Archive of Our Own ^beta

Blitz is a heavy sleeper, all things considered. Many a night in his 20s was spent blacked out in a college dorm, green room, friend’s living room, enemy’s living room. At that point he would go all rag doll, dead to the heavens and hells and those around him. It was a weird sort of armadillo-like defense maneuver; “hey I’m just this little limp guy, I can’t hurt no-one”. 

Stolas’ bed held his paperweight body with ease. It took a lot to jostle him awake. It took intentionally trying to wake him up to even consider making a decision to maybe become awake at a certain point in the future. 

His alarm went off. 

You could also be an alarm clock, that would work too. 

Blitz whipped his tail to smack at the phone screen but found it hitting up against something that wasn’t the bed. His eyes still closed he sat up and flung himself in the direction of the noise, tripping over what felt like a large wooden log right in the middle of the bed. 

“Motherf-“ he yelped before slamming onto the ground. He skittered up to his phone on the nightstand, reached his hand up frantically and silenced it. “THERE. That’ll learn ya, waking me on a damn weekend like I programmed you to.” 

He finally fully opened his eyes and turned back to the bed. 

“Oh shit”

A panic attack never just starts for most people. It usually is a result of a prolonged stressful experience. A bunch of things hitting at once, squeezing your brain and nerves into a vice. And then you’re stuck in it until you can either ride it out or, if you’re lucky, have someone talk you through it. 

Blitz was asleep. So Stolas had had to ride it out. 

It began with being awoken in the middle of the night by a nervous brain. Stolas’ brain was in treadmill mode as he anxiously scrolled through his phone, desperate for some sort of comfort to latch onto so he didn’t have to think about- 

Nevermind. Here it was. In full display. 

All over social media. Photos taken of Stolas and Blitz exiting a movie theatre. It was a pleasant date, they weren’t hassled on their way in. They were making no secrets about their relationship these days. What was the point? People find out eventually. And Stolas could either fiscally or literally destroy anyone who dared to make a Thing out of it all. 

On their way out a wave of paparazzi lunged towards them, tipped off by a now-penalized theatre employee needing some quick cash. “I don’t blame the guy needing the dough but shit, man, I was trying to take him out on a regular ass date and you fuckers can’t leave well enough alone,” Blitz yelled at the crowd, flashing his flintlock at the crowd in an effort to diffuse things. It didn’t really work as now the headlines went from PRINCE AND IMP OUT ON THE TOWN to PRINCE AND VIOLENT, RUDE IMP OUT ON THE TOWN. 

Stolas didn’t really give a shit about his own reputation at this point. It was what it was. He and his daughter were happy, that’s what was important. And the press could say anything about him and it would slide off him like water off an eldritch demon’s back. 

His panic came from bringing Blitz into the fold. He didn’t deserve this negative press. His business deserved to succeed off of their merits and not because the boss was dating a prince. They had already done so much to repair things on that end. 

And yet all over the articles, mentions of Stolas being a Favors for Favors sugar-daddy type, trading sex for access to the living world. It was like everything they had worked on, everything spoken about, everything fought and cried and argued and bled for had been undone in a single instant. To many who read this it was all they would be; a scandal. Something to look at with shame. 

And he couldn’t bear Blitz dealing with that shame. 

He hunched over, his breathing becoming erratic, his form glowing. Growing. 

“Blitz…please wake up…please…help” distorted words pinched through the air. Blitz stirred but never awoke, deep in a dream about god knows what (horses). Bones jutted out, the bed creaked, black feathers littered the space around them both. Stolas had gone feral with anxiety, his massive limbs curled up on themselves. His breathing rumbled the room. His eyes, blood red and many of them, clenched furiously. He was gone.

“Fuck, ok, ok,” Blitz said, assessing the situation. “It’s just Stolas, it’s just your boyfriend, he’s just really…really, really fucking big”

He stood to the side of the bed, looking up and down. 

“Panic attack. Ok. You’ve handled this before.” 

He looked at his phone. 

7:20 AM

“Shit,” Blitz muttered, firing off a text to the work group chat. 

Cmmin l8 today, stol problem, evrythns good. Hug bird. 

He muted the phone and put it back on the side table. He put his hands on his hips and circled the bed, taking in every detail. 

Of course in this form Stolas was magnificent. Demonic, glorious, mysterious. They had even experimented with this form during sex before but that was a size difference too far. Still made him cum like a fucking fire hydrant goddammit, Blitz thought. 

This was different. He had never seen something so large and in the way look this pent up and pathetic. And not even the fun, kinky kind of pathetic. Stolas was hooting slowly, sadly, his form trembling as he slept restlessly. He was in rough shape. 

“Tea,” Blitz said, running to the kitchen.

“Via, sweetie, your dad isn’t feeling good” 

“No shit he isn’t feeling good, have you seen what everyone’s been posting about?” 

Octavia had come into the kitchen when she heard the racket that was Blitz scrounging for the tea kettle. She held up her phone to Blitz whose eyes went wide, then narrowed in frustration. 

“Rude and violent? Isn’t that redundant?” Blitz scoffed. 

“This is serious, Blitz,” 

“No it fucking isn’t. Not for me. I don’t care what they say about me in these rags. Business gets helped either way. And you’re nowhere to be seen in this whole fucking story”

Blitz grabbed the tea bags from the pantry. Constant Criticism. Spicy, energized, but oddly calming. 

“The only one who it’s serious for is for the 20 foot owl in our bed, and I’m willingly taking-“ 

Blitz glanced at the stove clock. 

“-an entire day off now it seems to take care of him.” 

“Make it sound like even more of a chore, why don’t you?” Octavia bit out. 

“Hey!”

Blitz really didn’t want to yell at Octavia, who didn’t deserve it and was only pointing things out based on a track record he was desperately trying to undo. He breathed in, then out. 

“I absolutely deserved that, and I appreciate a well-placed dig so well done” 

“Thank you?” Via replied, still angry but willing to hear him out. 

“I’ve seen your dad do this before. Never in the middle of the night, but I’ve been with him through a few of these to know how to help him. And I’m going to help him. And I want to help him. Actively.” 

Via tapped her foot nervously and grimaced at the imp attempting to make nice and prove loyalty in the middle of her kitchen. 

“He likes the vanilla creamer” she said. 

“Good girl,” Blitz hopped up and gave Via’s head a tussle before running over to the fridge and grabbing the vanilla creamer, putting it on a tea tray with the hot kettle and two mugs. “Now, I’m going back up there. No matter what you hear do not open the door.” 

“Gross, fuck” 

“I was joking, but also uh…he gets pretty loud like this so maybe put on some headphones in case I startle him” 

Via looked at him softer, raising an eyebrow. 

“You really love my dad, don’t you?” 

“Kid, I’m absolutely stupid for your dad,” he replied. “Or just stupid”

“Or just stupid” 

“Yeah” 

He carefully started making his way back up the stairs. Once more unto the breach.

Blitz entered the bedroom back first, pushing the door open with his foot. 

“Okay, bud, I got some-bffgh” he started saying before he swung around to get a face full of stone black feathers. He carefully maneuvered himself and the tea tray sideways, placing the tray down on a nearby table. 

Stolas was awake. And bigger. And a little less easy to make out due to his size and his form eclipsing nearly every light source in the room. He was both predator and prey, a dark visage overcome with discomfort and fury simultaneously. His beak, the size of a mid-sized Sedan, trembled. His eyes- how many were there now? Six? Ten?- darted out in multiple directions. The noises that rumbled out from his throat were the combination of an owl’s breath and a wind turbine on/off switch being flicked indiscriminately. 

Blitz peeked through what little cracks in the void-like monster bird he could see to determine that, yes, the bed was now destroyed. 

He nodded slowly. He was calm. He had to be calm. Because if he was gonna flip out he might not make it out of here alive. He had seen that dinosaur movie before. Slow movements. Direct eye contact. 

“Stolas?” He called out. Stolas’ head swung around to meet him and he got a full view of his face. This wasn’t a beast in search of flesh to tear asunder, this was a trapped animal unable to get free. 

“Hey, come on down here, babe, It’s okay.” Blitz put his arms out. Open. They were trembling but they were open. 

Stolas growled but lowered his head to Blitz’s face level, which wasn’t exactly fair considering his face now equaled the size and diameter of 20 of Blitz smushed together into a ball. 

“Hot ham and rolls, Stol, you are fucking ginormous, buddy,” he whispered. His eyes darted around to find just one place he could touch on his face. He walked forward with a hand outstretched. Stolas flinched and hooted frightfully. 

“Shhh, hey, it’s me. Not gonna hurt you.” 

Blitz took one more step and pressed a hand against the right side of Stolas’ face. Gentle pressure, don’t pet backwards, smooth feathers forward. Little things he picked up with animals in the circus came back to help him in this ridiculous situation. Perfect. 

He wrapped both arms around the space of feathers in a gentle embrace. He could feel Stolas stiff up slightly for a moment. But he then started to feel a slow deflation underneath. 

“There we go,” Blitz whispered. “That’s it. Doing good for me, babe.” 

The shuddering breaths and groans grumbling up through Stolas’ throat gradually began to calm into a sort of wounded coo. They weren’t out of the woods yet. 

“I think you’re too big for the room right now,” Blitz hushed. “Can you get up to the roof and we can continue this little hug-out? Can you do that for me, Stol?”

Stolas stood up and began to hunch over, bending his limbs and back to turn himself around to face the balcony doors. Those poor balcony doors. They were decimated as Stolas pushed himself through and began his slow climb onto the roof of the palace. 

Whatever, he can magic that shit back to normal or hire someone to fix it. 

Blitz grabbed the tea tray and started following Stolas out of the doors. When most of him was halfway up the walls Blitz used a free hand to grab onto part of Stolas’ tail. He and the tea tray were hoisted up as the climb continued all the way to the roof.

“Wide…open…spaces,” Blitz accentuated, pointing out with both hands at the open skyline of Pride. The pentagram sun shone out through a crimson sky, hitting every building, tree, and giant bird creature with a pleasant red halo. One might be tempted to call it bucolic.

Stolas was halfway between a perch and a pounce on the roof of the palace. He was definitely calmer than how he was smushed in the bedroom. Blitz could almost hear the creaks in Stolas’ bones as his wingspan unfolded and his legs outstretched as he attempted to sit down. 

“Easy there,” Blitz said. He put his arms out, he wasn’t sure why. Stolas was going to wobble and get his roof legs on his own time. Maybe it was that thing folks do when they see people struggling with furniture up a staircase and they feel the instinctual need to either help or appear helpful. As of right now Blitz just had to let Stolas get his footing. 

Stolas bent back his legs and proceeded to enter Loaf Mode, curling around himself in a gigantic mound of inky feathers. 

Blitz walked over and put a hand on a patch of Stolas, applying gentle pressure. 

“Gonna climb on top of you now,” he said. “I hear it helps. Also you’re like a gigantic pillow right now and I’d be pretty stupid not to try, right?” 

Something that sounded like a laugh croaked out of Stolas’ throat as he nodded. He shrank slightly. 

Blitz hopped up and very gently climbed onto Stolas’ back. 

“Oof” 

He crawled over behind Stolas’ head and gave it gentle, slow scratches. He could feel a soft vibration shake through Stolas. 

“That good?” Blitz asked. The answer was a soft hoot. Still low pitched, slightly distorted. 

Blitz ran his hands through the sea of feathers, occasionally pushing his face into the mass as well. 

“Still smell good so there’s one thing you can relax about,” Blitz said. He continued massaging and crawling around Stolas’ back. Occasionally he would shrink down an inch or two. 

Eventually Blitz curled up on Stolas’ back, stretching out his arms and legs. 

“So,” he said, “don’t freak out. But Via showed me the news.” 

Stolas grew a couple of inches and growled, a low rumble of fury echoed through his body. 

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s alright.” Blitz hushed. “I mean…I’m alright. You know that shit doesn’t bother me, right?” 

No response. 

“But I know it’s not about me. You…don’t want us to look bad. Me, you, Via, even my team. I get it. You’re…you’ve always cared. I used to think you cared too much. But that was just because I didn’t really care much at all.” 

Was the huff that came from below meant to be sarcastic? Because it sure felt like it. Blitz laughed. 

“You do such a great job of taking care of us. All of us, bud.” Blitz said, wrapping a fragment of feathers up in his arms and hugging it. “Me and your kid, we wanna make sure you’re taken care of, too. Wanna make sure you know you’re loved. Even when you bird out like this.” 

Stolas began to shrink a bit more. Maybe one of his eyes folded in on itself. 

“So don’t worry about this. Remember when I was fucking nonverbal a week ago when I got off work? Couldn’t even tell you about my stupid bad day? And you stayed with me and walked me through everything and got all cute with me under the covers?” 

Blitz began easing himself off of Stolas’ back as he started to shrink more rapidly. 

“Then you got me all calm and soft and fucked me until I couldn’t see straight?” Blitz laughed. “You took care of me that night. And this shit cuts both ways. We help each other.” 

Stolas was now back down to four eyes. Normal. His feathers were still black and he was a good five feet taller than normal but he started to resemble his lanky self again. 

“And if this news shit really fucks you up like this, then you and I will take care of it together. We’ll come up with a plan. Maybe sneak around a little bit for a while, low profile and all that.” 

“Don’t…want to sneak,” Stolas breathed out. Back to words. “Not ashamed of you.” His feathers shifted into their grey-violet hue. 

“Then we’ll just have to figure out where you and I can go and not be hassled by assholes with cameras,” Blitz said. When he saw that Stolas’ claws had shrunk back down to more manageable hand-like talons he took one in his hands. “I’m a patient motherfucker with these things. We’ll make it work. I promise.” 

By the time the last word left his lips, Stolas was shrunk and shifted back to his normal, lanky self. Naked, hunched over, looking slightly scared and cold on the roof of the palace. He blinked a couple of times before Blitz jumped over into his arms to hug him tight. 

Stolas felt the sting of tears hit his eyes and let a few of them hit Blitz’s head. 

“Hey, hey, hey, none of that,” Blitz hushed, lifting an arm to wipe tears away. “You didn’t do anything wrong here. We got through this and I’m still here. Nothing bad happened.” 

All incredibly comforting words from the man he loved, but the tears were already there and had to go somewhere. So he cried with a small smile, little hoots sobbing out from his throat. Blitz sighed and tutted and kissed up Stolas’ neck. 

“I’m here, birdy,” he whispered. “Not going anywhere. You can’t fuckin’ scare me off.” 

Blitz felt the tautness of muscles in Stolas’ neck under his lips. He could feel the smile on the bird’s face. Stolas sat down and held Blitz tight, sitting him in his lap. He levitated the tea tray over. They poured each other a mug and sat against each other, listening to each other breathe on top of the sounds of the city and the wind through the garden below. 

“You think you can shift like, a little bit?” Blitz asked. “Like happy medium that shit where you’re just kind of like an anime character with the hair and the sharp teeth and muscles? That shit was hot.” 

Stolas laughed heartily. As far as Blitz was concerned it was the sweetest sound in the universe. 

“Okay but seriously could you do that?”