Archive of Our Own ^beta

Cole learned many things about the Shimada clan during his time as a bodyguard to the prince of crime, Genji. He learned that the Shimada clan was in the process of wiping out the rest of their competition, leaving only the Hashimoto left to try to claim Hanamura as their territory.

He learned that the Shimada clan wasn’t just trying to run a crime syndicate, but they were attempting to take over Japan one city at a time. Once they took control of Hanamura they were going to try to grow their empire until Japan was theirs, and after that they would continue to branch out to other countries.

Cole was undercover for Overwatch, relaying every bit of information back to his commander, Gabriel Reyes. With all the information he had recorded, Overwatch grew closer to dispatching a team to take down the Shimada clan so that they couldn’t spread their power and conquer Japan.

Cole learned everything from the ways in which the Shimada clan attacked to their connections to various organizations like Talon. Yet, Cole didn’t just learn about the clan.

He learned about Genji, too.

Cole knew not to get attached to Genji, especially because Gabriel had drilled into his head that he was on a mission and he would have to disappear when it was over. Cole knew he shouldn’t grow close to Genji, but there was something about him that made him break all his rules.

He learned that Genji was the crowned prince of crime but he shirked on his clan duties at every given opportunity. Genji often missed clan meetings in favor of having men take body shots off of him. Genji disappeared on clan missions the second he passed a club, finding pole dancing to be a better use of his precious time than executing enemies.

Cole came to find that Genji wanted nothing to do with his clan because they had forced him to become someone he never wanted to be. Over time, Genji got back at the clan by disobeying them every time the opportunity presented itself.

Other than being a disobedient little shit, Cole had come to know Genji as a sensitive and compassionate soul. Genji put on the façade as the Shimada who laughed the loudest and shined the brightest when in reality he was hurting inside, feeling like he could never live up to the impossibly high standards his father and elders set for him.

Genji knew he could never be what his clan wanted him to be, nor did he ever want that life. To cope with the pain and constant looks of disappointment thrown his way, he turned to a life of partying and drinking.

“You’re gonna get yourself killed if you keep this shit up, darlin’.” Cole huffed as he carried a drunk Genji on his back.

“And what do you care?” Genji quipped, slurring his words. “We aren’t paying you to give a shit about me and my bad choices. Just carry me home.”

Cole shook his head, “You ain’t payin’ me to care but I do. You ain’t gotta throw your life away like this, sugar.”

“You’re wasting your time caring about me…” Genji rested his head on Cole’s shoulder, whispering in his ear, “At least that’s what the elders say.”

“I ain’t see it that way.” Cole chuckled, earning a whine from Genji. “I’d say you’re worth me carin’ about you, sweetheart.”

“Then you are a fool.” Genji hummed.

“Maybe I am.”

Cole didn’t realize that he and Genji would grow closer to one another after that night. He knew he had said too much the moment he told Genji that he cared, but he couldn’t stop his feelings from charging forward like a herd of wild stallions.

Cole had come to learn that Genji liked it when he held his hand, as well as when he gave a squeeze when he was feeling anxious or scared. Genji liked the feeling of Cole’s strong arms wrapped around his waist, always feeling like those arms felt more like home than these dreary castle walls were.

Cole learned that Genji liked to be taken care of, whether it came in the form of a cowboy whispering sweet nothings in his ear or feeling strong yet warm hands holding him still while they made love under the light of the moon and a sea of stars.

“Make love to me, Jesse.” Genji murmured, looking into his lover’s eyes like he’d die if he couldn’t see those whiskey orbs. “Please… I want you to be the first.”

“Plenty of men have fucked you before. I ain’t your first.” Cole furrowed his brow, his heart cracking at the use of his undercover name.

“Maybe so…” Genji reached his hands up and cupped Cole’s face. “But I have never let anyone make love to me... and I want you to be the one, the only one.”

Cole leaned down and captured his lips in a kiss, one that was soft and slow. As their lips moved against each other’s they were telling the other that this was what they wanted, that they were what they wanted.

“If you want love we’ll make it, angel.” Cole whispered against Genji’s velvet lips.

“I’m yours, Jesse.” Genji smiled, surrendering himself to a man whose true name he didn’t even know.

“You’ve got me, honey bee.”

How Cole’s heart ached the entire time he made love to Genji. With each moan of his fake name he resisted the urge to cry, to tell Genji that he wasn’t the man he thought he was. He called Cole’s undercover name like it belonged to someone good, and that killed him.

Cole wished he could’ve said that he regretted telling Genji that he could love him that night, but he didn’t. He knew he would’ve been lying if he said that he regretting loving Genji.

“J-Jesse!” Genji moaned, clawing at Cole’s back and leaving little bruises in the shape of his fingertips.

“You’re takin’ me so good, darlin’.” Cole groaned, nearly bending Genji in half as he thrusted into him. “Wish you could see yourself… lookin’ like somethin’ outta a dirty dream.”

“Do I look better than your dreams?” Genji asked, gasping when Cole found that sweet spot and made it his mission to hit it with every slow and sensual thrust.

“You look like everythin’ I’ve ever wanted.” Cole confessed, unable to stop his heart from taking the reins. “I could love you, Genji, I know I could.”

“I have never loved another…” Genji felt tears stinging at his eyes, smiling. “But I know I could love you, Jesse.”

Cole… call me Cole.

Cole woke up in a cold sweat as that memory played through his mind, making him feel like he was having a nightmare rather than a sweet dream. Cole looked at the beautiful form sleeping beside him and he frowned, knowing he didn’t deserve Genji.

Cole was thankful that Genji was a heavy sleeper because it allowed him to untangle himself from his octopus of a lover without waking him. Cole rolled out of bed and put his spurs on, along with some of his other articles of clothing.

He reached for a cigarillo and walked towards the balcony. He lit the cigarillo and breathed in on it, savoring the feeling of the heat burning the back of his throat. He felt like he deserved that little bit of pain, especially after deceiving Genji for months.

Cole thought that Genji was someone who deserved the world, especially since the world never gave a shit about him. Cole had seen the way that his clan used him and berated him both to his face and behind his back, but Genji took it all with a smile on his face and a broken heart in his chest.

Genji didn’t deserve a man who was using the role as his bodyguard to gather intel on his clan. Genji didn’t deserve a man who gave him a false name and a biography that was created by a commanding officer. Genji didn’t deserve to make love with a man who didn’t earn that through being an honest and good natured human being.

Cole was brought out of his thoughts when he felt his communicator vibrating in his pants pocket. He bit down on the cigarillo to hold it in place while he fished in his pocket, retrieving his communicator and holding it out.

“Are you in a secure location?” Gabriel’s face appeared in a small blue holographic form.

Cole looked over his shoulder to see Genji still asleep, “Yeah, I should be good for a couple minutes.”

“Good. Any updates on the clan?” Gabriel questioned, straight to the point as always.

“Somethin’ ain’t feel right, boss. The elders been meetin’ more often.” Cole answered, sighing. “I ain’t quite sure what it all means yet.”

“Is the prince not invited to those meetings?” Gabriel sounded confused. “You should be in those meetings or have him tell you about them if he’s in them.”

Cole shook his head, “He ain’t been in any of those ones but his older brother is.”

“Hanzo?”

“Yeah, Hanzo’s been at those ones and he ain’t look too happy when he gets outta them.” Cole relayed, missing how Genji’s side of the bed was now empty.

“Figure out what’s going on and report back to me, got it?” Gabriel ordered.

“You got it, boss.”

“I know this isn’t easy but you’re doing good, Cassidy.” Gabriel nodded, a faint smile on his face. “Keep it up and you’ll be home soon.”

With one last nod from Cole, he turned off the communicator and stuffed it back into his pocket. He took another drag from his cigarillo, taking his sweet time finishing it off before he chucked it off the balcony.

Cole debated on reaching for another cigarillo when the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. His breath hitched as he got the feeling that he wasn’t alone. Cole quickly drew his gun and turned around, pointing it at the only man he had ever loved.

“Oh, Genji… it’s just you.” Cole breathed a sigh of relief, lowering his gun. He chuckled, “You know you got them little cat feet so you can’t go ‘round sneakin’ up on me, sweet thing.”

Genji folded his arms in front of his chest, rolling his eyes, “Oh, like you’ve gone sneaking around Shimada castle looking for intel?”

“What? Darlin’, what are you talkin’ about?” Cole knit his eyebrows together in confusion, knowing he was playing a risky game right now.

“Don’t play dumb with me, Jesse.” Genji hissed. “If that’s even your real name.”

“Take it easy there, sweetheart.” Cole raised his hands like he was surrendering. “It’s late and you’re probably tired. We can talk about everythin’ in the-“

“Don’t you dare try to blame me when you’ve been caught! I’m not crazy so don’t you fucking dare try to make me feel like I am!” Genji growled, nearly making Cole have to take a step backwards.

Cole gulped, “Honey bee, I ain’t want any trouble.”

“Then why did you come here searching for it?” Genji cocked an eyebrow, unamused. “You came to Shimada castle looking for trouble and you found it so fucking stand there and take it.”

“Darlin’-“

“And stop with those empty pet names!” Genji nearly snarled. “You didn’t mean them when you started calling me them and you sure as hell don’t mean them now!”

Cole argued, “I’ve always meant it when I called you all them sweet names!”

“Just like how you always meant to betray me?” Genji asked, sounding both enraged and hurt.

“I ain’t betray you or nothin’ like that!” Cole lied.

“Stop lying to me, Jesse!” Genji nearly shouted, his nails digging into his skin and creating little crescent moons. “I heard you talking to your commander! I know you’ve been using me the whole time!”

Cole opened his mouth to disagree but he knew it was pointless, especially when he had been caught. Cole shook his head, he wondered if Genji had made him believe he was a heavy sleeper this whole time so he could catch him vulnerable like this or if tonight he had just been unlucky.

Whatever happened to lead to this moment didn’t matter anymore, not when Cole was stuck between lying through his teeth to Genji or admitting to all the atrocities he had committed during his stay at Shimada castle.

“I’m sorry, darlin’.” Cole sighed in defeat. “You were never supposed to get mixed in the cross fire or nothin’ like that.”

“Are you sorry I caught you or that you took advantage of me?” Genji inquired, his anger seeming to radiate from his body like heat waves.

“I-“

“I told you so much about my clan… so much about me!” Genji had tears glistening in his eyes but he didn’t stop, he couldn’t. “I gave you myself and you still sought to betray me the entire time!”

Cole reached out to hold onto Genji when he found himself being punched in the face. Cole staggered backwards, his back colliding with the balcony’s railing. He reached his hand to his nose, wincing at both the pain and the blood.

“You got some left hook on you, sweetheart, that’s for sure.” Cole complimented, which only seemed to piss Genji off more.

“Do you think this is funny?” Genji clenched his fists. “You think betraying my clan is funny? Do you think using me is funny?!”

“No, no, no! I ain’t think none of that is funny, sugar!” Cole frantically shook his head, pleading. “I ain’t ever mean for any of this to happen but it did and I’m sorry!”

Genji clamped his eyes shut, his tears flowing down, “The elders were right… I really am a foolish little sparrow.”

“Genji-“

“I let you into my home, my life, my heart… only for you to betray me.” Genji choked back a sob, wrapping his arms around himself in a lonely embrace. “And none of it meant anything to you… I never meant anything to you.”

“That’s not true!” Cole fearlessly raced forward and brought Genji into his arms. “It might have been my mission to gather intel on your clan but you made me break all my rules.”

Genji shook his head against Cole’s chest, weakly attempting to break free. Genji’s brain was insisting that he get as far away from that man as possible while his heart refused to leave the only man he had ever loved.

“Let go of me!” Genji hissed.

“My boss told me not to get attached but, sweetheart, I couldn’t help it.” Cole held onto Genji tighter, refusing to lose the love of his life. “I mean look at you… you’re beautiful.”

“You already claimed my body in its most vulnerable form…” Genji pounded his small fists against Cole’s chest, sobbing, “What more do you want from me?”

Cole shook his head, “It ain’t about your body or what you can give me, angel. Everythin’ about you is beautiful.”

“I can’t believe a word you say anymore.” Genji whimpered pitifully.

“Darlin’-“

“I welcomed you into my life even after I told you how hard that is for me.” Genji tore himself away from Cole so that he could look into his eyes. “How could you be so heartless to continue with your mission after knowing that?”

Cole winced like he had been struck again, but it was only Genji’s words cutting through him like knives. Cole hated to admit that Genji had a point. Only someone truly heartless could continue to deceive someone after knowing how terrifying it was to be vulnerable with another.

Cole was sure that Gabriel would argue that he wasn’t heartless and that he was only following orders. Yet, this was the first time following orders made Cole feel like his heart was shattering into a million pieces.

“I want you to leave.” Genji removed himself from Cole, and the cowboy felt their love slipping through his fingers.

“Come with me.” Cole’s words slipped past his lips before he could stop them.

“Come with you? Are you stupid?” Genji furrowed his brows. “Why the hell would I want to go anywhere with you?”

“Your clan’s up to somethin’ and I’m afraid you’re gonna get hurt.” Cole answered, pleading.

Genji wiped his tears away with the back of his sleeve, chuckling darkly, “No matter what I do, leave or stay, I’m going to get hurt. Don’t you understand that?”

“It’d hurt less if you came with me.” Cole urged.

“I expect my clan to hurt me.” Genji stepped back, creating distance between them. “But I never expected you to hurt me. I can’t trust you.”

“And you can trust your clan?” Cole countered, bewildered. “I told you they’re plottin’ somethin’ and you ain’t got a clue as to what’s comin’ your way because they ain’t tellin’ you shit!”

Genji shook his head, “I’m not going with you, Jesse.”

“Cole Cassidy.”

“What?” Genji tilted his head in confusion.

“If you really want me to leave then you should know my real name.” Cole removed his hat from his head and placed it over his heart, bowing in greeting. “The name’s Cole Cassidy.”

“So, even your name was a lie?” Genji frowned.

“I’m sorry, Genji.” Cole placed his hat back atop his head where it belonged. “If I could go back and change things-“

“You wouldn’t.” Genji interrupted. “You’ve made it clear that mission success is all that matters… so go on. Go complete your mission.”

Cole stepped forward, only to dive out of the way to avoid the shuriken that Genji fired his way. Genji had fresh tears spilling down his cheeks as he slid three new shuriken between his fingers.

“Genji-“

“I want you to go and I want you to take my heart with you. I don’t want it anymore.” Genji cried, his shoulders shaking.

Cole resisted the urge to aim his gun at Genji, replying, “But, darlin’, your heart’s the prettiest thing about you.”

“Then you won’t mind taking it with you on your way out.” Genji returned, his wit still as quick as a whip even when he was a crying mess.

“I ain’t gonna leave you behind.”

Genji’s grip tightened on his shuriken, “If you don’t leave now then I’ll have no choice but to throw these at you again… and this time I won’t be so nice.”

“At least take my communicator.” Cole held his communicator out for Genji to take, knowing full well he was risking losing an arm. “If you need me then you can call me.”

“I won’t need you.” Genji glared.

“Then you ain’t gonna mind me leavin’ it here.” Cole returned with a grin, placing the communicator on the ground. “I’d come runnin’ if you asked me to, sweet thing. Remember that.”

Genji watched with blurred vision as the man he waited his whole life for stepped towards the railing of the balcony and got ready to disappear into the night like he was nothing more than a figment of his imagination.

Cole paused, looking over his shoulder, “I meant it when I said I could love you, sweetheart. I still mean it now.”

“Goodbye, Cole.”

Cole shook his head and jumped from the balcony, vanishing into the shadows like a thief in the night. Cole wasn’t a thief that was searching for precious jewels or family secrets, rather all he wanted was Genji’s heart, and he got it.

Genji walked towards the communicator and stared at it longingly. He placed his shuriken on the ground in favor of picking up the communicator, the last piece of Cole that he could hold onto.

Suddenly, Genji darted from his room and towards the courtyard that Cole would have slipped out of. Genji dropped to his knees at the sight of the courtyard door open, flapping in the gentle night breeze.

Cole really was gone.

Genji brought the communicator close to his chest as he wailed into the night. He cried to the Heavens, begging them to tell him why they would choose him to torture like this. He wanted to know why he would be blessed with someone so perfect, only for them to hurt him worse than the clan could have.

Genji wished that he could have regretted those late nights with Cole and those early mornings, whispering like they were passing notes in secrecy. Genji wished he could have regretted giving so much of himself to another, but he didn’t.

He didn’t regret a thing.

Genji felt an emptiness in his chest, no doubt from Cole actually taking his heart with him. The farther Cole was from him, the greater the pain in his chest was. Genji shook his head, knowing that only love could hurt like this.

It was as Genji was drying his tears that he heard footsteps growing louder in the distance. As much as he hoped that those footsteps would belong to Cole, he knew it wasn’t him.

Genji closed his eyes as he felt drops of rain fall from above, his tears mixing with them. Genji normally wasn’t a fan of the rain, but right now he was grateful that it could hide his tears from his older brother.

If Genji had turned around then he would’ve seen how Hanzo was standing behind him, his twin blades drawn.

“Genji… we need to talk.”