Chapter Text
- September 2nd, 2025, Tuesday -
A week had passed since college began. Abe was stressed out, as the professors were eager to push out homework and assignments. However, this also meant he met the one-week mark of living with Topher.
What Abe had learned so far about rooming with Topher is:
A: Topher is a fantastic procrastinator,
B: Topher is surprisingly good friends with Van Gogh,
C: Topher’s weird and odd mannerisms become something you quickly grow used to. Abe wouldn’t call himself a friend of Topher, nowhere near that, but would consider himself tolerant of him. Somewhat.
Speaking of weird and odd mannerisms, Abe hadn’t seen Topher sleep on his bed once. It was always on his beanbag or beneath his mattress. The top of Topher’s bed still held a few piles of things Topher had never put away. Topher was actually starting to make the whole sleeping-under-your-bed thing look appealing, but Abe was far too tall to attempt that.
Abe rolled over. It was only 6:54, and his first class wasn’t until nine. He had been up late studying but thought maybe he should just get up now and have some time to relax.
Abe took a deep breath, then got out of bed. He stretched and rubbed his eyes, then walked into the bathroom. He splashed water on his face, ran his fingers through his hair, and brushed his teeth. While he brushed his teeth, he couldn’t help but note his appearance in the mirror. For the first time since junior year, he had bags under his eyes. Wow. So, college was really starting to take a toll on him. This was the face of 18-year-old Abe Lincoln, tired and unkempt. He felt sick. This felt sick. This didn’t feel right; he was too old. Is this the same face he’d be looking at in twenty years? Would he still be looking at the face of a tired, miserable man? He felt a pit of anxiety in his stomach and ultimately decided to turn away from the mirror.
Abe finished brushing his teeth and moved to the kitchen, his stomach aching. Abe had some leftovers from the cafeteria yesterday (a half-eaten chocolate muffin) and thought he’d settle for that. He was totally down to shove sugar in his face right about now.
Though, when Abe opened the fridge, his chocolate muffin was nowhere to be found. Could it be… no! Topher’s a filthy food thief! That guy really got on his nerves now.
Abe shut the fridge door, now defeated. There wasn’t much left to eat, and Abe didn’t want to continue to buy expensive cafeteria food. He needed to start making his own food.
Aha! That’s it! He’ll make his own breakfast! Albeit, he’s never had to cook a day in his life, but practice makes progress!
He knows just what to do now. Harriet has a waffle maker, and the grocery store is just a block away! It was 7:05 now, and gathering the supplies shouldn’t take too long.
All the negative emotions drained from Abe’s body as he grew more determined to make breakfast. He rushed off to the grocery store with a list of ingredients, dead set on doing this.
✦☆✦☆✦
It didn’t take long for Abe to acquire everything he needed. Abe plugged in the waffle maker and dumped all his ingredients onto the counter. He pulled up a waffle recipe he’d saved a while back, given to him by JFK. He propped his phone against the wall on the counter, reading and re-reading the recipe several times.
“What are you doing?” asked Topher.
Abe looked around for the little man before he heard the shuffling of clothes under him. He stepped back, shrieking as Topher climbed out from the cupboards beneath the sink. Abe stumbled back more, his hand clutched over his chest as he tried to catch his breath.
“Calm down. Jeez, you’re so jumpy all the time.” Topher stood up, dusting himself off. He then eyed what Abe had on the counter.
Abe glared at Topher as if trying to ask, ‘Are you serious?’
“I’m making waffles. You can’t have any because you took my muffin. I wouldn’t have given you any even if you didn’t take my muffin. Make your own.” Abe crossed his arms and looked in the other direction, attempting to be intimidating but coming off more childish.
“You’re gonna burn the dorm down.” Topher opened the cabinet beneath the sink, pulling out a small step stool. He pushed it against the counter Abe was working at and stepped onto it.
“You’re not helping me. I can do this on my own.”
“Abe, do you know what it means to practice what you preach?”
“What do you mean?”
“You told me to not bring trouble to this dorm. If the RA finds out you have a goddamn waffle maker in here, we could both be kicked out. Unlike you, I’ve actually reviewed the rules we’re supposed to follow.”
Topher… wasn’t wrong. When Abe was applying for a dorm online, he, like anybody, had scrolled through the entirety of the text without reading to click ‘I Agree.’
“Fine, Topher. But only because I didn’t know that.”
Topher smirked. “Glad to know you can be sensible. Now, What’s the first step?”
“I’ve already preheated and greased the waffle iron. The first step is to cream the butter and sugar, then add the egg yolks. Go separate the eggs for me while I figure this out. I’m not sure what cream means-”
“Who says you’re running this thing?”
“The person who bought the ingredients.”
“Well, I don’t like being told what to do.”
“And I don’t like guys who eat other guys’ food!”
“Fine.” Topher grabbed the carton of eggs.
Abe shook his head, doing a quick Google search. Apparently, creaming is just… really fast stirring. Something like that– Easy enough. Oh, but he’d have to melt the butter a little. There wasn’t enough time to let it sit. Abe unwrapped a stick of butter and placed it on a glass plate in the microwave for a few seconds. After that, he creamed the butter and sugar together. Then, Topher poured the egg yolks into Abe’s bowl, and Abe mixed it in.
Abe scrolled down through the recipe, re-reading the next couple of steps. “Topher, go whip the egg whites for me. I’m gonna add the cake flour and buttermilk.”
Topher did as told, and Abe alternated between adding the flour and buttermilk. He was a little worried about doing this right, but combining ingredients was also satisfying and fun.
“I whipped the egg whites and added the baking powder. The last step is to fold in my bowl of ingredients with yours.” Topher grabbed a rubber spatula and took control. He poured the egg white-baking powder mixture into the batter and then folded it. Abe stood back and watched, impressed.
“Great!” Abe cheered. “Now all we gotta do is pour this into the waffle maker and cook it for two minutes on each side. I am… not familiar with how to use these at all.”
“Caitlyn used these all the time. Here, let me see.” Topher grabbed the handle of the waffle maker and opened it up, a wave of heat hitting him dead in the face. Topher winced, backing away. He scooped a cup of batter and poured it into the iron, ensuring it spread evenly before clamping it shut. “Go set a timer for two minutes.”
Abe quickly set a timer on his phone. For the first time since they moved in together, the two were being somewhat cooperative. Of course, this doesn’t change Abe’s hate for Topher, as he would never forgive him for what he did, but Abe thinks he prefers it this way rather than arguing.
After they finished cooking the waffles, Abe unplugged the waffle maker. They sat at the kitchen table, trading off the butter and syrup.
It felt strangely homely. Abe’s foster parents never cared to have dinner with him. They would prepare dinner but always went elsewhere, leaving Abe alone at the table. Abe had always wanted his parents to care a little more. It was a nice change, though he wished it was someone other than Topher. They didn’t talk as they ate. Topher scrolled through his phone as Abe thought to himself.
Abe finished his food and washed his plate over the usual stack of dishes in the sink he had gotten used to. Topher had told him he had a system . That system involved washing his dishes once a week. Abe thought it was lazy, but Topher protested, saying he’d rather only get his hands wet once a week rather than several times a day. Abe didn’t understand why Topher was so averse to getting his hands wet, but he guessed that it was fine as long as Topher was actively doing his dishes. Abe preferred doing his dishes as they came so he wouldn’t have to stop and spend half an hour doing them.
By the time Abe washed his plate, it was already time for class. He left without another word to Topher.
✦☆✦☆✦
After American Literary Traditions, Abe spent his half-hour break in the cafeteria with Confucius and JFK again. This had become a routine; it helped Abe stay at ease. He tried so hard to cling to any remnants of high school, as anything that helped him still feel like he was there soothed him. He really needed to get over himself. It had been months since he graduated, yet he was still so fixated on keeping things the same. He kept actively trying to fight off this massive change in his life as if he could reverse the aging he’s done. Though, almost everything was different. He hated it. He’s just glad he gets to go to college with his same high school buddies. Well, except for Gandhi. But what about after college? He’s hardly ever gonna see everyone again. He’ll be stuck living alone with no girlfriend while all his friends branch away to their own lives. That thought made a cold sweat run through his body. Would he be lonely after college?
“Abe? Lincoln. Helllooo? Earth to Abraham?”
Topher was waving his palm in front of Abe’s face. Abe pushes Topher’s hand away, irritated. The two were in Gen-Ed history again, as they were every Tuesday and Thursday.
“What, Topher?” Abe whispered, annoyance lacing his tone.
“Uhm. Did you get the notes for this? I fell asleep. Now that I think about it, you might’ve been asleep too. Asleep with your eyes open.”
“I wasn’t asleep, just spaced out.” Abe stared at the notes on his laptop, staring at the little blinking insertion point. “I don’t know. All I know is we’re learning about ancient Egypt, something about Cleopatra and Julius Caesar. Maybe you should ask them.”
Topher let out a small groan, slumping back in his seat. Abe shrugged, pulling his laptop closer to himself and refocusing on typing notes.
✦☆✦☆✦
When class had ended, Abe recognized that same poster in the hall from last week. Oh, yeah. That thing was today. He’d almost forgotten! He figured he’d just go now.
Abe turned to walk in the opposite direction, which must’ve caught Topher’s attention since Topher asked: “Where do you think you’re going?”
Abe stopped in his tracks. “Why does it matter to you?”
“I dunno. Usually, we walk the same way.”
“None of your business, Topher. But if it was your business, I’d tell you I’m headed to the club rush event at the recreation center.”
“Oh, well, I guess I’ll come along. I don’t know if I’ll join anything, though.”
Abe just sighed. Tolerating Topher was getting annoying. “Fine. But just walk behind me and don’t say anything like we do whenever we walk back to the dorm.”
“Fine.”
The two made their way to the rec center, which was essentially the gymnasium, but they just had fancy words for it. All across the gymnasium were booths and colorful decorations advertising each club. Abe could see Joan of Arc from across the room and quickly abandoned Topher for her.
“Hey, Joan!” Abe smiled at Joan, running up to her and hugging her.
Joan chuckled, hugging Abe back. “What’s got you all happy?”
“Nothin’ much. Just glad to see you, I suppose.” Abe let go of Joan. From the corner of his eye, he could see Topher standing where he’d just left him, staring over at him and Joan in a hopeless way. He must’ve caught Abe looking at him because he quickly turned in the other direction and walked off.
“Weird guy, isn’t he?” said Joan.
“Yeah…”
“How’s rooming with him been?”
“It started out awful, but now it’s a bit tolerable. A lot of the time, he’s just… hiding under his bed. Or... other places. So, it’s almost like he’s not even there half the time.”
“Yeah. He’s a freak, that’s for sure. Speaking of roommates, I thought getting Frida as a dorm mate would be awesome.”
“Is it not? What’s wrong with Frida?”
“She always has Cleo over. It’s gross. Cleo doesn’t even like me; she just pretends to because of Frida! Sometimes, I just wanna lay around on the couch eating cereal in my underwear and just relax! But they’re always practically fucking on the couch! It’s like they don’t even acknowledge that I’m there.”
“Yeesh, that’s rough,” replied Abe. Maybe if he was still a junior in high school, he’d find that kind of hot. Now, he’d probably just find it annoying.
“Yeah, I know. I mean, I still like Frida as a friend and all, but sometimes I really do feel like I get more along with my guy friends.”
“I get it, Joan. Say, wanna hang out with me and the guys sometime soon? We meet in the cafeteria every Tuesday and Thursday around 10:15 and every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday around 11:05. We may also have some sort of outing this weekend; I’d be happy if you came along!” If Abe was a dog, he’d be wagging his tail. Joan would always be his comfort person to be around, whether they were dating or not.
“That sounds nice. I’ll try to make it sometime. I’d also love to join you guys.”
“Great! Anyway, what clubs were you thinking about joining?” Abe walked ahead so they could start viewing the booths.
“Probably something academic. Speaking of academics, I’ve been trying to get a study group together for a few of my classes. Harriet has already somehow formed multiple study groups for hers. She said that once she’s done with freshman year, she’s gonna transfer to a big acting school in New York. She’s really on top of things right now, and I’m super jealous.”
“Yeah, I get that. I’ve been stressed recently, too. I was up late studying last night, and I don’t even think I understood half the notes I wrote down. A study group would be nice.”
“Just remember to get some sleep, Abe.”
Abe and Joan spent the remainder of their time there chatting and spending time at the booths. Abe decided to join a book club, while Joan found an academic club related to her major. Afterward, Abe left, Topher completely omitting his mind.
Abe returned to the dorm around 1:30, flopping onto his bed. He knew he had an assignment or two that needed to be done, but he could already feel his body shutting down. Maybe he’d just lay here a while, then get up. Yeah, that sounded nice.
Abe closed his eyes, rolling over and hugging his pillow to his chest. Just a few minutes, he promised himself.
When he opened his eyes again, it was dark. Fuck.
Abe sat up in his bed, rubbing his eyes. He glanced around the room, seeing Topher playing his Nintendo Switch on his beanbag. Topher also had his laptop open and off to the side, his assignment from Gen-Ed History pulled up, untouched.
Abe grabbed his phone off the nightstand. It was nine in the evening!
“Shit…” Abe groaned, running his fingers through his hair. He seriously just screwed up his sleep schedule. Maybe if he had a better roommate, he would’ve had someone to wake him up.
Abe looked at Topher again. That bastard was just sitting there playing his games without a care in the world!
Abe hopped off his bed, having the immediate urge to leave. Maybe it was Topher’s presence, or perhaps it was just from the stuffy feeling of being in this room too long. He slipped on his shoes and shoved his keycard into his back pocket. He stepped out into the hallway, looking both ways as if he was crossing the street. Nobody was around.
He shut the door behind himself, walking down the hall until he reached the end, leading him to a lounge area. He approached a vending machine that sat in the corner, fishing a few quarters out of his pocket to buy himself a pack of crackers.
When he was done, he turned back around, a cracker already halfway in his mouth. That’s when he saw Joan and Frida entering the lounge, chatting about something. When the two noticed him, they immediately stopped the chatter and looked at Abe.
“Oh, hey guys,” said Abe.
“Sup, Abe,” replied Frida.
“What are you guys doing around so late?”
Frida and Joan stared at each other momentarily, like they were debating whether to tell him. Finally, Frida nodded, and Joan turned her attention towards Abe.
“Just girl problems, Abe. Girl relationship problems,” said Joan.
“Yeah,” Frida chimed in. “Me and Clee Clee have been having some disagreements lately, a lot of it having to do with college, and I’m just not sure what to do. I mean, I’m still chill like always, but whenever it comes to Cleo, something is always different.”
Ah. More relationship problems.
“Well, what do you guys disagree about? Maybe I can offer a suggestion,” asked Abe.
“Well–” Just as Frida began to speak, a certain someone entered the room. That someone being Topher Bus, of course.
Joan and Frida glared at Topher while Abe nervously fidgeted with his hands. Part of him was starting to feel like Topher was his responsibility.
“Y’know, I’ve had my fair share of relationship problems, too,” Topher interjected.
“Go away, Topher,” said Joan.
“Yeah. We’re trying to have girl talk, and you don’t look like a girl,” added Frida.
Topher rolled his eyes. “Last time I checked, Abe wasn’t a girl either.”
“Abe is different,” Joan responded. “He’s so sensitive and emotional and a little effeminate that he’s almost like a girl.”
“Hey–” Abe rejoined, looking over at Joan.
“Fine, Topher,” Frida plopped onto one of the couches, prompting Abe and Joan to do the same. “Tell us, what relationship problems could you possibly have?”
Topher appeared shocked and nervous, as if he hadn’t expected to get this far. “Well– uhm–”
“Didn’t you have a crush on Joan in junior year?”
“Well, yeah.”
Joan had a look of disgust on her face.
Abe winced. That brought up many memories for him: the blackmailing, Miss Grumbles, the manipulation. Sometimes, it was easy to forget why he hated Topher because Topher didn’t look like the manipulative type of guy. When Abe first met Topher, he just seemed like a creepy, antisocial, but misunderstood weirdo.
Frida and Topher appeared to be arguing, but Abe wasn’t listening. He was wholly spaced out at this point, eating his crackers. Abe couldn’t imagine Topher dating Joan. He undoubtedly felt disgusted by that. Could he imagine Topher dating anybody, though? He couldn’t imagine anyone who’d want Topher. Topher didn’t even seem like the kind of person who’d be too keen on physical affection. He did always have a habit of grabbing Abe’s hand to drag him places, but it wasn’t in an affectionate sort of way. It was more in a controlling kind of way.
Abe had finished his crackers, and Topher and Frida were still arguing.
Abe stood up and shoved the plastic wrapper into his pocket. “C’mon, Topher. Let’s just go back to our dorm.”
Topher and Frida both went quiet and then Topher looked over at Abe.
“Fine,” Topher sighed, turning away from Frida and Joan and walking over to Abe.
“Thank you,” Abe replied dejectedly.
“Though, I wish you’d let me educate these girls on how–”
“We’re done, Topher! Hahah– I’ll talk to you guys later,” Abe waved to Joan and Frida before grabbing Topher’s wrist and leading him back down the hall. “Why’d you even come to the lounge anyway? Don’t you normally just sit around all day?”
“Actually, I came specifically to get you. I momentarily left the room to return something to Van Gogh, and on my way back, I realized I’d forgotten my keycard in the room.”
“And what makes you think I would’ve stopped to let you in?”
Topher shrugged. “You usually don’t say no to things.”
Well… that was true.
Abe used his keycard to unlock the dorm, allowing Topher to enter first. Once inside, he slid off his shoes and laid on his bed. Maybe he’d take some melatonin.
Topher was in the kitchen, standing there holding the fridge open. It’s not like they had that much food anyway, so he wasn’t sure what Topher had to stand there for so long deciding for. Topher made an annoyed sigh, shutting the fridge door.
“I’m ordering pizza,” announced Topher. “Do you want anything?”
Abe picked his head up, surprised. “Really?”
“Er, yeah… Don’t look all happy about it, though. It sort of grosses me out. And don’t think too much of it. I’m just sorry for eating your muffin or whatever.”
“You’re… sorry? You’re actually sorry?”
“Yeah. So just hurry up and tell me what you want before I regret this.”