Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Mizuki laid on the couch as they wrapped themselves tighter with the heavy blanket. 

It’s all they seem to do these days after Ena died.

They remember it well. They just got married and after two years of warm and fond memories…it all had to stop

When they married her, it wasn’t a cookie cutter wedding. It only consisted of their closest friends. An had cried her eyes out once she heard she was going to be their flower girl

Rui had on the happiest smile when they asked him to be their right hand person, spinning them around and around happily until both got dizzy.

Kanade and Mafuyu were their maids as well, Kanade for Ena’s side and Mafuyu for their side. Both were incredibly happy for Ena’s side. (‘What an improvement from high school Mafuyu-Chan…” Mizuki said to themselves later on)

Mizuki had a pink wedding dress, Ena had purple. A silver band decorated their ring fingers and it was perfect.

The one who got the bouquet was Toya, who caught it in his lap after it had bonked off of Minori’s head (Poor Minori!) Everyone had laughed after seeing Akito and Toya’s faces so red even though they were already married before them. Toya ended up throwing it back at the crowd which finally landed at Airi.

“I TOLD YOU I’M GONNA BE THE NEXT BRIDE SAKI-CHAN!!”

“NEXT BRIDE?!? ENA DIDN’T EVEN THROW IT AT YOU!!! TOYA DID!”

“STILL COUNTS SINCE HE’S TECHNICALLY A BRIDE AND PLUS HE’S MARRIED!!!”

Mizuki had laughed through it all and watched as the girls fought for the bouquet

It was the most cherished memory for Mizuki

“Enanan!!! I’m home~!” They said after hanging out with Rui and An for the day

“In here.” They went inside the living room to hear instrumental of one of their songs

“Ooh~ We in the mood for Charles my honey bunches of oats?”

Ena rolled her eyes 

“Never call me that again please.”

“Awww”

Ena takes their hands and arranges them on her shoulder and hips

“Won’t you dance with me Miz?”

Mizuki is smitten with how Ena’s eyes glisten in the fluorescent lights

“Why of course princess~”

They slow dance in the dimly lit room to the beat of the music

Mizuki feels tears on their shirt towards the middle of the song and becomes alarmed

“Ena? What’s wrong?” They stop and the one hand on her shoulder goes to wipe away Ena’s tears

“Mizuki…I have cancer…”

Mizuki tightly holds Ena in their arms as they both fall slowly to the wooden floor

“H-how…how long?”

“T-three months…I-I didn’t know…I’m so sorry..”

“No, no… Don’t apologize Ena…it’ll be ok…”

Ena sobs in their shoulder

“A-Akito! He’ll be devastated! The only fucking person in the whole damn family who cared about him and-and disappear! Airi-Chan, Mafuyu, Kanade! I don’t wanna die Mizuki! I don’t wanna leave you!” 

“You won’t die…You won’t die…”

“I will…I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” 

“W-what?” Mizuki says after a few minutes

“I went to the doctors today…I thought I had something wrong with me when I saw bruises all over when I hit into something…So I went to them and she said…she examined me and…I have cancer.”

Ena looks at them and teary eyes

“I don’t have much time left Mizuki.”

And with that Mizuki broke down in tears along with Ena, their happy ending shattering all over again.

Ena ruffles Akito’s soft hair as he holds her hand in his hair, Mizuki came in after she was finished speaking with him so to see even the most stubborn man they knew cry was heartbreaking

“Mizu…”

“Yes Enanan?”

“Promise you’ll wake up by my side and make me breakfast tomorrow morning?”

“Of course I would Ena.”

“Don’t forget about the list on the fridge ok?”

“Ok sweetie.”

“Mizu?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too Ena.”

The constant beeps have been replaced with a steady sound that is unchanging.

The funeral wasn’t any better. Akito ended up silently sobbing into Toya’s shoulder after placing a bouquet at the tall grave with her name embedded in it as well as her cremated remains buried. When Airi put her own bouquet in it as well as a pencil with a heart shaped eraser, she broke down and fell to her knees crying in front of the grave. Everyone put a bouquet of flowers in for their lost friend.

It was raining that day. Outside for everyone and inside for Mizuki’s heart.

Toya wrapped a hand around Akito, placing his hand on his shoulder and letting him cry into his shoulder while his other hand was holding an umbrella

Pale brown umbrellas. That’s what Airi wanted for everyone to have at the funeral. Ena had always argued that it was yellow not brown.

Now she wasn’t here to argue anymore was she?

Airi’s tears never stopped, she tightly holds Shizuku’s hand as she sobs. Her closest best friend who she called her sister is gone. 

Kanade’s tears were silent but Mizuki knew how depressed she felt. Mafuyu too, they knew. Kanade had left her share of flowers.

White Egret Orchids. 

“They mean my thoughts will follow you into your dreams. Ena will always be with us.” Kanade explained

Mafuyu’s flowers were different. 

Pink Carnations and Purple Hyacinths 

“Remember and regret. There’s many things I wanted to say to Ena. I guess…I guess I’ll never say them.” Mafuyu and Kanade stayed by Mizuki’s side

The rain pelted them as they stood for what seemed like hours in front of her grave until it suddenly stopped. The three turned around to find a small smile from Tsukasa and Rui with a big umbrella

“See? I told you it was a good idea to get a big umbrella.” Tsukasa said to Rui

“Hm~ I guess so my star. Come on you three, you looked soaked and we’re going to the nearby bar.”

Mafuyu grabs Mizuki’s wrist and follows them. Mizuki has a ugly horrid jealousy welling inside their heart seeing how everyone still has each other and yet they don’t.

Akito has Toya to cry on, to sleep with when nights get cold or lonely, to hug and kiss him when he breaks down. What about them?

Airi has Shizuku when she can’t sleep, when she doesn’t have anyone else to talk to, when she remembers that her friend is not here anymore. What about them?

Oh and they’re so guilty about this one. Jealousy of their own friend. The one who’s been by their side since middle school.

Rui.

He has Tsukasa. He has someone who can warm his heart up and make him fall in love over and over again. He can talk to him whenever he wants, he can cuddle him or call him whenever he needs. He can…he can dance, sing, and whisper sweet words to him whenever he wants. 

The burning jealousy goes even to Mafuyu and Kanade. They have each other. They can talk about her without having to be careful. They can emphasize with each other, do all sorts of things to move on.

What about them? 

Sure, they still have the sekai, they all frequently visit the Vocaloids. But will they truly emphasize with them?

No. Not in the way that Ena did. Never.

Mizuki took a sip of the fine wine, anything to get their mind off of her. But it doesn’t work. All around them are people mourning her loss.

A warm presence snaps them out of it

“So. How…how does it taste?”

They look into her blue eyes while putting their head in their arms on the table

“Good.”

“I heard from Rui-Kun that Toya-kun bought it. He got two more bottles for everyone else…he doesn’t drink as well as Akito.”

“Neither did Ena. Always complained that it was too bitter.” They laugh for a second before taking another sip of the glass

“You can drink but, please not too much. It’s not good for you.”

“Wanna take my mind off her.”

“You know you can’t do that Mizuki. She’ll always be in your mind. It’s unhealthy.”

They look at her before swiping all the liquid away from their glass 

“…fine.”

Kanade takes the glass away and gives it to some random person, Mizuki can’t care right now. Everything is too foggy for them.

“Did you lock your door?”

Mizuki nods ever so slightly but Kanade can easily see it

“Good, I’m going to take you home with us today.”

“W-whyy…” Mizuki slurs out

“You’re drunk Mizuki. Remember? You can’t take alcohol well.”

Mizuki smiles softly at the memory of Ena mirroring her words

“Mizuki, I don’t wanna drinkkkk” Ena exaggerates her words out at the table

“Come on! It’ll be fun! Drinking contest between the Kamiyama kids! Plus Kohane!” Mizuki nudges her shoulder

Akito, Ena, Rui, and Kohane sit on the opposite side of the table

“Is…is this a good idea?” Toya asked Mizuki

“Nope!”

“We all don’t even drink-“ 

“Akito! Shhh!” They exclaim

“3, 2, 1, Go!” The other four shout

They all down the glass and wait 10 minutes but nothing happens

“Can I have water now? It tastes bitter!” Kohane exclaims

“It’s interesting…Fufufu, mind if I take a bottle home to try to make an alcohol robot?” 

“…bland. 0/10” Akito states

“IT’S BITTER! MIZUKI!”

Mizuki laughs before they switch sides

An, Mizuki, Tsukasa, and Toya switch sides with their partners

“Akito, if I say anything bad, please don’t record.”

“I can’t do that partner.”

Toya whines at that before putting his hands on his face

“HAHA! Mizuki and I will crush this!”

“I’ll try my best!” Tsukasa states

“Go!”

After downing their own drinks, they wait again and…results are interesting…

“OH FUCK TOYA?!” Tsukasa yells when he sees Toya in his arms on the table

He pops out with a pink blush on his face and a silly smile

“Heh…I don’t drink for this reason….”

Mizuki and An are singing some random song that sounds like…Newly Edgy Idols..?

“They failed for sure. Tsukasa is the winner!” 

Tsukasa poses before they all hear Toya’s head thud against the table

“Toya!” Tsukasa shakes him

“Mmmmmm lemme sleep…Akito can wake me…with a kiss later…”

“BITCH THIS AIN’T NO SLEEPING BEAUTY?!” Ena shouts at him

“And that’s my cue to take him home. We are never doing this shit again.” Akito says as he stands up 

He helps Toya stand up but-

“Akiiiii…say bye firstttt”

“Yeah Aki~” Rui teases

He rolls his eyes

“Bye everyone. See you soon.” He tries to pull Toya out but he stands still

“Legs…tired…” Akito glares at the other four who see to be watching him. In one swift motion, he picks up Toya like he did at their wedding and everyone cheers. Ena takes pictures of them for blackmail 

As the two make it out the door with Mizuki and Ena at the door watching them get to their car safety they hear some words 

“You’re never drinking again.”

“Mmkay…”

Ena flicks Mizuki’s head and they dramatically yell

“E-naaaa!!!”

“C’mon, let’s go home. I’m driving.”

“Huh? Whyyy??”

“You’re drunk Mizuki. Remember? You can’t take alcohol well.” Ena scolds them

She waves to the other three who are currently fending off a heavily drunk An

“BYE MIZUKIIIII!!!” An waves frantically to them

“BYEEE ANNN!”

Driving home was surprisingly quiet. Mizuki slept in the car, the moment they got in

“Mizuki?”

“Mmmh?”

“I love you, but please don’t get drunk again. Your drunk singing sucks ass.”

“Mmkayyy…love you too..”

Mizuki’s tears well up in their eyes again as they make their way down Mizuki’s face. Kanade hugs them tightly

“We’ll all be here for you Mizu.”

Mizuki sobs and laughs in her dress

‘You’ll all be here for me huh? But you can’t bring her back, you can be here but not by my side like she was.’

Ena’s voice strikes them out of their head

“All life is ridiculously pretty
Being upside down and godlike
It's an unprecedented failure in human history
That's what "I" am” 

Mizuki gasps out and is hopeful until they remember Ena is gone. Tears well up again and they wipe them constantly

‘It’s just my phone…’

They look at the caller id 

Lil Brosef

Mizuki puts their phone down besides them

‘Sorry Akito. Don’t wanna talk today either.’

TODAY 5:54

Lil Brosef: Happy birthday, just gonna let u know Rui is def gonna come over and haul ur ass somewhere in 2 hours. Don’t say I didn’t warn u

They play Ena’s last voice mail again

“Hey Mizuki! I’m shopping with Airi-Chan and her friends right now but-“ Small snickers and laughs are heard “Guys!! I just wanted to say, I love you. Yeah yeah, I was forced to say it in front of them, lost a bet. But,” Her voice tunes to a softer sounding tone “I really do love you. These past years with you have been the best, I love you a lot Mizuki. I gotta go now, bye!”

Mizuki sighs out, not having enough energy to press the stop button on the voicemail. They know that all there’s left is silence because Airi took her pho—

“Oh and!”

Mizuki quickly sits up, startled by her voice

“I don’t know if I’ll tell you this before…But, I want to say I left a list on the fridge. Read for me won’t you?”

The voicemail ends with a click and Mizuki puts frantically puts their phone in their pocket and turns on the bright lights. 

The place is dusty, incredibly dusty. But, it’s not messy. Everything has stayed where they’ve been for months. Mizuki couldn’t bear to see any of Ena’s plushies, opting to throw them on the couch and cover them with a blanket. They go to the fridge which has been left unused for months as well. (Akito and Rui meet up every two days to get food with Mizuki to make sure they don’t die. Mizuki thinks that’s their only meal every week until they see them again.)

They wipe the dust away from the fridge and pulls the cat shaped magnet off the light yellow envelope underneath all the drawings

“My dearest Mizuki Akiyama, are you seeing this? I hope you are.” is written in her handwriting with a glittery purple color on the back of the envelope 

Mizuki sobs as they never thought they would have anything handwritten from Ena again

They gently open the letter, instantly smelling the perfume she always wore. Pulling out the piece of paper inside

Amia. 

     Me writing a letter to you? Bit strange isn’t it? Writing a letter to you after I’m dead, hiding it underneath all my drawings, and expecting you to actually look at the fridge. Lemme guess… You read this on your birthday, 27/8 right?

‘Right you are again Ena.’

That being said, if I’m right…Happy birthday! I’m so sorry I couldn’t celebrate with you physically this year. I really wanted to see you panic about being 30 next year. Ha! The look on your face when a foreigner kid called you old was gold! Happy 29th birthday Mizu. There’s so many things I wished we could have done together. Ok, ok, stop picking on you I know, I know, but it’s so fun! Now I get why Akito and you tease me so much. 

‘No, you oath. Keep teasing me.’

Speaking of which, I wrote a letter to everyone but you are a special occasion. As my last present, I sent you seven letters for the next seven weeks. Ok, maybe writing this next to Mafuyu isn’t such a good idea. “Seven days is 1 and a half months” my ass. Back on topic though, you gotta do what I say for these letters! They’re very important to me. Maybe to you too. You’ll know when you’ll find them but I helped you with one of them. It’ll come in tomorrow. I don’t want you to cry over me for so long! That’s so boring and sad! Wear some flashy clothing, go buy some clothes with a friend, try new food with Rui or Toya (Note: Don’t get squid for Toya! He hates it! He’s not a picky eater but he’ll trade that with Akito’s carrots anytime. I see them!!!) 

First things first though, FUCKING SHOWER. BRUSH YOUR DAMN TEETH. DRINK WATER. and call the girls and maybe if you’re up to it Rui or An! Hold on, or call somebody who you rarely talk to instead of those three and the girls! I don’t want you looking like Mizook instead of Mizuki in front of our friends.

I wanted to remind you though, I miss you a lot wherever I am. Just remember that. 

I love you.

Also, please invest in a fucking dust cleaner and working vacuum and throw the old one out. Buy new lightbulbs and make sure you’re drinking water.

Dreadfully yours,
                            Enanan  

P.S I love you.

Mizuki wipes their tears away and laughs at how Ena-like it is. They fold the letter up and put it back in it’s envelope

They take a shower for the first time in weeks 

‘You know, I should try talking to someone beside them…’

“Uhm…Hello Toya here, is anything needed?”

“Hey, what would you think of having a small little date with Rui and I today?”

“Mizuki-kun?!” 

There are questing murmurs and outbursts on Toya’s side. His group must have been rehearsing for a show.

How happy Ena was when Akito told her that his group surpassed Rad Weekend. They weren’t going to stop there, no.

“So Toya-kun?”

“A-ah! Yeah! Sorry, was distracted. W-what time?”

‘Distracted with me, that’s why.’

“Hmm how about.. thirty minutes from now? The Cat Cafe on 31st?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there.”

“Put me on speaker ro quick.”

They hear affirmation from Toya a moment later

“Hi Akito, An, Kohane.”

“Mizuki! We miss you!!!” An shouts

“Man you’re loud!”

“Shut the fuck up!”

“How have you been Mizuki-Kun?” 

“Fine Kohane.”

There’s some back talk and some small chats before they all say their goodbyes

Mizuki then hangs up the phone

Mizuki dresses up without being forced for the first time in weeks. When they get out the bedroom, they see Ena laying on the bed.

Ena’s soft brown eyes open and she smiles at them

“I just wanna say.

P.S I love you.”

When Mizuki blinks again, she’s no longer there.

Chapter Text

It’s Monday when they get a new letter

They met up with Akito and Rui for ramen that day. Mizuki actually asked them to do it on Monday.

There’s a lot of “haven’t done in a long time”s for them this month. 

They start walking to the shop and talking about their friends and if the latest book is any good before—

“Mizuki-Kun!”

The three turn around to see Toya running towards them

He’s out of breath when he arrives but he reaches his hand out to them with a letter in it.

It’s another yellow letter.

“Had to deliver this to you myself. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go now. See you guys.” He kisses Akito on the cheek and waves goodbye to them all before turning the corner

“Fufufu~ A letter?”

“Whatever it is, we’re reading it too.”

Mizuki carefully opens the letter and sees her handwriting again

Akito flinches an inch next to them as both suddenly are silence

Amia,

      You should go try to do a contest at this place called Que Sera Sera! Hanasato and Airi work there so they can help you! They’re all randomized each week, so I don’t know what it is today, sorry!

Yours, 
          Enanan

P.S I Love You

They close the letter up and hold it in their hand

“Alright. Let’s go try this place!”

“Huh?! Not this place?”

“Nope!” They smile at Akito

He knows it’s not real but damn is it annoying sometimes 

“You’re driving.” he rolls his eyes at them

“Awww pretty please?” Mizuki bats their eyes before nudging Rui to do the same

“Man fuck you.”

“You’re already doing that to Toya-Kun!” Rui laughs at Akito before he punches his side with a red face

When they arrive at the place, it’s almost crowded.

“Holy shit. Ena wants you to try this???” Akito asks with a flabbergasted face

They nod and pulls both of their hands inside the place

The group stand in the back before they’re spotted by Airi who gestures to another employee to serve the crowd

She has on a disguise as well as Haruka, with her hair tied back in a ponytail and with sunglasses and a mask. (She’s easily recognizable with her earring but Mizuki won’t tell her that.)

Mizuki shows her the letter and instantly she knows. She goes behind the counter and grabs a microphone for them. 

“H-huh?!”

“This contest is a karaoke! Between you three of course!”

“I did NOT sign up for this shit!” 

“Well this is unexpected-“

Airi ushers them to one of the soundproof room and leaves without a second to waste

It feels awkward to Rui and Akito

It feels wrong to Mizuki. 

To just sing freely again without Ena.

Mizuki musters up the courage to swipe on the screen connecting to the tv

‘…you gotta do what I say for these letters! They’re very important to me. Maybe to you too.’

“They are important to me Ena.”

Akito’s head turns at the sound of his sister’s name

“What did you say?”

“Nothing! Nothing you have to be too worried about.” Mizuki states

They pick a random song after frustration strikes them silently 

Then it shows one song on the tv screen

Charles.

“Hey, not a bad song.”

“Fufu~! This will be interesting!”

Mizuki is stuck with their microphone close to their lips 

When was the last time they listened to this song? Their words stuck in their throat. Heaviness not leaving and grasping their inner heart saying ‘Wait, don’t leave me please.’ Guilt choking and twisting their throat and heart cutting off their breath completely—

They smell Ena’s perfume from the opened letter left on the table

‘Please try. For me.’

Mizuki grasps the microphone tightly 

‘I don’t know what to do without you Ena. But I’ll try.’

Mizuki realizes along the song how funny it is.

“I want to be empty.
But someday if I'm satisfied with the deep blue,
Then I wonder - in this kind of way can I let myself be troubled?”

Akito sings that part but Mizuki thinks for a second

‘Will I be satisfied with my life without Ena?’

“Huff…Finally we’re finished.” Akito drops the mic near him on the couch and drapes his arm over his face

“That song was different from my usual. Interesting!” Rui claps shortly before glancing at the pale Mizuki

“Mizuki! You look pale! Are you alright?!” Rui puts his hand on their head 

‘I did it. I did it. I did it. I did it without her.’

Mizuki giggles and then laughs out

“Mizuki?!” 

Their tears flow down their cheeks as they laugh in the empty room

‘I did what you wanted Ena.’

Rui hugs them while Akito puts a hand on their back as they sob in their hands

‘I sang our song without you.’

After half an hour, they all came out of the room and saw that the whole place was deserted

“How the hell…? Wasn’t this place crowded as hell or something before??” Akito looks around with a confused place

“Yeah, morning rushes and then boom! Nothing! Then, another lunch rush and then finally night rush. Lots of rushes and the we get huge breaks.” Airi replies flipping her hair dramatically 

“And I still look amazing!” She laughs out

Mizuki rubs their eyes as they look at the yellow box on the counter

“Oh? What’s that Airi?”

Airi sprouts a confused face before following their finger at the box

“Oh! Lemme see the scores…” She walks to the counter and taps on the similar looking app from the karaoke room

“And the winner is…the pink microphone! she looks behind her at the three

“Damn it, it’s Mizuki.” Akito says with no bite

Minori takes the box and—

“W-whoa!” crashes into Mizuki

“I’m so sorry Akiyama!!!!” She gets up immediately and bows 

“No worries, I’m fine!” 

Minori hands them the box as they look at it with a confused smile 

“Hmm…I wonder what’s in it?”

“Open it, open it!” Rui cheers on

“Feels like Christmas again.” Akito laughs out

“We don’t know what’s in there either.” Minori states

“Huh?! You guys don’t?” They ask them

“No, but it was in my house labeled as ‘Event Gift’ so I had to bring it to work.” Airi told them

Mizuki looks at the present again and unwraps it, cutting the clear tape of the box open to reveal another yellow letter and a simple necklace with a narcissus flower.

Their eyes widen and they hear a small gasp from Airi 

They know it the second they see it

Mizuki hears the door open and shut on a rainy day

“E-na!! You’re home!” They look at the door to see Ena hitting the wall with her umbrella

“Finally! It was so rainy. But I had to get this! It’s so pretty!”

Ena takes her shoes off and goes to sit on the couch with Mizuki, cuddling right next to them.

She takes a small box out of the bag

“Oh? What’s that?” Mizuki asked as the movie on the screen was forgotten

“I saw it on the jewelry window and I had to get it! I had some spare money from Christmas shopping but this, is my Christmas present from myself!” she smiles at Mizuki before opening it to reveal a necklace with a narcissus flower in the middle with two tiny flowers symmetrical with each other

“It’s my favorite flower, the narcissus flower. It means creativity and something else but isn’t it so pretty Miz?!” She shows off the box with the silver colored necklace

Mizuki nods before kissing her cheek

“Definitely Ena, it’s pretty.”

“Can you help me put it on?”

Mizuki nods and takes the necklace while Ena turns around 

They brush her soft brow hair to the side as Ena takes it away. Unclasping the hook, they softly swing the necklace around her neck and clasp it back together 

“Done.”

Ena turns around and grabs her phone from her pocket, tapping the camera app

“Oh my gosh…it’s so pretty…Meiko, what do you think?”

Ena places her phone flat in her hand as she leans against Mizuki’s chest more

“It’s pretty.”

“Let’s make some bracelets and necklaces when we all get to the Sekai again why don’t we? I have the materials for it!” Ena excitedly says

“I’ll tell Miku. Len’s too busy hiding behind Kaito because of Rin.”

“Of course he is, he’s been attached to Miku when he first came here. Then when Kaito came, he was pretty happy since Miku can’t keep hiding him. Pretty close friends. But you know, you two should really try to stop imtimidating him!” Mizuki scolds

“I’m aware. Kaito has already reprimanded us. He has told Rin and I off already.” 

“Hell yeah! Girlboss!!!” Mizuki exclaims while Ena laughs

“We’ll talk to you later Meiko, bye!!!” Ena waves the the hologram before she promptly waved and disappeared 

Ena touches her necklace and smiles

“Remember the dress I made back in high school?”

“Yeah, bunch of these flowers on them. You really like them don’t you?”

Ena nods as Mizuki drapes the blanket over her and themselves

“So, what were you watching without me?”

A scream pierces the room as Ena flinches and grabs onto Mizuki

“A horror movie”

“You asshole!” She grabs a pillow and tries to suffocate them

Mizuki laughs as Ena huffs

‘That was when we were still dating.’

Mizuki blinks at the necklace in their palm and glances at their ring

“It’s Ena’s necklace…” they mutter

“She must’ve put the box in my house.” Airi laughs a bit before wiping away tears in her eyes. “That’s Ena for you if she knows who wins.” she smiles

“The letter! Open the letter!” Minori cheers on

The four look at them expectantly, they sigh out before setting the box down on a nearby table and opening the letter

Amia,
     
         Hahaha! I hope you won! If not it sure will be awkward… But I’m sure you did! Hope Airi managed to get the box to her work. So many hoping! I just really want this letter and present for you. I remember the fact that I told Mei that we would come in and make bracelets with them. I hope that you still will make it with them. This necklace, I want you to keep it. I know how much you loved it.

‘I still do Ena.’

But, I want you to take all of my stuff and give it away. Make some room in the house for yourself! I know half of my stuff is crowding the house. Clean our room, clear the sewing space I had, I’m sure Kanade would appreciate the sewing machine. Please Mizuki. You can keep some things but please, throw my things away. Make space for yourself. I love you to the moon and back. 

Forever yours, 
                        Enanan
P.S I Love You

Mizuki’s eyes soften at the letter as they wipe away the tears threatening to escape their eyes

“She really wants me to clean the house.” They laugh out

Mizuki looks at Airi and Minori 

“Thank you for keeping this safe.”

“If anything, we only did what she wanted.” Airi smiled 

“It’s too sad for this time of day right now!” Minori runs and hugs Mizuki with tears in her eyes

Mizuki reciprocates it as they feel Rui’s arms as well

“Thank you, you two. Cmon, the rush is starting soon. Won’t you drive me Akito?”

Akito rolls his eyes, wiping them as if he weren’t nearly in tears beforehand

“Why do I always have to drive…”

The three wave goodbye to the girls before making their way to the car

“Will you two wait a bit? I have to use the restroom.” Rui tells them before Akito waves his hand off sitting on the black car

Mizuki takes the necklace out of their pocket 

‘It’s my favorite flower, the narcissus flower. It means creativity and something else but isn’t it so pretty Miz?!’

“Narcissus flower. It means hope and ‘the only one’.” Akito mumbles out

“It also means creativity, doesn’t it?” 

He nods at their words

“It was Ena’s favorite flower. It suited her well.” He smiles unknowingly 

They remember him giving a bouquet of them at her grave. 

‘Are you happy even though she’s dead?’

“You think she’d be happy with me wearing this?” They swallow their question in favor of not seeing Akito break down in tears

“I don’t see why not, she gave it to you with a full out letter right?” 

‘This necklace, I want you to keep it. I know how much you loved it.’

“Yeah. I guess.” They dangle the necklace in front of them

“Hey, could you help me put this on?” 

Akito hesitates for a second before nodding

They give the silver chain to him before standing in front of the car. He unhooks the necklace and carefully puts it on for them. Mizuki puts their hand on their collarbone and rubs it slightly while looking away as they feel tears in their eyes. They sit on the car with Akito

“Thanks.” 

He nods and looks at the necklace, he stares absentmindedly at it and nothing else

“I don’t know what to do without her you know?” He explained

“I know that you’re struggling too. It’s…clear. Ena’s gone. She was who you loved.”

Mizuki huffs 

“Yeah. Just imagine losing Toya. I’m not saying losing your sister is any better but, imagine losing him. The only one who…who really understood you.”

His hands shake as he holds his breath. Mizuki couldn’t help but notice how similar they looked at that moment

“I never said you had to talk about it or do anything but, I’ll be here to listen. No need to say anything at all. Okay?”

Mizuki smiles at that 

‘You don’t need to help me.’

“Ok.” 

“I’m back! Apologies!” Rui waves to them

They go in the car and drive Mizuki home first

“You sure you don’t need me to sleep over Mizu?”

“I’m fine Rui, I got some cleaning to do but I’ll be ok.” Mizuki waves at the two and locks the door.

When Mizuki eats some instant ramen before throwing it in the trash. They look over to the unwashed dishes 

Mizuki groans. “Damn it. I forgot about these.”

They go over to the sink and begins to wash the plates

‘You missed a spot.’

Mizuki looks over again at the plate and sees a speck of brown. They scrub at it 

“You always know where the damn spots are. I left the dish washing to you for that reason.” 

‘Yeah, you still ended up helping me dry them.’

“I did, didn’t I?”

“Why did you leave?”

‘I had to.’

“Why…why you?”

‘That’s what happened. I can’t change it.’

Mizuki grips tighter on the plate as it makes an unbearable squeaking sound before they roughly rub at it with water

“You should’ve stayed. You should’ve stayed.”

‘I don’t really have a choice in this, do I?’

Their tears well up in their eyes before they’re released onto the white porcelain plates

‘Please don’t cry because of me for too long.’

“I can’t promise that Ena.”

When Mizuki shuts the faucet and begins to dry the dishes they hear her speak again

‘Don’t forget to clean our room ok?’

“I will, I will.”

‘P.S I love you.’

Mizuki turns around and sees nothing but their phone on the island table. It lights up with a message from Kanade but they can’t reach the table anymore. They clutch the rag to their heart before their tears fall on the wooden floor, themselves with them.

‘Please come back Ena. I love you.’

Chapter Text

Hi everyone! My apologies for being so incredibly late. I had an emergency the day after Christmas. A very dire emergency. I’m so sorry for those who have been waiting but I’m currently working on the next chapter!

Thank you for your patience my dear readers!

Be prepared to see Mafuyu and Kanade make a bigger appearance in the next few chapters…

Chapter Text

Mizuki’s cleaning the bedroom when they accidentally hit the closet with their arm and something bonks their head

“OWW!! Ena! Did you have to put everything high when you’re literally short?!”

They look at the item that dropped below

It’s small jewelery box filled to the brim with necklaces and rings that no longer fit Ena. They remember that Ena got upset over her favorite ring not being able to fit her anymore.

Opening it carefully, Mizuki sees the ring again. 

‘I’m glad…that you aren’t here to see me throw this away Ena. You’d yell at me wouldn’t you?’

They sigh before leaving the box on the table next to them. 

Stifling through the yards and yards of fabric, putting them away and pulling some out to check if it’s dusty…Mizuki wonders how the hell Ena managed to find anything!

They managed to get everything into four huge white bags. Instead of throwing them, Mizuki thought to donate them instead seeing how much fabric was left over. It’d be a waste no? 

They sit on Ena’s side of the bed and lays down, legs still on the side. 

“Awahhh…Im exhuasted!” They exclaim and then looks on the bedside table for their phone

There’s a picture of Ena and Mizuki on their mini honeymoon trip to Okinawa. They weren’t for going far away from home but Ena wanted to be somewhere pretty so they went to the beach! Mizuki bitterly smiled at the picture before they turn the photo down

‘Sorry Enanan.’

They open the drawer beneath it to see if anything had accmulated dust or if there’s anything of Ena’s inside before they see a pale yellow letter.

Widening their eyes and making their heart beat higher than ever today, Mizuki curiously takes the letter and opens it with the gentlest touch. 

Amia,

         Hi! My drawer is all over the place isn’t it? I’m not mad that you’re going to take my stuff out but I’m pretty happy that you’re cleaning. You know that we BOTH never cleaned the house unless we had to. (Force of habit you think ><?) There’s 2 more letters inside, one is purple, one is dark pink. Purple is for Yuki, pink for K. I want you to go have a small three day trip with them alright? To where you may ask?

‘Oh no. Please not—‘

Okinawa! It’s a small break for everyone. I know they work way too hard. Glad Yuki cut off her parents when she graduated. (So wasn’t happy with the fact that she stole Hinomori-San’s number and spammed her about Yuki!) 

Remember, do what makes you happy on this trip and relax. The world can wait for more music later.

Yours forever,
                       Enanan
P.S I Love You.

Mizuki visibly groans.

“Dammit Ena. A vacation now?”

“V-vacation?! To…to Okinawa?!” 

Mizuki nods at the shocked Kanade who has the letter in her hand

“Yup. Ena even paid for the tickets so they have to be used by the end of this month which isn’t far.”

Mafuyu swipes on her phone. “I don’t have anything to do besides the synth or singing. I’m free for it if Kanade is going.”

Kanade nods as well at her words and smiles at Mafuyu.

A tiny part of Mizuki’s heart burns and screams in agony.

“The beaches there are great, pack some beachwear and some sunscreen. Cute clothes too of course!”

Mafuyu and Kanade can detect the false cheery accent in their voice. They don’t tell them but Mizuki knows better.

“Well, make sure to pack clean clothes and things you might need alright?”

“Will do Mafumafu.” 

The waiter comes by with their food and they put the conversation into the back of their head opting to return to it later on in the day

‘…did I do laundry after I washed the dishes last time..?’

Mizuki picks out fresh warm clothes from the dryer and puts it straight in their luggage. The light pink luggage with imprints of bows and all sorts of cutesy stuff was why it was Mizuki’s favorite luggage. 

They used to use it for all types of traveling stuff with Ena. It was practically their second purse. It was made for them. 

Made for them..

Mizuki thinks back to their last trip together which was in Shibuya with the whole Nightcord at 25:00 group. They had definitely taken a bunch of pictures. Bunch.

Mizuki remembers the photos in the unopened photobook. When did they…

No time to think about that, Mizuki had to pack for the trip afterall.

‘Really pushing the boundaries of your feelings away aren’t you?’

“You’re not even here, bug off.” They said annoyed

‘Why so mean all of a sudden?’

Mizuki grips on their suitcase tighter

“You aren’t real, you’re only there for me to fucking cope.”

‘Isn’t coping good?’

“No…not this way.”

(I don’t deserve to see you again. I don’t wanna forget you and move on.)

‘It’s ok to look at me.’

“NO! If I see you, you go away…I don’t…”

‘…Mizuki…I—‘

Their phone buzzes and Mizuki looks back startled.

They grab their phone and look around the room

“Ena?”

But nobody came.

Yuki: Hey, packed up ready for our trip.

Amia: OK!!!!! I’m ready too!!!

Yuki: Amia, I’m driving 

Amia: Huh?! Why???? 

It’s going to be a long drive nite is gonna be bad if u drive

Yuki: I have my glasses, besides you’re a reckless driver and Kanade can barely see the signs. 

When I mean reckless, I mean you almost got the whole WXS troupe traumatized. 

Amia: Alr that was 1 time;;;

Yuki: You managed to get the troupe, VBS, our idol friends, and Mochizuki-chan’s band traumatized from driving.

Amia: VBS? Akito’s just being a cowarddddd

Yuki: You made Shirashi throw up

Amia: ….

Yuki: I don’t even understand how Tenma-chan’s health didn’t just drop when she got in the car with you.

Amia: OK OK STOP I GET IT

You can drive but lemme drive when u get tired

Yuki: k, got it

See you at 04

Amia: See you!!!!!

Mizuki has the whole backseat to themselves, well half of it. Half was covered with Mafuyu and Kanade’s bags but, Mizuki didn’t mind.

They’re listening to a playlist filled with their music when an instrumental comes on and they hear the small laughter of Kanade

They slyly take off one of their headphones and listens in

“…It’s been a long time since we all went on a trip with each other haven’t we?”

“It has, but you’re busy composing and I’m busy trying to figure out composition. Mizuki is thinking about vocals and dividing them between…all of us.”

“It’s quite sweet. Do you think we should buy some cake later?”

“We should get your favorite then. The confetti one?”

“Yes…that would be nice. Let’s ask Mizuki what they want later and we can all get it in case they don’t like it.”

A laugh comes from Kanade’s side of the car 

“You’re so sweet Mafu.”

“….” Mizuki presumes that Mafuyu was blushing from her silence.

They put their earbud back in and look out the window. 

‘You’re jealous aren’t you~?’ Mizuki’s reflection smiles viciously at them, grinning like Cheshire Cat. But unlike the cat, it’s smile was laced with venom.

No I’m not.

But they could feel something crawling its way to their heart. Something deep down that wanted something else than the happiness and happiness of others. That want more from the people surrounding them.
The feeling makes them feel sad. It doesn’t seem right. It’s wrong. 

‘Yes you are.’

Shut up.

‘Jealous of your friends? How pathetic can you be?’

I’m not jealous

‘Yes you are. Jealous of what you can never have again…how funny.’

Enough.

‘Oh don’t shut out the truth. I’m you. We’re jealous of everyone.’

No. I. Am. Not.

‘Rui…just like you but he has a prince of his own.’

Stop.

‘Akito, with his beloved right there next to him unlike you…’

No.

‘Mafuyu and Kanade with hearts intertwined…’

STOP!

‘Even An. With her brillant and fearless girlfriend. Jealousy jealousy…can’t we just admit it?’

SHUT UP!

Mizuki bonks their head against the car window startling Kanade

“Mizuki-Kun?! Are you ok?!” She turns around and asks while Mafuyu side eyes them as well.

“Uh- I’m completely fine! Just…just hit my head is all! Hahahaha!” They awkwardly laugh as Kanade worriedly looks at them and turns back around

They look out the window again to see if their reflection is gone

“MMMMhpH!” Mizuki stretches as they meet their first stop before going to the beach house.

“Wow…The beach is beautiful…”

Kanade looks afar into the ocean with Mafuyu who seems to be amazed

Mizuki snaps a photo of them on the camera before putting it down on the car

“I’ll be right back!”

“Be careful.” Mafuyu states 

“I will!!!”

Mizuki runs to the rocky part of the handrail, where big rocks were. Many people were there, presumably doing the same thing as themself. Turning over every rock they finally find it

NA♡IA

‘Enanan loves Amia…’

People have walked to the upper part now, leaving them in the shade.

The rock in their heart are greater than the one in their hands.

Mizuki slowly tears their heart apart, piece by piece when they see Kanade and Mafuyu snuggling up next to each other in the sun. They stay in the shade on the hood of the car and watch them.
 

Mizuki digs their nails inside of their forearms looking at their friends. They can’t hear them, they know that. Mizuki looks at their phone camera 

“Maybe it’s just this moment.”

Oh really?

They almost drop their phone but quickly picks up on their reflection again

“Bugger off.”

The moment in the car? Was that a one time thing too? 

“Yes! No? I don’t know!” They whisper shout at the eerie reflection 

Accept it. 

Mizuki turns their phone off and look at them again

They remember something they heard once from a generic show they were watching with Ena.

“Jealousy often comes and goes, doesn’t it?”

The other characters talk back but, they don’t listen to the rest. They remember everything was fuzzy until Ena pressed her weight against them.

“That movie was…bor-ing~!” Ena sings out annoyed

“Man and we paid like 20 bucks for this?!” Ena rages at the box

They snap back to reality and laugh at her

“Aw~ I thought it was kinda good!” 

“Lies! All lies!”

‘How did it end?’ Mizuki thought