Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Secrets are hard to keep. Hard enough, especially when they are owned. Making a person vulnerable, hanging like a burden and dragging lower and lower, aiming for the bottom. Too heavy to be carried alone.

But could it really help to share a secret with another? It would require trust. A mutual consent between both insiders to become connected by an invisible bond, forged once the secret is spoken. Otherwise, it could become dangerous. Impossible to be done without one person trusting the other. Trusting them enough to be sure that, when a need occurs, they will be the one to rely on.

Secrets are kept for various reasons. Often out of personal fear, as a way to cope with potential danger the keeper could be exposed to once the secret is shared. Becoming the subject of social ridicule only because something doesn’t meet the world’s expectations. Exposing themselves and other people to the spotlight and making them vulnerable simply because of the acquired knowledge. Risking to lose more than to gain.

A secret can be a burden, a threat. A black hole lurking in the shadow, ready to swallow everyone who dares to come too close. A responsibility tying together those who are involved. It can be power, a way to control. Knowledge so potent that people would fight for it to be revealed. It has always been something people fought for. But the more power one person possesses, the more people will be hungry to steal it back, for themselves. That’s when a secret becomes a responsibility—and sharing it becomes a decision of how much one is ready to risk for the simple pleasure of not being alone.

But how much can a person bear alone without eventually falling apart?

In Yang Jeongin’s life, there were only two secrets that really had meaning.

The day it had happened was just as normal as any other. It had been in the second class of high school, when he was finally getting a grasp of his life. After teaming up with one of his best friends, Kim Seungmin, they had won the school scientific competition, gaining an opportunity to participate in the national tournament held in Seoul. Not that there were many people in their school to compete against—let’s be honest, most of the kids couldn’t care less about wasting their precious free time for Physics and Chemistry.

That day, with Seungmin leading them to victory, their whole school team had been invited to visit the largest technological company in South Korea. They got a chance to see some of the most important inventions of the modern world, and to visit the most advanced laboratories. It seemed like a dream come true—until Jeongin got back home the next day, back to the city of Busan.

He had woken up with a throbbing headache and when he opened his eyes, he almost fell off his bed. He reached for his glasses but threw them away as soon as they landed on his nose, unable to bear the sudden clarity of his vision. All the edges appeared sharp as knives, enabling him to spot so many little details that his mind was barely able to comprehend them all. A second later, he almost lost his balance as all the sounds reverberated in his ears, louder and clearer than ever before. The moment he heard water dripping from the bathroom tap, he thought he was going crazy. And it became even worse when he walked there to check it—his attempt to turn the water off ended up with him ripping the tap off the sink.

First, Jeongin was scared. He had no idea what was happening to his body. Memories from his trip to Seoul were coming in and out of his head, hitting him like meteors. It was only his luck that it all had happened on the weekend, otherwise he would be doomed. Trying to hide his sudden condition from his aunt, he ran all the way to the library, fortunately open for visitors on Saturdays. He plopped by the desk in the most remote corner of the building and searched the whole Internet for the answers, with his head hidden under the hood of his hoodie. But when he landed on the website of the technological company, everything became crystal clear.

He remembered it well. The painful sting in his arm that had caused him to look down and brush off a small spider when they had been walking around the laboratories. Back then, he hadn’t paid it much attention—it was just a small spider, not even the poisonous one, so what harm could it have done? Jeongin had never been one to panic about small insects. But the more he read about it, the more it made sense. The technological company, the unbelievable, innovative experiments carried out there, and then his symptoms—heightened senses, sudden flexibility, incomprehensible strength. Soon, it all became clear as a day. The only problem was that it was too dangerous for anyone close to him to ever get to know about it. And the more time passed, the more Jeongin grew aware of it.

The city of Busan had fallen in love with the new superhero as soon as he appeared. Obviously, not everyone, but most of the citizens were simply grateful for his presence, for the amount of peace and safety he had brought to their daily life. It had come along with multiple sacrifices, but once Jeongin had established his position as the superhero of the city, it had become the new purpose of his life.

They called him Spider-Man.

And there was nobody but him that knew who he was under his mask.

And without the mask, Jeongin was nobody else but a simple teenager, just like many others. But as a teenager, he had some secrets, too.

This one felt more personal—and a little silly. It came in the form of a boy, or rather, the deep yearning attached to him. It was a secret safe enough to share with friends, yet too personal and delicate to be truly spoken aloud. No matter how shy he was about it, it was an easy one for his best friends to notice; Jeongin’s expression gave it away every time he looked at him.

His name was Lee Felix and he had been occupying Jeongin’s mind since the very first moment they had spoken for the first time. He was the most gorgeous person Jeongin had ever seen. His cute face scattered with a bunch of freckles all over his cheeks and small nose. His smile able to summon sunlight and brighten up the whole world. And those sparkles of kindness and concern shining in his eyes when they had talked for the first time—now unable to leave Jeongin’s mind. Since that day, it had become Jeongin's dream for those eyes to look at him again.

“You’re drooling.”

Jeongin darted his eyes away from the blond boy who was currently occupied with hanging a huge banner on the cafeteria’s wall, and turned to his friends. They were both looking at him with pity, Seungmin with a grimace even. As they had been aware of his crush on the school president for a long time now, it was becoming harder and harder for them to keep witnessing the growing misery of their best friend, who was still unable to take matters into his own hands.

“No, I’m not,” Jeongin protested, but wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his blue hoodie, just in case.

“Of course, you are. It’s a natural response of your salivary glands to the process of chewing food. I’m just stating a fact.” Seungmin shrugged.

“Rather a natural response to checking your crush out.” Jisung, who was sitting on the opposite side of the table, winked mischievously at Jeongin.

“I’m not checking anybody out,” the boy mumbled and looked down at his tray, mindlessly picking at his bibimbap with his chopsticks. Of course he had been staring at Felix, no shit Sherlock, but there was no way he would openly admit it to these two. They were teasing him enough, already.

“Of course, you’re not. And I’m Spider-Man.” Jisung rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, look at him go,” Seungmin planted a hand on Jisung’s bicep and squeezed it. “He’s as much of a Spider-Man, as you’re not hopelessly pining after the school president.”

Jeongin furrowed his forehead in a protest. “I’m not pining! I’m just… appreciating.”

Jisung rolled his eyes. “God, you’re so boring.”

Jeongin tilted his head in disbelief. “Oh, I’m boring? As if you weren’t becoming a stuttering mess every time Minho is nearby.”

“Well, in fact, you both are just equally miserable,” Seungmin stated.

Jeongin decided to ignore that and dug his chopsticks into his bowl of bibimbap. His attention eventually drifted back to Felix, who was now laughing along with Jisu, another member of the school council, as they were admiring their work on the cafeteria’s wall. There was a huge, colorful banner announcing the school’s biggest event of the semester—the summer dance party. Some of the other students were looking in that direction too, checking out both the banner and the two students taking care of it. That was what made Jeongin’s staring so easy and painful at the same time—it simply drowned among all the other stares, as Lee Felix was like a magnet for attention. He attracted it almost effortlessly, with that bright smile of his and with the never-ending charisma. Jeongin just happened to be yet another person to notice, but there was no way for him to ever reach the boy’s league.

He could still keep dreaming, though.

“Are you going to invite him to the Summer Party?” Jisung asked, propping his chin on his intertwined fingers.

“What!?” Jeongin opened his eyes wide, cheeks flushing red.

“He asked if you’re going to invite Felix to the Summer Party,” Seungmin repeated casually, while opening his cup of chocolate pudding.

“No, of course not. Why would you even think about it?” Jeongin shook his head immediately, but he avoided the evaluating stares of his friends, who looked like they were trying to stir a passage into his brain.

 “And here goes your bullshit again. Can you finally stop pretending like you’re not totally head over heels for him? I have a crush, too, but at least I’m not hiding it,” Jisung stated, sounding almost conceitedly.

“And yet you still have done nothing about it,” Jeongin replied back.

While Jeongin was just admiring Felix from afar, his best friend was on another level of dreadful pining. He and Minho somehow kept getting chances to talk almost all the time in class, for some reason ending up paired in every group project or playing in the same team on PE lessons. And yet, it was never enough for Jisung to put his shit together. But Jeongin understood him very well—his own knees got weak around Felix, too.

“I think you should invite him,” Jisung said after a moment.

Seungmin lifted his head up with a huge grin. “I agree! It would be so much fun to watch.”

Jeongin cast him a glare. “You’re an asshole sometimes, you know that?”

Seungmin’s grin stretched even wider. “And you love me for it.”

Jeongin got quiet for a moment, pondering over the idea. In fact, he wasn’t completely opposed to it, and if he had to be truly honest, it had even crossed his mind briefly once or twice. He just never spared it much attention, convinced that it was a dream too far from his reach.

It was almost ironic to notice how easy it was to fight and tease bad guys on the streets of Busan in comparison to talking to a cute boy. Just the sole thought of confronting Felix was making his stomach tie into a tight knot. There was no way for him to approach the boy without stumbling over his own feet and making a fool of himself, not to even mention inviting him to a school dance.

If only he could maintain his Spider-Man persona without his suit. When he put his mask on, everything always became so easy. It didn't matter what other people thought of him and he was able to casually joke around and talk to basically anyone. He didn't care because people didn't care either. He could make a fool of himself and they would still like him. Some of them thought of him as a superhero, others recognized him as the funny guy from YouTube videos. Whatever they thought of him, it didn't matter, because in the end, he always remained their ‘Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man’ who kept an eye on the city and its citizens, always appearing whenever they needed him.

Without his suit, however, he was just… Jeongin. Contrary to Spider-Man, Jeongin was neither a superhero nor a YouTube star. He was just another teenager, another miserable kid trying to figure out his place in this crazy world. Jeongin was shy, boring, and clumsy and there was no way for him to just hit on his crush out of nowhere and ask him out. Honestly, he would rather swing out through a window and run away to fight bad guys on the street. Anything but confronting the boy he liked.

He bit his lip in wonder. “Do you guys think I could do it?”

“I hope you can,” Jisung responded. “If you can’t do it, then how could I?”

“You guys are so annoying.” Seungmin rolled his eyes.

Jisung glared at him while wrapping his arm around Jeongin and pulling him closer. “We’re just romantics, something you won’t understand.” At that, Jeongin grimaced and tried to push the boy away.

But Seungmin didn’t seem offended, quite the contrary, as he tilted his head and raised an eyebrow with a teasing grin. “Oh, yeah? Or maybe you two are just losers.”

Jisung let go of his friend and lurched forward, pointing at Seungmin an accusative finger. “If we’re losers, then so are you!”

Seungmin shrugged. “I never said I wasn’t.”

They continued with eating, Jeongin’s bowl being now almost empty. He kept digging in it nonetheless, making sure that not even a single crumb would go to waste. As for a high school, their cafeteria served astonishingly delicious food. 

Meanwhile his friend next to him seemed to be interested in something different than food, in fact not bothered about eating at all anymore. Jeongin looked at him, curious, and then followed his gaze, staring at the other side of the cafeteria. He wasn’t surprised when he saw the table occupied by Minho and his other friends, now joined also by Felix, who was finally done with putting on the decorations.

“Someday, I will tell him,” said Jisung. He must have felt Jeongin’s attention.

Jeongin just patted his arm in support.

“When I’m listening to you two talking, sometimes I want to go and tell those guys myself,” Seungmin chimed in with an amused shake of his head. “Honestly, I could do it right away.”

Jisung grimaced. “Please, don’t.”

The sound of a ringing bell filled the cafeteria, making the three of them flinch.

“God, I hate this thing,” Jisung mumbled and closed his lunch box. The three of them groaned and started to get up lazily, none of them really excited for the next lesson. “By the way, I forgot to ask, but are you guys free after classes? I thought we could finally go see that new Lego store in the city.”

Jeongin felt a pang of guilt in his chest, as he looked at him apologetically. “I can’t, I’m sorry.”

Jisung groaned and looked at him incredulously. “Ahh, not again!? You never have time for us. What are you even doing?”

He shrugged his arms, avoiding his friends’ scrutinizing gazes. “You know, just… helping my aunt.”

He could see it from their faces that they didn’t believe him at all. They had heard that excuse far too many times to do so. Nonetheless, they had learned a long time ago not to question Jeongin’s ridiculous justifications for his constant absences. Even if they had been quite worried about him at first, they had eventually decided to trust him and accept his weird behavior. 

Jeongin absolutely despised that constant necessity of lying to his friends all the time, but it was the only way he could keep them safe. He could never allow them to know the real reason why he couldn’t meet after school. He knew that it would make them both excited and even more worried, and he could not let them get into any trouble on that account. Most people didn’t even realize how dangerous it was to be a superhero. Even Jeongin had to learn his lessons, and now that he’d learned them, he knew that keeping his identity secret was one of the most important things for him to do. And not only for the safety of himself, but for the safety of his loved ones, too. So no matter how hard it was to deal with it all alone, he couldn't risk anyone's safety just for his own comfort.

For that reason, it was better if he kept Yang Jeongin and Spider-Man separated.

𒌐

No matter how much trouble came along with his secret identity, once Jeongin had started, there was no way he could stop.

There was nothing like the thrill of flying from one building to the other, of being able to move around the city faster than all the cars beneath him. After all those months, it had become so natural to him to swing around the city so fast that he could hear the roaring of the wind almost tearing his ears. But he loved that feeling, the feeling of complete freedom and recklessness. A huge contrast to his usual behavior when his feet had to stay firm on the ground.

And moreover, an afternoon patrol in Busan could never be boring.

The second most inhabited city of South Korea never lacked threats lurking around the corners, waiting for innocent citizens. No matter if it was about dangerous criminals or little kittens that got stuck on trees, Spider-Man never disdained any kind of problems and always tried his best to help everyone in need. It was what kept him going, it was the reason he allowed himself to push aside everything else in his life. Because he knew that there was nobody like him in this city, and therefore he was obliged to be around for the others.

Today nothing huge really happened. Sure, he had to catch a few pick-pockets on his way throughout the city but that was almost like an established routine of a daily patrol. The most adrenaline-pumping moment occurred when he had to save a construction worker from falling off a scaffolding. Although his reflexes were beyond human reach, it wasn’t always enough to save him from scratches, and so it wasn’t today, as he ended up with an ugly cut on his arm. But he didn’t care, knowing that it was going to heal in a matter of a few days.

When he finally managed to control and swing around the whole city, the sun had already started to hide behind the horizon. Even his stomach began craving for attention, so Jeongin took it as a perfect moment to take a break and keep an eye on the city from above. After buying a sandwich at one of his favorite local bars—which the seller wanted to give him for free but the superhero flatly refused—Jeongin rested on top of the building situated by one of the most crowded streets in the neighborhood. From the rooftop, he had a perfect view of the area without attracting any unnecessary attention.

He unpacked the sandwich and took a huge bite while taking a look around. Fortunately, nothing special was happening. There were mostly people chatting lively with their friends and heading towards different bars and restaurants, or just people minding their own business in general, without any sign of danger around them. 

Using the moment of peace, he took his phone out to message his aunt that he was all right. The woman, just like his friends, had no idea where her nephew vanished every afternoon. Obviously, in the beginning she had tried to discover the reason behind his weird behavior but when all of her trials turned out to be ineffective, she had eventually let go. She had only made him promise to text her and let her know he was safe—it was the only way that could keep her at least a little bit less worried. Jeongin knew that she would totally freak out if she ever uncovered the truth, so he always made sure to fulfill the duty to keep his aunt away from worries. He was grateful for her trust, though, because he knew how hard it must have been for her to realize that there was something he didn’t want to share with her.

When the message was sent, a familiar tingle suddenly flew through his body—his spider-tingle, which usually foreshadowed nothing else but trouble.

He lifted his head and scanned the street beneath him carefully. His gaze stopped on a blond-haired person running as fast as if their life depended on it. Jeongin squinted his eyes and leaned forward, ready to get into action, but he didn't see anything suspicious. There was nobody chasing them, nothing that could pose a potential threat.

 Only after another second he noticed it—a loose shoelace on one of their shoes.

Jeongin shook his head and tucked his phone into the pocket of his suit, together with the package left after his sandwich, before shooting his web out and swinging down the building. He landed in front of the runner, ready to remind them about the importance of keeping their shoelaces tied—but what he didn’t expect was for the person to bump into him at full speed a moment later, knocking them both down to the ground.

The last thing Jeongin expected to see once he opened his eyes was the face of nobody else but Lee Felix, staring at him with wide eyes and with face flushing all red, as he tried to scramble back to his feet.

“S-spider-Man! Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” In a hurry, he started clumsily getting up, accidentally shoving his elbow into Jeongin’s ribs in the process. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you, I– What– What are you doing here?”

Jeongin got up from the ground as well, brushing the dust off his suit. Although he was surprised to see Felix like this outside of school, he couldn't let it show. Not as Spider-Man.

“I’ve just saved you from knocking your teeth out. Haven’t you seen the ‘no running with untied shoes’ sign?” he asked, shaking his head with disapproval.

Felix furrowed his eyebrows. “There is such a sign?”

“Of course, not! But obviously, there should be one!” Spider-Man responded dramatically. 

The shorter boy chuckled and Jeongin was more than glad he had his suit on, because otherwise, he would have probably burst into flames. Fortunately, the only red thing his crush could see was the red spandex so, even if Jeongin's cheeks were all red by now, he still could pretend to be resistant to Felix's charming smile. But even if he knew that the boy wouldn’t recognize him, it was hard to play pretend.

He cleared his throat. “You really shouldn’t be running with untied shoelaces. It’s like asking for an accident.”

“Ah, right, alright, you’re right.” The boy quickly squatted down to tie his shoe and Jeongin thought he had never seen the boy so abashed before. Usually, he was the one to stutter and blush in front of Lee Felix, not the other way around. He must admit it was a very unusual experience to switch parts all of a sudden.

“Anyway, where were you running so fast? Did something happen?” Spider-Man asked when the boy straightened himself back up. He had just witnessed him running for his life, and he couldn’t just leave that unquestioned.

Felix scratched his forearm unevenly. “I’m all right, just on my way to work. But thank you for asking. It really would be a shame if I knocked my teeth out just because of a stupid shoelace.” He smiled and shook his head.

Jeongin was surprised at the information. He had no idea that Felix had a job after school. Sure, some people in high school did that. But their school was one of the most demanding ones in the city, with the main purpose of raising future geniuses. There was very little time to accommodate getting good grades with a part-time job without straining oneself. Jeongin was more than familiar with it.

His eyebrows furrowed under his mask. “To work? But you’re… so young! Don’t you have school tomorrow?”

The boy waved his hand dismissively. “I’m not that young! And it's nothing bad, only a couple of hours. I can handle it.”

Jeongin wasn't sure if it was only a couple of hours but he would be a hypocrite if he blamed him. After all, he was just the same, staying up till midnight and trying to take care of both school and superhero duties.

“Besides, what about you? You don’t sound very old yourself.” Felix smiled, this time more confidently, and crossed his arms on his chest.

Spider-Man opened his eyes wide and took a step back, raising his arms in defense.

“What, why would you say so?” He tried lowering his voice, but the effort only made Felix’s smirk widen. “I sound like a man. Mature, you know. Definitely.” He cleared his throat.

“All right, mister old man.” Felix chuckled and adjusted the tote bag on his arm. “Anyway, I should get going. My boss will totally kill me if I’m late.”

He took a step forward but then hesitated and looked at the superhero once again, his smile becoming more sincere this time. Jeongin could even see the sparks that he adored so much appearing in his eyes. 

“And thanks for saving me, Spider-Man. I wouldn’t like to get my teeth knocked out.”

Then he bowed and walked away with a smile, leaving the stunned superhero behind.

Jeongin watched the boy walk away until he disappeared in one of the restaurants a few meters away. A heat wave rushed under his skin as the image of that beautiful smile flashed in his mind. That short conversation had made him so giddy he wanted to jump.

Only after a moment did he come to his senses, when a passing halmeoni grumbled at him for standing in the middle of the pavement. He promptly apologized and helped the woman to carry her groceries before finally swinging back up to the nearest rooftop to run away from the curious glances of people around. His presence on the streets usually attracted attention wherever he went.

After another hour of patrolling the city, he finally decided to get back home, as there was nothing big really happening. Also, he wasn’t feeling as excited about it anymore, unable to focus after the unexpected encounter. It had crossed his mind whether he should stay there and wait until Felix finished his shift, but the idea left his head as soon as it appeared. There were many reasons for which it was a bad idea, and besides that, he still had some homework to take care of. Also, the ugly wound that he had got on his arm after saving a construction worker from falling off a scaffolding was not going to take care of itself.

As he was swinging back home, his thoughts couldn't stop circulating around Felix. He was feeling sorry for him. The restaurant he worked at was one of the most popular in the area so he probably never had a moment of peace there. But it wasn't his only concern. Jeongin knew very well how hard it was to combine work with school, as their teachers always made sure to keep them busy with homework. Maybe it wouldn't be a problem if the boy worked only in the afternoons but so late at night? He must be exhausted.

Jeongin didn’t want to sound like a hypocrite—after all, he was the one swinging around the whole Busan whenever he was free, very often ditching not only his other responsibilities but also his friends, But at least he was able to catch up with school at night. As Spider-Man, he didn't need as much sleep as a normal person and he didn't get tired so fast. There had been a few times when he stayed up for almost three days and he was still able to do whatever he had to do without too much trouble. Actually, it was one of his favorite things connected with being Spider-Man—the amount of extra time that came along with his superpowers was unimaginable.

Nonetheless, as far as he knew, Lee Felix was just a teenager, without any superhuman abilities. Jeongin couldn’t believe how the boy was able to stay up for so long and then still keep the pretty smile on his face.

When he got back home, Aunt Sohee was already asleep. Jeongin quietly crawled into his bedroom through the window and quickly changed into his pajamas. Before doing his homework, he made sure to check if he hadn’t run out of his web fluid yet. There were only two filled cartridges left, hidden at the bottom of his wardrobe, so it seemed like he needed to make some more soon. He was glad he had a Chemistry lesson tomorrow—the school lab was a perfect place to make web fluid without much effort.

Satisfied, he hid the Spider-Man suit at the bottom of his school backpack and finally took out his notebooks. However, when he tried to focus on studying, Lee Felix was still on his mind.

Chapter Text

Being the school president could be really exhausting, especially when the said school president was also a senior. His friends kept telling him it was a terrible idea to take part in the elections, especially when finals were coming closer and closer, but Felix couldn’t refuse. He knew very well how much credit it would bring him while applying to universities, and getting a good scholarship was the only possibility for him to afford to leave his family house—and that was his absolute priority at the time.

The only problem was that Felix was absolutely lousy in most of his classes. He usually needed to put a lot of effort to get good grades, but even after long sessions of studying he hardly ever felt well-prepared. Passing his exams was like a lottery and he could never know for sure until the teacher announced his grades. Moreover, Felix hated studying alone. Trying to understand the material on his own usually led him to tears, the tears led to exhaustion, and in the end, it became impossible for him to learn a single thing. For Felix, school was nothing more than a vicious circle making his confidence fall lower and lower every day.

Unfortunately, his friends couldn’t offer him much help in that case. Hyunjin didn’t really care about his grades as he most likely would just get a sports scholarship anyway. As soon as he heard Felix’s idea of preparing together for finals, he quickly refused and said he didn’t have time for that, as he needed to focus on training. Changbin, on the other hand, was very eager to study together. At least in the beginning, because it soon turned out that neither of them was helpful to the other with both of them barely passing most of the subjects. They tried to ask Minho—the best student among the four of them—for help, but the boy got fed up with them after barely ten minutes of their first study session.

“I think I’m going to ask Seungmin for help,” Changbin announced one time, when they were hanging out at one of their favorite restaurants. Naturally, the topic of the impending exams came up, shifting the mood around the table.

“Seungmin? Who is Seungmin?” asked Hyunjin, frowning in confusion.

“He’s one of those nerds from our class,” Minho answered, pouring some more cola into his glass. He looked at Felix. “You know him, right?”

“Of course, I know him, it would be a pity if I didn’t know my own classmates. Come on, I’m the school president,” the boy replied, making them all chuckle. “I’m surprised Changbin knows him, though.”

He leaned forward, casting a curious glance at his friend, who was sitting in front of him on the other side of the table. Their shoulders lifted in a casual shrug but Felix couldn’t miss the flush of pink spreading across their cheeks.

“What? He’s smart. Everyone knows that.” Changbin shrugged, avoiding their gazes.

“You mean smart and cute.” Hyunjin leaned in slightly and winked at them with a teasing smile.

Changbin rolled their eyes but everyone could see the abashment written on his face.

“I just want to pass my exams, all right? Especially when I can’t count on any of you.” His accusative glance stopped for a little too long at Minho.

The boy raised his hands in defense. “I’ve tried, okay? It’s not my fault that you and Felix are just completely resistant to knowledge.” He glanced between them with pity.

They stopped their conversation when a waitress approached, placing their orders on the table. After thanking her for the food, Changbin spoke up again, picking up his fork.

“Anyway, I’m going to ask him tomorrow. Do you want to join, Felix?” He turned to the blonde, already munching on the food.

“And what, interrupt your little date? Thank you very much.” Felix shook his head, with an amused grin.

Changbin rolled his eyes. “I’m not asking him out! What’s up with all of you?”

Hyunjin, who was sitting next to Changbin, wrapped his arm around him.

“It’s just— Ya know, you could never know what that tutoring thing could possibly turn into.” He shrugged innocently.

Minho grimaced. “Stop being gross, Hwang.”

Hyunjin let go of Changbin and instead raised his hands in surrender.

Felix rested his chin on his intertwined palms and gently kicked Changbin’s leg under the table. “Why Seungmin, though? I’ve never seen you two talking.”

“We attended the same primary school. He’s always been a genius,” the black-haired explained. “We’ve never talked much, though. Especially now when we are in two different classes.”

“It’s not surprising. Nerds barely hang out with kids like us,” Hyunjin mumbled with his mouth full of food.

“Oh, but they do,” Minho noticed casually while pouring some soup into his bowl. “Seungmin always hangs out with that guy, Han Jisung. I was paired with him for a Biology project last year and he's far from being a nerd. Rather a chaotic mess.” He frowned. “He knows a bunch of random facts from the Discovery Channel, though. Maybe that’s nerdy enough of him to talk with those two guys, you know, Seungmin and Yang… I don’t remember his name but… Actually, why don’t you ask him for help, Lix? I mean, the other guy.” 

Felix frowned. He needed a moment to recall anyone with the surname Yang in their class but he quickly remembered. Yang Jeongin, the science genius. Felix never paid much attention to him, though—the boy usually rushed out of the school as soon as the classes ended. Even in the middle of a school day he could randomly disappear for one or two periods only to come back later, looking as if he had just run a marathon through a forest.

To say the least, Yang Jeongin was one of the biggest weirdos Felix had ever encountered. Yet, he was intelligent and cute enough for all the teachers to turn a blind eye to his strange actions. As far as Felix was concerned, he had to sit in detention a few times but in general that was it. Apparently, his contribution to the school's achievements was more important than ditching some classes.

Felix shrugged, not really convinced of the idea. “I don’t think he would have time for that. Besides, I don’t have a lot of it, either. I don’t want to bother him only for it to turn out that neither of us has time to meet.”

“Right, you and your school-presidenting.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes.

Felix poked his tongue at him. “Just the same as you and your practices.”

 “At least, I don’t have to give a damn about my grades anymore. I really don't get why you wanted to be a president. There’s plenty of ways to get more points for uni, and honestly, this one seems to be the least efficient.” Hyunjin shrugged, reaching for a napkin.

The blond boy sighed. “Yeah, I know it sucks but what else can I do? It seems to be the only thing I’m actually good at. And you know how much I want to…” he cleared his throat, before lowering his voice, “...leave home.”

His friends only nodded their heads but didn’t say anything, turning their focus to the food instead. Felix felt an unsettling twist in his stomach. The thing was that he had never been particularly clear with them when it came to his family situation. The only thing he had told them was that he wanted to move out after high school at all costs. However, he had never explained the reasons that stood behind that desperate desire. No matter how much he would like to tell them, he knew they would not understand. As far as he knew, they all had great relationships with their parents. Besides, Hyunjin was a talented athlete, Changbin’s family was rich, and Minho had almost as excellent grades as Kim Seungmin. The only major difference between those two was that Minho had absolutely no intention of participating in school life.

Felix, however, was just… Felix.

The only thing he could offer to his family was being a walking failure. His grades wouldn’t bring him any scholarship—rather an award for being extremely stupid. At least, that was how he perceived himself every time he looked in the mirror. Neither did he have any chances to get a sports scholarship, for he sucked at almost every discipline he had ever tried in his life (unfortunately, nobody perceived tripping over your own feet as a sports discipline). The only thing he was actually good at was being the school president. He hadn’t even had to put too much effort into his campaign for the elections. People had seemed to be very eager to vote for him from the very beginning, and the promise of organizing a Summer Party before summer holidays had eventually tipped the scales. Felix couldn’t be more grateful—becoming the voice of the students and being in charge of various events was probably the only thing that could bring him extra points for university.

After becoming the school president, he barely had time for anything. He wanted to use his new position in the best possible way he could. He started to come up with many different projects and events, trying to let his organizing skills cover the lack of knowledge on his future university applications. Unfortunately, implementing his projects turned out to be much more time-consuming than he had thought it would be, and soon he started to feel extremely exhausted with it all. Especially after finding a job at a restaurant that offered him a night shift until midnight. It wasn’t his dream job but at least they paid enough for it to be worth the sacrifice.

To make matters worse, the restaurant he worked at was situated far away from his neighborhood, so it usually took him about an hour to get back home after a shift. Fortunately, his high school was located much closer, so at least he had a good excuse not to come back home right after classes. Instead, he usually spent afternoons at the school, studying in the library or taking care of some school-president duties. After that, he had to take a quick bus ride and a short walk to his workplace.

Most of the time, Felix paid attention not to be late for work—after all, only two buses headed there from his high school. Of course, there were some other ways to get there but taking a bus was the most efficient option, especially for Felix who needed as much time to study as he could get and therefore valued every little moment of some free time.

However, sometimes homework could be really engaging, especially when he had to take care of preparing a school dance party in the meantime. One day, he got so involved in studying for his Math exam that he missed his usual bus and had to run to another bus stop to catch an alternative. Then he needed to run all the way to his workplace so as not to be late—even if they paid well, his boss had made it clear he wouldn’t approve of any inefficiencies.

The last thing he expected that day was to bump into his favorite superhero and knock him down to the ground.

If anybody asked, Felix would never admit how much he admired Spider-Man. After all, he had never even met them in person before, only seen them on the news. Sometimes he would notice the red-and-blue silhouette swinging somewhere far away but only for them to disappear in a matter of seconds. Anyway, Felix was absolutely amused by how the superhero always sacrificed themselves for the sake of others, how they managed to appear whenever something dangerous was happening. Some people even argued if there was more than one Spider-Man in the city but Felix was convinced that there was only one. And he sometimes wished he could be just like them, able to save the world, and at the same time, live a good life.

Somehow he deluded himself into believing that Spider-Man must be somebody with a successful life, maybe even rich and extremely intelligent, maybe an entrepreneur or a talented scientist by day, and a superhero by night. After all, how could an ordinary person swing around the whole city just like that? That’s why Felix was so surprised after meeting them in person. He just hadn’t expected Spider-Man to be so… human. Felix wasn’t sure what exactly he had expected, but at that moment the realization hit him that the superhero was only human, just like him and all the other people. The thing that surprised him the most, however, was Spider-Man’s voice. It sounded so young that Felix almost believed they could be the same age. But would it be possible for somebody his age to be a superhero? How could they be able to be a high school student and save the city at the same time? Felix had no idea and yet he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

 “How old do you think Spider-Man is?” He asked his friends one time during lunch. A few days had passed since the day when he had knocked the poor superhero down to the ground and the memory still kept replying in his brain.

 Minho shrugged. “I dunno, around thirty? He might be a crazy rich scientist or something. I don’t think it would be possible for a random citizen to swing around like that.”

 “Honestly, if I had superpowers I would screw this school and go to save the city as well. Why care about studying when you have superpowers?” Hyunjin noticed while peeling a tangerine. He threw a piece of the fruit into his mouth and threw his arms. “That guy could be either an old man or somebody our age, we could never know.”

Felix looked at him curiously. “You think he could be our age?”

The black-haired boy shrugged. “I dunno. Might be or might be not. It’s hard to tell.”

 “Why do you even assume that guy is a man?” Changbin asked. “And I’m not talking just about their gender but in general. What if they’re a robot or something?”

Hyunjin slowly nodded. “They could be, like, a military project or whatever.”

“I don’t think so. The government hates that guy too much for it to be their project,” Minho observed. “Don’t you remember how shocked everyone was when Spider-Man appeared in our city? The whole country was obsessed with finding out who they were. I’m not surprised, though, I think it’s the first superhero who has ever appeared in Busan. And you know how much the authorities hate it when something gets out of their control.”

Felix nodded and took a bite of his kimchi. “So… You think they might be a crazy scientist who just… ended up saving the city? But why would they do that?”

Hyunjin swallowed another piece of tangerine and looked at him with a serious expression, his hands gesticulating vividly.

“It is common for villains to behave kindly in the beginning. They pretend to be saving the world until they gain people’s trust and then BOOM! They take over the world,” he said apprehensively.

The blond-haired boy frowned. “Honestly, I don’t think Spider-Man aims to take over the world. They literally rescue little kittens and lost puppies.”

“Maybe they just hate people but love animals,” suggested Minho and sighed. “I’d totally do the same.”

Hyunjin burst into laughter. “Humanity would be doomed if Minho was Spider-Man.”

“Right, he would just save all the kittens and let the rest of the world collapse.” Changbin chuckled.

Minho raised an eyebrow and shook his head with amusement. “Would it be that bad, actually?”

Eventually, their conversation went back to their usual daily life concerns and Felix decided not to dwell on his doubts about Spider-Man anymore. First of all, bothering about the identity of the city’s superhero was the last thing he needed to add to the list of his current worries. Second of all, he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to share with his friends the reason why he had become so interested in Spider-Man. Besides, wouldn’t it be dangerous for the superhero themselves if somebody initiated an actual investigation to discover their identity? Felix himself was a person who extremely valued his own privacy and obviously didn’t want to violate the privacy of anybody else. Spider-Man probably had enough problems with the government and the police, who seemed to hate him without a certain reason, and didn’t need another person to stick their nose into their life.

Despite his strong desire to forget about the superhero, it seemed like the universe had suddenly decided otherwise. Felix wasn’t sure if what he saw was only a figment of his imagination and tired brain, however, he could swear that recently he had started to see Spider-Man almost everywhere. Their images haunted him on TV, on the Internet, in newspapers, and even in some random conversations of other students which he heard glimpses of while walking down the school corridors.

What surprised him the most, however, was that he had actually started seeing Spider-Man around whenever he was walking back home from work.

At first, he thought it was just a coincidence. The only thing he had seen were actually just glimpses of their red-and-blue suit, barely visible from afar. Maybe it was just a figment of his imagination or maybe the superhero was just minding their own business, Felix had no idea. He didn’t want to overthink it too much, but his curious nature had eventually made him start looking around carefully in search of Spider-Man whenever he was on his way home. Soon, what had seemed to be just an illusion, turned out to be true.

It had been going on for a few days actually and now Felix was almost sure he was being followed. All right, maybe he was only deluding himself into thinking that the superhero suddenly started to pay attention to him, but it really didn’t look like a coincidence. At first, it was nice to think that somebody cared about him, however, Felix soon became doubtful. After all, he had no idea who Spider-Man truly was. Hyunjin hadn’t been completely wrong when saying that villains sometimes pretended to be kind only to take over the world later. Of course, Felix didn’t think Spider-Man wanted to take over the world but the sudden interest he had taken in him was still more than suspicious.

And, unfortunately for the spider-guy, Felix absolutely despised it when someone violated his privacy.

“Hello, are you still on Earth with us?”

Felix shook himself out of cogitation when he noticed someone’s palm being waved right in front of his face. He shook his head and looked at his friends with confusion.

“Yes, yes, sorry. What’s up?”

Changbin groaned and buried their face in his palms. Felix raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t worry about him,” Minho said casually. “He’s just decided to ask Kim Seungmin to the Summer Party.”

Felix opened his eyes wide. “Wait, what? Really? I mean, that’s great!”

“No, it’s not great. It’s a disaster!”

Minho rolled his eyes. “How could you know? You haven’t even asked him yet. Besides, it really isn't such a big deal. Just go and ask him.”

“Literally, I feel like I get invited by someone almost every day,” Hyunjin commented. “Not to mention that I don’t even talk to most of these people.” He tapped Changbin’s arm reassuringly. “They don’t seem to be bothered very much after I refuse so I guess you’re gonna be fine, too.”

Changbin glanced at him from between his fingers. “You’re not helping.”

“I think you really should try,” said Felix, focusing back on his friends. “I’ve talked to him a few times and he’s really nice.”

Changbin sighed and rested his head on his hand. “I know, that’s why I want to ask him.”

“What about you, Lix?” Minho chimed in, casting him a curious glance.

The blond boy straightened up, running a hand through his hair, and looked at his friend with a frown. “What about me?”

“Are you going to invite someone? I mean, it’s you who came up with this whole event,” Minho explained with an indefinable smile.

Felix just shrugged. Even though he was responsible for organizing the summer dance, somehow it had never crossed his mind that maybe he could go with somebody, too. “I don’t know. I’m not even sure if I should go with anybody. I’m in charge of almost everything, after all.”

“It would be a shame if you went there alone.” Hyunjin tilted his head to the side. “I mean, it’s all about having fun, right?”

“Yes, but the headmaster said he will only give me credits if I take care of everything. I mean, it all has to be perfect. My grades are too bad to defend themselves so that’s the only way. If anything goes wrong…”

“Come on, why make such a big deal out of it?” Hyunjin brushed his black hair back. “In the end, it’s just a high school party. No matter what you do, most people will call it lame anyway.”

Felix couldn’t help but feel a sting of pain at the words. Minho glared warningly at Hyunjin but the latter only furrowed his eyebrows.

“Felix…”

But Felix didn’t let Minho finish. It was as if somebody switched his lights off, as if somebody clicked the wrong button. The pain stirred in his stomach, and suddenly the cafeteria seemed too loud for his ears and too bright for his eyes.

“It won’t be lame, okay? And it is a big deal. For me, it is,” he replied, trying to stop his voice from trembling.

Hyunjin raised his hands in defense. “Yeez, I’m sorry. I just don’t want you to get so stressed about it. But, yeah, whatever.” He grimaced and looked down at his lunch box.

Silence took over their table, making Felix feel even worse. Changbin and Minho exchanged nervous looks but they didn’t say anything, confused by the sudden argument. They were all used to Hyunjin acting like an asshole sometimes and definitely didn’t expect Felix to react in such a way.

It crossed Felix’s mind that maybe they even agreed with what Hyunjin had said, that maybe they thought this whole summer dance party idea was lame, too. At the same time, he knew that he himself was overreacting—after all, Hyunjin had good intentions, no matter how inappropriate words he had used to express it. Felix didn’t know why he reacted in the way he did, but he was just so very tired and his brain refused to work properly. He had been trying his best to maintain positive energy but there were just so many things on his head to worry about, and the moment Hyunjin vocalized some of the worries that had already been lurking in the corners of his brain, everything just crashed on Felix’s head with double force.

An unpleasant feeling spread through Felix’s body, making his throat clench. Suddenly everything around felt like it was too much and Felix knew that as soon as anybody spoke to him again, he was going to break down. His hands were trembling when he gathered his things and stuffed them all inside his backpack in a hurry. As he stood up, he didn’t spare a look at his friends.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” he announced quietly and put on his backpack. “We’ll catch up later.”

And then he dashed away, before any of his friends could react. As he passed the cafeteria, he kept his head down, preventing the other students from seeing how ridiculously red his face had turned. He was already on the verge of crying and he knew it was only a matter of seconds before he would completely burst into tears.

As soon as the bathroom door closed behind him, a loud sob left his throat, making his whole body quiver painfully. His face became all wet and it would probably be hard to hide the traces of his miserable breakdown, he knew it very well, however, once he started crying he couldn’t stop. He entered one of the cabins and curled up on the ground, hoping for all those pathetic feelings to leave him alone.

It was easy to keep his head up when he was surrounded by people. He was used to pretending that everything was all right. He couldn’t afford showing that it was not—there were things he didn’t want other people to be aware of. His life was far from being as perfect as other students believed it to be, attributing to him all those admirable traits that he mostly just pretended to have, whilst deep inside he was just a bundle of insecurities. So while he was always smiling around others, the smile was never there as soon as he was left all by himself. Because what was even there to smile about?

He pulled his legs closer to his chest and drew in a sniffling breath. Tears were dripping down his cheeks but he didn’t wipe them, he didn’t move an inch. His body just trembled right there where he was sitting, on the dirty floor in a toilet cabin. His head became a mess, throwing at him all those memories and thoughts that he usually tried to keep locked away, so that they couldn’t mess with him. But there was no way he could win a battle against his own brain.

Sometimes he wished there was somebody he could tell about all of this. Somebody who wouldn’t judge him for the mess that he was deep inside, for all those stupid traits in himself that he had to fight everyday but was never able to beat. He craved for somebody to hug him and tell him that maybe he was something more than just a burden that kept disappointing and hurting everyone around him.

Of course, nobody came. Nobody came because there was nothing to say. The thing was that he was, indeed, nothing more than a burden. It was another thing for which he had only himself to blame. The only person who could help him was only his miserable self.

And that probably equaled—nobody.

Chapter Text

Starting a day by falling straight into a trash can definitely wasn’t on Jeongin’s to-do list—especially not on the morning of his History exam, the one that counted for half his grade for the semester and, mind you, the one he’d been preparing for quite a long time.

Unfortunately, nobody had warned him that he would have to chase a delivery van through the whole city so early in the morning. If he had known beforehand, he would have made sure to leave home earlier so that he could have done his job without being late for school. Sure, call him boring, but he was already making a lot of sacrifices for this whole superhero thing, so the least he could ask for was a little bit of balance.

After leaving his aunt’s apartment, he barely managed to walk a few meters when he was interrupted with the familiar shiver on his skin. Then he heard the sound of police sirens somewhere far away, and a moment later, he was already in his suit, swinging quickly to catch up with the cause of the noise.

People on sidewalks always lifted their heads up at the sight of him, some of them taking pictures and videos, others waving or shouting. Today, he even noticed somebody wearing a cosplay of his suit. It always surprised Jeongin to see how much some people appreciated his job. Sometimes, it was even enough for him to recall their enthusiasm when he was feeling down. Even though not everyone appreciated his help, just thinking about some of those enthusiastic citizens was enough to give him the power to keep going.

“Spider-Man!” Someone down beneath pointed at him, making other pedestrians immediately raise their heads up to watch the superhero.

“Hi there, everyone! Please, stay out of trouble!” He only managed to shout back before moving to another building.

“You rock, Spider-Man! Woo-hoo!” Another man shouted, raising his fist in the air.

Finally, Jeongin located the reason for the sudden noise: a big, black truck rushing through the streets at a speed probably twice as high as allowed. Normally, it wouldn’t be that bad—after all, exceeding the speed limit wasn’t anything unusual. Unfortunately, this driver was not only breaking traffic laws but had also decided to crush whatever came in his way, including the fragile police cars that were vainly trying to stop the speeding vehicle.

Jeongin sighed. Not a single day of peace in this city.

He jumped onto the roof of the truck’s cab and clung to the metal whilst trying to see the driver through the side window. He had to admit it wasn’t the most comfortable way of taking a ride—not when the truck was rushing recklessly at full speed ahead.

“Knock, knock!” He shouted and tapped the glass with his fist before sticking his head out to face the driver. “Mister criminal?”

The bald man was polite enough to roll the window down. Jeongin noticed that his neck was covered with multiple tattoos of dragons.

“Hi there, my name’s Spider-Man!” Jeongin leaned on the edge of the window casually. “You can call me Web-head, you can call me Amazing... Just don’t call me late for dinner, get it?”

The man tried to punch him in the face but Jeongin dodged immediately. He pushed himself up to sit on the cabin’s roof and then bent to look back at the man, this time upside down.

“No offense, but did you get your driving license from a bag of Cheetos? I don’t have one myself, but honestly, I’ve seen better driving in a bumper car.”

“Fuck off!” The man groaned angrily and tried to shoot at him with the gun he had just taken from god-knows-where.

“Woah, okay!” Jeongin immediately moved himself up, hiding from bullets. It didn’t take long before the man ran out of ammunition.

His head popped out the window again. “All right, I think it’s time to make a little stop, don’t you think?”

Not waiting for a response, he shot a web straight into the man’s face, and then another one to get the gun away from his hands. Then he kicked him off to the passenger’s seat and quickly handcuffed him with another shot.

Jeongin smoothly climbed through the window straight onto the driver seat and pressed his foot on whatever he supposed to be the brake. Apparently, all the countless nights of playing video games with his friends had just paid off, as the tires screeched loudly when he pressed down the pedal. The truck began to slow down but it wasn’t enough. Not when suddenly a bus came round the bend—a bus full of citizens.

Jeongin’s body reacted automatically. He jumped out of the cabin and landed a few meters in front of the truck, getting ready to stop it with his own body. Even if the boy was prepared for the collision, it still managed to push him a few meters further. He used all of his strength to stop the vehicle, the muscles of his calves aching as he anchored his feet to the ground.

And eventually, the truck stopped.

Only one meter further and Jeongin would have turned into a smashed red-and-blue pancake between the two vehicles.

The police cars finally arrived and surrounded the area, filling it with the noise of wailing sirens. Before leaving the scene, Jeongin made sure that Mr. Criminal was safely seated inside the truck, unable to run away.

“It was nice to meet you but I need to get going. These gentlemen will take care of you from now on,” he said casually while the man growled at him, trying to free himself from the web restraining his hands. “By the way, next time we meet, can you please try not to cause any trouble? I would appreciate that very much, thanks.”

Jeongin saluted him, and after shooting some web toward the nearest building, he smoothly swung away. He didn’t pay attention to the police and journalists around—after all, he had classes to attend.

It didn’t take him long to find his backpack on his way to school, as he had left it somewhere near his home. Finding it so easily didn’t happen very often though, as villains loved to catch him off guard at the most unfavorable moments possible. A few times, he had left his backpack in such random places that later it took him even about an hour to find it after taking care of criminals.

One of the things Jeongin was the proudest of was the web fluid he had invented some time after discovering his superpowers. However, even if it was so reliable in most cases, there still was a tiny, tiny problem about it which the boy kept struggling to solve—the fluid wasn’t infinite.

Jeongin was painfully reminded about that fact when suddenly nothing came out of his web-shooter. The only thing he could do while falling down was wave his limbs helplessly in a pathetic attempt to stop the fall. Fortunately or not, he fell straight into a huge trash can.

The boy swore nastily under his breath but didn’t waste any more time and managed to get out of the garbage. Just his luck that it was located in the same alley where he had thrown his backpack before. He clumsily changed his—now stinky and dirty—suit into his jeans and a black knit polo sweater. After stuffing the suit into his backpack, he finally ran to school, hoping for his hair to be free of any possible garbage.

Just when he was about to open the front door, the sound of somebody’s quick footsteps stopped him from behind.

“Jeongin, wait!”

He turned back, surprised, and saw Felix climbing up the stairs towards him. He was gasping a little and his cheeks were red, as if he had been running to school as well.

Jeongin was too stunned to speak, his brain barely processing the fact that Lee Felix had not only spoken to him but also remembered his name. Which was probably completely normal since they were literally in the same class, but yeah, still a success if you asked Jeongin. As soon as their eyes met, he looked aside, completely incapable of keeping eye contact. He hung his mouth open and then closed it immediately, suddenly forgetting his mother tongue.

Skipping the highest step of stairs, Felix finally arrived at the door, now taking in deep breaths and panting. “There was so much traffic today, I thought I was never gonna make it here,” he groaned.

Jeongin couldn’t help but think how adorable the boy was, with his cheeks reddened and hair disheveled from the hustle. Believe it or not, but he had to use all his power to come up with a normal response without doing anything weird in the process.

“Right, so much traffic,” he agreed and immediately wanted to disappear after hearing his own lame words. He felt as if his brain had turned into a sponge. “Please, go first,” he quickly added, holding the door open for Felix.

He almost lost his balance when the other boy bestowed him with a dazzling smile in return. He was grateful for the door that kept him steady, and took a deep inhale before following him inside.

The corridors were completely empty and quiet, making their walk a bit awkward. The light echo of their footsteps was the only thing breaking the silence. Even though it wasn’t necessary for them to talk, Jeongin couldn’t help but desperately search his brain for anything he could say. He could already imagine how disappointed his friends would be after hearing that he didn’t use the chance of finally talking to his crush.

He let himself steal a glance at Felix. It seemed like the boy wasn’t paying him much attention, rather lost in his own thoughts. Jeongin noticed him biting his lower lip nervously, his fingers fidgeting with the straps of his backpack. To be fair, he was stunned to see him so nervous.

“I wonder if they’ve finished the exam yet,” Jeongin pointed, stealing countless uncertain glances at the blonde. He tried his best to sound as casual as possible.

“Probably yes.” Felix sighed. “Honestly, I’m not even sure if I’m glad not to be there or the opposite. I heard she sometimes gives a harder version of a test to people who take it in the second term… I’m surely going to fail if she does so.” He breathed out with an audible swoosh.

Now, the boy had such a miserable and hopeless look on his face that Jeongin felt a pang in his heart. He bit his lip, searching for the right words to cheer him up.

 “Did you study for a long time?” he asked, then instantly regretted it. It probably sounded incredibly stupid.

Felix didn’t seem to mind, though.

“I did!” He threw his hands in the air. “I always try! But it just never seems to be enough, you know? I’m so fucking done.”

Jeongin widened his eyes a little, completely unprepared for the other boy to share his thoughts so abruptly. Maybe it wasn’t a big deal, but somehow, it still made his heart flutter.

Before he could answer, Felix spoke up again, giving him a nervous look. His hands clenched back onto the straps. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have burst out like that.”

“No, no, it’s okay!” Jeongin replied quickly. “I get it, really. I mean, History is hard to learn in general. It’s easy to fail if you don’t have a good strategy.”

“A strategy?” The blonde looked at him curiously, making Jeongin dart his eyes away at the sudden, intense eye contact.

“Yes, I mean, a spla— a strategy! A plan. Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that the worst thing to do is to read your notes passively.” He turned his head slightly, eyebrows furrowed as he glanced at the boy’s face nervously. It was hard for him to keep his mind steady, but even if Felix had noticed his anxiousness, he didn’t seem to mind when he furrowed his eyebrows, thinking deeply.

“I usually just read it. I mean, the manuals. I— I don’t make notes. I never know what is important enough to be written down, I just—” He shook his head, clenching his jaw.

Even though they weren’t really looking at each other at that moment, Jeongin couldn’t help but smile, slightly amused by the boy’s preoccupation.

“It’s understandable, they don’t really teach us how to study at school. And I guess sometimes it’s not just that obvious,” he explained in a gentle voice.

Felix turned his head at him, and Jeongin noticed a glint of some uncertain curiosity sparkling somewhere in his eyes.

 “I’ve never really thought about it this way,” Felix slowly responded, but now his tone was rather interested than concerned. “Like, how to actually study. I usually just get mad at my brain for not being able to focus.” He shook his head with a trace of amusement.

Jeongin let out a small laugh and rolled his eyes. “Yeah, because they never teach us about it. They just expect us to… figure it out somehow.”

Felix cast him a fond smile. “And you did it, right? Figured it out.” 

Jeongin felt his cheeks heat up when he nodded. “I guess I did.”

He couldn’t feel more disappointed when they finally reached the classroom. He wanted to prolong their conversation, tell him more about what he knew about studying, find a way to help him. Seeing the smile on his face made his chest feel warm, and he was curious to see how many more smiles he could evoke. His brain was filled with all the possible words he could say to Felix, how he could help him or even offer him some tutoring. But the moment was already gone and they couldn’t waste anymore time. Skipping Mrs. Kim’s class entirely would only bring them more trouble, and besides, Jeongin was just too much of a coward to randomly offer tutoring to his crush. He would rather let the earth open up and swallow him whole than do something so crazy and risky.

“Here we are,” Felix murmured when they stopped in front of the door. He looked at Jeongin, uncertain. “So… Who’s going in first?”

Jeongin swallowed. It was high time to turn his hero-mode on. No matter how scary Mrs. Kim could be.

“I will go,” he whispered and Felix quickly nodded his head in agreement, making a step back.

Jeongin looked at him nervously and Felix offered him a small smile, finally encouraging him to open the door. The moment he made a first step inside the room, everyone's eyes fixated on him in an instant.

“Yang Jeongin!” Mrs. Kim’s voice was definitely too loud for his liking. “I’m glad you decided to finally grace us with your presence.”

He bowed and greeted the woman shyly, mumbling an apology for being late. In the corner of his eye he saw Felix do the same. The presence of the other boy was comforting, at least they were in trouble together.

Together.

Oh.

“It’s not the first time you’re late, Mr. Yang. You really must have a huge audacity to show up so late, especially when there’s an exam scheduled. Usually, I close my eyes to your late arrivals, but honestly, how many times is it going to happen again? Should I start drawing consequences for you to finally consider leaving your house early enough not to skip half of my class?”

Jeongin could only stare at the floor in shame. He didn’t dare to look up, not wanting to see his classmates watching his humiliation. The last thing he wanted to see were their faces, annoyed or, even worse—amused by the scene.

“We both got stuck in traffic, Mrs. Kim,” Felix spoke up hesitantly after a moment. “It all happened so suddenly, we just couldn't foresee it. We’re truly sorry.”

Jeongin bit his lip, keeping his hands intertwined behind his back and looked at the teacher with a silent plea for pity. He was scared to say anything more, afraid that it would only make matters worse.

Mrs. Kim glanced at them both, considering Felix’s words. Finally, she let out a sigh and dismissed them with a wave of her hand. “All right. In that case, you will take the exam today, right after your last lesson. Fortunately, today’s schedule is suitable for all three of us. You can go and sit now.”

“Thank you,” they said in harmony and rushed to take their seats after bowing politely.

On his way, Jeongin made eye contact with his two friends. While Seungmin seemed to be quite concerned, Jisung had an excited smirk on his face. Or rather a grimace, as he was trying to hold back his excitement. He didn’t have to say anything for Jeongin to know perfectly what his friend was thinking about.

“Oh, I almost forgot,” Mrs. Kim spoke up again. “In the beginning of the lesson, your classmates were assigned to make projects for the next month. Since you came late together, I suppose you won’t mind working together on it as well.” She took a look at the papers scattered on her desk. “Your topic is the background of the Korean War. And please, do not be late with this one.”

Jeongin was already full of emotions but now he felt almost dizzy. It took him a while to fully comprehend the meaning of the teacher’s words. Then he only nodded at her in agreement, not even daring to look at Felix. If he did, he would probably die of nervousness and embarrassment.

Holy shit.

He looked at Jisung and regretted it immediately after seeing his best friend’s eyes wide open. Seungmin’s expression didn’t look any better, though.

Jeongin stared intensely at the whiteboard, pretending to be listening to Mrs. Kim who now was explaining the details of the project as there were only a few minutes left to the end of the class. His right leg was bouncing up and down nervously and he felt as if he could jump out through a window at any moment. Thoughts were storming through his mind so fast that he was unable to read them, therefore having no idea what to think about this whole situation. Like, what the actual hell?

Honestly, sometimes fighting villains was a piece of cake in comparison to being a teenager. No high school drama, no crushes, no blushes. Only him and the bad guys. It might sound crazy but while sitting by his desk, he really wished to be out there swinging around the city right now, instead of this. Because this was absolute madness.

“Dude, what the hell was that?!”

Of course, Jisung couldn’t keep his mouth shut even for a second when they finally left the classroom.

“Shush!” Jeongin looked around the corridor nervously. “Do you have to be so loud all the time?”

“Duuude!” The boy ignored his complaint, grabbing his arms instead. “It was— It was— Duuude!”

“Do you know any other words than ‘dude’?” Seungmin rolled his eyes and pushed the boy aside, now grabbing Jeongin’s arm himself. He would have been grateful if not for the teasing smile that appeared on his best friend’s face. “So, Iyen-ah? Would you mind explaining what happened?”

“As I said, there was traffic.”

Jisung grabbed his other arm. “We don’t care why you came late but why you came late with him!”

“I said shut up,” he hissed.

“Oh, I will never. Did you make out?”

Jeongin frowned, “No, what the hell?”

“Just asking.”

“You looked quite cute together, standing there like two beaten puppies,” Seungmin commented. “Not even mentioning the fact that he basically saved your ass.”

Jeongin sighed. His best friend was right—if not for Felix, the teacher surely would have been much more serious about him showing up late again. Most likely, that boy was the only reason why she hadn’t drawn any consequences.

“He… He remembered my name,” he mumbled quietly, recalling the moment of meeting Felix by the school entrance.

“What? Holy shit!” Jisung’s jaw dropped.

“Well… I guess we can consider it a success,” said Seungmin and tapped the boy’s arm.

“Now it’s only a matter of time before you two get together. We need to come up with a good plan so you can wrap him around your finger while doing this silly project… Dude, I can’t believe it was Mrs. Kim to do you the biggest favor, out of all goddamn people.” Jisung shook his head incredulously.

Jeongin groaned, profoundly ashamed. “What the hell are you talking about, I’m not wrapping him around my– what?”

“Hell yeah, baby, you are!” Ignoring his protest, Jisung took Jeongin’s hand and pushed him forward only to pull him back in a second as if they were dancing. Some of the students in the corridor sent them judging looks but his best friend couldn’t care less. “From doing a project together straight to the Summer Party and then you'll be living your happy ever after.”

“Don’t forget about the test after classes,” Seungmin teased with a smirk growing on his face and Jeongin glared at him, knowing too damn well that his main goal was only to induce Jisung even more. “All alone in a classroom…”

“Yeah, together with Mrs. Kim.” Jeongin rolled his eyes. “How lovely.”

As expected, his friends wouldn’t shut up for the rest of the day. Not that he was surprised—he would surely act the same way if it was one of them ending up in such a situation. Nonetheless, listening to their stupid jokes and insinuations for the whole day still managed to drive him insane. He couldn’t have been more glad when it was time for him to show up by Mrs. Kim’s classroom once again, finally getting rid of his so-called friends whose apparent goal for today was to annoy the shit out of him.

After saying their goodbyes—of course, with another round of teasing, smirks, and then of Jisung wishing him goddamn luck—Jeongin slowly headed to the classroom. He ran a hand through his hair and cleared his throat before turning the last corner.

His heart fluttered when he saw Felix already waiting there. The boy was standing with one shoulder against the wall, his eyebrows furrowed as he buried his nose in a notebook, silently mouthing its contents. Jeongin couldn’t help but find him cute as he watched him trying desperately to remember as much as possible during these last five minutes before the exam.

“She’s not here yet?” He asked, coming closer to the boy.

Felix looked up and cast him a nervous smile. “Oh, hi. Nope, she hasn’t arrived yet, fortunately.” He looked back at his notebook but he seemed distracted this time. Finally, he shook his head and let out a resigned sigh. “There’s no way I’m going to pass it, fuck.”

Jeongin pointed at the notebook. “May I see?”

The other boy gave it to him, resting his temple against the wall.

Jeongin flipped through the pages, examining the barely readable mess inside.

“So… When was the light bulb invented? And by who?” He asked and looked back at Felix.

The freckled boy furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, taking a moment to think. One of his feet kept patting quietly against the floor.

“Ugh, the light bulb… It must be Thomas Edison, right? Was it in… 1879?” His brown eyes glistened in anticipation.

“Yup, that’s correct!” Jeongin smiled and paged further through the notebook. “Now, when and where did the first Industrial Revolution begin?”

Felix tapped his foot more. “18th century… Great Britain? Is it enough?”

“Yep, I think so…” Jeongin frowned while reading the notes. “Wait, you have written the wrong date for the phonograph’s invention. It’s 1877, not 1778.”

“What? Oh shit.” Felix pushed himself off the wall and stepped closer to take a look.

Jeongin froze and held his breath, not daring to move even an inch. They were so close. Felix peered over his shoulder at the notebook, his hair brushing against Jeongin’s cheek. They were standing so close that he could feel the warmth radiating from the boy’s body, especially when he grabbed the notebook with one of his small hands, placing it right next to Jeongin’s. One little move and their palms would touch. Jeongin felt as if he could faint at any moment—and the sweet scent of the blonde’s perfume wasn’t helping at all.

But then Felix moved away.

“She’s coming,” he whispered and gently took the notebook from Jeongin's hands.

They didn’t talk anymore when the teacher showed up. She made them sit away from each other, so the only thing they could do was to exchange nervous looks after getting the test sheets. Fortunately, most of the questions were easy and Jeongin managed to take care of them quickly. He decided not to leave the classroom too early, though, when he noticed that Felix was visibly struggling. A thought came to his mind that maybe—just maybe—he would have a chance to help the boy at least a little bit.

So, he waited. And waited. And then, the teacher’s phone suddenly rang, causing her to stand up abruptly and leave the classroom with the loud sound of her heels hitting against the floor.

As soon as she left, the two boys immediately looked at each other, one of them determined and the other pleading.

Jeongin had no idea how they had managed to communicate while being so far away and still trying to be as quiet as possible—but somehow their weird gestures and lips reading worked pretty well. They managed to exchange the answers of about ten questions before the teacher came back. Fortunately, she didn’t even notice anything, as apparently, the phone call had brought her much more important stuff to worry about.

Jeongin checked his paper one last time and then glanced at Felix to make sure he was okay. When he saw the boy nod and smile briefly, he decided it was high time for him to leave. If he stayed longer, Mrs. Kim could get suspicious, anyway.

After leaving the class, he needed to take a deep breath. His heart was pounding. Again.

He took his phone out of his pocket and quickly opened the group chat he had with Jisung and Seungmin.

innie: i’m finally done

innie: it wasn’t as bad as i expected

innie: btw will it be weird if i wait for him outside??

hannie: WAIT FOR HIM OMGFG

hannie: DONT YOU DARE LEAVE

innie: I helped him with some questions

seungminnie: I hope he’s not going to fail bc of you

innie: -,-

seungminnie: :D

hannie: hfkddkkdskskw

innie: hfksksksks

Then the door opened and Felix left the classroom with a huge grin on his face.

“Let’s go,” he whispered and pointed forward with his head.

When they were at a safe distance from the classroom, Felix immediately started babbling, comparing and recalling all their answers. Jeongin couldn’t help but smile while looking at his excitement. He couldn’t believe how easy it was to talk to Lee Felix—it was as if they knew each other forever. It felt… warm. His heart felt warm.

“Really, I can’t even express how grateful I am,” Felix said with a sigh, gently grabbing his arm to get his attention.

Although the gesture made his heart turn upside down, Jeongin just let out a nervous chuckle and waved it off. “I’m glad I could help,” he answered, his palms sweating.

Before he could realize, they were already outside the building, now standing there unsurely, both of them wondering what to do—whether they should just go home or maybe stay and talk for a little longer.

Eventually, Felix broke the silence.

 “So, um, about the project… When are you free?”

Jeongin shrugged, “Anytime. What about tomorrow?”

Felix frowned for a second and then nodded. “Yep, sounds good.” He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, his fingers again fidgeting with a strap of his backpack. “I– I’m sorry to ask but… would you mind if we met at your place? Or maybe at the library, it would be fine, too. I can’t really… Um…”

His eyes were looking everywhere but at him and Jeongin immediately felt bad, sensing his nervousness. He didn’t even care what this was all about, just nodded his head quickly and sent him a reassuring smile.

“Sure, we can meet at my place,” he said.

Felix’s face brightened and his eyes glistened with gratitude. “That would be great. I will make sure to bring some snacks.”

“Oh, I would love some.” He grinned and then clumsily took out his phone, almost dropping it to the ground. “C–could you give me my number? I’ll send you-r address.”

The freckled boy chuckled. “I’m afraid I don’t know your number.”

Jeongin felt the skin on his face burning. “Oh, I mean, your number. And my address. Would you mind?” He chuckled nervously and scratched his neck.

The other boy just shook his head and reached for the phone, grinning with amusement.

 “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” Jeongin slipped his phone back in his pocket, making sure to swiftly wipe the clammy skin of palms against his jeans. “So… See you tomorrow? I will text you the address.”

Felix grinned and nodded. “See you tomorrow.”

When the boy walked away, Jeongin stood there for another moment, trying to calm down his bouncing heart. His lips curved up in a huge grin, making his cheeks hurt after a moment. Actually, he wanted to scream with joy.

But Yang Jeongin wouldn’t be Yang Jeongin if everything suddenly started to go well in his life. He was reminded about it one more time that day, after putting his suit back on and… just standing there like a loser when nothing came out of his web-shooters. He cursed loudly and almost tripped over his own feet while changing into his normal clothes, feeling like a complete idiot hiding behind a trash can, before running back inside the school.

Indeed, dealing with villains was much easier than dealing with pretty boys.

Chapter Text

If Felix were to point out one positive aspect of his job, it would undoubtedly be the complete absence of time to overthink his daily life worries. By the end of a day, his brain would be throbbing as a consequence of staying intensely focused for so many hours. At least, the only thing occupying his mind at the time was his job duties and the occasional concerns stemming from some unpleasant encounters with customers. In such an environment, there was simply no room for any negative thoughts about his personal life to cross his mind—and that was something Felix highly appreciated.

And that would be the extent of it when it came to the positive aspects because the amount of stress Felix experienced here wasn’t worth a candle. Especially on Fridays, when there were so many customers easily getting impatient due to the long wait. Felix had always considered himself a charismatic person who found it easy to interact and get on well even with strangers, but in gastronomy sometimes even the warmest smile wasn’t enough. Besides, the fact that there were only two waiters on a shift today didn’t make matters any better.

“I hate fucking Fridays,” Chan grumbled as he tossed a used napkin into a trash can. His elegant, white shirt was now covered in tomato sauce. 

Felix grimaced at the sight and sent the older boy a sympathetic smile. While Chan let out a few more curses under his breath, he collected the dishes ready to be carried to the customers on his tray.

“Be careful while going out there, Jesus,” the man added while desperately trying to get rid of the stains. “These children are running everywhere as if it was a goddamn playground.”

“I’ll keep my eyes wide open,” Felix promised and left the kitchen.

Going from the kitchen to the guest area always felt like entering another dimension. Felix liked to compare it to leaving the safe space of the main menu area in a game and entering a battleground—except instead of monsters, it was filled with customers.

As soon as he crossed the threshold, he looked around carefully in search of any potential threats that could cause him to stumble and send the food crashing to the ground. Fortunately, it seemed like the parents of the child had managed to cool him down because Felix reached his assigned part of the restaurant without any further obstacles.

Sometimes, he truly regretted the fact that being a waiter didn’t matter on university applications because, modesty aside, Felix could proudly admit to having mastered the art of his waiter-walk to perfection. All right, maybe there was still some room for improvement, as his arms kept trembling under some heavier trays but, in general, he took great pride in his ability to move around so gracefully in such a crowded and tight area of the restaurant.

What a shame the customers barely appreciated it, as they were too busy with finding some stupid reasons for complaining, no matter how hard Felix and his co-workers would try to please them.

But even when people were calling names at him, the boy never let himself lower his guard down—after all, every tip mattered.

He smoothly made his way to his section of the restaurant and began distributing the dishes. It seemed like all the families with children had decided to congregate in Chan’s area, leaving Felix mostly with couples and small groups of students. Fortunately, most of his guests today were pleasant and understanding, making his heart warm out of gratitude.

Of course, there had to be an exception.

An older man, seated at the last table in the row, peered at him over the rim of his glasses. “Does it always take so much time to get food in this restaurant or is it just you who cannot do his job properly?”

Felix felt the blood boiling in his veins but didn’t let it show. Instead, he gently put the meal on the table in front of the man and then bowed politely.

“I apologize if you waited long, sir. Unfortunately, there are only two of us on a shift today,” he explained, smiling a little.

The man snorted. “It’s not my problem. Now, get out of here.”

Felix bowed again, choosing not to strike an argument. He already regretted saying anything further—Chan always told him that he shouldn’t use that explanation as people simply didn’t care. Actually, the best way was not to provide any explanation at all. Just act as if you were truly sorry. Not that Chan followed these rules by himself, of course not. But still, it was useful to possess such knowledge. Besides, compared to the truly vicious customers Felix had encountered in the past, the older man’s attitude seemed almost mild in comparison. Some of them had even succeeded in bringing the boy to the verge of tears. Such a horrible and humiliating experience. Felix didn’t even want to imagine what would have happened if not for Chan who had his back.

Bang Chan was three years older than him and was currently pursuing a degree in music at university. Felix didn’t know much about his studies, only that he produced music on his own and had even released some songs that had conquered the market quite successfully. However, Chan’s rising career still wasn’t enough for him to focus only on it, without doing part-time jobs. Felix really admired the man’s passion towards music as it seemed like nothing could stop him from trying his best.

When Felix had first arrived at the restaurant, Chan had already been working there. He had been the one to take the younger boy under his wing and guide him into the business. Despite their age gap, they clicked together almost immediately and soon it felt as if Chan was an older brother Felix had never had. He always knew what to say whenever the boy came to him with a problem or even when he was simply feeling down.

“You all right, mate?” The older boy put a hand on his arm when Felix was passing by to get back to the kitchen. He briefly pointed his chin at the older customer.

Felix smiled weakly and nodded. “I’m fine, don’t worry. It’s nothing.”

Chan stared at him for a short moment before simply nodding and tapping his arm. “All right. But if anything happens, let me know.”

“Sure. Thanks, hyung.”

At first, Felix hadn’t been sure how to handle his co-worker’s protectiveness. He hadn’t been sure if it derived only from his sense of duty or maybe from his true intentions. However, he had quickly learned that it was just the way Chan was—caring and overprotective. Although they rather didn’t keep in touch outside of the restaurant, he knew he could always rely on him if he needed. Unfortunately, it worked only in one direction because Chan would never bother the younger boy with his own concerns. At least, Felix could express his gratitude by providing him with supplies of his homemade brownies with which Chan seemed to have fallen in love at some point.

The rest of his shift went without any further incidents. Which couldn’t be said about Chan who had to face two complaining families with screaming and running children, and a couple of broken plates in addition. It was surprising the man managed to keep his composure, though Felix could see from his face he was on the verge of losing it. Well, another wonderful day at work. At least, they could joke about it later while taking care of all the mess before closing.

After collecting the last dirty plate from the tables in his area, Felix could finally take a breath. He briefly checked his phone while sitting on the cold tiles in the kitchen and responded to some of his friends’ messages in their group chat. It was right then when he noticed a message from an unknown number, having been sent to him a few minutes ago.

unknown: hi, it's Jeongin here :) I'm sending my address and please, let me know what time you will arrive tomorrow :)

Felix couldn’t help but smile at the message. He still was extremely grateful to the boy for helping him on the History exam. For the whole day he had been so stressed out about writing it after classes—he could never be sure if Mrs. Kim wouldn’t take her revenge on them for being late—and yet the universe had decided to send him Yang Jeongin to the rescue.

He saved the number under the boy’s name and quickly wrote a response.

Felix: hello! thank you for sending me the address. I was thinking of coming around 3PM, would that be okay? c:

He didn’t have to wait long for the answer.

Jeongin: sure, sounds great!

Jeongin: btw don't hesitate to call me tomorrow if you have any problems with finding my flat or sth :)

Felix: ofc, thanks!

Jeongin: awesome! good night, then :)

Felix stared at his phone for a while, a smile dancing on his lips. His fingers hesitated over the keyboard, unsure which buttons to click on. There was something about Jeongin, something so warm that it made it so easy for Felix to talk to him. Not that he had any problems with talking to people in general but when it came to Jeongin, it just felt comfortable. As if the boy wouldn’t judge him, he would just listen. Maybe it was about that freaking cute smile of his, Felix had no idea, but it just radiated comfort and safety.

He sighed and eventually responded with a simple 'good night c:'. It was already late in the night, he didn’t want to bother the poor boy. Besides, what they could even talk about, the freaking inventions of the 19th century? Jeongin had already witnessed enough of his complete lack of knowledge in that area, thank you very much.

He put his phone back into his backpack and lazily lifted himself from the ground. There was still a lot of cleaning left, surely enough to keep two people busy for another hour. Only an hour and he would finally go home, he could do this.

Cleaning definitely wasn’t the most pleasurable thing to do, nonetheless, there was something relaxing about it. Although his muscles felt sore after scouring clean another table, it helped to keep his mind off the usual worries. That was the thing he truly enjoyed about his night shifts—watching the restaurant slowly emptying until it was left only with staff and the usual mess.

“All right, boys, I think it’s all good,” his boss said after leaving the kitchen and looking around the guest area. “I’ll handle it from now, you two can go home.”

Together with Chan, they quickly gathered their belongings and left the restaurant. They chatted for a while but their conversation didn’t last long as they lived in different parts of the city. Soon, Felix was alone in the night, with street lights being his only company.

Or maybe not.

He couldn’t help but glance around carefully, searching for any suspicious rustle or a flash of red and blue in the distance. After his encounter with Spider-Man two weeks ago, it had now become a habit for him to look out for the superhero everytime he was walking back home from work.

Although he couldn’t be sure if his assumptions about Spider-Man following him were true, he was really determined to catch them red-handed, just to prove himself right. Otherwise, it would only mean that he was crazy and obsessed, witnessing things that never even happened. But deep in his heart he was convinced that something had changed those two weeks ago.

Felix wasn’t sure what he was thinking about it all. He couldn’t say that Spider-Man was a bad person, not with all the goodness that he was bringing to the city. Yet, something about the possibility of the superhero suddenly gaining interest in him and following him around didn’t sit right with Felix. And yes, maybe he was going mad, but he could swear that he had never seen Spider-Man around so often. And he couldn’t get rid of the thought that, somehow, he was the reason for it.

The street he was passing was almost entirely empty at the hour, with Felix’s footsteps being the only sound echoing around. The boy had walked almost the entire length of it down towards the first turn, keeping all his senses alert. Yet, Spider-Man was nowhere to be seen. But Felix knew he was somewhere up there. He had to be. And the boy had no plans on giving up so easily, hell no. Perhaps the superhero wouldn’t come close if Felix followed his usual path, but maybe they would show up if he did something unexpected. 

Taking one last look around, the boy turned right and ventured into a dark alley, instead of staying on the main street like he usually did. As far as he was concerned, the alley was a shortcut leading to his bus stop, so it made sense for him to go there. Felix just never chose it as it was too dark and too shady for a young, fragile boy like him to follow. It was excluded and dirty, filled with unpleasant smells coming from the huge garbage containers. It was one of those alleys to which many of the stores had their emergency exits or storage rooms opening into, and thus not really frequented by anyone apart from workers or homeless. It was the place where junkies met with their dealers, too.

It probably was just his luck that the alley was completely empty tonight. He let out a sigh of relief at the realization, only to jump out of surprise when a stray cat suddenly crossed his path, causing his entire body to tense up. His heart pounded loudly in his chest, but he continued down the alley. Now, he could only hope that Spider-Man was hiding somewhere in the dark, watching over him. If his suspicions were correct, the superhero should not only be following him but even be concerned about Felix suddenly changing his usual route.

As the alley was coming to an end, his expectations of seeing the superhero were sinking lower and lower. Maybe he really was going insane—deluding himself into thinking that someone like Spider-Man could give a damn about someone like him. It didn’t even make much sense, really. In fact, Felix was pretty sure there wasn’t a single soul who wouldn’t laugh in his face if they ever heard such a ridiculous idea.

Just when he was about to reach the end of the alley, suddenly—clink.

A small, metallic sound reverberated behind him, like a pebble falling from somewhere high and hitting the surface of one of the garbage containers. It made Felix freeze and turn his head, eyes squinting to see better in the darkness. His heartbeat quickened a bit, both from anticipation and fear. Even though he had been determined to meet Spider-Man and prove his point, being alone in a dark alley still caused his mind to imagine less pleasant scenarios.

“Um… Spider-Man?” he asked quietly, a spark of hope audible in his voice. At this point, he might as well call out and make sure what was going on by himself.

Surprisingly, he didn’t have to wait long for a response. After a stretched moment of silent anticipation, he finally heard it: a delicate ruffle somewhere up there, then a little swoosh, and finally a quiet tap of feet landing just behind him. Sounds barely noticeable in other circumstances, yet this time loud enough for Felix’s expectant ears to catch.

Slowly, he turned around just to stand face to face with the superhero.

This time, they didn’t look intimidating at all. Quite the contrary, Felix easily noticed the awkwardness in his posture, even though the superhero was trying to stand upright. He seemed tense, just like the boy, unsure what to say and with no clue what to do. And Felix couldn’t help but relate to all of this, as now he too forgot what the purpose of his actions had been in the first place.

Spider-Man cleared his throat and awkwardly propped his hands on his hips, trying to appear at least a little bit more composed. “Did you call me, citizen?”

Felix clutched his hands onto the straps of his backpack even harder, taking a small step to the side, as he watched the superhero. Blood was coursing through his veins a bit faster than usual, and he wondered if the superhero could hear how hard his heart was beating.

He gulped nervously and then cleared his throat before finally speaking. “I– You’ve been around often recently, haven’t you?” he asked, unsure of how to put his thoughts together. At that moment, he wasn’t even sure what he was thinking anymore. Fear? Curiosity? Probably both. Or maybe he was not thinking at all.

Spider-Man tilted his head a little to the side, and unless he was experiencing some kind of hallucination, Felix could swear that the white lenses of his suit had stretched a little in surprise. 

The superhero nodded his head, words coming out slowly, each one of them deliberate and carefully chosen. “Yeah, of course I’ve been around here a lot. Always make sure to swing by—this area gets real sketchy at night.” He scratched the back of his neck, then motioned vaguely in Felix’s direction. “Yah, besides, you shouldn't be choosing shady shortcuts like this, you know? I couldn’t help but hang around when I noticed, it really makes me worried. It’s– You never know what can happen.” Finally, he stepped closer and then pointed his arm forward, indicating the street before them like a gentleman. “There, let me walk you and make sure nothing happens, how about that?”

Felix was a little bit taken aback, not expecting such a turn of events at all. Eventually, he moved his feet but remained silent, unable to really create a coherent sentence. His mind was swirling with thoughts but his brain was too tired after the whole day, too tired to be figuring anything out anymore.

But now, as he looked at his surroundings, now more attent to what was happening around him rather than in his own head, he appreciated the superhero’s presence. As he had noticed earlier—it was just his luck that the alley was completely empty tonight. And yes, even though he had been feeling weird for the past two weeks, now it felt strangely comforting to have somebody by his side on his way home. For the first time ever.

“Is it always that you’re coming home so late?” Spider-Man asked after a moment, breaking the tentative silence that had settled between them. There was a little spark of curiosity in his voice, blended together with what Felix assumed to be a little bit of genuine concern and kindness. And hearing that, it felt strangely comforting.

Felix nodded lightly, taking a glance at the superhero. “Only after work, yeah. So about a few times a week, I guess.” He shrugged and kicked at a pebble lying on the pavement just under his feet.

“Doesn’t it feel too much? I mean, combining working until such late hours with school. You seem young.” Spider-Man swung his arms awkwardly by his sides.

Felix scoffed under his breath and rolled his eyes. “I don’t have much of a choice. Besides, you don’t sound so old yourself.” He teased, allowing the corners of his mouth to curl up into a small smirk.

Spider-Man tilted his head backwards, as if in annoyance, and sighed. “You’re at it again?”

Felix shrugged. “I mean, maybe it’s a compliment. You know, one of my friends assumed you could be a robot or something.” He paused for a moment before casting a quick, uncertain glance at the superhero. “But you’re not, right?”

Spider-Man turned to him in disbelief. “Oh, you think I’m what, a robot? Now that’s an insult.”

Felix chuckled at his indignant reaction. He raised his arms in surrender, palms up. “I’m sorry, okay? It was just an assumption.”

Spider-Man crossed his arms and tilted his head slightly, the fabric of his mask crinkling with what could only be annoyance. “Well, I would highly appreciate it if you didn’t point out my voice, thank you very much.” he said, voice edged with mock offense. “It’s already enough that you assumed I'm a robot! Unbelievable.”

“Hey, it was one of my friends who assumed you could be a robot. I'm just making sure,” Felix pointed out.

“Well, next time you see them, tell your friends I’m much more than some glorified tin can.” Spider-Man responded resentfully.

Felix grinned mischievously. “Oh, I don’t know... you do creak a little when you land.”

The superhero gasped in disbelief. “Okay, wow. You know what? I take back the whole ‘dangerous area’ thing. You’re on your own next time.” He swung his arms in a dramatic gesture.

“Fine, I’m sorry. Just joking.” Felix raised his hands in surrender. He quietly laughed again, and as they continued their walk down the street, he once again glanced at the superhero, with a genuine smile curling up in the corners of his lips. “You know, you’re quite cool to be around.”

Spider-Man seemed a little abashed at that, remaining silent for a second longer than necessary. Just then he lightly shrugged his arms and tilted his head, trying to appear casual. “Sure thing I am. But don’t worry, you’re quite cool yourself.” He added, getting another laugh out of Felix. Then he sighed and looked down at the ground, pausing in thought for a moment. “By the way, I’m sorry if my presence ever made you uncomfortable. That was never my intention—but I guess the fact that I can, um… show up quickly when something shady happens might come off as a little shady itself.”

Felix felt a shiver going down his skin as a chilly breeze of wind blew into his face. But it was a good feeling—those pleasant tickles that appeared only when he was feeling truly relaxed, even careless. There was just something about Spider–Man’s presence, he realized, something so strangely, yet pleasantly comforting.

He kicked at another loose pebble on the ground. “Don’t worry about it, it was probably just me overthinking things.”

They continued down the street, neither of them saying much anymore—but that didn’t matter. At least not to Felix. There was a quiet warmth in the silence between them, something gentle and grounding. It felt good to have someone walking beside him, even if that someone was still almost a stranger. 

His peace of mind was suddenly interrupted when the phone vibrated in his pocket. He briefly glanced at the screen, knowing perfectly well who had written to him without even having to read the message. After tucking the phone back into his pocket, he ran his fingers through his hair and let out a sigh. For a short moment during their conversation, he could have forgotten about his shitty reality, but obviously it wasn’t going to leave him in peace for too long.

He lifted his head, just about to say his goodbyes to the superhero, when suddenly a bus appeared from a building. His bus.

Felix felt the blood draw back from his face when the vehicle didn’t even stop, passing by the empty bus stop and disappearing behind another building before he could even blink.

“Hey– Wait! Wait!” he shouted and immediately took off running, one hand clutching the strap of his backpack as he sprinted toward the bus stop. But it was already too late—just a second later, he reached the street only to see the bus disappearing around the corner.

He was just about to rush into the street at full speed when he suddenly felt something latch onto his back and yank him backward with force. A second later, a speeding car flew past, cutting across the road right in front of him.

Felix fell onto the sidewalk, breathing heavily and staring ahead in disbelief. Too many things had happened at once and his brain was barely able to comprehend them all. A moment later, Spider-Man appeared by his side, crouching down next to him.

“My– My bus. It’s gone,” Felix let out a weak whisper.

His heart was pounding hard in his chest and he felt tears welling up in his eyes. It was the last bus that could bring him to his house and he had no idea how else he could get there, never really needing to use another means of transportation. But now his bus was gone, having arrived a damned minute earlier and not even bothering to stop where it was supposed to. And now, Felix was doomed.

His breath locked in his chest as he stared blankly at the now-empty street. The car had already disappeared round a bend, leaving Felix shaken. The realization hit him that, if not for Spider-Man’s intervention, he would have been nothing more than a crushed mess on the street. His heart pounded in his chest and his knees started to shake. He tried to get up and would have fallen down if Spider-Man hadn’t grabbed him by the arms at the last moment.

“Hey, careful there,” Spider-Man said quietly, keeping him steady by his arm. “Let’s take a slow, deep breath, okay? Let’s not make any rash decisions right now.” 

Felix followed his guidance and took two deep breaths, even though it barely helped. To be honest, with each breath he was feeling even more shaken.

His third inhale was followed by a loud, involuntary sniffle. “It was my last bus. I’m not sure how to get home now, the next one is probably in a few hours. God, I messed up so bad this time, she will be so mad,” he kept muttering under his breath, now crossing the street almost like a madman, eyes desperately scanning the bus timetables.

A hand gently rested on his shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay,” Spider-Man said in a calm, soft voice. “You’re not alone here, remember? I wouldn’t let you alone. I will help you get home, okay?”

Felix stopped in his tracks, then glanced up at the superhero, not really sure if he was understanding correctly. “What… do you mean?,” he asked slowly, with an uncertain look.

“How about—” Spider-Man began but hesitated for a moment. “I mean, I could… swing you home if you’d like. It would be much faster.” He gave a little shrug but kept his eyes on the boy.

Felix froze and looked at the superhero with wide eyes. “You– You mean like… f-fly?” His hands gestured awkwardly as he was trying to figure out how the hell Spider-Man was supposed to help him. And unfortunately, there was only one way he could think of.

Spider-Man scratched the back of his neck. “More like… swing.”

Swing.

Yes, Felix had seen many videos of those acrobatics, of Spider-Man swinging from one skyscraper to another, of him stopping speeding vehicles, and falling from unbelievably high elevations. But being there, being the one to be doing all that, with Spider-Man or without… Felix wasn’t sure if his poor heart was going to survive this.

“Are you… sure it’s safe?”

Despite his growing dread, Spider-Man’s demeanor brightened immediately as if completely ignoring the fact how dangerous it actually was—the fact that he basically proposed to Felix to swing him home through a whole city on nothing more than a tiny string of web—whatever this whole web was even made of.

 “Oh, I’m more than sure. My web-shooters are freshly filled, don't you worry.” He proudly rested his palms on his hips. “You will be back home before you can even blink.”

By now, Felix’s face was probably completely out of color. “That’s what I’m worried about, yeah,” he responded weakly. Then he furrowed his eyebrows at the realization. “Wait, what do you mean, 'freshly filled'? Oh, no, no, no, I’m not letting you swing with me around the city when there’s a possibility you may run out of web, are you crazy?”

Despite the mask hiding his face, Felix was convinced that the superhero had rolled his eyes at him. Oh, the audacity.

“Oh, come on, I have it all calculated. Have a little more faith in your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man,” they said with a hint of amusement.

Felix coughed and looked warily at the superhero. To be honest, he was absolutely terrified at the idea, unable to even imagine how they were supposed to cross the city just like that, jumping from one building to another. Yet, on the other hand, he had seen Spider-Man do it. And, hell, whatever this whole stunt was, he seemed to be really good at it. 

Besides, what other choice did he have?

The superhero sighed and tilted his head. “You’ll be fine, I promise. Just trust me on this one, okay?” He extended a hand toward him in an inviting gesture.

Felix bit his lip, pondering for just another moment, before finally giving up and taking his hand. “Fine. But if we die… I will go back from the dead and kick your ass myself.”

The mask on the other’s face stretched as he grinned in response. “Sure thing.”

Felix took a step forward while stealthily brushing his sweaty palm on his jeans. “So, um, what should I do?” he asked hesitantly.

“Just hold on tight—and try not to scream in my ear.” Spider-Man murmured, taking a small step closer before gently placing a hand on the boy’s waist, pulling him in. 

Felix felt a string of electricity rush across his skin, all the way up to his cheeks, heating them up. Their height difference wasn’t significant, only about an inch, but Felix still felt small in comparison to their well-built silhouette. Avoiding their gaze, he hesitantly raised his arms up to the other’s nape, his fingers hovering uncertainly for a second before finally settling on the back of his neck.

“I, um, is this okay?” he asked, not sure how to behave.

It’s not like he had never imagined such an encounter to happen—of course he had, dreaming about Spider-Man, the famous savior of Busan carrying him in his arms around the city. But now, when it was actually happening, he had no idea what to do. And what’s worse, his vulnerable heart seemed to be even more confused than his brain.

 “All good. So, are you ready to go?” the superhero asked, voice low and calm, almost gentle.

Felix nodded, though it came out more like a stiff bob of his head. His heart was pounding in his chest. “Yeah. I think so.”

“All right. Hold on tight!”

Even though Spider-Man had counted aloud before taking off, Felix wasn't ready at all for the sudden burst of acceleration. The arm around his waist pulled him closer, and then a sharp thwip rang out as the web shot forward, launching them off the ground and into the sky. As soon as his feet left the ground, he let out an embarrassingly loud scream, clutching the superhero like his life depended on it.

“WOOAAAAH, HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIIIIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! YAAAAAH!”

Never in his life had Felix experienced anything like this. Not even the fastest roller coaster came close to the feeling of swinging high above the city, placing every ounce of trust in someone else’s strength—and their thin thread of web. The city lights below blurred into a messy stream of color, making him completely unaware of their surroundings. All he could feel was the wind crashing against his skin and its deafening roar filling his ears.

“Oh, I forgot to ask. Where should I drop you off?” Spider-Man Spider-Man called out casually, like they weren’t soaring faster than the cars below.

“WHAT?!”

“Where do you live?”

Felix somehow managed to stutter his answer between screams and swears. After a few minutes that felt like a lifetime, the soles of his shoes finally hit solid ground again.

He stood frozen for a beat, gripping Spider-Man’s arm until his balance returned. His knees wobbled, but eventually they remembered how to work. The world still spun slightly around him, his brain overwhelmed by the sudden excess of stimuli and adrenaline. Only after a moment did he realize that they were already in his neighborhood.

He took a deep, shaky breath and shook his head in disbelief. “This is absolutely crazy, I'm never doing this again.” He glanced up at Spider-Man. “How can you do this every day?”

The superhero chuckled. “It’s not that bad when you get used to it. Are you okay?”

“I think so, yeah. Just a bit shaky.” He took a deep inhale but the cold air was doing a good job at bringing him back to his senses.

When he finally regained his composure, the atmosphere between them thickened. It was high time for them both to part their ways—and high time for Felix to finally let go of his ridiculous suspicions from before. As the silence settled between them again, he finally felt stupid about all that he had felt before. All his suspicions and silly assumptions—now it felt sickening just to think about them.

“So, um,” he started, while Spider-Man tilted their head and listened attentively. “Thank you for bringing me here.”

“The pleasure’s all mine.” The superhero bowed theatrically, causing the freckled boy to snort a laughter.

Felix hesitated, taking a small step from one foot to the other. “So… I guess I’ll see you around?” he asked, hiding his hand in the pockets of his jacket.

“Only if you're okay with it,” Spider-Man replied.

The freckled boy nodded. “I am. Sorry for acting weird earlier. I really appreciate you… doing your job. And thanks for saving me back then.”

The superhero gave a small nod. “That’s all I’m here for.”

“I’m glad you were there. Like, really,” Felix added sincerely, glancing up at him.

“It’s nothing. Just try not to get into trouble when I'm not around, yeah?”

Felix shook his head in agreement, the corners of his lips curling up into a soft smile. “I’ll try.” Finally, he took a step back and awkwardly pointed at the building behind him. “Um, I have to… you know.”

Spider-Man nodded immediately, clasping his hands. “Sure thing, of course. I’ll get going as well. So yeah, good night, then. And take care.”

Felix smiled lightly. “Good night.”

They looked at each other for another moment before Spider-Man cleared their throat and swung away. They managed to exchange last waves of goodbye before the superhero disappeared in the night. Felix watched their figure vanish in the darkness until he was left alone again. He sighed but eventually turned around on his heels and entered the building.

 Now, it was time to return to reality.

As he opened the door of his flat, the boy couldn't help but scrunch his nose at the disgusting stench of alcohol coming from the inside. His head immediately felt dizzy at the lack of fresh air and he wished to be back outside, maybe swing again with Spider-Man, far away from here. In comparison to this outrageous smell, flying around the city felt like paradise.

He tried to slip into his room as quietly as possible, but the cramped space of the flat didn’t make it easy. Empty bottles strewn across the floor clinked beneath his steps, each sound too loud in the silence. His shoulders hunched instinctively—out of fear of the unexpected. Fear and caution, both etched into him like a bad habit. Though every light was off, the dull flicker of the living room TV cast shifting shadows across the hallway—just enough to show that his mother was still awake.

The door of his bedroom creaked loudly when he pushed it open. Too loud.

“You’re late,” his mother announced flatly.

“I'm sorry,” he replied, voice coming out weak and hoarse. But he didn't bother to give any explanation, knowing too well that his mother wouldn't give a damn about anything he wanted to say.

The woman briefly lifted her head from the couch and looked him up and down with a grimace. Then she turned her attention back to the TV. Her jaw was clenched but she didn't say anything. There was no need to do so—her disapproving body language was enough for her son to realize how unwelcome he was there.

The boy clenched his hand on the door frame of his room and bit his lip in hesitation. “Mom, I… I’m going to visit a friend from school tomorrow. We have a History project together,” he announced, feeling his chest tighten.

The woman didn't spare any more look at him. “Make sure to clean the floors before you go. That’s the least you can do.”

He bowed his head, even though she couldn't see it. “Of course.”

When his mother didn’t say anything more, Felix took it as his cue to leave. He closed the door behind him and stared blankly into the space of his bedroom. A lump formed in his throat but he managed to swallow it down.

Slowly, he forced himself to move and began cleaning his room a little bit. He liked to have his space organized—it made an impression as if his life was organized as well. This way, he could delude himself into thinking that there was something he had under control. Fortunately, his mother avoided his bedroom like the plague and barely entered it. Although it felt weird and awkward, at least this way he could keep it clean easily.

He carefully took off his jewelry and hid it in one of the drawers in his desk, putting every ring and necklace inside a designated box. After making sure everything was back in place, he quietly left the room to prepare himself to sleep.

His mother didn’t pay him any attention when he passed behind the couch on his way to the bathroom. Neither did she look at Felix on his way back, only clenched her jaw tighter at the loud sound of a bottle rattling across the floor after the boy had accidentally kicked it. When he finally reached his bedroom, he gently closed the door and rested his back against it, taking a deep breath. It was so exhausting, all of this.

The boy didn’t even have the energy to check his phone, only plugged it in to charge. He curled himself under a blanket and tried to push his mind off the negative thoughts that had begun to overrun his mind. The skin on his arms hurt when he dug his nails into it. Trying to stop his mind from thinking, determined to fall asleep and get this night over with, to get out of this hell hole as soon as possible.

Tomorrow was going to be a better day, he told himself, squeezing his eyes shut. He’d bake brownies, focus on school, and just keep moving forward—one step at a time, like he always did.

Tomorrow, he repeated.

Just wait until tomorrow.

Chapter Text

That night, Jeongin couldn’t shut his eyes even for a second.

As soon as he dropped Felix home, he had to quickly swing away, unable to manage his emotions and thumping heart. He could still smell the sweet scent of the blond’s perfume wafting in the air around him, although he wasn’t sure if it was now just a figment of his memory rather than reality. All of those events immediately felt surreal the moment he swung away and it all blended into a huge mess in his head. It didn’t take long for Jeongin to realize that he wouldn’t be able to sleep that night at all.

He didn’t even notice when he ended up on top of one of the skyscrapers in Haeundae District. It was only after a moment that he finally sat there alone in peace, allowing the refreshing breeze from the sea to calm down his mind. Slowly, the emotional hurricane that had been roaring in his head started descending.

Jeongin took his mask off, letting the cool air brush against his face. He was sitting on the edge of a rooftop, his legs swinging back and forth. After all those months, it still felt unbelievable to be able to just casually hang out on top of one of the tallest buildings in Busan. However, no matter how crazy it felt, he couldn’t imagine a better place to be. Here it felt like time had stopped, patiently waiting for Jeongin to get himself together. 

He took a deep breath and observed the night life of the city unfolding beneath him. Colorful lights flickered, cars honked, people milled around the sidewalks. A distant horn of a ship echoed from the sea, the loud sound somehow perfectly harmonizing with all the noise. No police or ambulance sirens, no people screaming either with anger or for help. It seemed like even the city of Busan had decided to just let Jeongin be.

But the boy knew his city and knew that nights could never be perfect—not for everyone, at least. He knew that soon the pleasant goosebumps on his skin would change together with his senses heightening. Yet, for now, he let himself enjoy his moment of peace. If anything was going to happen, the skyscraper made it a perfect location to set off.

Peacefulness felt good but the superhero eventually left his spot on the rooftop. Although his mind had calmed down, his body was still filled with a rush of adrenaline. Besides, Jeongin could never sit in one place for too long, knowing too well that even if the area was peaceful, something bad could be happening even a few streets away.

Putting his mask back on, he took a running start and jumped off the rooftop. The wind roared in his ears, stealing the scream that he let out as the adrenaline rushed in his veins when he plummeted. He swiftly shot a web, then another one, navigating around the skyscrapers to eventually advance deeper into the heart of the city.

It took only a few minutes for the tingling to appear, diverging down his spine and covering his skin with goosebumps. Jeongin landed gracefully on the wall of one of the buildings in the area and crawled down to peek at the interior of a local grocery store. He snuggled closer to the wall, a rush of indignation immediately storming through his body when he noticed a terrified elderly woman hastily emptying the cash register with trembling hands. There was also another person inside, a man dressed all in black from head to toe, holding a gun aimed straight at her head.

Jeongin had done this many times before.

A doorbell rang gently above his head as he entered the store, immediately capturing the thief’s attention.

“What the— Don’t move!” The man shouted but hesitated, not sure whom to point his gun at now.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, I don’t wanna be a party pooper here but, well…” Spider-Man didn’t wait for a response and swiftly shot his web towards the man, snatching the gun from his grasp.

Taking care of local thieves, it always felt so familiar to the point Jeongin was almost bored, the well-known scenario etched in his memory. It was as if he was replying the same moves, maybe a choreography, or as if he was retrying the same level in a game over and over again. As if nothing could surprise him…

The thief wasn’t alone.

A gunshot echoed through the air, the sound so loud and unexpected that Jeongin’s whole body tensed almost painfully. His instincts kicked in as he clumsily dodged to the side, but it was too late. It all lasted about a second but when the wave of pain struck his body, it felt like eternity. The bullet dashed forward, tearing the skin on his ribs with surgical precision. Fresh and warm blood spilled and soaked into the thin material of his suit. Jeongin gasped and stumbled, ducking behind one of the shelves with his hand pressed to the wound. His senses heightened, responding to the alarm.

It wasn’t a game anymore.

Injuries happened many times during fights, it was almost inevitable. However, Spider-Man usually managed to avoid the more serious ones, leaving with only a few scratches and bruises. Being shot was a whole new ballgame and when it happened, things usually tended to get a bit… heavier.

The pain radiated through him as he leaned against the cold glass of a drink fridge, breathing heavily. He needed to compose himself quickly, the woman still needed his help. He took the last deep, shaky breath and leaped from behind the shelf, shooting his web towards the second thief. A sudden feeling of anger ignited inside him. Jeongin didn’t like to be caught off guard, not like that.

What happened next was too fast to comprehend, with the superhero jumping on the ceiling and then webs shooting left and right, the thieves trying to fight or escape but in vain. It was all over after a few moments, the men hanging upside down from the ceiling, unable to move as the web was glued to their limbs.

Spider-Man landed gracefully on the floor and let out a deep, annoyed sigh while brushing the dust off his shoulders. He ignored the groaning men and turned to the shop assistant, not being in the mood for bantering.

“Are you okay, ma’am?” Jeongin asked, jumping above the counter to help the woman get up from the ground. Fortunately, she seemed to be fine, just a little jittery.

“Don’t worry, Spider-Man, I’m all right.” She glanced at his wound and frowned. “You don’t look too good yourself, though. You should go and take care of it. I’ve already called the police, they should be here soon.”

“I will wait, I need to make sure that—”

The doorbell rang when somebody entered the store in a hurry. Jeongin turned around immediately, ready to shoot a web but stumbled as he noticed a boy his age rushing towards them, his face red and breath heavy as if he had been running.

“Halmeoni, are you okay? Oh—” The boy stopped in his tracks after noticing Spider-Man. Then his sight switched to the ceiling, at the thieves still hanging there helplessly.

Jeongin blinked a few times, capturing the boy’s face. He hadn’t recognized him at first, with his body and mind too overwhelmed by the injury, but the boy’s boba eyes hidden under the messy, brown fringe were unmistakable.

“Oh, what are you doing here, Minho-ya?”

The boy averted his sight from the thieves and walked towards the woman, grabbing her hands carefully.

“I heard shooting and I just— What— What happened?”

“It’s nothing, don’t worry. Spider-Man took care of everything. The police are on their way.” She clasped her grandson’s hands fondly and looked at the superhero. “Thank you, Spider-Man. You really should go, Minho will stay with me.”

Jeongin hesitated although his body was slowly becoming numb. His eyes met Minho’s, who then glanced down at the superhero’s wound and grimaced.

Then his eyes softened. “Do you— Do you need help?”

Spider-Man shook his head but before he managed to say anything, Minho was already looking at him severely. 

“Go then, take care of it. I will stay with halmeoni.”

The superhero nodded gratefully and cast one final glance at the thieves, making sure they were harmless and safely glued to the ceiling. Eventually, he managed to stumble his way outside the store, the pain in his ribs now radiating with doubled force, warm blood still soaking through his suit.

No matter how great his healing abilities were, it all could be for nothing without treating those more serious injuries beforehand—and the gunshot wound he had gotten definitely needed a few stitches. But Jeongin was stubborn to get home first, taking advantage of the remnants of adrenaline still coursing through his veins. He didn’t want to risk stopping in a random, dark alley and not being able to move later. Besides, neither did he have with him anything he could clean and stitch the wound with, anyway.

As much as he loved swinging through the city, his way back home was a torture.

The wound on his ribs strained with every movement, causing multiple waves of pain to stream through his body continuously. He felt as if he could collapse at any moment, his sight blurring and head getting dizzy. Every webshot foreshadowed another painful yank for which Jeongin could only clench his teeth.

Finally, after what felt like eternity, he reached the wall of his apartment building. He crawled up to his window and clumsily got inside his bedroom, almost falling down on the floor.

Jeongin snatched the mask off his face, which was now all covered in sweat. Breathing shakily, the boy lowered himself to the ground and rested his back against his bed. He shot another web to keep the door locked, and then managed to get his first-aid kit from under the furniture, his hands shaking as he pulled out some sterile wipes and a small bottle of antiseptic. Jeongin examined his suit and cursed at the sight of the ripped, stained material—it would require some repairs later. Clumsily, he took off the suit and tossed it into a corner. He tore open one of the sterile wipes and began to clean the edges of his wound. He couldn’t help but grimace in discomfort, but clenching his teeth hard, he continued to dab it meticulously.

Once the cut was more or less clean, he poured a careful amount of antiseptic over it, hissing and cursing under his breath as the liquid came in touch with the wound. Only after a moment the stinging sensation began to cease, together with his breath steading slowly.

Now the time had come for the part Jeongin despised the most—suturing. For him it was like some kind of dark magic and he could never master the art perfectly. Sure, he had learned how to sew his suit after some time, but stitching himself was completely different and Jeongin always wanted to get over with it as quickly as possible, not even caring to do his job carefully. When he pushed the needle through his skin, bile gathered in his throat, and he needed to pause for a moment and look away. He felt like he could vomit at any moment now.

Somehow he managed to stitch the cut together, although it looked almost as awful as Jeongin was feeling. Not wanting to see the work of art he had created any longer, he placed a sterile gauze on it and then wrapped a bandage around his torso snugly. Finally, it was all done.

With a deep sigh, he tilted his head back and closed his eyes. The pain slowly began to let go, his immune system finally able to get to work. His eyelids felt heavy and it seemed like his body was calling him to go to sleep, and let it do its job without any interruptions.

And so he surrendered.

𒌐

If not for aunt Sohee, he surely would have been doomed a long time ago.

“Jeongin, are you still asleep? It’s almost 10AM!” she called, banging at the door of his bedroom.

The boy almost fell off his bed out of surprise, getting tangled in his sheets as he hurriedly started to kick it in a ridiculous attempt of getting up. Pain struck from his ribs, the wound from yesterday reminding him of its presence almost indignantly. Yet, it wasn’t as striking as it had been a few hours ago—it seemed like his body was doing a good job repairing the damage.

“No! No, I’m awake! I’m awake!” he shouted and looked around the room, blinking rapidly.

The last thing Jeongin remembered was throwing his suit under his bed and putting a random T-shirt on, just to cover the wound in case his aunt decided to storm into his room in the morning. He hadn’t even bothered to take a shower and had gone straight to bed—the effects of which were now revealed in the unpleasant smell of sweat coming from his body.

Jeongin wiped his face with his hand and took his phone out of his backpack, realizing that if the shower had already waited a whole night for him, then it could still wait a few minutes longer. He wasn’t surprised to see numerous notifications from the group chat he shared with Seungmin and Jisung. In fact, those were the only notifications he got. He sighed, a little disappointed, but didn’t let it linger in his head for too long.

He rolled onto his side, careful not to make any sharp movements, and scrolled through the group chat, trying to react to all the memes Jisung had sent and even snorting with amusement at some of Seungmin’s responses. Their messages were mostly random and pointless—just as usual, though—only later they had started to tease Jeongin about his today’s meeting with Felix as they had suddenly remembered about it in the evening.

Right. Felix.

Jeongin threw his phone away, making the poor device roll on the sheets a few times, but the boy had no time to care. Tossing his duvet aside, he jerked up from the bed—hissing when the cut on his waist stretched painfully—and grabbed some clean clothes on his way to the bathroom. He would figure his outfit out later, now there was no time. Especially not when his bedroom was a complete mess.

“Would you like some breakfast, Innie?” Aunt Sohee peeked out of the kitchen as her nephew stormed to the bathroom.

“Yes, please!”

Then he disappeared behind the bathroom door.

The wound was doing surprisingly well. No matter how awful the stitches looked, they seemed to be doing their job. Nonetheless, the sight still made Jeongin gag and dart his gaze away. Waves of pain radiating through his body from time to time were already enough, and he absolutely didn’t need to hurt himself more with that disturbing sight as an addition.

After showering and changing the bandages on his waist, it took Jeongin quite a while to make his hair look presentable. Although he still wasn’t satisfied with the final result, the boy figured that if he spent even a second longer struggling with the goddamn hair brush and hairdryer, he would turn into a madman.

“Come on, breakfast’s ready,” his aunt announced when he finally left the bathroom.

The boy marched into the kitchen and sat cross-legged beside the table. While waiting for his aunt to join, he leaned aside and one last time examined his reflection in the oven door, fixing the unruly strands on his forehead.

“Hey, aunt Sohee?”

“Mhm?”

“Do you think that my hair looks good?” he asked, brushing his hand through dark brown locks in another attempt to fix it.

The woman chuckled. “Looks perfect, as always. What’s the occasion?” The corners of her mouth lifted as she looked at him curiously, putting two steaming cups of barley tea on the table.

“Oh, um, you know. Felix is coming later.” Jeongin shrugged although his cheeks flushed with a hue of pink. He reached for chopsticks lying on the table to occupy himself with something else.

“Felix?” Aunt Sohee arched an eyebrow.

The boy avoided her eyes, digging into the rice in his bowl. “Yeah, Felix. A boy from my class. I told you we’re doing a History project together.”

“Right. And he’s the reason for you to play dress up?” Aunt Sohee observed him with a smile dancing at the corners of her lips.

Jeongin raised his head with indignation. “I’m not playing dress up!”

“Oh, sure thing you are.” Aunt Sohee looked him up and down. “So,” she continued after taking a bite of her food. “Is he cute?”

Jeongin sent her a glare but eventually gave up and sighed. “Hell yeah, he is.”

“Oh, I see,” she chuckled. “I can’t wait to meet him.”

The boy swallowed down his food. “But, auntie, please, don’t scare him off,” he added, looking her in the eyes.

“Oh, excuse me? Me scaring him off?” She snorted. “Look at your bedroom! If anything in this flat is going to scare the poor boy off then it could only be the mess in your room! Certainly not me.” She shook her head in disbelief.

Jeongin rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

“I have no idea what you mean.”

“Okay. Fine. But I swear, if you even try to show him those pictures of me as a child…”

“Oh, but they’re very cute pictures!” Aunt Sohee cocked her head to the side and smiled innocently.

“No, auntie, please! No childhood photos,” he whined.

“Okay, okay, I copy that. No childhood photos. Not in the near future, at least.”

“Auntie!”

In the rush of a quick and nervous clean up of his room and rummaging through all the cupboards in the kitchen in search of snacks, Jeongin didn’t even notice when about four hours had passed. Aunt Sohee didn’t make the situation better while watching her poor nephew bustle around the flat in panic and throwing some jokes and teasing from time to time. Although, when the job was done, even she had to admit that the boy’s bedroom was looking strikingly spotless.

Well, what was happening inside his wardrobe was yet another story, but nobody had to know that.

Picking an outfit was yet another battle to fight, but fortunately, together with his aunt they managed to put together something that was neither too messy nor too foppish. Taking basic for granted seemed to be a choice that worked in every circumstance, for so he ended up wearing jeans, a simple black T-shirt, and an oversized, checkered, black shirt with long sleeves.

Of course, he had to send a photo for his best friends’ approval.

innie: Felix’s coming in an hour

innie: what are we thinking?

jisungie: oh, boyfie is boyfying

innie: -,-

innie: what is that supposed to mean

jisungie: let's go on a date, hottie :*

innie: i suppose it looks good then?

seungminnie: Cool, but you should add a necklace or sth

jisungie: true

Jeongin opened the drawer where he kept his jewelry and other accessories, and took out a simple silver chain.

innie: *pic*

innie: this will do?

jisungie: ohh bad boy vibes

jisungie: i like it

seungminnie: Approved.

There were still about thirty minutes left until 3PM. Jeongin sat cross-legged on his bed and took one last glance around the room. Aunt Sohee was right when joking about his sudden awakening—the room had never been as clean as it was now. There was not a single piece of clothing left on the floor, each one of them safely hidden in his wardrobe, with his Spider-Man costume at the very bottom. Books stood neatly on the shelves, together with some of his lego buildings. Meanwhile his desk was almost spotless, arranged with only his laptop, History manuals, and the snacks he had prepared for Felix and himself.

Did all the cleanliness give away how stressed he was about their meeting? He hoped not.

Thirty minutes was a tricky amount of time that in some situations seemed like nothing, while in others it stretched endlessly. Every minute dragged on forever, driving Jeongin crazy. His body ached for action, he despised sitting and waiting. He stared at his phone, wondering if he should text Felix and ask how he was doing. But wouldn’t it be too pushy? Jeongin didn’t want to make an impression of rushing him, after all, the boy still had plenty of time.

His doubts were quickly dispelled when a notification popped out on the screen, making his heart skip a beat.

Felix: hello, i’m so sorry but i’m going to be a bit late, i missed my bus and had to take another one :(

Felix: hopefully it won’t be later than 3:15

Jeongin: no problem :)

Jeongin: i could walk to the bus stop in the meantime

Felix: awesome, thank you!!

Felix: i’ll keep you updated

Jeongin: kkay c:

Jeongin jumped off his bed and took one last glance around his room, swirling around himself a few times. Fortunately, it didn’t get dirty during the last few minutes, although it still was worth checking. His gaze fell on the skateboard that stood leaning against his desk. Taking it was a tempting idea but… well, maybe not for a person that had been gunshot barely a few hours ago.

So, walking it would be.

“I’m gonna pick up Felix from the bus stop, we'll be here soon,” Jeongin announced while slipping into his Vans shoes. Then he straightened up and looked at aunt Sohee while nervously fixing his hair for like the hundredth time that day. “Does my hair look okay?”

The woman chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Yes, my handsome boy, it looks very good.”

He nodded his head and exhaled deeply. “Okay. Okay. I will get going then.”

Aunt Sohee suddenly opened her eyes wide and clapped her hands. “Maybe I could prepare something for dinner for the three of us, hmm? How about bibimbap?”

Jeongin smiled widely and stepped forward to kiss her on the cheek.

“You’re truly the best, auntie.”

“Get going now, you don’t want to keep him waiting, do you?” She smiled fondly, leaning against the door frame.

Jeongin cast her one last nervous smile and then dashed out the flat, leaping past steps on his way down.

He was so used to swinging around the city or running and jumping across rooftops that walking started to feel a bit awkward. Maybe it was recommended in his current condition but even then he couldn’t just go at a normal pace and almost began to trot at some point. Therefore he reached the bus stop much earlier than he should, now being forced to sit on a bench with his leg jumping up and down.

He took out his phone and tapped a message after a moment of hesitation.

Jeongin: I'm already at the bus stop

Felix: kk, should be there in like ten minutes

Jeongin: kkay!

Jeongin bit his lip and opened the chat with his best friends.

innie: ten minutes !!

jisungie: what?

seungminnie: Good luck, soldier

innie: i'm so stressed rn

jisungie: ah, felix

jisungie: ur gonna invite him to summer party??

seungminnie: :O

Oh. To be honest, he had completely forgotten about the whole idea. Thinking about it now, he wasn’t so sure anymore if that was the right thing to do, no matter how long he had been aiming to make a move. The thing was that his relationship with Felix had taken a completely unexpected turn—a turn where going to a school dance party with him seemed more like fantasy. It didn’t feel like the right place and time and, besides, it seemed like there was much more to lose than to gain.

innie: idk, should i?

innie: i don't think i should

jisungie: -,-

jisungie: oh boy

seungminnie: Still, you could test the waters a little

seungminnie: Ask how the preparations are going or sth

seungminnie: He's in charge of it, isn't he?

jisungie: oh riiiiight

innie: i'll try i guess??

innie: OH THE BUS'S HERE

Just then a familiar white-and-blue vehicle emerged from around the corner, followed by a notification popping out on his phone screen.

Felix: i hope it's the right bus stop haha

Jeongin didn’t even manage to respond as the bus stopped right in front of him. He jumped off the bench and wiped his hands on his jeans, waiting.

Felix looked ethereal. One could say Jeongin was exaggerating but that was the literal impression as the boy’s blond hair glistened in the sunlight. His eyes were shining when he beamed at Jeongin, making his heart flip flop at the sight. The gray hoodie the boy was wearing didn’t help at all as it looked so warm Jeongin just wanted to hug him close.

“Hi! Sorry I’m late, but you know how it is…” Felix burst out with a nervous smile and jogged up towards him, adjusting the strap of his bag. He gave an exaggerated pout, already mid-explanation. “I was just about to leave but then my shirt got stained, and obviously, I couldn’t just show up like that, so I had to change, and by the time I was done and sprinting for the bus, yeah… too late.” He exhaled hard, a mix of defeat and drama. “I ran like my life depended on it, but nope, of course I had to miss it.”

Jeongin giggled at his dramatic explanation, his poor heart already accelerating. “It’s okay, don’t worry, I barely just got here. And what’s that?” He pointed at the box the blond was carrying.

Felix’s smile grew even wider at the question. “I promised to bring snacks, didn't I? So, yeah, um…” His brown eyes fled to the side, a slight hue of pink covering his cheeks. “I thought I would make brownies. I’ve figured out a great recipe recently and I thought it would be perfect.”

Jeongin cast him an encouraging smile. “Oh, I’m sure it’s delicious. And they will be perfect later for us to top the sugar up. Probably a necessity to carry on with the project,” he added, making Felix chuckle.

Side by side, they walked down the street in the direction of Jeongin’s flat. The proximity of their bodies radiated a comforting warmth through his body. Jeongin couldn’t believe they were actually there, going to make a project together. It all felt like a dream.

He glimpsed at the boy. His face looked so soft and delicate, yet it was hard not to notice the wrinkled skin around his eyebrows. There were bags under his eyes too, clearly indicating something more than just a concern about the project—and unfortunately, Jeongin already knew the real cause for his tired look. Deep inside, it made his heart clench.

“So, you like baking?” he asked, figuring it might be a good topic to continue. He wanted the boy to feel comfortable and at ease, at least for this one day.

Felix nodded, a soft smile finding its way back onto his lips. “It’s nice to do it from time to time. Feels relieving.” He tilted his head to look at Jeongin. “Do you like it?”

“Oh, um, it’s fun for sure but… Let's say it’s better not to let me in the kitchen.” He chuckled nervously.

Felix snorted out a laugh and nudged his arm playfully. “I’m sure it’s not that bad, come on.”

“Trust me, it is that bad.”

After a few minutes, they reached the building where aunt Sohee’s flat was. Jeongin’s heart was beating nervously as they climbed up the stairs. He hoped his aunt wouldn’t act weird upon seeing Felix—as much as he loved her, she had that scary tendency of slipping out too much than she should.

As soon as the front door opened and the two boys went inside, aunt Sohee popped out of the kitchen, small wrinkles painted around her eyes as she smiled widely.

Felix returned the smile and bowed respectfully. Jeongin noticed his fingers become white as he tightened his grip on the box.

He turned, clasping his sweaty palms together in a nervous attempt to compose himself. “So, this is Felix. And this is my aunt,” Jeongin announced, his voice probably coming out a bit too solemn due to his nervousness. His eyes darted between them, silently willing the introduction to go smoothly. 

Aunt Sohee beamed at the shorter boy, who once again bowed respectfully to greet her. “It’s so nice to meet you, Felix. Tell me, are you up for some bibimbap later for dinner?” she asked animatedly.

Felix’s eyes gleamed. “Oh, that would be lovely, thank you.” Then he lifted up the box he was carrying. “I— I’ve made some brownies if you'd like?” he added, casting an uncertain glance at Jeongin.

“That’s so very nice of you!” The woman chirped and took a piece when Felix opened the box. “Oh, they are truly delicious. You should give me the recipe later.”

Jeongin was busy adoring the boy’s cute cheeks, flushed with a hue of pink, when he turned to him with a nervous smile.

“Would you like some, too?” He offered him the box.

Jeongin quickly blinked himself out of the daze and nodded. “Oh, sure!”

He took a piece and munched it slowly, frowning a little to add some dramaturgy. It was fun to see the blond boy observe him nervously, so he pretended to debate over it on purpose. In fact, the brownies were amazing, perfectly chocolatey, chewy inside and a bit crispy on the edges. He could eat them forever.

Finally, he nodded his head in approval. “Not bad, young Padawan. Careful must you be, as them all I may eat,” he joked, trying to sound like Yoda.

Felix snickered and rolled his eyes, but Jeongin noticed a soft gleam litting them up too, which made his heart commit another backflip.

After taking their shoes off, Jeongin showed him around the flat a little. There wasn't too much to show, though—just where the bathroom was and a glimpse of the living room before they went to his bedroom.

It had been a few years since anyone besides Seungmin and Jisung had visited their house, yet he didn't expect it to be that awkward when he invited Felix to his room. Suddenly, he felt nervous as if he couldn’t trust his own bedroom anymore, as if it might betray him at any moment. His limbs refused to cooperate, and he stood there stiffly, more like a rusty robot than a person, awkwardly fiddling with his fingers while Felix looked around.

“Oh, cool, you like legos? It’s something from Star Wars, isn’t it?” The shorter boy asked excitedly, pointing at one of the constructions placed on the shelf.

There weren’t many of them—among his friends, Jisung was the one to be the most fixated on legos, and so he possessed the most impressive sets. Meanwhile Jeongin and Seungmin enjoyed just helping him to build them, not caring about the final effect for too long. Jeongin only owned the sets he had gotten as a gift from his friends but never bothered to buy one especially for himself.

“Yes, um, it’s the Justifier. And here’s Luke Skywalker’s X-Wing Fighter,” he added, ponting at another lego starship.

Felix nodded his head, eyes shimmering as he whispered a soft 'cool' under his breath, before turning to look at the books, tilting his head slightly as he read the titles. Jeongin observed him, amused. His heart fluttered at every question the boy asked, the stress in his body slowly letting go.

“Would you like something to drink? I’ve got water, cola… or maybe some tea?” Jeongin offered when the blond boy eventually plopped down on his bed, done with watching the room.

“Cola would be great, thanks,” Felix said and slid a laptop out of his bag. “About the project… I was thinking that maybe we could start with explaining the history of how Korea was divided into North and South. Or maybe we could briefly explain what were the main effects of the war? What do you think?”

Jeongin knitted his eyebrows while sitting beside him on the bed. He handed Felix a glass of cola which the boy took gratefully.

“I think your first idea is better. I’m not sure if we should mention the effects at all, though, somebody else will probably make a whole presentation about it.”

Felix nodded. “Right. I’ll write it down, then.” 

Soft sounds of tapping on the keyboard filled the room. Meanwhile Jeongin turned on his own laptop and flipped through one of the History manuals that he had put earlier on his desk, mostly to busy his hands with something.

“Wait, maybe we should start with a brief introduction of the war itself? It will probably add us more work to do but if we do it well then it may add some more, like, flow? I don’t know, um…” Felix ran a hand through his hair and let out a nervous chuckle. “Uh, sorry, I’m probably messing too much already.”

Jeongin shook his head immediately, straightening himself up. “No, no, no, it’s okay! We totally should brainstorm for now. And yes, starting with an introduction could work well, but just as you’ve said, let’s not make it too long.”

The heartwarming smile returned on Felix’s face as he nodded.

As they continued with work, Jeongin was almost surprised how easy it was for them both to cooperate. After exchanging some more ideas, they slowly began the research, easily sharing the material between each other. It soon turned out that while Jeongin found it easier to find the needed information and put together the pieces, Felix, on the other hand, possessed the ability to write it down in his own words, in a form engaging enough to put it on a presentation aimed for teenagers.

Time passed by and the two boys felt more and more comfortable with each other. While Jeongin somehow ended up on the floor, Felix took over the bed and lay on his stomach, swinging his legs back and forth in the air. The snacks had somehow migrated from the desk, now scattered either on the floor or on the bed as the boys kept sharing. They would laugh over some random, lame jokes, then they would groan from tiredness, and sometimes they would even engage in a serious conversation about some more interesting topics. Overall, much to Jeongin’s surprise and gratitude, it didn’t feel awkward at all—it felt warm, it felt comfortable. It felt safe.

“You know what, it’s a good thing that we arrived late together yesterday,” Felix suddenly announced, his tone light but deliberate. He looked at Jeongin with a quick glance, his fingers loosely laced together as he leaned forward slightly, resting his chin on his hands.

Just a moment ago they had decided to take a short break as their brains seemed to have gotten a bit too overheated. A few more jokes were thrown but then silence took over, until Felix decided it was time to dive into the matter in hand, the matter that yesterday had drawn an invisible line, some kind of a branch, a grapevine that kept growing and wrapping around their bodies, pulling them closer.

Jeongin looked away, unable to maintain the eye contact without going insane. He rubbed the back of his neck, then propped himself up with one hand as he shifted to sit upright. “Yeah, um, it was quite funny, wasn’t it?” He gave a quick, awkward smile, eyes still fixed somewhere just past Felix’s shoulder.

“Overall it was, I guess.” Felix chuckled and rolled onto his back with a sigh, now staring at the ceiling. “And, you know, I’m still so, so grateful for your help at the exam, really. You didn’t have to do it for me.” He tilted his head, again looking at Jeongin with those shimmering eyes.

Surely, he was going to lose his mind soon.

His fingers fidgeted in his lap, tugging at the hem of his sleeve. “It’s nothing, really. Besides, I didn’t do that much,” he mumbled, barely meeting Felix’s eyes before quickly looking away again.

Felix snorted, shaking his head with a crooked smile. “Come on, if it wasn’t for you, I would’ve failed for sure.”

A sudden knock at the door tore them from their conversation, and Jeongin wasn’t sure whether he felt relieved or a little disappointed by the interruption. The door creaked open, and Aunt Sohee’s head peeked in, adorned with a soft smile.

“Hello, boys, what would you say for a little break? Dinner’s ready.”

“Oh, awesome!” Felix grinned and hopped off the bed.

He wanted to follow the woman but suddenly he hesitated, his gaze falling on Jeongin with an unspoken question in it. Jeongin smiled encouragingly and together they walked towards the dining table that stood in the living room, leaving behind the bedroom together with the heavy cloud of their barely initiated conversation. At least for Jeongin it seemed like a cloud. The sort of cloud that brought insecurity and made the air feel thick and filled with electricity, foreshadowing an upcoming thunderstorm.

One thunderstorm was currently rampaging through his mind, thoughts once again circulating around one certain blond-haired person. But this time they were thoughts Jeongin absolutely hadn’t expected to appear. Everything he had considered to be right, suddenly started to feel wrong. It was like Felix himself had marched to the corner of his mind which he wasn’t allowed to enter, and there opened a Pandora’s box, releasing sudden doubts and concerns upon everything Jeongin had ever felt towards him. Probably the blond boy didn’t even intend to do it, he just dropped and shattered it by accident, maybe even unaware of the damage he had created. Maybe he stumbled upon his unfortunate shoelace, the same one that had crashed their lives together some time ago. Coming to think of it, that explanation made even more sense than it probably should.

Anyway, the thing was that everything Jeongin had felt towards Felix before, now seemed more like a silly crush, a piteous remnant of the past when—as much as Jeongin would hate to admit it—he had considered the blond boy to be a fantasy, an unreal creature from dreams rather than a human. And now the reality seemed to be unfolding, the clouds moving away to uncover the sun on the sky. A sun from which Jeongin found himself unable to tear his eyes away, even when it gave such a blinding light.

Chapter Text

The flat rented by Lee Haneul was placed on the last floor of the building. It had two bedrooms, a bathroom and a living room connected to a small kitchen. Whoever had designed the apartment, they had done a rather poor job when placing the windows. With the bedrooms’ door closed almost all the time, the only source of natural light remained the kitchen window placed above the sink.

Felix truly appreciated that little window, especially in the mornings. Facing east, it allowed the sun to illuminate the whole room, making it much easier for the boy to get out of bed early. Opening it slightly and pulling curtains to the side was enough to make the whole area feel a bit more pleasant and welcoming. The boy usually tried to wake up before the sunrise so that he could enjoy it in peace when preparing breakfast. Also, it was the only time of the day when his mother was not around, still asleep in her bedroom.

The thing was that the woman detested seeing the boy around, no matter what he was doing. Sometimes she would skip breakfast or even leave the flat upon seeing the boy occupying the kitchen. The sole presence of her son made her feel nauseous. She never said much about it, though, preferring to suffer in silence and soothe her annoyance with alcohol. Felix sometimes wondered if he wouldn’t rather she yelled at him instead. The fed up and disappointed glances she always sent his way were like blazes that seemed to cut too deep into him for the wounds to ever be able to fully heal.

Although Felix loved baking, his whole body tensed whenever he had to enter the kitchen. In fact, he was afraid to move around the whole flat besides his own bedroom. He was afraid of looking into his mother’s eyes and seeing nothing more than pure disappointment. He was afraid of the awkward silence and of her agitated reactions to any unintentional noise he accidentally made. Whatever he was doing, the boy always moved around the flat like a ghost, trying to be as quiet as possible and paying attention to every single movement. What was supposed to be a safe place for him, seemed to never provide safety at all.

In order to bake brownies for his meeting with Jeongin, he woke up even before the sunrise. He wanted to have as much time as possible to use the kitchen in peace, especially that he wasn’t even sure what time his mother was going to wake up. If not for the constant fear of the woman leaving her bedroom, the atmosphere would be almost magical. There were barely any noises coming from outside the window as the city was still asleep. Felix truly enjoyed the morning silence. It always made him feel as if time had stopped, together with the storm in his mind. It was delightful.

The boy was truly surprised that he managed to make the pastries without causing any noise. When his mother woke up, the brownies were already in the oven, the scent of the chocolate dough slowly filling up the room.

The woman didn’t say a word. She didn’t even look his way and immediately disappeared in the bathroom. She seemed to be in a hurry but Felix couldn’t know for sure—they hardly ever knew each other’s business.

Felix flinched when the bathroom door opened again.

“Clean the mess when you’re done,” the woman said blankly while putting her jacket on. She was already ready to leave the flat, as usual, not bothering to have any breakfast.

Already busy with wiping down the countertop, Felix turned around slightly to take a glimpse at her. Although she was standing in the foyer getting ready to leave, he was able to see her face in the dim light coming from the kitchen. The boy was relieved to see his mother sober. Wherever she was going, the place visibly required her not to show up under influence. The hangover still managed to take its toll on her face, though, making it pale and marking her eyes with dark, swollen circles.

He nodded his head in agreement, “Of course.”

Apart from the gentle swish of the cloth being brushed against the wooden surface and his mother slipping her shoes on, the flat became deadly quiet. A question hung on the boy’s tongue, as he wanted to ask where she was going, but he quickly swallowed it down. There was no point in asking as Felix was perfectly aware that there would be no answer. Some time ago, a silent pact had been established between the two of them, not to ask and not to care. It seemed the best for them both, to just share the same living space but not to interfere with one another.

Although Felix never dared to complain about it out loud, it was one of those things that made his heart twist in pain. He simply didn’t understand why things were the way they were between the two of them. He didn’t understand what he had ever done to the woman for her to hate him so much. He didn’t understand how two people living under the same roof for so many years—his whole life, to be clear—could be so distant from each other. Separated by a canion so vast, that no matter how far he jumped, he would never reach the other end.

“Would you like some brownies? For later?” He offered in a small voice, looking at her hesitantly.

The grimace he was met with in response made all the hopes in his body immediately disappear. He shouldn’t have said anything.

“I’d be better without,” she responded, clenching her jaw.

The echo of the door being closed with a loud slam resonated in his head even a moment after she left the flat.

No matter how much Felix would try not to be affected by his mother’s behavior, he always failed. Even though those words weren’t the worst he had heard—after all, they were just the words of refusal. A matter of personal preference, for sure. She could have always said something worse, something that would have hurt him to the bone—but she did not and Felix should be glad about it.

Over the years, the boy had become pretty good at silencing the little demons that sat on his shoulders and kept whispering painful memories in his ears. They possessed an astonishing skill for memorizing almost every single word that left his mother’s mouth—and then repeated them to him with no mercy. Felix usually managed to silence them with his own inner voice, sometimes simply maintaining positivity, and sometimes having to scream at them to shut up. Sometimes the battle would be peaceful and sometimes it would leave him with a lump in his throat and tears on his cheeks. Anyway, better or worse—he could handle it. At least to some extent.

Time always seemed to run faster when his mother wasn’t at home. As soon as she left, the boy proceeded to open the window and clean the kitchen. When he finished, the brownies were ready to be taken out of the oven. Felix examined them nervously and took a small bite. Fortunately, they tasted good. Now he just had to hope Jeongin would like them as well.

His knee was jittering throughout the entire bus journey to Jeongin’s neighborhood. Felix didn’t expect himself to feel so stressed about their meeting, but then it appeared as though the whole universe conspired to make his life miserable. Cleaning the rest of the flat suddenly took him more time than expected. In all the rush, the boy almost forgot to go and buy groceries for later. The fridge was almost empty and empty it would probably remain, if not for Felix who was the only person left in the household that still cared about restocking it.

The series of unfortunate events continued when his favorite T-shirt got stained with toothpaste, completely ruining his entire outfit idea. If the boy hadn’t lost his mind already, he was surely going to now, as he stood in front of his wardrobe and stared at it helplessly. Then everything spiraled into chaos, beginning with plastic boxes tumbling out of the kitchen cabinet as he reached for one to use for the brownies, followed by his bus driving away before his eyes, even though he had almost spit his lungs out while sprinting all the way to the bus stop.

Jeongin was such a sweetheart the whole time, it made Felix’s heart warm. He didn't expect the other boy to come and pick him up from the bus stop, without even the slightest sign of annoyance upon his face. What’s more, the brunette seemed to be genuinely happy to meet with Felix and do a project with him—him, out of all the people, the dumbest person ever. As if it already hadn't been enough for Felix to put him at the risk of being caught cheating when he had asked Jeongin for help during the History exam. Now, Felix felt bad for assuming the boy to be weird in the past. Yes, maybe he did act strange at school but after getting to know him better, he was one of the nicest people the blond had ever met. Jeongin just seemed to care. Genuinely.

Felix was surprised to discover that Jeongin lived solely with his aunt. Given that they were classmates, he probably should have been aware of this fact, yet it had somehow slipped his mind entirely. Instead, his thoughts were filled with numerous misconceptions about the boy, making Felix almost feel embarrassed. He couldn’t help but wonder why he had never paid much attention to Jeongin. Especially considering that Jeongin, on the other hand, appeared to be quite the contrary when it came to Felix. Always attentive, always with a smile, and never evaluative.

Although the flat was of similar dimensions to his own, the atmosphere there was entirely different. First, he was welcomed by a huge smile on aunt Sohee’s face. He couldn’t believe how someone could be so genuinely excited for him to be their guest. The woman radiated kindness and immediately made Felix feel at ease, engaging him into a small talk while in the foyer. Then, his heart fluttered again at her and Jeongin’s reaction to his brownies. No matter how insignificant it may seem, it actually meant the world to him to see that they truly appreciated his effort. And then when they started the project, surprisingly it didn’t feel like a mundane school assignment at all. Even though Jeongin was a great student and probably could do it perfectly all by himself, he still cared about Felix’s opinion and ideas. It was a nice feeling, to be appreciated. As time went by, Felix thought he hadn’t felt so safe and comfortable for a long time.

It was until aunt Sohee had called them for dinner, making the demons on his shoulder wake up and pick up their little ears.

Felix couldn’t remember the last time he had had a family dinner. At home, he didn’t eat his meals anywhere besides his bedroom, unless he was in a hurry and ate without even leaving the kitchen. Indeed, there was a dining table in the flat but Felix couldn’t stand sitting there alone, not to mention eating with his mother. It was a strange experience, therefore, to have a family dinner. He couldn’t decipher his feelings as he watched Jeongin and his aunt constantly smiling and teasing each other. Of course, he laughed with them, but at the same time, something kept gripping his gut and squeezing it, refusing to let go.

“Do you think I added a bit too much Gochujang?” Aunt Sohee asked, frowning her brows in consternation.

“No, I think it’s perfect,” Jeongin responded before shoving a huge portion of food into his mouth. Felix chuckled at the sight.

“It tastes amazing,” he added sincerely, receiving a huge smile from aunt Sohee in response. She had a beautiful smile, one that radiated warmth and sincerity.

“I’m glad you like it,” she said. “So, how is your project going?”

Felix bit his lip, uncertain about how to reply. To his mind, they had done a great job so far, but was Jeongin feeling the same way about it? He didn’t want to assume.

“It’s fine, I think,” Jeongin replied, noticing Felix’s hesitation. “There is still some research to be done but I’m glad it’s a group project. At least the presentation is almost finished and later we will just have to figure out how to show it in class.” He cast him a brief smile but then quickly blinked, his eyes fixating back on his plate. The freckled boy smiled back, regardless.

“Yeah, I think so too,” he said.

“That’s awesome, then.” The woman smiled brightly. After a few more bites of bibimbap, she looked over at Felix. “So, how’s your last year of high school treating you? Must be pretty hectic with the CSATs coming up, huh?”

Felix gave a small nod as he swallowed, his eyes turning to stare at his plate. “Yeah, it’s a bit tough… but I think it’s gonna turn out okay.” He gave a little shrug, not very eager to talk about how school was going for him.

The woman took another sip of her drink, then leaned back with a thoughtful hum. “I still remember my senior year. It was a bit chaotic, but honestly… kind of fun, too.”

Jeongin chuckled, shooting her a playful look. “Right, the legendary Detention Crew.” Noticing the confused look on Felix’s face, he quickly turned towards him to give an explanation. “She and her friends used to sit in detention almost every week for a whole year.”

Felix looked up, now genuinely curious. “Oh, really? But how– how did it even happen?”

Aunt Sohee made a dismissive gesture with her hand, frowning a little. “Don’t worry, it wasn’t that serious. But, you know, back in my day, we were all a mess during CSAT season. Everyone pretending to be chill while secretly panicking inside.” She made a dramatic gesture with her hands at which Felix snorted a soft laugh. “So yeah, we did happen to cause some trouble from time to time. What’s actually funny, I think most of my preparations for finals happened in that detention room. Nobody wanted to waste the precious free time after so we just established a pact to study there and then have fun outside. Turned out to be a great plan, actually.”

“A place full of great ideas, too,” Jeongin teased, causing the woman to roll her eyes playfully.

“Well, yes, we all did enjoy to go and blow off some steam from time to time. So, after all the sleepless nights of cramming and stressing over, we were just done. It was right after the last exam that almost everyone from my year decided to gather on a beach and have a party. We had been planning it for weeks in that detention room, I think it was what actually kept us going. And I guess we all just craved some freedom, a time and place where we could just… stop caring anymore. Even if only for a while.” The woman chuckled. “Well, the police almost got us in the end, but you know… It was all worth it.” She sighed. “The exams were draining, but when I look back on it now… It was a crazy period. It was… good to have this special moment to end it all.”

 “But they didn’t get you, right?” Felix asked.

Aunt Sohee shook her head with a soft laugh. “No, no, they didn’t, fortunately. We all managed to flee the scene before they arrived.”

“God, I don’t think I would have the guts to run away from the police.” He shook his head with amusement and a little bit of admiration.

Aunt Sohee nodded. “Right, not very responsible of us, but who would have thought they would actually bother?”

Felix slowly nodded his head but his thoughts were already sailing somewhere else. The vision of the Summer Party reappeared, having been thrown into a corner after the hurtful words of Hyunjin. Maybe it didn’t seem as big as an illegal beach party on the last day of exams but Felix truly believed it held an equally important purpose. A party for them to celebrate the last moment of peace before actually starting their endless cramming for finals. He truly believed it could bring people together, especially that there wouldn’t be much time to have fun so carelessly afterwards. 

“Well, enough about me.” Aunt Sohee shifted in her seat, noticing the sudden change in Felix's behavior as his mind had wandered far away. “How do you feel about it all? Already gearing up for the final year?”

The boy nervously busied himself with a spoonful of bibimbap, even before the woman had finished talking. He suddenly felt small, even fragile, unsure how to respond. Even though aunt Sohee was one of the nicest people he had ever met, he simply felt intimidated to talk about school with her. It was Jeongin’s home after all, and Jeongin himself was one of the smartest students in their school. What interesting Felix had to say about school next to somebody like him? Honestly, it was better for everyone if he kept his mouth shut.

He looked down at his plate and mindlessly poked his chopsticks at the food. “I… I’m not sure. I think I will start preparing more during summer.”

The feeling of regret struck him as soon as the words left his mouth. It was obvious that if he wanted to pass the exams well, he should have already started preparing, even a few months ago. Waiting for summer was literally the worst thing to do and most of the students usually started their preparations right before the beginning of the school year, or even earlier. Felix wasn’t even sure why he still hadn’t started, but at the same time, he didn’t even know how. He barely managed to keep up with his school assignments already and even if he would like to start learning for finals, his school president-duties and his job remained his biggest priorities.

He used to be convinced that it was a good plan. Earning some credits for organizing school events. Saving money for the future so that he would be able to move out. And somehow, the CSAT exams had completely slipped his mind in all this madness.

Felix didn’t dare to look up, keeping his focus on the food in front of him. He had a feeling he probably came off as reckless—maybe even stupid. The more he thought about it, the more this whole ‘plan’ seemed like a road to failure.

Aunt Sohee cleared her throat after a moment. “Well, that's—”

“Felix is the school president,” Jeongin cut in quickly, almost choking on his food. He swallowed it hard and then continued. “He, um, he takes care of the Summer Party. And manages the school council. Oh, and all the inter-school competitions, that's on him too.” He blinked rapidly, casting a shy glance at Felix, then reached out for his glass and took a large sip.

The freckled boy looked up, surprised that Jeongin knew all that. He took part in organizing important inter-school competitions, yes, but he had no idea anybody paid attention. He wasn’t even sure if he had ever seen Jeongin participate in any of that often. It might have happened a few times when it came to more important science competitions but it still wasn’t much in comparison to his friend, Seungmin. Teachers usually had to try really hard to convince the boy to participate in anything, especially in this final year, and yet he still managed to get his way out of it with some flimsy excuses.

It seemed like the heavy cloud that had appeared above the table, evaporated at Jeongin’s words. Aunt Sohee was beaming again, now looking at the freckled boy with genuine curiosity.

“Oh, really? That must be a lot to maintain,” she noticed.

Felix slowly nodded. “Well, I… I just…” He gestured his hands helplessly, trying to find the proper words. “I thought that even if I’m not the best student then I might try to gain some credits as the school president. I… I’ve read on the Internet that it might be useful for university.”

“I’m sure they will appreciate it. It might be a good idea to mention it in an application letter or something,” Aunt Sohee suggested and Felix nodded with a smile. A small feeling of hope grew in his body that maybe his plan could actually work. “And what is this Summer Party about? Jeongin has mentioned it earlier but I'm not sure I understand it well… Is it like a school party or something more casual?”

Felix hesitated for a moment, Hyunjin’s words still reverberating in his mind, as if to keep him on his toes. He glanced at Jeongin, wishing he could read his thoughts and discover if the boy shared the view of his friend that it was a stupid idea nobody cared about. Unfortunately, Yang Jeongin wasn’t the easiest person to read. Even when their eyes mey, the only thing Felix could see was a glint of curiosity, as the boy observed him together with aunt Sohee, waiting for his response.

His gaze hung on Jeongin for a moment before he looked back at the woman and continued. “I thought it might be a good way to… make high school feel special. Something that could give people nice memories apart from all that exam stress. I wanted to make something similar to prom but that wouldn't make much sense before the exams so I figured making something before summer holidays might work the best for everyone. I know it's not popular in Korea but people seemed happy when I announced the idea.” He blushed a little. “It was a part of my election campaign.”

Aunt Sohee looked truly amused. “And the headmaster just agreed like that?”

Felix shrugged but he couldn’t stop the smile taking over his lips. “He had to. Most of the students had signed the petition and when I became the school president, then well, it would be just him against almost the whole school.”

Aunt Sohee said something else, but the words faded into the background as Felix’s eyes drifted to Jeongin, quietly hoping for some kind of sign—anything to show that, for once in his life, the path he had chosen was the right one. Felix was fed up with all the worries and insecurities that kept swirling around in his head, messing with his every thought. He was tired of second-guessing everything. 

And then, when Jeongin’s warm gaze finally met his, his heart felt so much lighter.

𒌐

“Can I ask you something?”

They were back in Jeongin’s bedroom but Felix found himself unable to focus even for five minutes. The screen of his laptop seemed too bright and fonts turned into a blur before his eyes, distracting him from the task at hand. Instead, his mind kept drifting away, still disturbed after their conversation during dinner.

Jeongin took the same spot on the floor as earlier, with his back resting against the frame of the bed, which instead was occupied by Felix who sprawled out on a pile of pillows. At first, Felix was reluctant to settle back on the furniture while the other boy was stuck in such an uncomfortable position. However, Jeongin claimed he had nothing against it and eventually the vision of snuggling between the cushions won over the sense of justice.

From up there, he had a perfect view at the brunette who seemed too focused on the presentation to notice the other boy staring. Felix couldn’t help but keep glancing at him again and again, while the gears turned loudly in his head, creating more and more questions that now hung on the tip of his tongue, waiting for the right moment to be released.

Jeongin took his eyes off the screen and turned to face Felix. “Sure, what is it?”

The boy put his laptop on the bed and rose up to a sitting position, crossing his legs. His fingers fiddled with his rings as he hesitated, unsure how to form his doubts into a comprehensible sentence. “Do you think that the Summer Party is, um… dumb?”

The question itself felt dumb when he pronounced it out loud but the worry had grown too big to ignore. Hyunjin’s words from a few days ago still lingered in his head and the story told by aunt Sohee only brought back the memory. Felix needed to finally share it with somebody, otherwise it would eat him alive.

Jeongin knitted his brows. “No, why?”

Felix shifted, pulling one knee up to his chest and scratching it as he wrapped one arm around it. “I just– I don’t know. My, um– I heard some students saying it’s not such a big deal. I mean, yeah, I know it’s not a big deal but I was thinking that… maybe I care too much about it while for others it’s just a stupid high school party and–” He took a shaky breath and shook his head. “I don’t know. I just don’t know what to think about it anymore.”

The brunette observed him for a moment, chewing on the inside on his cheek. Then he put his laptop away and moved up to sit next to him on the edge of the bed, leaving some space between them.

“I like what you said about it earlier,” he began slowly. “That you want it to make high school special, just like that beach party my aunt told us about. I don’t know who these students were, but from what I’ve heard, people seem quite excited about it.”

Felix clicked his tongue and made and gestured his hands awkwardly, as if it could help him to convey what he couldn’t express with words. “But what if they would rather do something like your aunt did, illegal and with alcohol? At school there will be no alcohol but teachers everywhere. What if I'm just making it a hassle for everyone to participate, when they'd rather spend that time doing their own thing?”

Jeongin shook his head, frowning a little. “I wouldn’t worry about that. Someone for sure is going to throw an after-party. Besides, it’s not like anyone is actually obligated to come, right?” He adjusted his position and looked at him with a glint in his eye. “Listen, what actually matters is that you organize it for credits, right? Just do it the best way you can, and if some people don’t like it, then screw them. Sometimes you just… you just have to do your thing and not worry about others.”

The blonde nodded, taking his words in, but his fingers kept fiddling with the edge of his gray hoodie. “How about you, are you planning to go?” he asked after a moment of hesitation.

Jeongin blinked and turned his gaze to stare at the floor. “I– uh, yes. W-with my friends, probably, yeah. And you?” he blurted out and jerked his head at him. Then he let out a nervous giggle before Felix could even respond. “I mean, of course you will be there, too, it’s your party, after all. Sorry.”

The corners of Felix’s mouth lifted as he nodded. “Right, yeah, I can’t miss it, I’m kind of in charge.” He cracked a soft smile. “It wouldn’t be the best advertisement if I didn’t go.”

Jeongin gave a small nod, his smile lingering. “Need to make sure everything goes perfect, right?”

 Stealing a glance, Felix just now realized that his eyes turned into crescents whenever he smiled. It made a wave of warmth bloom under his skin.

He allowed his gaze to linger on him for a moment longer. “Yeah, exactly that.”

Silence settled between them but it didn’t feel awkward—at least not to Felix. Their conversation had already brought so much peace and comfort to his overthinking brain that a moment of pause felt comfortable too. It felt good just to sit next to Jeongin, like sitting by the ocean at sunset.

“Sorry for bringing it up but, um– it just messes with my head sometimes,” he admitted after a moment.

Jeongin turned his head and nudged him slightly. “You think a lot, huh?”

The blonde cracked a smile, locking their eyes together. “You have no idea.”

He nudged the boy back with his shoulder, a smile tugging at his lips. Moments later, they were pushing each other playfully, barely holding back laughter. Felix wasn’t sure what made him do it, but before he realized, his hands reached out to tickle Jeongin. Jeongin squirmed and laughed loudly, nearly tumbling off the bed.

The fun stopped abruptly when a painful grimace spread across Jeongin’s face. Felix froze and quickly pulled his hands away.

“Wha– What happened? Did I hurt you?” The blonde’s eyes widened with concern as he stared at him.

“No, no, it’s nothing, just, um–” Jeongin’s eyes flickered around the room nervously as his hand pressed against the skin on his waist. He shifted on the bed a little, sliding away from Felix. Then he suddenly stood up and pointed at the door. “I need to go to the bathroom, just give me a second. I’ll be right back.”

He left the room before Felix could even blink.

Shit.

Felix wiped his face with his palm, frustrated and confused. Just when things were starting to get better, of course he had to fuck something up. The boy was visibly hurt, maybe he had an accident or something and Felix unfortunately aimed right at the wound. He even considered following the boy, but really it wouldn’t even make much sense right now. It was better if he just waited here.

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, standing up to pace around the bedroom nervously. He was so stupid, he shouldn’t have started that conversation in the first place. Now not only was Jeongin hurt, but they also fell behind with the project. Just great.

A few minutes had passed but Jeongin wasn’t coming back. Felix was almost on the verge of losing his mind while trying to decide whether he should follow him or not, when suddenly he heard a muffled sound of his phone buzzing in his backpack. The constant beeps were hard to ignore so he kneeled down on the floor and rummaged in his bag until he found the device. Notifications were popping up on the screen like crazy, and as expected, guided him to his group chat with Minho, Changbin, and Hyunjin. What surprised him though, was the fact that the messages were mostly from Minho, who rather wasn’t the type to spam there so much. The only exception was when he randomly sent them pics or videos of his cats. But this time it definitely wasn’t about cats.

Felix needed a moment to grasp what was happening. He scrolled down the chat, feeling nervousness rise in his body as he learned about the events from last night.

It took him a while to decipher the meaning behind the messages as they were all written rather hastily, with multiple repetitions and errors. He didn’t understand most of it and so didn’t Changbin and Hyunjin, as he deduced from their responses. Eventually, Minho decided to record a voice message.

Felix glanced around the room, making sure the door was closed. He brought his phone up, keeping the speaker close to his ear. The sound of wind muffled Minho’s words as he spoke, making him frown in focus.

“I’m just coming back home from halmeoni. Guys, you won’t believe this. There was a robbery at her store, in the middle of the night. I went there as soon as I heard the shooting, but shit, Spider-Man was already there and he handled those guys, he literally glued them to the ceiling, like, with his web! It was all over when I arrived so I didn’t see much, but shit, one of those guys must have shot him… He said he was okay but I’m not sure, honestly. His side looked nasty.”

Shit, Spider-Man got shot? Felix knitted his brows and took the phone away from his ear, joining Hyunjin and Changbin in the hectic spam of messages. They fired multiple questions at poor Minho who tried his best to explain what had happened but even his knowledge was narrow. Fortunately, his grandmother was all right but the boy had no idea whether the superhero was safe.

Felix bit on the skin around his nails unconsciously as he hurriedly searched the Internet for any information. He found some articles on the robbery but there was nothing about Spider-Man’s well-being or whereabouts. Some of the sites didn’t even mention the sole fact that he got hurt in the first place.

The blonde sighed and switched back to the group chat to make sure Minho was okay. That must have been a terrifying day. The boy seemed a little jittery but he claimed he was fine. His grandmother was safe, it was all that mattered. The police had already taken care of the thieves as they arrived soon after receiving the call. Then Minho took the woman to his house where together with his parents they made sure she was feeling well. Fortunately, she was a strong woman and from Minho’s description it seemed like he was the one to be much more emotional about the whole situation than her.

Felix flinched when the door to the bedroom opened. He quickly switched his phone off and looked up at Jeongin who stumbled inside the room. He seemed a bit better now, although the skin on his face was still pale. Felix quickly stood up from the bed.

“Hey, I’m sorry, I didn’t want to hurt you,” he blurted out.

Jeongin quickly waved a hand. “It’s fine, seriously. Just—ah, I kind of… fell off my skateboard yesterday. The scrape must’ve reopened or something.” He blinked, clearly realizing how awkward that sounded. “Uh, yeah. No big deal.”

They stared at each other and Jeongin gulped. Felix felt his mind spinning, the gears in his brain almost screeching. His gaze fell to the other’s shirt, now stained with small, red spots. Blood.

“O-oh,” he said eventually. “That… sucks.”

“Yeah,” Jeongin breathed out.

Felix hesitated, a strange feeling settling in his stomach. Something about Jeongin’s reaction didn’t sit right, but he pushed it aside. “Are you sure you’re okay? You look a little pale… Should I get your aunt? Maybe she could–”

“Oh, no, no, no, no, it’s nothing, really! There’s no need to call her.” Jeongin raised his hands, his voice coming out in a rush.

The sudden reaction surprised Felix. It was all so confusing but he couldn’t figure out why. However, neither did he want to make the boy uncomfortable. After all, he knew too well how chaotic and uncertain a family could be, no matter how flawless it appeared on the surface.

He blinked, then cleared his throat. “Okay… Maybe we should just sit down for now. Are you cold? I think you should drink some water.”

He spun around himself a few times while looking around the room for water, and quickly reached for the bottle as soon as he spotted it on the desk. Jeongin sat on the bed and again tried to convince the blond that he was okay but the boy politely ignored him. He filled one of the glasses and handed it to Jeongin, while taking a seat next to him. The boy took it without any further objections.

The room went silent again but Felix barely noticed, as he was too far with his thoughts. Minho’s voice message echoed within his head, trying to bring his attention to something, but Felix couldn’t point out what. Too many things had happened at the same time and it made him feel dizzy.

He glanced around the room and his sight fell on a blue blanket put in the corner of the bed. He turned around and again looked at Jeongin. His palm slowly reached towards the boy and gently touched the skin on his hand. “You’re cold,” he noticed.

Jeongin turned his head, surprised by the sudden touch. Before he could react, Felix grabbed the blanket and gently put it on the boy’s shoulders.

“Is it better now?”

“Yes, um, thank you,” Jeongin responded, his voice coming out a bit hoarse. A smattering of pink appeared on his cheeks, making Felix even more worried.

“Would you like to lay down? I can go home if you need to rest,” Felix suggested, his brows furrowed in concern. 

To be honest, going back home was the last thing he wanted to do right now. Most of the time he got there very late as he would either be at work or out in the city with his friends. The thing was that his mother despised seeing him home too early. She didn’t like to be disturbed, especially when her… guests were around. But then, she didn’t like him coming back too late either. It was a strange arrangement, and sometimes Felix wondered if she ever wished to see him there at all.

Jeongin shook his head. “We still have a project to work on. How about we go on for two more hours and at least finish the slides?” he asked.

Felix looked at him doubtfully. “Are you sure you can do it? It’s really okay if you need to rest. The project can wait.”

“For sure I’ll feel better when we finally wrap it up,” he let out a small laugh but literally after a second he opened his eyes wide at the realization and floundered. “That is– I, I mean the project, not that I don’t like spending time with you, of course I do. That is, it’s great that we’re working on it together and–” 

He went on rambling Felix just couldn’t help but laugh. He put his hand on Jeongin’s shoulder to calm him down before his mind could wander into any further mess.

“I’m glad that we’re doing it together, too,” he replied softly. “So, let’s finish it already, hm?”

Eventually, they grabbed their laptops and settled on the opposite sides of the bed, trying to focus back on the presentation. The atmosphere between them had changed, as if something heavy was hanging in the air. Felix stared at the presentation but his head was empty. Or rather filled with everything else but useful ideas.

He heard Jeongin tap on his keyboard but it didn’t sound convincing either. After a moment, he stood up and walked towards his wardrobe. The freckled boy observed him curiously as he took another blanket of the same color that the one he was wrapped in.

Jeongin turned to face him with an abashed smile. “I thought you would like one too.”

The fluttering that bloomed in Felix’s stomach was no joke this time.

“Thank you, I appreciate that.” He flashed a thankful smile at him and covered himself with the blanket. It was soft and cozy, and it smelled a bit like Jeongin, too.

Jeongin got back to work but it took some time for Felix to regain his focus. He peered at the other boy, wondering. The brunette looked innocent, a bit tired. There were some pimples on his skin and a small cut on his chin, already healing.

Realizing that he was staring, Felix quickly tore his gaze away and back to his laptop. He scolded himself mentally and focused on the presentation. He needed to finally stop assuming things about other people.

As if it was that easy.

It took some time to transit into a productive state, but eventually the focus of both boys was mainly on the schoolwork. Again, they easily shared the tasks among themselves, with barely any discussion needed as they almost instinctively settled on what they did the best. The conversation bloomed only after some time, when they again needed to exchange some ideas. Soon, the air between them cleared, the remnants of the previous uneasiness slowly dissolving.

As the sun headed down towards the horizon behind the window, they managed to get almost all the slides done. Comfortable silence surrounded them, interrupted only by the gentle sounds of tapping on the keyboard. Now they were left only with the last improvements, Felix focused on the visual appeal of the presentation and Jeongin making sure that they included all the necessary information. The sky was already dark when they exchanged glances from above their laptops, tired but clearly satisfied.

Felix wiped his face with his hands and groaned. “Fucking hell, I’m exhausted. Can’t believe we’re finally done.”

“Mrs. Kim will be amazed, I’m sure of that. She has to be,” Jeongin stated before raising himself up and closing his laptop. “Would you like something to eat?”

The freckled boy hesitated and checked the time on his phone. It was already late and soon his bus was going to arrive. No matter how much he would appreciate staying longer, it was high time for him to leave. Besides, he didn’t want to outstay Jeongin’s welcome.

“I would love to but I think I should get going now,” Felix announced and scratched his arm awkwardly.

“Ah, right, sure.” The brunette nodded and stared at his bed for a moment before unwrapping himself from the blanket and putting it aside. “I will walk you to the bus stop then,” he said and stood up.

Felix leaned forward to get off the bed and almost fell, getting stuck in his blanket. “Wait, what?” he asked while clumsily trying to free himself from the troublesome material. “You should stay, you can’t go out like that.”

“Like what?” Jeongin asked, giving him a clueless expression as he grabbed a jacket, already putting it on.

The blonde boy stumbled, surprised. He finally got off the bed, now standing there hesitantly and feeling a bit lost—confused.

“I– I mean…” He made an awkward gesture at the boy next to him but now that he looked at him, he was stunned to notice that there was no sign of his previous condition. His face regained its colors and the happy sparkles were back shimmering in his eyes.

“C’mon, Lix, I’m fine now. And I’m letting you walk alone in the dark.” Jeongin announced and opened the door, inviting him to go first.

Felix’s heart fluttered at the nickname but he didn’t let it show. He rolled his eyes, knowing that Jeongin probably wouldn’t give up anyway, and gathered his belongings back into his bag.

“You should stay, I’m being serious. I’m not a child,” he added, maintaining a serious expression, while passing him in the threshold.

Jeongin just shrugged, following after him. “You’re not a child, you’re my guest.”

After saying goodbye to Aunt Sohee, they left the building and strolled slowly toward the bus stop. The night was quiet, filled only with the gentle rustle of leaves and the occasional hush of passing cars. A soft breeze brushed against Felix’s skin, sending a pleasant shiver down his spine.

“The moon looks nice today,” Jeongin observed quietly, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

Felix glanced up and marveled at the sight. It was indeed breathtaking, huge and bright. A scattering of soft, stray clouds surrounded it, making the view truly spectacular.

“It’s beautiful,” he quietly responded.

Felix felt a sting of disappointment when they reached the bus stop. He turned to face Jeongin and tilted his head to the side.

“Text me when you get home,” he ordered, fixing his eyes on the boy. His features looked really pretty in the moonlight. “You really should take some rest now.”

“I will, don’t worry,” Jeongin answered, staring down as he swiped his foot against the ground, tracing some invisible patterns. A few dark strands of hair curled onto his forehead. “And the same goes for you, okay? Don’t think too much again,” he added and looked up, locking their eyes together.

As Felix stared at the boy, his mind again filled with questions. A familiar feeling swept against him but again he couldn’t pinpoint the reason. Maybe if he had more time, he would have asked. He never got the chance though, as his bus appeared from round the corner, making them both turn their heads that way.

“Thank you for the brownies, by the way,” Jeongin added as the bus headed towards them. “They were really good.”

Felix hoped that the blush on his cheeks was not visible in the night. “Thanks,” he smiled. “Thank you for inviting me. And for helping me on the exam.”

“It was nothing, really.”

The bus stopped in front of them and Felix sighed, one last time glancing at the other boy. “Goodnight.”

Jeongin smiled softly. “Goodnight.”

As Felix climbed inside the vehicle and slipped into a seat by the window, he felt his heart pounding in his chest. Jeongin observed him from the other side, waving his hand gently. The blonde glued to the window and chuckled as he waved back until the bus set off, leaving Jeongin behind.

He might have disappeared from the sight but he did not from Felix’s head. Left alone with his thoughts, all the dots and loose threads started to come into place. And his heart pounded as the realization struck him—that there might be more about Yang Jeongin than he had expected before.

Chapter Text

Jeongin had greatly overestimated his healing abilities, it seemed.

The gunshot wound had taken him out of action for the entire weekend. The skin on his ribs had been literally ripped in two, and apparently, the stitches weren’t enough to save him from the pain—especially not when he forgot himself and made any sudden movements. Not to mention that he had almost torn the stitches apart when trying to dodge Felix and his tickle attack. The memory made him cringe every time he recalled his own reaction. Felix must have thought he had lost his mind. Still, Jeongin had to admit his heart flip-flopped at the memory of how concerned he seemed about him.

Anyway, in his current condition, playing a superhero remained completely out of the question. The decision wasn’t easy and a constant unease loomed large in his mind as he imagined the worst scenarios about what could happen while he was off duty. Unable to patrol the city on his own, Jeongin had pulled an all-nighter on Saturday night, catching up with the news and eavesdropping on police radio dispatches. It had taken him some time to figure out how to enable his own devices to pick the right radio transmissions but in the end it turned out to be much easier than he expected. But hearing the usual crime reports, which used to set him on his feet and ready to fly out the window, now put him in a rather depressed state since he was unable to react. Unfortunate as it was, this time it was his body that called the shots, and if the boy wanted to return to the battleground soon, he had no other choice but to comply.

At least, it had been easy to convince Aunt Sohee that he must have caught a cold when walking Felix to the bus stop. Obviously, he couldn’t share with her the real reason why he needed to stay home, but fortunately even such a flimsy excuse was enough to put her on the overprotective mode. She cooked him his favorite soup, made sure to give him some vitamins, and ordered him not to move much and rest properly. Jeongin didn’t complain though, especially when they spent the Sunday evening together on the couch, wrapped in warm blankets and watching his aunt’s favorite dramas.

A few more coughs and he was allowed to stay home on Monday, too. As soon as his aunt left for work, he jumped out of bed and dug out his spider-suit from under the pile of clothes in his wardrobe. He grimaced at the sight of the ripped material, stained with blood and dirt. It looked just as awful as he expected but, fortunately, it was nothing he couldn’t handle.

Before the spider-bite incident, he had been the clumsiest person when it came to even holding a thread and a needle. When he was a child, his mother would try to teach him the art of tailoring but his hands always shook and dropped the tools. Even making a straight seam seemed impossible. Everything had changed when he gained his superpowers, as becoming an excellent tailor somehow came with the package. Apart from supernatural strength and heightened senses, his hands were also gifted with incredible precision and finesse when it came to craft.

Aunt Sohee couldn’t be more surprised when one evening Jeongin came to the living room with a smile dancing on his lips and asked her to teach him how to sew. Soon, it became their little thing to sit on the couch together and gossip while the woman shared with him everything she knew about tailoring. The boy was cautious enough not to reveal his sudden abilities and made sure to convince Aunt Sohee that it was all thanks to her help. This was actually half-truth because he would have never been able to teach himself all the information he had learned from the woman.

“Your mother was an excellent tailor,” she had told him one day when the downpour on the outside had left them no other choice than to stay home. Such weather always made Aunt Sohee nostalgic. “She had always wanted to become a fashion designer, you know?”

Jeongin had observed her from his corner on the couch. They hardly ever brought up the topic of his parents as they had died too long ago for the boy to remember anything more than some blurred glimpses of their smiles in his memories. Only sometimes Aunt Sohee would mention something about them, but usually reminiscing about her sister brought too much pain.

“I guess you inherited her talent.” A small smile appeared on her face as she pointed at the crochet beanie that he was almost finished with.

“Maybe it’s just in our blood. You’ve said that grandma was a great seamstress, wasn’t she?”

“Oh, she was. They both would be proud of you now.”

Sometimes Jeongin wondered if it could have been his grandmother to send the radioactive spider on his path—everything to save the family’s name from the disgrace that his zero tailoring skills could have brought.

It was almost afternoon when he finished repairing the costume. His body ached from sitting in one place for so long and he felt almost grateful when the sole action of cleaning the room required him to move. Making use of the free time he had, he decided to tidy up the floors in the entire flat. When he was done, his stomach grumbled demandingly. He didn’t dare to enter the kitchen though—otherwise he and his aunt would have probably ended up not only without dinner, but also with a kitchen in shambles.

Jeongin had barely finished cleaning the flat when the front door opened, followed by loud chattering of three people. He already knew that his friends were going to visit him later, as they announced it as soon as they found out that Jeongin was taking a day off from school. It was an unwritten rule among the three of them, that they always visited each other whenever one of them fell sick (unless it was something contagious, of course).

Aunt Sohee planted a kiss on his forehead as soon as he stepped into the foyer. “Hello, my dear, are you feeling any better now?”

“It’s fine. The restart is almost done, I guess,” he joked, making her smile fondly.

“I can’t believe you left us for a whole day! On Monday!” Jisung groaned and placed the back of his hand to his forehead, like a dramatic princess he was. Then his mouth formed into a pout as he leaned forward for a hug. “We missed you so much.”

“You didn’t miss much, though,” announced Seungmin, following Aunt Sohee to the kitchen, helping her carry groceries. “Same boring day, as usual.”

Jisung lifted his head up. “Oh, I wouldn’t say it was that boring.”

Seungmin cast him a warning glare but it didn’t help much as his cheeks had already deceived him, turning pink. Jeongin tilted his head curiously but decided to leave his questions for later.

After helping Aunt Sohee with the groceries, they soon ended up in Jeongin’s bedroom to get their homework done as soon as possible. As always, Seungmin occupied the safe spot by Jeongin’s desk, leaving him to deal with the clingy Jisung who somehow always ended up using one of them as a pillow.

“What did you guys get in the fourth exercise?” The boy asked, sprawled on the bed with his head resting on Jeongin’s thigh. Jeongin couldn’t help but wonder how on Earth he was comfortable doing Math homework while lying on his back, but he decided not to ask.

“I got D,” said Seungmin, not lifting his gaze up from his notebook.

“Same,” Jeongin added.

Jisung groaned and crossed out his calculations.

“Maybe you would get it right if you sat up properly,” Jeongin muttered, feeling his legs slowly start to go numb.

“Nah, I will just wait until your wisdom transfers onto me.” He blew him a kiss, receiving a grimace in response.

They continued with the exercises, but after getting two more answers wrong, Jisung announced that his brain was too tired for Math and ordered a break.

“Let’s talk about your little weekend date instead,” he suggested, patting Jeongin’s thigh and pointing his finger at him. “I want to know everything.”

Jeongin rolled his eyes but he knew his cheeks had already betrayed him. “First of all, it wasn’t a date,” he explained, annoyed. Jisung didn’t seem to care as he poked his fingers into his stomach with a teasing smile. Jeongin grabbed his wrists and cast him a warning glare. “Stop it or go and find yourself another pillow.”

“Noo!” The other boy groaned dramatically and rolled to the side, now embracing poor Jeongin with all his might. “I’m sorry, I love you. I just want to know how it went.”

Jeongin bit his lip, thinking. “It was nice, actually. Working together. But he seemed very nervous about it all.”

 “About what?”

He shrugged. “School in general, I think. Grades, finals. Uni. I just– I want to help but I don’t know how,” he admitted, tilting his head back with a sigh.

Jisung groaned. “Jesus, you’re literally a nerd school genius. Just go and offer him to study together or something. I mean, look at Seungmin.” 

He waved his hand at the boy by the desk and only then Jeongin realized that Seungmin wasn’t listening to them at all. He was glued to his phone, typing something with a small smile playing in the corner of his lips.

Jeongin arched an eyebrow. “Hey, who are you texting?”

As Seungmin lifted his head up with confusion, Jisung burst into laughter and threw a pillow at him.

“It must be Changbin, isn’t it?” He smacked his lips, excited.

Jeongin glanced between the two of them, confused. “Changbin? Why Changbin?” He recognized Changbin as one of Felix’s friends, obviously. They weren’t in the same class but somehow always hung out together.

Seungmin shrugged, finally putting his phone down. “He just asked me for help with his studies and Jisung decided to make a big deal out of it.”

Jisung gasped and planted his hands on his chest in a dramatic gesture. “Who– What!? How dare you, Kim Seungmin? I’m not making a big deal out of it—it is a big deal! And I’m not letting you miss such an opportunity!” He shook his head in disbelief and then nudged Jeongin. “Changbin asked him out for a coffee, can you believe that?”

Now it was Jeongin’s turn for his jaw to drop. “No way.”

Seungmin rolled his eyes. “Knock it off, guys. I’m literally just helping him study.”

Jisung sighed and lay back down, gazing dreamingly at the ceiling. “I wish Minho would ask me to help him.”

Seungmin scoffed, amused. “Yeah, sure. To help him fail Math.”

Jeongin felt his stomach tie into a knot at the mention of the boy’s name.

“Is Minho okay?” he blurted out before he could think.

Jisung frowned. “What do you mean ‘okay’?”

Oh shit. It seemed like nobody had heard about what had happened at the store. It was now that Jeongin realized he hadn’t seen anything on the news, either—not even one mention of Spider-Man getting shot, nothing. Normally, he would go viral somewhere on the Internet, as almost always a random witness would record his actions and publish them online. Then he would be on the news, sometimes shown as a hero and sometimes as a villain whose only aim was to make the police’s job miserable. Either way, there was always something, but this time it seemed like nobody had seen the scene.

Well, nobody but Minho and his grandmother.

“He seemed fine at school today,” Seungmin noticed but his stare on Jeongin was firm and speculative.

“C’mon, what happened? Why would he not be okay?” Jisung tugged his sleeve with a worried expression.

Jeongin fiddled with his fingers, mad at his own stupidity. He shouldn’t have said anything, especially not when Minho had done him a favor by keeping his mouth shut about what had happened. Which was actually very reasonable and kind of him because now when Jeongin thought about it, it could only bring him trouble if the news that he was injured (or rather his alter ego, to be precise) got spread around the city. He shivered at the sole thought.

“I– I heard from Felix that, um… something bad happened to Minho’s grandmother,” he explained as vaguely as possible. It was a safe scenario to play off, having heard about it from Felix.

“What? Is she okay?” The stare of Jisung’s glimmering eyes was unbearable.

He slowly nodded. “Yes, they’re alright. Nobody got hurt, I think, Felix said Spider-Man got there in time. They were probably just shocked.”

“His grandmother runs a grocery store, am I right?” Seungmin asked and Jeongin confirmed with a nod. 

“Yes, there was a robbery apparently, on Friday night,” Jeongin continued nervously. Yet, it somehow felt good to tell somebody about it, even just a little bit. To get it all off his chest. “I think they had guns, that’s why Minho came, he heard a shot.” He hesitated. “But Spider-Man took care of them, as far as I know.”

“Shit, I can’t believe somebody just went and harassed an old lady.” Seungmin shook his head in disbelief.

Jisung brought his knees up to his chest. “Poor Minho, he must have been terrified,” he said quietly.

“It’s a good thing Spider-Man saved them, huh? Who knows what could have happened before the police would manage to arrive,” Seungmin noted.

Jeongin didn’t say anything, only nodded in agreement. He had already said enough and he knew he was lucky that his friends didn’t inquire further about what exactly had happened and why he knew about it. He really needed to learn how to keep his mouth shut. This time he could just brush it off and claim that it had been Felix to tell him about it all. But he could never be sure that next time the circumstances would be just as favorable.

Jisung sighed and leaned in close, curling into Jeongin's side. “You know guys, sometimes I forget how good it feels to… feel safe,” he mumbled almost incoherently.

Jeongin understood what he meant. For once, he was glad to return the boy’s embrace. “You have nothing to worry about, Ji,” he said, pulling the boy closer.

“But you never know when something bad is going to happen, right? Or if there will be someone to save you.” He was now staring down at his hands, fiddling with his fingers.

Jeongin glanced up at Seungmin, uncertain and at a loss for words. It sometimes just happened that Jisung would go dramatic about something and overthink about scenarios that were very unlikely to happen. Among the three of them, he was the one the most unreal, never really touching the ground with the soles of his feet. It was Jeongin’s and Seungmin’s job to pull him down to Earth.

“Let’s focus on facts, okay? From what we know, Minho and his grandmother are all safe and sound. Nothing happened to anyone, Spider-Man saved them. So there’s nothing to worry about,” Seungmin summarized with a calming voice. “Well, you still should worry about finals, though,” he added lightly after a pause.

Jisung nodded his head. There was a moment of silence, all of them feeling somewhat uncertain. Jeongin stared blankly at the wall, his arm wrapped around Jisung and fingers playing with his hair, while the thoughts in his head were becoming darker and darker. A heavy sensation filled his chest again.

“I don’t wanna do Math anymore. Can we watch a movie?” Jisung asked, breaking the silence.

Seungmin sighed and closed his notebook before jumping on the bed next to them. “Sure, I’m done with it, too.”

He nestled on the other side of Jisung, causing the boy to smile fondly and turn a bit in his direction to embrace him as well. Jeongin let out a laugh at the sight of a grimace on Seungmin’s face, as he reluctantly patted Jisung’s head, and slid down the bed to grab his laptop. When he returned, Jisung made sure to cuddle both of them evenly.

“Can we watch Ghostbusters this time?” Jisung asked.

“Works for me,” Seungmin agreed.

“Sure, let me put it on.”

But as the movie rolled on, Jeongin didn’t give it even a single thought.

𒌐

Things quickly got back to their usual pace as soon as Jeongin returned to school. Nonetheless, he still remained on a break from his Spider-Man duties, which had given him a huge amount of free time to spend with his friends. Jisung was absolutely thrilled about it and insisted on going out almost every day. It was only thanks to Seungmin’s rationality that they hadn’t completely given up on their school responsibilities.

Jeongin hadn’t heard much from Felix, either. As always, the boy was busy running his errands around the school and then rushing to work after classes. They exchanged smiles whenever they passed each other in the corridor and sent each other memes from time to time, but mostly that was it. Jeongin was itching to go up and offer Felix a hand—as it was impossible for him not to notice the dark circles under his eyes and the nervousness written all over his body—but every time he was about to do it, his courage dissipated at the very last moment.

His mind had been a mess lately. With his Spider-Man duties on hold, things had gotten back to normal. His friends kept sending him disappointed glances whenever they caught him staring at Felix from afar. They encouraged him to make a move during lunch breaks as he sat, propping his chin on his hand with a hopeless look on his face. Even though Felix cast him a smile every now and then, it seemed like Jeongin had retreated back into his bubble of insecurity, unable to do anything about it. Their project was almost done, and even if it needed a few improvements, they still had about three weeks until it was due. There was no need for them to talk about it yet. With that, Jeongin was again stuck admiring the boy from afar. He hadn’t seen him outside of school as he used to for the past few weeks—and he wasn’t even sure if he would ever go back to it. The more he thought about it, the more he noticed how many boundaries he had crossed and how reckless he had become. Having tossed and turned in bed, unable to fall asleep for a few nights in a row, he realized that he needed to stop blurring the line between his two lives—before it backfired on him.

As the school year drew closer to the long-anticipated summer vacation, the days slowly became longer and filled with sunlight. That could only mean the students swarming out of the school building to sit outside on lunch breaks whenever the weather allowed. Jeongin and his friends particularly fancied the bleachers at the foot of the slope on the other side of the sports field, as it offered some privacy along with a perfect view of the school grounds. 

While Seungmin and Jisung were busy bantering over some school assignment again, Jeongin found himself unable to tear his gaze away from a blonde boy sitting by a picnic table under a tree with his friends. His head was tilted back as he laughed with them, a huge grin stretched across his face, cheeks flushed pink from the guffaw. His blond hair shimmered in the sunlight, making him look so bright it was almost ethereal. It was nice to see him smiling so vividly after all those times Jeongin had spotted him rushing through the corridors, face pale from all the stress and exhaustion. But as nice as it was, the view had awoken some sense of uncertainty somewhere in his guts as well.

“You’re miserable, really,” Jisung commented, sliding closer to him and following his gaze.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Jeongin muttered.

Jisung rolled his eyes. “How long do you plan on sitting here and staring? Honestly, I thought you two were finally getting acquainted.”

Jeongin sighed and darted his eyes away, now staring down at his palms. He hadn’t even noticed how they were stained with blue ink. He started brushing his fingers across the skin, trying to wipe the splotches away. “We– It was just a project.”

He could feel his best friend’s piercing gazes on himself. “Just a project? Yeah, fine, but you got a chance to talk then, right? You got to know that he struggles with school and all that shit, so why not use it finally?” The boy gestured vividly as he talked. “What, you want to give up on all that all of a sudden? The Summer Dance is just round the corner!”

“If that’s so, then why you still haven’t made a move to invite Minho?” Jeongin snapped, suddenly annoyed. He didn’t mean to, but he was already aware that he was making a mistake by ignoring all that he had managed to build between him and Felix. Jisung pointing it out just pulled a nerve.

“Well, yeah. The fact that I’m miserable doesn’t mean I want my friends to be so, too.” Jisung’s voice was lacking the previous excitement as he slumped back in his seat.

Jeongin’s guts twisted with guilt immediately. He looked up at the boy with an apologetic expression. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I’m just a mess about it all, I don’t know what to do.”

Seungmin closed his coursebook and leaned forward from his spot next to Jisung, eager to join the conversation. “I mean, Ji already told you what to do. Just talk to him. It wouldn’t hurt, would it?”

“He smiles at you in the corridors, Innie, it’s not that hard to notice. So if you really care, don’t let it all sink,” Jisung added, his voice lacking the previous vigor.

Jeongin was silent for a moment, his eyes finding the blond boy again. Now that the previous eruption of laughter was over, he was still smiling widely as he focused on Hyunjin who was explaining something with great passion. His chin was propped on his palm and his eyes glimmered with so much sincere interest, Jeongin could only wish them to be focused on him instead.

“But… what should I even say?” He wondered weakly.

Jisung threw his hands in the air. “I dunno, ask him about the weather or something! Just do it!” He groaned.

Fortunately, Seungmin decided to be a bit more helpful. “Ask him how he’s been doing. How he feels about school and stuff.”

“Math assignments are always a perfect way to start,” added Jisung with a dash of sarcasm.

Jeongin nodded his head, still fiddling with his fingers. “Sure, yeah.” He let out a deep sigh. “I guess I’ll try.”

Jisung leaned back, propped on his hands, and knocked the rubber soles of his sneakers together. A moment later, his stomach grumbled demandingly, causing Jeongin to snort out a laugh.

Jisung turned at him, offended. “What’s so funny? My hunger should not be funny.” He pouted.

“How about grabbing some more Kimchi Jjigae before the class starts? Maybe there’s still some left, if we’re lucky,” Seungmin noticed and now it was Jeongin’s stomach grumbling too, reminded of the heavenly food they had at the beginning of the break.

The mention of food was enough to put Jisung back on his feet. He grabbed a strap of his backpack and tossed it on his shoulder carelessly. “Let’s not waste time, then, shall we?” He clasped his hands twice, looking at them expectantly. “Hurry up, guys, we don’t have all day!”

Having gathered their things from the ground, they followed the boy back to the school building. They crossed the sports field, where a few other students were gathered by the basketball hoop, laughing and shouting as they fought for the ball. As they walked, Jeongin lifted his gaze which almost immediately fell at the tables, at the one occupied by Felix. Their eyes connected just as the boy turned his head, too. He cast him a wide smile which Jeongin shyly returned, before blinking awkwardly and lowering his gaze back to the ground.

Jisung, who apparently had spotted the whole exchange, appeared by his side and nudged him with his elbow.

“Miserable,” he whispered in his ear.

𒌐

Throughout the day, Jeongin had come up with countless scenarios for how to approach Felix again, but in the end, none of them came to fruition.

Having taken a quick glance around the corridor, Jeongin slid out the Chemistry lab and carefully closed the door behind him. Most of the classes had already finished, and now the only students left were those in extracurricular activities, retaking tests, or as in Jeongin’s case, lingering to take care of their own business. Which was why Jeongin had found himself hanging out in the lab for some extra time, just to grab the beaker filled with his self-made Web Fluid, hidden in the drawer of his assigned desk. Sometimes he managed to prepare the mixture during classes, and sometimes he had to do it after to avoid curious glances—anyway, it was always better to take it home without any witnesses. Now, as the liquid was safely hidden in his backpack, he let out a deep breath and walked down the corridor.

With his head filled with rushing thoughts, he was not at all prepared for the school president to suddenly appear from behind a corner, causing them both to flinch and stop in their tracks.

“Woah! Sorry,” Felix exclaimed, his eyes widening as he stumbled back on wobbly legs, with confusion etched across his face.

Jeongin’s arm shot out instinctively to steady him. “Sorry, didn’t see you coming.” He offered him a sheepish smile.

Felix let out a small chuckle. “It’s fine, I didn’t see you either. What kept you here for so long?” he joked, glancing around the empty corridor.

Jeongin hesitated for a second but fortunately, after all those months, his mind got used to coming up with quick excuses whenever they were needed.

“Oh, I had to consult Mr. Cheung about my Physics equations. And then I went for some stuff that I’d left in class,” he said, waving his hand dismissively. Felix nodded, although his gaze again flew at the corridor behind him, his eyebrows curving a little. Jeongin glanced to the side as well, before clearing his throat. “How about you? School-council stuff, I’m guessing?”

Felix shook his head, letting out a resigned sigh. “Not today, no. But I decided to hit the library and study a bit. Time runs fast, you know.”

  “Oh, cool,” Jeongin responded but his mind momentarily went blank as he struggled to find the right words. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. “Um, what are you going to study for?” he added after a moment, scratching his jaw.

Felix groaned. “Math, obviously. We have a test coming up, and it seems like I still can’t solve shit.” He sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair.

“I– I could help you if you want,” Jeongin blurted out before he could rethink it. His breath caught in his chest at the realization, but then it released immediately as he noticed the sparkles reflecting in Felix’s eyes as he looked up at him, surprised.

“Really? I mean, it’s okay if you don’t have time…”

“No, I don’t have anything else to do,” Jeongin cut in nervously. He fidgeted on his feet, glancing away for a moment before meeting Felix’s gaze again. “And it would be nice to revise things. If you don’t mind me joining, of course,” he added quickly, his hands moving awkwardly by his sides.

Felix shook his head with a cute smile. “Not at all! I’m glad you want to join, I don’t think I would last long doing it alone.”

He chuckled and looked at him again, a curious glint in his brown eyes. Jeongin felt his brain glitch. He had already forgotten how much power this gaze held over him. Usually, Jeongin just felt both intimidated and hypnotized at the same time. After a moment of weakness, he had to avert his eyes to avoid melting into a puddle. He adjusted the strap of his backpack on his shoulders and took a small step to the side, trying his best to maintain his cool and appear nonchalant.

“Shall we go, then?” he asked before clearing his throat again.

Felix gave him a small smile and nodded. His fingers kept messing with each other as they crossed the corridor. Jeongin took a few glances at him on their way, but they were never reciprocated, as the other boy’s eyes were too busy scanning the space around them, switching nervously from side to side. At that, Jeongin felt his own stomach stir with unease.

“Quite a tiring day, wasn’t it?” he said, casting him another glance.

“Yeah, a bit,” Felix agreed and bit his lip.

Jeongin pondered for a second, feeling the heat of nervousness spread across his skin as he searched in mind for any means to keep the conversation up. He could almost hear the voices of his best friends, both encouraging and disappointed by his miserable weakness. By the way he lost his senses so easily whenever Felix was close.

“You seem a little bit distracted today,” he gently pointed out.

“It’s just–,” Felix paused and averted his eyes again, hands clutching onto the straps of his backpack. Then he sighed and lowered his head down with resignation. “I just have some stuff on my head. But it’s nothing important.”

 “I see,” Jeongin hummed and licked over his lips, feeling them going dry. His chest hurt at the sight of Felix acting so nervous and fidgety, when just a few hours ago he had seen him laugh along with his friends. He wanted to be able to comfort him, to find out what was causing him so much trouble, what was the reason for his smile to disappear and for his eyes to look so red and fatigued. But sometimes it was just hard to tell where some boundaries finished and where the others started.

They left the school building in silence. Jeongin had to squint his eyes at the brightness of the sun, but he also felt relieved when the warm sun rays touched his skin. The weather was perfect and for a moment his body almost ached to let it all go, put his suit on, and jump from the tallest building in the city with a scream at top of his lungs that would die unheard by anyone, carried away by the wind and the speed of his fall. It had been a while since he had done that.

 “I can’t believe I’m going to waste such a beautiful day to study,” Felix groaned, his lips forming into a pout.

Jeongin chuckled, his attention going back to the boy again. “Maybe we should go for a walk before studying,” he suggested with a shrug.

But Felix shook his head with a sad expression. “I would love to but I have too much work to do. I’ve already fallen so far behind.”

  “Yeah, you’re right, it’s better to get done with it,” Jeongin admitted lightly.

Felix brought his lower lip between his teeth, glancing away briefly before meeting Jeongin’s eyes again. “Are you sure you want to join? I don’t want you to waste your time on this.” He let out a nervous chuckle.

Jeongin shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips. “It’s not a waste if I’m helping you.” He grinned, trying to ignore the burning sensation spreading over his body, his heart pounding hard in his chest. As always, when Felix was around.

Soon, they were already climbing the steps leading to the library. Jeongin skipped the last two steps with a graceful hop and reached out to hold the door for the blonde, turning to him with a cocky grin. “After you, Mr. President” he said.

Felix seemed to be a little taken aback by that, his cheeks slightly tinted with pink, but finally he laughed and passed the threshold with a huge smile. “You’re a gentleman, I see.”

Jeongin felt his stomach flutter but managed to stay on his feet. “I have my moments.”

Built as an extension after a few years of the school’s existence, the library was located in a separate building nearby. It was a bit more modern than the school itself, with walls still freshly painted and untouched by the course of time. For students who wanted to use the space for studying, there were a variety of cozy spots to choose from, like common areas with wide desks and comfortable seats, or separate cabins for those who needed some peace and quiet for better focus.

The two boys climbed up the winding stairs inside and settled at one of the wooden desks on the first floor, some of which were already occupied by other students. It was a perfect place for those who needed to engage in discussions while studying, as it was not one of those “remain silent” areas—the reading room was located somewhere else.

“I was planning to first go through all the exercises we already did in class,” Felix explained, taking his books out of his backpack. “If I get them right, then I’ll try to do the revision ones she told us to do. I want to make sure I understand the topic well enough.”

Jeongin nodded, spinning a pen between his fingers as he watched the other boy arrange his things on the desk. “Fine, we can go through them together,” he suggested.

Felix hesitated, doubt filling his eyes as he glanced up at him. “Are you sure? I thought you would rather go for the revision tasks. ”

A blush crept its way to Jeongin’s cheeks. “I did them already.”

Being stuck at home due to his wound, at some point he had nothing better to do than to properly catch up on all the schoolwork. And somehow he had found himself enjoying the revision tasks more than he should have, as they managed to consume his thoughts for a solid two hours.

Felix blinked a few times, before smiling widely. “Oh, of course.” He shook his head with amusement. “I should have known. I hope you don’t mind sharing a bit of your genius with me, though.” He sent him a wink, causing Jeongin’s blood to flow all the way up to his cheeks.

Felix didn’t seem to mind Jeongin’s flustered state. As he casually pulled his hair back, Jeongin noticed the small, smug smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He paused for a second, watching as Felix tied his blond hair into a loose ponytail. A few strands fell across his forehead, and before Jeongin could stop himself, his eyes followed them—until Felix looked his way, catching him in the act. Jeongin quickly turned away, face burning.

It was impossible not to notice the subtle change in Felix's demeanor as he straightened up in his seat and opened a notebook. While Jeongin struggled to find somewhere to settle his gaze to calm the nervousness rising in his chest, Felix seemed to be enjoying himself more than before. The smile was still there when he reached for his notebook, and Jeongin needed to be careful to not burst into flames.

Felix glanced at him once more before finally opening the manual and sliding it to the center of the desk so they could both see it well. Jeongin leaned forward to have a better look, and Felix did the same, bringing them so close across the table that their shoulders almost were almost brushing. Jeongin froze at the proximity—and then at the realization that he hadn’t even bothered to take out his own manual, still stuffed in his bag right behind him. But now, he wouldn’t dare to move away to get it.

“This whole topic is a mess, but I struggle with word problems the most,” Felix explained, flipping through the pages to find the right chapter.

Jeongin tilted his head, his gaze following the movements of Felix’s small fingers, as always adorned with silver rings. “I think we should go through them all from the start. Let’s begin with the closed tasks.”

 Felix nodded, looking quite determined. “Fine, let’s do it.”

It went well for the first three equations. Jeongin did them too, nonchalantly scribbling his calculations without giving them too much thought. He didn’t really need to go through all of them once more, but he deduced it was better than trying to do anything else, as his mind probably wouldn’t be able to focus if he wanted to read the material for other classes. He was already somewhere by the tenth exercise when he noticed Felix’s pen hovering over his notebook in hesitation. His forehead was propped on his palm, and his mouth was moving gently as he appeared to be trying to understand the task in silence.

Jeongin quickly reread the fourth task, before turning back to Felix. “Need some help?” he asked gently.

Felix sighed and retreated in his seat, his back bumping hard against the back of his chair. “I don’t get what I’m supposed to do here. I mean, it made sense in the previous exercises but here?” He waved his hands in resignation.

“It’s not that bad, don’t worry. Look, let’s reread it one more time. Can you do it out loud?” he suggested in a gentle voice.

Felix hummed, leaning forward again. He hesitated for a moment before finally reading the exercise aloud, with a trace of uncertainty in his voice.

“Good. Now we need to gather all the information we get from the exercise. It helps to write it down first,” Jeongin said, tapping Felix’s notebook with his own pen.

“Okay…” Felix’s hand hovered above the paper. He shuffled in his chair, eyes skimming over the exercise again, before he slowly wrote some numbers down. Then he turned the notebook for Jeongin to see, looking at him with uncertain eyes. “Is it okay?”

Propped on his forearms, Jeongin gently leaned forward to read the information. Then he nodded and gave the boy an encouraging smile. “Yeah, I think that’s all we need. You know what to do next?”

Felix glanced up at him again and bit his lip, looking like a lost kitten. Jeongin let out a small giggle and shook his head.

 “Fine, let me show you once more.”

And then slowly, he explained every single step to Felix, one by one. It took some time, but after a short explanation and a moment of reflection, Felix was able to follow his instructions and get the solution right. While explaining and waiting for the boy to understand, Jeongin felt a wave of pleasant warmth wash through his body. It felt comforting to just sit there together, in a corner of the library, surrounded by books and quiet murmurs of other students. It was as if the rest of the world didn’t really matter, only the two of them and the Math equations.

As time passed by, everything was becoming easier and easier. They went through all of the exercises from the manual, with Jeongin explaining every single one of them thoroughly, until Felix was able to understand. They took a few breaks, conversation floating effortlessly as they exchanged jokes and funny remarks concerning school life. It appeared that both of them were keen on a little bit of gossip, and it was only natural for them to waste some time on chattering about their classmates, their best friends included.

By the time they finished all the exercises from the manual, the sun was already heading down to hide behind the horizon.

Felix closed the book and stretched his arms with a wide yawn. “God, I can’t believe we’re done,” he groaned and wiped his face with his hands.

Jeongin smiled with amusement. “We still need to go through the revision sheets.”

Felix rolled his eyes, but the corners of his mouth lifted up, nonetheless. “Fine, but for today we’re done. If I have to do even one more exercise, my brain will explode.”

“Yeah, I think that’s enough. We did a good job,” Jeongin noticed, throwing his backpack on his shoulder and waiting for Felix to pack all his stuff.

The boy looked up at him, and this time his smile was softer, more sincere. “It probably wouldn’t have gone as well without you,” he said quietly, giving Jeongin’s arm a quick, appreciative tap. “I really mean it—thank you.”

Jeongin felt his face warm. Felix’s touch had caught him off guard. “It’s nothing, really. I’m just glad I could help,” he said, laughing a little.

“You explain things in a way that actually makes sense,” Felix added with a smile, glancing over at him as they walked. Jeongin could feel the weight of that look, and even though he tried to stay cool, his heart definitely wasn’t cooperating. “Maybe Math isn’t a whole new language, after all,” he added lightly.

When they left the library building, the evening was almost there, with the sky turning dark and the air freshened by the cool breeze. It was still very pleasant and Jeongin wondered if it was possible for this moment with Felix to last a bit longer. He felt a sudden determination growing in his chest—it seemed like the moment had finally come. It was now or never.

“What time is your bus home?” he asked casually when they stopped by the school gate, both of them uncertain if they should part their ways already. 

Felix slid his phone out of the pocket of his jeans, raising his eyebrows. “In fifteen minutes, actually. Or another one, in an hour.”

Jeongin nodded, shifting from one foot to the other. “You know, I think an hour is enough to still make some use of this weather,” he offered lightly. His hands awkwardly wandered in and out of his pockets, trying to find a place to belong.

Felix’s eyes lingered upon him for a moment. Then he bit his lip, as if stopping for a thought, before his face lit up. “We could hang out in the park for a while,” he suggested. “And maybe grab some ice-cream on the way.”

Jeongin grinned, content with the idea. “Ice-cream sounds great.”

A few minutes later, they were sitting on a brick wall by the small pond in the center of the park, enjoying ice-cream they had grabbed from a 7-Eleven just round the corner. As the night was getting closer, the street lamps lit up, casting an orange glow around them. The sky had turned into a dark shade of blue, with just a few orange hues around the clouds, as if marking the path of the sun.

Jeongin looked around the place, taking in the sights of the pathways surrounded by beautiful greenery. They stretched around the pond and then followed further into the park, providing access to wooden benches spaced every few meters, a playground for children, and a small flower garden on the other side. Jeongin wondered how come he had never paid much attention to this place before, even though it was located so close to his high school.

As they ate in comfortable silence, he turned to take a look at the boy sitting next to him, so close that their shoulders were almost brushing. The light from the street lamps reflected on Felix’s face beautifully, making his blond hair shine with a golden hue, and the skin on his cheeks look like honey. Jeongin couldn’t take his eyes off.

“It's pretty nice here. You come here often?” he asked.

“Very pleasant, isn’t it? It’s one of my favorite places in the whole area. It soothes my mind every time I come here,” Felix admitted.

As they were sitting like that by the pond, surrounded by the sounds of nature and passed by only a few passerby walking the pavement behind them, Jeongin found himself at an unusual ease. He noticed that he very often felt like that when there was nobody else but Felix by his side. Warm and peaceful. His presence was like a soft blanket and a cup of hot cocoa on a winter evening.

“I’m glad I could come here with you,” Jeongin remarked, glancing up at him from where he was sitting. His skin tingled at their proximity, and he felt every muscle in his body relax. He felt like he could sit in that place forever, taking in every single word, every single thought that Felix would be willing to share with him. But no matter how relaxed he was feeling, when he glanced to the side, he couldn’t let go of an impression that there was always something occupying the blond’s mind. “Are you okay, though?” he asked after a moment of hesitation.

The leaves on the trees around them ruffled at the gentle breeze of wind. Felix shuttered and put the empty ice-cream cup on the ground next to him, before bringing his legs up, close to his chest. He pondered for a moment but Jeongin waited.

“It’s just… I feel like a mess sometimes. Like I don’t belong anywhere, even if I try. Even if it may… seem like I do.” He shuddered again and wrapped his arms around his knees. His teeth chattered lightly before he continued. “I don’t really talk about it, even to my friends, you know? Because it seems like everyone has at least a small sense of purpose and I’m just wandering around but there are dead ends everywhere.”

Jeongin slowly nodded, taking in his words. “That’s… a lot. But remember, we’re still young, right? You don’t have to have everything figured out already.”

As he spoke, he tried to choose his words with extreme care. It was yet another time when Felix decided to share his worries with him, and for Jeongin it meant everything.

“It’s lame, isn’t it? As if I was just jealous of everyone or something.” Felix’s voice was bitter, filled with anguish.

Jeongin sighed and shook his head. “It’s not lame to feel stuff. I mean, it’s not like you can stop yourself from feeling a certain way, it’s just how emotions work. It’s all biology. So there’s no point in blaming yourself for it.”

A single tear rolled down Felix’s cheek but he wiped it quickly with his hand. “Sometimes I wonder if maybe I just worked harder–” He took in a shaky breath but didn’t continue. Jeongin noticed that his lower lip started to tremble, and he felt his heart clench.

He gently reached out and grabbed Felix’s small hands into his own. They were much smaller than his own, and much colder. He brushed his thumbs against the knuckles, trying to warm them up in a soothing motion.

“It might sound weird, but I’ve never once thought you don’t work hard,” Jeongin said, giving his hands a gentle squeeze. “Honestly, it’s kind of the opposite. You always seem to throw yourself into everything. I don’t know the full story, but… I think it matters. And I think it’s enough.”

Felix turned his head at him, blinking in confusion, his eyes glistening with tears. “You do?”

Jeongin lifted one hand up and brushed his hair back, letting out a nervous laugh. “You seem like one of the most hard-working people at our school. You always give your all in whatever you do. I just think that as long as you try your best, that's all that matters.”

Then he felt a gentle pressure on his palm as Felix squeezed it a little tighter, shifting slightly until their fingers were intertwined. Jeongin stared down at their joined hands, his heart thudding in his chest. Then he looked up at Felix, but the boy’s attention was already on him.

“You are always so kind to me. All the time,” Felix murmured.

“I just– I like you,” Jeongin blurted out before he could even think but it was like his brain stopped processing any sensations anymore. 

Instead, his attention was caught by a few loose strands of blond hair falling onto the boy’s forehead—then he barely registered his own hand reaching up to brush them away, moving on its own, as if locked in a trance.

And then, his whole world turned upside down, as Felix leaned in and pressed their lips together. It was soft and sudden—so sudden that Jeongin barely had time to react. The warmth of Felix’s body was so close, so real, that he felt like he was going to melt. His senses were overwhelmed: the gentle pressure of lips against his, the sweet scent of Felix’s perfume making his mind go crazy. Blood rushed to his head, cutting off all sounds, even his own thoughts, until there was nothing else but Felix, Felix, Felix.

Chapter Text

When Felix opened his eyes the next morning, he felt like he could fly.

He moved around his flat like in a trance, starstruck. All those things that usually would have brought his mood down, they all didn’t matter anymore. It didn’t matter that his mother couldn’t look at him without a grimace—in fact, this time he barely even managed to register her presence, as his mind kept drifting somewhere far away, stuck on cloud nine. His whole morning routine passed without his notice, and before he could blink, he was already on the bus headed to school.

“Hi, what got you so happy today?” Minho asked, eyeing him curiously as he plopped down on the empty seat next to him.

Felix glanced up from his phone, where his thumb was ghosting over the keyboard in his chat with Jeongin. Yesterday after going back home, they exchanged ‘good night’ messages, and for some reason, now he couldn’t stop staring at them.

“Nothing special, why?” He switched the screen off and turned his attention to Minho.

The other boy shrugged. “I don’t know, you just seem happier than usual. But it’s good to see,” he stated simply.

Felix gave him a soft smile. Then he frowned a little as his mind suddenly struck him with questions. His own struggles aside, he never stopped worrying about his friend's well-being, especially after the recent events. “Hey, by the way, Minho. How have you been? You know, with all that what happened.” He observed him with concern.

Minho was quiet for a moment, his expression unreadable as always. It was typical for him, never to show too much no matter what happened. But maybe it was a good thing. Personally, Felix admired his ability to remain composed in every situation, very often struggling to keep his own emotions at bay. Still, even though Minho didn’t show it, he knew that witnessing a robbery at his grandmother's store must have been traumatizing.

“Halmeoni is feeling good, still a bit shaken, but I don’t think it made too big of an impression on her,” Minho said, eyes stuck on the road in front of them, blinking. 

Felix, on the other hand, kept his gaze on him, evaluating. “And how about you?”

Minho shook his head. “I’m all right, Spider-Man already took care of everything when I arrived.”

The blond shifted in his seat at the mention of the superhero. He already knew that he had been present when the robbery happened, and moreover, had been shot. In fact, he couldn’t stop thinking about it, because… He had a feeling about this whole situation, but he really, truly wasn’t able to believe his assumptions were true. Or maybe he didn’t want to.

“I’m glad he was there. It’s amazing, really,” he said instead, keeping his voice casual.

Minho nodded his head in agreement before quickly sliding his palm over his face, a sigh escaping him. “I don’t even want to imagine what could have happened if he wasn’t there. I mean, those men came there with guns and everything, and if not for him…” Minho paused for a moment and looked around the bus to make sure nobody could hear them, before turning to Felix with a serious expression, his voice lowered. “Even he, even Spider-Man got shot.”

Felix stared at him, eyes wide open. It was not common to see Minho get so worried about anything.

Suddenly, it became hard for him to swallow. “But– but he’s okay, right?”

Minho shook his head, visibly clueless. “I can’t tell, I saw him for barely a few minutes. But from what I saw, I think the bullet didn’t really hit him, it was more like it cut through his side when he was trying to dodge it. At least that’s how it looked. And he seemed to be able to move, so… I think he’s okay. I hope so.”

Felix hummed, lowering his gaze in contemplation. It seemed like nobody had heard about Spider-Man’s whereabouts since that Friday night. The boy couldn’t deny that the situation had gotten to his head a little bit, especially when he hadn’t seen the superhero on his way back from work on Sunday. There was nothing on the news, nothing on the internet. The only relevant thing he had seen was a post on some Spider-Man fan account on Twitter, but even that didn't say much—just a notice that the superhero hadn’t been seen in town for the past few days.

Normally, this whole situation wouldn’t be of such an importance to Felix—after all, accidents happened, and even a superhero probably needed a few days off. But it was not what caught his attention. The reason why he couldn’t stop thinking about it was the series of weird coincidences the boy kept witnessing, and somehow each one of them seemed to be pointing in the exact same direction. The only problem was that, before Felix could figure out the target, every clue he had encountered always led him to a dead end.

As the bus pulled over their stop, Felix shook off the endless speculations. He needed to focus on the matters at hand, like school, not contemplate about what was true and what was not. It didn’t seem like he was going to get the answers any soon either way, and he definitely didn’t have time to dig into matters that shouldn’t be of his concern.

With a shared groan of protest, the two boys reluctantly got up from their seats and jumped out of the vehicle. Felix squinted his eyes at the blinding light of the sun, an indicator that summer was just round the corner. As soon as he felt the warm rays on his skin, he wished he didn’t have to waste such a beautiful day at school.

“Changbin says that they’re on the pitch,” Minho announced, glancing at his phone as they walked towards the school building.

“Let’s go then, there’s still some time left. I don’t want to go inside so soon anyway. I need some sun.” Felix let out a soft sigh and tilted his head back, enjoying the pleasant warmth from the sky.

Sounds of laughter and a ball being kicked reached their ears even before they arrived at the sports field. Felix didn’t need to see them to know that it was his friends occupying the field, as always when weather allowed. Sometimes they would be accompanied by some other players from the football team and their friends, mostly during lunch break. This morning, it was only them.

Hyunjin jogged up to them as soon as they came into view, leaving poor Changbin behind with a ball under his foot.

“Hi guys! Finally,” he greeted them with a huge smile, wrapping his arms around both of their shoulders. Some black strands had escaped his short ponytail, now falling onto his forehead.

Minho responded with a huge grimace. “You stink, Hwang.”

“Whatever.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes and pulled away from him immediately, now leaving his body weight propped solely on Felix. The boy couldn’t hold back a smile at the exchange.

While Minho walked over to Changbin, Hyunjin slowed down their steps a little, keeping the distance. Eventually, he made them both come to a halt, his expression suddenly turning solemn.

“Hey, Felix, um,” he began, sliding his palm across his chin nervously. “Can we talk for a moment?”

Felix furrowed his eyebrows, a little bit confused. “Sure, did something happen?”

Hyunjin shook his head, letting out a short, anxious laugh. “No, no, it’s not the case. I just… I just wanted to say sorry.” He cleared his throat, dropping his gaze to the ground. “About what I said earlier.”

Felix just watched him quietly, waiting for the boy to continue. But he couldn’t deny that seeing him like that—open and sincere—for Felix, it was already enough. He already started missing his best friend, and now that he was finally coming back to him, he couldn’t be more grateful.

“Listen, I know how much this summer dance matters to you, and trust me, I wouldn’t quit it even if they paid me.” He lifted his gaze, now cupping Felix’s face and looking him in the eye. “I don’t know why I said what I said, but I really, really, regret it. And I know I hurt you, so I’m sorry.”

Felix observed him for a moment, then let out a tired sigh. “Thanks for saying that. And… I’m sorry for snapping, too. That wasn’t fair.” He finally looked up, a small, uncertain smile tugging at his lips. “So… I guess we’re even?”

And Hyunjin smiled back, before eventually pulling him closer and into a tight hug. “God, I’m sorry, I really hate it when we argue,” he mumbled and squeezed him one more time before finally pulling away and ruffling his hair. 

Felix screeched and pulled away, shielding himself with his hands as he tried to save his hairstyle. “Hey, not the hair!”

“Sorry, it looks better this way.” Hyunjin giggled, and once the blond put his hands down, he reached out to ruffle his head one more time.

“Hwang, I swear to god–”

Although the beautiful weather called for them to stay outside longer, about fifteen minutes later they had to leave the field. The four of them reluctantly aimed for the school building, and as they walked, Hyunjin stuck to Felix like glue, again wrapping his arm around him. The blond didn’t mind, he knew that Hyunjin was not going to leave him now—it was his way of showing that he cared. And that he truly was sorry.

Felix couldn’t have been more grateful for his apology. Among all the recent events, it had deeply hurt him to hear Hyunjin think so little of the Summer Dance, something he had been organizing for such a long time and pouring so much of his energy into. Even though he realized that some of Hyunjin's insights were true, all he asked for was just a little bit of support and understanding—no matter how bad it was going to be, all he wished for was to go through it with his friends by his side.

“What class do you have now, Biology?” he asked as they were climbed the steps to the entrance.

“Yeah, that stuff.” Hyunjin let out a sigh. “Pretty sure Mr. Yoon has another partner worksheet waiting for us.”

“At least you can do it in pairs, not alone.” Felix chuckled and playfully nudged him with his elbow. “Besides, aren’t you supposed to like Biology?”

“I like football, Lix. Not diagrams of the circulatory system.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes, finally letting go of Felix to open the door. “I need good grades in this only because SNU requires it for the scholarship, nothing more.”

Felix gave a little frown as he passed the threshold. “It’s weird that they require Biology specifically.”

“They need to make sure that their players are not complete idiots,” Minho chimed in, grinning mischievously at the tallest boy.

Hyunjin turned at him immediately, offended. “Excuse me?” Now he started walking backwards, tilting his head and bestowing Minho with a cocky smirk. “Should I recite the endocrine system to you? Or would you rather have a private lesson on some specific hormones?”

Minho imitated his smirk, moving his face dangerously close to Hyunjin’s. “And why don’t you use that Broca’s area of yours and actually shut up, hm?”

Hyunjin’s grin only widened. “You know what, Lee? I kinda like it when you nerd out. What a pity I’m not your type.”

Minho just rolled his eyes. “Get lost, Hwang.”

Hyunjin blew him a kiss before walking back up to Felix. The blond watched him with an amused smile. 

“You two are insufferable,” he commented.

“Ow, c’mon, it’s always fun to hear Minho talking back.” Hyunjin shrugged.

“Alright, Hwang, we need to get going or we’re gonna be late. Again,” Changbin announced, patting him firmly on the shoulder.

“Relax, Bin, we’re almost there,” Hyunjin said, then once again ruffled Felix’s hair in goodbye. “I’m sorry to leave you, angel, but don’t worry,” he leaned forward to murmur into his ear, his finger gently moving Felix’s chin to look toward the lockers. “Seems like your cute little friend is already watching.”

“What?” Felix blinked, confused, but then his gaze followed the pointed direction and locked onto nobody else but Jeongin. Before he could respond, Hyunjin and Changbin were already away, leaving him with cheeks burning hot.

Memories flashed in his brain like fireworks, and he didn’t even notice when Jeongin walked over from the lockers, now standing so close that it burned. 

 “Hi.”

Felix’s knees nearly gave out at the crescent smile Jeongin cast his way. He stared at him as if he was a ghost. “Oh, h-hi, Jeongin! What are you– What’s up?”

This was fucking embarassing.

Jeongin moved his hand up and scratched the back of his neck, smiling nervously with dimples forming in his cheeks. “I’m good, I just wanted to say hi before class.”

“Hi,” Felix breathed out again, suddenly losing all of his brain cells. For some reason, he couldn’t take his eyes off, staring into the poor boy’s soul. 

Jeongin blinked, a little taken aback by his behavior, before speaking up again. “Um, I wanted to ask… Do you want to sit together at lunch today?”

After a brief moment that his brain needed to receive the question, Felix quickly shook his head, maybe a bit too enthusiastic. “Yeah, sure! Let’s sit together!”

Clutching the straps of his backpack, Jeongin let out a nervous laugh, clearly stunned by Felix’s sudden eagerness. “Awesome. See you at lunch, then.” He cast him one last grin, then awkwardly turned to Minho, nodding his head in silent greeting. After a second of hesitation, he spun on his heel and walked back to his friends.

“I think I’ll just remain silent,” Minho commented after a beat—though Felix could hear the grin in his voice.

Felix let out a deep breath, eyes still following Jeongin’s retreating figure. “Please, do.”

𒌐

Felix found it impossible to focus in every class he had on that day. He was glad that in most of them he just had to sit and listen to the teacher, because otherwise he would have been doomed. He appreciated that none of them required any thinking from him—because apparently, the only thing he could think of was Jeongin.

But it was actually in Korean Literature class when he truly immersed himself in the realm of daydreaming, losing the last thin threads of staying connected to the present. The kiss from yesterday kept replaying in his mind, sending shivers down his spine. Every thought of Jeongin’s lips raised goosebumps on his arms. His eyes barely registered his surroundings as he stared blankly at the wall, completely absorbed in the movie playing in his head, trying to recall every tiny detail. It was so sweet he couldn’t stop thinking of it all over and over again, completely lost in the dream.

Although it wasn’t just a dream. It was reality. A memory.

His eyes drifted shyly to Jeongin’s figure, seated in the row on his right, two desks in front. Just now he realized that he never really had a chance to appreciate him as much as he could. Did his face always look so pure? And had he always worn that silver earring? Was it common for his hair to just fall onto his forehead like that, curling up a little? Suddenly, Felix wanted to discover every single particularity.

This time when Jeongin looked his way, he didn’t even flinch, too lost in the daze. When their eyes locked, he just sent him a smile. Butterflies danced in his stomach when he saw a blush creep onto Jeongin’s cheeks. Cute.

As he kept stealing glances, trying to offer at least a tiny remnant of his attention to the teacher, he also couldn’t help but notice that Jeongin was actually fine. The black T-shirt he wore today did a poor job of hiding his toned arms and shoulders, and Felix was surprised it had taken him this long to realize how well-built Jeongin’s posture was. It felt a little strange—he remembered Jeongin being totally clumsy during PE classes over the past two years—but maybe he just hated doing sports at school. Whatever the reason, Felix had absolutely nothing to complain about.

Maybe it was just the oversized clothes Jeongin always wore. Or maybe, during the break between second and third class, he’d suddenly bulked up—Felix couldn’t tell. The more he thought about it, the stranger it seemed. And though he didn’t want to jump to conclusions, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d just uncovered another clue.

Because, yeah—Felix was starting to get a seriously strong feeling about who Spider-Man really was.

And for now, Jeongin was his only suspect.

Maybe he was just going nuts again, but the thought had been messing with his head since he saw the blood on Jeongin’s shirt on Saturday. Falling off a skateboard, his ass. Maybe Felix wasn’t the biggest genius of them all, but his brain was working well enough to recognize how bullshit of an excuse it was. Fine, maybe he would have fallen for that in other circumstances—but not when all the signs around were pointing in the exact same direction.

Jeongin being always late for school and disappearing at random moments. Him being completely disinterested in sports, and yet having the body of a K-pop idol. And then the most important of them all — him becoming completely weak and pale when Felix nudged his side by accident, then fleeing to the bathroom with no explanation. The little blood stains on his shirt when he came back, as if there was a fresh wound that Felix must have irritated. A wound that was so strangely there right after the robbery at Minho’s grandmother’s grocery store, fitting so well the description of the gunshot.

Felix didn’t even want to think about it from the other side—how comfortable it felt to be around Spider-Man too. Because if Jeongin and Spider-Man were actually the same person, then it only made sense for him to lose his mind around them both.

Felix felt a cold shiver going down his spine.

Bloody hell.

What was he supposed to do?

Jeongin came up to him again in Chemistry class, when he was standing by the shelf to collect the necessary ingredients for the experiment they were supposed to execute in pairs. As he was trying to reach the hydrogen peroxide bottle—unfortunately placed on the highest shelf—a figure suddenly appeared behind him, grabbing it with no effort at all. Felix didn’t even need to look to know who the person was.

“Thanks,” he said, turning to the boy and taking the bottle with a grateful smile.

“No problem,” Jeongin responded lightly, grabbing a beaker from another shelf. He fidgeted with the glass for a moment before turning to Felix. “By the way, I just wanted to make sure… is it okay for my friends to join us at lunch? I don’t wanna leave them alone.” He watched him with a slight tilt of his head, a small, uncertain smile tugging at his lips.

Felix’s eyes lit up, and he gave a small, reassuring nod. “Yes, of course. We can all eat together. Besides, it’s not like we’re all strangers. It would be nice to catch up.”

“Right, yeah. I just wanted to make sure it’s okay with you.” Jeongin quickly nodded, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. And Felix felt a fluttering in his belly—because why on earth would the boy even bother to ask if he was okay with his friends coming along? It made his heart ache at how much he cared.

They stood for a moment next to that lab cabinet, neither of them really eager to move first. Besides, it seemed like all the other students had already collected their utensils, so the storage room offered the privacy they needed.

To be fair, Felix had been waiting for this moment since the very morning. Spider-Man’s identity aside, his heart still fluttered at every stolen glance and he just couldn’t bear the distance anymore. It all just excited him so much, even if their relationship had been proceeding and turning like a rollercoaster, yet still moving somewhere at the starting point. But maybe that was exactly what made it so thrilling.

Felix glanced around the lab, making sure there was nobody close enough to hear them. He turned back to Jeongin with a soft frown and cleared his throat. He needed to know what they were standing at—immediately. Or he was going to lose his mind.

“Hey, um,” he began, running a hand through his hair nervously. “I just wanted to ask about yesterday. I mean, I was kind of emotional back then, but when we—” He fumbled with his hands, gesturing vaguely, cheeks burning. “I actually really liked it. And I just wanted you to know that I didn’t do it just because I was sad or whatever.” He cleared his throat again, swallowing hard. “I did it because I wanted to. And maybe I still… do.”

When he hesitantly looked up, Jeongin was already watching him with a huge, adorable grin. His hand came up to gently caress Felix’s cheek, catching him off-guard once more. Felix felt a wave of heat rush through him—he was burning.

“I don’t think I can express how much it meant to me,” Jeongin said, still beaming. “But I was just thinking, how about we go out later and talk about it properly? Just the two of us. Whenever you’re free, of course.”

Feeling his soft touch on his face, it was hard for Felix to concentrate. “I would love that, yeah. And I’m free today, too.” He mumbled with a small nod, eyes locked with Jeongin’s gaze.

Just his luck that Wednesday was usually his day off, because there was no way he would be able to focus on his shift after that.

“Awesome. We’ll catch up at lunch, okay?” Jeongin smiled warmly, stepping a little closer. Felix’s breath caught when Jeongin’s hand gently slid down to the back of his neck, tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear on its way down. “Also, this pink really suits you,” he added with a grin, and before Felix knew it, he pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.

Fireworks, explosions, butterflies. Felix could swear that a nerve in his brain short-circuited, fired up, and stopped working.

“Good luck on the experiment,” Jeongin added, his grin lingering as he stepped back, already turning toward his table.

Felix was too stunned to speak. The warmth of the touch lingered longer than expected, making his heart race. After a moment, he quickly turned around, cheeks burning with embarrassment at being caught so off-guard in a damn laboratory storage room, and took a deep breath. What audacity—to toy with his poor heart like that and then just walk away as if nothing had happened. It wasn’t right, not at all. In fact, he needed the boy to come back immediately—to grab him by the neck, pull him close, and kiss him mad until he couldn’t breathe.

Maybe then he would learn.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, he finally stepped back into the classroom, walking straight back to the station he shared with Minho.

His friend looked up, one eyebrow arched. “You good?”

“Yeah, got that stupid hydrogen.” He sighed and plopped down on the chair next to him. “So, where were we?”

Minho put an empty plastic bottle in the centre of the table. “Foam volcano thing. You need to pour ½ cup of that here.”

“Right,” Felix wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans and reached for a cup, giving it to Minho. “Can you hold it for me?”

“Sure.” The boy took the cup and was silent for a moment, waiting for Felix to carefully measure the substance. He watched him with mild interest, then reached for the dish soap and added a generous squirt into the bottle, before swirling it all together. “So, what’s up with you and that nerd?” he asked then, glancing at him with a lazy smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.

 “What?” Felix responded dumbly, avoiding his gaze as he reached for the yeast packet a little too quickly.

Minho rolled his eyes. “You and Jeongin. The nerd.”

Felix gave him a side eye. “I don’t know what you mean,” he mumbled.

Minho hummed and leaned hack with an all-knowing smirk. “Right, so first you get starstruck when he asks you to eat lunch together, and then you come back all red and flustered after spending five minutes in the same room as him. Wait, and you’re doing that History project together, aren’t you? Now that makes sense.” He shook his head with a giggle and started to add some food coloring to their mixture.

Felix’s cheeks flared hotter, but he tried to keep his expression neutral. “Okay, fine, yes. We did get close after working on that project. He’s just… very kind to me.” He hesitated for a moment, tilting his head to the side innocently. “I guess we became… friends.”

Minho snorted and shook his head in amusement. “Friends, my ass. So you’re leaving us for your new nerdy friend now, is that it?” he went on with a smug grin.

Felix groaned, rolling his eyes. “No, I’m not leaving you!” He bit his lip, now glancing at Minho with hesitation. “But you don’t mind it, do you? Them joining us for lunch.”

The boy just shrugged. “It’s fine with me, yeah. But if you think that Bin and Hwang are going to believe your bullshit about becoming all buddy-buddy after a stupid project, then no, they’re not.”

Felix slid his palm down his face with a tired sigh. Oh, screw that, Minho already could see right through him. There was no point in beating around the bush.

He glanced quickly around the lab, then leaned in slightly, keeping his hands busy with mixing the last ingredients. “Okay, listen,” he said, lowering his voice and locking eyes with Minho. “We kinda met up yesterday after school because I needed help with those math exercises, and then we went to grab some ice cream…” He took a deep breath before the words just flew out of him. “And then, I don’t know, we just kept talking, and he looked so cute, made me really open up, and… well, I just kinda kissed him.”

Minho chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. “Oh, I fucking knew something was up with you two. So what, now you’re kissing in the lab storage room, too?” He gave a shit-eating grin.

Felix pushed him lightly, staring at him in disbelief, ears burning hot. “No, are you crazy!?” He whispered. “We just talked, that’s it.”

For his own good, he decided to skip the part where Jeongin gave him a heart attack with a simple cheek kiss.

“Right, first you needed to establish if you’re already boyfriends.” He put the bottle in the centre of the table and prepared a tablespoon of yeast. “Hold up, it’s time for the foam.”

Felix pulled back a little when his friend finally poured a mixture of yeast and water into the bottle. The water immediately grew up and turned into a pink-and-green foam, bursting out of the bottle in uncontrolled bubbles and frothy waves, spilling over the sides of the bottle and onto the tray below. Felix blinked, momentarily distracted from his racing thoughts.

 “Now that was cool,” Minho commented simply, staring at the effects of their work.

“Cool, yeah. And no, we’re not boyfriends,” Felix continued, crossing his arms.

Minho nodded, barely suppressing a grin. “Right, it was just one kiss. And you know what they say—third time’s the charm.” He shot Felix a quick wink, before reaching for the exercise sheet where they were supposed to make notes on the experiment.

Felix was just about to roll his eyes again when he paused, brow furrowing. “Wait… do cheek kisses count too?”

Minho froze for a beat, then slowly looked up with the most devilish smile forming on his face. “You tell me, Romeo.”

𒌐

By the time the lunch break came, Felix’s stomach was already rumbling for attention. But just then a tiny problem appeared when Jisu, the treasurer of the school council, caught him right after class, demanding a necessary meeting. 

“Hey, Felix, we need to talk about the funds for the Summer Party. Are you free right now?” she asked, breathing hard as she had probably rushed all the way from her classroom to catch him.

Felix opened his eyes wide, totally unexpecting her to appear so suddenly. Yes, they did have a meeting every week, but it was usually on Mondays early in the morning. He gnawed at his lip, unsure what to do—he really didn’t want to spend today’s lunch break at the school council office. 

“Oh, Jisu, I’m so sorry, but I was supposed to meet my friends. Is it really that important?” he asked, looking at her apologetically. He hoped she didn’t mind—as much as he didn’t want to let her down, he didn’t want to leave his friends even more.

Especially not today.

Jisu adjusted the bag on her arm, lightly shaking her head. “I mean, it’s not like we have to talk about it right now, but I’d really appreciate it if we could still do it today. The headmaster asked me to deliver a breakdown of the Summer Party’s costs soon by the end of next week.” She sighed, running a hand through her brown curls. 

“Of course, I get it. How about we talk about it after classes?” he suggested, frowning a little in concern.

Jisu quickly nodded. “Sure, it would be great. I’m sorry for catching you so off-guard but I’m not sure if I would be able to meet you later in the week.”

Felix just waved his head dismissively, giving her a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about it, really. We will get it done today, for sure.”

“God, I hope so. See you after classes, then,” she smiled back and walked away, probably to her friends.

Felix let out a deep sigh. He totally forgot that they had to submit the planned expenses to the headmaster. Recently, he had been having so many distractions that the matter of Summer Party preparations started to completely slip his mind. He needed to get a grip immediately.

“Everything’s all right?” he heard a voice coming from behind him. He turned abruptly, surprising the poor Jeongin, who unfortunately had stood a little bit too close behind his back. “Oh, hello,” he smiled widely, securing the stumbling Felix a little by his shoulder.

“Jeongin, hi!” He breathed out, feeling his heartbeat accelerating immediately. “Sorry, I just had to talk to Jisu about the school council stuff.”

“Hi guys,” he heard Minho walking up to his right, as he had been waiting for him to end his conversation earlier. Just then he noticed two other students standing by Jeongin’s side and observing him curiously—Kim Seungmin and Han Jisung.

“Hi!” Jisung replied immediately, with a cute smile that reminded Felix of a happy quokka. Seungmin just nodded his head in a greeting.

“We’re going outside, right? The weather is too nice to waste it in the canteen today,” Jeongin suggested, clutching his hand on the strap of his backpack.

Felix finally snapped out of his daze and nodded his head. “Yes, let’s go outside.” He gave them a smile and gently put a hand on Jeongin’s shoulder as they started to walk towards the exit. “You guys don’t mind Changbin and Hyunjin joining us, right? We always eat together.”

Jeongin shook his head. “No, of course not.”

Silence suddenly fell between them all, as nobody knew what to say. Minho wasn’t the type to talk much in general, so it was only normal for him to stay even more silent when they were joined by people he didn’t know that well. Jisung didn’t seem to be going to talk much either—Felix noticed a pink blush on his cheeks, as he kept casting shy glances towards Minho.

Interesting.

“Seems like the vending machine is broken again,” Seungmin mumbled, breaking the silence. “What a pity, I really wanted to buy some Cheetos.”

Jeongin, never leaving Felix’s side, picked his head up. “Didn’t they repair it, like, yesterday?”

Seungmin put his mouth into a thin line and nodded. “They did. But it’s broken—again.”

Jisung tilted his head and whined loudly. “Wait, for real? No way, I was supposed to grab a chocolate pudding!”

 “You can buy puddings in the cafeteria, too,” Minho chimed in in a soft voice.

The brunette’s eyes lit up at that, as he turned at him, a little surprised. “Oh, really? I didn’t know that. Thanks.”

And when Felix saw the tips of Minho’s ears getting red, he couldn’t believe his own eyes.

The sun felt pleasant on his skin when they finally stepped outside, trays filled with food from the cafeteria. Somehow they managed to get there before the biggest queue could have formed which allowed them to pick the best food and not waste too much of their break waiting for it. It was a good thing about their school, that it provided one free meal for every student and then some additional choice for a charge. That way, everyone could fill their stomachs without feeling excluded, without the need of bringing food from home.

When everyone got what they wanted, Felix guided them to the picnic table he and his friends usually occupied whenever the weather allowed them to spend lunch break outside.

“We will have to squeeze a little, but I think everyone can fit,” he said and stood on the side, waiting for everyone to settle—everyone besides Jeongin, who on the other hand, was waiting for him.

He glanced up at him with a soft smile. “Hey,” he mumbled out of nowhere, quiet enough just for Jeongin to hear. He just felt a need to acknowledge him alone, apart from everyone else.

And Jeongin just smiled back, eyes sparkling. “Hey.”

Felix kept his gaze for a moment, before finally plopping down next to Minho. Jeongin hesitated for a moment, probably debating on which side of the table to sit. In the end, he chose the spot right next to Felix, casting him another smile. The blond couldn’t help the butterflies flapping their wings in his stomach.

“So,” Seungmin spoke up after a moment, digging his chopsticks into his plate. “Are we going to acknowledge the elephant in the room?”

Jeongin choked on the drink he had barely managed to open. “Sorry?” he coughed out, trying to calm down his throat and his face at the same time.

Felix felt his cheeks heat up. It was one thing to have such a talk with Minho, but a whole new ballgame to get it acknowledged by Jeongin’s friends. To be honest, he probably should have expected that—but maybe he didn’t think Seungmin would bring it up before they’d even started eating.

But the boy didn’t seem to care. Throwing a piece of food into his mouth, he waved his chopsticks between them both. “I meant you two. What’s the deal with you now?”

The change of the topic apparently made Minho’s ears perk up, too. “Right, we can’t ignore that elephant. Are you guys dating or not?”

Felix was going to kill him.

He blinked, unsure what to say. “Uh…”

Jeongin on his side seemed to be choking again.

Seungmin observed them for a moment, then took another bite, shrugging his shoulders. “Well, I will take it as a no. But don’t worry, some relationships need time to develop.” He stated flatly, though a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. Then he shook his head in delight. “Wow, the bulgogi today is really something.”

Even Jisung gave him a surprised look, staring at him as if he'd grown a second head. “And when exactly did you become a relationship expert?”

Seungmin waved his hand dismissively. "Oh, I’m not an expert, I just notice the obvious." A smug smile tugged at his lips. He pondered for another moment before turning his attention to the blond. “By the way, Felix, you should get used to getting ditched a lot.”

Jeongin groaned, dragging a hand over his face. “What are you even saying now?” he asked, looking at his friend with a defeated expression.

Jisung tilted his head. “This one’s true, though. You always ditch us when we actually want to have fun.” He pouted.

This comment actually sparked Felix's interest. Even though they hadn't been very close earlier, he'd also noticed strange aspects of Jeongin's behavior—arriving late in the morning with disheveled hair, running out of class the second the bell rang, and disappearing randomly in the middle of the day even when he'd been laughing with his friends just moments before. He looked up, carefully watching Jeongin’s reaction.

The boy fidgeted in his seat, clearly dumbfounded. “I just… I don’t always have time to hang out.” He gulped.

Seungmin huffed. “You never have time, only the excuses.”

“Exactly,” Jisung chimed in, mouth full. “You vanish the second someone mentions going anywhere fun.”

“I don’t vanish,” Jeongin said quickly, shooting them both a weak glare. “I just get busy sometimes.”

“With what?” Seungmin squinted, not really expecting an answer. “You don’t even have cram school.”

 “Just helping my aunt when she needs it.” Jeongin shrugged and reached for his drink, taking a long sip like that might end the conversation.

Meanwhile, Minho just observed them with interest, as if he were watching an episode of his favorite show unfold.

“Anyway,” Seungmin said, turning his eyes back at Felix, “don’t let him rope you into any weekend plans. He’ll cancel at the last minute.”

“Hey!” Jeongin protested, cheeks tinting pink. “That’s not true. We went together to the arcade like, literally, two days ago.”

“Who’s going to the arcade?” A voice suddenly chimed in, and a second later Hyunjin was standing by the table, looking at everyone with genuine curiosity. Next to him was Changbin, a little bit surprised. “Now, that’s quite an assembly. Where can I sit?”

All of them immediately scooted over in their seats and moved their trays, making space for the newcomers, both of them eventually plopping down on the side already occupied by Jisung and Seungmin. 

“I have to admit, I didn’t expect you to join us today, but I guess, the more the merrier,” Hyunjin spoke up after they all exchanged greetings.

“I think nobody expected that,” Seungmin admitted, giving Jeongin a meaningful look.

Hyunjin observed him for a moment, probably trying to read the room. “Well, since we’re all getting so cozy with each other, I think you guys should come to the game on next Friday, too,” He suggested casually, and Felix for once was grateful for his unmatched ability to not give a shit in the world. “It’s the biggest one this semester so it would be a pity to miss it.”

Changbin nodded enthusiastically, leaning forward on the table to see the two boys on his side better. “You should totally join us guys, it will be so much fun. The crowds always get wild, and I think this one is going to be especially good.”

Jeongin raised a brow, pausing mid-bite. “Why, is it like some eliminations or something?”

 “Yeah. If we win, next semester we get a secured spot in the regionals. So it’s kind of a big deal.” Hyunjin brushed a hand through his dark hair, visibly animated. He always became like this before his matches, especially before the most important—and he very much enjoyed seeing the stands filled to the brim.

Felix felt a sudden grip on his stomach and dropped his eyes down. Shit, he had totally forgotten about this match. Maybe if he hadn’t, he would have made sure in advance to have this one afternoon free, but now he was already assigned to cover a shift at work. There was no way he could call it off right now, the restaurant was already understaffed anyway.

“I don’t think I can make it this time, I’m so sorry. I already have a shift to cover,” he spoke up in a small voice, giving Hyunjin an apologetic look.

The boy hesitated just for a second, but then just sighed and waved his hand dismissively—even though Felix could see the disappointment flicker across his expression. “Don’t worry about it, I know you can’t skip work.” He sighed, then again lifted his head up to glance over the rest of the group, though his voice was less enthusiastic this time. “Still, you guys are invited.”

Seungmin gave a small nod of approval. “We will show up for sure, it’s not like we have any better plans for next Friday, anyway.”

Jisung seemed to be surprised by his friend’s words for a beat, but then his eyes sparkled as he turned his head at Hyunjin and nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, count us in! I can’t wait to see it.”

And while they all engaged in discussing the team’s strategies for winning, it didn’t go unnoticed by Felix how quiet Jeongin had become.

He was glad to see all of their friends get along so well—and it seemed even funnier when he realized that now both him and Jeongin were the ones who spoke the least. But for some reason it felt comforting, not to be the only one that didn't always align with their friends’ plans. And maybe, Felix thought, maybe that was the reason they gravitated towards each other.

Felix shifted slightly on the bench, inching closer to Jeongin, maybe seeking the undeniable comfort he always found in his presence. Their shoulders brushed, and for a moment, Jeongin didn’t react. But when he finally lowered his hand under the table in a quiet invitation, Felix didn’t hesitate a beat to grab it.

He floated through the rest of the classes as if in a dream. Trying to pay attention, but most of the time just getting distracted, thoughts always drifting back to Jeongin. They talked in between classes, the five of them easily clicking with each other and easing up with every new conversation. Felix even wondered how it had happened that they hadn’t got closer in the past—but maybe some things just needed a right moment to find their destined spots.

But mostly he just stared, staying in the realm of daydreaming and exchanging shy smiles from time to time. Nonetheless, even that was enough to provide comfort and send pleasant shivers down his spine. Felix hadn’t felt like that in a long time—to be honest, he wasn’t sure if he had ever felt like that ever before.

They found each other again after classes, asking their friends for understanding as they explained that they already had some plans together. Felix was really excited—even though they had been gravitating towards each other for the whole day, school didn’t make it easy to enjoy their time together. Especially not with their friends around, not when they both could barely even name the feelings that were blooming between them.

 “Do you want to grab the same ice-cream as yesterday or something different?” Jeongin asked, offering him an adoring smile, as he smoothly wrapped their fingers together.

“I think it’s the best spot, especially with today’s weather,” he replied, waving their intertwined hands back and forth.

And a second later the phone vibrated in his pocket, causing him to freeze and turn pale before he even managed to check the message.

“Shit, I totally forgot!” He exclaimed, clumsily taking his phone out and staring at the screen in dread. He quickly turned his head at confused Jeongin, already feeling his heart clench. “I’m so sorry, Innie, I promised Jisu to help her take care of the expenses for the headmaster! She caught me before lunch break but it totally slipped my mind. I'm so sorry, I should have told you.”

He stared at him with wide eyes, internally begging him to understand. God, he was feeling like the worst person in the world.

Jeongin frowned a little, his eyes full of concern. He slowly nodded, “It’s fine, I mean, how long is it going to take? I can, um, just wait outside until you get it done or something.” He scratched the back of his neck, perplexed.

Felix pouted, his heartbeat quickening. “Really, can you do that? I mean, it’s okay if you don't wanna waste your time.” He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “God, I’m so sorry for putting you in this situation.”

Jeongin gave him a soft smile. “Don’t worry, I will just take care of some homework or something. Just go and get it done, and then we can grab ice-cream. I’m really looking forward to it.” He let out a nervous chuckle.

Felix stared at him for a moment, butterflies filling his chest. “You’re truly the best,” he mumbled, starstruck, and then he just leaned in, planting a quick peck on the boy’s cheek, before turning on his heels and jogging away. “I’ll be back asap, I promise!”

And he actually did come back soon, speeding all the way through the corridors and then begging Jisu to take care of it real quick. Fortunately, they just needed to confirm and agree on some details, which really didn’t take long, and managed to finish the whole thing in less than half an hour. Exchanging excited remarks and goodbyes as Jisu wished him good luck on his date, he stormed out of the school council office as soon as they were done, almost tripping on his own feet on his way down out of excitement.

He couldn’t hold back the huge smile on his face as he imagined the rest of the afternoon. Their first kiss had been quick and a bit clumsy, followed by even more clumsy interactions as both of them had gotten too abashed to hold a reasonable conversation without blushing and stuttering. So in the end, they hadn’t talked much after that, just sat there for a moment longer before finally going back home, holding hands as Jeongin walked him to his bus stop, then exchanging a shy hug for a goodbye, and in the end giggling over some embarrassingly cute texts they sent each other before going to sleep.

This time Felix was determined to take their relationship to a new level. It was clear they both had developed a crush on each other and it felt only right to see where it could bring them—honestly, Felix wasn’t able to even imagine them as just friends. He really wanted more, and besides, Jeongin had literally told him yesterday that he liked him too. So now there was no other way—and Felix needed them both to mark a beginning.

He turned the last corner, finally reaching the corridor where he supposed Jeongin to be. He took a long breath and brushed his hair, heart beating fast in excitement.

But when he finally reached their spot, Jeongin was nowhere to be seen.

Chapter Text

“And when at last you find someone to whom you feel you can pour out your soul, you stop in shock at the words you utter— they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside you so long.”

— Sylvia Plath, The unabridged journals of Sylvia Plath

It seemed like the universe was really determined to kick Jeongin’s ass.

He was supposed to spend the best afternoon of his life on a date—dear god, a date!—with Felix, not on another mission. For the whole week, he had been living quite a normal life—going to school by bus, spending quality time with his aunt and friends, developing new relationships… So yes, even though it had crossed his mind a few times whether something big was going to happen, he hadn’t really expected having to leave Felix right before their date and instead swing through the city with sweat dripping down his back, as he had no idea if he could make it before the building would collapse.

Jeongin felt it barely a few minutes after Felix left him alone in the corridor. The usual tingling on his skin, a gnawing feeling in his head, pushing him to move and look outside the window. Then the sound of sirens on the streets—some police cars, two ambulances, and about five fire trucks speeding through the streets from different directions, as he managed to catch out with his acute hearing. Jeongin didn’t even hesitate when he stormed to the bathroom, pulled out the suit he luckily kept stuffed at the bottom of his backpack, and jumped out of the school window.

As he swung, he pulled out his phone from the safety pocket in his suit and opened his chat with Felix. He knew he’d already fucked up leaving him like that, but really he just had to hope the boy would understand. But even though he knew he was going to come across as a jerk, it wasn’t like he had much of a choice. For Jeongin, being Spider-Man wasn’t just a game. It was a duty that he took very seriously, even if at the end of the day, the only person who held him accountable was himself.

Jeongin: i’m sorry, sth came up and my aunt needs help i can’t mske it todsy

Without giving it a second thought, he hit ‘send’ and stuffed the device back in his suit, finally arriving at the crime scene. It hurt him, yes, it hurt him like hell to just leave Felix like that, but he didn’t have a choice. As long as he had his superpowers, he had to use them for the greater good. That’s what his parents would want, what his grandmother would expect. And while he indeed was on a break from daily patrols to heal, he couldn’t deny help when people’s lives were on the line.

Jeongin could already see it from afar—thick, dark plumes of smoke coiling into the sky, ominous and ruthless. As he concluded from a quick swing around the area, it was some kind of a factory, a two-story building now half-shrouded in flame and shadow. The epicenter of the fire seemed to be the massive magazine hall on the side, but it looked like the flames had already spread to other parts of the building. Jeongin felt a dreadful wave wash over him at the mere thought of all the people who might be trapped inside. He needed to move fast.

As the adrenaline kicked in, he plunged down and crashed into the building through the nearest door.

“Spider-Man, here! There are people inside, please, help them!” a woman ran up to him as soon as she saw him, coughing and covering her mouth with a piece of cloth.

There were many others around—probably factory workers—rushing toward the nearest exits. Some had to be carried by their coworkers, too weak from the smoke. The fire seemed to be spreading faster than normal, likely fueled by chemical substances stored throughout the building, or so Jeongin assumed. It was complete chaos.

He turned to the woman urgently. “Where exactly are they? Which way?”

She pointed toward the back of the building, her voice strained through the coughing. “The magazine hall—it’s the deepest part of the factory. That’s where the fire hit first. If anyone’s trapped, it’s there.”

Jeongin gave a sharp nod and sprinted inside, heading straight into the thickest smoke.

It was hard to see through the smoke, but he didn’t stop. He kept moving forward, passing people as they ran, helping some to their feet, checking their condition, making sure those who needed support had someone to help them out. He couldn’t turn back—not while there were still people inside. He wouldn’t leave until he made sure everyone was safe.

He kept shouting directions, checking every room, calling out for anyone who might be lost. Used his web to rip doors off their hinges, to secure unstable structures that could collapse and block escape routes. He was all in the job, all senses heightened, focused solely on pushing forward and getting to the magazine hall. He felt like a machine.

Once he reached the magazine hall, it was hard for him to breathe. The fire had already claimed most of the space, climbing up the towering stacks of crates, shelves, and storage racks together with their contents. Flames were consuming everything they could, filling the area with thick smoke and churning like a storm. If anyone was trapped here, in this stage it would be nearly impossible to escape—given that the person would still be conscious.

Some boxes above his head crackled and collapsed under the heat, sending embers spiraling upward. Somewhere else a whole high storage rack broke and fell with a loud crash, the impact pushing the flames and sending a wave of hot air straight into Jeongin’s face. He jumped away and ran somewhere else, screaming and calling for survivors.

Then—he heard it. A faint, strained voice from behind a fallen stack of metal shelving.

“Help…”

He sprinted toward the voice, clearing a path with his webs. After a moment, he saw her—a woman crouched in the corner, surrounded by flames, her leg trapped under a heavy metal beam. It was a miracle she was still awake, fighting with the metal to push it away. 

Jeongin immediately leaped in her direction, crouching down next to her. His eyes quickly analyzed the damage—for sure she was hurt, the question was how seriously. But there was no time to check. They needed to get the hell out of that building first.

“Don’t move, I’m going to get you out of here,” he said in a firm voice.

The woman just nodded weakly, letting out a weak groan. Her face was streaked with ash and sweat, the skin flushed and blotchy from the heat. She seemed to be very young, only a few years older than him, probably still in her twenties.

Making sure not to hurt the woman further, Jeongin lifted the beam with a grunt, pushing it to the side. The woman cried out in pain as the weight lifted off, blood dripping from an awful cut in her leg.

The boy didn’t waste time as he pulled her into his arms, carefully lifting her off the ground. There was no time to check the wound, they needed to leave the building immediately. The racks could collapse at any moment now and block their only way to escape.

It was hard to focus among the smoke, and Jeongin had completely lost track of time and distance. It was hard to tell how long it had taken him to get here, even harder to tell where the nearest exit was. For now, he just wanted to leave the magazine hall and get to the other part of the building.

Just as he was about to reach the massive doors, suddenly something cracked loudly above his head. Before he knew it, another towering rack came crashing down toward them, making his blood pump in his veins. He tried to dodge, twisting his body to shield the woman in his arms, but the smoke blinded him—and then a searing piece of metal scraped across his side, scorching his skin—right over the wound from the recent gunshot.

A raw scream tore from his throat as he stumbled, nearly dropping the woman to the floor. Pain struck him like lightning, sharp and immediate, blinding him as everything went white. He gritted his teeth, locking his arms around her tighter, forcing his legs to keep moving. It was like moving through hell, stuck between feeling nothing and everything at the same time. But still, he kept moving—pushing forward to leave the building, unsure if he hadn’t already become part of the fire himself.

When he staggered out of the building, he couldn’t even tell if he had been moving for seconds or centuries. The moment they were clear of the smoke, people rushed in, calling for help. Medics ran over and quickly took the woman from his arms, placing her on a stretcher and carrying her toward the ambulance.

“Spider-Man, are you okay?”

Jeongin barely registered when someone touched his shoulder as he stood up on his wobbly knees. He turned to the nearest firefighter with his hand pressed to his side, wobbling a little.

“I checked the whole building—everyone should be out. I don’t think anyone’s left inside,” he said urgently, pausing to catch his breath. “Make sure everyone’s safe. I can’t go back in. And be careful with the magazine hall, it’s all falling apart.” He patted the man’s arm and let a deep breath out, before stumbling backwards.

“Spider-Man, wait!”

People shouted around him, reaching out, offering help—but Jeongin couldn’t risk it. He had to leave, had to disappear before he would collapse and risk anyone getting too close. He didn’t think he was going to lose consciousness, not now when the adrenaline was coursing so fast through his bloodstream, but still, he was not sure if he could keep people away once they decided to force him onto a stretcher and carry him to an ambulance.

With his vision blurring, he managed to shoot a web and swing up onto a nearby structure, just high enough to escape the crowd’s reach. He swiftly climbed the wall, then jumped to another building, speeding up until he was in a full swing, drifting between the buildings, further and further away from the fire, searching for a proper place to hide.

Thoughts loomed in the depths of his mind that he should have stayed there, should have made sure once more that everyone was out of the building—but then, he didn’t think he would be able to hold there for too long, not when he had a gunshot wound torn and burned by hot metal. It was the first time for him to experience such a severe injury—earlier, they had been all manageable and able to heal within a couple of days at most. But this one was a combination he wasn’t sure how his body was going to cope with, and he really didn’t want to test it in the middle of fire.

It was hard to keep his balance and move forward when every tug of the web struck pain through his side. The ripped skin and muscle on his ribs stretched with each move, making the pain worse. He could feel the burning heat coming from the fresh wound and it was so awful that it made him sick. All he wanted was to lay down somewhere safe, stay there until it all went away.

He wasn’t even sure where he was going, just relied on the familiar routes and muscle memory as he leaped from one point to another, swinging and landing like he always did, and somehow always landing on his feet. It all became clear when his high school building appeared in his vision, his body clearly just having followed the route that he chose every morning.

He jumped onto the highest rooftop of the complex, trying to calm down his breath and examining the area. It seemed like there was nobody around, even the sports field was empty, despite such beautiful weather. He furrowed his brows, analyzing. Some students and staff members were still inside the school and library for sure. It was a definite no, there was no way he could hide anywhere in the main school building, it was too much of a risk.

He shot a web and jumped further, onto the top of the sports hall. If he was lucky and nobody was having any practice inside, then this would be the best spot to crash at. It wasn’t perfect, but it was better than any other place he could think of. Besides, he didn’t have enough energy to keep moving and at least it was certain that somewhere there he could find a first-aid kit, too.

Staying low and close to the surface, he slowly moved to peek through the window placed high under the ceiling. Once he made sure that the lights were off and there was nobody inside, he moved across the wall, looking for an open window. Finally he found one, obviously leading to a locker room—after all, they always stinked. He easily managed to open the window wider, then crawled inside, careful not to make any noise. The only thing he wished for was to crash down on the floor and never get up, but there was no way he could do that. First, he needed to make sure there was nobody around, and second—grab the first-aid kit.

It seemed like he had landed in the girl’s locker room, as he assumed from the ‘help yourself’ basked in the bathroom, filled with tampons, pads, and tissues. Good, it was safer than the boy’s room, especially the one of the football team—he couldn’t know for sure there wasn’t going to be any practice later, and the football team’s schedule tended to be quite hectic, especially before some more important championships. Still, he quietly entered the hall, straining his ears for any alarming sounds. Fortunately, it seemed like there was nobody around.

Soon he found the first-aid kit inside the coaches’ room, which he managed to open smoothly with a few quick moves of a pick, and retreated back to the girl’s locker room. He closed all the doors behind him and laid down in the furthest corner, right under the showers. He put the kit on the floor next to him, not really finding the energy to use it now. Breathing hard, he finally allowed himself to rest a little, tilting his head back and squeezing his eyes as a new wave of pain overflowed his senses. He didn’t even want to see his wound just yet, afraid he was going to throw up at the sight.

It felt nice to be finally laying down, not having to move even an inch—so nice that he was almost drowning in the feeling, despite the striking pain coming from his ribs. He kept blinking, trying to keep himself awake, but the darkness of the room wasn’t helping a bit, lulling him to sleep. Although the reasonable side of his mind kept screaming at him that he had to take care of the wound and get out of here, there was also the side that whispered sweet nothings—encouraging him to stay, mayhe to drown in the darkness. As the adrenaline washed away, it only now appeared to him how exhausted he was, tired from all the action and smoke, his body begging him to slow down and let it take care of the injury in peace.

Somewhere far away, maybe inside the sports hall, his senses registered some muffled pounding. It sounde like steps, maybe even running. He needed to get away from here but really—how could he? His body begged for just another moment, just a second, then he was going to hide… But why would anyone come here, to the girl’s bathroom? His eyes felt heavy, his mind was clouded, and before he knew it, before he could respond to the sounds—everything went dark.

𒌐

The first thing he registered when he woke up was pain. It wasn’t as bad as earlier, but still fresh and pulsing, never giving him a break. He kept his eyes closed, balancing between dreams and reality. Memories of fire and smoke flashed before his eyes, and he wanted to run, but he couldn’t really move, his body barely waking up. His hand involuntarily moved to his side, and he was surprised to discover that his suit was gone, and instead, there was a fresh bandage under his fingers. He flickered his eyes open and squeezed them shut immediately at the light, then opened them again and almost jumped straight up when he saw a blond head right next to him.

“Hey, easy, it’s just me.” A soft voice spoke, and then he felt a small hand grabbing his own.

Jeongin froze as his vision cleared into focus, showing him a freckled face surrounded by unruly blond strands, his cheeks flushed, eyes red and puffy. He stared at him for a moment, then turned his head to the side, noticing his red-and-blue suit hanging on one of the shower bars. That’s when panic flooded him, causing him to touch his face in a rush, then look down at his body—chest bare and legs covered in sports team shorts he didn’t even recognize.

“Calm down, Ayen, nothing is happening. Calm down, okay? Look at me.” The soft voice spoke again, and Felix gently grabbed Jeongin’s hands, pulling them close and stopping his movements. Breathing hard, Jeongin stared at the blond with wide eyes, his brain unable to fully comprehend what was happening.

“W-what are you doing here Felix? How– How did you find me?” he muttered in a low voice, his gaze never leaving the boy. He could only hope this was just a dream—a fever dream, a hallucination caused by all the strain he had gone through that day. But the more he stared, the more real Felix appeared.

The boy tightened his grasp on Jeongin’s hands. “I followed you, okay? Nobody else knows we’re here, I promise.”

But his words didn’t ease Jeongin even a tiny bit. His cheeks burned hot as blood rushed up from his beating heart, a choked sound escaping his throat as his breath quickened. He leaned forward, trying to calm his breathing, to understand what was happening. His suit on the rack, a fresh bandage wrapped over his torso, his mask off his face. Felix right next to him in the locker room, so close and so real, eyes open, witnessing everything he was never supposed to know.

Jeongin squeezed his eyes shut, wishing the floor would swallow him whole. “You… you saw,” he whispered, the words barely audible, slowly trying to address the situation.

“Yeah, Jeongin. I saw.” Felix’s voice was quiet, but his eyes never left Jeongin’s face. His touch was warm over his skin. “You’re Spider-Man.”

Jeongin wasn’t able to move his gaze up and just stared at the floor, his stomach churning. If the circumstances were different, maybe he would react differently, maybe he would try to deny it. Try to explain himself, come up with another stupid excuse and a lie just to protect not only himself but Felix too. But now there was no solution. His secret was out, the mask was off, and Felix saw it all. Jeongin felt like he was drowning.

“You’re hurt, Jeongin, that’s all that matters. It looked so bad, and you were barely breathing, I wasn’t sure you were even going to wake up,” Felix continued in a quiet, hoarse voice, breaking with every next word. A tear rolled down his already wet cheek, but he wiped it with a quick move of his hand, his body shaking with a loud sniffle.

Jeongin’s heart clenched as he finally looked up. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Felix let out another wet sniffle but ignored it, moving his hand up to the brunette’s face, gently brushing away his hair, which Jeongin just realized was probably all dirty and wet from sweat and smoke. Still, he melted at the soft touch, his body too exhausted to care, and too content with receiving such tenderness.

“I saw you come out of that fire. I knew you would be there as soon as I heard the sirens. It was on the news too, that the factory was on fire and at risk of collapsing,” Felix slowly explained, his fingers still brushing through Jeongin’s hair, keeping him locked in a daze. “Then I saw you come out of that smoke and flee the scene, all dirty and bloody, so I followed. I knew it was you. I knew it the moment I went back to the corridor and you weren’t there. Your stupid text message only confirmed it, too.”

Jeongin was quiet for a moment, the weight of the truth crashing down his chest like a heavy stone. He took another deep breath, finally coming to terms with the new turn of events. Felix knew, and there was nothing he could do to change it. Jeongin had never even entertained the idea of the boy discovering the truth—he always deluded himself into believing that he was capable of keeping it secret from anyone. Yet there he was, bare and exposed before the person he never thought he could become so close with. And now it felt like he was closer than anyone had ever been.

He moved to sit upright, grimacing when his injured side sent another wave of pain through his system. He took Felix’s free palm into his hands, allowing the other one to keep caressing his hair. His fingers moved across the soft skin of that palm, so small and delicate under his touch. He stared at it for a moment, pondering. There was nothing he could do about Felix knowing the truth. So he could at least try to protect him.

“I'm sorry I left you,” he rasped out.

“Shut up.” Felix demanded, sliding his hand to the back of Jeongin’s nape and pulling him closer until their foreheads were touching. They stayed like that for another moment, their breaths mingling, until Felix moved both of his hands to cup Jeongin’s face and let out a deep exhale. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“You weren’t supposed to know,” Jeongin added weakly, not moving an inch.

He was so exhausted, not only from his injuries but from all those emotions, too. He wondered how it had happened that Felix was now part of the truth. There were so many more things to explain, to make sure Felix was aware of all the dangers he had brought himself into. Jeongin barely managed to keep his two lives separated, so how could he keep Felix out of trouble now, too?

“We will talk about it later, okay? I don’t think now is the right time,” Felix said, his hand back brushing Jeongin’s hair. “Are you feeling any better? I don’t think we should stay here for too long.” He stared at him with concern, lips forming into a pout.

Jeongin slowly nodded. “How long have I been asleep?” he asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

“About an hour, I think,” Felix replied, his shoulders relaxing visibly as Jeongin seemed to regain a bit more awareness. “I managed to take care of your wound and borrowed some old jerseys from the coach’s office. I don’t think anyone will notice.” He glanced at the suit hanging next to them, tilting his head a little in worry. “Your suit will need some amendments though, the fire wasn’t very gracious to it.”

Jeongin closed his eyes with a tired sigh. “Yeah, that happens a lot, don’t worry.”

A small cough escaped his lips, the lingering effects of the smoke apparently still taking their toll on his lungs. He leaned forward a little to let it pass, while Felix brushed his shoulder reassuringly, observing him with genuine concern. Then he reached for his backpack propped against the wall and grabbed a half-full water bottle.

“Here, drink some,” he said, opening the bottle and moving it to his lips. “You probably haven’t drunk anything in a long time now.”

Jeongin grabbed the bottle and emptied it in barely a few seconds, only now realizing how parched he had been. Another cough attack followed once he finished drinking, but after that he could definitely feel a difference.

“Thank you,” he said, trying to catch his breath.

“Do you want me to get some more?” Felix asked, brushing loose strands from Jeongin’s forehead again. Jeongin melted into the touch, closing his eyes a little.

He shook his head. “No, it’s okay. It’s better if you stay here.”

“Of course.”

Jeongin moved back against the wall, resting his back against it. He looked down at the bandage, fingers lingering over the wound, hesitating to touch—and when he did, he hissed at the sudden pain. Even though it looked like Felix had done a great job at putting him back together, his body had gone through too much to heal immediately. Based on all his past injuries, he estimated he would need at least a week or more for the pain to ease.

“I needed to search google before I cleaned it, I’ve never seen something like this before,” Felix admitted, shifting to sit right next to him beside the wall, under a showerhead. “Does it hurt a lot?”

Jeongin smiled a little, his hand moving across the bandage that was wrapped all around his waist. “I think it will need some time before the pain stops, but it still feels better than before. You did a great job. You really found it all on the internet?” He cast the boy an amused glance.

Wrapping his arms around his knees as he pulled them close to his chest, Felix snorted out a small laugh. “Don’t even ask what I had to write to find proper answers. It’s not that easy to get a guide for patching up such a mess.”

Jeongin nodded with a giggle. “Right, maybe it’s better if I don’t ask.”

The laughter quickly dissipated and silence took over. Jeongin could feel a shift in the air, some new kind of tension coming from Felix’s body. He wondered how the boy was feeling. Surely, it must have been a lot to discover the city’s superhero identity, especially given their history. All those moments flashed before Jeongin’s eyes, the times when he’d met Felix as Spider-Man, when he hadn’t been aware of the face under his mask. Was he feeling betrayed now? Deceived? Jeongin couldn’t tell. In fact, he wasn’t even sure how he himself would feel in such a situation. He just hoped Felix wasn’t going to hate him.

“I’m–”

“I–”

Their voices collided silencing them both for a moment. One could almost feel the tension cracking in the air like electricity.

Jeongin shook his head. “Sorry, you go first.” He waved his hand, encouraging the freckled boy to continue.

Felix let out a long sigh and tilted his head back, staring at the ceiling. “I just wanted to ask. You know, during that robbery at Minho’s halmeoni’s store… It was you who got shot, wasn’t it? They got you with a bullet.”

Jeongin raised his eyebrows, not really expecting this question. “Yeah, it hit me right here.” He pointed at the wound hidden under the bandage. “But it wasn’t that bad, it just brushed my skin.”

“You mean ripped your skin. Apart.”

Jeongin bit his lip. “But the bullet didn’t even stay inside, it literally lasted a millisecond. It wasn’t as bad as it sounds.”

Felix arched his eyebrows high in disbelief, suddenly pushing away from the wall to properly look at him. “Wasn’t ‘as bad’? Ayen, you got shot! You get shot, you pretend nothing happens, then you have to stay home because you can barely walk, and then, after a few days you run straight into fire and get it all burned! And you say it’s… not as bad?!”

They stared at each other for a moment, Jeongin completely lost at his sudden outburst, and Felix apparently overwhelmed by all the emotions. Then, Felix closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall, letting out another shaky exhale and hiding his face in his palms. His shoulders slumped, and he took a moment, pressing his hands against his eyes and wiping the skin harshly.

“It’s just— I can’t understand it. How you go through all those things and then you still pretend it’s nothing. It’s not okay, Ayen.” He dropped his hands, scrubbing them roughly over his tired face before letting them fall heavily into his lap. Jeongin noticed a redness in his eyes. “I know that– that you’re not like an average person, but I don’t think you should underestimate your condition either. There’s always a limit.”

Jeongin remained silent, with no clue how to answer. Among all the scenarios for this afternoon, this was not the one he had imagined. It hadn’t even crossed his mind that Felix could suddenly discover his second identity. And now that it had happened, Jeongin felt… hollow. And so tired. As if he was feeling everything and nothing at once. Just a few hours ago he had been so happy and full of hope, and now it seemed like everything was collapsing over his head, just like that factory building he had escaped from. He thought that he had managed to bring everyone out of there, but maybe there was still a person he had forgotten about—himself.

Next to him, it seemed like Felix was barely holding his tears back. His body was shaking lightly with uncontrollable sobs that he seemed determined to suppress. Jeongin’s heart ached at the sight, but at the same time, he felt powerless. He couldn’t move, he had no clue what to do, how to react. It seemed like a wall was starting to build between them, despite Felix’s efforts to clear a path. And Jeongin had a feeling that, unconsciously, he was the one building it.

Because Jeongin was used to hiding his secrets—not sharing them.

And now, as he was forced to balance on this thin line between both, he suddenly found himself too terrified of the fall.

Before he could puzzle out a response, Felix spoke up again. “Does anyone know?”

Jeongin slowly shook his head, resigned. His eyes were fixed on his hands where he was nervously fiddling with his fingers. “No. You’re the first person to know. I’m sorry I dragged you into this.”

Felix let out a shaky breath. “I’ve figured it out already. That day, when we were working on the project…” he let out a weak chuckle, running a hand through his hair, “you said you ‘fell off a skateboard’ or something like that. It sounded like bullshit and right after that Minho told us about his halmeoni and... I guess that was when I started... noticing. All those things about you, you disappearing at random times at school, your posture, your voices being so similar. Then Spider-Man disappearing the same time you became sick.”

Jeongin turned his head to get a shy glance of the boy, but Felix already tilted his head back, now staring at the ceiling with shimmers in his eyes, as if searching for solutions. His lower lip trembled a little before he continued. “So when today you just disappeared again with all those sirens screaming outside... that’s when I knew I was right.”

Of course. Of course Felix would figure it out. After all, he was the school president for a reason. He could see through people, maybe even more than he should. And Jeongin, so recklessly, had allowed himself to get too close to the sun, flying blindly like a moth to a flame. And now he was falling like Icarus, dragging poor Felix along with himself. Because of course Felix would figure it out, especially after they had become so close. He was just too considerate not to.

Jeongin brought his hands up to his temples, rubbing at the skin, before he dropped them down again. He turned to Felix, observing him for a moment. The boy was staring blankly into space before himself, arms wrapped around his knees, thumbs drawing circles around his knuckles. His eyes were still red and the freckled cheeks carried wet traces of single tears he had shed before in all this mess. 

They were sitting so close to each other, shoulders almost brushing, yet it all felt so distant. Jeongin couldn’t figure out what was going to happen next. Was there even anything else to come after this moment? It seemed like they were bound to stay in this bathroom forever. And even forever didn’t sound like enough time for him to finally get a grip of himself.

He knew he was supposed to say more, to get control over this situation. It was all his responsibility, to keep Felix out of this, to keep his two lives separated. The more he wondered, the clearer he could remember all those times when he had acted so recklessly, each choice and action finally leading to this moment. It didn’t matter whether Felix discovered it today by an accident or whether he knew it already. In every scenario, it was always Jeongin who had fucked it all up in the beginning, allowing himself to get blinded by that selfish dream of happiness.

And now when he finally realized that him being Spider-Man was never supposed to be discovered by anybody, it was too late.

But still, what was he supposed to do about it now? There were no words or actions that could turn back time. Felix knew, and nothing was going to change it. He knew, and he was still right by his side, even though it seemed like the world was crashing over his head. He could have run away, he could have gone and told everybody, he could have screamed at him for playing with his feelings. And yet he had stayed by his side, cleaned his wounds, and waited for him to make a decision. Because he cared.

Now it was Jeongin’s turn to take care of him instead.

Throwing away all the pride and doubts that had been keeping him at bay, Jeongin finally turned to Felix, fueled by a new kind of determination. Ignoring a sharp pang of pain that shot through his body at the sudden movement, he wrapped his arms around the smaller boy, pulling him close into a strong embrace. He had no clue what was going to happen next, but one thing he was certain about was that there was no way he could leave the boy all by himself now.

The instant Felix’s weight settled against him, a violent shudder tore through the boy’s body. It was as if Felix had been holding everything inside, and Jeongin couldn’t even imagine how hard it must have been to pretend to be okay just so Jeongin wouldn’t have to witness it. But he preferred it this way—he would rather see Felix go through any kind of emotions openly than hold anything back. Especially now, when there was nothing left to hide anymore.

“I’m so sorry, Felix,” he muttered into his hair, reassuringly brushing his back. “Thank you for finding me here, thank you for everything. I can’t tell what could happen if you didn’t take care of me.”

“You would turn into a cocoon of web, you stupid spider,” Felix replied back through sobs, his voice muffled by their embrace, yet still able to make Jeongin chuckle a little.

“Right, that. But you wouldn’t let me, would you?”

Felix shook his head. “Never.”

Jeongin turned a little to kiss his temple, and held him close, swaying them both until the boy stopped crying.

It was hard to tell how much time had passed when Felix finally let go of him, gently pushing himself off his chest. As he reached for his backpack to grab some tissues, Jeongin’s hand immediately raised to his face, helping to wipe away all the traces of tears. Felix cast him a grateful smile before cleaning his face and blowing his nose loudly.

“I’ll go and wash my face, I’m probably all red by now,” he chuckled nervously, still sniffling a little.

Jeongin nodded with a soft smile, his hand now moving to put Felix’s ruffled hair in order. “Go, I’ll wait here.”

When the boy disappeared into the other part of the bathroom with the sinks, Jeongin took a deep breath and ran a hand through his own hair. He could feel its greasiness, but it was the least of his worries. He glanced down at the bandage wrapped tight around his body. It was mostly clean, with just a few small bloodstains that must have appeared when Felix was putting it on, which was inevitable given the extent of the injury. Still, Jeongin was impressed by how well the boy had managed to patch him up.

He pressed a protective hand to his ribs and took a deep breath. Grabbing the metal rail attached to the wall, he slowly pushed himself up. His muscles felt stiff and constricted, but he managed to stay on his feet without too much trouble. The wound still hurt, but the pain was bearable, and he figured he would get used to it enough to move in a few minutes.

His eyes fell on his suit hanging right behind him. He had barely finished sewing it up a few days ago, and now it was dirty and damaged all over again. A wave of frustration washed over him. Not only was he hurt, but with a suit in shreds as an addition. Just great.

Another issue he noticed right away was the lack of his backpack—of course, he must have left it somewhere in the school bathroom before he had fled through a window to chase the firetrucks. He needed to get it back soon, and without any witnesses. With all due respect, the last thing he wanted was to go back home in just a pair of old football shorts.

Before he could take another step, Felix was already back, peeking his head from behind the doorframe. “Oh, you’re up already? Are you all right? Can you stand? Just wait a second!” Then he disappeared, only to rush back after a moment, immediately moving to secure Jeongin by the arm. “Are you sure you can walk?” he asked, his eyes wide with worry.

Jeongin nodded firmly. “Yes, we should get out of here already. I don’t want to risk anybody coming here.”

“I guess you’re right, it’s getting late,” Felix said, glancing around the room in a rush. He snatched his backpack from the floor. “Alright, let’s go. Wait, do you have your backpack? Or should I, like… hide this suit for you?” He spun on his heel, his eyes darting around the room before landing back on Jeongin. “Wait, I didn’t get you any shirt! You can’t parade around with all these bandages out!”

Jeongin gave an awkward grimace and scratched his neck. “Riiiight… You don’t happen to have a matching jersey for these shorts, do you? My backpack’s at school, so just anything will do for now, before we get it back.”

“Oh, yes, sure, a jersey! Just give me a sec!”

And then he ran out of the room, before Jeongin could even blink.

“Funny thing, I’m pretty sure this one belonged to my coworker,” Felix noticed lightly as he handed him a black jersey with white and red elements. On the back, there was a huge number ‘03’ and on top of it a name—‘Bang’.

“I hope he won’t mind me borrowing it for a minute,” Jeongin replied, already pulling the shirt over his head. “All right, now we can go. Let’s find my backpack quickly, I don’t really feel like dressing up as a football player.”

Felix arched an eyebrow and smirked, glancing over his posture. “I have to admit, it quite suits you though. But obviously, that Spider-suit is much more of a loss.”

After stuffing the Spider-Man suit into Felix’s backpack and cleaning the bathroom from any traces of blood using water from the showers, they finally left the girl’s locker room. As soon as they stepped into the sports hall, Felix wrapped his hand around Jeongin’s waist to support him, careful not to touch the wound—and even though Jeongin was probably completely capable of walking on his own, he figured that a little help wasn’t going to hurt him.

“I was surprised nobody was having a practice today,” Jeongin commented as they walked towards the passage connecting the school building with the sports hall. Fortunately, there was nobody in sight, not even a caretaker.

“I don’t know much about schedules, but football players have practice depending on their tournaments and the volleyball team meets mostly on Thursdays, I think. They also practice outside a lot, when the weather’s good,” Felix explained. “Hyunjin mentioned something about working out with Changbin today, I guess they went to the gym earlier.”

“Convenient timing,” Jeongin stated. 

“Right,” Felix gave a cheesy smile as he tilted his head to send him a look. “Perfect for you to pass out in a locker room.”

Jeongin breathed out a laugh at that, shaking his head a little. Despite the pain still gnawing at his side, he felt so relaxed around Felix—especially now, when he knew and when he was so close. Feeling butterflies flutter in his stomach at the sight of Felix’s cute smile, he leaned in a little and placed a quick kiss on his temple.

“And perfect for you to find me there,” he said with a huge grin.

A blush covered Felix’s freckled cheeks as he laughed it off. “You know, we still need to talk about it.” He cleared his throat. “About us, I mean.”

Jeongin nodded his head immediately, suddenly feeling embarrassed by his own behavior. Was he crossing the line? Maybe Felix wasn’t comfortable with him showing so much affection. Sure, Felix had been the one to kiss him first, but that could have happened in the heat of the moment, and besides, they still hadn’t established the actual nature of their relationship. Jeongin just found it natural to shower the boy with soft kisses from time to time, he just couldn’t resist. However, he didn’t take into consideration the fact that Felix might not be comfortable with things moving so fast. Was it even okay for Jeongin to act this way? He couldn’t tell, his actual dating experience equaled zero.

A crease formed between his eyebrows as he glanced at the boy uncertainly, doubts clouding his head. “I’m sorry, did I make you uncomfortable?” he asked.

“Uncomfortable?” Felix whispered, his voice low and quick as he glanced through the glass door that connected the sports hall with the main school building, before pushing it open. “Jeongin, no. Never that.” As they stepped into the quiet corridor, he cast him a shy look, little sparkles shining in his eyes. “I just… I just prefer to know first what exactly we’re standing at. That’s all.”

“Yes, of course, that makes sense.” Jeongin let out a quiet breath, a wave of relief washing over him. He knew he should focus on their destination as they entered the school, but his nerves were taking over. Words flew out of him in a nervous tumble before he could stop them. “It’s– you know, I–I never really was in a relationship so if I ever do something weird or too much, then… I mean, I’m not saying we’re in a relationship, just hypothetically…”

Echoed voices from behind them made him quiet and he instinctively pulled Felix into a different corridor, rushing his steps as they got closer to the bathroom.

The blond immediately turned his head to assess the situation. “Did you hear something?” he whispered.

“Yeah, somebody was coming. But don’t worry, we’re almost there.”

They kept quiet until they reached the bathroom, and a wave of relief washed over Jeongin when he saw his backpack lying right where he had left it. Letting go of Felix, he crouched down next to it while the other boy turned on the lights.

The sudden brightness of the fluorescent lights made him feel dizzy, and colorful dots flickered before his eyes. He lost his balance and swayed to the side, having to prop himself up on his hand for a moment. The quiet hum of the light bulbs wasn’t making it any better.

Felix jumped to his side immediately. “Innie, are you okay? What’s wrong? You look pale.” He glanced around the bathroom nervously, then kneeled down beside him, placing a helpful hand on his back. “Take a deep breath, okay?”

Jeongin nodded his head and closed his eyes for a moment, placing his hands on his knees and trying to put himself together. In the meantime, Felix reached for his backpack and pulled out the clothes he had messily stuffed inside. After a moment, he finally opened his eyes and slowly nodded his head.

“All right, I’m fine. Let’s keep moving.” He let out a deep breath and gratefully took the T-shirt Felix handed him. He hesitated, suddenly unsure if he should just take off his clothes in front of the boy.

A fresh wave of awkwardness washed over him as he looked at the T-shirt in his hand. He glanced at Felix, then at the jersey he was wearing, and finally down at the floor, his cheeks flushing. But before he could say anything, the blond already reached forward, grabbing the hem of the jersey and gently pulling it up.

“There, let me help you,” he spoke softly with a focused, worried frown, probably mistaking Jeongin’s hesitation for indisposition.

Words died in his throat out of surprise, and he just followed along, moving his hands up to guide the borrowed jersey over his head. Felix’s touch was light and careful as he helped him put his shirt on, then stand up and exchange the football shorts for his jeans.

“I’ll put the clothes back tomorrow, don’t worry about it,” Felix said, pulling the Spider-Man suit out of his backpack and stuffing the jersey in its place. He then hid the suit in Jeongin’s backpack, folding it carefully, and finally stood up, casting him another worried look. “Are you ready to go? I’ll help you get home.”

Jeongin nodded, then let out a tired sigh and dragged a hand over his face. “Shit, Aunt Sohee, I forgot. She will totally notice.”

He turned and propped his hands on a sink, looking at his reflection in the mirror—pale face, tired eyes, hair greasy and disheveled. There was no way Aunt Sohee was going to believe any of his lies, especially when he told her he needed to stay home for a few days. He needed to come up with something convincing enough for her not to give it a second thought.

“Right, she doesn’t know.” Felix furrowed his eyebrows as he scratched his chin, thinking profoundly. “Maybe we can say you got a virus or something? I’ll walk you home and tell her you suddenly felt weak and dizzy, that maybe there was something in the food. Some bacteria or virus or whatever.”

Jeongin slowly nodded. “Right, stomach flu or something. This can last long enough, I’ll just have to act it out.”

“What if she wants you to go to the doctor?”

The brunette just waved his hand dismissively. “She probably will, but don’t worry, I’ll convince her it’s not that bad.” He glanced one last time at his reflection, then moved to grab his backpack.

But Felix was already holding it, staring at him with hesitation. “Are you sure you can carry it?”

Jeongin resisted the urge to roll his eyes, tilting his head instead with an amused smile. “I wouldn’t let you carry that for me. C’mon, I’m well enough.” He grabbed the backpack with one hand and moved the other to put Felix’s hair behind his ear with affection. “You already did so much.”

Felix just sighed in resignation. “Fine, but if you need a break, just tell me. I can carry a backpack, but not you if you pass out again.”

Jeongin felt his cheeks heat up—it was in fact a bit embarrassing for Felix to have found him in such a state, when he thought about it. He brushed it off quickly. “Hopefully I won’t, not after you took care of me so well.”

“Oh, you better not.” The shorter boy just gave him a serious look, opening the door to the corridor. He peered out to make sure the coast was clear, then gestured for Jeongin to follow. “Nobody in sight, we can go.”

Jeongin swung the backpack over his shoulders and followed Felix out of the bathroom. His steps were small and his sight blurred from time to time, but he clenched his teeth and ignored it. It wasn’t the first time when he needed to act upon his injuries, and he didn’t want to waste more of Felix’s time being unable to at least get back home. He already destroyed their plans for the afternoon, so he could at least not be a baby and walk on his own feet.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t get those ice-cream today. The weather was perfect for it,” he said in a sad voice, matching his steps with Felix’s.

Felix gave a small shrug. “You didn’t have much choice, did you? I understand. We can make up for it another time, when you get better.” He cast him a reassuring smile and reached out to lace their fingers together.

Jeongin couldn’t help a wave of giddiness at his words. He arched a cocky eyebrow. “Are you asking me on a date?”

Felix turned his head immediately with a huge grin. “Sure thing, I am. And you better make sure to actually show up this time. I can understand much but I won’t let you play with me, Spider. Just so you know that,” he teased, nudging him gently with his shoulder.

The brunette let out a laugh. “I’ll make sure the next time will be perfect,” he promised, looking at him with affection.

Their eyes locked together, and Jeongin felt himself melting when he again noticed those sparkles of genuine care, maybe even happiness. It hit him right there that Felix actually liked him back—after all they had gone through together in such a short time, it felt almost surreal to remember how distant they had been in the past. In fact, Jeongin couldn’t believe his own luck.

The moment was quickly interrupted when suddenly they were no longer alone, almost bumping into two other students who appeared from behind the corner. Jeongin flinched, his eyes wide with surprise—he had been so lost in his head that he hadn’t even noticed any sign of somebody approaching.

Felix squeezed his hand as they came into a halt. “G-guys! Hey!” he stammered, his voice coming out in a high-pitched squeak as his cheeks went crimson.

“Oh, hi!” Changbin gave them a happy wave, while Hyunjin just nodded, his mouth stuffed with a protein bar.

“What are you doing here?” Felix stammered, and Jeongin could feel his grip on his hand tightening a bit more.

Changbin gave him a soft frown. “What do you mean? We were at the gym, obviously.” He pointed at the duffel bag propped on his arm.

“Here? So late?” Jeongin asked out of the blue.

Hyunjin finally swallowed the last of his protein bar, now wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and giving him a weird look. “What are you surprised about, don’t you use it late, too?” He waved his hand, vaguely indicating his posture. “I mean, I never really saw you there, so I assumed you went there in the evenings or something. We usually go right after classes,” he explained.

Jeongin’s brain stopped working for a second, but the gears quickly screeched back into action. He awkwardly nodded, bringing a hand up to the nape of his neck. “Riiight, I do! Sometimes.” He chuckled nervously. He didn’t even know they had a gym at school, but hell yeah, screw that.

“But what are you two doing here now?” Changbin’s gaze swept over them, doubtful. “Weren’t you supposed to be on a date or something?”

This time it was Felix who stepped in, his fingers squeezing Jeongin’s again in a nervous reflex.

“What? Oh, no, we were! We were on a date,” he stammered, his eyes darting between Hyunjin and Changbin. “But… but then Jisu reminded me about those forms I needed to get done for the headmaster, that’s why we came back,” he explained, a little too quickly, pointing at the stairs next to them. “We were just about to fetch them.”

Hyunjin let out a dramatic sigh of disappointment. “Oh man, that sucks. A date ruined by stupid school again. I hope you at least got to enjoy yourselves,” he pouted, giving them a short uplifting pat on the shoulders. “Well, we’re just about to get some protein now, so we won’t hold you back. Don’t have too much fun in that office.” He wiggled his eyebrows, turning around on his heels.

“See you guys at school tomorrow.” Changbin gave them a nod before following Hyunjin down the corridor.

It wasn’t until the sound of their footsteps faded that Felix finally let out a long, shaky breath of relief, running his palm over his face. Meanwhile, Jeongin just stared at him with amusement, the corners of his lips twitching.

“What?” Felix asked, noticing his stare.

Jeongin shook his head, breathing out a laugh. “I see I’m not the only one giving lame excuses on the spot,” he remarked. 

“Whatever.” Felix rolled his eyes, snickering. “Now, c’mon, before we bump into anyone else.” 

He pulled him by the arm and Jeongin followed obediently, not even trying to suppress the grin that forced its way onto his lips. It seemed like they not only shared a secret now, but also a lie—and Jeongin just couldn’t believe it.

He let out a heavy breath when they stepped outside the building, his body swaying with exhaustion after having to move for such a long time. But even though his legs felt like they could buckle at any moment, he couldn’t stop beaming.

It was ridiculous, this whole situation. He should be still lying on those bathroom tiles right now, weak and hopeless, all alone. His skin had been burnt and it hurt like hell—maybe so much that he could barely even register it anymore. And yet it all didn’t matter, as his whole attention was on Felix. That little ray of sunshine, always shining, always there. And now his presence was working like a drug, overwhelming and addicting. Turning his pain into a dull hum, a distant noise in the background, that didn’t stand a chance when all his senses were focused only on Felix, Felix, Felix.

“What are you laughing at, huh?” Felix accused as he turned around, trying to maintain a serious face. “We need to get you home, what are you doing?” he asked, tilting his head in annoyance, but the corners of lips twitched, too.

Jeongin stumbled closer, reaching out to cup his cheeks. Felix’s eyes widened in surprise, and his hands immediately rose up to steady him, afraid he was going to fall. But Jeongin was just so, so happy. He couldn’t stop thinking about it—that Felix had found him, patched him up, stayed by his side until he woke up. Despite the pain tearing his skin, despite all the fatigue, all he could think about was him.

“I’m sorry. I just really want to kiss you right now,” he breathed out, slowing down to look at him properly. Felix was so pretty, with his shimmering eyes and freckles spread like constellations. Jeongin wanted to kiss them all.

Felix watched him for a moment, his lips twitching into a smile. He raised a hand to Jeongin’s face and touched it gently, his breath hitching as he took a deep inhale. Then, before Jeongin could react, before his tired brain could comprehend what was happening—his palm slid to the back of his neck, and after one last nervous breath, he pulled him closer. Crashing their lips together so fast that it stole the air from his lungs. Stopping time and accelerating it all at once, like an explosion. Like a supernova.

There it was again—that warmth overwhelming all his senses, that blooming in his stomach, the tingles on his skin. But this time Jeongin leaned in, deepening the kiss. Feeling like he was flying, floating on a cloud. He giggled when the boy stumbled, losing balance as he was standing on his toes to reach him, and his hands immediately traveled down to his shoulder, steadying him. Then down to his waist, pulling him closer. So, so close.

Felix moaned in surprise, his body swaying to the side as all he relied on was just Jeongin’s grip. A soft giggle escaped him, and he wrapped his arms even higher around his neck, drawing him even closer, pulling at his hair. He parted his lips slightly, then moved again, sloppy and wet, leading them both into a new rhythm—one that made Jeongin see stars.

It was hard to tell how long it had lasted—maybe seconds, maybe hours—as they only parted when all oxygen was completely out of their lungs, their foreheads pressed together, heavy breaths mingling. Jeongin closed his eyes, and colorful dots appeared, causing him to lose his balance and stumble. Felix immediately caught him before he could fall.

“We need to get you home,” he whispered when Jeongin regained his balance, still breathing heavily. “No more kisses until you get better, I’m sorry.”

Jeongin just nodded his head weakly and let the boy slowly guide him toward the bus stop, carefully, step by step. Cold shivers ran down his skin and his mind was back on planet earth, actually beating to the alarm. His body was exhausted, and it seemed like he kept testing its limits.

“Are you sure you’re all right? You’re so pale,” Felix said once they finally sat down, bringing the back of his palm to Jeongin’s forehead.

“I’m fine, just… tired,” he mumbled, trying to keep his voice light.

“I swear to god, when I put you back in bed, you’re grounded for life. And I mean it, Jeongin.” Felix stared into his eyes, grasping his hands firmly, “No more playing superhero until you get better. Promise me.”

Jeongin’s stomach churned, but kept his gaze locked with Felix’s. “I promise.”

And maybe for once, he was actually going to listen.

Felix watched him for another moment, then gave a small nod, biting his lip. He leaned in, resting his head on Jeongin’s shoulder as they both went silent, processing the moment. Jeongin felt a shiver pass over his skin as a gentle evening breeze blew into his face. He turned his head and nuzzled his cheek in the blond locks, taking in the proximity.

“Remember when I said that I liked you?” he mumbled quietly, unable to keep his stream of thoughts just for himself. Felix just nodded his head and hummed, staying quiet. “I really meant it then.” He let out an embarrassed chuckle. “I’ve liked you for a while, actually. You were always around, collecting signatures for those petitions, making surveys, or just looking for volunteers for school contests. Always so kind and smiling, it was impossible not to notice you. You were kind of a crush to me, I guess. Always making me blush like a fool.”

Felix shuffled a little in his seat, his blond hair brushing Jeongin’s cheek. “Well, you’ve always been the smart guy to me. I remember you and Seungmin always winning all those science tournaments, right? In the first year or two, I think. But then you quit.” He laughed softly. “And I think I know why.”

Jeongin hesitated for a moment, unable to ignore the unsettling feeling in his stomach. Now, when all the euphoria had washed off and he was starting to think clearly again, he couldn’t ignore the position in which the newly acquired knowledge was putting the freckled boy. He needed to make sure that Felix understood the risk. But it was hard to put it into the right words.

Pulling back a little on the bench, he shifted to face him. He gently lifted Felix’s chin with one hand and held his hand firmly with the other, calling for his attention. Felix’s eyes shimmered with confusion as he looked at him.

“I– I wanted to ask you but–” Jeongin shifted in his seat, unable to speak the words out loud. He felt his cheeks heat up but just shook his head, lowering his gaze to their intertwined hands. “I just, I like you so much, but I need you to… you need to know that it may be dangerous. Nobody ever knew and I just… I just don’t want to put you at any risk.”

Felix stared at him for a moment, taking in the words. Then let out an amused chuckle, shaking his head in disbelief. “You think I would leave you alone just to protect myself? Never.” His hand traveled up to brush a stray strand of hair from Jeongin’s face, his expression softening. “You’re stuck with me now. I’m not leaving you alone.”

He brought their foreheads together again, and for a moment all Jeongin could hear was the rhythm of their heartbeats. He could feel Felix’s warmth, smell the blend of his natural scent and fading perfume. His words were stuck in his head like a prayer and his heartbeat quickened. Because deep down, it had always been so heavy, so shattering to keep it all to himself. But now Felix was there—and he wasn’t going to leave.

A shiver ran down his spine as he brought his hands up to his face, cupping it again. “I would kiss you again, but you ordered me not to,” he admitted, causing them both to laugh.

Felix tilted his head, giving him a teasing look. “Who do you think you are to kiss me? My boyfriend?”

Jeongin hesitated, his expression wavering out of surprise. His gaze swept over Felix’s face, looking for clues. “You– I mean– Do we…?” he only managed to stammer out, the words catching in his throat as his brain went completely foggy.

Felix blinked, then shook his head in disbelief, bursting out a laugh. “Yah, you silly– I thought it was obvious already! You even kissed me a moment ago, don’t you remember?” His eyes sparkled as he leaned in, with the prettiest smile Jeongin had ever seen. “I told you, you’re stuck with me now. And you still owe me a date.”

Jeongin slowly gathered himself back together, a strange giddiness bubbling up inside him. He shook his head eagerly, letting out a happy, surprised laugh.

“Yes, sure, I’ll, um, I will take you. Wherever you want,” he breathed out, his mouth stretching out into a grin. He couldn’t hold back his laugh.

Felix was grinning, too. He leaned in, leaving a quick peck on his lips. “But first, you need to get better. Okay?”

“Okay.” Jeongin nodded, watching him with so much admiration. He couldn’t take his eyes off. He hoped he would never have to. “You said no kisses until I get better,” he pointed out with a teasing grin.

Felix arched an eyebrow. “But don’t you feel better?”

“Right now? I feel perfect.” Jeongin’s grin widened as he tilted his head again, a low chuckle rumbling in his chest. “Do I get another one, then?”

“You’re a sly fox, aren’t you?” The blond breathed out a laugh, but then leaned in again, rewarding him with another soft kiss, this time a bit longer. “Here, satisfied?”

“Not quite,” Jeongin smiled and connected their lips for yet another time, too happy to pull back.

Butterflies fluttered in his stomach. It was so soft, so lovely, so endearing. They kept exchanging kisses, gentle pecks accompanied by their giggles. And Felix tasted so, so sweet that he couldn’t get enough. He stole another one, then placed one on his cheek, and finally pulled back. He stared at his face for a moment, his fingers curiously brushing the freckles spread across his skin. 

“They are so pretty. Like stars,” he said, tracing the constellation right around his eye.

It was enough to make Felix blush. “Thanks.”

The bus rolled down the street into its lane, stopping in front of them with a loud huff of its engine. With their hands clasped together, they stood up and entered, taking the two free seats somewhere in the back. At this time of the day it was nearly empty, providing the sort of peace they needed.

With Felix’s head resting on his shoulder and their fingers intertwined, Jeongin allowed his thoughts to wander. He was trying to sort out the facts of today, determine the position he had settled in. One, his secret was out, and two, the person who knew was now his boyfriend. But even though it wasn’t the scenario he had imagined, he couldn’t complain. When he thought about it, maybe that even made things easier—now there was nothing left to hide. And that itself was a huge relief.

Taking a glance at the boy beside him, his heart swelled with a new certainty. He had never been good at determining his next moves, he never knew what was going to happen—until it just happened. But now, as he looked at Felix, one thing was undeniably clear—because he knew for a fact that now, he was going to protect that boy. From anything. And at all costs.

Chapter Text

Sometimes, Felix found it hard to distinguish anguish from happiness.

It had been almost a week after they started dating, and a week after he discovered that Jeongin was Spider-Man. Felix could hardly believe those two things were his reality now, but surprisingly Jeongin’s superheroic alter ego wasn’t the biggest of his concerns. In fact, once he discovered the truth, it didn’t matter that much—what mattered most was that Felix found himself constantly worrying about him and about his well-being.

He thought about it often. How Jeongin was all alone with this secret, having to pretend he was all right even after a bullet had torn his skin apart. How he had to ditch his friends all the time and feed them lies only to sacrifice himself for the sake of the whole city. How he didn’t want Felix or anyone close to him to know because he was too afraid of the dangers such knowledge could expose them to. He thought about it all, and his heart ached because he had no idea how he could ever match this level of sacrifice.

And maybe that was what made their separation feel so heavy on his mind. Because the more Felix was left alone to his thoughts, the more he was afraid of the responsibility he was now bound to. It was easy for him to be there for somebody—to be the one on the receiving point, providing support and offering a helpful hand. Being a keeper to somebody else’s secret, without much light shining on himself. But it was a whole different story when he realized that in a relationship, it was better for both sides to be equally vulnerable.

Weight pressed heavily on his chest each time he remembered that there was no way in this world for him to be able to show Jeongin his part of the story. The pages he had never shown to anyone—the evil backstory of his life, hidden like a legend because the sole thought of it being revealed felt like it could destroy all that Felix had fought so hard to build. And even hidden, it kept casting destructive shadows over his life, slowly leading to his own ruin.

Like a crack on his bubble of perfection, a flaw that disabled him to provide the one thing every healthy relationship required. Mutual trust. Mutual vulnerability. The permission of them both to be there for each other no matter what. Even though Felix was perfectly aware of the fact that he and Jeongin were barely at the crawling stage, it still pained his heart to realize that he was already struggling with opening up.

As always, he was the one causing trouble.

Thinking about it now, his love life had never been very adventurous. He’d had a few fleeting crushes and some awkward first kisses, but never anything that lasted beyond a few weeks. There had been that one guy in the break after middle school who seemed genuinely interested in building something real—but it had lasted barely three months before the boy began to lose interest, becoming more and more distant, until his emotionless text message had ended their relationship for good.

After that, Felix hadn’t felt like getting into a relationship again. He tended to easily get too emotionally involved with people, always trying his best to please them and keep them close. He had been lucky to find friends who truly appreciated him for who he was and never tried to take advantage of his commitment. When it came to his love life, however, Felix wasn’t as open to getting involved with people as he had been before. At first, he had been too heartbroken to even think about it, and later he got too involved in gaining extra points for university to have time for meeting new people. And even when he did meet some, they never stuck around for too long, always repelled by his tendency to form excessive emotional involvement.

But these were only small parts of his problem, as his biggest curse was one nobody but him could see—his mother. With every new year after his father had left them, her drinking was becoming worse and worse, as if time only deepened her misery. She had become unpredictable, her actions depending on her mood and her own relationships—and just like Felix, she didn’t seem to have it easy. 

Sometimes the boy tried to justify her behavior to his father, having left her alone with the child all those years ago, but it still hurt to know that she didn’t love him at all. She never tried to. Felix had been a burden to her from the very moment she had learnt she was pregnant, and as he grew up, it seemed like all his actions had been bringing only more and more hardships, no matter how hard he tried. But the biggest problem was simply his sole existence—it was hard for the woman to form a new life, find a new partner when there was a child stuck to her side. So while she never really left him to the wolves, she still blamed him for every trouble in her life.

It wasn’t easy then to get close with other people when he wasn’t even able to tell his best friends about what he was going through at home. Even though deep down he knew they would never judge him for who his mother was, it just felt too embarrassing to share this piece of his life with anybody. They knew that something was wrong, of course they knew, because Felix had never been great at keeping his emotions at bay. But they never got the details because Felix’s whole world would collapse if his mother got to destroy even the little bubble of perfection he had managed to create for himself at school.

There was simply no way Felix could share this piece of his life with anybody—so how could he dedicate himself to forming a deep bond with somebody, when he was unable to show the other person all his true colors? He knew he was already a lot to handle—with all his insecurities, the constant need for validation, the deep desire for people to see him as useful and trustworthy. But sharing the part of his life that hurt him the most—he wasn’t sure if he was brave enough for that.

And all that made his heart clench, because every time he thought of Jeongin, he also thought of all those things he wasn’t brave enough to tell him. But how could he tell the boy that all he had fallen for was just an illusion?

“Are you okay, Felix?”

A soft voice brought him out of his thoughts as he was staring at his phone, sitting beside a counter on the cold kitchen tiles. His workplace provided a decent room for the workers to spend breaks at, but somehow Felix always found himself spending it right next to the door to the storage room. The only place in the whole restaurant where the sounds from the main hall couldn’t reach.

He looked up from the screen and found Chan standing in the doorway, his body leaned against the frame as he stared at him with a worried expression.

He switched off the device, offering a soft smile. “I’m fine, why?”

“I mean, you seemed so happy all week, but today you’re…” Chan waved his hand vaguely, trying to show what he couldn’t quite tell. “I just thought I would ask.”

Felix nodded, thinking for a moment. It must have been him getting lost in his thoughts again. For the past week, he had been doing that a lot, even though most of his free time had been spent texting or video calling Jeongin—in fact, whenever he had a moment to spare.

The boy had been stuck at home all that time, and as far as Felix knew, his wounds still required more time to heal. It was a miracle, really, how they had managed to convince Jeongin’s aunt that he was suffering from a stomach flu. It sounded ridiculous, but at the same time, it was perfect for their scenario. It had worked even better when Felix, in the heat of the moment, had told the woman that he might be the one who had infected her nephew. He had explained that they just couldn’t stay away from each other as soon as Felix had gotten better, and now Jeongin was sick, so maybe it was better if aunt Sohee didn’t come too close, so as not to catch it herself. It was a perfect, perfect lie, and it had even become a running inside joke between them, as they couldn’t believe how easy it had been to make it convincing.

Now, as they had to keep the lie working, neither Felix nor anyone else was allowed to visit the brunette—so instead, they just spent every free minute texting each other.

And there wouldn’t be anything weird about it, if not for the fact that every time Jeongin asked him how he was doing, Felix always felt like the ugliest of liars.

Noticing his hesitation, Chan crouched down to sit on the floor next to him. “It’s about that boy, right? The one you’ve been texting.”

Felix let out a sigh, his head hitting the wall as he tilted it back. “Yeah, I guess you can say so,” he admitted, deciding that if there was anyone he could actually open up to about this situation, then it could only be Chan.

“So, what happened?” The man asked, his voice warm and encouraging.

Felix scratched his forearm as he searched for the right words, avoiding eye contact. It was hard to explain what happened, because nothing really happened—everything that pained him was just a figment of his own brain. A shadow of things he kept in himself and never allowed to let go.

“I guess, I just… Don’t know how to open up,” he said straightforwardly, fiddling with his fingers. “I mean, he’s so perfect. So kind, cute, considerate, and… Recently I discovered something really important about him and it brought us so close, like, he really opened up to me then. I appreciate that so much but… I just can’t do the same.” He glanced up at the man, hesitant. “Does it make sense?”

“Yes, it does.” Chan confirmed, a crease forming on his forehead as he took in Felix’s struggles. “So, you’re afraid that after he trusted you with something, you’re not showing that trust back?”

“Something like that, yes.” Felix slowly nodded, taken aback by Chan’s quick conclusion. He licked his lips, his shoulders hunching slightly, trying to make sense out of it, too. “It just feels like I keep lying to him while I just… There are just things I don’t want to tell him about. Not yet, at least.”

His head hung low, and he wrapped his arms around his knees, staring at the floor in shame. He felt like even now he was lying. Because he had no idea if he would ever be ready to admit to Jeongin what his life at home looked like. To be honest, he had always been planning on moving out as soon as he would finish high school and then pretending that part of his life never existed. He hadn’t even expected to end up in a relationship before that time, and now he was stuck—because even though he had no idea how to work it out, he also couldn’t see the world where they weren’t together.

“It’s okay to take your time, Lix. You don’t have to put yourself on a silver platter as soon as you start a new relationship,” Chan noted with some kind of caution but also sadness coloring his words. “Remind me, you’ve only been together for a week now, right?”

“Yeah, a week.”

“Exactly. A week is nothing. You still have plenty of time to figure things out. Just don’t be hard on yourself and take your time.” He gently placed a hand on Felix’s shoulder, a silent gesture of support. “Set boundaries if you need to. If he really cares about you, then he will understand.”

Felix took in a deep inhale, unable to resist the same worries painting his thoughts over and over again. “But doesn’t that make me a liar, Chan? When I tell him something’s okay when it’s actually not okay only because I can’t tell him the truth—isn’t it all lies?”

His voice trembled a little, as always unable to bear the heaviness of some stronger emotions. This was just how he was, breaking too fast and too easily, even when it was only caused by his own overthinking.

Chan had to think for a moment before answering, lifting his gaze to the ceiling and biting his lip. Felix observed him expectantly, curious to hear what was going through his mind. He felt grateful for being able to confide in him—the man never disregarded the problems of others, no matter how foolish they could appear.

Shaking his head gently as if answering to some part of his own internal monologue, he switched his gaze back to Felix. “No, listen. It doesn’t make you a liar.” He shifted a little to face him. “You’re just going at your own pace. You don’t owe him your whole story. This is where you set your boundaries.” He went silent for another moment, fingers scratching his chin. “But if it’s really bothering you, then maybe...” he spread his hands in a meaningless gesture, “...maybe there’s a way to find balance. I mean, be straightforward, but without breaking your own rules. If something is wrong, then admit it. And if you’re not ready to reveal what exactly is wrong, then admit that, too. It’s not wrong to ask for space sometimes.”

Felix’s gaze stayed on Chan for a moment, then shifted to the ground as he considered his words. It made sense, it really did. In fact, Felix hadn’t thought about it from this angle. All he had thought about was just how much he wasn’t ready to open up to Jeongin—and he hadn’t considered telling him just that. But maybe that was exactly the path he should choose.

“Okay,” he finally whispered, moving up to sit properly. He cast Chan a grateful smile, feeling the weight lifting off his chest. “I guess I’ll try to talk to him like this. Thanks, hyung, it really means a lot.”

“Anytime.” Chan reciprocated his smile, rubbing his shoulder encouragingly. “I’m sure you two will figure it out. You like him a lot, huh?”

A warm blush spread across his cheeks as he nodded. “Yeah. I really do,” he admitted softly.

“Good. You deserve to be happy, Lix.” He ruffled his hair despite Felix’s immediate protest, and lifted up from the floor with a light groan. “All right, I gotta go back to work. Enjoy the rest of your break, mate. And don’t think too much about it.”

Felix gave him another smile. “Thanks, hyung. Good luck there!”

“Thanks, I’m probably gonna need that,” Chan stated with a tired raise of his eyebrows, before giving him one last wave and disappearing behind the door.

Left alone, Felix grabbed his phone back and returned to his conversation with Jeongin. His chest was filled with a new kind of determination, now that he’d gained a new perspective. Also, he still had a few minutes left of his break, so he might as well use it wisely. 

my bug ❤️: you’re working until midnight again?

my bug ❤️: I wish I could pick you up :(

A smile tugged at his lips as he leaned his side against the cabinet, pulling his legs closer to his chest. Even despite his countless overthinking, it always made him happy. Jeongin’s sweet messages accompanied by the nickname Felix had set for him soon after their never-ending, heartful banter about the boy’s secret lifestyle. He knew he couldn’t really save him under a ‘spidey’ name just for the sake of secrecy, and ‘bug’ was just perfect, offensive enough for Felix to use it as a joke, too.

 my lixie 🩵: yes, until midnight

my lixie 🩵: i’d love that too, but you still need to rest, remember! are you feeling any better?

my bug ❤️: it looks much better than before, the skin is healing fast

my bug ❤️: aunt Sohee has been feeding me a lot of healthy stuff and I guess it helps a lot 

my bug ❤️: I told her I’m better now and I think I’ll return to school next week. maybe you could drop by on the weekend to finish the project? c:

Felix’s heart fluttered as he quickly typed out a response. They weren’t allowed to see each other for a whole week and he was starting to suffer from deep longing and starvation. Honestly, it was a nightmare—they had literally started their relationship with a quarantine.

my lixie 🩵: that’s wonderful! i’m glad you’re getting better <3

my lixie 🩵: i’ll come on saturday as soon as i can

my bug ❤️: can’t wait to see you ❤️

my bug ❤️: also, is there still no way you can make it to Hyunjin’s match on Friday? Aunt Sohee allowed me to go, but I want you to be there, too :(

The blond hesitated for a moment, his thumb hovering over the keyboard. Hyunjin had asked him the same thing recently, but Felix really thought of it as a lost cause—after all, it was a Friday night shift, the time when the restaurant always needed all hands on board. But maybe if he asked again…

my lixie 🩵: i’ll see what i can do. I really wanna go but idk if they’ll let me

my lixie 🩵: now i need to go back, i’ll text you later!

my bug ❤️: good luck!!

With a newfound determination, Felix hid his things in his locker and walked back to the guest area. Chan cast him a reassuring smile as soon as he saw him, immediately sparking a new idea in his head. After all, Chan had been employed there much longer than him, so he would surely know what to do. Felix wanted to slap himself, he couldn’t believe he hadn’t thought of asking him earlier.

Unfortunately, the restaurant was so busy tonight that they had their hands full of work until closing. Only then he could finally catch Chan for a talk, questions almost bursting out of his throat from all the anticipation.

“Hey, hyung. Can I ask you something?” he asked, as they were finally getting ready to leave, taking off their uniforms.

“Sure, what’s up?” Chan’s eyebrows arched curiously as he invited him to elaborate.

“So, my friend Hyunjin has this really important game on Friday, like, one of the most important of the season. And I really want to be there but I have a shift that day, and I know we’re already understaffed and all but…” He chewed on his lip, giving the boy a hopeful look. “Do you think there’s a chance they would let me swap or something?”

A crease appeared on Chan’s forehead as he turned to him in surprise. “Wait, have you tried asking on groupchat? I usually do that when I need somebody to cover.”

Felix froze, a wave of heat rushing to his cheeks. “Wait, no, I didn’t even think of that.” He let out a laugh and shook his head in disbelief. “I’m so stupid.”

Chan rolled his eyes, zipping his bag closed. “No, you’re not, don’t say that. But yeah, you should ask there, I’m sure somebody will take it.” He propped himself against one of the tables and crossed his arms over his chest, as he waited for Felix to get ready, pondering. “If nobody takes it, I’ll take it. But I hope I won’t need to. I was planning to go to that match too, you know.” A soft smile stretched on his face, causing small dimples to appear. “I was part of that team too, back in the days.”

The blond stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes wide. He suddenly remembered the jersey he had borrowed for Jeongin those few days ago. “Right, I think I saw you in some photos! I’ve never seen you at any matches, though.” He finally gathered his things and closed the locker, throwing his backpack over his shoulders.

Chan opened the door, waiting for him to leave first. “Yeah, I don’t think I stand out much. I just sit there and watch. It’s good entertainment and the current team plays really well.”

Passing through the restaurant, they bid their farewell to other waiters and the cooks who were still cleaning the kitchen. When they were passing their boss, the man staying after hours to take care of some additional tasks as usual, Felix hesitated—maybe this was another chance. He quickly asked Chan to wait for a second and ran up to the man, hopeful and determined.

The boss looked up from the stack of receipts he was organizing. “Felix? What can I do for you?”

“Sorry, boss, I have to ask one last time. Is there still no way I could skip this one shift? I will ask on the groupchat if somebody can cover it, but I just wanted to make sure…” He paused, running a hand through his hair and gave the man his best, hopeful smile. “It’s just, my friend is playing the most important game of the season and I really don’t wanna miss it.”

The man pushed his glasses up his nose and sighed. “Listen Lix, I understand, but you know we can’t afford to be down a person on Friday. Try to find a replacement first, and if it doesn’t work, then… I’ll see what I can do.”

Felix beamed and immediately bowed down to thank the man. After all, it was not a ‘no’ and it seemed like even if he couldn’t find a cover, there still was hope. “Thanks, boss, I’m sure I’ll find somebody!”

“Now go and get some rest, boys. Good job, today.”

Felix and Chan both gave a respectful bow before finally exiting the restaurant. As they stepped into the cool night, the blond’s eyes immediately scanned their surroundings, habitually searching for the familiar glimpse of red-and-blue, like he always did. Obviously, he didn’t notice anything, but his thoughts still drifted to Jeongin.

He felt his heart clench at the thought of all those nights when the boy had to bear it all alone, with nobody there to have his back, but still ready to sacrifice himself for others’ safety. Despite the awful circumstances, Felix was glad he could finally catch a break. And he was determined to be there for him from now on. Always.

“Hey, don’t worry too much, I’m sure somebody will take that shift.” Chan spoke up, probably mistaking Felix’s sudden quietness for concern over his shift swap. “You can offer to cover some other weekend, that would be a tempting exchange.”

Felix nodded, shifting his attention back to reality. “Good idea, I’ll try it. Thanks, Chan-hyung.” He kicked a loose pebble under his foot as they walked along the pavement. “So, you played on the football team, huh?”

When he looked up, he noticed a soft smile on Chan’s face, reminiscing. The streetlights cast a soft glow over their silhouettes, making his dark locks glisten. “Even better, I was the team’s captain,” he admitted, his lips stretching in a prideful grin.

Felix’s jaw dropped for a moment, then he let out a short, astonished laugh. “A captain? Wow, hyung, that’s– impressive. But why did you stop? Shouldn’t you try for a sports scholarship or something?”

Chan chuckled at his reaction, shaking his head as he tucked his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “Nah, football wasn’t really my thing. I mean, I liked to play and I loved my team, but... it’s always been music for me. So, once they accepted me into that producing program, there was no going back. But it still feels nostalgic to come and watch the games from time to time.”

When they reached their usual parting spot, Felix stood for a while, balancing from his toes to his heels. “If I manage to be there, you should join me and my friends on the bleachers. It would be fun to cheer together.”

Chan beamed at the offer. “Great idea, I’d love that. I usually go alone. And you need to show me that friend of yours on the team. I need to see my descendants in action.”

Felix’s face lit up, a wide smile spreading across his cheeks. “Deal.”

𒌐

Lessons on Friday seemed to be stretching into infinity as each class period dragged on longer than the last. This afternoon Jeongin was finally allowed to leave home and come to the match, even though he skipped classes. Felix was trying his best not to zone out but his thoughts kept drifting on and on to their approaching meeting, and he just kept staring at the clock with no single word pronounced by teachers reaching his brain. Not even his usual school chores managed to make time run faster, and when lunch break came, Felix thought he was going to absolutely lose it.

Ever since they all hung out together, lunch breaks were always spent with all of their friends—especially now, when Jeongin was stuck at home, leaving Jisung and Seungmin to themselves. But it was a good change. The two brought a new air to the group, and everyone, including Hyunjin, seemed to enjoy the new companionship. Even Felix hadn’t expected them all to click so well. In fact, school had never felt as bright as it did now—with all of them joking, exchanging funny stories and ideas, or worrying about school assignments. And even though Jeongin wasn’t there, Felix still kept him included, observing their friends with a keen eye and messaging him all the details—including the noticeable gravity between Minho and Jisung.

“You seem to like him a lot, huh?” Felix pointed out innocently, tying his shoes tighter as they were sitting on a bench, waiting for the P.E. lesson to start. He had been bearing witness to his friend growing a small crush for some time now, and it was becoming harder and harder to watch. Not to even mention how enthusiastic he was at the thought of his friend developing a relationship at the same time as him.

Minho didn’t even flinch. “Who?”

The blond rolled his eyes, a shit-eating grin spreading across his face. “Jisung, obviously. Don’t play dumb. I’ve never seen you blush around anybody else.”

Minho blinked once. Blinked twice. As for a very quick-witted individual, it was taking him longer than usual to answer—and for Felix, it was all the confirmation he needed. Besides, he already knew that Jisung liked his friend back—because of course Jeongin had slipped that little detail out while they were gossiping on a video call.

He straightened up on the bench and playfully punched Minho’s shoulder, beaming like a madman. “You actually like him, don’t you?” he chirped, excited. His gaze swept over the sports hall and immediately fell on Jisung, who was already watching them. Felix cast him a knowing smirk and the boy quickly tore his gaze away, as if caught red-handed.

Felix couldn’t believe it. He patted Minho’s arm, shaking it in excitement, and the boy didn’t have a choice but to follow his line of sight. Just then, Jisung glanced over one more time, and his cheeks immediately went crimson as he tripped over his own feet, bumping clumsily into Seungmin, who looked at him with a confused expression. Felix and Minho couldn’t help but laugh in amusement.

“Well, he definitely likes you,” Felix stated as he scratched the back of his head, feeling a pang of pity for Jisung’s flustered state. But the thought was quickly replaced by a mischievous glint in his eyes as he turned back to Minho, his leg bouncing. “He’s cute, isn’t he?”

“I guess so,” Minho grumbled dismissively, but the red flush of his cheeks gave him away.

Suddenly, a brilliant idea came to the blond’s head, making him clasp his hands in excitement. “Hey, maybe you should invite him to the Summer Party? I know from Jeongin they were all planning to go.” He leaned closer with an expectant look on his face.

There was a change in his friend’s expression, as he furrowed his eyebrows doubtfully. “Summer Party? Weren’t we all going together?” he asked.

Felix gave a small shrug. “I think it was more like a back-up plan. We’re all gonna spend it together anyway, but wouldn’t it be cute to just go with somebody officially?”

His gaze fell to the floor for a moment as a shiver ran down his spine. With June already in the air, there was only a month left until the Summer Party and one could feel it in the atmosphere around school as people were getting more and more excited, already inviting their crushes and all that. It made his heart swell, seeing that his idea actually meant something to other students.

As he was in charge of the whole event, he never considered himself going there with anyone. Not that there had even been somebody he wanted to go with—at least, not until now. Because now, as he was encouraging Minho to invite Jisung, he couldn’t help but think about himself, too. An image of him dancing with Jeongin flashed in his mind, making his stomach flutter.

“Would you be okay with that, Lix? I don’t want to leave you alone there.” Minho was still looking at him, uneven.

Felix brushed off his own thoughts and nudged Minho’s shoulder with a teasing smile. “C’mon, seeing my friends actually having fun will be better than anything. And Jisu’s already chosen songs for slow dancing. It will be worth it, I promise.”

His friend considered his words, switching his gaze between Felix’s face and the floor. Then he briefly glanced in Jisung’s direction, and Felix could swear one corner of his mouth twitched.

“Okay, maybe I’ll ask him,” he said, his voice a little softer than usual. He stood up, running a nervous hand through his hair. “Should we start the lapses already?”

After the P.E. lesson, Felix found himself obsessing over a new topic. For the whole week, aside from the usual school chores and work shifts, together with Jisu he had been busy tying up the necessary preparations for the party. They had everything ready by now—decorations, a playlist, security, and food. Every student willing to go had to confirm their participation through an internet poll in advance, where they could also vote for the ‘Most Likely To…’ poll—something that Jisu insisted on doing.

As for the music, Felix had managed to appoint Chan as the DJ for the night, to which Chan had agreed with much excitement. It made Felix happy, especially the fact that his older friend would simply be there, too. Even though they hardly ever interacted outside of work, he was still a very important person in his life, and Felix was simply grateful to know that he was willing to help him with the event he put so much heart into.

It made him even more excited knowing that Jeongin— his boyfriend —was also going to be there. His presence somehow made it even more exciting. As Felix kept rambling to him about the preparations each time they called each other, Jeongin always appeared so supportive and genuinely happy about the whole event, and that meant the world to Felix. While he already saw so many people looking forward to the party, seeing that Jeongin was also in so much favor of the idea was enough to convince him it was all going to be okay. Besides, Felix couldn’t help but also imagine them dancing and having fun together. And when he thought about all the places they could escape to for a quick kiss, he wanted to kick his feet like a school girl.

 He barely even noticed when classes were already over and he was back by his locker, stuffing his books inside. He’d said goodbye to his friends a while ago, each of them having to run some errands before they all met each other again for the football match. Felix had to take care of some errands, too—but this time surprisingly, they had nothing to do with the school council.

Jeongin had found him before they were even supposed to meet. He must have seized the perfect moment,  because as soon as Felix’s friends left and he was alone, warm hands wrapped around his waist, pulling him back into somebody’s chest.

“Hi, cookie,” Jeongin greeted.

Felix flinched at his sudden appearance, but immediately turned to face him, with butterflies flapping happily in his stomach. Meanwhile his cheeks were under the risk of turning into potatoes, because gosh —this Jeongin was really something else.

“Jeongin, hi!” he exclaimed, his voice a little breathless as he wrapped his arms around him, burying his face in the soft material of the boy’s orange T-shirt. It was a bold color, but paired with black jeans and Converse, it looked so good on him. Honestly, everything looked good on that guy.

Jeongin’s arms tightened, pulling him even closer, and Felix felt like he was going to melt into the embrace. He tilted his head up a little, and as always having to stand on his toes, he greeted the boy with a sweet kiss, thoughtful but clumsy from how wide they were both smiling.

“I missed you so much,” Jeongin admitted, placing a tender kiss on his temple.

Felix giggled, silly happiness bubbling in his stomach. “Since when did I become a ‘cookie’, huh? You were really bored at home, weren’t you?” He teased, his eyes shining with adoration.

“You have no idea.” Jeongin’s smile widened, the corners of his eyes crinkling. His hands, still resting on Felix’s waist, shifted to pull him even closer, tucking him securely against his chest. “I had to come up with something when you keep calling me a ‘bug’.”

“Yeah, because ‘bug’ makes sense. And it’s a cryptonym. I can’t use ‘Spidey’ in public,” Felix explained, swaying them both from side to side with his arms around Jeongin’s neck, as if they were already dancing.

“‘Cookie’ makes sense, too. You want me to elaborate?” Jeongin raised a teasing eyebrow.

Felix shook his head, laughing. “I don’t think it’s necessary, no.”

Then his smile faltered, his hands moving up to the boy’s face, caressing it gently. It was looking all good now, but Felix’s eyes drifted to the small red scar on Jeongin’s neck, something he assumed to be a souvenir from the fire. His fingers hovered over it as he looked into his eyes with a frown. “How are you feeling now?”

Jeongin noticed the change in his voice, and tilted his head with an endearned smile. “Right now, I’m feeling perfect, thanks.”

Felix sighed and cast him a meaningful look, not giving in. “I’m serious, Ayen. Are you all right?”

The brunette’s expression softened. He gave him another kiss, this time on the cheek. “Don’t worry Lix, I’m okay. I’ve been sitting on my butt all week, like I promised. A scar will be there, but soon I’ll be just as good as new.”

One of his hands reached up to caress his cheek and Felix needed to focus so as not to melt into the touch. It was surprising how easy it was for Jeongin to sweep him off his feet. But oh, how did Felix love that feeling, of being cared for so much. No matter how pathetic it made him look.

“I’m glad. I missed you,” he admitted, leaning into Jeongin’s chest for another hug.

“I’m sorry I left you for so long. Honestly, it was a nightmare. It’s not how I imagined a start of a relationship,” Jeongin murmured, nuzzling his nose in the blond locks.

Felix remained silent for a moment, simply enjoying the feeling of being held. He shifted slightly, pressing his cheek against Jeongin’s chest and exhaling slowly. Even with their constant texting, he had been worrying sick, and most of all, he had been craving for his touch. Nobody had ever touched him with so much tenderness, and Felix just couldn’t get enough.

“So, you managed to find somebody for your shift?” Jeongin asked, his hands finally releasing Felix’s waist as he watched him turn to close his locker. Their fingers laced together as soon as he was done.

Felix gave a small nod, adjusting the bag on his shoulder. As they were supposed to come back to school for the match, he’d already stuffed his backpack in the locker, exchanging it for a tote bag instead. “Yeah, Nayeon-noona said we can switch, so I’m working next week instead.”

A pang of worry flickered across Jeongin’s expression but soon after he bestowed Felix with another sweet smile. “Good, I couldn’t imagine going to the match without you.” He gave Felix’s hand a gentle squeeze. “Wanna grab some food before it starts?”

Soon after, they were back at their spot by the lake, with birds chirping above their heads and the sun warming their skin. They had held hands the entire way, exchanging kisses from time to time and sharing stories from their week. On the way, they had ordered takeout from a nearby street food stand, and now, with their stomachs full and satisfied, they finally settled down on the grass, surrounded by many other people who also came there for a picnic.

Felix felt all the weight coming off his shoulders as he just lay there with his head on Jeongin’s lap, enjoying the way his fingers were running through his hair. He could barely remember the last time he’d been able to chill out like that, with no more errands to run and not many worries on his mind. He couldn’t say there were no worries, because most of the time something was always going on in his head—but at least right now, it all didn’t hold that much significance.

“Can I ask you something?” Felix asked, breaking the comfortable silence they had fallen into.

They had already discussed so many matters, with conversation flowing easily between different topics and moments of peaceful quiet. It was so comfortable that Felix could feel his skin tingling. At some point, they had even started a debate over the best starships in Star Wars, and Felix could swear it was one of the most engaging discussions he had ever participated in.

However, his mind still kept coming back to the previous week afternoon, when he had found that boy spread unconscious on bathroom tiles, bleeding and covered in sweat and smoke. Even though by that time he had already figured out that Jeongin was Spider-Man, the sight of him still had managed to shatter something in his heart.

He remembered that wound so well. A long, thin gash, straight and neat like a surgical cut deep into his skin, the one he assumed to be from the bullet, seemingly stitched but now ripped open again, with pus and blood slowly dripping. And then the skin around it, undoubtedly a courtesy of the fire, covered with blisters and moist, shiny and mottled, almost black in some spots.

Bile had gathered in his throat at the sight and his first reflex had been to throw up, causing him to switch his gaze higher. That was when his eyes fell on his face, then still covered with a mask. After a moment of hesitation, with his heart hammering in his chest, his fingers had reached up to his face and gently peeled away the material. And there he was, the person he had already been expecting to see, with a mixture of smoke, sweat, and dirt covering his face all over, then some minor barely visible cuts and burn marks here and there, where sparks must have touched.

It had been his face that finally pushed him into action, to take care of him the best he could, with tears dripping down his face as he desperately searched through the useless instructions placed in the first-aid kit, then through the internet to figure out how to help him. The moment he was done and the boy was still unconscious, he had felt so useless, so powerless. His thoughts had drifted into dangerous places, filling him with worries and providing more and more doubts that he couldn’t comprehend. And it all led to that one question— why .

“Sure, go ahead,” Jeongin replied, his fingers still running through Felix’s hair. From time to time, they would wander behind Felix’s ears, brushing the sensitive skin and causing him to close his eyes in bliss.

“How did it happen that you became a hero?” he asked, turning his head a little to look at Jeongin properly.

Jeongin’s hand faltered in Felix’s hair. He looked surprised at the question, his forehead creasing a little, but Felix just waited patiently.

“Hmm,” he began unevenly, eyes dropping to the grass, wondering where to start. His hand stopped stroking Felix’s hair, now simply cupping his chin. “Do you remember that science tournament in second class? It was first held in our school, then the team was sent for finals in Seoul.”

Felix squeezed his eyes, trying to remember. “It was the first semester, right?”

Jeongin nodded his head, the movement causing his earring to dangle and reflect the sunlight. “Yeah, at the end of it. So, after that we were invited to visit the laboratories in JYP Industries. I’m still not sure how it happened but from what I’ve figured through my research, it was some radioactive spider. That’s where I got the idea for the webs and my suit.”

“A radioactive spider?” the blond inquired, trying to grasp his head around the idea.

Jeongin let out a weak chuckle, his fingers finally moving again through the blond strands, “I know how it sounds, yeah. I barely understand it myself. Not sure if that company even understands what those spiders are capable of.” He hesitated, and his voice dropped to a near whisper when he spoke again. “Sometimes I’m thinking… it’s fortunate I don’t live in Seoul. Just imagine, if Spider-Man appeared there out of nowhere… they would’ve surely put two and two together. But Busan is far enough for them not to make any connections.”

Felix observed his face, noticing every crease on his skin, the lack of usual light in his eyes—as if somebody switched it off. He slowly took in Jeongin’s words, theories and assumptions passing through his brain like a storm. 

He tried to connect the dots.

A radioactive spider, a tech company. 

‘ far enough for them not to make any connections’

‘would’ve surely put two and two together’

Suddenly, something clenched in his gut. He felt a need to sit straight up, leaving the comfort of Jeongin’s lap and searching his face with a worried look instead.  “You think they would try to use you for their experiments?”

“This or something else. Lock me away from the world, put me in the lab.” Jeongin let out a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair. “After it bit me, my body changed. It was as if somebody put something in me to make me better, like an update you only see in movies. It’s not normal for a person. I can do things that…” he furrowed his eyebrows a little, shaking his head. “I just know, if people knew what I’m actually capable of, they would be scared . A person shouldn’t be allowed to be like I am. It’s not normal, it’s crazy. I’m not normal.” 

“Like an anomaly,” Felix whispered, caught in a trance.

“Exactly.” The boy shifted his gaze shyly between the ground to Felix’s face, somewhat hesitant. “That’s why I didn’t want you to know. Nobody to know.”

Felix briefly lowered his gaze, feeling the gears of his brain turning. “But if people shouldn’t know about it… Why do you still do what you do? I mean, what if somebody actually decides to hurt you?”

Jeongin’s sad gaze was already enough of an answer. “I have to, Felix. If a person is bestowed with something like this, how can they just sit around and not use it for others?”

They sat for a moment in silence but it seemed like Jeongin was already opening up so much that he couldn’t stop. He involuntarily moved even closer to Felix, they both leaning so much into each other’s space and speaking so quietly that only they could hear their own voices. So close as if nobody else besides them existed.

Jeongin now grabbed Felix’s hand, playing with the silver rings adoring his fingers. And Felix allowed him, keeping his eyes still on his face, focused on every single change in his expression.

“The first week after I got bitten, I was so overwhelmed. I couldn’t stay home, I was walking everywhere and nowhere. I was so confused, I couldn’t stop thinking. I was hearing so many things, I could feel things happening. I became obsessed with running, it was the only thing that could keep me sane. That evening I was going back home, it was late and dark already. And then I heard that woman in the alley, and then a man so close to her… There were people somewhere around but nobody reacted, I’m not sure if they could even hear, if they could notice. But I was able to. So I did.” He took a deep breath in, his back straightening slightly as he gave Felix a sincere look. “I guess it was then when I realized that if I can feel something bad  happening and then get there before anyone else can… Then it’s my duty to do it.”

Felix was left speechless. He moved his hand up to the boy’s nape, bringing their foreheads together. He wasn’t sure what he was thinking, what he was supposed to think. Did even proper words exist for something like this? In the world of so much violence and hate, there Jeongin was, bestowed with a gift and using it to help others. Sacrificing himself for others. Risking his own life for others. Just like that.

Only now Felix was finally realizing what he had brought himself into. He had already cried over his unconscious body, already seen the damage Spider-Man’s actions lead to. The wounds, the suffering. The loneliness. The question was how far Jeongin was ready to go for the sake of fulfilling his duty. For the sake of doing what nobody else was able to do.

And Felix was afraid that he already knew the answer.

“Can you promise me one thing, Innie?” he asked, pulling back to see the boy’s face. It was so pretty but also so confused, eyes shining with doubt, maybe with slight fear. But Felix really needed to say that, and to hear his response. He needed to draw a line, because he knew already that Jeongin would never find one himself.

He tilted his head, opening his eyes a bit wider, gaze locked with Jeongin’s. “Promise me you will always come back to me. Whatever you do, promise me you will come back. From anything.”

A look of shock crossed Jeongin’s face, the question visibly catching him off-guard.  “I– I don’t–”

Felix didn’t want to hear that. His heart hammered against his ribs as he grasped his face, pulling him closer, staring into his eyes with determination. “Promise me,” he insisted.

He knew he was crossing a line. Demanding something impossible, maybe breaking the rules his boyfriend had set for himself a long time ago. But he was also convinced that whatever Jeongin believed in, it didn’t take much concern for his own safety. So while his duty was to care for others, Felix’s duty was to care for him from now on. Doing what nobody else was able to do. Because nobody else knew. Nobody but him.

Jeongin shook his head. “Felix, I can’t promise you that, I–”

“You have to. I can’t be with you if you don’t,” Felix blurted out, persistent.

He knew it was wrong, he knew he was backing Jeongin into a corner, that what he was doing was emotional blackmail. But this was the only way he could prevent Jeongin from crossing the line between safety and duty. And for some reason, he was convinced that Jeongin wouldn’t be able to refuse.

“I like you so much, Felix,” Jeongin admitted, his voice breaking.

“I know,” Felix brushed his hair behind his ear. “I just need you to remember that… that you can’t save anyone if you don’t protect yourself first.”

Wind blew into their faces for the moment Jeongin needed to digest his words. And Felix just observed him, waiting and wondering if whatever he had already said actually made sense. But it was all new to him, too. And while he knew his demand was much, it was the only way he could make sure Jeongin was safe.

“Listen, I’m not asking you to quit. I’m asking you to come back when it gets too dangerous. Whatever happens, you have to stop when it gets too intense.” His hands slid down to the boy’s neck, finally falling down to grasp his hands. He interlaced their fingers, holding on tight. “Can you promise me just that? Can you promise you will come back when it gets too dangerous?” He tilted his head, giving him a pleading look.

Jeongin just stared at their palms, conflicted. “I– I will try.” A heavy sigh escaped him as he squeezed his eyes for a moment. “I’m sorry I brought you into this Felix, I hate to see you worry. I know you already have it hard enough,” he noted, lifting his fingers to stroke Felix’s cheeks.

Felix covered his hand with his own palm.  “I’m fine, Innie. I’ve been worried about you but now you’re getting better, so that’s enough,” he said, tilting his head and smiling sweetly.

But something shifted in his gut, knowing where the conversation was now about to go. Where it always went, because Jeongin cared too much not to notice. 

“But you’ve been working so hard this week, too. How long did you sleep today?” Jeongin asked, his thumb moving across the skin under Felix’s eye.

“Long enough.” Felix smiled, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. 

He knew it was unfair of him to react like that, but it wasn’t something he could control, not really. It was like a coping mechanism, a defense reaction. A sudden grip on his gut, a push that urged him to back off and hide. It always happened when the frontiers of the territory he was trying so hard to conceal and protect were at the risk of violation. Instantly causing him to grow distant and alert.

He leaned in, stealing a kiss from the boy’s lips. A distraction. A cute gesture behind which crept an obnoxious shiver that only he could feel.

“You’re cute when you worry,” he added, hoping for a blush.

Jeongin reciprocated the kiss but kept it short and sweet, quickly moving away to bestow him with a cracked smile, encouraging to open up. “I’m just worried about you, too. You told me to keep my duties in check but it seems like you’re working hard, too. You always stay up for so long, hardly ever at home. You need rest, too.”

Felix shrugged and prompted himself on his hand nonchalantly, moving even closer. “C’mon, we all stay up long, it’s what teenagers do. Why would I go to sleep when I can text you?” There it was, a cute smile, shifting the subject again.

Nuzzling his nose across Jeongin’s cheek, he pressed another quick kiss, this time to his jaw. Jeongin tilted his head back a little, offering him access, although his voice remained serious. As if he himself was conflicted between feeling and thinking.

He shook his head a little, denying. “We kept talking because you still weren’t back home, baby,” he argued, but his breath hitched under the influence of Felix’s touch.

“So what? You stay up late at night, too.” Felix was getting annoyed, but kept nibbling at his skin, searching for a soft spot. Something that would shut him up already.

Jeongin’s hand hovered over his waist, as if unsure of its next move. “You know I don’t need that much sleep.”

Felix scoffed a laugh into his skin, turning it into a joke. “Mhm sure thing I know, Mr. Spider,” he hummed into his neck, then leaned back for a moment, giving the boy his best, best look. “What else is there that you don’t need, huh?” He offered a cute, innocent smile, before kissing him again.

 His gut was clenching at his own actions but there was no turning back. As much as he hated whatever he was doing, he hated revealing the truth even more. And Jeongin always turning back to that subject was not helping.

“Felix–” Jeongin wanted to protest, but Felix caught his lips with his own, moving hungrily as if he wanted to devour, not allowing the boy to even catch a breath. Making sure he would say nothing more. He was so sick of all those words already. They had talked enough.

Jeongin was surprised at first, but as Felix crawled closer, imposing himself into his lap, his hands finally moved, resting around his waist. He could barely keep up with the pace, but Felix didn’t care much, feeling a need to overwhelm his space as much as he could. He deepened the kiss with a desperate pressure, moving closer and closer, pushing at Jeongin until he fell onto the grass, unable to escape, his head locked between Felix’s hands.

He didn’t care about other people at the park, didn’t care if somebody was watching, if somebody was judging them for such a bold display of affection. He crawled on top of him, taking control completely, taking advantage of the poor boy’s weakness for his kisses. He knew Jeongin enjoyed that—enjoyed him —too much to resist, and Felix enjoyed it too, now more than willing to use it for his own benefit. Anything to stop Jeongin from digging where he wasn’t allowed to.

Maybe Felix was just going crazy from all of this. From Jeongin being so supportive and kind, so full of love and sacrifice. All those virtues Felix could barely find in himself, filled with insecurities and unable to at least be truthful while Jeongin confided in him everything he could. Demanding impossible promises while he himself was a walking lie, unable to share his own truth. It made him angry, it made him sad, it made his stomach curl painfully. But there was no way he could tell the real reason why he always came back home as late as he could, why he always kept himself busy, finding more and more activities to fill his days. Anything that would help him get out of his hell hole.

So he just pressed more and more, suffocating not only Jeongin’s words, but his own thoughts, too. Turning it wet and dirty, never letting go of his lips but allowing his hands to roam freely, to travel from his shoulders down to his chest, to slip under the brunette’s shirt for even more funsies. He could feel Jeongin’s hesitation, but there was some willingness too, caught in too much adoration to refuse the blissful feeling just for the sake of the sanity of them both.

More than aware of that, Felix just kept pushing, playing to the satisfaction of them both—but more than all, of himself.

Like the selfish brat he was.

Chapter Text

Jeongin couldn’t breathe — both physically and metaphorically.

All the air was stolen from his lungs the moment Felix’s body forced him to the ground, overwhelming his space and all his senses. Everything he could feel was the warmth of his body pressing him down, then the shivers caused by the small hands exploring, putting every single cell of his body aflame. And finally his lips, stealing from him everything they could, including his oxygen, words, and sanity.

Jeongin had never been kissed like this before and maybe that was the reason why his whole body went slack, disarming him completely. His head was hazy, overwhelmed with the closeness and the touch, with the way Felix’s scent and warmth were engulfing every part of him. His lips could barely keep up with the pace he was setting, desperately chasing every movement but still failing to gain even the faintest illusion of control. He was completely at the blond’s mercy.

Only after a moment did his mind snap back to reality and start beating the alarm, reminding him how wrong everything about this kiss was.

He wanted to protest but it was impossible with every word being immediately quelled by Felix’s lips, turning every sound into an incomprehensible mumble. With his speech muffled, he turned to his hands, searching for a way to find a grip, to turn the tides. He tried to push himself back up but Felix noticed the movement immediately, tugging at his hair and buckling his hips where he was straddling him, fighting to keep him down.

Frustrated, Jeongin gripped the boy’s body and finally managed to flip them both over with a forceful push, ending with him landing on top of Felix. He hovered there for a moment, trying to steady his breath—and staring at the boy lying under him, his eyes wide, lips swollen and glistening, cheeks flushed pink. Jeongin squeezed his eyes shut and finally stumbled to the side, turning to sit back on the grass.

“I– We should stop,” he breathed out, occupying his hands with wiping dirt off his pants. He stared down firmly, refusing to look at the boy.

Silence stretched between them, hovering like an imminent thunderstorm. There was another warm blow of wind brushing Jeongin’s skin and ruffling his hair, causing him to close his eyes with a heavy sigh. The world around him was slowly regaining its usual shapes—the voices of other people around them, the usual noise of the city, the pleasant nature of their surroundings.

God, he was just so confused. One moment they were having such a vulnerable moment, with him sharing another piece of his story with Felix. So meaningful and relieving, like a breath of fresh air after choking with smoke. And then, when he wanted to reciprocate that feeling, to offer Felix the same chance of not bearing all his burdens alone anymore–—he was met with a brick wall.

Jeongin had already expected Felix to inquire about his Spider-Man life sooner or later, and his heart just swelled at all the understanding and kindness he’d received. He felt like he could really trust him, and he had been keeping everything just for himself for too long not to give in. Nobody had ever looked at him with this kind of worry and willingness to understand. Jeongin knew it must be hard to comprehend his motives—he barely even understood them himself, he just knew them—but it seemed like Felix was trying nonetheless, and it was just enough to make his heart race.

But in all this, he wanted Felix to experience that kind of trust and support, too. He wanted to be there for that boy, just like he was there for him. He wanted to know what was going on in that boy’s head, he wanted to learn more and more about him, to discover and share every single joy and issue of his life. But Felix wasn’t allowing him. Over and over again, whenever Jeongin asked, all he was met with was a repulsion.

“Jeongin, I’m sorry.”

Felix’s voice was hoarse and at the verge of breaking when he finally snapped out of his trance, now hesitantly scooting closer. He gently reached out for his hands and that was enough for Jeongin to turn back to him, no matter how heavy the weight on his chest was.

He offered him the grasp, resulting in the blond immediately moving as close as possible, now attaching his side to Jeongin’s, shy and ashamed but still seeking comfort in his presence. They sat just like that and for a casual passerby their image would look like nothing else than a cute meeting of two high school sweethearts, basking in the sun and enjoying a pleasurable afternoon after school. Only upon a closer look one could see that something was wrong. And what nobody could see was the heart hammering in Jeongin’s chest, as he was trying to put everything into one piece.

He ran a hand through his dark hair as if that could help at soothing the storm in his mind. It was hard to understand what had just happened, but it all felt like running through a crashing building, with the ceiling falling over his head. And yet, it was just as usual—that loop of Felix, Felix, Felix . Felix lying with his head in his lap as they had talked about everything and nothing. Felix being there for him once again, allowing him to open up about the part of his life nobody had ever heard about before, Felix demanding, begging for his safety. And then, in the end—his cute, lovely Felix turning mad as he pushed him down to the ground, trying to bury any attempt of Jeongin showing the same concern for him.

Jeongin didn’t know what he was supposed to feel. His first reaction was surprise, a hint of anger even. Confusion, as his body didn’t know whether to follow prudence or desire. A silent fight finally won by the simple will to take care of the boy, stronger than anything else.

With his heartbeat finally slowing down, he stole a glance at the boy by his side. After the weak attempt of apology which was met with no words from Jeongin’s part, the blond was now staring firmly at the grass, his features distorted in sorrow. He looked so small now, as if curling into himself. As if he would disappear if only he could. 

“You– you can’t shut me up like that, Lix,” Jeongin finally spoke, the words hardly passing through his dry throat. 

It was so hard to find the right words at that moment, each one of them feeling like a piece of glass laying on his tongue. Like walking on thin ice and already hearing the cracks.

He inhaled shakily before forcing himself to continue. “I’m worried about you and I just can’t– I’m sorry if I ask too much but I can’t ignore it when you– when it’s clear you’re not okay.”

When he looked down, Felix’s lower lip was quivering, and his eyes were so brimming with tears that they looked like they might spill over at any moment. The discovery was like a truck hitting Jeongin’s body, but still not enough for him to move. He couldn’t, not now. Not when Felix was on the edge and Jeongin at risk of pushing him down into the void.

His body convulsed with a suppressed sob, the boy finally moving as he hid his face in his palms. Jeongin could hear his breathing becoming heavier and heavier but he remained in his place, giving him space but also not pulling away even an inch. It was not the time to impose his space, not after he himself had used touch as a tool. He needed Felix to turn to him when he was sure about it, and not under emotions for yet another time.

“I’m sorry, I’m just a fucking idiot,” Felix mumbled through sobs, his voice wet and hoarse. He shook his head with a frustrated sigh, then pressed his hands against his face, dragging them down his skin in a forceful movement. Smearing the tears all over as they slowly dripped from his eyes.

With his eyebrows furrowing, Jeongin reached into his pocket for tissues, gently handing him one. The boy took it gratefully and began wiping his face, although he still sniffled and trembled.

“I don’t know why I did that, I shouldn’t have done that,” he mumbled once again with a shaky breath, fighting to regain control over his emotions as he wiped the tears from his eyes. It seemed like he was almost getting better when the tears then leaped again, causing him to lean in and hide his face in his palms, pressing them over his eyes almost aggressively. “I’m sorry, I don’t know–” he hiccuped, “I don’t know what I’m doing.” 

“It’s okay,” Jeongin murmured, his hand finally finding its way to the boy’s back, rubbing it reassuringly. “Don’t worry about it now, okay? Let’s take a deep breath.”

Taking a grasp of his small hands, he gently made Felix look at him, guiding him through slow inhales and exhales, maintaining a gentle eye contact through every one of them. It seemed to be working, with Felix’s breath finally slowing down and adjusting. As his crying passed, Jeongin reached his hand out to brush his hair from his forehead, each movement aligning with his breathing. He tugged loose strands behind his ear, caressing the skin behind it gently, waiting for him to find comfort in his touch.

“It must have been a long day, hmm?” he asked in a calm voice, careful as if talking to a toddler. “Do you want to talk about it?”

No matter what Felix was going to say, Jeongin already knew there was something going on. It wouldn’t be normal for anybody to act like that, to react in such a way to a simple act of care. As a person who bore his own secrets too, it was easy for Jeongin to recognize that—the way he recoiled and attacked like a sick animal fighting to protect whatever was left of him. And that was what concerned him the most, because such behavior was not normal at all. It wasn’t just about protecting the truth—it was like pleading for survival.

Felix sniffled once more, his breath still a bit shaky as he looked at him with shimmering eyes. “Can– Can we hug?”

It took Jeongin a blink to answer, a little taken aback but quickly composing himself.

“Yes. Yes, of course,” he said, already wrapping his arms around the blond’s waist, allowing him to fall into his chest. He rested his chin on top of Felix’s head, pulling him close and rubbing his back in a soothing motion.

“Are you mad at me?” Felix asked, his voice muffled by Jeongin’s shirt. He nuzzled his cheek against the material, and Jeongin was glad to notice his body relax, to see the boy finally giving in, allowing him to help, even if just a little bit.

“No, not at all,” Jeongin denied, burrowing his own face in Felix’s hair. He took in the faint smell of his shampoo mixed with the natural scent of his body, then pressed a kiss against his temple as he kept rubbing his shoulders. “But please, whenever you’re feeling tired, or sad, or angry... Don’t hesitate to tell me about it, okay? So that I can just... kiss it away. But maybe not like we did now,” he joked, trying to ease the atmosphere.

Felix shut his eyes close, embracing Jeongin’s torso with his hands, his moves careful not to touch the wound on his ribs—as it was much better now, but still there. “I’m sorry I acted like that. I just don’t like talking about it. I know you’re worried about me having shifts so late but it’s not something I can change.”

“I know, baby,” Jeongin cooed as his heart swelled, happy to hear the boy finally opening up. His comfort was the only thing that mattered to him right now, and whatever he was willing to share with him, it was just enough. “I just want you to rest properly, okay? Whenever you’re able to do it, of course.” 

“I– I’ll try,” the boy hummed, although the tone of his voice wasn’t very convincing.

Jeongin didn’t let it show but he had a really strong feeling that something was wrong, and whatever it was, it must have been going on behind the scenes for a while. It showed through the circles around the boy’s eyes, the pimples on his face, the paleness of his skin. The way he was always doing something, whether it was work, the school council, meeting his friends or simply catching up with assignments—it seemed like he was always somewhere but never at home, never having a moment to sit down and rest. And it just messed with Jeongin’s mind because he simply hated to see him always so drained and perturbed about something.

“Maybe sleep in before you come tomorrow, hmm? Just text me when you’ve rested enough and then we’ll do the project,” he suggested, convinced that baby steps were the best way to address the matter.

Felix took a deep breath before giving a small nod. ​“I’ll rest, I promise,” he mumbled, slightly closing his eyes and nuzzling his face even deeper into the fabric of his shirt.

His breathing was finally calm and steady. A few more gentle breaths passed before he shifted, settling more comfortably between Jeongin’s legs, his back now pressed against his chest. “I’m happy we’re here now,” he admitted in a soft voice, his fingertips moving across the skin of Jeongin’s forearm, caressing it gently.

Jeongin pulled him closer to his chest, brushing his cheek against the blond hair. “Me too. I really missed you this week.”

​“I missed you, too. So much,” Felix replied with a gentle sigh. “But you’re going back to school next week, right?”

“Yes, for sure.” Jeongin replied, his fingers playing gently with Felix’s when their hands met on his lap. “We can start preparing for CSAT then.”

Felix gave a small frown, his fingers opening and closing, following his movement. “Are you sure? I really don’t want to hold you back.”

Jeongin chuckled, burying his face in the crook of Felix’s neck. “Babe, I told you already, you don’t hold me back,” he said, his voice muffled against Felix’s skin as he brushed his nose against it. “It’s good to revise things. Besides, what could be better than spending time with you, hmm?” He added, planting a feather-like kiss on his neck.

A gentle shiver passed through Felix’s body but he didn’t make any movement besides that. “And how about saving the world? Are you going back to it, too?” he asked in a voice even softer than before.

“When I’m able to, yes.” Jeongin replied sincerely, sincerity being the only language he wished was used between him and Felix now. “But I’ll tell you when I do, okay?”

“Okay.” 

As they sat there in silence, taking each the warmth of their embrace, the atmosphere was turning pleasant again. The sounds of birds chirping above their heads, the sun reflecting beautifully in the waters of the lake. As the golden hour came closer, the scenery was even more lovely than it had been before, much warmer, much more romantic. Jeongin felt like he could stay there forever.

“I like it when we kiss,” Felix admitted after a moment, his full body weight now resting on Jeongin. He let himself be held and swayed, picking a blade of grass to play with. “And I’m sorry if I overstepped, I know it was wrong how I used it against you, I shouldn’t have pushed you like that.”

Jeongin closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose, placing his forehead against the boy’s temple. The memory of Felix straddling and kissing him mad flashed through his mind like a blaze, and despite setting his skin aflame, it also caused his head to ache. Because no matter the circumstances, he’d still enjoyed that kiss, maybe even more than he should have. It was only the fact that he cared more for Felix than for himself that had kept his thoughts sane.

“It’s okay,” he replied breathlessly, his gaze following the way the boy’s hands played with the grass. “But please, next time don’t do it just to shut me up. If you don’t want to talk about something, just tell me.”

“I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.” Felix squeezed his eyes shut, letting out an embarrassed exhale. Then he tilted his head back, resting it against Jeongin’s shoulder. “But in general, do you think we… kiss too much? If you’re uncomfortable, then…”

“No, no, I’m not uncomfortable,” Jeongin denied, although the question immediately spun a new wave of doubts in his head.

Because when he thought about it, the amount of kisses and affection they had exchanged after barely a week of dating was… Well, Jeongin didn’t want to call it concerning, because to him it felt only natural to kiss the boy. After all, it’s not like they were kids, they were almost adults, supposed to finish high school and start university in less than a year. Still, when Felix asked that question, his brain filled with a new portion of doubts, as now he wasn’t sure if Felix felt comfortable about it, too. Once again, it was hard to tell—as it had been yet another time when he had kissed him in the heat of the moment.

“Are you uncomfortable, though?” Jeongin suddenly asked, leaning forward just a little bit to peek his head from behind him, observing his expression with concern.

He looked so cute in his arms now, with the sun leaving a pretty glow on his blond strands, his skin gold and bright, even though the traces of the previous tears were still visible. Jeongin held and swayed him with pleasure, feeling the happiest he had ever been. It was so different now than it had been before, he realized—back when Felix had been just a crush for him, an unreachable gem to appreciate. But now he was his everything, the simplest and the best pleasure in his little life. Was it okay to be so down bad for somebody like this, after such a short time? Jeongin didn’t know. But at the same time, he didn’t even think much about it—he just allowed himself to feel .

And he couldn’t help but hope for Felix to ever feel the same way about him, too.

When Felix looked up, that pretty smile of his was back attached to his lips, his eyes glimmering with a hint of amusement. “I told you I like it. I like you. I’ve never–” a rosy blush flooded his cheeks as he hesitated, “I’ve never felt this comfortable around anybody.”

Then he lifted his palm to Jeongin’s face, tracing the curve of his lower lip ever so delicately, his gaze dropping there, too. Jeongin’s heart accelerated at that simple movement, and he remained still under his touch, finding himself in a trance as he kept his eyes on the freckled face, so close to him now.

“​I feel the same way,” he whispered, his voice barely audible. “More than you know.”

Felix stared at him almost expectantly, his mouth opening ever so slightly only to close again the next second. Then he shifted, his body remaining a heavy, comfortable weight with his back pressed against Jeongin’s chest, although there was just a slight change visible as he tilted his head to the side, his fingertips tracing patterns across Jeongin’s forearms.

“You can kiss me whenever you want,” he spoke, his voice hoarse and hesitant. “I like when you do it.”

There was something in the way he said that, something in the way he turned his gaze away from him and didn’t take any action, as if waiting for Jeongin to move. The brunette felt a shiver running down his skin, his heart skipping a beat once again, wondering if he was reading his boyfriend correctly.

He gulped, moving his head away from the boy as he leaned forward, swaying his body to the side just to look at him, to confirm whether his assumptions were true. “Should I– Do you want me to…”

“Mhm.” Felix nodded ever so slightly, his eyes gently blinking, casting a shy glance. His face looked so pure at the moment, with that rosy blush spreading under his freckles all over, that it made Jeongin’s heart flip flops.

Feeling a storm of emotions flurrying in his stomach, ​he leaned into his neck and pressed a gentle kiss to the skin. He hesitated for a moment, waiting for a reaction, and when Felix tilted his head to the side even more, exposing his neck with a satisfied sigh, Jeongin smiled and leaned in back again.

He traced an invisible pattern, leaving small pecks one after another and enjoying the way Felix melted in his arms, tilting his head and leaning back into him even more to give him access. Jeongin really enjoyed the difference in their bodies, the way he could just hold the boy like that in his arms and make sure nothing could harm him. He kissed his neck all the way up, then across his jaw, then behind his ear, and his heart was at the risk of erupting from the contented hums Felix was letting out.

The sight of him so delighted made his heart swell and he felt like he could do this forever. He allowed his lips to move a bit more, elevating the pressure on Felix’s skin as it returned to his neck again, allowing his tongue and teeth to put in some work, too. A hand clutched on his forearm as Felix squirmed where he was sitting, letting out a surprised gasp. 

“Oh, fuck,” he mumbled, barely audible, and Jeongin felt his chest fill with pride and jittery, a sudden boldness pumping in his veins.

“You like that?” he mumbled against his skin, fighting a grin. Every inch of his skin where their bodies touched was aflame.

“M‐hm, yeah,” Felix breathed out weakly, his body arching up from the ground to lean more into his touch. Jeongin felt like he was entering heaven.

As he kissed him more, not giving a damn in the world about anyone in the park caring about them, suddenly a phone vibrated in Felix’s pocket. The boy let out a frustrated sigh and reached to take it out, while Jeongin lifted his head just enough to look at him, ​a soft chuckle rumbling in his chest at the sight. His eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed and rosy, the lips parted slightly from heavy breaths.

So Jeongin leaned back into his neck, nibbling and kissing, not even sparing a glance at the phone despite the perfect view he had at it from behind him. In fact, he couldn’t care less about whoever wanted to interrupt them.

“​It’s Minho. He asks when we’ll be arriving,” Felix breathed out, not even bothering to type out a response.

“What a pity,” Jeongin murmured, the kisses now moving along Felix’s jaw. “How much are we in a hurry?”

 ​"We need... ah... we need to get going if we want to... uhh, get ice-cream on the way,” Felix replied weakly, although it didn’t seem like he was going anywhere.

Jeongin just hummed and kissed him some more, moving slowly until their lips finally met. It seemed to finally wake Felix up as he reciprocated the kiss, putting one hand on Jeongin’s cheek, the other feeling himself melting in his touch. He pulled back only after a moment, bestowing him with a soft smile and glimmering eyes.

“C’mon we need to get going,” he giggled, moving his thumb across Jeongin’s cheeks.

“But you wanted to kiss.” Jeongin offered him a pout, leaning in with a pleading gaze, teasing him. He just loved to see that boy smile.

Felix of course couldn’t hold his amused laughter, now shaking his head in denial. “Don’t pout, I’ll kiss you later. Unless you don’t want ice-cream?”

Jeongin sighed, finally pulling away. “Fine, let’s go. But you’re really cute, you know?” He teased him again as he scrambled to his feet, then helped the boy up from the grass.

Felix gratefully grasped his hands, his cheeks all rosy and adorned with that shy smile, beaming from giggles. It was so cute that Jeongin tucked him even closer to his chest when they stood up, making the boy sway from fluster. Jeongin found out that while he loved Felix staying safe in his arms, he loved seeing him blushing and laughing just as much.

“You’re really enjoying yourself, huh?” The smaller boy asked, wrapping his hands around Jeongin’s neck now, biting his lip.

“You have no idea,” Jeongin chuckled, tilting his head with an adoring smile.

“God, you’re so cute,” Felix whined, and then he was the one to initiate their next kiss, leaning straight for Jeongin’s lips. It was just as sweet as the one they had shared back at school today, the sweetest of them all.

And perfect for them to finally pull back, both of them giggling, their cheeks red and eyes crinkling. Their hands clasped back together, and adjusting the bag on his shoulder, Felix cast him another cute, shy smile, so full of light that Jeongin felt warm.

Instead of grabbing ice-cream from 7-Eleven again, this time they settled for the ice-cream parlor nearby that Jeongin had found out of boredom during his week off (in fact, he had been searching for cute date ideas in Busan but he wasn’t going to admit it out loud). Butterflies fluttered in Jeongin’s stomach for their whole walk there, as they swung their hands and debated about the outcome of the upcoming match.

In the meantime, he also found himself escaping to the past events of the day. More than all, he was extremely happy—every kiss and every sensation kept replying in his mind over and over again, like a dream caught on a CD. The memories made him glance at Felix from time to time so fondly that the boy would raise his eyebrow at him and ask, receiving a sweet ‘nothing’ in response followed by a kiss on his nose or cheek.

Besides that, there was also a huge sense of relief, too. Even though it didn’t seem like Felix was going to open up soon about whatever was troubling his mind, they still had managed to resolve the issue at hand. Jeongin was grateful for the talk they had, for the promise that Felix would tell him whenever he was feeling down. For him it was enough, because it didn’t matter to him what the reason for it was until Felix decided it was worth sharing. He just wanted the boy to be honest and allow him the simple knowledge of what he was feeling.

When they arrived at the ice cream parlor, Felix was the one to pay for them, giggling at his boyfriend’s protests and then receiving a kiss and a promise of being paid for the next time. After a short debate, they settled for two scoops, with Jeongin taking pistachio and tiramisu, and Felix choosing two of the most unusual flavors on offer, something with minions and smurfs in the name, causing Jeongin to mock him and grimace playfully after having a taste—receiving a smack on his arm and a cute laugh, with Felix threatening that he would never treat him to ice-cream again.

“Jisung and Seungmin are on their way, we can meet them by the school gate,” Jeongin announced when they were nearing their school, checking his phone with one hand and holding Felix’s with the other.

“Cool, there’s still some time left,” Felix responded in a light voice, swinging their hands happily. After a moment he stepped a bit closer, wrapping his hands around Jeongin’s arm in excitement. “Wait, did I tell you what happened in P.E.?”

Jeongin tucked his phone back into his pocket and turned his full attention at the boy with an amused smile. “No, what happened?”

Felix swung his head around, scanning the area for any intruders, before leaning closer as if he was sharing a secret.

“Minho and Jisung, they are so crushing on each other! They just can’t stop staring!” he let out with an excited squeak, “I asked Minho about it and he was so flustered. I told him he should invite Jisung to the summer party, I’m wondering if he already did it. Do you think Jisung would agree?” he asked, tugging at his arm in excitement.

Jeongin rolled his eyes with a teasing smirk, the vision of his best friend panicking in front of his crush too clear in his head. “Sure, if he doesn’t faint first.”

Felix giggled in amusement. “It would be so cute if they actually went together. Minho’s going to be so flustered.”

As Jeongin tried to match his happiness, a burdensome pang made its way into his heart. With all the recent events and his relationship with Felix developing at its own pace, the topic of the Summer Party had been stuffed somewhere into a corner of his mind, now laying there forgotten and dusted. It had stopped being his priority some time ago now, but now that Felix had mentioned it, it got his mind spinning, especially with the boy being so excited about it.

In fact, the realization made Jeongin wanna bang his head against a wall. He couldn’t believe he had forgotten about it, that he still hadn’t asked. He already knew that Felix would never invite him himself, not when he was responsible for the organization of the event—probably afraid of not being able to stick to him enough due to his responsibilities. So obviously it was all in Jeongin’s hands for them to go there together.

Biting his lip nervously, he slowly came to a halt, keeping a hold of Felix’s hand and making him stop as well. A blush appeared on his face in an instant but he ignored it and stepped closer, placing his hands on Felix’s waist. As awkward as it could feel, all he wanted in that moment was to make Felix feel special, nothing more.

“What is it?” Felix asked with a nervous chuckle, eyeing him curiously. He was visibly surprised by the sudden change in his demeanor, slightly caught off guard.

Jeongin just tucked him closer, causing the boy to naturally wrap his hands around his neck. As he took in the view of his freckled face, so close to his own now, he really felt like he was gazing at a starry sky at night. Although this one seemed to carry a trace of the sun, too.

​He cleared his throat, the attention from Felix making him suddenly nervous. “I actually wanted to ask you some time ago, but um... I know that you’re in charge and all, but I was wondering if you... if you maybe wanted to go together?” The last part came out weaker than it was supposed to, and he tore his gaze away, bringing a hand up to his nape to rub it nervously.

Felix stared at him for a second with shimmering eyes, the corners of his mouth dropping down in surprise. “Ah, Are— Are you for real?” he asked, dumbfounded.

Jeongin huffed out a breath, the tension getting unbearable. Running a hand through his hair, he nodded, trying not to give in to the stress. “Yes, but, um, only if you want to. I mean, it’s okay if you prefer to go alone since you’re taking care of it all, so—”

“Of course I’ll go with you, you dumbass,” Felix cut in with an amused chuckle. “I’d love to.” He cooed in a softer voice now, tightening his grip around his neck and pulling them just a tiny bit closer.

All the tension immediately left Jeongin’s body, replaced with butterflies instead. He let out a breath of relief which slowly turned into a happy, breathless laugh, as he brushed his hair again, his chest filling with unbelievable joy. “That’s great, um, I really–”

Felix pressed his lips against his before he could finish, setting his body aflame once again. All Jeongin could do was to hold him close and surrender, barely able to comprehend his own luck. He felt like he was going to erupt.

Felix grabbed his face in between his palms, pulled away to look at him—and then kissed him once again. “You’re the cutest thing ever,” he said with another chuckle, then clasped their hands back together, pulling him to follow. “Now, let’s go, or we’re gonna be late!”

And all Jeongin could do was to follow, like the lovesick loser he was.

𒌐

When they arrived at the school grounds, his friends were already there.

And not only his friends—there was a sea of people everywhere around. Students, parents, random visitors. Just anyone interested in soccer or simply looking for entertainment on a Friday evening, as the entrance to the championship match was completely free.

Jeongin had no idea the matches attracted so much attention at their school. He had never been interested in going, not even before he became Spider-Man, with neither of his friends showing any interest in it, either. And maybe they should have, given how important it seemed to be for the school community now.

People swarmed around dressed in colors representing their teams—black and red for their school, green and white for the other. On the way to the outdoor pitch there was even a stand selling merchandise such as colorful scarves, caps, and even jerseys and hoodies. It seemed like a lot, considering that it was nothing more than a high school league—but maybe it was just how people were, looking for something to cheer for, no matter the rank.

Closer to the sports field, there was also a small area surrounded with about three different snack trucks, offering drinks and fast foods at most. This was much more to Jeongin’s interest than the cheering items and as his gaze swept around, he soon spotted Seungmin and Jisung there, too, with the latter already holding a massive bag of popcorn and a soda.

“Hey, Innie! Here!” Jisung chirped, while Seungmin waved for them to notice.

Keeping Felix close behind him, Jeongin expertly wove them through the crowd until they reached the snack stand. “Hey guys, you’re here already?” he asked with a playful grin on his face as he swiped a piece of popcorn from Jisung’s bag.

“Hey, that’s for later!” Jisung exclaimed, withdrawing the bag away from him. Then he waltzed towards Felix with a cheesy smile and offered him the bag, much to Jeongin’s indignation. “Would you like some, though?”

“How is that fair?” Jeongin gasped but stepped aside to let Felix move closer.

“He deserves it more than you,” Jisung teased, wrapping his arm around the blond’s shoulder and pulling him into a greeting hug. Jeongin was surprised but also glad to witness that, assuming his friends must have bonded a lot during his absence. “Besides, we’re basically twins. Lixie’s birthday is literally a day after mine.”

The brunette arched his eyebrow in genuine surprise. “Oh, really? I didn’t realize.”

“Yeah, we’ve discovered it recently,” Jisung said nonchalantly, finally letting go of Felix. “And that’s great actually, because maybe some day you’ll become my actual brother-in-law,” he added, giving Jeongin a playful slap on the back.

The comment left Jeongin flabbergasted, his face flushing red all the way to the tips of his ears. He shot Jisung a pleading look, silently begging him to not embarrass him any further. A pleasant flutter stirred in his stomach, though. He risked a glance at Felix, who was suddenly very focused on the menu board above the counter of the stand, a faint blush on his own cheeks.

“This makes literally zero sense,” Seungmin chimed in, casting his friend an annoyed glare.

Jeongin ignored them as he stepped behind Felix, putting his hands on his shoulders. He allowed himself a quick look at his reddened face from up close, then followed his gaze up to the menu. “Would you like anything?” he asked, his voice turning much softer and quieter.

The blond shook his head with a shy smile, switching his attention back to his boyfriend. “No, I’m okay. I’m already full,” he replied softly.

Jeongin reciprocated the smile, gently brushing the boy’s hair away from his forehead. “Nothing to drink?”

“Alright, maybe a drink will do,” Felix giggled, leaning into Jeongin’s chest. Then he turned his head slightly, bestowing him with that beautiful gleam in his eyes, making Jeongin’s knees go weak again.

“Oh look, they’ve been dating for a week and they’re becoming gross already,” Jisung remarked with a grimace, taking a sip of his soda.

Jeongin rolled his eyes as he turned around to him, his hand wrapping around Felix’s waist. “Mind your own business, Han,” he snorted, before moving back closer to his boy.

His boy . His stomach fluttered happily as his fingers traced the curve of Felix’s hip bone. He stood close behind for their entire wait in the queue, almost possessively, while the conversation smoothly traveled to other topics. It was just so easy now, to talk to his friends while making sure Felix never felt neglected in his arms. The feeling of being close made Jeongin feel absolutely content.

“Minho says they’ve already secured the best seats, so we don’t have to worry,” Felix chirped happily, checking his phone after they finally got the drinks, now walking towards the pitch.

The information seemed to have sparked Jisung’s interest, as he stumbled closer to the blond, almost tripping over his feet. “Oh, is he keeping seats for us?”

Jeongin and Felix exchanged meaningful looks before the blond’s expression switched into a mischievous one. “Yes, he is. You wanna sit next to him?” he asked, arching an eyebrow at the boy.

Jisung’s cheeks tinted with blush as he darted his gaze away, suddenly looking at his shoes. “I... I don’t mind,” he said, trying to look casual as he took a sip from his cup.

But it seemed like Felix was just getting started and there was no way Jeongin could do anything about it. So he just watched with half-amusement and half-dread how his boyfriend advanced closer, determined to tease the hell out of poor Jisung. 

“Oh yeah? I think Minho will be thrilled, though,” he said, keeping his eyes on Jisung’s face.

Jisung batted his eyelashes in genuine curiosity. “You think?”

Behind him, Seungmin let out a laugh in disbelief as he smacked his friend’s arm. “Only try not to trip in front of him again, dude.”

Which made Jisung blush all the way to the top of his ears, while Jeongin burst out with laughter.

As they were making their way to the soccer pitch, reality crashed upon Jeongin like a flash of lightning, making him feel like he had been living in a bubble. Which was quite true, though, considering the fact that since last year his life had been circling around playing superhero, helping his aunt, seeing his friends, and making sure he didn’t stay behind with schoolwork. In all that, there was simply no space left for engaging with the social life of the school.

Things, he realized, were profoundly different for Felix, though. Jeongin always knew that the boy was popular and known, acquainted with almost all social groups that could exist there, from nerds and artists to sports team members. As they navigated through the crowds, Felix was constantly greeted by somebody, either with cute smiles or with casual high-fives and pats on the back. 

And it wouldn’t be concerning at all if not for the fact that whoever approached them, they always seemed surprised at the view of Jeongin walking right by his side. Some of their eyes would linger for a moment, trying to recall his name from the depths of their memory before offering him an awkward greeting. 

Of course, he greeted them too, since he naturally recognized most of their faces, as they were all attending the same school. Besides, it was only nice of him if he respected his boyfriend’s acquaintances, no matter who they were. Even if it made his stomach curl when he saw some too good-looking faces step a little bit too close. Causing him to tighten his grip on Felix’s waist ever so subconsciously.

And it was making his self-esteem falter, too. With all those people expressing their genuine sympathy towards Felix, Jeongin found himself doubting if he was actually worth standing by his side. Every time he saw somebody looking at him with surprise, it caused his heart to clench and his eyes to dart away, pushing him to withdraw until he was nothing more than a shadow to Felix’s sun.

“Are you okay, bug?” Felix’s eyebrows were furrowed as he gripped his hand tighter, eventually noticing Jeongin’s distraction.

“I’m fine, just a bit… overwhelmed. I’ve never been to a match like this,” Jeongin replied earnestly, his eyes darting around the area to protect them from bumping into anybody.

“Don’t worry, we’re almost there.”

They managed to get to the bleachers without any troubles, with Felix leading the way to where Minho had secured their seats. With one hand clutched around Jeongin’s, he used the other one to grab unsuspecting Jisung and push him before them, leading him right onto the seat next to Minho, leaving them both blushing and dumbfounded. The action finally sparked something in Jeongin and snapped him out of his thoughts, as he laughed together with Seungmin and Felix at their friends’ situation.

The soccer team was already on the court, following their leader in a light jog in a loose circle. It was hard not to recognize Hyunjin, the star of the team, leading his teammates with a focused look on his face, his short ponytail bouncing with every step. His features were different than usual, lacking that characteristic playfulness and laid-back gleam visible there at any other times of the day. Jeongin realized that must be what drew people to him, the way he seemed to be giving soccer and his team his everything.

On the other side of the court the other team was gathering as well, only now leaving their locker room. Jeongin assumed they must have arrived later, obviously since they weren’t hosts. The more he looked, the more sensible was the tension between the two teams, the players casting each other wary glances time and time again from their respective sides of the pitch.

A moment after they entered, music was played from the speakers around the venue, filling the air with some energetic beats to power up the players. Then a voice cut through, announcing the start of the match in twenty minutes.

“Twenty minutes? I need to go and find Chan,” Felix announced and stood abruptly from the plastic chair, making it close loudly and wobble against the frame.

Jeongin blinked in confusion, his brain twitching to connect the dots and fit Chan’s name to Felix’s coworker. 

“Wait, I’ll go with you.” He grabbed the boy’s hand before he could flee, standing as well.

“Great, we’ll be back in a minute!” Felix informed their friends and tugged Jeongin towards the stairs. They had to watch their steps so as not to bump or step on anybody, making their way down from the bleachers and back to the grounds around.

“Is he already here?” Jeongin asked when they went down, now standing with their fingers laced and looking around the area.

“I’m not sure but I’m gonna text him,” Felix said, shifting his gaze between the schoolyard and his phone with furrowed eyebrows. 

“Alright.” Jeongin nodded, standing right behind him with a protective hand on his hip and making sure nobody bumped into them. He hadn’t met Chan yet, only had seen him fleetingly on his patrols around the restaurant, but still he wasn’t sure if he would be able to recognize the man just like that.

“I hope he’ll reply soon, I want to wish the boys good luck before it starts,” the blond added with an uneasy expression.

“I’m sure he will, maybe he’s already somewhere around buying snacks. Do you wanna look for him?” Jeongin asked with concern.

Felix leaned into his touch with a small smile, as if suddenly remembering he was right behind him.

“No, I think it’s better if we wait here,” he replied, tilting his head to look at him.

Jeongin’s hand immediately traveled up to his face, caressing the cheeks, brushing his fringe away. His skin was glowing in the cold lights provided by the lamps around the venue, and as the sky was becoming darker, it made him look like a creature fallen from the moon. So pretty that Jeongin wanted to kiss him again.

“What?” Felix chuckled, noticing the intensity of his stare.

“Nothing, you’re just– very pretty,” Jeongin admitted, his dimples showing. His hands were now fully waving through the blond’s hair, pulling them back as if to tie them into a ponytail.

Rolling his eyes playfully, Felix ducked his head and buried his face in the crook of Jeongin’s neck, his cheeks turning crimson. “Stooop, you’re making me blush again,” he mumbled into his skin, unable to hide his huge grin.

Contented, the brunette wrapped his arms around the boy and left a fond kiss on his cheek. “I’m just telling the truth, pretty.” 

Felix then pulled back, tilting his head to give him a beaming look. “Fine. But you’re pretty, too. So pretty,” he teased as if trying to evoke in him the same reaction, but all he managed to do was make Jeongin laugh at his cuteness.

“Thanks, babe,” he casually replied, causing the blond to groan and stuff his head back into his collarbone, his fingers lightly tangling into his hair.

“God, I need to find Chan,” the boy mumbled in annoyance, aiming to step away but Jeongin quickly pulled him back, driven by the moment.

“Can I get a kiss first?” he pouted, batting his eyelashes. After all, Felix had just called him pretty so he might as well use that to his advantage.

Yes, fine, they had already kissed a lot today. And what about it? It was already in the past, and Jeongin wanted another one now. Especially when Felix was looking at him like that.

“Mmm, I dunno. You’re one greedy spider, are you not?” Felix mumbled, already cupping his chin.

Jeongin felt his heartbeat accelerating again, his hands sliding to the small of Felix’s back. He could just lean in and steal that kiss already, but the wait somehow made it even more thrilling. So while his lips hovered closer and closer to Felix’s, he didn’t allow himself to close the distance, only chasing the phantom.

And Felix played with that, leading a path but never closing it either.

“And if I say no, then what?” he asked with a teasing, shit-eating grin. 

“Then–”

“Hey, Felix!”

A sudden, cheerful voice cut Jeongin’s reply short. He felt a jolt run through Felix, who nearly jumped out of his embrace, turning abruptly to face the source of the interruption. His hands clasped onto Jeongin’s arms which kept him steady as he gaped at whom Jeongin assumed to be Chan, his eyes open wide and freckles flooding in a deep blush in an instance. And Jeongin wasn’t any better, with heat rising to his own cheeks out of embarrassment.

“I wasn’t sure if it was you but still, I would recognize that blond head everywhere,” the man joked, his hands occupied with a soda and a hot dog. “I hope I’m not interrupting?” he teased lightly, letting out a soft chuckle then, observing them with a soft, dimpled smile.

Jeongin wasn’t sure what to do with his hands after they slid away from Felix’s waist, suddenly feeling that it was inappropriate to hold him so tightly. He wiped them on his pants, trying his best to appear somewhat decent. He already knew from his boyfriend’s stories how kind and soft-hearted his coworker was, and how much Felix appreciated him, so it was only natural for him to draw back as soon as he met him, intimidated by his presence.

Also, it did happen sometimes that his Spider-sense foreshadowed not only danger but also ill intentions from other people. And all he could feel from this man was a genuine light and kindness. No wonder Felix was so fond of him.

“You must be Jeongin, aren’t you? I’ve heard a thing or two about you,” the man grinned, tugging his drink under his arm to reach a hand out for a greeting.

“Yeah, that would be me,” he laughed nervously, offering him a shaky hand which then traveled to the back of his head. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Felix observed the interaction with a fond smile, waiting for them to properly acquaint themselves. “Great you’re here, we’ve been waiting for you. We’ve already got the seats secured, I think they’re the best ones. Shall we go? I want to wish them good luck before it starts.” He gestured his hands enthusiastically as he pointed towards the bleachers.

“Sure, let’s go,” Chan replied, grabbing his drink back from under his arm as they moved forward. “Sorry I didn’t reply to your text but today’s crowd is something else really. And I really wanted to grab these before it starts,” he said, raising his snacks pointedly.

Felix just waved his hand dismissively. “It’s fine, don’t worry. The crowd is insane, but I guess we shouldn’t be surprised.”

“It’s the semifinals, right?” Jeongin chimed in, genuinely interested. He had no clue about the high school soccer league, and now that he was here, he was curious to know more about the event.

Chan gave a firm nod. “Yeah, and if they get to the finals, they get a secured spot in the regionals next semester, maybe even a chance to play in Seoul. Quite a big deal for those looking to go pro.”

Felix ran a hand through his hair, letting out a heavy sigh. “I really hope they win. They are playing against Eunjang this time,” he huffed, giving Chan a meaningful look.

“Oh, shit, Eunjang?” Chan’s eyebrows rose as he clicked his tongue, shaking his head with tightened lips. “This is gonna be a tough one.”

His words gained even more meaning when they returned to the stadium. The air was abuzz with loud music and conversations as the stands around were almost full already on both sides. In the corner of the pitch an orchestra was preparing for the opening, with a group of cheerleaders behind them. Jeongin even noticed the team mascot—a green frog dressed in a black-red jersey—running along the lines and pumping up the audience. It was all so hectic and loud that Jeongin was genuinely surprised how much of an impact the match had on the school community—although he had an impression as if the whole neighbourhood had gathered there.

As they jumped up the stairs towards their friends, they spotted Hyunjin and Changbin chatting with them already, both of them a bit sweaty after the warm up. Hyunjin was looking especially perturbed, his hand running constantly through his disheveled hair as he kept amending his ponytail.

Felix skipped a few steps to hug them both, giving them a strong pat on the back. His eyebrows were furrowed in concern, the boy truly anxious about the upcoming game. And Jeongin couldn’t blame him, because with all that tension in the air, he himself was growing a bit preoccupied, too.

“You’ve got this, guys, I believe in you,” Felix assured them with a strong pat on their shoulders. “And don’t let Seongje get to you, Jin. You know he wants this.”

Hyunjin wrapped his arm around Felix, shaking him reassuringly. “I’ve got this, don’t worry. There’s no way I’m letting them win this game tonight.” He bit his lip, shaking his head firmly. “No fucking way.”

And then he seemed to notice Chan, his eyes darkening a tad as he propped his hands on his hips, eyeing him curiously. In fact, everyone was looking at him now, surprised and curious about the new companion.

“Oh, everyone, this is Chan, we work together.” Felix rushed with an explanation, noticing the change in their demeanor, everybody growing somewhat distant around the older man, unsure yet what to think of him. “And he’s the former captain of the team, actually.”

“Former captain, huh?” Hyunjin stepped out confidently, staring the man right in the eyes. A smirk was playing on his mouth as he stared the man down with a playful glint. “I’m Hyunjin. A pleasure to meet you.”

Jeongin was either hallucinating or the air around them buzzed with electricity.

“I assume you’re the current captain? I’m looking forward to seeing you in action, then.” Chan offered another dimpled smile, looking at the player with genuine fondness, a contrast to Hyunjin’s cold, imposing attitude. 

Hyunjin licked his lips, a small cocky smile tugging at the corners. “I promise you won’t be disappointed.”

Observing the exchange with genuine surprise, Jeongin managed to slip behind Chan’s back and join his friends in the stands, exchanging whimsical glances with Seungmin and Jisung who were just as entertained by the unfolding scene.

Because it really felt as if Chan and Hyunjin were swallowing the world around them while simply looking at each other.

“I didn’t know Hyunjin was into older guys,” Seungmin muttered just for his two friends to hear, causing them all to let out an amused laughter—and Jeongin to smack his arm for being so direct.

Hyunjin and Changbin eventually returned down to the pitch as the two teams started gathering on the sidelines, the warm-up all over with. Even the conversations from the crowds seemed to dissipate now, everyone turning their attention to the field where the orchestra was lining up to finally open the game.

“Who’s that Seongje guy you’ve mentioned?” Jeongin asked when Felix finally plopped down next to him, intertwining their hands.

The blond leaned in, raising one hand to indicate the right line of sight for him to follow. “You see that tall guy with fluffy hair? That’s him. Eunjang’s captain. Hyunjin hates his guts.”

“And vice versa, I assume?” Jeongin said as he finally noticed.

The mentioned boy was beaming almost maniacally as he kept casting provocative glances at Hyunjin. He was just as tall and well-built, but in contrast to their friend his smirk never seemed to falter. At one point their eyes met, and Jeongin could see Hyunjin clenching his jaw, while his opponent remained relaxed, grinning even wider, showing his teeth like a wolf.

“Do they know each other?” Jeongin inquired, following that gnawing feeling in his gut. It was almost certain that there was something more to those two, not just the typical tension caused by the spirit of competition.

“I guess we all know each other,” Felix said, his hands falling to his knees, one of them nervously jittering up and down.

It made Jeongin turn his attention to him, one of his palms landing on that hyperactive knee while his eyes firmly examined Felix’s. “What do you mean?” he asked with his eyebrows furrowed.

Just then the stadium erupted again, a cacophony of drums and trumpets coming out of the speakers as the orchestra made their way to the centre, making Jeongin’s question dissipate in the air. Half of the audience stood up in anticipation, some people already making loud cheers. With everyone around rising from their seats, Jeongin didn’t have another choice than to stand up as well, his hand reluctantly sliding from Felix’s leg.

The cheerleaders followed right behind the musicians, causing the crowd to cheer even louder. It was impressive to see them execute their choreography with perfect precision and grace, the acrobatics so intricate that at one point Jeongin found himself screaming as loud as everyone else—especially when one girl executed a full triple backflip, landing perfectly as her teammates caught her mid-air. After them, the team mascot entered, and finally the two teams jogged from their respective corners, positioning themselves in two lines for the anthem.

The opening ceremony was impressive given that the match was only a high school league semifinal, but maybe that was a good thing, Jeongin reckoned. It was definitely better than following dull routines and not taking anything from what life had to offer. Looking at it now, Jeongin regretted that he and his friends had never cared much for any sport events at their school, though maybe it was time to change that. Especially since now they actually had somebody to cheer for—and to cheer with.

Tension grew thick in the air when it was time for the captains to toss a coin. Both of them stepped toward the referee while their teams were already taking their positions on the field, maintaining cold faces as they listened to the man. This was probably the last time they would stand next to each other with so much composure. Even Seongje’s smirk wasn’t as unbending, dissipating only to show some respect for the referee. But then it appeared right back again when it was time for the captains to shake hands, his head cocking in a mocking way as he said something Jeongin’s ears couldn’t catch. Something that caused Hyunjin to snap his head up, his eyes blazing with a furious fire.

Even Jeongin felt stress growing inside him now as he observed the two marching to the center of the field, the dirt kicking up from under their cleats. Fortunately, it was Hyunjin who won the toss and now waited with a ball under his foot for the start of the match. There was a moment of anticipation, with even the noise from the crowd diminishing, before the whistle finally blew, initiating the game.

“God, I’m so stressed right now,” Felix breathed out, clapping his palms in excitement after a round of cheering.

The game was already unfolding, but a word from Felix was enough for Jeongin to stop paying attention.

While he tried to follow the advancement of the match, it was mostly to keep his conversation with Felix going. Jeongin asked questions even when he could deduce the answers himself, just to listen to the boy’s enthusiastic explanations. He loved the way Felix’s eyes sparkled when he tried to both answer his questions and keep his eye on the match, often breaking his words with loud cheers for the team whenever they were at least near scoring a goal. Besides, it was just so hard to pay attention whenever something more thrilling unfolded, as all he could think about was Felix overwhelming his space, gripping his thigh or simply leaning in out of excitement.

The only thing that didn’t go unnoticed by Jeongin was the palpable tension between the two captains. Both of them owned the game as they sprinted and surged across the field, violent and unstoppable. The contrast between them was striking, with Hyunjin remaining cold and concentrated, executing every movement with precision. Meanwhile, Seongje was like a storm, wild and untamed, disturbing the perfect scenario Hyunjin was trying to create for his team.

It happened when Hyunjin was on the attack, making a sharp cut to his left after an opening had appeared. Just enough for him to find the perfect way forward after one of his teammates had passed him the ball. The crowd roared, people screaming their lungs out as the chance got closer and closer—but right then, Seongje appeared like thunder, literally out of nowhere and surging straight at the boy in black-and-red, leading them into an inevitable collision.

Seongje’s shoulder met Hyunjin’s with a sickening crunch, sending him stumbling with a grimace stretching across his face. Caught off balance, he lost control of the ball, and that was just enough for the other to snatch it right from under his feet. The tides turned, with Seongje’s team now leaping toward the goal.

“What the hell was that? Can they just bump into each other like that?!”

And it ended with the Eunjang team scoring the first point.

The goal caused an absolute eruption within the crowd, some of the spectators booing the no-call from the referee’s part, others cheering their lungs out. It also put their team off their stroke, with Hyunjin almost ripping his hair off in frustration. All of their friends stood up in agitation, joining in the indignant turmoil.

For the remainder of the first half, it was all a mess. The fight had grown even more fierce, with none of the players allowing themselves to slack even for a second. Jeongin eventually lost track of time and the happenings, the match turning into a whirlwind of fouls and near-missed strikes. The crowd kept groaning and shouting, and at some points, communal chants even made their way into the general noise. Jeongin wasn’t accustomed to being surrounded by so many intense stimuli, and it was a real challenge for him to keep paying attention.

Finally, a whistle announced the end of the first half and a break. The teams jogged off the pitch as cheerleaders took their place for a quick performance. Jeongin breathed a sigh of relief, finally able to sit back and soothe his mind.

“Hyunjin’s so pissed,” Felix commented, his knee jittering nervously. “I really hope he doesn’t give in.”

“That referee’s dumb as hell,” Chan said, shaking his head in disapproval. “Or blind, I don’t know. He should’ve called a foul the first time that guy pushed him.”

“But Hyunjin’s too good for that, right?” Jeongin asked, a hopeful note in his voice. “He wouldn’t get thrown off just because of some jerk.”

Felix just huffed out a breath. “I hope so.”

The second half was even worse than the first one, but it seemed like Hyunjin had come back into focus. His hair was all wet and damp from sweat, his face red, but it seemed like the team was coming back with a new determination, starting off with sharp precision, as if following a new plan. And fortunately, this time it didn’t take long for it to pay off. After a series of quick passes, Changbin broke through the Eunjang defense and delivered a perfect cross to Hyunjin, the boy appearing literally out of nowhere and meeting the ball with his head, sending it flying into the back of the net.

The stadium exploded in a deafening cheer. Jeongin found himself screaming along, his voice hoarse from the excitement. Felix screamed even louder, falling into his arms as they jumped out of joy.

​It was a weird feeling, being so lost in the game with his only thoughts now circulating around the question of whether their team was going to win or not. Jeongin’s mind was used to analyzing and responding, not just feeling and experiencing. So as he jumped and screamed with others, he couldn’t shake off the feeling that it was all because of Felix that he had started doing that, too.

Leveling the score seemed to piss the other team off, their expressions shifting from those lingering smirks into grimaces. Seongje licked his lips as he marched back to his position after that goal, his eyes never leaving Hyunjin—at which a gnawing sensation filled Jeongin’s gut.

With their school team receiving a new wave of determination after scoring a goal, it seemed like they had become unstoppable. Eunjang was trying fiercely to push back, but at the same time, Hyunjin’s team had found a new rhythm which was hard to disturb, causing the audience to go wild.

As the final minutes ticked away, Hyunjin seized an opportunity. After a round of swift passes between some of his teammates, he got past two defenders and was sprinting toward the goal, the ball glued to his foot. He was running at a full speed that still allowed him to keep control of the ball, dashing like a storm nobody wanted to be involved with.

​But just as he was about to make his move, Seongje slid in from the side, having sprinted all the way after him—and then he leaped with his leg aimed not for the ball, but for Hyunjin’s shin.

The brunette fell to the ground with a sickening cry, his hands flying up to clutch at his leg. The enthusiasm around dissipated immediately, people stopping to wonder what was going on, some gasping, some objecting already.

“Shit!”

The referee’s whistle reverberated, the man running to Hyunjin to examine the situation. Then he drew a yellow card pointing it at Seongje, much to the crowd’s indignation. 

“What the fuck?! This should be a red card!”

Meanwhile, the other players converged, rushing to Hyunjin’s side or trying to confront Seongje, who just walked away from the scene with a cold, satisfied smirk on his face. Changbin was furious, running behind him and almost pushing him while also screaming at the referee, demanding justice—which ended up with a yellow card being drawn at him, too.

After a quick check up with medics, Hyunjin finally managed to stand up, limping but determined, convincing them about not needing any help. He insisted on taking himself the free kick the referee had awarded them, to the relief of both the audience and the team. The decision seemed to finally wipe the smirk off Seongje’s face, the man spitting violently under his feet, biting his lip and probably praying for Hyunjin’s injury to be severe enough for him to miss.

But he didn’t. He sent the ball soaring into the goal, with no chance for the goalkeeper to catch it—causing the crowd to turn wild again.

After a few more minutes of enthusiasm and some ridiculous attempts by Eunjang to improve their pathetic situation—the match was over. With their school team winning and advancing to the finals. The players and their fans screaming wildly, the whole team now running to Hyunjin to slap his back, then to lift him off the ground and carry him on their shoulders. Their cheers blending with the roar of the crowd.

And they were going wild on the stands two, the six boys now wrapping their arms around one another and jumping all together with loud screams escaping their throats. 

A voice boomed over the loudspeakers, announcing the final score of the match and congratulating the winning team on making it to the finals. The team mascot and cheerleaders stepped forward into their respective side of the court, followed by the orchestra providing an uplifting melody.

The teams lined up then to shake hands, and as they moved down the line, it was impossible not to sense the contrast rising between them. Their shakes were strong, and although most of them weren’t really giving away any tension, it did appear when Hyunjin and Seongje passed each other. The two of them staring each other down as if they could leap for their throats at any moment. Although it didn’t matter anymore, now that the game was over.

“So, are we getting that pizza now?” Seungmin asked, standing up from his seat and leaning towards the rest to let them hear through the on-going noise.

“I thought they would go to a party or something after winning?” Jeongin asked, confused.

Felix chuckled and ran a hand through his ruffled hair, his cheeks pink out of all the emotions. “No, Innie, Hyunjin would never let them party before finals. It’s reserved for the final match.” He grabbed Jeongin’s hand and looked around the others expectantly. “Let’s go, we can wait for them down there!”

It took them a few minutes to get out of the stands as they first had to follow and go along with the river of people who also decided that it was the right time to leave now. As they slowly moved down, Jeongin made sure to keep hold of Felix’s hand, the other one on his hip as he kept him close to his chest, protecting him from the crowd’s impact. He pulled away a little only when they reached the open space, all of them slowly walking to where the changing rooms for the outside court were located.

Hyunjin and Changbin joined them soon after the few minutes they needed to get ready, some other teammates following along. They were all buzzing with positive energy after the win, and it took another moment for them all to part ways, as everyone kept patting each other on shoulders and enjoying the feeling of victory in general.

“So, we’re all set on pizza tonight, right?” Hyunjin asked with his hands hidden in the pockets of his varsity jacket. His black hair was ruffled and his face tinted with red and stretched with a huge grin, the boy evidently proud of himself and his team.

“Oh, god, yes! I’m so hungry!” Jisung groaned, clutching Minho’s arm dramatically, while the other boy just stood next to him and bore it.

“You’ve literally just eaten a whole bag of popcorn,” Seungmin remarked. 

“And what about it?” Jisung tilted his head with an innocent expression.

“Hey, good game there. That was some good defense going on,” Chan said, patting Changbin on the shoulder. He then turned to Hyunjin, his expression softening with concern. “You good? Man, that looked rough. Seriously, though, you’re one hell of a captain.”

Felix’s expression turned into a troubled one as he stepped closer to his friend with Jeongin following right behind him. “Are you okay? I can’t believe that bastard got away with that,” his voice tight and pitched with worry.

Hyunjin’s smile was soft when he responded, tilting his head a little. “Don’t worry, guys. It’s nothing. We won, that’s all that matters.”

“Still, that asshole should have got a red card. I can’t believe they didn’t kick him off the game the first time he ran into you,” Changbin huffed, crossing his arms tight over his chest.

At the same moment, another group of boys appeared right from behind the corner. Jeongin turned around right when the sound of their footsteps reverberated into his ears, the whole group following suit—to see nobody else but a bunch of the Eunjang’s players.

With Seongje in the lead.

“Well, well, if it isn’t the star of the show,” He smacked his lips, that cocky smirk back on his mouth as he sauntered in their direction. “What’s up, missing me already?”

Tension filled the air immediately, all of their bodies tensing as they turned toward him, going silent and watching his every step. Felix’s grip tightened on Jeongin’s hand, his body stiffening beside him. Hyunjin’s and Changbin’s faces darkened, Chan gave a worried frown, Seungmin and Jisung exchanged worried looks. Among them all, Seongje remained the only person to not give a shit and smile, enjoying himself way too much.

Blood pounded in Jeongin’s ears as he took a step towards Felix, pulling him just an inch closer, his eyes never leaving Eunjang’s captain. He knew already that the boy was a jerk, but he hadn’t exactly expected him to corner them even after the match. And he very much didn’t like that smirk of his. So blatant as if he didn’t give a damn in the world, as if all he was doing was just for sheer fun, never bothered with any consequences. Like a maniac.

“How’s your leg, pretty? Still not bad enough?” he sneered, eyes set on Hyunjin.

“Good enough to kick your ass.” Hyunjin stepped a tad closer, hands still in his pockets and let loose. His jaw was clenched tight, though, not matching Seongje’s attitude at all. “How is it though? In pain much after losing?” He tilted his head then, but the tint of a smile that appeared wasn’t giving what is was meant to at all.

The remark made Seongje scoff an amused laugh and shake his head, sticking his tongue into the side of his cheek as he chuckled. “You’re a brat, aren’t you? One spoiled bratty prince, always getting whatever he wants. Wailing like a girl when somebody dares to touch him.” He gave a mocking, provocative pout, his voice leaking with fake sympathy.

“I’m not dealing with you, Seongje. We don’t give a shit about you, go cry somewhere else,” Hyunjin countered, letting out a small sigh.

Seongje tilted his head to the side, the corners of his mouth dropping. “Oh, I was hoping you would entertain me just a little more.” He then looked around their group, gaze fierce and evaluating, the smile back on his lips. “Such a sweet, little assembly. I was hoping we could have a little fun but you all look so tense.”

“Go away, Seongje. Nobody wants you here,” Felix cut in but his voice was so small, and Jeongin could literally feel him trembling. 

Seongje’s head turned at him instantly, his eyes glinting like those of a wolf finally catching sight of its victim.

“Look at this, little doll trying to play hero,” he said with amusement, his teammates laughing along behind him. He licked his lips, his gaze glued to the blond boy now. “Just stay quiet and look pretty, that’s what you’re good at.”

Jeongin’s vision turned red, the fearful tension of his boyfriend beside him working like a flicker to his fire. “What did you just say now? Don’t talk to him like that,” he interfered, taking a step forward, sheltering the smaller boy.

With a sneer twisting his lips, Seongje’s eyes narrowed on Jeongin now, appreciating him like a new toy to play with. “Oh, the blond slut got himself a boyfriend now? How cute.”

Jeongin leaped like a gunfire, hands letting go of Felix and leaping for Seongje instead. He grabbed the collar of his hoodie as he brought him closer in a pull so forceful that it caused the guy to stumble. His friends gasped behind him, he heard a ruffled movement, but he ignored it all. Somebody said something, but he wasn’t paying attention. His focus was full on that smirking bastard now.

“Shut the fuck up,” Jeongin spat, but that sickening grin remained unwavering, now laughing right into his face. 

“What, you like that pretty face?” Seongje was still having fun, even when his body swayed in Jeongin’s grip. He stumbled closer, now to murmur right into his ear—yet loud enough for others to hear.  “Or is he a good whore just like his mother?”

A disgusting thud echoed when Jeongin shoved him against the wall of the changing rooms building next to them, his body weighing nothing in his grip. The air escaped Seongje’s lungs with a huff and just for a second his smile faltered, surprised by the sudden impact. The boys around them shouted with surprise and protest, but Seongje didn’t even have time to react because Jeongin was pulling him from that wall again, his vision blurred and spinning, ready to push that asshole to the ground.

But then somebody’s hands clutched Jeongin’s arms and pulled him back, tearing him away from the player.

“That’s enough, Ayen. Don’t.” Chan’s voice was firm like a stone, not matching Jeongin’s dizziness at all.

Jeongin gave him a fierce stare, trying to shake his arms off, but in vain. “Let me go, I’ll fucking–” 

“No, you won’t. Stop this,” Chan was shoving him back now, positioning himself in front of him. “He’s not worth it.”

Seongje was now back on his feet, his stupid grin back on his face, provocative. Jeongin’s blood surged as he was ready to jump at him all over again, but this time Hyunjin was faster. He snarled and lunged, but Changbin’s arm shot out, grabbing his shoulder and yanking him back with a grunt.

“Don’t be stupid,” Changbin growled, holding him firm.

Seongje’s minions finally moved, approaching but still keeping their distance, waiting for their leader to react. Like bulls with no brain and tongue, they just stood there still and quiet, only sometimes laughing in the back, like a choir to their leader’s performance. Waiting for his move, for his orders.

“We’ve got places to be, boys. Let’s go now,” Chan demanded in a voice that didn’t take objection into consideration, already pulling Jeongin with himself. Changbin helped him, pulling seething Hyunjin, too.

Seongje said something but it didn’t quite reach Jeongin’s ears as his attention had switched to Felix now. His face dropped when he saw his boy so small now, curling into himself as he walked, avoiding anyone’s gaze. Jeongin wanted to come and hug him immediately, to cup his face and caress his cheeks, but he couldn’t. Chan was holding him hard, and even though Jeongin could easily push him away, he had enough self-control left not to use his strength against him. He never dared to use it against those who didn’t deserve it. Always aware of how bad it could end up.

Their friends followed them in silence, nobody daring to speak until they left the school building behind. Chan had been keeping him close for a few minutes now and Jeongin was losing his mind, unable to get hold of Felix. It seemed like nobody even tried to approach the boy, all of them too scared and confused by this whole situation, not daring to touch the cracked porcelain when it could so easily crumble. And it was breaking Jeongin’s heart apart.

As soon as Chan let him go, Jeongin walked towards Felix, ignoring anyone else. With a frown framing his expression, he reached his hands out, allowing the blond to touch him first. His whole body breathed a sigh of relief when Felix intertwined their fingers.

“Are you okay?” Jeongin asked in a tone quiet enough only for them to hear.

Felix gave a tiny nod but didn’t lift his gaze, rather shifted it even further away. Jeongin’s heart clenched, but he decided not to push. He wrapped his arms around Felix’s shoulders, pulling him closer protectively, and Felix wrapped an arm around his waist, giving in.

They walked like that all the way to the pizzeria, the conversation slowly growing between their friends. Only Jeongin and Felix remained passive, but in view of the recent events, nobody complained about it.

The restaurant was warm and cozy, filled with the tasty smell of baked yeast dough and oregano. The interior glowed with a dim, orange light, the walls embellished with wooden beams and small hanging lamps. Jeongin would have fallen in love with the place, if not for the dark clouds occupying his mind.

The eight of them sat in a lounge in the corner, shuffling uneasily in awkward silence. Seungmin, Changbin, and Jisung were the ones to talk the most, slowly leading the conversation into a light one and away from the past events, although they kept casting worried glances at both Jeongin and Felix. Even Minho was trying his best to entertain the talk, and when Chan joined in as well, they all managed to shift the mood to something more pleasant.

After making their orders, they fell into reminiscing about the old times when Chan attended their school three years ago, gossiping about the teachers that were still there, some memorable events, and his journey of discovering his real passion apart from soccer. When the topic of the team appeared, Hyunjin joined in as well, slowly cozying up, laughing along and adding some remarks of his own, his chin resting on the back of his hand as he observed Chan with sparkles of interest in his eyes.

Jeongin was trying to listen but all he could really care about in that moment was the sulking blond on his right. Felix had been silent for the whole time, a ghost of a smile appearing only from time to time to at least pretend he was listening. But besides that, he separated himself completely. The only thing that didn’t allow Jeongin to lose his mind was the fact that, despite his silence, Felix remained close to his side.

At some point, Jeongin found his hand lying on his lap under the table and took it, looping their hands together. He moved his thumb across his knuckles in slow, little circles, the small hand almost drowning in his hold. Felix’s palms were cold and a little dry after the whole day, although still softer than his own. Nonetheless, they felt just right.

Jeongin didn’t want to impose again, but he couldn’t help his thoughts drifting away, analyzing the whole day. It seemed like with every next minute everything he knew about Felix was becoming more and more complex, like a puzzle with ten thousand pieces that were scattered everywhere but not in their designated box. He knew it was going to be a tough journey, maybe even an impossible one, to get to know everything. To find a way to help him.

Evidently, Seongje was one part of that puzzle, somehow knowing both Felix and his friends—and Jeongin had a strong feeling it wasn’t just about soccer. It was definitely something more personal, it had to be, given what he had said into his ear, given how pleased with himself he was even after losing the game, given how much joy it brought him to tease and foul Hyunjin. There were so many little things about this whole situation that Jeongin’s head was spinning when trying to comprehend them all.

About an hour had passed after they came to the restaurant, some pizza pieces and drinks  still left to finish and the conversation now flowing much more easily and joyfully. Even Jeongin was participating now, laughing with everyone else, and making sure to involve Felix as well, squeezing his hand and casting him soft, encouraging smiles. The freckled boy was still resolved, having spoken barely a few sentences for the entire time they spent there, but it was okay. Nobody really minded, nobody pushed. Everyone seemed to understand his need for emotional withdrawal—and even if they didn’t, at least they didn’t want to cause him any more pain.

The only person who didn’t seem to be at ease with his behavior was Chan. Jeongin could see his worried glances, they even had exchanged some, but Jeongin was always the one to quickly look away, intimidated by the older man. It wasn’t that he didn’t like him, quite the contrary, he respected him. And maybe it just made him worried whether Chan deemed him the right person for Felix to date, especially after what had happened.

So it was much to his surprise when the older student stood up from their table and announced he was going to the bathroom—casting Jeongin a meaningful, urgent look before leaving.

Fortunately, Jeongin understood.

“Oh, actually, I need to use the bathroom, too,” he quickly excused himself and gently helping Felix stand up from the edge of the sofa, he let himself through before following Chan with quick steps.

Once he entered the room, the man was already there, standing with his hip resting against a sink. He propped himself with his hands on it, fingers tapping on the ceramic.

One of his hands traveled to his hair as soon as Jeongin entered, giving it a nervous ruffle. “Hey, Jeongin, um. I wanted to talk.”

“Okay,” Jeongin mumbled, slowly closing the door behind him. A shiver of cold crept down his spine, his head already spinning with a dozen different scenarios. “What is it about?”

“Felix. Of course it’s about Felix.” Chan let out a long exhale. “You care about him a lot, right?”

Jeongin gave a small nod, his palms clenching and unclenching. “I do.”

“That’s good. Yeah.” Chan’s gaze shifted to the floor, and he was silent for a moment, pondering. Then he shook his head, his lips tightening into a line. “I’m worried about him, you know. Not just because of today, but in general. I know he’s going through a lot, though I have no idea what exactly.”

Hearing somebody else sharing the same worries was like a soothing balm on Jeongin’s brain. He finally moved from where he was standing beside the door and walked to the sink next to him, propping himself with his hands as he faced the mirror.

“I’ve noticed it too, but whenever I ask, he never wants to talk about it,” Jeongin admitted with a resigned sigh.

Chan bit his lip, gaze turning to the ceiling. “I don’t know if I should be telling you this but… just yesterday, we talked about you. Or rather about him and his… inability to open up.”

“Oh, really?” Jeongin lifted his head, curious.

“Yeah.” Chan gave a small nod. “And it seems like whatever is wrong, he really wants to keep it to himself.” He squeezed his eyes shut, sighing. “I don’t think it’s good for him, but at the same time, I have no idea what I could do. But then he talked about you with so much fondness and I thought… I thought maybe you would be able to do something.”

Jeongin’s hand on the sink tightened, his knuckles turning white. He swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. “I… I don’t know what I can do. I don’t want to push him and I don’t think he will talk to me.”

Chan offered a small smile, pushing himself off the sink and placing his hand on Jeongin’s shoulder.

“You don’t have to push him, Jeongin. Just give him time.” He rubbed his shoulder reassuringly. “You may not notice it yourself, but he’s really changed after you came around. Smiling whenever he gets a message from you, I think.” His gaze fell to the side now, soft and light. “You have no idea how happy I was to see you two together. You care for him, and he visibly cares for you. So if there’s anyone who can help him, then it has to be you.”

Jeongin watched him for a moment, then turned his gaze back to the mirror, staring at his own reflection. The words slowly sank in and something spread across his body, the feeling unrecognizable yet.

He took a deep breath and slowly nodded his head. “Fine. I’ll try.”

“Make sure he’s safe, okay? Don’t leave him to the wolves. And if anything happens, if any of you need any help… You can always talk to me, too,” Chan added, his eyes softening.

“Thanks, I’ll remember.” Jeongin offered a thankful, genuine smile.

The man patted his shoulder one last time and turned to leave, allowing Jeongin a moment alone to collect his thoughts before going back to their table.

The door closed behind him with a soft click and for a moment there was complete silence, broken only when Jeongin let out a tired sigh. His brain was starting to drift again into that scheme of analyzing and seeking answers, but he quickly shook it off and moved to splash his face with cold water. There was no time to dwell, it was not the right moment. Right now, he simply needed to pull himself together and get back there. Get back to Felix.

With one last check in the mirror and a few quick fixes to his hair, he finally exited the restrooms, slowly strolling back to the guest area. And as he walked, Chan’s words reverberated in his head.

Make sure he’s safe.

Yeah, Jeongin definitely could do that.

Chapter Text

Tonight, the world was weeping.

Heavy drops drummed against his window as rain poured from the dark sky, filling his room with a deafening symphony. It had been raining for hours now, the sun not having appeared all day. The streets glistened with water pouring into the drains, while passing cars sent plumes of it into the air from under their wheels. The whole city appeared dull, enshrouded in the heavy veil of dark clouds, the blurred glow of distant streetlights bleeding into the wet asphalt.

Felix had been lucky to experience a brief weather window on his way to and from school, with only a light drizzle accompanying him to work. The real downpour had started barely after his bus rolled down into the bus stop by his apartment building, forcing him to sprint all the way there with nothing more than a jacket to cover his head. And it poured and poured, not stopping even when the boy was already in bed. Loud and suffocating, breaking the passage of time and bringing what was unwanted up to the surface.

​Surprisingly, this time Felix had stepped into an empty home.

The flat was eerily silent when he entered. A glass bottle tumbled loudly under his foot barely a step inside, making him flinch at the sound, unsure yet if he was in fact the only person there. He quickly picked up the bottle from the floor before it could roll any further and carefully advanced into the flat, leaving his shoes in the hallway. He was ready to greet his mother—but this time she wasn’t there.

Fortunately.

Felix let out a sigh of relief and ran a hand through his hair, his eyes closing for a brief moment as he worked to compose himself. The whole day had been so draining, the heavy weather sucking out every tiny drop of his already low fuel. Each day was worse than the last, his body and mind carrying him as if he were barely there, falling apart with every passing second, appearing worse each time he woke up.

Provided that he actually woke up.

Because lately, Felix hadn’t slept well. He almost hadn’t slept at all.

​He was still deeply embarrassed about falling asleep throughout their entire meeting at Jeongin’s place last Saturday. They were supposed to be finishing the History project that day, as it was supposed to be presented a few days after. The problem was that despite his full determination on getting it done together, Felix fell asleep after barely a few minutes of cozying up in Jeongin’s arms on his bed.

​Jeongin had pulled a soft blanket over them with Felix tucked against his chest, convinced that it was enough if he kept the laptop on his lap and wrote down everything they discussed himself. As all the slides were already done and the necessary information already gathered, the only thing they needed to do was outline their presentation and write a scenario for their speech, so Felix gladly agreed to do it that way.

​He hadn’t expected Jeongin’s embrace to be so overwhelmingly comforting, lulling him into the deepest slumber he had experienced in months. He didn’t wake up until the sun cast its golden rays on his face, his boyfriend’s window facing right at the west. The room was filled with a warm glow when he blinked his eyes open, sleep crusts sticking to his lashes and giving him a hard time coming back to his senses. His body was hot and sweaty after the long nap, too warm from the blanket and Jeongin’s proximity, and when he looked down, there were sleep lines marking his arms.

​He had blinked once more then, finally noticing the body beneath him, the boy resting peacefully on soft pillows with one hand wrapped around Felix’s shoulders, only now sliding lower as it followed his movement. The other one was holding a manga, the laptop long forgotten and abandoned on his nightstand. Then his eyes switched to him, a smile appeared, and a soft kiss was placed on Felix’s cheek, bringing him out of his dreamy state.

“Hi, cookie,” he had greeted in a soft mumble, dimples showing in his cheeks.

Felix was slow to move up, barely keeping his eyes open, taking in his surroundings. He looked at the closed laptop with confusion before finally propping himself up, one hand traveling up to wipe his eyes. “Wait… Is it evening already?” he asked then, his voice low and hoarse after the long nap.

And Jeongin just smiled at him in the cutest way possible, completely unbothered by the fact that he had to spend half of the day unmoving and lonely as Felix had fallen asleep on top of him. 

“Almost,” he replied, dragging his fingers through Felix’s hair. “Have you slept well?”

Felix squeezed his eyes shut with a frustrated sigh, finally moving to sit up. “Jeongin, why didn’t you wake me?” he asked querulously, dragging a hand down his face. “We were supposed to work on the project.”

Jeongin nodded innocently, his gaze never leaving Felix’s face. “Yeah, and we did. It’s finished already,” he said, patting the top of his laptop.

“But you did it alone. Without me,” Felix argued, giving him a stubborn look.

The brunette lifted himself up from the pillows then, leaning over to rest his chin on Felix’s shoulder. His body was so warm and comfortable against him that it caused a pleasant shiver to run down his skin. Involuntarily, he shifted himself closer.

“You looked so cute I didn’t have a heart to wake you. You can’t expect me to be strong enough to do it,” he explained with a soft chuckle, his hair tickling Felix’s cheek. “But I’ll send you the text to look at when you have a moment to spare. In case you’d like to change anything.”

Felix nuzzled his cheek against his head, breathing in the sweet scent of his hair treatment. He couldn’t find it in himself to argue. “I’ll look at it for sure,” he sighed, then his lips curved into a gentle smile. “Though it’s probably perfect, already.”

And then he pressed a soft kiss on his cheek, the last traces of his regret melting away.

For the whole week, it had been going on just like that, with Jeongin always being so considerate and thoughtful, no matter what Felix did. Back on his Spider-Man duties, he wasn’t always able to meet him right before classes, yet he always made sure to send him a ‘good day’ text—sometimes with a silly selfie of him in the mask, swinging high above the streets. The first time Felix had received such a pic, it made him worry sick, unable to think clearly until he saw the boy at school. And the boy had laughed at him then and kissed his temple, reassuring him once again that nothing bad was going to happen.

​Felix was slowly getting used to it now. To his boyfriend being by his side one moment, then in a different part of the city the next. Always trying to meet him when he was done, sometimes with a bruise, and sometimes with a sweet treat just for him. Greeting him with chaste kisses, sliding randomly on his web from a nearby building and giving him a tiny heart attack on his way to work. Then catching him after his shifts, offering to swing him back home, which Felix always denied. So he swung him just to the bus stop instead, giving them more time to sit there and talk—with a few kisses exchanged in the meantime, too.

In general, Felix’s life had been going pretty much the same as before, without many changes to his routines. It was only Jeongin who brought a breath of fresh air into his days, disturbing their usual course. He filled the spaces around him that used to be empty before his entrance into his life, asking him about his days and allowing him to vent about every tiny thing that had caused Felix any disturbance. He would hug him then and kiss him, somehow always able to make all his demons disappear, even if just for a while. And sometimes he was the only reason for him to smile.

After what had happened on Friday evening after the match, Felix was afraid that this little bubble of comfort he always had around Jeongin was going to disappear. He was afraid that the boy had had enough, that he was going to demand answers, demand explanations. Sick of his shit already, having discovered yet another thing about him that didn’t match his perfect image.

But it had never happened. After Friday, the topic of Seongje and his cruel words had simply dissipated into thin air. Nobody mentioned him anymore, not even Hyunjin. And Felix was more than grateful for that because if somebody actually asked, he wouldn’t have any idea what to say.

His connection with Seongje was nothing more than a fruit of the usual rivalry between two different schools over various inter-school events. Being Hyunjin’s friend since childhood, Felix made it a point to attend every soccer match he could, unless something truly important came up. Although he himself had never been interested in becoming a player, he found a lot of fun in watching the matches, especially after Hyunjin started playing on a more competitive level. This was also how they ended up at one of Busan’s best high schools—Hyunjin wanted to join the team there, and Felix figured the school’s high ranking would offer great prospects for his own future.

Keum Seongje had appeared in their lives in the first year of high school, back when Hyunjin hadn’t even been the team captain yet. It had been the first game of the season, the day just as rainy as this one, with a drizzle making the grass all wet and slippery. With nothing more than tiny drops falling from the sky, the match took place as planned, at the outside soccer pitch of Eunjang High School. Felix remembered it well, being one of the few spectators who decided to watch the game in such bad weather, hidden under an umbrella with Lee Minho, the classmate he’d got acquainted with on the first day of high school—the poor boy having agreed to join him even before the weather forecast could have predicted a rainy day.

Hyunjin and Seongje had kicked it off on bad terms within barely the first few minutes of the match. Both of them, playing their first game of the season in a new team, were determined to prove themselves and their right to play on attack. Occupying the same positions in opposing teams, the rivalry between them was only natural to grow sooner or later, especially under the pressure of showing their best sides. So when the collision between them finally happened, it was of no surprise to anyone.

It was hard to tell whether it was intentional or not, not when the grass was so wet from the rain and their heads so overwhelmed by stress. Nonetheless, it had all started with Hyunjin. Seongje was all in the moment, running with the ball glued to his foot, storming through the pitch in a blatant euphoria of an imminent goal. But just when he was about to kick, Hyunjin slid in from the side, and as his cleats lost their grip on the ground, he fell right under Seongje’s feet, tackling him to the ground as well. Both of them hit the slick, wet grass with a thud, the impact sending mud and water spraying in every direction—and with Seongje’s ankle getting painfully twisted and excluding him from the rest of the game.

And Hyunjin apologized. He did, of course he did, but it didn’t matter. The moment Seongje plopped down on the bench unable to walk properly, there was no going back. It was like a war declaration, a spark that had lit the fire within Seongje, transforming his frustration and sense of injustice into a new, deep desire to make Hyunjin’s life miserable from now on.

It hadn’t even been Hyunjin’s fault. All he had done was try to win the game, just like everyone else. Nobody had control over their bodies in that slippery terrain, and they hadn’t been the first nor the last to fall that day. Only Seongje had been unfortunate enough to get hurt from the fall, with consequences too severe for a young boy like him on such an important day to let them off easily.

And his hatred lasted long, even after he came back to playing after barely a month. Determined to make Hyunjin pay for what he had done. To make him feel what he had felt when he couldn’t play that day. To show the bastard where his real place was.

As it had later turned out, Hwang Hyunjin was too easy to hate. The more Seongje knew about him, the more reasons he found to despise him. The first turning point had been somewhere at the end of the first class of high school, when the local soccer tournament was won by their school team. Later on, when Hyunjin had been admitted captain next year even before Seongje had a chance to become one as well, his hatred had grown even deeper.

But soccer wasn’t everything. Besides becoming captain, Hyunjin had so many other traits Seongje lacked. First of all, he was simply pretty and good-looking—nobody could deny the effect his perfect facial features and thick, black hair had on everyone, nobody could resist the fierce look of those dark eyes. He was like a picture ripped straight from a k-drama, handsome, tall, and talented. With that pretty little chihuahua and happy, loving family of his, living in a pretty little house in a cute, charming neighbourhood where all the downsides of Busan didn’t seem to reach.

And finally, he had friends. Not just dumb, foolish bulls ready to follow him everywhere like a scared flock of sheep. He had real friends, ones he could laugh with and share his dreams with, ones he could call when he needed and spend time with on a weekend. Friends who had his back, friends who truly liked him for who he really was, friends who were ready to jump into fire for him. Friends who came for almost every match to cheer for him, like nobody ever did for Seongje.

As luck would have it, Felix happened to be one of those friends.

The Busan Youth Expo was an annual event held in a small city conference center, where every local high school was invited to participate. Its goal was to bring together not just students, but also scientists, artists, and people in positions of leadership to exchange ideas and inspire one another, encouraging the city’s youth to become more creative and think seriously about their futures. In addition to exhibitions showcasing areas of study like biology, chemistry, physics, and visual art, there was also a section where high school delegations could present their academic programs to middle school students, encouraging them to enroll.

As the newly elected school president in the second year of high school, Felix had been obligated to participate in the event as the leader of his school’s delegation.

Along with Jisu and other members of the school council, they had a booth assigned for their use. The preparations for that had taken them about a month prior to the event, since apart from their educational offer they also had to prepare an actual presentation for the guests of the expo which was about to prove the educational accomplishments of the school.

It had been right after the presentation when Felix had met him alone for the first time.

The bathroom next to the auditorium was surprisingly empty when Felix came out of a stall to wash his hands. He looked into the mirror and smiled to himself, a rush of relief washing over him. The presentation had been looming large in his mind since Mr. Kim had chosen him to lead their school delegation at the Expo, and even though it made him excited, he was glad it was all over now. And apparently, as he deduced from the audience’s enthusiastic reaction, their team had done a great job.

Once he adjusted his hair and dried his hands with a paper towel, he took one last deep breath and smiled, his heart much lighter now that he was ready to rejoin his friends. So he moved from the sink and walked into the corner toward the exit—and that was when his heart skipped a beat and his body stopped, shocked to see the last person he would have expected to meet at the Busan Youth Expo.

Because right there, playing a game on his phone with no care in the world, Keum Seongje was crouching by the wall, blocking his only way out.

As if he had been waiting for him. Waiting for Felix.

The boy took his time, keeping his attention on his phone for a moment longer before a smirk pulled at his lips and he finally moved his head to look at him. There was a pair of glasses propped on his nose, something that never accompanied him on a football field, now making him look almost innocent. But Felix knew better than that.

“Ah! Levanter’s president. What a pleasure to meet you,” Seongje greeted him, then looked back at his phone’s screen, completely unimpressed by Felix’s frozen posture. “I was surprised to see you here but that’s where you belong, I suppose. Given your little… promotion.” He giggled to himself, a sound so disturbing to hear coming out of his mouth.

Felix was trying hard to stay calm, his heart pounding loudly against his ribs. After so many months of seeing Seongje at the matches, after witnessing all the violence, swearing, and impulsiveness that always marked the boy’s behavior, his body reacted naturally, recognizing the presence of a predator. But this time it seemed like there was no way out—Felix had found himself right in the lion’s den. 

“Oh, hi! What are you doing here?” he asked unevenly, his hands wiping nervously against the material of his black slacks. He tried to seem surprised but not in a bad way, keeping his voice light, so as not to provoke him.

After all, Felix was used to unpredictability. He knew how to move to avoid being attacked. More or less, at least.

The boy gave a shrug, his grin stretching into an even more sickening one. “Supporting my school, I suppose. Why, didn’t expect to see me here?”

He looked at him again, his eyes gleaming with something Felix couldn’t quite recognize. Could have been just a reflection of the bathroom’s light, as far as he was concerned. Felix couldn’t tell, he was too stressed to think straight.

His fingers fidgeted with his rings then, arms staying loose by his sides. “No– not really.”

Seongje watched him for a moment, causing the blood to pound in his ears, before letting out another giggle, accompanied by a light shake of his head. “Right, I didn’t expect myself to come either. But here I am. Which is great, otherwise I wouldn’t have seen your presentation. It was quite impressive, I have to admit. Must have taken a lot of time to prepare.”

“Yeah, um. Thanks.” Felix said, his eyes darting to the corner as if searching for another way out. Shifting his weight from one foot to the other, he waited for Seongje to speak again, but it didn’t seem like the boy was in a rush, his attention turning back to his phone and thumbs tapping vividly at the screen. “Well, um, it was nice talking but I really need to go back to my group now, so–”

“Shibaaal, not again!”

Seongje’s loud complaint cut his words short, causing him to flinch instead. He watched the boy groan and tilt his head back, almost hitting the tiles on the wall behind him, the hand holding his phone dropping down in defeat. 

“Sorry, I got shot.” He chuckled then, one hand clasping against his thigh as he slowly rose to his feet. “What were you saying?”

With his silhouette towering over him now, the difference visible not only in the height but also in the general build of their bodies, Felix was feeling even more intimidated. He had no means or power of protecting himself if the boy decided to hurt him. Felix had never been one to participate in fights, he was too thin and weak to have enough courage and self-esteem to consider himself actually able to win. The only way he used to protect himself were his words—but they hardly ever seemed to be enough.

“My team is waiting for me. I need to go back to our booth now,” Felix replied, trying to ignore how wrong and forced every word that slipped out of his mouth felt. As if it was another person speaking and he wasn’t quite there anymore, floating away from his own body.

“You’re already leaving? How come, we’ve barely had a chance to talk!” Seongje groaned theatrically, throwing his head back and swaying in his steps, the movement drawing him an inch closer.

And Felix took a step back immediately, trying to create some distance. Seongje’s every move was like wind, like a wave of the sea that drew back only to return to the shore with twice as much impact. The type of waves only a fool would jump into.

“I’m sorry, I really don’t have time–” the boy explained hesitantly, his gaze shifting to the side, examining his chances.

The bathroom was too small for him to escape. There was no point in backing into a corner, not when his back was going to meet a wall anyway. So Felix waited until they were both in the main room of the bathroom, until Seongje was far enough from the passageway for him to slip behind his back—before he flashed the boy his best apologizing smile and tried to pass him.

“Woah, watch out.” Seongje’s hand shot immediately in his direction, blocking him as it fell on his shoulder, stopping him with a push. “It’s no good to rush so much on bathroom tiles. They can be slippery.”

He then took a step closer, imposing himself into his space, stealing away his last chance of escaping. And Felix just moved along with his steps as if they were dancing, allowing himself to be backed into a corner, as all he could do was simply hate not anyone else but himself and wish that once in his life he was something more that a scaredy cat, that he had the guts to stand up for himself, to intimidate Seongje the same way he was intimidating him.

But even when Seongje’s hand traveled up to curl a strand of his hair around his finger, he didn’t dare to move.

“Why are you alone here, anyway, hm?” he asked, tilting his head to the side as his gaze wandered all over his face, scrutinizing. “Where’s that bratty friend of yours? I thought you were stuck together with glue.”

“He’s not part of the school council,” Felix explained, darting his eyes away, unable to keep them on the boy anymore. He took a step to the side but Seongje’s hand remained by his face.

Seongje was more than amused by his words, the room filling with his pearly laughter as his eyes crinkled by the corners.  And then, in a split second, it was gone. His expression hardened and so did the grip on Felix’s hair as his fingers clutched onto the strands and moved his head back with a forceful pull.

“Yet you still come and cheer for him every time. Why is that?” he sneered through clenched teeth, his grin pulling and unpulling as if he couldn’t decide whether he was angry or entertained. Before Felix could reply, he pulled at his hair even more, dragging his head to the side to have a better look, lips now stretching into a grimace. “And what the hell is this, are you really bleaching your hair like a girl? Are you trying to become a doll or something?”

Felix felt himself trembling then, eyes filling with tears that could spill at any moment. Seongje was asking questions and he was unable to respond to any of them, he didn’t think it was even a good idea. In fact, there didn’t seem to be any good solution to this situation. From the very beginning, Seongje had been there with a clear goal set, and that was to show him where his place was. Because that was just how he was—pushing and imposing, until everyone around bent their knees before him. And while Hyunjin was strong enough to battle against him, there was no way Felix could make any move that wouldn’t make things worse.

 “I’m sorry. I really need to leave,” he said instead, blinking hard but steady, his body twisted uncomfortably to follow the direction of the pull.

Seongje observed him for a moment, then finally loosened his grip, laughing again like a maniac. “Don’t worry, I’m just messing with you, that’s all!” He giggled, giving Felix’s cheek a gentle pat. “I really wanted to meet the cheerleader who attends every single game. It’s impressive, really.”

“I– I just like to watch them. It’s… fun,” he admitted, glad to be free from the boy’s grasp. His mind was spinning, completely taken aback by the constant changes, by the way Seongje’s demeanour shifted its course like a leaf in a tornado. But if Felix was one thing, then it was adaptable, and it sat deep in his nature to observe the situation and play along when he could.

“You think so?” Seongje tilted his head, appearing more than amused.

Felix nodded eagerly, his heart too naive to believe that every move he made was just to hunt him down. So when he saw the boy smile and retreat, he almost wanted to breathe a sigh of relief—because in his language, it seemed like they were finally coming to terms.

So when the words started spilling out of his mouth, it again felt as if it was a different person speaking. With Felix witnessing the situation but again not really being there himself. Because would he in his right mind ever play along to those shenanigans, would he allow Seongje to treat him however he wished in a chosen second? It was hard to tell, because at that moment, Felix was everything but in his right mind. In fact, it didn’t seem like his mind was working anymore at all.

“Yeah, I mean, I can’t really play myself. So it’s fun to watch you guys play. Especially this league, it’s on another level.” He offered a shy smile, a wave of shame washing over him when he realized how sweaty his palms were, the skin on his nape prickling. “You too, uh, you’re a great player, actually,” he blurted out before he could stop.

Seongje was stunned just for a second, freezing still in his tracks, before a sudden, amused snort escaped him, the room soon filling with his laughter once more. Louder and sharper than before, as he threw his head back, the sound echoing against the tiles. 

“Ah, shibal, you’re so funny,” he replied with an amused sigh, his eyes crinkling as he looked at him. He took a step closer, and then his hand was back on Felix’s face, cupping under his chin and pushing it forcefully to examine as if he was a piece for a museum. “You’re quite pretty, aren’t you? So it would be a real shame to have this pretty face ruined.”

The pounding in Felix’s chest was like one of a hammer, the boy standing still and trying to steady his breath. There it was again, a hand on his body, using its opportunity only because it knew it would be met with no resistance on his part. Because again, Felix was unable to move, unable to even comprehend what exactly was happening, too scared and too lost in Seongje’s actions. With only a quick realization falling upon him that, while Seongje had always been a trouble, he could become a real threat at any moment now. Or that maybe he already had.

“I’m not– I’m not looking for trouble,” he finally breathed out, eyes fixed on the taller student. Watching his every move now, since he had already stepped too close.

“Not looking for trouble, huh?” Seongje’s smile wavered then, his hand never moving away from his face. “And yet you still manage to piss me off, sitting there and cheering at every fucking match.”

The gleam in his eyes had been full of hatred then, Felix had no doubts. It wasn’t hard to recognize that look, he had seen it already far too many times in the eyes of his mother. Whenever she looked at him, especially when his actions hadn’t matched her expectations—and that equaled quite often. So when he saw the same light—or the lack of thereof—in Seongje’s eyes, it was hard for him to breathe.

“I’m not– I don’t go there f-for you,” he managed to respond, his whole body trembling when Seongje’s fingers increased their hold on his chin, digging into the skin.

Seongje just rolled his eyes in annoyance. “I know that, you moron. But you cheer for your captain, don’t you? Like a stupid little cheerleader,” His hand moved to pull at his hair again, twisting the strands like he was playing with a toy. After a quick look at him, he finally forced him to turn to the mirror, his mouth stretched into a grimace as he stared at their reflection.

And at that moment, when Felix saw his own face there, he had never wanted to look away so badly.

“God, are you even able to stand up for yourself or not?” Seongje asked, keeping his head pulled in an uncomfortable angle. “This is so boring.”

The next thing that happened was another person entering the room, breaking the contact and summoning the smile back onto Seongje’s face as soon as they heard the click of the door. Casting him a wary glance in the mirror, Seongje slid his hands into the pockets of his wind jacket and swayed to the side, acting as if nothing had happened. As if it all had been a charade, an innocent joke between them, unimportant to anybody.

The man joining the room didn’t even spare them a glance, just entered the first empty stall, leaving them with nothing more than awareness that whatever they were going to say, he would hear it all. And Felix used the moment to increase the distance between them, stepping back to stand next to the nearest sink, his cheeks flushed and his whole body trembling as he propped his hands on the ceramic. In a nervous impulse, he reached for the tap and washed his hands again, hoping for the action to ease the atmosphere—or to at least wash off the heavy weight that had settled upon him. Which was hard to do as Seongje, even despite the sudden interruption, remained a solid presence in the room, looming right behind him.

He couldn’t wrap his mind around it, around the reason why Seongje had cornered him in that bathroom. They had never even talked before that, had only seen each other at the matches but still, it hadn’t even crossed Felix’s mind that the player could have noticed him there in the stands. He was nothing more than a spectator, going there just to cheer for his best friend. And yet, somehow, that was enough for Seongje to hate him.

Soothed by the presence of another person in the room, he took a deep breath and turned around to face him, grabbing a paper towel to wipe his hands. He was convinced that even if Seongje had intended to hurt him before, he certainly wasn’t going to do so now, not with a witness in a place like the city conference center, attended by a much wider variety of people than just students and teachers.

“I’ve been to almost every match since Hyunjin joined the team. Not just against your school,” he finally spoke, his voice low and hesitant. All he could offer him was a shy glance before his gaze fell back down to his hands. “I go there because he’s my friend. I’ve never–” He finally gathered the courage to look at him. “I’ve never even talked to you.” 

Seongje stared at him then, right into his eyes, unmoving. Felix waited for a moment, waited for a response. For him to understand that Felix had never meant anything wrong. Because, well, misunderstandings happened and it could all be just this, a one big misunderstanding. But Seongje still wasn’t saying anything, so eventually, with a heavy sigh, Felix turned around from him to throw away the used piece of paper and finally leave the bathroom.

Just as he turned his back, he felt a sudden heat above his shoulder, the warm breath almost tickling his skin.

“Do you know what comes when you hang out with the wrong crowd, blondie?” he mumbled right into his ear, causing an eruption of dreadful goosebumps to rise across Felix’s skin, his body freezing where he stood. “Trouble comes. And it can screw your life.”

With his nose almost pressed against Felix’s ear, Seongje held him frozen. Felix’s gaze darted to their reflection in the mirror, where Seongje’s eyes met his own with a cruel intensity. And as he took a deep inhale, the whoosh of air so loud that it seemed gnawing at his skin, that sickening smile was  pulling back at his lips, as if nothing had happened.

He moved away from him before Felix could react, letting out yet another amused giggle. “Take care, cheerleader. I guess I’ll see you at the next match, huh?” He tilted his head, staring at Felix in the mirror, his shoulders shaking with laughter.

As the sound of a flushed toilet reverberated behind them, Seongje was already moving toward the exit, his nonchalant steps carrying him away. He cast Felix one last giddy glance before the door clicked and he was gone, leaving him alone in the room with just that random man.

Back then, Felix couldn’t help but consider the man his savior. Nonetheless, the profound feeling of dread that Seongje inspired had followed him even after he was gone. It never really went away, becoming another link in the heavy chain of his worries and adding to the immense weight he was already carrying.

Because even though Seongje hardly ever interacted with him directly, his hatred had never stopped.

Felix hadn’t understood it back then, and he never understood it after. Not when Seongje had cornered him and his friends in an alley of the city on a random Saturday, when all they’d wanted was to spend an evening together. Not when he’d shoved Hyunjin into a wall upon running into them at the shopping mall or when he’d spilled his drink on Felix when they’d stumbled upon each other at a beach bonfire party last summer. Not when he’d almost started a fight with Changbin at Yeji’s birthday party. And definitely not when he and his lackeys tried to provoke a fray after almost every match between their teams.

But most of all, nothing unsettled him more than the fact that Seongje somehow knew about his mother.

Tossing and turning in his bed now, in the heavy silence of an empty flat interrupted only by the consistent pouring of the rain, Felix couldn’t help but wonder how it had happened. Considering the choice of words Seongje had used to insult him, he had no doubts that the player somehow knew about his mother’s love life. And there was a lot to talk about, because while alcohol was her one way of escapism, sex seemed to be another.

The memory of Seongje calling both him and her a whore had been replaying in his mind time and time again after that Friday night. The lines had wretched themselves hard into his brain, having been loud enough for him to hear every single word. And now they remained there like a mantra, like a course cast upon him to remind him about what his mother did. And what’s even worse, that Seongje knew all about it.

Another thing he remembered was the way Jeongin had grabbed Seongje back then, his eyes burning with a kind of fire Felix had never witnessed there before. Such a contrast to their usual glow, filled with so much warmth and concern, like he would never hurt a fly. And yet there he was then, leaping at Seongje like he was ready to tear him apart.

Deep embarrassment washed over Felix every time he thought about it. The first thing he had felt then was nothing more than surprise—both at Jeongin’s rage and at the words spilling out of Seongje’s mouth. Followed by a wave of dread when the realization had fallen upon him that everything he had been trying so hard to protect was then spilling out of his grasp and smashing into a million pieces. And while he was grateful and touched that Jeongin tried to protect him, never having felt more safe around anyone else—it just pained him too much that while Seongje’s words had been hurtful, they were also true.

Because for a long time, Felix’s nights had been reserved to only two sounds.

The first one was the complete silence of an empty flat, just like tonight. Tinted with the fear of being broken at any moment and present mostly when his mother decided to go out for the night, leaving him alone in a dark, silent space, with shivers crawling up his spine as he could never be sure if she was going to come back at any moment.

Because while sometimes she spent the whole night out, there were also times when she came home. And when she did so, she often wasn’t alone.

Bringing the other kind of sound. The one that had made Felix fall in love with the silence.

He had learned to read the sound of the front door. A click, a fumbling of keys, a set of footsteps that followed. Voices sometimes muffled and mindful of the third person present in the flat, and sometimes uncaring at all, loud and disgusting, turning his nights into a living nightmare. Then the pounding of the bed on the other side of the wall, accompanied by moans, at times even by loud slaps. Each person bringing a different cacophony, but every one of them able to tear away another piece of his heart.

Somewhere around the second half of May there had been an interruption in the schedule, with only a few nights turning into torments while most of them were spent by his mother alone or simply not being there. Which had caused Felix to think less about his mother, especially when he had so many other things to worry about in the meantime. Yet with the arrival of June, with the air becoming hotter and thicker, with the passing of the days—there it was happening again, his mother either out of the house or there with a man to accompany her for the night.

Giving Felix no other choice but to link the sudden increase of the visits in the span of the last two weeks to whatever Seongje knew.

The pouring of the rain had somehow managed to lull him to sleep just as the sky was at its deepest stage of darkness, his dreams unsteady and hectic, reflecting the tension with which he had fallen into slumber. With a sleep so light, it was no surprise when his eyes shot open at the sound of the moving lock of the front door, loud in the silence that had followed the passing of the downpour.

The voices were shushed and muffled, his mother’s laughter merging with the groans of the man, his voice much lower and deeper, accompanied by shuffling and thuds of pushed furniture. Something clicked and suddenly there was light slipping into his room from the slit under his bedroom door, tearing away the last hopes he had for waking up well and rested.

Felix’s hand was fast when it shot out to grab his phone and headphones, rushing to block out the unfolding scene, before his body stilled completely under the duvet. His full attention was on the screen of his phone, its brightness hurting his eyes in the dark even at the lowest setting. But he wouldn’t dare to move to turn on the lights. No, he was going to stay there in his bed unmoving for as long as it would take for them to finish.

At this hour every one of his friends was already asleep, the usual mess in their group chat having stopped a few hours ago. He scrolled through the messages once more, allowing the memes and jokes to soothe his mind a little, before he returned to the main screen of KakaoTalk where his thumb hovered over Jeongin’s profile picture.

He wondered what the boy was doing now. His sleeping schedule was a mystery, the boy being able to function on no-sleep for a few days without any disturbance while still needing to get enough rest when he was able to, just like an average person would. Jeongin often told him about it, how even with superpowers sleep remained a necessity and that he tried his best to sleep whenever nothing more important stood in the way. Therefore at the moment he could be either sleeping, hanging out in his room, or swinging through the city, and all Felix could do was guess.

 Because well, he wasn’t going to text him now, no matter how much he craved to do so. It would only break another illusion Felix was creating, the one which was supposed to make his boyfriend convinced that he spent his nights resting and asleep.

He turned to lie on his side, the phone sliding out of his hand next to his pillow, as a single tear slid down his cheek, soaking into the pillowcase. He squeezed his eyelids shut, nails digging into the insides of his palms as he forced them into fists, trying to focus on the music playing through his earpods.

He had thought about it many times already, imagining what it would feel like to reveal Jeongin the truth. To tell him about everything that was happening in his life, to admit that he lived in a parody of a household with nobody to love him. Such a contrast to Jeongin’s aunt, so loving and understanding, always ready to take care of him even when she wasn’t able to comprehend the entirety of his actions. With Jeongin having to keep his secrets from her only for her safety—not for his own fear.

Which was probably another one of the reasons why Felix wasn’t able to tell him. 

The coat of the night was slowly giving way to the strokes of light blue and purple when Felix decided to get up from bed. The apartment had fallen silent again, the noises gone about thirty minutes ago, indicating the adults were done and probably asleep. A perfect time for Felix to gear up for the day and get the hell out of the flat before he could bump into anyone.

His every move was measured and precise as he walked to his wardrobe to pick clean clothes for the day, changing into them even before leaving for the bathroom. It was better this way, getting ready in advance in case the coast wasn’t clear when he left. He slid the pajamas under his pillow, covered the bed with a blanket in a sequence of a few quick, feverish moves, and checked his backpack before leaving with it already slung on his shoulder. Opening the door slower than he normally would, careful for it not to creak too loud, before he finally scooted across the flat towards the bathroom.

He allowed himself to take a deep breath only after turning the lock closed, grateful to have moved without any witnesses. The last thing he wanted was a confrontation between him and that stranger, a man uncaring enough to barge into somebody else’s house in the middle of the night, disrupting his already poor sleep. Even if he had all the right to do so, since the flat was a property of his mother, with the man being her guest and Felix only happening to inhabit the same space as her. As if he was the real interruption, not the man coming there for the first time.

His hands trembled as he tried to move around as always, the bottle of body wash falling down from the shelf under the shower with a loud thump, then a basket placed on top of the bathroom cabinet flipping over when he reached for a comb, the wooden and plastic tools slipping out of it with an unnerving clatter. Leaving him with nothing more than a mere hope and a prayer for them to be too tired to hear, to stay asleep long enough for him to grab a breakfast and leave before anyone would notice.

Which was why his heart leaped up to his throat when he emerged from the bathroom, hectic and determined to get everything done quickly, with the last thing expected to see being the stranger already awake and meddling around in the kitchen.

Felix stood frozen, his feet rooted to the floor as the man turned towards him, a steaming cup of coffee already in his hand. He must have made it while Felix was in the bathroom, Felix deduced, staring first at the cup and then back at the man, unable to look away. He hadn’t expected that at all, but now, slowly coming back to his senses, he tried to calculate his next move, with his hunger fighting for dominance over the strong desire to flee the scene.

“Morning, kid.” The man’s voice was gentle when he spoke up, lifting the cup up in a greeting movement. “Are you off  to school already?”

“Yeah,” Felix mumbled, his gaze fixed on the drink, the boy too surprised and wary to speak more. The man had caught him off-guard, disturbing the whole plan and routine he was supposed to follow. Him occupying the kitchen hadn’t been in the script when Felix was leaving his room, his early wake up time chosen specifically to avoid any confrontation. Given that they always slept in, his mother and her lovers.

​But of course this man had to be different, a goddamn morning bird with errands to run since the very start of the day, throwing a wrench into Felix’s meticulously crafted routine. Causing a disturbance and creating a problem Felix was now supposed to face. With him having absolutely zero will to interact with the man, no matter how kind his smile appeared. He didn’t care, the man’s sole presence in this building was enough for Felix to hate him.

The man gave him a small nod before turning back to the cabinet, placing the cup on top of it. Despite the circumstances, he seemed pretty normal and down to earth, his clothes clean and casual, hair only slightly disheveled. There was nothing to point out, especially not with the small, polite smile stuck to his face, his expression gentle and truthful, slight wrinkles marking his forehead. It was a strange change in comparison to other men his mother used to bring home.

“I’m making scrambled eggs, would you like some?” The man asked as he reached for a pan, looking at Felix over his shoulder.

“No, thanks. I’m not hungry.” Felix’s voice was low when he replied, his eyes leaving the stranger and falling to the basket of fruits, only two apples left since the last time he’d done groceries.

“As you wish. You’re leaving quite early for school, are you not?” The man was still trying to engage him in a small talk and Felix was slowly growing annoyed. The last thing he wished for was a conversation with the man. Every new word that came out of his mouth made him feel sick.

“I have some things to do,” he replied simply, grabbing the apples from the basket and throwing them into the pocket of his jean jacket.

“Good luck, then.” The man offered another smile, the skin around his eyes crinkling. Then his expression changed at a sudden, his mouth opening in a surprised thought as he put the pan away and reached for his pants, tugging out a wallet. “Here, buy yourself something to eat later, will ya? My treat.” He cast him a wink, taking out a green banknote and sliding it into Felix’s hand.

The boy stared at it for a moment, surprised by the gesture. 10,000 won. More than enough for a meal, he supposed. He blinked in confusion, before giving in and reluctantly sliding the bill inside the pocket of his black pants, unable to resist the small sigh that escaped his lips.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, the word coming out in a little rude manner, but he didn’t care much. His lips tightened into a line as he nodded, his steps slowly backing him towards the corridor. “I’ll get going,” he added, pointing behind himself.

“Of course. Good day to you, kid!” The man chirped before finally turning away from him, his attention now on the gas stove.

When the door closed behind him, Felix felt like he was going to erupt, his body brimming with adrenaline as he rushed down the stairs. The money hidden in his pocket seemed to be burning his skin right through the material, and only a small remnant of self-consciousness was stopping him from taking it out and throwing it away, no matter how much it was. He couldn’t believe the man’s audacity, and even more his own lack of shame that had pushed him to take the cash from him. It had all gone wrong, not how it was supposed to from the very beginning, and Felix wanted to bang his head against a wall now.

The air was still chilly after the previous downpour, causing him to regret not grabbing an additional hoodie. Even though the weather forecast predicted a warm day later, now it was still a bit too cold for just a T-shirt and a jean jacket. He pulled the cloth tighter around his torso, hunched against the wind, and quickened his pace, clenching his jaw in frustration. God, he was so done with this whole day already.

While kindness had always been a trait he appreciated in other people, he couldn’t find it in himself to accept the kind gesture of the man. It just pissed him off so much, the man being so different from all the other bastards he’d had a pleasure to meet, all of them having treated him like a spoiled, ungrateful brat while this one simply smiled at him and even offered him money. Felix had no idea how he was supposed to feel about him, and it made his anger grow even more. Especially that the stupid money was the last thing he needed.

Busan was slowly coming back to life after the rainy night, its citizens starting to stir and begin their day. More and more cars filled the streets, from time to time spreading the water from puddles that hadn’t got a chance yet to evaporate. The sky was also lightening, the street lights already able to turn off with the sunlight peeking from behind the horizon, and with the first sunrays touching his skin, Felix could feel the previous tension starting to dissipate.

Having crossed a few streets since leaving the flat, Felix plopped down on the nearest bench with a heavy sigh, his hand making a nervous run through his hair. His classes weren’t starting for another three hours, leaving a lot of time to spare, but there were not many options to go. Even the school library would be closed at this time, which complicated the situation. Apart from a park, there were not many other places to go, with even the local cafes opening only later in the morning.

After a moment of silent crisis, Felix stood up from the bench, throwing his backpack back on in a careless movement. His shoulders were hunched and fingers clenched onto the stripes as he proceeded down the street. He went past his usual bus stop, not sparing even a single glance at the schedule. There was no point in driving all the way to school if he wouldn’t be even allowed to enter yet. So he just walked instead, not caring much about the direction, allowing his feet to carry him wherever, just to pass the time.

Meddling around all those people who seemed to already have a place to rush to, he almost felt like homeless. His eyes were sensitive and heavy from the lack of sleep, the skin of his face unpleasantly dry. Even the fact that he’d managed to wash himself didn’t change much, the exhaustion quick to overpower every last part of his body that hadn’t showed it off yet. Making him feel like a zombie.

Which was why his head spun and ached when suddenly a police car sped through the street past him, the sirens too loud for his liking. Yet it still managed to get his attention, a grimace crossing his face at the ringing sound but with his head rising to look up nonetheless. A movement wrenched into his blood already, making all of his previous worries disappear as he stared at the buildings above, searching for the familiar blur of red and blue.

And soon there it was, a figure swinging from a building to a building somewhere further away, crossing the street above him and following the course of the police cars. Appearing just at the right time as always, ready to face whatever danger the city had in spare for him this time.

Spider-Man.

His Jeongin.

Felix almost tripped over his own feet as he set off running. The people around threw him resentful glances when he fled past them but he didn’t care, his own heartbeat filling his head with a thumping too loud for other stimuli to hold much significance. Because now he needed to get to the scene as soon as possible, before something bad could happen.

Given that the last time he had seen Spider-Man following sirens like that, he then had to patch him up from the unconsciousness.

It must have been only his luck that the crime scene was taking place only a few streets from where he was and not on the other side of the town—although luck appeared to be the last thing present when Felix finally arrived at the location.

The building of the national bank was surrounded by police cars already, the policemen keeping the small crowd of bystanders that had already managed to gather behind the yellow tape from passing. They were all trying to see what was happening, some craning their necks and others simply keeping their phones high to record, determined not to miss anything important. With some reporters already describing the unfolding events to their respective cameras on the side of the crowd, too.

More and more police cars kept arriving, their wailing sirens cutting through the din as they blocked off every surrounding street. Felix held his breath when he noticed special forces emerging from vans and surrounding the building, their bodies covered in helmets, safety vests, and with heavy guns carried in their arms making him realise how serious the whole situation was. His head spinned when the whole turmoil was joined by the barking of dogs, too, their handlers shouting orders as they entered the building, probably trying to locate whoever had barged inside.

Or whatever else that had caused such chaos at six in the morning. Felix didn’t even want to think about it.

Pushing his way through the crowd he managed to get to the front of the nearest yellow tape, trying to question the nearest officer, but in vain. The blood was pounding in his ears and his hands felt clammy, his brain already full of the worst scenarios it could generate. He needed to know what was happening, needed to know if Jeongin was already there inside. Nothing else mattered anymore and all he could think of was his boyfriend risking his life once again.

His eyes darted through the people around until they fell upon a man with a phone lifted high and recording, his face covered with a cloth that vaguely resembled Spider-Man’s mask. Its quality was a far cry from Jeongin’s original craftsmanship, but it was enough to catch Felix’s attention, pulling him through the crowd like a magnet. His eyes were fixed on the man like on a lighthouse until he reached him.

“Hey, excuse me!” He called out even before he arrived next to him, his breath heavy and uneven from all the exertion and stress. “Sorry, did you see Spider-Man? Is he inside?” he inquired, words coming out in an abrupt stream as he tried to get the man’s attention.

The spectator nodded his head immediately, one finger tapping his phone. “Hell yeah, dude! He flew there like a rocket. It’s a shame you didn’t see it but don’t worry, I’ll be putting it all on You-Tube!” He then gave Felix a strong, reassuring pat on the shoulder, as if pitying him for not having been able to witness the arrival of the hero.

A lump formed in Felix’s throat as he turned his gaze back to the building, eyes still searching for the red-and-blue figure even though he knew the boy was already somewhere inside. And all Felix could do about it was stand there and watch, with no means of knowing about his boyfriend’s exact whereabouts or well-being. Which in turn was making him go crazy, especially when he took in all the police forces that were needed to handle the situation.

All he had managed to deduce from his observation was that apparently the bank’s security had been breached by the robbers, allowing them to enter inside even before the scheduled opening. Assuming from what the reporter next to him was saying, the robbery might have been arranged with the help of somebody from the inside, probably a worker with access to the security system, able to disarm the alarms and gain entry to the main vault. The details about the rest of the group were unknown yet, some federals only assuming the group to be organized and professional, probably having planned the robbery for some time in advance.

It didn’t take long for Felix to get lost in the track of time. The policemen kept shouting, the onlookers kept gossiping and recording, the reporters kept waiting for the event to unfold. And Felix just stood there among them all, with goosebumps rising across his skin and stomach churning from both stress and hunger. But there was no way he was going to eat that apple he kept in the pocket of his jacket now, feeling as if he could throw up after barely a single bite.

Feeling as if ages had passed before the shouting cut the anticipation.

“Hey, over there!”

“Look, is it Spider-Man?”

“Quick, they are running away!”

“All forces to the west exit, I repeat, all forces to the west exit!”

The commotion almost pushed him to the ground as people leaped towards the direction of the shouting, everyone eager and determined to get the best view at the city’s superhero handling the criminals. Adrenaline coursed through Felix’s veins as he found himself moving along with the crowd, unable to resist both its strong current and his own anxiety. His vision was a blur when he tried to make best of his view, eyes skimming through the area in search of the familiar figure.

And then he emerged, launching into the air high above the ground, legs drawn close to his body and arms spread out for better balance in a long, high jump, the view stealing the air out of Felix’s lungs. With the time appearing to stop just for a mere second, like a pause on a video before it unclicked, Spider-Man making a graceful landing on the ground next to the robbers. All three of them disarmed with his web in a span of seconds, helpless and floundering to break themselves free but in vain, the duffle bags filled with cash lying there by their feet like a painful indication of their failure.

Spider-Man didn’t entertain the crowd for long, offering them only a quick, graceful bow before fleeing the scene. Not sparing a glance at anything or anyone, ignoring all the reporters and even the police officers. No testimony or explanations, as always focused solely on getting his job done.

And while the attention of the crowd switched to the criminals and the policemen as soon as the superhero disappeared, Felix found himself running. His eyes were fixed on the direction where he last saw Spider-Man, his breath coming out in short, uneven puffs as he maneuvered among the people, not caring anymore about whether he bumped into somebody or not. Somebody’s groan came past his ear, somebody’s elbow shoved into his side, the boy himself tumbling into somebody’s shoulder when trying to skip past them. Not really registering any of it until he stumbled out of the crowd into the streets, rushing forward and darting his eyes everywhere around, determined to find Jeongin.

Thwip.

Something attached to his backpack, the pull stopping him in his steps. And then an arm wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer, and suddenly, he was flying all the way up to the nearest rooftop.

With his already overwhelmed state his brain barely registered the movement, the pavement under him growing smaller and smaller before his feet touched the ground back again in a matter of a few seconds. He turned around immediately, his heart beating fast as he already knew who was behind him. He didn’t spare him a glance, just lunged forward and tucked himself against his chest, wrapping his arms around the other boy to pull him as close as he could.

“I thought you didn’t see me,” he breathed out, his voice muffled by the proximity of their bodies.

“Of course I saw you, I just didn’t want to attract attention with all those people around,” Jeongin explained, placing his arms around Felix’s shoulders. He was so warm, especially now when he pulled him closer, that Felix thought he was going to melt. “What are you doing here so early, babe? Did you run all the way there?”

The blond shook his head, “No, I was nearby when I heard the sirens. I saw you swinging above and I followed.” 

His hands traveled to the boy’s nape now, fingers searching gently for the edge of the mask before gently peeling it from his face. Jeongin looked back at him with a soft gaze, eyebrows drawn down in concern, cheeks still flushed from the earlier exertion. His hair was slightly disheveled, some strands sticking out in different directions, the sight so endearing that Felix couldn’t help but smile and lean in for a kiss.

Jeongin reciprocated it with a satisfied hum, one hand moving up to rest on Felix’s cheek, just to keep him there for a moment longer. And Felix felt himself drowning in the sensation as if he were floating on a cloud. He moved their lips together, hungry and craving as always, even more so after having to worry about him so much. Grateful that the boy was now right there, next to him and only for him. And most importantly, all safe and sound.

“Good morning,” Felix said once they pulled back, a grin stretching across his face. The frantic drum of his heart was slowly turning steady, even though the air had just been stolen from his lungs with the kiss.

“Good morning,” Jeongin replied with a smile just as wide, his face not indicating any traces of the fight at all. “I didn’t expect to meet you so early like this but I won’t pretend I’m complaining.” He breathed out a laugh, dimples in his cheeks showing.

Felix watched him with adoration, keeping his palms placed behind his neck. “Trust me, I didn’t expect it either. What even happened there? Nobody hurt you, right?” His eyebrows rose in concern then, one hand sliding into the boy’s hair.

“No, don’t worry, I’m all right.” Jeongin let out a sigh, closing his eyes slightly when the boy’s fingers scratched behind his ear. “They were just some thieves trying to rob a bank for the first time. They didn’t even notice me until it was all over.”

“Oh, really? There was so much police I thought it was serious,” Felix noticed, his hand moving to put the brown strands back in order. He scanned his face in search of any injuries or scratches but fortunately, this time he found nothing.

Jeongin allowed himself to be caressed, his own hands finding their way down to rest on the small of Felix’s back. “Well, the whole security system was out, so I guess it caused all that commotion. It must have been some insider. A worker confident enough to convince his friends into a robbery or something. I don’t know, I usually don’t ask.” He shrugged with a soft chuckle.

“I’m glad you’re okay.” Felix sighed, a genuine weight lifting from his shoulders.

Jeongin nodded, tilting his head playfully. “Yeah, it wasn’t that bad, they were rather clumsy. Holding a gun for the first time in their lives I think. And I didn’t expect a robbery to happen so early in the morning, but whatever they like, I suppose.” His eyes crinkled with a wide smile. “Did you see how I knocked them down before they could run?”

Felix let out a low chuckle, endeared by the boy’s excitement. “Of course I did, everyone was in awe. Not to mention you beating them alone with all that police around.”

Jeongin puffed his chest out slightly, a proud, goofy grin spreading across his face. “I know, right? At least you got a good show for a better day.”

Felix smacked his arm at that, his expression appalled. “A good show, my ass! I was worried sick for you.”

“I promised I would always come back safe, didn’t I?” Jeongin’s smile softened and his hand rose up to his face, a thumb covered in spandex brushing across the freckled skin under his eye.

“Yeah, but still. It looked serious,” the blond mumbled, resting his cheek against the warmth of Jeongin’s palm.

A shadow of worry crossed the boy’s expression then, eyes darting across Felix’s face. Even before he spoke, Felix was already able to tell what was going through his mind, hard to ignore the way his eyebrows furrowed.

“What about you, baby? Did you have trouble sleeping again? It’s just– so early,” Jeongin said in a voice much softer now. The words careful and hesitant, probably still keeping in mind the way Felix had reacted about it the last time.

Something clenched in his stomach, a strong pang of guilt gnawing at his guts. The topic hadn’t been brought up again since their last conversation in the park. Felix knew that Jeongin wanted to ask him every time they met but he kept it to himself, knowing how heavy it was for the blond to talk about it. Especially after the situation with Seongje, with Jeongin growing even more mindful around him since then. Never daring to bring up a sensitive topic unless it was Felix who wanted to talk about it.

And maybe Felix was starting to regret it. The way his own insecurities were slowly causing Jeongin’s caring nature to fade.

He dropped his gaze to the ground, leaning in to rest his forehead on Jeongin’s shoulder just so as not to look him in the eye. A lump growing in his throat, blocking the truth from escaping.

“I had a nightmare,” he mumbled, finding the expression close enough to the real reason why he was outside so early.

“I’m sorry.” Jeongin’s arms closed around him, tucking him safe to his chest. He nuzzled his cheek against Felix’s hair and hummed in agreement, understanding. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Felix shook his head, eyes squeezing shut. “No, it was just– super weird.”

He didn’t explain why it had caused him to go out into the city before the sun even managed to rise. Jeongin was probably wondering about it too, but he wasn’t going to ask about it either. What was left unsaid remained unsaid. And for now, Felix preferred to keep it this way.

Too embarrassed to admit that the real nightmare had been the sounds of moaning and banging from behind the closed door.

With a strange man occupying his kitchen after.

They remained in a silent hug for a moment, the warmth slowly soothing away the heaviness. Once again, Felix was grateful that Jeongin didn’t push, even though it pained his heart that he still wasn’t able to tell him the truth. It was like a stone in his throat, too heavy to be lifted. And Felix never dared to try, afraid that if he did so, it would simply break him.

Jeongin was first to pull back, bestowing a dimpled smile when their eyes met again.

​“You know, there’s still a lot of time before classes,” he noted, sliding his arms down to hold Felix’s hands. “Maybe you want to come over? I could make pancakes if you’d like. This one I actually can do.” He chuckled, his shoulders lifting in a small shrug.

Felix furrowed his brows in hesitation, intertwining their fingers.​ ​“Will your aunt be okay with it?”

Jeongin’s smile softened as he shook his head, a lock of hair falling onto his forehead. “Don’t worry, she’s used to my friends visiting before school. And I bet she’d love to see you again.” He squeezed Felix’s hand reassuringly, the smile now turning into a playful grin. “So, are you ready for a swing?”

Felix rolled his eyes, unable to hold back the smile that tugged at his lips, too. “Is it your excuse to hold me close? If you want to cuddle, you can just say so,” he teased, scrunching his nose.

“Hey, it’s you who always squeezes the hell out of me when I carry you, not the other way around,” Jeongin retorted with a laugh.

Felix gasped in indignation, a warm wave of pink spreading across his cheeks nonetheless. “And how else are you expecting me to act when you drag me through the city on this tiny web, huh? This is like calling for an accident.”

Another chuckle rumbled through Jeongin’s chest as he let go of his hands, just to cup his face instead and place a tender kiss on Felix’s forehead. Leading to an eruption of butterflies in the boy’s stomach. “You know I would never let that happen.”

“Yeah, I know,” Felix said, his gaze softening. He wrapped his arms around Jeongin’s neck once more, never able to get enough of the view before him. “Can I get a kiss before we go?”

With Jeongin’s hands falling back to his waist, the place where he liked them the most. 

“Mmm, I don’t know. Should I?” he teased, swaying them from side to side.

“I guess you’ll just have to find out,” Felix murmured with a mischievous glint, determined not to kiss him himself. Basking in the way Jeongin always held him so tenderly.

And the brunette finally leaned in, unable to resist.

“You’re killing me,” he groaned against his mouth, hovering there just for a moment.

Before closing the gap and claiming his lips with the warmest of sensations.

 Making Felix feel like he was already flying.

Chapter Text

Felix had been in his lap for a few minutes now, the manuals and notebooks long abandoned next to them on his bed.

Apart from working on the project, this was only the second time they had decided to study at Jeongin’s place. In most cases, their usual spot for studying after classes was the school library, which gave them more time to spend together before Felix had to catch a bus to work. Not to mention, it was much easier to avoid distractions and actually focus on the task at hand when they couldn’t mess around without being seen and scolded by the school librarian—a one-time situation that had already become an inside joke between them.

Today however, since Felix had a free afternoon, they had decided to settle at Jeongin’s place instead, as it offered much more intimacy and comfort. Jeongin had swung them all the way to his flat, convincing the boy that it was going to be much faster than taking a bus—he was still sometimes a little adamant when it came to swinging. They ate dinner together with Aunt Sohee and finally settled in Jeongin’s bedroom, supposed to study for a calculus test. Quite an important one that could heavily impact their grades for the semester—especially Felix’s, which were already hanging by a thread.

They managed to go through some exercises but soon after Jeongin found himself regretting the choice of changing their usual studying spot—because apparently, studying was the last thing his boyfriend wanted to do.

Jeongin’s lips were chapped and swollen from the way Felix kissed him. He was lying with his head on his pillows, pressed to his bed under the weight of Felix’s body, and his mouth, teeth, and tongue were giving him no mercy. It seemed like the boy wanted to explore every possible way of kissing in existence, biting, sucking and humming with contentment as he hovered over Jeongin with no intent of pulling back anytime soon. It often happened this way whenever they ended up at Jeongin’s place, and it was no different today, with Felix growing bored fast with studying and insisting on taking a break all the time. And Jeongin allowed him of course, for some reason too fond of the way his kisses were turning his brain into a marshmallow.

Not that he had complained when the boy himself had chosen to crawl into his lap and claim his lips instead of starting another Math exercise. No, Jeongin loved it all—the way his boyfriend was leading the perfect pace for their lips he could simply follow without giving it too much thought, the way his body fit so perfectly in his embrace. It was as if he couldn’t think properly whenever the boy got too close, his sole presence able to disarm him and put all his survival instincts aside. As ironic as it was, it seemed like Lee Felix was the only opponent Spider-Man wasn’t able to defeat.

Apart from the touch, Jeongin often blamed it on the sweet smell of his body that wrapped him all over whenever Felix was close. It wasn’t any different today, his perfume and lingering cosmetics overwhelming his senses all the same. With only one small addition—the taste of his kisses, today sweeter than usual.

“Goodness, did you get a new lipstick? You taste like fruit candy,” he asked in between the kisses, the taste of the boy’s lips being everything he could think of right now. His hands kept traveling between the boy’s waist and thighs, sliding or gripping depending on the way Felix kissed him.

Felix giggled against his lips, continuing to press gentle pecks. One of his hands was entangled into Jeongin’s hair, the other rested on his chest for balance. “Yeah, I thought you would like it,” he purred, before giving his lower lip a light suck. “I bought a whole set. This one’s strawberry.”

Jeongin’s heart tumbled in his chest but he tried to keep it casual. Everything about this boy just made him go crazy. “Oh, I–” a kiss, “–I like it a lot. What else’s there?”

Felix stole one last sweet kiss before pulling back with a huge grin stretching over his mouth. His cheeks were flushed red, blond hair in disorder, plump lips glistening—and all Jeongin could do was stare in awe, disarmed.

“I can give you one if you want,” the boy announced and leaned across the bed to grab his bag from the floor. Jeongin kept his hands close to his body, securing his every movement. “There were five in the set, so you can choose whichever you want.” He flipped the colorful box down and gave it a little shake to take the lip balms out. “It’s apple, cherry, peach, and watermelon. And obviously strawberry, but I’d like to keep it.”

“Sure,” Jeongin replied, his hands reluctant as they had to leave the boy’s body to take one. He twisted the product up and brought it to his nose. “Hmm, watermelon is a bit too artificial,” he said, scrunching his nose at the smell. 

“That’s what I thought. Maybe I should just give it to Jisung,” Felix joked, throwing the first lip balm back into the box.

“Yeah, I’m sure he would love it.” Jeongin rolled his eyes with a chuckle and reached for the green one. His left hand had already fallen back onto Felix’s thigh. “Oh, is it the apple flavor? I like it, what do you think?” he asked, offering it for Felix to smell. His skin prickled when the boy’s delicate fingers embraced his hand.

“Mhm, this one’s super sweet.” A mischievous glint highlighted Felix’s gaze and he leaned in, placing his hand on Jeongin’s cheek. “Want to try it on?” 

The brunette only managed to nod, overwhelmed by the proximity of the boy, about the way he looked so pretty above him. He allowed him to touch him, to do whatever he wished in fact, as he didn’t care much. He just laid there with a pounding heart, feeling everything and nothing at once. His hands happy to rest back on Felix’s thighs, the boy straddling him on both sides of his body as he leaned in to carefully apply the lipstick on his lips. He was so close that Jeongin could see every single freckle adorning his face.

“There, all done,” he announced after a while, twisting the product close. “Now it’s my turn.”

And he claimed Jeongin’s lips again, catching him off-guard as all he could do was let out a strained moan.

The combination of their lipsticks created a brand new formula, something he could compare to an apple pie in a strawberry syrup. Or a strawberry lollipop being licked after a sip of an apple juice. Whatever, none of this made much sense, but what made sense was the fact that Jeongin was absolutely losing himself in this new combination. Something he had never tasted before but felt like he could experience forever.

Felix pulled back with a smack, casting him a satisfied smirk. One that Jeongin could swear looked more and more ethereal each time he saw it. “Perfect. I think you should keep it.”

And he hated how much power that smile held over him.

They kissed, and kissed, and if Jeongin could, he would never make it stop. There was nothing more perfect and blissful than Felix’s weight against him, each one of his kisses taking him to heaven. He felt like he was floating on a cloud, his whole body surrendered to whatever Felix wished. But even in this perfect moment, a part of him was still painfully aware of his responsibilities.

Just before this kissing break happened, Felix had been so helpless, straining his brain over all those exercises that he didn’t seem to get until Jeongin explained it for another time in a row. Obviously he didn’t mind at all because every minute spent with the boy made his heart bloom, however, it made him a little worried for the outcome of the upcoming test. While they usually managed to go through other subjects without too many obstacles, Math was like an Achilles heel to Felix, it required much more time and effort. With trigonometry being for him the same obstacle as that immense boulder was for Sisyphus.

Therefore even when his lips were such a sweet delight, they weren’t enough for Jeongin to forget about the promise he’d made to help the boy with his studies. And he was going to lead him through that school year no matter what—so there was no way he would ever place his own pleasure and satisfaction anywhere before it.

With the gentlest pressure, he cupped the boy's chin and pushed it up, just enough to create some space. As soon as the contact was broken, he felt his own lips longing for the lost touch.

“Babe, I hate stopping you now but we have a test in two days,” he muttered, his other hand stroking the small of Felix’s back, his own voice breathless. A thread of saliva lingered somewhere in between, dropping only after a few heavy breaths.

Felix stared at him for a moment, gasping for oxygen. His lips were slightly parted and for a moment they were all Jeongin could focus on.

“You wanna stop?” Felix breathed out, arching an eyebrow.

A laugh escaped Jeongin, followed by an amused roll of his eyes. “It’s not that I wanna but we have to. We still have a lot left to cover.” He cast him a smile, sliding his hands along his sides up to his waist.

With a loud groan, the blond’s head fell down to rest against Jeongin’s shoulder. His breath tickled his skin when he spoke. “God, I hate Math. My brain is going to combust, I swear.”

“Hey, don’t worry, you were doing just fine.” Jeongin pressed one last kiss to his temple and slowly raised them both up, holding the boy close to his chest. “A few more exercises and you’ll become an expert.” He pressed a kiss to his cheek, and under his lips, he could feel the skin stretch into a smile. 

“Mmm, sure.” Putting his hands on his nape, Felix stroked the skin there, sending shivers down Jeongin’s spine. He pulled himself up and gave him a lazy, almost high smile that soon turned into a mischievous grin. “But you know what else I’m an expert? This.” 

And then he leaned in, attaching his lips to Jeongin’s neck this time.

Jeongin sucked in a sharp breath, almost choking on the sensation. His vision turned into a blur and this time it was much, much harder to maintain his focus.

“Oh my god, you’ll kill me,” he breathed out shakily, not even noticing the way his own neck tilted to give him better access. “Lee Felix, I swear, if you don’t– oh…”

A sharp, delightful tug of Felix’s teeth shut him up successfully. Jeongin opened his mouth wide with a gasp and every last protest died in his throat, sucked away by Felix like blood can be sucked by a vampire. The small sting turned into a shocking, exhilarating jolt, and Jeongin’s hands, which were already resting on Felix’s waist, gripped him even tighter.

While they had already kissed a lot, this was the first time one of them gave a hickey to the other. In fact, Jeongin couldn’t believe what was happening to him right now. It took everything in him to stifle the loud moan that threatened to escape his lips, a shaky gasp all he could manage. Thank god he had enough pride left not to surrender completely.

Felix looked euphoric when he pulled back, his lips glistening and overtaken by a huge, prideful smile. He bit his lower lip and stared right into his eyes with a glint, like he actually wanted him to combust. Jeongin wanted to die.

“Mhm, looks just right. I hope your spider powers won’t get rid of it too fast,” Felix giggled, appreciating the outcome of his work. His face was so flushed, and pink, and his hair disheveled that it looked almost sinful. Or Jeongin was simply going crazy, it was hard to tell. 

“God, you’re so pretty,” he murmured in awe, then squeezed his eyes shut. While he’d been ready to lose his mind from the touch, the sight of Felix made him question it all. “I love when you kiss me, but we really, really need to study.”

“I knooow, bug, I’m sorry,” Felix whined with a giggle, his fingers still giving his neck some gentle rubs. “I just like you so much,” he spoke in barely a whisper, leaning close to his face.

Jeongin’s mouth stretched in the softest of smiles. “I like you, too,” he replied, his eyes crinkling.

Their lips connected for yet another time, the touch much more gentle and thoughtful. It took another moment before they pulled away, breaking into joyful grins. “C’mon, we have calculus to do.” Jeongin patted his thigh encouragingly. “I won’t let up until we get through all those topics.”

There was a pout on Felix’s lips when he scrambled off his lap, plopping down on the bed next to him with a reluctant sigh. He brushed a strand of hair behind his ear and it was hard for Jeongin to take his eyes off him, especially when he propped himself with his arms behind in a casual posture.

“All right, let’s get this over with,” he announced with a wave of his hand. “What else do we have left?”

“Well,” Jeongin cleared his throat, turning to gather all the manuals and notebooks from where they had abandoned them across the sheets. “We first need to cover all the trigonometry exercises. I was hoping we could also try some more complex ones from geometry but I’m not sure if time allows us.”

He was flipping through the pages of the calculus manual when the boy next to him scooted closer, resting his chin on his shoulder. He nuzzled his face there for a moment, his breath spreading goosebumps all over Jeongin’s skin, then pressed a soft peck right onto the hickey.

“I’m sorry, I should have asked before I did it,” he sighed, one of his arms wrapping around Jeongin’s bicep. 

“Oh, it’s okay.” Jeongin smiled, straightening the pages to stay open as he had finally found the right one. “Unless my aunt kills me, that is,” he added with a chuckle, feeling his cheeks redden.

Felix groaned, hiding his face in the crook of Jeongin’s neck. “Oh god, and she will know that I did it.”

Jeongin’s free hand came up to gently cup the back of Felix’s head, his thumb stroking his hair. “Still, I think I’d be the one who gets killed. She’s too fond of you to blame you,” he noted with a laugh.

He resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the memory of Aunt Sohee being absolutely over the moon when her nephew had admitted to having kissed his crush. She hadn’t got all the details, just those Jeongin could share, but it still hadn’t stopped her from celebrating. She had always been so supportive since Jeongin came out to her as gay—not to mention the fact that she came out to him as bisexual, too—and when she learned that the kind and handsome school president had become his boyfriend, she couldn’t be more happy.

“Well, I don’t want you to get killed, either.” Felix breathed out a laugh and his body became an even heavier weight against his back as he interlaced his hands on his chest and leaned in to see better. “All right, where do we start?”

Soon, they drifted along with the exercises, going through every single one on the page. Felix remained glued to his body, his hair tickling his cheeks every time he shifted, his hands rubbing his arm from time to time when got the right answer. Sometimes he would ask questions, then hummed and nodded when Jeongin explained. Although he still struggled a lot and wandered into dead ends at certain points of the equations, with Jeongin’s guidance he was able to solve the first page of exercises.

 It was the word problems that brought much more struggle and effort, a place where they had to stop and focus on every step. Jeongin tried his best to explain, reaching even for metaphors and comparisons to create an image sharp enough for Felix to understand better. And he enjoyed it a lot because Math had always been something Jeongin excelled at. He liked to strain his brain over complicated equations, the feeling of getting lost in numbers. Especially that even in his everyday life, geometry and trigonometry were something he couldn’t get on without. Not when he was swinging above the city and doing parkour on the rooftops where every angle mattered.

He was half into explaining the importance of tangent function in the given exercise, when the body beside him suddenly stifled, leaning into him even more. The blond head fell on his shoulder unconsciously, and as Jeongin went silent, the air filled with soft and even breaths.

Jeongin froze, tilting his head to look at him. “Lix?”

No response. Only the breathing.

Jeongin’s movements were slow and deliberate when he shifted to support him, the calculus manual long forgotten. Steadying his head, he led the unconscious body down onto the pillows, making sure they were properly settled. He grabbed the folded blanket lying at the feet of his bed and spread it over him, tucking it for better warmth and safety. Only after did he allow himself to watch.

Something clenched at his heart. He watched his hair spread across the pillows, some strands falling onto his face. The constellation of freckles running from one cheek to the other, reaching his eyes, climbing up his nose. The curve of his eyelids, dark and swollen from the lack of sleep. And the pink of his lips, moisturized with the lip balm and reddened from all the kissing—remaining the only part there that didn’t seem blemished.

With a heavy sigh, Jeongin ran a hand through his hair, feeling a weight settle upon his chest. It was yet another time when Felix had fallen asleep during their study session, and while Jeongin had been able to explain it to himself the first time, today it was too hard to just let it pass without a second thought. Especially given that they were supposed to study for a test, an important one at that—but if Felix was going to remain asleep, it would be impossible to cover all the necessary syllabus.

Nevertheless, Jeongin once again didn’t have a heart to wake him.

He arranged all the books into a neat stack and put it on his desk, careful not to make too much noise. It wasn’t hard to see that lately Felix had been a walking zombie with all the assignments and stress they had to endure before the end of the first semester, not to mention his work and additional duties as the school president. Therefore no matter the reason, he simply wasn’t able to snap him out of that peaceful state. There was no way.

Jeongin had been craving to talk to him about it, but for some reason, Felix kept pushing that topic away every time it was brought up. And Jeongin always went along with it as making his boyfriend uncomfortable was the last thing he wanted. It didn’t mean, however, that he considered it right. Quite the contrary, he couldn’t wrap his head around the reason why Felix never wanted to talk about it. The more he watched him fall deeper into his own misery, the more hurt he grew, desperate to find a way for the boy to trust him.

A sound of a familiar notification filled the room and the screen on one of the phones placed on the desk lit up. As he was gathering the empty dishes to take them out to the kitchen, his eyes involuntarily fell on the device in a long acquired reflex. Only then realising that while the notification sounded the same, the phone wasn’t quite his.

Causing his blood to run cold when he saw the content of the text message.

eomma: don’t come home tonight

Jeongin stared at it like in a trance until the screen turned itself off. For a moment, he couldn’t move, afraid that if he did so something was going to break. He didn’t even realize that he was holding his breath until it escaped him in a shaky huff, making his whole body shutter.

Another thing that hadn’t yet made its path into their shared conversations was their parents, with neither Felix nor Jeongin ever bringing them up. Jeongin simply didn’t have much to talk about in this area as both of his parents had passed away before he could even properly meet them. Therefore he never talked about it, never feeling the need to reminisce about something that was out of his reach anyway. His aunt had always been all he ever cared about, the woman always having been there for him since a very young age, taking him under his wings and loving him endlessly even before a plane crash had taken his parents away.

Nonetheless, as far as he was concerned, Felix was living with a mother. And that was everything Jeongin knew, because apart from this simple fact, Felix never mentioned anything about either of his parents. Not that Jeongin cared about it much given his own reluctance to talk about his, but well, it wasn’t hard to notice the way his boyfriend recoiled whenever they as much as stumbled upon the topic. Not to mention that he never allowed Jeongin to come into his house, either.

The stone in his chest was growing heavier and heavier. He turned to the boy sleeping in his bed, his body curled under the blanket into a fetal position. One of his hands had clutched onto the material and only now did Jeongin notice a small burn mark he must have gotten at work. He wondered why he hadn’t noticed it earlier and the thought made his heart sting.

Forgetting about the dishes, he stumbled closer to the bed, falling to his knees on the floor next to Felix. His eyebrows were furrowed when he leaned closer, watching the boy with pain striking at his heart. He took his hand into his grasp and intertwined their fingers, then pressed a kiss to the burnt skin. There was no way Felix was going to leave this house for the night. No way in hell.

The door of his bedroom closed with a click behind him when he walked out, carrying a set of empty dishes in one arm. The rest of the apartment was cloaked in a warm, orange glow of the lamps, a nice combination with the wooden furniture and warm colour of the walls. There was not much natural light entering through the windows at this hour, so his aunt must have switched the lamps on already.

She was in the kitchen when he entered, pouring some soup into glass jars settled on the countertop. She spared him a glance with her usual smile—which then dropped at once when she noticed his sulky expression.

“Innie? What happened?” she asked, drawing her eyebrows together.

Jeongin arranged the dirty dishes on the countertop next to the sink and reached for a sponge. “Lix fell asleep. Again.” 

Aunt Sohee’s eyebrows shot all the way up. “How come, again? How much does this boy sleep?”

Jeongin turned around to make sure the door of his bedroom was closed, then threw the sponge back into the sink and propped his hands against it. “I don’t know, auntie, something’s really wrong. I think… I think he has some troubles at home.” He dropped his head down with a heavy sigh.

The woman tightened up the lid of the last jar and came to stand behind him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “What makes you say that, honey?” she asked, her voice soft and concerned.

He bit his lip, eyes darting from side to side as he tried to put all the pieces together. He hesitated, unsure if he was allowed to share, but soon realized that if he was allowed to tell anyone, then it would only be his aunt. Not anyone else.

“I don’t know much, he never talks about his parents. But it seems like he can’t get enough sleep there. And there was this, um. The text.” He squeezed his eyes close for a brief internal battle, debating whether to say it or not.

Aunt Sohee gave his shoulder a reassuring rub. “What text?”

“His mother texted him a while ago. For him not to come home tonight.” He let out a heavy sigh and looked at the woman with concern. “This isn’t normal, is it?”

“Not at all, no.” The woman shook her head, squeezing the bridge of her nose between her thumb and index finger. “Goodness, this poor boy.”

“And I don’t know what to do, he never wants to talk about it,” he whined in a hushed voice, feeling all the stress and worry that he had held to himself finally breaking free. “I hate to see him like this so much.”

“Oh boy, you like him so much, don’t you?” Aunt Sohee pulled him closer to her chest and pressed a kiss to his temple. “Does he know you’ve read that text?”

“No, he was asleep already. He hasn’t seen it yet.” He hugged the woman back, allowing himself to be caressed. “Would you mind if he stayed here for the night? I’m not sure he has anywhere else to go.”

His heart clenched at the sole thought of the boy wandering alone around the city, too scared to ask anyone for help. He had no doubt the boy wouldn’t tell anyone, not even his friends about it. For some reason, his family and home remained his most guarded secret—and Jeongin had a feeling that he was slowly understanding why.

“Not at all,” she replied, moving her hand through his hair. “It’s the best if he stays here for tonight, I heard there might be a thunderstorm again.”

Feeling a wave of relief washing over him, he hugged her tighter. “Thanks, auntie, you’re the best.”

“It’s all we can do for him, I suppose.” The woman sighed and pulled back, moving her hand up to cup his face, thumbs brushing his cheeks. “Give him some soup when he wakes up, there’s still some left in the pot. You can eat it together for dinner.”

“Are you going somewhere?” Jeongin arched an eyebrow.

A smile stretched across her face as she waved her hand around her head pointedly. “Of course, can’t you see I did my hair?”

He must have been too lost in thoughts about Felix’s situation to care about anything else, he reckoned. Aunt Sohee in fact had her hair done, very beautifully so, curled into romantic waves. He spotted some light make up, too, and long, silver earrings dangling from her ears.

He crooked an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, it’s not my fault you look beautiful all the time, auntie.”

The woman rolled her eyes although the smile was still there. She smacked his arm playfully. “All men are blind and you’re not an exception. Anyways, I’m going out with the girls soon and I’ll come back late. I hope you don’t need me, do you?”

Grinning widely, Jeongin pecked her cheek. “No, auntie, all I need you to do is to have fun. Where are you going, anyway?”

“Oh, Yeongseo got us tickets to the opera house. A philharmonic orchestra, so I need to look good.” She tapped his shoulders pointedly and strode away in wide, confident steps, waving for him to join. “C’mon, you need to help me choose an outfit!”

About half an hour had passed before Aunt Sohee was ready to leave, dressed in a beautiful emerald dress Jeongin had chosen. After a few more adjustments to her hairstyle and a hectic search for an umbrella, she kissed him on top of his head one last time and left, leaving the boy alone at the flat.

Where, as a matter of fact, he wasn’t alone. Felix was still there, snoring in his bedroom under a blanket—but Jeongin wasn’t planning on waking him up soon. Studying could wait and besides, it wouldn’t make much of a difference anyway when the boy’s brain was too exhausted to learn new things.

Jeongin washed the rest of the dishes, cleaned the countertop, then put some random things scattered across the flat back into their place, and finally settled on the couch in front of the TV. He turned some anime on, keeping the volume low, although his mind wasn’t really paying attention. With his fingers fidgeting on his lap and one knee jerking up and down, his thoughts again drifted to the boy in his bedroom.

He was just so, so worried. Because who in their right mind texted such things to their own children? Jeongin knew abusive parents existed, of course he knew, but it didn’t mean he was going to accept that. Felix didn’t deserve such treatment, he didn’t deserve to be kicked out from his own home. Jeongin couldn’t bear seeing him like this, so pale and exhausted, with those dark circles under his eyes and hollows in his cheeks. He knew it must have been going on for a long time now, as all the pieces of the puzzle indicated that while Felix played perfect at school, there had always been something darker lurking underneath.

They needed to talk about it as soon as possible. Because god knew what else could happen if they didn’t.

Searching for clues as it always did, his brain soon reached into his memories, bringing back their encounter with—oh, what was even the name of that bastard—ah yes, with Seongje. Blood boiled in his veins at the sole thought of him, the need to shut his stupid mouth with a punch stronger than ever. Jeongin had never felt such rage before, not even towards criminals he fought on a daily basis. Seongje was a person he just couldn’t stand from the first sight. No, wait, it wasn’t just about not standing him. It was about pure loathing.

There had to be a connection between this whole situation and that guy. Jeongin had realized it the moment he heard Seongje bring it up, with only his own rage stopping him from diving deeper into conclusions. But as he thought about it now, the more he waited for Felix to wake up, the more terrifying scenarios his brain was able to conjure. His heart and stomach both twisted when he wondered about that text message, about the insult Seongje had spilled out about Felix and his mother—which also made him crave to go back in time and break the guy’s jaw. 

It disturbed him even more when he realized how scared Felix appeared in front of that boy. Jeongin had never asked after that situation, too afraid of entering yet another area that appeared too hard for Felix to talk about. Especially given that it caused tension not only around him, but also among his friends. Of course, Jeongin had discussed it thoroughly with Seungmin and Jisung, but neither of them had any idea what it was all about. All they had managed to conclude was the obvious fact that there was some conflict between Hyunjin and Seongje, causing them all to just hate each other, including those who were close to them. But the reason for Seongje to insult Felix so much remained a matter none of them were able to discover—and definitely too much for Jeongin to ask Felix directly about it.

So, as it happened to the majority of heavy topics, it was another matter they hadn’t discussed. Therefore Jeongin had no means of knowing what the words really meant—he could only assume. But he didn’t like his own assumptions, either. The reminder of them bringing his thoughts into a vicious spiral that circled on and on around that text message. It was like a dagger in his mind now, scraping patterns and images that Jeongin was barely able to look at.

Another episode of the anime was playing when Felix finally emerged from his bedroom. Jeongin turned around as soon as he heard the light padding of feet and the click of the door. The storm roaming his mind instantly calmed as he forced a gentle smile, scrambling to his feet.

“Hi, Lixie, did I wake you up?” he asked in a rushed voice, his gaze flicking to the TV to make sure it wasn’t playing too loud. His heart was beating so much faster after getting lost in his thoughts that now he wasn’t sure if seeing Felix awake was making him more relieved or anxious.

“No! It’s not…” Felix rubbed his eyes with the back of a hand, his shoulders slumping as he slowly blinked himself back to consciousness. “How long was I asleep?”

Jeongin moved to stand by his side, resting a hand on the boy’s back. His body was much warmer after the nap, and so, so soft. “A little over an hour, I think. Are you feeling any better now?” His eyebrows furrowed involuntarily as he continued to stroke his back.

​“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep again,” the boy mumbled, hiding his face in the crook of Jeongin’s neck. His hands moved to wrap around his torso, his fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt. “I know we were supposed to study.” He sniffled, his nose probably stuffy after the nap.

Jeongin’s arms came around him at once, pulling him into a tight, comforting hug. “It’s okay, baby. I know you were tired,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to his temple.

So much warmth spread through his heart as he watched him, so confused and dazed after the slumber. His hair was a little ruffled, his clothes wrinkled, and Jeongin felt like he was falling more and more in love with every part of him. Even despite all his worries, the simple proximity was enough to make his heart swell. 

Felix wiggled out of the embrace just to look him in the eye, his voice weak and hoarse. “Are you not mad? We fell behind on our revision because of me,” he asked, his stare strong as if already searching for answers.

The question surprised Jeongin to the point something clenched in his gut as he could barely grasp what he was even supposed to be mad about. Screw that stupid test, he could never feel angry at Felix for falling asleep, it wasn’t something the boy could even control after all. It concerned him at most that he was so exhausted that he wasn’t able to stay awake for a few hours, and maybe he also felt some resentment towards himself for letting them kiss so much instead of saving energy for studying, but that was all. He had never even thought about blaming it on Felix.

​“Mad? No, never,” Jeongin said, giving him a soothing smile. “It’s not your fault you were tired.” 

He reached out, his fingers gently brushing a loose strand of hair behind Felix’s ear. His gaze lingered on the sleeping marks creasing the skin of his cheeks, which seemed to make his pimples all the more prominent. It made him look so exhausted but also so cute, that Jeongin felt a need to feel him close again.

He tilted his head, a fond grin stretching across his mouth. “But I was a bit lonely, so, you know, a kiss might make up for it.”

With that, he finally managed to bring back that sunshine smile. He rested his hands on Felix’s neck and watched with a goofy grin, waiting. Because the blond’s face had immediately lightened, with something close to relief shimmering in his eyes when he exhaled.

​“Mmm, if you say so,” Felix murmured as he slid his hands up his chest. The sole movement spread fire across Jeongin’s skin. “I guess I owe you one.”

Resting his palms on Jeongin’s shoulders, Felix brought their lips together, his palms sliding up and slowly curling into his hair. This time, the kiss was slow and deliberate, the movements lazy with no intention of rush. And Jeongin could swear that every next kiss felt better than the last, with this one unlocking a new sense of warmth and comfort.

 His own hands traveled all the way down to Felix’s waist now, pulling him closer to his chest and feeling the warmth of his skin through his shirt. Everything about Felix felt so soft and lovely, and Jeongin couldn’t help but bask in the feeling. His hands remained firm on Felix’s waist as he shifted, leaving a trail of soft pecks along his jaw, then one more on his cheek. He adored the sensation of his soft skin under his lips. 

“Have you rested enough now?” Jeongin asked, leaning back to look at him with concern. “I don’t want to push your limits.”

Felix stepped away and nodded with a sigh, one of his hands staying on Jeongin’s arm. “I’m fine. But I need to study no matter what.” He ran his fingers through his locks and sighed. “I can’t fail this test.”

Joengin’s hand immediately followed, his fingers combing through the boy’s hair and massaging the scalp. “Of course, baby, then we’ll study. But maybe you’d like to eat something first, hm?” he suggested, casting him a soft smile.

“Yes, please. My stomach is calling,” Felix chuckled, his cheeks a little flushed. He cast Jeongin a shy glance, before rolling back to cuddle in his chest, bringing Jeongin to wrap his arms back around his shoulders. “I’m sorry I fell asleep. I really didn’t mean to.”

Jeongin rubbed his shoulder, swaying them both from side to side. “It’s okay, don’t think too much about it.” Keeping his hands on his body, he gently guided him towards the couch, helping him to sit down. “C’mon, you can sit here and wait. I’ll make you some soup.” He placed one last kiss on his forehead and finally walked off to the kitchen, casting him a fond smile on the way.

Putting a pot on the gas stove, he wondered if the boy had already checked his phone.  He didn’t think so though, as it seemed he had come looking for Jeongin first. Jeongin hadn’t asked him yet if he wanted to stay for the night, unwilling to destroy the comfort of the moment they had shared. First, he needed him to fully wake up, taking one step at a time. Besides, there was no need to rush, and the longer Felix stayed calm, the better.

He glanced at the boy over his shoulder and uneasiness clutched him one more time when he saw his worried expression. There was no smile anymore, just eyes open a bit too wide as he stared at the TV screen in a similar position as Jeongin had before. His right knee was jittering and one hand rubbed nervously against his thigh, the movements so repetitive and his gaze so absent that it gave an impression as if the boy had completely zoned off. He must still be feeling guilty about his tired state, even despite Jeognin’s reassurance that it was not a problem at all. Jeongin rubbed his forehead and turned to turn on the gas, feeling like he was going to break if he watched him a moment longer.

He walked back to him once the soup was cooking, coming round the couch just to lean over the backrest.

“Hey,” he began softly, watching the side of his face. “I was thinking, maybe you should stay here for the night, hm? This way we’ll have more time to study.”

Felix hesitated, the hand stopping on his thigh as he turned his head to give him a doubtful look. “Are– Are you sure? I don’t want to impose.”

Jeongin couldn’t help but breathe out a laugh, his head hanging down to suppress it. Of course he was going to say that. “You’re not imposing, Lix. It’s me who asked, after all.” He crossed his arms where he was still resting on the backrest and rubbed his shoulders in a hesitant gesture. “I dunno, I just thought it would be more efficient if you stayed here. What do you think?”

Felix’s hands clasped together, sliding in between his jittering knees as he bit his lip. “How about your aunt, is she okay with it?” His eyes skimmed around the apartment. “Where is she, anyway?”

“Oh, she went out to the opera with her friends, she’s coming back later,” Jeongin explained, rubbing the side of his neck. For some reason, this talk was making him nervous. “I already talked to her, she said you can stay.”

Felix slowly nodded, his hands finally resting on top of his thighs. “I’ll need to text my mom first but I think it’s gonna be fine.” His thumb brushed under his nose in a quick, nervous move before he stood up from the couch.

That’s when Jeongin’s heart broke into a million pieces but he didn’t let it show. He just offered an approving nod and walked back into the kitchen. As he stirred the soup in the pot, waiting for what was inevitable, he could already feel a bile growing in his throat. 

Felix’s steps were slow and hesitant when he walked back into the living room. He was staring at the screen of his phone with knitted eyebrows, moving slowly until he stopped behind the couch, finally looking up to Jeongin.

“Hey, Ayen? Have you gone through my phone?” he asked, voice a bit hesitant. His eyes were locked on Jeongin, although his shoulders slumped as if unsure.

Jeongin pushed himself off the countertop where his hands were resting, already feeling a stir in his stomach. “No, I haven’t. Why?” His eyebrows arched as he ran a hand through his hair.

Felix’s one hand wrapped around the wrist of the one holding his phone, rubbing it nervously. His eyes flickered to the floor, his face crumpled, and Jeongin could swear he was holding back his tears. “I, uh—” he waved his hand, mouth opening and closing. “But did you, did you see—”

Resting against the countertop, Jeongin rubbed a hand down his face, unable to hold it anymore. “Yes, Lix, I saw the message. It popped up when I was cleaning the desk,” he explained, crossing his arms on his chest. He chewed on the inside of his mouth, trying his best to stay calm.

Felix stood there frozen, staring at the floor. His hand was still rubbing his wrist and it seemed like the skin there was turning red already.

Jeongin turned around to give the soup a quick stir before walking up to the boy with a worried expression, feeling his heart clench in his chest. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. I would never go through your things, you know that, right? I swear, I didn’t look on purpose.” 

Felix finally snapped out of his own head, squeezing his eyes and running a hand down his face. “I know, I’m sorry.” His shoulders slumped even more as he looked at Jeongin with shimmers in his eyes. “But that’s why you asked, right? For me to stay,” he insisted, his voice weak.

Jeongin took a careful step forward, reaching out to separate the boy’s hands. He intertwined his fingers with the one that wasn’t holding the phone.

“What would you do if I didn’t ask Lix? Would you have asked me?” He knitted his eyebrows even though he already knew the answer. When Felix didn’t respond, he squeezed his eyes in defeat. “I won’t ever push you, Lix. But please,” he opened his eyes and cupped his face in between his hands, thumbs rubbing across the freckled cheeks. “At least let me help you when you need it, all right? Because, fuck, I know you wouldn’t have asked. And what would you do then, Felix, hm?” His voice dropped, he let out a sigh. “There might be a thunderstorm tonight.”

Felix was still frozen, staring at the floor now and holding back tears. The tension in the room hung heavy and Jeongin knew his words must have been too much, but at the same time, they just had to be said. He already treated the boy like porcelain but he couldn’t keep doing it forever. Not when it came to something like this.

“Let’s eat now, okay? Then we’ll study and tomorrow I’ll swing us to school. Is that okay?” He stared into his eyes, waiting for a response. The boy just nodded his head, his throat gulping, but for Jeongin it was enough. He pressed a kiss to his forehead and brushed his hair back. “C’mon, sit by the table. The food’s almost ready.”

The room grew thicker when Jeongin turned to pour the soup inside the bowls. For a moment, the only sounds were the clicking of dishes and the shuffle of Felix settling by the table, where he waited with his hands intertwined and a jittering knee again. Jeongin cast him a glance as he settled the bowls carefully on the table, then plopped down on the seat across from him. Felix murmured soft words of thanks and started eating, both of them filling the room with nothing more than the soft clinking of their chopsticks against the ceramic.

​“So,” Jeongin spoke up, stirring the contents of his bowl as he gave him a gentle look. “How about we study here now? The lighting will be better, I think.”

​Swallowing a spoonful, Felix nodded. “Sure, we can stay here. It’s cozy.”

A genuine smile graced Jeongin’s lips. “All right. We’ll go through all the exercises and then try the hardest ones again. Okay?”

“Okay,” Felix approved, his lips curling up ever so slightly.

Once they both finished, Jeongin grabbed the empty bowls from the table and brought them to the sink. The tension lingered in the air as he scrubbed them clean, the boy behind him not really moving away from the table, apart from some nervous shifting on the chair.

“Lix, can you dry the dishes for me and put them on the shelf?” Jeongin asked, deciding it was a good idea to keep the boy busy. Otherwise he was probably going to get lost in his mind—and there must have been a lot to get lost in.

Felix moved from his seat immediately and stood by his side, taking the dishes one by one to dry them. He remained silent though, his head hung, and Jeongin could hear his excessive breathing. Goodness, he wished he could enter his brain and rip apart every negative thought he would find there.

“Okay, all done.” Jeongin tried to keep his voice cheerful as he shook the water off his hands before drying them in a towel. “I’ll bring our books now, you can wait for me by the table.” He gave Felix’s shoulder another reassuring rub before disappearing in his bedroom.

When he came back, Felix still appeared distressed, his face hidden in his hands as his fingers rubbed back and forth across his eyebrows. He only stopped when Jeongin entered, exhaling deeply through his nose and blinking hard, his arms stretching over the table.

“You’re still sleepy, huh?” Jeongin asked in a light voice, casting him a smile.

As if on cue, his mouth stretched in a yawn, the gesture so unexpected that it made them both laugh.

“Oh, right, sorry,” Felix chuckled, hiding his mouth behind his hand in embarrassment. “It’s hard to get back to reality after naps.”

“Yeah, I know. They can be deadly,” Jeongin smiled, sliding back down onto a chair and reaching for the coursebook. “This time you’ll do the exercises, okay? It will be easier for you to get a grasp of it.”

“Sure. I guess that’s what I deserve after falling asleep,” the boy noted, running a hand through his hair.

“Don’t worry about that.” Jeongin cast him a reassuring look before sliding the book towards him. “All right, let’s start with this page.” He tapped it with his finger and leaned closer over the table, crossing his arms. “It’s the same topic as before so it should be easier.” 

Felix grabbed a pen and a notebook to write the equations, before looking down at the book. “Mhm, this one. Okay.” He shifted in his chair with a sigh and ruffled his hair again.

“You can read it out loud if it helps,” Jeongin suggested, waiting patiently.

“Right, okay.” Felix nodded, spinning the pen between his fingers. He cleared his throat and began with the first exercise. “Find the angle of least positive measure that is coterminal with an angle of 792 degrees.”

Jeongin waited a few seconds before he chimed in. “So. Remember what coterminal angles were?” he asked, keeping his voice light.

Felix bit the end of his pen, casting him an unsure glance. Jeongin wanted to kiss him. “Um… They land on the same spot on a circle, right?”

The brunette gave him an encouraging smile. “Yeah, they are two angles that have the same initial side and the same terminal side, they must differ in amounts of rotation. So, where does it lead us?”

Felix chewed on the pen, staring at the blank page of his notebook. His knee was jittering like crazy. “Uh…”

Well, this was going to be a long evening.

Jeongin’s arms separated as he gestured, trying to explain. “One more time. We’re looking for an angle that is the smallest positive number, right? Then we just need to get it between 0 and 360 degrees.”

The boy didn’t seem convinced, furrowing his eyebrows. “Yeah, but how? Should I divide it or something?”

Jeongin shook his head. “Not divide, but subtract. That’s the easiest way here. You have to subtract 360 degrees because the angle has a higher measure. 360 is a full rotation.”

Felix nodded and scribbled something down for a moment. “All right, I’ve got 432.”

“Mhm, and?” Jeongin asked but the blond didn’t reply, just gave him a shy smile and an apologetic stare. Jeongin snorted out a laugh and shook his head. “You need to subtract it once again, babe. It’s still over 360.”

“Ah…” Felix’s mouth opened slightly at the realization and he leaned forward to count it one more time. “So… The answer is 72 degrees, right?” he asked.

“Perfect,” Jeongin replied, casting him a smile. He rested his chin in his hand, looking at Felix with an amused glint in his eyes as he tapped the next exercise. “Let’s continue, shall we? There’s still a long way to go.”

It took some time for Felix to understand the major concepts enough to move to more complicated exercises. They slowly became longer and more complex, and most of them called for a step-by-step explanation from Jeongin, but soon Felix started making his own conclusions. Jeongin moved to make them some tea in the meantime, shuffling around the kitchen and giving him advice even as he poured water into the kettle. But it was fine. Most of all, it made him feel comfortable. As if nothing else really mattered, just the two of them and the math equations.

“I can’t believe we went through all of them already,” Jeongin commented when Felix managed to resolve the last exercise from the topic.

​The page was filled with messy scribbles, erased marks, but finally, a neatly circled number. Felix beamed, happy to get another one correct. “Crazy, right? I feel like I actually understand it now,” he chirped, grinning widely.

“Well, that was the goal,” Jeongin chuckled, stretching his arms up. His muscles were stiff from sitting so long in one position. “All right, but we’re not done yet,” he said, reaching for another math manual. “I need you to do the revision exercises now, then we’ll try some more complex ones. They will be useful for the CSAT.”

Felix dragged one hand down his face, visibly tired, but he didn’t protest. “Okay, sure. Do you think it will be enough for me to pass the test?” He looked at Jeongin and scrunched his nose, uncertain.

​“You’ll ace it, for sure. But I’ll give you the most important problems to practice tomorrow, just in case.” He finally found the right page in the new book and slid it towards Felix. “All right, these are the revision exercises. Try to do them now, okay?”

​“Mhm, they look quite similar,” Felix observed, already tracing the first equation with his pen.

​“Yes, so you’ll get them in no time,” Jeongin chirped, standing up from his chair. “I’ll go and take a quick shower now, okay?” He walked to Felix’s side and bent down to press a soft kiss to his head. “I’ll be right back.”

The shower he took must have been one of the quickest in his life, desperate to go back to Felix fast just in case he needed help with anything. He still made sure not to skip any steps though. He spread his body fragranced lotion diligently and put some oil onto his hair, taking his time there just to make sure it wasn’t sticking out in every possible direction. The pajamas were also fresh and clean, a loose Star-Wars t-shirt and a pair of black shorts. Even though he indeed had the matching pants for the top of the pajamas, well, tonight didn’t exactly feel like the right moment to parade in pants decorated all over with the pattern of Darth Vader’s head.

Felix was still focused on the exercises when he returned, chewing on his lip in concentration and moving his pen across the page. Jeongin used the moment to slip back into his bedroom, straightening the duvet on his bed and setting out a fresh set of clothes for Felix. Only then did he return to the living room, sliding back into his chair with two glasses of water, careful not to distract him.

​“Just two more and I’m done,” Felix announced, not even sparing a glance. After a few minutes, he moved his head up with a grin, sliding his notebook for Jeongin to check. “Here, all done.”

​Jeongin shifted in his chair, leaning forward to examine Felix’s work. His eyes quickly skimmed over every equation, not missing a single formula, before he nodded in approval. He finally looked up at Felix, a smile gracing his lips. “Well, I’m afraid my help isn’t needed anymore.” He gestured to the notebook with a sigh. “My Padawan has become a Jedi.”

​Felix froze, his eyebrows arching in disbelief. “Wait, what? Everything’s correct?”

​“Every single one.” Jeongin leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest with a proud smile. “Ready for the advanced ones? We’ll try just a few of the most important ones and we can call it a night.”

​“Fine, let’s do this. I’m ready.” Felix gave a firm nod, opening his notebook on another clean page. He shook his head with a grin, waiting for Jeongin to find the final exercises. “I can’t believe I actually understand math.”

​Jeongin glanced at him with a smile. “Of course you do.” He placed the book in the center of the table and straightened the pages. “All right, let’s try these. A bit more tricky but it’s good to learn how to handle them, too.”

​Felix’s eyes widened at the sight of the final problems. He scratched his head with an apologetic smile. “Oh, they’re… long,” he laughed.

Jeongin chuckled and waved his hand in a reassuring gesture. “Don’t worry, I’ll guide you. Look…”

And with him explaining the intricate rules and hidden nuances lying underneath, together they managed to work their way through the whole page. Fortunately, Felix didn’t seem overwhelmed. Quite the contrary, he listened carefully and tried to introduce his own ideas.

It still managed to exhaust them, though. Especially Felix who leaned back in his chair as soon as they were done, dragging his hands down his face with a groan.

“Oh my god, finally,” he said, rubbing his tired eyes before yawning widely. “I feel like my brain’s got five times bigger.”

Jeongin chuckled, already standing up from his chair to clean up the table from all the books and papers they had scattered across.

“It did for sure. And you’ll nail that test with no doubt,” he replied, tapping the sheets against the table to put them into an even pile. “Would you like to eat anything before sleep? I can make some instant ramyeon.”

“Oh, I’d love that.” Felix stood up as well, helping him to take the books off the table. “Would you mind if I take a shower? I’m just feeling so sticky.” He breathed out a laugh.

“Yes, of course, c’mon,” Jeongin replied with an eager nod, leading them both into his bedroom. “I’ll give you some clothes for change. Do you prefer a T-shirt or a hoodie?” he asked, setting the book and papers down on his desk and grabbing the clothes he’d already prepared.

“A T-shirt works just fine, I think,” Felix said, a pink blush spreading over his cheeks as he took the clothes from him. “Thank you.”

Jeongin just put one hand on the back of his head, caressing the blond strands as he led them back into the living room. “All right, I’ll give you a towel. And…” he stopped in front of a shelf in the kitchen, taking out an unopened toothbrush. “I have a new toothbrush, too, but you need to wait until I rinse it with hot water.”

He moved around the flat quickly, grabbing all the necessary things, while Felix just stood there, astounded. His cheeks were still pink when Jeongin turned back to him, eyes opened a tad wider. 

“Are you going to wash your hair today?” he asked as he finally stepped back to him, handing him the towel.

Felix blinked, taking a second to snap back to reality. “Oh, yeah. Today.”

“Good, then I’ll show you.” Jeongin grabbed the boy’s hand and led them to the bathroom. Felix followed him without a word.

“Here, this is my aunt’s conditioner for bleached hair if you’d like.” Jeongin took a bottle out of a shelf, one that his aunt had bought someday but didn’t really use. “I don’t think we have special shampoo but you can use whatever.” He waved his hand towards the other products settled under the shower shelf, then scratched his head as he looked around, wondering what else to remember. “Basically, you can just use whatever you want.” He shrugged in defeat.

Felix stared at him in surprise. Then his expression softened and he leaned in to peck his lips, catching him off-guard. “You’re unbelievable,” he said with a giggle, a glint in his eyes.

Jeongin felt a blush spreading all over his body before his smile softened. He tugged the boy closer to his chest and pressed a kiss to his temple, rubbing his shoulder reassuringly. “Just tell me if you need anything else, okay? I’ll be in the kitchen.”

Giddiness filled him only when the boy disappeared in the bathroom. The reality hit him then that they were about to spend the night together, and even though the boy had already fallen asleep in his bed a few times, somehow this felt like a whole new ballgame.

His hands were shaking and his moves were a bit too fast than necessary as he prepared the noodles, his mind drifting everywhere but to the actual countertop in the kitchen. They still hadn’t approached the elephant in the room, which was the topic of his mother, and Jeongin wondered if it was still going to happen tonight. He still didn’t want to push, but at the same time, he didn’t think he was going to handle it if something like this happened again behind his back. As much as he trusted Felix, he couldn’t be sure if the boy was going to ask him for help when needed. The issue had been sitting too deep and for way too long to be resolved just with a simple wave of a hand. So pleasant or not, the talk needed to happen.

The flat smelled like orchid and vanilla as soon as Felix returned, his hair damp and cheeks reddened from the shower. And Jeongin’s heart skipped a beat when he saw him in his clothes, the gray sweatpants and the T-shirt too loose on him, making him look so comfortable that Jeongin wanted to hug him instantly. 

“I borrowed some of your body lotion, I hope you don’t mind.” The boy chuckled, adjusting his damp hair and pattering towards Jeongin’s room to put his clothes away.

“Smells nice, doesn’t it? I found it on sale in a supermarket recently and it’s better than I expected,” he said, turning around to place the steaming bowls with ramyeon on the table, just in time when Felix returned.

“Yeah, but this smells even better.” He grinned and reached out for chopsticks. “I know we ate already, but shit, I’m so hungry.”

“We’ve done a lot of studying so your body needs fuel. Eat up,” Jeongin said, digging into his own bowl.

“So, your aunt’s gone to the opera?” Felix asked after a few bites, quirking his eyebrows.

Jeongin nodded, swallowing the food. “Yeah, a philharmony concert. Her friend works at the venue and she gets discounts on tickets sometimes.”

“That’s cool. I’ve never attended something like that,” Felix said after a thought.

“I have once,” Jeongin replied. “She took me when they were playing music from Star-Wars.”

Felix giggled, casting him an amused look. “Of course it was Star-Wars.” He stared at his plate for a moment, corners of his mouth quivering before he looked up again. “You know, we should watch it together sometime.”

Jeongin’s heart melted at the suggestion but he didn’t let it steal his reasoning. “Sure, but not tonight. You need to rest properly first.” He pointed his chopsticks at him threateningly. “You’re not leaving that bed until it’s 7AM, I swear.”

Felix  drew his eyebrows together in question. “7AM? We have classes at 8.”

Chewing his food, the brunette gave a dismissive wave with his hand. “Don’t worry, I’ll swing us. It will be faster.”

Felix rolled his eyes, his gaze fond. “Right. I forgot you’re half a bug.”

The clock indicated half past 10PM when they finished eating. This time Felix was the one to grab the empty bowls from the table, sticking his tongue out when Jeongin protested and moving quickly towards the sink before he could catch him.

“Yeez, let me help you this one time,” he argued when Jeongin approached him from behind, turning his back to shield him from reaching the sink.

“You’re my guest, Lix, you don’t need to clean up,” he said, putting one hand on his waist and grabbing a wiper with another. “Let me dry them at least.”

He stayed behind him even after they finished, wrapping his arms around his belly and pulling him closer. His heart fluttered as he nuzzled his face in the boy’s neck, enjoying the smell of his skin.

“Gosh, did you really use the same products as me? I swear, you smell so much better,” he murmured, pressing a short kiss.

The gesture made Felix giggle as he leaned back into his chest, touching his hands with his own. “They are the same, your nose probably just got adjusted to your own smell. So you feel them better on me,” he explained.

“What a pity.” A pleasant wave overwhelmed his body as he leaned closer, leaving a peck after peck on his neck. “Now I have to keep you close.”

The kisses tickled Felix’s skin as he erupted into laughter, his cheeks and neck growing red and hot from the touch. “Oh my god, you’re crazy.”

“You make me crazy,” Jeongin beamed and pressed one last kiss to his cheek, before leading him towards the bathroom. “C’mon, let’s brush our teeth and get some sleep. You must be tired.”

Felix was flushed red as he followed, wrapping his arms around Jeongin’s torso and snuggling closer. “Thank you for letting me stay,” he mumbled.

And Jeongin couldn’t help but kiss his head again. “Always.”

Somehow brushing their teeth together in front of the bathroom mirror felt more intimate than all the touches could. Jeongin could barely hold his gaze in the reflection, blushing bright red every time their eyes met and dropping them to the floor with a giggle. The only thing that comforted him was the fact that Felix reacted the same way.

They stayed incredibly close for the whole way back to his bedroom, their fingers intertwining somewhere on the way. He let Felix step inside first, making sure the lights in other rooms were off, before he followed, only then hesitating about this whole situation.

His cheeks burned red when he realized they were going to sleep together, the sole thought making his stomach jump backflips. He couldn’t even handle why his body was reacting this way, especially since Felix resting in his bed was nothing new by now, yet it still made his brain malfunction. Maybe it was just because, after all—he was still just a loser. And being a loser didn’t make it easy when pretty boys entered the scene.

Jeongin stopped somewhere in between the door and his bed, hesitating. Suddenly the room was too cramped, his bed too small, and it felt like he was still forgetting about something, determined to make Felix feel comfortable and at ease. His gaze fell on the duvet and suddenly a storm of thoughts hit him, filling him with doubts whether he should offer Felix an alternative or not.

“I, um– would you like a separate blanket or something? Or wait, no, you take the duvet, or maybe I’ll just stay in the living room so–” Words spilled out of him in a nervous babble but Felix was quick to stop him.

“Maybe we can just share? I don’t mind.” He cast him a sweet, shy smile, scratching his forearm. “You make it easier to fall asleep.”

Jeongin’s brain glitched and something flipped in his stomach. He went silent for a moment, his mouth probably hanging open, before words spilled out again. “Oh, yeah, sure, of course. However you wish,” he breathed out.

He scratched his head nervously, still standing on his feet. Then he took a step back and made an uneven gesture, trying to show everything at once. “Wait, actually, you can lie down and I’ll go bring us some water, just in case.”

 “All right,” Felix replied, his cheeks red as he made small steps towards the bed and pulled off the duvet.

Jeongin disappeared back into the main room, hiding his face in his hands and groaning at his own awkwardness. He wanted to bang his head against the wall because why, god, oh why did he have to be so weird about this? It was just a sleepover and he needed to get a grip. Touch some grass or whatever. Maybe even do yoga. Or just become a monk right away, literally anything. Dear gods in heavens, maybe he should just seek some professional help.

Felix was already lying under the covers when he walked back with two glasses of water. The boy was tapping something on his phone but he glanced up as soon as Jeongin entered. He reached across the bed to flicker the bedside lamp on, allowing Jeongin to turn off the main one, and opened the duvet for him to settle beside him, sliding closer to the wall to create more space.

“I set an alarm for 6:50 o’clock. Just in case we need more time to get ready,” he announced as Jeongin crawled onto the bed.

 “Fine, I guess I’ll survive it.” Ignoring the butterflies in his stomach, Jeongin settled next to him, impossibly close due to the size of his bed, and pulled the covers over them both. “But ten minutes, not more. I want you to rest,” he added, resting his head on the pillows.

Felix switched off his phone and gave it to him to put it on the nightstand, before curling up into his chest. Jeongin’s arms moved automatically as they wrapped around him and pulled closer, both of them shifting a little to make themselves comfortable.

Felix nuzzled his head in the material of his shirt, his left arm resting softly on Jeongin’s belly. For a moment, they laid just like that and breathed, with his left hand caressing Felix’s hair while the fingers of the right one drew little circles on his left shoulder. Jeongin breathed in the lingering scent of the lotion mixed with the hair conditioner, and he could swear the products somehow smelled better on Felix than on him. But as long as he was allowed to hug him, he didn’t really mind.

“Do you have any things to do tomorrow?” he asked casually, enjoying this little moment of comfort. 

Felix hummed, taking his time before he answered. “Mmm, I have a shift after school. But it’s a few hours after, so I’ll still have some time to study.” He spoke in a soft voice, his eyes staring into the space of the room. “And I have to see Mr. Cheung in between classes, he wanted to talk about something. Probably some event to handle, I suppose.”

Jeongin furrowed his eyebrows, surprised. “Wait, you have a shift tomorrow? I must have forgotten.”

“It’s okay, maybe I just haven’t told you about it. You know how it is.” Felix gave a small shrug, keeping his voice soft and quiet.

Jeongin hummed, his fingers now moving across the skin of Felix’s arm, tracing it up and down. He noticed goosebumps appearing wherever he touched. 

“I can swing you home after that, hm? It will give you more time to rest before the test,” he suggested.

Felix let out a deep sigh, squeezing his eyes closed. “Yeah, I suppose.”

But his voice didn’t sound very convincing.

Silence grew thicker when it settled this time, laden with the weight of what remained unsaid. Jeongin could feel it in the tension between their bodies, which appeared just the same as it always did whenever their conversation would as much as brush against the matter of Felix’s home. Something churned in his stomach at the thought, but at the same time, it was still hard to decide whether it was the right moment.

Lost in his thoughts again, he almost flinched when Felix spoke, bringing his internal conflict to an end.

“You want to ask about it right? About my mother,” he mumbled, bringing his attention back. The arm he kept on Jeongin’s stomach shifted ever so slightly in a nervous twitch.

Jeongin let out a deep breath, bracing himself for the upcoming conversation. They were entering dangerous waters and he needed to handle it well.

“Only if you’re ready to talk about it. I’ll never push you, okay?” He pulled him just a little closer, but this time it felt like it was more for himself than for him. “If anything, I’m just worried about you. That’s all.”

Felix squeezed his eyes again, shifting on his chest as if to nuzzle himself closer, too. “I know and I’m sorry.” His voice was full of remorse when he spoke, but it sounded determined as well. “I just– It’s hard for me to talk about it. I don’t know how to talk about it.”

With a shaky breath, he slowly pushed himself back up, leaving the comfort of Jeongin’s chest. Only then did Jeongin notice the single tear that had already slid down his cheek. The sight made him move immediately to sit up as well, with worry filling his heart in a big, unstoppable wave.

He reached for his hands, his heart beating hard against his chest. “Felix–”

“It’s okay.” The boy waved his hand dismissively, taking a shaky inhale. “I don’t even know why I’m crying.” He breathed out a nervous laugh, dropping his gaze to the covers.

Jeongin felt as if somebody was ripping his heart apart but he waited, allowing the boy to gather his words. Shit, they were supposed to get enough sleep, but instead, he’d made the boy cry. Just perfect.

Another tear dropped from the boy’s eye but he was quick to wipe it. It took him a moment to calm down and talk as he shifted to sit cross-legged, keeping his gaze down and fiddling with his fingers. And Jeongin could only lean in, watching his face carefully with furrowed eyebrows, ready to handle whatever the boy was going to share.

“It’s just, um–” Felix hesitated, giving his hair a quick sweep. “Ever since my father left, she’s always despised me. I never even got to know him, my father. All I know is that he gave me that name and then ran away to Australia. All the way across the ocean.” 

He gave a little shrug, as if it was all nothing. As if he had already come to terms with his own nightmare. He curled his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, tugging at the colorful bracelet that was gracing his wrist.

 “My name’s all he left,” he continued, his voice bitter. “And I think it makes her hate me even more. I guess I remind her of him. That she would’ve been happier if I’d never been born.”

Jeongin felt his insides twist but he scooted closer, propping himself on one hand to lean more into his direction. The only touch he allowed himself to share right now was on the bracelet, following the boy’s fingers and touching it with his own.

“Does she– Has she ever hurt you?” he finally asked, the words barely coming out of his throat. He felt a bile gathering there, the sole thought of violence being used against his boyfriend making him sick.

But Felix just shook his head, hooking their pinkies together. Causing both of them to stare there now, down on their hands.

“No, not really. She’s not the abusive kind. I’m more like a burden to her. Something she keeps just because she has to.” A weak laugh escaped him, so ironic to hear with those words. “She even cares about me a tad, you know. Texts me to ask when I’m coming back home and stuff. When it’s late, for example.”

But she didn’t today, Jeongin wanted to say. She told you not to come home.

“Is that why you can’t sleep? Because of her?” he asked instead, measuring every word as carefully as he could.

“Oh, yeah, well. She’s just trying to live life, you know.” He shrugged once again, the movement so repeatable that Jeongin wasn’t able to take it seriously anymore. “Drinks alcohol, brings men home and that stuff.” Another shrug. “I just can’t really sleep when it’s loud.”

Jeongin lifted his eyes up to the ceiling, biting his lip hard just to stop himself from saying too much. His heart had just broken into a million pieces and he wasn’t sure how he was going to put it back together.

Putting caution aside, he gently took both of Felix’s hands and raised them to his face, pressing his forehead against his knuckles. As if he needed to make sure the boy was still safe next to him and not anywhere else where somebody could harm him.

 “You shouldn’t be going through this, Felix. You shouldn’t have to keep walking exhausted just because she wants to–” Fuck. he shook his head, pressing his mouth into a thin line. The word almost slipped but he remembered just in time not to use it. He couldn’t risk it, saying too much to a person who’s already heard more than enough. “You’re still going to school, finals are right behind the corner. You shouldn’t have to stress even at your own house.”

“It’s not going to change, Ayen,” the boy replied, his voice hoarse and at the verge of breaking. “As long as I stay there, it’s not going to change.”

“Then let me help you, at least,” Jeongin lifted his head, staring into his eyes with determination, his thumbs drawing circles on the boy’s knuckles. “You already know my biggest secret, shit, you could ruin my life if you wanted. So let me at least help you with yours.”

The words were enough to make Felix burst into tears, surprising them both with the reaction. His shoulders slumped as he took his hands away, moving them up to hide his face instead.

“I just– I don’t know what to d-do,” he hiccuped, shoulders shaking with every word. “She keeps bringing them, and now Seongje knows, and I can’t sleep but there’s finals, the school, and–”

Jeongin shifted closer immediately, grabbing the back of his head and pulling him closer, allowing the boy to cry into his shoulder. The feeling of his spine sticking out through the T-shirt hit him more than usual as he rubbed his back, making his heart clench even more. Everything, every single thing was just so, so wrong, and Jeongin wondered how in hell one person was even allowed to go through all this.

“Shh, baby, it’s okay. We’ll figure something out, yeah?” He pressed a kiss to his head, swaying them gently. “I’m stuck with you, right? You said it yourself. So you’re stuck with me, too.”

Jeongin felt the slight shake of Felix’s head against his shoulder as the crying slowly subsided, replaced by the soft, shaky breaths of the boy finally letting himself be held. The wetness of Felix’s tears soaked into his shirt, his body curved uncomfortably from where he was sitting.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.” Felix mumbled, his voice thick and muffled against Jeongin’s shirt. “You’ve already done so much and I acted like a prick.”

Jeongin squeezed his eyes, unable to even hear those explanations. “Don’t worry about this, please. You’re so, so brave, okay? I can’t imagine how hard it must have been.” He kissed his temple again, his thumb caressing his cheek. “We should try to get some sleep, now, okay? It will help all that math settle in your brain.” 

Felix gave a small nod and sniffled, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. “I’m sorry, I look like a mess again.” He breathed out a laugh, shaking his head in disbelief. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this.”

 His face was indeed a mess again, red and covered in snot all over, but honestly, Jeongin didn’t care in the slightest. A crying mess or not, Felix was still the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

He gently reached out to cup Felix’s cheek, tilting his head up until their eyes met. “Remember that I’m a loser, right?” he said, offering a weak smile. “You’ll need more than tears to scare me away.”

Felix opened his eyes in disbelief and scoffed, the joke pulling a laugh from him despite the tears. “Jesus, you’re not a loser, stop saying that. You’re literally a superhero.” He gazed at him fondly, his eyes still shining.

Jeongin scrunched his nose as he moved closer, his gaze never leaving Felix’s face. “Well, I’m a loser when it comes to you. I could barely speak when you were around.” He brushed his fingers across his cheek, wiping the salty drops off. “Taking my breath away and stuff.”

Felix’s blush turned even brighter as leaned an inch closer. “I can’t believe I’ve never noticed. You’ve really liked me since second grade?”

“Yeah, that was the turning point, I guess,” Jeongin shrugged, a little embarrassed to admit the duration of his longing. Even though Felix already knew it. “As I said, I never got the courage to approach you.”

Noticing the boy trying to wipe his face, Jeongin leaned over to grab a tissue. Felix took it with a grateful nod.

“It’s ridiculous. You’re literally a celebrity,” he protested, taking a pause to blow his nose. “A buff one, at that,” he added, scoffing out a soft laugh.

Jeongin rolled his eyes, falling back onto the pillows and resting on his elbows. “Oh, well. So you think I’m hot?” He tilted his head with a teasing grin.

Felix’s expression turned indignant as he moved to smack his arm. “Of course, you dumbass. You should know it already.” His shoulders shook with a giggle.

Happy to see his boyfriend smiling, Jeongin just played along, rolling to lay on his side and watching him with a glint in his eyes. “Funny thing, I think you’re hot, too. It’s kinda like we’re matching.” He smirked, propping his head on his palm.

Felix shook his head in disbelief, letting out a loud laugh. “Oh my god, this is madness. We were supposed to sleep.”

“Well, it’s not like I’m stopping you, is it? Unless you don’t wanna get burnt by my hot body,” Jeongin teased, wiggling his eyebrows.

“You’re unbelievable.” Felix rolled his eyes but finally moved, crawling back into his arms with an annoyed smile. “And just for the record, you do generate warmth. I always wake up all sweaty when I fall asleep next to you.”

“​Maybe I should sign up for that TV show then,” Jeongin replied, opening his arms for Felix to settle in. “Too Hot to Handle, wasn’t it?”

​“What you should do is to shut up,” Felix muttered, settling back into his familiar position on Jeongin’s chest.

The boy nuzzled his cheek into his T-shirt and slid his hand just a tad under the material. His skin was colder than Jeongin’s and the sensation made his muscles tighten, a breath hitching in his throat. Trying to ignore it, he just pulled the covers over them, and upon making sure Felix was tucked comfortably, he finally reached to turn the bedside lamp off.

The room was absorbed in complete darkness now, making the silence even more audible. Jeongin could hear every thump of Felix’s heart, feel the rises and falls of his chest. He was aware of every single body cell that came in touch with his body, and more than all, he could feel his hesitation, as if he still wasn’t ready to fall asleep.

“I was wondering,” the boy finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. Jeongin felt a tickle on his stomach as his fingers moved, sliding just a tad closer. “Are you disappointed in me? Now that you know all that stuff,” he asked and his fingers twisted into a fist, clutching onto the material of Jeongin’s shirt.

Jeongin took a deep breath, feeling his own chest rising under the weight of Felix’s body. He already knew what was going through his head. The reason underlying all his hesitation in opening up, the fear of people turning his back at him once they knew the truth. Jeongin had already figured it out, having spent days on analyzing Felix’s behavior. 

He shook his head, even though Felix wasn’t even able to see that. “Oh, baby, no. I’m just– glad you trusted me, okay? It’s all I could’ve asked for.”

The boy stirred on his chest. “But I’m not this, you know. Perfect boy everybody thinks I am.”

“I’ve never expected you to be perfect, Lix. I just wanted to get to know you better.” He pressed a kiss to his head, pulling him even closer. “And now that I do, I… I guess I’m just getting more obsessed.”

“Maybe I’m a little obsessed, too,” Felix mumbled in response, barely audible.

Jeongin felt a giddy flutter spreading all over his body, the corners of his mouth tugging up. “Oh, are you?”

“Mhm.”

“Well, that makes the two of us,” he replied in a quiet voice, shifting a little to make himself comfortable. Felix’s head was almost next to his now, perfectly close for him to kiss his head if needed. Jeongin nuzzled his cheek in blond hair. “Try to sleep now, okay?” he asked, closing his own eyes. “Good night.”

Finally, he could feel the boy relax. “Good night.”

Soon after, the rise and falls of his chest gained a steady rhythm. He stirred lightly in his sleep when a roar of thunder grumbled in the distance, but regained composure when Jeongin tightened his embrace. And Jeongin hugged him close once the thunderstorm broke out and once it passed, hugged him even when the roaring outside gave way to silence broken only with single drops falling behind his window. He didn’t close his eyes for a long time, able to hear his aunt entering the flat at some point in the night, the quiet rumour of her getting ready to sleep, the silence that followed, and finally the birds chirping with the arrival of dawn.

Staying awake for hours, just in case Felix was to wake up.

Chapter Text

Rainy mornings always carried a certain chill in the air, even those just before summer.

A cold creeping across the skin of his arm was the first sensation Felix felt, slowly pulling him from the realm of dreams. The soft sway of the curtains was the next thing he noticed, an indication of what he could already feel through his goosebumps. Bringing a delicate coolness that lingered in the air—a breeze of something fresh and intriguing, just enough for a person to know that the next day had arrived.

Felix blinked a few times, taking in his surroundings. The room was slowly flooding with light, a little dim and blue due to the early hour, yet foreshadowing a sunny day. There was a desk, a wardrobe, some shelves attached to the walls and stocked with books, comics, and lego sets. Luke Skywalker’s X-Wing Fighter, Felix remembered. And the Justifier. There were not many sounds either, only some raindrops tapping against the sill on the other side of the window and a distant chirping of birds. Nothing else apart from that, at least not for the span of a few long seconds he needed to acknowledge the presence of another person.

He stirred a little and realized that the pillow under his cheek wasn’t in fact a pillow. His body was wrapped with pleasant warmth all over, hidden under the duvet from above and tucked close to Jeongin. His head was resting on his chest, the slow rising and falling of which he wasn’t even able to notice until a long moment had passed, already used to the sensation. His left arm had somehow slipped out of the cocoon and was lying on the covers, across Jeongin’s belly. His boyfriend had one arm out too, following his own and keeping it somewhere close to his elbow. Even their legs were intertwined somehow, with Felix’s ankle hooked over Jeongin’s. Tucked to his side like a koala, Felix wondered if the boy was comfortable in this position, too. But it seemed like he was, judging from the soft hums of his even breathing.

Felix was slow to rise, careful not to disturb the sleeping boy. He rolled onto his side and pushed himself on his forearms, turning his body to see Jeongin better. The boy was still asleep, and once Felix saw his face, it was hard to take his eyes off. Only now did he realize that this was the first time when he witnessed the boy asleep.

He had never really gotten a chance to watch him so up close. Those times when he could, they mostly ended up kissing, not to mention that Jeongin was always awake around him. The only exception was the day he had found him unconscious in the locker room at school, but that didn’t count as Felix had been too stressed out back then to appreciate the sight. Not that there had been much to appreciate anyway, with Jeongin’s face covered all in sweat, blood, and ash.

Today, however, it was such a different sight. His dark lashes were so long they were brushing the skin under his eyes. His skin was surprisingly healthy, with only a few small pimples present on his forehead and chin, but they weren’t even that prominent. His nose was also endearing, curved in a way that made it look like a button. What caught his attention the most though were his lips—slightly parted in his sleep, but so red and plump that Felix couldn’t take his eyes off. A thin thread of saliva had left one corner of his mouth, now sinking into the pillow, but it didn’t repel him in the slightest.

Something sparked in his chest when he realized the reason for which he had found himself in this room. A ghost of yesterday slowly flashed through his mind, memories sorting out and gaining more sharpness and detail. He remembered the kissing, the taste of their lips covered in lip balms. The warmth of Jeongin’s back when he rested against it, his patient voice slowly lulling him into a slumber. Then waking up, covered in sweat and stressed from putting Jeongin in such a situation again. And then the text message, the food, the hugs, the kisses… and the conversation that followed, taking off his back everything he had been carrying there for years.

Propping himself on his arms, Felix rubbed his eyes and scanned the room for a clock. It was placed on a shelf on the other side of the room, and just as he expected, it read barely half past 5AM. Letting out a sigh, he dragged a hand down his face. Not surprising at all, given how used he was to waking up so early in the morning. Although maybe he had hoped to sleep in at least this single time. The circumstances were just perfect, and even despite the early waking up, Felix still could admit that this was the first time in months he had found himself sleeping throughout the whole night without any interruptions.

Jeongin must have registered him moving even through his sleep. He stirred and pulled Felix closer by his waist while his head moved down to his belly as he curled. The sudden movement made Felix tumble down onto the pillows. His breath quickened as he stared in shock at his boyfriend, now hugging him close and sleeping peacefully with his cheek nuzzled into his T-shirt as if nothing had happened. He even let out a satisfied hum as his face was almost all hidden, with only a part of it appearing from behind his disheveled hair.

What was not covered when Felix stared down was the hickey on his neck, still fresh and reddened, a little faded but noticeable. A blush crept to his cheeks when he noticed, the memory of yesterday flashing through his mind. God, he liked this boy so much. Butterflies fluttered in his belly as he moved his hand up, fingers hovering over the mark. He slowly touched the skin, moving along until he reached the dark, thick hair, and his hand got lost in the strands. He scratched the scalp, combed his fingers through the soft hair, brushing and caressing. It was such a new feeling, to have Jeongin on his lap, calm and asleep, instead of being the one to be cared for. And now, Felix couldn’t decide which one he liked more.

He wondered if Jeongin was even happy to have that hickey, as it seemed like Felix had once again acted upon his own emotions, putting actions before thought. It always happened when they kissed that Felix found himself overwhelmed and dazed by desire, setting all reasoning aside. It made him shy afterwards when he thought about it, but in the heat of the moment he was never able to control himself, lost too deep in that delightful sense of safety which accompanied him whenever Jeongin was close. It was like he wasn’t going to judge him or push him away, allowing him to take the lead even when Felix’s actions were so close to crossing a line.

He brushed the dark strands away from his face, staring at his peaceful expression. A smile tugged at his lips, and for a moment he wanted to grab and squeeze those soft cheeks, resisting the urge only because he was still asleep. What an irony, wasn’t it? That smart nerd from his class to whom Felix had never paid much attention because it didn’t seem like they were in the same league was now the only person out there who knew Felix’s secret. And for even more antics, Felix was the only one who knew Jeongin’s secret. A fair deal, an even exchange. And for some reason, there Felix was, wondering how the hell the boy still hadn’t grown tired of his shit and walked away.

Before his mind could swirl into that darker area of doubts, there was a stir on his belly. Something moved up to where his fingers were combing through the boy’s hair and suddenly they were intertwined with another hand, bringing them down and stopping the movements, instead providing a soothing brushing over his knuckles. Felix froze and looked down, but Jeongin’s eyes remained closed. His head moved a little though, getting comfortable against his body, the movement soon followed by a soft hum. And finally, right before his eyes, the faintest curve of a smile tugged at his red lips.

Felix stared at him in disbelief, almost scoffing out an amused laugh. He didn’t even know how much time had passed since his own wake-up but somehow it felt like both a few minutes and an hour. But he was so happy that Jeongin was there with him now, as his brain tended to overthink when there was too much quiet.

Never breaking the hold Jeongin had initiated, he used his other hand to caress his face again, drawing circles somewhere around his temples. With a huge grin stretching his mouth, he moved it lower, along the side of his face, down to where the boy was smiling. A sly fox, still pretending to be asleep. Felix pushed himself up on his forearm a little just to see better and cupped the boy’s cheek, turning his face to the side.

“I know you’re not asleep,” he murmured, holding back a laugh.

“Just for a moment,” Jeongin mumbled, keeping his eyes closed. He let out a deep sigh and shifted his body, putting even more weight on Felix. “Your voice alone could lull me.”

Something fluttered in Felix’s chest at that. He ran his hand through the boy’s hair, enjoying how soft and smooth it felt under his touch. The boy was spread fully on his stomach, nuzzling his face in Felix’s belly. And Felix found himself rather pleased with the position, for once being the one to care for him, not the other way around.

“We still have some time left, so. You don’t need to rush,” he replied in a low voice, watching him fondly.

His boyfriend hummed in response, letting out another deep breath. “Good. I don’t feel like going anywhere now.”

 He was such a different character in the morning, nothing like that mature version of him who always made sure to put everyone else in the first place. Right now he was just another teenager, sleepy but also a little mischievous. And with his hair ruffled and sleep lines marking his cheeks, Felix couldn’t help but adore him.

“How is it even possible, huh?” Felix teased, sliding his hand down along his spine, creeping under his T-shirt. “Some days you’re already out saving the city before sunrise, and now you can barely keep your eyes open.”

“This city had already lasted centuries without me, it can for sure live one day longer,” Jeongin replied, shifting his body a little. His arms had moved to both sides of Felix’s body, resting somewhere under his ribs.

Rubbing his back up and down, Felix tilted his head back with a lazy, amused smile. “Sure. We shouldn’t expect our superhero to put our city before napping.”

“You sound like you wanna get rid of me,” Jeongin grumbled in an accusative tone.

A laugh rumbled through Felix’s chest as he slipped his hand out from under his shirt. “Sorry, I just didn’t expect to see you like that,” he said, grabbing his cheek instead just to give it a little squeeze. “So cute and sleepy, like a baby,” he cooed.

The touch managed to steal an embarrassed snicker from his boyfriend, the boy hiding his already blushing face as his fingers clutched onto the material of Felix’s shirt. “You should go to sleep, too,” he mumbled.

“Fine,” Felix sighed with a grin, sliding his hand back to caress the boy’s back. He lingered on the feeling of warm muscles under his fingers, and Jeongin seemed to melt into the touch, too. “I’ll give you a few more minutes.”

Feeling the boy relax against his body, Felix allowed himself to settle back as well. His hand was still caressing Jeongin’s back, slowing its movements just a little to match the way both of their breaths had tuned down and adjusted, becoming the only disturbance in the silence. They remained like that for some time, both of them aware that such a moment might not be repeated in the nearest future.

The room was slowly becoming brighter as sunlight peeked from behind the blinds. It flooded with light with every passing minute while the wind that had been swaying the curtains died down. Undoubtedly it was going to be a warm day, one that smelled of summer. Felix regretted he had a shift in the afternoon—otherwise, he would insist he and Jeongin spend it outside. They could even go and try studying at the park or something, maybe even watch the sunset on a beach. They hadn’t done that yet, Felix realized. Hopefully, summer would give them the time.

When Felix turned again to look at the clock, it was already six in the morning. As much as he enjoyed lying there with Jeongin on his stomach, with his arms wrapped around his body like a warm blanket and his head being so cute to caress, the imminent beginning of the day started gnawing at his guts. He could hear some soft cluttering behind the door, an indication that aunt Sohee was already up. The sounds of the city were also growing louder as people flooded onto the streets, bringing the sounds of cars, honks, and conversations.

A sudden ambulance siren that sliced through the air with its urgent wailing was like a basket of cold water on his head, bringing him out from his bubble. Just enough to catch Jeongin’s attention too, as the boy raised his head immediately, turning to the window.

“Hey,” Felix called for his attention as soon as he noticed, brushing his hand under his chin. “That’s not your call, Spider.”

“Right.” Jeongin nodded and wiped his face with his hand, squinting his eyes a little as he thought. “What time is it anyway?”

His morning voice was so low and hoarse after the nap that it made Felix’s body tremble. Trying not to give it away, he cleared his throat and glanced at the clock.

“It’s six already,” he said, turning his gaze back to Jeongin. “We should get up soon.”

“I don’t wanna get up,” Jeongin groaned, shifting a little above Felix’s legs, still on his stomach but keeping his head high. Both his arms were along Felix’s body, and while Felix kept combing his hair and caressing his face, just as he had been doing for some time now, Jeongin’s fingers started exploring his torso, playing with the hem of his T-shirt.

“Did you sleep well?” Jeongin asked, glancing up at him. His fingers sneaked under his shirt, tracing little circles on his waist as he blinked sleepily, as if barely aware of his own movements.

Meanwhile, Felix was in a mild internal panic, having been awake far too long to remain unaffected. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. “More than well,” he murmured, cracking a smile. “You’re a very nice pillow.”

Jeongin scoffed out a laugh and his eyes crinkled into crescents. “I’m glad to hear it, then. You’re a very nice cuddlebear, too,” he added, patting his belly.

Felix arched an eyebrow, snickering. “A cuddlebear?”

Jeongin shifted from side to side while his fingers made the hem of Felix’s T-shirt roll up.  “Yeah,” he said with a playful grin, and then he leaned down, just to press a sweet kiss to Felix’s belly. “A very cute cuddlebear.”

Felix’s breath hitched, surprised by the sudden affection. Goosebumps spread all over him like a wave, as if that simple kiss had awoken all the butterflies in his stomach. At once, all he could do was just pray for his cheeks not to burn all red—but he felt like it was already too late.

Jeongin looked at him with a playful glint in his eyes, grinning widely when he noticed his blush. “So cute, see?”

“I don’t think so.” Felix squirmed under his gaze, his hand leaving his hair just to tug at his shirt in a nervous reflex. The look his boyfriend was giving him from behind those loose strands covering his forehead was not good for his critical thinking.

“No?” Jeongin tilted his head with a pout, while his hands moved down to rest on Felix’s hips. “But I thought you were very cute.” He pressed another light kiss to his stomach. “Sweet… like candy.”

Felix froze for a moment, heart racing, as Jeongin’s lips lingered on his stomach. The air that touched his skin where the shirt was rolled up was making him shiver. Before he could say anything, another kiss drew a giggle from him, making him fall down on the pillows, hide his face in his arms as he tried to endure those merciless tickles. And Jeongin just chuckled against his skin, pressing a kiss after kiss all over, tracing a line only he could see.

“Oh my god, stop,” Felix whined, trying to roll to his side to escape the tickles, but failing, overpowered by his own laugh. “Your—your aunt is up already.”

“So what? You didn’t care at all when you were kissing me yesterday.” Jeongin raised his head up and patted the hickey on his neck pointedly. “And this one she actually can see.” 

Peeking out through his fingers, Felix closed his eyes back again. “I told you I was sorry!”

A soft chuckle escaped Jeongin’s mouth as he pressed one last kiss to his stomach and pulled the T-shirt back down. “There, no more kisses. No one’s gonna see.” He gave his belly a light pat and finally moved up, crawling to lie next to him.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” Felix mumbled, scooting to the side to make space for him. The bed was so small for two people that even in this position, their knees were touching.

“What, now you’re playing the innocent one?” Jeongin propped his head on his hand, giving a satisfied grin. “Or should I remind you how yesterday—”

Felix was quick to cover his mouth with his palm, unable to hear a reminder of yesterday. Both of them knew he was usually the one to initiate, always happy for a kiss, but he didn’t necessarily need to hear it out loud.

“I do remember well, thank you,” he said, ignoring the burning on his cheeks. “Besides, you never told me to stop.”

Jeongin’s eyes crinkled with suppressed laughter under his palm. Seeing that, Felix rolled his eyes and pulled his hand away. But before he could turn around, it was immediately captured by Jeongin, who laced their fingers together.

“It’s fine,” he said, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand. “You just never fail to surprise me.”

Butterflies fluttered in his stomach as he stared at his boyfriend, words getting caught in his throat. All of a sudden he was the prettiest thing Felix had ever seen.

Staring deep in his eyes, he pulled his hand out of his grasp and rolled forward, cupping Jeongin’s face instead. They exchanged a small smile before Felix slowly leaned in, pressing their lips together without thinking. One move of his lips and Jeongin reacted, guiding him closer with his hands as they landed on his hips. A shiver ran through his body at the touch and he pressed deeper, letting it be the only important sensation.

Jeongin was quick to catch up, returning the pressure with even more hunger. His hands began to roam and one of them slipped under his T-shirt just as before, making Felix jealous. Keeping one hand on his nape, he slid the other one down Jeongin’s chest, so as not to stay behind, then all the way back up. He shifted just a little closer, using the anchoring grip of Jeongin’s hands to settle his full weight against his chest. So close that he couldn’t tell their heartbeats apart.

That familiar rush of desire ran through him again, overwhelming his senses as always when Jeongin was too close. But he couldn’t help but capture, feeling like every kiss was bringing him closer to heaven. It was as if his whole body was begging, addicted to the way Jeongin always made him feel so safe and protected. And now that he was basking in his presence, he wasn’t sure he would be able to pull apart.

The only thing that kept him on earth was the lack of air as the pressure of their chests made it hard to breathe. He fought his desire against the need of air now, alternating quick kisses with heavy, ragged gasps, desperate for more. Losing himself in the warmth and the closeness, but also growing so very aware of how much he cared for that boy.

“Thank you for letting me stay,” he gasped in between the kisses, not even opening his eyes. His own emotions were already creating enough of a vision.

“Thank you for telling me,” Jeongin murmured against his lips, the words blurring into the shared kiss.

Felix finally pulled back, heaving over him and breathing heavily. He stared for a moment, trying to catch his breath, then lightly shook his head.

“I’m serious, Ayen,” he said, locking their eyes with intention. “I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

Gratitude warmed his heart when he realized how true it actually was. There had never been anyone allowed to know about his mother, and therefore no one ever able to help him. Felix had always been afraid of what the others could say, how they would react upon discovering that his own mother despised him. He always thought it was going to ruin him, to turn back against everyone he ever cared for. But Jeongin never confirmed his worries, showing him the kind of support he had never even dreamed of. Staying next to him, no matter how fucked up his life was.

“I would have followed you all night if you didn’t want to stay here, you know?” Jeongin said breathlessly, a sudden urgency marking his words. “I wouldn’t leave you alone.”

“I don’t want you to leave me alone,” Felix admitted, his voice a broken whisper as he closed his arms around him and brought them into a tight hug. “I’m sorry I was so secretive about it. It’s just— it’s not the easiest topic.”

Wrapping his hands around his waist, Jeongin rolled them both over as if they weighed nothing. He tucked his face in the crook of Felix’s neck and pressed a tender kiss on his collarbone, his hair tickling the sensitive skin.

“Never be sorry about this, okay?” Jeongin pulled back just enough to look him in the eye, his brows furrowed in a worried frown. “I can’t imagine how hard it must be.”

Lying again on his back, all Felix could do was stare at him helplessly. His fingers tightened on Jeongin’s biceps and there was a weight growing in his throat, one that usually foreshadowed nothing else than tears.

“I’ve never told anybody, you know?” he admitted quietly, feeling a wave of vulnerability spread over him. There was no other place where he felt as safe as in Jeongin’s arms, no other place where he could leave his thoughts open. “A mother who hates me never seemed like a good small-talk topic.” He breathed out a short, awkward laugh.

Jeongin didn’t even flinch, observing him with worry written all over his face. “It’s not just a small-talk, Lix, it’s your life. You shouldn’t be carrying this alone.”

Felix squeezed his eyes shut, nodding. “Yeah, I know,” he murmured, his voice thick. The words caught in his throat, and instead, with a shaky sigh, he hid his face deep in Jeongin’s shoulder, taking in the warmth of his shirt.

Hugging him close, Jeongin shifted his weight and easily leveraged them both into a seated position, allowing Felix to collapse securely against his chest.

“There’s not a part of you that you need to be embarrassed about, okay?” he murmured and pressed a kiss to his temple, rocking them gently from side to side. “Not around me.”

Felix needed a moment to calm down, wiping his cheek with embarrassment after a stray tear left a damp trace. Yet despite all that, there was also some newfound lightness in his heart, making space for things that hadn’t been able to enter in the past. Like a storage room full of garbage being uncluttered, revealing gems nobody could see when they were covered with dust.

Jeongin pulled back just enough to tilt Felix’s chin up, noticing the moisture. “Oh my god, baby, are you crying?” he cooed and the gentle sway immediately stopped. He didn’t wait for an answer, instead tucking Felix’s face securely against his neck and tightening his arms. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Shaking his head, Felix gently pulled back, afraid that more affection would only shatter his composure. “Don’t worry, something’s just got in my eye,” he explained, brushing his eye for a better point. A short, shaky sniffle gave him away though.

“Sure.” Watching him with a fond smile, Jeongin brushed his hair back from his forehead. “Otherwise I would get worried.”

Felix breathed out a laugh and shook his head again. “I don’t want you to.” He glanced at him with a shy smile. “You’ve done enough for me already.”

“Yet I still haven’t made you pancakes.” Jeongin wrapped a firm, warm arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer, giving his temple another kiss. “C’mon, there’s a long day before us,” he said, giving his shoulder a reassuring rub. “Let’s not greet it on an empty stomach.”

But Felix didn’t want to let go, clinging to that anchoring safety like an addict. Putting his arms around Jeongin’s nape, he raised himself on his knees, hovering above him. Jeongin appeared a little surprised but he didn’t stop him. He put his hands on his hips for support, allowing Felix to press their lips together once again.

 Sometimes it just happened that he deemed all words unnecessary. Felix had learned that no fragile sentence could carry the weight of what he wanted to convey, no language other than nonverbal could transfer it all. So he settled for silence instead, for some reason convinced that Jeongin would understand.

The kiss was just enough to bring the lightness back, setting them into a comfortable shyness. Jeongin’s hands remained close to his hips as they finally managed to slide out of the bed, both of them staying close to one another as they worked side by side, smoothing the tangled sheets and pulling up the comforter, giggling and exchanging quick, sweet kisses in the process. Suddenly it was like Felix was living a dream, able to hold his hand as they entered the kitchen, then sitting close when they ate breakfast. With Jeongin’s pancakes suddenly becoming the sweetest delight he had ever tried.

The presence of Aunt Sohee made Felix recoil just a little, although he learned soon that there was nothing to be ashamed of. If she ever noticed any excess in their affection, she never made a comment. The only thing he could see were those happy sparkles in her eyes, so similar to Jeongin’s, as she told them about her night at the opera before leaving for work.

The boys had to leave just a few minutes after, mostly because apparently, Felix looked ‘too cute’ in Jeongin’s oversized hoodie. Which caused him to pout and cross his arms while his boyfriend just tucked the hood over his head, talking some nonsense about him getting a cold because of the wind, right after stealing some time for a kiss.

“I think it’s going to be warm later, but the morning is still chilly after the rain,” Jeongin explained, tying the drawstrings into a neat bow under his chin. “I don’t want you to get sick.”

Felix just huffed under his nose, resisting the urge to roll his eyes at him. He pushed his hands deep into the huge pocket and watched his boyfriend with an arched eyebrow. With everything that had happened since yesterday, he had somehow forgotten about Jeongin’s idea to swing them to school—and now he wasn’t so sure what he thought about it.

“Ayen, I don’t know, are you sure about this?” Felix asked, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “I know we’ve done this already but– but what if somebody from school sees us? Or something else happens, I don’t know, it’s broad daylight.” 

“Oh baby, don’t worry.” Already in his suit, Jeongin finished stuffing his backpack and walked closer to him, placing his hands on his shoulders. “I have it all figured out, I’ve done it a hundred times. We’ll take the high route and avoid exposed spots, don’t worry, nobody’s gonna notice.”

“All right, fine,” Felix replied, accepting a kiss to the top of his head. “I guess that’s what I get for getting a good sleep.”

“Hey, I told you you could sleep in,” Jeongin said, throwing his backpack on. “You didn’t have to wake up so early.”

“It’s out of habit. I still slept better than ever.” He grabbed Jeongin’s mask from where it was lying on his bed and fidgeted with it between his fingers. “I still can’t believe you made it all yourself. You’re an actual genius, you know that?”

Jeongin grinned, reaching out to tap the mask with one finger. “Have you heard that myth about Arachne? Where she was such an excellent tailor and Athena turned her into a spider.” He adjusted the web-shooters on his wrists before snatching the mask from his hands. “I think I’ve got a reversal of that story.”

“I wish there was a spider that would turn me into a genius,” Felix sighed, grabbing his own backpack from the floor. “Or at least help me understand math.”

Brushing his dark hair back, Jeongin let out a chuckle. “Funny thing is I know a thing or two about math. Wanna kiss to see if it works?” He pulled his lips into an expectant pout.

Felix snorted, swinging his backpack onto his shoulders. “I think we’ve tested that theory pretty extensively yesterday and—my brain capacity is still stubbornly mediocre.” He arched a funny eyebrow but walked closer to him nonetheless, grabbing the back of Jeongin’s neck. “But I guess it never hurts to try.”

He drew him closer for a short kiss, happy with it just as much as Jeongin was. The boy pulled him by his waist immediately, like he always did, keeping him close even when they pulled back and he had to put his mask on.

“All right, I think we’re all good to go.” Jeongin swung open the window and jumped onto the sill, reaching an inviting hand towards him.

Felix’s movements were much less graceful as he crawled behind him, peeking out hesitantly until Jeongin wrapped his arm securely around his waist.

​“Don’t worry, you’re not going to fall. Not on my watch.” He finally pulled Felix flush against his side and crawled onto the exterior wall, sticking easily to the brick. With one quick, expert shot of the web, he sealed the window shut behind them. “All right, off we go. Hold on tight!”

And without another word, they dove into the city.

To say that Felix enjoyed the swing would be an overstatement. While it was certainly better than a ride in a crowded and stinky bus, it wasn’t all that fun either—mostly he just prayed for survival, clutching his limbs around Jeongin like a koala. The wind howled in his ears even despite the hood, and when it came to sightseeing, he mostly just kept his eyes shut and his face buried in Jeongin’s neck. He didn’t even scream, having learnt that it was much easier to bear it with his mouth closed.

Those few moments when he dared to open his eyes, he was only able to see a blur of the city, with all the colours mixing into one huge, colourful splotch. It also seemed like Jeongin took the highest route possible, because as much as Felix watched, everything above them was so far away and tiny. But in all that speed and height, Jeongin’s movements seemed much more cautious and controlled than they usually were, less reckless and more calculated, never allowing the tugs of the web to shake at them too much.

The whole trip lasted only about a few minutes. Jeongin was very delicate when putting him down—he landed softly on a wall of a building, and once he checked that the coast was clear, he hopped down and put Felix on the ground. They were now in a narrow, dirty alley with nothing interesting around, apart from some trash scattered across the pavement.

“Is this our school already?” Felix asked doubtfully, taking a glance around. The area didn’t look familiar at all, and since his eyes had been closed for most of the duration of their journey, he had no means of telling whether they had already arrived.

“Almost, just a few streets away,” Jeongin explained, already throwing his backpack to the ground and snatching the mask off his face.

“What the hell are you doing?” Felix exclaimed in a hushed voice, watching the boy in panic. He moved immediately to hide him, afraid somebody was around. “What if somebody sees?”

​But Jeongin was already halfway through taking his suit off.

“Nobody’s gonna see, that’s why we’re here.” He shrugged the suit down past his shoulders with a grunt of effort, exposing his bare chest. “Now be so kind and pass me my clothes.”

Felix suddenly wasn’t sure where he was supposed to look. He crouched by his backpack and took out the jeans, throwing them at Jeongin without much care—which he of course caught without much effort either, not sparing a single look as he was busy folding the suit. Felix shook his head and focused back on the backpack, trying not to think too much about the set of muscles in the corner of his eye. A very fine set of muscles, with all those abs and all, the squeezable biceps, and those very defined lines going down right where…

It took him longer than it should to find the damn T-shirt, and his knees wobbled a little when he stood up, fidgeting with the fabric in his hands.

“Thanks.” Jeongin bestowed him with a grin and pulled him by the back of his neck, just to give him a kiss on his forehead. Felix couldn’t believe how casual he was about it all.

As he passed Jeongin the T-shirt, his eyes fell on his abdomen, noticing the scars. Even though barely a few weeks had passed since all the damage caused by the fire, the injured skin was healing surprisingly well. It was almost all recovered now, with only a thick, deep scar passing through his ribs, a little ragged on the edges.

His fingers brushed over the skin before Jeongin could cover it with fabric. It didn’t happen often that he was able to see the scar, but whenever he did, it always sparked some kind of ache. Like a reminder of what Jeongin actually did in his free time and what were the consequences. It wasn’t the only mark that he bore, just the more definite one, sharpened with the worst memories.

“Sorry, I know it’s gross.” Jeongin cleared his throat and quickly pulled his shirt down, biting his lip as he reached to hide the suit in his backpack.

“It’s not.” Felix immediately turned towards him, feeling a stab in his chest at Jeongin’s withdrawal. He grabbed his hand before he could walk any further away and intertwined their fingers, knitting his eyebrows. “I’m just glad it’s healing so well.”

Breathing out shakily, Jeongin ran a hand through his hair but didn’t let go of Felix. He offered him a weak smile and tugged him right against his chest. Felix thought he was going to say something, he was ready for an explanation or an unnecessary reassurance—but this time Jeongin surprised him, cupping his cheek and kissing him on the mouth without any words in between.

Felix’s heart had a habit of doing those foolish flips whenever Jeongin kissed him, so of course his immediate reaction was to wrap his hands around his neck and draw him closer, even if that meant losing his balance and having Jeongin keep him steady. No matter how short it would last, he always had to make the best out of it—just in case the time allowed for more.

Jeongin stepped back with a chuckle, grinning wide as he stuffed his suit on the bottom of the backpack and zipped it up. “C’mon, classes start soon. We don’t wanna be late to Mrs. Kim’s again.” He threw the bag on his shoulder and intertwined their fingers again.

“Is this, like, your usual spot? When you swing to school?” Felix asked, tucking himself close to his side. He enjoyed it much more when they walked holding hands instead of swinging through the city. His heart took it better when it accelerated in response to more grounded things, and not necessarily to the swing-triggered adrenaline.

After taking a few turns in between the buildings, they left the alley and stepped into the street, meddling with the morning crowd of people on their way to their daily duties. The sidewalk kept traces of the night thunderstorm, the bricks wet and filled with puddles where the terrain was lower. Only thin layers though, as the sun was already working to get rid of them.

“Yeah, nobody pays attention to it, it’s too excluded and hidden. I wouldn’t have noticed it was there if I hadn’t swung by,” Jeongin explained with a soft smile. He led them through the street without even paying much attention, too busy stealing glances at Felix.

“It kinda sucks that you have to change in random alleys,” noted Felix. He hadn’t thought about it before, but there seemed to be more than just one potential obstacle hiding behind the idea of a superhero forced to strip behind a trashcan. “Sounds like a lot of a hassle.”

“I do it mostly when duty calls, don’t worry. Though there aren’t many other options, to be honest. But you know what’s fun?” He turned at him with a silly grin and tapped his temple with his finger. “My senses. I don’t know how it works but I can feel cameras and stuff. It helps to avoid them.”

Felix let out a surprised chuckle, eyes opening wider. “Really? That’s, like, super cool.”

“I know, right? Comes in super handy at times.” He pulled him around himself when there was a puddle in their way, allowing Felix to go first but staying close behind him. “But I think healing is my favourite thing.” He cast him a smile. “The flu season used to give me a really hard time when I was little.”

“For real?” Arching a teasing eyebrow, Felix grabbed his bicep and gave it a little squeeze. “I thought your super-strength would be your favourite.”

“Of course you would think that, wouldn’t you?” With a disbelieving laugh, Jeongin threw his arms around his shoulders and tugged him closer to his chest, stealing a surprised chuckle out of Felix. “Maybe you should tell me what you like the most.”

Fortunately, Felix didn’t have to address that request as their lips got lost in another quick kiss. They crossed the road onto the street of their school, joining some other students walking in that direction. Nobody was in a rush as there were still about ten minutes left before the classes started, and with the day becoming so warm and sunny, it seemed like no important matters were standing in the way. With Jeongin by his side, Felix was starting to feel that blissful leisure too, closer and closer to their reach.

“Okay, so. Plans for today.” Felix pulled out his phone and opened the notes app, checking what he had already written down there so as not to forget anything. “First of all, I need to talk to Jisu. She will kill me if we don’t get all those internet poll awards ready by the end of this week, and I really don’t want to test her patience.” 

He grimaced, already able to imagine her annoyed look if they weren’t able to prepare the crowns in advance. Jisu was especially obsessed with the award ceremony, having planned that for a long time after Felix had come up with the whole Summer Dance idea. As she was also the biggest fan of the event, he never told her no, grateful to have somebody as engaged in the organization as he was. Therefore he never complained, no matter how much additional hassle the whole ceremony had brought them. 

A frown marked Jeongin’s forehead as he looked at him surprised, before throwing his head back with a groan. “Oh no, I think I forgot to vote. Are the polls still open?”

For that he received a playful slap from Felix, even though he didn’t care if Jeongin voted or not. The whole poll with different categories to favour some students was mostly Jisu’s idea, made only for fun anyway. Even though Felix himself was a little excited for the possible outcome for some of the categories.

“Fool, you missed out on your own nomination! Most likely to build a robot army.” Felix scratched his ear, trying to recall. “I think it was Jisung who submitted you.”

Jeongin rolled his eyes, a grimace of annoyance crossed his face. “Oh my god, who even came up with that?” 

A smattering of pink covered Felix’s cheeks when he remembered the other category, the one he had tried to get out of Jisu’s head when she had nominated him, but of course in vain. It wasn’t like he was totally opposed to the idea, nonetheless if somebody asked, he had nothing to do with that. Apart from nominating Jisu and Chaeryeong for the same category, that is.

“There’s also another one, you know,” he revealed, tugging at his hand to get a little closer. “The crowns for the cutest couple.”

“No way.” Jeongin’s eyes opened wide in surprise and a red blush crept to his ears. “Are you saying…” He awkwardly pointed his finger between the two of them.

“Yes, webhead, we got nominated!” Felix grabbed his arm and pressed his cheek to his shoulder, unable to stop the growing giddiness. “Don’t you think we’re the cutest?” he chirped.

“No, of course not. I mean, wait,” Jeongin was suddenly red and abashed, avoiding his eyes and staring at their feet instead. Still, Felix was able to notice a smile dancing at the corners of his lips. “You are for sure, that is, um… you are the cutest.” He shut his mouth and took a deep breath.

Felix rolled his eyes, even though something about Jeongin’s reaction was making his heart flutter. “We are the cutest, c’mon.” He leaned over to kiss his cheek, the skin so soft under his lips. “You’re such a hot cutie.”

Jeongin let out a choked sound and hid his face in Felix’s hair, pulling him closer by the waist. “Oh my god, Felix.” He groaned and his tone sounded so embarrassed that it made Felix chuckle.

Proud of himself, Felix gave a small shrug. “What, I’m telling the truth.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” With his cheeks still wearing a trace of a blush, the brunette moved his arm up from his waist, instead wrapping it around his shoulders. “What else do you have planned, president?”

Felix cast him one last giddy grin and looked back at his phone. “All right,” he swiped the note with his thumb, checking the list. “As I told you, I need to talk to Mr. Cheung. I don’t know yet what it’s about, but I can’t miss it anyway.”

His skin prickled with pleasure when Jeongin’s fingers brushed across his temple, pulling his hair behind his ear. There was no way Felix would be able to hold his smile back if he kept acting like that. Every little touch kept him grounded and Felix could swear he had never enjoyed going to school more.

He managed to reach the end of the list before they crossed the school gate. There hadn’t been that many things to check, just the meeting with the teacher and stuff to go through with Jisu, including the matter of decorations they had to take care of soon. Jeongin listened to all that ramble with what appeared to be genuine interest, and that was truly making Felix’s heart bloom. As much as he tended to overthink things in his head, somehow everything became lighter when Jeongin was by his side, able to find the right words before Felix could get lost in his own perspective.

Jisung was the first person to join them when they entered the building, spotting them from where he was standing by his locker. He jumped up to them at once, greeting Felix with a quick hug before he broke into an animated ramble about the brand new Lego exhibition they absolutely had to visit next week. His brown eyes, wide as boba pearls, shimmered at Jeongin as he explained it all, showing him pictures on his phone. Felix got to see them too, and he was genuinely happy to be included. Even though he had never cared much about such events, he felt  one word from Jeongin would convince him.

“I mean, I know you guys are busy with all that stuff coming up before holidays, but I promise, it’s going to be so worth it,” Jisung rambled, throwing his hands in the air as he talked.

“I think we can make time,” Jeongin replied. He looked at Felix and gave his hand a little squeeze, his eyes shining with hope. “What do you think?”

Jisung’s eyes immediately fell on him as well, followed by a clap of his hands. “Ah, and the good thing is that it’s open on Sunday, too. Seven days a week, whenever you can.” He gave him an expectant look.

As it always happened with something promising on the horizon, Felix’s schedule was full, with a shift even on a Sunday. He didn’t lose hope, though, convinced he could make an exception and find enough time to join. And besides, their hopeful eyes boring holes into him were too hard to resist.

“Sure, why not? I’ve never been to a Lego exhibition,” he admitted and reached to open his locker as they stopped next to it. A funny idea crossed his mind and he smirked, tugging at the zipper of his backpack to leave only the necessary things. “I can ask Minho, too. I think he would be interested,” he said.

Jisung’s cheeks flushed red at once when he heard that, freezing in his spot. “Sure, y-yeah, that would be cool!” he exclaimed through a long exhale, his eyes fleeing to the side. “If he wants to, I guess.” He scratched his head, biting his lip.

 Closing his locker, Felix exchanged a knowing smile with Jeongin. Things between their friends were still painfully awkward, even though Minho had finally managed to invite Jisung for the Summer Party. Nonetheless, the dynamics between them revolved around stolen glances and quiet comments, sometimes shy touches exchanged when nobody was looking. Given how easy it had been for Felix to find comfort around Jeongin, he marvelled at their painfully slow approach, the way they gravitated towards each other but never close enough for a collision. He waited for that day to happen, predicting that once it did, it would blow up like a supernova.

Jeongin clasped their hands together the moment Felix was done organizing his things. They headed towards his locker now, and when it was open, Felix leaned over his shoulder in curiosity of whether he kept some superhero gear inside. Jeongin raised an amused eyebrow at him but allowed him to look, even if there was nothing to see, before drawing him closer to his chest for a short kiss on his temple. And all Felix could do was take it and giggle, because oh, how he loved those short, little kisses.

Minho and Seungmin were already inside the classroom, leaning over a notebook and discussing an exercise. Felix glanced down once they exchanged ‘hi’s and instantly recoiled, noticing the dreaded math equations. He sat on the edge of a desk next to Minho, with Jeongin following suit as he hopped on next to him. There were still a few minutes left before the class started, so they could talk for a moment longer before taking their seats. 

“Hey, I haven’t seen you on the bus today,” Minho said, turning to Felix with knitted eyebrows.

The blond leaned forward, propping his hands on the edge of the desk and swinging his legs in the air. He glanced over at Jeongin next to him who was more focused on discussing the Lego exhibition with Seungmin and Jisung, the latter avoiding Minho’s gaze like the plague.

“I went with Ayen,” he replied, looking back at his friend. His boyfriend flinched and turned in their direction on cue upon hearing his name, and Felix had to try hard not to beam too much.

Minho propped his chin on his hand with an all-knowing smirk. “Oh yeah? Since when do you live so close?”

Felix wanted to groan. Him and his damn observant brain, always able to read between the lines. He must have figured out what had happened even before Felix said anything. 

“Since I stayed for the night, oh my god,” Felix rolled his eyes, but the smile that had already given him away was not easy to wipe off. “We studied for tomorrow’s test, obviously.”

“Yeah, sure.” Minho observed him for a moment, then turned his satisfied gaze on Jeongin. “And that red mark is from a mosquito, I reckon?”

All eyes turned to Jeongin in that moment, and the purplish mark faded when his whole neck flooded with blood underneath. Felix thought he himself was going to burst into flames and burn alive, shrinking under the weight of attention he hadn’t planned to attract. Especially not when the hickey was so very obviously an effect of his work, and everyone was going to know how down bad he was for Jeongin. Which was obviously true, but maybe he didn’t need everyone to know just how much.

A ghost of a smile graced Jisung’s lips, too, the boy peeking up his ears. “Wait, what? I haven’t seen it!” He grabbed Jeongin’s chin and moved it to see better, watching the hickey with so much curiosity that made Felix pray for the ground to swallow him whole.

Seungmin, who sat in the chair in the front, scoffed out a laugh, shaking his head. “Studying for the test, huh? You two are multitaskers.”

Scratching his arm, Felix tried to explain. “It wasn’t like that…”

But his boyfriend seemed rather unbothered as he leaned back to prop himself on his hands behind him, smiling casually. “You know what they say, physical activity can serve as a mnemotechnic. It’s all for the greater good.”

Felix glanced at him in shock, speechless. There used to be a time when Jeongin would have stammered when they talked, would have blushed and looked away when their eyes met. Now he just chuckled, biting his lip with a joyful frivolity as he stuffed his face in Felix’s hair. Such a new and fresh addition to his life, yet already a foundation where Felix felt himself falling.

”You’re lucky the bell is about to ring, you brat,” Felix managed to mumble into his ear, a laugh bubbling up despite his mortification.

The bell rang the second after, silencing the remaining classroom chatter. As if to add to his terror, Jisung pinched his cheek. “Let me know if it works,” he said with a wink, before walking away to his desk with a delighted chuckle.

Jeongin gave him a brief kiss and an apologetic smile, just when the teacher entered the class and they all had to take their seats. Felix plopped on his chair with a resigned sigh, already missing his warmth. Heavens, it was almost like he had become an addict. Nobody could blame him for that, though, it was not his fault his boyfriend was such a sweetheart. He followed him with his eyes until he took the seat, his dark hair shimmering in the sunlight flooding from the window. Such a pretty sight.

His mother texted him somewhere after the second period, asking if he had arrived at school. Together with Jeongin, they went to the water filling station and as they stood in a small queue, he felt a brief vibration in his pocket. The reaction that bubbled inside him as he read the message was something between a scoff and a sigh, ending with nothing more than a simple ‘yes’, which he  texted her before stuffing his phone back inside his jeans’ pocket.

His frown and knitted eyebrows didn’t go unnoticed by Jeongin.

“Everything alright, sweets?” he murmured, leaning close so his voice wouldn’t carry past the three other students waiting for water. He gently nudged Felix’s hip with his own.

“Yeah, it’s just… mom,” sighed Felix, running a hand through his hair. He leaned slightly into his chest, seeking the familiar comfort. 

Jeongin responded instantly and invited him closer, giving his shoulder a soothing rub. “Nothing bad, right?” he asked with concern.

Felix shook his head and uncapped his bottle. “No, just wanted to know if I arrived,” he scoffed, then bent down to refill. 

He barely wanted to think about it, about that ridiculous behaviour his mother was showing off. First she throws him out of the flat, tells him not to come, and now she asks if he arrived at school? He couldn’t believe it was real. He barely knew whether to laugh or cry.

His features must have shown his internal agitation, because Jeongin pulled him back into his embrace as soon as they were done with water.

“Don’t let her get to you,” Jeongin murmured immediately, rubbing circles into Felix’s shoulder. “It’s not worth your stress, okay? You’ve already got enough of it.”

​“Yeah, I know, it’s just—” Felix took a deep breath, squeezed his eyes shut, leaning completely into the familiar pressure of Jeongin’s chest as they walked. “I just can’t understand her deal. It’s madness, isn’t it? This— whatever she’s doing.”

​Jeongin tightened his arms around him, letting out a soft sigh that rumbled in his chest, a sound of shared frustration. “It is, Lix. Absolute madness. But you don’t have to deal with it now, okay?” His fingers brushed under his chin, moving it enough to allow Felix to see his gentle smile. “You have much more important things to take care of today, don’t you?”

Felix gave a small nod, allowing his own smile to return. By the looks of it, right now they must have been one of the clingiest couples at school, but Felix didn’t mind. Attention had never bothered him, especially not here. Besides, he couldn’t imagine it being another way. They both clung to each other like two cuddled penguins—Felix was pretty sure he had seen something about such behaviour while scrolling through Tik Tok—as if requiring warmth for survival. And the longer Felix experienced that soothing effect Jeongin’s embrace always had on him, the more convinced he grew of the fact that without it he would have fallen to pieces.

“I’ll have to leave you at lunch. That’s when Mr. Cheung wants to see me,” he said, shaking off the uneasiness caused by his mother. He wasn’t going to allow her to destroy another one of his days, not this time. Not after Jeongin had managed to make it better since the very start of the morning.

“I’m curious what it’s about. You really don’t know?” Jeongin asked, leading them towards the Biology classroom. His face expressed genuine interest, his eyebrows knitted just a tad—the kind of attention Felix chugged down like an addict.

“No, not really.” He shook his head. “He never says in advance what’s on his mind.”

“Well then, I guess we’ll see each other later. I hope you won’t miss me too much,” Jeongin teased, and his eyes crinkled with joy.

Felix scoffed out a laugh and tried to push him away, at which he failed miserably. “I bet you’ll be the one to miss me.” Tucked closer to his chest, he reached to squeeze his cheek. “Can’t stay away from me for too long, can you?”

Jeongin glanced around the corridor, a grin stretching his mouth. Felix followed his gaze too, a little confused, especially as he couldn’t see anything—just the usual students roaming around, not paying them any attention, already heading towards their next class. But before he managed to understand, Jeongin’s eyes were back on him, filled with dangerous glimmers that made his heart jump up to his throat.

​“You know what, maybe I can’t.” Jeongin chuckled, grabbing his waist as he took a step closer.

“Hey, what are you—” Felix didn’t manage to finish as the boy guided them into a corner, making him step back until he was pinned against the wall. He stared at him wide-eyed in surprise, feeling all words die in his throat.

Jeongin gripped his hips with a cocky smirk, leaning in closer. “You said you’ll leave me at lunch, didn’t you? I fear I miss you already.”

“I’m right here,” Felix chuckled, observing him fondly. Jeongin had cornered him between a row of lockers and some doors, the place doing hardly any job at shielding them from other people. But he couldn’t care less about anyone who could see them, not with his heart beating faster as butterflies filled his stomach.

“I know,” Jeongin said and tilted his head, giving him puppy eyes. “But one last kiss maybe? Just in case I miss you too much.”

Felix felt his knees going rigid. He stared at him hypnotized, while his hands traveled up to his nape as if from memory, getting lost in the strands. 

“Fine. Only because you asked nicely, okay?” With a smile, he pulled his boyfriend closer, giving him a quick, sweet peck. A shy one, unsure because of their surroundings.

“Mmm, I don’t know.” Beaming against his lips, Jeongin wrapped his arms around him tighter. “Let me try again.”

The world spun around Felix as Jeongin crashed their lips together. He nearly moaned out of surprise, every nerve alive with both excitement and the awareness of anyone who might see them. Someone would probably think they were crazy—but Felix didn’t care. All that mattered was how good Jeongin’s lips felt, how delightful was the feeling of being held in Jeongin’s arms, sending electric circuits down his body. He wrapped his hands around Jeongin’s neck and pulled him closer, drowning in the sensation. If they continued like that, he was soon going to lose his breath.

Being kissed in such a way, in a place where people could see, thrilled him more than it should. He could barely find it in himself to feel ashamed, lost too deep in the way Jeongin’s hands held him. His back was flushed against the wall, and Jeongin’s hair felt so soft under his fingers. When their tongues met, it turned wet and slick, with sounds that would have repelled him if he heard them coming from somebody else. But right now, they were theirs, and somehow those sounds were the hottest in existence.

The next sound that left his mouth was a loud squeak when he felt Jeongin’s lips move to his neck.

“Hey!” His cheeks flushed red, and he burst into giggles, panicked, suddenly more than aware of their surroundings.

Jeongin just hummed against his skin and gripped his hips tighter, bringing him closer. Felix thought his brain was going to erupt. It was hard to hold his ground, hard to choose between melting away and keeping his dignity.

“Ayen, we’re at school…” he gasped.

“Oh sweet heavens, is that you, Yang Jeongin?”

They snapped out of the kiss immediately, pulling away in terror. The clicking of Mrs. Kim’s heels must have blended in with the casual noise of the break. There was no mistaking her now. She stood right behind them with a glare that could kill.

With his cheeks burning, Felix blinked in confusion, caught like a deer in headlights. He was ready to face Mrs. Kim once again, to explain himself—but to his surprise, the woman wasn’t even looking at him, all of her fire directed fully at Jeongin.

​“Have you lost your mind to—to—to distract the school president like that, Mr. Yang?” she shrieked in outrage, her eyes ready to throw daggers. “Don’t you have a class to attend?”

​He glanced up at Jeongin and had to suppress an amused scoff when he noticed the mess on his head. His hair was all ruffled from Felix’s doing, sticking up a little and covering his forehead. And his lips were no better, puffy and glistening, all because of Felix. Definitely not the best way to present oneself in front of a teacher.

​Jeongin’s hand was reluctant when it left Felix’s hip, lingering there for a second longer before he turned fully to face Mrs. Kim. “I’m sorry, Seonsaengnim, but we’re in the same class…”

An amused glint sparked in his eyes, as if uncaring of whatever Mrs. Kim had in stock for him. Felix couldn’t believe his relaxed stance, the way he turned around so casually, barely stepping away from him. His boyfriend was out of his mind, testing dangerous waters, and for some reason it was making his skin burn.

“I don’t care if you’re in the same class, Mr. Yang! I care that you’re in the same hallway!” Mrs. Kim’s voice rose to a screech, her cheeks, neck, and even chest glowing with a red flush. Felix got the impression she was more ashamed than angry.

Jeongin lifted his hands as if calming a lion, taking a step forward. “Seonsaengnim, I can explain…”

Some students had stopped what they were doing just to observe the scene or simply cast interested glances as they passed. Felix’s gaze switched in that direction for a brief second, yet enough to notice Hyunjin staring from where he stood next to a vending machine. Felix resisted the urge to roll his eyes, knowing too well he was going to talk his ears off later.

“Oh, I have no doubts you can explain.” Mrs. Kim cut him off, her voice laced with heavy sarcasm. “And you will have plenty of time to explain it to yourself when you pass this afternoon in detention.”

Blood drained from Jeongin’s face as his eyes flew wide open, staring at the woman in disbelief. “B-but—wait—what?”

“Exactly that, Mr. Yang.” She took a sharp, final breath, heaving. “I’m done with your behaviour. First you make sure to be late to half of my classes and now you pull Mr. Lee into your antics?” She raised her hands in the air, waved him off frantically. “Oh no, I’ve had enough.”

Felix didn’t know what to do, his heart was pounding in his chest. First of all, he was surprised the woman had barely acknowledged him, focused solely on his boyfriend—although maybe he shouldn’t be surprised, considering all those times when Jeongin had gotten on her bad side. Besides, he barely had any idea what he could do, as it was mostly between Jeongin and her, without the principal even being involved. If she reckoned Jeongin deserved detention, then so it had to be, and if any of them argued, the consequences would only worsen.

Not to mention the fact that Jeongin had lost his mind kissing him like that in the first place, in the middle of the school corridor out of all places. Felix felt like he was no better for not stopping him, oh god, being the one to kiss him first instead. But who could blame him for enjoying the way his boyfriend always made his knees weak? It was just how things worked, how the world had been created. The biology teacher would have a good explanation for such a reaction, Felix supposed there might be some specific hormones responsible for…

​“Can I trust you two to get to your next class unchaperoned, or must I drag you both there myself?” Mrs. Kim’s thin eyebrows rose into spiked arches, almost theatrical in different circumstances.

​Felix finally got back a grasp of himself and bowed low, placing his hand on Jeongin’s nape just to make sure he did the same. He wasn’t sure if he trusted him anymore, not with that cocky attitude the boy had been showing off recently. Completely unlike his quiet-nerd personality before, but this was his concern for later.

​“We’re truly sorry, Mrs. Kim. This won’t happen again,” Felix spoke in a solemn voice, feeling the need to finally step in.

​Thank heavens, Jeongin followed suit and bowed even lower than him. Unable to see his face, Felix could only hope the boy had restraint from making faces.

“We can be trusted, Seonsaengnim.” Jeongin’s tone was respectful, yet laced with something Felix easily recognized as a taste of amusement. He couldn’t believe he was still playing, in front of Mrs. Kim out of all damn people. “I’ll see to Mr. Lee getting back to class safely.”

Oh, Felix was going to kill him.

The comment seemed to infuriate Mrs. Kim, even though she had barely recovered from her previous outrage. If gazes could throw daggers, Jeongin would have been a dead man.

​“That’s enough, Mr. Yang. One more word, and I’m taking you to the principal.” Her gaze lingered on him for a long moment, making Jeongin bow for yet another time, before switching to Felix. “Mr. Lee, I trust you will make sure you two get to your class without incident,” she said, keeping a firm stare, then her eyelid twitched. “But I swear, if I see something like this happen again… there will be consequences.”

Words barely came out of him as he reassured her they would behave, his body barely moving when they bowed yet again. Keeping his distance from Jeongin, he turned away, burning under the gaze of both the teacher and nearby students. It followed them until they disappeared around the corner, allowing him to breathe a sigh of relief.

“Goodness, I didn’t expect her there at all,” Felix said, trying to calm himself down. Blood rushed through his veins from all the emotional commotion, and it didn’t seem like it was going to cool down anytime soon.

Jeongin didn’t improve his situation at all, bursting out with laughter as soon as they were out of sight. “C’mon, this was fun. Have you seen how red she was?” he asked, wrapping one arm around him.

“Fun?” Felix stared at him in disbelief, eyebrows shooting up. “Jeongin, you got detention! That’ll be on your applications, don’t you realize?” He shook his head, not even trying to brush his arm off his shoulders. “And you didn’t hear her coming? Isn’t that what your spider-senses are for?” He arched an accusatory eyebrow.

Jeongin rolled his eyes, and his smirk only widened. “Oh, forgive me, dear president, my senses were very busy.”

“Sure, busy getting us in trouble,” Felix murmured under his breath, resisting the urge to push the boy away. “Did you really have to rile her up like that? I’m sure the last thing you want today is to be stuck in detention all afternoon.”

Jeongin’s mouth stretched into a grimace as he remembered his penalty. The vision of spending the afternoon locked in a classroom must be just as unwelcome as Felix imagined—especially for his boyfriend, so used to roaming around the city, careless, free, and dedicated to the one thing that truly mattered when he wasn’t at school. Even though Felix knew it wasn’t Jeongin’s first detention caused by his frequent lateness, it was certainly no less annoying than any of the previous ones.

“Well, sure, it is pretty unfortunate,” Jeongin reasoned, leaning a little over where he was hanging around Felix, one arm draped casually across his shoulders. He tilted his head, letting his gaze linger with a mischievous glint. “But maybe the school president can come up with a good reason to get me out of there, hm?”

Felix scoffed an amused laugh, eyebrows shooting up. “And what that could possibly be, huh? There’s no way Mrs. Kim is going to let you slip this time.”

Jeongin leaned back slightly, resting his forehead against Felix’s temple and smirking. “Don’t you need help with anything after classes?” he suggested, letting his hand slide to Felix’s hip. “Carrying heavy boxes, moving chairs from class to class—I’m sure the president has his hands full at all times, doesn’t he?”

Felix crossed his arms over his chest, trying to hide the small smile tugging at his lips, and shook his head. “The only thing I need to do this afternoon is solve math equations. I doubt Mrs. Kim will give a single care about you being there to help me or not.”

He didn’t admit it out loud, but his mind was already running through possible ways to get Jeongin out of detention. Reckless as he was, Felix needed him for that last review before the test tomorrow. Besides, he felt equally responsible for the kiss. The only reason he hadn’t earned detention himself was that Jeongin had been on such bad terms with Mrs. Kim that she had barely acknowledged Felix’s presence. Perhaps she was also grateful for his help setting up the educational exhibition before Similjeol in February, though he could only assume.

Jeongin must have mistaken his hesitation for agitation as he ran a nervous hand through his hair. The other one dropped from Felix’s hip, reaching to lock their fingers instead.

“I’m sorry, I got a bit carried away. I didn’t think she was going to show up,” he explained, giving him the look of a worried puppy.

“It’s fine,” Felix sighed, allowing them to hold hands. More physical contact was probably the last thing they should be doing right now in the school hallway—even such a mild one—but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “I didn’t think about her either. I just don’t want you to get in trouble.”

Jeongin squeezed his hand, casting him a soft smile. “Don’t worry your pretty head about it, it’s just detention. I can sit it out this one time.”

His heart fluttered at the soft tone, followed by a gentle squeeze of guilt. It wasn’t fair that Jeongin had to take the whole responsibility, even if that allowed Felix to go on with his day without any consequences. He felt bad for his boyfriend having to stay after classes when he knew that deep down he must be upset about it a lot, even if he wasn’t showing it just for the sake of Felix.

“I’ll try to get you out,” he said unsurely, stopping before they could reach the classroom. Never letting go of his hand, he took one step closer, observing him with a worried frown. “Just don’t get your hopes too high, okay? I’m not sure I can do much.”

Jeongin beamed at him nonetheless. “I’m pretty sure you’ll come up with something. How could she resist whatever reason you find, right?” His thumb brushed over his knuckles as his smile softened ever so slightly. “But even if you can’t, don’t worry about it. Focus on tomorrow’s test, alright? Even when I’m not there.”

Felix felt his chest tighten at the sole image of having to sit in that library alone, hunched over his textbook with no soothing voice to guide him. It was going to be a nightmare, especially when he knew that detention was going to be the worst torture for Jeongin.

“Let’s not kiss at school again, all right? I don’t want you to get in any more trouble.” He looked up at him with a serious look.

Jeongin’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. He blinked a few slow times as if unable to process what Felix just said. “Like… not at all? Never?”

Felix raised an accusatory eyebrow. “It’s not like you could hear her coming, right? So yeah, no more kissing at school.” He considered his own words for a moment, before his voice lowered to a murmur. “At least not where the teachers can see us,” he added, hiding it soon with a short cough.

Jeongin’s face brightened at once, the mischievous grin reappearing as he swayed a little closer. “Okay, so no more kisses in the hallway, got it. But wherever else is fine, right? As long as nobody sees.”

Felix rolled his eyes, though his cheeks flushed with warmth. “That’s not exactly what I said.”

“Close enough,” Jeongin teased, stepping back with a grin that made Felix’s heart skip despite everything. “Guess I’ll have to get creative, then.”

“Keep in mind I like it best when we kiss after school,” Felix emphasized, reluctantly letting go of his hand as they reached the classroom. “So maybe start with not getting detention again.”

“It’s just a one time thing, I promise.” Jeongin whined, stepping to the side to allow Felix to go first. “As long as you don’t distract me, it won’t happen again.” He raised his arms in a gesture of surrender.

Taking a quick glance around the corridor to make sure no teachers were in sight, Felix grabbed his boyfriend by the collar with a smirk. He pulled him behind the door, right where no prying eyes could see them—for just the few seconds he needed.

Before Jeongin could even blink, Felix pressed their lips together in a quick, forceful kiss, pulling back just as fast but keeping his grip tight on the collar of his shirt. He raised a teasing eyebrow at Jeongin’s stunned expression, the poor boy caught completely off guard.

“Not distract you, huh?” Felix murmured, a satisfied smirk curling his lips. “Maybe you should work on your tingles instead.”

He intended to walk away and leave Jeongin flustered and surprised, but the boy was quick to come back to his senses. An arm wrapped around Felix’s waist, pulling him back before he could enter the classroom.

“Haven’t you just said something about kissing at school?” Jeongin teased, keeping him in place. “I must have misheard.”

Felix’s breath caught for a second at the sudden closeness, his back pressed lightly against Jeongin’s chest. The warmth of his arm around his waist didn’t help his composure at all. He could practically feel Jeongin’s smirk against his ear.

“You heard very, very well,” he murmured, wrapping his fingers around Jeongin’s arm to pry it off his waist. Even though the touch made his stomach burn. “Now c’mon, before we both get detention.”

“Oh, so you can kiss me whenever but I need to stay away? How is that fair?” Jeongin complained, making no effort to help him out of his embrace.

The prolonging amount of time Felix spent with his back against him was making his heart beat faster, even if it was just a matter of seconds.

“Yeah, because when you do it, you get us in trouble,” Felix muttered, trying not to let his voice waver as he finally pried Jeongin’s arm off his waist. “Now quit it before someone actually catches us.”

He stepped forward just enough to turn and see Jeongin leaning against the wall, not having moved an inch. If the circumstances were different, Felix felt like he would never move away like this—maybe kiss him mad instead. Whatever version of Jeongin was there—the sweet and caring one, or this waggish one—he loved them both, unable to choose between them. But maybe a mixture was just what he needed, a perfect balance between distraction and support. So hard to explain, and even harder to resist, he feared.

“Let’s get back to class, then,” Jeongin said with an arched eyebrow, never dropping his eyes from him. “Lead the way, president.”

The door was right next to them, but Felix decided not to point that out. Their gazes lingered for another heartbeat before he finally moved, grabbing the edge of the door and throwing Jeongin one last smile over his shoulder.

The teacher appeared in the corridor just as Felix crossed the threshold, her presence silencing whatever reply he might’ve had ready. Jeongin followed behind him without a word, and with one last shared glance, they both walked off to their desks—on opposite sides of the room, just like in most of their classes.

Felix plopped down reluctantly in front of Minho, his dreamy gaze finding him only after a moment, needing first to follow Jeongin to his seat. And when he finally looked, his breath hitched at the teasing smirk on Minho’s face as he waved his phone in the air pointedly.

“Somebody’s got in trouble, huh?” Minho asked, tilting the screen so Felix could see—a photo of him and Jeongin in the corridor, sent by Hyunjin in their group chat.

Burying his face in his hands, all Felix could do was let out a resigned groan—and maybe wish the walls would swallow him up, just for the sake of his sanity.

As long as you don’t distract me, the words reverberated in his head.

Oh, shut up, Yang Jeongin. Just shut the hell up.