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Chapter Text

At the ripe age of 13, Ambrosious knows for sure that he has a crush on the newest of his fellow cadets. A big one, too. It's been a full year since that scrawny commoner boy broke into the Institute on their first day of training and ripped apart Todd's training dummy on screen. He didn't know it at the time, but Ambrosious fell head over heels for the determined boy. 

The day after, he found out the boy's name was Ballister Boldheart, and he would be joining the Institute, training alongside Ambrosious. And their classmates but that's less important.

One week into their second year, and the same day that Ballister broke in and stole his heart, Ambrosious has finally worked up the courage to talk to him and act on his crush.

(He can't count how many times he had ran into Ballister last year, panicked, and promptly fled.)

(Yes he can, it was 17 times.)

He knows next to nothing about romance. His parents usually go out to dinner dates, but Ambrosious doesn't think him and Ballister are nearly close enough to be going anywhere together. So, with a week of research, or watching a bunch of cheesy romance movies and love songs, Ambrosious has finally decided that flowers are one of the easiest and best ways to flirt.

Immediately after lunch, the cadets have an hour of free time that they get to themselves. Ambrosious breaks away from his fellow cadets instantly, peeking around the corner to see Ballister moving towards the training grounds. He's noticed that he always goes either there or to the library during his free hour.

Knowing where he'll be able to find Ballister, Ambrosious sets off on his search. He practically sprints to the Institute's gardens, scanning each cluster of flowers he passes for one he thinks would be good enough for his amazing classmate. He doesn't recognize very many of them, but he knows specifically to ignore the roses. Not that they wouldn't be good flowers, but they haven't bloomed yet and would die quickly.

His eyes set on a single flower against a bush of large, bright pink ones. He crouches, inspecting it closer and smiling victoriously when he feels content with his find. It's a deep blue and purple flower, one of the ones that are mostly an organized cluster of petals, and it has speckles of white over the flower. Each individual petal has a thin line of gold on the outer edge, and Ambrosious allows himself to feel proud of his finding as he gently plucks the flower close to the ground. He stands up, gently grasping the flower's stem in both hands, and starts the run back to the training grounds.

Even down the hallway, he can hear Ballister training. Slowing to a walk, he sneaks around the doorway to spot Ballister on the far edge, near the training dummies lined along the wall. He's managed to drag one out further into the yard, and is wielding one of the larger, weighted swords meant for cadets at least 2 years ahead of them. The sword is longer than Ballister's torso, but he continues to expertly swing it with both hands on the handle. Ambrosious stops and watches for a minute, admiring how fluent the boy's movements are. Only after he's knocked the dummy down with an aggressive jab with the hilt and pauses does Ambrosious take a deep breath and step out around the banisters. Ballister whirls around at the first crunch of his footsteps on the dirt.

Ambrosious almost wants to flee again under that intense and suspicious gaze, hidden by a curtain of dark hair. Ballister is only a few months younger than Ambrosious himself, but he's still significantly shorter and thinner. Despite his shorter stature, the one wide, brown eye that has pinned the golden boy to his place is threatening, daring him to step closer.

Ambrosious forces his legs to move closer.

"Um. Hi. Ballister? I-I'm Ambrosious, um, sorry for. Intruding? Interrupting your- your training. You're really good by the way, I haven't seen someone be able to swing those swords without falling yet but- sorry, sorry I'm getting sidetracked, um, I found this flower for you and- and I was wondering if-"

"Put that down."

Ambrosious' confidence and heart drops through the ground at the harsh tone, and he draws the offered flower closer to himself.

"Right, right, sorry, um, we barely even know each other, of course you wouldn't-"

"Put that down. Don't you know what you're holding?"

His stumbling stops, a bit stunned by the new urgency in that sharp eye and accented voice.

"What?"

"That's nightroot, dummy, put it down!"

"What- what does nightroot do?!"

"It's poisonous!! Drop the flower!!"

Ambrosious panics at that and flings his hands out to the side, flower dropping to the ground in between them. Now that the nervousness has vanished, he can feel his hands beginning to itch violently. He quickly brings his right hand to his left and starts scratching trying to remove the feeling.

"No, don't scratch it, you'll make it worse! Here- stop scratching, let me see it!"

Small, dark hands grab his wrists to pull his hands apart, then slide up to cup the backs of his own hands. He jerks his head up to see Ballister staring down at the burns intently, calculating.

"Jeez, how long were you holding that? We need to get you to the nurse, you need cream for that."

Before Ambrosious can answer, Ballister grips his elbow and begins leading him through the winding hallways of the Institute. His heart jumps a bit realizing that Ballister looks like his own knight, pulling him towards safety. Ambrosious himself is just in his uniform, bag left in his next class. Ballister, though, is donning the training armor required when using any weapon on the training grounds. The too-big sword is sheathed on his hip, barely missing skimming the ground as they walk. He can hear Ballister muttering under his breath about nightroot and how to treat it, repeating it like he's trying to ingrain it into both their heads. In a daze, Ambrosious doesn't even realize they've gotten to the nurse until Ballister releases his arm.

He turns sharply to look at him, relaxing when he just goes to sit in a chair next to the door. He's moved the sword to lean on the wall next to him, and Ambrosious meets his concerned gaze before his attention is pulled away by the nurse.

"Where on Earth did you manage to find nightroot? Gloreth, your poor hands are so red. Tell me if this hurts, alright?"

He winces as she takes a swab and rubs a treatment cream over his palms.

"This should have it heal mostly overnight, but take it easy today. No holding heavy objects and try to keep your hands to yourself."

"Thank you, ma'am, I'll make sure to be careful."

She nods and has him answer a few more questions before giving him a note so he can avoid training later today. Gently pocketing the note, he notices that Ballister isn't in the chair anymore. Dejected, he exists the nurse's office with his head down.

"You alright?"

Ambrosious isn't quite able to stop the startled shriek from escaping, jumping back and tripping over his own feet. A small, slightly familiar hand, grabs his wrist and saves him from his fall. He stares up stunned at Ballister, watching him with the same concerned and focused eye as before. Slowly, he pulls Ambrosious back into standing, looking up at him as he lets go of his wrist.

"Uh."

"You okay? Didn't pick up any other poisonous plants and mess with your head, right?"

"Oh- no, no, I'm okay. Just irritated my hands, can't pick up a sword today for training."

"Oh, that sucks."

"A bit, yeah."

"You wanna walk to class? We have the same one next, don't we?"

"Oh, sure! Yeah, I think we do."

"Good. And I can make sure you don't pick up any other possibly dangerous plants or objects on the way."

"Wh- hey!"

Ballister laughs, and oh wow Ambrosious is going to try his hardest to make him laugh again. It's as lovely as his voice is.

"Fine. I suppose you can guard me from my own dumbness."

"You'll need it."

Ballister holds his right hand out, then falters and blushes slightly.

"Um. I'm Ballister."

"I know. I'm Ambrosious."

Ballister smiles up at him.

"I know."

"Sorry about. Trying to give you a poisonous flower."

Ballister shrugs, left hand planting on the hilt of the sword on his hip.

"It's not the worst that's happened. Honestly kind of sweet. Do... Do you want to be friends?"

Ambrosious smiles widely, glee filling him. It might not be exactly what he wanted, but he'll happily take Ballister as a friend nonetheless.

Chapter Text

Befriending Ballister and learning more about him has only cemented Ambrosious' crush. He's smart and strong and surprisingly sassy when he lets his guard down. He also learned that he only relaxes around people he fully trusts, something Ambrosious is unreasonably proud of earning. They spent their entire second year at each other's sides, laughing and training, only breaking apart for summer break. 

He's been taking note of things Ballister likes and dislikes during the year, and spent his summer nights writing down a clear list in his journal. Which leads him to currently, where it's about 1 am, and Ambrosious is sitting up on his bed in his Institute bedroom with a flashlight and pen. He's determined to figure out something more personal to give to Ballister, especially after the flower incident from last year. He taps the pen against his chin as he rereads his list, rubbing his eyes to clear the sleepy blur from them. He sighs, and begins to worry his lip as he gets stuck picking between 3 items: a specially designed sword (which would take longer than he'd like to make), a batch of homemade tarts (he learned Ballister adored them from sharing his lunch once), or a tool kit (Ballister had repaired the training system once after a malfunction, which led to him admitting his love for science and creating).

He's interrupted from his brood- thinking, by a loud rumble from outside and a flash of light through his curtains. He blinks, only now hearing the rattle of rain against his window and wall. Huh. It's been a while since there's been a proper storm over the City. Of course there's light rains periodically but there hasn't been lightning since before Ambrosious joined the training program. He looks at the clock and grumbles to himself before tucking his pen into the center of the page and closing his journal. Regretfully, he decides he'll make his choice in the morning, when he isn't groggy and distracted. He slides out of his bed and hides his journal between two thick books on his shelf. 

He goes through the motions of getting ready for bed, changing into pajamas and brushing his teeth, and is just about to climb back into bed when there's a triple knock on his door. He stops, turns, and stares at it for a moment. No one else should be up at this hour, and the silence goes on long enough that he starts to think he imagined it. Or, maybe it's just starting to hail with the storm-

There's only time for one knock before another crack of lightning lights up his room and the knocking turns into rapid pounding. He jumps up from where he was kneeling on the bed and rushes to the door. He grabs one of his swords on the way, bracing for the possibility of a threat before flinging the door open. His eyes barely start adjusting to the darkness of the hallway before there's a fist gripping his shoulder and a body knocking the air out of him. He moves on instinct, bringing a hand up to grab at the hair of his attacker and sliding the pommel and his other hand in between their bodies to push them away. 

His brain catches up a split second before he shoves them to the ground, recognizing the design of the shirt pressed against him, and now seeing the dark hair gripped in his right hand. He drops the sword and releases his grip, instead bringing his arms around his friend.

"B-Ballister? Hey- hey, what's wrong?"

Ballister is shaking like a leaf, clinging to Ambrosious like he'll collapse if he lets go. The other doesn't say anything, just grabs uselessly at the fabric of Ambrosious' shirt and shakes his head. The room lights up and is immediately followed by the window shaking from the thunder. Ballister jumps and suddenly drops to the floor, Ambrosious following him.

"Hey- hey, look at me- please? Can you please look at me? Hey, there we are..."

Ballister lifts his head as asked, one clear eye meeting Ambrosious with a look of pure terror that the boy has never seen on his friend before. Even when he had first joined the Institute, been on TV with the Queen herself, faced Todd and his posse of jerks, Ballister has never looked afraid. 

"Hey, what's wrong, what happened?"

Ballister squeezes his shoulders, shaking his head again and letting his messy hair fall further in front of his face. When thunder rumbles again, causing Ballister to tuck his head underneath Ambrosious', the connection finally clicks.

"Is- is it the storm? Are you scared of the storm?"

Ballister whines and curls in on himself, pulling away a bit as if ashamed.

"Hey, no, that's alright! Everyone has fears, okay? I'm not gonna tell anyone. Here, let's- let's get on the bed, you can stay with me tonight, okay?"

He hears Ballister sniffle, still hiding his face. But over the wind and rain pouring outside, he hears the whispered response of a simple:

"Okay..."

Gently, he moves Ballister's hands from his shoulders to his own, squeezing reassuringly before helping him stand. He wraps his arm around his friend's shoulders and guides him through the dark room to his bed.

"Here, it's kinda tall, just one foot up at a time- there you go! Good job, you got it!"

He makes sure Ballister is safely in the middle of his bed before returning to the doorway to pick up his sword and close the door. He hangs his sword up, quickly moving back to the bed at another rumble of thunder. Ambrosious climbs back up and scoots to sit next to Ballister against the headboard.

"Are you alright? You're- you're not hurt, right?"

Ballister shakes his head, curling further into Ambrosious and hiding his face again. Ambrosious brings a hand up to cup the back of the boy's next and nearly shivers with him from how violently he's shaking. He holds him close for several minutes, feeling him get worse and worse as the storm and thunder continue. When Ambrosious feels a drop of something cold and wet against his neck, he finally comes to a decision.

"Hey Bal? Could you let go for a minute? Just a minute, I promise, I just want to get something to help, okay?"

It takes a bit more reassurances that he'll be right back and replacing himself with a pillow for him to be able to slide off the bed again. He rushes to his closet, pulling the door open and digging through a bin of clothes and blankets. Finally, he finds the one he's looking for, grunting as he drags it out from underneath the rest, and doesn't bother closing the closet before he pulls it back over to Ballister. He gently replaces the pillow with himself again, pulling Ballister close and wrapping the weighted blanket around both of them.

"There. See? I'm right here, and I brought this. It should help, I think. And- and even if it doesn't, I'm here. I'll keep you safe, okay?"

He can hear Ballister crying quietly against him, still shivering. He pulls the blanket up over his head and manages to give one edge of the blanket to Ballister, trying to let him feel some sense of control.

"...you promise?"

Ambrosious almost doesn't hear him, but he hums and buries a hand in Ballister's hair to pull him closer as he whispers back to him.

"I promise, Bal. I'll keep you safe."

Ambrosious grumbles at the sound of his alarm, pulling his pillow closer to him as he shifts against the headboard. The blanket falls from his head and pools around his shoulders as he slowly blinks the sleep from his mind. He hears a groan underneath his chin and it takes him a moment to remember the night before. Right. The storm, Ballister, and the both of them falling asleep curled against the top of Ambrosious' bed.

"Hey... Bal... It's morning."

Ballister groans again, hiding his face further into Ambrosious before hesitantly pulling back to blink awake as well. Ambrosious watches as he rubs his eyes and yawns, brushing his long hair away from his face for a second.

"...thank you."

Ambrosious smiles and gives Ballister a squeeze, letting go with a small laugh when he gets a hand pushing against his shoulder for release.

"Of course, Bal. Anytime, you know you can come to me with stuff like this."

Ballister nods slightly, finally scooting away so they can both get up and ready for class. A thought strikes Ambrosious, one that makes him feel uncomfortably worried.

"Storms have really been getting worse this year, haven't they?"

Ballister just hums, picking up the weighted blanket they were using to fold it. Ambrosious takes the spot next to him to make his bed. He fidgets and bites at his lip, thinking of the increase in rain storms over the last month alone. He looks over at his friend again, stepping closer to help fold the blanket.

"Did it at least help? The blanket?"

Ballister stops for a moment, then nods.

"It felt... It felt safe. Like a wall between us and the storm."

The smaller folds the blanket into a neat square, holding it out to Ambrosious to take. Ambrosious puts his hand on it, thinks for a second, and nudges it back towards Ballister. He looks up in confusion, tilting his head slightly.

"Keep it. In case you can't get to me when you need to feel safe, alright?"

Ballister stops and his eye widens with shock.

"You- you don't have to- are you sure?"

Ambrosious smiles and nods, grunting when he's suddenly yanked into a hug. He grins and squeezes back, relieved to hold his friend without him shaking again.

"Thank you, Ambrosious. You're the best friend I could ever have."

Ambrosious glances at the journal still hidden on his bookshelf, and hums quietly as Ballister pulls away to return to his own room so they can start their morning routines. 

Oh well. He can always try again next time.

Chapter Text

Another year passes, both Ballister and Ambrosious are now in their fourth year of training, and Ambrosious has used up the three ideas he had. Ballister had managed to get the recipe for the tarts out of Ambrosious' mother. How, he still has no clue. Ambrosious gave him the other two on holidays throughout the year, a new tool kit and solder kit for Christmas, and the specialized sword for Ballister's birthday.

(Ballister had cried when he unwrapped the sword, and spent the rest of the week thanking Ambrosious even though he's told him he doesn't want anything in return for it.)

So, Ambrosious has run out of personalized ideas, and had returned to searching online for dating tips and ways to ask out his best friend. He still doesn't want to risk picking up the wrong type of flowers, or take forever trying to come up with another special gift and losing his chance. With all this in mind, Ambrosious goes for something a bit less dangerous and drawling, and decides to simply ask him out to dinner. Putting his journal in his desk drawer, he stands up with a sense of finality. 

He strides out of his bedroom, determination in his step as he walks through the blinding hallways of the Institute and outside. From the steps, he can already see Ballister on the long track created for sprint-racing. Ever since his growth spurt, Ballister has been coming to the tracks three times a week to try to increase his speed and endurance. Ambrosious still finds it incredible that Ballister continues to push himself beyond expectations, especially because he's already passed every one of their classmates.

He practically runs down the long path to the track, skidding to a stop by the fence and attempting to look casual as he leans on it.

Key word: attempting.

Ambrosious is breathing heavy and keeps shifting his weight, adjusting his hand from one position to another, eventually landing on propping his head up on it and his other hand on his hip as Ballister races across the painted line. He looks up at the automated billboard displaying his finish time, then grins and looks over at Ambrosious. Damn, he's beat his own record again.

Damn, his running clothes fit him nicely.

"Hey! You alright? You look flushed."

Ambrosious jolts up, then quickly tries to regain what little sense of casual he had by leaning back on the fence and crossing an ankle over the back of his leg-

"Hi, hey, how are y-"

-only for his arm to completely miss the fence and his face to meet the concrete.

"Oh Gloreth, are you okay?!"

Ambrosious blinks, flushing from embarrassment as Ballister helps him back onto his feet. He stands still as Ballister checks him over for any scrapes he might have given himself. Only when he pats over his nose does he relax again.

"You didn't break your nose, thankfully, but it might be bruised. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm okay. I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You're sweating."

"Oh it's- it's just really warm out."

Ballister stares at him for a second.

"It's 53 degrees out. Are you completely sure you're okay? You aren't getting a fever, are you? Hold still."

"No- Bal- Bal, I'm fine! I don't have a fever, I'm alright."

"Okay... If I find out you lied to me I'm hiding your lotions."

Ambrosious gasps, bringing a hand to his chest in mock offense.

"And mess up my skin routine! Oh you're evil, sir!"

They glare at each other for a few seconds before Ballister breaks and tries to hold back a giggle, leading Ambrosious to break as well, and soon both are laughing. Ambrosious wraps his arm around Bal's shoulders when he leans against him, and they slowly calm down in each other's arms. Ballister sighs out heavily and wipes his eyes as their bought of giggles ends.

"Okay, okay, phew. Okay. Obviously you're fine, you'd be on the floor otherwise. Anyway, did you want to tell me something?"

Ambrosious immediately goes stiff and red again, opening and closing his mouth and his brain runs double time for something to say.

"How- how did you know?"

"Oh please, I know when you have something on your mind. You literally tripped over yourself trying to talk to me just now."

Ambrosious feels his face burn in embarrassment again.

"So?"

"Uh. Right."

Deep breath. He could do this. All he had to do was ask Bal to dinner, outside of the Institute.

"I-I was. I just wanted. Um. I-I found this, uh, this-this place. And I wanted- well I was wondering if you-"

Oh good Gloreth he can't even get a sentence out. It is not helping that Ballister is staring at him with his big confused eyes. Ambrosious clears his throat, breathes in, straightens his back, and blurts it out a bit louder than he meant to.

"I found a new restaurant place a little bit outside of the Institute and was wondering if you wanted to go check it out with me?"

Nailed it.

"Oh."

Shit.

No wait, Ballister doesn't look disgusted or offended, he looks. He looks amused.

"That's what this is all about? Of course I'll go with you."

Ambrosious nearly collapses in relief. He heaves out a huge sigh and smiles at Ballister.

"Sorry. Sorry, I've just- I've never asked you to anything outside of the Institute. Wasn't sure if you'd be up for it at all, and I know you don't go to the City very much during the school year, but I don't know where you go during the summer so maybe you're just getting sick of the City because you live in it during summer but I don't even know if you do-"

He can feel himself getting more and more red again as he continues to talk, and could hug Ballister when he grips Ambrosious' shoulders and stops his ranting.

"Hey, calm down. It's alright, yeah? You can show me this new place you've found and we can deem it worthy or not of being one of our hang-out spots."

"Yeah. Yeah! Um- now? Or- or we can like pick a day for it, of course, if you're not hungry."

"I could eat. We usually head to the cafeteria by now anyway."

Ambrosious smiles and nods at him, hesitating for a second before deciding to act like a gentleman. He does what he's seen his father do for his mother and holds his arm out at an angle. Ballister laughs softly and hooks a hand into the crook of Ambrosious' elbow, sending a jolt of excitement and victory up his spine.

"Wow, such knightly behavior. Are you going to hold the door open, too?"

"Do you want me to?"

Ballister laughs, reaching back and pulling his hair tie out, slipping it onto his wrist for later as they walk out of the Institute's walls.

"Maybe in return, I'll show you where I go for the summer afterwards."

"You'd trust me with that?"

"Of course, Ambrosious. I'd trust you with my life."

They stop by Ballister's room so he can change into more casual clothes, and comes out in a tan tunic and jeans, a black cloak thrown over his shoulders. There's an undeniable glee making Ambrosious nearly skip the entire way to the Antlered Serpent, even when they hail a taxi to take them there, his leg keeps bouncing with joy. They take a booth near the back, sitting opposite of each other.

Skimming through the menu, they agree to split a basket of nachos instead of getting separate meals. They could always get more if they were still hungry afterwards. After ordering their food and drinks, it's as easy as breathing for them to start talking about this and that, laughing and having fun. Eventually, he spots Ballister looking around the restaurant more intently before nodding.

"I like this place, it's cozy."

Ambrosious preens at knowing he found somewhere Ballister likes without the restraints of the Institute's influence.

"Well, now we just need to see if the food holds up. Then we can write it down as a go-no-go spot."

Bal nods, and after a few more minutes, their nachos arrive. They barely break conversation aside from thanking their waiter, setting the basket between them and munching away. Ambrosious is beginning to feel more and more confident as the time passes, working himself up to finally ask Ballister to date him.

Of course, then it all goes wrong so fast.

In the middle of telling Bal about how he had kicked Todd's ass in training the other day, his throat and mouth begin to itch. He takes a drink of his water, trying to get rid of the feeling but suddenly finds that he can't swallow. Or breathe, actually. Ballister is by his side the moment he starts trying to cough, patting his back and supporting him by his arm. Ambrosious' ears are ringing, it feels like his throat is filled with cement, and his vision begins to spin. He can't hear what Ballister is saying, but knows he's screaming at him from where he's standing above him.

Huh. When did he lay down? He doesn't remember getting out of his seat, and Ballister is beginning to look more and more afraid as his vision starts to dot.

Oh.

This is bad.

The world goes black and all Ambrosious can think about is how this will definitely ruin the chance of this being a hang-out spot.

Everything is blinding and smells too strong when Ambrosious wakes up again. He groans, recognizing the plastic-like fabric of the infirmary gowns and beds. Good Gloreth, what happened? The last thing he can remember is him and Ballister in-

He throws himself vertical, regretting it immediately as his head spins. A pair of familiar hands gently push him back against the bed as he blinks back into the real world. Ballister stands over him, with those big sad eyes that make Ambrosious feel like he committed the worst evil he ever could.

"Bal? Wh't h'ppened? Why 'm I in th' 'nfirm'ry?"

"You went into anaphylactic shock. The doctors ran some tests and apperantly you have a very severe allergy."

"Oh. Ta what?"

"Olives."

Ambrosious stares at him.

"Olives."

"Mhm."

"That's stupid."

"A little. I didn't even know people could be allergic to olives."

"We're not going back there, are we?"

Ballister huffed a laugh at Ambrosious' dejected tone, shaking his head.

"Honestly, I'd be surprised if we're let back in. You scared our poor waiter so badly, I was afraid she would pass out too."

Ambrosious winces in embarrassment, bringing his shoulders up a bit and tilting his head away.

"S'rry about that."

"Oh don't worry, I left her a huge tip for compensation. You are going to be on the cover of every news story for a week, though."

Ambrosious groans, dropping his head back against the pillow and bringing his hands up to cover his face. Ballister laughs and moves to sit on the bed with him.

"Doctors want to keep you here for another day, to make sure you won't keel over and die in bed. Also, I'm keeping an EpiPen with me from now on. I already know you'll forget yours."

The golden cadet blushes, sticking his tongue out at his friend before sighing with resignation.

"The nachos were good, though."

Ballister lets out a startled laugh, leaning back over Ambrosious legs and smiling down at him.

"We'll just have to remember to ask for no olives next time."

"Yeah. Next time."

Chapter Text

There is absolutely no way Ambrosious could screw it up this time. He's learned that he can't trust himself to get the whole confession out when just trying to talk to Ballister, so he spent the entire summer writing and reading and rewriting a love letter instead. His hand has cramped from gripping the pen so hard, and he's gone through 2 and a half notebooks trying to write the letter, finding something wrong about it, and ripping the page out to start over.

He finished the letter and neatly sealed it in an envelope, sticking a cheesy heart sticker on to seal it. (He'd originally planned to use his family seal, but it felt too formal for this situation.) The letter has been burning a hole into his pocket the entire week, making him fidget with his clothing any time he's around Ballister. He's been trying to work himself up to just give it to him, struggling to actually hand it to him at all.

Both Ballister and Ambrosious have gone through a huge growth spurt during summer, growing several inches to the point they're finally equal in height and mostly equal in build. Bal has always manages to be stronger than Ambrosious ever since their second year. He still won't tell Ambrosious what he does to attain the muscle over seemingly no time at all. Even with both changing and growing on their own time, Ambrosious is yet to curb his anxiety when it comes to flirting with Ballister.

And now that they're at the year and age where the cadets can request roommates, it's been even harder to keep himself from stumbling over his words every time he speaks. It was a given, and absolutely no surprise to anyone, that Ballister and Ambrosious had chosen to move into one room together. They'd blended their rooms together without any difficulty, decorating with posters and trinkets from both of their lives in an odd sort of harmony. It did give Ambrosious a little boost in confidence, strangely enough.

Of course, Ballister notices his odd behavior quickly, especially with the increased interaction that comes with sharing a room. He brings it up the second Monday in school, during their free period. They're sitting on a bench in the common grounds, catching up on their summers, when Ballister suddenly drops his own story to grab Ambrosious' wrist.

"You've been nervous since we got back to school. Did something happen?"

Ambrosious freezes, fingers still gripping the hem of his jacket before he takes a breath to steady himself.

"No, nothing happened. I just, um. I've been wanting to tell- or, ask you something, actually. I uh, I wrote it down. And- and, just, here. It's in this."

Ambrosious struggles to pull the envelope from his pants pocket for a moment, before holding it out to Ballister with stiff arms. Bal looks at him with confusion, slowly taking the envelope from him and setting it in his lap.

"Should I be nervous? You're sweating."

"No- no, I-I don't think you'll be nervous. Yeah. No, it's fine. Just. Just open it- um, please?"

Ballister searches his face for another few seconds before looking down at the letter. He smiles as he wedges his thumbnail under the sticker and gently peels it up. Ambrosious holds his breath, feeling like everything is moving in slow motion as he watches Ballister's hands with a learned focus. He almost feels like he's going into battle, his heart beats double-time, his palms are getting sweaty from where they're fisting his pants, and his throat feels tight with anticipation. 

Bal pulls the letter out of the envelope, setting it aside as he uses both hands to gently unfold the paper and-

And it's suddenly snatched out of his hands, slicing his skin open with the edges of the paper. Both jolt up into a defensive stance before either can process what happened. 

"Aww, passing letters now, Goldenloin? Why not share with the class!"

God fucking damn it.

Todd stands in front of them, waving the letter above his head mockingly. Ambrosious clenches his fists, knuckles turning white with rage as he glares daggers into Todd's stupid face. Bal talks right as Ambrosious opens his mouth to say some less-than-knightly things to Todd.

"Todd, just give it back. It's not for you."

"Oh, come on, street rat! Didn't you ever learn to share? Oh, or was that not something you learned from the trash you were raised in?"

Todd fucking Sureblade. Ambrosious is going to strangle him one day, he swears it on his life.

Others are starting to gather around them, and Todd grins in a way that tells Ambrosious he won't like what he does next. Todd raises the letter high above his head to display to their classmates before dramatically flicking it, bringing it down to hold in front of his face.

Oh shit.

"Let's see what's so secret, huh? Ballister-"

He doesn't get any further, because something inside Ambrosious had simply snapped, and an unbelievable rage had filled him the moment Todd had started reading the very personal and private letter. He'd moved forward faster than he knew he could, and had swung at Todd's face so hard he thinks he felt something crack under his fist. Todd falls to the ground, groaning as he covers his cheek. His skin is already starting to bloom purple when Ambrosious leans down to pick up the now dirty letter.

"Oh, now you've done it!"

Todd kicks him in the jaw, making him fall back on his ass and bring a hand up to cover his mouth. He has just enough time to brace as Todd tackles him into the dirt, and grab his wrist when he tries to swing for his nose. He can hear their classmates chanting as they start to kick up dust wrestling, trying to land hits and pin the other. Ambrosious thinks he can hear Ballister's concerned voice in the mix, but he's so blinded with rage that all he can focus on is beating Todd's ugly face black and blue. 

He manages to get Todd under him, using his knees to pin his legs and shoving his arm away with his left hand while he clocks him again with his right. He feels a dark satisfaction when he feels his cheekbone shift under his bloodied knuckles, and goes to swing again when he's suddenly grabbed by several pairs of armored hands. 

A group of guards hauls both him and Todd to their feet, restraining them as they hurl insults at each other and squirm to try and keep fighting. Adrenaline pounds through his veins as Todd is yanked down the hallway in front of him, towards the infirmary. The three guards holding Ambrosious wait a minute to put distance between them, and he slowly calms down as he's held in one spot. He can feel his jaw ache and blood run down from his forehead and lip. Looking around, he sees a few more guards keeping his fellow cadets at bay and away from where he and Todd had been fighting. 

The letter is in pieces in the dirt, unreadable and filthy. He stares at it for a minute before turning his gaze up again to scan for Ballister. He's at the edge of the crowd, leaning around one of the guards and staring at him with huge, concerned puppy eyes. Ambrosious' arms drop from where they'd been tense and ready in the guards' hold, exhaustion and a small bit of shame replacing the adrenaline and rage suddenly. He keeps eye contact with Bal for as long as he can, until he's pulled through the doorway and to the infirmary. 

He's put in a different room from Todd, staying quiet as the nurse treats his bloody face, hands, and bruised ribs. For the first time in a while, he neglects answering questions thrown at him with concern and annoyance. It isn't the first time he's been in a brawl with Todd, especially when it's over Ballister, but he's usually more cooperative with the nurses. 

Honestly, all he wants to do is curl up in his bed and sulk. He'd been building up his anxiety and excitement about having an actual chance at asking his friend out that now that it's gone, he just feels tired and defeated. He sighs deeply as he slinks down against the plastic pillow of the infirmary bed, bringing his hands up to cover his face. For a while, he just sits there like that, wishing he could get comfortable enough to pass out and forget the day.

"I thought we agreed that knights don't mope."

He jumps, not having heard Ballister enter, but takes his hands away from his face anyway.

"I wasn't moping."

"Sure you weren't. Because you're obviously thrilled to be back here. Again."

Ambrosious sighs again, looking up at his friend as he pulls a chair next to the bed, sitting down on it and leaning an elbow against the mattress.

"You didn't need to do that."

"You've said that before."

"Ambrosious, there's easier ways to stop Todd that doesn't end up with you being bruised for a week."

"But it feels so good to punch him. He deserves it, you know he does."

Ballister chuckles softly, reaching out and placing a hand over Ambrosious'. His heart jumps as he flips his hand over to squeeze Bal's in return. Really, there's no way that Ballister doesn't know by now, he's stopped trying to hide his affection after their third year!

"He really does, but you do it so often that the Director is going to start having a guard on you at all times. At least try to refrain?"

Ambrosious groans, shuddering at the thought. There's already cameras in every corner of the building, he'd hate to have someone following him around from dawn till dusk.

Someone that isn't Bal, at least.

Ballister reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a handful of dirty paper shreds. Ambrosious can't help but notice the band-aids covering his palms and fingers from where the paper had cut into his skin.

"I uh, I tried to save it but I can't... Read any of it. I'm sorry, Ambrosious."

"No, no, it's okay. It's not that important anyway, I can tell you another time."

"Are you sure? Okay... If you say so. Do you think you'll be allowed to leave today?"

"I sure hope so. I really, really hate that they try to keep me longer than anyone else."

"Well, they gotta make sure their Golden Boy is taken care of perfectly. Can't have a scratch on you or people would start a riot."

Ambrosious groans at the reminder of what happened after his unfortunate allergy discovery, which indeed ended up on every news station, accompanied with a picture of him being rushed out of the restaurant in a stretcher. No one talked about how Ballister was next to him the entire time, staying at his side even when he probably shouldn't have been. The City citizens had thrown together all sorts of stories about poisoning and attempted murder.

Ballister laughs and smiles at him, throwing the remains of the letter in the trash when Ambrosious denies the offered scraps. Ambrosious stares at the trash bin for a few moments as he feels an annoyance bubble inside of him.

He's really starting to get sick of saying next time.

Chapter Text

Ambrosious stares at the two tickets in his hand, rereading the label for them over and over. He'd bought them as soon as he realized this is the first year that the cadets would be allowed into the event. They've been deemed mature enough by the sixth year of knight training, and now his entire class has been given the right to attend. Of course, they have to buy their own ticket, as does everyone else except the Queen herself.

The Valentober Festival.

Singlehandedly the most romantic event in the Kingdom's history, and topped with the fact that this year is the 100th one, it's all anyone has been talking about for weeks. His parents have gone every year for as long as he could remember, always spending days preparing a new outfit each time. The entirety of the Kingdom is decorated with beautiful shining lights and colorful flags, patterned with hearts and ribbons and hung on every corner. Window screens are shifted to a red tint, which makes the streets glow a soft pink after the sun sets over the Wall and horizon. Everyone dresses with soft, flowy fabrics and gentle colors, warm or cool, and often match their respective partners and families.

The festival itself begins with a ball, which is where the tickets are necessary. Only those with a ticket are allowed inside the town square and castle at the time, and invited to spend the three hours sharing a dance with their partner. It's meant to be a sort of show, a display of love and pride about their relationship, a display for the whole kingdom to see. The castle is more of a private section, for those who are camera shy or wish to simply enjoy the event together.

A parade follows the end of the dance, offering the dancers a place inside of the parade instead of on the side. The knights are expected to join the parade, with or without a ticket, but ones that don't attend the ball are placed more professionally, trailing along the outer sides of the floats. Fireworks signify the end of the event once the parade has made a full circle around the City, back to the statue of Gloreth.

Everything will just be 50 times more dramatic from the 100th year celebration thrown into the mix as well. Ambrosious swallows dryly as he very carefully tucks the tickets away in his pocket. There is absolutely no way he can screw this up, this is the biggest chance he'll ever get. Thankfully, he knows Todd already has a date (somehow) so he won't be any issue during the festival. He pulls his phone out of his jacket pocket and sends a quick message to Bal.

'Hey. Meet me in the garden?'

'Sure? Is something wrong?'

'No, nothing wrong. I just have something to ask you.'

'You can't ask me now?'

'I want to do it in person.'

'Alright. See you in 20?'

'I'll be there.'

He sighs shakily, looking in the mirror and adjusting his hair for the 100th time in the last hour. He bites at his lip, tapping his knuckle with the opposite hand before taking a deep breath and puffing his chest out.

"You can do this. Just gotta ask Bal to the most romantic and serious event that will ever happen in your life. What could go wrong?"

He huffs at himself in the mirror before moving to his closet and swiping through his clothes until he finds the outfit he'd had pressed and hung up the day before they returned to the Institute. It was easy enough to hide it from Ballister, even though he's seen it several times before. He quickly changes into his pressed shirt and buttons up the silky, patterned vest over it. He pulls up the matching slacks and swaps out his boots for sleek dress shoes. He checks his hair in the mirror again and touches up the eyeliner he reapplied 6 times today, grumping when he still isn't content with his reflection. Looking around the room, he spots a vase of flowers his mother had sent with him when he moved back into the Institute. He quickly skips over, hand hovering over the different colored flowers before gently pulling a deep red out and slipping it into the chest pocket of his navy blue vest. He adjusts it for a minute before tapping at the petals to make it seem larger, moving back to the mirror to check his reflection yet again. 

Ambrosious grins when he feels happy with how he looks, moving over to the door to leave before abruptly rushing back to his bed to get the tickets out of his jacket pocket. Once those are in his pants pocket, he leaves his room and jogs down the hallways of the Institute. As he steps down the stairs to the garden, he starts to get second thoughts. Should he have brought something for Bal? Flowers, a card, chocolates? Or would that have made it worse? He almost forgot the tickets, and for all he knows with his past luck, he might have ended up poisoning one or both of them. He fidgets, tempted to pick the flowers lining the outside of the garden center into some sort of bouquet he could give Bal when he arrives. It's been a long time, is he okay? Oh Gloreth what if he isn't coming? What if he found out that Ambrosious was going to ask him and turned tail? 

Oh Gloreth, what if someone already asked him?

Ambrosious tugs his phone out of his pocket, quickly flipping open the conversation to ask Ballister if he was still coming-

His last message was 16 minutes ago. Bal was always spot on time, so he would be here in 4 minutes. If he came at all. No, he'd come, of course he would. Even if it was to turn Ambrosious down, he's not one to just ditch someone and run away from his problems. He'll show up, Ambrosious is sure of it.

It doesn't stop him from thinking and fidgeting with his hair and outfit for the next 4 minutes, pacing when he gets too anxious to stand in one spot. He catches himself picking at the golden trim of his vest and cuffs several times, and just caught himself doing so again when he finally hears the doors open and familiar footsteps move down the stairway towards him.

"Hey, is something up? You're usually not so dodgy."

Ballister steps around the fountain and both go still when he comes into view. He's in his work-out clothes, a pair of black sweatpants and a nearly silver long-sleeve shirt with a small dragon embroidered over his heart. He must have just come from the gym, despite it being nearly 8 pm, because he even still has his hair tied back, tied low and away from his face. Bal sweeps his gaze over Ambrosious before a nervous smile forms over his face.

"Those are your nice clothes."

"They are."

"Did I miss something? Was I supposed to dress up too?"

"No- no, it's fine, you look great how you are- and you-"

"Really? Because I'm covered in sweat-"

"-didn't even know I'd be dressed up anyway-"

"-and I'm still in these old clothes-"

"-so I wouldn't have expected you to think to change-"

"-so I feel really, really underdressed for whatever is happening."

They look at each other before Ambrosious grins and both begin to laugh. Bal steps closer, close enough that Ambrosious reaches out and lays a hand on his arm as they calm down relatively quickly.

"Okay, but, honestly, you look great Bal."

Ballister gives him a skeptical look.

"But, that's- that's not important, how you look right now doesn't change what I'm gonna ask you."

"Okay... Obviously something is important. You rarely wear your nice clothes, unless it's some family matter or a meeting with the Queen. You're not leaving, are you?"

"What- no! No, I'm- I'm not going anywhere Bal, I promise. Even if my family suddenly wanted me to not be a knight, I'm not leaving. We're in this together, remember?"

Ballister relaxes, smiling up at him and placing a hand on Ambrosious'- which he realizes is still holding onto Bal's arm. He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly and lowering his hand down Bal's arm and gently takes both of his hands in his.

"Okay. I've had this on my mind for- for a while, and I know that it's kind of sudden and I won't hold it against you if you say no, okay? You have a choice in this, I promise. I was just hoping that- well- okay, hang on."

Ballister is looking more nervous as Ambrosious gently releases one hand to start digging in his pocket, fumbling for a second before his fingers close around one of the tickets.

"Bal, you are... Incredible. You're amazing, and wonderful, and you mean so, so much to me. I can't imagine asking anyone else this, you're so unbelievably special to me and- I-I was hoping that- would you want to- hhh- okay."

He carefully lifts the ticket up for display between them, watching as Bal's eyes go round with shock and his mouth drop open.

"Bal, would you want to go to the Valentober Festival with me?"

He feels Ballister squeeze his hand, the one still holding his, and stares at the ticket for a long moment. Ambrosious can't tell if it's just the lighting or if Bal's face is growing more and more red.

Then he looks up at Ambrosious and his whole face twists with grief.

Oh fuck.

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck he's messed up everything. 

"Ambrosious-"

"You- you don't have to- we can just forget-"

"Ambrosious, I can't."

Bal looks on the verge of tears, voice breaking on the last word as his grip squeezes tighter. Ambrosious is completely thrown off balance, lowering the ticket and stumbling over questions.

"You- what? You can't? Why? Did- did someone else already uh- already ask you? Or- or I get if you just- if you're just busy- or, hell, you don't have to go at all, I get that, if you don't want to go with me or anyone or even by yourself, I get that, I promise, I'm sorry for pressuring you about this at all, I'll leave you alone I swear, I'll-"

There's a hand on his cheek, gentle yet shaking, and wiping away tears he hadn't realized started forming.

"Ambrosious, no, no it's not that at all. Of course I would go with you, I want to, I really, really want to, just... I-I can't afford to go..."

"You- right, studies and training and-"

"No, Ambrosious, I literally can't, I can't afford the ticket, they practically cost what I make in 2 years-"

Ballister looks like this is tearing him apart, grief and sadness and- longing?- filling his eyes, but an unbridled excitement reignites in Ambrosious. He drops Ballister's hand, stepping back to quickly shove his hand back into his pocket.

"Oh!! No! No, no, no, don't worry about that! No, look, wait- just gimme a second- oh shit-"

Both tickets slip out of his hand when he tries to rip his fist from his pocket, and he quickly flails to catch them before they hit the ground. He bounces back into standing, tickets gripped close to his chest before he fully extends his arms in show.

"Look! I-I already got two! I've had them for a few weeks, I just didn't know what was a good time to ask you, but it's in less than a month and we'd both have to start planning earlier on because everything will be backed up, but I guess we would get special privileges with clothing orders because we're knights in training and all that, and I-I'll pay for that too if you don't think you can afford a new outfit for it-"

He watches as Bal's face shifts again, going from grief, to surprise, to-

Oh. He doesn't know that look. It looks like hope, mixed with something he doesn't think he's ever seen before on Ballister. He quickly begins to backpedal, worried it might be something bad.

"Of- of course you can still say no or change your mind at any-"

A puff of air is forced out of him and makes him end his sentence when Ballister nearly tackles him in a hug. He takes a step back to support both their weight, gripping the tickets so he doesn't drop them. After a split second of confusion, he wraps his arms around his friend and squeezes as a silent question. Bal pulls back, and Ambrosious feels his legs wobble with relief and hope at the wide smile he's met with.

"Bal? Do you want to go with me?"

"Yes. Yeah! Yeah, absolutely, of course!"

Ambrosious grins, joy overtaking him as he wraps his arms around Bal's waist and lifts him off the ground. They both laugh as he spins them, joy bouncing between them and making Ambrosious feel like he could conquer the world for this man alone. He gently sets Ballister back on his feet, keeping his arms around his waist to steady him.

When they finally stop laughing, Ambrosious becomes aware of Bal's arms over his shoulders, and realizes just how close they are. He nearly melts when he sees that emotion again, full force. He still can't place what it is, but he knows he's seen it before, subtly. It's warm, and gentle, and makes him want to kiss Bal and hold him forever. 

With that thought, he glances down at Ballister's mouth, licking his lips and looking back up into his eyes.

"Bal..."

They jump apart when the doors suddenly open, a trio of guards stepping through to begin their rounds. Bal waves to them awkwardly, and then they look at each other once the guards have passed. Quietly, they start to giggle again as Ambrosious steps over to him and holds out one of the tickets.

"Guess that's our cue to get ready for lights out, huh?"

"Sadly. I need to shower first, then I'll see you in the dorm?"

Ambrosious smiles and nods, fighting the urge to offer his arm to Ballister after he takes the ticket. They walk back inside and go their separate ways. Ambrosious walks calmly to their room, nodding to any guards he passes and keeping a straight posture. He quietly enters their shared bedroom and closes the door behind him.

Only then does he allow the happiness in him to flow free, making him grin and hop around the room and punch the air in victory. He laughs as he fights the urge to jump on his bed and instead spins in a circle, throwing his arms up and letting out a shout of joy. He takes a minute to breathe and calm himself before quickly changing out of his nice clothes and into pajamas, replacing the flower back with the rest. He tucks the ticket away in his nightstand, then flops back onto his bed and spreads his arms out.

The extreme joy doesn't die down for the rest of the night, causing him to swing Bal around again when he enters their room 25 minutes later. Both spontaneously giggle and shimmy throughout their nightly routine, and Ambrosious lies awake long after the lights are off, basking in victory and joy.

They spend the next few weeks preparing for the festival. Ambrosious carts Ballister all over the City, to tailors and fabric shops and the seasonal shops only for this one event. He even manages to wrestle Bal into joining him for a spa day! He waits patiently when the both of them are getting measured, and they spend time between classes and in their room discussing how best to match without being identical. One night, Ballister shyly admits that this is the most thought he's ever put into an outfit. Ambrosious embarrassingly admits the same, taking first place above all of the parties his parents had dragged him to, and even above his own initiation ceremony.

They research designs and sketch up their matching outfits, similar in style and alternating between colors. Both agreed with a type of suit, coming up with a customized embroidery design for their vests, and a little symbol they had made for just the two of them on the chest pocket. After the main design is finished, one of the smaller, more meaningful details had made Ambrosious hesitate.

See, there's three items that symbolize three different types of love. There's bows, which are the symbol for familial love, showing how intricate and whole a family can be. The second is ribbons, often worn loosely, and symbolize platonic love. Ribbons are meant to show how platonic love can move freely, coming and going, and can reach anyone who reaches back. The final is flowers, meant for a romantic love. They're meant to symbolize the blooming of something new, delicate, and beautiful when cared for well. 

They had stumbled on this choice for a few days, mostly stuck between bows or ribbons.

On the fourth day, Ballister had carefully looked up at him and very quietly requested they use flowers.

Ambrosious couldn't stop his heart from hammering in his chest the rest of the night, the burning hope in his chest growing stronger and stronger. It only got worse when he found a box on his desk with a singular bracelet in it, an indent next to it where the matching one had resided recently. The only reason he's still restraining from asking him to date before the festival is because aside the preparations, absolute nothing has changed. Neither are actively attempting more shows of affection, and Ballister hasn't looked at him in that way since he asked him to the dance. He's almost afraid that he's misjudged the entire situation. But, Ambrosious is not known for backing down from a challenge, and rejected or not, he will ask Bal to be his boyfriend some time during the festival.

He keeps that determination up until the actual day of. It's mostly been replaced with anticipation and annoyance, because of a dumb tradition for anyone going in pairs. Similar to wedding rules (Ambrosious is storing that thought away to pine about later), the couple are meant to avoid seeing each other for the time period between morning and the beginning of the festival. They're meant to spend the time getting themselves to look their best for their partner, and even though the outfits are planned, Ambrosious and Ballister have not seen each other in the finished outfits. Ambrosious has had his carefully hung up in his closet since he got it a few days ago, still guarded within the deep red covering it was delivered in. Bal's was hung in his own closet, hidden within the same style of plastic covering.

Their morning had started out the same as always, albeit with a bit more excitement than usual. Ambrosious had woken up 30 minutes after Ballister, they started their morning routines, went to the cafeteria for breakfast, and then Ballister had said he needed to go into the City for a final appointment. Ambrosious had smiled at him, hugged him for a bit longer than usual, and had practically bounced on his toes as he told Bal he'll see him at the Square. Bal had smiled back at him, brushing a piece of hair away from his face, and vanished to retrieve his bag and suit from their room. Ambrosious hasn't seen him since, and it's starting to drive him insane. He hadn't realized just how tightly woven together his and Bal's lives were until he suddenly wasn't seeing him everywhere. 

He had forced himself to focus as he continued on with his day, making sure he had 3 hours to get himself ready for the ball, and allowing 30 minutes between his preparations and the beginning of the dance so he could arrive early. He keeps looking over his shoulder, attempting to ask Bal if he looked okay, and remembering that he won't see him for another couple hours.

It's practically torture, having to work through his day alone. Curiousity itches at his mind and anxiety twists his head, but he makes himself repeat his goal to himself. He will ask Ballister. He might combust if he doesn't.

Ambrosious stares in the mirror, pressing down his vest for the 16th time as he twists and turns to make sure nothing is out of place. He's still a little hesitant about the bold choice of design, knowing that he'll get more attention than he would like. His shirt in white and collared, cuffed at his wrists with a small red B on each cuff. The vest is a shining gold, reflecting the light in such a way that it looks covered in glitter. Deep blue embroidery twists up from the bottom, twisting and weaving over itself in vines and loops. There's small pictures hidden in the vines, small swords and roses that someone can only see when they know they're there. His pants have a similar design, twisting from the waistband down to the ankle on each side. The pocket on his vest has their symbol embroidered on in a warm red, lined with a light blue and settled over his heart.

He pulls the golden jacket over his shoulders, tugging it gently to remove any possible creases and settle it over his body. He double-checks that his ticket is in the pocket, crouches to slip on his black dress shoes and pat down his pants again. He moves towards his desk, carefully picking up the bracelet and slipping it on his right wrist. The band is a deep blue, matching his embroidery, and has a charm sewn into the top; a blue and purple flower with gold trim. Ambrosious laughs softly at the reference, tapping the charm a couple times before he very carefully tucks a lovely red flower into his chest pocket, shifting it's position a couple times before he feels satisfied. He moves back to the mirror, taking a deep breath and triple-checking himself. His eyeliner makes his eyes look more sharp than usual, and he has a blue eyeshadow brushed on over them. His hair is styled to the side, wavy and as shiny as he dared to make it. He looks himself dead in the eye.

"You will ask him. Don't back out on this again. Ask him to be your boyfriend. The worst he can say is no."

He nods to himself with a sense of finality, pushing himself back up and doing one final pat down and check. Ticket, check, wallet, check, EpiPen (because Ballister would kick his ass if he forgot it again), check. He has everything. Now, it's time to get to the event itself.

He can feel his legs shaking before he even reaches his front door.

Somehow, he manages to walk down to the road and hail a taxi to the city center, tipping the driver and moving towards the entrance. He's distantly aware of cameras already on him as he stands to the side of the entrance, scanning through those who have already arrived before turning to face the oncoming. He stands with his back straight, like a knight should, and fidgets gently with the cufflinks on his arms. He purposefully avoids looking at Todd as he walks past with a lady at his side.

He knows he's early, but he can't help but work himself up with nerves as he waits. As more and more couples arrive and enter towards the statue of Gloreth, and the crowds get more dense, Ambrosious almost wonders if Ballister suddenly had second thoughts. He begins to shift his weight from one foot to the other, ignoring the camera flashes and mixed looks he gets as the next few minutes pass on.

"Ambrosious!"

He whips his head around so fast he feels something twinge in his neck. Then he stops breathing, because, oh, there's Ballister, bounding towards him with a smile. He's wearing the designed suit, a deep blue that matches the embroidery on Ambrosious' own, and golden designs that twist upwards from the waist. On each wrist is a golden G pinned to the cuffs, a golden-banded bracelet on his right wrist matching the one he can feel pressing against his own pulse. The first major difference is that Ballister has a short train that's connected to the waistband of his pants, reaching halfway down his calves in the back. He's even gone as far as having someone put a golden eyeshadow on him.

And Ambrosious abruptly realizes what the appointment he went to was for.

"You cut your hair."

He can't help but stare. It's rare to see Ballister with his hair out of his face, but now it's simply gone. He's had it cut down and styled in a way that shows off his sharp jaw and wide, beautiful eyes. His hair is nearly as short as Ambrosious' own on the sides, and is kept long and combed backwards on the top, displaying his widow's peak. 

"You're..."

Ballister seems to falter, bringing a hand up to touch the side of his head.

"Is it bad? I-I didn't know if it would... Look okay, at all, I've never really cut my hair this short before..."

Ambrosious mentally shakes himself out of staring, reaching out to squeeze his hand.

"Bal, you look stunning."

Ballister flushes pink, eyes dodging to the side for a moment before he smiles shyly up at him.

"I could say the same for you. Maybe you should get your armor in gold."

Ambrosious laughs and suddenly all the tension drains from between them. Ambrosious stands straight again, puffing his chest out and offering an arm. He preens when Bal takes the offered arm and they move to join the crowd. They still stay towards the sides for now, talking happily as they wait for the music to begin. Idly, Ambrosious picks up a flower from one of the decorations to fidget with. He looks down, inspects the red petals for a few seconds, before getting an idea. He's still listening to Ballister talk about how overbearing the hairdressers had been when he looks up, and very carefully slips the stem of the flower behind Bal's ear. He goes quiet, blinking for a moment before meeting his eyes. There's a silent question there as he reaches up to touch the flower.

"I just thought you'd look nice with it."

Bal blushes, ducking his head and failing to hide his smile. 

Before long, the music begins and couples begin to distance from others to avoid collisions. Ambrosious does a dramatic gesture, sweeping his foot backwards in a semi-circle and bowing, leaning a hand outstretched for Ballister to take. He grins up at him when he laughs and takes his hand, letting Ambrosious take the lead.

"Just a warning, again, I've never really danced before."

"That's okay, I'll show you how."

"You don't want to go into the castle?"

Ambrosious places a hand on his waist, making sure to look him in the eye as he speaks.

"Ballister, I want the kingdom to see us. I'm not ashamed to be with you."

The man flushes almost as red as the flower in his hair, and- oh fuck there's that look again. It nearly makes Ambrosious melt and trip over himself before he collects himself and begins to dance. It is a little awkward at first, they trip over each other and a few toes get stepped on, but Ballister has always been a fast learner. Within minutes, they're moving smoothly with the music, smiling and spinning and feeling higher than the sky. 

Everything fades away as they dance, the noise of others and music becoming background noise as they hold each other close. Ambrosious swears that he can see the stars shining in Bal's eyes, feels like he's holding his entire world in his hands, safe and protected. They drift effortlessly over the ground and through the crowd, dancing through a mist of colors and affection. Time becomes a forgotten thing as they bask in their own realm. Bal's eyes dip lower for a second before coming back up to meet his own again. Slowly, they come to a stop, gazing at each other for what feels like forever. That one look that Ballister had before is blazing, drawing Ambrosious in unconsciously as Bal's hand gently squeezes his shoulder. He's so close, if he could just-

Someone bumps into his back, causing him to headbutt Ballister with an audible thunk. They break apart, hands coming up to cradle their respective skulls before Ambrosious glares at a woman who half-asses an apology before walking off into the crowd again. Once his head stops throbbing, he brings a hand up to gently touch Ballister's.

"Hey, sorry, are you okay? Are you bleeding, here, let me see."

Ballister moves his hand, allowing Ambrosious to see the wound. It looks slightly swollen, but he doesn't think they hit hard enough to bruise. He relaxes, reaching up and carefully fixing a few strands of hair that had fallen out of place.

"We'll be okay. Might be tender for a bit. You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, just a little headache now."

"Do- do you want to skip the parade?"

"Are you kidding? When's the next time we get to ride on a float?"

Ambrosious smiles, fixing the flower in Bal's hair again before gently taking his hand.

"Well then, shall we?"

Bal smiles and follows next to him, nearly pressed against his side. Ambrosious falters slightly when he realizes that he and Bal will be placed at the very top of the cadet's float, due to his status. He glances at Bal when they approach, worried about making him uncomfortable.

"You don't mind being front and center?"

"Ambrosious, this is far from the first time I've been in front of a camera. Now come on, Rose, before we have to deal with Todd and his friends!"

Ambrosious is still trying to reboot his brain from the sudden nickname when Bal drags him by the hand to their place. The platform rises once both are on, and he squeezes Bal's hand in reassurance when he sees the nerves in his face. His shoulders drop a bit more, and he smiles back at Ambrosious before the lights shine on their faces again. The platform stops and they're suddenly standing at the center of everything, all eyes turned on them. Ambrosious puffs his chest out again and smiles when people begin to cheer louder. Bal still seems a bit nervous, but is relaxing slowly as the parade begins to move. They keep their hands entwined as they wave towards others from their position. 

About 15 minutes into the parade, Ambrosious is so distracted with watching the crowds pass that he doesn't catch what has the public's attention when everyone suddenly screams with joy.

Not until a millisecond later, he feels Ballister rest his head on his shoulder, tucking himself closer and into his neck. His heart races double-time as he feels his face heat up and split into a dumb smile. He catches a screen up on one of the buildings and sees Bal smiling too. He nearly cries as emotions flood him, instead opting to rest his head on top of Bal's. He distantly hears the public scream again at the display, and barely has another thought that isn't about Ballister Boldheart for the rest of the hour long parade. Ballister doesn't leave his spot on his shoulder the entire time, only occasionally shifting to move closer until the float comes to a stop. 

They look up at the statue of Gloreth, following the blade of her sword until they lay eyes on the open sky. Ambrosious gently switches his right hand for his left, squeezing Bal's before wrapping his right arm around his waist and pulling him closer. They lower themselves into sitting, holding each other close as the fireworks begin, and the sky ignites with the sounds of love and pride and happiness echoing from below.

They both yawn as they step back into their dorm, lazily stripping their suit jackets and shoes. Both are hesitant to bother changing, but eventually work each other up into getting dressed in proper pajamas. Bal gets a cup of water to place the flower in as Ambrosious sets up his laptop to play a movie on his bed. He sits back against their collected pillows and raises his arm to beckon Bal over, tugging him closer when he finally crawls into the open space and against his side. Ambrosious begins the movie and allows himself to feel exhaustion mix with euphoria as they settle against each other.

20 minutes later, he remembers what began the whole adventure.

"Hey, Bal?..."

"Mm?..."

"Can I... Can I ask you something?..."

"Mm..."

Ambrosious has to fight off another yawn as he places his head on Bal's again.

"Would... Mm, would you be my boyfriend?..."

It takes him a moment to realize there wasn't a mumbled answer.

"Bal?..."

When he picks up soft snoring from the man pressed against him, he sighs quietly. He's too tired to be annoyed or upset at this. For now, he'll just embrace the pure joy of the whole experience as Ballister sleeps soundly next to him.

Sleep doesn't sound that bad, either.

Chapter Text

Nothing is going to go wrong this time, he made sure of it.

Ambrosious spent nearly 2 months preparing what's hopefully the last attempt to ask Ballister to be his boyfriend. He's about 93% sure that he'll say yes, now, because they'd been closer than ever since the festival. Bal's been more open to affection recently, even though they would hug and he accepted Ambrosious' touches constantly, it's somehow increased. He initiates hugs more often, and they spend more nights in the same bed than separately, and they even started holding hands!! Even in public!! Ambrosious still hasn't lived down how he had completely frozen on the spot and turned as red as a traffic light, the picture was all over the news pages.

He'd seen so much of that Look on Bal's face in the past year, and he still can't place it.

Unfortunately, because of the stronger connection, the summer without Bal felt even more lonely than normal. He still hasn't been shown where Bal goes, so he can't go and visit him to distract himself or just check on him. So instead, he planned. He spent the nights thinking of plans and ideas, scrapping them if he found a single flaw, unbelievably paranoid that something will go wrong again. After the past attempts, he thinks he has the right to be nervous about someone or something getting in the way. Finally, he had decided on a nice little picnic, up on their little balcony overlooking the City and Glorodome, far away and above anyone else. 

He'd gone out and bought a new blanket to lay out, checkered gold and black and made out of a soft fluffy fabric. He spent yesterday packing a woven basket with plates, silverware, napkins, and preparing different snacks that he knew they both liked, including the homemade tarts Bal still adores. He's just finished picking up the basket of nachos he had ordered (without olives) from their hangout place, tucking it away in the basket as he climbs the ladder to their balcony. 

He sets the basket down, pulling the blanket out from under his arm and carefully spreading it out over the metal. He knows there won't be many clouds tonight, he checked the weather, and it also gives a perfect view of the sunset if he times it right. He pins down the corners of the blanket with small lanterns, because even if the weather is on his side, it still gets windy up here. And knowing their luck, they'd knock over a candle and set everything on fire. He digs through the basket and double checks that he has everything else. Dinnerware, check, food, check, desserts, check, a few bottles of juice and soda in case either change their mind, and even a bottle of wine he smuggled from his parents kitchen. 

After checking again that everything is set up the way he likes, he nearly trips as he rushes down the ladder and steps back to the street. He weaves around people and ducks into a flower shop, quickly getting the shop keepers attention and giving her his name. He'd done research beforehand and pre-ordered a bouquet of red and blue flowers, decorated with golden paint, and matched with tall stems wrapped with small white bell shaped flowers. They're wrapped in white craft paper and tied with a deep red ribbon. He tips a generous amount and runs back into the City street with the flowers held close to his chest.

He knows where Bal is, texted him during the rush to be sure, and skids to a stop right outside the training grounds. He can hear the machines working, can hear as Ballister grunts and twists around them, the armor knocking against itself and sword blocking attacks he isn't fast enough to dodge. Ambrosious takes a deep breath, holds it, and let's it out, then fixes his hair again and straightens out his hoodie. Hiding the flowers behind his back, he steps through the doorway into the grounds, moving around to watch as Bal finishes his session.

Gloreth, he's so handsome. He kept his hair short and styled after the festival, taking to heart how Ambrosious keeps saying he loves seeing his whole face. In addition to that, he's grown a goatee over the summer, making his jaw look sharper and somehow dragging more attention to his beautiful eyes. He's tall and strong and quick, twisting in the heavy armor and expertly avoiding a chain that launches at him from one of the machines.

Ambrosious sighs dreamily, leaning against the railings with what he knows is a dumb smile spread across his face. Ballister is breathing heavily when the simulation ends, and he visibly perks up when he sees Ambrosious loitering. As he smiles and jogs over, Ambrosious pulls himself together, standing upright and mentally prepping himself.

"Hey, Rose! Is something up? You asked me four times if I was still here."

"Oh- uh- yeah, I-I actually have something to show you."

"Really? Is it why you're holding your arm behind your back?"

"Yeah. Yes, that's part of it, but uh- could you change out of your armor first?"

Bal raises an eyebrow before smiling again.

"Yeah, sure. Wait up for me?"

"I'll be right out here."

Bal gives him the Look again, then turns and walks into the locker room. The moment he's out of sight, Ambrosious let's himself be flustered and flapping his free hand as he tries to collect himself. He'll never be used to the nickname, or the Look he keeps getting more and more. He takes a deep breath, tugging at his hoodie string as he starts chewing on his lip.

'It's fine. It's fine! Nothing will go wrong this time, just you and him. You just need to ask him this time, before you both get tired and pass out. The worst he can say is no, right? Right. Damn it Goldenloin, get it together!'

He looks up at Ballister coming back out, wearing a dark grey tunic and black jeans, a black jacket tossed on over it to keep the cold away. He steps up to meet Bal in the middle, still fidgeting.

"So. You alright? You're nervous-"

"These are for you!"

Bal takes a step back and blinks in shock as Ambrosious holds the flowers out suddenly, arms stiff and straight out. He curses himself for nearly pelting him with them, and for his not so subtle exclamation. But then Bal's eyes soften to the Look again, squinting as he smiles and reaches up to gently take the bouquet.

"Oh, Rose... They're beautiful..."

"Yeah... Y-Yeah, uh, I got them for you. But! But that's- that's not the surprise. Well- not all of it. Uh, here, follow me?"

He holds his hand out, hope sparking brighter in him when Bal shifts the flowers to one arm and takes his hand without hesitation. God he really, really hopes this goes well. He knows he'll cry if Bal says no.

Pushing that thought aside, he eagerly leads Bal towards their balcony, winding through the Institute's hallways and out of the building, before climbing up the ladder first and then taking the flowers so he can follow suit. He stands in front of the ladder to block his view, nearly bouncing with anticipation as Bal finally stands in front of him.

"Is... There something I should know about? There's not a fireworks show planned for tonight is there?"

"No, no, nothing like that. I just- I set up a surprise for you."

"You've said that already. What is- Oh!"

Ambrosious steps to the side, showing the picnic set out in their spot, lit by the colorful lights of the city and the gentle glow of the lanterns. Ballister's face goes soft again, and god the Look is back again, full force, as he brings a hand to his heart.

"Oh, Ambrosious... You did this?"

Ambrosious preens as he nods, holding his hand out a bit pointlessly, but he still grins when Bal takes it and lets him draw him into sitting on the blanket. He props the flowers against the wall and basket, dropping down into sitting across from Bal.

"I-I just- I wanted to do something nice for you, for us, you know? I-I, well, I was hoping you would like it."

"Ambrosious, this is the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me."

He flushes red, ducking his head to hide his stupid grin before he starts pulling out the food and plates. He sees Bal's face shift to suspicion when he pulls out the nachos.

"No olives, I made sure of it."

He relaxes, smiling and reaching over to help set up the food. Ambrosious sets the nachos between them, and the world shrinks down to the two of them, like it always does. Ambrosious can't help but admire his friend, he's always looked the best when he's relaxed. His strong demeanor softens to the real Ballister, the one who laughs at bad jokes and teases with a fire and always pops the tabs off of soda cans to collect. He's especially beautiful when he knows no one will bother them, when he completely relaxes and drops his guard, allowing Ambrosious to see part of him that no one else has earned the privilege to.

The folded letter burns in his pocket, and he drifts his hand over it a couple times, having to stop himself from reaching in to grab it while they eat. 

Not too long after they've finished eating, packing the scraps away and brushing the blanket off, Ambrosious and Ballister have moved to the center of the blanket. They're facing the Glorodome, side by side, and Ambrosious bites his lip before trying to pull a smooth trick he's seen a few times. He stretches his arms upward, yawns, and lets his right arm fall back behind Bal's waist, hand gently coming to rest on his hip. Bal laughs softly, and then scoots closer so he's pressed entirely against Ambrosious, laying his head on his shoulder. Ambrosious smiles brightly, laying his head on top of Bal's as they go quiet.

"This was another part of why I brought you up here this early..."

Bal glances up at him, confused, before Ambrosious nudges him gently to draw his gaze back to the horizon.

The sun has dipped close to the line, turning the sky from blue to a beautiful pink, the clouds ranging from purple to red to orange as City is bathed in the lights. Bal gasps softly next to him, his left hand crossing him to squeeze the hand Ambrosious still has on his hip.

"Oh, Ambrosious... It's incredible..."

Ambrosious stares down at Bal, seeing the sunset reflect in his wide eyes.

"Yeah..."

He puts his head back on Bal's, pulling him just that much closer.

"It really is..."

They sit there for longer than Ambrosious can recall, watching as the sky changes with the sun hiding away. Only when the stars begin to shine over them does he allow himself to break the spell, carefully tugging himself away from Bal's side and turning to him. Ballister looks like he's about to get up, but stops when Ambrosious holds a hand out.

"Wait. Um. There's one more thing."

"O...kay?"

Ambrosious clears his throat, pulls out the letter, and hands it to Ballister. He takes a deep breath, watching as Bal carefully opens the letter, and begins.

"Bal... We've known each other for, for a really long time now... And- And I want you to know how much you mean to me. Ever since the day you jumped the fence and broke into my life, I knew I always wanted you by my side. You're incredible, Bal, you're strong, and smart, and handsome, and... And you're my best friend. The day you burst into my life, it changed everything. You shifted my view, changed my heart, stole it, even. You mean the absolute world to me, Bal."

Okay, he's going off script. That's fine, just keep talking.

"You gave my life a purpose. I-I didn't realize how much I was missing before I met you. I love you, Bal..."

TOO MUCH TALKING.

"And- and I was hoping you love me too. I... I was hoping that... That you'd take the chance. Ballister Boldheart, the light of my soul, would- would you be my boyfriend?"

...

Silence.

Dead. Fucking. Silence.

Ballister is staring down at the letter, not even reading it anymore. He isn't moving, isn't speaking, and Ambrosious can't see his face enough to figure out what emotions are running through his mind. His entire body has gone tense, and he starts to think he's really fucked this up. The worst he can say is no? What kind of shit is that!? The worst he can say is that he's disgusted- that he doesn't want to be Ambrosious' friend at all anymore- that he hates him-

"are we not already dating?"

Ambrosious's mind goes blank as he processes the words, and Ballister has finally looked up at him. His hands are shaking from where he's gripping the letter in his lap, and his face is twisted in distressed confusion.

"what?"

Ambrosious winces at his own tone, almost sounding like an accusation even to his own ears. It obviously sounds like one to Ballister, who flinches back and his eyes begin to shine.

"I-I thought- with the festival and- well I guess you never did really ask me, you just asked me to join you, but it was the Valentober Festival, of course I- oh Gloreth I'm sorry, I got this all wrong-"

"You- you thought we were dating?? For a year?"

"I-I thought we were just going slow!! I'm so sorry Ambrosious, I never meant to-"

"So I could have kissed you this whole time?!"

Ballister blinks and stares at him wide-eyed, letter crumpled in his hands. Ambrosious feels his face heat up, but can't stop his mouth from running its own course.

"You- Gloreth, we've been dating for a year and I didn't notice!! I've been holding back so much!!"

"You- that was holding back??"

"Yes!! If I knew we were already together, I would have shouted from the rooftops!!"

They stare at each other in silence for a minute before Ambrosious smiles, followed by Bal giggling, and they set each other off into relieved laughter. Ambrosious scoots forward, cupping Bal's hands where they're still strangling his written speech.

"Phew, okay... So... Uh... I-Is that a yes?"

Bal smiles, and oh- oh now he knows that Look. Now he gets it.

"Yes, Ambrosious, absolutely. Of course I'll be your boyfriend."

Ambrosious grins and draws himself to sit up taller as he feels such a strong wave of emotions barrel through him, victory and love and pride and joy all at once. 

"Can- Bal, can I kiss you?"

"Oh, please-"

Bal's hand is on his cheek and his own are wrapping around his waist before he can even finish talking. Ambrosious pulls him closer and finally, fucking finally, meets him for a kiss. The world around them doesn't fade so much as explode out of view, fireworks setting off in Ambrosious' blood and blinding him to anything that isn't him and Bal and this moment. He hears Bal hum in content against him, and draws him in until they're practically chest to chest, Bal's arms around his shoulders.

Gently, they part again, Ambrosious blinking to try and clear himself out of the daze he finds himself in. Bal is looking at him with that Look- and god, how could he have not have known? How could he have not realized, when he's seen it on himself so many times, caught in pictures staring at his best friend- his boyfriend- it's-

It's love. It's always been love.

"Are you alright?"

Bal says it quietly, chuckling as Ambrosious nods lazily and gives him a dopey grin.

"I love you~"

He drags out the last word, grinning again when it causes him to laugh.

"I love you too, Ambrosious."

He smiles, happiness and love making him dizzy before he stands suddenly, lifting Bal with him.

"I love you so much!"

Bal laughs as he's swung in a circle, and oh- oh, no wonder he thought they were dating! This has happened before, just with different words and oh he's so stupid, how could he have missed this!

"I love you, Bal!!"

He presses smooches to Bal's cheeks and chin and nose and everywhere he can reach, finally setting him down only to be swept into another kiss. He taps his boot on the ground with the excitement that runs through him, and Ballister laughs when he pulls back smiling again. He lets go of Bal's waist, shoving himself to the balcony railing and leaning over it.

"I LOVE BALLISTER BOLDHEART!!!!"

Bal is laughing behind him, holding his arm to keep him from falling over. He spins around and scoops him up again, spinning as they laugh together. When they slowly calm down from their high, they stay pressed against each other. Staring into Bal's eyes, finally knowing what the Look is, and finally being able to act on it.

As he kisses Bal for the third time, he knows there's no place he'd rather be.

He knows, with his whole heart, that this was worth the wait.