Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You were freezing. Your hooded onesie did little to protect you from the cool spring night, and the socks covering your feet did no good. The melting snow served as the remnants of winter, dampening the ground, and wetting your socks.

Your throat hurt, and your feet ached from all the walking. You don’t remember how long you’d been wandering, nor do you remember what the source of your throat pain was. Perhaps, it was raw from screaming, or maybe, the chilly weather was getting to you.

Your head was pounding due to a fall you suffered. That injury was a result of not watching where you were going as you fled, too focused on getting to safety to be mindful of your steps.

You rubbed at your watery eyes, the harsh winds drying your tears. You wanted to go home, but at this point, you had little memory of where that was. All you knew was that you were lying in bed one minute, struggling to sleep as your baby sister’s cries filled your shared room while your parents’ arguments bled through the walls. And the next, you were running away from your house, rapidly being consumed by blue flames.

You cried out as something impaled your foot, sending you to the ground as blood began to darken your dirtied white sock. You tried to get up, but a searing pain shot through your foot when you put weight on it, forcing you to remain in place. The fatigue you felt didn’t help matters in the slightest.

Your body began to tremble as you lay on the cold ground, grass and persistent clumps of snow sticking to your onesie. Your eyes grew heavy, but you were scared to close them. Your surroundings seemed to grow darker, heightening your fear.

Was this it? Had you run for nothing?

Maybe, it was better this way. You wouldn’t have lasted too much longer on your own, and if you gave into your tiredness, you could see your family again. Your parents hadn’t always been the kindest, but they were the only blood you had. And possibly, the afterlife would teach them compassion, and you all could have a second chance to be a true family, like the ones you saw on TV.

Perhaps it would be better if you permitted your eyes to close. There was nothing for you in the realm of the living, but you had people waiting for you on the other side.
You allowed your eyes to flutter shut, the faint sound of footsteps approaching not registering with you.

******

You awoke with a cough, which soon turned into a fit of sorts. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop coughing. Your throat was painfully dry, and the hacking only irritated it further.

Within minutes, a door swung open, revealing a small woman who looked to be in her 50s. Her greying black hair was piled on top of her head, and she wore a traditional kimono. On seeing the stranger, you realized you were no longer lying in the grass, but on a couch next to a blazing fire.

You cried out at the sight of the flames, foggy memories of burning heat resurfacing.

“It’s okay, dear, you’re safe!” the woman called out, hurrying to your side and handing you a glass of water.

You accepted and downed the cool liquid without thinking twice, soothing your parched mouth. When the cup was empty, you returned it to the woman, your cough quieting.

“Better?” she asked, placing it on the coffee table.

You nodded. “Yes.”

Your voice came out scratched, the disuse of it making it hard to talk. You noted your cut foot was now bandaged, and the stinging pain had disappeared. Your head still hurt, however.

“Good,” she said with a warm smile that put you at ease. “Now, I found you passed out on the path to the village. Can you tell me what happened?”

What did happen? Your brows furrowed as you tried to recall how you got into this predicament, but all you could remember were two things.

“There was a shadow...then a fire.”

Concern filled her large brown eyes. “There was a fire?”

You bobbed your head again. “The flames were blue.”

“You were wandering the forest…because of blue fire?” she questioned, confusion entering her voice. “Where are your parents, dear?”

“Dead.”

You’d heard their pained screams and hadn’t seen them escape. Tears welled in your eyes, a sob leaving you as you realized your baby sister met the same fate. She’d been the only one not to judge you, but you’d forgotten all about her in your frenzy.

“…Where are you from, sweetie?”

You shrugged and swiped at your eyes, unable to recall the name of your town. “I dunno.”

“…. Why don’t you get some rest, then we’ll travel to the city and bring you to the police in the morning?”

Your eyes widened, and you frantically shook your head. “No!”

The last time you’d interacted with the police, they’d taken you away from your home and brought you to a dirty mansion, filled with creepy crawlies and mean people.

She jumped, the volume of your voice taking her aback. “Okay, okay. I’ll just bring you to the village doctor tomorrow.”

“No police?”

“No police,” she confirmed, reaching into her pocket and producing a handkerchief, dabbing at your watery eyes. “Will you be comfortable staying here until we find a solution, sweetie?” You thought for a moment, then nodded. She was nice. The corners of her lips turned upward. “Okay, dear. Now, can you tell me your name?”

You tensed at the question. What was your name? Even before you ran, your given name was so rarely used, that it began to fade from memory. Your parents only called you girl, your teachers always referred to you as a troublemaker or a fibber, and your classmates labeled you a freak.

It didn’t help that reading and writing was a challenge. The words always appeared blurry and jumbled, and the way the pronunciation was explained made little sense to you.

You did, however, remember your family name, which you mumbled to the kind old lady.

She frowned when she heard, but still tried to mimic how you pronounced it, absolutely butchering it. “Sweetie, where is your family from?”

You shrugged. You, Mommy, and Daddy didn’t look like everyone else, but you didn’t know where they came from. Perhaps, they were born in Japan like you, as Japanese was the only language spoken at home.

“I dunno,” you whispered, fearing she’d grow angry at your ignorance.

The adults in your life always did. You were behind other kids your age, unable to comprehend what should be simple.

The woman, though, only smiled kindly at you. “Can I pick a name for you, dear, until you do remember?”

You doubt that’d happen. As much as their insults stung, you knew those that called you stupid weren’t wrong, evidenced by your poor memory.

Still, you nodded, and her smile only grew. You relaxed, the warmth she’d shown you comforting. “How about Izumi?”

“Izumi?” you repeated, testing the word on your tongue.

“It means spring,” she revealed. “Because I found you in the spring, that’s what you’ll be called.”

Izumi. You liked it. It was pretty, and you knew it was more traditional than your birth name. That was another point of contention at school, and your struggle to spell and pronounce it hadn’t helped.

“And I’m Rie,” she continued. You again mimicked her words, blushing as her smile grew. “That’s right!”

You shifted at her praise, unsure how to handle it. You knew how to deal with insults, not compliments, so you chose to redirect the topic of conversation.

“H-how long was I out?”

“I found you a few hours ago, sweetie. You didn’t have seemed to be passed out for long.”

“…Thank you for saving me.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “Of course! I couldn’t allow a child to freeze, any person with a heart wouldn’t.”

You shrugged. You’d met many adults that you wouldn’t trust to save you, so you didn’t see it as a guarantee. Rei’s kindness was a luxury you hadn’t experienced before, so you most certainly wouldn’t take it for granted.

******

The next day, you walk hand-in-hand with Rei, trying to ignore the questioning stares from the villagers milling about. As you’d arrived in a dirtied onesie, Rei had to provide you with some clothing, the ill-fitting garments only drew more attention to you. It was a small town, probably housing no more than two hundred or so folks, with the paths not even being paved. Many of the buildings seemed to be traditional Japanese houses, save for a tiny schoolhouse and clinic. Japanese Cedar trees towered over the buildings, providing ample shade.

“W-where are we, Rei?”

Your location had been on your mind since you woke up, and seeing how small and rural Rei’s hometown is made you wonder how far you’d wandered. The town you’re from was small, with only about 5000 people, but it didn’t compare to this village. You doubted it was even on the map.

“Kuroki, sweetie.”

You nodded, quickly becoming distracted as a small humanoid-insect hybrid zipped past you. It wasn’t the first time you’d seen them, as the creatures frequented many areas of your town. However, every time you came across them, you were unsettled. Beyond just looking so odd, no one else ever acknowledged their presence.

No one ever believed you when you spoke of the monstrous beings you saw, so you’d learned to keep your mouth shut. So, when the thing settled on Rei’s shoulder, you tensed but kept silent. She rolled her shoulder at the newfound weight, a frown settling on her face.

You knew better than to take that as a sign that it was visible to her. You’d learned the hard way that being affected by one of the beings wasn’t a sign that they saw it. Strangely enough, only you saw them, but everyone seemed to be able to sense their presence.

“How’s your foot?” Rei asked as you two neared the clinic.

You perked up, the question presenting an opportunity.

“C-can I…lean against you?” you mumbled, your face flushing as you voiced the question.

Asking for help with such a simple action made you feel childish, but it had to be done. You weren’t comfortable touching her shoulder without explicit permission.

Rei faltered as sympathy entered her face. “Are you in so much pain, sweetie?”

Your foot wasn’t happy to be moving, and you’d been walking with a limp since your injury. However, that wasn’t the reason for your request. No, you wanted to get rid of that stupid monster.

Therefore, you nodded and did your best expression of puppy eyes. You probably looked ridiculous, but you’d learned to steel your face, not soften it. Former adults in your life didn’t take well to your attempts to gain their compassion, so you often tried to project the strength they expected from you. But Rei seemed different.

“Okay,” she said, stopping in her tracks. You didn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around her shoulder, her short height making the action easy. The monster was now grabbable, so you flung it off her shoulder, trying not to giggle at the squeak it made. She put her arm around you, and the two of you resumed walking. “Better?”

“Much,” you confirmed, glaring at the flying abomination as it buzzed away before it stopped in front of a boy who looked to be about your age.

He was covered in dirt and his hair was tousled as if he’d been rolling around in the mud. He looked tall for his age, but he was thin, and even through the grime you could tell he had a babyface.

His eyes followed the thing, as did yours. When he realized what you were looking at, he soon turned to you with an agape mouth. Your brows furrowed before your eyes widened as you realized what he just did, your mouth falling open as you and Rei entered the small but modern clinic.

He looked directly at the monster. He could see them, too.

Never had you met anyone else who could also see them, so the fact that that boy had boggled your mind.

“Okay, we’re here, sweetie,” Rei announced, snapping you out of your stupor.

“Okay,” you murmur, taking a seat as she approached a nurse.

The clinic was incredibly small, only having about six chairs scattered throughout the small waiting room, stationed around a door that presumably leads to the exam rooms.

The two women chitchat for a minute before Rei was handed a clipboard with a form. You couldn’t help but notice the nurse’s disgruntled expression as she gave you a wary stare, putting you on edge. You already weren’t a fan of doctors. You hated the way they examined you so closely and the questions they’d asked you, ones that would inevitably anger your parents if you answered truthfully.

A large shadow whizzed by, making you even more rigid, and the nurse quickly looked away as it inched closer to her.

“How old are you, sweetie?” Rei questioned, not looking away from the clipboard.

You froze, thinking for a moment. Your eyes began to water as you struggled to think of the answer to such a simple question. Your birthdays were never celebrated, and you were in a lower grade than you should be, making the answer unclear.

Rei, having taken note of your silence, raised her head to look at you. “Do you know, Izumi?”

You bit back a sob as you shook your head, embarrassment making your cheeks flame. You should know, but for the life of you, you couldn’t conjure the answer. That was the case with most basic information about yourself, and it made you feel utterly stupid.

“…Can you give me an estimate, sweetie?”

You thought again, before swiping your eyes and nodding. “I think I should be in third grade.”

It wasn’t the answer she was searching for, but the grade you were supposed to be in should hint toward your age.

“So…you should be about eight or nine?”

Hesitantly, you nodded again. That range sounded about right.

She scribbled something down on the board and flipped the papers to the next page. “I’m going to read off some symptoms, okay? Just nod if it applies to you, shake your head if it doesn’t.”

Okay, that sounded simple enough.

“Any allergies?”

You shook your head no.

“Do you have any conditions, sweetie?”

You pause, before shaking your head.

For such a small town, you would’ve thought seeing a doctor would be an in-and-out process. But that wasn’t the case. The questionnaire continued for an ungodly amount of time with no being the answer for everything. Save for fatigue, headaches, and bone, joint, or muscle pain/weakness.

Then, she got to the mental health section.

“Uhm, there are some…difficult questions a part of the screening process. Are you comfortable with answering them?”

You tried to get a peak at the paper, but the words were all muddled together, so it proved to be moot. Seeing as you didn’t know the nature of the questions, you decided to take a leap of faith and give your permission.

“Sure.”

At your confirmation, she took a breath, then read the first one. “In the past few weeks, have you wished you were dead?”

Oh.

You opened your mouth, then closed it again, Memories of the previous night flood your mind, of how you accepted your death when all seemed hopeless, of the way you wished you could fall asleep and never awake as your parents screamed at each other. Deciding that was applicable, you gave a single nod.

Rei stiffened, before checking off a box. You averted your gaze, staring at the main door and jumping when it suddenly burst open. The little boy from before ran in, pausing as he set sights on you, before dashing to the nurse.

“Mama,” he greeted, just loud enough for you to hear.

“Have you ever made…any plans, sweetie?” Rei asked, returning your attention to her.

You shook your head. You’d contemplated throwing yourself from your classroom window when the bullying got too bad, but your fear of heights always got the best of you.

She returned to her form, and you set your sight back on the boy, who was being given a talking to by his mother. The earlier incident piqued your interest, as the prospect of knowing someone like you was exciting. Maybe, if he saw them too, he’d be like Rei and make you feel welcome.

Maybe, if Rei allowed it, you could turn this village into the home you’d never had.

Chapter Text

You missed being outside. It’d been too long since you were able to bask in the sunlight or feel raindrops pelting your skin. As a child, you preferred the safety of your bedroom and seldom went outside. Now, if you had the chance, you’d spend every waking moment surrounded by nature. It was torturous, being kept in a dark room, breathing stale air with little to do but draw.

Sticks of charcoal were the one kindness they – he – allowed you. You were never given many sheets of paper, so when you ran out, you made the walls and floor your canvas. Mayhap, it was another sign of your madness. You certainly imagined that you must look insane, scribbling on every surface within reach.

It was the only thing to do, however, and the only way you had a modicum of sanity.

Often, you wondered why they didn’t just let you die. It’d be a relief for everyone, yourself included. But perhaps, the village’s misguided religious beliefs dictated that they shouldn’t directly kill you. No, they should allow you to wither away until you did the deed yourself.

And Kai had his own unique motivations for keeping you alive.

The only source of light you had were small windows that were too high and tiny for an escape to be possible. Without them, you’d be completely in the dark and have no way to keep track of the passing of time.

You knew that increased rain signified spring’s arrival, longer days equaled summer, and that snow meant winter had come. Fall was the hardest time of year for you to tell, as it blended the elements of all three seasons. It was rainier than in summer, the sun stayed out longer than it did in winter, and the first snowfall often happened in the autumn months. Thus, you simplified your year into spring, summer, and winter, crossing the blasted season out completely.

As silly as it was, analyzing the weather was one of the few activities possible in your cell, and reminded you that an outside world existed. It was easy to forget that. You’d been trapped so long that you’d forgotten what fresh air was like, that your mind had begun to rot, and loneliness was a constant fact of life.

The only other humans you saw disdained you so much that they loathed giving you enough substance to sustain your life.

Except for Kai. He’d always have a scowl on his face, but he provided you with more than enough nourishment to hold you over. And when he was in a good mood, he replenished your charcoal when it started to dwindle.

You suppose Kai’s care was a holdover from when you two were friends.

Footsteps approached your door, and you perked up. It was feeding day. Thank God, because you were starving.

As if on cue, your stomach loudly growled as the door creaked open, revealing Kai. His towering height filled up the doorframe, almost forcing him to duck as he entered your room with a tray, consisting of grilled fish, white rice, and a simple spinach salad. He’d prepared some green tea for you, a luxury that only he provided. You knew it was chilled from the lack of steam. You didn’t mind, though. Your food and drink were always cold so you couldn’t weaponize the heat, and your chopsticks were always too dull to cause injury.

“Thank you,” you murmured as he set the tray down on the cot, the thin mattress doubling as a table and a bed.

Your voice was croaky and dry, so the first thing you reached for was the tea. You hummed in approval as the taste coated your tongue, a hint of lemon providing a refreshing burst.

His grunt was the only signal that he’d heard you, and let you get a read on his mood.

He was still thin and tall with a baby face, and his dark hair was always long and messy, but his deep-set eyes were filled with a sadness that wasn’t present when you two were children. It always made you guilty, as you knew you were the cause of it.

You had no idea how to repent for what you did. If spending almost a decade in solitary confinement wasn’t enough, nothing ever would be.

“Wait,” you said as he began to retreat. He paused and looked back at you with a cocked brow. You shrunk under his heavy stare. Despite his little gestures of kindness, you knew he also held disdain for you. Still, you summoned the courage you only had with him and reached for your last stick of charcoal, holding it up to him. “I’m almost out.”

His eyes narrowed. “Okay?”

You deflated and began fiddling with the charcoal, staining your hands. If he didn’t get you anymore, you wouldn’t even have your drawings to distract you.

“C-can you get me some more?” you whispered.

You hated it when he was like this, so cold and callous. You knew what you did to him was unforgivable, but didn’t it mean anything that you two used to be best friends? That you inevitably saved him from meeting your fate?

“I’ll see,” he gritted out with a scowl.

The space next to you darkened, and Kai’s face contorted into an even deeper frown. He was always able to see what you could, but unlike when you were children, it now drove a wedge between you two. He didn’t want to be cursed like you.

“Please,” you said, standing up and cautiously approaching him. His eyes flickered over your malnourished body, made too visible due to the small white gown clinging to your figure. “It’s all I have to do.”

“And whose fault is that?”

“The village,” you snapped, not appreciating his insinuation. It had been an accident, and your only intention had been to protect him. “I’m not asking for much, Kai, I just want some charcoal.”

At his name, his face softened, and he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. You knew your hair was a mess, as there was no point for you to groom it. He allowed his hand to linger on your cheek, and even as you tensed up, you couldn’t help but lean into his touch. As uncomfortable as it could be, he was the reason you had any physical contact with another human.

“Ask me again,” he demanded, thumbing at the skin under your eyes.

Not only did his causal touch make you uneasy, but it confused you. Even on days that he seemed to wish you were dead, he liked to touch you. Sometimes, his hands ventured to places even you didn’t dare touch.

“Please, Kai,” you breathed, forcing your body to relax as his expression became more neutral. Even as your heart violently beat against your ribcage, you willed your second shadow to stay away, knowing its presence would only anger him. “I’d appreciate it if you got me some charcoal.”

His hand migrated to your chin, and his thumb brushed over your lower lip. “I’ll bring some next time I come.” His eyes again scanned your body, lingering on your breasts. The room’s cool air hardened your nipples, making them strain against the thin fabric. “I’ll wash you, too.”

Your stomach twisted up in knots, but you nodded and forced a smile. “Thank you, Kai.”

When you were first imprisoned, he would simply provide you with supplies to clean yourself. But as the two of you grew older, he insisted that he’d be the one to scrub you clean of grime. You hated it, as his hands always seemed to wander. You always endured it, though, even if you always cried afterward.

The corners of his lips turned up at your words. “You’re welcome,” he murmured, bringing his face closer to yours.

He leaned down and brushed his lips over yours. Nausea churned in your belly, but you allowed him to kiss you. Because if you refused him, you’d be in an even worse predicament. The one time you had, a single apple had replaced the meals he usually brought you on feeding day, robbing you of liquid and charcoal until you groveled to him.

You breathed a sigh of relief when he pulled away and managed to return the smile now gracing his face.

“Finish eating,” he ordered, stepping away from you. “I’ll be back later to get the tray.”

You nodded, relieved that he’d not only stopped at a kiss and that he wouldn’t allow your tray to sit in the corner until flies began to congregate. He’d done so before when he got particularly upset with you.

You returned to your food as he left your room, even though your appetite had disappeared. However, you still forced the food down, knowing that you couldn’t afford to rob your body of any nutrients.

You’d contemplated starving yourself to death before, but you could never bring yourself to do it. Why, you weren’t entirely sure, because the afterlife couldn’t be worse than the land of the living. Yet, something in you refused to allow yourself to be the cause of your demise, even though you had no fear of dying. Because while you wouldn’t resist death’s embrace, you also wouldn’t be the one to initiate it.

Chapter Text

When you were a child, you’d always heard that wisdom came with age. It was the reason you were told to never question adults. They knew more than a mere child ever could, so why would you doubt their words?

You used to look forward to growing up, as you’d believed that all your troubles would disappear. If youth was the cause of ignorance, surely when you were older, you’d have the knowledge to deal with all your problems. Not only would you be wise, but everything that plagued you would be gone.

How wrong you were.

Instead of your problems disappearing, of you growing surer of what to do, the opposite happened. The older you grew, the more ignorant you became of the outside world, and the less sure you were about everything. Being confined in a single room, located in a minute village, kept you sheltered, and robbed you of the opportunity of growth.

You suppose that was the side effect of imprisonment, as jailors had no reason to be concerned with the knowledgeability of their inmates.

A tick formed in your jaw as you thought about your circumstances. You applied more pressure to the charcoal, creating a too-dark spot in the lake you were drawing. You were wasting away, giving you little reason to remain alive other than sheer stubbornness.

A shriek made your hand freeze and your body tense, the charcoal slipping from your hand as you’re startled by booming steps approaching your door. As they drew closer, another shadow entered your sight, one cast by a person not there. You’d long ago accepted the shadow’s presence, now viewing it as a personification of all your negative emotions. So, though the sight of it makes you frown, you do little else, the commotion outside of your door far more pressing.

Kai fed you yesterday, and he shouldn’t be coming for another couple of days. Unless he decided to bathe you early…But still, even if it was feeding day or he deemed your dirtiness such a pressing issue, there shouldn’t be such a ruckus in the quiet village.

You glanced around your room for a weapon as the noise drew closer, your body tensing as you prepared yourself for a fight. However, the closeness of the racket allowed you to better make out what was going on. The sound of crying children lowered your defenses, though your heart still beat against your ribcage.

Memories of when you were first imprisoned began to enter your mind. Before you could become consumed by them, you heard the deadbolt lock being unfastened, and the door burst open. An older man wearing a kimono entered, followed by Kai, who tightly clutched the arms of two little girls. They were identical to one another, except for their differently colored hair. Tears were streaming down their faces, and they were hiccupping from the force of their sobs.

You were frozen, unable to do anything as they were thrown onto the floor, neither man sparing you a glance.

The lighter-haired of the girls looked up at the man, her small body trembling. “I’m so-”

“Silence,” the graying man boomed, aiming a hate-filled glare her way.

Your shadow started to grow frantic at the commotion, drawing attention to you, and you can’t help but to shrink under their heavy gazes. Not being able to bear the other man’s glower, you look at Kai, though he didn’t look much friendlier.

“What’s going on,” you muttered, wishing your voice could be stronger at this moment. You looked at the girls, who were tightly clutching each other. “Why are they here?”

Kai looked at the man before answering, only continuing when he got a nod of approval. “You have company now.”

“But why?”

“Because they’re abominations like you,” the older barked, restarting the girls’ sobs.

You couldn’t stop the sneer that spread across your face, nor could you stop the anger that surged through you when you saw the disgusted expression Kai directed at them. He was also no different than you, yet instead of vouching for those like him, he threw them under the bus so he could remain free.

You had so many words you wanted to say, but you held your tongue, knowing the trouble you’d get in. Luckily, you need not say anything else, as the two exited the small room soon after.

You were now alone with two scared children, and you called on every ounce of strength you had to be able to comfort them. You were in their shoes, once, and all you wanted was someone to console you. Even at your age, you still often longed for that, so you could only imagine how they felt.

“D-do you two want to lay down?”

It was a weak attempt to initiate conversation, and it was said so quietly that they didn’t even hear. After some seconds ticked by, you hesitantly set your supplies aside and stood from the cot, slowly creeping toward them. You didn’t want to startle them, but you needed to do something. Their tears were making your heartache.

When they were within arm’s reach, you crouched and gently placed a hand on both of their shoulders, the contact making them jump. They look at you with fear-filled eyes, and you forced yourself to look as non-threatening as possible, even summoning a smile despite your lack of joy.

“I’m Izumi,” you whispered, not wanting to startle them further by being too loud. “What are your names?”

The blonde one blinked at you, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “Why are we here, Izumi?”

It was a question you pondered many times, and you’d simply concluded that the townspeople were hateful and ignorant. You didn’t think that this was a situation where honesty was called for, though, as that’d only increase their fear.

“The villagers…are scared of what they don’t understand,” you finally stated.

Truth be told, you didn’t understand the supernatural affliction that plagued you, yet you felt their actions went overboard. If they didn’t deem you enough of a threat to kill, there was no reason to keep you locked away like a dangerous beast.

“W-will they let us go?”

You swallowed and averted your gaze, offering a halfhearted shrug. “I…Maybe.”

You weren’t sure what happened to land them here, but if they were already being lumped with you, chances were slim that they’d go free anytime soon.

“They won’t,” the brunette muttered softly, seeming to pick her your hesitance better than her sister.

“Their actions are unpredictable,” you breathed after a moment, flinching as the blonde started to sniffle. “T-they may take mercy on you and let you go.”

“How long have you been here?”

It seemed like an eternity, but if your estimates were correct, it was approaching nine years. That was how many winters have passed with you trapped in a tiny cell.“…A while.”

The three of you fell into the silence, tears streaming down their faces, though their sobs had died down. Ways to comfort them evaded your mind, so all you could do was sit beside them as they cried.

******

Though you wouldn’t wish your circumstances on anyone, Nanako and Mimiko proved to be great companions. They’d only been in your company for two days, and you already dreaded the thought of separating from them. Their presence made you feel more peaceful than ever before, and they began to take great interest in your drawings.

It was nice to have someone to show your work to, and you encouraged them to pick up drawing as well. You even provided them each with some sheets of paper and a stick of charcoal, which they both made use of. Mimiko especially took to it, her skills being more advanced than her sister’s childlike doodles.

They seemed to be recovering from whatever had taken place the day they were brought to the cell. Until feeding day rolled around and they were graced with Kai’s presence.

They shrunk back as he stormed into the room, taking refuge on the small cot. You guarded them best you could, positioning your body in front of theirs to shield them from view.

“Thank you,” you muttered as he set the tray on the floor, just as you always did.

You found that a little manners went a long way with him.

“Whatever,” he grumbled as you scanned over the food, a frown etching itself on your face.

He’d given you your normal meal of grilled fish, white rice, a salad of some sort, and green tea. However, the additional food was two apples, and the tray contained a singular pair of chopsticks.

“…Did you bring extra chopsticks, by any chance?” you questioned as you set the tray on the bed, handing an apple to each girl.

Instantly, they began to devour the fruit, paying no attention to the look Kai cast you. “For?”

“The girls…they need to eat, too.”

“They’re eating the apples, aren’t they?”

You grimaced at his words, the very mention of the fruit leaving a poor taste in your mouth. “They need more than that, Kai.”

He scanned over you, leering at your exposed body as he so often did, before settling his sights back onto your face. “What’s in it for me?”

The bitter taste in your mouth worsened, and you fought back the shudder that wanted to wrack your body. “What do you want?”

You already knew what he was getting at, but a foolish bit of hope wanted to believe that he may surprise you. Unfortunately, he didn’t.

“I haven’t bathed you yet.”

Bile rose in the back of your throat, but you swallowed it down. You’d been cleaned by him enough times that you should be accustomed to it, but it never failed to sicken you. Even as sheltered as you were, you knew that he wasn’t doing it out of the good of his heart. No, he derived some pleasure from groping your nude body under the guise of cleansing you.

You turned back to the girls, who were already done with their apples and eyeing the tray with hunger. “You two can have that.”

They hesitated for a moment, but once Nanako grasped the tea, Mimiko followed her lead and took the rice. Satisfied that they were being nourished, you turned back to Kai.

“Just get me some rice and tea after you finish.”

“Awfully demanding of you, Izumi,” he said with a scoff, though his eyes held a gleam you didn’t like. “Have you forgotten your place?”

“Kai, please get me some rice and tea after you finish cleaning me,” you whispered, hoping that’d be enough to sway him.

It wasn’t.

“Get on your knees and beg,” he ordered, making your body recoil as your eyes went wide. He snickered at your reaction. “Go ahead. You need food, don’t you?”

The girls must’ve sensed how unwilling you were for him to touch you, as their ravenous chewing began to slow.

“You can have the green stuff,” Nanako offered lowly, drawing Kai’s attention to her.

“And we share the rest,” Mimiko chimed in, eliciting another mocking laugh from Kai.

“Isn’t that sweet?” he cooed, condensation dripping from every word.

You ignored him and nodded at the girls. Maybe it was selfish to take food away from them, but you hated the way Kai touched you.

“I still need to bathe you,” he reminded you as if you could forget that.

Drawing in a breath, you shook your head. “Next time.”

“Again, with the demands, Izumi.”

“I’m sorry, Kai.”

He didn’t reply, instead grasping you by the arm. “I think you need to bathe now. You stink.”

You tried to wiggle out of his hold, but he had an iron grip on you. Knowing you couldn’t afford to waste energy on a useless fight, you relented.

“Just bring us more tea when you’re done.”

You knew he’d deemed the request as demanding, but it was the least he could do.

“Did you beg me?”

“I can’t with how you’re gripping me.”

He rolled his eyes, then shoved you to the floor, the hard ground scraping your exposed knees. You bit the inside of your cheeks as your eyes watered, not wanting to show fear in front of the girls.

So, instead of protesting, you swallowed down your pride and groveled in front of him. “P-please bring us more tea when you’re done.”

Seconds ticked by without him saying a thing, and you glanced up at him. He was smirking down at you, and a flick of his hand indicated for you to raise. You did so, and once you were on your feet again, you tried your best to ignore the satisfaction on Kai’s face.

Chapter Text

You were very familiar with fear. Even before being locked up by the village, it was an emotion you were well acquainted with. A turbulent home life and volatile treatment by your teachers and peers lead to you living in a constant state of anxiety, and once you were imprisoned, every waking moment started to feel like a nightmare.

But as the snow of winter began to melt and nourish the greenery of the spring, your life started to feel a little more bearable again, all due to the company of two little girls. You’d done everything in your power to shield them from the harsh abuse you’d faced, trying to preserve whatever bit of childhood innocence they had left. Your efforts made Nanako and Mimiko grow comfortable around you, and as the cycle of the seasons started anew, a strong bond developed between you three.

You relished the connection you had with them. For the first time in forever, you had the company of people who didn’t see you as a monster. They treated you like another sister. They included you in any game they conjured in their head, and looked to you for protection when Kai or another villager would enter the cell. You accepted your new role wholeheartedly. Even if no blood was shared with them, you’d grown to view them as your family.

But that closeness came with a downside. In the year since Nanako and Mimiko have joined you, you’ve developed another fear.

From time to time, vestiges of your old life would enter your mind, and you’d remember the blood sister you had that perished on that fateful night. She’d only been in the world for a few months, and her death – knowing that you were the cause of it – continued to haunt you.

Your second shadow, though calmer in their presence, was unpredictable. Your circumstances kept it riled up, increasing the chances of an accident occurring. Worse, the actions of the villagers were completely out of your control.

Every hour of the day was a chance for disaster to occur for you three, and you knew it was only a matter of time before one did. And when that time came, you knew there was a very real chance that you may lose your sisters.

That very thought filled you with dread. If it meant keeping Nanako and Mimiko safe, you’d lay down your life for them. You wouldn’t allow another sister to be stolen from you, let alone two.

******

Screaming awakened you. At first, you thought it to be your own, as it wouldn’t have been the first time you awoke screaming from a nightmare. Then, as sleep began to clear from your mind, you realized that wasn’t the case, and your attention shifted to the girls. They too were silent, huddled against the wall with tears in their eyes as pained screams sounded in the distance.

“What’s going on?” you asked as you sat up, the remnants of your slumber making your voice croaky.

Nanako shook her head, her body trembling. “W-we don’t know.”

A crash reached your ears, making all three of you jump and the girls cry harder. Your shadow began to grow active, loitering around the door as the noise drew closer.

Typically, you’d try to yield it back when it got too active, as it posed a threat to the girls and scared them. However, given all the noise going on outside, you thought it best to let it run wild. It was your only true method of defense.

Still, you drew Nanako and Mimiko into your arms, ready to shield them with your body if need be. You were already closest to the door, so you’d be the first one that a potential threat would see.

“It’s okay,” you soothed, brushing your hands over their hair as they continued to cry. “We’re going to be okay.”

It was a promise you shouldn’t make, as you had little control over your situation. Yet, it was all you could think to say to calm them.

“How do you know?” Mimiko cried, burying her face into your shift.

“Because I won’t let anything happen to you two.”

The screaming began to cease, and a sigh of relief left you. Seconds ticked by, and gradually, the girls began to quiet down, though you didn’t release either of them. Their closeness brought you comfort, and as they sagged against you, you suspected they felt the same way.

However, that relief was zapped away as the door flew open, revealing a tall man covered in blood.

You, Nanako, and Mimiko all screamed, terror coursing through you at the sight of the stranger. He wore dark dress pants that clung to his figures and a white button-up that’d been stained red. His inky black hair was piled on top of his head, showing off his large earrings. Even with the minimal light, you could tell he was in good shape, and that a fight between the two of you would end with him as the victor.

The girls began to cry anew. Alarm bells sounded in your head at the gore that clung to his clothing. His eyes, foxlike in nature, were full of rage. You shuddered as he set his sights on you, too terrified to notice the sympathy that entered his gaze.

“I’m-”

You don’t let him finish his sentence, instead willing your shadow to attack. It was a trick you tried once before, with devasting effects. The consequences of it were immense, but your goal was achieved. Instantly, a flash of blue zoomed at him, one that he narrowly dodged with expert ease. You knew that once activated, your shadow would run wild until you calmed down, so you turned your attention to finding a way out for the girls.

Your gaze shifted upward, homing in on the windows lining the wall. They were too small for you, but perhaps Nanako and Mimiko could squeeze through them. It was something you’d thought about before, but always deemed it too risky to try. If they were caught, they wouldn’t come out unscathed. Now, though, a strange man covered in blood was easily evading your shadow, which had caused massive destruction before. Put short, he was a threat, and you didn’t want to find out what he had in store for you three.

“Sweeties,” you murmured, making sure to keep your voice low. Not that it mattered, since breaking the window would catch his attention, anyway. “Do you trust me?” After a moment of hesitation, both girls nodded, making you smile. “Okay, we need to get the windows open.”

Your plan was incredibly flawed and hinged on your shadow keeping him busy, but it was better than nothing.

“And then what?” Nanako questioned, taking a cue from you, and keeping her voice low.

“Then you two go out of it.”

“And you?” Mimiko chimed in as you began to think of ways to discreetly break the window.

They were impossible to open without shattering the glass, so the noise would quickly give you all away. But what other choice did you have?

Getting yanked out of the bed, it seemed, because that’s exactly what happened.

The girls screeched as you flew into the arms of the stranger, your shadow having retreated into the darkness of the room. Your heart sunk to your stomach, your anxiety worsening as you glanced at the room. New holes indented the walls, and scorch marks were evident in some places. It was a miracle that the place didn’t catch on fire, and the fact that he wasn’t harmed signaled the man’s strength.

You thrashed in his grip, and his arms wrapped you, gluing yours to your side and leaving you unable to claw at him. Shrieks left you as his hold refused to budge, tears springing to your eyes. You were at his mercy, with no way to defend yourself or the girls.

A hand clamped over your mouth, silencing you. You thought about biting, but you knew better. It would only further invoke his wrath. The best thing you could do right now is to take whatever he dished out.

“Don’t hurt us,” Nanako whimpered, the fear in her voice making you cry harder.

“I’m not going to hurt you, but I need you to calm down,” the man said, his voice strong and calm despite the mayhem around him. “Can you do that for me?” The girls mumbled out yeses, and seeing as you had no way to talk, you nodded. “Okay, I’m going to remove my hand now. Don’t scream.”

Another nod, then a breath of relief when his hand left your mouth. You stumbled back to the cot, wanting to put distance between the two of you. Instantly, the girls attached themselves to you.

“Who are you? Why are you here? Wh-”

Your flurry of questions was silenced by him holding up a hand. “I’m Geto Suguru. Izumi, I’m assuming?”

“Ho-”

“The elders,” he said before you could finish. “They told me about all three of you, and said you’re the oldest.”

You shrunk back, your heart beating harder. Any friend of the village was a foe to you.

He noticed your reaction, and ran a hand over his hair, disheveling his already messy bun. “You don’t have to worry about them anymore. You’re safe now.”

You blinked, then scoffed, unable to believe that a man drenched in blood…

Wait.

“Where’d the blood come from?” you whispered, the pieces falling into place.

If the villagers were dead, they could no longer terrorize you three.

You’d long ago given up hopes of being rescued, even before you abandoned any plans to escape. But knowing that your tormentors were gone meant that you could go free, and leave the hellhole you’d been trapped in for a decade.

“I think you know where,” he said, the corners of his lips turning upward.

You shivered at his expression, the malice he felt toward them evident on his face.

“How?” you found yourself asking, though you knew it was dumb.

If he could evade your shadow, taking care of the villagers, the majority of whom were passed the prime of their lives, would be an easy feat.

“I’ll explain everything another time,” he promised, holding a hand out to you. “But we need to leave now.”

You eyed it warily as if the appendage had the ability to bite. Though he was saving you now, that didn’t guarantee that he didn’t have ill intentions. At one time, the village had been your refuge, before its residents turned on you. You didn’t want a repeat of the past, and now you had the girls to worry about.

“I promised not to hurt you,” Geto reminded, sensing your hesitancy.

“Promises are broken all the time,” you sniffed.

He said you three were safe now, but you didn’t know if that depended on you going with him. If you denied his request, he very well may turn on you. Alternatively, if you went with him, you didn’t know what he had in store. A man willing to slaughter so many people, innocent or not, was a man to be cautious of.

“You’re free to walk out of this door without me, you know,” he said gently, making your brows furrow. “I won’t stop you, but I wouldn’t advise you to do so.”

“Why?”

“Where do you have to go?”

Valid point. You had no money, you were barely dressed and filthy, and you’d be wandering in a remote village with nowhere to go. Plus, you had Mimiko and Nanako to think of.

“We couldn’t stay here?”

He cocked a brow, before shaking his head. “No.”

“Why not?”

“I’ll tell you if you come with me,” he said, wiggling his fingers.

“Why do you want us to come with you so badly?” Mimiko asked, taking the words right out of your mouth.

He aimed a gentle smile at you three. “I can’t resist helping damsels in distress.”

His playful words were woefully out of place, but you couldn’t stop the blush that consumed your face.

“Girls?” you murmured, deciding this was a decision they should be a part of. They were young, but you knew all too well the damage that could come from having your voice taken from you at an early age. “What do you think?”

“He’s scary,” Nanako whispered.

“But nice,” Mimiko added, too which her sister hesitantly nodded to.

Not the most helpful assessment, but you couldn’t disagree with either of them.

“Promise that we can leave at any time,” you said after some contemplation, not seeing any other option.

“I thought promises didn’t mean anything?”

You frowned. “They’re better than just wordlessly following a bloodied stranger into the dark.”

He chuckled. “Very well. I promise that you three may leave at any time.”

Unlike you three, he was completely at ease. An advantage of being able to guarantee your safety, you suppose.

You held a pinkie out. “Pinkie promise?”

His mouth fell open, and it was easy to tell that your word took him aback. “A pinkie promise?”

Your cheeks heated, but you nodded. “If you break it, your pinkie gets cut off.”

The girls gasped in horror at the explanation. It was a callback from your childhood, one you never had a reason to explain to them. In reality, you had no way of acquiring his finger if he did, but the insurance was nice.

He hooked his pinkie with yours, a proper smile on his face. Even with blood staining his pale skin, you couldn’t deny his handsomeness.

“If I break that promise, I’ll cut my pinkie off myself. I swear it.”

You nodded and stood from the bed, before taking the girl’s hands in yours. “I’m counting on that.”

He said nothing else, though his smile never faltered, even as he turned his back and began to work out the door. Taking in a breath, you followed him, silently praying that you made the right choice.

Chapter Text

Death was a natural part of life, and as a Jujutsu Sorcerer, it was something Suguru faced daily. Yet, he was still struggling to deal with the mission that had gone so terribly, resulting in the death of a 14-year-old girl. Riko hadn’t gotten the chance to experience the world, and because of his and Satoru’s carelessness, she never would. Over a year later, the cheers of the cultist as her body was carried out still rang through his head and birthed feelings he’d never felt before.

They were defenseless parasites and had the nerve to celebrate the death of a superior being.

Suguru lit a cigarette as an older man escorted him to the sight of his latest mission, not really paying attention to his droning. None of his words were centered around his mission, and he was too lost in his own head to pretend to listen.

His conversation with Yuki Tsukumo, a fellow special grade with a disdain for Jujutsu High, reinforced those feelings and led him to explore some of his more violently radical thoughts.

Her confirmation that humans without powers – monkeys, essentially – being destroyed would be the easiest route had stuck with him. He fought against the urges to initiate their annihilation, but it made so much sense to him. Why should innocent sorcerers suffer because of the weak, forcing them to risk their lives due to the flawed world they created?

“Here we are,” the man announced as they reached the top of a wooden pathway. At the end of the trail lay an archway, serving as an entry to the village. “Kuroki,” he said with no small amount of pride in his voice.

“So, why am I here?” Suguru asked as he led him to a woman in the center, seemingly waiting for his arrival.

It was the first mission he’d taken in a while, and at the advice of Yaga Sensi, he’d put some effort into his appearance. Yet, he hadn’t paid much attention to the details. He just needed to clear his head, and a mission in the countryside seemed like the perfect opportunity to do so.

“Our village has been struggling with something for a long, long time, and we’re ready to rid ourselves of it,” the woman said, a deep-set frown on her face. “My best friend was lost because of it…”

The man, whose name Suguru couldn’t be bothered to learn, held a hand up. “And we still mourn her, however…”

“Get to the point,” Suguru barked, not in the mood to hear strangers whining.

“Why don’t we just show you?” the man offered.

The woman’s glower remained, but she didn’t protest the idea.

Suguru silently agreed and trailed behind them, contemplating the potential reasons for the woman’s distress. He suspected that it might be a curse, possibly of significant magnitude if it had been present for an extended period. The recent escalation in its power might have prompted the villagers to seek aid.

The sun had already set, yet there were still plenty of people milling about. Some stood in front of their houses, watching as Suguru was led to the curse plaguing them. It nearly made him scoff, seeing the weak crowd around him to deal with something they couldn’t. Still, anticipation rose in his veins. He was in the mood for a fight, and his expectations had been raised.

He was led to a small building on the edge of the village. It barely had windows, and the only door was highly secured. That made Suguru raise a brow. If it was a curse they were trying to contain, their efforts would be rendered futile. Though not visible to everyone, they were destructive by nature.

The man handed him a key, which Suguru accepted. He was growing warier by the minute and beginning to doubt that a simple curse lay waiting for him.

“What behind this door?” Suguru questioned, trying to get an idea of what he was going to face. The man hesitated, making the Jujutsu student narrow his eyes at him. “Tell me.”

“Abominations,” the woman sneered, her answer not clarifying a thing.

“It’d be easier for us to explain if you saw it firsthand,” the man urged.

With one last glare, Suguru huffed out a breath and unlocked the door, slowly pushing it open. What he saw made his breath stop. Instead of a horrendous curse, three girls lay caged up, huddled together on a single cot as they slept. The eldest of the trio looked to be about his age, her body serving as a pillow for a little blonde girl. Resting, they looked peaceful. But if the cage wasn’t a blatant giveaway, their tattered clothing and dirtied appearance were a clear sign that they weren’t well treated.

Rage soon replaced his shock, and he stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut as he exited. He didn’t care if he was quiet or not, because he didn’t intend to leave you all locked up for long.

“Will you deal with them?” the woman asked as soon as he exited, her survival instincts not kicking in at his murderous expression.

At that moment, he was disgusted that they were even a part of the same species.

“What’re their names?” Suguru murmured, his voice low and calm, a contrast to how he was feeling.

Scenarios raced through his head, all of them involving violent deaths for the animals before him. They were the ones who should be locked in a cage to starve, not some innocent girls.

The stupid bitch had the nerve to look offended. “What does it matter?”

“Tell me,” he growled with a scowl, quickly losing patience.

“Izumi’s the eldest,” the man spoke up, tensing up as Suguru snapped his head toward him. “Mimiko is the brunette. Nanako is the blonde.”

Suguru nodded his head and flicked his cigarette to the ground. The woman smirked, seeming to believe that was enough to appease him. It did no such thing. He had a suspicion that the girls were once members of the village, and it sickened him to know they would so easily turn on their own.

He opened his mouth, questions whirling through his head, then closed it. He wasn’t in the mood to hear explanations rooted in ignorance. No, he’d get his answers when he got the girls.

“Well? You got what you want, are you going to handle them now?” the woman demanded, unable to pick up on his violent mood.

It was going to be the death of her.

The man at least had enough sense to look nervous. His uneasy look morphed into terror as Suguru stormed toward him, delivering a punch to his jaw as soon as he was within reach. The bitch screamed as the old prick hit the ground, turning to run as Suguru set his sights on her. He pulled her back by her hair, giving her the same treatment that he’d given the man.

At this point, the villagers that had been watching his arrival were gaping at him, horror on their faces. Their fear only pissed him off further. They were fine ‘dealing with’ three young girls locked in a cage, but attacking the people sanctioning their deaths was a step too far.

He felt his lips spreading into a smirk, one fueled by his current anger, and a flurry of pent-up emotions. Keeping his eyes on the crowd, he raised a boot and placed it on the fallen woman’s throat, applying pressure until a heard a crunch. Cries and gasps sounded as they began to scurry away, which only broadened his grin. He had no intention of letting them go.

His teachings dictated that he let the villagers live after he freed the girls, but Suguru refused to let them off so easily. As red began to cloud his vision, he decided that he’d show them what true fear was.

******

By the time he came out of his frenzy, Suguru was covered in blood, with dead bodies all around him. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, nor did he know how many he killed. But despite the brutal scene in front of him, he felt more peace than he had in a long time. There wasn’t a tinge of remorse to be found, as he’d essentially slaughtered a bunch of violent animals.

Ultimately, it was an act that’d have positive consequences. They were lowlifes that abused innocents, weaklings whose very existence depends on that of the strong. They were nothing but leeches. Calling them humans was too kind, as they were on par with monkeys. Lower, perhaps, because monkeys’ way of life didn’t negatively impact the world around them.

He strolled to the door where the girls had lay sleeping, pushing it open. As he stepped through the threshold, he was greeted by screams. They were understandably terrified, probably thinking he was one of those animals coming to brutalize them.

His brows raised as he felt the cursed energy present skyrocket, homing in on the source. There you sat, shielding the younger girls with your body. Your face, though dirty, was pretty, and your short white nightgown left little to the imagination.

At that moment, he knew he’d made the right choice.

******

It pained Suguru to admit it, but he’d have to deal with his parents soon. They, too, were powerless animals, and that robbed them of the right to live. Should they remain breathing, they’d only tie him down.

But that was a problem for another day. For now, he had to worry about getting the girls somewhere safe.

You continued to shield the younger girls as they treaded through the bodies, while you looked at them intently. You’d frown whenever you saw the corpse of a young villager but showed no other reaction.

You’d piqued his interest. Despite being so sheltered and mistreated, you had obvious intelligence. More interesting, though, was the immense amount of power you wielded, formidable enough to keep him on his toes for a little while. He could tell you didn’t have a good grasp on your technique, but you knew enough to attack him.

Suguru felt lucky to have been selected for this mission. Had it been someone else, the villagers would’ve been left unscathed. Had it been someone else, the pretty little thing he’d unearthed would’ve become nothing but a pawn for the higher-ups.

“Where are we going?” you spoke as you all trekked down the hill that led away from the village.

“A motel,” he answered. Unfortunately, his house wasn’t an option. His parents were still there, and the moment the bodies of the villagers were found, it’d be the first place they’d search for him. “Just for the night.”

“And then?”

Another motel, most likely, one in a more populated region so they wouldn’t stick out. Nagoya, most likely, as it’s the nearest big city to Kuroki. There, he could recuperate and develop a proper game plan.

Suguru shrugged. “We’ll see.”

“You told me that you’d give us answers if we came with you,” you said, audibly upset. “We came with you, so give us answers.”

His steps faltered, his mind trying to conjure words that wouldn’t scare you off.

“We’re trusting you, even though you’re covered in blood and leading us to an unknown location,” you pointed out with a sniff, as seconds ticked by without him answering.

He couldn’t help but chuckle at your indignation, then nodded. “Correct. To answer your question, I have to come up with something before I could solidly answer what’s next.”

“Are we going to be in trouble?” Nanako quietly asked.

“No. Even if we’re caught, I’ll take the fall.”

The Jujutsu world was unforgiving, but he’d doubt that his former allies would be cruel enough to persecute three girls just freed from captivity. Even if you obeyed his every word, he’d suspected you’d be safe. He was your savior, after all, so it was only logical that you three would listen to him.

“How?” you whispered, causing him to look over his shoulder at you. A frown was etched into your face, your eyes wide and watery. “How’d you do it?”

“I was trained to deal with curses,” he said as he looked forward, smirking as their screams replayed in his head. “They were nothing in comparison.”

“Curses?”

How pitiful. You hadn’t a clue of what you could see, all because of some lowly animals.

“The monsters you three see, that no one else can. In the world of Jujutsu, we call them curses.”

You sucked in a breath, releasing it moments later. “And I’m guessing you’ll explain about Jujutsu later?”

Suguru could only imagine how you were feeling at that moment, and it made his hurt heart. It must be shocking to hear that there’s an entire society of people like you after being abused for your nature for years.

He nodded as a dingy motel came into view. “It’ll take a while, so yes.”

“Why’d you do it?” a small voice asked, sounding nearly identical to Nanako’s.

“Because people like them don’t deserve to live,” Suguru replied, some of his anger trickling back into his system as he thought about what those ‘people’ must’ve put you three through. “They were abusive scum with no purpose, so I had to take care of them.”

There were no further questions, and you all approached the motel in silence, the sounds of the night the only noise to be heard.

That’s okay. Suguru knew you all needed time to process what happened.

Being in the middle of nowhere, the closest town to the motel was Kuroki, and most of their residents had caught a case of death. It’d do for the night, and he hoped it was seedy enough to turn a blind eye to your appearances. A man covered in blood and three girls coated in dirt – with barely anything on – was certainly a suspicious sight.

And should the motel have better morals than meets the eye, Suguru wouldn’t mind getting his hands a little dirtier.

Chapter Text

“Will you all be okay out here?” Geto questioned, stopping in front of the motel’s office.

You furrowed your brows. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

Truth be told, you were on edge. Apart from the young, you felt no sadness over the lives lost in Kuroki. However, the massacre was a gory scene that’d be sure to give you nightmares, and you were now escaping with a mass murderer. Nice as he may seem, he was still a killer. Even if he didn’t harm you or the girls, you knew it was only a matter of time before he became a very wanted man.

He smiled and held his hands up. “Just checking. I won’t be too long.”

With that, he entered the office, leaving you and the twins alone in the dark parking lot surrounded by forest. You stared at the trees, contemplating if you and the girls should make a run for it. You had nowhere to go, but you were still unsure if you should put your faith in Geto.

You glanced down at Nanako and Mimiko. They were huddled close to you, dried tears staining their cheeks, their eyes red and droopy. Their state made your heart sink. You tried your best to block their view of the carnage, but you didn’t know if your efforts had been successful. They looked wary and bone tired, and that’s what ultimately persuaded you not to flee. They needed to sleep, and you’d be no safer in the woods than you would with Geto.

Moments later, Geto returned from the office, two keys in hand. He gestured for you to follow him, and you did so without issue, treading behind him as you held hands with both girls.

“You and the girls can have the beds,” Geto stated as he opened the door, revealing a dated motel room with two full-sized mattresses.

“And what about you?” you inquired as you ushered the Nanako and Mimiko into the room.

They immediately headed for the bed furthest from the door, and though you all were coated in grime, you didn’t stop them. The place didn’t appear to be the cleanest, so you doubt it’d make a difference.

“I have another errand to make,” he revealed. He tossed you a key, which you managed to catch. “I’ll be back in the morning.”

You tightly clutched the key, the rusty object easing some of your trepidation. It wouldn’t aid you in fighting him off, but it was insurance that you could come and go as you pleased.

“And what’s that?”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said ominously. “Just keep the door locked.”

Before you could ask any more questions, he left, leaving you bewildered. After spending seconds staring at the door, you peeked at the girls, who were already sound asleep. Sighing, you decided that it wasn’t your business.

Besides, it couldn’t be worse than slaughtering an entire village.

You crawled into your designated bed and shut your eyes, finding the dusty sheets to be quite comfortable. Compared to the cot you’d been forced to sleep in for a decade, the motel mattress felt like heaven.

******

When you awoke the next morning, Geto still wasn’t back from his errand. The girls were wide awake, though, and murmuring amongst themselves. The sunlight streaming through the window made their dirty state even more apparent, and with easy access to a bathroom, you decided baths were far past due.

“I’m going to go run a bath for you two,” you said as you sat up.

Nanako and Mimiko brightened up at your announcement, making you smile. Kai’s perversions were the only reason you’d been cleaned ‘regularly,’ whereas the twins were only washed when necessary.

You yawned as you headed to the motel’s only bathroom, pausing for a moment as you took in the cracking, yellowed bathtub that had a ring of mildew around it. You cringed and decided that a shower may be best. However, you couldn’t get the water to come out of the rusted showerhead, forcing you to start a bath.

Beggars couldn’t be choosers, you supposed.

You used the motel’s complimentary bath soap and found two decently clean washcloths. You set one aside for yourself and kept the other for them. Once you deemed the water high enough, you called the girls in, who hurried in.

“Careful,” you chided, pointing to some water on the floor. “You might slip.”

“Sorry,” they murmured in unison, beginning to tug at their dirtied gowns.

Assuming he planned on coming back, you preyed that clothing was on Geto’s errand list. He could’ve just dumped you and the girls at the motel and gone on his merry way.

You turned your back as they undressed, facing the wall until they gave you the okay.

“Are you two going to be okay on your own, or-”

“Can you do it?” Nanako interrupted, answering your question before it was finished.

You nodded and faced them, the water submerging most of their bodies. Clutching the washcloth, you kneeled on the tile.

“Close your eyes,” you ordered as you dipped the rag into the lukewarm water. The bathroom had no shampoo and conditioner, so you’d have to settle for wringing the wet cloth out over their heads. You did so twice for each of them, swiping at the dirt that stuck to their skin afterward. “You two can open them now.”

They did so as you lathered the washcloth up with soap. Once it was sufficiently sudsy, you got to work.

“Where’s the man?” Mimiko asked as you scrubbed her sister’s face.

“Don’t know. He just said you had an errand.”

“Are we…safe now?” Nanako muttered.

You froze, then shrugged. “We’re safer than we were at the village.”

Which wasn’t saying much, but still. At the very least, you had your freedom.

“Can we trust him?” Nanako spoke again, shaking her head and flicking water everywhere.

You flinched as a drop of liquid got into your eye, but you were too preoccupied to swipe it away. “Right now, we’re with him because we have to be, not because he’s trustworthy,” you said with more harshness than intended, making them both stare at you with wide eyes. You took in a breath, being more mindful of your tone when you spoke again. “You can never trust anyone you just met.”

The girls didn’t respond. As extreme as it may seem to them, your words were based on experience. Trust was something that had to be earned, and even someone that seemed helpful could and would backstab you.

The rest of their bath was spent in silence. When you were done, you wrapped them both in a towel and drained the water, before running a bath for yourself. You eyed the discarded gowns with distaste, hating that the twins would have to go back in their dirty garments.

So caught up in your thoughts, you didn’t even hear the motel door opening.

“I’m back,” a voice announced as footsteps neared the bathroom.

The door began to open, a squeak leaving you at the prospect of Geto seeing the girls undressed. You quickly stood up and whirled around, intending to use your larger body to hide theirs. Which would’ve worked just fine, if you hadn’t slipped on the puddle that formed on the floor.

The girls yelled as you hit the floor, a gasp leaving you. Fortunately, you hadn’t hit your head, but pain now radiated throughout your dominant arm and knee.

“Are you okay?” Geto asked in concern, rushing to your side, and helping you up.

Wherever he’d gone, he was able to clean himself up and change out of his bloodied clothes.

He grabbed your injured arm and helped you into a sitting position, the pressure he applied making you wince. “Fine.”

You knew it wasn’t broken, but it had taken a good amount of damage, all because you were too stupid to heed your own advice. Didn’t you tell the girls not to move too quickly, for fear of what happened to you happening to them?

“Uh-huh,” he said, eyeing you with doubt. He turned to the girls, pointing to the pile of black fabric he dropped. “Those are some old T-shirts of mine. They should fit like a dress on you two.”

Mimiko silently retrieved them, while Nanako continued to stare at you. “Izumi…”

“I’m fine,” you promised. “Go get dressed.”

With one last glance, she nodded and followed Mimiko into the bedroom, leaving you alone with Geto.

“Are you truly okay?” he asked as he turned off your water, which was dangerously close to overflowing.

“Peachy,” you murmured, cringing as you took a step on your leg. “I need to bathe now…”

Your heart pounded against your chest, and you hoped he got the hint.

He stared at you. “Raise your arm, then I’ll leave.”

“I’m fine,” you repeated, dread coiling in your belly as he stayed rooted in place.

Sheltered as you were, you knew better than to expose yourself to a man. No matter how innocent the intention behind the action was, they’d take it as an invitation.

“I promise, I’ll leave if you’re okay.”

“And if you think I’m not?”

He opened his mouth, then shut it, then brought a hand to the back of his neck. “I’d offer my assistance,” he muttered, his cheeks taking on a pink hue.

“No,” you snapped, folding your arms over your chest. "Absolutely not." 

His eyes widened. “I mean nothing but it, I swear. I just want to help you.”

“Why would I believe you?”

“Just…” he lowered his arm as he trailed off, heaving out a sigh. “You are kind of my responsibility right now, and I need to make sure you’re okay. That includes verifying you can care for yourself.”

His explanation and sheepish expression made some of the tension leave your body, but you weren’t about to give up so easily.

“I can care for myself, look,” you said, raising the arm you fell on. Instantly, pain shot through it, and you bit the inside of your teeth to keep quiet. “See?”

You spoke through gritted teeth, giving yourself away.

“Izumi, I promise I won’t look until you’re in the tub.”

“Bu-”

“I won’t take long,” he promised, cutting off your round of protests.

Realizing he wasn’t going to budge, you decided to give in, even if your head was screaming at you not to. You weren’t comfortable in the slightest, but he refused to leave the bathroom. And seeing as he was bigger and stronger than you, you were helpless to make him go.

With trembling hands, you tugged at the hem of the dress, a whimper slipping out as you moved your arm.

He sighed. “Let me.”

This time, you put up no resistance. Internally, however, memories began to assault you. Tears sprung to your eyes as he helped you remove the withered gown you’d been stuck in for too long. The feel of phantom hands roaming over your body made you want to gag. The last guy to see you nude was Kai, and he had less than pure intentions. If Geto was the same way, there was nothing you could to do stop him.

“Hey, hey, breath,” he urged as you began to hyperventilate. He threw your old shift to the ground, then grabbed your shoulders, looking you in the eyes. “It’s all right.”

You shook your head and opened your mouth, but words struggled to come out. You didn’t trust him – you didn’t even really know him – and now you were bearing your body to him. You were scared that he’d get the wrong idea. You wanted to run and hide, but you had nowhere to go.

The walls began to close in on you, robbing you of much-needed air. The lights seemed to dim, and you wondered if you were about to pass out.

“You’re having a panic attack, Izumi. Breathe with me,” he demanded, simultaneously sounding far away and too close.

He took a deep breath, released it, then repeated. He did it two more times before you began to copy him. As you did, the room returned to its original size, and the lights grew brighter. Slowly but surely, your heart rate began to slow, and your breathing began to regulate. Once you were back to normal, he offered you a small smile.

He swiped at your damp cheeks. “Better?”

Shame washed over you at your reaction, but he regarded you with zero judgment.

You nodded. “Yeah.”

“Are you okay with letting me help now?”

You hesitated, then nodded again. Your arm was still killing you, and you were beginning to omit a foul odor. “Yeah.”

He grinned. Gently gripping your bicep, he guides you into the water, averting his gaze until you’re seated in the water. A quick position adjustment saw your intimate parts fully submerged, though some water spilled over the side.

“Be careful when you get out,” Geto hummed as he retrieved the washcloth that you’d set aside for yourself. “Don’t want you slipping again.”

Your cheeks flamed. Your little accident resulted in you being in such a vulnerable position. In the future, you’d need to be more alert to your surroundings, and less prone to panic. As it stood, you’d set yourself up for disaster too many times.

Just as you’d done with the girls, he wrung the cloth over your head a few times, the warm water removing the surface layer of dirt dwelling on your hair. Your locks still needed proper cleansing, though, your itchy scalp was a testament to that.

“I brought some shampoo and conditioner,” Geto revealed as if he read your mind. “We can’t stay here much longer, but you can wash your hair soon.”

The prospect of performing such a mundane action made you excited. As a child, your mother set aside Saturdays as hair days. But once you were taken by the village, even combs were denied to you.

For the first time, you found yourself returning his smile. “I’d like that.”

Gradually, you began to relax. He was gentle and made sure to avoid your most private areas. And though the bathroom wasn’t that clean, the heat of the water felt excellent. It’d been years since you’d taken a bath, having been subjected to wipe-downs that involved a lot of groping during your captivity.

“Where’d you go?” you murmured as he scrubbed down your back.

“To my house. I had to get some things.”

You perked up. “Is that where you’re taking us?”

“No…I got into an argument with my parents, and I can’t go back now.”

Something told you there was more to the story, but you decided not to press it.

He handed the washcloth to you. You looked at him curiously, your face growing hotter when you noticed his white t-shirt clinging to his body. You’d seen nude men before, and none of them were as sculpted as he.

“For the places that I couldn’t get,” he explained at your puzzled look, gesturing to the crotch area of his pants. “Y’know…”

You appreciated his respect for your boundaries, but his clarification did nothing to help your embarrassment.

“O-okay,” you stammered as you accepted the damp rag. “Can you turn around while quick?”

He did so without comment, and you quickly swiped at the areas he didn’t get. With that, you were done.

“I need a towel,” you said, remaining in the water until he retrieved one.

Still looking away, he held it out to you. You quickly wrapped it around your body and drained the water, relishing the feeling of being clean.

“I have clothes for you too,” Geto said as he opened the bathroom door. “I’ll go get them for you.”

You nodded and used your time alone to dry yourself off. The water had soothed the aching joints in your arm, but moving it was still a challenge, one that made you breathe a sigh of relief when you were done.

Moments later, he came back carrying folded clothes. When he handed them to you, you discovered that it was a black T-shirt and a pair of shorts. Fortunately, the pants were made of a stretchy material and had a drawstring, allowing for comfort and adjustments.

“Thank you,” you said as you pulled the shorts on, managing to keep your towel wrapped as you tied them.

He waved you off. “They’re just some old clothes of mine.”

“Still better than what I had before,” you pointed out as you took the T-shirt. You contemplated swallowing your pride and asking for assistance but decided against it. You’d had worse injuries in the past, you could deal with a little arm pain. “And, uh, thanks for helping…bathe me. It was weird but helpful.”

He chuckled. “Glad to be of service.”

The T-shirt was nice and oversized, stopping right about your hips and concealing your figure. You savored the ease of motion Geto’s clothes provided, too busy delighting in the mobility offered to notice the way his foxlike eyes trailed over you, growing darker the longer he took you in.

Chapter Text

Suguru didn’t believe in love at first sight. No matter how strong your feelings may seem, it was impossible to fall in love with a stranger. He did, however, believe that lust had no time frame. You could see a stranger walking down the street and feel lust toward them, without a word ever being spoken. Because, unlike love, lust was based purely on physical attraction. And he knew for a fact that he was lusting after you.

Hard.

After just 24 hours in your presence, he was undeniably intrigued by you. You were a strong, pretty little thing, that was simultaneously meek and assertive. And your body…

The feel of your soft skin hadn’t left his mind since he bathed you, nor had the glimpses of your nude figure. He’d made good on his promise not to peek, but the water could only conceal so much.

The sight of you in his T-shirt and shorts had driven Suguru wild and made the long walk to Nagoya tortuous. The city had millions of people, allowing you all to blend in with the crowd, and was far enough away from the Jujutsu strongholds of Kyoto and Tokyo. He’d kept a straight face, but knowing you were wearing his clothes, which still had his lingering scent made a sense of possessiveness invade him. He barely knew you, but that hadn’t stopped him from being satisfied, or admiring how well you wore his garments.

By the time you all stumbled upon a motel on the edge of Nagoya, he was painfully hard. If it wasn’t for his oversized shirt, the tent his dick had created in his sweatpants surely would’ve been visible.

Being the gentleman he was, he allowed you and the girls to freshen up first. But when you came out of the shower in nothing but a towel, he’d nearly come undone on the spot. At record speed, he hurried to the bathroom, barely remembering to grab himself a towel.

Freezing water cascaded from the showerhead and onto his body, but it did nothing to halt his arousal. Even as he began to shiver, his hard-on remained, giving him no choice but to take care of the problem.

Suguru bit his lip to stifle the moan that wanted to escape as he stroked his cock. One hand was resting against the tiled wall of the shower, while the other was tugging at himself. His hair was down and plastered to his skin, obscuring the edges of his vision.

His eyes were slammed shut, and his breathing grew hollow as he imagined your hands instead of his. It might’ve been the result of his recent dry spell, but he was already dreaming of all the positions he’d put you in. He was sure you were untouched, and the thought of teaching you – corrupting you – only made him harder.

His hand quickened as he pictured you laying beneath him, your hair sprawled onto the pillow, your knees touching your shoulders as he pounded into you. He knew that your fucked-out expression would be delectable, and the sounds you’d make would make his thrusts more frenzied.

A groan left him at the thought of filling you up and watching his cum drip out of you, marking you from the inside. You’d feel so good, he wagered, that pulling out would be an impossible task.

He began to jerk his cock faster, his other hand wandering to his heavy, cum-filled balls as his core began to tremble. His breath grew shakier, and soon, his hand and the shower wall were covered in his seed.

With a sigh, he removed the showerhead and let the water clean up the evidence of his carnal desire. Even when he began to scrub his body, the erotic image he’d conjured of you stuck in his head. He couldn’t wait to find out how accurate it was.

******

The following day, you felt more rested than you had in ages. The motel you all stayed at was far better than the first. If you thought the first mattress felt like heaven, this one felt like complete nirvana, soft and clean with perfectly fluffed pillows. That, and the fact that you all were far away from Kuroki, lead to the soundest sleep you’d had in ages.

You were no longer so edge, and though it had only been a day, your fear of getting caught was already subsiding. Even if the village causalities were discovered, you all were a good distance from the carnage, and in a big city. And if Geto stayed true to his words, he’d protect you and the girls if he was incriminated. Seeing as he’d been truthful thus far, you were inclined to believe him.

“Bathroom’s all yours,” you announced as you and the girls strolled out, dressed in another pair of Geto’s clothes.

“I’m already dressed,” he said as he stood from the mattress. Walking to the duffle bag that rested on the sofa bed, he pulled out a big wad of cash. Your eyes bulged at the sight of the money. “Put your shoes on, we’re going shopping today.”

“Uh, for what?”

As far as you knew, Geto had everything you needed.

“Clothes for you all,” he explained, before cocking a brow. “Unless you’d prefer to stay in mine?”

Your face heated up, and you shook your head. “N-no, we would not.”

“So, shoes,” he reiterated as he tugged on his own.

Nanako and Mimiko looked up at you, and with a nod of your head, they obediently went to the pile of discarded shoes. Along with clothes, he’d brought three pairs of shoes for you and the girls, women’s tennis shoes, and two old pairs of children’s sneakers. They were all ill-fitting, but they got the job done.

“Here you go, Izumi,” Nanako said as she threw you the tennis.

They landed right at your feet. “Thank you, sweetie.”

The moment all footwear was equipped, Geto was ushering you three out the door. Once he locked the room up, he took the lead. The girls grabbed your hands as you began to follow.

“So, where are we going?”

Though the motel wasn’t located in the city center, several shops and restaurants were within walking distance, giving you all a variety of choices.

“We’re catching a bus to Oyo,” Geto revealed as he led everyone to a bus stop. “The next one should be here in ten or so minutes.”

“Oyo?”

“A shopping district.”

“O-okay,” you murmured, watching with intense fascination as cars sped by, and people milled about.

In less than 48 hours, you’d gone from being imprisoned within a tiny, old-fashioned community, to staying in a bustling modern city. Kuroki, being so tiny, did not need vehicles, and the residents often wore traditional clothing. Life in the rural village was a far cry from Nagoya, with streets teeming with people decked out in the latest trends, and buildings that reached into the sky. Even before Kuroki, the town you were from couldn’t compare to Nagoya. The contrast between them was overwhelming. You couldn’t imagine how packed the city center must be.

“Are you okay?” Geto asked, placing a hand on your shoulder.

You tensed at the contact, then nodded. “Y-yeah. It’s just so…busy.”

He chuckled. “It’s small compared to Tokyo.”

A shudder ran through you at the thought of being in a city bigger than Nagoya.

“I don’t think I could handle that.”

“Lucky for you, we won’t be going there for a while.”

Your eyebrows raised, and you intended to question when exactly he planned to take you all to Japan’s largest city. However, the bus rolled up before you could.

******

“That’s over the item limit, ma’am,” the sales attendant sniffed.

You froze at her words. “Uhm, what’s the limit?”

As you helped the girls pick out their outfits, Geto had been scurrying around the discount shop for you, picking out more clothes than reasonable.

She scoffed and pointed to a large sign located by the dressing rooms, declaring that only ten items were allowed.

“Oh,” you said dumbly, fidgeting under her judgmental gaze.

The disgust was evident as she took in your appearance. You knew you weren’t the prettiest sight to behold. Your clothes were oversized, your shoes ill-fitting, and your hair messy. Your face was bare of makeup, allowing every little flaw you possessed to be visible. It was a far cry from the young woman before you, who had tight clothing that complimented her body, wedges that added inches to her height, and flawless hair and make-up.

While she regarded you with judgment, you looked at her with envy. She didn’t look much older than you and had your life gone normally, you could be like her. A stylish young woman working in a bustling city, one that probably wasn’t robbed of an education or a family.

“Pardon me,” Geto said as he appeared out of nowhere, directing the girl’s attention away from you. The shopping cart was already full of children’s clothes and shoes, as Geto had given you all permission to get as much as you wanted. You noted an extra duffle bag on top of it all. “Is there a problem?”

Relief swamped you at his presence. He was more well-versed with people, and always carried himself with confidence. Surely, he could handle her better than you could.

The woman’s coldness instantly melted away, and she gave him a beaming smile. “No sir, not at all! Bu-”

“She said I was over the limit,” you butted in, frowning at the sickly-sweet tone.

If she could use it with him, why not you, too? Weren’t you also a customer?

“Oh, I can hold them for you,” Geto offered. “Just let me know when you need another outfit.”

“How would I find you?”

He chuckled, and the girl rolled her eyes. “I’ll be waiting outside the dressing room. I want to see everything you try on.”

Your face flamed, the action seeming too intimate to be performed with a stranger that you were on the run with.

“What about the girls?”

He cocked a brow and nodded in their general direction. You peeked over your shoulder and saw them giggling amongst themselves as they took in the shelves of toys. Your heart warmed at the sight.

“Start trying things on. I’ll pay for their stuff and be right there.”

“B-but the limit…” you trailed off.

“They have a rack you could hang the items at,” the woman, whose nametag you could barely read, revealed.

You couldn’t help but glare at her, wishing she’d just said that from the beginning. Bitterness boiled within you at the difference in treatment. Was it so hard for people to treat you like a person?

But, instead of throwing a fit or voicing your grievance, you simply went to the dressing room as the sales attendant escorted Geto to the checkout.

******

Nanako’s and Mimiko’s laughter reached your ears as you tried on yet another outfit. You used his absence to try on pajamas and the intimate items you didn’t currently possess, and that had been tiring enough. Then, Geto found his way to you. Once he was done paying for the girls’ stuff, he demanded to view everything you donned. It was his money buying the stuff, so you suppose he had a right to view it before purchasing. Yet, putting on a mini-fashion show for him was sapping your energy, and pushing you out of your comfort zone.

“That’s too long,” he decided as you modeled a loose maxi dress, one of the few things you’d chosen for yourself. “You’d trip all over yourself.”

“It can be loungewear,” you protested, recalling that your mother had many outfits strictly for the home.

“We won’t be doing much lounging right now, so it’d just take up unnecessary space.”

You huffed out a breath and stomped back into the stall to change, disrobing and throwing the garment into the growing ‘no’ pile. You again reminded yourself that it was due to Geto’s money and kindness that were getting you any clothes. But he was vetoing so much, that it was starting to get frustrating.

You pulled the last outfit from this group, a simple grey V-neck that revealed the tops of your breasts, baggy navy cargo pants with a drawstring, and a comfortable zip-up hoodie. It went nicely with the pairs of sneakers you’d selected, and you prayed that Geto would allow it.

“Is this okay?” you asked as you opened the door, shifting as he scrutinized it.

Finally, he nodded. “It’s fine. Do you have your ears pierced?”

“Yeah.”

Your mother had gotten them done when you were an infant, as was a tradition in her family.

“Great, we’re getting these,” he declared as he held up a small pack of hoop earrings. He then gestured to a bunch of hair accessories, including a black beanie. “And those.”

“Why?”

Surely if a single maxi dress would take up too much space, so would all the accessories he picked out. And what like you had no use for loungewear, you had no use for accessories right now.

“The girls liked how colorful they were,” he explained, before handing you the last of the towering pile of clothes. “I think they deserve something they like, don’t you?”

You sheepishly nodded, guilt now churning in your belly as you headed back into the dressing room. Of course, it made sense that two little girls would pick out the color, girlish things Geto held. Besides, it’d be nice to have things that enhanced your appearance and made you look trendier.

The first thing you tried on was a baby blue tracksuit, paired with a white tank top. The pants and hoodie were oversized, but the tank top showed the contours of your body in detail. The hem stopped right above your belly button. The fabric wasn’t the thickest, and you couldn’t help but blush at the visible outline of your nipples. You decided that zipping up the hoodie would be best.

Unfortunately, Geto disagreed.

“Unzip the hoodie,” he requested, cocking a brow as your squirmed. “What?”

“Uh, it’s tight. The top”

“Most of the tops have been.”

“But this one is really tight…and thin.”

Realization dawned on him, and he let out a laugh. “Izumi, I’ve already bathed you. Surely you could show me a top?”

God, it felt like you were on fire.

Not waiting for an answer, he sauntered over to you and thumbed at the zipper. “May I?”

Imploring the breathing technique he’d shown you, you nodded, desperately willing your heart rate to slow as he unzipped the jacket. Once the tank top was visible, he took a step back in took it in. Time seemed to slow as you awaited his answer, your palms growing sweaty. He thumbed at the hem, and your eyes widened.

“You looked good in it,” he hummed, returning to his seat. “Is it comfy?”

“Y-yeah.”

Despite how revealing the tank was, it was stretchy and soft, just as the more modest tracksuit was.

He gently smiled at you, the kind expression making your tension melt away. “Great.”

“Izumi!” Nanako called out, barreling toward you with Mimiko behind her. They each held stuffed toys, the blonde holding a rabbit that clutched a carrot, while her sister had a hamster that embraced an acorn. “Look!”

Giggling, she pressed the little carrot, and a recording of her voice flowed through a speaker hidden somewhere on the toy. “I like carrots…uh, chirp?”

You grinned at her. “Chirp?”

Her little cheeks turned pink. “I don’t know what sounds rabbits make.”

“They actually do chirp when they’re happy,” Geto revealed, making her beam.

“See, I told you,” Nanako boasted to her sister, who just rolled her eyes and pressed her button.

Unlike Nanako, Mimiko simply mimicked a rodent’s squeak, which was reminiscent of the rats that would sometime find their way into the cell. You surprised a shudder at the memory and instead turned your grin to the brunette.

“It sounds so real!”

A small smile spread across her lips, and she nodded, a twinkle in her dark eyes as you beamed at her. She smiled so rarely, that being graced with one nearly made you burst with joy.

“They’re like Build-A-Bears,” Geto commented, making all three of you look at him in confusion.

“Build-A-Bears?” you repeated with furrowed brows.

His grin faltered. “They’re stuffed animals you can customize, including what they say.”

The girls gasped, while you merely nodded. You hoped it was a newer company, so you wouldn’t look quite so ignorant.

“I’ll take you all some time, but for now, why don’t I get you girls those toys?” he asked, his smile returning full force.

Squeals flowed from them both, and you couldn’t contain the little laugh that escaped you from their joy. Toys were a privilege they hadn’t had in Kuroki, so you were thrilled that they got to experience the simple luxury now.

Once you returned to the dressing room, a thought that’d been lingering in the back of your mind forced itself to the forefront. Just how long did Geto intend for you all to stick together?

Chapter Text

“Stop moving,” Kai hissed into your ear as he ground against your clothed bottom. Somehow, he’d slipped away from his guardians to sneak into your prison and slip into your bed. “You want to eat, don’t you?”

The amount of food you got was already meager. Any less, and you’d starve to death. Despite everything, you were determined to survive, so you willed your body to still.

“Good girl,” he purred into your ear, grunting as he moved faster.

You bit your lip to stifle the sob that wanted to escape. You’d begun to dread the visits of your old friend. When he first came, you’d been happy to see him. Against all odds, you hoped you could patch things over.

Then, he’d crawled into your bed as he’d done tonight and used you until he was satisfied.

He had no intention of reconciling with you, you knew that now. The two of you were getting older, and that meant certain urges had started to set in. Instead of dealing with them on his own, Kai decided that you’d be the perfect way to rid himself of them.

It wasn’t like you could say no.

“Get rid of that thing,” he hissed as your shadow began to grow more active.

You opened your mouth to tell him that it sensed your distress, that’d it’d remain present all long as you were under duress, but only a squeak came out. He tsked.

“Can’t even control that damned thing, can you?”

You didn’t answer, too busy trying not to cry. The shadow was soon forgotten when a shuddering sigh left him. Then, he stilled, and you breathed a sigh of relief. He was finished.

Except, he wasn’t. Instead of getting up and leaving, the hand placed on your hip crept in between your thighs.

Dread coiled in your belly.

“Wh-what are you doing?” you stammered, trying to squirm away from him.

His grip held firm, not allowing you to move an inch. “Relax, you’d like it. The girls in the videos always do.”

You clenched your thighs together, not keen on finding out what ‘it’ was. You were satisfied with not knowing, though Kai was insistent. Your resistance proved not to be an issue for him, he was stronger than you, after all. His hand still slipped into your panties, his fingers caressing your entrance. A gasp was torn from you, and you began to struggle more. You managed to break free of his hold, but with a growl, Kai pulled right back into it. His fingers returned to your panties. Without warning, he sunk his teeth into your neck, breaking the skin.

******

You jolted up, a scream caught in your throat and your hands flying to your neck. Phantom hands wandered your body, making you feel sick. No matter how much they swiped at them, they wouldn’t go away. Even when you became aware of where you were – far away from Kuroki and Kai – you still felt his touch. His filthy touch tainted every inch of skin he encountered.

The very memory made you feel dirty, and your body ached with pains that had long ago faded.

You swiped at the tears flowing down your cheeks and threw the covers aside. The darkness started to get to you, your mind conjuring things that weren’t truly there. The moment you turned on the bedside lamp, it all disappeared. Looking over at the girls, you saw them soundly asleep, blissfully unaware of your torment.

Good. They were looking happier than they ever had before and seeing you in such a state would only risk robbing them of that. You refused to make them scared or worried, even if only briefly.

The front door opened, making you tense. To put your mind at ease, you spared a peek at the sofa bed Geto slept in. Sure enough, it was empty. On cue, he stepped in, the smell of cigarette smoke clinging to him and mixing with his scent.

“Oh, hey,” he greeted, brows raised in surprise, the butt of the burned-out cigarette still hanging from his lips. “It’s 3 AM. Why are you up?”

“I can ask the same of you,” you murmured, watching his every move.

He removed his slippers and tossed the butt into the trashcan by the door. Instead of going back to his bed, he came to yours. Your anxiety shot up, and you tried your best to take up as much space as possible. It wouldn’t do much if he really wanted to get in, but you refused to make it easy for him.

His thumb brushed over the hand closest to him, which was tightly gripping the comforter. Your heart felt like it was about to pound out of your chest.

“What’s wrong?” he questioned, grasping a hand with his when your hold began to loosen.

You quickly yanked it back. “Please stop touching me so much. I don’t like it.”

Though his touch was always gentle and faint, unlike Kai’s, it was still performed by a man you barely knew. You didn’t want to give him the wrong idea.

His face twisted into a frown, and for a moment, you worried that you had set him off. For all his kindness, he might feel like he was owed something that you weren’t willing to give. You had no clue what you would do if it came to that. For the sake of the girls, it was best for you to take whatever he dished. Yet, for your peace of mind, you had to set boundaries.

Fortunately, no ultimatum was given. He just nodded and offered you the soft smile you were growing used to.

“I apologize. I wasn’t aware-”

“It’s fine,” you interrupted. It was rude, you knew, but you didn’t feel like chatting. You wanted to go and wash away a touch that’d long ago disappeared. “Just…ask, please.”

“I can do that,” he agreed without a moment of hesitation.

You searched his eyes for an emotion that contradicted his words, but you found none. All you saw was sympathy.

“I’m, uhm, going to take a shower.”

He opened his mouth, then closed it, swallowing whatever words he was about to say. He just moved out of your way. As you padded to the bathroom, you felt his stare on you.

You quickly locked the door and started the shower, disrobing as the water heated up. You avoided looking in the mirror, not wanting to see any of the scars left on you.

You stepped into the shower/bathtub combo and let the scolding hot water flow over you. Each pellet of water stung, but the heat was comforting. Grabbing your rough washcloth, you slathered it in the body wash Geto bought and got to scrubbing. The primary scent was sandalwood and coconuts, with more subtle hints of lavender and tuberose. They all complimented one another and created a blend that soothed your frayed nerves.

Most importantly, it washed the memory of Kai’s touch down the drain.

There was a brief time when you and Kai were friends. A time you welcomed his touch. Perhaps, if you hadn’t been imprisoned, your relationship would’ve naturally progressed past friendship. Instead, a singular event saw it rapidly deteriorate, to the point where he no longer saw your humanity, or cared about your agency.

His disdain for you never stopped him from using you for pleasure, it simply took away any guilt or gentleness he may have felt.

You scrubbed harder, leaving your skin pink and irritated. You relented for a moment and allowed the water to wash away the soap. But the moment it was gone, that feeling came back, causing you to squeeze out more body wash and scrub again. Only when dots of blood began to appear on the washcloth did you yield. Irritated skin wouldn’t get rid of the memories and would only bring about a new set of problems.

Knowing that, however, didn’t stop your breaths from growing labored as you recalled the nightmare memory. Panic began to settle into you, making it hard to do anything but gasp for air. A bout of dizziness threw you off balance, and you leaned against the tiled wall to stabilize yourself.

As stupid as it was, you were having an anxiety attack. When oxygen refused to stay in your lungs, you remembered the breathing technique Geto taught you. Inhale, hold, exhale, repeat. The steps were simple but effective.

You drew in a shaky breath, and held it for seven seconds, then released it as slowly as possible. You did it three more times, only stopping when your breathing returned to normal, and your mind gave you a break from the torture.

******

When you came out of the steaming bathroom, Geto was back on the sofa bed, though he was still awake. He watched you as you silently returned to yours.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

You shook your head. “No, thank you.”

You knew better than to divulge sensitive information to someone you just met.

You paused in front of the mattress, your brows furrowing at the gift box that rested on your pillow. You picked it up and turned to Geto, who now wore a small grin.

“What’s this?”

“Open it,” he urged, rolling his eyes when you continued to stare at him. “It’s nothing bad, I swear.”

“I don’t like surprises,” you confessed.

Almost every surprise you’d endured thus far was negative, and you had no reason to believe that trend wouldn’t continue.

“This is a good one, I promise. The girls helped me pick it out.”

That is what got you to open it tentatively. A gasp left you once you did. Nestled at the bottom of the cardboard was a drawing pad with 100 sheets, enough to last you weeks. A black case lay on top of it. This time, you didn’t hesitate to unzip it. A smile broke across your face, your eyes growing misty at the dozens of colored pencils inside. You were fond of drawing, and for so long, you’d be limited to charcoal and thin paper. Now, you’d be able to freely indulge in your hobby, with the only confines being the page itself.

“The girls said you enjoyed drawing. We figured you’d like it.” Geto revealed, bringing your attention back to him. “They wanted all of us to gift it to you, but I figure you could use a pick me up now.”

“They’re going to be disappointed,” you chided, swiping at your eyes.

Unlike earlier, they were tears of joy. Even when you were among blood relatives, you seldom received gifts. The girls picking out something you’d adore, and a stranger being kind enough to buy it, nearly made your heart burst.

“I’m sure they’d understand,” Geto said, staring as you placed the items back in the box. “They’d just be happy that it made you happy.”

“I do like drawing,” you confirmed. “Can I put this back in the duffle? And don’t tell them you gave it to me.”

Tomorrow, you’d let them give it to you as intended, and act as if you’d never seen such a thing before. It made you happy knowing what awaited you.

His grin grew, and you couldn’t help but return it. “Don’t worry, I won’t say a word. And it was in there.”

He motioned to the room’s lone armchair, which held the extra duffle.

You hummed and carried the box to the bag. Unzipping it, you wiggled it in the available space when some books caught your attention. They were similar to your new drawing pad, but the cover was more childish, and the words were shaped differently. Right next to it were crayons.

You picked up one of the books. “What’s this?”

You had an idea of what it was, but the words were too distorted for you to confirm. Your difficulty with reading was a source of embarrassment, but you decided to ignore your shame for now. You’d stressed yourself out enough.

“A coloring book,” he answered, showing no judgment for the question. “The girls said you used to color together, so I got that for them.”

The revelation of his kindness erased your earlier turmoil, but it spawned a question.

“Uhm, why?”

He cocked a brow. “Why what?”

“Why’d you get us stuff?”

“You don’t want it?”

You hurriedly shook your head. You didn’t want him to think you were ungrateful, but you were curious about what spurred him to do this. It was peculiar enough to help a few strangers, but it was even weirder to gift them things for no reason.

“I want it, just…why?”

He heaved a sigh. “I told you the other day, you all are my responsibility now. I have to make sure you all are happy.”

“…Why?”

He chuckled, the sound making you go red. “I’d be an awful caregiver if my wards were miserable.”

“I mean, like, you don’t know us,” you explained, his words doing nothing to help your blush. “Why are you helping?”

It was hard for you to wrap your head around the idea of someone caring for you – looking out for you – just because. You used to dream of such a person saving you, but you’d long ago destroyed that fantasy. Because that’s all it was, a fantasy, one that’d only lead to pain or delusions. But Geto was slowly reviving that dream, which scared you. He hadn’t yet presented you with terms for his assistance, but you knew it was only a matter of time.

“I thought already told you that I can’t resist helping damsels in distress.”

You huffed out a breath. “That’s not a reason! Just…what do you want?”

“Is it so hard to believe that I just want to help?”

What a dumb question, of course it was.

“Yes.”

He held up his hands in mock surrender. “I just want some company, sue me. And I couldn’t in good faith leave 3 helpless girls in the middle of nowhere.”

But how long will he want company? How long until he grew tired of taking care of you, Mimiko, and Nanako? It was too soon for him to say he didn’t mind. The four of you hadn’t even been together for a week.

You put the book back and zipped up the duffle, then returned to your bed. That was a question to worry about another time, not in the middle of the night. The only thing you could do was make a game plan for when you and the girls parted ways with Geto, and that’d be difficult to do without sleep.

Turning off the lamp, you decided to let the conversation end on a good note. As you lay back down and tucked yourself in, Geto called out to you. “Izumi?”

“Yeah?” you murmured, exhaustion washing over you.

Having a spontaneous breakdown really did take a lot out of a person.

“Goodnight,” he said around a yawn, triggering one of your own.

“Night,” you returned, snuggling into your pillow.

Against all odds, you drifted off with a small smile on your lips.

Chapter Text

Jostling pulled you from your slumber, hushed giggles traveling to you as you woke up.

“Izumi,” Nanako called, the shaking growing more intense. “Wake up!”

With a groan, you cracked an eye open, the twins’ smiling faces greeting you. “I’m up.”

“Nuh-uh,” Mimiko protested, her hands behind her back. “You’re still laying down.

With a sigh, you sat up. A quick glance at the clock on the bedside table revealed it to be past noon, making your eyes widen. The sound of running water bled through the walls and let you know that the bathroom was occupied.

“Okay, now I’m up,” you said through a yawn.

They shared a look, and Nanako nodded, prompting Mimiko to bring her hands forward, a familiar box in her grasp. A smile spread across your face as you accepted it.

“What’s this?” you asked with faux surprise, already knowing the contents of the box.

“Open it,” the blonde urged.

Nodding, you removed the lid and pulled out the drawing supplies you’d discovered last night. You dramatically gasped and allowed your jaw to slacken.

“Surprise!” the girls chimed in unison.

You retrieved the drawing pad and colored pencils, flipping through the tablet and unzipping the black case, another fake gasp leaving you at the sight of the variety of colors. Setting your gifts aside, you hopped out of bed and swept them into a hug, which they readily returned. Though your surprise was fake, your gratitude and happiness were a hundred percent genuine.

“Thank you so much!” you exclaimed, laughing along with them as they started to giggle anew.

“You’re welcome,” Mimiko said, as Nanako revealed, “Geto got us coloring books, so we can draw together again!”

Excitement swamped you at the prospect. When the three of you were locked up, the hobby was the only source of entertainment and seldom had to be done due to the limited supplies. That was no longer the case, and you were eager to put your new supplies to use.

“You girls gave it to her?” Geto asked. They nodded as you separated, and he smiled at you three as he sat on the sofa. “Did she like it?”

He was dressed in his normal T-shirt and sweatpants, and his damp hair was piled on top of his head. Even when half-wet, the thickness of his hair was enviable, and it always looked soft to the touch.

“I loved it,” you answered, returning his grin, thankful that he was keeping last night a secret. “The best present ever.”

“See, what did I tell you two?” he asked.

“Whatever,” Nanako huffed, eliciting chuckles from both you and Geto.

“What are we doing today?” you questioned as you walked to the duffle bag.

The four of you had been staying in the same motel for some days now, and you were guessing it was almost time to move on. You didn’t know much about being on the run, but you did know that being stationary was a risk.

“Coloring?” Mimiko proposed, hope in her voice.

“Can we?” Nanako asked, sounding just as enthusiastic.

Geto hummed, and after a moment of contemplation, he nodded. “Coloring is good. We need to eat, first. I’ll order some soba while you three get ready.”

The girls squealed at the announcement, and you nearly did, too. It’d been years since you had soba, and a day of drawing and relaxing sounded tantalizing.

“That sounds so good,” you sighed, your mouth watering at the memory of the noodles. “Hot or cold?”

You’d always preferred them cold, as the broth resulted in more mess.

“Cold,” Geto said, making you mentally cheer. “Easier to transport.”

You nodded, your mouth watering as you started to rummage through the duffle. Geto’s search for clothing had buried yours and the girls, putting his at the forefront. Immediately, you noticed how soft the black fabric was, and when you mistakenly pulled his shirt out instead of yours, an aroma akin to your beloved body wash wafted to you.

Maybe, it wouldn’t hurt if you wore his shirt for the day. After all, he’d lent you clothes before.

Steeling your nerves and taking in a breath, you turned to Geto, shirt in hand. “Geto?”

He was thumbing through a takeout menu, not bothering to look up as you called his name. “Hmm?”

“Can I wear this?”

He looked up. If you weren’t looking at him so closely, you would’ve missed the way his foxlike eyes widened ever so slightly. He swallowed, then nodded, his expression morphing into a grin.

“Yeah, go ahead. We’re not going anywhere.”

His tongue swiped over his lips, and then he returned to thumbing through the menu. You breathed a sigh of relief at his easy acceptance and finished fishing out clothing for you and the girls.

“Girls,” you said, catching their attention. You nodded toward the bathroom. “We have to get ready.”

They quickly hopped over the bed and hurried over without a word.

******

Geto observed you as you ushered the girls into the bathroom, his leg bouncing as his sweatpants grew tighter. The moment he heard the faucets running, he threw the menu to the side and freed his aching cock, beads of precum leaking from the tip. If he was going to get through the day, he needed to take care of the problem you’d caused. Images of fucking you while you only wore his shirt flickered through his head as he stroked his shaft.

How many times would he have to fuck you before you could ride him with ease? His dick twitched at the thought of training you to take him in every position.

Hygiene and proper nutrition were doing wonders for you, making Geto want you even more. Regular meals had given you curves in areas you once lacked. Taking care of your hair was making your strands shine, and the more relaxed you grew, the glowier you became.

He needed to have you, and soon.

He looked longingly at the plastic bag acting as a hamper. His mouth watered at the thought of retrieving an…intimate item of yours, but he quickly pushed the thought out of his head. He didn’t have time for that; he needed to hurry. The three of you didn’t take long to get ready, and the food had to be ordered. But, dammit, you made it hard to focus.

******

“Foods on the way,” Geto announced as you three strolled out of the bathroom, looking more relaxed than when you went in.

“Can we color while we wait?” Nanako asked, her little mind set on doodling.

“I don’t see why not,” you said, looking to Geto for confirmation.

He nodded and stood from the couch. “Go for it.”

“Join us?” Mimiko requested.

He aimed a smile her way. “When I get out.”

With that, he returned to the unoccupied bathroom. Immediately, you heard the sink faucets running. Choosing not to question it, you retrieved the drawing supplies, giggling as the girls bounced on their heels.

“Whose coloring book whose?”

“We share both of them,” Nanako announced with pride, before snatching the one closest to you from your hands. “But I’ll take this one.”

Rolling your eyes, you handed the other one to Mimiko, who eagerly accepted it. With that issue being sorted out, the three of you settled on the floor, you in the middle. You dumped your pencils out to give the girls access to them, and they did the same with the crayons, giving you all a wide array of options. A short time ago, you would’ve never imagined that you’d ever have access to such a thing.

“What are we drawing?” Geto asked as he joined you three, seating himself across from you.

“Anything you want,” you said, tearing out a sheet of paper for him.

You felt a twinge of guilt that he didn’t have a drawing pad of his own to work on, but it quickly went away. It was his money; he could’ve bought one for himself.

“Draw us,” Nanako said with a grin.

He faltered and let out an awkward laugh. “That may be beyond my capabilities.”

“You don’t know until you try,” Mimiko encouraged, though the mischievous glint in her eyes contradicted her words.

“How about I draw you, and you draw us?” you offered, to which he nodded in agreement.

“Sounds like a plan,” he said as he turned his attention to the paper, you and the girls doing the same.

You all fell silent as you focused on creating your artwork, the sounds of scribbling and rustling paper all to be heard. You made quick work of the outline, stealing frequent glances at Geto to create as accurate an image as possible. Your staring intensified when it came time to add the details. A crease was present between his brows as he concentrated on his page, his dark eyes narrowed in concentration. The corners of his pale pink lips were tugged down. It was easy to tell when he got particularly frustrated because he’d chew on his bottom lip, soft groans leaving him. Strands of his midnight hair escaped his sloppy bun, falling forward as he leaned over. You paid extra attention to the veins running along his muscular arms, something about them being incredibly fascinating to you.

He, likewise, peeped at you and the girls several times. When you caught him looking at you, you’d offer him a smile, which he’d return.

“Done!” Nanako announced as you were adding the finishing touches to your drawing.

“Me too,” Mimiko murmured, both girls turning their coloring backs around to display what they created.

Nanako’s scene depicted a cartoonish beach with an absurd number of details, the whimsical colors she’d chosen making it look alien. She often strayed out of the lines, but she managed to blend the colors together to make it look intentional. Mimiko, meanwhile, had colored a forest that featured an array of mythical creatures. It looked like a scene out of a fairytale, and she did a much better job at staying within the boundaries.

All in all, both girls did a great job, and the excited pride on their faces made you beam.

“You both did so good!” you squealed, setting the pad on the floor and holding out your hands for them to high-five.

When you first introduced them to the concept, it thoroughly confused them, which broke your heart. Just like you, their life prior to imprisonment must’ve been lacking. But after a year of being together, they were well aware of what to do.

“Thank you,” they echoed, before turning their attention to your drawing, and Nanako peered her neck to see the drawing. “Are you done?”

“Almost, I just need to add some finishing touches,” you said, picking the pad back up.

You were so busy focusing on the little details that you overlooked some very important parts. In particular, coloring in his clothes. Once that was done, your drawing of Geto would be complete.

“I’m done,” Geto announced, flipping his sheet of paper around. Immediately, the girls broke into fits of giggles, making him frown. “Hey, I did the best I could!”

Truth be told, it wasn’t that bad. He’d drawn the three of you in a cartoonish style with exaggerated features, but he’d gotten the color palette and hairstyles correct. You could tell he struggled with hands and noses, but the childish nature of the drawing added a certain charm to it.

“It’s not that bad,” you said as the girls continued their laughing. “It’s cute.”

He grumbled something under his breath and shot Nanako and Mimiko the stink eye as they quieted down, before refocusing on you. “Are you done yet?”

“Yes,” you announced, placing the pencil you’d used to shade in his pants on the ground. “I just finished.”

Without further ado, you showed the drawing to the girls first, making them ooh and aah. Geto’s eyes grew more curious.

“It’s so good!” Nanako praised, to which Mimiko nodded in agreement.

Just as you’d done with them, they both held out their little hands for a high-five. You passed the drawing to Geto, then clapped your hands against theirs as he analyzed it. He grazed his thumb over the paper, his expression soft and impressed.

“This is amazing,” he breathed, flipping the sheet over and holding it up to his face. “It looks just like me!”

“It does,” the twins hummed as their eyes darted between the paper and Geto.

Prior to meeting them, you believed ‘twin telepathy’ was a myth. Mimiko and Nanako made you believe otherwise. Even with glaring differences, they were very in tune with each other.

He pouted; the look being comical to you. “You put mine to shame.”

“She did,” Nanako agreed before you get anything out.

“Nanako,” you chided, though a giggle robbed you of seriousness.

Knocking on the door cut the conversation short, and Geto stood. “That must be the food.”

It was indeed the food. The smell of it wafted through the plastic bag.

“It smells yummy!” Nanako exclaimed as Geto dished out the food.

You nodded in agreement, your mouth watering and your stomach loudly rumbling, making your hunger known. “What’d you get with the soba?”

“Ginger soy sauce and vegetable tempura,” he said, handing you your plate.

You noticed Geto had gotten the girls some training chopsticks, and when he handed you a regular set, you wished you’d received a pair, too. Yes, you’d used chopsticks before, but after a decade of using your hands to eat, you weren’t too confident in your abilities.

Mimiko frowned and inspected the sticks. “How do we use these?”

They were so young, you doubted they had much experience with them, even before being locked up and having no access to utensils.

“Can we use our hands?” Nanako asked.

“It’s not that hard,” you said, deciding to be encouraging. Recalling what you’d been taught, you grabbed both chopsticks with one hand and lined them up, then shifted them until the bottoms were crisscrossing. “See? And you have a training pair, so it’d be easier.”

They mimicked you. Their mouths dropped open when they successfully picked up a piece of tempura, and you clapped. With a chuckle, Geto joined in on applauding them, making the twins beam at you both.

“You did it!” you praised.

“We did it!” Nanako echoed, holding out a hand to her sister who high-fived her.

The gesture was a favorite of theirs and was used as a form of celebration. Until recently, you three hadn’t had much to celebrate. Now, things were different, so high-fiving was more frequent.

The girls began to eat, so you turned your focus to your food. Immediately, you went for the soba, anticipation setting in as your chopsticks touched the noodles.

Except, you couldn’t seem to pick them up.

Your brows furrowed as the noddle slipped right through the sticks, a frown coming over your lips when a second attempt got the same results. Failing to acquire the noodles, you switched your attention to the tempura. However, that was also a challenge for you. So, you simply stabbed a piece with the stick, nearly making Geto choke.

A few coughs later, he set his plate aside. “Do you need help, Izumi?”

Your cheeks heated, embarrassed at your inadequacy. Still, you nodded and were put at ease when Geto gave you a tender smile.

“Okay,” he said, scooting closer to you. He grabbed a chopstick from you. “First, hold the upper stick like you would a pencil.”

He demonstrated what he meant, and you copied him. “Like this?”

“Yes, just like that!” He took your free hand and placed the other stick against your ring finger, gently rubbing his thumb along your palm and making you even redder. “Hold the second one with the base of your thumb.” You did so, but apparently, it wasn’t correct because he adjusted it. “Make sure they’re pointed in the same direction. Now you just move the upper stick with your thumb, index, and middle fingers.”

You frowned at him; doubtful it was so simple. Still, you tried it, again going for the soba noodles. A grin broke across your face when you were able to pick a few up. Slowly, you moved them to the ginger soy sauce. As it was hovering over the chunky liquid, your hold on the stick slipped. The noodles plopped down in the sauce and splattered some of it on the floor. A groan left you, and you threw the sticks on your plate, planting your face in your hands.

“Why is this so hard?”

A small hand patted your knee, and you peeked through your fingers to see Mimiko giving you a sympathetic look. Rustling caught your attention, and you let your hands drop. Geto grabbed your sticks and placed the paper they came in between them. Then, he tied them with a rubber band, mimicking training chopsticks.

“Here, now try,” he said, handing them back to you.

You took them and followed his previous directions, fishing the noodles out of the sauce and bringing them to your mouth. Their dip in the soy sauce made them a tad too salty, but that was easily ignored in leu of how good they tasted. A satisfied moan escaped you. Geto’s eye widened, and he shifted.

“Good?” he questioned.

You gave him a thumbs up, overjoyed that you’d finally gotten your soba. “Delicious!”

******

Following food, the girls begged you to draw some more, and you eagerly agreed. Geto had opted to just watch you, his pride apparently stung from the girls laughing at him. Now, hours later, the four of you lounged on the couch. Geto was on one side of you, and the girls on the other. The coloring supplies were cast aside and forgotten as the twins began to doze off. A gasp left you as Nanako planted her head in your lap, and Mimiko soon used her sister as a pillow, trapping you in place.

You ran a hand over the blonde’s hair. “Looks like drawing all day wore them out.”

“I guess so,” he agreed with a small laugh. “It’s a strenuous activity.”

“Rough on the hands,” you joked.

Your encounter together after your nightmare made you more comfortable with him, enough so that you didn’t mind that your bodies were pressed together.

“I might be stuck here for the night,” you murmured as the twin’s breathing began to even out.

“I happen to be very comfortable to sleep on,” Geto quipped.

“No,” you disagreed without thinking. If you could’ve, you would’ve slapped a hand over your mouth.

“No?” he repeated, cocking a brow. “How would you know?”

“You’re…hard. Not soft, like a good pillow or bed,” you explained sheepishly, Geto’s wide-eyed expression making you want to slap yourself. “Forget I said anything, please.”

He didn’t.

“You’re wrong,” he declared, smirking as you grew more flustered. He slung an arm around your shoulder, letting it hover an inch or so away. “May I demonstrate?”

You nodded, appreciating that he heeded your words from last night and asked first. But you were already touching him, so it wouldn’t change much.

He wrapped it around you and guided your head to his chest. Even with his torso covered by his shirt’s soft fabric, you could feel how strong he was. He was a solid mass of muscle, just as you’d said. But, after a few adjustments, you found he was in fact comfy.

“So, what’s the verdict?” he asked, stroking the top of your bicep.

Instinctively, you leaned into his touch. Against all odds, you felt safe in the arms of a man you barely knew. You could hear the steady beating of his heart, the sound relaxing you further.

“You’re comfy,” you grumbled, smiling when he chuckled.

“See, what’d I tell you?”

You huffed out a breath as your eyes grew heavy. “Whatever, you were right.”

He looked down at you, another laugh leaving him as he saw how you struggled to keep your eyes open. “Go to sleep, Izumi. We have a long day tomorrow.”

You stared at him questioningly. “What’s tomorrow?”

“I’ll tell you in the morning. Now, sleep.”

Your brows still furrowed, you decided to just follow his advice and allow your eyes to close. In no time, the girls’ soft snores and Geto’s heartbeat lulled you to sleep. Vaguely, you registered a kiss being pressed to the top of your head, and the content sigh that left you.

Chapter Text

“Tokyo?” You and the girls chorused.

The sun was just beginning to peak over the horizon. Geto had gotten you all up at the crack of dawn, stating that you needed to be on the road as soon as possible. Despite his previous promise of an explanation, he had yet to give one, only stating the end destination.

“That’s right,” Geto said as he packed up your belongings. “You’ll love it, don’t worry.”

Your eyebrows shot up, and you paused, the shirt you intended to fold dangling in your hands. “Why are we going to Tokyo?”

His movements didn’t falter, even when he aimed a smile your way. “I have business there.”

“Aren’t you from Tokyo?”

He nodded and took the shirt from you, stuffing it in the bag without bothering to fold it. “Correct, Izumi.”

You're unsure why he would return to the city he was banished from.

“I thought—”

“Don’t worry,” he repeated, stopping to grasp your hands, which felt puny in his strong grip. “I’m going to handle everything.”

Something about the way he said the word was ominous, and the fact that he was returning to the city he was running from was suspicious. You knew you were missing something, perhaps lacking an important piece of information. However, Geto had yet to lead you and the girls astray. As difficult as it was for you to trust, you knew that Geto wouldn’t lead the four of you into danger. If nothing else, you believed he’d protect you against any threat that’d come your way.

So, you just squeezed his hand back—which made his eyes turn into saucers—and smiled. “Okay, Geto.”

With that, you assisted him in arranging all your possessions in the duffle bags, trying to ignore the nagging little voice in the back of your mind. Ten minutes later, the motel room that’d sheltered you all for days was cleared out.

“Do we need to check out?” you asked as Geto ushered you and the twins out of the room.

He carried both duffle bags as if they weighed nothing, despite both being filled to the brim.

He shook his head. “Nah, I took care of it.”

You nodded. As always, he had everything all planned out. His foresight was admirable.

A short walk later, you’re all at the bus stop. You didn’t have to wait long, because less than five minutes later, the bus rolled up. After a payment of 6,000 yen, you were all seated for the long bus ride to Tokyo. It’d take four hours to travel from Nagoya to Tokyo, and you thanked whoever resided above that the bus wasn’t crowded, likely due to the time.

You’d taken a window seat, and Geto sat next to you, blocking you from the view of other passengers. The girls sat across, using each other as pillows. The early hour you all rose had worn you and them out. Geto was alert as always. No matter the hour, he never showed signs of exhaustion. You loudly yawned, and Geto chuckled.

“Get some sleep, Izumi. It’s going to be a long ride.”

You followed his directions. The peaceful emptiness enabled you to easily shut your eyes, and sleep would allow you to not dwell on the doubt lingering in your mind. However, the uncomfortable bus seats made it hard to get comfy enough to slumber. You shifted and repositioned yourself a million times, before sighing in defeat and sitting up straight. As soon as you did, Geto pulled your head down to rest on his shoulder, drawing a squeak from you.

“I think I’m more comfortable than the seats,” he teased, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “So, feel free to use me.”

His voice dropped an octave, and a blush crept up your face. He was indeed lovely to sleep on, but his words and proximity conjured new feelings in you. Still, you forced yourself to relax and snuggled into him. His scent was sweet and floral and calmed you immediately. He always smelled heavenly, and today was no exception.

A hand crept to your hair, and he began to massage your scalp. “Is this okay?”

A sigh left you, his kneading touch rendering your mind blank. Unable to form words, you just nodded, content with staying like that for the rest of the bus ride.

******

Geto jostled you awake when the bus finally arrived in Tokyo, before gathering the girls and the bags you’d packed. As you all trickled off the bus, you noticed a man wearing a business suit loitering near an alleyway across the street, eyeing the four of you while he smoked a cigarette. He had short black hair and a thin mustache. As Geto led you over to him, the man’s dark eyes glanced between the two of you. The girls gripped the leg of your pants, and you shielded yourself behind Geto’s broad body.

“Shiu,” he greeted with a smile.

The man—Shiu—gave an acknowledging nod. “You got a family now, kid?”

His eyes roamed over you, his leer making your skin crawl. The way he looked at you reminded you of Kai, and it sickened you. You inched closer to Geto. He’d never looked at you with anything but warmth and kindness.

“Don’t worry about them,” Geto said. His smile remained, but his voice became more strained, his body tensing as Shiu continued to stare at you. Geto tried to block you from view. “Stop looking at her.”

Geto snuck a hand behind his back, subtly offering it to you. Instead of intertwining your fingers, you just grabbed his pinkie, a more comfortable alternative at that moment.

Shiu cocked a thin brow. “She your girl?”

Your eyes widened at the question. It took you aback, and even as your heart fluttered, you opened your mouth to deny it. However, Geto spoke first.

“Yes, so keep your eyes to yourself.”

Your pulse began to speed up. You flushed at the thought, gripping his finger tighter. You didn’t know why he said that, but seeing as it got Shiu to focus on Geto instead of you, you didn’t care. And some part of you didn’t mind the idea. The TV shows you watched as a child would always depict couples with similar dynamics to you and Geto. A strong man would protect a helpless woman, leading to a romance blossoming. To you, it was a fairytale situation, something that’d never happen to you.

But, not too long ago, you thought the same thing about your freedom. Yet here you were in Tokyo, miles away from Kuroki and your tormentors. Who’s to say that you couldn’t have a complete happily ever after, an enchanting romance included? And when you imagined that scenario, you could only picture Geto as the man at your side. No one else had ever protected you as he had, and admittedly, he was easy on the eyes.

A poke to your leg snapped you out of your thoughts. “Izumi?” Nanako said, her brows furrowed. “Geto is talking to you.”

You cleared your throat. “Y-yeah?”

His smirk didn’t help your growing embarrassment. “Your size, Izumi. What is it?”

Your brows furrowed, and you tilt your head to the side, your embarrassment forgotten. “Why?”

Shiu snickered. “You got yourself an airhead, Geto?”

And just like that, your shame came right back.

Geto aimed a sneer his way. “Watch your mouth, Shiu. I don’t need you to accomplish my goals.”

His tone was low and threatening, dangerous enough to shut Shiu up. The corners of your lips tugged upward as the older man went quiet, your gratitude toward Geto growing.

“Now,” Geto said, his amiable tone returning as he refocused on you. “Do you know your clothing size, Izumi?”

At his repeated question, you shook your head. “No.”

“That’s all right, the lady could measure her,” Shiu said, his voice holding a formalness it lacked moments ago.

“For what?’ you asked, thoroughly confused.

That is what you get for getting lost in your fantasies.

“We need nicer clothing,” Geto explained as Shiu began to lead you all deeper into the alleyway.

“Why?” Nanako questioned, just as curious as you.

Geto’s grin grew, and if you didn’t know better, you’d dare to say it was menacing. “Because we’re going to do something very special, and we need to look the part.”

“Here we are,” Shiu said, approaching a well-hidden door.

He knocked three times, and an eye-level slot slid open. He muttered something. Whatever it was, it granted entry. You gasped as you stepped foot into the mystery building. It was a boutique. Mannequins modeled traditional formal wear that looked luxurious in quality, and racks held an abundance of fabric and clothes. An older woman emerged from a curtain, a measuring tape around her neck. The middle-school-aged boy that opened the door went behind the counter and plopped on a stool, ignoring you all as he began to read a book.

The woman looked at Shiu. “This is the fugitive?”

The fugitive? Your brows furrowed, and you stared at Geto, hoping for an explanation. None was given.

He held out his free hand. “Yep! It’s nice to meet you.”

She didn’t take it, instead focusing on you and the girls. “And they’re…”

“My family,” he supplied.

You deflated; his words contradicted what he’d told Shiu. If he saw you as family, then it’d be impossible to be his girl, because he’d hold no romantic affection for you. For some reason, that bothered you, though you know it shouldn’t. He’d said himself he was merely your protector, and up until a few days ago, you struggled to trust him. It was silly of you to be upset.

“I’ll be around,” Shiu said before making his exit.

“Girls, take a look around,” Geto said, tugging his pinkie from your grip. Disappointment swapped you at the loss of contact. “I have to talk to Ms.…?”

“Aoki,” she provided. “Shiu informed me what you wanted…if the girls pick out something premade, it’d be a quick process.”

Geto nodded and followed the woman as she went behind the counter. You guided the girls to what seemed to be the children’s section. Immediately, something caught their eye. Nanako gravitated toward a pale blue kimono with pink flowers, with Mimiko eyed a plain red kimono with an elaborate green obi belt with bright floral embroidery.

“This one,” they say in unison, neither bothering to look at other selections.

Geto looked over his shoulder, the small space allowing their voices to carry. “That was quick.”

Ms. Aoki nodded and came around the counter. She pulled at the tag, then wrote something down on a pad. Then, she turned to you.

“Are you ready too, ma’am?”

You shook your head. “No, I still need to look.”

“Very well. I’ll prepare the girls’ selections.”

With that, she returned to behind the curtain. Geto, apparently having preordered his attire, sat on a small bench by the door.

“Take all the time you need, Izumi.”

You nodded. The girls continued to stare in awe at their kimonos, while you made your way to the women’s section. Unlike Nanako and Mimiko, you had a harder time making up your mind. There were so many options, all gorgeous and vibrant, that it was almost overwhelming. For so long, you hadn’t had a say in what you wore. Now, you had an abundance of options, with no way of deciding between them.

Geto must’ve noticed your issue because he made his way to your side. “Need some help?”

“There’s just so many options…”

“Overwhelming, isn’t it?”

You nodded, relieved you didn’t have to explain yourself. He chuckled and offered his pinkie up. You stared dumbly at it, before grabbing it as you had earlier. He smiled, then guided you through the store. He walked with a purpose, seemingly having his eye on something.

“Did you know hakama arrived in Japan at the same time as Buddhism? That’s why priests and Miko wear them,” he said as he stopped in front of a vibrantly dressed mannequin. “It was a ceremonial garment before being adapted by the samurai class to protect their legs.”

You were impressed by his knowledge.

“Really?” you breathed, unable to say anything else.

You were too enchanted by the outfit in front of you to say anything of substance. The hakamashita was emerald green and decorated with yellow embroidered flowers. The hakama was a striking cobalt blue, and the waist was accentuated with a golden obi belt that was tied into a bow. It was gorgeous, and it almost felt like an offense for you to imagine yourself in something so beautiful.

He noticed your reaction and grinned down at you. “You like it?”

You nodded. “I love it.”

“Hakama are less restrictive than kimonos, so you’ll be more comfortable.”

That was a huge plus, in your book. You were never a fan of restrictive garments.

“That’s why they’re used in sporting events,” you hummed.

Your father had been fond of Kyūdō. As a child, you’d been awed by the women who participated, of how they managed to look so pretty and regal whilst displaying such strength and skill with their bows.

“You know, my robes are green, yellow, and blue, too,” he declared, the satisfaction in his voice making you fuzzy inside. “We’ll be matching.”

How pleased he sounded made you smile. You didn’t know why it was suddenly so important that he made it clear that the two of you were acquainted. Just days ago, you’d been preparing for you and the twins to part ways with him. You suppose your change of heart was because he’d earned your trust. And maybe, just maybe, you’d grown fond of Geto Suguru.

Chapter Text

Once you were dressed in the attire Geto had chosen for you, he’d been unable to move his eyes from you. The hakama he’d had picked was quickly tailored to your form, complimenting your figure, and highlighting every curve you possessed. The colors made you pop, and it satisfied him that the two of you were matching.

You were truly a vision, and based on how you were gawking at yourself in the mirror, you were inclined to agree with his accession.

“Do you like it?” Geto questioned as the four of you awaited Ms. Aoki’s return.

She needed to retrieve something to finish off the fitting, but she was taking her sweet time.

“I love it,” you breathed, fidgeting with the bow.

The golden bow was a favorite detail of his. It reminded him of the ones stuck on top of presents, and you were one he’d love to unwrap. He licked his lips.

“That’s good.” He smiled at you, easily concealing the impure thoughts going through his mind. “You look amazing in it.”

You blushed. “You think so?”

He couldn’t help but chuckle. Your coyness was adorable.

“I do,” he confirmed with a nod. “You look like a princess.”

Your blush spread and his grin broadened.

“No,” Nanako said, interrupting the moment and making his grin slacken.

He looked at the blonde child, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly. He was fond of the little girls and saw great potential in them. He’d be proud to aid you in the task of raising them. However, like all children, they had the tendency to be annoying at times. Take now, for instance.

Your face fell. “No?”

“She’s right,” Mimiko chimed, making Geto turn his gaze to her. “You can’t be a princess.”

He knew the girls weren’t being malicious, that they were just passing on their opinion. Being so young, they had no concept of a filter, meaning that their thoughts weren’t worded in the most gracious of manners. Yet, knowing this didn’t stop his irritation. The way you looked at your reflection went from admiring to critical, earning the twins his glower.

Still, being an adult, he knew he had to be amiable with them, and gently correct their behavior.

“And why can’t she be a princess?” he asked calmly, making you and the twins look at him.

“Well,” Mimiko began, fidgeting in her seat. “We’d be the princesses.”

For the life of him, he couldn’t see the logic in that statement. He’s sure in their world, it made perfect sense because children were truly strange creatures.

Geto’s brows furrowed. “So, because you two are the princesses…can’t Izumi be one, too?”

“No, silly, she’s the queen!” Nanako exclaimed, looking at him as if he was the weird one for not understanding.

“I am?” you squeaked, your expression going from crestfallen to surprised.

“Remember the stories you used to tell us when we were trapped?” Mimiko inquired.

You nodded, the reminder of Kuroki making you frown further. Geto regretted not making sure every residence of that blasted village was dead, instead only slaughtering those that were easy to get to. He had bigger problems at the time, such as ensuring your freedom, so he couldn’t be as thorough as he would’ve liked.

“Okay, so, in the stories, the princesses were always little girls who needed saving, like me and Mimiko,” Nanako explained, having his undivided attention. “The king and queen would guide and protect the princesses, as you do for us. So, we’re the princesses, and you’re the queen.”

You beamed at the girls, their explanation ridding you of the self-consciousness they’d accidentally caused. Geto relaxed when he saw you smile, going back to admiring you.

“And I’m the king, I suppose,” Geto said with cockiness.

“Nope,” the girls echoed in unison, making his jaw drop. Nanako was the one to give a further explanation. “You’re the knight because you protect the royalty and slay the bad guys!”

So, they did know he’d slaughtered the village to free you all.

“Girls, you know the knights serve the royals, right? Geto is our equal.”

“Okay?” Nanako asked, looking at you blankly. “He serves us, too. Like when I told him I wanted pancakes the other day, he got them, like a good servant!”

She grinned as his jaw dropped. Both you and Mimiko giggled at the blonde’s words, and he turned to you with a pout.

“So, I’m a servant?”

“Hey, hey, some knights were lords in their own rights, and others went on to become kings, so you can be both,” you said, ever the diplomat.

“Sure,” Nanako agreed with a nod. “Izumi’s the queen, and you can be whatever you like, Geto.”

He sniffed. “I’d be the king, thank you.”

If he was the king, you’d be his queen, and he liked the sound of that.

“Okay,” the twins agreed before they began to whisper amongst themselves, losing interest in the conversation they started.

He rolled his eyes. Children.

******

“I thought the Star Globe Cult had already dismantled,” Geto hummed as he walked beside Shiu, you and the girls trailing behind.

The older man shook his head as he ushered you four through a well-hidden hallway, leading you all through a large building. The headquarters to a cult, you’d been told. Why Geto wanted you all to visit a cult, you had no clue, but you wouldn’t question his choice.

“It’s a different organization now, but it’s basically the same thing,” Shiu explained, before looking at Geto, his steps not faltering. “To the public, it looks like it’s just getting rebranded, but do you mind that?”

Geto chuckled and shook his head. “Nah, as long as I get to gather more money and curses.”

Your eyebrows rose at his response, but still, you stayed silent.

“Are you really going out looking like that?” Shiu asked, looking him up and down.

“Don’t we look good?” Geto countered, casting you and the twins a grin. “Appearances are important for stuff like this.”

Appearances were important, period. You thought back to the shop worker that’d looked at you with such judgment and wondered how she would react to you looking so lavish. You doubted she’d treat you so poorly, now.

“Are they all here?” Geto asked, refocusing on Shiu.

“The branch managers, directors, and president are all present, as well as the richest customers.”

“Perfect,” Geto said, before looking back at you, Nanako, and Mimiko. “I want you girls to watch closely, okay?”

“Okay,” the three of you chorused.

Your tone was hesitant. Mimiko was quiet as always, and Nanako showed her typical enthusiasm. The twins clearly trusted him enough not to doubt what was going on. They were smart girls, and after being abused for so long, they were adept at reading people. It’d been a necessary skill to learn, as saying the wrong thing to your captors when they were having a bad day resulted in a world of pain. Thus, you’d stop overthinking things, and trust the judgment of the children you called sisters.

Shiu stopped short of the double doors and nodded. “This is your stop.”

Geto nodded, his foxlike eyes glimmering. “Okay, see you in a few.”

With that, he threw the doors open. Immediately, all eyes were on you four, making you tense. You’d never seen so many people gathered, all to worship a single individual. Your family wasn’t a religious one, and Kuroki had denied you the option of exploring your spirituality, so the idea of revering a single, powerless human as a God was…strange to you.

The girls must’ve thought so, too because they clung tightly to you as Geto guided you all through the throngs of worshippers. In contrast to your hesitant movements, he strolled to the stage with a confidence that you couldn’t help but be in awe of. You halted in your steps, unsure if you should follow him. The girls stopped with you, and you decided that there was no need to be on stage with Geto.

“Watch and learn,” he whispered as he breezed past you, pecking your cheek without faltering.

Your cheeks began to flame, and you feared that your heart may beat out of your chest. You brushed your fingers over the area his lips contacted with, unable to believe what just happened. The corners of your mouth tugged upward, and Geto's little gesture of affection almost made you forget where you were.

Almost.

He approached a tall elderly man with slick-backed dark hair and a strange indent on his forehead. He was dressed like a regular person, and you hadn’t a clue what made him so worthy of admiration. Standing next to Geto made him look even more undeserving, the younger man putting him to shame without even trying.

A man, whom you assumed was a guard, tried to stop Geto. The result was a single punch sending him flying. A collective gasp sounded as he slumped to the ground, you and the girls stilling. Geto, meanwhile, looked as if he hadn’t just knocked a man out with one hit.

His power was simultaneously terrifying and impressive and nearly made you believe he himself was divine.

“Ah, ah, everyone, sorry to keep you all waiting,” Geto boomed as he approached the podium. A single look made the old man step aside. “Now, to be brief, starting right now, this entire organization belongs to me. We will also operate under a different name. Everyone, obey me and my family from now on.”

He waved in the direction of you and the girls, and you gulped at the increased attention. The girls clutched your hakama, using the swaths of cobalt blue fabric to hide from the eyes of the discontented worshipers. When they looked back at Geto, a flurry of shorts erupted. He just laughed.

“Well, this is a pickle,” he joked, before appearing to have an epiphany and looking to the elderly man. “I know, Sonoda, stand over there!” he ordered, pointing to the middle of the stage.

The older man agreed. Geto snapped his finger, and suddenly, a giant red nesting doll with a terrifying expression crushed the man. In an instant, he was crushed. Screams erupted from the crowd, but you were too shocked to make a sound. You knew he’d killed before but seeing it firsthand was completely different. Fortunately, the girls were shielded from the gory sight thanks to your Hakama.

“Now, once again,” Geto said, his tone no longer holding the cheerful timber it had moments ago. He sounded cold, and his eyes were detached as he swiped the blood away from his cheek. “You will obey me, you monkeys.”

Your brows furrowed at the insult. You knew monkeys technically were related to homo sapiens, but you didn’t know why Geto had called them that.

The onlookers stayed still, and you watched him closely. Geto released an annoyed sigh, then scanned over the crowd as if looking for his next victim. Before he could decide, the girls were forced to release you as you were yanked away by a burly man in a suit. You screeched as he pressed his chest to your back and wrapped an arm around your throat. The girls screamed, your shadow made its appearance as you thrashed in the man’s hold, and Geto’s expression became even stonier.

“You…you!” he struggled to get words out, even when he appointed an accusatory finger at Geto.

“Let her go,” Geto said calmly, descending the stage.

He took a step back, dragging you with him. A quick look around confirmed he was the only one taking a stand against Geto’s claim.

“I’ll snap her puny neck if you take a step closer,” he threatened as Geto neared.

Maybe, if you focused enough, your shadow could dispatch him. It’d killed before and even went toe-to-toe with Geto.

Geto laughed, but it lacked any humor. “You’re threatening her?”

“Ye-”

He didn’t finish his sentence. Instead, you fell to the floor as blood splattered on you. You were panting heavily, and a look back at your attacker informed you that his head had been replaced by a gruesome creature that was working on consuming his entire body. You shuddered, and in an instant, you were tackled by Nanako and Mimiko, who sobbed into your shirt. Slowly, as you processed what happened, you wrapped your arms around them. Geto appeared next to you, wrapping his arm around the three of you in a protective manner. He didn’t move away from you when he addressed the crowd again.

“Anyone who touches my family will meet the same fate,” he sneered, his hold tightening. “Now, bow down or die.”

Within a minute, the entire crowd had their foreheads to the ground, offering their submission to Geto. You leaned into his touch, his stronghold comforting, and his claim of you—his protection—reassuring. Never in your life had you had someone fending for you. Even your parents left you hanging, and the residence of Kuroki had tormented you for over a decade. When the girls came along, they gave you a reason to keep going, a second chance at sisterhood, and two beings to care for. Now, for the first time, you were the one being cared for. It felt good, to have someone to defend and provide for you. It was a foreign experience, but one that left you warm and fuzzy inside.

“Are you okay?” he whispered as the crowd bowed.

You nodded, rubbing the twins’ backs as they quietly cried. “I…yeah. I am.”

Something must’ve been wrong with you. You’d just seen him kill a man—two men—yet you were basking in his company and nuzzling into him.

He smiled down at you, his cordiality returning. “Good.”

But on second thought, maybe those men deserved it. Had the first not been a cult leader, and the second ready to kill you? They weren’t good men, and in all honesty, Geto had probably dealt the world a favor.

However, one thing was bothering you.

“Geto…why’d you call them monkeys?”

He blinked at you, appearing to be taken aback by the question. “Well…they aren’t special like us.”

“We’re special...” you trailed off, unable to supply the words.

“Because we have the sight,” he said for you. “We can see the world as it truly is.”

“The monsters?”

“The curses, yes,” he corrected, a large hand now stroking your hair. “They can’t see them, but they create them. However, they can’t even protect themselves from them, like monkeys.”

“But monkeys are cute,” you blurted before a blush crept up your neck.

He chuckled. “You think?”

You nodded. “Y-yeah. And they don’t hurt people just because. They aren’t…aren’t…” you again let your sentence die off, the word you were searching for evading you.

Luckily, Geto knew.

“They aren’t malicious, correct?”

You nodded. “Yeah. They’re better than them. Better than the villagers, than the men you k-killed.” You cringed at the stuttering, but saying the words was hard. However, it was the truth. “They just exist and try to survive.”

“You’re right,” he agreed, now twirling a strand of your hair around his finger. “They’re animals of some sort, but not monkeys.”

You nodded, and just as you opened your mouth to reply, Shiu made his reappearance. He faltered as he gazed upon the gore and cast Geto a questioning look. He just shrugged and refocused on you.

“Are you ready to go, Izumi, or do you need a minute?”

The girls’ sobs had died down to soft whimpers, and you were in desperate need of a shower. More than that, you wanted to leave this place behind, to get away from the danger these cultists presented. Only one had attacked, but who knew how many harbored violent intentions?

“I’m ready.”

He smiled, then aided you and the girls in standing. The body of your attacker had been entirely consumed by the curse, giving you the mercy of not having to look at his corpse.

“So…it went well?” Shiu asked as he escorted you all away.

He looked back for a moment, then cast a glance at you and nodded, a smile playing on his lips. “I’d say so.”

Chapter Text

You’d never seen a building so stunning. The temple that was built to house the Star Globe’s Cult higher-ups lived up to its name, as it was indeed grand. Located in Shizuoka, it was concealed by swaths of trees, including several cherry blossoms. Japan’s most iconic mountain was ever present, offering a gorgeous view.

“What do you think?” Geto hummed as he led you, Nanako, and Mimiko to the sleeping quarters.

The girls had run ahead of you two and were oohing and aahing at every little thing. When they’d passed by the windows peering into the gardens, they squealed in delight. You couldn’t blame them, as you gasped when you saw the lush grounds bursting with flora and a sizeable coy pond. You couldn’t wait to explore them.

“It’s amazing, Geto,” you breathed, looking around in awe.

You couldn’t believe the temple was where you were to be living. It was fit for royalty, and you had the privilege of calling it home. Even more mind-boggling were the ways the staff reacted to you, bowing each time they set eyes on you as if you truly were royalty.

“Suguru,” he said, making you look at him with wide eyes.

“What?”

“We’re close enough for you to call me by my given name, no?” he questioned, smiling at you. “Besides, I call you by yours.”

“Izumi isn’t my given name,” you muttered.

His eyebrows raised. “It isn’t?”

“No, it was given to me by…” you trailed off, emotions swarming you as you thought of the woman who gave you the name. You shook your head to clear yourself of those thoughts. “It doesn’t matter. I forgot my original name, anyway.”

Instead of clearing things up, your explanation only seemed to perplex him further.

“You forgot your name?” he repeated, sounding thoroughly baffled.

Your cheeks began to heat up, embarrassment swamping you that you’d forgotten such a fundamental part of yourself. If you were able to recall it, you’d resend the name that your tormentors called you. “It was foreign and hard to read and write in both kanji and kana and people rarely called me by it, and I didn’t like it, so—”

He held up a hand, ending your rambling. “It’s okay, Izumi, you don’t have to explain yourself. I was just…surprised,” he clarified, offering you his typical smile.

You forced yourself to return it, your heart fluttering. Seeing him wear the expression gave you a level of comfort, where it had once filled you with suspicion.

“Okay, here’s your room, girls,” Suguru announced, stopping in front of a shoji door.

He slid it open and stepped inside, gesturing for the three of you to join him. When you all did, a collective gasp was let out. It was incredibly spacious, bigger than the motels the four of you had spent far too long holed up in. A large fluffy white rug was in the center of the room, which was split up into two sections. On one half was a lofted seated area, with a designated playing area below it. A door was right next to it, presumably to a bathroom or closet. The other half was a sleeping area, with two beds parallel to each other. Instead of headboards, each bed had built-in bookshelves above them. The windows overlooked the gorgeous gardens and allowed ample sunlight to stream in.

“Your things have already been placed by the servants,” Suguru said, waving his hand to the playing area, which contained a massive dollhouse. “And some have been added.”

“This is…really ours?” Nanako breathed, looking around the room in awe.

Her eyes were shimmering, and she was practically bouncing with excitement. Mimiko was looking around with wide eyes, humming in approval at everything she came across.

Suguru nodded and ruffled the blonde’s hair. “Just for you two.”

That seemed to help the girls recover from their shock. They ran to the dollhouse, quickly picking toys to play with and tuning out you and Suguru.

He chuckled. “I guess that’s our cue to leave.”

You nodded in agreement, smiling as Nanako and Mimiko giggled amongst themselves. It warmed your heart to see them so happy. It was a dream come true to see the girls safe and content, and you’d do everything in your power to ensure their joy wasn’t taken away again.

“I hope my room is as nice,” you said as you followed Suguru, anticipation filling you.

It’d been years since you were granted a proper space of your own, and never had you had the opportunity to be housed in such a lavish structure.

“I have a feeling you’d like it,” he replied as he led you to another room.

The shoji was bigger, immediately making you think it was the main bedroom. Your brows furrowed. “This isn’t the master room?”

“It is,” he said as he slid the door open. “You’re staying in it, too.”

“What?” you squeaked, sharply inhaling when he placed his hand on the small of your back to lead you inside.

Your eyes widened. Instead of stepping into a bedroom, you stepped into a sitting area. Two couches faced each other with a coffee table in between them, right by a fireplace that housed a small TV. A wooden double door was centered on the back wall across from the fireplace, the thicker material leading you to believe it was a bathroom.

“It’s spilt up into two sleeping areas,” he explained, pointing to a small hallway with two shoji doors right across from each other. He pointed to the one on the right. “That one is yours.” He pointed to the double doors. “And that’s our bathroom.”

“Our?” you repeated, your mouth growing dry and your face growing hot.

Something about the situation seemed so intimate. It was one thing to live together, but to co-exist in the same room seemed like something that a couple would do, not friends. Like you were his woman—a title you wouldn’t mind—and not just his ward. But you kept your notions to yourself, not wanting to humiliate yourself by exposing your girlish fantasy. You knew it was silly to have such thoughts, and you didn’t want to make things awkward between the two of you.

“Yes, our, Izumi,” he said. He put his hand on the back of his neck, his expression turning sheepish. “I hope you don’t mind. I should’ve consulted with you first, but I figured since the master has two sleeping areas, we could share. But if it’s a problem—”

“No, it isn’t,” you quickly reassured, kicking yourself. You probably came across as ungrateful, and that’s the last thing you wanted. “It’s a good idea, I was just…shocked.” You shuffled to your door. “I, uh, am going to take a look.”

“Okay,” he said, following you and going to his door, right across from yours. “All your things had been placed, but if you need help finding anything, let me know.”

You nodded. “I will, thank you.”

“Of course. I want to help you in any way I can.”

His voice dropped an octave, doing nothing to help the heat that infested your face. Before you made a fool of yourself, you mumbled, “Okay,” and then hurried into the safety of your new room. You inhaled several deep breaths to compose yourself, trying your best to cleanse your mind of the thoughts that popped into them. When that didn’t work, you started to pace.

You were reading too much into his kindness. You knew that, but that didn’t stop your mind from conjuring a plethora of scenarios. Some were pure and featured typical things couples did, holding hands, feeding each one another, etc. Others…others only made you hotter.

For obvious reasons, you had little experience in the way of guys, and what you did have wasn’t the result of a consensual relationship. Yet, Kai’s carnality had taught you enough to understand the illicit activities a man and a woman could get up to, and simple ways to bring pleasure to a male body.

When Kai had instructed you to do such things, you felt disgusted. But you couldn’t help but imagine enacting the little you know on Suguru and seeing how he’d react.

Would he urge you on, and plead for more? Or would he assume control, directing you on what to do?

The idea simultaneously excited and embarrassed you, with a hint of shame present. It was wrong to think of him so lewdly and to wonder if he’d treat you gentler than Kai did.

The longer you dwelled in the depths of your mind, the more disgusted you became with yourself, the image of Kai floating around your head not helping. You couldn’t even appreciate your gorgeous bedroom—complete with a queen-sized bed, a built-in desk and bookcases next to a mirrored wardrobe, and a small dining table with a tea set—because you were too lost in your mind.

Often, Kai had been focused on his own release, but from time to time, he focused on you. And occasionally, it even felt good. It never failed to horrify you when you found enjoyment in what he did to you, just as it horrified you that you wanted Suguru to do some of the things Kai done had to you.

You knew Suguru wasn’t Kai, and that it was natural for humans to have certain urges. But Suguru had given no intention that he saw you as anything other than a friend, which made sense. In power and appearance, he seemed to be a god amongst mere mortals. To think he’d want you was laughable.

You huffed a breath, tears of frustration pricking your eyes. That only upset you further because that shouldn’t be something you’re crying about. It made you feel pathetic, which resulted in you feeling less worthy of someone like Suguru, more like a freak for wanting him.

Before you spiraled into a full breakdown, you forced yourself to still. Swiping at your eyes, you take in a breath. Then, you held it for seven seconds and slowly exhaled. You process the steps as you’d been taught, only stopping when you began to feel in control of yourself again.

You felt something for Suguru, something that wasn’t platonic, something that was a recipe for disaster and hurt. However, you wouldn’t—couldn’t—dwell on those emotions. Instead, you’d push them to the side, and go on as normal, as if you hadn’t developed a crush on the man who’d saved you from a hellish life.

Chapter Text

You spent the rest of the day looking at every nook and cranny of your new room, and before you knew it, the day had faded into dusk. It was bigger than any of the motel rooms you’d been holed up in and included several items that you weren’t in possession of prior to the move. Your favorite of these room-warming presents was the desk chair you were currently sitting—well, spinning—in, and a navy silk robe that hung on a wardrobe hook. It was the same color as Suguru’s Buddhist robes, and you couldn’t help but wonder if it was intentional.

Secretly and shamefully, you hoped it was. The hakama he selected for you had the same color scheme as his robes, only brighter. You weren’t bold enough to admit that you adored matching with him. To you, it was a visual representation of the bond you two shared, and that made you feel more connected to him.  

You couldn’t help but frown at the thought, spinning a little faster to temporarily rid your mind of Geto Suguru.

You knew you were reading too far into the situation, that your feelings for Suguru were making you imagine things that simply weren’t true.

But even being aware of this didn’t stop your feelings.

You liked Suguru, when you should want things to be completely platonic. Namely due to the homicidal tendencies you knew he had, and the fact that there was no chance he would see you in the same light.

He was simply too close to perfection to want you. More important, there were prettier girls out there, ones that had experience and weren’t so dependent on him.

The sun was now firmly below the horizon, and a glance at the clock revealed it to be the perfect time to shower. Perhaps, the hot water would help you clear your mind.

You stopped spinning in circles on the desk chair—or spinny chairs, as you preferred—to gather a change of clothes. An earlier perusal of the bathroom revealed an array of self-care products, including your beloved body wash. Now, there was a lotion of the same scent, something you were excited to slather your body in.

You grabbed the robe—just in case you were cold afterward—then headed to the bathroom.

Which a towel-clad Suguru was stepping out of, the thick white fabric wrapped around his waist the only thing covering his…intimate bits. His long dark hair was flowing freely, and still dripping wet. Some beads of water rolled down his chest, and you couldn’t help but track them.

Then, you noticed the giant ‘X’ shaped scare spanning across his muscular chest, and concern replaced the wantonness you’d been feeling. It appeared to be fully healed, but based on the size alone, you knew it must’ve hurt. Worse, the unnaturally alphabetical shape hinted that it wasn’t caused accidentally.

“What happened?” you blurted without thinking.

Your heart ached at the thought of Suguru going through something brutal enough to earn such a horrific scar. It didn’t take away from his handsomeness—quite the opposite—but you knew the pain must’ve been hellish.

“Oh, this?” he said, thumbing at the top of the scar, your eyes unable to look away as he did so. “I lost a fight.”

He said the words so causally that you nearly missed the frown tugging at his lips and the way one of his eyes twitched. You suspected there was more to the story. A simple fight wouldn’t result in such a mark. But it was clear he didn’t want to share, so you wouldn’t pry further.

“I’m sorry.”

He cocked a brow. “For?”

“Just…I’m sorry you went through that,” you explained quietly. “It looks like it hurt.”

You knew whoever did it was a vile individual, and you prayed that they paid for their crimes. Hopefully, they suffered while justice was brought to them.

He chuckled. “You aren’t wrong about that.” His lips twitched into a smirk. “Notice anything else?”

It took you longer than it should’ve to realize what he meant, but when it registered that he was referring to your staring, your face flamed. You quickly averted your eyes, looking at everything but him.

“Uh…no,” you stammered, trying to cover your shame with a giggle. It came out too shaky to come from genuine amusement, betraying your true emotions. “I didn’t.”

You tried to stand straighter, to school your face, and act like everything was normal. Still, you kicked yourself for your social ineptness, and something in your gut made you believe you were failing miserably at your goal. You were prone to embarrassment, and your lack of experience made you an awkward individual, resulting in mimicking what’s typically deemed normal a monumental task.

“Really, Izumi?” he questioned, his tone teasing and amused.

At least he didn’t mind seem to mind your impoliteness. In fact, he found some humor in it. Yet, knowing this didn’t stop you from longing for the floor to swallow you up.

“Really, I didn’t,” you rushed out.

You relished talking with Suguru, but you’d wished that you’d minded your business and never asked about his scar.

“I, uh, am just going to go take a shower,” you said, then instantly cringed.

You were heading to the bathroom with a change of clothes; what the hell else would you be doing?

“Yeah?” he hummed, pushing his hair back. “The shower is amazing.”

The little gesture only made you more flustered. Before, you’d been too clouded by fear and mistrust to notice just how attractive Suguru was, to truly appreciate his kindness. But as your trust in him built, your immunity to his good looks began to fade, and your suspicion turned to admiration.

And that was a recipe for disaster. Worse, knowing that things were bound to go south didn’t change your feelings one bit.

******

You huffed out an irritated breath as you struggled to sleep, tossing and turning. A peek at the digital bedside clock revealed it to be well past midnight, but your body refused to let you slumber. The bed—the room—just felt too big. The motels you’d been in had smaller, more uncomfortable beds, and were shared with three other people. Prior to Geto’s rescue, you only had a twin-sized cot to sleep on, which you shared with Mimiko and Nanako.

You wondered if they were having an easier time adjusting to their room, seeing as they still had another person to share it with. 

Footsteps approached your room. You stilled, then sat up, your eyes glued to the door. The rice paper of the shoji revealed a tall, muscular figure, one that’d have you on edge if it wasn’t for the outline of long, flowing hair.

Immediately, you knew it was Geto, easing any fears.

The doors slide open, confirming what you already knew. He stepped into your room, pausing when he saw you awake. “You’re awake.”

You nodded. “So are you.” Your brows furrowed. “Uh, did you need anything?”

He stepped toward the bed, his lips twitching into a smile. “You.”

“What?” you squeaked; unsure you heard him correctly.

Surely, your sleep-deprived mind was playing tricks on you, misinterpreting Geto’s words. Certainly, he wouldn’t be so brazen to creep into your room in the middle of the night just for your company.

He tugged at the hem of his black T-shirt and yanked it off, leaving him only in grey sweatpants. He continued to advance toward the bed. “I need you, Izumi.”

“Wha—”

Your words were cut off by a gasp, elicited by Geto crawling onto the bed. His large hands grasped your thighs, parting them as he stationed his body between them. He brushed his thumb over your lips.

“Can I kiss you?”

At his question, your eyes became the size of saucers, the ability to breathe deserting you.

He smirked at you, your reaction not going unnoticed by him. “Cat got your tongue, Angel?”

You opened your mouth, then shut it, unable to formulate a proper sentence. So, instead of talking, you just nodded.

Geto chuckled as he took hold of your chin and tilted your face in his direction, then pressed his mouth to yours. He placed his lower lip between yours to keep you two locked together, and hesitantly, you wrapped your arms around his neck. Based on his sigh, it was the right move. You paid close attention to how he responded. The result was you being unable to enjoy the feel of Geto’s lips against yours, too lost in trying to make sure you don’t mess up. Your thoughts prevented you from relaxing, something he picked up on.

With a sigh, he pulled back. “Do you not want this, Izumi? I don’t want to force—”

Your eyes widen, and you frantically shake your head. “No, no, I do. I just…don’t know what I’m doing.”

Though you were kicking yourself for giving him the wrong idea, your heart fluttered at the fact he’d check on you because he sensed your discomfort. You’d only ever kissed one other person, one who had no regard for your agency or consent.

But Geto wasn’t him. He was bounds better than your tormentor, and it was an insult to even compare the two.

“Stop stressing,” Geto murmured, leaning close again. “I’ll teach you, just relax for me.”

He brushed his lips over yours, before quickly deepening the kiss. This time, you allowed your eyes to flutter shut and forced yourself to relax, trying to mimic the way his lips moved against yours. He hummed in approval when you sucked on his bottom lip, so you did it again, relishing the moan he let out. Your worries from earlier started to fade away, and you became lost in the moment.

But so lost you became, that you accidentally bite him, a metallic taste hitting your tongue.

An indescribable sound of distress left your throat, and you pulled away. “I’m sorry!”

He lifted a thumb and swiped at his bloody bottom lip, then sucked his dirtied thumb clean. You watched the action with intense interest, nearly forgetting about what you did wrong until you noticed a small trickle of blood.

That snapped you out of your stupor.

“Oh my gosh, Geto, I’m so sorry!” you rushed out, reaching for the box of tissues on your nightstand. “I didn’t mean—"

“Suguru,” he said, accepting the outstretched tissue. “I told you earlier to call me Suguru.”

You blinked at him, then nodded. “Yeah, Suguru, I didn’t mean to bite you. I just—”

His chuckle cut you off. “Don’t worry, Izumi, stuff like that happens. Besides,” he said, his voice dropping an octave. He slid the straps of your white tank top down, then pushed at the garment until your breasts sprung free. “I didn’t mind. I like it a little rough.”

You shivered as the frigid air in your bedroom froze your nipples, but your exposed state and his words had your face hot. When Geto started to thumb one of the stiff buds, you gasped.

“Do it again,” he whispered, before reclaiming your mouth as he rolled your nipples around.

You obliged, nibbling on his bottom lips as he groped your breasts. You moaned at the sensation, leaning into his touch as your core began to ache.

“Touch me,” you mumbled against his lips, your boldness taking you both aback.

He pulled away and cocked a brow, tugging at your nipples. “Aren’t I already?”

You pursed your lips. “I don’t mean there…” you trailed off, your blush intensifying as you struggled to put your desires into words.

“Oh?” he hummed, before planting a hand between your thighs. “You mean here?”

You whimpered when he began to stroke you over the fabric of your grey boyshorts, electricity shooting through you at the stimulation.

“Answer, angel,” he encouraged, the way he was using his hands making your mind feel fuzzy.

“Y-yeah,” you stammered, moaning when he started to draw circles over your clit.

“Yeah?” he repeated, shoving your underwear aside for easier access. Then, he resumed, the lack of a barrier making his motions feel even more pleasurable. “You like me touching you like this?”

“I do,” you confessed, your voice breathier than you’re used to.

“How about this?” he questioned, dipping his index and middle finger inside of you. “You like this, too?”

“Yes!” you cried when he started to curl them.

One hand continued to play with your breast, while the other played with your wet heat. The combination resulted in tension quickly building in your core.

“How’s it feel?” he inquired.

Even if you weren’t looking at him, you would’ve known he was smirking, the satisfaction in his voice clear.

“Feels so good, Geto,” you moaned out, grinding against his hand.

A gasp was torn from you when he delivered a sharp slap to the tops of your thigh, before massaging the area of impact. “What’d I tell you to call me?”

You froze, your lust-hazed brain struggling to remember. He slowed his fingers, and you whined.

He chuckled. “Needy girl.”

You rolled your hips, urging him to move faster. In response, he stopped completely, and a cry of protest left you, your lips forming into a pout.

He tsked. “Quiet down, angel. I’ll continue when you answer my question.

Oh, right, his name.

“Uh, Suguru,” you breathed, almost cheering when his hand resumed.

“Yes, that’s right!” he praised. He added his thumb into the mix, using it to rub your clit. “Such a good girl.”

Your mind went blank at the sensation and had you possessed less self-control, you would’ve been drooling.

“You know, good girls deserve rewards,” he hummed, his words hardly registering as you felt your release neared. “I think you should get to come, sweetheart.” He leaned down, his mouth hoovering by your ear. “Come for me, Izumi.”

******

You awakened with a moan. Your entire body felt hot and sweaty, and it trembled violently. You were faintly aware of the dampness now present in your boyshorts, the reason for it clear. Pleasure pulsed through you, and you felt yourself clenching around nothing.

Then, your lustful haze began to lift, and mortification raced through you as you realized what just happened.

You had a wet dream about Suguru, one intense enough to pull an orgasm from you. Never had such a phenomenon occurred, as you’d never desired anyone enough for them to infiltrate your dreams to satisfy your need for them.

You knew it was natural for humans to yearn to be physical with one another, but you couldn’t help but feel guilty over the dream that your mind had created. Yes, it wasn’t something you could control, nor did Suguru ever have to know about it, but it just felt so perverted.

It didn’t help that your panties were absolutely soaked, to the point that they would need to be changed.

The shoji suddenly slid open, and you yelped, before a string of gibberish left you when you saw Suguru. Your heart raced at the sight of him, and it didn’t help that he was wearing a black T-shirt and grey sweatpants.

He glanced at you, his eyes filled with concern. “Are you okay? I heard something.”

Does the universe hate you? This situation was minor compared to all you’d been through, but it was certainly one you didn’t want to be in.

“I…uhm…nightmare,” you stuttered, throwing the covers aside and standing from the bed. “I had a nightmare.”

You couldn’t be in your room right now. Even if you just roamed the hallways like a specter, you needed to be somewhere else right now, a place Suguru wasn’t so close to.

His eyes raked over your form, and something in his gaze put you on edge. It was as if he knew you were lying to him. Thankfully, he didn’t call your bluff, instead just nodding.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he questioned quietly, his eyes not straying from yours.

You shook your head, your face feeling like it was on fire. “Uh, no…I’d rather not.” You stood from the bed and grabbed the robe that hung up, quickly putting it on. “I’m just…gonna go get some tea. Help soothe my nerves.”

“Would you like some company?” he offered, stepping aside as you exited your room.

Yes, but Suguru was the last person you needed to be around right now. His presence, though enjoyable, wouldn’t be calming right now. The worst-case scenario, it’d result in you embarrassing yourself and destroying his image of you. Right now, he saw you as his ward, a damsel in distress. But if you made too many blunders, he may start to see you as everyone else in your life had, a freak and a nuisance.

Of course, the worst-case scenario was the one that kept flickering through your mind.

“No, no, you can go back to bed.”

Maybe it was your imagination, but you swore you saw his face fall. Yet that couldn’t be right, so it must’ve been your sleep deprivation getting to your brain.

“All right…I’ll see you in the morning,” he said, a twinge of guilt going through you at the disappointment in his voice.

You thought about going back on what you said and inviting him to join you for a cup of tea, but you ultimately thought better of it. You’re sure he was just checking on you to be nice, and moreover, you didn’t want any attention he’d show you to inspire another wet dream.

When it was a guarantee that Suguru was back in bed, you crept back to your bedroom. You didn’t check to verify that the door slid close, because the moment you stepped foot into your room, you B-lined to your dresser and pulled out an unsullied pair of black panties. You quickly yanked the ruined ones off—cringing at the dampened cotton lining—and tossed them in the hamper stationed by the wardrobe. You sighed in irritation when the boyshorts landed a few inches away from the hamper, but just made a mental note to pick them up later as you tugged the fresh pair on.

Once that problem was taken care of, you crept out of your room to go fix your tea, unaware of the slightly agape door that Suguru was peering through.

******

As you neared the kitchen, familiar giggles floated to your ears. Your brows furrowed when you set sight on Nanako and Mimiko, their backs to you as they dug into a bag of chocolate chips. They were blissfully unaware of your presence as they sat on barstools to devour the sweets stored away on the island counter, not aware that they’d been caught creeping around and stealing sweets way past their bedtime.

Although, you couldn’t really talk since you were doing the same thing.

“What are you two doing up?” you questioned, retrieving the kettle on the stove, and filling it up with water.

They squealed at the sound of your voice, whirling around with wide eyes.

You giggled at their expressions. “I won’t tell on you, don’t worry.”

Not that they had to answer to anyone besides you or Suguru, and though they had a set bedtime now, they wouldn’t get in trouble for nighttime tryst. Just like them, you were still adjusting to your new life and surroundings, so it would be unfair of you to punish them.

Mimiko frowned. “Why are you up?”

“Don’t change the subject,” you chided as you retrieved a green tea bag.

Nanako shrugged, continuing to eat now that she knows that she won’t get in trouble. “We couldn’t sleep and got hungry.”

“Now answer,” Mimiko demanded.

You cocked a brow at her tone, then scoffed a laugh and obliged with the request. “Suguru woke me up from a nightmare.”

“Oh,” she murmured, her expression turning sheepish. “Was it really bad?”

Not at all.

“Uhm…I’ve had worse,” you answered, deciding to go with a somewhat true answer.

“That a dumb question, Mimi,” Nanako mocked, throwing a chocolate chip at her forehead. “She just said it was a nightmare.”

You grabbed the bag away from her, giving her a disapproving look. “Apologize, Nanako.”

“But it was a dumb question,” she huffed, pouting when you didn’t relent. “Fine!” She transferred her attention back to her twin. “I’m sorry.”

Mimiko nodded in acknowledgment, too focused on the bag of chocolate chips you held to really care. “Can we have those back?”

The kettle began to whistle before you could answer. So, you just handed it back to them and prepared your tea. Once it was flavored to your liking, you took a seat next to Mimiko, stealing a chocolate chip from the bag. You smiled at them when they whipped their heads in your direction, then washed the candy down with a sip of your tea.

“It’s been too long since I’ve had chocolate,” you hummed as you took some more, savoring the rich, sweet taste.

The dessert had always been a favorite of yours, and during rare times your parents felt generous, they’d buy some for you. That was well over a decade ago, and the villagers of Kuroki weren’t kind enough to let you indulge in the treat.

The girls looked at each other and nodded, communicating with each other without uttering a single word. Nanako reached over and tore off some paper towels, then handed them to Mimiko. The brunette sat them in front of you, then poured an absurd amount of chocolate chips in front of you, nearly emptying the bag.

“There, now you can have as much as you want!” Nanako declared, smiling triumphantly.

The pride on their faces made your heart melt, and they watched you eagerly as you started to dig in. You gave them a thumbs up, earning two bright beams. The girls’ happy hums were the only sound as you all devoured the chocolate. It contrasted—dare you say conflicted—with the herbal taste of your green tea, enhanced with the sourness of a lemon. Your tastebuds were on the fence if they liked the combo, but you kept washing the candy down the hot liquid regardless.

“Hey, Izumi?” Nanako questioned when the chocolate was essentially gone. “Is Geto trustworthy now?”

You froze, the cup halfway to your lip. “You don’t think he is?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know, you said…”

“That he wasn’t trustworthy when we first met.” Mimiko finished for her sister.

Nanako nodded. “Yeah.”

At the time, he hadn’t been. But he’d shown multiple times that he meant none of you harm and often went out of the way to protect you all. Most importantly, when he had a chance to ditch you all when he assumed control of the Star Globe’s Cult, leaving you all in Nagoya or Tokyo while he relocated to Shizuoka. Yes, it was obvious that he had some flaws and violent tendencies, but it was just as obvious that he was someone that you could place your faith in.

“I…I didn’t know him then,” you said, setting the cup on the island. “But now I, we, do.” They looked at you expectantly, eagerly awaiting your verdict. Finally, you nodded. “Yes. We can trust Suguru. He’s…good.”

It seemed obvious to you that Suguru could be trusted, that he was a good guy a step away from protection. However, it would be pretty messed up for you to think otherwise, considering you’d become depraved enough to fantasize about the man.

Chapter Text

The moment Suguru heard the door to the sleeping quarters click shut, he slid his shoji open wider. He counted to sixty, just to make sure you wouldn’t return and catch him in a…compromising position. Once it was a guarantee you wouldn’t return anytime soon, he slinked into your room and snagged the grey boyshorts that’d been thrown to the floor.

He grinned as his hands touched his prize, his cock twitching at the evidence of your arousal. He knew you’d been lying about having a nightmare. The soft moans that drifted to his room sounded too wanton, and the lustful, hazy expression that you’d worn only confirmed that your dream was erotic in nature.

And when he witnessed you changing your panties, miserably failing at being sneaky, he decided he’d have some fun of his own. A part of him was curious about what’d triggered the dream, but he didn’t want to consider the slim possibility that it was anyone other than him that had you so riled up.

The panties secured, Suguru hurried back to his room and closed the door. Years of training had made him quick and silent, resulting in him being in and out of your room within seconds.

Unlike you, he confirmed the door was shut before he laid down in his king-sized bed—which felt too big for just himself—and tugged his sweatpants down, thankful he slept commando. He spit on his hand, then thumbed at his slit, gathering the beads of precum leaking from his tip. He spread the natural lubrication around his hard cock, his dick jumping at the contact. He closed his eyes as he thrust into his fist, imagining he was rutting into your pussy instead of his palm.

He tried to avoid entrapping his cock in a death grip, but tonight, he couldn’t help but squeeze his length tighter than usual. He was lost in the fantasy that your wet cunt was wrapped around him, that he barely registered the pain. The sounds he heard you make replayed in his head, only adding fuel to the fire.

Would you sound like that when Suguru finally got his hands on you? Maybe you’d be shy and try to silence yourself, but he wouldn’t allow it. He’d want to hear every noise you made, to take pride in how good he made you feel. Perhaps you’d be on the opposite end of the spectrum, and your lack of experience would make you hypersensitive, making you whine and gasp each time he touched you.

Either way, he’d make sure you were as desperate for him as he was for you. He might even steal your orgasms as payback for the spell you put him under, only relenting when you were a begging, crying mess.

He grasped your panties tighter as his core began to tremble, the lingering dampness of your juices only pushing him closer to the edge. Unable to help himself, he brought the fabric to his nose, his mouth watering at your natural scent.

Suguru would bet everything he had that your taste would put your sweet smell to shame. His mouth watered at the thought of plunging his tongue into your pussy, a task he’d do daily once he claimed you. You were a virgin—he was sure of it—so he’d have to prep you before you could take his cock, and he’d happily use his mouth to get the job done.

The thought of being the first to taste you, of tainting your innocence, is what tipped him over the edge. With a deep moan—one loud enough to make him happy you were out of the quarters—ropes of cum spewed out of his cock, panting his hand and lower abdominal white.

He huffed out a laugh as his chest heaved, his mind slightly hazy. He looked at the grey cotton in reverence, the material that held hints of you having granted him the best orgasm he’d had in over a year.

******

Shizuoka, a city that has hundreds of thousands of residents tucked away on Japan’s south coast. It boasts some iconic features, such as Mt. Fuji, and the Izu Peninsula, which has many onsen hot springs and gorgeous views of the sea. The onsens are believed to have rejuvenating properties, and Japan’s most famous mountain has long been a site of reverence for practitioners of both Shintoism and Buddhism.

It's only natural that a city close to such a spiritual area would be the location of Suguru’s new grand temple.

Well, technically, it had belonged to the cultist who he’d slaughtered. But their leaders were dead—as were those who didn’t bow to him—leaving him the only one to claim it. He liked it that way, because would there be anyone who challenged him, they’d have to die. And it’s incredibly hard to be a family man when you’re always killing people. Not that you or the girls minded his murderous tendencies. It turned him on beyond belief that you didn’t care about his homicidal behavior, but he’d rather keep it to a minimum in your presence.

He didn’t want to scare you off, after all.

“Kitty!” Nanako exclaimed, taking off down the hall to chase one of the temple cats.

The grand temple housed a number of cats. Not only are the creatures a traditional symbol of life and fortune but they’re said to have protective powers, likely due to their ability to detect curses. And they keep pests at a minimum, which Geto suspected was the primary reason so many felines roamed. He didn’t really care why there were so many cats around, though, since he was a big fan of the furry creatures.

“Nanako!” you exclaimed when the tuxedo cat hissed at her, the girl’s aggressive approach making the animal feel threatened. “That’s enough.”

She pouted. “Bu—”

“No buts,” you said firmly. “It doesn’t want to be bothered.”

Suguru’s lips quirked into a smile as he discreetly observed the scene. He liked seeing your assertiveness, and how comfortable you were assuming an authoritarian role when the situation called for it. It was a trait necessary to be at his side, and how good you were with children made him confident that you’d be a great mother to the ones he’d put in you.

An image of you with a round, pregnant belly popped into his mind. He swallowed coarsely, thankful for the looseness of his robes. After this, he might have to consult with the boyshorts he’d stolen last night.

“Suguru, we’re going to the gardens,” you informed him when you took note of his presence. As usual, the girls were at your side. “Care to join us?”

You'd been spending a lot of time in the gardens since you arrived a week and a half ago, often sitting by the koi pond with your sketch pad, watching the girls run around. It was a scene that always made his heart skip a beat. He wouldn't turn down the chance to see his new lifelines carefree and happy, a visual representation of the future he wished to construct.

After the years of suffering you endured at the hands of those monkeys, the new life of leisure he’d provided you all with was well deserved.

He nodded and smiled at you three. “I’d love to.”

He'd managed to establish a connection with you three after months of feeling completely alone in this world. Somewhere along the way, you all went from being poor souls he had no choice but to help—and someone he found very attractive, your case—to people who motivated him to forge forward with his goals. He’d been fortunate enough to discover a new family in you, Nanako, and Mimiko after leaving his previous one at Jujutsu High.

“Okay, lead the way,” you said, your tone more chipper than usual.

If he wasn’t looking at you so closely, he’d missed the way that you perked up at his agreement, your eyes growing a tad bit brighter.

That was an interesting development, one that he was incredibly happy to see.

“How was it?” you asked, quickening your pace to keep up with his longer strides.

He slowed down so you could easily stroll next to him. “The meeting was fine. Boring.”

Unfortunately. When he was meeting with the cult’s investors earlier in the day, he was hoping that one of them would give him a reason to show his might, an excuse to rid the world of more monkeys. However, his first display of power seemed to be enough to keep them in line, robbing him of a reason to spill blood.

Of course, he could’ve still killed one of them for fun, but mindless acts of violence don’t inspire the most loyalty.

“I thought it’d last longer,” you said, frowning when Nanako ran ahead to chase another cat, this one fluffy and orange.

Never far away from her twin, Mimiko soon joined the chase, leaving you two in the dust.

“Meet you in the garden!” Nanako threw out before she disappeared around a corner.

“Gir—”

“Let them be, Izumi,” Suguru said, interrupting your chiding. Alone time with you was few and far between, due to the two little girls you’d claimed as your sisters. “They’ll be fine. The staff won’t let anything happen to them, and the temple is safe.”

He made it very clear to his servants that should it call for it, they’d lay their lives on the lines for you all. If they didn’t, he’d ensure their heads would be displayed on pikes, and take out a relative or two for vengeance.

“I’m happy the meeting didn’t last long,” he hummed, revisiting the conversation you two had been having. “It means I can spend more time with you all.”

A blush reddened your cheeks. “Yeah…me too.”

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, and it wasn’t too much longer before you arrived at the gardens. The wooden floors transitioned into pebbled pathways, and a sweet floral scent danced in the air. Sakura trees decorated the garden, providing bright pops of color. The gentle sound of flowing water echoed throughout the grounds. The large koi pond in the middle of the gardens how a wooden bridge traversing it, allowing the colorful koi fish that gracefully swam beneath the delicate water lilies to be seen up close.

“It’s so pretty out here,” you said, looking around in wonder as if it was your first time seeing it. Yet, considering you’d been deprived of nature for a decade, your fascination with the gardens made sense. “I love it.”

He followed you as you walked to a bench under one of the trees, a pep in your step. “You’re free to spend as much time out here as you like.”

“I plan to. And the girls like to look at the fish,” you revealed, your lips twitching into a smile. “They’ve even started to name them…I’m happy they're adjusting.”

He was, too. But he didn’t want to focus on the twins right now, as he was more interested in you.

“And what do you like to do out here?”

He knew the answer already. Cameras were strewn throughout the temple, and as his new duties didn’t allow him to spend as much time as he’d like around you, he often employed them to keep track of you.

But you spent most of your time in the gardens when he wasn’t present, so he had to save face.

“I draw. I like to capture the gardens from different angles, at different times. It’s too beautiful not to.”

He couldn’t help but smile at the contentment in your voice and admire how at ease you looked. It was a far cry from the state he’d found you in, and he was pleased with the progress you’d made.

“I’d love to see the drawings,” he declared, finally taking a seat next to you.

“I’ll show them to you later,” you said before the blush he loved so much made its return. “And uhm…thank you.”

He knew why you were showing him gratitude. Without him, you’d still be wasting away in a cage, left at the mercy of sadistic monkeys. Yet, he couldn’t come out and say that; that might put you off. No, he had to play dumb.

So, instead of accepting your acknowledgment immediately, he cocked a brow and asked, “For?”

“I…without you…” you trailed off as you became lost in thought before you take in a breath. “Without you, we’d still be in Kuroki, and that place…it wasn’t good. I never want to go back there again, and because you saved us, I don’t have to.”

Satisfaction swarmed him at your words. Knowing how you were treated infuriated him, yes, but knowing that most of your tormentors lay dead made him feel exceptionally proud of himself. He’d done you—and the world—a favor by getting rid of those monkeys.

“I’m happy I did it,” he said, referring to your rescue and the slaughter that lead up to it. “You all are my family now.”

Much to his chagrin, his words made your expression drop. He’d expected bashfulness or glee at his words, not…oh. You thought he didn’t return his feelings. How naïve of you to think so. But perhaps, he should be happy about how simple you could be. If you weren’t, you might’ve questioned him more and taken note of things he’d rather you ignore.

Case and point, the pair of grey underwear that went mysteriously missing.

He was eager to continue this conversation, but before he could, the girls came bursting through the doors, chasing after two cats. The felines split in opposite directions, so the twins followed suit. You stood from the bench, frowning as they scurried after the furry creatures.

“Girls, leave them alone!” you shrieked as Nanako tried to stop her cat by grabbing its tail.

The poor animal yawled in pain, and Nanako instantly released it.

“I’m sorry!” she rushed out as you approached. “I didn’t think.”

“Nanako, you have to leave the cats alone!” you reiterated your earlier talking point, which the girl had ignored. “They don’t want to be bothered, and you can get scratched.”

She seemed to be considering your words until Mimiko appeared with her cat snuggled into her chest. The lesson you’re trying to teach forgotten, Nanako squealed and hurried to her sister, instantly attacking the feline she held with hugs and kisses, earning her another scolding.

Something about the scene was endearing. However, he wanted to spend time with you, and the interruption had planted a single thought in his mind.

He needed to get the girls a nanny.

Chapter Text

Knowing when you’re being watched is an integral skill in the field of sorcery. Your senses must be honed, and your gut should always be trusted. Failing to do so can result in death, as it had for many of Suguru’s comrades. A pang went through his heart at the thought of those he lost, but he pushed it aside as he continued to stretch in preparation for a workout.

He had nothing to do today, so he decided to take advantage of his free time and train. He had to stay on top of his A-game, as slipping can be a death sentence. And since it was a lovely day out, he opted to exercise in the gardens. So, he tied up his hair, slipped on a presentable pair of sweatpants, then headed to the most serene spot on the temple’s grounds. You happened to be lounging in your favorite spot as the twins ran around, and he gave himself a pat on the back that he chose to forgo a shirt. While the girls played a game of tag and he trained, you sat in the shade and drew. Based on the frequent looks you stole, he suspected he was the subject of your drawing. You were trying to be discreet with your staring, but unfortunately for you, he felt your eyes on him.

“Care to join?” he called when he intentionally caught you staring as he rose from a standing fold.

Naughty little thing, gawking at his bare back like that.

You flushed at being caught and quickly shook your head. He bit back a smirk, the sight of your adorable rosy tint satisfying him. It was endearing how bad you were at hiding your attraction to him. He couldn’t pinpoint when it started exactly, but ever since the move to the temple, it had become increasingly obvious. He wondered how long it’d be until you gained the courage to confess. Most likely, he’d have to make the first move, but a guy could dream.

“N-no, I’m fine with just drawing,” you stammered.

He offered you a smile. “What are you drawing?” Your blush only deepened, making his grin widen. “Izumi, am I the subject?” he asked in faux shock, gasping dramatically. He placed a hand over his heart. “I’m honored!”

If he wasn’t a wanted criminal, he’d give Satoru an apology for how he disparaged his antics, because teasing someone can be quite fun. He wouldn’t allow anyone else to do so, of course, but it was becoming one of his favorite activities.

Deciding to up the ante, he straightened and widened his stance, then intentionally flexed his muscles.

Suguru wasn’t stupid. He knew he was handsome and was proud of how his body looked. It was the result of years of hard work and made him popular among the fairer sex. Luckily, you were no exception. A squeak left you, and though you grew more embarrassed, you didn’t take your eyes off him.

“How do you want me, Izumi?” he purred, making his tone more seductive than necessary. He spun in a circle, extending his arms so you can get a perfect view of his shirtless body. “Which angle do I look best in, sweetheart?”

The moment the pet name left him, you shot up and gathered your drawing supplies. Suguru’s brows furrowed, and he feared he pushed you too far. He figured if you could handle seeing him in a state of undress, a nickname would be nothing. Clearly, he was wrong.

“Uhm, watch the girls please, I need…to finish my drawing alone…yeah,” you murmured, your words a blatant excuse.

Letting his arms drop, he cocked a brow as he watched you hurry away, a chuckle leaving him when an alternate, less innocent reason for your hasty escape came to mind. Once your form was out of sight, he resumed his training, though his sweatpants felt a little less loose at the thought of what you may be doing.

******

You’d never felt lust before Suguru. While you’d had the pleasure—or displeasure, considering the circumstances it was dealt to you—of experiencing an orgasm once or twice, you’d never actively craved release. No, the rare times you had achieved climax always filled you with shame, because how could you find enjoyment in torment? Now, though, you spent an embarrassing amount of time yearning for the ache between your legs to cease. All because Suguru was stupidly attractive and had the nerve to be kind on top of that. The universe must’ve hated you, putting someone so perfect in your path, knowing you can never have them.

You were pathetic, wanting someone you were so unworthy of, someone…so above you. On top of being kind and handsome, he knew how to handle himself just fine, and could protect those around him. In every area you thought of, he was miles better than you. So, how could you have the nerve to want him so badly?

And how could you have stooped so low, that you’d snuck into his room, just to relieve the problem he’d created?

After seeing him flaunt the perfect body that you’d never be able to touch, him calling you sweetheart was the final straw, the term of endearment unleashing something inside you. You no longer could contain yourself, as you grew desperate for the throbbing of your cunt to stop.

The moment you reached your shared quarters, you dumped your drawing supplies onto your desk, then ran to his room to bury your face into his pillow. Yes, you should’ve been touching yourself in your bed instead of his, but your bed lacked his scent. If you’d be cursed to never feel his hands on your body, you could at least indulge a little and inhale his smell, an aroma you loved dearly.

It was wrong and perverted, you knew this, and you hated yourself for doing it. Yet, you couldn’t help yourself. And as you began to draw circles over your clit, your shame began to dull. You allowed your eyes to flutter close, trying to imagine your softer, smaller hands were Suguru’s. They were bigger and rougher and would provide additional friction that you simply couldn’t achieve.

How to work your body was one of the few things taught to you in Kuroki. The events leading up to these lessons were horrifying, but they were coming in handy now.

As you played with your swollen clit, the image of a shirtless Suguru contorting his body came to mind. You whimpered at the memory and began rutting against the bed for additional stimulation. You were thankful you chose to wear a simple lounge dress instead of one of the many hakama Suguru had designed for you, as the attire wouldn’t have provided such easy access.

Hesitantly, you slip your hand lower, allowing your fingers to trail along your slit. A breathy moan left you when you slipped one in, quickly followed by another. You made sure to be slow and careful, as you were very familiar with the dangers of being rough in such a sensitive location.

You slipped your other hand between your legs and used your thumb to provide attention to your clit. A cry left you when you curled your fingers inside yourself, whilst somehow keeping your thumb’s pace steady. Both of your hands were coated in your juices by now, but you couldn’t care.

As tension built in your core, you delved deeper into the fantasy. You arched your back and pressed your face further into the mattress. You imagined that Suguru was behind you, playing with your most intimate area, teasing you as he so often does, calling you a sweetheart or his angel, praising you for every noise you make.

You thought back to the dream you had of him and couldn’t help but wonder how accurate it was. You hoped it was close to his real-life performance, that he’d be bold, attentive, and talk you through the entire process. Maybe he’d hold your hand as he pounded into you, claiming what no one else ever had.

That was the thought that had the coil unraveling, your body trembling violently at the thought of Suguru taking you, making you his in the best way possible. Moans left you, and though you were alone in the quarters, you bit down on his pillow to silence yourself.

As you came down from your high, your shame returned when you realized what just happened.

Invading Suguru’s personal space was a betrayal of his trust alone, but masturbating on his bed? Tainting it with your essence? That was a whole different level entirely, one that had you looking at your slick-covered hands in horror. That feeling only worsened when you realized the extent of the mess you created, as his grey bedspread now had a visible wet spot where your cunt had been.

Panic and disgust interwove. Panic, because how’d you explain yourself if you got caught? And disgust, because how could you do something so perverted? Wasn’t this kind of depravity what caused you so much harm?

You struggled to remain calm as you roamed your mind for solutions, trying your best to take deep breaths before you had a full-blown panic attack. You decided your first move should be going to the bathroom and cleaning yourself up. Then, you dampened a towel to gently dab at the stain you’d created. If nothing else, it would dull the telltale smell of a woman’s arousal. Once that was done, you rearranged the covers to hide the wet spot, trying your best to recreate what the bed looked like before you got to it.

When you were finished, you hurried to your room, deciding you loitered long enough in Suguru’s. After a moment of recollection, you resumed your drawing, hoping to distract yourself from the lingering feeling of shame. As Suguru was the subject, though, it did little good. Sighing, you just continued sketching. You didn’t want to leave it unfinished, and doing so wouldn’t change what just happened. The only thing you could do is avoid making such a mistake in the future.

Chapter Text

Suguru had enough. He loved Nanko and Mimiko, yes, but they were an obvious problem when it came to spending time with you. Typically, he didn’t mind humoring them. At the end of the day, you and he shared a room, ensuring he’d always get some alone time with you.

Or so he thought.

You’d finally gotten comfortable enough with letting the girls roam the temple without you clinging to them, trusting that the servants would ensure their safety. This development had excited him, as it opened newfound possibilities, and birthed new plans for ways he could claim you.

Alas, though you could now allow them to wander without you, they still managed to find their way back to your side. And you accepted them with open arms, despite the fact that you and Suguru had been spending time in your quarter’s sitting room, you drawing while he read. Little conversation was had, but he was content with the peaceful domesticity of the situation, and the comfortable silence between you two. In Suguru’s mind, being able to quietly exist with another person was the ultimate sign of closeness.

Then, Nanako and Mimiko came bursting in, ruining the moment.

For him, anyway. You beamed and patted the spot next to you, giving them a piece of paper and making your pencils accessible to them so they could color with you. You always became chattier with them around, and Suguru couldn’t help but feel a little jealous you weren’t so open with him. He could appreciate silence, yes, but he also longed to hear your voice and hear you ramble about nothing.

He understood why you three were so relaxed around each other. You considered the little girls your sisters, and they thought of you in the same light. And the hell you three endured was bound to create a special bond that few could understand.

He knew this, but it still irritated him how they clung to you, and how you were just okay with it. It was selfish, yes, but he wanted some alone time with you, damnit!

“We’re getting you two a nanny,” Suguru declared during one breakfast, staring directly at the twins.

They just tilted their heads to the side, before resuming eating. You, however, weren’t so calm.

“What?” you immediately questioned, your eyes wide and growing panicked.

He knew you were reluctant to leave them around strangers, for good reason. Yet, you should know that he’d never allow someone dangerous around the twins. They were annoying at times, yes, but they were still a part of his new family.

“I believe it’d be good for them,” he said before he popped a piece of fruit into his mouth. “She’d also double as their tutor and create things for them to do. It’ll give them structure.” He looked back at the girls, smiling. “Are you two okay with that?”

“I don’t understand,” Mimiko said, looking at him with furrowed brows.

When her sister went quiet, Nanako nodded and resumed where Mimiko left off. “Why can’t you or Izumi teach us?”

Suguru expected you to agree with them. Instead, he saw you sink into your seat, a look of shame crossing over your face. He made a note to ask you about it later, as getting the twins a nanny was the more pressing issue.

“Well, being a leader means I have a lot of responsibilities, and training Izumi will be one of them, meaning we’d both be unavailable.”

His plan was foolproof. While the nanny was tending to them, you’d be at his side, being taught everything he wants you to learn.

You blinked at him, your shame melting away. “What?”

“You have a powerful technique, Izumi, one that you need to know how to control,” he explained, only continuing when you gave a nod. “I think it’d also be beneficial for you to know some self-defense moves, and perhaps knowledge of how to wield certain weapons.”

He didn’t plan to put you in any dangerous situations and would do everything in his power to ensure a hair on your head was never harmed. Yet, it was better to be safe than sorry, and it’d give him comfort if he knew you could defend yourself if he wasn’t present.

When he relayed this information to you, the blush he adored so much crept onto your face.

When you didn’t protest, he beamed. “Great, that settles it!”

“Actually, uh…could I get a tutor, too?” you asked quietly, keeping your gaze downcast.

Your words took him aback, robbing him of the ability to respond. Then, as he pieced the puzzle of your request together, anger replaced shock. If the monkeys of Kuroki locked you in a cage for a decade, of course, they’d rob you of an education. All for a gift that you couldn’t control, one that made you superior to them.

You must’ve thought his silence was a rejection, because you shook your head. “Never mind, it’s stupid,” you whispered, your dejected tone breaking his heart.

You shifted in your seat and refused to look him in the eyes, the request and his perceived rejection obviously embarrassing you.

“Can Izumi share our tutor?” Nanako asked, Mimiko nodding in agreement.

He had to give it to them, the twins always had your back, just as you did theirs.

“No, you girls will have a different set of work than Izumi.”

You started to fidget with your chopsticks. “They…Kuroki didn’t allow me to get an education,” you revealed, confirming what he already figured out. “And even before, my academic skills were rusty, so our skillset is likely…similar.”

In hopes of setting you at ease, he gave you a smile. “That’s no problem. We’ll just add some academic work to your training.”

You straightened at his words, releasing a little breath as you finally looked at him. “Really? You don’t mind?”

When it came to you? Never.

“Not at all. We’ll alternate between physical training and studying, and I’ll have a yoga mat and some textbooks delivered to you so you can continue your training when I can’t attend to you.” You deflated at the last part, so he quickly added, “Or if you feel like doing some extra work.”

Just as he knew he might not be around to protect you when needed, he was positive there would be times he missed your training sessions. Being the leader of a cult came with duties, after all, and slackening on them would be a sure way to cause discontent. He didn’t care about the feelings of monkeys, but seeing as he’d found a way to receive curses and money, it was in his best interest to protect his position.

The corners of your lips turned upward. “I’d like that. Thank you.”

If your small smile didn’t have him melting, the look of reverence in your eyes certainly did, and both let him know he was making the right call.

******

Suguru decided it was best for the girls to have a nanny before the training began, to give them something to do while you two were occupied. Even the arrival of your promised supplies didn’t squash the disappointment you felt at the news, as you were eager for Suguru to teach you, and for him to help you gain control of your devastating technique. Yet, you firmly believed he knew best, so you didn’t question his decision.

But seeing the string of beautiful women awaiting an interview, you regretted that decision.

He’d selected candidates that were employed in the temple. They were all exclusively women, and all had the ability to see curses. Most were in their early to mid twenties, and all were traditional beauties. Being miko—shrine maidens—they all wore plain white kimono with red hakama. Suguru wore his robes, so naturally, you wore one of your hakama and a golden hairpin he’d gotten for you. The blue hakama was just as vibrant as the miko’s, but the golden ribbon wrapped around your waist and the yellow flowers decorating your emerald top made your outfit fancier than theirs.

It was comforting, knowing your elaborate appearance made you stand out. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have a chance of competing with them.

Not that it really mattered, as you doubt it’d make a difference to Suguru. The miko were likely more appealing to him, anyway. Women that meet the Japanese beauty standard, with experience in life, and control over their technique. No matter the clothing you wore, they’d be above you.

The thought made you sulk, and you couldn’t help but glare at the final candidates. He was now in the process of interviewing one of the final four. Seeing your lackluster reaction, Suguru dismissed most of them quickly. At the current rate, the girls would be with a nanny and tutor. So, you tried to keep your face natural, and just nod along as Suguru questioned the woman about her cursed technique, a particular interest of his. A strewn of objects laid on the table in front of you, all for the purposes of displaying techniques.

Your baseless resentment stemmed from an accumulation of insecurities, as they’d done nothing to you. Most bowed to you the moment you stepped foot into the room being used to conduct the interview, and the ones that didn’t were dismissed immediately. Yet, despite the respect shown to you and your superior position, you couldn’t shake the idea that they were better than you.

You knew it was wrong to be so hostile, and it made you feel guilty about doing so, a feeling you were becoming quite familiar with.

Suguru dismissed the girl he was talking to when she revealed she could only see curses, then pointed to one of the remaining candidates. It was down to three, and none of them particularly stood out to you. They were all perfectly polite, and the traits that made you jealous of them robbed each woman of individuality. You were sure if you took the time to get to know them, it’d be different. But in front of their superiors, they conducted themselves in the same manner, as they’d no doubt been trained to do. As if your jealousy wasn’t enough of a challenge, their conformity made things even more difficult.

Perhaps, you should put in more effort to know more about them personally, instead of focusing on their qualifications and techniques.

She introduced herself as Moriko, then bowed. When the girl rose, you greeted her with a smile, a stark contrast to the pout that’d been etched onto your face. You allowed Suguru to ask her about her qualifications, giving an approving nod when she revealed she’d gotten a degree in education prior to becoming a miko, released a genuine gasp of surprise when she revealed she was a blackbelt in muay Thai—her tiny frame was deceiving—and gawked when she revived a dying plant via her cursed technique. Truth be told, she was your favorite so far, and you couldn’t help but wonder if it was solely because you were giving her a chance. Your guilt worsened. You had half the mind to call all the rejected miko in to apologize and give them a second chance.

Then, you realized how poorly that’d reflect on Suguru, and decided against it. A leader needed to show strength, and being tied to an indecisive girl who couldn’t control her emotions wouldn’t be a good look for him.

“What are your hobbies?” you asked, your question taking Moriko and Suguru aback. It was the most interest you’d shown thus far. “The girls…they need regular stimulation, so it’d be good if your hobbies matched with theirs.”

“I…garden, mostly,” she revealed, her tone growing timid and less robotic at the more personal question. “It works well with my technique.”

Suguru smiled at her. “It’s a reverse technique of sorts, no?”

You hoped he was looking at her with such a bright grin because he was being polite, not because he was actually interested in her. Moriko nodded, her cheeks turning pinker the longer she stared at Suguru.

You didn’t like that one bit.

“Cursed energy is inherently destructive, so for you to be able to revive things, you’re quite the gem,” Suguru hummed, the compliment making that little green monster inside of you rear its head.

This time, though, you’d deal with it in a more tactful manner. With great restraint, you kept your expression pleasant as you focused back on Moriko, even though you intended to dismiss her. Nannying would require her to work too closely with Suguru, and with the interest she was showing in him, you couldn’t have that.

So, you quickly searched your minds for polite ways to get rid of her, your smile becoming authentic when you found it. You straightened, trying to channel Suguru’s confidence to execute your personal mission.

“Ever since we moved here, I couldn’t help but wonder how that old greenhouse would look restored,” you said, patting yourself on the back when you saw interest enter Moriko's eyes. “It’s a shame for such a large structure to be left to decay…”

Not only was it big—the size of an average house—but it was on the edge of the temple grounds. Once or twice, you wondered what it looked like in its glory, but that wasn’t the purpose of your words. No, if your plan worked, she’d rarely be around Suguru.

Suguru chuckled, the deep rumble making you feel warm. “Are you suggesting she restores it?”

Thank God, he said it for you.

“With her technique, wouldn’t she be perfect for it? And we can spare one or two staffers to assist her, no?” You focused on Moriko, hoping your next works can sweeten the deal for her. “You can even pick them if you like.”

She shifted her weight, her eyes glimmering. “I... I’d really like that. And if allowed, I could show the girls—”

Nope.

“Oh, no, watching the girls and restoring the greenhouse would be too challenging. But you’d be welcome to show off your work when it’s complete,” you said, your tone almost sickly sweet.

You couldn’t help but be proud of your demeanor, as your typical stammering and quietness had seen themselves away.

“Yes, I think that’s a great idea, Izumi,” Suguru said before Moriko could reply, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “Moriko, you may pick two other staffers to help with this task. You’re dismissed for now.”

She rapidly blinked, as if trying to process the words she just heard. Once she did, she bowed before leaving the room.

“One of you, step forward,” Suguru boomed.

The shorter of the two moved first, then immediately bowed. “Ose Yumiko, at your service.”

“State your technique,” Suguru said once she rose.

You tensed, worried that it’d be something amazing and praiseworthy like Moriko. If that was the case, you didn’t know if you could summon another excuse on the spot.

“Liquefaction,” she answered, without missing a beat.

You sank down in your seat, the corners of your mouth tugging down. That sounded like quite the technique, one bound to catch Suguru’s attention.

Ose must’ve noticed your change in position because her head whipped to her, a frown of her own on her lips. “Is there a problem, miss?”

Before you had the chance to lie, Suguru stepped in.

“She didn’t address you, so you don’t address her,” he barked, glowering at her.

“I was merely asking a question!” she protested, her volume raising an octave.

“One you had no business asking,” Suguru replied, before waving her away. “You’re dismissed. Return to your regular duties.”

She stood frozen, staring at him with parted lips. “What?”

“You heard me, go,” he snapped, his eyes narrowing. “Or do I have to remove you myself?”

She stiffened at the threat, then shook her head. “No, sir, that won’t be necessary.”

She bowed, then exited the room, closing the door with more force than needed. With her abrupt departure, one woman was left. She had a head of thick, curly hair, was the tallest candidate, and seemed to be the youngest, too. The interview would be more of a formality, as she was the last one standing. Still, she stepped forward and bowed.

“I’m Chiharu Takara,” she greeted, not rising from her bent position. “My technique nullifies cursed energy. I studied Tai Chi under my grandparents and received a blackbelt in Jiu-Jitsu. I babysat throughout high school and helped tend to my younger siblings. I became a miko three years ago after I graduated high school, so I have no higher education.” Finally, she straightened and looked between you and Suguru with a nervous smile. “I hope that isn’t a deal breaker.”

It didn’t matter if it was, as rejecting her meant starting the process all over again, which you desperately wanted to avoid. Besides, as someone whose education stopped in elementary school, you had no right to judge.

“Don’t worry, it isn’t,” you reassured her.

She seemed nice enough, and as she’d likely become the girl’s nanny, you didn’t want to make a rival of her.

Suguru stood and gestured for you to do the same. “Congratulations, Chiharu.” He smiled at her, and you mimicked him. “We’ll discuss your duties further, then allow you to meet the girls.”

She beamed back at you two. “Please, call me Takaru.”

And thus, after an afternoon spent sifting through viable women, the girls had a nanny.

Chapter Text

You should’ve learned by now not to trust strangers. It was one of the first lessons parents taught their children, and you knew from personal experience that it was a valuable one. Time and time again, people unknown to you have shown themselves to be nothing but untrustworthy monsters who only sought to cause harm. You’d long ago stopped having faith in people and were aware of the dangers that came with giving strangers the benefit of the doubt.

But foolishly, you went against what you knew and trusted that Suguru’s judgment would be best. Even with initial doubts, you believed him when he said the girls needed a nanny. You should’ve spoken up when he first suggested it and told him they were fine without one. Instead, you allowed him to bring a stranger into the fold. Maybe if you hadn’t, Nanako wouldn’t be lying on the grass with a broken arm.

“What happened?” you snarled at Takaru, who was doing her best to soothe the blonde.

You’d been on your way to the gardens when you heard a piercing cry. Immediately, you ordered a passing maid to fetch Suguru, fearing the worst. Fortunately, no one was dead, but your heart had dropped to your toes when you saw Nanako’s arm dangling limply at her side, her face red and tear-stained.

The moment she noticed you, Nanako abandoned Takaru and managed to run to you. She threw herself into your arms, and you wasted no time taking over the job of calming her. Mimiko stayed close to her sister’s side, rubbing her head as if she were a cat.

“I said, what happened?” you repeated when Takaru remained silent. “Tell me or I’ll have you dragged out and thrown into the forest!”

Nature had decided to punish you for your sex, putting you in a volatile mood. Your little sister’s sobs weren’t doing your temper any favors. Not only were her wails breaking your heart, but for the first time in a while, you noticed an all-familiar blue shadow appearing in the shade of the garden.

It didn’t stay in the shade long, however. The longer Takaru’s silence stretched, the angrier you got. Your shadow was always fueled by your negative emotions and would often lash out at the source of your turmoil. This incident was no different, and before you realized what was happening, Takaru was sent to the ground. It was her high-pitched scream and Mimiko joining her sister in sobbing that brought you back to your senses. The most effective technique for regulating your emotions was regulating your breathing. After some deep breaths, your shadow dismissed itself.

“Get up,” you ordered when Takaru remained on the ground, her eyes misty.

In seconds, she got to her feet, her eyes wide and fearful. “Ma’am, it was an accident, I swear!”

Your mouth twisted into a frown, and just like that, your anger surged again. You couldn’t help but wonder if she would’ve come to inform you of what happened had you not stumbled upon them.

“Your job is to prevent accidents! Now tell me what happened,” you barked, the harshness of your tone surprising even yourself.

Rarely were you annoyed, but the day was ruined for you before you even got out of bed. When you woke up, it felt as if your stomach was being trampled from the inside. You’d been unable to leave the bed until you realized how damp your boyshorts were. When you hurried to the bathroom, you discovered the bloody cause of your discomfort.

For the first time in nearly a decade, your period had come.

Fortunately, the bathroom had already been equipped with menstrual supplies and pain medication. You’d started getting periods earlier than most other girls, and your parents were never one to sugarcoat the process of sex and reproduction, saving you from the embarrassment of needing to ask for assistance.

You should be celebrating, as the return of your period meant your body was getting healthier. Yet, the pain and discomfort it caused made you wish it had stayed away.

“Don’t be mad,” Nanako croaked as Suguru came storming out.

When he took in the scene, his expression darkened. His robes and hair flowed in the wind, the glare marring his face and his flaring nostrils making him look no less handsome.

“What’s going on?” he asked, his tone just as hostile as yours.

Takaru shrunk back. “Nanako…broke her arm, sir,” she mumbled, averting her gaze as Suguru’s eyes narrowed.

“How?” was the first thing he asked.

“She…climbed a tree and a branch broke,” Takaru finally confessed, looking between you and Suguru as she fidgeted with the bow of her dirt-stained hakama.

“I threw a cat in the pond,” Nanako blurted through her tears, making you whip your head in her direction, utterly bewildered by her words. “It bit me…and it hurt.”

Suguru blinked at her, his anger being replaced with shock. “So…you threw it…in the pond?” he spoke slowly as if struggling to process this piece of information.

“That’s why she climbed the tree,” Mimiko said quietly, still stroking her sister’s hair. “She didn’t want to get in trouble.”

“And I was trying to get the poor thing out of the water when the branch broke,” Takaru said, bowing. With the twins vouching for you, she appeared to have gained some confidence. “I apologize for my mishap. I’ll make sure not to do it again.”

“Suguru, can you get her arm seen too?” you asked, not acknowledging Takaru’s apology. She remained bent, waiting for permission to stand.

Without hesitation, he took Nanako into his arms and stood, shushing her cries as he carried her away to the doctor who resided in the temple’s clinic—a safety percussion you were now grateful for. You watched after them as they departed, a deep sigh leaving you. Mimiko trailed behind them, leaving you alone with Takaru.

“You may stand,” you breathed, some of your anger having been alleviated.

She straightened immediately, blinking rapidly. “Ma’am, I’m so sorry—”

“You…couldn’t leave the cat in the water,” you grumbled, cutting her off.

A part of you was annoyed that she thought the cat was more important than your sister, but you knew the pond was too deep for the cat to escape by itself. Moreover, you’d told Nanako time and time again to leave the temple cats be, because you knew they’d lash out at her eventually. What happened today were the consequences of her own actions. Takaru’s fault was taking her eye off the unruly child.

“Your apology is accepted, but I won’t be so kind if you ignore them again,” you warned, your jaw tightening as you recalled how pitiful Nanako looked. “And if either of my sisters are harmed under your watch ever again, I’ll set you on fire.”

The threat spilled from you before you could stop it, to the shock of you both. Takaru took a step away from you, her jaw slackening. Her lips trembled, sending shame through you. You opened your mouth to apologize, then shut it. You’d seen Suguru threaten people many times, and he commanded much respect. Why would it be any different for you?

She swallowed, then nodded. “V-very well, ma’am,” she whispered, her voice shaky.

Your brows rose ever so slightly, a combination of feelings going through you. You decided to show the pleasure you felt at her terror and pushed your guilt away. Her fear could be her penance for her negligence, and embracing your positive emotions would prevent your shadow from making a reappearance.

You stepped toward Takaru with a cruel smile. She was taller than you, but she still cowered as you closed the space between you two. “You’re dismissed for now,” you said, the calmness of your voice a far cry from the aggression you first showed to her.

She wasted no time hurrying away, her eagerness to escape your presence pushing a disbelieving laugh out of you. As twisted as it was, after being a helpless victim for years, it felt good to now have enough power that people feared you.

It was wrong, but your interaction with Takaru had given you a mood boost, ridding you of the irritation that’d been plaguing you all day. Considering your little sister’s arm was broken and cramps were still plaguing you, it should’ve been reversed. You should be enraged, too infuriated to have a surge of confidence. Alas, you weren’t.

You decided not to dwell too much on your emotional state, as there were more pressing matters at hand. With a pep in your step that shouldn’t be present, you made your way to the clinic to check on Nanako.

******

It’d just been a broken arm. No doubt, it would’ve been painful, but it’s more than survivable. Modern medicine meant such an injury wouldn’t be life-altering, let alone life-ending.

So why was Nanako so pale, save for a trickle of crimson by her mouth? Why was she so still, when she normally had trouble staying in one spot for a second? And the silence…shouldn’t she be howling in pain?

The longer you stared at her, the heavier you felt. The high that you’d been riding from your rush of power was long gone, being replaced by a tightness in your chest that refused to slacken. Mimiko had her face buried in your hakama, quiet sobs racking your body. She was never shielded from the harshness of this world, so she understood that her sister was gone. Silent tears of your own spilled from your cheeks as you absent-mindedly played with her brown hair. You looked at Suguru, hoping for him to provide some explanation, only to find his face crestfallen.

“What…what happened?” you questioned, your voice barely a whisper.

After a maid had escorted you to the clinic, Suguru had dismissed the doctor. They were useless now, anyway. The moment they left, silence echoed in the room, all eyes glued to the greying girl lying on a cot, a white sheet covering her from the neck down. You wished they’d covered her head before you came in. Her eyes had been wide open when you entered, a permanent expression of pain and fear etched onto her face.

“What happened?” you asked again. Louder this time, but your voice was much shakier.

“Internal bleeding from the fall,” Suguru said quietly, his eyes vacant and far away.

“You took her to the clinic immediately? Why…why is she dead?”

Your voice cracked as you pushed the question out.

“They…they were focused on her arm, and internal bleeding kills quickly.”

Mimiko sobbed louder when you were given the explanation you so desperately wanted. You could only nod in response, your eyes glued to Nanako’s corpse. The absence of her big personality reminded you how small she truly was. Years of being deprived of proper nutrition made her tinier than a typical child her age.

“I want the doctor and Takaru gone,” you gritted, rage filling you as you thought of the two people who failed your sister.

Takaru was supposed to watch her, and when she fell flat of that job, the doctor was supposed to heal her. Both failed to do their duties.

“They will be, don’t worry,” Suguru muttered, a tinge of anger entering his tone, the emotion replacing the vacant look in his eyes.

A fresh batch of hot tears streamed down your cheeks, the sob you’d been holding back finally leaving you. You placed a hand on Nanako’s cold cheek, wishing she’d open her eyes, that your tears would be able to bring her back to life like in fairytales. But real life was far crueler, so she remained still.

Remained dead.

******

When you woke up, you found that your cheeks were damp with tears, and your heart was racing as if you’d just run a marathon. A clap of thunder made you jump, a small whimper leaving you. You were never a fan of storms, and your fear of them worsened during your imprisonment. The building you’d been contained in was old and leaky. Raindrops often made their way through the roofs and would breed mold that gave the place a permanent funk. The sound of rain hitting the roof became more prominent when the bout of thunder passed. The gentler sound relaxed you, and for a moment, your mind was at peace.

Alas, your mind wouldn’t allow you to feel tranquility for long. As soon as the fear brought on by the thunder passed, it quickly reminded you of the nightmare that’d brought you to tears.

You instantly understood it was a nightmare. In contrast to the events of your frightening dream, the doctor had carefully inspected her to ensure that she only had a broken arm. But the anxiety and fear that were consuming you wouldn't go away, and your permanent companion showing itself gave you no choice but to get out of bed. You quietly slipped out of the room and headed to the twins', doing your best not to make a sound. You didn't want to wake Suguru.

You hurried down the halls of the temple, a sense of urgency overtaking you as you neared Nanako’s and Mimiko’s room. You knew it was just a bad dream, but the stress it brought on wouldn’t be soothed until you saw they were well and alive.

As you neared the twins’ quarters, childish giggling stopped you in your tracks. A smile tugged at your lips, the sound of their laughter immediately easing your unease. The door was slightly cracked, allowing slivers of light and sound to spill out. Inching closer, your ears picked up on soft singing. You quickly recognized Suguru’s voice, and you were taken aback by how lovely his singing was. His speaking voice was always pleasant—incredibly attractive—but you wouldn’t have anticipated he’d have such a melodic singing voice.

Peaking through the gap, you saw that Suguru had dragged one of the room’s sitting chairs between the beds. Nanako’s arm was wrapped in a cast and propped up with a pillow on her chest. Both girls were giving Suguru their undivided attention, their eyes growing droopier the longer he sang.

You recognized the lullaby he was singing as a traditional cradle song, Edo Lullaby. It was one your mother had sung to you once or twice, and one your favorite schoolteacher would sing to her students during naptime. The girls had heard it before. When they had a particularly hard time sleeping, you’d always sing it to them. They’d told you that you’d been the first to sing them to sleep, something that had broken your heart. Even your mother, with all her pitfalls, would find it in her to occasionally lull you to sleep with her voice. It was something simple, a basic luxury all children deserved to experience. Knowing that Suguru cared enough to take the time to soothe them back to sleep warmed you.

A soft snore interrupted Suguru’s singing, and you realized the girls had fallen asleep. When he noticed they were both out cold, he chuckled. He stood from the chair, and you scurried away, worried you’d be caught creeping. You had every right to check on your sisters, but being caught eavesdropping on such a moment was very unappealing to you.

Too bad that’s exactly what happened.

“Izumi?” Suguru called, making you stop in your tracks.

You took a breath, hoping it’d give you some courage, then turned around with a bashful smile. “Hey, Suguru. Couldn’t sleep?”

He returned your smile. “I could ask you the same thing. Nanako’s okay, by the way. The painkillers took care of the pain, and she’s handling them well,” he revealed as if sensing your inner turmoil.

You looked at him with wide eyes, endlessly impressed at how accurately he could read you. “Am I so obvious?”

“No, I just know you well.” He stepped toward you, closing some of the distance between the two of you. “Why are you awake?”

“For the same reason that I came to check on the girls,” you confessed.

Your cheeks heated, but you tried not to show any embarrassment. Your fears held an inordinate amount of power over you, even when they were based on little truth.

“You had a nightmare?” he guessed, closing the gap between you two. He thumbed at your cheeks, your tears now dry but your eyes still red and puffy. “You poor thing.”

Your lips parted as his fingers touched your face, your hands growing moist from sweat as your nerves flared up. You noticed his smile grew, the gleam in his eyes making your breath hitch. Your worries melted away, and all you could focus on was Suguru’s nearness and his delicious scent that was engulfing you.

His eyes flickered to your lips, making your heartbeat wildly. He leaned closer and clamped a hand over your shoulder, and instinctively, your eyes fluttered close. His breath, still smelling of his minty toothpaste, fanned over your face. Anticipation built in you, and you licked your lips, wanting them to be moist when they met his.

Except, they never did.

Seconds passed with you awaiting a kiss, one that never came. The corners of your mouth tugged into a frown, and you opened your eyes, only to find him grinning mischievously at you. You couldn’t help but glare at him, but your glower was quickly wiped away when his lips found your cheek. You slowly placed a hand over your blessed bit of skin, your mouth agape.

“There’s your kiss, Izumi,” he whispered, his mouth right by your ear. “Do you want to sleep with me tonight?” A gasp left you at his forwardness, which soon turned into a squeak when more thunder boomed. Your reaction only served as further amusement to Suguru. “Not like that, dirty girl. I’ll be a good boy and keep my hands to myself. And protect you from the thunder.”

Oh God, you weren’t sure how much more of his teasing you could handle. You were thoroughly flustered. Your entire body was hot, and an incessant ache was settling between your legs as filthy thoughts flooded your head. His lips felt so good on your cheek, so you could only imagine how they’d feel in other places.

When you continued to silently stare at him, his humor started to flee. “Did I make you uncomfortable, Izumi? If I did, I’m sor—”

You realized he mistook your giddy shock for something adverse, when in reality, it was anything but.

“No, you didn’t,” you quickly reassured, composing yourself. “You just shocked me…”

Just like you wanted, you seemed to have set his mind at ease, his grin returning full force. “So, you wanna share my bed?”

You’d love to be in his bed, with proper permission this time. But the lust Suguru had created was clouding your mind, and prevented you from accepting his offer, as there was no way you’d be falling asleep with it present.

******

You were an idiot.

You were so consumed by desire, and the pain medication was so effective, that you forgot about the bloody havoc your body was subjected to. Putting a towel down to protect your sheets hadn’t even crossed your mind, and you couldn’t differentiate between the menstrual blood and the slick your needy hole had produced. You were so unused to dealing with periods, that once the cramps left, you forgot that your body was protesting your lack of pregnancy. Only when your fingers had come away with a glistening red tint did you realize the error of your ways.

One shower and change of clothes later, you were now faced with the issue of your bedding. It was a task you didn’t feel like dealing with. You’d sat on the couch of your quarter’s sitting room, considering sleeping there for the night. It wasn’t as comfortable as the mattress you’d grown used to, but you’d slept in far, far worse places.

“You’re still awake,” Suguru said, appearing in front of you just as you were on the brink of nodding off. He took a seat next to you, looking at you with concern. “Are you okay?”

Yeah, you’d just soiled your bed sheets because you were a horny idiot.

“Yeah…I just can’t sleep,” you responded, deciding to go with a truth of sorts.

He’d be disgusted if he knew the full story, and you’d be crushed if you lost his favor, so the omission of key details it was.

“Unless you plan on sleeping upright, you aren’t going to.” His comment earned him the side-eye, which made him hold his hands up. “I mean no offense. It’s just an observation.” When you didn’t respond, the concern that was present in his eyes made its return. “Wanna talk about it, Izumi?”

You shook your head. The anxiety you’d felt from the nightmare had long left you, replaced with regret that you’d given in your carnal desires. That seemed to be a theme when it came to Suguru, arousing you to such a point, that your judgment slipped right away.

“If you don’t want to share mine, do you want me to tuck you into bed?” he asked, his eyes twinkling.

“No,” you answered hurriedly, cringing at the thought of him seeing your messy sheets.

Stupid, you were so stupid.

“No…to which?” he questioned.

“To both.”

The moment the words left your mouth, thunder sounded for the umpteenth time. This time, the lights flickered, too, temporarily plunging the room into total darkness. A small scream left you, and when the lights came back on, you saw Suguru standing in front of you, his hand outstretched.

He wiggled his fingers. “C’mon, take it. And I’ll let me guide you where you to go, and if it’s your room, I won’t step foot over the threshold.”

The longer you stared at his hand, the harder words became to form. Deciding that speaking was a lost cause, you stood from the couch and grabbed his hand, heading to his room. The chuckle that left him made your heart skip a beat, and you grew lightheaded at the thought of having him close to you all night long. You could only pray that your pad didn’t fail you.

Chapter Text

Many times, throughout your life, you wondered if you were cursed. You’d endured so much, and everything you tried seemed to go awry. Since Suguru had saved you, that started to be less true. When he liberated you and the twins, a shift seemed to happen. Things no longer seemed as bleak, and your life didn’t seem so disaster prone. Finally, you had someone to protect you, someone who helped turn your life around. The savior you so longed hoped for had finally arrived. Dreams once forgotten now seemed possible, and the universe seemed to have forgotten the grudge it held against you.

When you woke up in Suguru’s arms, you wondered how the two of you got in that position, as the two of you had fallen asleep on separate sides of the bed. Regardless, you counted the intimate position—one mimicking a couple’s embrace—as a little apology gift from the Gods. Your closeness made your cheeks feel impossibly hot, but you felt more rested than you had in ages. You were thankful that the two of you had gravitated toward each other at some point in the night.

Then, you realized your pad had failed you, and wondered what kind of monster you were in your past life. The Gods had in fact not given you a break, but decided to play a cruel trick on you, one that left you in tears as you stared at the blood stain of Suguru’s sheets.

“I’m so sorry,” you said with a sniffle, swiping at your watery eyes.

It was something beyond your control, nothing but a gross accident. Still, it left you incredibly ashamed. It was bad enough you had to wash your sheets, but now, you’d gone and ruined Suguru’s.

“Hey,” he crooned, leaning down, and swiping at your teary cheeks. “It was an accident.”

You were seated on the edge of the bed, while Suguru stood before you. The two of you had just woken up to the bloody surprise ten minutes ago, and you had yet to change out of your soiled bottoms, too busy offering pointless apologies. He, the gift from the heavens he was, was trying his best to reassure you.

“But…” you trailed off, unable to form a proper argument.

You knew what he was saying was true, but it was still a distressing surprise to awaken to. It was a miracle it hadn’t gotten on his clothes. If that had happened, you wouldn’t have been able to live with the embarrassment. You would’ve just curled up and died, and as you took your final breath, you’d tell Suguru to give the girls whatever they wanted.

On the bright side, you’d been spared from that grim scenario.

“No buts, Izumi. We’ll just have a servant wash the sheets, okay?” You nodded, and he smiled. “Good girl.”

Your face felt warm at the nickname, and your heart started to beat a little faster. It was kind of pathetic how everything Suguru said or did made you swoon, especially because you were well aware you were out of his league. And after the kiss on the cheek, you were officially a goner. It wasn’t the first time he’d done so, but it still left you flustered. But really, any crumb of affection he gave you left you flustered.

“Now, get up,” he said, holding a hand out to you.

You blinked. “What?”

“You need to get cleaned up, and I’m sure you’re cramping, poor thing,” he explained, grasping your hand and tugging you up. “Are you?”

His words didn’t help your embarrassment, but since he wasn’t making a big deal out of it, you decided to the childish emotion aside. It was a natural part of womanhood, a nuisance most of the female population dealt with, so why act coy?

“A little,” you admitted, averting your gaze as he pulled you into the bathroom. “I took some painkillers last night, but they wore off.”

He hummed. Releasing your hand, he set out to prepare a bath for you. In the back of your mind, you wondered if he was going to bathe you as he did all those weeks ago. Unfortunately, you didn’t have the guts to ask him. But if he decided to stay, you wouldn’t be opposed to it. Unlike then, you’d welcome his presence.

Suguru must’ve thought periods were a serious issue because he didn’t hold back on the salts, bubble bath, and oils. He dumped them all into the steaming water, a lovely floral scent floating around the bathroom. You were positive the bath would coax you back to sleep when you needed to start your day.

“There,” he announced as he turned off the water.

After retrieving a washcloth and towel for you and headed for the door. You couldn’t help but frown. “You’re leaving?”

He paused and looked at you over his shoulder. “You want me to stay?”

You did. You’d like nothing more than to clean yourself off, and then waste the day away in his arms, his large hands massaging your pained abdomen. But the simple three-letter word you wanted to say got caught in your throat, so you just shook your head.

“Then yes, I’m leaving, Izumi,” he said, a small smile playing on his lips. “I’ll have a maid prepare you tea and fetch you some painkillers. You’re also wearing your headpiece today.”

“What?”

He’d gotten you a golden floral hair clip. You adored it, but seldom wore it out of fear of damaging it.

His smile grew. “I can’t leave you alone in your condition, Izumi. What if you need something?”

“But…you have things to do?”

Lately, it had become a part of his daily routine to ‘heal’ those who couldn’t see curses, those too weak to rid themselves of the monsters terrorizing them. Your experience with normal people was far from pleasant, as seldom had been kind to you. If it was up to you, you’d let them suffer.

“And you’ll be joining me for them. Now, get in the water before it gets cold.”

His declaration shocked you, and nerves coursed through you at the thought. Before you could argue with the decision, he was pressing a kiss on your forehead, making your eyes grow to the size of saucers. As he pulled away, you caught sight of the mischievous smirk on his lips, and the wink he’d sent you as you stared dumbly at him made your face flame. He didn’t wait for you to regain your ability to speak before he left the bathroom, gently shutting the door behind him.

A part of you wished he wasn’t so free with his affection, as it only fueled the fantasies that’d never be fulfilled. You knew that men weren’t picky when selecting women to sleep with, but it was a different story when choosing a life partner. So, while Suguru might’ve been content showering you with physical affection, it didn’t mean he meant to make you his. But being as pathetic as you were, you’d gladly give yourself to him under any circumstances, even if it was only for a night.

Until that happened, though, you needed to find the courage to voice your desires. It could’ve been out of respect for your boundaries that he withheld making advances. You’d gladly respond to them, but you were too skittish for that to be obvious.

However, that was a problem for another time. Your clothes were dirty, and you had nothing else to do besides bathe. So, you forced yourself out of your stupor and entered the warm, inviting water that Suguru had so kindly prepared for you.

Chapter Text

Suguru turned to you as another poor unfortunate soul filed out. As much suffering as your abilities caused you, you now counted yourself lucky that you weren’t among the weak. Suguru made you realize your powers and capability to see things others couldn’t was a gift, not a curse. And, more importantly, it prevented you from heavily relying on others for total protection. Sure, you had a long way to go before you mastered your powers, but you were steadily making progress, thanks to your weekly training. You wish Suguru conducted your sessions more often, but unfortunately, he was an incredibly busy man.

“How are you feeling?” Suguru asked as his gaze quickly scanned over you.

Heavenly. Suguru had you right by his side and had been pampering you the entire day. Despite the mortifying morning—at least for you—and the cramps assaulting you periodically, you were practically floating from joy.

But instead of sharing how you really feel, you simply murmur, “I’m okay.”

He looked down at you, the large pillow he’d set by his feet resulting in you being a good deal lower. His throne was elevated and made him look even more regal. He was stunning, and you’d never tire of admiring his beauty, even if you weren’t bold enough to verbalize such a thing.

“You’re comfortable?” he asked, the worry tinging his tone making your heart beat a little faster.

Incredibly. Sure, you felt a little like a pet in your current position, which wasn’t helped but him occasionally petting your head as if you were a loyal dog. But you were coming to realize that your pride was non-existent when it came to him. So, while some might consider it humiliating, you were perfectly content.

You nodded. “I’m fine, Suguru.” You smiled at him, wanting to put his mind at ease. “Truly, you don’t need to fret.”

He returned your smile, then planted a large hand on your head to ruffle your hair. Your smile slackened. You were fine with the petting, but hair ruffling made you feel like a child. You wanted him to treat you as a grown woman, not a little girl. Worse, it messed up the hair that your headpiece didn’t hold at bay.

“I know, but it’s your first period, so—”

Your shocked giggle interrupted his words. “No, it isn’t, Suguru.” His misguided belief temporarily stole away your embarrassment at your feminine affliction. “I start menstruating before Kuroki.”

He blinked. “But you were a child…not even ten.”

“I started earlier than most girls,” you explained, the growing look of anger and concern confusing you.

“Is that…like a genetic thing?” he asked quietly.

Your brows furrowed as confusion swamped you. “Suguru, why are you so concerned about my periods?”

“Just…” he trailed off, then opened his mouth and closed it. Shaking his head, he summoned his grin back in place. “Never mind. It isn’t important.” He started to massage your scalp, as if he knew such a sensation would make your mind blank. “What matters is that you’re feeling well.” With that, he refocused straight ahead, schooling his expression. “Next!”

You mimicked him, focusing on the door to the grand room he used to conduct the healing sessions. Within seconds, it swung open, revealing a beautiful young woman who appeared to be a few years older than you and Suguru. Her most striking feature was her long pink hair, and the tight T-shirt she wore revealed a shapely figure and large bust. You tried to keep your expression flat as you examined her, knowing that showing too much emotion could get Suguru into a pickle. But, seeing how he perked up and how the woman’s cheeks became a pretty pink as her eyes landed on him made that hard.

“Geto Suguru, correct?” she asked, entirely focused on him.

Your jaw clenched at her voice. It was soothing to the ear, practically designed to entice. And based on how Suguru was examining her, it was working.

“You’re correct, ma’am,” he confirmed with a smile, one that made your fist clench. “And you are?”

The question made your lips purse, and your chest felt tight. He hadn’t asked the other people about their identity, so what made her special?

She bowed. “Manami Suda, at your service.”

He chuckled. It was a sound you normally loved to hear but knowing that this woman was the cause of the attractive noise made it far less captivating. Right now, it was more akin to nails on a chalkboard.

“Shouldn’t that be flipped, ma’am?”

She rose with a smile, one that lessened when she finally looked at you. Something about the way she looked at you was reminiscent of that sales attendant all that time ago. Then, you’d been filled with envy at her put-together appearance, and at how Suguru was treated with respect you were denied. While the latter sentiment remained present, the former was replaced by plain irritation. Your hakama and the embroidered silk kimono under it were gorgeous, and the golden hairpin likely cost more than her entire outfit. You knew her disdainful look wasn’t due to judgment of your attire, but your nearness to Suguru.

“Please, call me Manami,” she corrected, her voice holding a breathiness that wasn’t there moments ago.

You were far from the only woman to recognize his attractiveness, if the whispers from the miko and female staffers were anything to go off. And unlike you, many had no issues expressing it. You’d become accustomed to the giggles of women whom he glanced in the direction of and longing looks, so even if you didn’t like it, you could’ve brushed off Manami’s behavior if Suguru wasn’t so receptive. That was something you weren’t used to.

“Well, Manami,” he repeated, the purring of her name making you frown at him. “How can I be of service?”

“You have it wrong, sir. I don’t want you to serve me…. I want to serve you,” she announced, making Suguru cock a brow and you clench your fists harder.

Your nails would surely leave indents, but it was the only way you could maintain a semi-civil façade. Even as jealousy coursed through you, you didn’t want to embarrass Suguru. All you could do was pray he wouldn’t cast you aside for someone else so easily. Not only would it be soul-crushing, but who knows what would happen to you and the girls if he did? As much as you were trying to remedy your uselessness, you weren’t equipped to survive without assistance.

“I’m afraid I’m struggling to understand what you mean,” Suguru said after a heartbeat of silence. “The temple is thoroughly staffed, so if you’re looking fo—”

“I want to serve you, not the temple,” Manami interrupted with a growing blush, one that made you think her next words would be lewder than they actually were. “I wanted to be your assistant, but I see you already—”

It was his turn to interrupt, now.

“Izumi’s my companion, not my assistant,” Suguru corrected, the little scowl that swept across Manami’s face making petty satisfaction surge through you. “Her only job is to be my side and learn.”

“What a lucky girl,” Manami said, her posture too tense for her new smile to be natural.

“I consider myself lucky to have found her,” Suguru said, sparing you a glance that made you melt.

Your lips parted, and despite your hair being decently styled, you felt the need to brush a strand behind your ear. “Thank you,” you whispered, your first words since Manami entered the room.

His words eased some of your jealousy and replaced the dreadful emotion with the more familiar adoration.

“I can see…things others can’t,” Manami announced, redrawing attention to herself, and summoning your annoyance back. Knowing she had the sight didn’t help matters one bit, as it only increased Suguru’s interest. “And knowing you heal people of mystery afflictions makes me think you do too. And I wanna do what you do or help your cause in any way I can.”

The conviction in her voice took you aback and rendered you both speechless. Suguru likely in consideration, but you…well, beyond plain jealous and annoyed, you didn’t know how to feel. In one way, it would be admirable if it didn’t pose a threat to you.

“I have others I must see,” he announced after some seconds, the way his words made her deflate resulting in the corners of your mouth turning upwards. “But I’ll have someone show you to a room so we can discuss your offer more at length.”

You crossed your arms over your chest as he called and instructed a maid to show her to a room. Ideally, he’d have sent her packing, not thinking about keeping her so close to him. When you two were left alone again, he frowned as he finally took note of how tense you were.

“Izumi? You alright?”

When you didn’t immediately answer, he sighed, then reached over to draw you into his arms. You squeaked as you settled into his lap, an arm around your middle securing you in place. Then, he placed a hand on your midsection, rubbing little circles over the fabric of your hakama.

“There. That should help them.”

“W-what?” you stammered, your breathy tone making him smirk.

“Your cramps.” He tilted his head to the side. “That’s what’s wrong, no?”

No. Your jealousy was the issue, but you refused to admit such a thing. So, you nodded.

“Yeah.”

He let out a hum, his hand not faltering. “You don’t have a heating pad…so you can sleep in my room tonight. I’ll help keep you warm.”

Your cheeks flamed as your eyes widened. “Excuse me?”

“What?” he asked innocently, the twinkle in his eyes letting you know he knew exactly how that sounded. “You don’t want to cuddle? Or did you think I was talking about something else?” He tsked before you could answer. “You’re quite the naughty girl, Izumi.”

The more he teased, the harder it became to look him in the eye. The way his voice lowered into a seductive purr didn’t help matters.

Instead of acknowledging his words, you could only push out, “Cuddling’s fine.”

At your confirmation, you swore he held you a little tighter. “Good. I can’t wait.”

The words were whispered directly into your ears and made a shudder go through you. Still averting your gaze, you began to stroke the hand massaging your stomach, continuing to do so even when he called for another desperate soul to enter. Right now, you were too electrified to be concerned with how they may perceive such a scene. Manami Suda was completely forgotten; Suguru’s gentle touch robbing you of any irritation.

******

You really needed to grow more of a backbone. When Suguru concluded he’d seen enough people, the two of you returned to your quarters to unready yourselves. You spent more time than necessary getting ready for bed, wanting to smell, look, and feel as good as possible for him. When you were thoroughly cleaned and moisturized, you crept into Suguru’s room wearing a pair of sleep shorts and a tank top. The moment you stepped foot into his designated area, he informed you that he had to go talk to Manami about her offer and that he’d be back later. Despite the annoyance you felt at his words, you complied when he said to get in his bed and wait.  

After the first hour ticked by, you should’ve left. Instead, you stayed. Another hour passed, and thoughts that you didn't want to think started to enter your head.

Just what was taking him so long?

The ache grew worse with each passing minute. Although it was clear that Manami caught his attention, you didn't really expect him to stand you up for her. Once more, your naivete led to heartache.

You’d been looking forward to cuddling. You could still feel the warmth of his hand on your tummy. He’d left it there for the entire session, snapping at the few brave—or stupid—folk that had the nerve to question it. Even in front of the prying eyes of others, the entire thing felt so intimate. The closeness to his large physique, his scent that you couldn’t get enough of. Everything about him was intoxicating.

A thud made you jump and distracted you from your conflicted thoughts. You heard the door slide open before promptly being shut.

After so long, Suguru had returned. His footsteps approached the bed, but you stayed motionless. You kept your eyes closed and your back to him, pretending to be asleep. You knew you were stupid for not speaking up, but what was the other option? Hearing what he and Manami talked about? What they could’ve have been doing together? Maybe, he’d touched her as intimately as he had you earlier in the day. The thought made a pang go through your heart, and you immediately pushed the idea out of your head.

Suguru would do that? Would he? He wouldn’t. Surely, the tenderness he treated you with meant something.

The bed dipped as Suguru finally slid in beside you, a small, exasperated sigh leaving him. If you didn’t know better, you’d say he felt bad for leaving you alone for so long. But he was someone always in control, so surely, his prolonged absence was due to his desire to stay away.

After some minutes, you heard fabric rustling, followed by muffled masculine moans and the soft, moist sound of skin meeting skin.

What the hell was he doing? No, scratch that, you knew exactly what he was doing, and it mortified you.

Did Manami truly make him so horny that he had to flee to his bedroom to jerk off, not even caring that you were right next to him?

 You pressed your eyes shut tighter as the noises created by him rubbing himself picked up pace. You should’ve jolted up and chided him for doing something so…perverted. Instead, you stayed as still as possible, a combination of hurt and lust going through you.

Your mind was racing, the lewdness of the situation nearly unbearable.

In the back of your mind, you’d started to hope that he felt attracted to you, that he’d see you as a viable partner. You knew such a thing was unlikely, but at times, his teasing seemed to be too amorous to just be a joke.

Alas, you were wrong, and that hurt more than you thought it would. And the shame created from the lust created by hearing Suguru please himself certainly didn’t help matters. It became a struggle to stay still and keep your breathing even, but you knew if you didn’t, an awkward conversation would spawn. So, like the coward you were, you allowed Suguru to think that he got away with his perverted, traitorous actions.

******

Unbeknownst to you, Suguru hadn’t intended to spend so much time with Manami, nor was she the cause of his arousal.

He intended to go into more depth about how she found him—because being easily tracked down could cause a world of trouble—the specifics of her offer, and what her technique is. He believed he’d be back within the hour. Instead, she went in depth with everything he asked her, the questioning alone lasting over an hour. Then, when he asked about her technique, she decided that showing it would be better. It was impressive, he’d admit, but nothing that couldn’t have been described in a few sentences.

When he finally stumbled into his room, disappointment swept over him as he examined your sleeping form. It didn’t last very long, however.

You must’ve been tossing and turning, because the covers were thrown off your upper half, revealing your tight, white tank top. Even in the dark room, he could see your breasts straining against the fabric, threatening to spill over. The straps needed adjustments, because despite the top’s tight fit, they had slid off your shoulder. He didn’t know what you were dreaming about, but it had your brows furrowed and lips pursed into a pout. You looked adorably sexy, and it went straight to his cock.

He resisted the urge to touch your delectable-looking skin as he slid in next to you. Instead, he settled for raking his eyes over your upper body, craning his neck to see the tops of your tops and the outline of your nipples.

He contemplated heading to the bathroom to take care of his hard-on, simply due to how depraved it would be to jerk off next to you in such a vulnerable state, staring at you like a creep. But he was a selfish man and far from righteous, so he stayed right where he was. Besides, you were asleep, so what harm could it do?

Suguru was a creature of habit. He had a routine in many areas of his life, and masturbation was no different. First, he’d spit on his hand before collecting the droplets of precum oozing from his tip. Once his rigid cock was covered in the natural lubricant, he began to slide his hand along his twitching length. Since meeting you, he’d close his eyes and pretend that his fist was your pussy, even though he’d bet everything he had that the walls of your cunt felt indescribably better than his calloused hand.

Tonight, another step must be added, one designed to keep the depths of his degeneracy hidden. Suguru wasn’t afraid to be vocal in bed, rather he was masturbating or fucking. But with you so close to him, that wasn’t possible. So as one hand tugged at his cock, the other clamped over his mouth, muffling the moans spilling from him.

He didn’t take his eyes off you, thankful that your back was to him. He longed to touch you, to feel the softness of your skin and pepper kisses all over your body. Taking a risk, he leaned over to get a better view of your breasts, his dick jumping when he saw your nipples had grown harder and your top had fallen lower, revealing more of your pretty tits. The groan he released was too loud for his hand to silence.

Suguru was by no means a one-pump chump. However, even the thought of you made lasting long a hefty feat. He’d have to work on that, as once he had you, he intended to fuck you for hours on end. But he’d have to worry about that another form, as the sight of you so vulnerable and exposed had him cumming within minutes.

He knew he was a nasty, filthy man for wanting to taint and claim whatever innocence you had left. Knowing this didn’t make that desire go away, though. Because no matter how twisted it was, he was determined to see his fucked-up fantasies become a reality.

Chapter Text

You truly needed to grow a backbone. No, scratch that, you needed to develop some standards, some pride. Suguru’s moans shouldn’t be echoing in your head, inspiring a mixture of arousal, jealousy, and shame. They definitely shouldn’t cause your cunt to ache with want, nor should you be using the shower head to alleviate that bothersome ache.

You whimper as the stream stimulates your swollen clit. For some reason, your fingers hadn’t been doing the job. When you discovered you could adjust the water pressure, it was as if the stars aligned, giving you a brilliant idea. The moment the water made contact with your cunt; a moan was pulled from you. Finally, you had some relief.

Tension was building in your core, your legs trembling as you held to shower head between them. The shame you felt over getting off to Suguru’s muffled moans only brought you closer to the edge.  It was contradictory, but you couldn’t help it. Maybe, it was a kink of yours, one birthed with the goal of protecting you. Or perhaps, your borderline obsessive admiration of Suguru meant you’d always find a way to appreciate his actions, no matter how hurtful.

The thought made a frown tug at your lips. If that was the case, you might need to consider distancing yourself from him. How’d you do that, you hadn’t a clue. But you were setting yourself up for hurt, and you’d be stupid not to try to steer yourself off a doomed path.

You started to grind against the showerhead, determined to erase the thoughts of him. What better way to do that than with an orgasm? As of late, you’ve discovered just how amazing the sensation was. The ones you had in Kuroki were always tainted by self-hatred, but that wasn’t the case in the safety of the temple. At least, not to the same degree. In the temple, even when the cause of your arousal was a hit to your pride, your climaxes wouldn’t cause soul-crushing shame.

A whine bursts forth as you reach your peak, your body trembling with pleasure. You keep the showerhead to your cunt as you come, eyes squeezed shut and lips parted. Despite your best efforts, you can’t help but imagine it was Suguru making you come, the memory of his muffled moans prolonging your release. When you come down from your high, you take some seconds to catch your breath, then complete washing yourself. Once you finished using the showerhead for the intended purpose—cleaning yourself—you turned off the water.

You steeled your nerves as you dried yourself off and finished getting ready for the day, knowing Suguru was still in the quarters. When you left the safety of the bathroom, you’d have to pretend you weren’t just getting off to the memory of him masturbating next to you.

You didn’t feel much guilt over what you’d just done. Yes, it was rather perverted, but so was getting off next to a sleeping woman. Rather, you felt shame that you were still so entranced by someone who didn’t want you.

Sighing, you finished dressing, forgoing your elaborate kimono for a plain green one. Suguru had acquired a wealth of blue hakama and green kimonos, some plain and others embroidered. In conjunction with the causal street and loungewear he’d bought you all those weeks ago, your closest was nearly at capacity, a first for you.

You ground your jaw together as you tied the golden belt around your waist, your outfit the same color scheme as Suguru’s. The thought nearly made you yank it off, but you liked how it accentuated your figure. Right now, you didn’t want to match with him, your sense of betrayal still lingering. You’d been looking forward to feeling his stupid strong arms wrapped around you, the warmth of his hand soothing the havoc your uterus was wrecking on your body.

Damn him for making you feel so special, for making you feel wanted, just to dish you for a woman he’d just met. Worse, he lusted after her in such a disgusting manner. Yes, your crush on him had led to many unsavory masturbation sessions, but you had the decency to do it alone. It’s like he was mocking you, as if he wanted you to hear what he was doing. Suguru was a scarily intelligent man, so perhaps, he knew you were awake and just didn’t care.

Maybe, your best course of action would just be to ignore him and put him at arm’s length. Instead of viewing him as a friend or being hopeful that you two could become lovers, you just needed to treat him as a teacher.

Easy, right? Nope, because just the thought of pushing him away made your heart hurt.

By the time you’re dressed, a frown was marring your face, one that nearly morphed into a scowl when you see Suguru. In contrast to your sour expression, he wore a bright smile. And instead of his elaborate priest robes, he wore sweatpants and a T-shirt, his beautiful hair tied up. Your brows furrowed, and before you could stop yourself, you were asking about where he was going.

So much for ignoring him.

“Going somewhere?” you asked as your eyes scanned him, unable to not admire how good he looked, how his muscular physique was still evident even with the baggy clothes he wore.

Curse him for being so attractive.

“We’re going to the gardens,” he said, his grin growing as your brows furrowed. “Go get changed, we’re starting your physical training.”

You blinked, his words shocking you into silence. So far, he’d focused on the educational aspect of your training as opposed to the physical. He was an incredibly accommodating teacher, going at a pace that ensured you’d absorb as much information as possible, going over the things you didn’t understand, and praising your strengths. If you’d had teachers like that as a child, perhaps you would’ve applied yourself more and wouldn’t be such a stunted adult.

“Go,” he urged, shooing you away with his hand. “It’s too soon for you to train in that.”

“You’ll have me train in this?” you asked incredulously, knowing that’d end with you tripping over your skirts and falling to the ground in a heap.

He chuckled, and crap, but you had a weakness for the sound that you doubt you’d ever overcome. Your stupid heart had to flutter every time he laughed as if you never heard men’s laughter before.

But of course, Suguru was unlike any man you’d ever met before. He was miles better than the rest, and easiest the handsomest you saw.

“Not now, don’t worry,” he reassured. “But you’re going to have to learn to do so eventually.”

That was a day you’d be dreading, as you’d certainly make a fool of yourself.

“I laid your outfit on our bed,” he continued.

“Our?” you repeated, your cheeks heating, because you were a lost cause when it came to him.

He cocked a brow. “We sleep in the same bed now. Doesn’t that make it ours?”

He was playing with your emotions on purpose, he had to be. He had to have noticed the effect he has on you, the way you enjoy being around him.

After what he did, you should’ve corrected him and informed him that you two had separate rooms for a reason. But he made you spineless and made you feel as no one ever had. He made you feel like you had value and potential, like you mattered. He saved you from a bleak situation, from a nightmare you had long resigned yourself to.

Maybe that’s why instead of correcting him, you beamed and agreed, before bounding away to do as told like the lovesick fool you were.

******

When you stepped out wearing the workout shorts and open-back T-shirt, Suguru applauded himself for choosing such attire. The shorts exposed your legs and thighs, the spandex fabric clung to your ass, and the open-back shirt allowed him to easily admire your backside. He almost didn’t pick a shirt for you and just made you wear a sports bra so he could ogle your tits. You were so obedient, he knew that you would do whatever he willed, no matter how uncomfortable it made you. But as tempted as he was, he decided that it would be a step too far.

For now, anyway.

“These shorts show a lot,” you mumbled as you walked up to him, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.

“Well, who would’ve thought that shorts would be short?” he hummed, grinning at your glower.

Your hair was loose, which wouldn’t do for what he had in mind. The HIIT workout he was going to put you through would build your stamina and muscles, things you would need when it came time for your combat training to start.  Loose hair would be a nuisance whilst you were jumping about, and just make you sweatier. So, he wordlessly took the extra hair tie off his wrist, then grabbed an extra off a nearby table when he decided you’d look delectable in pigtails.

“What are you doing?” you asked as his chest pressed against your back, your question containing an adorable little squeak.

“Putting your hair up,” he answered as he used his fingers to comb out any tangles, then separated your hair to create two little ponytails.

Once he was done, he grabbed your shoulders and spun you around to face him. You were obviously flustered by his closeness, and your lips were slightly parted. Just as predicted, pigtails complimented you nicely, and the expression on your face made him imagine a far lewder situation. The images floating through his head went straight to his cock, and he shifted to avoid the hard length pressing against you.

The fucker struggled to stay soft in your presence, due to Suguru’s infatuation with you, and a painful lack of pussy. He longed to feel the walls of your cunt pulse around him, and as the days passed, he was starting to question his decision to let you make the first move. With how shy you were, who knew how long that’d take?

“Uhm, are you ready?” you asked, pulling him from his fantasies.

Shit, he’d zoned out.

He aimed a grin at you, something he knew was a favorite feature of yours.  It might’ve been a little shitty of him to use your blatant crush against you, but hey, he’d done worse before.

“Yep, let's go,” he said, grabbing your hand and guiding you out of the quarters.

The walk to the garden was short and silent. Once the two of you were outside, he led you to a particularly scenic spot by the Koi Pond. He often worked out there, so a large exercise mat designed for the outdoors was always present. It was big enough for both of you to move around, providing an easy place for him to train you.

“First up,” he said, dropping to his knees and motioning for you to do the same. Your wide eyes betrayed your shock at his sudden movements, but you complied within seconds.

Always such a good girl.

He placed his hands shoulder-width apart and made sure his knees were below his hips. “We’re starting off easy, this is called the cat/cow.” He inhaled deeply while rounding his back and tucking his chin to his chest, making sure to suck his abdomen in. “This is the ‘cow’ part,” he said as he exhaled, lowering his belly and arching his spine, now gazing upward. “And this is the ‘cat’ part.” He sat back on his heels and smiled at you. “Easy, right?”

You nodded, and without needing to be prompted, you tried to mimic what he did. He inched closer, scrutinizing your form, totally not admiring how deep you could arch and thinking of other ways that could be beneficial. The simple stretch left little room for error, but your form could be improved upon. And as your teacher, he of course had to help you. He totally wasn’t looking for excuses to touch you or ways to test your body’s limits for future reference.

“Like this?” you asked after you finished your first rep.

“Almost,” he said, creeping closer as you went into the ‘cow’ portion of the stretch.

He’d be more than happy to help you during the ‘cat’ part, as it resembled a position that he longed to put you in. Ironically, it was named after the feline’s species famed enemy, dogs.

 He placed a hand on the outside of your thighs, your shorts allowing him to feel the softness of your legs. You inhaled sharply as he spread your legs so they could be the proper width apart. His smile took on a more amorous vibe, and he could resist poking some fun at you.

“This is the ‘cat’ part, Izumi,” he informed you as moved to your arms, guiding them until they were shoulder’s width apart. “You need to exhale, not inhale.”

“S-sorry,” you stammered, your breathing growing labored as his fingertips skimmed the back of your hand and then trailed to your wrist.

Suguru had no excuses to adjust your wrist, but he was eager to abuse this excuse to touch you so freely.

“It’s all right,” he hummed, truly not minding the little mistake.

He licked his lips as he came behind you, careful to not let his hard-on graze your ass. Excitement rushed through him at the view he received, the image of you before him on all fours certain to stick with him for a long, long time. He placed a hand on your lower back, thanking the Gods for giving him the foresight to choose a backless shirt. The little whimper that left you as he arched your back nearly made him groan. Suguru resisted the urge to tear your bottoms away and fuck you where everyone could see, reminding himself he had an image to maintain.

However, it wasn’t like the servants could do anything to stop him if he chose to act on his desires.

He reached over and grasped your chin, tilting it to the sky. Then he backed away, something that was very necessary. Any longer, and he may just give you a different kind of workout.

Chapter Text

You felt like you were dying. The warm-up consisted of basic stretches and easy exercises, leading you to believe the main workout would be a piece of cake. At first, it was. Running in place for a minute did make you a little breathless, but it was nothing you couldn’t handle. The squats activated your lower half, and the introduction of the classic Jumping Jacks made you break a sweat. But still, your confidence remained. Suguru’s causal touching was a great encouragement to soldier on, as he’d adjust your form and give you a pat on the back or a squeeze on the shoulder after every completed exercise.

Then, a hellish move known as the ‘burpee’ was introduced, and you regretted ever exiting the bathroom. After just five, you were lying on the ground, ready to embrace death with open arms. Somehow, you managed to stagger to your feet and finish the workout, but not even the cooldown erased your aches.

“You okay?” Suguru asked as he gulped down water he had a maid bring.

Despite doing the same workout you had, he’d barely broken a sweat. That alone made you glower at him, before eagerly downing the cup of water he offered.

“That was awful,” you said once the glass was drained, still a tad breathless. “Can’t we just stick to studying?”

He chuckled. “I’m afraid this is a necessary evil, Izumi.”

“Why?” you questioned, confused about what he had planned for you that’d require such extreme activities.

“It’s important that you’re in decent shape,” he said with a sigh. “What if you need to defend yourself?”

You frowned. “But you’d protect me.”

You may be doubting if he harbored any attraction to you, but you didn’t doubt that he’d put his life on the line to protect you. He’d slaughtered an entire village to free you from a cell, and that was before you two even knew each other.

“I would, but in case I’m not around you need to be capable of defending yourself. What if you’re somewhere with the twins and something happens, and I’m not there to save you?”

You went silent, unable to argue with that logic. Dread was coiling in your gut just at the thought of harm befalling Nanako and Mimiko. You'd gladly suffer if undergoing regular torture sessions would ensure their safety.

With a sigh, you nodded. “Okay. You’re right.”

He smirked at you. “I know.”

You rolled your eyes at his remark and stuck your tongue out at him before you could stop yourself, the childish gesture making him chuckle.

“Oh, so that’s how it is?” he hummed, approaching where you were sitting with a cartoonishly menacing grin.

A squeal of laughter leaves you when he wiggled his fingers, and you narrowly dodged his attempt to tickle you. Soon, the two of you were running around the garden like children. Your tiredness had disappeared, the impromptu game giving you a burst of energy.

“Let me tickle you, dammit!” he yelled as you shimmied past him.

You knew he was letting you ‘evade’ him. If he wanted to, he could have you on your back in a second. Still, that didn’t take the fun away.

“No!” you said around giggles, sticking your tongue out again as you continued to dodge him.

So lost in your attempts to evade him that you didn’t notice a rock in the grass. A squeak left you, and in a desperate attempt to regain your balance, you grabbed onto Suguru. But instead of steadying yourself, you only sent him to the grass with you. He grabbed onto your waist and somehow maneuvered himself in a way that allowed him to cushion your fall. You land on top of him, your face in the crook of his neck and his hands remaining on you. His scent flooded your nostrils, and not even the smell of sweat could take away how delicious it was. You’re overcome with the desire to just inhale him in, but think better of it.

Your face flamed when you realized how intimate the position is. When you regained your bearing and tried to stand, his arms tightened around your torso.

“You okay?” he murmured, his voice huskier than normal. You don’t trust your voice, so you just nod. He smiled. “Good.”

Unable to help yourself, you brushed a strand of his sweaty hair off his forehead, then slid your hand to his cheek, letting it linger. His breath hitched, and he craned his neck upward. You lowered your face, your breath intermingling as your lips near each other’s. Anticipation filled you as he came closer, ready to receive the kiss you’d been longing for.

But instead of his mouth meeting yours, he pecks your nose. You blinked, and before you knew it, he was kissing your cheeks, then your forehead. Your entire body flushed as he peppered kisses across your face, heat rising within you. But as enjoyable as you found the feeling of his soft lips gliding across your skin, he was avoiding the one place you wanted him to kiss you most. Based on the glint in his eyes, he knew exactly how much you wanted him to kiss you on the mouth.

His teasing was starting to tire you. Steeling your nerves, you psyche yourself up to just kiss him, to take charge for once. You took a breath to calm your racing heart, then leaned forward.

However, by now, you should know that the universe will always find a way to foil your plans. Conversely, the heavens seemed to shine down on Suguru, ensuring that his will would be carried out one way or another. While you desired for your lips to meet, he felt like teasing you within an inch of your life. Thus, the powers that be decided his side was the right to take. That was the only explanation as to why the nanny candidate that you’d dismissed to the greenhouse chose to show herself at this moment.

“Sir!” she shouted, prompting Suguru to look in her direction, resulting in the kiss meant for his mouth going on his cheek.

Damn her.

You couldn’t help but glower in her direction after Suguru placed his hands on your waist and hoisted you off him, standing and dusting himself off. In a moment of frustration, you grabbed the rock that’d put the two of you in such an intimate position and chucked away. Unfortunately, hurling the rock didn’t ease any of your vexation, it simply put a stone in the middle of the pathway.

Once Suguru recomposed himself, he grabbed your hand and aided you in raising off the grass, but even the feel of your hand within his didn’t erase your annoyance. The woman—whose name you barely remembered—was carrying a gorgeous mixed bouquet of colorful flowers, a proud smile on her face. Suguru cocked a brow as she handed the bouquet to him, though he didn’t refuse them.

Damn him.

“They’re from the greenhouse, sir,” she explained, bowing her head. “I hope I’m not out of line, but I thought I should show off the fruits of our labor.” She smiled at her choice of words. “We have actual fruit, too. I would’ve brought some, but I didn’t know what you favored.”

Suguru returned her smile, and suddenly, you were reminded why you planned to distance yourself from him; he was a tease who enjoyed playing with your emotions.

“I’m fond of persimmons,” he informed her. 

“As am I, sir,” she said, still not having acknowledged you.

Her blatant snub made anger surge through you. You hated how people always disregarded you. You had been free of Kuroki for quite some time now, and your life had improved vastly. Yet, the way people viewed you hadn’t quite changed, though you now resided in a lavish temple in a city far away. Just like in that blasted small town, you were seen as something to be ignored, scorned, or feared. If it weren’t for the girls and Suguru, you’d remain an outcast, even as a free woman. 

“Do I get anything, Moira?” you asked, hoping you’d guessed her name correctly.

Her smile faltered. “It’s Moriko, ma’am.”

It was wrong, you know, but seeing her deflate lessened your irritation. You found it amusing how she expected sweetness from you when she’d been pretending you didn’t exist.

A smirk made its way onto your lips, and you shrugged. “I got the first two letters correct, and that doesn’t answer my question.”

“Izumi,” Suguru murmured, a slight warning in his tone, one you intended to disregard.

He didn’t make any effort to include you, despite you being right by his side, so he had no right to dictate your reaction.

“Well?” you prompted as her silence, the way she squirmed under your gaze vindicating you.

“Uhm…we only prepared one bouquet,” she mumbled, her eyes glued to her feet.

You felt your eye twitch, and a petty part of you wished she would’ve tripped over a rock as you had and destroyed the stupid flowers.

“If I recall correctly, we gave you two workers. Surely that’s enough for two bouquets?” you questioned, mimicking Suguru, as you always did when you talked to the staff.

He wasn’t unkind to them, but he was no-nonsense, and always carried himself like a king. Though when couldn’t fault him for that. Dare you say, when many saw him as a God, acting like a king made him humble.

“Uhm…”

“Well?” you asked, barely registering the door to the gardens sliding open.

You yelped as a smack was delivered to your backside, the culprit being none other than Suguru Geto. You stared at him with a gaping jaw, your face warming. When Moriko giggled, you whipped your head in her direction and narrowed your eyes. You opened your mouth to ask her what was so funny, only for another smack to render you speechless. Not only did the blows themselves shock you into silence, but the heat that rushed through your entire body made you realize you didn’t exactly hate being spanked, even in front of a lesser. In a depraved way, it felt good.

“Behave,” Suguru chided, his hand stroking the area of impact.

You couldn’t suppress the shiver that went through you, nor could you deny the action made your cunt start to ache.

“You’re dismissed,” he said to Moriko. “Thank you for the flowers. Next time, whatever it is that you bring, please bring enough for both me and Izumi.”

“Of course, sir,” she said, bowing. When she rose, she faced you, her face being tinted pink. “I apologize for my lack of foresight.”

“Forgiven,” you said, Suguru’s punishment having the intended effect.

However, though he got his desired results, they were for a reason you doubt he was expecting.

As Moriko left, Manami took her spot, making you groan internally. Suguru had taken her on as his assistant and had gotten up especially early to show her the ropes. That alone you couldn’t fault him for, nor could you blame her for being attracted to Suguru. But you could fault him for being a traitorous pervert, and her for being rude.

 She bowed, before focusing on Suguru. “Sir, you have a matter to deal with,” she said cryptically.

She cast you a glance then lowered her voice, making it clear she didn’t want you to hear. You rolled your eyes, but returned to the exercise mat on the ground so they could chat in private. You sat down and leaned back on your elbows. Closing your eyes, you tilted your face to the beaming sun, relishing the warmth it provided. If Suguru felt like you should know what they spoke of, he’d informed you. At least you hoped he would, because you were beginning to suspect that your perception of him might be flawed.

“Izumi, I have to go,” Suguru said.

You cracked your eyes open, surprised to see that he looked excited. Just what was he going to do? The insidious voice in the back of your head tried to convince you he was eager to leave your company, perhaps to spend time with another woman. You quickly tried your best to suppress the thought, knowing how illogical it was. But that didn’t stop your chest from tightening.

“Why?”

“I must deal with a curse. I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

The information snuffed out your pesky, self-doubting notion. Yet, it made a new kind of worry bloom. You knew that Suguru was a very capable man—one that was literally in a special category—but part of your training included educating you on curses. As such, you’d been made aware of how deadly the creatures you saw could be. 

As if sensing your worry, he smiled and kneeled. “I’ll be okay, Izumi.”  He leaned over, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Promise.”

Your heart fluttered, and though your worry wasn’t put to rest, you nodded. “Okay.”

He stood. “I’ll try to be back by nightfall. If I’m not, don’t wait up.”

You didn’t like the sound of that, especially since you’d grown used to sleeping next to Suguru. Yet, it wasn’t the first time he left you hanging, nor was it the first time he left you for Manami. So, you just nodded again.

“Don’t worry, I won’t,” you said, patting yourself on the back for managing to keep your voice steady as the hurt you suppressed came rushing back. Unable to help yourself, you added, “I’ve learned my lesson.”

Suguru paused, his eyes widening every so slightly as he detected the lingering pain in your voice. The last part was merely a whisper, but that didn’t prevent him from hearing you.

“Izu—”

“Sir, the curse is moving, we need to get going!” Manami interrupted, the sound of her voice making you cringe and Suguru's eye twitch.

You heard Suguru sigh, and tendrils of shame started to invade you at how defeated it was. Unable to look at him, you kept your head lowered, focusing on the wind gently swaying the greenery all around you.

Suguru didn’t say anything further, and you kept your gaze on the plants as he joined an awaiting Manami. Only when you knew his back was to you did you drag your eyes up. Though they kept a respectable distance, jealousy rushed through you at seeing her at his side. More than that, you were envious that she was useful to him. As his assistant, Manami would aid him in his goals. As his ward, you were fully dependent on him, yet another task for him to deal with. The thought made you frown, and you found yourself unable to relax. The thrill of the sunlight gone, you become hyperaware of the sweat clinging to you and drenching your clothing, filling you with disgust. You stood and walked away.

But the universe wasn’t done with you just yet. In a moment of irony, the rock you’d thrown in frustration struck again. You stumbled over it for a second time, and if it wasn’t for the gardener who was conveniently passing by, you would’ve fallen face-first into the ground.

“Are you alright?” he questioned, grabbing your shoulders to balance you.

The powers that be and your mother must’ve had similar taste in TV shows, because that stupid rock put you into situations straight out of cheesy dramas. At the very least, it seemed to have been decided that you’d take the main lead. That was the only explanation as to why two handsome men saved you from tumbling to the ground on the same day. The gardener couldn’t compare to Suguru—you doubted anyone could—but he was certainly good-looking. He had more of a boyish charm. His days spent working in the sun must’ve given him a tan, which made his blond hair and light brown eyes even more outstanding.

“Ma’am?” he prompted at your silence.

 You blinked, then flushed when you realized how impolite you were being. “Uhm, I’m okay.”

He smiled and released his hold on you, scoping down to pick up the bucket of tools he’d cast aside to rescue you. “That’s good. Mr. Geto would’ve had my head if something happened to you.”

“Why? It wasn’t your fault.”

“But I was close enough to intervene, which I did.”

You huffed a laugh. “You make him sound irrational.”

“He’s made it very clear we, the staff,” he clarified when your brows furrowed, “are supposed to prioritize you and your sisters.”

You couldn’t help but smile. Not only had Suguru made it clear that you are to be protected, but he extended the same ordinance to Nanako and Mimiko. If nothing else, he took his self-issued role as your guardian seriously. It also brought you joy that Suguru respected your appointed title as the twins’ big sister, even though he knew you weren’t related to them by blood.

“I can’t disagree with him about my sisters, but I don’t want to get in the way of your work,” you said, stepping aside so you no longer blocked his path. “Thank you for saving me.” You held out a hand. “I’m Izumi.”

He chuckled, the joyous sound making your smile grow. “I know.” He removed a glove, then accepted your outstretched hand. “Tsuda Shin, at your service.”

“Well, Tsuda, I hope we can meet each other again,” you said.

He retracted his hand, and you couldn’t help but notice how attractive his dimples were. “I’d like that.”

You stepped away, twinges of guilt going through you as butterflies started fluttering in your stomach. Suguru had no romantic claim to you but enjoying the company of another man—one that you acknowledged as handsome, no less—felt like a betrayal of sorts. Why that was, when Suguru had no problems interacting with other women, you hadn’t a clue.

“I should let you get to work, Tsuda.” You gave a quick bow and put more distance between you two. "Have a nice day."

You had an extra pep in your step as you returned inside the temple, your brief interaction with Tsuda lifting your mood.

Chapter Text

It was hours before Suguru returned. In that time, the mood boost Tsuda had given you had faded away, being replaced by a sense of dread. Your eyes were glued to the clock on Suguru’s bedside table, time seeming to drag on as you awaited his return. Out of habit, you’d gone to Suguru’s bed instead of yours. Unfortunately, the mattress felt too big without him. To pass the time, your mind began to speculate what was taking him so long. Awful scenarios kept you from falling asleep. You couldn’t help but worry that the curse had gotten the better of him and that he was gravely injured, lying in the middle of nowhere without a soul to help him. What if he was using his last breath to call out for aid, to no avail?

What if he’s dying all alone, without knowing how much you truly cared for him?

You began to hyperventilate at the thought. As upset as you were over the attention he gave to other women, you didn’t want anything to happen to him. Even if he was a tease, he saved you and your sisters from a dire situation, one that would’ve ended in a miserable death without his intervention. Beyond your crush on him, he’d become your best friend, the first man that you’d ever felt safe around, and the first person to make you feel worthy. He was your anchor, the rock you’d grown to always rely on. If he was gravely injured, you’d be crushed.

Moreover, the twins had grown to adore him just as much as you did, and you had no clue what would happen to you, Nanako, and Mimiko if he left your lives.

You jolted up, throwing the covers aside and hurrying to the bathroom. Clutching the counter, you started to practice the breathing exercises you’d come to rely on. When getting oxygen into your body became easier, you turned on the sink and splashed water on your face. If sleep was a lost cause, you’d do something else to pass the time. Maybe, you’d finish that drawing that’d gone neglected for too long.

Taking in one last deep breath, you exited the bathroom. Instead of going to Suguru’s room, you headed to your own, B-lining for the desk where your drawing supplies were strewn out. Your eyes swept over the half-finished drawing of Suguru, one of many. He’d become your muse, his masculine beauty making him the perfect art subject.

The outline was done, but it still needed to be colored. You decided to start with his hair, one of your favorite features. It was enviable in its length and thickness, and his dedicated time to it only made it more beautiful.

Just as you finished shading the last strand, a deep, muffled groan caught your attention. You froze, looking away from the drawing and to your door. You saw a familiar outline pass by the screening, heading to his room. Concern shot through you when you noticed he was hunched over and clutching his side. You saw him open his door, then freeze.

A moment of silence passed, and then he called out, “Izumi,” his shaky voice making you fly out of your seat.

“I’m here,” you answered, throwing your door open and rushing to his side.

Your heart dropped at his appearance, his sweatpants and shirt full of holes and stained with blood, the exposed bits of skin being bloody and scratched up. His hair wasn’t tied up as it’d been when he left, but instead, it was flowing down his back and sweaty strands clung to his forehead. It was messy, the opposite of the manicured straightness you’d grown used to, and you swore you saw some plant life tangled in it.

You swallowed hard as a combination of relief and worry swamped you. Relief, because he had returned alive. Worry, because you’d never seen him look so…. awful.

“My God…what happened?” you whispered, stilling when he wrapped his arms around you and buried his face in the crook of your neck.

“A strong curse, but I got the bastard,” he replied against your skin, satisfaction in his tone despite his injured state. “Why weren’t you in the room?”

“I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to draw.”

“Oh. Is it finished?”

How could he talk about something so unimportant, when he’d just had to battle for his life? You shook your head, not in the mood to discuss your artwork. You had bigger things to worry about.

“It isn’t, but let’s talk about it another time. We need to get you cleaned up.”

He didn’t protest as you pulled him to the bathroom, instead just saying, “We can do both.”

You stayed silent, not wanting to tell him you were too concerned about him to do anything else but tend to his battered body. You placed the plug in the drain and started running a bath for him. A hand to the forehead revealed that he was colder than he should be, so you made sure the water would be nice and warm. You threw in some Epsom salts, then retrieved the medical supplies kept under the counter. 

“You’re going to nurse me back to health, how sweet,” he said in a teasing tone, one that would’ve had you blushing in embarrassment if it wasn’t for your worry.

A frown tugging at your lips, you handed him some painkillers, using one of the disposable plastic cups set aside for mouthwash to provide him with water. Your tutoring was coming in handy because otherwise, you wouldn’t have a clue which pills were the correct ones. But due to Suguru’s efforts to teach you, you’d been able to not only select painkillers but intentionally choose one with a sedative to aid him in falling asleep. You imagined his injuries might make that a challenge.

You nodded in approval when he swallowed the pills without objection, then began to gather the other needed materials from the container. “Undress,” you ordered as you took out the needed supplies.

He gasped dramatically, but you didn’t miss how concerningly raspy it was. “Izumi, how forward!”

You looked over your shoulder and glowered at him, though he succeeded in flustering you. “You know what I mean!”

“I do,” he agreed with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes and tried to suppress a giggle. You retrieved a hot cloth, peroxide, and a comb to remove the first layer of grime. He sat on the toilet seat, wearing only his underwear. You did your best to avert your gaze and focus on the task at hand, refusing to ogle his beautiful face and perfect body while he was in such a vulnerable state.

First things first, you wiped off his face, then used the cloth to dab at the dirt coating his wounds. You’d hold off on applying ointment and bandaging him until after his bath, but you put some peroxide on the cuts, wincing when he let out a pained hiss.

“I’m sorry,” you murmured, hating to cause him discomfort even if it was necessary.

“Don’t apologize for taking care of me,” he said, giving you a small smile in an attempt to reassure you.

You returned it, and with his wounds seen to for the time being, you started plucking the leaves and the branches from his hair. You tossed them onto the floor and vowed to deal with the mess later when Suguru was tucked away in bed. Once his hair was free of foreign objects, you started running the comb through his hair. You combed out his tangles the way your mother taught you to, starting from the bottom and working your way up, and focusing on any snags. When you were done, the nastiest snags were gone, though a somewhat unpleasant odor clung to the strands. A hair washing should take care of that.

You turned your back to him, setting everything on the counter. “Get in the tub.”

“So demanding,” he said lightly, though moments later, you heard the water swishing as he entered. “Here I thought you were a submissive little thing.”

You flushed, and his words may or may not have turned you on. Then again, it was Suguru. The only thing he could do that’d turn you off is flirt with other women.

You wrang the washcloth out a few times to free it of grime, then crotched down next to the tub, trying your best to ignore the presence of Suguru’s muscular, glistening body. The scars marking his flesh added to his appeal, as they were visual evidence of his strength. The bathtub was large, allowing his big body to fit in, but his height meant his legs had to be bent. His elbows were resting on his knees, his thighs peeking through the water.

Gulping, you focused on his hair, dumping water on his dirtied strands then running a comb through them again. You decided to save shampooing and conditioning it for another time, as he had a rigorous hair routine that wasn’t possible to complete at that moment. As it was, making sure the lingering dirt was washed away proved to be a challenge.

“You know,” Suguru said once you washed his face—this time with soap—a smirk on his lips. “This’ll be easier if you join me.”

As tempted as you were to accept, you were too bashful to do so, even as a joke. Moreover, you didn’t think he was being serious, and if he was, the pain could be affecting his logic. So, you shook your head, then lathered the washcloth with body wash to move on to cleaning his body.

“Cute, but no.”

You’d moved on to washing his chest, and you were unable to stop your breath from catching as your fingertips skimmed his toned abdomen. God, his skin was so smooth. Did every part of him have to be perfect?

"Did you get a concussion as well?” you asked after a heartbeat of silence.

Maybe, those painkillers were stronger than you thought and were messing with his mind. Yeah, that had to be it.

 “My brain is fine,” he said, and unless your ears were deceiving you, you swore his voice was huskier. His eyes flickered over you, and you tried your best to maintain composure. “You look to be struggling.”

You became even more flustered. “Well, I’m not.”

 You began scrubbing his back, which was in a worse state than you initially realized. Seeing how injured he was took away your growing lust, making you more impervious to his broad shoulders and defined back. Once that was done, there was one place left to be cleaned, an area you wouldn’t dare touch. Wringing the cloth out, you handed it to him, then turned your back.

“You have to finish up,” you said, grabbing the towel to hand to him once he was done.

“I don’t mind if—”

“Just do it!” you squeaked, the thought of touching there making your face heat.

His smooth chuckle was your response. Your back to him as he washed his most intimate parts, you were unaware of Suguru’s gaze being glued to your backside, which your sleep shorts covered little of. You were also clueless about the thumb grazing the slit of his tip, and that the resulting moan was one of pleasure, not pain.

******

Suguru cleaned and bandaged, the two of you migrated to the bedroom to deal with the next task, his hair. Though you hadn’t given it a proper wash, you didn’t want the inky locks to become dry or messy. So, he sat on the floor while you oiled it, soft sighs leaving him as you massaged his scalp and ran your hands through his hair. As beaten as he was, he seemed to be enjoying the attention you were dedicating to him. You smiled softly at the thought of him liking your touch, and you might’ve prolonged the oiling process just to hear more of his little whimpers. You also enjoyed the domesticity of the situation, and though you knew you weren’t his, tending to him allowed you to fantasize about what being his woman would be like.

However, his hair could only absorb so much oil before it became grossly greasy. So, as much as you wanted to keep touching his strands, you forced yourself to comb it again. His hair was unbelievably tangled, but once you finally tackled the last of the snares, you tried to put his locks into two thick braids.

Keyword, tried.

Turns out, weaving three strands of hair together was a lot harder than you remembered. To be more specific, braiding Suguru’s hair was above your expertise. The only hair you regularly styled was yours, Nanako’s, and Mimiko’s, all different from his. Even then, the styles were acceptable at best, but never great.

You huffed in frustration as the braid unraveled yet again. Taking a breath, you started another attempt but were forced to halt when Suguru placed his hand over yours. He stood from the floor and sat on the bed next to you, grinning as he examined your pout.

“It’s okay, Izumi,” he soothed, rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand.

“But it isn’t done,” you said, immediately cringing at how whiny the words sounded.

“And that’s okay,” he replied with a gentle smile. “You’ve done enough for me.”

“But—”

You inhaled sharply when he placed his lips over yours, silencing you. Your eyes were wide, a contrast to his closed ones, and you were tense, a contrast to how relaxed he was. It was so sudden that your shock overruled the enjoyment. And just as your eyes fluttered close and you began to mimic the movements of his lips, deepening the chaste kiss, he pulled away. A whine of protest left you, before your eyes widened in realization.

After weeks of craving him, Suguru kissed you.

You pinched yourself, wondering if you were dreaming. But when you felt the sting, you knew you were wide awake. He grinned.

 “I’ll teach you how to braid my hair another day, and then some,” he said, before he brushed lips over yours again, pulling away after a second and leaving you speechless. “But it’s late, and I’m tired.”

Your ability to speak was still gone, so instead of answering verbally, you nodded and laid down next to him. You tended to sleep on your left side, your position of choice since childhood. It was the most comfortable for you, but it also meant you were facing away from Suguru. He didn’t seem to mind, though, as he immediately pulled you to his chest and placed a large hand on your belly. He massaged the soft skin there, awakening the butterflies that never lay dormant long in his presence.

Suguru must’ve been feeling affectionate, because soon after, he was fondling your breasts over your shirt. You whimpered against him as he squeezed lightly one of your tits.

“S-Suguru, what are you doing?”

“Let me have you,” he murmured.

Heat swept through you at his words, though your brows furrowed when you realized his voice had a slight slur.

Your breath hitched as his lips found your neck, sucking and nipping the sensitive skin there. Seconds later, your ability to breathe was completely stolen when he placed a hand on your chin and made you face him.

“Sugu—” you began to say, worried that the pain pills were clouding his judgment.

You were enjoying this moment, yes, but a part of you felt that you were taking advantage of his vulnerable state, even if he was the one initiating everything.

He shushed you again, and then, he kissed you for the second time that night. A hand slipping into your hair, he placed his lower lip between yours. He swept the tip of his tongue over your lower lip and tugged you closer, a groan of approval leaving when you responded, giving you a confident boast. Your reservations fading away, you slipped some of your tongue into his mouth, carefully stroking it against his. 

Maybe, this wasn’t a medication-induced attraction. Instead, the pills might’ve removed any uncertainties that prevented him from acting on his want earlier. Or perhaps, his encounter with the curse gave him some much-needed clarity.

Whatever the reason, excitement and anxiety started to build in you as this kiss continued. On one hand, that moment was the stuff of many lewd fantasies. On the other, it was all overwhelmingly sudden, and you hadn’t a clue how to handle it.

And still, a little voice in the back of your head wondered how much the medication was influencing his lust.

His teeth grazed over your bottom lip, nipping it before pulling away, leaving you breathless. He smirked, his eyes darting to your swollen lips.

“Thank you for taking care of me,” he rasped out, the hand still present on your stomach creeping a little lower. “Sweet dreams, Angel.”

Yep, his voice was definitely slurring.

Guilt started to enter you, and the kiss became a lot less romantic at the prospect of it occurring in a drug-induced haze. But that would explain why after weeks of being the biggest tease alive, he’d been steps away from ravishing you.

Okay, that might’ve been an exaggeration, but it was still the most intimate the two of you had ever been.

The hand crept to your lower abdomen, leaving chills in its wake. And though you tried to ignore it, an ache started to form between your legs.

Curse him for keeping you horny.

By that time, Suguru’s eyes had shut, and his breathing had started to even out, preventing you from expressing your want for him. But that might’ve been a blessing in disguise, as you didn’t know if he’d even remember this in the morning. As it was, it was going to be hard explaining what happened if come morning, his memory had faltered. If the two of you went all the way, that task would be even more challenging. So, you just nuzzled into him and closed your eyes, hoping to fall asleep despite your pounding heart. As you drifted off, a single thought was on your mind.

You forgot to deal with the leaves on the bathroom floor.

Chapter Text

The incessant buzzing of Suguru's alarm clock rudely interrupted his peaceful slumber, jolting him awake. Groggily, he slowly opened his eyes and let out a deep yawn, stretching his tired limbs. With a half-hearted swing of his arm, he reached behind him and clumsily knocked the clock off the nightstand, finally silencing its obnoxious noise. If he'd have to buy a new one, so be it. A loud bang reverberated through the room as the alarm hit the hard wooden floors, the sound resonating with a sense of finality. It'd be a small miracle if the old clock wasn't broken beyond repair.

Oh well. It shouldn’t have been so loud.

It was a childish and impulsive action, he knew. After all, Suguru had a myriad of responsibilities weighing on his shoulders. But at that moment, he simply didn't feel like dealing with any of his cult leaderly duties. The warmth of his bed cocooned him, inviting him to linger a little longer in its comforting embrace. And then there was the blissful sensation of having you in his arms, pressed against his chest like a precious human teddy bear. The sheer contentment he felt at that moment was intoxicating. Under current circumstances, Suguru could easily be swayed to never leave the bed again.

“Suguru?” you mumbled sleepily.

The noise must’ve awakened. Another strike against the damaged clock.

“Go back to sleep,” he grumbled, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

He inhaled deeply, a shuddering sigh leaving him as your scent filled his nostrils. He loved the way you smelled, and the intimate position you two were in allowed him to get a thorough whiff of you.

An adorable little squeak left you as he pulled you closer to him, wanting to close the tiny gap that remained between the two of you.

“Sleep,” he repeated, your closeness quickly lulling him back to sleep.

Except, just as he was drifting back into dreamland, you squirmed away. Or, tried to, as his tight hold didn’t allow for much leeway.

“What did I just say?” he grumbled, his irritation bleeding through. “Stay still and go back to sleep.”

He tightened his hold on you to punctuate his point, refusing to allow you the space you wanted. Since you joined him in his bed, he’d slept better than he had in ages. And the closer you two grew, the more satisfying each night’s rest became.

“Suguru…” you trailed off, your coy tone making him crack an eye open.

You were obviously flustered, and your breathing was more labored than it should be. His eyes fell to your parted lips, and he licked his own as he remembered how it felt to finally kiss you. The painkillers and his tiredness made the lead-up hazy, but he remembered the feel of your lips in great detail.

“Yes?” he murmured, running a hand through your hair.

He loved the way it felt, even when it wasn’t styled to perfection.

“It’s…it’s…it’s pressing against me.”

Once you stammered out your words, you averted your gaze, your flush deepening.

“What is?”

“It is.”

Taking in a breath, you pushed your hips back, grinding your ass against his…oh.

“Izumi,” he breathed, his dick jumping as you wiggled against him. “You could’ve just said what ‘it’ was.”

“Showing is better than telling,” you said.

The corners of his lips turned up. The more comfortable you grew, the more sass you spewed, and he adored it. He loved seeing your growth, and pride surged through him knowing that he was the cause of it.

“If you wanted to feel ‘it’, all you had to do was tell me. If you want, I can take it out and—”

You squeak put an end to his teasing. Well, he wasn’t actually teasing, because if you said yes, he’d follow through with his words.

“I thought you were tired!” you protested, the whine in your voice only broadening his grin.

“I can ignore it for you, Izumi,” he said, rubbing the top of your head.

“I…let’s just sleep.”

“As you wish.”

Gradually, you started to relax against him, even with his morning wood pressing against the swell of your ass. The sensation only made him harder, and he contemplated slipping out of bed to rid himself of the erection. But, as your breathing began to level out and your body sagged in his hold, he decided he could ignore it. He didn’t want to disturb you just to satisfy his carnal desires, and you in his arms was more satisfying than jerking off could ever be. So, he decided to show some self-restraint and go back to sleep, a smile on his face as he drifted back into oblivion.

******

Hours later, he was forced to rouse from sleep again when Manami took it upon herself to cheek on him. Fortunately, you were still asleep, so her presence didn’t spark your jealousy. He enjoyed seeing how possessive you were over him and found how temperamental you got adorable. Yet, his tussle with the curse had him sore, and the painkillers you gave him were stronger than expected, leaving him too exhausted to deal with even a drop of drama. So, he sent his assistant on her way—after requesting two cups of his morning tea—cursing her when the slamming door woke you up.

You blinked, then looked at him with a sleepy smile. “You’re awake.”

He rubbed his temples, a headache a lingering side effect of yesterday’s incident. “Unfortunately.”

You frowned and sat up, scanning his form. Concern marred your features, and your gaze lasered in on his little temple massage. “What do you mean, unfortunately?”

At that moment, a genius idea came to Suguru. The memory of your tenderness as you cared for his battered body had him feeling warm inside, dare he say flustered. It was a feeling few women had ever inspired, as he used most for pleasure, not companionship. But remembering how sweetly you fretted over him, how you went out of your way to tend to him…he wanted more of that. Since he became a sorcerer, he was the protector, the one who cared for others, and never the other way around.

Perhaps, he could exaggerate his symptoms, to receive that kind of treatment a second day.

Even with Satoru, the person he still considered dearest to him and the strongest sorcerer of the modern age, he was the attentive one. Suguru’s best friend could be a man-child at times, one that needed an amount of affection and attention one wouldn’t expect from someone so powerful.

Moreover, he hadn’t had a break since he’d taken hold of the Star Globe Cult, and his defection from Jujutsu Tech meant a proper moment of peace hadn’t been had in months. In the back of his mind, he knew that he was still being hunted. Satoru would be the only one who could take him out, but you and the girls were far more vulnerable. Thoughts of what they’d do to you three kept him worried, and—

“Suguru!” you cried as he slumped against you, his head returning to the crook of your neck.

Throughout his inner monologue, his body had grown displeased with sitting up and decided your smaller former would be a great headrest. He hadn’t even realized he closed his eyes until your voice made them shoot open.

Huh, maybe he truly had come down with something.

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly as he sat up, taking his lapse in consciousness as a sign that his idea was a solid one. “I just feel like shit.”

He tried to limit his use of profanity in your presence, because even though you were his age, you had an innocence that he wanted to protect. But, seeing that he was ‘sick’, he had no reason to censor his speech.

Your eyes widened, and the panic that entered them almost made him feel bad.

Almost.

"I-Is there anything I can do to help you feel better, Suguru?” you asked, placing the back of your hand on his forehead to check his temperature. The results must’ve alleviated some of your concerns, because you relaxed a little. “I don't want you to suffer."

You were such a sweet thing. It was so endearing, especially after spending years around brutal snakes that only cared about themselves. However, that sweetness, combined with your naivete, made you vulnerable to people like Suguru, who fully intended to use both to his advantage.

Your innocent question presented an opportunity that he’d be dumb to pass up. Painting a bashful expression onto his face, he faked a sniffle. A more experienced person might’ve seen through his act, but you bought it without question.

“Manami is fetching us some tea,” he revealed, forcing his voice to be hoarse and biting back a grin when you stiffened. “But…oh, never mind.”

The last time he’d been sick was in middle school, and his mother had fussed over her only child as if he was on his deathbed. She used a combination of over-the-counter medication and homemade remedies. One such remedy was VapoRub, with drops of lavender and eucalyptus oil to relieve congestion. It worked like a charm, and within days, he was back to normal. However, it wasn’t the contents that he was currently interested in, but rather the application method. The ointment was slathered all over his bare chest, and the thought of your soft hands on his body nearly sent him into a frenzy.

The kisses last night left him longing for more, and he believed that a chest massage was the perfect next step.

“Tell me,” you said softly, placing a hand on his arm, drawing circles on his bicep. “I want to help you.”

His heart started to beat a little bit faster, the pinkening of his cheeks aiding his act, even if the extra color wasn’t due to sickness.

“Well…when I was a boy, my mother would use this ointment when I was sick,” he began, sagging into your touch. “VapoRub, lavender, and eucalyptus oil to relieve congestion, rubbed on my chest.” He paused and averted his gaze, pretending to be sheepish. “Would you mind?”

He could see you growing flustered by the request, and after a moment of silence, you nodded. “Okay. I’ll…” you trailed off, then cleared your throat, your expression coy. “I’ll go get the stuff.”

Suguru would bet money that despite your shy demeanor, the thoughts in your head were anything but pure.

You threw the covers aside and exited the bed, making your way to the bathroom. He admired your ass, your shorts too small to cover the entirety of your cheeks, something he counted as a blessing. While you were gone, he removed his shirt. When you returned with the mixture in hand, you froze, your eyes glued to his scarred chest. You stared for a moment, and once you realized what you were doing, a little embarrassed squeak left you and you rushed to his side. Setting the bowl on the bedside table, you sat next to him.

“I hope I made it correctly,” you said as you scooped some of the ointment into your hands.

You rubbed your palms together, then applied the mixture onto his chest. His breath hitched.

“It feels correct,” he murmured.

He closed his eyes, resting his head against the headboard and focusing on your touch. The concoction had a pleasant tingle, and the scent that soothed his senses, but the feeling of you rubbing it into his skin was his primary focus.

“It feels really correct,” he continued, letting out a small sigh as you moved your hand in a circular motion, making sure to slather the mixture all over his chest. “It feels great.”

So great, that his dick began to rise, because of course it did. You were wearing a tank top and boy shorts—your go-to for sleepwear—and moving your hands all along his body. The way you were positioned allowed him to peek at the tops of your breasts and admire their gentle sway as you rubbed him down. It was a recipe for a hard-on.

“Is it helping?” you asked.

He nodded. “Very much so.”

You smiled, unaware of what you were doing to him. “I’m glad.”

From time to time, Suguru wondered if you were truly so naïve, so blind to the effect you had on him. Then, he remembered you were locked in a cage by a village of monkeys, where you spent a decade of your life, and any doubts he had about your genuineness disappeared.

A breathy moan left him as you began to rub the ointment over his pecs, the tips of your fingers brushing over his nipples. You froze.

“Did that hurt?”

He shook his head. “No, quite the opposite. Keep going.”

You complied without question, and this time, he bit his lip to muffle any lewd noises that wanted to escape him. His body couldn’t help but respond to your touch, his erection and pebbled nipples were evidence of that.

He was content to spend the rest of his day like this, so when Manami burst into the room with his requested tea, he couldn’t help but glower at her when you quickly retracted your hands.

“Geto-Sama, I have—Oh!”

She stopped in her tracks at the scene before her, her eyes darting between you and him. Suguru forced himself to smile at her.

“Thank you, Manami, you can place it on the coffee table.”

She bowed and exited the room, though he didn’t miss the stink eye she threw your way. He sighed, knowing he was going to have a chat with his assistant about her feelings toward you. That could wait for another time, though.

“What did she want?” you questioned, your hostility audible.

He should talk to you about your jealousy towards other women, but that could also wait. Moreover, he enjoyed your possessiveness, and he knew he’d be far worse if another man was vying for your attention.

You were his, after all.

“I had her bring tea for us,” he explained, grabbing his shirt, and tugging it back over his head.

You stood from the bed, looking at the remaining ointment forlornly. It seemed you’d been enjoying rubbing him down, too.

“Do you feel better?” you asked as you trailed behind him.

He settled onto the couch, grabbing you to pull you close. You didn’t protest and leaned into him as you picked up your tea.

“Yep,” he said with a small smirk, picking up his own cup and taking a sip of the herbal brew. “Much.”

******

Hours later, you and Suguru were settled on the couch, cuddled under a blanket due to his insistence, watching a movie of his choosing. It was enjoyable, and you were shifting in anticipation as the tension built between the two main characters.

“Keep still,” he ordered when you started to fidget with the blanket, leaving it skewed.

“Sorry,” you muttered sheepishly. “I can get another blanket if it’s—”

“No,” he said without a second thought, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I want us to share.”

You nodded and tried to refocus on the movie. You’d missed what the characters had been saying, and the next scene featured a character you weren’t fond of, so you quickly became disengaged. The movie having lost your interest, your mind started to shift back to Suguru. The entire day, he’d been so…clingy. It was a word you never thought could be used to describe Suguru, but you didn’t mind in the slightest. You liked him being needy and demanding your care and attention. More than that, you liked being useful to him, liked being an asset to him rather than a burden. As bad as it sounded, you were enjoying him feeling unwell.

During the movie, you find yourself stealing glances at him, unable to resist. The kiss from the night before kept replaying in your mind, causing you to wonder if it still lingered in his memory or if the pain medication had erased it completely. That moment had been completely spontaneous and likely wouldn't have occurred if Suguru hadn't been under the influence.

As the movie progressed, a particularly passionate kissing scene appeared on the screen, causing your heart to race. A rush of emotions and memories overwhelmed you, the scene on screen almost mirroring your intense moment with Suguru. Once again, you glanced at him, trying to decipher his reaction. He seemed completely absorbed in the movie, showing no signs of the internal conflict you were experiencing. Your longing and anticipation grew stronger, hoping that he too was reliving that unforgettable kiss. It may not have been a scene straight out of one of your mother's romance novels, but it was perfect for you, nonetheless.

If only you could determine if he still remembered it.

As the tension from the on-screen kiss lingered, you couldn’t contain yourself any longer.

“Suguru…do you remember last night?” you asked, your voice soft and unsure, your heart pounding wildly.

He turned to you. Had you not been so caught up in your emotions, you might’ve noticed the mischievous glint in his eyes and the sly smirk on his lips. But your gaze was glued to your lap, and his expression disappeared as quickly as it came.

After seconds of silence ticked by, you finally looked at him, only to find him looking at you with furrowed brows.

 "Remember what, exactly?"

His reply made your heart sink a little. You huffed out a breath as disappointment washed over you, and a pout formed on your lips when frustration began to creep in. You had hoped he would acknowledge your kiss, perhaps even hint at how much he had enjoyed it as much as you had. Ideally, the kiss would've been a turning point, but that would be impossible if it had fled from his mind.

You opened your mouth to inform him what happened, then quickly shut it. What if his attraction to you had been the result of the medication, or he thought less of you for responding to his advances when he was under the influence?

“Nothing,” you grumbled after a moment of silence, though your face remained sour.

Seeing your pout, Suguru's face softened, and he reached out to gently tilt your chin up towards him.

"Hey, don't be like that," he said softly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“What—”

You were caught off guard when he placed a hand on your cheek and kissed you, silencing your words with his lips. A surprised squeak escaped before you could stop it. For a moment you didn't know how to respond, taken aback by his unexpected action. However, your shock began to melt away as the gentle kiss continued. Feeling bold, you decided to lean into him and move your mouth against his. He groaned against your lips, tugging you closer.

The kiss was soft and sweet, and as you held each other, you felt a rush of warmth blossom in your chest that spread through your entire body. Lost in the moment, all other thoughts faded away, leaving only the comforting intimacy you two were sharing.

After several blissful moments, he pulled away, staring deep into your eyes with a smile on his face. “Of course, I remember. I wasn’t that drugged up.”

You pursed your lips. “That was mean.”

Smiling, he leaned forward and brushed his lips over yours again, before peppering kisses all over your voice, pulling a string of giggles from you.

“Am I forgiven?” he asked between kisses.

“Yes,” you said, quickly recapturing his lips, needing to feel them against yours.

You were quickly becoming addicted to kissing him, and indescribable joy began to take hold at being able to freely express your affection for him. You knew kisses didn’t equal a relationship, and that this new territory would warrant a discussion. As necessary as it was, the thought filled you with nerves, and a part of you feared that the inevitable conversation would reveal that he’s just attracted to you, but uninterested in a relationship. Yet, as scary as that thought was, you managed to push it out of your head and focus on the contentment you felt.

Maybe you were paranoid, but something told you that serenity wouldn’t last long, urging you to cast aside doubts and cherish that intimate moment.

Chapter Text

One of the worst parts about being a woman was the monthly hell your body experienced, known as menstruation. Some claim it’s a ‘beautiful thing,’ but you felt there was nothing beautiful about the havoc your uterus wreaked upon you. As if blood gushing out of you wasn’t bad enough, during this time, women often experience crippling cramps, a painful amount of bloating, cravings that’d ruin any diet you’re on, dizzying mood swings, sore breasts that ache when hit with air, and many more bothersome symptoms.

For a long time, your periods went away due to your subpar—hellish—living conditions. But with your body healing from its decade in Kuroki, that meant the return of your menstrual cycle. Fortunately, you were done bleeding for the month. Unfortunately, that meant you had to worry about another aspect of periods, staying stocked on supplies. Suguru had done an excellent job of getting what you need, but you didn’t want out of anything and be put in a bind. And you’d been wanting a heating pad after you saw one in a catalog, something that wasn’t present in the temple. Thus, a trip into town was due.

Moreover, Takara wanted to take Mimiko and Nanako shopping, and after Nanako broke her arm in the nanny’s care, you were leery to let them leave the temple with her. No further incidents had happened, and the girls seemed to really like her, but that didn’t take away your mistrust. So, you used your want for a heating pad as an excuse to join them, resulting in you standing in a mall candy store as the girls excitedly browsed the selections. You’d picked out some sweets for yourself, but your appetite for candy was far smaller than the girl’s. You and Suguru would have to ration out the candy, so they wouldn’t get too hyper.

Speaking of Suguru, he had yet to leave your mind. His sudden illness had cleared up, allowing him to get back to his regular duties. His primary goal for today was meeting with his benefactors, preventing you from being at his side. Spending time with the girls allowed you to distract yourself from how much you missed him.

A smile made its way onto your lips as you thought about him. You should’ve seen his injury and illness as a bad thing, but what transpired during that time made you see it as a positive. Not only could you finally be useful to him, but you received the confirmation you’d been longing, in the form of a kiss and sweet words. Three days had passed since your lips first touched, but you’d come to expect a kiss when you first woke up, after you two got ready for the day, and right before you went to sleep. Heated kisses and handsy cuddles was the extent of your physical relationship with Suguru, but it was just enough.

For the time being, anyway. Perhaps when you got more comfortable, he’d make some of your wet dreams a reality.

"What are you smiling about?" Takara asked when she noticed the grin on your face, the corners of her lips turning up in amusement.

Your smile faltered a little at her question. Not only did you not fully trust her, but you hadn’t a clue how to explain your relationship with Suguru. Were you two a couple now? The two of you certainly weren’t just ward and protector, nor were you just friends. Yet, intimacy didn’t equal a relationship. If you were being technical, you’d been intimate with Kai, but you wouldn’t say you dated him.

No, scratch that. Being intimate with someone implies it was consensual, and Kai hadn’t given you a choice in the matter.

“Ma’am?” Takara prompted after moments of silence dragged on.

You wondered if Suguru saw a future for the two of you beyond what you currently shared, or if he was contemplating your new status. Knowing him, he’d already decided on how to proceed, not a single doubt in his mind. His confidence was enviable.

Takara’s small smile became a frown, and she sighed heavily. You blinked, suddenly reminded of her question.

“N-nothing,” you stammered out, internally cringing at how awkward you sounded. So, you cleared your throat and fixed your posture.

For the time being, you decided to focus on the present and cherish the moments you had with Suguru, instead of stressing yourself out over labels. After all, who knew what the future held? 

“It isn’t important, so don’t worry about it,” you finally said, which Takara only nodded to.

The girls saved you from further awkwardness when they came running to you two. You turned to them with a smile, only for it to filter when you saw how upset they looked. Mimiko had tears in her eyes, and Nanako wore a frown. Their crestfallen expressions immediately put you on high alert.

“What’s wrong?” Takara asked before you could.

The question earned more tears from Mimiko.

“He won’t let us get our gummy bears,” she wailed, her cries worsening Nanako’s pout. “We asked for them nicely, and—”

Takara held up a hand, her demeanor becoming sterner. “Did he have them first, girls?”

You raised a brow, slightly surprised at the authority in the timid nanny’s voice. However, you didn’t say anything, as her question was a valid one.

Sniffling, Mimiko nodded, then looked away sheepishly. Nanako wasn’t so keen on backing down, though.

“It doesn’t matter! That overgrown freak didn’t need five bags,” she fumed, the anger in her little voice taking you aback.

“Name calling isn’t nice, Nanako,” you chided, though you couldn’t keep the amusement out of your tone.

She stomped her little foot, a pout settling on her face. “But we wanted gummy bears!”

Her bratty behavior should’ve warranted another chiding, but you couldn’t help but find it adorable. Takara, however, didn’t find it so.

“It doesn’t matter, Nanako, he had them first,” she said sternly, frowning at the girls, then gesturing to the basket she held that was full of sweet treats. “And you have enough candy.”

Part of a nanny’s job was to guide the girls down the right path, so you wouldn’t say anything about her tone. Yet, the way Nanako’s bottom lip started to tremble did make your heartache, and you wanted nothing more than to comfort the twins, even if they were in the wrong. You resisted, as you didn’t want the girls to become more spoiled than they already were.

“Let’s go check out,” you said as the girls engaged in a sulky stare-off with their nanny.

Takara grabbed their hands before they could protest, dragging them to the lone cashier. The only person ahead of you four was a guy who looked to be about your age. He was the tallest person you’d ever seen, with white hair and bright blue eyes, his sunglasses doing little to dull their vibrancy. When he flashed you and Takara a smile as the cashier scanned his many selections, your heart couldn’t help but flutter. Judging by her soft giggle, she wasn’t immune to his good looks, either.

No one could ever compare with Suguru, but you’d be lying if you said the stranger wasn’t a looker. He was pretty, a word you didn’t usually associate with men. Whereas Suguru was the definition of masculine beauty, the white-haired stranger was the textbook example of a pretty boy.

When his cobalt gaze drifted downward, his smile faded as the twins came into view. He looked between you and Takara with narrowed eyes, his friendly air gone.

“Which one of you do these brats belong to?” he asked, condescension beneath his playful tone.

“We’re not brats!” Nanako exclaimed before you could come to her defense. “You’re just rude and greedy.”

It didn’t take a genius for you to figure out that this was the stranger who took their precious gummy bears, earning their ire.

He gasped dramatically. “That’s no way to speak to your elders, you little shi—”

“Don’t talk to them like that,” you snapped, stepping in front of the girls to protect them from his glower. “Act like the adult you claim to be and stop arguing with children.”  

His size and gender—though he could control neither—intimidated you, but you wouldn’t let your little sisters be disparaged by a salty adult. Worse came to worse, security would intervene before things got out of hand.

He guffawed as the cashier finally finished scanning his items. “Oh, so they’re yours.”

The cashier, who had a bored look on their face despite the exchange, finally finished scanning his items. He pulled out a black card and paid. Before he went on his way, he rummaged in his bag and pulled out a large bag of gummy bears, tossing it to you. You managed to catch it and looked at him with wide eyes. He just smirked.

“Consider that a peace offering.”

With that, he walked out of the store. You and Takara exchanged a glance, before you handed the bag to the girls, who calmed down at the sight of the candy. You set the basket full of candy on the counter, bewildered by the strange encounter.

As the cashier started to scan your selections, Takara asked, “Would it be inappropriate to ask for his number?”

The scowl you sent her way was a clear answer and had her shutting her mouth.

******

An hour later, the four of you had made your way to the bustling food court. The day’s unexpected shopping spree had left you all with a ravenous appetite that needed to be satisfied. Takara had taken the girls to get the chicken nuggets they’d been begging for, while you craved a steaming ramen bowl. As you patiently stood in line, the noise surrounding you became overwhelming. You discreetly fiddled with the hem of your top, desperately trying to maintain your composure amidst the chaotic crowd.

Crowded places had never been your cup of tea, and years of isolation had only worsened your aversion to social settings. Where you once just be antsy, it took all your willpower not to bolt to a quiet corner.

“Next!” the man behind the counter announced, signaling the completion of another order.

In front of you were three men, slightly older than you, engaged in animated conversation and dressed in sharp business attire. Once they got their food, you’d finally be able to order. The tantalizing aromas emanating from the food stall made your mouth water, intensifying your anticipation. Your stomach growled impatiently. The sound of your hunger must've been louder than you thought, because one of the men turned around with a cocked brow.

You involuntarily froze, and he responded with a friendly smile.

“You can go ahead of us. We have quite a big order,” he graciously offered, gesturing to his friends to acknowledge the agreement.

However, your appetite had suddenly vanished, overwhelmed by the flood of memories triggered by the uncanny resemblance between this stranger's face and that of your tormentor. Despite knowing that he couldn't possibly be Kai—too tall, too old, too clean-cut, too alive—distressing memories still came back, causing your chest to constrict and your breathing to become labored as panic took hold.

You chanted in your mind, “He’s not him,” over and over again, though it did little good to calm you.

"Uhm, I-I’m fine," you stammered, mustering a forced smile as you stepped back, bumping into another customer in the process.

Uttering a quick apology without making eye contact, you hastily abandoned your place in the line, ignoring the curious glances cast in your direction.

The noise, piercing and relentless, began to resonate in your head, echoing the rhythm of a throbbing ache. This sensory onslaught initiated a dizzying descent into a whirlpool of raw, unfiltered emotions.  The sight of the look-alike unlocked the memories you had struggled to suppress, causing the dam that held back your traumatic past to crumble, threatening to drown you in its wake. Each memory was a vivid flashback, a haunting echo of the past that quickly unraveled the fabric of your composure. Suddenly, you were back in Kuroki, back in the clutches of Kai. Every moment of the past became a present reality, and the walls of resilience you had so painstakingly built around yourself seemed to fall apart.

So lost in your panic, you failed to notice Takara and the twins approaching you, until the nanny placed a hand on your shoulder. A small scream left you, drawing even more attention and making Nanako drop a nugget. Embarrassment swarmed you.

“My nugget!” Nanako cried, just as Mimiko and Takara asked, “What’s wrong?”

Their voices jumbled together, doing nothing to help your anxiety. All you could do was shake your head, unable to get ahold of yourself despite your mind screaming to do so.

“Girls, why don’t we go to the bathroom real quick? Takara asked, grabbing Nanako’s nuggets and placing them back in the bag.

Nanako opened her mouth to protest, but one slap to the back of the head from Mimiko as the child pointed at you had her shutting up.

“Okay,” she agreed solemnly, looking longingly at the brown bag that held the food.

Takara grabbed your and Mimiko’s hand, who held onto Nanako, then started to tug you all in the direction of the bathroom. The noise quieted down the further away from the food court you got, returning a semblance of sanity to you.

Once the four of you were in the bathroom, Mimiko said, “I have to pee,” and led Nanako to a stall, leaving you and Takara alone by the sinks.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, shame creeping into you at your behavior.

You thought you had moved on from the haunting memories of Kuroki, the place where your innocence got snatched away and replaced with a harsh reality full of pain. You thought you had armored yourself with strength, enough to face the lingering trauma that stemmed from your time in the village. The abuse you suffered at the hands of Kai, the very name still carrying an echo of pain, had left deep scars on your psyche. But foolishly—until now—you believed you had healed, that you had patched up the pieces of your broken self with determination and resilience.

How stupid of you. If that was truly the case, you wouldn’t be having a panic attack in a mall bathroom.

“You need to breathe,” Takara directed, clutching your hands in hers. She took a deep breath, then released it. “Breath with me.”  

Her words brought back what Suguru said all those weeks ago, back when he was a stranger whom you were forced to hide in dingy motel rooms with. At the time, his unknown intentions filled you with wariness. Now, the mere thought of him put you at ease, allowing you to follow Takara’s direction and gradually calm down.

You were so thankful the bathroom was deserted; otherwise, this moment would be ten times worse. Though you didn’t want to admit it, you felt a twinge of gratitude that Takara had located a bathroom tucked away in a quieter corner of the mall.

Takara took another deep breath, held it, released it, and repeated the process. When you’d first been introduced to the breathing exercise, you were hesitant to try it. But knowing how effective it was had you quickly mimicking her. Gradually, everything began to return to normal. The space around you didn’t feel so suffocating, your heart didn’t pound so rapidly, and it was no longer a struggle to breathe.

“What happened?” she asked after seconds of silence passed.

Your moment of weakness had you averting your gaze, and you longed for the ground to open and swallow you. 

“I thought…never mind.”

She let go of your hands and took a step back. “I know you aren’t particularly fond of me, ma’am, but know it’s safe for you to confide in me.”

“Why?” you asked quietly.

The only extensive interaction you had with her ended with your shadow attacking her. Even if surface-level respect was expected, she had no reason to treat you with kindness. The only things she had to do were take good care of the twins and show no insolence. Playing an impromptu therapist was nowhere on the list of requirements.

“Do I need a reason to not want someone to suffer?”

“Who said I’m suffering?” you snapped, the truth of her words making you indignant.

Sure, your day-to-day life was no longer filled with suffering. However, at that moment, saying you were suffering was a very accurate assessment.

 Denying the obvious had Takara rolling her eyes, something you were too tired to address. “It doesn’t seem like you’re doing too well right now, and I like to help people. Is that a better answer, ma’am?”

“…The sarcasm is unnecessary.”

“It isn’t sarcasm, it’s a rewording and the truth. No one should have to suffer alone, not even you.”

You were caught off guard by her words, and her brutal honesty left you speechless. It was undeniable that you were going through it right now, and in a cruel twist of fate, you felt the stinging rawness of old wounds as if they were fresh in a too-bright bathroom reeking with chemicals.  

After a moment of silence that just hung in the air, you mustered up the courage to speak again. "I saw someone... someone who looked a lot like Kai," you confessed, the words slipping out of your mouth in a quiet, barely audible whisper.

Just the name tasted bitter on your tongue.

Her brows furrowed, confusion entering her eyes, reminding you she hadn’t a clue about your past. The most that the temple staff knew was that you were Suguru’s…something. The circumstances that brought you and him together were unknown, and you would’ve liked to keep it that way. However, panicking in a mall in front of the girl’s nanny threw a wrench in that plan.

Just then, Nanako and Mimiko exited the stall and headed over to you.

“Kai was a stupid bully that I’m happy died,” Nanako grumbled as they approached, revealing that their long stay in the stall was due to eavesdropping. “He would always hurt Izumi and try to starve us, and—”

“That’s enough, Nanako,” you said through gritted teeth.

There we no lies in her words, but they only rubbed salt in a reopened wound. You considered it a small miracle that no one else was around to witness this exchange.

Mimiko glowered at her as they stood on their tiptoes to wash their hands. “You weren’t supposed to say anything!”

Nanako just shrugged and focused on the water running from the faucets, ignoring her sister’s glare.

Takara’s expression softened at the little girl’s explanation, a glimmer of understanding in her eyes. "I can only imagine how hard that must've been for you.”

Hard was an understatement. It felt like you got forcefully thrown back in time, trapped in a nightmare that you thought you had escaped long ago. It made you feel weak, that something as minor as seeing a lookalike could send you spiraling, and that ignited a familiar feeling of self-hatred. You’d thought yourself to be far stronger than the helpless person you used to be, but today’s events had you questioning that notion.

“Whatever happened with Kai will always be a part of you, ma’am,” Takara said quietly, looking at the floor. Before you could interrupt her for saying such a thing, she continued. “But you’re more than your past.”

You barked out a humorless laugh, the sound echoing in the bathroom room. “And how would you know?”

A heartbeat of silence passed, and then a sniffle sounded, breaking the stillness. Your eyes widened when you realized it came from Takara.

“My siblings and I went to live with my grandparents because my father was a perverted monster, and my mother was too weak to stop him," she confessed, her voice trembling. She looked up at you, your heart sinking when you saw her teary eyes. “It took a while to get past that, and I wouldn’t have made it without my grandparents. But now that I am past it, I know that your past can’t dictate your future, and healing isn’t a straight path. You’re going to have setbacks, and that’s okay. It’s all a part of the process.”

Her words, spoken with candor about her own life's challenges, seemed to linger in the air. Guilt settled in at your previous remark and harsh treatment of her, but a kernel of appreciation for the woman before you began to take root. Takara’s message sank in, in a way you hadn't let yourself fully acknowledge before. Getting better wasn’t a case of 'once healed, always healed,’ but an ongoing process.

The notion was both discouraging and hopeful, but you decided to focus on the latter.

"Takara," you said, looking her in the eye. "Thank you. I really appreciate everything you've done."

Maybe the events of the day had you feeling more emotional than normal, but you saw her in a new light, as more than just a mediocre nanny. A strength you hadn’t noticed in her before seemed to shine through, and you couldn’t help but feel a connection to her through the shared experiences of pain and trauma. It wasn’t the best way to bond with someone, but it began to melt away at the resentment that’d been present since Nanako broke her arm.  

She gave you a small, reassuring smile. "You're welcome, ma'am.”

“Izumi,” you quickly corrected.

At the very least, she should be able to drop the formalities with you, a token of your gratitude for her assistance. Because of her advice, you were reminded that you’d grown, changed, and most importantly, survived.

Chapter Text

Once you returned to the temple, you left Takara to deal with the girls, wanting nothing more than to go to your room and unwind, ideally with Suguru close by. The universe must’ve heard your wish, because the moment you stepped into your quarters, Suguru’s arms were wrapped around you. You squeaked, your hold on your bags slipping. The few purchases you made earlier fell to the floor, but you barely paid attention to them as Suguru smothered you with kisses. His lips pressed against every inch of your face, making you giggle. A content sigh left you when his lips finally found yours.

“Missed you,” he mumbled against your mouth, before his lips descended to your neck.

You gasped as he suckled the skin there, his tongue darting out to lick. An ache began to form between your legs. His touch didn’t fill you with disgust as Kai’s had. Instead, it filled you with desire and left you wanting more. You closed your eyes and tilted your head back, granting his more access. His affection was a much-needed distraction and reaffirmed that he’d missed you as much as you did him.

He moaned in response, then pulled away. A whine of protest left you, but he shushed it as he scooped you into his arms.

“Patience, you needy woman,” he teased as he carried you to the bedroom, his words making you pout.

“I’m not needy!” you protested with faux indignation. “I just missed you.”

You’d only been separated for a few hours, but after days of spending every waking moment together, that time felt like an eternity.  A selfish, twisted part of you hoped that he’d get sick again, just so you could have more alone time with him.

He chuckled. “I never said that was a bad thing, baby. I happen to like my women needy.”

His words thoroughly flustered you, rendering you speechless. He grinned down at you in response, before sliding open the door and throwing you onto the mattress. You squeaked as you landed, and Suguru quickly silenced you with his lips, his body smothering yours. His hands ran up and down your thighs. Your hips rolled against his, his deep groan muffled by your mouth. You whimpered as his knee rubbed against your clit, and the ache only increased.

This was the furthest the two of you had gone, and the prospect of things growing even more heated had you overwhelmed, despite your desire. The pace that he was moving left your head spinning. If nothing else, you knew your hours-long absence affected him, too.

 His hands traveled back up, going to the front of your shirt. He made quick work of the buttons and pushed the fabric off your shoulders once they were undone. Your breath hitched as he threw it to the floor. You didn’t stop him as he removed your bra, his hungry eyes drinking at the sight of your bared breasts.

Excitement and anxiety surged through you.  You’d fantasized about a moment like this for so long, but at the same time, nerves and self-doubt stopped you from getting lost in the moment. The more you thought, the less electrifying Suguru’s touch became.

What if your body wasn’t good enough for him? What if you didn’t know what to do? What if your lack of consensual experience robbed him of enjoyment? What if….?

Suguru seemed to sense your hesitation, his mouth leaving you as he pulled away. The absence of his body pressed against yours caused you to shiver, and a small frown pulled at your lips. You kicked yourself for ruining the moment. When you tried to sit up, his hands traveled to your shoulder, keeping you in place.

Your breath hitched.

“Stop overthinking, sweetheart,” he whispered, his hands running up and down your bare arms. A thumb rolled a nipple around, making you whimper. “You’re beautiful.”

He kissed you then, leaving you pliant as you melted into him. The heat in your belly grew with each second, and you moaned when he palmed your breast, his other hand slipping beneath your skirt. You gasped as his fingers brushed the fabric covering your heat, before rubbing slow circles. He nipped at your neck as his fingers hooked under the crotch of your panties, pulling them aside and removing the barrier.  

You stiffened.

Instead of the pleasure you’d anticipated feeling, panic began to creep in. Everything was moving too fast, and after the earlier events of the day, it was too much to handle. Worse, the mall incident put Kai at the forefront of your mind.

Your heart hammered in your chest as Suguru continued to touch you. The feeling of his fingers on cunt no longer felt good; now they made your skin crawl. It was too reminiscent of how Kai used to touch you. Suguru was more skillful and gentler to him, but that wasn’t doing anything to soothe you.

 The rational side of your brain scrambled to provide comfort, and tried to explain that this wasn’t the same as when Kai had forced himself on you. This was a choice, and you could end it whenever you wanted, which your panicked mind was screaming at you to do. But the thought of doing so made you feel ashamed. Would Suguru see you as weak? Would he think you didn’t want him anymore? Would he think you’re selfish for denying him what he wanted?

Would he take you, anyway? You immediately struck the notion from your mind, because Suguru wouldn’t do that. He cared about you too much to violate you and betray your trust…right?

Your thoughts were becoming too much to handle. With a shaky voice, you called out to him, shoving at his chest. “Stop!”

He withdrew immediately, his eyes wide with shock. “Shit, are you alright? Did I do something wrong?”

You’d never seen him look so…panicked. You didn’t like it, and knowing that you were the cause of that expression worsened your haywire emotions.

You shook your head, unable to meet his gaze. “No, it’s not you.

Suguru frowned, his concern clear on his face. He sat up and cupped your face, his thumbs swiping at some stray tears on your damp cheeks. You hadn’t even realized you were crying.

“What’s wrong, Izumi?”

“It’s nothing,” you mumbled, averting your eyes.

“Izumi,” he said sternly, causing you to flinch. He cursed and softened his tone. “Please tell me.”

You sighed and rubbed the back of your neck. “I just…”

You paused, unsure of how to explain your sudden anxiety. His hands returned to your shoulders, holding you steady. You took a deep breath and looked up at him, his worried eyes meeting yours.

“Sorry,” you murmured.

He shook his head and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

“You don’t need to apologize,” he whispered, his thumbs rubbing circles into your skin. “Did I move too fast?”

You nodded, but didn’t verbally respond. Instead, you leaned forward and buried your face in his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you close.

“Can I ask you what happened?”

You shook your head, unable to form the words. Moreover, you were too ashamed to admit the truth. Kai’s cruel taunts of how you were, ‘damaged goods,’ or how no man besides him would ever want you echoed in your head, repeating in a bothersome chant that caused you to hyperventilate.

Suguru was quick to pull away, eyes wide as he examined you. You gasped for air, your throat feeling tight. You wanted to reassure him that it was okay, that you would be fine. But you couldn’t find the words, let alone the breath.

“Just breath, Izumi,” he encouraged, taking a deep breath in a bid for you to mimic him.

If only it was that easy. It’d worked earlier in the day, but the panic attack you’d experienced then paled in comparison to this one.

When he realized breathing techniques wouldn’t do the trick, he rushed out of the room, and the sound of running water came through the open doorway. He returned with a wet washcloth, dabbing your face with it first, then placing it on your neck. The cold cloth was soothing, and the feeling of Suguru rubbing your back helped you calm down.

It took several minutes for your breathing to return to normal, and when it did, you felt exhausted.

“I’m sorry,” you croaked, a fresh batch of tears forming.

“I already told you, you don’t need to apologize,” he said, swiping your tears away with one hand, and continuing to rub circles onto your back with the other. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

You shook your head. There wasn’t anything anyone could do to erase the abuse you’d endured. You just needed to learn how to cope with it and move on. Unfortunately, today was proving that healing was easier said than done. Less than twenty minutes ago, you’d been thanking the universe for Suguru’s immediate nearness. Now, you were cursing it for reminding you how weak you were. Once was more than enough, and twice in one day was just overkill.

“Would you be willing to tell me what happened?” Suguru asked after several minutes of silence passed.

You took a shaky breath and looked up at him, tossing the cloth aside. “It’s…a long story.”

He looked at you expectantly, but when you kept quiet, he signed. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I’m here to listen.”

“I just…” You swallowed thickly, your throat dry. “Can we just drop it? I’m tired.”

He kissed the top of your head. “Of course. Just know that I’m here for you, no matter what.”

His words allowed you to muster up a smile, and you leaned against him. After that, the two of you went silent, but the stillness of the space was far from comfortable. The tension in the air was palpable, and neither of you seemed to know what to say. Finally, the quiet was broken by Suguru.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you like that.”

You shook your head, desperate for Suguru to know he wasn’t to blame. “It’s not your fault. I should’ve told you to slow down.”

If you weren’t a coward, you’d confide in him, and share exactly why you panicked. But you didn’t want him to think less of you if he knew the truth of your past, preventing you from opening up.

He pressed a kiss to your forehead, before pulling away and standing from the bed. His wordless departure made your heart sink, and you wondered if you made him too uncomfortable to be in your presence. Just the thought nearly had you spiraling again. But before panic gripped you yet again, he returned to the room, carrying your fallen bags.

You breathed a small sigh of relief, though annoyance swamped you, the emotion directed at yourself. What just happened should’ve reinforced that Suguru truly cared for you, but instead, you were too…something to think he’d want someone like you.

Maybe, you truly were damaged goods.

You were startled out of your thoughts by the rustling of plastic. You looked over and saw Suguru rifling through one of the fallen bags. Your eyes widened when he pulled out a short, lacy babydoll nightgown. You’d bought it with the intention of surprising Suguru, a more seductive alternative to your usual tank top and sleep shorts. At the time, it seemed like a great idea. Now, you felt silly for even buying the thing. Your cheeks burned, and you looked away, the bedspread suddenly incredibly interesting.

Suguru cleared his throat, recapturing your attention. He stared at you with a cocked brow. “What are you doing with something like this?”

“It’s not important,” you mumbled, crossing your arms.

His brow furrowed, and he moved to sit beside you, the babydoll still in his grasp. The mattress dipped under his weight, and you scooted over, not wanting to be too close. He reached out to touch you. You shrank back, an instinctual habit you thought had disappeared.

But alas, it was still present and chose the worst time to make itself known.

“Shit,” he mumbled. Concern swirled in the dark depths of his eyes, but you didn’t miss the frustration that lay beneath the surface, making you feel even worse. “I’m sorry, Izumi, I didn’t mean—”

“It’s fine,” you replied quietly, knowing he had no intention of harming you.

He scooted away, placing his hands in his lap. You frowned. The last thing you wanted was for him to distance himself from you. Your talk with Takara replayed in your head. Healing wasn’t a linear thing, and you’d have hiccups. The most important thing was preserving, no matter what. With that in mind, an idea struck you, one that you acted on before you lost your nerve. In a spur-of-the-moment decision, you took the lingerie from him and stood.

He watched you curiously, and your cheeks burned as you slipped off your clothes and replaced them with the skimpy garment. It clung to your curves, and the lacy material felt like a second skin. You were tempted to cover yourself, but instead, you stood tall and turned to Suguru.

You weren’t made of glass, unable to handle too much attention without breaking. Allowing your past to throw you into a pit of despair spat in the face of how far you’d come, and worst of all, would prove Kai right.

You’d rather die than let that happen.

Suguru's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. He stared at you with unabashed desire, and you couldn’t help but stand taller.

Slowly, he stood and approached, stopping just a few inches away. “You’re gorgeous, Izumi,” he whispered, his voice full of lustful admiration.

Your blush deepened, and a giggle bubbled up from your chest. The compliment was so genuine and sincere, warming you to the core.

He leaned closer, his nose nuzzling your cheek. “Can I kiss you?”

 You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I’d like that.”

With your permission granted, he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips. His hands hovered above your waist, his fingertips skimming the fabric of your babydoll. Your arms wrapped around his neck, and they remained there as he walked you back to the bed.

He laid you down, his body hovering over yours. His eyes roved over every inch of you, and the sight of his darkened gaze was intoxicating. Emboldened by his reaction and determined to show how much you wanted him, your hips bucked upward, your core grinding against his crouch. He hissed in response and jumped back. Your brows knit together.

Suguru sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Look, Izumi…I want you.” He let out a breathy laugh. “I want you more than you possibly know. But, we need to take things slow. We’re going to take things slow, Izumi. I don’t want a repeat of earlier to happen. I need to make sure you’re ready.”

“Going slow doesn’t mean doing nothing,” you protested, though you knew he was right.

Your emotions had been all over the place today, with seemingly nothing triggering an extreme reaction. At the very least, you should rest, and come clean to him tomorrow. Then, the two of you could give the fingering another shot. If luck was on your side, you’d orgasm and return the favor. However, good fortune wasn’t something you possessed, so it was unlikely that those events would play out as you imagined.

“It does mean not fucking dry-humping me,” he snapped, making you bristle.

“I won’t break if you touch me!”

A humorless laugh left him. “You just did.”

His words struck a chord. Sitting up with a jolt, a deep scowl formed as you stared at him. You hoped this display of anger would be enough to conceal the hurt coursing through you. He matched your expression and crossed his arms.

“You took things so far out of nowhere when all we’ve been doing is cuddling and kissing!” you snapped, a poor attempt at redirecting the blame onto him.

“You think I would’ve done that if I knew how’d you react?”

You lifted your chin, a small show of defiance. But in the back of your mind, you wondered how you managed to fuck up the day for everyone you knew.

Nope, scratch that, you had an answer. Some divine being had a personal vendetta against you and decided that you needed multiple reminders of your trauma. After managing to suppress it for so long, Kai’s abuse during your stay in Kuroki was flooding back, creating a miserable time for yourself and everyone around you.

“Going slow isn’t doing nothing,” you repeated. “So don’t make me feel bad for wanting us to try again.”

“You shouldn’t feel bad, but you should know your boundaries,” he said sternly. “What I want to do to you? You aren’t ready for it, so stop pushing, damnit!”

You could hear his frustration, and the tension in his stance had slivers of guilt coursing through you. You didn’t want to stress him out, but you also didn’t want to back down. Right now, the annoyance you felt was a welcomed emotion. It wasn’t directed at yourself, and it allowed you to feel something other than the stress and anxiety you’d been dealing with all day.

“What do you want to do?”

Instead of giving you a detailed answer, he just said, “Things I know you aren’t ready for, Izumi.”

“You can’t say I’m not ready for something you won’t even tell me about!”

He just shrugged, unwilling to back down. “I’ll tell you what I like when you tell me what happened earlier.”

You went silent. You suppose it was fair, as you left him in the dark about something very major. Yet, that didn’t stop you from narrowing your eyes at him. The two of you glared at each other, the silence between you thick with tension. The sight of your discarded clothes on the floor was a painful reminder of how quickly things had gone south. You knew Suguru was right, but you didn’t want to admit it. It felt like giving in, allowing Kai’s memory to have more power over you.

But, as always, Suguru got his way.

“Fine,” you huffed, lying back down and crossing your arms.

You lay pouting for several moments. Soon, your anger started to fade, and tears welled in your eyes. You felt like a manic child, unable to control your emotions yet wanting your way. You hadn’t a clue what was wrong with you, no explanation as to why you were sensitive today. All you know is that after seeing the Kai lookalike, your mind has been all over the place.

Maybe, you should ask Suguru if the temple had a therapist. Then again, if it did, they’d likely report back to him, as all the staff was required to do. If that was the case, you might as well tell him yourself.

After another minute or two ticked by, Suguru sighed deeply, then crawled into bed with you.

As had become routine, he took you into his arms. You didn’t protest, nor did you complain when he kissed your tears away.  

“I’m sorry,” he said, kneading your lower back as he held you. “But we’re going to have to talk about this. You know that, right?”

“I know,” you mumbled, your face buried in his chest.

“…And we’re going to take things slow,” he continued, his tone leaving no room for arguments. “It’s for the best. If kisses and cuddling are all you can handle right now, that’s okay.”

You shook your head. “I want more.” A heartbeat of silence went by, and then you whispered, “And you want more, don’t you?”

If you couldn’t please him, he might seek release from someone else. Manami immediately came to mind, and just the thought caused your chest to ache. You didn’t know what you’d do if that happened.

“We’ll do more, eventually. But not now. You aren’t ready, and that’s okay, I promise.” Suguru's voice dropped lower, a soothing rhythm in the quiet room. "And yes, I do want more," he admitted honestly, his fingers brushing a loose strand of hair from your face. "But not at the expense of your comfort or well-being. I will never seek comfort from anyone else. You're the only one I want to be with, the only one I care about."

You nodded, the tension caused by your bickering melting away. Suguru's reassurances, patience, and understanding were comforts that began to ease your inner turmoil. With him, you felt safe, understood, and most importantly, valued. For most of your life, being cared about was a foreign notion to you. But as you lay there, nestled in Suguru's arms, you realized that despite your emotional upheaval, you’d found someone who cared about you deeply. Gradually, your tears began to dry, and the ache in your chest was replaced by a sense of warmth and security that only Suguru could provide.

Was it any wonder you loved him?

Chapter Text

The next day, you awoke to the delicious scent of freshly made breakfast. You opened your eyes as the bed dipped, seeing Suguru carrying a tray containing two plates filled with pancakes, bacon, and eggs. A bowl of fresh fruit was on the side, and there were two steaming cups of tea. Your mouth watered at the feast before you, and you eagerly accepted your mug of tea, a content sigh leaving you as the hot liquid hit your taste buds.

“What’s the occasion?” you asked as you popped a piece of bacon into your mouth.

He smiled. “No occasion, just thought breakfast in bed would be nice.”

You smiled back, though some of you wondered if there was an underlying motive. Perhaps, he was trying to coax the truth out of you, hoping that additional pampering would be enough for you to lay out the entirety of your dark past. However, after the events of last night, he may truly want a peaceful morning, and this surprise was meant to destroy any lingering tension. You prayed it was the latter.

You decided you were reading too much into it and focused on filling your belly. You took a bite of pancakes, and the sweet syrup and fluffy texture had you humming in delight. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Suguru staring at you, his lips still stretched into a smile. He didn’t spark up any conversation, though. Instead, the two of you fell silent, the sound of clinking forks and chewing filling the air.

After a while, the food was gone, and the silence had stretched on for too long. Suguru carried the dirtied dishes out of the room. You watched his retreating form, admiring how his clothes clung to him. But your lust for him wasn’t enough to erase your sense of unease, because you knew it was only a matter of time before he brought up last night’s episode. He was owed an explanation, but you’d prefer it if the entire incident was just forgotten about.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t how things panned out.

When he returned to bed, he cleared his throat. You tensed, fearing what would come out of his mouth next.

"Can we talk?" he asked, his tone cautious.

You looked up, a lump in your throat. "About what?"

Your attempt at playing dumb had him narrowing his eyes, worsening the anxiety that had started to wash over you.

"Izumi,” he said firmly, done beating around the bush. “What happened last night?”

You looked at your lap, fiddling with the fabric of your shirt. You wracked your mind for excuses but came up blank. You knew that there was no dodging the truth, no matter how much you wished there was a way to escape this situation. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, willing yourself to stay calm.

"I... had a panic attack," you mumbled, deciding to buy some time by stating the obvious.

“No shit,” he said, the harshness of his tone making you flinch.

He sighed, the frustrated sound making guilt gnaw at your insides. You hated this tension and feared it’d make things awkward between the two of you. Yet, opening up about your past may make everything worse. If he knew, the way he’d see you would change, and he would likely regret choosing to get close to you.

After all, he could have his pick of women. Why would he choose a broken one?

"You're going to think less of me," you said after a long stretch of silence, still unable to look at him.

"Impossible,” he whispered, scooting closer and wrapping an arm around your waist.

You shook your head, finally looking at him. "You don’t know that.”

He scowled down at you, the harsh expression making you avert your gaze again. “I think I know myself well enough to know how I’ll feel, and what happened last night gives me a big fucking clue about what you went through.”

Your heart dropped, and you tried to pull away, wanting nothing more than to flee from this conversation. You’d kept the memories of Kai’s abuse suppressed for so long, and in twenty-four hours, you were being forced to confront them repeatedly. You wished you could just go curl up somewhere and hide, anything to prevent the inevitable. But Suguru’s grip was too firm for you to move, giving you no choice but to stay close.

"Izumi," he said softly. "Whatever it is, I won't judge you. I need to know so I can help."

"You can't help me," you snapped, a mixture of frustration and embarrassment rising inside of you. "You can't make the memories go away. You can't—"

He shushed you, pulling you against his chest and stroking your hair. You stiffened at first, but the sensation of his fingers combing through your locks was comforting.

"Tell me,” he urged, his voice soft but demanding.

You took a deep breath, aware that you were on the verge of collapse. You did not want to shed more tears or have another breakdown.

“I don’t want how you look at me to change. What if—”

"Stop trying to tell me how I’ll feel,” he ordered, his grip tightening. "Just spit it out, Izumi."

You went silent, unsure if you could tell him. It was one thing to say it to Takara, an employee who’d experienced something similar to you. But it was different to tell Suguru. Not even his desire for you could overcome the fact that you were damaged goods, and you couldn’t handle it if he rejected you over the abuse you faced.

When you remained silent, he tilted your chin up, forcing you to look him in the eyes. His gaze was intense, a storm of emotions swirling within the dark depths. You swallowed, your resolve quickly crumbling.

“It’s a long story,” you said quietly, trying to will yourself to tell him.

“We’ll take all the time you need, Izumi,” he reassured. “I have no investors to meet with, and anyone needing a healing session can return again.”

His words were a small comfort. You took another deep breath, trying to gather the courage to divulge your past. Relationships were built on trust and honesty. If you hid a vital part of your story, how could you ever expect something serious to blossom between the two of you?

“Did I ever tell you how long I was in Kuroki?” you asked.

He’d found you imprisoned in a dingy cell, in a building that would’ve received multiple code violations had it been in a big city. That, combined with the pieces of information you’d revealed, meant he likely had an estimate lingering in his head.

“A decade,” you said before he could answer. “I…stumbled upon the village when I was about eight, and they locked me up when they discovered my technique.” 

You decided not to share the finer details, such as what led to you finding Kuroki, or the brutal way the townsfolk got to experience your technique. For this conversation, those elements of your past were irrelevant.

Suguru was quiet, letting you tell your tale. The silence allowed you the space to gather your thoughts, and the comforting feeling of him stroking your hair gave you the strength to continue.

“They let a boy decide my fate, made him be in charge of me.”

As Kai’s family had been the victim of your technique, it was deemed fair that he be the one to decide what became of you. But instead of ordering your death, he spent years tormenting you.

“He used to just…insult and taunt me a lot. But as we got older, he started growing more…. touchy with me….”

You trailed off, the memory of his hands on your body making you shiver. You remembered how his fingers would trace your jaw, his thumb pressing against your bottom lip before he forced it into your mouth, his breath fanning your face as he was on top of you. You remembered how much you hated what he’d do to you, hating him for keeping you alive to satisfy sick desires.

Yet, Kai didn’t care about your feelings, and the townspeople didn’t care about his abuse. He was free to use and hurt you, and nothing could stop him.

And even in death, his mistreatment haunted you, and the very memories made you nauseous.

You felt Suguru tense, his grip on you tightening and hand pausing. You glanced up at him and saw the anger written all over his face, already connecting the dots.

"He raped you," he stated, his voice dangerously low.

The word had your skin crawling, and you quickly shook your head. Though he used your body for his pleasure, he never penetrated you, deeming his cock too good for your cunt. That would never stop him from using his fingers on you, from forcing himself down your throat, or from using your breasts to get off, among other things.

"Not rape. He never—"

"If you didn't consent, it was rape," he hissed, his tone leaving no room for argument.

You shrank back, feeling ashamed. You willed yourself to continue, knowing the discussion couldn’t end here.

“We never had sex, Suguru, so—”

“Oh, he molested you, my bad,” he said, sarcasm dripping from every word.

"Would you let me finish?" you snapped, tiring of his interruptions.

He frowned but nodded. His anger was still very palpable, and the scowl marring his face had you cowering. You were tempted to try to escape his grasp and run. But you stayed, knowing he was owed an explanation, no matter how much it pained you. You reminded yourself he wouldn't hurt you, took a deep breath, and continued.

"We didn't have sex, but he did a lot of things to me. He made me feel…so helpless and scared. I had no choice if I wanted to survive, so I just went along with it. In exchange, he’d bring me food, clean me off, and get me drawing supplies."

He scoffed. "How considerate of him."

You narrowed your eyes, his attitude making this entire discussion more difficult. "Would you stop?"

You knew his rage wasn’t directed at you, but that knowledge gave you little comfort. He didn't reply to your plea. Instead, he just stared at you, his scowl slowly disappearing.

“Fine,” he finally said through gritted teeth, his expression unreadable.

"It wasn't a fair deal, but it was all I had," you continued, ignoring his irritation. "It was either submit to him or die, so I chose to live. And that's how things were until you rescued me and the girls. I’m so thankful to be out of that village, but what happened there still haunts me. And yesterday…"

You trailed off, needing to take a moment. Suguru said nothing, though his fingers began to stroke your hair again. The comforting gesture helped you relax, and the tears you fought to keep at bay started to slide down your cheeks.

He relaxed a bit, the muscles in his jaw loosening as you leaned into his touch. "I'm sorry, Izumi."

You buried your face in his chest, clinging to him.

"It's okay," you mumbled, though it wasn't.

It wasn't even remotely okay. But if nothing else, you were just grateful to have someone who seemed to be understanding.

He nodded, a far-away look in his eyes. You weren't sure if he was processing what you said or was too angry to respond. After a few moments, he blinked, and his expression became more readable. He held you tight, his body trembling.

"Suguru?" you asked, concern flooding you. "Are you alright?"

“I’m fine,” he said, though his tone indicated the opposite. “Just wish he died a more painful death.”

You gawk at him. “The village was on fire when he left. He probably burned to death!”

And in your opinion, that was the worst way to die. It still ate at you knowing that was how your family perished, leading you to discover Kuroki and a decade of trauma.

“His dick should’ve been chopped off first,” he seethed. “What he did to you was unforgivable, and I’m sorry I couldn’t get my hands on the bastard. He’s lucky he’s dead.”

His words stunned you into silence. You didn’t disagree with the sentiment, as a part of you regretted you hadn’t been the one to bring about his downfall. However, it gave you comfort knowing he died suffering. Knowing that Suguru wasn’t satisfied with him dying in one of the most painful ways imaginable unnerved you. You didn’t know how to respond—how to soothe him—so you opted to stay silent. Yet, as he stewed in his anger, he showed no signs of cooling off.

He looked down at you, the storm in his eyes still raging.  "Is there anything else you need to tell me, Izumi? Any more secrets that I need to know?" he asked, his tone sharp. “Actually, let’s start with something simple. What happened yesterday?”

The way he spoke was accusatory, and you couldn't help but frown. The care that had been present moments before seemed to evaporate, his fury overtaking his reason. Yes, you should’ve divulged your past before your intimacy progressed, and yes, there were still things he didn’t know about you. But neither warranted being the victim of his wrath. If anything, his reaction solidified that you’d been right to keep your mouth shut.

You pulled away from him, his touch no longer a comfort. You crossed your arms and glared at him, feeling a flicker of rage rising inside of you, mixing with the hurt that had already taken root. "There's no reason to be angry with me," you snapped, your tone matching his. "I had no control over what happened."

“You should’ve told me sooner!”

“I didn’t see the point of telling you, because I knew it would do more damage than good,” you shouted, the way your voice cracked only annoyed you further.

He let out a frustrated sigh, then shook his head. "That's bullshit, Izumi. I could've helped!"

"It was too late, Suguru. What's done is done."

He ran his hand through his hair, messing it up. "You didn't give me a chance to help. You kept everything to yourself, and now you're surprised when I'm angry."

"You don't get to be angry!" you protested, growing angrier by the second. “You weren’t the one who went through that, who had to deal with it!”

“But I have to deal with the consequences! Yesterday proved that, and I still don’t know what happened.”

“I had a panic attack!”

He let out a humorless laugh. “I know that, but why? What brought it on, dammit?!”

You glared at him, not wanting to answer. This argument proved you’d been right to fear his reaction. You clamped your mouth shut, unwilling to hear more of his harsh words. But after several moments of silence, he grabbed your shoulders, giving you no choice but to face him.

"Tell me," he demanded, his tone leaving no room for arguments. "If we're going to move forward, I need to know, Izumi."

You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. This argument was getting nowhere, and you knew the only way to end it was by sharing the truth. Suguru wouldn’t let up otherwise, and it’d worsen the tension between you two.

"I saw a man at the mall who looked like him," you said quietly.

“Was that so hard?” he snipped, his hold on you loosening.

You narrowed your eyes at him, tempted to hit him. Your shadow started to grow active, ready to attack at a moment’s notice. But instead of resorting to violence, you shrugged him off and crawled out of bed, feeling too restless to remain seated. He watched you, the anger in his expression fading as he took in the tears brimming in your eyes. You sniffled, then turned away, unable to look at him.

He sighed, sounding more tired than anything as he realized the effect of his words. "Izumi, I didn't mean—"

Common sense and basic human decency returned to him, but the damage had been done.

"Forget it," you muttered, heading for the door. “Just forget we had this conversation.”

"No, goddamnit! Don't try and shut me out," he snapped, his indignation making you clench your fists.

A myriad of replies came to mind, but you dismissed them all. The conversation had drained you, and at that moment, you just wanted to be alone. So, all you said was, "Whatever."

You didn’t give him the chance to say anything else, slamming the door behind you as you left the room. You stalked to the bathroom, your vision growing misty. Maybe Takara had been wrong. Maybe, you’d never overcome the pain of your past, and you were destined to fail at every turn.

With that depressing thought weighing heavily on your mind, you slammed the bathroom door shut and allowed yourself to cry.

Chapter Text

After a shower filled with tears and self-loathing, you made your way back to the bedroom to get dressed. By then, Suguru was gone, his pajamas haphazardly thrown in the direction of the hamper. His absence relieved and crushed you. You couldn’t handle more arguing, and you’d have enough of confronting your past. You wanted it to stay buried, as unearthing it had led to what you feared. Even if he wouldn’t admit it, you knew he now saw you differently, in a more negative light.

 Once you were clothed, you slipped out of the room, determined to find a place where you could be alone. Perhaps, you could spend your day in the gardens. It always brought you comfort. But before you could venture off, you heard footsteps approaching. You looked up and saw Suguru coming down the hall. You didn’t want to speak to him. So, as childish as it was, you turned and attempted to run. However, he was quicker, grabbing your arm before you could flee.

“Izumi, please,” he said, the desperation in his voice making your heartache. 

His words from before kept you from giving in. You’d confided in him, only for him to affirm your greatest fears. The man you thought you knew would’ve treated you with understanding, but it seemed you’d grossly misjudged him.

So, you tugged your arm free and said, “Leave me alone.”

His eyes hardened, and instead of releasing you, his grip tightened. “We’re not done talking.”

You spun to face him, his disregard of your wishes angering you. “I don’t want to talk anymore. It’s pointless, and all it’s doing is hurting me.”

He winced, and guilt flickered across his features. “Izumi—”

You spun to face him, unable to contain your rage any longer. “I said leave me alone, Suguru!”

The venom in your tone took you both aback. With a slack jaw, he released you, the surprise and hurt in his eyes urging you to apologize. You stayed strong, though. While you may need to find better methods to cope with your trauma, you weren’t in the wrong.

Once he released you, you backtracked, going to your room to retrieve your drawing supplies. Lounging in the sun was no longer enough; you needed to distract yourself. You gathered your things and made your way to the gardens, struggling to push Suguru out of your mind.

The gardens were the most peaceful area of the temple, and the manicured nature was absolutely gorgeous. You sat under a tree by the Koi Pond, admiring the fish as you flipped to an empty page in your drawing pad. You should’ve finished one of your incomplete drawings, but an embarrassing amount of them featured Suguru as the subject. Right now, you couldn’t bear to look at him, even in the form of a drawing. You decided to do a simple landscape, taking inspiration from your beautiful surroundings.

If only you’d been granted peace to outline them.

A shadow suddenly loomed over you, making you raise your head. When you saw Suguru staring down at you, a frown etched itself onto your lips. Not only had he silently crept to you, but he was violating your request. What part of leaving you alone didn’t he understand?

Instead of saying a word, you went back to drawing. You needed time to decompress, some time to forget the hurt his reaction caused. Engaging with him would prevent both.

“Izumi,” he said, after seconds of you ignoring him passed.

“Suguru,” you mimicked, still not looking at him.

He sighed; his frustration clear. “Can we please talk?”

You paused, then raised your head to look him in the eyes. The gesture inspired hope to blossom within him, but it was quickly dashed when you said, “No,” and then returned to sketching the landscape.

As you worked on the outline of the Koi Pond, your sketchpad was ripped from your hands and tossed aside, making you gasp. You looked at the culprit—Suguru—with a gaping jaw, before leaning over to get it. But once again, his speed gave him the advantage. He scooped it up before your hands could even touch it.

“Give it back!” you demanded, standing to grab it.

He held it just out of reach, his superior height making it impossible to steal the tablet back.

“Not until we talk,” he said, glaring down at you.

His words didn’t have their desired effect, as they only served to enrage you.

“Keep this up, and I won’t talk to you the rest of the week!” you yelled, jumping up to grab your drawing tablet.

The moment your hands grasped it, you yanked with all your might, Suguru’s shock loosening his hold and allowing you to steal it back. You landed on your butt immediately afterward, but you considered it worth it.

“That was uncalled for,” he gritted.

“So is you being a dick, but here we are,” you snapped, settling back under the tree.  Your use of a swear word took him aback and was enough to make him go silent. You took the opportunity to continue speaking. “All I asked is that you leave me alone, and I thought you’d be smart enough to realize I need some time away from you! So please, just leave me alone for now.”

Silence. Then…

“Promise we’ll talk later.”

“Fine,” you said, your agreement enough to have him retreating into the temple.

Once he was out of sight, you took a deep breath, struggling to calm your nerves. His behavior was over the top and disappointed you. You knew he had a temper, but you were foolish enough to think you’d be exempt from it, that you’d only ever receive Suguru’s understanding and care. With a soul-weary sigh, you leaned back against the tree and tried to focus on finishing the Koi Pond. However, your heart was no longer in it. Instead of being set on doodling the day away, it was now aching at the thought these bouts of quarrels could mean the end of your relationship.

How sad that would be, your relationship with Suguru fizzling out before it could officially start.

Ten minutes after you returned to sketching, the sound of crunching leaves reached your ears. Tensing, you looked up, expecting—and dreading—to see Suguru try to apologize for yet another outburst.

You were pleasantly surprised to see one of the temple cats. A small smile tugged at your lips as it came closer, and you held a hand out for it to sniff. When it brushed against your hand and began to purr, you felt like a magical being had cast favor upon you. 

“Hey, little thing,” you crooned, giggling when it shoved its way onto your lap, making a bed out of your drawing tablet.

It, too, was against your sketching.

You tried to scoop the kitty up and set it aside. The moment you tried to move it, it meowed and snapped at you, making you recoil.

“Hey, no biting!” you chastised.

In response, it settled down, determined to stay on your lap. As you frowned down at the cat, it butted its head against your chest. Your elementary biology teacher explained that the gesture was called 'bunting,' and meant the feline was either showing affection or trying to scent you. Both possibilities brought a smile to your face and had you resigning yourself to your fate. You scratched behind its ears, earning a purr. With the kitty in your lap, you couldn’t finish your drawing, but it was a tradeoff you were okay with.

The sound of someone clearing their throat caught your attention. You looked up, your smile broadening when you saw Tsuda standing near the Koi Pond. He was staring down at you with a sheepish expression, making you furrow your brows.

“Is everything okay, Tsuda?” you asked.

He nodded, then scratched the back of his head. “Yeah…. just saw you sitting here…with my favorite cat. Thought I’d say hello.”

You looked down at the now sleeping cat, giggling. “Your favorite, huh?”

“She’s very affectionate,” he said, crouching down, and rubbing her head. She lifted its head, purring louder at the additional attention. He grinned. “See?”

As he lavished the cat with attention, you took a moment to admire him. His overalls were stained with dirt and exposed his arms, allowing his muscles to show. Gardening must’ve been a great workout, because he was quite toned. But though his body was impressive, his face was the star of the show. It was boyishly handsome, with bright eyes, and a warm smile. Unlike with Suguru, you didn’t feel wanton desire toward him. Yet, you’d be lying if you said he wasn’t easy on the eyes, and that his attention didn’t give you butterflies. 

He caught you staring and gave a sly smile, snapping you out of your reverie. You cleared your throat, trying not to blush.

“Uhm, what’s her name?” you asked, hoping the question would prevent him from teasing you. 

You got enough of that from Suguru. You did not need a second person making fun of you.

“Most of the cats don’t really have names,” he replied. “It’d be hard to remember them all.”

With the sheer number of cats the temple housed, it’s understandable the majority went without a moniker. However, as you looked down at the purring feline in your lap, you felt it would be an injustice if she did not receive a title of some sort.

“We should name her,” you declared.

He looked surprised. “Huh?”

“We should name her,” you repeated, scratching the kitty’s chin. “She needs a name.”

He chuckled. “I don’t think she cares. She’s a cat.”

“Your point?”

The neighborhood you lived in prior to Kuroki was home to several strays, and you made it a point to name your favorites.

He gave an amused huff, then nodded. “Alright. What do you have in mind?”

You inspected the cat, noting all defining features. She was incredibly fluffy, but beyond her thick coat of hair, she was small. She was spotted, with only her stomach being solidly white. Of all the spots, one on her head stood out to you.

“How about Luna?” you said, pointing to a crescent-shaped spot. “Because of the moon on her forehead.” 

Tsuda leaned forward, squinting at the cat. After a few moments, he shook his head. “No, I think it's a sun, actually.”

You furrowed your brows and examined the spot again. Definitely a moon.

“It’s a crescent,” you countered, your fingers tracing the spot. “Aka, a moon.”

He stared down at the cat, tilting his head to the side as if perplexed. After some seconds, he looked back at you. “I still see a sun,” he said, making you roll your eyes. “But, Luna is a nice name.”

“And it’s still a moon,” you countered, earning another chuckle. “But I’m happy you like the name.”

He nodded, his lips curling into a soft smile. “It’s cute. Just like you.”

The unexpected compliment took you aback. While you gawked at him, his gaze remained on Luna, a pink tinge present on his cheeks. You debated on whether he was trying to flirt or giving friendly praise. He didn’t elaborate, instead focusing on the cat. She leaned into his touch, delighted with the attention she was receiving. 

Whatever Tsuda’s intentions were, you didn’t think he was a bad guy. So instead of dwelling on his words, you decided to enjoy his company. Besides, his presence was a welcome distraction, pushing the spat you and Suguru had to the back of your mind. You wouldn’t let overthinking ruin that. 

Peace washed over you as you basked in the warmth of the sun, the purring of a content feline filling the air. For the first time today, you were relaxed, without a worry in the forefront of your mind.

The calm wouldn’t last long.

As Luna drifted off to sleep, you and Tsuda resumed some light chitchat, distracting you from the sound of someone stomping over. But when a familiar shadow loomed over the two of you, it became impossible to ignore the new presence in your midst. Looking up, you saw Suguru standing over the two of you. A scowl was on his face as he examined the proximity between you and Tsuda, his fists clenching. The intensity that he glared at the blond made you tense, and the storm brewing in his eyes did nothing to soothe your sudden dread.

You cleared your throat, breaking the silence that had enveloped the three of you. “Is something wrong, Suguru?”

He briefly transferred his glare to you, before refocusing on Tsdua. The poor man nearly trembled as Suguru stared. You couldn’t blame him for shrinking back; if looks could kill, he’d be quite dead. Moreover, Suguru was a large, intimidating man.

Tsuda drew in a shaky breath, struggling to get ahold of himself. “Sir, I, uh, was just—”

“Leave,” Suguru boomed, his voice dangerously low.

That one word had Tsuda jumping to his feet and scampering off, looking over his shoulder to cast you a regretful look. But when Suguru followed your line of sight, Tsuda was quick to redirect his gaze forward. Your shoulders sagged as the blond faded out of sight.

And, to add insult to injury, Luna woke up at that moment. She stretched, and with a meow, she scampered off in the direction that Tsuda went. Now, it was just you and Suguru.

“That was unnecessary,” you snapped after a heartbeat of silence.

How dare he? First, he brought your fears to life and made you feel lesser for sharing your past with him. Then, after you asked for space, he stormed into the gardens—your safe place—and tore your notebook from your hands. Now, he’d sent away the person who managed to make you feel better. Not only did it have you fuming, but it was enough to have tears springing to your eyes. The day had been another emotionally draining one, clouding your head, and making you wish you could hide from the world until you felt better.

When Suguru caught sight of the tears brewing, his scowl deepened. “Are you really going to cry?”

As the words left his mouth, you swore a piece of yourself died. His harsh words made your heartache and did no favors for your haywire emotions. 

“No,” you said, quickly swiping at your eyes to erase any wetness. “I’m not.”

“You pushed me away, just to run into the arms of another man, and you’re crying?”

“Tsuda and I weren’t doing anything but talking!”

He scoffed, a bitter sound that had you flinching. “Sure, you weren’t.”

“Oh my gosh, what’s wrong with you?” you yelled, implying that you were lying setting you off.

“Nothing. If anything, you should be asking yourself that.”

Little did he know, you’d been wracking your mind with that question. Two days ago, everything had been fine. You and the twins were safe, your relationship with Suguru had progressed past sexual tension that left your head spinning, and your training was progressing nicely. Your life was better than ever before, and yet, it only took seeing a Kai lookalike for your world to seemingly collapse around you.

Were you truly so weak? Someone bearing a resemblance to a dead man shouldn’t have you spiraling, but it did. Even once you processed that it wasn’t him, the incident at the mall left you feeling unstable.

Still, you refused to let Suguru be privy to that. You’d shared something personal with him, just for him to make you feel lesser. You wouldn’t make that mistake again.

You narrowed your eyes at him, ignoring the hurt blooming in your chest. “Just leave me alone, please. If you have nothing to say to me, I don’t want to talk to you.”

Instead of abiding by your wishes, he said, “And I don’t want you talking to Tsuda again.”

“That isn’t for you to decide!”

He smiled, though it lacked warmth. “He’s under my employ. If I don’t want him talking to you, then he won’t, if he knows what’s good for him.”

The fact that he was trying to police who you interacted with infuriated you. Before you said or did something you’d regret, you gathered your art supplies and marched into the temple, ignoring Suguru’s demands that you return. You needed space right now, not to be berated for having a friend.

******

Suguru stared at your retreating form with a clenched jaw, wrestling with himself on whether he should go after you. Today hadn’t gone according to plan. Last night had been a disastrous disappointment. He tried to take things to the next level, and you’d lost your shit. He thought about leaving you alone as you threw your fit, then realized that you needed affection, not isolation. Pushing you away would’ve been the easy route but would’ve caused more problems down the line. So, he ignored his annoyance and coddled you, hoping it would aid in coaxing out the truth.

It did, but unfortunately, he hadn’t been able to remain so composed when he heard what you went through. He’d been angry, angry that you’d gone through so much, angry that he hadn’t been able to make your abuser suffer, angry that you kept something like that from him. Knowing it’d taken so long for him to earn your trust did nothing for his temper, as he thought he’d secured your devotion long ago. He was wrong, and all of that had cumulated in him being more insensitive than he meant to be.

When he tried to right his wrongs, you’d pushed him away. Then, when he decided enough was enough, he found you laughing with another man.

Grinding his teeth, he made a mental note to deal with the fucker later. As much as he longed to nip the issue in the bud, you took precedence. So, he stomped to your quarters, the look on his face dark enough to have any staffers scrambling out of his way.  He barged into the room, prepared to argue with you as long as it’d take for you to see reason.

Would it immediately help matters? Not in the slightest, but he didn’t care. He refused to let you ignore him and push him aside for another man, one lesser than him at that. If having a screaming match was the key to keeping your attention, so be it. He’d fix the damage later.

Every word he prepared to say died on his tongue when he noted your absence. He checked the bathroom, just to find it empty. He peeked in his room and saw it lacking your presence.

A pit formed in his stomach. Nothing of yours was missing, so he knew you weren’t mad enough to leave. You were just avoiding him. After spending time with and defending a fucking gardener, you decided he was too unpleasant to be around.

His hands curled into fists, your childish antic sending a fresh bout of fury through him. You were neglecting him, partially over another man. It was enough to have him plotting ways to deal with the gardener, pain a cornerstone of many of them. He needed some time to decide on what to do, but regardless, that fucking blond would get his comeuppance.

And as for you, if that’s how you want to play, then so be it.

Chapter Text

The following day, Suguru had two things on his agenda. Well, three, if he included his willful pettiness toward you. You slept in your room again, and he returned your cold shoulder by barely acknowledging your presence. He hadn’t missed the frown on your face as you stole glances at him, silently willing him to look. He did no such thing and intended to ignore you until you groveled. Or, until that fuck ass blond was gone. Whichever happened first.

Speaking of which….

  His first order of business was dealing with fucking Tsuda. An array of ways to get rid of him swirled in Suguru’s hand. He could just use a curse to dispose of him, but as this was a personal matter, he wanted to do it himself. Pluck out his teeth for smiling at you before slitting his throat. Stab his eyes for looking at you then throwing him into the woods to fend for himself. Slaughtering him with the very tools he worked with, and the list of ideas went on. Some methods made him more excited than others, but none would be pleasant for that blond fuck.

Suffering was what he deserved for trying to make a move on you after he made it explicitly clear to all temple staffers that you were off-limits. Maybe, losing a finger or two would drill it through his head. But that’d put his hands out of commission, making him useless as a gardener. He was decent at his job, so if Suguru let him live, he’d have to be able-bodied enough to do physical labor. Perhaps taking an ear would be better. The two of you couldn’t talk if Blondie couldn’t hear you. 

Unfortunately, when Suguru went to find him, he found a beefier brunette gardener in his stead. It was then Suguru remembered his employees had one day of their choosing off, and a quick check let him know Tsuda wasn’t on the premises. He’d be back tomorrow, giving him an extra day to decide what to do with Blondie.

It was for the best, since Suguru was flip-flopping on what methods to employ. 

Until then, he’d move on to his second order of business; Ose Yumiko. 21 years old, born and raised in Shizuoka, she became a miko shortly after graduating high school. That didn’t matter to Suguru, though. No, what mattered to him was her pretty face and big tits. She couldn’t compare to you, but she was appealing enough to make his cock twitch. 

“You called for me?” she asked as she rose from her bow, licking her lips as her eyes scanned over him.

It was an effort for him not to roll his eyes. It was obvious how eager she was, and while he was judging her for it, it made his plans easier. He didn't have time to seduce a woman; one loose and willing was better. He was on borrowed time, because at that moment, you, the twins, and their nanny were on the other side of the temple’s living quarters, in the TV room watching some cheesy show. He didn’t know when the TV would lose your attention, so he wanted this over as soon as possible.

He'd say a few words, fuck her until he was satisfied, then tell her to keep her mouth shut and dismiss her. He wasn’t tempted to go down on her or draw out foreplay, so the whole ordeal should go by quickly.

"Lock the door," he ordered, watching her from the chaise lounge he sat on.

Though he was angry with you, he couldn't bring himself to defile the quarters you two shared with a whore he'd discard. So, he summoned Ose to a small sitting room that was seldom used. The chaise he sat on was spacious enough for him to lie back and relax. He’d have her ride him, then close his eyes and imagine it was you. Because though he was tired of waiting for you to be ready, and desperately needed a hot cunt to relieve his frustrations, you were the only woman he wanted.

"As you wish, sir," she purred, locking the door, and then sauntering to him.

Her eyes glimmered with lust. As soon as Ose reached him, she crawled on top of him. Even through their clothes, he could feel her pussy throbbing with want. If it'd been you, he'd be thrilled. But right now, he could only think how desperate she was, and not in a way he appreciated. The most he'd spoken to her was when you and he were selecting nannies for the girls, and the exchange was hardly pleasant. Yet, with a few words, she was ready to forsake her vows and fuck.

What a slut.

She straddled him, untying her kimono and exposing her breasts. Her nipples were perky, and her tits were firm. She had a nice set, but he barely felt any arousal.  By no means, was the shirtless woman on top of him unattractive. She just wasn't you.

Doubt began to creep in. His lack of bodily reaction was a sign he should call the whole thing off. Instead, he pushed his uncertainty away and grabbed her hips.

"Kiss me," he demanded.

She giggled, the high-pitched sound making him cringe. "My pleasure."

Was his dick broken, or was she just that unappealing?

She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. Her eyes shut immediately, but Suguru kept his open. The sensation of her mouth wasn't pleasant. It took all his effort not to cringe at her lack of skill. Her motions were too sloppy, too forceful, and the way she gyrated her hips only annoyed him.

Fuck, could he do this?

When her lips moved down to his neck, he closed his eyes and tried to imagine it was you. If that was the case, he'd find your inexperience endearing instead of unappealing. His grip on her hips tightened as he built up a fantasy, one involving you groveling for spending time with that fucking gardener, apologizing with your body. The thought of your soft, sweet lips against his skin started to arouse him, and finally, his dick began to harden.

Ose gasped when his erection pressed into her clothed cunt. Her hands began to roam, and she started to gyrate against him, breathy moans leaving her. An eye twitched at the sound, the pitch not right. He'd grown accustomed to hearing your pants as you trained, your little whimpers as you two kissed, and your gasps when his hands traveled your body. No matter the circumstances, any sound you made was music to his ears, simply because it came from you. Ose, however, was just aggravating him.

Fuck.

He wasn't going to be able to do this.

That thought was solidified when Ose's teeth scraped against his throat, her hands fondling his hard cock. The image he created in his head shattered. You'd never be so rough, so bold.

"Stop," he ordered, pushing her away.

She blinked down at him, confused. "Huh?"

"Get off," he growled, his patience wearing thin when she remained on top of him.

If he pushed her off, it'd be because of her hard head.

Hurt settled on her face and her lips pursed into a pout. She climbed off him, covering up and retying the kimono.  "Did I do something wrong, sir?"

"Yes," he snapped, standing, and fixing his attire.

She flinched, shrinking back at his harsh tone. "I-I'm sorry. I can try harder."

He waved her off. "Just go. We're done here. Don’t breathe a word of this to anyone."

If this incident got back to you, he hadn’t a clue how you’d react, or if it’d be possible to reverse the damage. Though he was still hard, he'd deal with the problem himself, refusing to allow another woman to touch him so intimately. 

This was a learning moment for him, and he wouldn’t disregard the lesson.

Suguru expected her to meet his demands without question. Instead, her face became determined, and she returned to his lap.

“She won’t find out,” she purred, the bashfulness from moments before disappearing. “I swear, I won’t utter a word.”

He gritted his teeth. Losing patience, he pushed her off, not batting an eye at the gasp she released. To prevent her from denying him again, he stood.

“As I said, we’re done here,” he said with a glare, the scowl she wore not phasing him. “Try that again, and I won’t be so nice.”

He started to leave the room, but the next sentence that left Ose's mouth had him stopping in his tracks, murderous rage filling him.  Before he could think about his actions, he turned on his heel and marched back to her, ending her little rant. Grabbing her throat, he slammed her against the wall, her gasps eliciting a cruel grin.

"You wanna say that again?" he asked, his face inches from hers.

Instead of groveling for her pathetic life, she doubled down, repeating her blasphemous words.

"You heard me," she hissed, ire in her eyes instead of fear. "The bitch you're devoted to isn't even faithful. You. The gardener. She's a who—”

A swift punch to the face had her reeling and prevented her from uttering that insult. A crack sounded, and she cried out as his fist connected with her nose. He threw her to the floor, then straddled her before she could scramble away. He wrapped his hands around her throat, squeezing until her eyes bugged out. She scratched at his hands and arms, trying to free herself. Her terrified expression let him know she'd finally realized what a threat he was, but it was too little, too late.

As her movements slowed and her eyes glazed over, she tried to claw his eyes. He winced, but she was too weak to do any real damage, and he was too upset to stop. When that failed, she tried to activate her technique. His eyes watered, and beads of sweat began to roll off him, but her liquefication was too weak to do any damage. Her insults repeated in his mind, preventing him from stopping.

 Her boldness might've been impressive if it wasn't used to insult you. Instead, her gull sent him into a fury. And the thought that there was truly something between you and the gardener did his temper no favors. One look at the security footage revealed that wasn't the case, but just imagining you with another man sent him over the edge.

His hands tightened, and finally, the last breath left Ose's lungs. Even when her chest stilled, he kept squeezing, wanting to make sure she was truly dead. Once he was satisfied, he twisted her head, snapping her neck and erasing any possibility of her making a recovery. He stood, staring at the body with disgust. He dusted himself off, vowing to take a nice, hot shower to erase her touch from his skin.

But first, he had to cleanse the room of Ose's corpse. The only evidence of the encounter was the rumpled chaise and the missing time. No one else besides him and Manami had access to the security footage, so they'd be no obstacles in erasing the damning evidence.

And if his assistant told Izumi, he'd have another body to deal with. As fond as he was of the woman, you were more important.

With a sigh, he summoned some curses, waving his hands toward the body to direct them. Large leech-like creatures slithered toward Ose, their suction, and sharp teeth ensuring little would be left of her when he came to clean the room hours later. If anyone stumbled upon the scene before them, he'd explain it away as curses he intended to use for training straying off and causing a 'tragedy.'

When the curses began to feast, a squelching crunch echoed through the room. If he had a weaker constitution, he might've gagged. Instead, he smirked and left the room to go to his quarters. He B-lined for the shower, feeling filthy. As the hot water rained down on him, he realized his attempt at revenge hadn't been worth the risk. It was petty, and his lack of attraction toward that dead bitch should've been a sign to put a stop to the scheme before it began.

Oh well. Too late for regrets, now. The only thing he could do was not repeat tonight's mistake.

After twenty more minutes of reflection and scrubbing, he exited the shower and went to his room, a towel the only thing protecting his modesty. You still hadn't returned from your TV marathon, letting him have complete privacy. He had the urge to seek you out and talk things over, but he decided against it. He still had his pride, and your absence allowed him to take care of another issue; his erection.

Maybe, he was a sadist, because it had yet to go down. The bloodlust he felt as he slaughtered Ose only excited him further, creating a very bothersome problem. As soon as he flopped down on his bed, he grabbed his phone and went to his favorite adult website. Logging in, he went to his saved videos. Satoru used to tease him about making accounts for porn websites, but it saved him the trouble of searching for something that appealed to him. And, as of late, you were the only thing that appealed to him. He had a plethora of dirty videos that featured whores who resembled you, making it easy to get loss in a fantasy.

Plus, he lacked a fresh pair of your panties, so jacking off to a pornstar that looked like you would have to do.

He opened a video that showcased a pretty girl on all fours, a thick cock shoved in her mouth, while another man pounded her cunt. Threesomes were a favorite genre of his. They reminded him of the good ol' days, when he and Satoru weren't enemies and shared women they both fancied. He'd hit the jackpot with the video currently playing. The girl resembled you so much, she could be your sister. Your lookalike was being shared by two men, one with shoulder-length black hair, and one with short platinum blond strands. It was easy for him to replace the actors with you, him, and Satoru. Never could he bring the fantasy to life, but that didn't stop him from thinking about it.

A lot.

The sound of the two men fucking her had him throbbing, and her muffled moans made him imagine what you would sound like in the same situation. His cock was aching for relief, and with prime masturbation material in front of him, he had no reason to deny himself. He stroked his length with one hand and held the phone up with the other. The longer he watched, the more he got lost in his impossible fantasy.

Your perfect lips would be wrapped around his dick, while your fingers shyly fondled his cum-filled balls. You'd try your best to take all of him down your throat, and when that failed, you'd stroke the amount of his shaft that couldn't fit. His moans would encourage you, and you'd smile, proud that you were pleasing him. When you started to get the hang of things, he'd fuck your throat, thrusting his hips and forcing his cock as deep as it'd go. Your adorable gags would only make him rougher, and the sight of your tear-filled eyes and little whines would bring him closer to the edge.

"Fuck," he moaned, the mental image resulting in his orgasm building fast. He slowed his pace, not ready to cum just yet.

While he fucked your mouth, Satoru would dedicate his attention to your pretty cunt, dripping wet and begging for attention. His friend would happily oblige. He'd trace your slit with his tongue, before plunging it into your needy holes. Your thighs would squeeze around Satoru's head as he lapped at your juices, your gaping mouth making it easier to take Suguru's dick.

Satoru's fingers would wiggle inside you, stretching you out and prepping your pussy for a long, hard cock. Satoru not only adored using his mouth but was very skilled with his tongue. Suguru would never admit it, but the blue-eyed boy had him beat when it came to giving head. He'd feast until you were a trembling mess, and then take your cunt. At that point, Suguru would've had a few orgasms himself, only to have you suck him back to life.

Suguru grunted, his pace picking up speed again as the fantasy continued. In his mind, the more cockdrunk you became, the greedier you'd become. Soon, you'd beg for both of their cocks to be inside you, even if that meant one of them taking your ass. You'd be a whimpering mess, your holes stuffed with fat dicks, drool trickling down your chin, and your head spinning.

"Shit," he cried, ropes of cum leaving him just as the video came to an end.

It was a damn good load, coating his hand and abdomen in thick, sticky fluid. His brain was a little foggy and his breathing was ragged, but the orgasm was just what he needed. It calmed him down, erasing the tension from his encounter with Ose. He needed to clean himself off, but right now, he was content basking in the afterglow of his lasciviousness.

At least he was, until the door opening had him scrambling.

Chapter Text

You stood still, frozen in shock as you heard Suguru’s loud moans. Hearing just his sounds of pleasure would’ve made your cheeks flame and you scurry away. But the accompanying feminine moans hurt you to your core, to the point that your fight-or-flight instinct kicked in. Or, in this case, fight, flight, or freeze. Your traitorous body chose the last option, allowing you to listen until the sounds of pleasure quieted down.

As silence settled over the room, your eyes watered. Was one fight truly all it took for him to find someone else? Did the sweet words he whispered, the kisses you two shared, mean nothing? Or maybe, he never stopped seeing other people. He just hid it from you, and now that he felt spurned, he wanted you to know how quickly he moved on.

Seconds turned to minutes, and your betrayal morphed into rage. Did he truly care so little for you? Had his kindness been nothing but a quest to get you into bed, and not the romantic courtship you imagined it to be?

The bastard.

Before you could think better of it, your hand was reaching out, and you flung the door open. You didn’t have much of a gameplan, besides letting Suguru know that you heard, that you knew what a fake he was. Except, you didn’t find him cuddled up with another woman after an intense lovemaking session. You found him alone, a towel under him, and a sticky white substance coating his abs. It didn’t take long for you to put two and two together. He’d been masturbating, and the source of the feminine moans likely came from the phone beside him.

Memories of the time Kai forced you to view porn to ‘improve your performance,’ flashed in your head. Then, you’d been disgusted and wanted to rip apart the disgusting magazines he shoved in your faces. Now, the immense amount of relief you felt knowing Suguru just watched porn was almost laughable. Even with how flustered you felt, you could breathe easier knowing Suguru hadn’t taken another woman to his bed.

For a moment, the two of you just stared at each other. Your face heated, the sight of his nude body sending desire through you, competing with the embarrassment coursing through you. Though you hadn’t forgiven him, you couldn’t deny he was a beautiful man, one whose body sent you into overdrive. As unwanted as it was, lust flooded you. You wish you could forget his words or swallow your pride, just to test out if you’d be able to handle touching him. The corners of his mouth lifted at your appraisal, and your breath caught as the towel began to tent.

You cleared your throat and dragged your eyes to his face, opening your mouth to say something, perhaps to initiate a conversation. Then, you remembered his behavior. His reaction to Kai, his rudeness to Tsuda, and the silent treatment he’d subjected you to the past few days. Your gaping jaw shut, and your wide eyes narrowed.

As much as you wanted him, you still needed your space. Right now, you don’t think you could bring up what happened the other day without bursting into tears.

“Sorry,” you muttered, closing the door, and leaving the room as he softly swore.

You heard him calling your name, but you paid no mind, instead going to take the shower his self-love session had distracted you from.

******

The next day, Suguru wasn’t so chilly towards you. The opposite, as he came to your room—as you hadn’t returned to sleeping in his bed—with a tray of breakfast. The sight sent a pang through you. Last time you’d awoken to the sight, it’d been to butter you up, just for him to tear you down moments later. While you accepted the food and drink with a polite smile, and nodded along when he spoke, you didn’t engage with him much. You knew it was childish, but you didn’t feel like speaking to him. You doubted you would until you received a proper apology.

When the end of the meal neared, he sighed. “Izumi, talk to me, please.”

“Hi Suguru. How are you?” you asked, miming a sarcastic character from a dramedy Takara had introduced you to.

Yesterday, Suguru’s silent treatment crushed you. Needing a distraction, you sought the girls and their nanny out, under the guise of a progress report. Even the twins knew something was up, and when they invited you to watch a TV show with them, you gladly accepted. Maybe you’d do the same thing today.

A sound akin to a growl left him. “You know what I mean.”

“No, I don’t,” you said, deciding to play dumb.

“Sarcasm doesn’t suit you,” he said through gritted teeth, a glare on his face.

“Rudeness doesn’t suit you, but you’ve been foul since you out about Kai,” you fired back, the bedspread suddenly becoming very interesting.

A heartbeat of silence passed before he spoke again. When he did, his voice was a lot softer.

“Izumi—”

“I need to get dressed,” you said, cutting off whatever he was going to say. “Please get out.”

“You can get dressed after we talk,” he snapped, his moment of gentleness disappearing.

“If it isn’t an apology, I don’t want to hear it.”

“Look, I know I reacted poorly, but—”

“That isn’t an apology,” you said, looking at him with narrowed eyes. “So please, get out. When you learn how to say sorry, we can speak.”

Your words shut him up, and you could tell he was taken aback. You hadn’t been so abrasive with him since those early days, back when he had yet to gain your trust. Even then, you watched your words, scared he’d hurt you otherwise. Now, you knew he wouldn’t use physical violence against a woman, just destroy her with his words.

That’s fine. If he wanted to be volatile because his temper got the better of him, you could do the same.

Instead of trying to spark conversation again, he gathered the tray and left the room, leaving you alone as requested. Your shoulders sagged once your door shut, the mushier feelings you repressed when he was present reappearing. Namely, your sadness. You wished you’d never spoken about your past to him, as you hated this rift, hated knowing Suguru wasn’t the saint you made him out to be.

But, maybe, you were a fool for thinking him to be a good man when you knew of his violent capabilities. You had yet to witness him being violent without a good cause, but that should’ve clued you in that he wasn’t as perfect as you thought. It should’ve been an indicator of how explosive he could be, but instead, you justified his actions because they were directed toward people who’d hurt you.

Perhaps, selfish was a better way to describe you, as you didn’t care about who he hurt, because it benefitted you and the twins.

You pushed your thoughts away, deciding you weren’t in the mental state for an internal debate. Instead, you turned your mind towards plans for the day. It was a tossup between drawing in the gardens or seeking Takara and the girls out again.

Suguru’s anger when he discovered you with Tsuda crossed your mind, the way he made the blond scramble with a single word. You didn’t want a repeat of that.

Another girl’s day, it was then.

******

The self-restraint it took Suguru not to throw the tray against the wall was remarkable. He was painfully aware of the fact that he'd fucked up, having an atrocious reaction to the sensitive information you shared with him, but you would not let him make amends for what he had done. Admittedly, his pride stopped him from caving in. As much as he wanted to get on his knees and beg your forgiveness, the mortification he’d feel over doing such a feat would keep him up at night.

Moreover, it stung knowing he’d been wrong about you. He thought you were pure, that he’d be the first to score every base with you. Though you were a virgin, you weren’t untainted. It gave him some solace knowing he’d be the first to go all the way, but he’d always hated being incorrect. He didn’t think you were a bad person for being victimized, but he did look at you differently. Somewhere along the way, your purity had become a core part of the image Suguru built for you. He’d come to adore so much about you—your creativity, your gentleness, your smile, your protective streak, even your temper—that he knew once he came to terms with what happened to you, it’d be water under the bridge. Your forgiveness would quicken his acceptance.

But how could he make things right when you were ignoring him?

Another thing he’d been wrong about, he didn’t think you could hold a grudge. Maybe it was due to him fucking up multiple times in short succession, yet whatever the reason was, you refused to give him the time of day. He knew you had a fiery streak and that you were capable of jealousy, but never did he think he’d fall victim to your ire. With how angry you were, it was a miracle your shadow hadn’t manifested and beat his ass.

When he reached the kitchen, a single glance at his expression had the servants scurrying out of his path. Except for one; Manami. She watched with interest as he slammed the tray onto a counter, staying put even as he put his head in his hands and sulked. When he stalked out of the room, she was quick to follow. Her heels clicked against the floor, the sound increasing in volume when she walked faster to catch up with him.

“Sir?”

Suguru gritted his teeth. He was fond of her, but he wasn’t in a social mood. Typically, he tried to hide how he felt. But no monkeys were around, so he did not need to mask his true emotions. Plus, Manami sparked your jealousy like no other woman, and the last thing he needed was for you to be jealous and angry. That combination might actually get his ass beat. 

“What, Manami?” he said when it became clear she wouldn’t stop pursuing him.

Figuratively and literally since she didn’t bother hiding her attraction to him. Conversations with her were laden with flirtations, something he’d grown used to. Normally, it both irked and flattered him, but at the moment, it only did the former.

She fell into step beside him, a frown on his face. “Is everything okay?”

“Fine,” he said, his voice curt.

The look she gave him indicated that she saw through his poor lie, but she didn’t call him out on his bullshit. “Alright…well, you have visitors.”

“Investors or regular monkeys?”

She snickered. The way he referred to ‘normal’ people always made her laugh. “The latter, sir.”

If all was well, her laugh would’ve earned a grin. But all wasn’t well, so his expression stayed impassive. “They can wait.”

He didn’t have the patience or desire to deal with anyone who wasn’t you. The longer your treatment of him went on, the more foolish he felt about the way he handled things. Right now, he wanted to return to the room or wherever the hell you were, and apologize until you spoke to him, pride be damned. If all went right, you’d at least accompany him to healing sessions again, a simple step in the right direction. If not, he didn’t know what he’d do. The longer this went on, the more his resentment grew.

As much as he wanted to ignore her, Manami spoke again, her tone serious. “Sir, you have duties to tend to. I know you and Izumi are on the outs or whatever, but you need to suck it up, or talk it out, so you can be our leader.”

Suguru paused, his irritation rising. Manami was bold and didn’t fear him, but she knew better than to order him. Instead of responding, he fixed her with a hard stare.

She sighed and held her hands up in mock surrender. “Okay, not my place. I'll let the visitors know they'll have to wait.”

As she strode away, he found himself frozen in place, considering his options, and mulling over her words. Admittedly, she wasn't wrong, even if his pride didn't like that fact. While he had a responsibility to the people under him and who sought him out, you were occupying his every thought. He missed you, and if he could wind back time, he’d hold his tongue and just comfort you. But that hadn’t happened. He’d fucked up, and now, he needed to fix things before they became irreparable.

Deciding his time would be better spent apologizing, he headed back to the room, praying he'd find you there. If it wouldn't be undignified, he would've ran. Instead, he forced himself to keep a brisk walk. As he neared the shared quarters, his pace slowed, and his mouth dried. He didn't know what he'd say or how to fix the damage he'd done, but he had to try.

He gave a knock on the door to announce his arrival but didn't wait for a response before he opened it. A quick peek revealed an empty room, causing a sinking feeling to fill him. Where could you have gone in twenty minutes? With a curse, he retreated and thought over places to search. He was determined to talk to you, so if he had to look on the roof, he would. As he stalked the halls, he couldn't help but feel like a pathetic little boy, pining for the affection of his crush. The feeling worsened when he ran into Manami again, who was trying to hold back a smirk.

"The visitors are getting antsy," she said.

He groaned but knew he couldn't delay any longer without a valid excuse. "Send them in. I'll meet them shortly."

"Alright."

As she walked away, he took a few deep breaths. He had a responsibility to his followers and ignoring it would cause trouble down the line. Yet, he could only think about you. He decided he'd check the gardens and the TV room, and if you weren’t there, he'd throw in the towel.

His first stop was the gardens, the place you frequented most often. Instead of finding you, he found a blond that was on the top of his shit list, too immersed in his work to be aware of his presence. A glance revealed you were nowhere in sight. At that moment, only Suguru and Tsuda were in the garden.

The perfect opportunity to exact revenge.

"Tsuda," he called, the sound of his voice bringing the blond fuck’s annoying humming to a halt.

Blondie turned around as if he were a character in a horror movie, gulping as he looked at Suguru. "Sir?"

He didn't bother fighting his grin, the fear he inspired giving him a mood boost. "Have you seen Izumi?"

He went rigid, then shook his head frantically. "No, sir. I believe she's with her nanny. T-they've been watching TV a lot."

Tsuda cleared his throat as he stuttered, attempting to cover up his nerves with a small chuckle.

Suguru nodded. His decision to check the gardens was proving to be one of the smartest he made all week, as he uncovered your location and finally caught the gardener alone. Now that he knew where you were, he began to formulate a plan. He'd set out to the TV room, say his piece, and hopefully see the visitors with you by his side.

But first...

"Take a break," Suguru ordered. "You and I need to talk."

He didn't give the blond a chance to respond, grabbing his arms and dragging him to a nice, dark corner of the gardens.

******

You could only stare with wide eyes, mouth agape, as you witnessed the violence unfolding in front of you. Tears pricked your eyes, a shaky gasp escaping you. There was so much blood, it stained every surface and colored the corpse’s blond hair red.

“No!” Nanako cried, clinging to her sister.

“I can’t believe it,” Takara muttered, her handful of chips frozen midair.

All four of you were left shocked by the death of one of the main characters of the show you were watching. There’d been hints sprinkled throughout the season that her latest fling was an unstable hothead, but none of you would’ve guessed it would cumulate to kidnapping and murder. Her gruesome demise was a far cry from the show’s usual tone. Sure, it had heart-wrenching and dramatic moments, but this level of violence was unprecedented. The actress must’ve angered one of the showrunners, for them to write her off in such a manner.

The suddenness of the character’s death caused Takara to pause the show, looking at the girls.

“Are you two okay?” she asked, breathing a sigh of relief when they nodded. “I know that was…a bit intense.”

That was an understatement. The camera had panned to the wall as the actual murder occurred, only showing blood splatter, and letting the screams be heard. Shamefully, it hadn’t even crossed your mind to check up on the twins, as after everything they’d been through, you figured a fictional character dying would be nothing.

Then again, you wanted to shed some tears, so you might be wrong.

Once it was confirmed the girls wouldn’t walk away from the TV room with additional trauma, a discussion about what just happened was sparked. You mostly listened, contributing a word here and there. It brought a smile to your face to see the girls so passionate and animated, furiously nodding at each point the other brought up. The four of you were so absorbed in the conversation, that you didn’t realize Suguru had entered the room until he was standing beside you, his face unreadable.

“Izumi,” he said, his voice a low murmur.

“Oh, hi,” you responded, your mind still reeling from the events on screen. It took you some seconds to realize that Suguru shouldn’t be in the TV room but on the other side of the temple healing people. “Why are you here?”

His jaw tightened. You noticed that his hair wasn’t as manicured as normal, and his robes were somewhat rumpled. There was something off about him, but you couldn't pinpoint what it was. He didn’t even glance at the girls, keeping his focus on you.

"We need to talk," he said, his words short and clipped.

Your brows furrowed. He seemed to still be upset over the brief spat from earlier. At least, that was your guess. Though you didn’t know what his exact issue was, you weren’t in the mood to deal with attitude.

“I’m busy,” you responded, grabbing the remote from Takara to put the show back on.

The conversation between the girls and their nanny died down, a glance revealing they were entirely focused on you two.

Suguru snatched the remote from your hand, prompting you to glare at him. “Give it back.”

“No,” he said, tucking the remote into his pocket. “Not until we talk.”

“Suguru—”

“I’m sorry,” he blurted, interrupting your words. “I’m sorry how I’ve been acting. Can we just talk? Please?”

You were rendered speechless, his apology surprising you. Just an hour ago, he was too hard-headed to give in. You didn’t know what caused his change of heart, but whatever it was, you were thankful for it. You missed him. Yet, you know you couldn’t give in so quickly. As much as you wanted to fall into his arms and forget about the past few days, you knew you had to hold your ground. If you gave in without a proper explanation from him, he might never understand how deeply he hurt you.

So, you took a deep breath and crossed your arms, trying to appear indifferent to the pleading look in his eyes. "Okay, we can talk."

He sagged in relief and handed the remote to Takara. Without another word, he grabbed your hand and pulled you out of the room. You allowed him to do so, though his fast pace and greater height meant he was essentially dragging you behind him. You could sense his desperation, his need to make amends. That combined with your desire to get far away from the girls and the TV room, not wanting them to witness the confrontation that was sure to follow, made you keep silent.

You let him lead you through the halls and into the garden, the setting sun casting an orange glow over everything. Though the weather was warm, you felt a shiver go through you. You couldn’t help but remember the last time you were out here, and the awful reaction he had to Tsuda. He was nowhere in sight, though if you remember the time correctly, it was his working hours.

He must’ve finished things quicker today.

When Suguru finally came to a stop and turned to face you, his expression was still unreadable. Your heart raced, a combination of anxiety and excitement filling you. This was a make-or-break moment, one that’d see you and him fix things, or cause them to shatter completely. If the latter happened, you’d be crushed.

"Izumi," he started, taking a deep breath. "I'm so, so sorry. I was angry and reacted without thinking. Just the thought of you being defiled…"

He swore as his words trailed off, and his eyes darted to the ground. You remained silent, letting him gather his thoughts. After a few moments, his eyes lifted, and he met yours.

“I hate the thought of another man touching you, and I despise the fact you suffered, and I couldn’t do anything about it. I'm not excusing my behavior, but I just want you to forgive me.”

You hadn't realized how stiff your body had become until it melted, because as his apology lingered in the air, your shoulders relaxed, and the tension within you dissipated. You halfway expected more words to follow, for him to make a comment that’d derail the conversation, but none came. Doubts dwelled in the back of your mind, but you dismissed them as paranoia. You wanted to believe more than anything that his words were genuine, and it was hard to imagine a man like Suguru swallowing his pride to manipulate someone. And truth be told, you didn't want to drag things out any longer. His reaction had hurt you, yes, but you didn't want to lose him over a mistake. If his words turned out to be a farse, you'd never trust him again. For now, though, you'd choose to believe the words he spoke came from the heart.

"What you said wasn't okay," you began, reaching for his hand when you saw his shoulders sag. He quickly accepted your outstretched palm. "You hurt me, but..." You took a breath, using the moment to collect yourself. "You've done so much for me, and we all make mistakes. I want to believe you're being genuine, so I will." Your eyes met his. "But, if something like this happens again, I don't know—”

"It won't," he said, cutting off your words. "I swear, hurting you again is the last thing I want to do. Just don't shut me out again."

You nodded. “I won't.”

A smile lit his face, and he pulled you into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. The embrace was comforting, and you were soon leaning into his touch. Though a nagging feeling remained, you dismissed it as persistent hurt. You chose to ignore it to bask in this moment, just happy to have a sense of normalcy return.

Chapter Text

If Satoru’s nearly two decades of life had taught him anything, it was how to gauge someone’s character. Existing in the sordid world of Jujutsu sorcerers let him know that most people weren’t worth shit. Everyone, no matter how powerful they were, had the capability to use others and backstab. If it meant it’d advance their goals, anything was on the table. It was human nature and not even a strong bond guaranteed protection.

Once you’re betrayed by the person closest to you, you start looking at everyone with suspicion, no matter how inconspicuous they may seem. Though Satoru was too strong to be harmed physically, he knew better than to let his guard down around most people, especially when they set off alarm bells in his head. It was why he was always tense around the new student, a survivor from Kuroki who happened to have abnormally high cursed energy. If he had to guess, Satoru didn’t think he’d be able to become higher than a grade 2 sorcerer, but that was still enough to pique the elder’s interest.

Perhaps, that level of cursed energy was why Suguru had left him alive, but something was just off about Nishi Kai. He was friendly enough and hadn’t done anything offensive enough to warrant confrontation. Yet Satoru couldn’t shake the feeling that he was more of a bastard than he let on. He often wondered who the cell filled with drawings housed, and how if Nishi was privy to that information. Just the idea that the guy would allow innocent people to be locked away made Satoru dislike him. The way he looked at Shoko didn’t help matters, and even after he was called out for staring a little too hard, he persisted.

Satoru prayed he didn’t try anything with her. He and she had drifted apart since Suguru defected, but she was still a friend, and Satoru would still destroy anyone who harmed her. And in his book, infringing on someone’s boundaries was harmful.

However, if Nishi did that, he’d have a valid excuse to get rid of him.

Maybe, part of Satoru’s problem was that he constantly compared him to those he lost. Yu’s life had been cut short, Suguru had defected, and Kento was in the process of transferring to a normal school. Nishi had impossibly big shoes to fill, and he possessed none of the traits to do so. As awful as it sounded, Satoru didn’t think he’d survive for more than a year. Two, tops. Perhaps worse was the fact he didn’t care. 

If he died, oh well. Time to start looking for the next sacrifice.

For the time being, while the boy was among the living, Satoru tried to hide disdain. As suspicious as he was of the survivor, he didn’t truly think he’d pose a threat to anyone at Jujutsu Tech. Nishi was more of a hindrance than anything, a reminder of what Suguru had done and a tool to further vilify his former best friend.

Maybe, it was that constant reminder of Suguru that made Nishi so aggravating. Regardless of the reason, he couldn't stop fantasizing about a dangerous curse killing him on a mission.

He tried to cast his thoughts aside, but when left to his own devices, that was difficult to do. In the middle of the night, as he tossed and turned in Suguru’s old bed, there was little to do but think. Sometimes, he slept in his dorm and pretended that in the morning, he’d see Suguru again. In his head, he pretended that once he awoke the next morning, they’d goof off throughout class and training, go on a mission and show off, then return to school and kick back. That fantasy wasn’t always easy to conjure, and since Nishi’s arrival, it became harder. Another strike against him, as he constantly questioned why he slept in two rooms.

Only Shoko and Yaga knew that he couldn’t handle the last traces of Suguru being removed, and he wasn’t keen on growing that group.

He huffed out a breath as sleep continued to elude him. Maybe a midnight stroll would do him some good. The campus was serene at night, and being the strongest being in existence meant he didn't need as much sleep as everyone else. An extra strong mug of coffee, and he'd be chipper as always in the morning.

Deciding that a walk was the best course of action, he pulled his blanket off and swung his legs over the side of the bed.  He stood and stretched, then swapped out his boxers for sweatpants, and threw a white shirt on. Slipping on his sunglasses and shoes, he was ready to go.

At first, the quiet campus soothed Satoru, the crisp air cooling his overheated body. The mountainous location of the school meant it was spared from the summer heat, allowing spring’s perfect weather to continue well into the hottest months of the year. The blooming flowers added color to the bushes and trees, creating a gorgeous scenery he’d gotten lost in more than once. The moonlight and antique lights illuminated his way. Not that it was necessary, as his six eyes allowed him to see in the darkest areas.

By the time he returned to the dorms, he felt a million times better. A quick jump into the shower, and he’d be ready to give sleeping another go. Unfortunately, when he stepped foot into the shared restroom, lustful grunts filled the air, and a horrendous sight greeted him.

Nishi Kai was jacking off in the restroom. Worse, he didn’t have the decency to go into a stall, instead choosing to masturbate by the sinks. His hands gripped the countertop, and his head was thrown back and eyes closed, not even bothering to be aware of his surroundings.

And (un)luckily for Satoru, he walked in just in time to see Nishi blow his load.

“What the fuck?” Satoru exclaimed as white ropes hit the sinks.

Nishi's head snapped toward Satoru, his eyes the size of saucers. “Shit...I'm sorry. I had to rub one out, and no one was around—”

"I don't give a shit!” Satoru snapped, cutting him off. “You have a room.”

The other boy winced, his face reddening.

“I got caught up in the moment,” Nishi said, a poor attempt to defend him. He grabbed some paper towels and began cleaning himself off. “I couldn’t sleep, and I started thinking, then my thoughts got to my cock, and—”

Satoru groaned and rubbed his temples. “I really don’t care. Just don’t do this shit again.”

“C’mon, man, I’m sure you’ve done something similar.”

“Nope.”

Neither Satoru nor Suguru had stooped low enough to masturbate in a public bathroom’s sink. Quickies in single-use public bathrooms? Sure. Jacking off in the showers and toilet stalls? You bet. But sinks? Never.  He had standards, unlike Nishi.

Nishi tossed his used paper towels into the trash, then washed his hands, using the soapy water to clean his cum. Satoru made a mental note to bleach that sink, even if his infinity would prevent germs from touching him. Once Nishi was all cleaned up, he gave Satoru a sheepish smile, as if his lack of self-control was something to be forgiven.

But the damage was already done, and the incident just made Satoru dislike Nishi even more.

When it became clear his attempt to brush things off wouldn't work, Nishi's smile faltered, and he cleared his throat.

"Can I explain myself?" he asked.

"No, you can't," Satoru replied without a second thought.

"Look, I know you don't like me, and—"

Satoru snorted, uncaring that the sound again interrupted Nishi. “That’s putting it lightly.”

“You’ve been standoffish and rude. I know you’re grieving or whatever, and I get it, but—”

“No, you don’t,” Satoru said, hoping he’d eventually get a clue and shut the fuck up. “I don’t want to hear whatever bullshit you have to say.”

Nishi clenched his jaw, irritation filling his eyes. “It’s not bullshit, and if anything, I think you owe me an explanation as to why you’re such a dick.”

His insult tempted Satoru to invoke violence, but he managed to keep his cool. Instead, he obliged Nishi’s request.

“An explanation? Gladly. I don’t trust you; I think you’re a weak bastard, I don’t like how you look at Shoko, you’re annoying, and I see right through the act you’re putting up. Put simply, I wish you never came to this school.”

Nishi froze, shock and annoyance flashing across his face. “What act? And how do I look at Shoko?”

Satoru crossed his arms. “You’re a fake. One of the buildings left standing in Kuroki was a fucking cell, with drawings, some by children. I bet you know something about that shit.” The alarm on his face almost made Satoru chuckle, his expression confirming what he already knew. “Furthermore, you look at Shoko like she’s a piece of meat, always fucking ogling her.”

Nishi sneered and leaned against the sink, mimicking his senior when he crossed his arms. “Don’t act like you haven’t fucked her or thought about it. She’s hot with nice tits.”

A snarl spread across Satoru’s lips, his fingers twitching. In a flash, Nishi was pinned to the wall, Satoru’s forearms applying pressure to the boy’s throat. It’d take a second to kill him.

“You’re a pathetic little bastard,” he spat. “Try anything with her, and I’ll tear your head off.”

Nishi didn’t respond to his threat, his eyes wide and face pale. After several tense seconds, he gulped and nodded, understanding that Satoru was serious. It took a moment for Satoru to release him, as he was still considering ending him. But, as much as the younger man pissed him off, murdering him over some vile words wouldn’t go over well with the elders.

The blue-eyed boy released him, glaring as the other gasped for air. “Get the hell out of here before I change my mind.”

Once he caught his breath, Kai hurried away and slipped out of the bathroom, leaving Satoru to stew in his rage. After he got ahold of his temper, he stalked to the showers, hoping the hot water would see the return of his relaxation.

Chapter Text

As soon as Suguru heard your soft gasp, he became alarmed. When you began to tremble and your shadow emerged, he knew something was very wrong. In all the time you’d accompanied him during his healing sessions, you barely reacted. But the lanky dark-haired man had you frozen in fear, eyes wide and mouth agape. Likewise, his eyes were glued to you, equally as shocked. His gaze switched between you and Suguru, apprehension entering his face.

“Well?” Suguru said, his tone sharp. “Speak.”

He was considering calling Manami to remove you from the room as he dealt with him, similarly as he had with Ose. It was clear the two of you knew each other, and considering you’d been imprisoned in a remote village before Suguru had saved you, that wasn’t a good thing. The man’s absence from the cell meant he was one of the people who had tormented you, one of the (un)lucky souls who’d survived Suguru’s wrath.

That was a mistake he’d remedy today.

The guy cleared his throat and began to back away. “Never mind. This…this was a mistake.”

Both you and Suguru stood, and to both men’s shock, you were the first to react. In the blink of an eye, your protective shadow emerged, flinging the guy into a wall. He groaned as he landed with a bang, then yelped when the blue entity pinned him down.

Suguru chuckled. Pussy.

He knew your shadow was nothing to be trifled with, but the guy’s whining was unwarranted.

“How are you alive?” you barked, though it was impossible to miss the way your voice shook. “Y-you’re supposed to be dead.” Your head whirled in Suguru’s direction, your teary gaze almost accusing. “I thought you killed him!”

“Sweetheart,” Suguru said slowly, approaching you with his hands held up to make it clear he meant no harm. “Do you want him dead?”

“He was already supposed to be dead!” you replied, on the verge of having a panic attack, your breathing uneven.

Your answer and emotional reaction clued onto the man’s identity.

Kai.

Your perverted captor who took more than you were willing to give and abused his power over you.

For the first time in years, Suguru had no desire to summon a curse to do his dirty work. Instead, he wanted to end the bastard personally. He’d relish getting his hands dirty and may even bathe in his blood to celebrate his death. He wanted to look Kai in the eye and watch life drain from them. He had a score to settle and wouldn’t allow a curse to taint his vengeance.

But first, he needed to calm you down.

Suguru reached for your arm, causing you to flinch. However, he persisted and gently pulled you toward him. You remained stiff, though allowing him to guide you to his side.

“It’s okay,” he murmured once you were in his arms, running a hand over your hair. “Just breathe. I’ll handle him.”

You took a shaky breath and nodded, though your shadow didn't retreat. Kai remained pinned to the floor, swearing as he was rendered immobile.

"I heard about you and wanted to see if the hype was true," Kai said, his words rushed. "I don't mean any harm, I swear."

Suguru snorted, unconvinced.

"I won't let him near you," he promised when he felt you tremble again. "Trust me."

You gave him a curt nod, leaning into his embrace. "Okay."

It took several minutes for your shaking to subside, the time spent with Suguru holding you as he whispered sweet nothings. It was a testament to your strength that you weren't completely falling apart, and Suguru couldn’t help but admire you. He’d fallen apart when trauma got the best of him, yet with your victimizer feet away and squirming beneath your shadow, you managed to regain composure within minutes.

"Izumi, do you want to say anything to him?" he asked, his thumb rubbing your shoulder. "Or should we just kill him?"

"No," you answered, surprising him. You looked up at him, your tears having been replaced with a hard glare. “I want him to suffer.”

A smirk formed on his lips, and he turned to the squirming man.

"Gladly."

It was easy to summon a curse, one that’d ensure Kai would be rendered mute. A worm-like creature crawled out of a portal, heading straight for Kai. Though he didn’t want the creature killing him, he’d be happy to let it assist.

“What the fuck?” he yelled as the thing lunged at him, letting out a muffled scream as the creature latched onto his face.

He thrashed and bucked, but Suguru’s curse was unbreakable. Unless Kai killed it, there’d be no escape. Suguru began to walk towards Kai, rolling his eyes as muffled sobs left him. The guy really was a pussy. He wondered how many times you sobbed and begged for mercy, and if it ever made a difference. Just the thought had Suguru’s blood boiling.

He knelt beside the man and grabbed his face, forcing his head back.  The worm was still attached, writhing, and pulsating as it did its job. Your shadow had yet to retreat, the negative emotions swirling through you keeping it alive and strong. Kai stared at him with wide eyes, a tear slipping down his cheek.

"Pathetic," Suguru murmured. He looked back at you. "Anything specific you want, sweetheart?"

You hesitated, then shook your head. "Just make him suffer. I want his final moments to be miserable."

Suguru chuckled, your ruthless words sending a spark of arousal through him. "Got it."

Without warning, he ripped the worm from Kai's face, prompting him to gasp for air. He tried to speak, but no words came out.

"What was that, fucker?" Suguru taunted, squeezing his cheeks. "We can't hear you."

Kai's eyes darted to you, the expression on your face making him pale. “I'm sorry. I-I was a stupid boy, and—”

"Funny," Suguru said, cutting him up. "Because I was a stupid boy once, and I never assaulted anyone."

Kai gulped, unable to refute his point.

“You know, I always carry a blade on me,” Suguru said causally, grabbing the man's head and tilting it back, forcing him to meet his gaze. “Jujutsu Tech taught me to always be prepared. They probably taught you the same thing, but you’re too much of a dumbass to heed the lesson.”

It was just a guess that Kai was sent by the school. He might’ve genuinely just heard about Suguru via word of mouth but seeing as Jujutsu Tech had stumbled upon the destroyed village, he’d bet that they recruited any promising survivors. If his cursed energy was anything to go off, Kai was promising enough to catch attention.

“Tell me,” Suguru began, pulling a dagger out of one of his robe’s pockets. The way Kai whimpered nearly made him laugh.  “Did the school send you?”

Kai nodded.

Suguru snorted. "Figures.” He dragged the blade along his cheek, just deep enough to cut. “Well, they're going to be disappointed when I send them your fucking head.”

Kai's eyes widened, and he started shaking his head. "Please, I'll never bother you again."

Suguru tsked, sighing heavily in mock regret. “She made her wish pretty clear. She wants you to suffer, and who am I to refuse her? Because unlike you, I care about what she wants.” Without warning, Suguru plunged the blade into Kai’s shoulders, his scream making him grin. “You're going to pay for everything you've done.”

He pulled the blade out and held it to his neck, then looked back at you. “If you need to leave, sweetheart, that’s fine. I have it handled.”

You shook your head, walking closer instead of leaving. “I want to watch.”

Goddamn, he was a sick fuck, because your words had his cock twitching.

“Okay. I’ll have Manami clear my schedule, so we can handle him. Sound good?”

“Yeah,” you said quietly, aiming a death glare at Kai. “Sounds great.”

******

As the hours dragged on, Kai’s thrashing turned into pathetic squirms, his screams and pleas turning into incoherent whimpers. Still, Suguru continued his torture, with you by his side. Particularly bothersome pleas were met with violence from you, slaps, kicks, spit, etc. Manami poked her head in every now and then, cringing as Kai’s state became worse and worse.

Suguru was careful not to kill him, carving and stabbing in a way that caused pain, but kept him alive. Both you and him were splattered with blood, and Kai’s body was red and mangled.

When Kai’s eyes began to grow heavy, and Suguru’s hard slaps and punches weren’t enough to reawaken him, the blade was raised. Before it could sink into the column of his throat, you grabbed Suguru’s wrist. 

“I wanna do it,” you said quietly, your words making Suguru pause.

After a moment, he nodded and handed you the blade. It felt heavy in your hand, and you couldn't help but tense when you thought about what you were about to do. Still, you persisted. Your movements were shaky, but with a swift motion, Kai's throat was sliced. You felt Suguru's stare burn into you as you ended your abuser's life, your breathing growing heavier as he took his last gurgled breath. Once it was clear he was gone, you dropped the blade and began to sob.

Suguru gathered you into his arms. "Come, let's get you cleaned up."

You buried your face in his chest, allowing him to guide you out of the room. It was the last time you saw Kai, and despite the tears streaming down your face, you couldn't be happier. You were finally free.

Before the two of you left the room, Suguru summoned some leech-like curses, letting them dispose of the mess. You cringed as you heard the wet, squelching crunch, but it was somewhat of a comfort knowing it was Kai they were eating.

“Are you okay?” Suguru asked as he carried you.

You nodded because, despite everything, you felt lighter than you had in a while. 

Suguru made his way to your shared quarters, taking the less-used hallways to avoid running into one. Namely, the girls and Takara, as you didn’t want to explain what transpired. 

He hauled you straight into the bathroom once you reached your destination. He set you on your feet and helped you out of your soiled clothes. You returned the favor, undoing the belt to his robe. You can tell it shocked him, but he allowed you to do so. Once you were both nude, he guided you to the shower and stepped in after you. He turned the water on and let it heat up for a moment, before grabbing the detachable showerhead to wash your body. The water ran pink as he rinsed the blood off, but once your flesh was free of red stains, he began lathering up a washcloth with soap.

“Is it your hair day?” he asked before he brought the cloth to your body.

You smiled and shook your head. He knew you didn’t wash your hair daily, as you found your hair was happier when you let some days pass.

“Not yet,” you answered, sagging as he cleaned your flesh.

His tenderness made his heart swell, and though his actions were gentle, they were methodical. There was nothing sexual about them, and you were immensely grateful that he wasn’t using your vulnerable state as an opportunity to make a move. Once you were clean, you swiped the cloth. You quickly rinsed it off, then mimicked Suguru when you began to wash him.

Once you both were free of grime, the two of you just stood under the warm water. He kept some distance between y’all, but you stepped closer, wrapping your arms around his waist and resting your head on his chest.

“Thank you,” you said quietly, a fuzzy feeling coursing through you when he returned your embrace.

He kissed the top of your head, pulling a content sigh from you. “No need to thank me, sweetheart. It was the least I could do.”

You nuzzled your face into his chest, your heart swelling with gratitude.

“Suguru?” you murmured into his skin as the minutes ticked by.

“Hmm?”

“Remember when I came back from the mall, how you touched me?”

He tensed but nodded. “Yeah.”

You dragged your head from his chest, looking into his eyes. “Do it again?”

His breath hitched. Anxiety trickled through you, and you pondered if you should introduce anything sexual to the quiet intimacy the two of you were sharing. Yet, you didn’t want your most erotic experience with Suguru to be marred by a panic attack, nor did you want an abusive dead man to be the one who’d gotten the furthest with you. Moreover, you felt ready for more. Maybe you were still riding the high of Kai’s death, but even if that was the case, you wanted to take advantage of that feeling to advance your relationship with Suguru.

“Are you sure?” he asked, his hands stroking your arm.

You nodded, kissing his pec. “I am.” 

At your confirmation, his hand cupped your breast. Your breath hitched as his fingers massaged the fatty tissue, a soft whimper leaving when he began rolling your nipple around with his thumb.

“Let me know if it’s too much,” he said as his other hand slid between your thighs.

“Okay,” you breathed out, moaning as his fingers began to rub circles over your clit.

Suguru didn’t rush things, slowly pleasing you as he waited for a signal that you needed him to stop. However, when the only sound that came from you was moans and whimpers, he continued to play with your sensitive body. You gripped his shoulder, gasping as he sank a finger inside. You couldn't help but tremble, your core tightening around him.

"Keep going," you whispered, biting your lip.

He obliged, pushing another finger inside and curling it upward. "Like that, baby?"

"Uh-huh," you managed, whimpering when he started pumping his fingers.

A few strokes and his digits were coated with your juices. His pace remained consistent, and as his other hand continued to fondle your breasts, you could feel your climax building.

"Don't stop," you begged, bucking your hips against his hand.

He chuckled and continued pleasuring you. After several moments, you couldn't take it anymore, and you began to shake as your orgasm crashed over you. As a loud moan escaped you, you grabbed his soaking strands and guided his lips to yours, his mouth muffling the sounds flowing from you. Your climax was powerful, and he worked you through it until your body grew still and your panting died down.

"Wow," you gasped once your kiss ended, your voice weak and wispy.

"Felt good?" he teased, a smirk tugging at his lips.

You giggled, burying your face into his chest as you nodded. "Yeah. Thanks."

The water was starting to run cold, prompting the two of you to step out. Suguru wrapped a towel around his waist, then grabbed a second one for you. Fifteen minutes later, the two of you were curled up on the couch, watching a movie on your quarter's television. You were practically on his lap, and he kept an arm around your waist. Occasionally, he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, earning a smile each time he did. Your cuddling was far from sexual, but it was sweet, intimate, and everything you needed after the day's events.

******

A month later, you were ready to progress things. Fingering and handjobs had become a part of your routine, but over the last week, you were left wanting more. Though it was fun and pleasurable, you craved to feel his mouth on you, to have his length inside of you, to feel his heat and the weight of his body pressing you down into the mattress.

So, as you came down from your high after the two of you fooled around before bed, you spoke up.

"Suguru…I'm ready," you said, still a little breathless from your orgasm.

He cocked a brow. "Ready for what, sweetheart?"

You licked your lips and turned to face him.

"I want you inside me," you whispered, deciding not to beat around the bush. His eyes grew to the size of saucers when you straddled him. After a moment of hesitation, his hands moved to your waist. “I want to feel your mouth on me. I want to go all the way.”

“Shit,” he breathed out, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. “You’re serious.”

His words weren’t a question, but a statement, one you confirmed with a nod. “Deadly.”

You could feel his cock twitch beneath you, the thought of him being inside you turning him on. Good. He wanted it as much as you did.

He rubbed his thumbs over your waist, his breathing growing heavier. "Are you sure? We can wait longer if you're not—"

"I'm sure," you said, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his lips, earning a groan as he pulled you close.

His hands moved from your waist to your back, stroking the soft skin as you two made out. You rocked against his hardness as your lips locked, the friction making you moan into his mouth. When you finally broke the kiss, both of you were panting and eager to progress.

Your positions were quickly flipped, with you pinned beneath him. A sliver of uneasiness went through you, but you reminded yourself that you were safe. One word, and he'd stop. So, you took a deep breath, forcing yourself to relax as he lifted the oversized shirt you wore.

"It's okay," he said as your chest became exposed to his hungry eyes. "I'll be gentle."

You could only nod, your breath hitching as his mouth latched onto your tits. He switched between them, sucking and nibbling the sensitive flesh. The pressure of his mouth sent sparks of pleasure throughout your body. Your legs instinctively parted, allowing him to settle between them.

"Please," you begged, your pussy growing moist again.

"Hold on, sweetheart. Let me savor this," he murmured, his mouth still latching onto your breasts.

You whined, bucking your hips. "Please, I can't wait any longer."

Your words prompted him to release your nipple and sit up, his hands reaching for the elastic of your panties as he chuckled. "Impatient little thing."

Once your cunt was exposed to him, he didn't free his cock. Instead, he kissed down your body, not stopping until his head was between your thighs.

"Please," you said again, wriggling as his tongue flicked your clit.

You mewled as he sucked the bundle of nerves into his mouth, the sensation making your back arch. When your hips bucked, his hands were quick to pin you down. He licked along your slit, his thumb coming down to rub your clit. You could barely keep still as he greedily lapped at your sex, his tongue delving into your wet heat. It was impossible to keep quiet, his mouth feeling too good. His name spilled from your lips, and you gripped his inky strands as he brought you closer and closer to the edge.

"Suguru, don't stop," you panted, your eyes rolling back. "I'm close!"

"Then come for me, sweetheart," he murmured, his mouth vibrating against you.

As he pushed a finger inside your dripping pussy, the knot in your stomach unraveled. You let out a strangled cry as you came, his hungry mouth not relenting as he ate you through your orgasm. When he finally lifted his head, his lips were slick with your juices, his eyes hooded and ravenous.

"You taste fucking amazing," he purred, his tongue darting out to collect your stray sap.

"Need you," you moaned.

Despite two orgasms in short succession, your body was buzzing, craving more. He didn't have to be told twice, quickly freeing his length from its cloth confines, his tip leaking and begging for attention. He positioned himself at your entrance, the head of his dick brushing against your sensitive hole and making you whimper.

"Tell me if it's too much," he murmured, his eyes boring into yours.

You nodded, your hands gripping his broad shoulders. "Please, put it in."

He didn't hesitate, finally sinking inside you. A hiss slipped past his lips as his cock was enveloped by your wet heat. A sharp gasp left you. The stretch burned, and your muscles clenched around him.

"Relax," he murmured, stroking your thighs. "Just breathe."

You did as he asked, taking a deep breath, and allowing him to sink deeper. After what felt like an eternity, he eventually bottomed out, his hips pressed flush against yours. By then, you were a whimpering mess, feeling fuller than ever before.

"Good girl," he praised, his hands running over your skin. "You feel so fucking good."

He rolled his hips, making you moan. Your nails dug into his skin. His thrusts were shallow and gentle, and as the sting faded, the pressure in your core made you desperate for more.

"Please, harder," you begged, uncaring how whiny you sounded.

You wrapped a leg around his waist, hoping that'd encourage him to comply with your request. He grunted, his hands grabbing your waist and holding you in place as a swear slipped from him. You mewled as he started to pound into you, his thrusts becoming harder and faster, just like you wanted. His cockhead was now bullying that spongy spot deep inside you, making staying quiet an impossible challenge.

"Fuck, you're so tight," he groaned, his grip on your waist tightening. "Can't wait to cum inside you."

"Yes, please!"

"Yeah?" he repeated, his thrusts growing sloppier and more desperate. "Want me to cum inside?  Want me to breed this pussy, hmm, sweetheart? Want me to mark you as mine?"

Your response to his babbling was a frantic nod, your hands clawing at his shoulders. As fucked out as you were, a part of you relished the idea of carrying his child, a symbol of his love and a way to stay by his side forever.

He kept the angle, hitting your sweet spot over and over. You could barely form a coherent thought, let alone speak. All you could do was moan, and it wasn't long before your walls were clenching around him.

"Fuck, gonna cum," he grunted, his thrusts becoming sloppy.

"Me too," you whimpered, feeling a familiar tightening in your core.

When you came, it was powerful, and a scream tore from your throat. Your pussy throbbed, and you could feel his hot seed spurting into your unprotected cunt. Once both of you were milked dry, he collapsed on top of you, panting and sweaty.

"Fuck," he groaned, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. "That was amazing."

You could only nod and stroke his hair as you basked in the afterglow. The two of you were nothing short of filthy, but neither of you cared.

"Love you," you murmured, kissing his chest.

"Love you too," he replied, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

He rolled off you and gathered you into his arms. Like you, he was in no wash to clean off. It seemed as if he just wanted to hold you, and you couldn't be happier. After everything the two of you had been through, this moment of tenderness and intimacy was exactly what you needed.

Chapter Text

“I came to declare war,” Suguru announced causally, uncaring that a group of jujutsu sorcerers stood ready to attack.

You did, though. Their stances had you on edge, and you positioned yourself in front of the twins. They were a few years shy of adulthood, but you were still protective of them, something you doubted would ever change. Knowing that the strongest sorcerer was inches away from your husband made you even tenser. Your shadow was moving all about, catching the attention of some of the sorcerers.

“Everyone gathered here today,” Suguru continued, his voice rising in volume. “I want you all to open your ears and listen closely. On December 24th, when the sun sets, we shall begin the Night Parade of 100 Demons. At the crucible of curses, Tokyo, Shinjuku.”

 His words worsened the tension. A young sorcerer who must’ve been fresh out of Jujutsu Tech charged, earning a shout from the older brunette man with sunglasses. However, before they even got a foot closer to Suguru, you directed your shadow to them. It hit them square in the chest, sending them flying across the courtyard. The blue entity caught the attention of multiple people and nearly caused the physical violence to escalate.  

Suguru tsked and looked at you. “Now, was that necessary?”

You shrugged, tensing as too many pairs of eyes glared at you. Your mouth dried, and words escaped you. It became a struggle to keep up your stoic persona, but somehow, you managed.

The strongest—Gojo Satoru—stared particularly hard. His stark white hair and height were too striking for you to forget. The forgotten incident at the candy store all those years ago resurfaced in your mind, and your eyes went wide when you realized you’d met him before. 

Talk about a small world.

His eyes narrowed, and though his blindfold covered his gaze, you could sense him scrutinizing you. It didn't take long for him to piece things together, his jaw clenching as the realization sank in.

 “Now, now,” Suguru said, a little less chipper as he noticed Gojo’s staring. Thankfully, his words redirected attention. “There’s no need for things to get physical. We were just on our way.”

He looked at the group he brought with him and waved a hand, signaling to return to the pelican curse that delivered everyone. Just as you did when he unveiled the thing, you cringed as you stepped into the oversized beak, and waited anxiously for Suguru to join you all. Once he did, you relaxed.

“Remember, December 24th. Don’t forget,” he called as the bird lifted off, taking you all to safety.

As soon as you landed, you let out a shaky breath. "That was fucking terrifying," you muttered, scurrying out of the curse as quickly as possible.

"Sorry, sweetheart," Suguru apologized, his lips quirking. "But I had to get their attention. And you can't blame me for enjoying a bit of drama."

You sighed, shaking your head. Your husband had a flare for the dramatic, and it was only growing worse as the years passed. By the time you two were in your thirties, he'd be a certified theater actor.

If you two lived that long.

The unwanted thought sent a shiver down your spine. Being involved with curses, rather as a curse user or Jujutsu Sorcerer, was dangerous work. And seeing as Suguru had just challenged the entirety of Jujutsu Tech to a showdown, the risks were quite high. You prayed everyone near and dear to you lived to see the new year.

Suguru's smile slipped as he noticed your change of mood. "Sweetheart, it'll be okay."

His reassurance made you feel a little better, as it always did. After so many years together, he'd acquired the ability to read you like a book.

"We need a backup plan," you muttered.

If things went bad, you wanted to know there'd be a chance for everyone to get out alive.

"This is an all-or-nothing thing," Suguru said, earning a glower.

"Then it'll be nothing because I'm not losing anyone. Most especially you."

"Baby, it's a risk, but a necessary one. We can't let this world continue as it is."

You strongly disagreed. You'd come to accept you were a selfish woman, one who'd put herself and her loved ones above everyone else.

"Why can't we just run away if things get too bad? Why does it have to be all or nothing?"

He pulled you into his arms, his chest pressing against yours. "Because this world is cruel, and until something changes, it's doomed to repeat itself. We have a chance to make a difference, and we have to take it."

"I'm not asking you to call it off. Just to have a backup plan."

He pressed a kiss to your forehead, a gesture that always brought you comfort. "Fine. We'll think of something."

His heavy sigh hinted he wasn’t too pleased with the idea, but relief still swamped you at your agreement, allowing you to relax in his hold. "Good."

He chuckled as you nuzzled into him. For a moment, the looming threat of war was forgotten, and all that mattered was each other, and everyone near and dear to you. But despite Suguru's reassurance, the presence of your loved ones felt a little sweeter, knowing it could be the last time you saw them.

******

Satoru didn’t consider himself a sentimental man. He’d learned the hard way that caring too much could lead to a world of hurt. Even with his wards—who’d he kill for if needed—he kept up walls. Being vulnerable had too many risks, and he’d rather be perceived as an immature jackass than leave himself open to any kind of damage, even if only emotional. 

But, fuck, Satoru might have to evaluate how he saw himself. When he asked a very badly wounded Suguru to mutter his last words, he didn’t think he’d confess to having a wife and two adopted daughters.

"The woman that was with you...that was her?" Satoru asked quietly, thinking back to the shadow wielder, the one that was so familiar.

If only he could place his finger on where he’d seen her.

Suguru's smile grew, and if they were in a cartoon, his eyes would be hearts. "Isn't she amazing?"

That wasn't the way he'd describe her but to each their own.

"Uh-huh. She seems lovely."

His voice was dripping with sarcasm, but his injured friend didn't seem to notice.

"She is. And she's the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Despite everything, Satoru's heart ached at his words. He knew you were likely a terrible bitch, but he couldn't help but wonder how long you'd mourn your husband. Would you move on, or were you devoted enough to spend the rest of your days as an old spinster?

Fuck, how would the kids you two had taken under your wings react?

 He didn't have to ponder for long, as Satoru found himself being flung back. A blue flash gave him a hint of the culprit, and he quickly jumped back to avoid a second hit.

It took him a moment to realize you'd hit him as all, but when it sunk in, he felt dread. Because, fuck, your shadow had penetrated his infinity. It made sense, as shadows cast by the sun touched him. Yet, he never thought about the danger that could pose, as he never expected to find someone who could manipulate them. Or in your case, manipulate a special blue shadow that was vaguely humanoid.

His mistake, as after all these years, he should know to expect the unexpected. He especially should've known Suguru would bag a special-grade wife.

“Get the fuck away from him,” you snarled, undeterred by his dodging.

You used the opportunity to inch closer to Suguru, whose grin had been wiped off his face. Instead, he looked concerned.

"Stop," he rasped, reaching out to you.

"I'm not letting him hurt you anymore," you said, not even bothering to look at him.

Neither man bothered correcting that it was Rika and Yuta who’d done most of the harm, not Satoru.

Your shadow was consistent, moving every time Satoru did. It was only a matter of time before it struck again. Satoru knew he couldn't keep dodging forever. And if he didn't think fast, he'd end up like his former friend, mangled with broken bones.

Maybe, he should just kill you, eliminating the problem from the source.

"Baby, please," Suguru begged, as if sensing Satoru’s thoughts. "It's over. Just go."

You looked at him like he was crazy. "And let you die?"

Your shadow lunged again. Satoru dodged but kept a close eye on it. It suddenly made sense why Suguru's injuries weren't a death sentence, as the movements of your technique reminded him of Rika. He must've had experience with it, allowing him to lessen the damage the Queen of Curses inflicted. Sure, his mangled arm, injured leg, and roughed-up face certainly must’ve been painful, but he’d survive, curtsy of you.

Suguru had hit the jackpot with you.

Good for him.

Once he got the hang of how your shadow attacked, it was simple to out-maneuver it. The blue flames that shot at him were an alarming development, but still, nothing he couldn't survive. Eventually, your technique died down, which you barely seemed to spot due to your fretting over Suguru.

You must've truly believed your technique would fend off the strongest sorcerer.

Cute.

So consumed with Suguru’s injuries, you didn’t immediately notice that your shadow had failed at protection duties. Only when Satoru loomed over the two of you did you tense. You attempted to glare, but it was easy to see the fear in your eyes. Still, you positioned yourself in front of your banged-up husband.

“Satoru,” Suguru crooked, the cocky smile he’d been sporting for most of the evening replaced with panic. “Don’t hurt her.”

Despite everything, he hesitated. You two had declared war on Jujutsu Tech, fucked with his students, and nearly ended several of his comrades’ lives. Not to mention, whatever havoc you two wrecked over the last decade. Truth be told, he’d likely be doing the world a service killing you both.

Still, even knowing that Satoru fucking hesitated.

Two central reasons caused him to falter.

One, whether he liked it or not, Satoru was a sentimental man. That sentimentality caused him to remember the good ole days, when Suguru was a friend and not a foe. To this day, the strongest still considered him his best friend. The ties that bound them were impossible to destroy, and at this point, he didn’t think he wanted to.

The second was your abnormally high cursed energy. It was easy to guess you were powerful, but right now, the energy emitting from you would make you one of the strongest beings in existence. You were a special grade, no doubt, but not powerful enough to have such an aura. The explanation for such a phenomenon was simple. The energy was centered in your abdomen. He removed his bandages, using his six eyes to confirm his suspicion. Lo and behold, two embryos were growing inside you. If he had to guess, he’d say you were two months along, right around the time most women discovered their pregnancies, and when the embryos start developing their organs, transforming into fetuses.

He chuckled as he wrapped his bandages around his eyes, unable to stop the sound from escaping. Of all things, relief flooded him, as the baby growing inside you gave him a valid reason not to end the person dearest to him. Because why should an innocent life suffer for the crimes of its parents?

“Congratulations,” he said, already cooking up lies to feed to the elders.

If you two were smart and fled somewhere far, far away, it’d be much easier to do so.

At your confused looks, he continued, focusing on his best friend. “You didn’t tell me you were going to be a father.”

It took a moment, but your confused fear soon transformed into shock.

“What?” Suguru crooked, his eyes going wide as he realized what was said.

“I suggest you take everyone you care about and go far, far away. One peep from either of you, I won’t be so kind next time.”

 Without another word, Satoru took his leave, disappearing in the blink of an eye, leaving you and Suguru to figure some shit out.

******

The immediate effect of Gojo’s words was a shocked silence. You were the first to snap out of it, realizing every minute Suguru spent untreated, the more challenging his recovery would be.

“A baby,” he muttered as he hauled him up, allowing him to rest most of his weight onto you. A big hand came down on your belly, making you jump a little. “We’re going to have a baby.”

It spoke volumes that Suguru was willing to believe Gojo without any confirmation. Even knowing about his six-eye technique, you wouldn’t be fully convinced until you had some positive pregnancy tests in your hands.

For now, though, you just nodded. “Yeah.”

He wore a dopey smile the entire trip back to the temple. Somehow, he’d managed to summon a curse to escape, though it nearly took all his energy. By the time you two returned, he was only half-conscious. A quick headcount revealed that everyone but Miguel was present. Your heart sank, fearing the worst, but you pushed it aside. Instead, you barked some orders. Within ten minutes, Suguru was being fretted over by healers. He was bad off. If his injuries were any worse, he would’ve died. You stayed by his side, watching closely as he was worked on. It took until the early hours of the morning, but they confirmed he’d make a recovery.

The relief you felt was indescribable.

It was another week until your pregnancy was mentioned again. You wondered if Suguru remembered his friend’s announcement, or if he chucked it up to half-delirious delusions. You recalled it vividly, though. It lingered in the back of your mind, never quite leaving your head. Somehow, you let it slip to Manami. She took your mumbled confession as a request for pregnancy tests. The twins caught wind and practically dragged you to the bathroom to get confirmation.

“Well?” Nanako called from the other side of the door.

It took you nearly a minute to respond, too caught up in staring at the positive test in your hand. Your silence prompted a knock.

“What’s the results?” Mimiko asked, her voice soft.

Taking a breath, you opened the door, allowing the girls to enter the bathroom.  The twins gasped as your gloved hand held up the tests you'd taken, before a squeal burst from Nanako, bouncing off the tiled walls. Mimiko was more subdued in her excitement, the corners of her mouth quirking up as offered a quiet, "Congrats."

You couldn't help but smile. For a moment, you forgot that your lives would have to be uprooted to retain some normalcy, that the dream your husband had been pursuing for a decade would have to be forgotten. Instead, all you could think about was ways to confirm to Suguru that he'd be a daddy.

******

Suguru was a bit of a germaphobe. He couldn’t help it, always being surrounded by monkeys. The result was him having sprays, sanitizer, and wipes on hand always, to wipe away germs when he couldn’t access soap and water. Yet, disgust was the last sensation he felt as you held up pissy sticks. They were contained in a plastic bag, and you reassured him that you’d washed your hands, keeping things sanitary. However, at that moment, he couldn’t care less about that. All he could focus on was the fact that you were carrying his child, that the hazy memory of Satoru’s announcement truly happened.

The urge to hold you and kiss you was overwhelming, and despite the bandages wrapped around him, he gave in, yanking you into his arms. You squealed and dropped the bag.

“Suguru, be careful! Your injuries—”

He cut you off with a kiss.

Fuck the injuries. They were irrelevant at that moment. Currently, all that mattered was you and the child you were carrying.

His child.

When the kiss ended, you were breathless, your cheeks flushed. You were always beautiful, and your looks were accentuated when you were flustered.

He leaned his forehead against yours. "Thank you," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.

Your brows furrowed. "For what?"

"For giving me a family. For saving my life."

If it weren't for the baby inside your womb, Suguru doubted Satoru would've shown as much mercy. Even if he hadn't realized it, his students had usurped Suguru in Satoru's heart, and the fact they were targeted was a crime that wouldn't have been easily forgiven if an innocent, budding life wasn't involved.

You gave him a soft smile, your eyes growing glossy as you brought a hand to his cheek. He turned his head and pressed a kiss to your palm, earning a giggle.

"You don't need to thank me," you said after some seconds ticked by. "I'd do anything for you."

The words struck a chord in him, and his chest swelled with love. You'd said it a million times, but he never grew tired of hearing your sweet declarations of love and devotion.

He leaned forward and kissed you again, the pain in his arm and leg dulling as he basked in the moment. His world felt a little brighter, the sting of his loss fading. The darkness that lingered on the edge of his vision seemed to fade, and his heart was a little lighter. He hadn't realized how much fatherhood was something he wanted until now, but the thought of holding a little bundle of joy had him giddy.

Were his dreams of ushering in a new world forgotten? Not even close. Would he put them on the back burner to have a family with you and protect those near and dear to y'all hearts? Most definitely.

Maybe his near-death experience shook him up, or perhaps, it gave him much-needed clarity. Regardless of which it was, Geto Suguru came to the realization that you were his light, and there was no way in hell he'd let anything snuff it out.

The End. 

Chapter Text

So, this is incredibly different from what I typically do, but since I've been receiving hate comments, (which I will continue to delete), I figured I need to address it on here. First, I made a Tumblr post addressing this, with screenshots included.

Here's the link; https://www.tumblr.com/thee-horny-thicky/744493132982419456/final-batch-as-agreed-ill-go-back-and-change?source=share

If you don't want to leave the website to hear my side, I'll copy and post the text here, but context via screenshots will be missing. I will not be tweaking what I posted on Tumblr for AO3, so the context may not make sense, but here it is.

******

So, I'm getting hate on AO3 because Polariae and I had a falling out, and after agreeing to keep things offline, she posted some screenshots of our spat on her Instagram story. I tried to keep things professional in the notes of the story, but apparently that's 'fake niceness.' For almost a year, we chatted regularly, and I thought we were friends. The screenshots she cherry picked didn't show the hours we spent brainstorming on Savior, the jokes and TikToks shared, the little convos about our day we had. 

Now, I did swear at her, and I could've been more considerate. However, my use of the word 'bitch' has been used to express emotion, even in a friendly context. 

Now, she also said she paid me with Patreon art. This was not agreed, and the artwork she showed me was in exchange for snippets of unreleased chapters. 

Moreover, I have throughout the story the Polariae came up with Izumi. Literally in the first chapter. 

Yet, I'm getting hate from strangers because she posted our screenshots. I wasn't trying to be nice, because I was hurt at the realization that the woman that I thought was a friend only used me to write a fic, which I thought we were co-creators for. I figured since she reached out, she knew compromises would be made about her original idea.

 However, since she posted the screenshots, I'll post our last conversations in its entirety, so a conclusion can be made about what's going on by fans. Like I told her, I didn't want to delete the story because I felt it was selfish to people who invested time into the fic. But if those people want it gone, I will do so. 

As agreed, I'll go back and change Izumi's name and make some tweaks, but the core plot will remain the same. Perhaps, I'll do a new fic with a new reader insert name, because this one is now marred with drama

This entire situation is disheartening, and while I may have been a bit of a bitch, I feel it's unfair for a creator so much larger than me to send fans to attack me, without posting full context. 

******

I recommend you look at the Tumblr post for the full conversation between me and Polariae, and the other screenshots I've included. If you aren't willing to do so, please refrain from speaking on this situation, as you don't have full context.