder about the strength of our relationship.”
“So you want to sleep with him, then?”
“What?!”
“Well, you said you wouldn’t do that to me, not that you didn’t think about it or want it.”
“For fuck’s sake Ethan! Go! Just get out!”
“It’s the middle of the night, Dana.”
“Good thing you’re not tired, then, isn’t it? Go home to your place, Ethan. I think we need some space.”
“Dana, please let’s just talk about this…”
“We can talk tomorrow. Right now I want you to leave.”

Mulder listened to the rustling on the tape and heard the door slam shut. The tape clicked off, having come to the end of the recording. He stared at the stereo for a moment, a myriad of thoughts passing through his brain.
Scully had had a boyfriend.
Scully never told him about said boyfriend.
The boyfriend accused Scully of sleeping with Mulder.
Scully did not deny that she wanted to.
How long had she been with Ethan?
Was it serious?
How long did the relationship last after she started working with him?
Mulder couldn’t decide if he felt guilty for the demise of the relationship or if he was pleased it had ended. Who was he kidding? He was delighted the relationship was over. It sounded like this Ethan guy was a jerk, anyway. And if he had been in her life, their partnership and friendship would never have become what it had. She was too good for that asshole. Mulder tried not to think about the fact that she was too good for him too.

Chapter Text

Mulder found himself flipping over the cassette. He knew he should call Scully before he continued. Now that he knew her phone and apartment had been bugged, there were certainly more private conversations in here that he shouldn’t hear. She should at least be with him when they reviewed them. He tried to justify to himself that he was researching. He didn’t know what might be uncovered in these cassettes. That he owed it to The X-Files and the Gunmen to pursue this to the last. But he knew, really, that even if that were true, he should give the tapes to Scully to listen to and she could find out if there was anything useful on them. He tried to convince himself that he was doing her a favour by not disturbing her while she was on vacation. But he knew this could wait. He was listening to conversations from over six years ago, surely another few days wouldn’t make any difference. But he found he couldn’t help himself. This glimpse into Dana Scully’s private world was just too enticing to resist.

“Dana? It’s Ellen. Are you busy?”
“Ellen! How are you?”
“John has taken Trent to the movies and I don’t know when I’ll get another couple of hours of free time! I wanted to see how you’re doing. It’s been a while since we spoke.”
“It has, hasn’t it? What’s new with you guys?”
“Nothing. Depressingly nothing. Every day feels the same. Which is why I’m calling - I plan to live vicariously through you. How’s Ethan?”
“Oh. Yeah. It has been a while. We broke up.”
“What? Why? Last I heard you were getting ready to officially move in together. What happened?”
“I got a new assignment at work - I’m out in the field a lot now. Ethan wasn’t very understanding about that. He was annoyed that I was away so much.”
“Away?”
“Yeah, my new job has me investigating cases all over the country. I can be away for several days at a time, often with little to no notice. My first ever case, I had to leave immediately and Ethan and I were supposed to be going on vacation. When I got back there was more work and he had deadlines at the station. For a month we didn’t really see each other and the cracks started to show. We officially broke up a couple of weeks ago.”
“Oh Dana. I’m so sorry. I really thought you two were going to stick. I thought you had finally found a good one!”
“What do you mean ‘finally’?”
“Well, sweetie, your recent track record isn’t great. First there was that debacle with Daniel and then you ran straight from him to that Jack guy. Ethan was stable, not in a position of power over you, and actually single.”

Mulder couldn’t help but wonder who Daniel was. He assumed the Jack Ellen mentioned was Jack Willis, Scully’s instructor at Quantico who she had dated for over a year. Who was Daniel and why the crack about Ethan being single?

“He was stable. And he was sweet most of the time. But he didn’t understand what the work meant to me. I think he was hoping I would, eventually, be the ‘little woman’ staying at home with the kids while he went out to work.”
“And what’s wrong with that?”
“Oh Ellen! Nothing! Nothing’s wrong with that. It’s just not what I want. Not yet anyway.”
“Relax Dana. I was kidding. Of course you’re not going to do that. After all the time, money, and energy you have spent studying and working to get to where you are? You would have to be crazy to give all that up. I assumed Ethan knew that, though.”
“Well, so did I. But apparently I was wrong. Everything was fine while I was working a structured nine to five job at the academy but as soon as that changed, he became really intolerant. No mention of all the late nights and time spent away on his job, though.”

He could hear the bitterness in Scully’s voice.

“Is this new job worth it, though?”
“I think it might be. And even if it isn’t, I can’t get past Ethan’s attitude to the whole thing.”
“OK, well tell me about the job then.”

Mulder noted the pause in the recording and could tell Scully was trying to figure out what to tell her friend so that she didn’t sound crazy.

“It’s hard to explain. We investigate cases that aren’t easily categorised into the other departments of the FBI.”

“Nice dodge, Scully,” Mulder whispered to himself.

“We? So you’re part of a team?”
“I’m working with someone. It’s… kind of his unit.”
“It’s a him?”
“Ellen, I work for the FBI. Most of my colleagues are ‘hims’.”
“So what you’re telling me is that he’s old and decrepit. Oh wait, that’s your thing, isn’t it?”

Wait, Scully has a thing for older men? Did Ellen just mean Jack? He was older than Scully but not by that much. Maybe this Daniel guy…?

“Ellen.”
“Oh, come on! You know I’m only teasing. But tell me the truth, is he ugly?”
“No, he’s not ugly. Actually he’s pretty cute.”
“Oh really?”

Oh really, Scully? Cute, huh?

“Oh shit. Dana, John and Trent just came home. Hang on -”
“Mommy, I’m sick! I spewded in the car.”
“In the new car, Ellen! On the leather upholstery!”
“Dana, I’ve -”
“I heard. Good luck with that.”
“Gee, thanks.”

Mulder heard the sound of the phone call disconnecting. A moment later he heard Scully’s voice again.

“Hello?”
“Oh Dana, I wasn’t sure you’d be home. I thought you might be off on another case.”
“Hi Ellen. No. No case at the moment.”
“Well, I know you can’t always plan too much ahead since you never know -”
“What’s up, Ellen?”
“Well, it’s Trent’s birthday next month -”
“I know. The 30th. I’m not that bad a Godmother!”
“So, he’s decided he wants a party. At home. On his actual birthday.”
“Sounds like fun for you.”
“And you. Well, at least I hope so. It’s a Friday so there’s no guarantee John will be able to make it home from the office in time and I could really use a hand wrangling a dozen six-year-olds.”
“Of course! I’d love to help. You know that.”
“But what if you have a case?”
“I’ll make sure I don’t. I can take a vacation day if I need to. I’m sure if there’s anything that pressing, Mulder can handle it himself.”
“Mulder?”
“My partner.”
“His name is Mulder? Is he foreign?”

Mulder heard Scully’s laugh burst through the tinny speakers. He hardly ever got to hear her laugh, try as he might. And, boy, did he try. He realised, though, that she did used to laugh and smile more back then.

“No. That’s his last name.”
“Why do you call him by his last name?”
“I’m not really sure. It just kind of happened. He called me ‘Scully’ when we first met so I called him Mulder. I guess it stuck. And I don’t think he really likes his first name.”

Well, that’s an understatement, Scully.

“What’s his first name?”
“Fox.”
“I can see where he’s coming from. Did his parents hate him or something? Does he have a sister called Faun?”

Mulder heard Scully’s quick intake of breath at the mention of his sister.

“So the 30th. What time do you want me there?”
“The party starts at 6:30 but I would love your help as early as possible.”
“I’ll be there.”
“Thanks. How’s everything else? Are you dating?”
“I only just broke up with Ethan!”
“Dana, that was months ago! And you didn’t sound all that broken up about it at the time.”
“No, I guess I wasn’t. I haven’t really had the time to think about dating, let alone actually go out with anyone.”
“Dana, you’ve got to have a life outside work. I know Ethan turned out to be a prick but he wasn’t exactly wrong.”
“I have a life!”
“Prove it.”
“I’m meeting a friend for lunch tomorrow.”
“Who?”
“Tom Colton.”
“That name sounds familiar…”
“We met at the FBI academy. We were good friends.”
“That’s right! He used to follow you around like a little puppy dog!”
“I never said that, Ellen.”
“Yes, but I can read between the lines. Does he know that you’re single?”
“I don’t know. I don’t see how he could. I might have mentioned it to Brad Wilson - he’s a mutual friend. But why would it matter?”

Mulder shook his head, a rueful smile on his lips. She was the smartest person he knew but she really could be very dense sometimes.

“Because if he knows you're single, that might be why he asked you out for lunch. He doesn’t want to miss his window this time.”
“How do you know I didn’t ask him?”
“Did you?”
“Well, no but -”
“But nothing. It’s a date, Dana. Well, it’s a pre-date. You watch, he’ll find a way to suss out if you’re still single. Then he’ll ask you out for real.”
“We’re just friends and colleagues, Ellen. He doesn’t want to date me.”
“He’s wanted to date you since he met you, Dana. God, you’re naive sometimes.”
“I’m not naive. I just don’t assume every human male wants to jump my bones.”
“Well, you should.”

She’s right, Scully. You really should assume that at all times, Mulder thought. Because more often than not it is true.

“Honey? I can’t find the ice-cream. Where did you put it?”
“I put it in the washing machine. Where the hell do you think I put it? It’s in the freezer.”
“But I can’t see it.”
“Heaven help me… Sorry Dana, I better go.”
“Sounds like a dessert-based crisis.”
“Honestly, I’m not sure how the man survived to adulthood on his own. I want to hear all about your date!”
“It’s not a -”

Ellen had obviously hung up before Scully had been able to finish her reply. He knew that Colton had asked Scully to look into the Tooms case at that lunch. But he wondered if he had had other intentions as well. Thankfully he turned out to be such an asshole that Scully actually lodged an official complaint against him. He assumed she never saw him again after that, either professionally or socially. He remembered feeling spiteful satisfaction when he heard a year or so ago that Colton had been fired from Violent Crimes.

He listened as the cassette played the message that Scully had left for him the night Tooms attacked her, chuckling now at the idea that she had thought he had some kind of social life. A moment later he heard what he now recognised as Ellen’s voice.

“Rob said you blew him off.”
“Well hello to you too.”
“Dana, he’s a nice guy. Good, stable job. Fantastic with Scott. Good looking. Why the hell would you blow him off?”
“I didn’t exactly blow him off…”
“He said you ran out on your date -”
“We had finished eating. We were having a coffee. And I had a work emergency.”
“Then when he called you a week later to ask you out again, you said you couldn’t go. Then he called you several times after that but every time you cut the call short and never called him back.”
“I was busy with work…”
“Dana!”
“What? I was. But he was just…”
“He was just what?”

Yeah, Scully. He was just what? Curious minds want to know, Mulder thought, unconsciously leaning forward towards his stereo and the sound of her voice. He remembered the guy calling her at the office and her saying that she had no interest in seeing him again.

“He was kind of… dull.”
“Dull?”
“No. That’s unfair. He was lovely. We just didn’t have anything in common.”
“You knew that after one date?”
“I knew that after the entree.”
“Dana.”
“Ellen.”
“Dana, you’ve got to give guys more of a chance than one date! He was probably nervous. And I don’t think he’s dated a lot since his divorce.”
“Ellen, let it go.”
“OK, well John’s got a friend from the office. He’s handsome, smart, no kids -”
“Ellen! Stop trying to set me up!”
“Why? Dana, don’t you want to meet someone? Settle down. Have a family?”
“Yeah, of course I do. It’s just… I’m actually enjoying being single. It’s nice not to be accountable to anyone. And work is so hectic. It’s just not a good time.”
“Can’t you ask for a transfer?”
“Why do you say that?”
“Well, because you’re letting this take over your life. And you said that he was a jerk.”
“I said that he was obsessed with his work.”
“After you said he was a jerk.”

Mulder thought about himself around the time that this conversation was occurring. He was very focused and self-indulgent. Nothing mattered but the work. He had respected Scully and, despite his best efforts, had liked her. He had even been starting to think he could trust her at that point. But he had only valued her for what she could bring to The X-Files. How her mind and expertise could further his quest. He had been a jerk.

“And now you’re becoming obsessed with his work too. Get a transfer, Dana.”
“I don’t want to. I love this assignment. It’s so challenging - as an agent, as a scientist. I get to keep up my pathology skills while still being a field agent. And working with Mulder is…”

Mulder held his breath, waiting for her to complete the sentence.

“Working with Mulder is what?”
“Working with Mulder is so thoroughly stimulating that it’s hard to think of another role that would be nearly as satisfying.”
“Wow, Dana. Interesting word choice. Should I page Dr Freud?”

So you noticed that too, huh Ellen? Mulder couldn’t help but grin as he imagined his young, stoic partner blushing at the realisation of the potential double meaning of her words.

“Grow up, Ellen!”
“Hey, don’t shoot the messenger. I just call ‘em as I see ‘em.”
“Just, stay out of my love life, OK?”
“What love life?”
“Ellen!”
“Fine. Whatever. But Steven’s a catch and he won’t stay single for long…”
“Goodnight, Ellen.”

Chapter Text

Mulder lay on his couch, watching the dust motes dance around in the weak winter morning sunshine starting to stream through his dirty window. He realised that there should have been a lot more recorded in the period of four months. Surely she had spoken to her parents, called in a take-out order, had people over. Mulder thought back to the conversations he had heard. They had all included her talking about him or their work. That was it. This wasn’t a record of all of Scully’s conversations on her phone and in her home - only ones that referenced, directly or indirectly, The X-Files. Which meant that those bastards had listened to all of the content and just kept whatever they thought might be relevant at some point. Mulder was disgusted by the idea of those sinister old men curating Scully’s life even while he was overwhelmingly envious of all the parts of Scully’s life that they were privy to that he wasn’t. He was nauseated by the realisation that he was, ultimately, no better than those he despised, listening to Scully’s private and personal moments without her knowledge or consent. Even as he thought this, Mulder stood to put the next cassette in. He hated himself as he did it, but he couldn’t stop. And he had long since given up any pretence of looking at the files on his computer. He would do that later. For now, he sat back on his couch and let the sound of Scully’s voice wash over him as the sunlight started to stream through his window.

“Hi Mom. Sorry I missed your calls. Is everything OK with you and Dad?”
“Dana, honey! Hello. Yes, everything’s fine here but I was starting to get worried about you!”
“Sorry, Mom. I had to go out of town for work.”
“But I rang your cell phone.”
“We were, uh, out of range of cell service.”
“Where on Earth were you?”
“The Icy Cape, Alaska.”
“YOU WERE IN THE ARCTIC AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME!?”
“Mom, it was work. We got the assignment and had to leave. I’ve told you, I can’t always contact you while I’m on a case or even before I leave. You’ll just have to trust me that I’ll call when I can and that I can look after myself.”
“But Dana -”
“Mom. We’ve been through this. This is my job. You and Dad have to accept that. I know it’s not what you wanted for me but it’s what I have chosen.”
“I know. I’m sorry, honey, I know. But you’re my baby girl, I’m always going to worry about you. And now with this dangerous job… Just tell me that you’ve got someone watching your back.”
“I do, Mom. My partner and I work very well together. Even in very challenging situations, even when we don’t agree, I know he’ll be there when I need him.”

Mulder smiled at the thought that Scully seemed to have had the same revelation during that case as he did. That they could, in fact, trust each other implicitly. Even when they couldn’t know if people were who they were, they could still trust in each other. He let her lock him in that storage room because he knew she needed to gain control of the situation. And she wouldn’t let them infect him before she checked him out. It had been from that moment on, for better or worse, that it had truly been the two of them against the world. It was after that case that he knew he was no longer all alone in the world. He was glad that she had felt the same connection.

****

“Mulder, it’s me.”
“Hey Scully. I’ve got some new composites for what Barnett might look like now - if he had reversed the ageing process. I know you don’t -”
“Mulder, you’re going to want to come over here.”
“What’s going on?”
“A man claiming to be Dr Ridley is sitting in my living room.”
“Claiming to be?”
“He’s… young. Mulder, he looks almost exactly the same as he did in 1974.”
“I’ll be right there.”

Mulder heard the audio switch again - which he now recognised as when the surveillance shifted from tapped phone calls to the bugged apartment.

“Stay right where you are.”
“I’m not here to hurt you. I want to help you.”
“Be that as it may, you’re going to sit in that chair until my partner gets here. Then you’re going to answer our questions.”

There was no response. Mulder listened to silence for such a long time, he started to doze off. But then he heard a knocking sound and his own voice. He listened to himself interrogate Ridley and thought back to who Scully had been then. She had not long lost her father and then there had been the situation where Willis had died and been possessed by the soul of a murderer-in-love, and then died again. Not to mention everything else that had happened to her over that past year. And she had taken it all in her stride. Every day her beliefs were tested, as was her resilience and her strength. And he never saw her falter. Not that she would have let him see that, he realised. She didn’t hesitate to step up to be the bait to catch Barnett. He knew she was scared, of course she was, but she didn’t let it show.

There was a click on the tape and suddenly there was another knocking sound.

“Kathy, I’m so glad you came. Come in. Let me take your coat.”
“Hi Dana. Thanks.”
“Can I get you some tea?”
“That would be lovely.”

There was the sound of the kettle and Scully and her guest chatted about traffic and the weather. Mulder frowned as he could swear he recognised the voice but couldn’t quite place it. He didn’t think it was anyone from the FBI but he didn’t know why else he would recognise someone in Scully’s apartment. He heard Scully make a sound as if she were in pain.

“Are you alright, Dana?”
“I’m fine. My ribs are just bruised and sometimes they hurt if I move the wrong way. It’s no big deal.”
“No big deal? You were shot, Dana!”
“I was wearing a kevlar vest. It doesn’t really count.”

There was a moment of silence and Mulder swore he could hear Scully trying to get her thoughts in order before speaking. He heard that silence from her so many times over the years, it somehow had its own cadence, even through the distortion of a recording.

“Kathy, I’m so sorry for what happened. We never thought he would be in the auditorium. It never occurred to me that you were in any danger. You have to know that there’s no way I would have let the operation go ahead if I thought anything like that could happen…”

Mulder realised how he recognised the voice. It was Scully’s friend, the cellist who Barnett had taken hostage after he shot at Scully. He had met her briefly before the sting, before she became yet another pawn in the cosmic game against him. Mulder felt a familiar wave of guilt wash over him.

“Dana, it’s OK -”
“It’s not OK! It won’t ever be OK, but I hope you can forgive me.”
“Of course I can. I know you would never put anyone in danger. Not on purpose. And you caught the bad guy. No harm done.”

He heard Kathy give an awkward laugh and he could just picture the face that Scully was making at her.

“How are you doing, really? Have you been seeing that therapist the FBI sent you to?”
“Yes. She’s very good. And, hey, free therapy - who turns their noses up at that these days? Honestly, sometimes I still have nightmares and I can’t wear turtlenecks anymore but I promise I’m OK. We’ve even booked a new date for the recital. I hope you’ll still come?”
“If you want me to, of course!”
“Just don’t bring the men with the guns this time. Though, you could bring that sexy partner of yours who saved my life. I’m not sure I was in the right frame of mind to properly express my heartfelt gratitude at the time. I wouldn’t mind another opportunity. Do those lips feel as good as they look?”

Even in the privacy of his own home, Mulder felt himself blush. He knew that he was considered attractive but to hear someone talk about him like that, and to Scully, was awkward. Even if it was seven years ago. He heard Scully clear her throat.

“I wouldn’t know, Kathy. We work together. That’s all. I’d be happy to see if Mulder wanted to come to the recital so you could meet him again. Or I could give him your number if you like?”

Mulder couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment at the thought that Scully was willing to set him up with one of her friends. Even way back then.

“Uh-uh, I’m not making that mistake again.”
“What mistake?”
“Cutting your grass. Remember when you insisted you didn’t have a crush on Ryan Thripps? And then I kissed him and you wouldn’t speak to me for two whole weeks!”
“First of all, you would not be ‘cutting my grass’ if you were to date Mulder. Second of all, we were 13 and I *didn’t* have a crush on Ryan. We were friends. Third of all, I didn’t talk to you for two weeks because you cheated! You rigged the bottle.”
“So I could kiss Ryan! And you were jealous.”
“I was not jealous! I was mad that you cheated, not that you kissed Ryan. It just wasn’t in the spirit of the game.”
“OK, sure, Dana. It was all about the ‘spirit of the game’ and fair play.”
“It was. Those things are very important to me. So important that I made pursuing justice my career, in fact.”
“Touche. But regardless, I think I’ll still decline. Just in case.”

Mulder smiled at the image of 13-year-old braces-and-freckles Scully being in a huff because her friend hadn’t followed the rules. He was sure she did have a crush on this Ryan boy but he also believed her when she said she was mad about the dishonesty. Scully has such a strong sense of justice and right and wrong. She believed wholly in rules and felt that they existed for the greater good of all. Her understanding of what was fair and right had changed over the years but not her commitment to the ideals. Now, she would break the rules, throw out the book, defy authority - but only when she believed it was necessary for justice to triumph.

Chapter Text

Mulder had turned the cassette over again, not even trying to justify his actions anymore. He knew he was going to listen. He knew he shouldn’t but he would anyway.

He heard his own voice again, this time in her apartment.

“You’ve got to see this, Scully.”
“Mulder, I thought we were leaving to find the truck.”
“No. This is so much bigger. It’s exactly what I’ve been searching for.”
“What? What is it, Mulder?”
“Proof.”

There were some rustling sounds and he knew he was handing her the photo that his source had given him. What he believed, at the time, to be tangible proof not just of the existence of extraterrestrials but also of the government knowledge and cover-up of that fact. He heard her take a deep breath and the sound of her shoes as she walked away from him to get the magnifying glass. Of course Scully had a magnifying glass at home. He listened to himself rant for a while before her calm but insistent voice interrupted him.

“Mulder, this photograph is a fake.”

She explained to him all the things that didn’t add up about the photograph, demanding that they at least have it analysed. He remembered how angry he had gotten at her. How frustrated that she couldn’t just believe.

“Why don’t you just admit it, Scully? You’re determined not to believe him.”
“Well maybe you’re too determined to believe him.”
“*I am* determined to follow a lead that may result in the proof of extraterrestrial biological entities. I need to go.”
“Mulder, listen to me -”
“No.”

He winced at how petulant he sounded. Like a child on the verge of a tantrum after not getting his own way. But Scully, as always, wouldn’t give up on him.

“Please! Will you just hear me? I have never met anyone so passionate and dedicated to a belief as you. It’s so… intense that sometimes it’s blinding. But there are others who are watching you who know what I know. And whereas I can… respect and admire your passion, they will use it against you. Mulder, the truth is out there. But so are lies.”

This was the first time he really heard what she had said here. At the time, he was too embittered by the idea that she was being captious out of spite or stubbornness to actually hear what she was saying. He got the gist of it, of course, and eventually the rationality of her argument had sunk in and he had had the photograph analysed and it was, indeed, a fake. But at the time, he didn’t understand what she was saying to him. He didn’t understand that this was her being on his side. This was Scully trying to protect him, from those that would harm him, those that would mislead him, but most of all she was trying to protect him from himself. He wished he had appreciated her more back then. Had appreciated her dedication to him and the work even though she didn’t believe. She was committed to finding the truth, just like he was. She just wouldn’t get caught up in any alluringly packaged misdirections. God, what would he have done without her? How many falsehoods and betrayals would he have succumbed to without her patient, diligent approach to the work?

Mulder’s attention was brought back to the tape at the sound of knocking.

“Who is it?”
“Your knights in shining armour, m’lady!”

Mulder laughed at Frohike’s attempt at flirty gallantry.

“What?”
“Scully, it’s me. I’ve brought the Lone Gunmen to de-bug your apartment. Can you let us in, please?”
“Mulder, what the hell are you doing?”

Mulder remembered how Scully had eyed the three men suspiciously as they started setting up their equipment on her dining table.

“Look, we know we were being bugged. The pen, my apartment. Who knows if they stopped there? We cleared my place of any kind of surveillance, now it’s your turn.”
“Mulder…”
“Please? Please just humour me, Scully. What harm can it do?”

There was a crash on the recording and he heard Langly apologise dismissively. He chuckled as he remembered Scully’s glare as she tidied up the broken knickknack that Langly had knocked over in his enthusiasm for the task at hand. She had let them do it though. He had assured her that they were the best - that nothing could get past them. Apparently he had been wrong.

“I’ll take the bedroom!”
“Stay out of the drawers, Frohike!”
“Hey man, we need to be thorough. Leave no stone, or, um, undergarment unturned.”

Scully had shot him another glare, this time one that would have killed a lesser man, and raced after Frohike into the bedroom.

****

“Hello?”
“Hi Dana.”
“Missy! Hi! It’s so good to hear your voice.”
“Yours, too. How are you, Dana?”
“I’m well. Missy, the connection’s not great. Where are you?”
“Florence.”
“Florence, *Italy*?”
“Si. I met some painters. We’re doing a pilgrimage.”
“Since when did you paint?”
“I’m the muse.”
“Of course you are. Be careful, OK, Missy? And if you need anything - money, anything - you know you can call. Collect. Anytime.”
“Thanks Dana. But listen, I don’t have long and I’m calling for a reason.”
“Yes?”
“I had a dream.”
“You’re calling me from Italy to tell me about a dream?”
“You were in the dream. It’s a message for you.”
“OK…”
“You were trapped somewhere and you were being attacked.”
“By who?”
“I couldn’t tell - it was all shadowy figures. But you were being protected.”
“Couldn’t I protect myself?”
“Actually, yes. But there were too many and they were too strong. You couldn’t do it alone. I was really scared for you, Dana. But then this fox appeared. He was beautiful and strong and noble. He came right to your side and together you defeated the shadows. He was injured. Very badly. But you healed him. You gathered the fox into your arms and you saved him.”

Mulder heard Scully’s quick intake of breath and he thought Melissa must have heard it too.

“Does that mean something to you, Dana?”
“No…”
“Dana, I can tell when you’re lying. Even 4000 miles away on a dodgy line.”
“It’s just… Missy, have you spoken to Mom recently?”
“No. Not for several months. Why?”
“It’s just that… well, the man I’m working with at the FBI… His name is Fox.”
“Dana! That’s it!”
“Mom didn’t tell you?”
“No. I swear she didn’t mention it. Dana, you can trust this man. Completely.”
“Well, that’s good because he’s my partner and I kind of need him to watch my back.”
“No, Dana, it's more than that. You can trust him with your soul, with your spirit.”
“Missy….”
“Listen to me. This man is important to you. He’s important to your future. And you are vital for his.”
“Missy, it was a dream. It doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a coincidence. I’m sure if you had dreamed about an eagle I would have connected it to my new boss, who happens to be bald. It’s human instinct to make these connections. They don’t *mean* anything.”
“Well, it doesn’t matter if you believe me or not. You two are destined to be together. You will save each other. A thousand times. More. It’s fate. You can’t escape it.”
“I hope I don’t need to be saved a thousand times. By anyone.”
“I’m not talking about being physically saved. Or not just that, anyway. I’m talking on a spiritual level. Your auras are connected and you need each other to heal. But you will cause each other pain, too. You have to be careful of that.”
“You’re just making this up now, Missy.”
“You can tell yourself that if you want. Like I said, it doesn’t matter. It’s out of your hands.”
“Missy, call Mom. She misses you and she’s worried.”
“Tell her I love her. Love you, too, Dana. Bye!”
“Missy, wait! When are you coming home? Missy? Damnit Missy!”

He considered what Melissa had told Scully. How right she had been. Scully had healed him. She had not only saved his life and tended his wounds and injuries over the years but she had healed his soul. She had been a balm for the internal pain seared into his psyche, a pain that he had learnt to live with, a perpetual dull ache that he had grown accustomed to. He’s not sure exactly when it happened, but one day he realised that soul-deep anguish was less. And each time a new wound was inflicted onto his spirit, she was there to soothe it and tend it in the same way she did to his physical injuries. Her tender heart and fierce commitment to him saved him. He had tried to tell her that once but he wasn’t sure she truly understood what he meant when he said that she had made him a whole person.