Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Merlin had a creeping feeling that today was not going to be a good day. It was still early, the sun was just visible in the window, but he already knew what kind of day it was going to be. He was suspicious of this as he stretched in bed and felt an old scar on his back itch.

He shifted to sit up and felt his back protest the movement, the scar on the small of his back prickling as his muscles shifted. He sucked in a sharp breath between his teeth as he relaxed against the headboard. Gwaine blinked awake as Merlin resettled himself, and Merlin smiled warmly at his husband as his eyes focused.

“Good morning, gorgeous.” Merlin greeted, and kissed his forehead. Gwaine sat up and pulled Merlin into his side. “Morning, love.” Merlin curled into Gwaine as he peppered kisses along his face, earning laughter from Merlin.

“I’m half surprised to see you up so early, love.” Merlin raised an eyebrow, Gwaine had a teasing glint in his eye and Merlin knew more was coming. “After all that ruckus in the tavern last night I thought for sure you’d be sleeping off a hangover at the very least.” Merlin grinned wide, and let out a disbelieving scoff.

“You drank half of my glasses and finished all of yours!”

“Yeah but I’m not a lightweight!” Merlin stuck out his tongue and in retribution Gwaine poked him in the ribs. Merlin laughed, and retreated from the hand at his waist. It turned into a small wince when the movement aggravated his back.

Gwaine pulled his hand back quickly. “What’s wrong, Merls?” He asked, searching his face.

Merlin sighed. “The serket sting is acting up again.” He grumbled, pouting slightly.

Gwaine narrowed his eyes slightly. “Do you think you’ll need the day?” Merlin hesitated, considering. He shook his head.

“No, I’m sure I’ll be fine. It’s been worse-”

“Love” Merlin ignored the interruption and continued. “and we have to meet the druids for the solstice celebration. I’d really hate to miss it.”

Gwaine’s eyes left Merlin’s face, and scanned him, trying to find any clue that he was in pain. “As long as you’re sure.” Merlin nodded, and the pair began readying themselves for the day’s journey.
===

The whole of the Round Table was riding towards the druid camp. Merlin and Arthur’s usual banter had filled in the silence early on, and now laughter rang loudly through the group as stories were being passed around. Merlin smiled at Elyan as he was wrapping up a tale about his early days at the blacksmith forge, and shifted in the saddle, trying to ease the steadily growing pain in his back. He grimaced and let out a small huff when a sharp pain moved through his back and hip. Gwaine on his other side quickly looked over and leaned in closer.

"You doing okay, Merls?" He studied Merlin's face, "Should I ask for us to stop?" Merlin shook his head no, "I'm fine Gwaine, it’ll pass." Gwaine leaned back on his own horse but kept a close eye on his husband. Next time Merlin shifted and let out a small gasp, Gwaine was ready.

"Oi! Princess!" Arthur heaved out a groan and the round table chuckled.

"What is it, Gwaine?" Arthur looked back over his shoulder and Gwaine smiled crookedly at him.

"I vote we take a break, we've been riding for a while."

"I am your king Gwaine, you don't get a vote." Arthur joked, and Gwaine pretended to nod thoughtfully.

"No I'm pretty sure you're only a princess, and as such a noble knight, it is my solemn duty to call a break for you so her highness doesn't tire herself riding all day." Gwaine seemed very pleased with himself, and Arthur was going to retort back, but Merlin let out a tired chuckle and Arthur moved his gaze to the other man. He noticed the hunched way he sat on his horse and how close Gwaine was riding to his husband. Suddenly Arthur understood.

Arthur let out a loud sigh. "Fine, as you are so adamant, we can take a short break." Gwaine grinned brightly and turned towards Merlin. He quickly dismounted and helped Merlin do the same. Merlin sighed in a deep breath and leaned on Gwaine for a moment. Gwaine led him to a fallen log and he sat while Gwaine tied up their horses. Gwaine came to settle beside Merlin and Merlin leaned into Gwaine’s side, Gwaine brought an arm up to rest around his shoulders, his thumb rubbing comfortingly against Merlin’s arm.

“What do you need?” Gwaine whispered into Merlin’s temple, pressing a soft kiss there for good measure.

“Just you.” Merlin replied, laying a hand on Gwaine’s knee and closing his eyes, settling his head on Gwaine’s shoulder. Merlin felt a laugh tumble through Gwaine’s chest.

“That’s ridiculously sweet love, but I meant is there anything in your bag that can help?” Gwaine smiled and gestured with his free hand to the bag strapped to Merlin’s horse. Healing magic has never come naturally to Merlin, but he didn’t spend all those years as an apprentice for nothing. If he weren’t Camelot’s Court Sorcerer he would surely be her Court Physician, and he never failed to bring a kit with him on trips.

Merlin sighed softly, “Actually yeah there is.” Merlin loosely flapped a hand in the direction of his horse. “One of the round blue bottles, those are for pain. There’s also one to relieve muscle stress, but I won’t take that one since I intend to keep riding today.” He grumbled into Gwaine’s shoulder.

Gwaine slowly moved to stand, so Merlin picked his head back up while he retrieved the bottle. He sat back down and passed it to Merlin, who took two swallows of it before returning the stopper. He laced his hand in Gwaine’s.

“Is that all?” Gwaine asked quietly. Merlin hummed.

“Yeah, I don’t want to take the whole bottle. I’ll be okay, I promise.”
===

The sun was quickly disappearing behind the horizon. Merlin summoned a few balls of light to illuminate their path further. Leon spotted a good clearing to make camp soon afterwards, so Arthur called a stop to their travels for the day.

Merlin had a fire going, and let the floating lights fade. Soon they were all gathered around the fire, seated on logs or on bedrolls that had already been laid out.

Leon spoke up “Shouldn’t Arthur and Lancelot have returned by now?” The pair had gone to the nearby stream to refill the empty waterskins, and Leon had given voice to what Merlin had been thinking for a moment. Merlin stood, exhaling slowly to stifle a groan at the movement.

“I’ll go check for them, I need to cast the wards around our campsite anyway.” Gwaine stood too, fixing his scabbard back to his belt as he did so.

“I’ll join you.” Gwaine grinned at Merlin. Leon let out a long-suffering sigh, muttering to Elyan and Percival that they couldn’t wait just half a day until they could get an actual room. Merlin blushed, sending a wide-eyed look in their direction, but Gwaine just laughed and took Merlin’s hand.

“Sir Leon,” Gwaine started, placing his free hand on his heart and faking an affronted voice, “I don’t know whatever you could be implying. I am a Knight of Camelot and I am acting only out of concern for our dearest Princess.” As they left he winked at Leon and Leon groaned loudly, just placing his head in his hands, his shoulders slumped over his body. Elyan and Percival laughed at Gwaine’s antics, and Percival gently patted Leon on the shoulder twice “there-there”. In response Leon just looked up at Percival, and he looked so done with their antics that they couldn’t do anything but laugh harder.

Instead of conjuring a ball of light, Merlin let loose butterflies that glowed in front of them, gliding slowly and lighting their path in soft golden hues. Merlin leaned into Gwaine’s side as they walked to the stream, but quickly stiffened when they heard the ringing of metal ahead. Merlin’s butterflies frenzied as they ran up ahead to see Arthur and Lancelot surrounded by half a dozen dead bandits.
Arthur and Lancelot were unharmed at first glance, and Merlin let out a breath of relief.

“Are you both alright?” he asked, brightening the glow to inspect both of his friends for injuries.

“We’re fine.” Lancelot answered.

“Aww were you worried about us Mer-lin?” Arthur teased, smiling warmly at him. Merlin rolled his eyes and gave Arthur a lopsided smile.

“About you? No, I was just making sure I wouldn’t have to recast the enchantments on your armor.” Merlin gestured flippantly down at Arthur’s chainmail. Arthur froze, and his smile turned sheepish. Merlin groaned and put his hands on his hips. “I do, don’t I.”

“Maybe just a little”

“Didn’t you think to just dodge their swords, sire?” Arthur ruffled Merlin’s hair as he passed back to camp, calling behind his back.

“Just think of it as practice, wouldn’t want my Court Sorcerer getting rusty, now would I?” Merlin rolled his eyes again, and with a quick wave of his hand, the dead bandits were buried.

The group was walking back to their camp, but Merlin thought he saw something in the shadows behind them. He paused for a moment, turning to scan the trees around them. Gwaine released Merlin’s hand and put it on the hilt of his sword. Merlin took a few steps into the shadows, searching. He shrugged and turned back to Gwaine.

He took a step towards him but then felt the tip of a dagger press against his lower back, and an arm pulled tightly around his chest. Gwaine let out a shout, drawing Arthur and Lancelot’s attention. Then the world went dark.
-

It was too much. Merlin took in a gasping breath. He couldn’t hold onto his magic, and the lights vanished instantly. There was a vice around his chest. He couldn’t take in a deep enough breath. The pain in his back and the sharp point he could feel through his cloak and tunic threw him back into his memories and he fell onto his knees. There was a serket. He was sure of it. His magic crackled out of him, and the bandit was thrown.

While Arthur ran the bandit though with his sword, Gwaine slid onto the ground in front of Merlin, whose hands were clutching at the dirt while he struggled to take in a breath. Wind whipped through the branches above their heads and Merlin’s eyes flashed gold.

"Love, what is it? Talk to me" Gwaine put his hands on his husband's shoulders and pulled him up and towards him. Merlin fell into his chest and Gwaine ran a hand along his back to see if he had been injured at all.

"Serkets" he whimpered into Gwaine's ear, gripping tightly to the front of his cape. Understanding dawned on his face and he quickly moved his hands from Merlin’s back to his shoulders to avoid making it any worse.

Merlin felt like his back was on fire. He kept his eyes on the trees around them. There was a nest, wasn’t there? They never hunted alone.

“Merlin?” Lancelot called, and Merlin panicked seeing the reflection of moonlight on their armor. The wind picked back up and all Merlin could hear was the serkets scurrying over roots and branches to get to him.

“Love, you’re safe.” Gwaine cupped Merin’s cheek and guided one of Merlin’s hands to his chest. Gwaine took a deep breath, then another. “They’re not here. I promise.” Merlin took a breath, and the wind slowed. His eyes focused on Gwaine’s. “There you are.” Gwaine smiled, and Merlin attempted one back, but it was watery at best. He still wasn’t completely calm, and though there were no serkets now, he still had a sting on his back stubbornly making itself known.

“Are you hurt?” Arthur asked. Merlin was surprised to see Arthur kneeling beside Gwaine, Lancelot standing just behind them with a hand on his sword, scanning the trees in case there were any more threats.

Merlin cleared his throat, “I’m fine.” He said softly. He moved to stand, but hissed when fire slithered across his lower back. Gwaine took one of his arms, and stood slowly. Arthur quickly took the other, and they had Merlin up.

“You don’t look it.” Arthur said, and he could have sworn that even in the sparse moonlight Merlin looked pale.

“It’s nothing new.” Merlin remarked, not meeting Arthur’s eye. “An old serket sting” He answered, looking into the trees.

“What?” Arthur asked, eyes wide. “I didn’t know.” Lance said sadly to Merlin. Merin just shook his head.

“You weren’t here, I didn’t tell you.” He whispered. Merlin tried to get a good look at everyone’s faces, and realized he couldn’t. He conjured a weak ball of light. Arthur could see now that Merlin was in fact pale, and Lancelot noticed him swaying slightly in spite of both Arthur and Gwaine holding him up. Gwaine seemed to just now notice this too, and gathered Merlin into his arms. Merlin groaned a little, but offered no protest otherwise, just resting his head on Gwaine’s shoulder and closing his eyes. They started walking at a quick pace towards their camp.

“Thank you.” Merlin was looking up at Gwaine earnestly, but Gwaine could see the exhaustion on Merlin’s face. Gwaine leaned down and pressed a kiss to Merlin’s cheek.

“For you, anything.” Gwaine confessed quietly. “You don’t even have to ask, Merlin.”

Merlin smiled softly, and craned his neck up to press a kiss to Gwaine’s jaw. “I love you.” He whispered beside his ear.

“I love you too, Merls.” The light glowed a little brighter.

Chapter Text

They made it back to camp to find an agitated looking Leon. He visibly relaxed when he saw them coming through the trees. That calm vanished in an instant when he saw Gwaine walking behind Arthur and Lancelot carrying Merlin. Leon, Elyan, and Percival stood quickly.

“What happened to Merlin?” Percival asked, rushing to get Merlin’s medical kit from his bag.

“He was stung by a bloody serket.” Arthur called out. Leon and Elyan unsheathed their swords, and Percival quickly stood with Merlin’s kit in hand, watching the shadows beyond their circle.

“Not recently, prat.” Merlin responded. His voice was stronger than before, and flooded with exasperation. “Next time, if it’s not too difficult for you, think before you shout alarming things to a camp of trained knights.” Arthur glared, but it softened when Gwaine set Merlin down on his bedroll and Merlin couldn’t hold back a low groan at the movement.

Percival crouched down and passed Merlin his bag. Merlin thanked him, and started searching for one of the pain relievers he had packed. He took it out and set the bag down.

“I thought you said there were two, love.” Gwaine said. Merlin sighed and opened his bag, pulling out a second bottle.

“Happy?” He said to Gwaine, and Gwaine raised an eyebrow, purposefully glancing toward both bottles. “You look like Gauis when you do that.” Merlin muttered, smirking. He quickly downed both bottles and Lancelot handed him a waterskin. Merlin drank some and then fiddled with the cap.

“So….Merlin.” Arthur started, and Merlin hummed, staring into the fire. Away from anyone’s eyes. “About that serket.” Merlin’s hands stilled and he sighed, closing his eyes.

“I don’t suppose there’s any way you’ll forget about it?” He faced Arthur now, smiling lopsidedly. Arthur narrowed his eyes. Merlin sighed again. “Guess not.” Merlin tipped his head back to Gwaine’s shoulder and looked up at the stars. It was quiet for a moment, just the cracking of the fire.

“It was back when Morgause had manipulated Morgana into working against Camelot.” Arthur stiffened, and the rest of the group looked uncomfortable. “Yeah that’s reason number one of why I hadn’t told you.” Merlin said grimly, looking around at his friends. “I didn’t want to remind everyone of my failure to help Morgana the first time.” Gwaine squeezed Merlin’s hand.

“That’s not true.” He said strongly. “You only ever did what you thought was right.” Merlin shook his head.

“I should have done better.” Merlin admitted to the stars. Merlin’s grim features looked out of place. The Round Table had always seen Merlin so bright, seeing him like this pained all of them.

“You did do better, Merlin.” Merlin’s breath hitched, and he slowly met Arthur’s gaze. Arthur was unwavering. “I mean it. You are the only reason Morgana was still with us when it counted Merin. You are the reason I have my sister back. I can never thank you enough.”

“But she still killed Uther.” Here Arthur looked into the fire. He licked his lips and started slowly.

“I loved my father, but he was not a good king, Merlin. I’ve known that for years.” Arthur’s eyes had a heavy sadness. “It took time, at first, to come to terms with this, but my people are truly better now than they ever were under his reign.” Arthur gestured at some of the people he loved most. “He would not have valued you, because of how you were born, because of what you can do.” He looked intentionally at Merlin as he said this. Then he scoffed, “He certainly never even valued me or Morgana.” Arthur’s jaw clenched. He shook his head.

“I welcomed the Druids, repealed the magic ban, married Guinevere, and I can openly love all of you because I am the King and not my father.” Arthur looked around the group and suddenly seemed nervous.

“Alright.” Arthur started again, “That’s enough of me talking about my feelings, I do believe it’s your turn to talk Mer-lin.” Arthur turned all the attention back on Merlin. Who huffed when he realized he hadn’t gotten out of anything. Merlin trailed his fingers across his cloak.

“It wasn’t long after Morgana came back from being missing. I found out that she was in league with Morgause and I followed her out into the forest one night.” Arthur wanted to stop him, ask him more about how he knew, but he didn’t want to interrupt. Merlin would talk about anything but himself, Arthur wouldn’t jeopardize this moment.

“I guess I wasn’t as stealthy as I thought I was.” Merlin let out a depreciating chuckle. He wouldn’t meet anybody’s eye. “Morgana called me out, and some men dragged me to Morgause. I couldn’t risk anyone knowing about my magic, back then, so I couldn’t do anything.” Merlin bunched the hem of his cloak into his fist, and Gwaine wrapped his arms around Merin’s shoulders. He relaxed some, and smoothed the cloak back over his legs.

“Morgana returned to Camelot without me. Morgause, she um..” Merlin stopped, and cleared his throat. Gwaine handed him the water again, and Merlin took it in his hands.

“You don’t have to tell us, Merlin.” Lancelot offered. Merlin shook his head.

“I do want to.” Merlin looked at all his friends. “I just haven’t had to tell this one in a while. After earlier…” Merlin started, but took a drink of the water.

“Morgause put me in magical chains, and left me in the middle of a serkets’ nest. Honestly, that seemed like overkill, the serkets were plenty enough without that fun little problem.” Merlin bit out. The fire flared suddenly, and even though they could see gold flash through Merlin’s eyes, no one said anything. Merlin took a deep breath, and continued. “She didn’t even know about my magic, I was just a meddlesome servant to her.” Merlin shook his head and sighed. “I held off as long as I could, before I realized I could call Kilgharrah for help. While I was calling him, one of the serkets got me. Kilgharrah got me out, and took me to a cave to heal me.”

“If the dragon,” Leon started haltingly, he knew Merlin was a dragonlord and was fond of Aithusa, but he was still wary of the Great Dragon who he vividly remembered trying to burn Camelot to the ground, “If the dragon healed you, then why are you still hurting?”

“Serket stings have a very powerful venom, even magic can only do so much for it.” Merlin explained. “The scar on my back flares up from time to time. And unfortunately serket venom causes permanent damage to the affected area, so the symptoms will never completely fade” Merlin said grimly. “It’s just something else to deal with now, I’m afraid.” Merlin frowned.

“Thank you for telling us.” Percival spoke up. Elyan nodded in agreement. Then noticed how Merlin was practically laying on top of Gwaine. “Why don’t you get some rest, Merlin.” Elyan said gently. Merlin was reminded very suddenly of Gwen, and how alike they were, with concern shining through Elyan’s eyes. Merlin smiled, and snuggled further into Gwaine’s arms. Gwaine chuckled, and kissed Merlin’s temple. Merlin hummed, but looked to Arthur. He tilted his head, but he was so tired now that it looked more like he just flopped it over.

“I’m sorry you had to carry this without the rest of our support, Merlin.” Arthur walked over and crouched in front of Merlin, he put a hand on his shoulder. “I meant it all those times I said I could never thank you enough.” Merlin smiled softly. Arthur returned to his own bedroll and heard Merlin from across the fire.

“I never set up the wards.” Merlin pouted, and tried to sit back up from where he was laying on Gwaine’s lap. Gwaine set a hand on his chest and ran his fingers through Merlin’s hair, Merlin stilled and looked up at Gwaine.

“I’ll take the first watch.” Gwaine announced to the group. But Arthur was already shaking his head.

“No, you just watch over him, Gwaine.” Arthur said solemnly. Gwaine nodded at Arthur.

“I’ll be on first watch.” Lancelot volunteered. The rest of the night was set, and Merlin fell asleep to the sounds of the rest of the Round Table settling in, and to Gwaine’s hand carding through his hair.
===

Merlin woke just after sunrise, watching the sunlight filter through the forest for a moment. Gwaine was still asleep at his back, his arms wrapped around Merlin’s waist. Merlin slowly sat up so he didn’t wake Gwaine, and made sure to place the blanket back around him. Merlin greeted Leon, who had the last watch, and started making breakfast. Soon enough all the knights had risen except Arthur. Merlin grinned brightly at the Round Table, who were all varying levels of amused as Merlin walked over to the sleeping King.

At first, Merlin nudged his legs with the toe of his boots. “King Prat, you’re late.”

“Go away.” Arthur grumbled and rolled over. Some of the Knights chuckled quietly and Arthur glared at them. Merlin's next move was a bit more drastic, he reached down and plucked Arthur’s blanket off him.

“Up and at em, lazy daisy!” Merlin called cheerfully. Arthur sat up quickly, making a grab at the blanket, but Merlin just laughed.

He heard laughter ring through the clearing, felt the cool breeze move through the forest, and he knew that today was going to be a good day.